All language subtitles for Hogans Heroes s03e23 Axis Annie.eng

( theme song playing )

LeBEAU:
Signal from Kinch.

Nothing yet, Colonel.

Keep your eye
on him.

This a man or a woman
we're meeting, sir?

London said rendezvous with
a courier-- code name Blue Fox.

It could be male or female.

If he was sure
it was a woman,

he would have worn
his combat tuxedo.

Hey, LeBeau.

Boy, I'm freezing.

Didn't they tell you
this could be a chilly war?

Nobody said anything.

They just gave me
a physical.

Forget it.

All right,
spread out.

Newkirk,
over there.

Carter over there.

And remember,
when we're through,

don't leave
any footprints in the snow.

Got you.

Colonel--
alert from Kinch.

Come on.

Colonel Hogan?

Name, please.

Blue Fox.
Hogan.

Trouble?

Ja, I had to crash a checkpoint
outside Wilhelmstadt.

They're following me.

I've got a four-
or five-minute lead-- no more.

Maybe we can
slow them down a little.

No, it is better if they
think I'm working alone.

Otherwise it would
endanger the mission.

Here-- you give that
to a man named Vandermeer.

He'll be traveling
as a salesman from Holland.

He'll be staying
at the Hauserhof Hotel

in Hammelburg a few days.

Vandermeer,
Hauserhof Hotel-- got you.

Colonel, Kinch is flashing.

Another car.

All right--
good luck.

Ja, I will need it.

Au revoir, Colonel.

Boy, those Krauts
are really moving.

Oui-- don't they know
speeding is against the law?

Yeah, and there's
never a cop around when you need one.

Underground storage bunkers.

Probably a factory, too.

Look at the ventilators--
they're ground level.

Narrow-gauge tracks running
through the whole works.

And there's the clincher.

Three launching platforms.

Launching what?

This is the German rocket base
at Peenemunde.

Blimey.

Big stuff.

Hey, those
bloody rockets

are pointing straight
at England.

Oh, I hope my sister
Mavis is all right, and Stephanie.

How come the air force hasn't
knocked that thing out, Colonel?

We've tried, but too much
of it is underground.

Bombing failed, so my guess is
they'll try a commando raid.

I'm glad it's got
nothing to do with us.

I'll buy that.

Our part of the job
is to get this

to a Mr. Vandermeer
at the Hauserhof Hotel.

He'll take it from there.

KINCH:
Not this week.

Message from the
Hammelburg underground.

"Blue Fox is dead.

Shot up his car, went off
the road, died in the crash."

That's terrible.

At least they
didn't capture him.

"Gestapo moving units
into Hammelburg.

"Patrol starting.

"Investigation
must close down.

Urgent you pass word
on to London."

I couldn't make contact,
so I'll try again tonight.

Oh, great.

I was depending
on the underground

to tip us off
when Vandermeer arrived,

even watch him for awhile,
just to make sure.

Now we're really up the creek.

Colonel.

I'll take that flipping
map into Hammelburg.

There's enough Gestapo in town
for a convention-- forget it.

You wouldn't get 100
yards on the road.

We're stuck with this
until the heat's off.

Well, what about Vandermeer?

I mean, he comes to town,
we don't show up, he leaves.

There's nothing
we can do

until we get
the alternate plan from headquarters.

Problem right now is to find
a safe place to hide this.

Carter, stand up.

Take off your shirt.

Kinch, get me some tape.

Tape?

Hey, wait a minute, Colonel.

Why me?

In a crowd, Carter,

you're the one least likely
to be hiding secret papers.

I resent that.

I think... sir.

Just put it on.

It's not the going on
that bothers me.

It's when you
take it off-- that stuff hurts.

If you don't cry,

the colonel
will put you in

for a good-
conduct medal.

I already got it.

Could have
told you that.

( door slams )

Guten Tag, gentlemen.

You know if
he calls us gentlemen,

there must be
something cooking.

Formation in ten minutes.

Commandant's orders.

What for?
We just had one!

The Commandant
does not confide in me.

Very wise.

What's the matter with him?

I just took out
his appendix.

And a beautiful
job it was, too.

From his back?

Well, anybody can take
them out from the side.

I think I pulled a muscle.

Yeah-- aw...

Oh, that's...
that's terrible.

What's that?

The mustard
plaster.

Nosy today, Schultz.

That's what
they pay me for.

You call what they give you
every month pay?

Why don't you strike
for more money, Schultzy?

Don't start labor trouble
in the Luftwaffe.

Get up!

Turn around!

The other way.

Mustard plaster,
huh?

Feels like paper.

You're much too clever
actually, Schultz.

I had some secret maps
and I hid them there.

On him?

Secrets?

With that face?

( laughs heartily )

( door closes )

That Kraut's
getting out of line.

KLINK:
Report!

SCHULTZ:
All present and accounted for.

Thank you, Sergeant.

It is now indeed
my great pleasure

to introduce to you
Fraulein Anna Gebhart

of the Propaganda
Ministry.

Let's hear it
for the Fraulein, gentlemen!

( men cheering )

Your basic Germanic bird
is sometimes very attractive.

Hallo, baby!

Gebhart.

I've heard
that name before.

Read it someplace.

Gentlemen, the
Propaganda Ministry

is anxious to prove
to the world

that the Third Reich
is observing

the Geneva Prisoner of War
Convention in every respect.

( men objecting )

SCHULTZ:
Quiet!

KLINK:
Silence!

It will mean the cooler

to anyone
who does not listen.

Proceed, my dear.

Thank you.

My mission here
is to interview

as many of you
as possible,

record those interviews

and broadcast them on my
show over Radio Berlin.

LeBEAU:
You must be kidding!

I am already under contract
to His Majesty the King.

( prisoners clamoring )

Anna Gebhart--
I've got it.

That's Axis Annie.

She broadcasts
to the Allied troops.

Axis Annie--

The dame who
sells desertion?

In person--
the whole bit.

Democracy
is finished.

Give up,
save yourself.

A real morale booster.

Boy, if my back
wasn't taped,

I'd like to punch her
right in the nose.

Pass the word
along.

KLINK:
Silence.

Boy if my back
wasn't taped...

( all shushing Carter )

Now, anyone who cooperates
with Fraulein Gebhart

will be given
special privileges

including two weeks
of white bread and butter.

Commandant, Fraulein.

Speaking for my men,
we decline your generous offer.

Colonel Hogan, in this case,

it's just possible that
you do not speak for your men.

Now, anyone
who wishes to cooperate

for special privileges,
raise his hand.

( prisoners laughing )

Dummkopf.

The Gestapo--

what are they
doing here?

I know nothing--
nothing!

Dismiss your men.

Jawohl, Herr Kommandant.

Achtung!

Everybody dismissed!

Yeah, they're going
to dismiss you, Schultzy,

if you put
your hand up much more.

Have we got company.

That's the radio
detection truck.

We try to reach
London now,

they'll locate
our transmitter.

What's the score,
Colonel?

Maybe we can find out.

Kinch, is the bug working
in Klink's office?

Always.

I tested it
this morning.

He's so efficient.

I don't know why the
war is taking so long.

Come on.

And he crashed
through the barrier.

He was heading away from
the border and into Germany.

An Allied agent, Herr Major?

Or saboteur.

Our theory is that
he was part of a gang,

possibly going to rendezvous
with someone in this area.

But who?

Could be anyone,
Klink--

Farmer, townspeople.

Even one of your own guards.

My men?

Major Hochstetter, I assure you,

none of my men would be
involved in such a thing.

Not even for a bribe?

Not for all the money
in the world.

Tell me, how much do you think

they could get
for a thing like that?

This entire area
is under Gestapo control...

including your
command, Klink.

Stalag 13?

HOCHSTETTER:
Stalag 13 will be headquarters for the investigation.

Aw... they've taken
his little stalag away.

I begged him to put it
in his lawyer's name.

You will carry on as usual,

but all non-routine matters
must be referred to me.

I may proceed
with my interviews, Herr Major?

There is
your first matter to deal with.

Well, Herr Major?

Let me think about that.

Very well.

While you
are thinking,

I will call
Herr Goebbels in Berlin

and ask him
what he thinks.

There is no reason why
you can't do the interviews.

Is there, Klink?

Oh, no Goebbels
at all.

No reason.

There is no reason
why you cannot proceed.

That Axis Annie's
got guts,

I'll say that for her.

Right.

She sorted Klink
and the major out soon enough.

Doesn't help us.

Yeah, we still have
the Gestapo.

HOGAN:
Or does it?

Does it what?

Help us.

Fraulein Gebhart knows
how to push the Gestapo around.

She gets things done.

Why can't we use her

to get into town and deliver
the message to Vandermeer?

Colonel, come on.

She wants to interview us.

Klink's offering privileges.

We'll make a deal.

Tell people that the Krauts
observe the Geneva Convention?

Well, they do when
it fits in with their plans.

CARTER:
Broadcast for the enemy, Colonel?

Not bloody
likely.

( group objecting )

Those rockets
flying out of Peenemunde

are creating havoc in England.

Our orders are to get
the message through

and that's all that's important.

Well, there is one other thing
that's important.

Carter's beginning to itch.

All right, Hogan,

I'll take the names

of those men that
will cooperate now.

Well,
I don't know.

I mean, you just
don't order men

to broadcast
for the enemy.

You got to sell
them on the idea.

Now, what can I offer them?

Two weeks of
white bread and butter.

We had that
for openers, Commandant.

What do you want?

An extra hot
shower per week,

no K.P., more wood
for the stoves.

Impossible.

English
language books.

Very scarce.

So are men willing
to be interviewed.

Oh, how about a few shovels
for digging escape tunnels.

Shovels we got, but
we just struck rock.

We could use a
couple of drills.

Insolence!

There has never been
a successful escape

from Stalag 13.

So you have told me,
Herr Kommandant.

Now Hogan,
if I grant these privileges,

will your men cooperate?

Well,
I can try.

There's one
more thing, sir.

More?

Yeah, they've
been talking about

how nice
it would be

to get out of camp
for a few hours,

maybe have dinner
at some place in town.

Dinner in tow...

Hogan, may I suggest the dining
room of the Hauserhof.

It's really
a very excellent place.

Perfect-- they'd be willing
to go under guard, of course.

That's very decent of you.

Forget it!

It does seem like a lot.

Look lady,
we didn't send for you.

This is your idea-- remember?

Impossible.

The entire area is
under Gestapo control.

Colonel.

I think I could convince
Herr Goebbels.

All right.

Do I have your word
as an officer

that your men will
not try to escape?

Absolutely.

Who'd want to leave this?

It's like a country club...

with the most wonderful pro
in the world.

CARTER:
We got five of them

in the last supply drop
from London.

That thing'll
start a fire?

Oh, sure--
the hottest.

It's used in sabotage
a lot.

Ever fail?

You kidding?

Can't-- it's too simple.

It's just acid and magnesium.

You just push
these two parts...

You'd love it
if you saw it.

Anyway, the acid
ignites the magnesium

and then up she goes.

Sets fire to anything.

He really knows.

After the war,

how are they
going to keep him

down on the farm?

With fireworks
every Saturday night.

All right-- now here's
how the plan'll work.

I'll tell Klink
that three of us--

LeBeau, Newkirk and I--
will cooperate.

Kinch, you and Carter refused.

We refused?

We're the good guys
and they're the bad guys.

Oh.

They'll take us into Hammelburg
for the dinner.

We'll see that Vandermeer
gets the plans.

Axis Annie's going to make wax
recordings of the interviews.

While we're gone,
make sure to destroy them,

otherwise we're in
for a court-martial.

How do we get
at those recordings?

Follow me--
the radio detection truck

is taking its power
from Building 9,

where they've also stored
the recording equipment.

Now, see that
power line?

That's the payoff.

You notice they're
guarding the truck,

but not Building 9.

Carter, do you think
you could fix

a couple of those magnesium
pencils to attach to that cable?

Yeah,
I think so.

All right, what you'll do is

you'll approach the building
from the blind side.

You attach the pencils
to the cable

and they should slide
direct to the gas tank of the truck.

And while the Krauts
are busy with the fire,

we go for the recordings.

And I mean
go for them.

Drop an extra
pencil in there.

We destroy the recordings
and the truck

and we're back in
the communications business.

CARTER:
And then what happens

if those Gestapo guys
start shooting?

Then we're dead, right?
Then what?

At least your back
will stop itching.

Greetings, GIs.

This is your
favorite enemy,

Axis Annie,
over Radio Berlin.

I've got a very special show
for you today, fellows,

so stand by,
all you handsome losers.

I may punch her
in the nose myself.

Forget it--
we volunteered.

...those missions
against Germany.

Here's a little advice
from Axis Annie.

When you bail out, don't fight.

Play it smart-- give up.

Germany observes
the Geneva Convention.

But don't take
my word for it.

Here's our first guest--

Colonel Robert Hogan
from Bridgeport, Connecticut.

( loud clapping )

Colonel?

Colonel Hogan,
how long have you been

a prisoner of war?

A couple years.

What can you tell us about
the Luft Stalag where you are?

It's a nice place
to be captured,

but I wouldn't
want to live here.

You're joking, of course.

Yes, of course.

Actually, the commandant
of the camp

is a very intelligent man.

He does everything possible to
make it more comfortable for us.

In fact, with men like him,

I can see where you're
going to win the war.

Thank you, Colonel.

In your experience,
have the German authorities

always observed
the Geneva Convention?

Well, I admit
I was a little surprised,

but, uh, they are
fair and humane

with the prisoners at all times.

Thank you, Colonel Hogan.

Lovely food,
beautiful accommodations.

You couldn't ask
for anything better.

Well, you... or you could
ask, but it wouldn't help.

You have
any complaints?

Well, just one.

No birds.

Birds?

Uh, Frauleins.

Ladies-- you know.

Oh, yes, of course.

But if you're happy
in your stalag,

is feminine company
so important to you?

( imitating Humphrey Bogart ):
What are you doing after the broadcast, sweetheart?

Have you ever witnessed

any mistreatment
of prisoners of war?

Only once-- it happened to me.

You see, I am a cook

and I was making
a "Tournedos Rossini"

They confiscated my mushrooms.

Any reason?

Jealousy.

I would hardly call that
inhuman treatment.

You would if you were
a Frenchman.

All right, now remember,

wait about two hours
after we're gone

before you make your move.

One more thing.

LeBeau? The door.

Right, Colonel.

All right, Carter--

the moment
of truth has arrived.

The envelope,
please.

Yes, sir.

I've been dreading this.

Let me know--
fast or slow?

I don't know, sir.

You know, they say that
doing it fast is better,

but I'm not so sure.

Kinch, what do you think?

Oh, it's a toss up, really.

You know, sir,

I think the shock
of going slowly would...

You got it!

Speedy Gonzalez.

Boy, you can
hide stuff on my back anytime.

All right-- next time
we'll steal a tank.

All right, that's
"Vandermeer, Hauserhof Hotel."

LeBEAU:
Attention-- Schultz.

SCHULTZ:
Colonel Hogan.

I have orders to take you,
the Englander

and that little one
to Major Hochstetter.

The car is waiting outside.

And... no monkey business.

CARTER:
Good-bye.

HOGAN:
Okay.

Good luck.

Wait a minute.

You say good luck
to them

just for
one night's sleep?

Schultz, we're trying to
make it a friendly war.

Heraus!

Good luck.

Thanks.

( soft dance music playing )

I have ordered
an absolutely marvelous dinner

and I know
we'll all enjoy it.

You're one of
the great

party givers,
Commandant.

Thank you, Colonel Hogan.

I disapprove of
this sort of fraternization.

We do too, sir.

HOCHSTETTER:
Silence.

And I'm against
this bargain with prisoners.

You didn't
have to come here.

They are well guarded.

I trust no one.

You have your records.

Is this party necessary,
or this a matter of honor?

Oh, honor?

Don't be silly.

A few photographs

of prisoners
enjoying themselves

and then you can do
whatever you want with them.

Or would you prefer
to discuss propaganda with Herr Goebbels?

No, no,
it's an excellent idea.

KLINK:
Now, we shall all have a wonderful time, yes?

GEBHART:
How about a few pictures, huh?

Pictures--
oh, that's a marvelous...

Let me sit over here.

Now, come on--
look happy.

Just a moment,
I'm not ready.

There we go.

How's that?

Very nice.

Isn't this exciting?

I'd like a dozen
8 x 10s of those.

( laughing heartily )

Gentlemen.

Fraulein.

To Stalag 13.

To Stalag 13!

GUARD:
Feuer!

Feuer!

( guards shouting )

( fire alarm begins wailing )

Boy, that's a great fire.

Should have brought
those marshmallows.

Let's get
the recordings.

Get another one of
those goodies ready.

( guards shouting instructions
in German )

( glass shatters )

( fire alarm wailing )

LeBEAU:
Some more wine, Colonel.

SCHULTZ:
More wine!

Klink, you're making
a fool of yourself.

Let's start the party.

Right.

Fraulein, why don't you
take a picture

of our French chef preparing a
flaming dish for the commandant?

For me?

Ah, charming idea.

KLINK:
Marvelous-- let's have another picture.

NEWKIRK:
You'll love this, sir.

KLINK:
Thank you, thank you.

Schultz loves
my cherries jubilee.

SCHULTZ:
Don't forget the schnapps.

This will be
a marvelous dish.

Lots of schnapps.

Ja, ja, ja,
ja, ja.

Lots of schnapps.

LeBeau, aren't you pouring
a little bit too much brandy?

Oh, no, no, no--
it's an old recipe

my grandfather taught me.

LeBEAU:
And now for the big moment.

( Schultz and others
exclaiming )

Ah, beautiful!

Excuse me, Fraulein.

May I have this dance?

Fraulein?

Oh, last time
you were a Fraulein,

Hitler was a corporal.

( disagreeing
politely )

Hey, hey, I asked her to dance,
mate, not you.

What is...?

Schultz, bring
the guard.

Get that man...

( people screaming "Fire!" )

Fire!

SCHULTZ:
Feuer!

Alert the guards
right now!

Fire!

There's a fire.
Call the guards!

SCHULTZ:
There's a fire!

Put out
the fire.

Put out the fire.

( everybody yelling at once )

NEWKIRK:
Oh, blimey.

It's just like London.

Fire!

It's a diversion.

They're trying
to escape.

Use your guns.

Use your gun!

No! Someone
could get hurt.

No, don't use
your gun.

Fire.

Get in there and help.

Schnell!

Herr Vandermeer's
room.

Vandermeer.

Danke.

Fire.

Vandermeer, don't talk, listen.

I have a letter from
a friend of yours, Blue Fox.

I'll leave it in your mailbox.

What's the number?

Twenty-eight.

Right.

And good luck.

What are doing
on the telephone?

Yes, a riot and a fire
at the Hauserhof Hotel.

And hurry.

Just calling the police.

Obviously the Gestapo
can't cope with this.

Let me see about that.

KLINK:
Hogan!

It's a great party, Commandant.

In fact, I have an idea.

What, what, what?

Why don't we
all get together

and do this again
next year.

KLINK:
Ja.

Ja.

Mm-hmm.

Ja, ja.

I'm checking out.

Vandermeer.

Room 28.

The fire spread
to Building 9?

What?
All of them?

Anyone hurt?

I understand.

Yes, make a count
of all the prisoners.

Oh, there's
a letter in my mailbox.

May I have
it, please?

I will get there
in a few minutes.

When I do, all guards
on standby alert.

Good night.

Oh, pardon me.

Oh, I beg
your pardon.

I believe you
dropped this letter.

Thank you,
thank you so much.

Good night.

My pleasure.

Hogan, the fire
at Stalag 13 is out.

Apparently it started
in the radio detection truck

and spread to Building 9.

The truck and all
the records are destroyed.

Oh, what a shame.

Want us to do
the interviews again?

Oh, what would you like
in exchange?

We're running out of hotels.

How about a nice sit-down
dinner at Berchtesgaden.

Forget it.

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