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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:13,096 --> 00:00:17,768 ( theme song playing ) 2 00:01:23,333 --> 00:01:24,543 Watch it! Take cover! 3 00:01:25,544 --> 00:01:26,545 Where are you going? 4 00:01:26,586 --> 00:01:27,546 Kraut patrol on the road. 5 00:01:27,587 --> 00:01:29,172 It's just what we don't need. How far? 6 00:01:29,172 --> 00:01:30,173 Half a mile, no more. 7 00:01:30,215 --> 00:01:31,800 We could have a go at him, sir. 8 00:01:31,842 --> 00:01:33,343 We're here to blow up a munitions train, 9 00:01:33,343 --> 00:01:35,137 not a patrol. Let's go. 10 00:01:35,178 --> 00:01:36,555 Carter, come on, let's go. 11 00:01:36,596 --> 00:01:37,806 Sir, we haven't finished the job. 12 00:01:37,848 --> 00:01:38,890 A few more minutes, Colonel. 13 00:01:38,932 --> 00:01:40,475 We're set to detonate. We move now. 14 00:01:40,517 --> 00:01:41,560 Sir, that bloody train 15 00:01:41,601 --> 00:01:42,853 only comes through here once a week. 16 00:01:42,894 --> 00:01:44,438 We'll get it next time around. Come on! 17 00:01:47,691 --> 00:01:49,234 ( dogs barking ) 18 00:01:51,445 --> 00:01:53,155 CARTER: For Pete's sake, what happened? 19 00:01:53,196 --> 00:01:55,073 KINCHLOE: Krauts weren't there when we left. 20 00:01:55,115 --> 00:01:57,534 HOGAN: All of a sudden we've got wall-to-wall Germans. 21 00:01:57,576 --> 00:01:59,286 Very interesting problem. 22 00:01:59,327 --> 00:02:00,287 Yeah. 23 00:02:00,328 --> 00:02:03,290 How do we escape into a P.O.W. camp? 24 00:02:21,391 --> 00:02:23,101 They must have increased patrols at midnight 25 00:02:23,143 --> 00:02:25,103 when they changed the guards. 26 00:02:25,145 --> 00:02:26,813 What's our move now, Colonel? 27 00:02:26,855 --> 00:02:28,398 It's a cinch we can't stay here. 28 00:02:28,398 --> 00:02:30,901 I say we check into a hotel for the night. 29 00:02:30,901 --> 00:02:31,985 Without a reservation? 30 00:02:32,027 --> 00:02:32,903 And no luggage? 31 00:02:32,944 --> 00:02:34,738 They'd ask for money in advance. 32 00:02:34,738 --> 00:02:36,114 All right. 33 00:02:36,156 --> 00:02:38,492 Any volunteers for a cutting job? 34 00:02:41,203 --> 00:02:42,746 HOGAN: Newkirk, Carter? 35 00:02:42,746 --> 00:02:43,914 Us two? 36 00:02:43,955 --> 00:02:45,207 "We two," Carter, "We two." 37 00:02:45,248 --> 00:02:47,918 Grammar, grammar. 38 00:02:47,959 --> 00:02:48,919 Hit that section of fence 39 00:02:48,960 --> 00:02:50,754 to the right of the guard tower. 40 00:02:50,754 --> 00:02:51,630 It's a blind spot. 41 00:02:51,671 --> 00:02:53,215 The light doesn't angle down far enough. 42 00:02:53,256 --> 00:02:53,924 Good luck. 43 00:03:21,576 --> 00:03:22,619 ( alarm ringing ) 44 00:03:22,619 --> 00:03:24,246 ( dogs barking ) 45 00:03:24,287 --> 00:03:26,039 Guard! 46 00:03:26,081 --> 00:03:27,040 Don't shoot! 47 00:03:27,082 --> 00:03:28,833 Guards, guards, guards! 48 00:03:28,875 --> 00:03:30,126 Don't shoot! Don't shoot! 49 00:03:30,168 --> 00:03:31,628 Hey, don't you recognize us? 50 00:03:31,670 --> 00:03:33,004 We're regular customers. 51 00:03:33,046 --> 00:03:34,130 Don't shoot! 52 00:03:34,130 --> 00:03:36,800 Good evening, gentlemen. 53 00:03:36,800 --> 00:03:37,968 Oh, good evening, Commandant. 54 00:03:38,260 --> 00:03:39,469 Hi. 55 00:03:39,469 --> 00:03:41,554 Put your hands up 56 00:03:41,596 --> 00:03:45,016 on top of your head like this! 57 00:03:45,058 --> 00:03:46,226 Just put your hands up. 58 00:03:46,268 --> 00:03:48,061 If they make one wrong move, 59 00:03:48,103 --> 00:03:49,813 shoot them. 60 00:03:49,854 --> 00:03:53,650 Now, what exactly were you fools trying to do, huh? 61 00:03:53,650 --> 00:03:55,068 I was trying to get out of camp. 62 00:03:55,110 --> 00:03:56,987 I should think that's fairly obvious, sir. 63 00:03:56,987 --> 00:03:58,321 Me, I was trying to get in. 64 00:03:58,321 --> 00:03:59,948 Trying to get out of camp, sir, 65 00:04:00,323 --> 00:04:01,825 into the town, you see. 66 00:04:01,866 --> 00:04:05,287 Schultz, into the cooler they go. 67 00:04:05,328 --> 00:04:06,579 Throw away the keys. 68 00:04:06,621 --> 00:04:07,831 Jawohl, Herr Kommandant. 69 00:04:07,872 --> 00:04:09,499 Don't we get a trial or anything? 70 00:04:09,499 --> 00:04:10,667 This is Germany. 71 00:04:10,709 --> 00:04:13,003 I do admire your sense of humor. 72 00:04:13,044 --> 00:04:14,004 Schultz, 73 00:04:14,045 --> 00:04:15,005 take them away. 74 00:04:15,046 --> 00:04:15,964 Jawohl. 75 00:04:16,006 --> 00:04:17,215 Come on. Let's go. 76 00:04:17,257 --> 00:04:20,051 ( Schultz mumbling ) 77 00:04:32,522 --> 00:04:33,815 They weren't really trying to escape. 78 00:04:33,857 --> 00:04:34,816 Yeah, yeah. 79 00:04:34,858 --> 00:04:35,859 They were going into town 80 00:04:35,859 --> 00:04:37,027 for a very good reason. 81 00:04:37,068 --> 00:04:38,695 Yeah, yeah, yeah. To buy something. 82 00:04:38,737 --> 00:04:39,779 They would have come right back. 83 00:04:39,821 --> 00:04:41,281 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 84 00:04:41,322 --> 00:04:43,283 A birthday gift for you. 85 00:04:43,324 --> 00:04:44,325 For me? 86 00:04:44,367 --> 00:04:45,910 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 87 00:04:45,952 --> 00:04:48,371 I don't believe it. 88 00:04:48,413 --> 00:04:50,999 Don't let the war make you cynical, sir. 89 00:04:51,041 --> 00:04:53,084 I was not aware that it's my birthday. 90 00:04:53,126 --> 00:04:55,628 Isn't it about time you found out? 91 00:04:55,670 --> 00:04:58,131 I wouldn't believe one word you said, Hogan. 92 00:04:58,173 --> 00:04:59,132 Not even if I said 93 00:04:59,174 --> 00:05:00,467 you were the greatest military mind 94 00:05:00,508 --> 00:05:02,761 in the Third Reich? 95 00:05:02,802 --> 00:05:04,304 That I'd have to think over. 96 00:05:04,345 --> 00:05:05,472 Look, Commandant, 97 00:05:05,513 --> 00:05:07,891 Newkirk and Carter have already spent a day in the cooler. 98 00:05:07,891 --> 00:05:08,975 Let 'em out. 99 00:05:09,017 --> 00:05:10,018 Request denied, 100 00:05:10,059 --> 00:05:12,228 and when General Burkhalter makes 101 00:05:12,228 --> 00:05:14,230 his inspection tour next week, 102 00:05:14,230 --> 00:05:16,232 those two men in the cooler will prove 103 00:05:16,274 --> 00:05:18,485 that discipline is enforced here at Stalag 13. 104 00:05:18,526 --> 00:05:19,486 That's all, Hogan. 105 00:05:19,527 --> 00:05:21,738 That's why the patrols are being beefed up. 106 00:05:21,738 --> 00:05:23,615 Showing off for Burkhalter, are they? 107 00:05:23,656 --> 00:05:24,824 I said that's all. 108 00:05:24,866 --> 00:05:26,409 Reconsider, Commandant. 109 00:05:26,451 --> 00:05:29,621 Those two men will be released over my dead body. 110 00:05:29,662 --> 00:05:30,121 It's a deal. 111 00:05:32,332 --> 00:05:34,125 Dis... missed. 112 00:05:38,463 --> 00:05:40,673 Here's your answer from London, Colonel. 113 00:05:40,715 --> 00:05:42,467 "Turn the job over to the underground." 114 00:05:42,509 --> 00:05:43,468 They're kidding. 115 00:05:43,510 --> 00:05:45,553 "Hold off your unit and sabotage operation 116 00:05:45,595 --> 00:05:46,679 "on munitions train. 117 00:05:46,721 --> 00:05:48,264 Wait for orders near future." 118 00:05:48,264 --> 00:05:50,725 You think they're trying to tell you something? 119 00:05:50,767 --> 00:05:51,768 "Yeah, don't call us. 120 00:05:51,768 --> 00:05:52,769 We'll call you," 121 00:05:52,769 --> 00:05:54,687 and I still say it was the right decision. 122 00:05:54,729 --> 00:05:57,440 If we had stayed and knocked off that kraut patrol, 123 00:05:57,440 --> 00:05:59,984 there might have been a Gestapo investigation. 124 00:06:00,026 --> 00:06:02,153 Could have endangered our whole operation. 125 00:06:02,195 --> 00:06:04,280 The pity is, it's only a few minutes' work 126 00:06:04,280 --> 00:06:05,657 to do on those detonators. 127 00:06:05,698 --> 00:06:07,033 It's the underground's now. 128 00:06:07,075 --> 00:06:08,034 Let them handle it. 129 00:06:08,076 --> 00:06:09,452 That munitions train is ours. 130 00:06:09,494 --> 00:06:12,455 We started the job, we'll finish it. 131 00:06:12,497 --> 00:06:15,500 KINCH: But how? We can't get out. 132 00:06:15,583 --> 00:06:17,585 Klink's turned this place into Alcatraz. 133 00:06:17,627 --> 00:06:19,254 And he's acting like the warden. 134 00:06:19,295 --> 00:06:21,464 We could figure some way to distract Klink, 135 00:06:21,464 --> 00:06:22,465 keep him busy. 136 00:06:22,507 --> 00:06:24,133 Burkhalter picked a swell time 137 00:06:24,175 --> 00:06:25,301 for an inspection tour. 138 00:06:25,301 --> 00:06:27,095 Remember the last visit? 139 00:06:27,136 --> 00:06:28,846 He even brought his sister. 140 00:06:28,888 --> 00:06:29,973 The lady dragon. 141 00:06:29,973 --> 00:06:31,641 Yeah, and Klink had to put on his track shoes 142 00:06:31,641 --> 00:06:32,809 to keep out of the way. 143 00:06:32,809 --> 00:06:35,478 Now hold it, hold it. 144 00:06:35,478 --> 00:06:36,854 Why wouldn't it work again? 145 00:06:36,896 --> 00:06:38,106 What work again? 146 00:06:38,147 --> 00:06:41,526 Gertrude Linkmaier, Burkhalter's sister. 147 00:06:41,568 --> 00:06:44,237 If she came with him, it would distract Klink. 148 00:06:44,279 --> 00:06:46,030 He'd let down the guards and ease off. 149 00:06:46,072 --> 00:06:47,657 It's one way to get out of camp. 150 00:06:47,699 --> 00:06:49,993 Newkirk could forge Klink's handwriting. 151 00:06:49,993 --> 00:06:51,160 He's done it before. 152 00:06:51,202 --> 00:06:53,997 Send Madam Linkmaier a little invitation for openers 153 00:06:54,038 --> 00:06:55,665 on Klink's personal stationery. 154 00:06:55,707 --> 00:06:58,209 That's crazy. 155 00:06:58,251 --> 00:07:00,003 Yeah, crazy enough to work. 156 00:07:00,044 --> 00:07:01,546 Just one little detail, Colonel. 157 00:07:01,587 --> 00:07:02,630 What do we tell London? 158 00:07:02,672 --> 00:07:04,090 Stall 'em. 159 00:07:04,132 --> 00:07:05,383 Tell 'em we've come up with a new plan. 160 00:07:05,425 --> 00:07:06,676 Request permission to proceed 161 00:07:06,676 --> 00:07:08,177 and impossible to communicate with the Underground. 162 00:07:08,219 --> 00:07:09,178 Something like that. 163 00:07:09,220 --> 00:07:11,222 You're turning me into a pretty good liar. 164 00:07:11,264 --> 00:07:13,224 Kinch, what kind of officer would I be 165 00:07:13,266 --> 00:07:14,559 if you couldn't learn from me? 166 00:07:16,060 --> 00:07:21,357 SCHULTZ: Mm! Mm! 167 00:07:21,357 --> 00:07:24,902 Mm, that's good! Mm! 168 00:07:24,944 --> 00:07:26,779 Where do you get the chocolate? 169 00:07:26,821 --> 00:07:28,031 I smuggle it in. 170 00:07:28,072 --> 00:07:29,449 That's banned. 171 00:07:29,490 --> 00:07:30,867 I will have to report you. 172 00:07:30,908 --> 00:07:32,201 Oh, yeah? 173 00:07:32,243 --> 00:07:33,995 Then you'd just better report yourself, too, big fella, 174 00:07:34,037 --> 00:07:35,788 'cause eating it makes you an accomplice. 175 00:07:35,830 --> 00:07:37,206 No. 176 00:07:37,206 --> 00:07:40,043 I thought it only makes you fat. 177 00:07:40,043 --> 00:07:41,586 Mm. 178 00:07:41,627 --> 00:07:43,212 "And so my dear Gertrude-- 179 00:07:43,212 --> 00:07:45,506 "if I may call you by your first name-- 180 00:07:45,548 --> 00:07:48,217 "it will give me great pleasure to have you visit 181 00:07:48,217 --> 00:07:51,345 "our little Stalag again with your brother the general. 182 00:07:51,387 --> 00:07:54,265 "Perhaps we could even be alone so I could tell you 183 00:07:54,307 --> 00:07:56,684 "some of the things I could not say to you 184 00:07:56,726 --> 00:07:57,643 on your last trip." 185 00:07:59,395 --> 00:08:00,772 Danke. 186 00:08:00,813 --> 00:08:03,191 Now I'm going to see the Englander. 187 00:08:03,232 --> 00:08:04,734 New Newkirk, got any candy?! 188 00:08:04,776 --> 00:08:06,277 The bear's headed your way! 189 00:08:06,319 --> 00:08:08,571 Shh! Don't be so noisy! 190 00:08:08,613 --> 00:08:09,864 Anything you guys need? 191 00:08:09,906 --> 00:08:12,325 Oh, yes, sir. When LeBeau brings the dinner tonight... 192 00:08:12,366 --> 00:08:13,743 Uh-huh. 193 00:08:13,785 --> 00:08:14,660 No bearnaise sauce. I'm not up to it. 194 00:08:14,702 --> 00:08:15,453 Yeah. 195 00:08:28,090 --> 00:08:30,343 Ah, General Burkhalter, 196 00:08:30,384 --> 00:08:34,055 it is indeed a great pleasure to see you again. 197 00:08:34,096 --> 00:08:37,141 You remember my sister, of course. 198 00:08:37,183 --> 00:08:38,351 Of course. 199 00:08:38,392 --> 00:08:40,186 A great pleasure. 200 00:08:40,228 --> 00:08:42,271 Guten Tag, Klink. 201 00:08:46,275 --> 00:08:50,446 And Gertrude just announced that she was coming along, 202 00:08:50,446 --> 00:08:51,948 and here I am. 203 00:08:51,948 --> 00:08:54,200 I couldn't be happier. 204 00:08:54,242 --> 00:08:57,286 Frau Linkmaier, you are as welcome here 205 00:08:57,286 --> 00:08:59,163 as the general himself. 206 00:08:59,205 --> 00:09:02,291 We will give you the very best we have here at Stalag 13. 207 00:09:02,333 --> 00:09:05,461 Nice way to treat a lady. 208 00:09:05,461 --> 00:09:06,504 Elbert. 209 00:09:06,546 --> 00:09:08,089 On the way here, 210 00:09:08,130 --> 00:09:11,926 my dear sister kept talking about you. 211 00:09:11,968 --> 00:09:12,927 About me? 212 00:09:12,969 --> 00:09:14,554 What is there to say? 213 00:09:14,595 --> 00:09:17,139 The conversation didn't last too long. 214 00:09:17,139 --> 00:09:19,809 I'm flattered. 215 00:09:19,809 --> 00:09:22,979 What is this magic you have, Klink? 216 00:09:23,020 --> 00:09:25,648 You seem to grow on people. 217 00:09:25,690 --> 00:09:29,485 Elbert, you make him sound like some kind of a fungus. 218 00:09:29,485 --> 00:09:30,903 ( chuckles ) 219 00:09:30,945 --> 00:09:31,988 Fungus. 220 00:09:31,988 --> 00:09:33,322 Schultz... 221 00:09:33,322 --> 00:09:35,825 Excuse me, Herr Kommandant. 222 00:09:35,866 --> 00:09:38,452 More brandy for Frau Linkmaier and the general, please. 223 00:09:38,494 --> 00:09:40,037 Yes, sir, Kommandant. 224 00:09:41,914 --> 00:09:44,333 Just a little. 225 00:09:44,375 --> 00:09:46,544 Enough. Danke. 226 00:09:48,421 --> 00:09:49,755 ( chuckles ) 227 00:09:49,797 --> 00:09:51,215 Fungus. 228 00:09:51,257 --> 00:09:53,175 Not for me. 229 00:09:53,175 --> 00:09:55,386 I'm a bit tired. 230 00:09:55,428 --> 00:09:59,140 Anyway, I imagine you two young people 231 00:09:59,181 --> 00:10:00,891 would like to be alone. 232 00:10:00,933 --> 00:10:01,892 Young people? 233 00:10:01,934 --> 00:10:03,436 I don't see any young people. 234 00:10:03,477 --> 00:10:05,187 Good night, Elbert. 235 00:10:05,187 --> 00:10:07,732 Good night, Gertrude. 236 00:10:07,773 --> 00:10:11,444 And as the French say, bonne chance. 237 00:10:11,485 --> 00:10:13,904 That means "good luck." 238 00:10:13,946 --> 00:10:15,573 He is terrible. 239 00:10:15,614 --> 00:10:18,034 Good night, Herr General. 240 00:10:18,075 --> 00:10:20,453 You stay here no matter what happens. 241 00:10:20,494 --> 00:10:26,500 Sergeant, come in here and help me with my boots. 242 00:10:26,542 --> 00:10:27,626 What are you standing around? 243 00:10:27,668 --> 00:10:28,878 You heard the general. 244 00:10:28,878 --> 00:10:31,088 Good night, General Burkhalter. 245 00:10:31,130 --> 00:10:32,381 Good night. 246 00:10:33,549 --> 00:10:35,426 Well, here we are. 247 00:10:35,468 --> 00:10:38,179 Indeed, we are. 248 00:10:38,220 --> 00:10:39,555 We are here. 249 00:10:39,555 --> 00:10:41,807 There's no question about that. 250 00:10:41,849 --> 00:10:43,684 I remember that about you. 251 00:10:43,726 --> 00:10:46,062 A brilliant conversationalist. 252 00:10:46,312 --> 00:10:47,563 Danke. 253 00:10:47,605 --> 00:10:49,607 Now that we are alone, 254 00:10:49,648 --> 00:10:53,527 what is it you wanted to say to me, Wilhelm? 255 00:10:53,569 --> 00:10:57,239 Wilhelm-- my first name? 256 00:10:57,281 --> 00:11:00,868 If it's Gertrude, then it should be Wilhelm. 257 00:11:00,910 --> 00:11:01,952 Of course, 258 00:11:01,994 --> 00:11:06,082 you cannot call me Gertrude because that is your name, 259 00:11:06,082 --> 00:11:07,917 if you know what I mean. 260 00:11:07,917 --> 00:11:09,543 ( nervous laughter ) 261 00:11:09,585 --> 00:11:11,712 What is it you want to say to me, Wilhelm? 262 00:11:11,754 --> 00:11:16,801 Well, now, let me see. 263 00:11:16,884 --> 00:11:20,262 Uh, I've offered you more brandy. 264 00:11:20,304 --> 00:11:23,682 Um, we have straightened out the name business... 265 00:11:23,724 --> 00:11:26,936 You remind me of my first husband Otto. 266 00:11:26,977 --> 00:11:28,354 He was shy, too. 267 00:11:28,395 --> 00:11:31,774 Sit down. 268 00:11:31,816 --> 00:11:36,862 Well, you see, a soldier like I is more at home 269 00:11:36,904 --> 00:11:40,574 in the rough company of men on the battlefield. 270 00:11:40,616 --> 00:11:43,577 Good, I'll handle this. 271 00:11:43,619 --> 00:11:44,870 I'm sure you will. 272 00:11:44,912 --> 00:11:46,956 Handle what? 273 00:11:46,956 --> 00:11:50,125 I realize that I am not the most beautiful, 274 00:11:50,167 --> 00:11:53,128 the most fascinating woman in the world... 275 00:11:53,295 --> 00:11:54,296 That's true. 276 00:11:54,296 --> 00:11:55,714 You don't need to agree 277 00:11:55,756 --> 00:11:57,466 with me so quickly, Wilhelm. 278 00:11:57,508 --> 00:11:59,844 No offense, Frau... 279 00:11:59,885 --> 00:12:01,345 Gertrude. 280 00:12:01,387 --> 00:12:03,722 That's right-- Gertrude. 281 00:12:03,764 --> 00:12:08,394 I know I'm going to make a certain man very happy. 282 00:12:08,435 --> 00:12:10,187 Make a good wife to him. 283 00:12:10,229 --> 00:12:11,438 Just what he needs. 284 00:12:11,480 --> 00:12:14,316 Oh, there is no question about it in my mind. 285 00:12:14,316 --> 00:12:15,818 Congratulations. Danke. 286 00:12:15,943 --> 00:12:17,278 Who's the lucky man? 287 00:12:17,319 --> 00:12:18,320 Do I know him? 288 00:12:18,320 --> 00:12:20,197 Oh, you know him very well. 289 00:12:20,239 --> 00:12:21,365 Don't be coy. 290 00:12:21,407 --> 00:12:23,117 Oh, I'm not trying to be coy. 291 00:12:23,158 --> 00:12:24,368 I... 292 00:12:26,829 --> 00:12:28,455 Me. 293 00:12:28,497 --> 00:12:30,583 More brandy please, Wilhelm. 294 00:12:43,053 --> 00:12:44,763 They've been in the cooler long enough. 295 00:12:44,805 --> 00:12:46,056 Make a gesture, Commandant. 296 00:12:46,098 --> 00:12:48,475 In honor of General Berkhalter's visit, release them. 297 00:12:48,517 --> 00:12:51,228 I'd like to be released myself. 298 00:12:51,270 --> 00:12:53,564 You haven't been paying attention. 299 00:12:53,606 --> 00:12:55,524 Frankly, Hogan, I've got a big problem. 300 00:12:55,566 --> 00:12:57,526 Yeah, I know, I saw her arrive. 301 00:12:57,568 --> 00:12:59,028 Frau Linkmaier likes me, 302 00:12:59,069 --> 00:13:02,031 and what's worse, she's thinking about marriage. 303 00:13:02,072 --> 00:13:04,199 What woman isn't constantly? 304 00:13:04,241 --> 00:13:05,576 She's a widow. 305 00:13:05,618 --> 00:13:07,870 I remind her of her first husband Otto. 306 00:13:07,870 --> 00:13:10,497 He's been missing in action for three years. 307 00:13:10,539 --> 00:13:11,665 Could be on the lam. 308 00:13:11,707 --> 00:13:13,500 Marriage. 309 00:13:13,542 --> 00:13:16,045 I can't even think about it. 310 00:13:16,086 --> 00:13:17,838 What am I going to do? 311 00:13:17,880 --> 00:13:20,382 May I offer some advice, Commandant? 312 00:13:20,382 --> 00:13:22,217 That's very decent of you, Hogan. 313 00:13:22,217 --> 00:13:23,302 Tell me what to do. 314 00:13:23,344 --> 00:13:24,887 First you tell me something. 315 00:13:24,887 --> 00:13:26,597 Anything you want, you name it. 316 00:13:26,639 --> 00:13:29,099 When are Newkirk and Carter getting out of the cooler? 317 00:13:29,141 --> 00:13:32,353 I will not bargain with a prisoner of war. 318 00:13:32,603 --> 00:13:33,604 Why not? 319 00:13:33,645 --> 00:13:35,522 I'm willing to bargain with a prisoner of love. 320 00:13:35,564 --> 00:13:36,648 Don't say anything like that. 321 00:13:38,233 --> 00:13:40,486 All right, Hogan. 322 00:13:40,527 --> 00:13:43,155 If you help me get rid of Frau Linkmaier, 323 00:13:43,197 --> 00:13:45,240 I will release your men for you. 324 00:13:45,282 --> 00:13:46,241 It's a deal. 325 00:13:46,283 --> 00:13:47,910 First thing you've got to do is get busy. 326 00:13:47,951 --> 00:13:48,911 What? 327 00:13:48,952 --> 00:13:51,914 Nothing chills a woman faster than a busy man. 328 00:13:51,914 --> 00:13:54,917 They can't stand being neglected for anything. 329 00:13:54,917 --> 00:13:57,503 Oh, I see. 330 00:13:57,544 --> 00:14:01,090 I'm too involved in my work to find time for her. 331 00:14:01,131 --> 00:14:02,424 Exactly. 332 00:14:02,424 --> 00:14:04,385 Very good. 333 00:14:04,426 --> 00:14:06,762 Of course, it may involve a sacrifice 334 00:14:06,804 --> 00:14:08,514 on your part, Commandant. 335 00:14:08,555 --> 00:14:10,432 Sacrifice? In what way? 336 00:14:10,474 --> 00:14:12,643 You may actually have to go to work. 337 00:14:15,437 --> 00:14:17,731 I want this section from here to the gate 338 00:14:17,773 --> 00:14:19,942 inspected and strengthened if necessary. 339 00:14:19,942 --> 00:14:21,068 What's he doing? 340 00:14:21,110 --> 00:14:23,487 Posting more men outside the wire. 341 00:14:23,529 --> 00:14:25,322 Making things a little tighter. 342 00:14:25,364 --> 00:14:28,492 Yeah, I got him busy all right-- the wrong way. 343 00:14:30,661 --> 00:14:32,746 Herr Kommandant, please excuse me, 344 00:14:32,788 --> 00:14:35,749 but it is after 4:00, and you have an invitation 345 00:14:35,791 --> 00:14:39,086 for tea in the general's quarters with Frau Linkmaier. 346 00:14:39,128 --> 00:14:40,629 Tell her I can't be there. 347 00:14:40,629 --> 00:14:41,713 I am too busy. 348 00:14:41,755 --> 00:14:42,923 Express my regrets. 349 00:14:42,965 --> 00:14:46,051 Oh, excuse me, Herr Kommandant, is it wise? 350 00:14:46,093 --> 00:14:48,846 After all, she is the general's sister 351 00:14:48,887 --> 00:14:50,013 and she is a woman. 352 00:14:50,055 --> 00:14:52,057 Thank you. 353 00:14:52,099 --> 00:14:53,642 I was puzzled. 354 00:14:53,642 --> 00:14:56,812 Herr Kommandant, there's even a rumor 355 00:14:56,854 --> 00:14:58,856 that there will be wedding bells 356 00:14:58,897 --> 00:15:02,484 for you and the gnadige Frau. 357 00:15:02,484 --> 00:15:04,820 That is only a rumor. 358 00:15:04,820 --> 00:15:07,156 But if it should happen, Schultz, I promise you 359 00:15:07,197 --> 00:15:09,616 you will be the first one to hear those wedding bells. 360 00:15:09,658 --> 00:15:11,326 Oh, danke, Herr Kommandant. 361 00:15:11,368 --> 00:15:13,829 Even on the Russian front. 362 00:15:18,333 --> 00:15:20,794 Very good dinner, Sergeant. 363 00:15:20,836 --> 00:15:22,170 Thank you, General. 364 00:15:22,212 --> 00:15:23,589 KLINK: Good evening. 365 00:15:23,630 --> 00:15:24,673 Good evening. 366 00:15:24,673 --> 00:15:25,799 Good evening, Wilhelm. 367 00:15:25,841 --> 00:15:27,175 Herr Kommandant, your coat? 368 00:15:27,175 --> 00:15:29,678 No, Schultz, I'm afraid I must go right out again. 369 00:15:29,720 --> 00:15:31,680 A little surprise visit to our patrols. 370 00:15:31,722 --> 00:15:33,098 It's a surprise to me, too. 371 00:15:33,140 --> 00:15:34,683 You have not had your dinner. 372 00:15:34,725 --> 00:15:35,767 Oh, I apologize. 373 00:15:35,809 --> 00:15:36,810 Please forgive me. 374 00:15:36,852 --> 00:15:39,563 I can stay just long enough to have some coffee. 375 00:15:39,605 --> 00:15:40,647 Schultz. 376 00:15:40,689 --> 00:15:43,692 I never realized you were so dedicated 377 00:15:43,734 --> 00:15:45,235 to your job, Klink. 378 00:15:45,277 --> 00:15:48,572 I'm afraid that's why I don't have much of a social life. 379 00:15:48,614 --> 00:15:50,490 In a way, I'm married to the war. 380 00:15:50,532 --> 00:15:52,200 I think I understand, Klink. 381 00:15:52,242 --> 00:15:55,704 You know, Frau Linkmaier, I have neglected you shamefully, 382 00:15:55,746 --> 00:15:57,205 but that's the way I am. 383 00:15:57,247 --> 00:15:59,291 Ja, I see that, 384 00:15:59,333 --> 00:16:01,126 and I admire you for it. 385 00:16:01,168 --> 00:16:02,878 Admire me? 386 00:16:02,919 --> 00:16:05,714 Ja, I like a man who puts his job first. 387 00:16:05,756 --> 00:16:08,425 Women must learn to take second place. 388 00:16:08,467 --> 00:16:11,470 You have gone up in my estimation, Wilhelm. 389 00:16:11,511 --> 00:16:13,221 Schultz, take this away. 390 00:16:13,263 --> 00:16:15,390 Get me a schnapps, make it a double. 391 00:16:17,100 --> 00:16:18,101 Admires you? 392 00:16:18,143 --> 00:16:20,062 How could anybody do that? 393 00:16:20,103 --> 00:16:22,064 You don't know that woman. 394 00:16:22,105 --> 00:16:23,732 What about Carter and Newkirk? 395 00:16:23,732 --> 00:16:24,983 They stay in the cooler. 396 00:16:25,025 --> 00:16:27,235 Your marvelous advice got me where I am. 397 00:16:27,277 --> 00:16:28,320 Now I'll give you some. 398 00:16:28,362 --> 00:16:29,529 You'd better straighten up 399 00:16:29,571 --> 00:16:31,406 and toe the line around here or else. 400 00:16:31,406 --> 00:16:33,116 Look, Commandant... 401 00:16:33,158 --> 00:16:35,118 When addressing your commanding officer, 402 00:16:35,160 --> 00:16:37,079 you should be in uniform. 403 00:16:37,079 --> 00:16:39,456 Okay, okay. 404 00:16:39,498 --> 00:16:41,375 That's better. 405 00:16:45,420 --> 00:16:46,421 What is it, Colonel? 406 00:16:46,463 --> 00:16:47,631 What's our first move? 407 00:16:47,673 --> 00:16:48,840 To get a new plan. 408 00:16:48,882 --> 00:16:50,300 What? You're kidding. 409 00:16:50,342 --> 00:16:52,094 I told you, we started this job, 410 00:16:52,135 --> 00:16:53,595 we're going to finish it. 411 00:16:53,637 --> 00:16:54,679 Or it finishes us. 412 00:16:54,721 --> 00:16:57,057 Every kraut and his brother's out there patrolling. 413 00:16:57,099 --> 00:16:58,642 Klink didn't pull any of the guard. 414 00:16:58,683 --> 00:17:00,185 And the biggest kraut of them all, 415 00:17:00,227 --> 00:17:01,937 Monsieur Klink, is roaming around, too. 416 00:17:01,978 --> 00:17:04,606 We're going to set those detonators Wednesday or else. 417 00:17:04,648 --> 00:17:05,732 Or else what? 418 00:17:05,774 --> 00:17:07,150 Get killed trying? 419 00:17:07,192 --> 00:17:11,613 There are times I wish you guys wouldn't read my mind. 420 00:17:11,655 --> 00:17:13,657 Tell her the truth? 421 00:17:13,698 --> 00:17:15,951 I know it's a strange idea to you, Commandant, 422 00:17:15,951 --> 00:17:17,119 but she might go for it. 423 00:17:17,160 --> 00:17:19,037 Tell her that she's too old for me, 424 00:17:19,079 --> 00:17:20,831 that I don't find her attractive, 425 00:17:20,872 --> 00:17:22,165 that she's not my type? 426 00:17:22,207 --> 00:17:24,334 She isn't anybody's type, 427 00:17:24,376 --> 00:17:26,128 but you don't have to mention that to her. 428 00:17:26,169 --> 00:17:27,129 No, that's impossible. 429 00:17:27,170 --> 00:17:28,213 Then marry her. 430 00:17:28,255 --> 00:17:29,714 You, too, could be missing in action 431 00:17:29,798 --> 00:17:30,799 like her first husband. 432 00:17:30,841 --> 00:17:32,342 You might even be able to meet him 433 00:17:32,384 --> 00:17:34,052 wherever he's hiding and form a club. 434 00:17:34,094 --> 00:17:36,513 Tell her the truth, huh? 435 00:17:36,555 --> 00:17:39,641 Maybe the very frankness of it could discourage her. 436 00:17:39,683 --> 00:17:42,853 Look at it this way, what do you got to lose but her? 437 00:17:42,894 --> 00:17:44,813 You're right, Hogan. 438 00:17:44,813 --> 00:17:45,856 I will see her today. 439 00:17:45,897 --> 00:17:47,482 Commandant, for a man of the world, 440 00:17:47,524 --> 00:17:48,525 you surprise me. 441 00:17:48,567 --> 00:17:50,277 Don't you know anything about women? 442 00:17:50,318 --> 00:17:52,445 What does that got to do with Frau Linkmaier? 443 00:17:52,487 --> 00:17:54,114 With women, finesse is everything. 444 00:17:54,156 --> 00:17:56,199 Take her out, say tomorrow night. 445 00:17:56,241 --> 00:17:57,993 Tomorrow night, Wednesday? 446 00:17:57,993 --> 00:17:59,327 Why not? Nice moonlight drive. 447 00:17:59,327 --> 00:18:00,537 Then you park. 448 00:18:00,579 --> 00:18:02,622 There's a great spot about halfway to Hemleberg. 449 00:18:02,664 --> 00:18:04,875 Right near the railroad crossing, can't miss it. 450 00:18:04,916 --> 00:18:06,459 How do you know about that? 451 00:18:06,501 --> 00:18:09,212 Uh... uh... one of the guards told me about it. 452 00:18:09,254 --> 00:18:11,339 Takes all his frauleins there. 453 00:18:11,339 --> 00:18:14,342 I see. 454 00:18:14,384 --> 00:18:16,344 I'll try it. 455 00:18:16,386 --> 00:18:19,598 It seems to make sense. 456 00:18:19,639 --> 00:18:21,433 Good, good. 457 00:18:21,474 --> 00:18:22,851 Why? 458 00:18:22,893 --> 00:18:25,979 Why did I have to be born so attractive? 459 00:18:26,021 --> 00:18:28,440 That's another whole question. 460 00:18:28,481 --> 00:18:29,858 Right now, let's stick to the truth. 461 00:18:55,425 --> 00:18:57,719 KLINK: Schultz, come in here. 462 00:18:57,761 --> 00:19:00,221 Yes, Herr Kommandant, I'm coming. 463 00:19:13,526 --> 00:19:14,569 ( indistinct talking ) 464 00:19:16,655 --> 00:19:17,572 Danke, Shultz. 465 00:19:25,080 --> 00:19:27,082 ( car engine starts ) 466 00:19:37,509 --> 00:19:40,011 Shultz, we won't need you for a while. 467 00:19:40,053 --> 00:19:41,971 Uh, take a walk in the woods. 468 00:19:42,013 --> 00:19:43,431 Alone? 469 00:19:43,431 --> 00:19:47,185 I'm sorry we didn't bring a girlfriend for you. 470 00:19:47,227 --> 00:19:48,436 ( chuckles ) 471 00:19:48,436 --> 00:19:50,063 Get out. 472 00:19:50,105 --> 00:19:53,942 Uh, there's a nice moon out tonight, Herr Kommandant. 473 00:19:54,401 --> 00:19:55,610 Thank you, Shultz. 474 00:19:55,860 --> 00:19:57,487 Get out. 475 00:19:57,529 --> 00:19:59,781 Jawohl, Herr Kommandant. 476 00:20:01,991 --> 00:20:04,994 ( crickets chirping ) 477 00:20:05,036 --> 00:20:06,788 ( bird cawing ) 478 00:20:11,042 --> 00:20:11,793 ( banging ) 479 00:20:20,135 --> 00:20:22,387 Well, here we are. 480 00:20:22,429 --> 00:20:25,265 Ja, alone again, Wilhelm. 481 00:20:28,393 --> 00:20:30,728 It is very romantic. I approve. 482 00:20:30,770 --> 00:20:32,981 I'm glad you approve. 483 00:20:32,981 --> 00:20:36,067 And, uh, I approve of your approval. 484 00:20:36,109 --> 00:20:37,861 What is it, Wilhelm? 485 00:20:37,902 --> 00:20:41,656 Gertrude... uh, Frau Linkmaier... 486 00:20:41,698 --> 00:20:45,994 uh, I realize that you are very 487 00:20:46,035 --> 00:20:48,288 strongly attracted to me. 488 00:20:48,329 --> 00:20:50,248 It's, uh, one of those things. 489 00:20:50,290 --> 00:20:52,125 You can't help yourself. 490 00:20:52,167 --> 00:20:55,170 The moth and the flame. 491 00:21:07,515 --> 00:21:11,144 ( bird cawing ) 492 00:21:15,231 --> 00:21:17,567 I admire you very much. 493 00:21:17,609 --> 00:21:20,820 You're strong and forceful. 494 00:21:20,862 --> 00:21:21,946 Ja. 495 00:21:21,988 --> 00:21:24,866 And, uh, forceful and strong. 496 00:21:24,866 --> 00:21:26,367 Danke, Wilhelm. 497 00:21:26,367 --> 00:21:27,327 But for a wife, 498 00:21:27,368 --> 00:21:28,995 I would like somebody weak and stupid. 499 00:21:29,037 --> 00:21:29,996 What? 500 00:21:30,038 --> 00:21:32,707 Someone I can talk to. 501 00:21:32,707 --> 00:21:34,500 Schultz! 502 00:21:37,045 --> 00:21:38,796 Schultz! 503 00:21:40,965 --> 00:21:42,300 Schultz! 504 00:21:45,637 --> 00:21:47,263 Did you call, sir? 505 00:21:47,305 --> 00:21:49,140 Oh, uh, I mean, did you, Frau? 506 00:21:49,182 --> 00:21:50,433 Back to the camp at once. 507 00:21:50,475 --> 00:21:51,976 Jawol, Herr Kommandannt. 508 00:21:52,018 --> 00:21:53,228 Oh, I mean, Frau. 509 00:21:53,228 --> 00:21:54,646 At once, sir. 510 00:22:03,196 --> 00:22:05,657 ( engine starts ) 511 00:22:30,264 --> 00:22:32,600 But, Frau Linkmaier, please. 512 00:22:36,437 --> 00:22:37,897 Gertrude... 513 00:22:37,939 --> 00:22:39,899 Mrs. Linkmaier. 514 00:22:39,941 --> 00:22:41,693 ( engine rumbling ) 515 00:22:41,734 --> 00:22:43,861 Hogan! 516 00:22:43,903 --> 00:22:46,114 Yes, sir? 517 00:22:46,114 --> 00:22:49,575 What are you doing out of the barracks? 518 00:22:49,617 --> 00:22:50,785 Well, I was anxious 519 00:22:50,827 --> 00:22:52,620 about your date with the iron maiden. 520 00:22:52,620 --> 00:22:53,705 I told her the truth. 521 00:22:53,746 --> 00:22:54,706 I don't believe it. 522 00:22:54,747 --> 00:22:55,790 Every word of it. 523 00:22:55,832 --> 00:22:56,916 Come on, Commandant. 524 00:22:56,958 --> 00:22:58,793 May lightening strike me if I didn't. 525 00:22:58,835 --> 00:23:04,799 ( explosion ) 526 00:23:04,799 --> 00:23:06,843 ( rumbling ) 527 00:23:06,884 --> 00:23:09,303 Okay, I'm convinced. 528 00:23:14,517 --> 00:23:17,478 She blames me for this. 529 00:23:17,520 --> 00:23:20,481 She is going to make my life miserable. 530 00:23:20,481 --> 00:23:21,774 But, sir... 531 00:23:21,816 --> 00:23:23,443 Klink, I am going to get you 532 00:23:23,484 --> 00:23:25,945 a reservation on the first troop train heading east. 533 00:23:25,987 --> 00:23:26,946 But, General... 534 00:23:26,988 --> 00:23:29,657 Or I'll send you by plane, or by ship. 535 00:23:29,699 --> 00:23:31,993 If necessary, I'll carry you 536 00:23:31,993 --> 00:23:33,244 to the Russian front. 537 00:23:33,286 --> 00:23:34,704 Piggy-back! 538 00:23:34,746 --> 00:23:37,039 General, you're being unfair to the commandant. 539 00:23:37,081 --> 00:23:38,458 He is? 540 00:23:38,499 --> 00:23:40,793 Why unfair, Hogan? 541 00:23:40,835 --> 00:23:42,837 Oh, he was only trying to save you and your sister 542 00:23:42,837 --> 00:23:44,547 from a lot of embarrassment. 543 00:23:44,589 --> 00:23:45,673 I was? 544 00:23:45,673 --> 00:23:49,510 He knows he's not good enough for the Burkhalters. 545 00:23:49,510 --> 00:23:50,678 I'm not? 546 00:23:50,678 --> 00:23:52,680 Just look at him, what do you see? 547 00:23:52,680 --> 00:23:54,974 Tall, skinny, 548 00:23:55,016 --> 00:23:57,560 insipid egotistical type. 549 00:23:57,602 --> 00:24:00,354 A moth-eaten German eagle wearing a monocle. 550 00:24:00,354 --> 00:24:01,647 Hogan... 551 00:24:01,689 --> 00:24:03,399 How'd you like to introduce that 552 00:24:03,441 --> 00:24:05,109 to the Fuhrer and your friends 553 00:24:05,151 --> 00:24:06,444 as your brother-in-law? 554 00:24:06,486 --> 00:24:08,029 You may have a point, Hogan. 555 00:24:08,029 --> 00:24:09,697 He was only trying to save you 556 00:24:09,739 --> 00:24:11,866 and your sister from a terrible embarrassment. 557 00:24:11,908 --> 00:24:15,453 Perhaps I will discuss this with Gertrude. 558 00:24:15,495 --> 00:24:17,121 I'll give her a little vacation, 559 00:24:17,163 --> 00:24:19,415 let her think about it. 560 00:24:19,457 --> 00:24:21,459 Command decision. 561 00:24:21,501 --> 00:24:23,669 As for you... 562 00:24:24,545 --> 00:24:26,923 Oh, well, we have enough trouble 563 00:24:26,964 --> 00:24:28,674 on the Russian front. 564 00:24:32,136 --> 00:24:35,556 Hogan, I appreciate what you did, 565 00:24:35,598 --> 00:24:37,433 but those terrible things you said... 566 00:24:37,475 --> 00:24:38,726 I can get the general back. 567 00:24:38,768 --> 00:24:40,019 Never mind, Hogan. 568 00:24:40,061 --> 00:24:42,021 You saved me from Frau Linkmaier. 569 00:24:42,063 --> 00:24:43,814 How can I ever thank you? 570 00:24:43,856 --> 00:24:45,066 Forget it. 571 00:24:45,066 --> 00:24:46,275 What good are enemies 572 00:24:46,317 --> 00:24:47,693 if you can't depend on them? 573 00:24:47,743 --> 00:24:52,293 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 38964

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