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1
00:00:01,300 --> 00:00:04,100
One, two, three!
2
00:00:05,283 --> 00:00:07,166
Okay, you got that one.
3
00:00:07,200 --> 00:00:09,283
Let's try it now, baby.
Come on, man.
4
00:00:09,316 --> 00:00:12,330
One, two, three!
5
00:00:14,660 --> 00:00:15,500
Okay.
6
00:00:16,266 --> 00:00:19,333
Let's go now, baby.
Come on. Come on.
7
00:00:19,366 --> 00:00:21,100
- Come on.
- Ready, Marlon?
8
00:00:21,133 --> 00:00:23,160
One, two..
9
00:00:23,500 --> 00:00:24,300
Give me a head start.
Give me a head start.
10
00:00:24,333 --> 00:00:26,250
One, two, three!
11
00:00:28,133 --> 00:00:29,283
Yeah, you're cheatin'
or somethin'.
12
00:00:29,316 --> 00:00:32,166
I got you now.
I got you now, baby.
13
00:00:32,200 --> 00:00:34,330
One, two, uh.
14
00:00:35,500 --> 00:00:37,330
[Marlon grunting]
15
00:00:41,283 --> 00:00:43,266
Wassup..
16
00:00:45,500 --> 00:00:47,383
♪ Mm I'm gonna get you ♪♪
17
00:00:48,160 --> 00:00:51,500
Alright. Let's go, baby.
Me and you.
18
00:00:51,830 --> 00:00:52,316
Have you
finished,
Little Buddha?
19
00:00:52,350 --> 00:00:54,383
Me and you. Come on.
20
00:00:55,160 --> 00:00:57,500
Show me what you've got.
21
00:00:57,830 --> 00:00:59,350
Bring it on...punk.
22
00:00:59,383 --> 00:01:02,150
One, two, three!
23
00:01:08,216 --> 00:01:10,300
'You scared? You scared?'
24
00:01:10,333 --> 00:01:12,333
Come on.
Bring it on, baby.
25
00:01:12,366 --> 00:01:14,150
- Come on.
- You want some more?
26
00:01:14,183 --> 00:01:16,300
Old stumpy gonna show you
who's strong.
27
00:01:16,333 --> 00:01:18,116
- Come on. Ready?
- You ready?
28
00:01:18,150 --> 00:01:20,116
If I lose this hand,
I always got my feet.
29
00:01:20,150 --> 00:01:22,133
[theme song]
30
00:01:23,266 --> 00:01:25,830
♪ We're brothers ♪
31
00:01:25,116 --> 00:01:26,266
♪ We're happy
and we're singin' ♪
32
00:01:26,300 --> 00:01:29,300
♪ And we're colored ♪
33
00:01:29,333 --> 00:01:32,660
♪ Give me a high-five ♪♪
34
00:01:32,100 --> 00:01:34,183
(male #1)
'Alright. Cut and print.
Beautiful, guys!'
35
00:01:34,216 --> 00:01:36,830
'Dynamite. That is--'
36
00:01:36,116 --> 00:01:38,383
♪ Girl what you got
goin' on tonight? ♪
37
00:01:39,160 --> 00:01:41,166
♪ I got something
that you gonna like ♪
38
00:01:41,200 --> 00:01:43,316
♪ Won't you just chill
with me tonight ♪
39
00:01:43,350 --> 00:01:46,330
♪ I got something
that you gonna like ♪
40
00:01:46,660 --> 00:01:48,216
♪ Girl what you got
going on tonight? ♪
41
00:01:48,250 --> 00:01:50,216
♪ I got something
that you gonna like ♪
42
00:01:50,250 --> 00:01:53,116
♪ Won't you just chill
with me tonight ♪
43
00:01:53,150 --> 00:01:55,133
♪ I got something
that you gonna like ♪
44
00:01:55,166 --> 00:01:56,383
♪ I got something
that you gonna like ♪♪
45
00:02:04,200 --> 00:02:07,200
[Pops humming]
46
00:02:09,116 --> 00:02:10,216
Pops, you are too funny, man!
47
00:02:10,250 --> 00:02:12,160
How can you call that a special
48
00:02:12,500 --> 00:02:13,150
when I could get grilled cheese
49
00:02:13,183 --> 00:02:14,350
and fries separately
50
00:02:14,383 --> 00:02:16,330
and only pay $2.99?
51
00:02:16,660 --> 00:02:17,183
That's what's special about it.
52
00:02:17,216 --> 00:02:19,200
[laughing]
53
00:02:20,250 --> 00:02:21,250
Shawn, guess what.
54
00:02:21,283 --> 00:02:22,300
Daddy got four tickets
55
00:02:22,333 --> 00:02:23,350
for the Met next week.
56
00:02:23,383 --> 00:02:25,216
Oh, guess what,
daddy got ripped off
57
00:02:25,250 --> 00:02:27,300
'cause they're on strike.
58
00:02:27,333 --> 00:02:29,133
No, not the Mets.
59
00:02:29,166 --> 00:02:31,100
The Met. The opera house.
60
00:02:31,133 --> 00:02:32,350
Oh!
61
00:02:32,383 --> 00:02:34,500
Oh, oh, I'm sorry, baby
62
00:02:34,830 --> 00:02:36,183
I-I ain't gonna be able
to make it that night.
63
00:02:36,216 --> 00:02:39,100
Shawn, I haven't even told
you
what night it is.
64
00:02:39,133 --> 00:02:41,383
- Oh. Well, what night is
it?
- It's Friday.
65
00:02:42,160 --> 00:02:44,316
Yeah, Friday-Friday
I'm gonna be real busy.
66
00:02:44,350 --> 00:02:47,133
You just don't wanna
meet my father, do
you?
67
00:02:47,166 --> 00:02:48,283
Well, come on, baby, I mean
68
00:02:48,316 --> 00:02:51,116
your father's a doctor
and I drive a truck.
69
00:02:51,150 --> 00:02:52,300
Lisa, let me explain somethin'
70
00:02:52,333 --> 00:02:54,300
about the fragile male ego.
71
00:02:54,333 --> 00:02:56,100
See, Shawn is not as successful
72
00:02:56,133 --> 00:02:58,160
as Dr. Saunders and myself.
73
00:02:58,500 --> 00:03:00,166
He's a little man,
in a little doo-doo brown
suit
74
00:03:00,200 --> 00:03:02,660
drivin' around New York
in a little truck
75
00:03:02,100 --> 00:03:04,660
like a rat in a maze.
76
00:03:04,100 --> 00:03:07,166
But I think he's so cute
in
his little doo-doo brown
suit.
77
00:03:08,150 --> 00:03:10,200
I think you're being ridiculous.
78
00:03:10,233 --> 00:03:12,216
That's how I feel.
79
00:03:13,350 --> 00:03:15,250
Alright, well,
then I'll tell my
father
80
00:03:15,283 --> 00:03:17,233
you're workin' late, again.
81
00:03:17,266 --> 00:03:19,200
Thank you.
82
00:03:19,233 --> 00:03:22,266
- Bye.
- Bye.
83
00:03:22,300 --> 00:03:25,350
Hey, Pops, quit puttin' me
down
in front of Lisa, man.
84
00:03:25,383 --> 00:03:27,216
I got my pride, you know.
85
00:03:27,250 --> 00:03:29,500
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
86
00:03:29,830 --> 00:03:31,366
That's why you come here to get
your free breakfast, Mr. Pride.
87
00:03:32,000 --> 00:03:34,333
I said I had my pride,
I didn't say I was stupid.
88
00:03:34,366 --> 00:03:37,250
Benny, give him
a four-egg cheese omelet
89
00:03:37,283 --> 00:03:40,216
home fries, jelly
doughnut
and a root beer.
90
00:03:40,250 --> 00:03:42,266
[speaking in Chinese]
91
00:03:44,200 --> 00:03:46,166
Just because your daddy
ate fish heads all his life
92
00:03:46,200 --> 00:03:48,250
don't make you Jenny Craig!
93
00:03:48,283 --> 00:03:51,160
Marlon! Get out here!
94
00:03:51,500 --> 00:03:52,116
I'm not payin' you
all that money to sit
95
00:03:52,150 --> 00:03:54,200
in the back alone,
starin' at the walls!
96
00:03:54,233 --> 00:03:55,383
Hey, pop, I wasn't alone
97
00:03:56,160 --> 00:03:58,233
and, I, I wasn't
starin'
at the wall either.
98
00:03:58,266 --> 00:04:00,500
- I'll call you later,
okay?
- Oh.
99
00:04:00,830 --> 00:04:01,366
- Bye.
- Give me a shake there.
100
00:04:02,000 --> 00:04:04,333
Ha-ba, ha! Work it, girl.
101
00:04:04,366 --> 00:04:06,266
Well, now that your
hands
are free
102
00:04:06,300 --> 00:04:08,660
take those fries
to that customer over
there
103
00:04:08,100 --> 00:04:10,500
and put the rest
of these signs
up..
104
00:04:10,830 --> 00:04:11,183
...before I take you in the back
105
00:04:11,216 --> 00:04:13,133
and I won't be kissing you.
106
00:04:13,166 --> 00:04:14,250
You.
107
00:04:15,266 --> 00:04:16,366
Alright.
108
00:04:21,316 --> 00:04:24,383
- Hey, what are you doin'?
- Quality control, brother.
109
00:04:25,160 --> 00:04:26,266
Quality control.
110
00:04:27,300 --> 00:04:29,330
Hey, wait, Marl.
Wait, hold up.
111
00:04:29,660 --> 00:04:30,133
Don't sit there.
Don't sit there, there's..
112
00:04:30,166 --> 00:04:33,150
[popping]
113
00:04:38,166 --> 00:04:40,133
[screaming]
114
00:04:41,300 --> 00:04:43,183
What the hell are you
howlin' at, man?
115
00:04:43,216 --> 00:04:46,116
I sat on your staple gun.
116
00:04:46,150 --> 00:04:47,233
Oh, God!
117
00:04:47,266 --> 00:04:49,000
Oh, my, God!
118
00:04:49,330 --> 00:04:51,500
Why don't y'all help
me?
Oh, shit!
119
00:04:51,830 --> 00:04:52,350
Are you alright?
D-does it hurt?
120
00:04:52,383 --> 00:04:55,100
Does it hurt?
I don't know. That
hurt?
121
00:04:55,133 --> 00:04:57,150
[screaming]
122
00:04:57,183 --> 00:05:00,116
Somebody help me too, please!
123
00:05:00,150 --> 00:05:01,300
Pop, quick.
124
00:05:01,333 --> 00:05:03,283
How bad is it?
125
00:05:03,316 --> 00:05:05,283
Oh, it's real bad.
126
00:05:05,316 --> 00:05:07,266
The only thing I can see
is the handle.
127
00:05:07,300 --> 00:05:09,150
- Oh, man.
- I think we should pull it
off.
128
00:05:09,183 --> 00:05:12,000
Yeah. Okay. Now, Marlon,
you brace yourself.
129
00:05:12,330 --> 00:05:13,250
I'mma count to three now,
you hold your breath.
130
00:05:13,283 --> 00:05:15,500
- One, two--
- Hold on, wait, pop.
131
00:05:15,830 --> 00:05:16,283
Hold on.
132
00:05:16,316 --> 00:05:18,250
Don't let Esther look.
Esther, turn your head.
133
00:05:18,283 --> 00:05:20,216
Turn your head.
134
00:05:20,250 --> 00:05:23,150
Okay. One, two, three!
135
00:05:23,183 --> 00:05:24,350
[screaming]
136
00:05:24,383 --> 00:05:27,330
Oh, damn!
137
00:05:27,660 --> 00:05:28,333
- Is it bad, pop?
- Yes, it's bad.
138
00:05:28,366 --> 00:05:30,350
You broke the handle!
139
00:05:35,116 --> 00:05:37,150
Will you hurry up, Marlon?
140
00:05:42,500 --> 00:05:43,330
Um, excuse me.
141
00:05:43,660 --> 00:05:45,500
[screaming]
142
00:05:45,830 --> 00:05:47,000
- You wanna..
- Wait.
143
00:05:48,200 --> 00:05:50,233
Excuse me. My little brother
was in an accident.
144
00:05:50,266 --> 00:05:52,330
Fill this out
and sign at the bottom.
145
00:05:52,660 --> 00:05:53,366
But you don't understand,
he's in a lot of pain.
146
00:05:54,000 --> 00:05:55,333
Fill out the form
and sign at the bottom.
147
00:05:55,366 --> 00:05:57,100
But I'm in a hurry
and I gotta go.
148
00:05:57,133 --> 00:05:58,283
So am I!
149
00:05:58,316 --> 00:06:01,330
I got two bottles of vodka
at home with my name on it.
150
00:06:01,660 --> 00:06:03,266
But you don't see me runnin'
outta here now, do you?
151
00:06:03,300 --> 00:06:06,183
Maybe you should start
runnin',
you'd lose a couple pounds.
152
00:06:07,300 --> 00:06:09,166
She was nice.
153
00:06:09,200 --> 00:06:10,366
Damn, Shawn.
154
00:06:11,000 --> 00:06:12,133
I ain't seen
this many sick
people
155
00:06:12,166 --> 00:06:15,333
since Kathie Lee sang
the national anthem.
156
00:06:15,366 --> 00:06:17,316
Just fill out the form, man,
we're gonna be here all day.
157
00:06:17,350 --> 00:06:19,316
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
158
00:06:19,350 --> 00:06:21,366
Say, that looks...bad.
159
00:06:22,000 --> 00:06:24,150
- Yeah.
- You got insurance?
160
00:06:24,183 --> 00:06:25,216
Uh-uh.
161
00:06:25,250 --> 00:06:28,830
Well, that's too bad
'cause I don't either
162
00:06:28,116 --> 00:06:29,366
and I've been here
for three days.
163
00:06:30,000 --> 00:06:32,500
- Three days?
- Yes.
164
00:06:32,830 --> 00:06:34,150
And you'd think I'd get
better treatment too
165
00:06:34,183 --> 00:06:36,316
being an ex-president and all.
166
00:06:36,350 --> 00:06:38,660
- What?
- Yes.
167
00:06:38,100 --> 00:06:40,116
I am Abraham Lincoln.
168
00:06:41,283 --> 00:06:43,366
This guy is crazy.
169
00:06:44,000 --> 00:06:46,000
You there, man, what do
you
think, we're stupid?
170
00:06:46,330 --> 00:06:48,330
Abraham Lincoln has a beard.
171
00:06:49,283 --> 00:06:51,316
Stupid.
172
00:06:51,350 --> 00:06:53,330
Well, look, Marl,
I don't have time to hang out
173
00:06:53,660 --> 00:06:54,183
with you and Abe, I gotta go.
174
00:06:54,216 --> 00:06:56,116
Come on, man, you can't leave me
here for three days.
175
00:06:56,150 --> 00:06:57,216
Shawn, I'm in pain!
176
00:06:57,250 --> 00:06:59,500
It ain't my fault
you don't have insurance.
177
00:06:59,830 --> 00:07:02,183
Hey, why don't you lend
me
your insurance card?
178
00:07:02,216 --> 00:07:04,500
No! It's illegal!
179
00:07:04,830 --> 00:07:06,660
Come on, Shawn,
you heard the
president.
180
00:07:06,100 --> 00:07:08,200
They are never gonna take
care
of me without insurance.
181
00:07:10,300 --> 00:07:12,133
Alright. Here.
182
00:07:13,383 --> 00:07:15,660
- Thank you, brother.
- You're welcome.
183
00:07:15,100 --> 00:07:17,660
Now just remember
you're Shawn Williams.
184
00:07:17,100 --> 00:07:18,133
- I'm Shawn Williams.
- Good.
185
00:07:18,166 --> 00:07:19,250
- What's your name?
- Marlon.
186
00:07:19,283 --> 00:07:21,216
No! You're Shawn Williams, okay?
187
00:07:21,250 --> 00:07:23,200
Oh. Shawn Williams.
188
00:07:23,233 --> 00:07:24,233
- Alright.
- Alright.
189
00:07:24,266 --> 00:07:26,283
- Peace.
- Alright. Later, Shawn.
190
00:07:29,500 --> 00:07:30,350
Here you go,
sour but
beautiful.
191
00:07:30,383 --> 00:07:32,133
Watch it, funny boy.
192
00:07:32,166 --> 00:07:34,333
I'm the one who decides
who goes next.
193
00:07:34,366 --> 00:07:38,660
You keep this up and you'll go
after Abraham Lincoln.
194
00:07:38,100 --> 00:07:41,216
Now, do you have
insurance or not?
195
00:07:41,250 --> 00:07:42,350
Yes, I do.
196
00:07:42,383 --> 00:07:44,116
Boo-ya!
197
00:07:44,150 --> 00:07:45,366
And might I add, I'm, uh..
198
00:07:46,000 --> 00:07:47,250
...strangely attracted to you?
199
00:07:47,283 --> 00:07:48,350
[sniffing]
200
00:07:48,383 --> 00:07:50,183
Your name?
201
00:07:50,216 --> 00:07:52,000
Uh, Shawn Williams.
202
00:07:52,330 --> 00:07:54,160
Shawn...Williams.
203
00:07:54,500 --> 00:07:55,283
Ooh, I like the
way
you say that.
204
00:07:55,316 --> 00:07:58,216
I bet you I can make you say
it
a little bit differently.
205
00:07:58,250 --> 00:08:01,330
Uh, Shawn..
206
00:08:02,333 --> 00:08:04,350
Speak Spanish. Shawnito.
207
00:08:07,330 --> 00:08:09,316
Are you, uh, flirtin' with me,
Mr. Williams?
208
00:08:09,350 --> 00:08:12,830
- I don't know, is it
workin'?
- Hm, yes.
209
00:08:12,116 --> 00:08:13,283
Well, then I'm flirtin'.
210
00:08:13,316 --> 00:08:15,116
[laughing]
211
00:08:15,150 --> 00:08:17,166
Look here, nice round brown..
212
00:08:18,133 --> 00:08:19,166
...here's my number.
213
00:08:19,200 --> 00:08:21,100
I work over at APS.
214
00:08:21,133 --> 00:08:23,383
Don't forget the
name.
Shawn Williams.
215
00:08:24,160 --> 00:08:25,366
Oh, yeah,
I work the night
shift.
216
00:08:26,000 --> 00:08:28,250
I got a whole lotta room
in the back of my delivery
truck
217
00:08:28,283 --> 00:08:29,350
so, uh..
218
00:08:29,383 --> 00:08:32,160
...you can bring
the whole
package.
219
00:08:32,500 --> 00:08:34,500
Oh, honey, now you're talkin'.
220
00:08:34,830 --> 00:08:36,316
Doctor, this one's next.
221
00:08:39,166 --> 00:08:41,300
[screaming]
222
00:08:41,333 --> 00:08:43,000
I could kill you.
223
00:08:43,330 --> 00:08:46,000
God! Jeez, jeez, jeez!
224
00:08:46,330 --> 00:08:48,333
How much longer
is this gonna
be?
225
00:08:48,366 --> 00:08:50,283
We should be done
in another hour or two.
226
00:08:50,316 --> 00:08:52,000
An hour or two?
227
00:08:52,330 --> 00:08:53,150
Just kidding. All finished.
228
00:08:53,183 --> 00:08:54,366
Just a little proctology humor.
229
00:08:55,000 --> 00:08:56,266
Ha ha ha.
230
00:08:58,000 --> 00:09:00,300
You know, doc,
you really crack me up.
231
00:09:00,333 --> 00:09:02,316
[laughing]
232
00:09:04,830 --> 00:09:06,366
I hate being the butt
of your jokes.
233
00:09:08,300 --> 00:09:11,200
Hey, doc,
you can ass me anything.
234
00:09:13,200 --> 00:09:15,316
Good one. I got to tell
those
to the guys.
235
00:09:15,350 --> 00:09:17,000
Hey, well, you
know,
there's a..
236
00:09:17,330 --> 00:09:18,183
...whole
237
00:09:18,216 --> 00:09:20,116
where that came from.
238
00:09:20,150 --> 00:09:21,250
Am I finished yet, doc?
239
00:09:21,283 --> 00:09:24,500
Actually, no.
This does not look good to me.
240
00:09:24,830 --> 00:09:26,183
So Dr. Saunders is comin' down
to take a look at you.
241
00:09:26,216 --> 00:09:28,183
Saunders, Saunders.
242
00:09:28,216 --> 00:09:30,660
Damn, that name sounds familiar.
243
00:09:30,100 --> 00:09:32,366
Hey, is he a colonel?
244
00:09:33,000 --> 00:09:34,830
No, he's a doctor.
245
00:09:34,116 --> 00:09:36,000
The richest doctor
in this hospital too
246
00:09:36,330 --> 00:09:38,366
and, boy, I would love
to go out with his daughter.
247
00:09:39,366 --> 00:09:41,383
Daughter? Wait, wait, wait.
248
00:09:42,160 --> 00:09:44,500
Dr. Saunders,
his daughter's name
249
00:09:44,830 --> 00:09:46,216
wouldn't happen
to be Lisa, would it?
250
00:09:46,250 --> 00:09:49,316
- Yeah, you know her?
- Oh, God!
251
00:09:49,350 --> 00:09:51,200
Thanks, Bill,
I'll finish up in here.
252
00:09:51,233 --> 00:09:53,660
Anytime, doctor.
253
00:09:55,330 --> 00:09:57,500
Hello, Shawn, I'm Dr. Saunders.
254
00:09:58,660 --> 00:09:59,250
At last, we finally meet.
255
00:09:59,283 --> 00:10:01,266
[chuckling]
256
00:10:07,366 --> 00:10:08,383
So this is what it takes
257
00:10:09,160 --> 00:10:10,266
to finally meet
Shawn Williams, huh?
258
00:10:10,300 --> 00:10:12,830
If I'd known, I'd have come
by
and shot you myself
259
00:10:12,116 --> 00:10:14,316
with a staple gun.
260
00:10:14,350 --> 00:10:17,200
Oh, you know, doc,
I-I just been so busy at
work.
261
00:10:17,233 --> 00:10:21,500
Really? Too busy to meet
your girlfriend's father?
262
00:10:21,830 --> 00:10:22,100
So what is it you do?
263
00:10:22,133 --> 00:10:25,160
For all I know,
you're a delivery boy.
264
00:10:25,500 --> 00:10:27,200
A delivery boy?
Ping-pong, package.
265
00:10:29,366 --> 00:10:32,300
I'm serious. Lisa hasn't told me
very much about much about you.
266
00:10:32,333 --> 00:10:35,233
And you never came by to meet me
like a real man would.
267
00:10:35,266 --> 00:10:38,150
- So what is it you do?
- I, uh..
268
00:10:38,183 --> 00:10:41,160
I deal in all kinds of junk.
269
00:10:41,500 --> 00:10:42,500
Junk bonds?
270
00:10:42,830 --> 00:10:44,500
Okay.
271
00:10:44,830 --> 00:10:45,500
Oh.
272
00:10:45,830 --> 00:10:46,100
So you're a stockbroker.
273
00:10:46,133 --> 00:10:49,250
Hey, broke
is my middle name,
Jack.
274
00:10:49,283 --> 00:10:52,316
- Firm?
- I don't know, you tell me.
275
00:10:52,350 --> 00:10:54,300
No, what firm do you work for?
276
00:10:54,333 --> 00:10:58,830
Oh. Uh, the-the big one.
277
00:10:58,116 --> 00:11:00,830
- Merrill Lynch?
- E-exactly.
278
00:11:00,116 --> 00:11:01,300
How'd you know?
279
00:11:01,333 --> 00:11:04,160
Hey, you know, doc, I'm up
for a promotion over there.
280
00:11:04,500 --> 00:11:05,216
- A promotion?
- Yeah.
281
00:11:05,250 --> 00:11:08,233
Well, well, well, you
certainly
have come up in the world.
282
00:11:08,266 --> 00:11:11,100
Hey, like George and Weezy.
283
00:11:11,133 --> 00:11:14,183
I guess you're not really
the deadbeat I thought you
were.
284
00:11:14,216 --> 00:11:15,333
Thank you, doc.
285
00:11:15,366 --> 00:11:18,330
And if I may extend
the compliment to you
286
00:11:18,660 --> 00:11:21,000
you have some very,
very warm hands.
287
00:11:22,300 --> 00:11:25,000
Well, thank you, Shawn.
288
00:11:25,330 --> 00:11:27,200
Well, if you don't mind,
doc, I gotta be goin'.
289
00:11:27,233 --> 00:11:29,160
I got to get back over
to the office.
290
00:11:29,500 --> 00:11:31,166
I'm tryin' to get the name
Lynch out of the letterhead.
291
00:11:31,200 --> 00:11:33,116
You know, brothers
and the word Lynch
292
00:11:33,150 --> 00:11:34,133
don't get along too well.
293
00:11:34,166 --> 00:11:35,250
Son, not so fast, you know
294
00:11:35,283 --> 00:11:37,660
I really don't like
the way that looks.
295
00:11:37,100 --> 00:11:39,200
You should see me on the beach
in some speedos.
296
00:11:39,233 --> 00:11:41,250
Seriously, son, I want you
to stay here overnight
297
00:11:41,283 --> 00:11:42,250
for observation.
298
00:11:42,283 --> 00:11:43,383
Doc, I'm cool, I mean--
299
00:11:44,160 --> 00:11:44,366
I'll call Lisa
300
00:11:45,000 --> 00:11:46,183
and tell her that you're okay.
301
00:11:46,216 --> 00:11:47,366
I'm sure
she's gonna be surprised
302
00:11:48,000 --> 00:11:49,150
to find out we've met.
303
00:11:49,183 --> 00:11:51,116
I know.
304
00:11:51,150 --> 00:11:53,366
Not as surprised
as my brother's gonna be.
305
00:11:55,300 --> 00:11:57,000
I'll be right back to prep you
306
00:11:57,330 --> 00:11:59,116
and take you down to
surgery,
Mr. Heinz.
307
00:12:00,160 --> 00:12:01,500
Surgery?
308
00:12:01,830 --> 00:12:02,660
Aren't you Mr. Heinz
309
00:12:02,100 --> 00:12:03,183
who's having the vasectomy?
310
00:12:03,216 --> 00:12:04,383
No, I'm Shawn Williams.
311
00:12:05,160 --> 00:12:08,160
Then who's been movin'
the damn charts around
again?
312
00:12:11,250 --> 00:12:13,116
Marlon?
313
00:12:13,150 --> 00:12:14,366
Marlon?
314
00:12:15,000 --> 00:12:17,350
No! Marlon..
315
00:12:17,383 --> 00:12:19,283
Why?
316
00:12:21,660 --> 00:12:24,216
When you took him,
you took me!
317
00:12:24,250 --> 00:12:27,150
Shawn, quit the drama,
I'm over here.
318
00:12:27,183 --> 00:12:29,316
Oh. My bad.
319
00:12:31,830 --> 00:12:33,100
What's the matter,
why'd you call? You
okay?
320
00:12:33,133 --> 00:12:36,330
Shawn, I did a bad thing.
You know, your ID?
321
00:12:36,660 --> 00:12:37,366
Oh, don't tell me
they know who you really
are.
322
00:12:38,000 --> 00:12:40,266
No...the problem's
with my doctor.
323
00:12:42,160 --> 00:12:44,660
Did he touch you somewhere?
324
00:12:46,366 --> 00:12:50,200
No, Shawn. Does the name
Saunders ring a bell?
325
00:12:50,233 --> 00:12:51,366
Saunders.
326
00:12:52,000 --> 00:12:53,283
Is that that white
dude
with the seven
spices
327
00:12:53,316 --> 00:12:56,160
that fries chicken?
328
00:12:56,500 --> 00:12:58,200
No, Dr. Saunders.
329
00:12:58,233 --> 00:13:00,383
- Lisa's father?
- Yeah, Lisa's father?
330
00:13:01,160 --> 00:13:04,660
- He thinks I'm you.
- What?
331
00:13:04,100 --> 00:13:07,116
Oh, man! I knew I should've
never given you that card.
332
00:13:07,150 --> 00:13:08,200
Lucky thing you did.
333
00:13:08,233 --> 00:13:10,000
Thanks to me,
Dr. Saunders thinks
334
00:13:10,330 --> 00:13:12,266
you're a stockbroker
at, uh, Merrill Lynch.
335
00:13:12,300 --> 00:13:15,283
- Why does he think that?
- 'Cause I told him that.
336
00:13:15,316 --> 00:13:17,133
See, I figured
we should impress him.
337
00:13:17,166 --> 00:13:19,350
I know how sensitive you are
about that delivery thing.
338
00:13:19,383 --> 00:13:22,100
Oh, my God!
What am I gonna do, man?
339
00:13:24,330 --> 00:13:26,183
Here. Quick, put this gown on.
340
00:13:26,216 --> 00:13:27,266
That's not gonna solve anything.
341
00:13:27,300 --> 00:13:29,383
No, stupid!
Dr. Saunders is comin'.
342
00:13:33,500 --> 00:13:34,366
- How are you feelin', Shawn?
- Fine.
343
00:13:35,000 --> 00:13:37,000
- 'I said Shawn.'
- Oh, my bad.
344
00:13:37,330 --> 00:13:40,000
He's been talkin'
in his sleep all
mornin'.
345
00:13:40,330 --> 00:13:41,500
Well, I've been
doin' my rounds..
346
00:13:41,830 --> 00:13:42,300
Oh, have you seen
my princess yet?
347
00:13:42,333 --> 00:13:44,250
Not yet, Dave.
348
00:13:44,283 --> 00:13:46,830
You know, Shawn, I was
thinkin',
we should all go out
349
00:13:46,116 --> 00:13:47,266
and celebrate
your big promotion.
350
00:13:47,300 --> 00:13:50,160
I'd love to, Davey old boy.
351
00:13:50,500 --> 00:13:51,233
You like Tavern On The Green?
352
00:13:51,266 --> 00:13:53,300
I like hot sauce on my greens.
353
00:13:56,330 --> 00:13:57,500
Alright, it's a date.
354
00:13:57,830 --> 00:13:58,133
- Okay.
- I'll see you later.
355
00:13:58,166 --> 00:14:00,100
Alright.
356
00:14:00,133 --> 00:14:01,300
- Hey, Dr. Saunders?
- Yeah.
357
00:14:01,333 --> 00:14:04,283
Anybody ever tell you
you look like Shaft?
358
00:14:04,316 --> 00:14:06,200
Shut your mouth.
359
00:14:10,830 --> 00:14:11,166
Marlon, I'm gonna kill you, man!
360
00:14:11,200 --> 00:14:12,300
Why'd you tell him
I'm a big success?
361
00:14:12,333 --> 00:14:13,366
Because, Shawn,
it sounded better than
362
00:14:14,000 --> 00:14:15,350
I'm a broke-ass delivery boy.
363
00:14:15,383 --> 00:14:18,200
You're an idiot, man! Don't
you
see you ruined everything?
364
00:14:18,233 --> 00:14:21,330
Now I'm never gonna get a chance
to meet her father.
365
00:14:21,660 --> 00:14:22,266
Yeah, well, you're the one
that was too embarrassed
366
00:14:22,300 --> 00:14:24,283
to tell him that-that
you was a delivery boy
367
00:14:24,316 --> 00:14:26,183
in the first place. Chicken.
368
00:14:26,216 --> 00:14:28,330
Hey, I ain't no chicken.
369
00:14:28,660 --> 00:14:29,133
Shawn, Lisa!
370
00:14:29,166 --> 00:14:31,216
Oh, my, God!
What are we gonna do?
371
00:14:31,250 --> 00:14:33,233
Here. Quick. Switch beds.
372
00:14:33,266 --> 00:14:35,100
- Oh, man, come on.
- Come on.
373
00:14:35,133 --> 00:14:38,116
- Hurry up!
- I'm-I'm comin', I'm goin'.
374
00:14:38,150 --> 00:14:40,116
I got you.
375
00:14:40,150 --> 00:14:41,350
Baby, are you alright?
376
00:14:41,383 --> 00:14:45,183
Ah, yeah. I'm just
a little tired, that's all.
377
00:14:45,216 --> 00:14:47,183
Well, at least you got
to finally meet my
daddy.
378
00:14:47,216 --> 00:14:49,830
I told you
it wouldn't be so bad.
379
00:14:49,116 --> 00:14:51,316
He likes you.
He really, really likes you.
380
00:14:51,350 --> 00:14:55,500
Yeah, well, he hasn't gotten
to know the real me yet.
381
00:14:55,830 --> 00:14:56,250
What are you talkin' about?
382
00:14:56,283 --> 00:14:59,660
He got to see
your little pumpkin buns.
383
00:15:00,100 --> 00:15:01,150
Pumpkin buns?
384
00:15:01,183 --> 00:15:03,316
[laughing]
385
00:15:05,150 --> 00:15:06,283
What's wrong with that guy?
386
00:15:06,316 --> 00:15:08,250
He got brain damage.
387
00:15:08,283 --> 00:15:11,500
Yeah, his brother beat him
over the head with a pipe
388
00:15:11,830 --> 00:15:12,183
for messing up his life.
389
00:15:12,216 --> 00:15:15,000
I cannot believe
that you're in the hospital
390
00:15:15,330 --> 00:15:16,383
because you sat on a staple gun.
391
00:15:17,160 --> 00:15:18,200
That is so stupid,
it sounds like
392
00:15:18,233 --> 00:15:20,283
somethin' Marlon would do.
393
00:15:22,183 --> 00:15:23,283
Ah, there's my princess.
394
00:15:23,316 --> 00:15:26,200
- How are you, sweetheart?
- Daddy!
395
00:15:26,233 --> 00:15:28,000
You takin' good care
of my Shawn?
396
00:15:28,330 --> 00:15:29,150
Well, I've done my part.
397
00:15:29,183 --> 00:15:31,266
Now all he needs is
a little tender lovin'
care.
398
00:15:31,300 --> 00:15:33,830
- Well, I'll do my best.
- Good.
399
00:15:33,116 --> 00:15:34,283
Good. Alright,
I'll be right back.
Listen.
400
00:15:34,316 --> 00:15:36,300
I'm gonna go check
on
his test results.
401
00:15:36,333 --> 00:15:37,333
See you later, Shawn.
402
00:15:37,366 --> 00:15:39,383
- See you, doc.
- See you, doc.
403
00:15:43,330 --> 00:15:44,266
I know what would
make you feel better.
404
00:15:44,300 --> 00:15:47,250
How about a nice shoulder
massage, would you like
that?
405
00:15:47,283 --> 00:15:49,283
Mm-hmm.
406
00:15:49,316 --> 00:15:50,366
Mm..
407
00:15:51,000 --> 00:15:53,150
Ooh, God, have you been
losin' weight?
408
00:15:53,183 --> 00:15:54,350
Mm-hmm.
409
00:15:54,383 --> 00:15:57,366
You've been working so hard,
I can feel your little ribs.
410
00:15:58,000 --> 00:16:00,100
Mm-hmm.
411
00:16:00,133 --> 00:16:02,333
You just needed a little love
and attention, didn't you?
412
00:16:02,366 --> 00:16:04,133
Mm-hmm.
413
00:16:04,166 --> 00:16:06,300
Oh, my God,
that guy fell off the bed!
414
00:16:06,333 --> 00:16:08,830
I'm gonna get a nurse.
415
00:16:08,116 --> 00:16:10,330
Nurse! Nurse!
416
00:16:10,383 --> 00:16:12,330
Boy, switch beds.
417
00:16:12,660 --> 00:16:13,200
If she gonna be
rubbin' on
anybody
418
00:16:13,233 --> 00:16:15,160
it's gonna be me.
419
00:16:15,500 --> 00:16:17,183
Look at you, I finally get
some attention from somebody
420
00:16:17,216 --> 00:16:19,350
and you can't handle it.
421
00:16:19,383 --> 00:16:21,830
Stay outside, miss.
422
00:16:21,116 --> 00:16:24,160
- Mr. Heinz, are you alright?
- Mr. Heinz?
423
00:16:24,500 --> 00:16:25,383
Oh, lady, you got it all
wrong.
I ain't Mr. Heinz.
424
00:16:26,160 --> 00:16:28,350
Oh, yes, you are. It says so
right here on this chart.
425
00:16:28,383 --> 00:16:31,116
And it's time to take you down
for your vasectomy.
426
00:16:31,150 --> 00:16:33,283
Vasectomy? No, no, no,
look, I changed my mind.
427
00:16:33,316 --> 00:16:34,350
I don't want the operation.
428
00:16:34,383 --> 00:16:36,350
Too late.
We already booked the room.
429
00:16:36,383 --> 00:16:39,216
No! I don't wanna be stubby!
430
00:16:39,250 --> 00:16:41,000
'I don't wanna be stubby!'
431
00:16:41,330 --> 00:16:44,133
Help me! Help me, please! Help!
432
00:16:44,166 --> 00:16:47,100
Did you hear that? That guy's
gonna have a vasectomy.
433
00:16:47,133 --> 00:16:50,660
Good, he don't look like
the kind that should
reproduce.
434
00:16:51,316 --> 00:16:53,216
Shawn, what happened to you?
435
00:16:53,250 --> 00:16:54,333
Lisa's father
called
looking for her
436
00:16:54,366 --> 00:16:56,166
and I came right down.
437
00:16:56,200 --> 00:16:58,830
He sat on a staple gun.
438
00:16:58,116 --> 00:16:59,183
You too?
439
00:16:59,216 --> 00:17:00,300
What do you mean him too?
440
00:17:00,333 --> 00:17:02,116
Well, Marlon sat on one.
441
00:17:02,150 --> 00:17:03,366
Everybody's sittin' on 'em.
442
00:17:04,000 --> 00:17:06,166
See, it must be a fad,
you know?
443
00:17:06,200 --> 00:17:09,000
Just like that nipple
piercing.
See here. Look here.
444
00:17:16,366 --> 00:17:18,316
Pop, what are you doin', man?
445
00:17:18,350 --> 00:17:20,133
Tryin' to keep up with the time.
446
00:17:20,166 --> 00:17:22,183
Oh, don't worry, baby,
these are, these are
clip-ons.
447
00:17:22,216 --> 00:17:24,183
They drive your mama crazy!
448
00:17:24,216 --> 00:17:25,383
(Shawn)
'Pop! Stop!'
449
00:17:26,160 --> 00:17:27,283
'Pop, come on, man.'
450
00:17:27,316 --> 00:17:29,200
Daddy, um..
451
00:17:29,233 --> 00:17:32,266
I want you
to meet Shawn's father.
452
00:17:32,300 --> 00:17:33,350
This is my big daddy.
453
00:17:33,383 --> 00:17:36,250
- How do you do?
- Good to meet you, sir.
454
00:17:36,283 --> 00:17:38,116
Your son is one fine man.
455
00:17:38,150 --> 00:17:40,350
(Marlon)
Help me! Help me, please! Help!
456
00:17:44,000 --> 00:17:45,266
A-a-a..
457
00:17:45,300 --> 00:17:48,330
And your daughter's
not too shabby neither.
458
00:17:48,660 --> 00:17:49,250
Well, thank you.
459
00:17:51,500 --> 00:17:53,333
Well, what do you say
we take a look here,
son?
460
00:17:53,366 --> 00:17:56,183
- Oh, my God.
- Whoa!
461
00:17:56,216 --> 00:17:59,500
That's the fastest
recovery
I've ever seen.
462
00:17:59,830 --> 00:18:01,216
What's going on here?
That's not Shawn's butt.
463
00:18:01,250 --> 00:18:03,116
Yes, it is.
464
00:18:03,150 --> 00:18:05,166
I mean it could be.
465
00:18:06,233 --> 00:18:07,350
I mean it looks th-the way
466
00:18:07,383 --> 00:18:09,383
I always pictured
it would look,
daddy.
467
00:18:10,160 --> 00:18:11,150
Oh, no, no, no,
that's Shawn's butt, alright.
468
00:18:11,183 --> 00:18:14,330
See, Shawn got a cute
little butt like his daddy.
469
00:18:14,660 --> 00:18:16,160
I know what I saw,
and that's not Shawn's butt.
470
00:18:16,500 --> 00:18:19,660
No, no, no, Marlon's got
the little bony behind.
471
00:18:19,100 --> 00:18:21,266
His butt's so bony, it look
like two eggs in a paper bag.
472
00:18:21,300 --> 00:18:23,266
Help me! Help me, please!
473
00:18:23,300 --> 00:18:25,150
Help me!
They're tryin' to shave
me!
474
00:18:25,183 --> 00:18:26,333
- Shawn?
- Dr. Saunders?
475
00:18:26,366 --> 00:18:28,166
- Marlon?
- Marlon?
476
00:18:28,200 --> 00:18:30,000
- Shawn!
- Marlon!
477
00:18:30,330 --> 00:18:31,133
- Lisa?
- Shawn?
478
00:18:31,166 --> 00:18:33,000
- Lisa?
- Shawn?
479
00:18:33,330 --> 00:18:35,333
- Pops.
- Marlon?
480
00:18:35,366 --> 00:18:39,266
- Mr. Heinz!
- No-o!
481
00:18:39,300 --> 00:18:41,660
Help me! Help me, please!
482
00:18:41,100 --> 00:18:42,383
'Help me! Help me, please!'
483
00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:46,350
What is going
on
in this room?
484
00:18:47,000 --> 00:18:48,233
Everybody's lost their mind
in this room!
485
00:18:48,266 --> 00:18:49,350
That's what's goin' on.
486
00:18:49,383 --> 00:18:51,150
Hold up. Wait a minute.
Wait a minute.
487
00:18:51,183 --> 00:18:53,133
I can explain everything.
488
00:18:53,166 --> 00:18:55,383
Dr. Saunders,
I'm Shawn Williams.
489
00:18:56,160 --> 00:18:57,216
Marlon's my little brother.
490
00:18:57,250 --> 00:18:58,383
I loaned him my insurance card
491
00:18:59,160 --> 00:19:00,233
so he could get
some medical attention.
492
00:19:00,266 --> 00:19:02,500
Smart thinking!
493
00:19:04,116 --> 00:19:06,100
I mean shame on you.
494
00:19:07,316 --> 00:19:10,000
So you're the
stockbroker
for Merrill Lynch?
495
00:19:10,330 --> 00:19:12,250
What? I ain't
no damn stockbroker.
496
00:19:12,283 --> 00:19:15,133
Well, what do you do?
497
00:19:15,166 --> 00:19:17,233
I deliver packages for APS.
498
00:19:17,266 --> 00:19:19,200
No, no, no, really.
499
00:19:19,233 --> 00:19:20,350
Really, I'm a delivery man.
500
00:19:20,383 --> 00:19:23,100
You know, "Ding-dong, package!"
501
00:19:25,383 --> 00:19:29,660
And that's probably why
I was afraid to meet you.
502
00:19:29,100 --> 00:19:31,660
But, hey, I ain't got
nothin' to be ashamed of
503
00:19:31,100 --> 00:19:32,233
'cause I got a good job.
504
00:19:32,266 --> 00:19:35,283
And I got dreams. Big dreams.
505
00:19:35,316 --> 00:19:38,000
And one day, with my dreams
506
00:19:38,330 --> 00:19:39,333
and Lisa's love..
507
00:19:39,366 --> 00:19:42,133
...I'm gonna run this town.
508
00:19:42,166 --> 00:19:46,500
I-I'm sorry. What did you say
after "I'm an APS man?"
509
00:19:47,166 --> 00:19:49,233
Hey, w-w-wait a minute,
Dr. Saunders.
510
00:19:49,266 --> 00:19:53,100
Don't you be lookin' down
your sedity big nose at my
son.
511
00:19:53,133 --> 00:19:55,116
He's a good man, honest man
512
00:19:55,150 --> 00:19:56,233
and a hard-working man.
513
00:19:56,266 --> 00:19:58,383
- A delivery man!
- And I love him.
514
00:19:59,160 --> 00:20:00,316
And that should
be
enough for you.
515
00:20:00,350 --> 00:20:02,660
That's right.
516
00:20:02,100 --> 00:20:03,233
Lisa could do a lot worse.
517
00:20:03,266 --> 00:20:05,150
Help me! Help me, please!
518
00:20:05,183 --> 00:20:07,200
Help me! Help me, please!
519
00:20:07,233 --> 00:20:09,266
And I mean a whole lot worse.
520
00:20:10,250 --> 00:20:11,266
I guess you're right.
521
00:20:11,300 --> 00:20:12,383
Dr. Saunders, help me!
522
00:20:13,160 --> 00:20:14,100
They're tryin' to neuter me.
523
00:20:14,133 --> 00:20:16,233
I don't want to be a eunuch.
Please!
524
00:20:16,266 --> 00:20:18,350
Don't worry, Mr. Heinz,
this'll calm you down.
525
00:20:18,383 --> 00:20:22,150
- You won't feel a thing.
- Oh, man. Oh!
526
00:20:22,183 --> 00:20:25,116
Please, y'all tell them
I'm not Mr. Heinz!
527
00:20:25,150 --> 00:20:27,660
Help me. Help me, please!
528
00:20:29,330 --> 00:20:31,233
Why don't y'all tell 'em
I'm not Mr. Heinz?
529
00:20:31,266 --> 00:20:33,183
[all whistling]
530
00:20:33,216 --> 00:20:35,350
Help me! Help me, please!
531
00:20:35,383 --> 00:20:38,000
Help me! Ohh!
532
00:20:38,330 --> 00:20:39,366
[all whistling]
533
00:20:41,133 --> 00:20:44,160
Alright, alright,
let's go get him. Come on.
534
00:20:44,500 --> 00:20:45,300
Yeah. Let's go.
535
00:20:50,283 --> 00:20:53,383
Well, Shawn, I'm glad you got
to finally meet my father.
536
00:20:54,160 --> 00:20:56,350
Yeah, things turned out
pretty good after all.
537
00:20:56,383 --> 00:20:59,160
I mean your father
finally
knows what I do.
538
00:20:59,500 --> 00:21:00,233
Pops got insurance for Marlon.
539
00:21:00,266 --> 00:21:01,383
Well, I'm glad you're happy.
540
00:21:02,160 --> 00:21:03,250
That damn medical insurance
is gonna send me
541
00:21:03,283 --> 00:21:04,266
to the poorhouse.
542
00:21:04,300 --> 00:21:05,383
How come, pop?
543
00:21:06,160 --> 00:21:07,200
Because not only
do I have to cover
you
544
00:21:07,233 --> 00:21:08,366
I have to cover Benny.
545
00:21:09,000 --> 00:21:09,383
In case you've never noticed
546
00:21:10,160 --> 00:21:11,216
Benny has a few dependents.
547
00:21:11,250 --> 00:21:14,000
[indistinct chatter]
548
00:21:14,330 --> 00:21:16,283
I know. I know.
You've been married three
times.
549
00:21:20,330 --> 00:21:23,830
Shawn, there you are.
They said I'd find you here.
550
00:21:23,116 --> 00:21:25,330
Hey, I don't even
know you, freak.
551
00:21:25,660 --> 00:21:27,333
I'm not talkin' to you,
raisin-head.
552
00:21:27,366 --> 00:21:30,660
I'm talkin'
to the good-lookin' one.
553
00:21:30,100 --> 00:21:33,160
Shawn! Get over here, hot stuff.
554
00:21:33,500 --> 00:21:37,330
I got my brother's truck
and the whole night off!
555
00:21:37,660 --> 00:21:39,100
We're gonna rock 'n'
roll.
Come on, baby!
556
00:21:39,133 --> 00:21:41,333
I don't like rock 'n' roll,
only hip-hop.
557
00:21:41,366 --> 00:21:43,300
No.
558
00:21:43,333 --> 00:21:44,350
Bye-bye!
559
00:21:44,383 --> 00:21:48,160
- Bye-bye, macaroni.
- Macaroni.
560
00:21:48,500 --> 00:21:50,116
Macaroni, she's gonna
mac your roni.
561
00:21:54,333 --> 00:21:56,150
Clear.
562
00:21:58,216 --> 00:22:00,150
[groaning]
563
00:22:00,183 --> 00:22:01,250
You okay, Pops?
564
00:22:01,283 --> 00:22:04,100
Yeah. Yeah. This is great!
565
00:22:04,133 --> 00:22:06,316
- Good, good, now you do me.
- Okay. Okay.
566
00:22:10,383 --> 00:22:12,500
Clear!
567
00:22:13,316 --> 00:22:15,300
Dr. Saunders?
568
00:22:15,333 --> 00:22:17,366
Dr. Saunders?
569
00:22:24,133 --> 00:22:26,100
(Shawn)Look up, Marlon. Say cheese!
40223
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