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♪ Come and knock on our door ♪
2
00:00:13,914 --> 00:00:15,558
♪ Come and knock on our door ♪
3
00:00:15,582 --> 00:00:17,082
♪ We've been waitin' for you ♪
4
00:00:17,151 --> 00:00:18,695
♪ We've been waitin' for you ♪
5
00:00:18,719 --> 00:00:21,820
♪ Where the kisses are
hers and hers and his ♪
6
00:00:21,889 --> 00:00:24,656
♪ Three's company too ♪
7
00:00:24,725 --> 00:00:28,037
♪ Come and dance on our floor ♪
♪ Come and dance on our floor ♪
8
00:00:28,061 --> 00:00:31,196
♪ Take a step that is new ♪
♪ Take a step that is new ♪
9
00:00:31,265 --> 00:00:34,266
♪ We've a loveable space
that needs your face ♪
10
00:00:34,335 --> 00:00:37,236
♪ Three's company too ♪
11
00:00:37,304 --> 00:00:40,005
♪ You'll see that
life is a ball again ♪
12
00:00:40,074 --> 00:00:43,408
♪ Laughter is calling for you ♪
13
00:00:43,477 --> 00:00:46,611
♪ Down at our rendezvous ♪
♪ Down at our rendezvous ♪
14
00:00:46,680 --> 00:00:48,881
♪ Three's company too ♪
15
00:00:55,956 --> 00:00:58,990
♪ Down at our rendezvous ♪
♪ Down at our rendezvous ♪
16
00:00:59,059 --> 00:01:01,059
♪ Three's company too ♪
17
00:01:03,764 --> 00:01:05,363
Jack?
18
00:01:05,432 --> 00:01:07,510
Jack, how long are you
gonna stay in the bathroom?
19
00:01:07,534 --> 00:01:10,202
Until I'm finished.
20
00:01:10,270 --> 00:01:12,281
Will you let me
in? I have a date!
21
00:01:12,305 --> 00:01:13,305
In here?
22
00:01:15,575 --> 00:01:16,708
Jack!
23
00:01:16,777 --> 00:01:18,110
Well, I have a date, too.
24
00:01:18,178 --> 00:01:20,478
And I'm not coming
out until I'm beautiful.
25
00:01:27,587 --> 00:01:30,789
Oh, Jack! Your
souffle is burning!
26
00:01:30,858 --> 00:01:31,858
Oh, my souffl...
27
00:01:34,161 --> 00:01:35,939
Hey, I'm not cooking anything.
28
00:01:35,963 --> 00:01:38,663
My mistake.
29
00:01:38,732 --> 00:01:39,664
Come here.
30
00:01:39,733 --> 00:01:40,910
Just for a second. Janet!
31
00:01:40,934 --> 00:01:41,866
Janet.
32
00:01:41,935 --> 00:01:43,001
Open the door.
33
00:01:43,069 --> 00:01:44,002
That's better.
34
00:01:44,070 --> 00:01:45,649
You forgot your pants. Janet...
35
00:01:47,274 --> 00:01:49,352
Couldn't you wait till I
was through changing?
36
00:01:49,376 --> 00:01:51,743
Jack, would you please
just answer the door?
37
00:01:55,082 --> 00:01:56,114
Hi.
38
00:01:56,183 --> 00:01:58,195
Oh, excuse me.
I'm Hank Thompson.
39
00:01:58,219 --> 00:01:59,951
I'm looking for Janet.
40
00:02:00,020 --> 00:02:03,355
She's still getting dressed,
Hank. You're a little early.
41
00:02:06,360 --> 00:02:07,704
Hope I haven't
interrupted anything.
42
00:02:07,728 --> 00:02:10,729
No, no. Come on in. Thanks.
43
00:02:10,797 --> 00:02:13,198
Say, uh... Who are you?
44
00:02:13,267 --> 00:02:14,899
Oh, I'm sorry. I'm Jack Tripper.
45
00:02:14,968 --> 00:02:16,602
I live here with
Janet and Terri.
46
00:02:16,670 --> 00:02:18,269
Oh. How nice.
47
00:02:18,339 --> 00:02:21,406
Not really. Sometimes,
they can be a real headache.
48
00:02:21,475 --> 00:02:23,374
Jack, could you zip me?
49
00:02:23,444 --> 00:02:24,754
See what I mean? Ahh...
50
00:02:24,778 --> 00:02:27,090
Terri? This is
Hank Thompson. Hi.
51
00:02:27,114 --> 00:02:28,479
Oh, how nice to meet... you!
52
00:02:28,548 --> 00:02:30,493
Will you stand still?
Your hands are cold.
53
00:02:30,517 --> 00:02:32,277
Well, they're getting warmer.
54
00:02:33,787 --> 00:02:35,787
Zip. Zipping.
55
00:02:38,459 --> 00:02:41,304
Hi, Hank. Sorry to keep you
waiting. Oh, it was worth it.
56
00:02:41,328 --> 00:02:42,860
Ooo, wow. Do you look gorgeous!
57
00:02:42,929 --> 00:02:44,129
Really? Hey...
58
00:02:44,198 --> 00:02:45,863
Are those prescription glasses?
59
00:02:47,634 --> 00:02:49,179
Hank, have you met Jack?
60
00:02:49,203 --> 00:02:52,115
Yeah. Too bad. Shall we go?
61
00:02:52,139 --> 00:02:54,317
Bye. Oh, oh, oh. Terri.
62
00:02:54,341 --> 00:02:57,008
You're $15 short on
your share of the rent.
63
00:02:57,077 --> 00:02:58,977
I am not. I paid the phone bill.
64
00:02:59,046 --> 00:03:00,523
Excuse me. Excuse me.
65
00:03:00,547 --> 00:03:02,414
I paid the phone bill.
66
00:03:02,483 --> 00:03:04,883
Oh. Well, didn't I
pay for the cleaning?
67
00:03:04,951 --> 00:03:06,551
Yep. With my $10.
68
00:03:06,620 --> 00:03:09,187
Well, didn't I buy the
groceries this week?
69
00:03:09,256 --> 00:03:10,433
Nope.
70
00:03:10,457 --> 00:03:12,924
You're right. I owe you $15.
71
00:03:12,993 --> 00:03:14,504
Excuse me. Do you usually have
72
00:03:14,528 --> 00:03:16,672
this much trouble with
household finances?
73
00:03:16,696 --> 00:03:19,030
Nah. Only months we
have to pay the rent.
74
00:03:19,099 --> 00:03:20,776
What do you do to get by?
75
00:03:20,800 --> 00:03:23,568
Gee, Hank, I'd love to
sit and talk about this,
76
00:03:23,637 --> 00:03:25,570
but I have a date. Excuse me.
77
00:03:25,639 --> 00:03:28,339
I think my readers
would be interested.
78
00:03:28,408 --> 00:03:29,808
Readers?
79
00:03:29,876 --> 00:03:32,255
Yeah. Hank does a column
on coping with inflation.
80
00:03:32,279 --> 00:03:34,212
And I'd love to write
about you three.
81
00:03:34,281 --> 00:03:35,692
- If you don't mind.
- Well...
82
00:03:35,716 --> 00:03:37,749
No, no. I don't
mind. Not at all.
83
00:03:37,817 --> 00:03:39,329
Come on over here, Hank.
84
00:03:39,353 --> 00:03:41,397
Sit on down. Make
yourself comfortable.
85
00:03:41,421 --> 00:03:42,888
Hey!
86
00:03:42,956 --> 00:03:45,237
Cheap thrill, Terri.
87
00:03:46,826 --> 00:03:50,206
You know, Hank, it all
started six years ago.
88
00:03:50,230 --> 00:03:52,342
Feel free to quote me.
89
00:03:52,366 --> 00:03:54,332
Jack! That's J-A-C-K.
90
00:03:54,401 --> 00:03:57,213
See, I was a struggling
young cooking student
91
00:03:57,237 --> 00:03:58,704
who had a dream.
92
00:03:58,772 --> 00:04:02,107
I think it would really be better
if I just asked you all questions.
93
00:04:02,176 --> 00:04:04,420
Yes. It certainly would.
94
00:04:04,444 --> 00:04:05,376
Now...
95
00:04:05,445 --> 00:04:07,979
First of all: what
made the three of you
96
00:04:08,048 --> 00:04:10,148
decide to live together, huh?
97
00:04:10,217 --> 00:04:12,450
Economics. It's a lot cheaper.
98
00:04:12,519 --> 00:04:14,163
Yeah. We save a
lot on entertainment.
99
00:04:14,187 --> 00:04:16,267
We never have to
leave to have fun.
100
00:04:20,994 --> 00:04:22,493
As I was saying,
101
00:04:22,562 --> 00:04:24,640
it's cheaper when three
people share the rent,
102
00:04:24,664 --> 00:04:26,076
the food, the utilities...
103
00:04:26,100 --> 00:04:27,710
Do you share everything?
104
00:04:27,734 --> 00:04:29,879
Well... Everything.
105
00:04:29,903 --> 00:04:32,370
Aiee!
106
00:04:32,439 --> 00:04:34,284
He's not interested
in your fantasies.
107
00:04:34,308 --> 00:04:35,952
He's interested
in the apartment.
108
00:04:35,976 --> 00:04:38,688
See, I wanted a place
close to the hospital
109
00:04:38,712 --> 00:04:40,824
where I work as a nurse. Mm-hmm.
110
00:04:40,848 --> 00:04:44,248
Hank? It isn't
easy being a nurse.
111
00:04:44,317 --> 00:04:47,363
I'm under a great deal
of stress and strain.
112
00:04:47,387 --> 00:04:48,667
Terri!
113
00:04:50,657 --> 00:04:53,524
That's Terri with an "I".
114
00:04:53,593 --> 00:04:56,706
Would you two mind if we
just stuck to the subject?
115
00:04:56,730 --> 00:05:00,865
Jeez. You see, Hank, I was
living here, in this apartment
116
00:05:00,934 --> 00:05:03,412
with two girls. Then
Eleanor got pregnant,
117
00:05:03,436 --> 00:05:05,648
and we got Jack.
Well, not exactly...
118
00:05:05,672 --> 00:05:07,583
I mean, she didn't
have Jack... Hey, hey...
119
00:05:07,607 --> 00:05:11,142
Excuse me. What happened was they
begged me on hands and knees to move in.
120
00:05:11,211 --> 00:05:12,811
I decided to give 'em a break.
121
00:05:12,879 --> 00:05:15,091
Jack! That's not the
way it happened at all.
122
00:05:15,115 --> 00:05:16,725
Of all the egotistical things...
123
00:05:16,749 --> 00:05:17,749
Wait, wait, wait...
124
00:05:17,817 --> 00:05:19,895
Hold on a second! Wait!
125
00:05:19,919 --> 00:05:23,099
Hank wants to say
something. He's our guest.
126
00:05:23,123 --> 00:05:24,734
Please. Feel free,
Hank. Go ahead.
127
00:05:24,758 --> 00:05:27,959
Let's just stick to
the basic problems.
128
00:05:28,028 --> 00:05:30,140
All right? And one
at a time. Please.
129
00:05:30,164 --> 00:05:32,096
Okay. Go. Right.
130
00:05:32,166 --> 00:05:34,966
It's not easy being one
of the top chefs in L.A.
131
00:05:35,035 --> 00:05:36,879
That's Tripper. T-R-I-Jack...
132
00:05:36,903 --> 00:05:40,272
He said one at a time,
Janet. Double P-E-R.
133
00:05:44,845 --> 00:05:46,723
Well, I'm pretty
excited about it.
134
00:05:46,747 --> 00:05:48,113
Hey, girls. Paper come yet?
135
00:05:48,181 --> 00:05:49,492
No, not yet. Jack,
136
00:05:49,516 --> 00:05:51,928
why don't you look? That
kid never hits the landing.
137
00:05:51,952 --> 00:05:52,952
Yeah, okay.
138
00:06:01,862 --> 00:06:06,464
Lucky shot, Arnold!
I hate that kid.
139
00:06:06,533 --> 00:06:07,465
Did'ja get it? Yeah.
140
00:06:07,534 --> 00:06:08,745
It came airmail. Good.
141
00:06:08,769 --> 00:06:09,979
I can't wait to read it. Here.
142
00:06:10,003 --> 00:06:12,203
You girls take some
sections, here. All right?
143
00:06:12,272 --> 00:06:13,449
Let's look. Try that one.
144
00:06:13,473 --> 00:06:15,006
You sure it's in today's paper?
145
00:06:15,075 --> 00:06:17,441
I don't know, Jack.
That's what Hank said.
146
00:06:19,412 --> 00:06:20,912
Oh, no.
147
00:06:20,981 --> 00:06:21,981
What?
148
00:06:22,048 --> 00:06:24,148
Burt Reynolds broke up again.
149
00:06:27,087 --> 00:06:30,622
Oh, here it is. Hank
Thompson. Read it, read it.
150
00:06:30,691 --> 00:06:32,991
"Penny Pinching Can Be Fun."
151
00:06:33,060 --> 00:06:37,328
Let's see. "One run-down
apartment, two knockout girls
152
00:06:37,397 --> 00:06:39,430
"and an All-American boy
153
00:06:39,499 --> 00:06:42,600
equals one-third the rent
and three times the fun."
154
00:06:42,669 --> 00:06:44,970
Wow. He called us knockouts.
155
00:06:45,038 --> 00:06:47,906
You can't believe anything you
read in the papers these days.
156
00:06:50,844 --> 00:06:53,645
Terri, a nurse who'd
quicken any patient's pulse,
157
00:06:53,714 --> 00:06:58,115
assures me that nothing happens at
home to make Jack's temperature rise.
158
00:06:58,184 --> 00:07:00,318
But you can't tell
me this young chef
159
00:07:00,387 --> 00:07:03,299
doesn't do more than his share
of cooking in that apartment.
160
00:07:03,323 --> 00:07:05,590
Hey! What is this?
161
00:07:05,659 --> 00:07:07,725
That's not true. It gets better.
162
00:07:07,794 --> 00:07:10,762
And then there's Janet,
who works in a flower shop.
163
00:07:10,830 --> 00:07:13,898
Now this honey really
keeps Jack buzzin' around.
164
00:07:13,967 --> 00:07:17,269
Why, that crumb.
165
00:07:17,337 --> 00:07:20,939
With these three, it's share
and share and share alike.
166
00:07:21,007 --> 00:07:24,409
And from the look on Jack's
face, they do share everything.
167
00:07:26,780 --> 00:07:28,646
Well, that makes
it sound like we're...
168
00:07:28,715 --> 00:07:30,715
Yeah. That'd be
wonderful, wouldn't it?
169
00:07:33,253 --> 00:07:35,198
Jack... You know I'm kidding.
170
00:07:35,222 --> 00:07:37,422
How could he
write that about us?
171
00:07:37,490 --> 00:07:40,003
I thought he was your
friend. Not anymore.
172
00:07:40,027 --> 00:07:42,171
What are people gonna
think when they read this?
173
00:07:42,195 --> 00:07:43,439
Nothing. What?
174
00:07:43,463 --> 00:07:45,596
Come on. The story's
buried on the back page.
175
00:07:45,665 --> 00:07:48,499
I mean, whose life could
possibly be so boring
176
00:07:48,568 --> 00:07:50,668
that they'd read the
paper from cover to cover?
177
00:07:50,737 --> 00:07:53,315
Open up! It's Ralph Furley!
178
00:07:53,339 --> 00:07:59,077
There's your answer.
Boy. If he read this article,
179
00:07:59,146 --> 00:08:01,057
I'd better start looking
for a new place.
180
00:08:01,081 --> 00:08:02,447
Hide it, Jack. Hide it.
181
00:08:02,516 --> 00:08:06,284
Hello. I just finished reading
Hank Thompson's column.
182
00:08:06,353 --> 00:08:09,220
Oh, boy. I better start packing.
183
00:08:09,289 --> 00:08:10,289
Freeze.
184
00:08:10,357 --> 00:08:12,769
Oh, Mr. Furley. We can explain.
185
00:08:12,793 --> 00:08:14,926
It's a little late for that.
186
00:08:14,994 --> 00:08:17,573
It's all right here, for
the whole world to see.
187
00:08:17,597 --> 00:08:19,942
But Mr. Furley? It isn't true.
188
00:08:19,966 --> 00:08:21,644
You bet it isn't! What?
189
00:08:21,668 --> 00:08:24,068
"One run-down apartment."
190
00:08:27,607 --> 00:08:29,152
This apartment isn't run down.
191
00:08:29,176 --> 00:08:31,254
I just painted it
three years ago.
192
00:08:31,278 --> 00:08:33,478
Oh, thank God.
193
00:08:33,547 --> 00:08:35,724
And then when I read
what was going on
194
00:08:35,748 --> 00:08:37,426
between you and the girls.
195
00:08:37,450 --> 00:08:39,083
Hmm!
196
00:08:39,152 --> 00:08:41,592
Talk about your fairy tales!
197
00:08:45,892 --> 00:08:48,337
Hope this doesn't hurt
your social life, Jack!
198
00:08:48,361 --> 00:08:52,530
What a relief! Am I
glad that's over. Whoo!
199
00:08:52,598 --> 00:08:54,376
What do you mean, over? Yeah.
200
00:08:54,400 --> 00:08:56,745
How're we gonna go to
work and face people?
201
00:08:56,769 --> 00:08:58,303
Oh, come on. Don't worry.
202
00:08:58,371 --> 00:09:00,972
That article never mentioned
anybody's last name.
203
00:09:01,041 --> 00:09:03,574
Know how many flower
shops there are in Los Angeles?
204
00:09:03,643 --> 00:09:06,044
And Janet is a very common name.
205
00:09:06,112 --> 00:09:08,291
What? You know, he's right.
206
00:09:08,315 --> 00:09:11,149
There must be
thousands of nurses in L.A.
207
00:09:11,218 --> 00:09:13,229
And some of them
must be named Terri.
208
00:09:13,253 --> 00:09:14,693
I know, because I am.
209
00:09:14,754 --> 00:09:19,123
And you have been
for years, haven't you?
210
00:09:19,192 --> 00:09:21,092
Look, girls. Just take my advice
211
00:09:21,160 --> 00:09:22,960
and forget about
that story. Hey.
212
00:09:23,029 --> 00:09:25,363
After work, let's meet at
the Regal Beagle. I'll buy.
213
00:09:25,432 --> 00:09:29,167
Okay, Jack. Thanks.
I feel better. Me, too.
214
00:09:29,235 --> 00:09:32,369
Believe me. You girls
have nothing to worry about.
215
00:09:32,438 --> 00:09:33,972
Absolutely nothing.
216
00:09:34,041 --> 00:09:36,619
You're right. Yeah.
We just don't worry...
217
00:09:36,643 --> 00:09:39,944
Okay. That's 4.50 out of 5.
218
00:09:40,013 --> 00:09:41,357
So there's your
change, Mr. Hubbard.
219
00:09:41,381 --> 00:09:42,858
Thank you, Janet.
You're welcome.
220
00:09:42,882 --> 00:09:45,650
Oh, oh. I saved you
a pamphlet on ferns.
221
00:09:45,719 --> 00:09:46,963
I thought you'd be interested.
222
00:09:46,987 --> 00:09:48,553
Thank you.
223
00:09:48,621 --> 00:09:51,723
Of course, it won't be as
interesting as what I read about you.
224
00:09:51,791 --> 00:09:55,126
Oh, Mr. Hubbard. You didn't
believe that article, did you?
225
00:09:55,195 --> 00:09:57,728
Of course not.
226
00:09:57,797 --> 00:10:00,999
It was very kind of you to
save the pamphlet for me.
227
00:10:01,067 --> 00:10:02,411
I'll find it for you.
228
00:10:02,435 --> 00:10:04,955
I like to keep my
customers happy.
229
00:10:05,338 --> 00:10:07,272
I'll bet you do.
230
00:10:13,880 --> 00:10:14,813
Hi, Terri.
231
00:10:14,881 --> 00:10:16,514
Terri! Terri.
232
00:10:16,583 --> 00:10:20,919
I can't seem to find those
admittance papers for Mr. Chambers.
233
00:10:20,988 --> 00:10:22,621
Oh, here, Doctor.
Let me help you.
234
00:10:22,689 --> 00:10:24,667
Oh, thank you. Alrighty.
Would you excuse me, please?
235
00:10:24,691 --> 00:10:26,291
Oh. Sorry. Thank you.
236
00:10:26,326 --> 00:10:29,961
Let me see.
237
00:10:30,030 --> 00:10:31,896
Would you look at this.
238
00:10:31,965 --> 00:10:34,365
Everything back
here is such a mess.
239
00:10:34,434 --> 00:10:37,568
Not from where I'm standing.
240
00:10:37,638 --> 00:10:39,048
Here it is. Let's go.
241
00:10:39,072 --> 00:10:41,239
I'm right behind you.
242
00:10:45,478 --> 00:10:50,214
Talk about your lucky guys.
243
00:10:50,283 --> 00:10:52,684
That is just so terrible.
244
00:10:52,752 --> 00:10:54,652
I cannot believe it
happened to you, too.
245
00:10:54,721 --> 00:10:57,400
Well, he did. He just
reached over and pinched me.
246
00:10:57,424 --> 00:10:59,691
Where? Behind the door!
247
00:11:03,630 --> 00:11:04,630
Oh, no. Terri. Terri.
248
00:11:08,568 --> 00:11:11,047
Ooo. I never expected this.
249
00:11:11,071 --> 00:11:12,002
Me, neither.
250
00:11:12,072 --> 00:11:14,192
I never thought
those guys could read.
251
00:11:16,876 --> 00:11:17,808
Hey, Mike?
252
00:11:17,877 --> 00:11:19,477
Three beers, okay?
253
00:11:24,017 --> 00:11:26,778
Well, happy hour must
have started early today.
254
00:11:28,121 --> 00:11:29,954
Except at this table.
255
00:11:31,924 --> 00:11:34,103
What's the matter with
you? It's that dumb article.
256
00:11:34,127 --> 00:11:36,961
Janet and I both
got hit on today.
257
00:11:37,030 --> 00:11:38,440
What? Uh-huh.
258
00:11:38,464 --> 00:11:41,132
And now those creeps at
the bar are givin' us looks.
259
00:11:41,200 --> 00:11:43,513
I'll take care of those
guys. Hey, Jack.
260
00:11:43,537 --> 00:11:46,103
Boy, did I have
you pegged wrong.
261
00:11:46,172 --> 00:11:48,784
You did? Yeah. Hey, I
gotta hand it to you, guy.
262
00:11:48,808 --> 00:11:50,753
You're a better
man than I thought.
263
00:11:50,777 --> 00:11:52,643
Well, I get by
with a little help
264
00:11:52,713 --> 00:11:55,246
from my friends. Woo!
265
00:11:58,318 --> 00:12:00,751
What?
266
00:12:00,821 --> 00:12:03,521
Don't you even care what
happened to us today?
267
00:12:03,589 --> 00:12:04,866
Oh, of course I do.
268
00:12:04,890 --> 00:12:06,924
What happened to you was...
269
00:12:06,993 --> 00:12:11,229
Well, when you got it,
you got it. You know?
270
00:12:13,566 --> 00:12:15,344
No, what happened
to you was terrible.
271
00:12:15,368 --> 00:12:17,101
I mean, it was degrading,
272
00:12:17,170 --> 00:12:20,271
dehumanizing... Here we go!
273
00:12:20,339 --> 00:12:21,650
Three beers, on the house!
274
00:12:21,674 --> 00:12:23,318
Woo! Woo!
275
00:12:23,342 --> 00:12:25,542
No, they're not.
276
00:12:25,611 --> 00:12:27,811
They're on Jack.
277
00:12:45,364 --> 00:12:47,098
Good morning, girls.
278
00:12:47,167 --> 00:12:50,702
No, no, no. Come on, now.
You don't have to apologize.
279
00:12:50,770 --> 00:12:52,436
That beer was great for my hair.
280
00:12:52,506 --> 00:12:55,974
It left it soft and silky.
281
00:12:56,042 --> 00:12:59,443
Terri, could I have some of
your magical coffee, please?
282
00:12:59,512 --> 00:13:03,747
Thank you. In the cup,
not in the hair, okay?
283
00:13:03,817 --> 00:13:07,652
Oh, come on. You girls aren't
still mad about last night, are you?
284
00:13:07,721 --> 00:13:11,655
Mad? Who's mad?
285
00:13:11,725 --> 00:13:14,058
I'm glad you're not.
286
00:13:14,127 --> 00:13:18,629
None for me. Thanks.
287
00:13:18,698 --> 00:13:20,242
How could you
let those guys think
288
00:13:20,266 --> 00:13:22,044
there was something
going on between us?
289
00:13:22,068 --> 00:13:24,368
Come on, Janet.
It's not their fault.
290
00:13:24,437 --> 00:13:27,438
I mean, they see a
handsome, likeable
291
00:13:27,507 --> 00:13:28,740
fun-lovin' kind of guy,
292
00:13:28,808 --> 00:13:30,185
living with two lonely girls.
293
00:13:30,209 --> 00:13:32,476
Lonely?
294
00:13:32,545 --> 00:13:33,878
What does it hurt
295
00:13:33,946 --> 00:13:36,959
to let them have their silly
little fantasies? Why, Jack
296
00:13:36,983 --> 00:13:39,884
Tripper. Of all the
arrogant... Girls.
297
00:13:39,953 --> 00:13:42,419
- You're overreacting.
- Overreacting?
298
00:13:42,489 --> 00:13:45,990
Listen. As long as we know the truth,
who cares what other people think?
299
00:13:48,194 --> 00:13:49,494
Susan, what's the matter?
300
00:13:49,562 --> 00:13:53,798
You can take this stuffed
animal you gave me and stuff it.
301
00:13:53,867 --> 00:13:56,534
I don't suppose this
has anything to do
302
00:13:56,603 --> 00:13:58,469
with that article in
the paper about me.
303
00:13:58,538 --> 00:14:00,704
You two-timing fink!
304
00:14:00,773 --> 00:14:02,940
Yeah, that's the one.
305
00:14:03,009 --> 00:14:06,410
It's all lies. Girls, tell her.
306
00:14:06,479 --> 00:14:10,181
Anything you say, sexy.
307
00:14:10,250 --> 00:14:12,150
It's all lies.
308
00:14:12,218 --> 00:14:13,417
Every bit of it.
309
00:14:13,486 --> 00:14:14,418
Stop that!
310
00:14:14,487 --> 00:14:16,520
Would you stop that?
311
00:14:16,590 --> 00:14:19,223
Okay. It's all true.
312
00:14:19,292 --> 00:14:20,758
Every bit of it.
313
00:14:20,827 --> 00:14:23,160
Don't believe 'em.
Don't, don't believe...
314
00:14:23,230 --> 00:14:24,840
How could she help herself?
315
00:14:24,864 --> 00:14:26,130
I mean, here we are.
316
00:14:26,199 --> 00:14:28,165
These two lonely girls.
317
00:14:28,235 --> 00:14:30,501
Living with this
likeable, handsome...
318
00:14:30,570 --> 00:14:33,382
fun-loving kind of guy.
319
00:14:33,406 --> 00:14:36,373
You don't need this.
320
00:14:36,442 --> 00:14:38,120
You have enough
playthings of your own!
321
00:14:38,144 --> 00:14:39,376
Susan. Wait.
322
00:14:39,445 --> 00:14:43,214
Does this mean our date
for the carnival is off? Susan?
323
00:14:43,283 --> 00:14:47,552
There goes the best bumper-car
partner who ever lived!
324
00:14:50,690 --> 00:14:52,256
Why didn't you tell the truth?
325
00:14:52,325 --> 00:14:53,657
Oh, Jack.
326
00:14:53,726 --> 00:14:56,646
What does it matter if
she has her silly fantasies?
327
00:14:56,696 --> 00:14:58,740
Yes, Jack. You're
just overreacting.
328
00:14:58,764 --> 00:15:00,475
As long as we know the truth...
329
00:15:00,499 --> 00:15:01,598
Okay, okay. I was wrong.
330
00:15:01,667 --> 00:15:03,178
He finally admits it. Yeah.
331
00:15:03,202 --> 00:15:06,771
Boy, I never realized how quick
people are to believe the worst.
332
00:15:06,839 --> 00:15:08,450
What now?
333
00:15:08,474 --> 00:15:10,808
Oh, probably somebody else
coming here to smirk at us.
334
00:15:10,877 --> 00:15:13,644
I'll handle this. Okay.
335
00:15:13,713 --> 00:15:15,646
Go away! Take your
dirty mind with you!
336
00:15:15,715 --> 00:15:18,282
Who was that? My mother.
337
00:15:18,350 --> 00:15:19,350
My mother!
338
00:15:21,922 --> 00:15:24,522
Mom, I'm sorry. I
didn't recognize you.
339
00:15:24,590 --> 00:15:27,725
If you came to visit
more often, you might.
340
00:15:27,794 --> 00:15:30,595
You look terrific. You
remember my two roommates?
341
00:15:30,664 --> 00:15:33,104
Of course. Sodom and Gomorrah.
342
00:15:35,835 --> 00:15:38,670
I think she read the article.
343
00:15:38,738 --> 00:15:41,016
No wonder you don't
have time to write home.
344
00:15:41,040 --> 00:15:42,751
Listen, Mom. You
don't... Never mind.
345
00:15:42,775 --> 00:15:45,087
Tell me on the way
back to San Diego.
346
00:15:45,111 --> 00:15:46,488
Now go get packed. What?
347
00:15:46,512 --> 00:15:48,424
Do you have a nice suitcase?
348
00:15:48,448 --> 00:15:52,883
I hope you're not still using that
bag from the Navy. It smelled of fish.
349
00:15:52,953 --> 00:15:55,786
Mom, I'm not moving to
San Diego. I have a life here.
350
00:15:55,855 --> 00:15:58,289
I know. I read about it.
351
00:15:58,358 --> 00:16:01,959
Mom, that's all lies. Janet
and Terri are not like that at all.
352
00:16:02,028 --> 00:16:03,506
Aren't you a gentleman.
353
00:16:03,530 --> 00:16:06,296
Trying to protect
their reputation.
354
00:16:06,365 --> 00:16:09,500
Mrs. Tripper, can we
talk to you? Tell them no.
355
00:16:09,569 --> 00:16:11,747
No. Mom, listen... Go
to your room and pack.
356
00:16:11,771 --> 00:16:13,871
I'll help you. Hey, Mom. Look...
357
00:16:13,939 --> 00:16:17,708
Oh my gosh.
358
00:16:17,777 --> 00:16:18,787
Mrs. Alden!
359
00:16:18,811 --> 00:16:20,578
Come in. Mom!
360
00:16:20,647 --> 00:16:23,180
Terri. I can explain
361
00:16:23,249 --> 00:16:26,595
about that story, Mom. This is
not a wild and swinging apartment.
362
00:16:26,619 --> 00:16:28,530
There isn't anything going
on between me and Jack,
363
00:16:28,554 --> 00:16:30,266
or Janet and Jack,
or Jack or anything.
364
00:16:30,290 --> 00:16:31,855
What story?
365
00:16:31,925 --> 00:16:34,203
What do you mean, what story?
366
00:16:34,227 --> 00:16:36,071
You mean you didn't
read that the... oh.
367
00:16:36,095 --> 00:16:38,963
So... how are things at home?
368
00:16:39,032 --> 00:16:42,867
Will you please explain
what's going on here?
369
00:16:42,935 --> 00:16:44,535
I'll be happy to explain.
370
00:16:44,604 --> 00:16:46,003
According to the newspaper,
371
00:16:46,072 --> 00:16:48,951
these two have been
throwing themselves at my son.
372
00:16:48,975 --> 00:16:50,119
I'm Jack's mother.
373
00:16:50,143 --> 00:16:51,476
Well, that can't be true.
374
00:16:51,544 --> 00:16:53,522
Of course it can!
I'm Mrs. Tripper!
375
00:16:53,546 --> 00:16:56,847
The story in the
paper must be false.
376
00:16:56,916 --> 00:17:00,017
If there's any hanky-panky
going on around here,
377
00:17:00,086 --> 00:17:02,152
it's because of your son.
378
00:17:02,221 --> 00:17:05,289
Mom, there isn't
any... Hanky-panky?
379
00:17:05,358 --> 00:17:08,492
I knew I should never have
let you move in here with-with...
380
00:17:08,561 --> 00:17:09,993
Jack. Mother.
381
00:17:10,063 --> 00:17:12,441
Just listen to me one
itsy-bitsy little moment...
382
00:17:12,465 --> 00:17:15,832
Well, honestly. You never
would have spoken to me that way
383
00:17:15,901 --> 00:17:17,535
before you moved
in with-with-with...
384
00:17:17,603 --> 00:17:19,670
Still Jack.
385
00:17:19,739 --> 00:17:24,174
My Terri was always
such a sweet, innocent girl
386
00:17:24,244 --> 00:17:25,710
when she lived at home.
387
00:17:25,779 --> 00:17:28,657
Mrs. Alden, she's still
the same sweet girl.
388
00:17:28,681 --> 00:17:31,582
What happened to innocent?
389
00:17:31,651 --> 00:17:36,320
Oh, I warned you against
these big-city men. They're all
390
00:17:36,389 --> 00:17:38,356
sex maniacs!
391
00:17:38,425 --> 00:17:41,770
And I warned you about the
big-city women. They're all hussies.
392
00:17:41,794 --> 00:17:43,739
Well, I never. Well,
maybe you should have.
393
00:17:43,763 --> 00:17:46,263
Well, maybe I will.
394
00:17:46,332 --> 00:17:47,264
Ladies.
395
00:17:47,333 --> 00:17:49,044
Just a second.
396
00:17:49,068 --> 00:17:50,979
If you don't mind,
I'd like to speak
397
00:17:51,003 --> 00:17:53,649
to the sex maniac and
the hussy in the kitchen.
398
00:17:53,673 --> 00:17:55,517
Mom, would you
excuse me, please?
399
00:17:55,541 --> 00:17:57,381
Mother, may I? Get in here!
400
00:18:00,780 --> 00:18:03,759
I don't believe what's
going on out there.
401
00:18:03,783 --> 00:18:06,362
Mothers can be so
close-minded sometimes.
402
00:18:06,386 --> 00:18:08,252
Yeah. How'd you put up with her?
403
00:18:08,321 --> 00:18:11,088
I was talking about your mother.
404
00:18:11,157 --> 00:18:15,092
My mother? She's a troublemaker.
405
00:18:15,161 --> 00:18:17,728
Mommy?
406
00:18:21,834 --> 00:18:23,312
All right. Let's Just stop it.
407
00:18:23,336 --> 00:18:26,437
Janet. Whose fault is it?
Her mother's or my mother?
408
00:18:26,506 --> 00:18:27,849
I think they're both wrong.
409
00:18:27,873 --> 00:18:29,273
What?
410
00:18:29,342 --> 00:18:32,654
I think you better get out
there and straighten them out.
411
00:18:32,678 --> 00:18:36,180
Not till she takes back
what she said about Mommy.
412
00:18:36,249 --> 00:18:38,315
I'd rather kiss a toad.
413
00:18:38,384 --> 00:18:39,783
You look like you already did.
414
00:18:39,853 --> 00:18:41,319
I do not! You do, too!
415
00:18:41,387 --> 00:18:45,323
Stop it! Will you
two just grow up?
416
00:18:45,391 --> 00:18:47,658
What's wrong with
her? I don't know.
417
00:18:47,727 --> 00:18:49,727
Janet. Hm?
418
00:18:49,796 --> 00:18:52,441
As soon as Jack packs his
things, we'll be out of your way.
419
00:18:52,465 --> 00:18:55,666
And Terri and I will
be out even sooner.
420
00:18:55,734 --> 00:19:00,271
Fine. Swell. Okay. Sure.
421
00:19:00,340 --> 00:19:04,575
But in the meantime, we
could, you know, just talk it over.
422
00:19:04,643 --> 00:19:09,313
No. Better yet, just let
me ask you a question.
423
00:19:09,382 --> 00:19:11,515
Do you consider
yourselves good mothers?
424
00:19:11,584 --> 00:19:13,462
Well, I certainly do.
425
00:19:13,486 --> 00:19:14,818
So do I.
426
00:19:14,888 --> 00:19:16,832
Then how could you
raise bad children?
427
00:19:16,856 --> 00:19:20,024
We didn't. Well, of course not.
428
00:19:20,093 --> 00:19:21,726
Well, then...
429
00:19:25,031 --> 00:19:29,033
You know, you two should
really be proud of Jack and Terri.
430
00:19:29,101 --> 00:19:31,113
They're two of the finest
people I've ever known.
431
00:19:31,137 --> 00:19:32,602
One time...
432
00:19:32,672 --> 00:19:35,851
I can't help it. Every time
I get around my mother,
433
00:19:35,875 --> 00:19:38,208
I feel like I'm seven
years old again.
434
00:19:38,278 --> 00:19:40,844
Terri, listen. I
feel the same way.
435
00:19:40,913 --> 00:19:43,347
I thought she was gonna
send me to my room.
436
00:19:43,416 --> 00:19:45,615
She did.
437
00:19:45,684 --> 00:19:49,386
Oh, yeah. That's right.
438
00:19:49,455 --> 00:19:52,990
Just once, I would like to win
an argument with my mother.
439
00:19:53,059 --> 00:19:56,126
When I was a kid, the
only way I could do it was
440
00:19:56,195 --> 00:19:58,474
to hold my breath until
my face turned blue.
441
00:20:00,232 --> 00:20:01,644
You wanna give it a try?
442
00:20:01,668 --> 00:20:03,512
Jack! I know, I'm sorry...
443
00:20:03,536 --> 00:20:05,047
Think of something...
444
00:20:05,071 --> 00:20:09,139
You know, listen, Terri. If we
started to behave like adults,
445
00:20:09,208 --> 00:20:13,310
they'd have to treat us like
adults. You might be right.
446
00:20:13,379 --> 00:20:15,012
So why don't we just tell 'em
447
00:20:15,081 --> 00:20:17,514
that we're old enough to
choose who we live with?
448
00:20:17,584 --> 00:20:19,850
Yeah. Let's do it.
449
00:20:19,919 --> 00:20:23,821
Let's go out there and
tell those mothers off.
450
00:20:23,890 --> 00:20:27,224
Oh... Out of the way, Janet.
451
00:20:27,293 --> 00:20:29,438
Get your own mother.
We know what we're doing.
452
00:20:29,462 --> 00:20:31,962
Listen, you two.
453
00:20:32,031 --> 00:20:34,551
Ya either trust us, or ya don't.
454
00:20:34,601 --> 00:20:37,068
Darling. Of course we do.
455
00:20:37,136 --> 00:20:39,971
Sweetheart, we've been so wrong.
456
00:20:40,039 --> 00:20:41,405
Oh, Mom!
457
00:20:41,474 --> 00:20:44,620
Oh, gosh. This is better
than holding your breath.
458
00:20:44,644 --> 00:20:46,255
Told you we knew
what we were doing.
459
00:20:46,279 --> 00:20:47,478
Son?
460
00:20:47,547 --> 00:20:51,081
Can you forgive
a foolish old lady?
461
00:20:51,150 --> 00:20:53,584
And Terri, darling?
462
00:20:53,653 --> 00:20:56,187
Can you forgive an
even more foolish,
463
00:20:56,255 --> 00:20:58,422
though younger, lady?
464
00:20:58,491 --> 00:21:00,524
Of course I can,
465
00:21:00,593 --> 00:21:02,471
Mom. Oh, thank you, sweetheart.
466
00:21:02,495 --> 00:21:06,029
Now, I'm just gonna go home
and stop meddling in your life.
467
00:21:06,099 --> 00:21:08,566
Wait a minute, Mom.
How come you stopped by?
468
00:21:08,634 --> 00:21:10,267
Oh, I forgot.
469
00:21:10,336 --> 00:21:14,304
I was shopping, and I saw this nightie
I thought would be perfect for you.
470
00:21:14,373 --> 00:21:15,373
Wow wow wow!
471
00:21:18,444 --> 00:21:21,912
Flannel pajamas are so much
more practical, don't you think?
472
00:21:21,981 --> 00:21:23,747
You're right.
473
00:21:23,816 --> 00:21:27,718
Maybe I can get some
before the stores close.
474
00:21:27,786 --> 00:21:29,698
It was so nice to meet you.
475
00:21:29,722 --> 00:21:32,289
Yes. We must do
this again sometime.
476
00:21:32,358 --> 00:21:34,658
Well...
477
00:21:34,727 --> 00:21:38,173
Goodbye, darling. Goodbye,
Mom. So good to see you.
478
00:21:38,197 --> 00:21:40,731
Here. I'll open the door.
479
00:21:40,800 --> 00:21:41,810
Bye!
480
00:21:41,834 --> 00:21:43,300
Bye-bye, now. Bye.
481
00:21:43,368 --> 00:21:46,604
Girls, it was just wonderful
482
00:21:46,672 --> 00:21:48,038
to see you again.
483
00:21:48,107 --> 00:21:51,041
Listen. You've got to get
Jack to bring you to San Diego.
484
00:21:51,110 --> 00:21:52,709
Oh, I would just
love having you.
485
00:21:52,778 --> 00:21:54,878
Mom, I'll walk you
down to the car.
486
00:21:54,947 --> 00:21:56,267
Jack, guess what? Huh?
487
00:21:56,316 --> 00:21:57,247
Guess what?
488
00:21:57,316 --> 00:21:58,248
What?
489
00:21:58,317 --> 00:22:00,283
I just spoke to that
Hank Thompson,
490
00:22:00,352 --> 00:22:02,152
and he's gonna
print a retraction.
491
00:22:02,221 --> 00:22:05,601
Oh, really? Oh, wonderful.
Thank you, Mr. Furley.
492
00:22:05,625 --> 00:22:07,791
Yeah. He's gonna take
back everything he said
493
00:22:07,860 --> 00:22:09,593
about this apartment
being run down.
494
00:22:12,030 --> 00:22:15,832
Oh, and by the way, he's gonna take
back what he said about you kids, too.
495
00:22:15,902 --> 00:22:17,401
How'd you get him to do that?
496
00:22:17,470 --> 00:22:18,401
Simple.
497
00:22:18,470 --> 00:22:21,171
I told him Jack was gay.
498
00:22:27,312 --> 00:22:30,180
Well, I could
have told him that.
499
00:22:32,151 --> 00:22:34,591
Jack always was a happy boy.
500
00:22:52,438 --> 00:22:54,416
- What is going on?
- I don't know.
501
00:22:54,440 --> 00:22:57,007
Open the door and find out.
502
00:22:57,076 --> 00:22:58,887
Extra, extra! Read all about it!
503
00:22:58,911 --> 00:23:00,155
What's up, Mr. Furley?
504
00:23:00,179 --> 00:23:02,579
Ralph Furley gets things done!
505
00:23:02,648 --> 00:23:04,114
That's in the paper?
506
00:23:04,183 --> 00:23:06,717
No. Hank Thompson's column.
507
00:23:06,786 --> 00:23:08,529
Well, what does it say?
508
00:23:08,553 --> 00:23:10,298
Don't know. I
haven't read it yet.
509
00:23:10,322 --> 00:23:13,190
I thought we'd all enjoy
the apology together.
510
00:23:13,259 --> 00:23:15,604
Gee, Mr. Furley. You
didn't have to do that.
511
00:23:15,628 --> 00:23:17,372
You don't have
to thank me, Jack.
512
00:23:17,396 --> 00:23:21,264
After all, I wouldn't want people
to get the wrong idea about you.
513
00:23:21,334 --> 00:23:25,869
Mr. Furley, could
you just read it?
514
00:23:25,938 --> 00:23:28,283
You gotta know how to talk
to those newspaper guys.
515
00:23:28,307 --> 00:23:30,285
You gotta be clear and direct,
516
00:23:30,309 --> 00:23:32,320
and make sure they
get everything right.
517
00:23:32,344 --> 00:23:34,879
Read, please. All right.
518
00:23:34,947 --> 00:23:36,558
Let's see. Here it is.
519
00:23:36,582 --> 00:23:39,383
Okay, listen to this.
520
00:23:39,452 --> 00:23:42,485
"Correction."
521
00:23:42,555 --> 00:23:45,388
See. Like I was tellin' ya.
522
00:23:45,457 --> 00:23:48,470
Would you please read
it and get it over with?
523
00:23:48,494 --> 00:23:52,496
"Hank Thompson
wishes to apologize
524
00:23:52,564 --> 00:23:55,599
"to the subjects of
my recent column.
525
00:23:55,667 --> 00:23:58,869
"Not only is the
building not run down,
526
00:24:01,773 --> 00:24:06,110
"but such improper behavior
would never be tolerated there.
527
00:24:06,178 --> 00:24:09,579
According to Ralph
Furley, their gay landlord."
528
00:24:21,927 --> 00:24:24,887
Closed-Captioned by J.R.
Media Services, Inc. Burbank, CA
529
00:24:40,513 --> 00:24:44,381
♪♪
530
00:24:44,449 --> 00:24:47,818
Three's Company was videotaped
in front of a studio audience.
36460
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