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1
00:00:06,907 --> 00:00:09,009
Fhi-de-ho, top cop.
2
00:00:14,515 --> 00:00:15,916
Steve.
3
00:00:15,983 --> 00:00:17,785
Yippee.
4
00:00:20,488 --> 00:00:22,923
I'm looking for laura.
Is she en casa?
5
00:00:22,990 --> 00:00:25,093
She's out, and
She made me promise
6
00:00:25,159 --> 00:00:28,362
Not to tell you
Where she was.
7
00:00:28,429 --> 00:00:29,330
I see.
8
00:00:29,397 --> 00:00:31,799
Well, this time,
I'm prepared.
9
00:00:33,201 --> 00:00:34,935
What is that
Under your arm?
10
00:00:35,002 --> 00:00:35,969
Hair.
11
00:00:36,036 --> 00:00:38,038
[laughs and snorts]
12
00:00:39,073 --> 00:00:41,975
Actually, it's
A photo cd player.
13
00:00:42,042 --> 00:00:44,345
Since you won't
Tell me where
Laura is,
14
00:00:44,412 --> 00:00:46,647
I'll just entertain
You with photos
15
00:00:46,714 --> 00:00:49,983
Of my trip to
The wisconsin
Cheese festival.
16
00:00:50,050 --> 00:00:52,220
Oh, god, no.
17
00:00:52,286 --> 00:00:54,488
And the beauty
Of this baby is,
18
00:00:54,555 --> 00:00:57,791
Each disk can hold
Hundreds of photos.
19
00:00:57,858 --> 00:00:59,527
Oh, no.
20
00:01:06,434 --> 00:01:07,735
Alright.
21
00:01:10,738 --> 00:01:13,474
That's me
About to leave
For my dream trip.
22
00:01:13,541 --> 00:01:16,009
My head is
Starting to throb.
23
00:01:16,076 --> 00:01:18,446
Here I am with herman,
The king of crackers
24
00:01:18,512 --> 00:01:21,749
And cindy lou huckstaff,
The cheese queen.
25
00:01:21,815 --> 00:01:24,618
Now it's chest pains.
26
00:01:24,685 --> 00:01:28,789
And now let's see
All 483 of the cheeses
27
00:01:28,856 --> 00:01:30,458
That were entered.
28
00:01:35,296 --> 00:01:39,300
We'll start with
A chipper cheddar.
29
00:01:39,367 --> 00:01:43,171
Now a succulent swiss.
30
00:01:43,237 --> 00:01:45,606
A bodacious brie.
31
00:01:47,875 --> 00:01:49,610
Steve, please.
32
00:01:50,744 --> 00:01:52,313
A gregarious gouda.
33
00:01:52,380 --> 00:01:54,282
A magnificent muenster.
34
00:01:54,348 --> 00:01:56,049
A romantic romano.
35
00:01:56,116 --> 00:01:58,319
Ooh! A perky parmesan!
36
00:01:58,386 --> 00:02:00,053
She's at the mall!
37
00:02:00,120 --> 00:02:02,122
She'll be there till 5:00!
38
00:02:02,190 --> 00:02:05,559
Pink top, jeans,
Black boots, and a purse!
39
00:02:11,031 --> 00:02:13,133
I knew you'd crack.
40
00:02:25,078 --> 00:02:26,847
* it's a rare condition *
41
00:02:26,914 --> 00:02:28,549
* in this day and age *
42
00:02:28,616 --> 00:02:31,852
* to read any good news
On the newspaper page *
43
00:02:31,919 --> 00:02:35,523
* and love and tradition
Of the grand design *
44
00:02:35,589 --> 00:02:39,960
* some people say
Is even harder to find *
45
00:02:40,027 --> 00:02:43,231
* well, then there must
Be some magic clue *
46
00:02:43,297 --> 00:02:47,368
* inside these
Gentle walls *
47
00:02:47,435 --> 00:02:50,804
* 'cause all I see
Is a tower of dreams *
48
00:02:50,871 --> 00:02:54,842
* real love burstin'
Out of every seam *
49
00:02:55,909 --> 00:02:58,979
* as days go by *
50
00:02:59,046 --> 00:03:03,684
* it's the bigger love
Of the family **
51
00:03:15,062 --> 00:03:17,231
Okay, ma...
52
00:03:17,298 --> 00:03:20,100
I'll see your eternity
53
00:03:20,167 --> 00:03:22,970
And raise you a giorgio.
54
00:03:24,672 --> 00:03:26,106
Okay...
55
00:03:26,173 --> 00:03:28,175
I'll see your giorgio
56
00:03:28,242 --> 00:03:31,312
And raise you
A l'air du temps.
57
00:03:32,513 --> 00:03:35,583
Too rich
For my blood.
58
00:03:35,649 --> 00:03:37,685
Here's your
L'air du temps,
59
00:03:37,751 --> 00:03:40,087
And I'll bump you
A chloe.
60
00:03:40,153 --> 00:03:42,089
Ah-ah-ah-ah. No fair.
61
00:03:42,155 --> 00:03:43,357
That's eau de toilette.
62
00:03:43,424 --> 00:03:45,826
We're betting
Parfums here.
63
00:03:48,362 --> 00:03:51,265
Okay, white diamonds.
64
00:03:51,332 --> 00:03:54,402
I call.
What do you got?
65
00:03:54,468 --> 00:03:56,337
A straight.
Read 'em and weep.
66
00:03:56,404 --> 00:04:00,173
Ah-ah. No, no.
Not so fast, slick.
67
00:04:00,240 --> 00:04:04,745
I'm feeling
A little...Flushed.
68
00:04:09,216 --> 00:04:10,651
If I didn't know any better,
69
00:04:10,718 --> 00:04:14,388
I'd swear she was packing
Aces in her pantyhose.
70
00:04:16,424 --> 00:04:18,526
* for he's
A jolly good fellow *
71
00:04:18,592 --> 00:04:21,629
* for he's
A jolly good fellow *
72
00:04:21,695 --> 00:04:24,698
* which nobody
Can deny **
73
00:04:24,765 --> 00:04:25,699
What's going on?
74
00:04:25,766 --> 00:04:29,136
Big news, harriette!
Big, wonderful news!
75
00:04:29,202 --> 00:04:30,671
Tell her, son.
Well--
76
00:04:30,738 --> 00:04:32,873
He got accepted to
Chicago university!
77
00:04:32,940 --> 00:04:34,174
Yes!
Ooh!
78
00:04:34,241 --> 00:04:36,009
Ahh!
79
00:04:38,145 --> 00:04:39,480
When'd you find out?
80
00:04:39,547 --> 00:04:40,948
Tell her, son.
Well--
81
00:04:41,014 --> 00:04:42,883
This afternoon!
82
00:04:42,950 --> 00:04:44,918
Ah! Oh!
83
00:04:44,985 --> 00:04:45,953
And there's more.
84
00:04:46,019 --> 00:04:47,220
Tell them
The best part.
85
00:04:47,287 --> 00:04:50,524
Well--
He got a scholarship, harriette!
86
00:04:51,692 --> 00:04:52,926
Ohh.
87
00:04:56,864 --> 00:04:57,965
Come on, everybody.
88
00:04:58,031 --> 00:05:00,267
Let's go celebrate
With some
Hot fudge sundaes!
89
00:05:00,334 --> 00:05:02,102
Oh, I'm so proud
Of you, eddie.
90
00:05:02,169 --> 00:05:03,737
Thanks, grandma.
91
00:05:03,804 --> 00:05:05,973
We're all proud
Of you, son.
92
00:05:06,039 --> 00:05:08,809
My son is going
To college.
93
00:05:08,876 --> 00:05:10,210
You know,
When you get your degree,
94
00:05:10,277 --> 00:05:12,980
You'll be able
To write your own ticket.
95
00:05:28,295 --> 00:05:32,132
Carl, that's your fourth
Hot fudge sundae.
96
00:05:32,199 --> 00:05:32,866
So?
97
00:05:32,933 --> 00:05:34,167
I'm celebrating.
98
00:05:34,234 --> 00:05:37,438
I'm basking in
My son's glory.
99
00:05:37,505 --> 00:05:40,574
You keep eating like that,
You'll be wallowing in it.
100
00:05:40,641 --> 00:05:42,676
Oh, lighten up,
Jenny craig.
101
00:05:43,877 --> 00:05:47,180
I'll have you know
This hot fudge
Is nonfat.
102
00:05:47,247 --> 00:05:48,516
The ice cream is nonfat.
103
00:05:48,582 --> 00:05:50,718
And the sprinkles on top
Are nonfat.
104
00:05:50,784 --> 00:05:53,554
Everything in here
Is nonfat.
105
00:05:53,621 --> 00:05:55,923
Except the container.
106
00:06:00,327 --> 00:06:02,262
Very nice, harriette.
107
00:06:02,329 --> 00:06:04,532
Very, very nice.
108
00:06:04,598 --> 00:06:07,735
Those charm school lessons
Really paid off.
109
00:06:09,336 --> 00:06:11,772
Oh, carl, guess
Who I saw today.
110
00:06:11,839 --> 00:06:12,640
Who?
111
00:06:12,706 --> 00:06:14,207
Sergeant carnelli's
Wife.
112
00:06:14,274 --> 00:06:16,810
Oh. Nelly carnelli?
Mm-hmm.
113
00:06:16,877 --> 00:06:18,646
She told me that
Charlie was studying
114
00:06:18,712 --> 00:06:20,881
For the lieutenant's exam.
115
00:06:20,948 --> 00:06:22,950
Oh. Really?
116
00:06:23,016 --> 00:06:26,186
Yeah. She asked me
If you were going
To take the test.
117
00:06:26,253 --> 00:06:28,822
And what did you say,
Harriette?
118
00:06:28,889 --> 00:06:30,223
Well, I didn't
Know what to say.
119
00:06:30,290 --> 00:06:32,860
I just said,
Well, uh...
120
00:06:39,567 --> 00:06:41,802
Well, I'm not taking
That test, harriette.
121
00:06:41,869 --> 00:06:43,937
Really?
But why not, carl?
122
00:06:44,004 --> 00:06:49,743
Oh, will you puh-leez
Give it a rest?
123
00:06:49,810 --> 00:06:50,944
What?
124
00:06:51,011 --> 00:06:53,714
Harriette, you're latching
Onto this like a pit bull!
125
00:06:53,781 --> 00:06:55,849
Let go of it,
For goodness sakes.
126
00:06:55,916 --> 00:06:58,686
Carl, what are you
Talking about?
127
00:06:58,752 --> 00:07:01,622
Harriette,
Stop nagging me.
128
00:07:01,689 --> 00:07:03,156
Carl, why are you
So upset?
129
00:07:03,223 --> 00:07:05,693
I'm not upset!
130
00:07:05,759 --> 00:07:07,928
I'm going
For a walk!
131
00:07:12,800 --> 00:07:15,669
But first
I'm going to bed.
132
00:07:22,976 --> 00:07:24,177
Here ye be.
133
00:07:24,244 --> 00:07:27,948
Two chicken cheddar weenies,
Two chili cheese fries
134
00:07:28,015 --> 00:07:31,084
And a yummy chocolate shake
For your daughter.
135
00:07:31,151 --> 00:07:33,353
Um, she's not my daughter.
136
00:07:33,420 --> 00:07:35,656
Granddaughter?
Mm-mm.
137
00:07:35,723 --> 00:07:37,658
A niece?
Mm-mm.
138
00:07:37,725 --> 00:07:38,926
I'm his girlfriend.
139
00:07:38,992 --> 00:07:39,960
[snorts]
140
00:07:43,564 --> 00:07:44,665
Oh.
141
00:07:44,732 --> 00:07:46,299
Well, well,
Have a nice day.
142
00:07:46,366 --> 00:07:49,970
And perhaps you shouldn't
Cross any state lines.
143
00:07:55,776 --> 00:07:59,012
Okay, everybody,
It's closing time.
144
00:08:00,447 --> 00:08:03,083
Hey, eddo,
It's friday night, my man,
145
00:08:03,150 --> 00:08:06,520
And I'm feeling
A little wild and crazy.
146
00:08:06,587 --> 00:08:07,788
Really?
Yeah.
147
00:08:07,855 --> 00:08:10,457
What do you say
We all pile into the isetta,
148
00:08:10,524 --> 00:08:12,259
Cruise on down
To lake michigan,
149
00:08:12,325 --> 00:08:15,629
And skip some stones?
150
00:08:15,696 --> 00:08:16,897
No, thanks, steve.
151
00:08:16,964 --> 00:08:19,633
I don't want my weekend
To peak that early.
152
00:08:19,700 --> 00:08:22,402
You got a point.
153
00:08:22,469 --> 00:08:25,438
Hey, waldo, you feel
Like doing something?
154
00:08:25,505 --> 00:08:28,041
Nah, I'm going home.
Aw, come on, man.
155
00:08:28,108 --> 00:08:31,178
Let's take our
Minimum wage and
Have some maximum fun.
156
00:08:31,244 --> 00:08:34,347
Look, mr. Fancy pants,
B.M.O.C. College dude,
157
00:08:34,414 --> 00:08:35,883
Let's stop
Playing games.
158
00:08:35,949 --> 00:08:37,350
Let's turn our cards
Face up
159
00:08:37,417 --> 00:08:41,288
And call a turkey
A chicken.
160
00:08:41,354 --> 00:08:42,590
What?
161
00:08:42,656 --> 00:08:44,892
Waldo, you got
Some kind of
Problem with me?
162
00:08:44,958 --> 00:08:47,227
Yeah. I got
A big prob, bob.
163
00:08:47,294 --> 00:08:48,862
You going off
To college.
164
00:08:48,929 --> 00:08:50,197
You'll be doing new
And exciting things
165
00:08:50,263 --> 00:08:51,932
While I'm stuck
Back here in a rut.
166
00:08:51,999 --> 00:08:53,834
Rut?
Don't repeat me.
167
00:08:53,901 --> 00:08:57,237
I heard myself
The first time.
168
00:08:57,304 --> 00:08:58,739
Come on, waldo.
169
00:08:58,806 --> 00:09:01,208
I mean, you'll be
Doing fun stuff, too.
170
00:09:01,274 --> 00:09:02,442
Oh, really?
171
00:09:02,509 --> 00:09:03,744
Will I be pouring
Mr. Bubble
172
00:09:03,811 --> 00:09:05,478
In the university
Swimming pool?
173
00:09:05,545 --> 00:09:07,915
Will I be scoping honeys
In tight sweaters?
174
00:09:07,981 --> 00:09:09,516
Will I be seeing how
Many of my frat brothers
175
00:09:09,583 --> 00:09:11,318
Can fit in
A pay toilet?
176
00:09:13,654 --> 00:09:16,189
No, sir. No higher
Education for me.
177
00:09:22,996 --> 00:09:25,866
But, waldo, you could
Go to college, too.
178
00:09:25,933 --> 00:09:29,803
With a 1.0
Grade average?
179
00:09:29,870 --> 00:09:32,640
Ooh. That's higher
Than I thought.
180
00:09:37,177 --> 00:09:39,713
The point is,
You're going to move
On with your life
181
00:09:39,780 --> 00:09:42,149
And forget all about me,
So it'll hurt a lot less
182
00:09:42,215 --> 00:09:44,818
If we just end our
Friendship right now.
183
00:09:59,166 --> 00:10:02,502
Hey, good looking.
Still booking?
184
00:10:02,569 --> 00:10:04,104
What do you want, steve?
185
00:10:04,171 --> 00:10:05,205
It's saturday night.
186
00:10:05,272 --> 00:10:07,574
What do you say
We pile into the isetta,
187
00:10:07,641 --> 00:10:09,542
Cruise on down
To carpet city,
188
00:10:09,609 --> 00:10:12,680
And search the dumpsters
For remnants?
189
00:10:14,214 --> 00:10:17,317
Oh, just...Go home.
190
00:10:18,719 --> 00:10:21,822
What's the matter,
Pudding pop?
191
00:10:21,889 --> 00:10:25,025
Well, if you must know,
I'm a little worried
About my father.
192
00:10:25,092 --> 00:10:28,662
The big guy?
What's wrong?
193
00:10:28,729 --> 00:10:30,397
Well, my mom asked him
If he was going to take
194
00:10:30,463 --> 00:10:34,267
The test to become a lieutenant,
And he completely
Freaked out.
195
00:10:34,334 --> 00:10:36,704
Ahh.
196
00:10:36,770 --> 00:10:38,505
You know
Why he did that?
197
00:10:38,571 --> 00:10:40,107
No, but I want you
To continue,
198
00:10:40,173 --> 00:10:42,109
So I went, "Ahh."
199
00:10:45,112 --> 00:10:46,013
Oh.
200
00:10:46,079 --> 00:10:49,983
Well, is the big guy
Still freaked out?
201
00:10:50,050 --> 00:10:52,452
Let's just say
He's treating us
202
00:10:52,519 --> 00:10:56,023
The way he normally
Treats you.
203
00:10:56,089 --> 00:10:58,391
Ooh.
204
00:10:58,458 --> 00:11:01,394
I just wish there was
Something I could do
To help him.
205
00:11:01,461 --> 00:11:03,897
Uh, what your father
Needs
206
00:11:03,964 --> 00:11:05,098
Is a heart-to-heart
Chat
207
00:11:05,165 --> 00:11:07,901
With someone wise,
Caring, and sensitive.
208
00:11:08,836 --> 00:11:09,970
Yeah. You're right.
209
00:11:10,037 --> 00:11:11,604
But we don't know
Anybody like that,
210
00:11:11,671 --> 00:11:14,274
So I'll do it.
211
00:11:14,341 --> 00:11:16,977
Well, bye, sweetums.
212
00:11:21,715 --> 00:11:22,750
Ow!
213
00:11:22,816 --> 00:11:25,018
I think I broke my snort.
214
00:11:26,686 --> 00:11:27,888
[snorts]
215
00:11:38,799 --> 00:11:42,069
Hey, kid! You are
Late with my paper.
216
00:11:44,905 --> 00:11:47,975
[gasping]
217
00:11:55,949 --> 00:11:58,085
Heck of an arm on that kid.
218
00:12:22,976 --> 00:12:26,046
Top of the morning
To you, big guy.
219
00:12:26,113 --> 00:12:27,881
Steve, what are you
Doing here?
220
00:12:27,948 --> 00:12:31,251
Shaking my booty
In your kitchen.
221
00:12:31,318 --> 00:12:33,987
Flipping, frying,
Toasting, and poaching.
222
00:12:34,054 --> 00:12:35,789
What is that
Awful stench?
223
00:12:35,856 --> 00:12:38,491
Ooh, it's fresh flounder.
224
00:12:38,558 --> 00:12:39,993
I made it
Just for the halibut.
225
00:12:40,060 --> 00:12:41,929
[laughing and snorting]
226
00:12:42,863 --> 00:12:44,197
Fish for breakfast?
227
00:12:44,264 --> 00:12:48,435
Yes, indeedy.
It's brain food.
228
00:12:48,501 --> 00:12:50,637
Why would I need
Brain food?
229
00:12:50,703 --> 00:12:52,172
Because you're
Going to study
230
00:12:52,239 --> 00:12:53,640
For that
Lieutenant's test.
231
00:12:53,706 --> 00:12:54,674
Steve--
232
00:12:54,741 --> 00:12:56,509
Okay, okay, okay,
Okay, okay.
233
00:12:56,576 --> 00:12:59,679
Carl, I know why
You don't want
To take that test.
234
00:12:59,746 --> 00:13:01,681
Get out.
I'm right, carl.
235
00:13:01,748 --> 00:13:02,816
You don't want
To take that test
236
00:13:02,883 --> 00:13:05,785
Because you have...
Fof.
237
00:13:10,057 --> 00:13:10,723
Fof?
238
00:13:10,790 --> 00:13:13,093
Yes. Fof.
239
00:13:17,330 --> 00:13:18,798
What is fof?
240
00:13:18,866 --> 00:13:21,101
Fof is fear of failure.
241
00:13:21,168 --> 00:13:22,602
Even the most
Confident people
242
00:13:22,669 --> 00:13:25,272
Have moments
Of fofnocity.
243
00:13:27,240 --> 00:13:30,443
Are you calling me
A fofnaficator?
244
00:13:34,414 --> 00:13:35,548
Fefinately.
245
00:13:37,017 --> 00:13:39,987
Zap. When you're
Feeling nervous,
246
00:13:40,053 --> 00:13:41,922
When you're trapped
In that emotional pit
247
00:13:41,989 --> 00:13:44,057
Of doubt and despair,
Steve...
248
00:13:44,124 --> 00:13:46,593
That's when you dig deep
Into your character
249
00:13:46,659 --> 00:13:51,298
And peel away the layers
Of cowardice, self-doubt,
Anything,
250
00:13:51,364 --> 00:13:56,036
Until you get down
To the raw steel
Of yes-can-do,
251
00:13:56,103 --> 00:14:00,874
And then you
Hot-dip that steel
And fortify yourself.
252
00:14:00,941 --> 00:14:03,410
Steve--
Now, carl,
253
00:14:03,476 --> 00:14:04,544
[slurp]
254
00:14:04,611 --> 00:14:08,215
Suck up that flounder,
And let's hit the books.
255
00:14:08,281 --> 00:14:09,349
Steve...
256
00:14:10,717 --> 00:14:11,919
Go home!
257
00:14:11,985 --> 00:14:13,220
Carl, I'm just--
258
00:14:13,286 --> 00:14:14,721
Go home!
259
00:14:14,787 --> 00:14:15,956
I have muffins
In the oven.
260
00:14:16,023 --> 00:14:19,292
Go home, go home,
Go home!
261
00:14:19,359 --> 00:14:22,529
I don't have to
Take this.
I'm going home.
262
00:14:26,466 --> 00:14:27,767
Hi, steve.
263
00:14:27,834 --> 00:14:29,069
Hi, estelle.
264
00:14:29,136 --> 00:14:32,339
Your son here
Is having a little
Hissy fit.
265
00:14:32,405 --> 00:14:34,607
Maybe you can do
Something with him.
266
00:14:39,746 --> 00:14:41,581
What's the problem,
Carl?
267
00:14:41,648 --> 00:14:43,216
Oh, there's
No problem now.
268
00:14:43,283 --> 00:14:44,985
The problem
Just left.
269
00:14:45,052 --> 00:14:48,821
Are you still upset
About that lieutenant's
Exam?
270
00:14:48,888 --> 00:14:50,457
I don't believe this.
271
00:14:50,523 --> 00:14:52,792
How does everybody know
I'm not taking
That stupid test?
272
00:14:52,859 --> 00:14:54,194
Oh, calm down, carl.
273
00:14:54,261 --> 00:14:57,931
No, I will not
Calm down.
274
00:14:57,998 --> 00:14:59,699
Harriette called you,
Didn't she?
275
00:14:59,766 --> 00:15:01,634
Yes, she did.
276
00:15:01,701 --> 00:15:04,304
She doesn't understand
Why you're so angry
With her
277
00:15:04,371 --> 00:15:07,007
For bringing up
The lieutenant's
Exam.
278
00:15:07,074 --> 00:15:09,642
I'm not angry
At her, ma.
279
00:15:09,709 --> 00:15:11,344
Well, what's the problem,
Honey?
280
00:15:11,945 --> 00:15:13,981
I don't know.
281
00:15:14,047 --> 00:15:16,849
Steve says I have
This weird thing
Called "Fof."
282
00:15:16,916 --> 00:15:19,219
Oh, fear of failure.
283
00:15:24,924 --> 00:15:26,393
Well, yeah, but...
284
00:15:26,459 --> 00:15:27,260
[chuckles]
285
00:15:27,327 --> 00:15:29,362
That's ridiculous...
Isn't it?
286
00:15:29,429 --> 00:15:31,431
Is it?
287
00:15:31,498 --> 00:15:32,432
No.
288
00:15:32,499 --> 00:15:34,367
He's right.
289
00:15:34,434 --> 00:15:36,970
Mom, it's
A real tough test.
290
00:15:37,037 --> 00:15:39,406
A lot of
Very smart guys
Have failed it.
291
00:15:39,472 --> 00:15:41,308
Well, that only means
If you fail,
292
00:15:41,374 --> 00:15:43,676
You'll be
In good company.
293
00:15:44,577 --> 00:15:45,979
But, mom...
294
00:15:46,046 --> 00:15:48,148
Dad was a lieutenant.
295
00:15:48,215 --> 00:15:50,950
And even though
He's gone now,
296
00:15:51,018 --> 00:15:52,919
I still want him
To be proud of me.
297
00:15:52,986 --> 00:15:56,990
Carl, I knew your father
Better than anyone.
298
00:15:57,057 --> 00:16:01,928
He was proud of you
When you tried your best.
299
00:16:01,995 --> 00:16:03,596
Yeah, but...
300
00:16:04,864 --> 00:16:07,767
If I take the test
And fail,
301
00:16:07,834 --> 00:16:10,203
I'll feel like I'm
Letting him down.
302
00:16:10,270 --> 00:16:12,705
The only way you
Could let him down
303
00:16:12,772 --> 00:16:16,343
Is if you didn't
Try at all.
304
00:16:16,409 --> 00:16:18,878
Oh, mom,
You're so sweet.
305
00:16:18,945 --> 00:16:20,513
Bless you.
306
00:16:37,864 --> 00:16:40,300
Waldo, is that you?
Yeah!
307
00:16:40,367 --> 00:16:42,702
Come on in.
The door's open.
308
00:16:42,769 --> 00:16:44,604
You sure?
309
00:16:44,671 --> 00:16:46,306
Yeah.
310
00:16:46,806 --> 00:16:48,241
[thud]
311
00:16:48,308 --> 00:16:50,009
Ow!
312
00:16:50,843 --> 00:16:53,180
Hey, you
Tricked me bad.
313
00:16:54,347 --> 00:16:56,816
Look...Thanks
For coming over.
314
00:16:56,883 --> 00:17:00,220
I mean, considering
That we're not
Friends anymore.
315
00:17:00,287 --> 00:17:03,390
You're just lucky
Lost in space
Was a rerun.
316
00:17:07,727 --> 00:17:09,662
Do I smell
S'getti sauce?
317
00:17:09,729 --> 00:17:11,064
You sure do.
318
00:17:11,131 --> 00:17:13,233
Shall we pasta?
Cool.
319
00:17:17,637 --> 00:17:18,805
Oh!
320
00:17:18,871 --> 00:17:19,839
Criminal.
321
00:17:19,906 --> 00:17:20,840
May I?
322
00:17:20,907 --> 00:17:22,709
Kick it.
323
00:17:56,176 --> 00:17:57,410
Listen...
324
00:17:57,477 --> 00:18:00,213
Waldo, the reason
I asked you
To come over
325
00:18:00,280 --> 00:18:03,049
Is because there's
Something you got
To understand.
326
00:18:03,116 --> 00:18:04,351
Just because
I'm going to college
327
00:18:04,417 --> 00:18:06,886
Doesn't mean
We still can't be friends.
328
00:18:06,953 --> 00:18:08,121
Oh, yeah?
329
00:18:08,188 --> 00:18:10,890
My brother
Renaldo geraldo faldo--
330
00:18:10,957 --> 00:18:13,193
He had
The same girlfriend
All through high school,
331
00:18:13,260 --> 00:18:14,927
But they went
To different colleges.
332
00:18:14,994 --> 00:18:16,363
They swore
They'd stay in love,
333
00:18:16,429 --> 00:18:19,132
But she met
Another guy,
And they broke up.
334
00:18:19,199 --> 00:18:22,635
Waldo, that's not us.
335
00:18:22,702 --> 00:18:24,304
I know. Didn't I say
336
00:18:24,371 --> 00:18:26,606
It was my brother
And his girlfriend?
337
00:18:28,475 --> 00:18:31,778
And you call yourself
A college man.
338
00:18:31,844 --> 00:18:34,581
Look,
For the past two years,
All we've talked about
339
00:18:34,647 --> 00:18:37,484
Is getting an apartment
Together after
We graduate, right?
340
00:18:37,550 --> 00:18:39,586
Right, but now
That's not gonna happen.
341
00:18:39,652 --> 00:18:40,820
Why not?
342
00:18:40,887 --> 00:18:42,622
Cause you'll be
Living in some dorm
Or frat house.
343
00:18:42,689 --> 00:18:45,091
No way. I'm gonna
Be sharing an apartment
344
00:18:45,158 --> 00:18:48,761
With my best friend--
Waldo geraldo faldo.
345
00:18:48,828 --> 00:18:51,331
But you'll be
Getting up every day
To go to class,
346
00:18:51,398 --> 00:18:54,934
And I'll be getting up
To go...Where?
347
00:18:55,001 --> 00:18:56,169
Here.
348
00:19:00,273 --> 00:19:03,976
The chicago
Kill-a-canary institute?
349
00:19:04,043 --> 00:19:05,978
No. Culinary.
350
00:19:06,045 --> 00:19:08,114
The chicago culinary
Institute.
351
00:19:08,181 --> 00:19:09,716
The gourmet cooking school?
Yeah.
352
00:19:09,782 --> 00:19:12,084
Some of the top chefs in
The country have studied there.
353
00:19:12,151 --> 00:19:14,754
I know.
You ever thought about going?
354
00:19:14,821 --> 00:19:17,457
Are you kidding?
That would be
A dream come true.
355
00:19:17,524 --> 00:19:22,128
Okay. Then fill out that
Application and send it in.
356
00:19:22,195 --> 00:19:23,630
No way.
I'm not good enough.
357
00:19:23,696 --> 00:19:25,598
Yes, you are.
358
00:19:25,665 --> 00:19:29,402
I mean, sure, I grind
My own nut meats,
But...
359
00:19:29,469 --> 00:19:31,471
Waldo...
'sup?
360
00:19:33,139 --> 00:19:36,142
10 minutes ago,
This was ketchup.
361
00:19:36,209 --> 00:19:37,410
But now...
362
00:19:40,747 --> 00:19:42,549
Mmm.
363
00:19:42,615 --> 00:19:44,150
It's perfect.
364
00:19:44,217 --> 00:19:46,052
Waldo,
You got a gift.
365
00:19:46,118 --> 00:19:48,421
When it comes to food,
You're an artist.
366
00:19:52,859 --> 00:19:55,562
I don't want
To see you
Waste that gift.
367
00:19:55,628 --> 00:19:59,198
So fill out
That application
And send it in.
368
00:19:59,266 --> 00:20:01,501
You can make
Your dream come true,
Man.
369
00:20:09,476 --> 00:20:11,311
Thanks, eddie.
You're a good friend.
370
00:20:11,378 --> 00:20:12,579
Right back at you.
371
00:20:12,645 --> 00:20:14,146
I'll fill this out
Right now.
372
00:20:14,213 --> 00:20:16,215
Good idea.
373
00:20:19,352 --> 00:20:20,687
Let's see...
374
00:20:22,188 --> 00:20:23,022
"Name."
375
00:20:23,089 --> 00:20:24,424
Got one.
376
00:20:30,330 --> 00:20:31,998
"Address."
Got one of those, too.
377
00:20:34,834 --> 00:20:35,802
"Sex."
378
00:20:35,868 --> 00:20:38,871
Soon, I hope.
379
00:20:48,381 --> 00:20:49,949
Hi, honey.
380
00:20:50,016 --> 00:20:51,951
Hello, carl.
381
00:20:52,018 --> 00:20:53,353
What's wrong?
382
00:20:54,654 --> 00:20:57,424
Something came
In the mail, and,
383
00:20:57,490 --> 00:20:59,559
Well, it kind of
Got to me.
384
00:20:59,626 --> 00:21:01,761
Oh, harriette, I've told you
A hundred times,
385
00:21:01,828 --> 00:21:04,597
Don't let
Those lingerie catalogues
Get you down.
386
00:21:07,767 --> 00:21:10,703
Those girls
Are professional models.
They starve themselves.
387
00:21:10,770 --> 00:21:11,904
Carl...
388
00:21:13,906 --> 00:21:16,843
It wasn't
A lingerie
Catalogue.
389
00:21:16,909 --> 00:21:20,913
It was the results
Of your lieutenant's
Exam.
390
00:21:20,980 --> 00:21:22,749
Oh.
391
00:21:22,815 --> 00:21:25,885
Well, I guess
You don't have to
Tell me the outcome.
392
00:21:25,952 --> 00:21:26,619
Carl...
393
00:21:26,686 --> 00:21:30,022
Uhh. I'm okay.
It's okay.
394
00:21:30,089 --> 00:21:33,059
I'll just take the test
Again next year,
That's all.
395
00:21:37,330 --> 00:21:39,699
Come here.
Come on, harriette.
396
00:21:39,766 --> 00:21:42,001
You don't have to
Try to cheer me up.
397
00:21:42,068 --> 00:21:43,403
I'm not.
398
00:21:43,470 --> 00:21:45,805
It's just that
I've always wanted
399
00:21:45,872 --> 00:21:48,675
To kiss a lieutenant.
400
00:21:48,741 --> 00:21:49,709
What?
401
00:21:49,776 --> 00:21:50,943
You mean--
402
00:21:51,010 --> 00:21:53,513
I did it!
I did it!
403
00:22:05,492 --> 00:22:06,726
Here you go, ma'am.
404
00:22:06,793 --> 00:22:07,694
Thank you.
405
00:22:07,760 --> 00:22:11,598
And, uh...Here's
Your change, baby.
406
00:22:11,664 --> 00:22:13,366
You know, I'm curious.
407
00:22:13,433 --> 00:22:15,301
I can't help but wonder.
408
00:22:15,368 --> 00:22:18,337
Why are you
Smiling at me?
409
00:22:18,405 --> 00:22:21,941
I'm trying not to laugh
At that stupid hat.
410
00:22:35,722 --> 00:22:37,323
Goodnight,
Mrs. Ostendorf.
411
00:22:37,390 --> 00:22:40,460
Young man,
My hot dog was overcooked,
412
00:22:40,527 --> 00:22:42,495
My fries were greasy,
413
00:22:42,562 --> 00:22:45,131
And my soda
Was watered down.
414
00:22:45,197 --> 00:22:46,866
See you tomorrow?
415
00:22:46,933 --> 00:22:48,601
You betcha.
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