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1
00:00:01,035 --> 00:00:02,645
Uncle herman! Hi, it's gabe.
2
00:00:02,669 --> 00:00:04,403
Listen, I'm glad I caught you.
3
00:00:04,472 --> 00:00:06,483
I got a problem, julie's
Gonna be home in five minutes
4
00:00:06,507 --> 00:00:08,374
And I don't have
A joke to tell her.
5
00:00:08,442 --> 00:00:11,343
Have you done
Anything funny lately?
6
00:00:11,412 --> 00:00:14,113
Have you heard
Anything funny lately?
7
00:00:14,181 --> 00:00:15,692
You heard about a guy
Who crossed a beaver
8
00:00:15,716 --> 00:00:17,416
And an elephant?
9
00:00:17,485 --> 00:00:19,451
Doesn't know what he got.
10
00:00:19,520 --> 00:00:22,054
But you should see the
Size of the dams it builds.
11
00:00:25,893 --> 00:00:27,692
Anything else, come on!
12
00:00:27,761 --> 00:00:28,860
What?
13
00:00:28,929 --> 00:00:31,196
You were so paranoid
Once, if you went to
14
00:00:31,265 --> 00:00:32,909
A football game and
The players got into
15
00:00:32,933 --> 00:00:37,102
A huddle, you would think
They were talking about you.
16
00:00:37,171 --> 00:00:40,339
Come on, uncle herman,
Give me the a material.
17
00:00:40,408 --> 00:00:42,474
Oh, you knew a guy
That was so mean,
18
00:00:42,543 --> 00:00:45,977
Used to train homing
Pigeons and then move.
19
00:00:51,318 --> 00:00:53,230
Come on, uncle herman,
She's gonna be right home!
20
00:00:53,254 --> 00:00:55,454
Give me a good one,
A joke, a limerick,
21
00:00:55,523 --> 00:00:58,490
A pun, a knock-knock,
Anything, a riddle,
22
00:00:58,559 --> 00:00:59,824
Come on, herman!
23
00:00:59,893 --> 00:01:01,527
I'm desperate!
24
00:01:07,568 --> 00:01:13,438
♪
25
00:01:15,408 --> 00:01:18,076
♪ welcome back ♪
26
00:01:18,144 --> 00:01:21,880
♪ your dreams were
Your ticket out ♪
27
00:01:21,949 --> 00:01:23,982
♪ welcome back ♪
28
00:01:24,051 --> 00:01:28,820
♪ to that same old place
That you laughed about ♪
29
00:01:28,889 --> 00:01:30,989
♪ well the names
Have all changed
30
00:01:31,058 --> 00:01:33,158
Since you hung around ♪
31
00:01:33,227 --> 00:01:35,327
♪ but those dreams have remained
32
00:01:35,396 --> 00:01:37,595
And they've turned around ♪
33
00:01:37,664 --> 00:01:39,798
♪ who'd have thought
They'd lead ya ♪
34
00:01:39,866 --> 00:01:41,866
♪ who'd have thought
They'd lead ya ♪
35
00:01:41,935 --> 00:01:43,735
♪ back here where we need ya ♪
36
00:01:43,804 --> 00:01:46,071
♪ back here where we need ya ♪
37
00:01:46,140 --> 00:01:47,973
♪ yeah, we tease him a lot
38
00:01:48,041 --> 00:01:50,242
'cause we got him on the spot ♪
39
00:01:50,311 --> 00:01:52,277
♪ welcome back ♪
40
00:01:52,346 --> 00:01:58,283
♪ welcome back, welcome
Back, welcome back ♪♪
41
00:01:58,352 --> 00:02:00,051
♪
42
00:02:00,588 --> 00:02:06,458
♪
43
00:02:07,694 --> 00:02:09,761
Okay, okay, guys.
44
00:02:09,830 --> 00:02:15,667
♪
45
00:02:16,637 --> 00:02:17,936
Wait a minute, wait a minute.
46
00:02:18,005 --> 00:02:20,739
Look, all I know is
That the silver gloves
47
00:02:20,807 --> 00:02:22,674
Boxing match is
On friday, right?
48
00:02:22,743 --> 00:02:23,942
Yeah.
49
00:02:24,011 --> 00:02:26,945
And carvelli is fighting
For new utrecht, right?
50
00:02:27,013 --> 00:02:29,214
Man, I been waiting all year
51
00:02:29,282 --> 00:02:31,122
To get my hands
On that carvelli.
52
00:02:31,184 --> 00:02:32,283
Oh, yeah.
53
00:02:32,353 --> 00:02:34,953
I want 'em, I want 'em!
54
00:02:35,021 --> 00:02:36,700
Mellow out, juan, mellow out.
55
00:02:36,724 --> 00:02:37,724
Now listen.
56
00:02:37,791 --> 00:02:39,691
I know that you want him.
57
00:02:39,760 --> 00:02:41,693
We all want him, right?
58
00:02:41,762 --> 00:02:44,229
But we gotta do it the
Democratic way, okay?
59
00:02:44,297 --> 00:02:48,934
All right. One
Potato, two potato...
60
00:02:49,002 --> 00:02:52,170
Three potato,
Four. Five potato...
61
00:02:52,239 --> 00:02:55,406
Hey, what happened to my potato?
62
00:02:55,475 --> 00:02:58,110
You forgot my potato!
63
00:02:58,178 --> 00:02:59,555
I'm a sweathog, too, you know,
64
00:02:59,579 --> 00:03:01,479
Don't I get a chance?
65
00:03:01,548 --> 00:03:04,215
A chance to what, die?
66
00:03:04,284 --> 00:03:05,684
Carvelli's a gorilla.
67
00:03:05,753 --> 00:03:06,896
Yeah, well, I can handle...
68
00:03:06,920 --> 00:03:08,954
Come on, arn, it's a
Matter of integrity.
69
00:03:09,022 --> 00:03:10,022
You see?
70
00:03:10,090 --> 00:03:11,434
A guy who fights
Carvelli, you know,
71
00:03:11,458 --> 00:03:13,925
He's gotta be strong
And he's gotta be clever.
72
00:03:13,994 --> 00:03:17,162
I'm strong.
73
00:03:17,230 --> 00:03:18,463
You're strong, right?
74
00:03:18,531 --> 00:03:20,276
You get your little
Sister to carry your books
75
00:03:20,300 --> 00:03:23,035
To school, you call that strong?
76
00:03:23,103 --> 00:03:27,705
No, I call that clever.
77
00:03:27,774 --> 00:03:29,852
Just cool it, 'cause we got
More important decisions
78
00:03:29,876 --> 00:03:31,376
To make right now, all right?
79
00:03:31,445 --> 00:03:32,722
We gotta make
Decisions, little arnold!
80
00:03:32,746 --> 00:03:33,823
Yeah, let's make decisions.
81
00:03:33,847 --> 00:03:36,681
Arnold, arnold.
82
00:03:36,750 --> 00:03:38,617
No one's saying you're
Not one of the boys,
83
00:03:38,686 --> 00:03:39,751
I mean, you are.
84
00:03:39,820 --> 00:03:41,731
But friday at 3:30,
Whoever faces off
85
00:03:41,755 --> 00:03:46,391
Against carvelli
Has got to be a man!
86
00:03:46,460 --> 00:03:47,526
I'm a man.
87
00:03:47,594 --> 00:03:51,029
Only by a technicality.
88
00:03:51,098 --> 00:03:55,667
A very small technicality.
89
00:03:55,736 --> 00:03:56,736
Yeah?
90
00:03:56,770 --> 00:03:58,481
Well I am such a
Man that I am not
91
00:03:58,505 --> 00:04:03,808
The slightest bit
Upset by all this!
92
00:04:03,877 --> 00:04:05,977
Hey, arnold.
93
00:04:06,046 --> 00:04:07,378
Arnold!
94
00:04:13,754 --> 00:04:15,553
Arnold, why are you so upset?
95
00:04:15,622 --> 00:04:18,122
Because my dignity
Has been attacked.
96
00:04:18,191 --> 00:04:20,225
My core has been shaken.
97
00:04:20,294 --> 00:04:23,995
I have been totally humiliated.
98
00:04:24,063 --> 00:04:27,098
Oh, I thought it was
Something serious.
99
00:04:27,167 --> 00:04:28,967
I'm only kidding
Arnold, okay, okay,
100
00:04:29,036 --> 00:04:30,101
What's the problem?
101
00:04:30,170 --> 00:04:32,470
Mr. Kotter, this
Is no little thing.
102
00:04:32,539 --> 00:04:35,706
I am a sweathog,
I got my rights.
103
00:04:35,775 --> 00:04:37,620
As much right as
Any other sweathog
104
00:04:37,644 --> 00:04:41,079
To get into the ring
With carvelli on friday.
105
00:04:41,148 --> 00:04:43,515
You want to fight carvelli?
106
00:04:43,583 --> 00:04:45,161
Arnold, when did you
First notice this need
107
00:04:45,185 --> 00:04:48,453
To do away with yourself?
108
00:04:48,521 --> 00:04:49,765
Arnold, look,
You're not a fighter,
109
00:04:49,789 --> 00:04:51,590
I mean, you've got
Other good points.
110
00:04:51,658 --> 00:04:54,892
You're smart, you're charming,
111
00:04:54,961 --> 00:04:56,895
You're fun to be around.
112
00:04:56,964 --> 00:05:00,165
You forgot my lilting laugh.
113
00:05:00,233 --> 00:05:03,168
Fun to be around.
114
00:05:03,236 --> 00:05:05,636
Arnold, look, if the guys
Don't want you to fight carvelli
115
00:05:05,705 --> 00:05:08,173
It's just because
They're looking after you.
116
00:05:11,978 --> 00:05:14,346
Hey! Hey, here comes carvelli.
117
00:05:14,414 --> 00:05:16,414
Here comes carvelli!
118
00:05:16,483 --> 00:05:18,683
Yeah, and that
Little chump, murray!
119
00:05:18,752 --> 00:05:21,853
Well, well, well, if it
Ain't the sweat punks.
120
00:05:21,922 --> 00:05:24,956
Well, if it ain't
The sweat punks.
121
00:05:25,025 --> 00:05:28,459
Jumpin' rope, carvelli?
122
00:05:28,528 --> 00:05:30,106
What's the matter,
You tear your dress
123
00:05:30,130 --> 00:05:35,333
When you was playin' hopscotch?
124
00:05:35,402 --> 00:05:37,135
That's funny.
125
00:05:37,204 --> 00:05:39,838
Just so happens I'm in training.
126
00:05:39,907 --> 00:05:44,809
Toilet training?
127
00:05:44,878 --> 00:05:46,745
I love that one!
128
00:05:46,813 --> 00:05:48,846
I didn't hear that, epstein.
129
00:05:48,915 --> 00:05:54,819
He asked if you was in
Toilet training, champ.
130
00:05:54,888 --> 00:05:57,255
Which one of you guys gonna
Be the lucky corpse, huh?
131
00:05:57,324 --> 00:05:58,324
You?
132
00:05:58,392 --> 00:06:00,892
Well, uh, better
Not be me, carvelli.
133
00:06:00,960 --> 00:06:03,794
'cause I'm half puerto
Rican, half jewish.
134
00:06:03,863 --> 00:06:05,129
So what?
135
00:06:05,198 --> 00:06:06,498
So?
136
00:06:06,566 --> 00:06:08,544
How would you like
To get bar mitzvah'd
137
00:06:08,568 --> 00:06:12,370
With a hubcap?
138
00:06:12,439 --> 00:06:15,673
Hey, you can't talk
To my man like that.
139
00:06:15,742 --> 00:06:17,576
Yo man.
140
00:06:17,644 --> 00:06:20,379
You better stick close
To your man, murray,
141
00:06:20,447 --> 00:06:24,349
'cause after friday, you
Won't be spongin' him down.
142
00:06:24,418 --> 00:06:29,454
You gonna be
Wheelin' him around.
143
00:06:29,523 --> 00:06:32,323
You know, you sound exactly
Like the guy that I fought
144
00:06:32,393 --> 00:06:33,725
Last year.
145
00:06:33,793 --> 00:06:36,494
He's in the guinness
Book of world records.
146
00:06:36,563 --> 00:06:39,364
Under pain.
147
00:06:39,433 --> 00:06:41,365
You don't scare us, carvelli.
148
00:06:41,434 --> 00:06:43,146
Any one of my boys here
Can make you feel like
149
00:06:43,170 --> 00:06:45,536
You just been through a blender.
150
00:06:45,605 --> 00:06:51,242
Yeah, how would you like
It if we frapped your face?
151
00:06:51,311 --> 00:06:53,377
Hey, I didn't hear
That, horshack!
152
00:06:53,447 --> 00:06:57,982
He asked if you liked your
Face frapped, carvelli.
153
00:06:58,051 --> 00:06:59,117
I heard!
154
00:06:59,185 --> 00:07:01,253
Hey, carvelli.
155
00:07:01,321 --> 00:07:04,589
I sure hope you ain't
Allergic to canvas,
156
00:07:04,657 --> 00:07:08,360
Because that's where you're
Gonna be spendin' friday.
157
00:07:08,428 --> 00:07:12,164
Face down!
158
00:07:12,232 --> 00:07:13,609
Are you threatening
Me, horshack?
159
00:07:13,633 --> 00:07:14,833
This is getting out of line.
160
00:07:14,901 --> 00:07:16,901
He didn't mean it.
161
00:07:16,970 --> 00:07:18,480
The only thing that's
Gonna be out of line
162
00:07:18,504 --> 00:07:19,771
Is your spine!
163
00:07:19,839 --> 00:07:25,176
Ha-ha!
164
00:07:25,245 --> 00:07:29,814
Your face is gonna be so ugly...
165
00:07:29,883 --> 00:07:35,019
We're gonna have to
Close it down on weekends.
166
00:07:35,088 --> 00:07:36,020
All right.
167
00:07:36,089 --> 00:07:37,289
All right.
168
00:07:37,357 --> 00:07:39,057
That's it, horshack.
169
00:07:39,126 --> 00:07:40,126
I want you.
170
00:07:40,193 --> 00:07:42,694
Whoa, whoa.
171
00:07:42,762 --> 00:07:43,840
You heard what he said.
172
00:07:43,864 --> 00:07:45,830
- me?
- yeah, you! Mouth!
173
00:07:45,899 --> 00:07:48,266
Me?
174
00:07:48,335 --> 00:07:51,603
What did I say?
175
00:07:51,671 --> 00:07:55,306
You said carvelli will
Wind up on the canvas.
176
00:07:55,375 --> 00:07:58,843
With his spine outta line.
177
00:07:58,912 --> 00:08:02,313
His face frapped
And lookin' so ugly
178
00:08:02,382 --> 00:08:06,751
They close it down
On the weekend.
179
00:08:06,820 --> 00:08:08,986
If that's what I said,
That's what I said.
180
00:08:09,055 --> 00:08:11,489
Arnold horshack
Is a man of his word.
181
00:08:11,558 --> 00:08:13,191
And you're on, carvelli.
182
00:08:13,260 --> 00:08:14,359
Give me these.
183
00:08:14,428 --> 00:08:17,195
You want to see, you
Want to see training?
184
00:08:17,264 --> 00:08:20,932
The kid is gonna show
You training here.
185
00:08:24,438 --> 00:08:27,772
A, my name is arnold,
Mt mother's name...
186
00:08:32,779 --> 00:08:34,712
Cut that out, you're
Embarrassin' us.
187
00:08:34,781 --> 00:08:35,958
Listen, if you're gonna do this,
188
00:08:35,982 --> 00:08:37,048
You do this right.
189
00:08:37,117 --> 00:08:41,219
You do it like this.
190
00:08:41,288 --> 00:08:44,956
B, my name is barbarino.
191
00:08:45,024 --> 00:08:47,192
I'll say the ba, ba-ba-ba.
192
00:08:47,260 --> 00:08:50,828
Ba, ba, ba, barbarino.
193
00:08:50,897 --> 00:08:53,198
All right, all right, all right.
194
00:08:59,639 --> 00:09:04,108
Enough of this top 40 stuff.
195
00:09:04,177 --> 00:09:05,844
Come on, murray.
196
00:09:05,912 --> 00:09:08,179
I gotta go rent a tux.
197
00:09:08,248 --> 00:09:10,214
For a funeral.
198
00:09:10,283 --> 00:09:17,355
C, my name's carvelli... What?
199
00:09:17,423 --> 00:09:19,035
What are you all lookin' at?
200
00:09:19,059 --> 00:09:21,158
The guy challenged
Me and I accepted,
201
00:09:21,227 --> 00:09:23,561
What you want me
To do, run away?
202
00:09:23,630 --> 00:09:26,063
Hide out in some
Foreign country?
203
00:09:26,132 --> 00:09:28,466
Now we're down to
Two foreign countries.
204
00:09:28,535 --> 00:09:31,035
Afghanistan and newark.
205
00:09:34,775 --> 00:09:36,641
Newark, huh?
206
00:09:36,710 --> 00:09:38,976
I'd rather fight carvelli.
207
00:09:39,045 --> 00:09:41,078
Yeah, and end up in
An emergency ward.
208
00:09:41,147 --> 00:09:42,780
Look, I gave my word.
209
00:09:42,849 --> 00:09:45,784
Arnold, you can always
Take back your word.
210
00:09:45,852 --> 00:09:48,620
You can't take back your teeth.
211
00:09:48,688 --> 00:09:51,155
I don't care.
212
00:09:51,224 --> 00:09:53,135
How would you like to
Get hit in the stomach?
213
00:09:53,159 --> 00:09:55,460
So many times that
It packs up and looks
214
00:09:55,528 --> 00:09:58,863
For a new body?
215
00:09:58,931 --> 00:10:00,398
I don't care.
216
00:10:00,467 --> 00:10:03,535
That's the way it's gonna
Be at the sound of that bell.
217
00:10:03,603 --> 00:10:06,538
I care, I care!
218
00:10:06,606 --> 00:10:10,074
I see my whole life
Flashing before my eyes!
219
00:10:10,143 --> 00:10:12,844
And I'm not even in it.
220
00:10:12,913 --> 00:10:14,813
Arnold, calm down, all right?
221
00:10:14,881 --> 00:10:16,641
All right, you guys
Stay here for a minute.
222
00:10:16,683 --> 00:10:18,161
The rest of you, read chapter 14
223
00:10:18,185 --> 00:10:19,317
By tomorrow.
224
00:10:19,385 --> 00:10:23,521
We always read chapter 14.
225
00:10:23,590 --> 00:10:26,091
Then read chapter 7 twice.
226
00:10:30,430 --> 00:10:31,841
All right, I don't understand
How you let arnold
227
00:10:31,865 --> 00:10:33,798
Get himself involved in this.
228
00:10:33,867 --> 00:10:35,211
We tried to talk him out of it,
229
00:10:35,235 --> 00:10:36,635
But he wouldn't listen to us.
230
00:10:36,703 --> 00:10:38,114
One minute he was
Arnold horshack,
231
00:10:38,138 --> 00:10:42,606
The next minute,
The great white hope.
232
00:10:42,676 --> 00:10:43,986
But don't worry
About it, mr. Kotter,
233
00:10:44,010 --> 00:10:45,688
I got it all figured out.
234
00:10:45,712 --> 00:10:46,922
I'm gonna have the kid come down
235
00:10:46,946 --> 00:10:52,250
With that bubonic plague.
236
00:10:52,319 --> 00:10:56,087
Hey! Don't you guys
Ever listen to me?
237
00:10:56,155 --> 00:10:58,256
I am fighting carvelli.
238
00:10:58,324 --> 00:10:59,601
Stop it, arnold, you're
Not fighting anybody.
239
00:10:59,625 --> 00:11:00,825
You hear that?
240
00:11:00,894 --> 00:11:02,371
I don't want to hear any
More about this boxing
241
00:11:02,395 --> 00:11:04,662
And this stupid silver
Gloves competition.
242
00:11:04,730 --> 00:11:06,441
Oh, uh, kotter, about
The silver gloves
243
00:11:06,465 --> 00:11:09,100
Boxing match on friday...
244
00:11:09,169 --> 00:11:11,013
We're gonna need a
Real powerhouse in there
245
00:11:11,037 --> 00:11:12,670
Against carvelli.
246
00:11:12,739 --> 00:11:18,042
Would you settle
For a power failure?
247
00:11:18,111 --> 00:11:19,989
Now, listen, we've had
These boxing matches
248
00:11:20,013 --> 00:11:22,180
For the past 20 years, and
You know how many times
249
00:11:22,249 --> 00:11:23,681
Buchanan has won?
250
00:11:23,750 --> 00:11:24,616
None!
251
00:11:24,684 --> 00:11:25,828
That's not true, mr. Woodman.
252
00:11:25,852 --> 00:11:27,352
Bonzo maretti won once.
253
00:11:27,420 --> 00:11:31,322
Eating your opponent
Doesn't count.
254
00:11:31,391 --> 00:11:33,436
Every vice principal
Has some sort of trophy,
255
00:11:33,460 --> 00:11:35,426
I want that trophy!
256
00:11:35,495 --> 00:11:37,428
Don't worry about
It, mr. Woodman.
257
00:11:37,497 --> 00:11:39,764
One of us already
Volunteered to box.
258
00:11:39,832 --> 00:11:41,065
You have?
259
00:11:41,134 --> 00:11:43,601
Barbarino, I'm proud
Of you, go in there,
260
00:11:43,669 --> 00:11:45,103
Win that trophy.
261
00:11:45,171 --> 00:11:46,870
But it ain't me.
262
00:11:46,939 --> 00:11:48,072
Oh.
263
00:11:48,141 --> 00:11:49,840
Epstein. Proud of ya.
264
00:11:49,909 --> 00:11:53,411
I'm proud of you,
Too, mr. Woodman!
265
00:11:53,480 --> 00:11:56,714
But I ain't gonna fight 'em!
266
00:11:56,782 --> 00:11:58,416
Washington?
267
00:11:58,485 --> 00:12:00,618
Strike three, mr. Woodman.
268
00:12:11,565 --> 00:12:14,499
All right, kotter.
269
00:12:14,568 --> 00:12:17,501
Who is it?
270
00:12:17,570 --> 00:12:18,915
Horshack wants to be the one
271
00:12:18,939 --> 00:12:20,371
To fight carvelli.
272
00:12:20,440 --> 00:12:23,608
Ha-ha-ha!
273
00:12:23,677 --> 00:12:25,410
I'm serious, mr. Woodman.
274
00:12:25,478 --> 00:12:26,810
Horshack?
275
00:12:26,880 --> 00:12:27,880
Horshack.
276
00:12:27,947 --> 00:12:30,582
Horshack.
277
00:12:30,650 --> 00:12:32,016
Kotter.
278
00:12:32,085 --> 00:12:34,185
You're a warped person.
279
00:12:34,254 --> 00:12:35,898
You're doing this
Just to deprive me
280
00:12:35,922 --> 00:12:37,589
Of my trophy.
281
00:12:37,657 --> 00:12:39,056
You were warped then.
282
00:12:39,125 --> 00:12:40,791
You're warped now!
283
00:12:40,860 --> 00:12:41,926
You're warped!
284
00:12:41,994 --> 00:12:42,927
Warped!
285
00:12:42,995 --> 00:12:44,395
Warped!
286
00:12:52,805 --> 00:12:54,539
This has gone far enough.
287
00:12:54,607 --> 00:12:56,307
I'm calling it off.
288
00:12:56,376 --> 00:12:57,641
Call it off?
289
00:12:57,710 --> 00:13:01,312
Mr. Kotter, you
Can't call it off.
290
00:13:01,381 --> 00:13:02,946
Listen.
291
00:13:03,015 --> 00:13:05,383
All my life, people have been...
292
00:13:05,451 --> 00:13:08,118
Trying to push me aside.
293
00:13:08,188 --> 00:13:09,920
"Arnold, go to your room."
294
00:13:09,989 --> 00:13:11,889
"Arnold, go outside and play."
295
00:13:11,957 --> 00:13:15,226
"Arnold, we'll meet
Ya after school."
296
00:13:15,295 --> 00:13:17,428
Mr. Kotter.
297
00:13:17,497 --> 00:13:21,232
I'm tired of being pushed aside.
298
00:13:21,301 --> 00:13:22,700
I understand, arnold.
299
00:13:22,769 --> 00:13:24,280
But there are other
Ways to prove you're a man
300
00:13:24,304 --> 00:13:27,939
Besides fighting a big
Starkle like carvelli.
301
00:13:28,008 --> 00:13:31,542
Mr. Kotter, sometimes,
A man has to stand up
302
00:13:31,611 --> 00:13:32,922
For himself, even
Though he knows
303
00:13:32,946 --> 00:13:35,479
He's gonna land
Flat on his back.
304
00:13:35,548 --> 00:13:38,649
Haven't you ever felt like that?
305
00:13:38,718 --> 00:13:40,284
Yeah, once.
306
00:13:40,353 --> 00:13:41,953
There was this girl.
307
00:13:47,593 --> 00:13:50,194
You wanted to fight a girl?
308
00:13:51,530 --> 00:13:54,065
No, there was this
Girl I really liked.
309
00:13:54,133 --> 00:13:55,967
Her name was leylani shapiro.
310
00:13:56,035 --> 00:13:58,970
Went out together a few times.
311
00:13:59,038 --> 00:14:00,282
One day, this guy
Comes up to me,
312
00:14:00,306 --> 00:14:02,773
Big, heavyweight jock type.
313
00:14:02,842 --> 00:14:04,720
He told me that he
Was leylani's boyfriend
314
00:14:04,744 --> 00:14:06,188
And if I would
Continue to see her,
315
00:14:06,212 --> 00:14:09,580
He was gonna rearrange my face.
316
00:14:09,649 --> 00:14:12,250
I thought about it, I
Thought about it a lot.
317
00:14:12,318 --> 00:14:14,318
What he said and...
318
00:14:14,387 --> 00:14:16,887
I knew he was gonna
Do what he said.
319
00:14:16,956 --> 00:14:19,490
So I called up leylani and I...
320
00:14:19,559 --> 00:14:22,760
Told her I couldn't
See her anymore.
321
00:14:22,829 --> 00:14:27,599
And how did that make you feel?
322
00:14:27,667 --> 00:14:29,267
How'd that make me feel?
323
00:14:29,336 --> 00:14:34,105
I felt like...
324
00:14:34,173 --> 00:14:38,509
Arnold, if you really think
That you have to do this,
325
00:14:38,578 --> 00:14:40,177
I'm behind you.
326
00:14:52,592 --> 00:14:58,262
♪
327
00:14:58,331 --> 00:14:59,775
How you doing, freddie?
328
00:14:59,799 --> 00:15:01,799
Yo, mr. Kotter.
329
00:15:01,868 --> 00:15:04,202
Now you know it should be
One of us fighting carvelli.
330
00:15:04,270 --> 00:15:05,970
I mean, they bettin'
Horshack don't live
331
00:15:06,039 --> 00:15:08,506
Through the weigh-in.
332
00:15:08,574 --> 00:15:09,985
This is not a street fight.
333
00:15:10,009 --> 00:15:11,208
It's a sport.
334
00:15:11,277 --> 00:15:12,476
There's a ring.
335
00:15:12,545 --> 00:15:15,479
A referee, and padded gloves.
336
00:15:15,548 --> 00:15:18,249
He's gonna get killed.
337
00:15:18,318 --> 00:15:19,650
Not in a ring.
338
00:15:19,719 --> 00:15:21,364
But freddie, if he
Tries to prove himself
339
00:15:21,388 --> 00:15:23,755
In some alley, he might.
340
00:15:23,823 --> 00:15:25,623
Hey, mr. Kotter.
341
00:15:25,692 --> 00:15:27,303
Who was that guy
With the mustache
342
00:15:27,327 --> 00:15:29,393
And the crummy jokes,
Said something about
343
00:15:29,462 --> 00:15:32,129
Fightin' gets you nowhere?
344
00:15:32,198 --> 00:15:33,842
- that was me.
- all right.
345
00:15:33,866 --> 00:15:35,499
And I still believe it.
346
00:15:35,568 --> 00:15:37,969
But this is a special case.
347
00:15:44,710 --> 00:15:46,544
Hey, congratulations, arnold!
348
00:15:46,612 --> 00:15:49,947
You took ten minutes
Off yesterday's mile.
349
00:15:50,015 --> 00:15:51,982
I know.
350
00:15:52,051 --> 00:15:56,320
The last eight
Blocks I took a cab.
351
00:15:56,389 --> 00:15:57,488
Come on, arnold.
352
00:15:57,557 --> 00:15:58,867
Fight with carvelli's
In two days.
353
00:15:58,891 --> 00:16:00,536
You got to build
Up your endurance.
354
00:16:00,560 --> 00:16:01,759
Yeah, mr. Kotter.
355
00:16:01,827 --> 00:16:03,327
You work on his endurance.
356
00:16:03,396 --> 00:16:06,164
And I'll go light a candle.
357
00:16:06,232 --> 00:16:07,792
See you later, freddie. Bye-bye.
358
00:16:07,833 --> 00:16:09,867
Have a good time.
359
00:16:09,935 --> 00:16:11,135
All right, arnold.
360
00:16:11,204 --> 00:16:12,581
Let's start out with
Some calisthenics.
361
00:16:12,605 --> 00:16:14,172
- okay.
- I want to build you up.
362
00:16:14,240 --> 00:16:15,817
When you meet carvelli,
Be in good shape.
363
00:16:15,841 --> 00:16:17,620
All right, the first
Thing to do is push-ups.
364
00:16:17,644 --> 00:16:19,054
Okay, we do the hard kind.
365
00:16:19,078 --> 00:16:20,623
You gotta clap in
The middle, okay?
366
00:16:20,647 --> 00:16:21,923
- okay, show me.
- now watch me.
367
00:16:21,947 --> 00:16:24,982
Get down, do your push-up.
368
00:16:25,051 --> 00:16:27,117
Clap in the middle. Okay.
369
00:16:28,421 --> 00:16:30,321
- try it.
- okay.
370
00:16:30,390 --> 00:16:33,057
You get down, you
Do your push-up,
371
00:16:33,125 --> 00:16:34,492
You clap in the middle.
372
00:16:34,561 --> 00:16:36,927
You do your push-up...
All right, okay.
373
00:16:36,996 --> 00:16:38,407
Very good, arnold, very good.
374
00:16:38,431 --> 00:16:40,564
That's good, that's good?
375
00:16:40,633 --> 00:16:41,777
What I want to work
On now is something
376
00:16:41,801 --> 00:16:43,034
That's really important.
377
00:16:43,102 --> 00:16:44,746
Psyching out your opponent.
378
00:16:44,770 --> 00:16:46,770
Now all good
Fighters do this, okay?
379
00:16:46,840 --> 00:16:48,772
Now I want you to
Pretend I'm carvelli.
380
00:16:48,842 --> 00:16:51,309
All right, now the ref is
Introducing us in the ring.
381
00:16:51,377 --> 00:16:53,510
And I want you to give
Me a cold, angry stare.
382
00:16:53,579 --> 00:16:55,346
Put it right through me, okay?
383
00:17:05,858 --> 00:17:09,660
Arnold, you gonna
Scare him, not date him.
384
00:17:09,728 --> 00:17:11,695
Come on, let's not
Act silly about this.
385
00:17:11,764 --> 00:17:13,175
People are gonna say
You're the silliest fighter
386
00:17:13,199 --> 00:17:19,103
They ever seen.
387
00:17:19,172 --> 00:17:22,406
Until now.
388
00:17:22,475 --> 00:17:23,719
Mr. Woodman, what
Are you doing here?
389
00:17:23,743 --> 00:17:26,143
Not woodman, call
Me the wanapotomy kid.
390
00:17:26,212 --> 00:17:28,879
I want to give horshack
Here a few pointers.
391
00:17:28,948 --> 00:17:30,058
What do you know about boxing?
392
00:17:30,082 --> 00:17:32,016
Are you kiddin',
Kotter, why in my day,
393
00:17:32,084 --> 00:17:33,895
I shredded the likes
Of butch crawford,
394
00:17:33,919 --> 00:17:37,588
Bobo arseni, mimi finklestein.
395
00:17:37,657 --> 00:17:39,290
Mimi finklestein?
396
00:17:39,359 --> 00:17:40,824
A killer, kotter.
397
00:17:40,893 --> 00:17:43,794
A real killer.
398
00:17:43,862 --> 00:17:45,696
All right, arnold.
399
00:17:45,764 --> 00:17:47,576
Just pretend this
Is the ring, okay?
400
00:17:47,600 --> 00:17:48,699
All right.
401
00:17:48,767 --> 00:17:51,068
Now, I want you to
Make sure of one thing.
402
00:17:51,136 --> 00:17:53,170
When you lead, you
Always lead with your left.
403
00:17:53,239 --> 00:17:54,438
Lead with your left.
404
00:17:54,507 --> 00:17:56,774
Your other left.
405
00:17:56,842 --> 00:17:58,809
Now protect your
Body with your right.
406
00:18:04,384 --> 00:18:06,544
What do you want to do,
Kotter, get the kid killed?
407
00:18:06,586 --> 00:18:08,786
Horshack keep your
Left close to your body,
408
00:18:08,854 --> 00:18:10,087
And put your right out.
409
00:18:10,156 --> 00:18:12,389
Way out. That's it.
410
00:18:12,458 --> 00:18:13,769
That's correct, mr. Woodman,
411
00:18:13,793 --> 00:18:15,893
If he was a lawn ornament.
412
00:18:15,962 --> 00:18:17,194
Stop it, arnold.
413
00:18:17,263 --> 00:18:19,074
Here's the basic stairs I
Want you to have, right?
414
00:18:19,098 --> 00:18:20,242
- okay.
- here's how you look.
415
00:18:20,266 --> 00:18:21,576
This way, you won't
Get hurt too bad.
416
00:18:21,600 --> 00:18:22,711
You know, you go like this.
417
00:18:22,735 --> 00:18:23,812
On your toes all the time.
418
00:18:23,836 --> 00:18:26,570
Think carvelli can
Slip into right cross.
419
00:18:26,639 --> 00:18:28,450
Come on, mr. Woodman,
If arnold is like this,
420
00:18:28,474 --> 00:18:30,474
How is carvelli gonna
Slip in a right cross?
421
00:18:30,542 --> 00:18:32,009
Like this!
422
00:18:34,547 --> 00:18:35,847
Look at it!
423
00:18:35,915 --> 00:18:40,550
Both of you down,
Punched out by an old man.
424
00:18:40,619 --> 00:18:43,954
Hey. Maybe I oughta
Fight carvelli.
425
00:18:44,023 --> 00:18:49,894
♪
426
00:18:59,338 --> 00:19:01,872
May I have your
Attention, please?
427
00:19:01,941 --> 00:19:03,319
Before we begin today's bout,
428
00:19:03,343 --> 00:19:05,109
I would like to introduce
429
00:19:05,178 --> 00:19:07,978
One of the past silver
Glove contenders
430
00:19:08,047 --> 00:19:10,748
From buchanan high
Who went on to fame,
431
00:19:10,816 --> 00:19:13,817
Sitting at ringside, from 1955,
432
00:19:13,886 --> 00:19:15,319
Dino crazy delaney!
433
00:19:15,387 --> 00:19:16,687
Oh, yeah, dino!
434
00:19:16,756 --> 00:19:19,356
Dino, dino, dino!
435
00:19:23,595 --> 00:19:25,996
And now, in this corner,
436
00:19:26,065 --> 00:19:28,498
Wearing purple trunks,
437
00:19:28,567 --> 00:19:33,370
Weighing 165 pounds
And foaming at the mouth,
438
00:19:33,439 --> 00:19:37,374
From new utrecht
High, killer carvelli!
439
00:19:43,682 --> 00:19:49,220
And in this corner,
Wearing baggy trunks,
440
00:19:49,288 --> 00:19:52,823
And a look of absolute terror,
441
00:19:52,892 --> 00:20:00,892
At 127 pounds, a
Real good sport...
442
00:20:01,734 --> 00:20:04,601
Sugar arnold horshack!
443
00:20:07,673 --> 00:20:10,808
Horshack, horshack,
We're with you!
444
00:20:10,877 --> 00:20:14,711
Rock 'em, sock
'em, ooh, ooh, ooh!
445
00:20:14,781 --> 00:20:17,414
Yay, horshack!
446
00:20:21,053 --> 00:20:23,988
Carvelli, carvelli, he's my man.
447
00:20:24,056 --> 00:20:27,024
Hey, cool it!
448
00:20:27,093 --> 00:20:28,592
You hear that?
449
00:20:28,660 --> 00:20:30,861
He said "Cool it, murray."
450
00:20:30,930 --> 00:20:34,097
Ain't he the great?
451
00:20:34,166 --> 00:20:36,500
All right, all right,
Arnold's the champion.
452
00:20:36,568 --> 00:20:37,601
He's our man.
453
00:20:37,670 --> 00:20:39,269
You're a good guy.
454
00:20:39,338 --> 00:20:41,939
Arnold, we can still
Get you out of this.
455
00:20:42,008 --> 00:20:43,384
Look, I can get a note for ya.
456
00:20:43,408 --> 00:20:45,843
Just say, "Dear carvelli,
Please excuse arnold
457
00:20:45,911 --> 00:20:46,977
For this fight.
458
00:20:47,046 --> 00:20:51,648
He's allergic to traction."
459
00:20:51,718 --> 00:20:53,383
This is the moment of truth
460
00:20:53,452 --> 00:20:58,221
For arnold horshack.
461
00:20:58,290 --> 00:20:59,957
No, no, no, dino.
462
00:21:05,330 --> 00:21:07,297
All right, both in the
Ring now, horshack.
463
00:21:07,367 --> 00:21:09,199
Come on, horshack!
464
00:21:12,271 --> 00:21:13,203
Yay!
465
00:21:13,272 --> 00:21:14,504
Take it easy.
466
00:21:14,573 --> 00:21:16,718
All right, I want this to
Be a clean, honest fight.
467
00:21:16,742 --> 00:21:19,643
Carvelli, try not to kill him.
468
00:21:19,712 --> 00:21:20,644
Touch gloves.
469
00:21:20,713 --> 00:21:22,413
Ah!
470
00:21:22,481 --> 00:21:27,051
You're in shape,
You're all right.
471
00:21:27,119 --> 00:21:28,497
All right, just try to remember
472
00:21:28,521 --> 00:21:29,664
What I taught you, okay?
473
00:21:29,688 --> 00:21:31,055
Oh, yeah.
474
00:21:31,123 --> 00:21:32,990
Doing the push-ups and clap.
475
00:21:33,059 --> 00:21:35,392
Come on, horshack!
476
00:21:35,460 --> 00:21:37,928
Come on!
477
00:21:37,997 --> 00:21:39,663
Horshack!
478
00:21:39,732 --> 00:21:42,199
Come on!
479
00:21:42,268 --> 00:21:46,336
Hit me!
480
00:21:46,406 --> 00:21:48,406
Oh, yeah!
481
00:21:48,474 --> 00:21:51,741
Come on, carvelli,
You can't run forever!
482
00:21:51,810 --> 00:21:52,810
Yeah!
483
00:21:58,884 --> 00:22:01,218
- carvelli!
- horshack!
484
00:22:15,801 --> 00:22:18,202
Yay!
485
00:22:18,271 --> 00:22:22,172
I got 'em!
486
00:22:22,241 --> 00:22:24,742
Now what do you think
About us now, mr. Carvelli?
487
00:22:28,280 --> 00:22:31,948
One, two... Three...
488
00:22:32,017 --> 00:22:34,017
Come on, get up arnold, get up!
489
00:22:34,086 --> 00:22:41,825
Four... Five... Six...
Seven, eight, nine,
490
00:22:41,894 --> 00:22:43,360
Nine and a half.
491
00:22:43,429 --> 00:22:44,549
Nine and three quarters.
492
00:22:44,597 --> 00:22:46,107
Come on, get up, will ya?
493
00:22:46,131 --> 00:22:47,498
Nine and seven eighths.
494
00:22:47,566 --> 00:22:49,833
I've run out of
Fractions, horshack!
495
00:22:49,902 --> 00:22:51,602
Ten!
496
00:22:51,671 --> 00:22:55,172
The winner... Killer carvelli.
497
00:22:55,240 --> 00:22:56,340
Yay!
498
00:22:56,409 --> 00:22:59,009
Boo!
499
00:22:59,077 --> 00:23:00,711
Killer carvelli.
500
00:23:00,780 --> 00:23:02,145
Are you all right?
501
00:23:02,214 --> 00:23:03,313
Is it over?
502
00:23:03,382 --> 00:23:04,615
Yeah.
503
00:23:04,683 --> 00:23:05,949
Did I win?
504
00:23:06,018 --> 00:23:06,917
Not really.
505
00:23:06,985 --> 00:23:09,520
I didn't think so.
506
00:23:09,588 --> 00:23:11,789
Hey, juan.
507
00:23:11,857 --> 00:23:15,392
They don't think I
Took a dive, do they?
508
00:23:15,460 --> 00:23:17,494
Arnold, as far as
We're concerned,
509
00:23:17,563 --> 00:23:19,929
You're the gold medal kid
With a heavyweight crown.
510
00:23:19,998 --> 00:23:24,034
Yeah.
511
00:23:24,103 --> 00:23:25,848
You made us proud
To be sweathogs.
512
00:23:25,872 --> 00:23:27,905
Look, freddie, I didn't win.
513
00:23:27,974 --> 00:23:29,417
Arnold, you won
As soon as you got
514
00:23:29,441 --> 00:23:30,540
Into that ring.
515
00:23:30,609 --> 00:23:31,953
After that, it was
Just a question of
516
00:23:31,977 --> 00:23:33,110
Who got the trophy.
517
00:23:33,179 --> 00:23:36,080
And we all know who that was.
518
00:23:36,148 --> 00:23:39,015
Hey, arnold, you did all right!
519
00:23:39,085 --> 00:23:44,955
♪
520
00:23:52,030 --> 00:23:53,675
Arnold, you did terrific,
Everybody's proud of you.
521
00:23:53,699 --> 00:23:55,944
Arnold, did I ever tell ya
About my uncle who's a fighter?
522
00:23:55,968 --> 00:23:57,167
Slapsy maxie carter.
523
00:23:57,236 --> 00:23:59,669
No, I don't think so.
524
00:23:59,738 --> 00:24:00,949
He was great, he
Used to eat a pound
525
00:24:00,973 --> 00:24:03,073
Of pickled herring
Before every fight.
526
00:24:03,142 --> 00:24:05,475
Did that make him
A better fighter?
527
00:24:05,544 --> 00:24:06,888
No, but he knocked
Out his opponents
528
00:24:06,912 --> 00:24:08,946
With his breath.
529
00:24:09,014 --> 00:24:10,313
♪
530
00:24:15,188 --> 00:24:20,891
♪
531
00:24:22,828 --> 00:24:25,596
♪ welcome back ♪
532
00:24:25,665 --> 00:24:29,299
♪ your dreams were
Your ticket out ♪
533
00:24:29,368 --> 00:24:31,568
♪ welcome back ♪
534
00:24:31,637 --> 00:24:36,373
♪ to that same old place
That you laughed about ♪
535
00:24:36,442 --> 00:24:38,442
♪ well the names
Have all changed
536
00:24:38,510 --> 00:24:40,677
Since you hung around ♪
537
00:24:40,746 --> 00:24:42,780
♪ but those dreams have remained
538
00:24:42,848 --> 00:24:45,081
And they've turned around ♪
539
00:24:45,150 --> 00:24:47,284
♪ who'd have thought
They'd lead you ♪
540
00:24:47,352 --> 00:24:49,264
♪ who'd have thought
They'd lead you ♪
541
00:24:49,288 --> 00:24:51,187
♪ back here where we need ya ♪
542
00:24:51,256 --> 00:24:53,424
♪ back here where we need ya ♪
543
00:24:53,492 --> 00:24:55,392
♪ yeah we tease him a lot
544
00:24:55,461 --> 00:24:57,661
'cause we got him on the spot ♪
545
00:24:57,730 --> 00:24:59,897
♪ welcome back ♪
546
00:24:59,966 --> 00:25:04,034
♪ welcome back, welcome
Back, welcome back ♪
547
00:25:04,103 --> 00:25:06,269
♪ welcome back, welcome back ♪
548
00:25:06,338 --> 00:25:08,506
♪ welcome back ♪♪
37313
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