All language subtitles for Berlin.2023.S01E01.srt - eng(4)

[melancholic strings rise]

[mournful melody building]

[footfalls echoing]

- Everything you asked for is there.
- [woman] Thank you.

[kisses]

[thunder rumbling in distance]

- [rain pattering]
- [somber orchestral music swells]

[Berlin] There are really only two things
that can turn a bad day into a great one.

[engine starts]

The first thing is love.

But to be honest, that's not for today.

[thunder crashes]

- You see, my third wife just dumped me.
- [music ends]

- [siren wails]
- [brakes screech]

The second thing
is a heist worth millions of euros.

But that's another story.

Today is a small step in a grander scheme.

This was gonna be easy.

But if it's a bad day, you might be forced
to put some guy on his knees,

ready to shoot the poor bastard
in the head.

[energetic rock music playing]

[tires squeal]

This is my crew.

One of only three I've worked with
in my life.

But this crew is special
because it goes back to my golden age.

Before I knew anything about my illness.

Before I was locked up
like a rat in the Royal Mint,

my life hanging from a thread.

♪ We're holding out for a better play... ♪

[Berlin] This is Keila.

She graduated cum laude
from her university

and is an expert
in electronic engineering.

There's only one thing
bigger than her brain,

and that's her pathological shyness.

Roi.

He has a real talent for opening locks
and for getting locked up.

Hey! Don't touch me, pig!

He hated his previous life so much that
he found in me the father he never had.

And I found in him a loyal dog
you take out for walks.

It was meant to be.

Damián.

A moonlighter.

University professor by day,

criminal mastermind by night.

And, like all geniuses,
he's a little absent-minded.

Bruce.

He's our jack-of-all-trades.

He can handle anything.

Weapons, heavy-duty machinery,
thermal lasers.

I bet you're thinking,
"This guy isn't playing with a full deck."

[group cheering]

Think again.

♪ I tried to tell ya ♪

♪ Watch out ♪

- ♪ Here comes trouble ♪
- [song ends]

[light chatter]

[woman] Who are they?

- I've never seen--
- Thank you.

We're looking for... a Mr. Antonio Vals.

[tense music playing]

[takes a deep breath] Yes, sir?

I have a warrant to search the premises.
Would you come with me, sir?

[dinner guests murmuring]

What exactly am I being charged with?

Expropriation of national treasures,
illegal trafficking of antiquities,

fraud and embezzlement.

You're facing charges that could lead you
to over nine years in prison, Mr. Vals.

- I'm frightened.
- They're not real police.

Nah. The way they act...

Open this door, please.

[keypad beeps]

- [mechanism chimes]
- [door unlocks]

[hinges squeak]

[bright orchestral music swells]

[case alarms beeping]

And open that cabinet.

Excuse me, miss.

Yes, you. You're not a cop, right?

[tense, rhythmic music playing]

None of you.

So, what's going on?

This is bullshit.

What the hell is going on here?

- [reader chimes]
- [lock clicks]

I bet you're imagining yourself in prison,

teaching your cellmates
about Etruscan art,

clutching a tiny bar of soap.

[chuckles softly]

I have some good news for you, Mr. Vals.
I'm not with the police.

But in exchange for not reporting you,
I will relieve you of this cup.

[softly] This'll be our little secret.

- I demand to speak with your superiors.
- Sit.

Don't you dare touch me!

I want your name and your badge number.
Who's in charge here?

Who's making all this ruckus?

Ah. That's me.

- [sighs]
- What are you doing here?

You've absolutely no right to be here.

You know Inspector Morán?
He's a good friend of mine.

[Berlin] Very well.

Why don't you take out your phone?
Let's call together.

We'll put it on speaker.

Okay.

Hands-free. On the table, please.

- [chuckles] Okay.
- Let me unlock it.

Hm.

[shocked gasps]

Nobody.

Not even a signal.

You wanted my name
and badge number, right?

[phone clatters]

[Berlin] My name is Beretta.
Nine millimeter.

And my badge number is...
Parabellum, eight-bullet magazine.

Will you require
further proof of identity?

No. No, sir. That won't be necessary.

[tense music building]

- [tense music subsides]
- [Berlin sighs]

Graveyards around the world
are filled with poor bastards

who picked the wrong day to play hero.

But in case one of you should feel

the urge to report
on your dining experience,

please provide us
with your ID cards so we can find you.

Now.

Hm. You're coming with us, sir.

[tense music swells]

This is when your head will start to spin.

[guest] No! Please!

Can you feel it?
Do you feel that knot in your stomach?

The dry mouth?

Yes.

You should have thought about that
before talking shit and playing the hero.

All that for who? Your wife?

- [crying] No!
- [Berlin] No? Then it's your...

Your girlfriend?

I didn't mean to raise my voice.
I'm sorry. I just got nervous.

- I swear.
- How long have you been seeing her?

Just a few months.

Do you have any idea
what you've just done?

No.

Therein lies the beauty of love.

It brings out the best in all of us.

Even a wretch like you,
down on his knees, begging for mercy,

while just moments ago, you played hero.

[whimpers]

Listen to me.

Love disappears, idiot!

[dramatic orchestral music playing]

Love is not forever.

You shouldn't throw away your life
for love.

[guest shuddering]

- [doors close]
- [sobs]

[whimpers]

- [music fades]
- ["Bullets and Flowers" playing]

♪ True love and flowers ♪

♪ Bullets instead ♪

♪ Breaking through my chest ♪

♪ Would you ever cry for me? ♪

♪ There is no other way ♪

♪ There is nothing I can say ♪

♪ Gonna pray for all I did ♪

♪ I will beg down on my knees ♪

♪ Never knew to draw the line ♪

♪ Too many troubles on my mind ♪

♪ No regret that I can give ♪

♪ But someday I will forgive ♪

♪ Myself ♪

[theme song fades]

[upbeat, energetic rock music playing]

[rock music cuts out]

[soprano singing aria on radio]

We have a new girl on the team.

[woman sighs]

You said we'd be five. What can she do?
Sorry, what can you do?

[Berlin] Nothing.
She's here to observe and keep silent.

Think of her as a thief in training.

Her name is...

What is that name that you chose?

- Cameron.
- [Berlin] Cameron.

She drives on the edge.

She lives on the edge,
and she's pure adrenaline.

But that's not the reason
she's here with us.

She's here because of something
much more painful.

Cameron, why don't you go and take
a seat with your new colleagues?

I'm sure you're all wondering,
what are we doing here in Paris?

[muffled] What could bring us all together
in this luxurious hotel?

- [aria intensifies]
- [background sounds fade away]

[aria continues on radio]

[takes a deep breath, scoffs]

Well, we are, in fact,
here to study our next heist.

A heist that will confound all of Europe.

Everything started ten days ago,
when we stole this,

a magnificent fourth century chalice.

An exquisite example of French sacred art.
And it's worth 40,000 euros.

Which we will transform into 44 million.

Damián?

[Damián grunts, panting]

[energetic music playing]

This is simply a key for us
to steal 44 million euros in jewels.

Welcome to our magic show.

How to transform a chalice into 63 jewels
from the royal families of Europe.

Jewels that are scattered
across 34 cities.

Zurich, Vienna, Milan, Saint Petersburg.

Well, that's gonna take a lot of time
to steal from 34 cities.

Our show is for one night only.

[Damián] But, before we start,
first, we need to age this bronze relic

with some ammonium chloride.

[liquid bubbling]

[energetic music builds to a crescendo]

[music fades]

[in French] Father Toureaux,
I'm Professor Santana

from the Polytechnic University
of Salamanca.

Professor Vázquez,
expert in French sacred art.

The rest are in charge
of GPR and excavations.

[in English] I am very pleased
to meet everyone.

- You speak perfect English.
- My mother was born in England.

- How wonderful.
- And I know who you are.

- [Berlin] Hmm!
- I looked you up on the internet. [laughs]

[Keila] When he looks us up online,

he'll find more than 650 references
about us that I planted on the web.

Excavations, publications
in scientific journals,

archeological finds, and awards.

Would you please follow me?

We'd love to.

[Toureaux, in French] Good morning, guys.
You're doing a fantastic job.

[in English] Excuse me,

but could you give us
a moment alone, please?

We help ex-convicts
reintegrate in society.

These men are on a day-release program.

Here, we offer them employment.

It's a chance for them to be successful
in their rehabilitation.

[ominous music playing]

- Admirable work, Father.
- So true. And very pious as well.

In the archives
of the Cathedral of Santiago,

we recently discovered
documented references

to an ancient church
located in this very same spot.

And here we have references
to testimony from pilgrims

that also appear
in this Benedictine codex.

With all this Latin shit
and history, he'll be so overwhelmed,

he won't have time to think.

And also in this codex from the College
of Saint-Martin-des-Champs.

And here where it says,
"Agnus Dei, qui tollis peccata mundi."

[uplifting orchestral music playing]

I'm afraid I don't understand.

This codex is from the fifth century.

But you see,
my church was built much later. In 1240.

If our calculations are correct,
then the oldest church

in Paris would no longer be
the Abbey of Saint-Germain-des-Prés.

But this church below.

[Berlin] And what happens
to a man of the cloth,

who is so completely
in love with his church

when he learns that he has
a priceless treasure right under his feet?

He gets horny like a bitch in heat.

[laughs]

[uplifting orchestral music continues]

Maybe we can all go down
to the crypt together. Hmm?

We can take a look around,
seeing as you are all here.

[GPR beeps]

[steady beeping]

[beeping grows faster]

[Keila] Wait.

[rapid beeping]

The GPR has detected a foundation.

The GPR has one significant advantage.

No matter how hard you look,
nobody understands a damn thing.

About five meters below.

And Father Toureaux will be there,
watching, looking for clues,

trying to grasp what's happening.

And he will see that glimmer
in our eyes, that ripple of emotion.

And he will understand
that he is witnessing history.

Definitely stonework.

- This could be a Roman arch.
- [gasps]

And just as his climax
of anticipation approaches...

- [mimics explosion]
- [music stops]

...we pop his balloon.

I'm not sure.

Uh, not sure about what?

[Damián] Just because
the radar detected stonework

doesn't mean we've discovered an edifice.

We'll need to gather more evidence
before excavating.

[Berlin] Toureaux has to have
absolute faith and trust in us.

Because we can't set up
a fake archeological dig

just because the priest is horny.

For that, we'll need
something more tangible.

[rhythmic music playing]

And why do we wanna set up
a fake archeological dig in this crypt?

'Cause...

this crypt actually has a secret passage
to the catacombs of Paris.

Twenty meters underground
runs 300 kilometers of tunnels

that gives us access to the entire city.

What we want...

is to follow the tunnels all the way to...

here.

Forty-five meters from the crypt.

Exactly where all the royal families

of Europe will have deposited
their jewels.

So that Uncle Berlin
can make a withdrawal.

What's there? Some kind of bank vault?

- A museum?
- [Berlin] No...

The biggest and most prestigious
auction house in Paris.

[Bruce] Mm.

- We do have a problem, though.
- Oh.

A problem?

They're not deposited at the same time.

In fact, they'll arrive little by little
from 34 different cities.

[Bruce] I don't get it.

How are we supposed to swipe them
all in one night?

By learning the date of the last shipment.

And that's why we are staying here,
in this hotel.

Across the street lives Monsieur Polignac,
director of the auction house.

He's the only one who knows
the exact time of deposit.

[rhythmic music ends]

[Cameron] A different hairstyle?

- [Keila] It's fine.
- [Cameron] You sure?

Yes. [coughs]

Do we have to dress
like we're going to a wedding?

Keila.

Thieves have this ridiculous habit

of either dressing like thieves
or dressing too casually.

Like those people
who wear tracksuits when they travel.

But, if you intend
to break into an apartment

in a very chic part of Paris,

then you better dress accordingly.

Wouldn't you agree?

[Damián] And with this fabulous cake,
who would ever think you were thieves? Hm?

[whistling nonchalantly]

[Cameron] You look fine Keila.
It's really pretty.

- [Keila] I'm not sure...
- Listen, Roi.

I want to advise you that, even in love,
there are lines that you cannot cross.

I happened to notice
that you've been making eyes at Cameron.

No. I walked away.

In actual fact,
she was the one looking at me.

She looks at you, you walk away.
You've understood things perfectly Roi.

Hmm.

[sighs] That young lady
has a troubled past,

but I'm afraid
this is not the time to get into that.

All I can say for the moment is that
she's been in a mental institution.

Considering I am not
father figure material,

I'm asking you.

I want you to keep an eye on her.

On her, not her tattoos.

[through gritted teeth] And I must insist
your relationship stays platonic.

[gently] Have I made myself clear, Roi?

[tense music pulsing]

Yes, sir.

[softly] That's settled, then.

[Damián] Ready, everyone.

All right. They've just left the house.
Time to move.

[Damián on radio] Bruce, follow them
in case they double back.

- [indistinct chatter]
- [Damián] Relax. You look way too stiff.

You're on the way
to a friend's party, not to a funeral.

You're too close to me.
I can't reach the lock.

I have to. People are watching us.

[lock rattling]

[quietly] I can't do it.

[grunts]

I'm trying to get a small key
into a really small hole.

What the .... you doing?

Can you get it in now?

- [lock clicks open]
- Door's open.

Keila, your turn. Go.

[both speaking French]

- Bonjour.
- [Keila] Bonjour.

Roi, check the stairs.

[Roi] There are three locks in the door.

[high-pitched beep]

[drill whirs]

Careful. Neighbor in the building.

[elevator clangs]

- Hurry up.
- [Keila] Here.

[drill whirs]

- Ready.
- [lock clicks open]

One down.

[tense music continues]

[board beeping]

[tablet chimes]

[beeping continues]

- [lock clicks open]
- Two down.

Cameron.

[tablet humming]

[chimes]

- [chimes]
- Six, five, seven, eight.

- [lock clicks]
- We're in.

[alarm system beeping]

[alarm deactivates]

[tense music subsides]

[locks click closed]

[low growl]

[growls impatiently, barks]

[barking excitedly]

[drill whirring]

Are you getting this?

[Damián] Got it.

[Cameron] And now? Can you see me?

Got you.

Okay.

[drill whirring]

[barks]

[yips]

[monitor chimes]

[monitor chimes]

[drill whirring]

[device whirs]

[eager woof]

[yips]

[barks insistently]

[excited barking continues]

[camera whirs]

[monitor chimes]

All cameras are active. Time to get out.

Time to go.

- [keys jangling outside]
- [tense music plays]

[click echoes]

Quick! Hide!

Shit! Someone's coming.

[quietly] There.

Keila, the alarm.

- [panel chimes]
- [lock clicks]

[tense music swells]

[dogs barking]

[alarm system beeping]

[dog walker] Quentin?

[alarm deactivates]

[dog walker] Come on, Milo.
Let's go find Quentin.

Quentin?

Quentin! Where are you?

Quentin?

- [whimpers]
- [dog walker] Quentin.

Quentin!

Shh.

- Quentin!
- [basset hound sniffing]

[Quentin growls]

[gasps softly]

[growls]

Come here.

[fabric straining]

Quentin, fetch!

- Shh.
- [Quentin yips]

[dog walker] Here you are. Hey, naughty.

Do you wanna play?

Come on.

Let's go. Milo.

[soft growl]

- [Roi] Shoo! Shoo!
- [dog walker] Come here. Milo, come here!

[Milo growls]

Come here. Come on. We gotta go.

Come here. Come on, Milo. Let's go.

Come here.

Come on. Come on.

[tense music swells]

[breathing shakily]

[alarm activates]

[dogs barking excitedly]

- [Damián] He's gone.
- [communicator beeps]

[alarm system beeping]

[alarm deactivates]

[sighs deeply]

[exhales]

Where'd you get
those boots, d'Artagnan? [chuckles]

[upbeat, funky music playing]

[Berlin] Okay. He's left the building.

You can go now.

[elevator bell dings]

[funky music fades]

- Can we talk?
- Come on in.

I'd rather stay here. Thanks.

- [indie pop on radio]
- Suit yourself.

I wanted to talk earlier,
but they were listening.

Anyway, when I was picking that lock
and you grabbed my ass,

in my opinion, you crossed the line.

And please, don't take this personally,
but I'd prefer to keep our relationship

professional.

It was professional.

I was helping you open the door.

But no worries, I understand.

Au revoir.

Well, I also caught you watching me
while I was getting dressed.

That was kinda weird.

- Hmm?
- Nothing personal.

I was just stimulating my imagination.

When I wake up alone at night,

I masturbate.

It really helps me get to sleep.

There are pills for that, you know?

Oh yeah?

For the insomnia, of course.

Yeah. Of course, my insomnia.

Any other ideas?

I don't want there to be any confusion.

Confusion about what?

Our relationship.
About what happened today.

Imaginary, professional, or otherwise.

Got it.

Would you like to know
about my first relationship?

It was my only one.

And since then, all that interests me

when I'm with a guy
is his expiration date.

Here, in capital letters. October 25th.

So don't worry, Roi.
There's no risk of any confusion. [laughs]

We're all clear, then.

Crystal clear.

Off you go. Time for your warm milk.

You look so cute
in those glasses, Harry Potter.

[chuckles] These are fake lenses.

I wear them because they're cool.

- They're a gift from Berlin.
- Ah, Berlin.

We've been friends for a long time.

- I'm what you would call his lieutenant.
- And do you always do what you're told?

I suppose he told you
to come see me tonight.

Very obedient, aren't you?

Yes, he asked me to come here.

In fact, he ordered me to babysit you.

From what I hear,
it appears you have a screw loose.

[chuckles softly]

So I would suggest that you behave.

Or no warm milk for you.

[indie pop continues]

- [elevator bell dings]
- Good night, Mr. Lieutenant.

- ♪ I shot the sheriff ♪
- [elevator bell dings]

♪ He stole my car, he stole my time ♪

♪ I shot the sheriff ♪

♪ He stole my car, he stole my time ♪

♪ He was all I had ♪

♪ I shoulder the blame ♪

[indie pop song ends]

[loud whirring]

Anything new?

[Damián] No, they're asleep.
What are you doing up?

[Berlin] Hm. Nothing. I couldn't sleep.

Have you heard from her?

I have her lawyer's address
and her bank account.

[both chuckle]

I guess a third divorce
is harder than the first.

But you have to stay positive.

Maybe it's just
that you weren't meant for one another.

I've been with my wife for 24 years.

But before I met her,
I had two bad affairs.

- Finding the love of your life takes time.
- No, Damián. I have to stop you there.

The love of your life is a fairy tale!

I'm sorry to be the one to tell you,
but... love just fades away.

The only thing
worthwhile is the beginning.

That's the best part about love.

When every song
you hear reminds you of her.

When you're having a meal together,
and all you do is talk.

When everything she says
makes you laugh. [chuckles softly]

Mm-mm. No, no, no.

Love is precisely
what comes after all that.

When the spell is over.

Then, during dinner,
you're happy to be quiet

because you're at peace.

To love someone,
you must really know them.

How can you love someone you don't know?

I guess I didn't know her that well, then.

- [chuckles]
- Hm.

But you know,
even if my third marriage fell to pieces,

that's not really what bothers me.

I was looking forward to Paris
and enjoying life as a bachelor, and then...

[tender piano music playing]

And then I realized
that being alone is just sad.

Waking up alone in bed is sad.

You have nothing to do
and... no one... to care for.

No one... to think about.

No one to haunt you.

You see, it's falling in love.

[chuckles softly]

That's what I miss.

Go get some sleep, Damián. I'll stay here.

I'll just lie down
on your bed for a while.

My bed? What do you mean,
you'll lie on my bed?

- Why not?
- Think about it.

The body is constantly secreting toxins.

Sweat. Dead skin.

- Body oils and odors and earwax.
- Shit.

I didn't know you were that sensitive.

What're you thinking?
We'll roll in each other's secretions

in a five-star hotel? No.

Whatever. I'll take a nap
and come back later.

[door closes]

[woman sighs on monitor]

[monitor chimes]

[stirring instrumental music playing]

[camera whirring]

["Pasión" playing]

[lighter clicks]

[woman] Bonsoir!

- [tango ends]
- [band playing jazz version of "Demons"]

♪ Beast inside ♪

♪ There's nowhere we can hide ♪

♪ No matter what we breed ♪

♪ We still are made of greed ♪

♪ This is my kingdom come ♪

♪ When you feel my heat ♪

♪ Look into my eyes ♪

♪ It's where my demons hide ♪

♪ Don't get too close ♪

♪ It's dark inside ♪

♪ It's where my demons hide ♪

- ♪ It's where my demons hide ♪
- [group laughs]

- [song ends]
- [crowd cheers and whistles]

And now, I'd like you
to hear my friend sing.

Camille.

No. I can't. No!

[in French] Pass her the guitar.

[singing "L'amour" by Carla Bruni]

[singing gentle melody in French]

[Quentin whines]

[Quentin whimpers]

[panting]

[laughs] That's my dog.

- [song ends]
- [Camille chuckles]

[audience cheers and applauds]

- [excited chatter]
- [rock music playing inside]

[group speaking French]

[Camille] Yes, of course! Yes!

[speaking indistinctly]

[bright music playing]

[women giggling]

[sighs deeply]

[Berlin] And then, suddenly,

after so many sleepless nights,

- I slept.
- [music fades]

[tense music playing]

Let's pack it in tight.

I got it.
Do you mind getting me the mallet, please?

[whimsical music playing]

What are you doing?

Nothing. [sighs]

I saw you.

Yeah? So what?
You don't like it when I look?

Of course not. Actually, I find it gross.

I like it when people look at me.

Like, when I take my shirt off
at the beach.

What's the matter with that?

You know what's gross?

You take your shirt off,
and a big fat beer belly flops out.

[both laugh]

I'll let you in on a little secret.

Before I go to the beach,
I spread oil all over my body.

So when I take my shirt off,
my chest is nice and shiny. [chuckles]

Wow. I guess the ladies like that?

I don't get it. You don't like to ....?

What?

You talk about it like it's all a game.

Like playing golf or tennis.

Well, it's simple.

You see, either you love it, or you don't.

Me, I really like to .....

Especially the first time, you know,

when you discover those hidden secrets,
those little details.

What do you mean by little details?

Hmm. Well, when you meet
for the first time,

naturally, you imagine things.

And then when you're together,
you discover the color of her toenails,

the color of her panties,
if she shaves her .....

You do realize that people
like you are extinct, don't you?

You realize that nobody makes
jokes or talks like that anymore?

You... you can't say,
''I'd love to get a piece of that ass.''

- You know that?
- That's okay.

I won't say another word, then. Done.

[sighs]

This looks pretty good.

Have you ever thought about me like that?

Well, like I said, every time
I see a woman, I imagine things.

And... [clears throat]
...what did you imagine about me?

White cotton panties,

a well-groomed, hairy ....,
and no polish.

You've said enough.

But you asked me.
Did I say something wrong?

A big bush looks great. [laughs]

- I like big bush too.
- You're always going on about it.

Sex and stuff and panties and .....

This will never work.
You're too shallow. Helmet on.

[footsteps approaching]

- Have you buried it?
- [Keila] Yes.

[Damián] Good.

Roi, Cameron, mark out the area
so it looks like we were digging here.

[energetic music playing]

Good morning, everyone!

Damián, come here.

It's midday. Where the hell have you been?

Yeah. I know.
I'm sorry. I overslept a little.

Last night, I met someone.

- Uh-huh.
- I met her in a bar full of smoke.

With people who partied all night long.
She got up and sang on stage.

With her dog.

And all I wanted to do was to stay there
all night and be the dog!

- Mm-hmm.
- Hey. I have a favor to ask you.

- Come with me.
- Come with you?

Yeah. I need you to talk to her.

I mean, Damián, remember that feeling
when you're completely fascinated

and you wanna know everything?

Who she is? How she talks?

The way she laughed.

Damián, you should've seen her laugh.

She was radiant. [chuckles]

So, late last night,
I came back, but you weren't there.

And the lady of the house
wasn't there either.

Nowhere to be seen.

So, I was wondering.
I know this might seem crazy.

But by any chance is the wonderful woman
you mentioned Polignac's wife?

You're absolutely right.

But what does that
got to do with anything?

Together, we've just created
a beautiful fake archeological dig.

And we're going to fill
this guy's basement with wooden beams,

massive jackhammers, and hydraulics.

And you want me to have a ....in' coffee

with the wife
of the man we're going to rob?

You're right.

I wanted so badly to meet someone
that I forgot about the plan.

And I put everyone in danger.

Andrés, listen. You know there
are billions of women on planet earth.

Don't go and complicate things

with the wife
of the man we're going to rob.

[Keila] Psst!

The priest is back.

[tense music playing]

[detector crackles, whirring]

Professor, I found something.

The signal's really strong.

It looks like bronze.

It's a chalice.

That looks Byzantine to me.
Don't you think?

[Berlin] Father, we'll need
more time for the excavation.

I'd say about... three weeks. And equipment.

I'll apply immediately
for parking authorization for the trucks.

[whimsical music playing]

[music fades]

Can you tell me what we're doing here?

Roi, have you ever... encountered someone
in the subway or the train,

and you feel compelled
to know more about them?

Definitely.

Well, that's exactly
what happened to me last night.

In that bar.

So I'm waiting here,
hoping she'll come back

so I can speak with her.

Just two minutes.

Two brief minutes.

[chuckles] What use is two minutes?
You need an hour.

Have coffee, get to know her.

Two minutes. That's exactly what I need.

When you're fascinated
by a woman, pfft, you become obsessed.

And when you're obsessed, you're screwed.

You become vulnerable.

You become just another one
of those creepy morons

who hit on her every night.

Trying to make her laugh,
begging her for a date.

- And I am not going to be one of them.
- So what are you gonna do?

You follow military tactics.

Scout the area, advance, and strike.

Then, retreat.

You get close to her,
have some small talk,

and then you withdraw.

I want her to be suitably impressed
and to appreciate the fact

that I'm the first man
who hasn't tried to make love to her.

- [both chuckle]
- Not a bad tactic.

[whispering] Oh! Speak of the devil.

[gasps] Roi, you come in

and greet me like a friend
who hasn't seen me in a long time.

Two minutes, okay? Two minutes, that's it.

Shit! The book. Quick.

This is gonna be perfect.

[chuckles]

[Camille, in French] Thank you, Bastian.

[Bastian] Would you like
a croissant and orange juice?

- Yes, please.
- You got it.

Thank you.

- Good morning.
- [Berlin] Morning.

- [Bastian] What would you like?
- Café au lait, please.

- [Bastian] Okay.
- Thanks.

[instrumental music playing on stereo]

Excuse me. Uh, are you Camille?

Yes. Have we met?

No. No, no. [chuckles] No.

- Merci.
- I'm in Paris on vacation.

Uh, my name is Simón.

Uh, last night I had the pleasure
of hearing you sing.

Ooh. I was impressed.

[both chuckle]

- [in English] I speak English.
- Oh.

- It's my first language.
- [chuckles]

Camila.

Well, here in Paris, they call me Camille.

- I've been here for eight years now.
- Ah.

- Ah.
- Thank you for what you said earlier.

Mm. I'm not much of a singer, though.

[both chuckle]

ABOUT PARADISE, CHARLES DUPOND

Are you reading Dupond?

Don't tell me you like Dupond.

- Merci.
- He takes himself too seriously. [laughs]

- You mean he's tedious.
- [both laugh]

- True.
- I know.

I keep trying to finish it,
but if I'm lucky maybe I'll lose it.

Last night, you should've said hello.

No, no. I didn't wanna bother you.

Uh... last night, I was sitting there.

I was thinking to myself
and wondering about,

"What kind of music is on her playlist?"

And I came up with 20,
maybe 30 songs I think you'd like.

I'm not a fan of Spotify.
Me... [sighs] I prefer vinyl.

So, let's see if you guess correctly.

Okay. I'll give you two artists.

And if I guess correctly, you have
to take me somewhere... extraordinary.

Under V...

Vanessa Paradis

And Vinicius de Moraes.

- [gasps] Wow! I'm impressed.
- Ah.

[both laugh]

And you don't have to worry
about our little bet.

You see, I'm actually here to meet
a friend I haven't seen in a long time.

Wow! Speak of the devil.

[exhales, chuckles]

[laughs]

[Berlin] Long time no see.
How've you been?

- It's so good to see you.
- Yeah. Mm.

- How are you?
- Uh, fine. Thanks.

Um... [laughs]

It was nice to meet you.

I hope I have another opportunity
to come see you sing again.

- Hm.
- Hopefully.

Enchantée.

- Enchanté.
- Well, enjoy Paris.

Thank you. J'adore Paris.

- Mm.
- Au revoir.

Au revoir.

- Bye.
- Au revoir.

[quietly] Slowly. Not too fast.
Nice and easy.

We're gonna take a seat over here.

Right next to the exit,
and we observe as Cupid does his magic.

[both chuckle]

- And how will we know it's working?
- It'll be something discreet.

Maybe she'll look at us
or smile on her way out.

I'll know my tactics worked.

- [chuckles]
- Hey kid! Stop staring.

Tell me something quick.

How's your grandmother?

My granny?

Here she comes. C'mon.

- Start talking. Anything.
- Um... Yeah. Gran. Yeah.

- She's on her own.
- I see. Yeah.

Uh, we try to go visit her,
but it's not easy, you know?

[bell chimes]

[quietly] What the ....?

What happened?

She didn't even look at me.

Maybe. I mean, you probably noticed,
but that lady is Polignac's wife.

She's married.

So, maybe that...

No. No!

Maybe I played too hard to get.

Or I didn't fall head over heels
for her like all the other men.

Maybe she misunderstood
and she thinks that I'm gay or something.

I mean, she saw you come through the door.

The way you looked at me,
it was like you'd seen Madonna.

You said we were best friends
and that we hadn't seen each other, so...

And what's with the three kisses?
What were you doing?

- That's how they do it in France.
- And are any of us French?

You know, it's kinda .... weird

that two straight men
start kissing each other!

- Yeah.
- We've planted plutonium.

We've just destroyed this relationship.

[in French] Sir, you left your book
at the bar.

[Berlin] Hmm.

[in English] And now she thinks
I like Dupond.

[loud whirring]

[tense music playing]

Cameron, start putting down
the glow sticks.

Some people have never made it outta here.

[device beeping]

REMAINS FROM THE HOLY INNOCENTS' CEMETERY
DEPOSITED IN APRIL 1786

[tense music swells]

[Damián] This way.

That way?

[Damián] No.

That way.

[tense music continues]

It is... exactly... here.

We will dig a 14-meter tunnel
at a 27-degree angle.

This'll give us direct access
to the retaining wall

in the basement of the auction house.

[energetic rock music playing]

You have to drill
exactly where the laser's pointing.

[machinery whirring]

[rock music fades]

- [line ringing]
- [man] Yeah?

[Camille] Darling, I'm running late.

Can you grab my clothes
and bring them down, please?

We're late for the concert.

[Polignac] What concert?

[Camille] The Ópera.
We talked about it a few days ago.

[Polignac] Camille, I'm sorry.

I forgot all about it. I've got a dinner
at the Italian embassy in 30 minutes.

I told you it was important to me.
My friends are performing.

Game on! They're having an argument.

He forgot about the opera.
She's pretty pissed.

[Camille] I never ask you for anything.

It's always what you want.

C'mon, Camille.
I can't change this at the last moment.

You should've reminded me this morning.

[sighs] So that's it?

What? You don't care
what's important to me?

Just forget it. I'll go on my own. [sighs]

This guy forgets
what's important to her? You, mm... idiot.

[Roi chuckles]

[energetic music playing]

Find my tux. I need my tuxedo!

Wait. Where are you going?

To the opera!

Go downstairs and polish my shoes.

Hurry.

[engine running]

[music fades]

[Toureaux] Professor Vázquez?

Over here, Father.

God bless the work of your hands.

I've brought you some food
and some refreshments. [laughs]

Father, there was no need for that.

My pleasure.

In fact, I have a small favor to ask you.

Would you mind if I borrow the chalice?

[Damián] Um... the chalice?

What for?

Well, you see,
I'm taking a small trip back to Spain,

and I was looking forward
to visiting your alma mater.

[laughs] And presenting the dean
with the chalice.

Well, you see, Father, usually,

we try to keep news
about our excavations confidential.

There are many reasons for this,
but it's primarily for security.

Uh... But surely,
the dean will have to know.

It doesn't make sense.

He has to be made aware

that we have discovered
the fourth century chalice

and possibly the oldest church
in all of Paris.

I'm afraid I cannot allow it, Father.

[tense music playing]

Professor Vázquez, I understand you want
to give the news to your superiors.

However, this is my church,
and I will bring the news.

Uh, where is the chalice?

Oh!

[ex-con] And why shouldn't the priest
take the chalice to Spain?

This is his church.

His chalice.

He takes the chalice.

[Toureaux] Thank you, my dear professor.

I must go and pack my suitcase.

My flight leaves at 8:30.

Uh, goodbye!

[cell phone ringing and vibrating]

[call connects]

- Damián?
- [Damián] The priest has the chalice.

He's traveling to Spain

and intends to bring it
to the University of Salamanca.

In 12 hours he'll know it's fake,
and he'll send the police.

[tense music swells]

[Berlin] So after months
of sleepless nights

and the exhilaration
of planning our heist,

we now found ourselves
on the precipice of failure.

All because of one man's vanity.

It was time for me to remind him that
pride is one of the seven deadly sins.

But at this very moment,

on the other side
of the street, she was there,

unaware that the greatest romance
in history awaited us.

The stars had aligned,

and we were gifted the opportunity
to go to the opera.

Together.

And that was my dilemma.

Choose between the two primordial forces
of the universe.

Money... or love.

[energetic rock music playing]

♪ Gettin' out of the city... ♪

[Berlin] Listen to me carefully.

We have to get
the chalice back, understood?

Do whatever it takes to get it.

I don't care if you have to hang him
by his .... .... to get it.

But you will bring it back to me.

♪ Gonna let the water... ♪

[Berlin] Who cares
if love ends or fades away?

- It's the only thing worth living for.
- [elevator bell dings]

["Je t'aime moi non plus"
by Serge Gainsbourg playing]

[echoing] Camille!

Camille!

[gentle French song continues]

["Je t'aime moi non plus" ends]