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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:11,879 --> 00:00:13,423 ♪ come and knock on our door ♪ 2 00:00:13,447 --> 00:00:14,925 ♪ come and knock on our door ♪ 3 00:00:14,949 --> 00:00:16,426 ♪ we've been waiting for you ♪ 4 00:00:16,450 --> 00:00:17,928 ♪ we've been waiting for you ♪ 5 00:00:17,952 --> 00:00:20,964 ♪ where the kisses are Hers and hers and his ♪ 6 00:00:20,988 --> 00:00:23,533 ♪ three's company too ♪ 7 00:00:23,557 --> 00:00:25,134 ♪ come and dance on our floor ♪ 8 00:00:25,158 --> 00:00:27,003 ♪ come and dance on our floor ♪ 9 00:00:27,027 --> 00:00:29,973 - ♪ take a step that is new ♪ - ♪ take a step that is new ♪ 10 00:00:29,997 --> 00:00:33,276 ♪ we've a lovable space That needs your face ♪ 11 00:00:33,300 --> 00:00:36,601 ♪ three's company too ♪ 12 00:00:42,576 --> 00:00:45,155 - ♪ down at our rendezvous ♪ - ♪ down at our rendezvous ♪ 13 00:00:45,179 --> 00:00:46,911 ♪ three is company too ♪ 14 00:00:54,855 --> 00:00:57,934 - ♪ down at our rendezvous ♪ - ♪ down at our rendezvous ♪ 15 00:00:57,958 --> 00:01:00,925 ♪ three is company too. ♪ 16 00:01:03,364 --> 00:01:05,342 Hey, janet, is my Shirt pressed yet? 17 00:01:05,366 --> 00:01:07,777 Oh, sorry, jack, I haven't Had a chance to get to it. 18 00:01:07,801 --> 00:01:10,781 It'll probably get wrinkled At the wrestling match anyway. 19 00:01:10,805 --> 00:01:14,184 What wrestling match? I thought You and cheryl had a date here tonight. 20 00:01:14,208 --> 00:01:16,675 That wrestling match. 21 00:01:18,545 --> 00:01:20,612 Cowabunga! 22 00:01:22,683 --> 00:01:24,694 Say, could you put That on a hanger for me? 23 00:01:24,718 --> 00:01:26,729 No wonder you got a Chest cold last week. 24 00:01:26,753 --> 00:01:28,765 Jack. 25 00:01:28,789 --> 00:01:30,801 Whoo! You can see Right through this thing! 26 00:01:32,860 --> 00:01:35,272 - janet: it's open! - hi, kids. 27 00:01:35,296 --> 00:01:37,162 - janet: hi. - oh, hi, mr.Furley. 28 00:01:42,302 --> 00:01:44,269 Entertaining tonight? 29 00:01:45,906 --> 00:01:48,685 No, see, mr. Furley, this Isn't mine, it belongs to janet. 30 00:01:48,709 --> 00:01:51,069 Oh... And she let's you wear it? 31 00:01:57,984 --> 00:01:59,996 What can we do For you, mr. Furley? 32 00:02:00,020 --> 00:02:03,266 Oh, they delivered this magazine To my apartment by mistake. 33 00:02:03,290 --> 00:02:05,702 - oh. - some kind of free, Introductory offer. 34 00:02:05,726 --> 00:02:07,737 Oh, thanks. 35 00:02:07,761 --> 00:02:09,773 Oh, no, listen to this. 36 00:02:09,797 --> 00:02:12,108 "Psychic predicts Undersea plant life 37 00:02:12,132 --> 00:02:14,744 Is the cure for male Potency problems." 38 00:02:14,768 --> 00:02:19,749 Yeah, can you believe the things They'll print to sell magazines? 39 00:02:19,773 --> 00:02:24,387 I just can't get over how Gullible some people are. 40 00:02:24,411 --> 00:02:29,058 Can you imagine, seaweed, the Answer to male potency problems? 41 00:02:29,082 --> 00:02:31,094 - hi, everybody! - hi. 42 00:02:31,118 --> 00:02:35,053 Oh, mr. Furley, I brought those Seaweed pills you asked for. 43 00:02:36,790 --> 00:02:39,736 Seaweed pills? I didn't Ask for any seaweed pills. 44 00:02:39,760 --> 00:02:41,771 Sure you did, this morning... 45 00:02:41,795 --> 00:02:43,806 I said hay fever Pills! Hay fever pills! 46 00:02:43,830 --> 00:02:47,610 I get strong hay fever. In fact I Feel an attack coming on right now! 47 00:02:56,977 --> 00:02:59,889 - what's the matter with him? - I don't know, you go find out. 48 00:02:59,913 --> 00:03:02,325 And you go after Him too, janet. I think... 49 00:03:02,349 --> 00:03:05,027 Oh, jack stop it. We know, Cheryl is coming over. 50 00:03:05,051 --> 00:03:07,464 - we can take a hint. - oh, okay, thank you. 51 00:03:07,488 --> 00:03:10,166 Cindy, could you help me Move this ironing board? 52 00:03:10,190 --> 00:03:12,335 Oh, don't bother. I can do it myself. 53 00:03:12,359 --> 00:03:14,370 - would you just hold the iron? - sure. 54 00:03:14,394 --> 00:03:16,327 Thanks. 55 00:03:18,532 --> 00:03:21,711 Jack, you were supposed To hold it by the handle. 56 00:03:21,735 --> 00:03:25,448 - yeah, I know, I forgot. - well, I'll just get this. 57 00:03:25,472 --> 00:03:28,084 Cindy, we got a little bit Of a problem here. Cindy... 58 00:03:28,108 --> 00:03:30,120 - I'm sorry. - just lift it up. 59 00:03:34,214 --> 00:03:36,359 Let me get it, let me get it. 60 00:03:36,383 --> 00:03:39,462 Whoo-ow! 61 00:03:39,486 --> 00:03:43,566 Get back! Back off, all right? 62 00:03:43,590 --> 00:03:45,601 Okay, just... 63 00:03:45,625 --> 00:03:48,038 - get it away from me. - yeah, I'll get it... 64 00:03:48,062 --> 00:03:50,339 I'll get this right Into the kitchen. 65 00:03:50,363 --> 00:03:52,175 It's alive, isn't it? 66 00:03:52,199 --> 00:03:53,328 All right, you got it? 67 00:03:53,352 --> 00:03:55,466 I got the iron right Here. Got it, thanks. 68 00:03:57,804 --> 00:03:59,515 Anything left for me to do? 69 00:03:59,539 --> 00:04:02,006 No, cindy's done It all, thank you. 70 00:04:04,611 --> 00:04:07,490 Let's see. Got the candles, The matches, table set... 71 00:04:07,514 --> 00:04:09,025 Champagne... I forgot The champagne. 72 00:04:09,049 --> 00:04:11,027 Be careful, jack! That's a swinging door. 73 00:04:11,051 --> 00:04:13,763 Right, right. Cindy, I'm Coming in the kitchen now 74 00:04:13,787 --> 00:04:15,627 To get a bottle of champagne. 75 00:04:16,557 --> 00:04:18,568 I got it! 76 00:04:18,592 --> 00:04:20,525 I got it. 77 00:04:21,995 --> 00:04:23,806 I'm never gonna be Ready for cheryl tonight. 78 00:04:23,830 --> 00:04:26,176 By the time she gets Here, I'll be in the hospital! 79 00:04:26,200 --> 00:04:28,211 Come on, jack, don't get upset. 80 00:04:28,235 --> 00:04:30,247 Janet, I can't help it. 81 00:04:30,271 --> 00:04:34,584 Last night, cheryl and I composed a symphony. 82 00:04:34,608 --> 00:04:36,568 And tonight... We're gonna play it. 83 00:04:37,811 --> 00:04:41,057 And I don't want anything To spoil my evening. 84 00:04:41,081 --> 00:04:43,092 That's her! That's her! 85 00:04:43,116 --> 00:04:45,127 I don't know What I'm gonna do... 86 00:04:45,151 --> 00:04:47,830 Cindy, let's go. Jack, will you Please just think positively? 87 00:04:47,854 --> 00:04:50,433 Nothing is going to spoil Your evening with cheryl. 88 00:04:50,457 --> 00:04:52,469 Right, right. 89 00:04:52,493 --> 00:04:55,438 Think positive, nothing is going To spoil my evening with cheryl. 90 00:04:55,462 --> 00:04:57,795 Nothing is going to spoil My evening with cheryl. 91 00:04:59,633 --> 00:05:02,445 Jack tripper? I'm andrew Gainer, cheryl's father. 92 00:05:02,469 --> 00:05:05,114 Something just Spoiled my evening. 93 00:05:05,138 --> 00:05:07,150 May I come in? 94 00:05:07,174 --> 00:05:09,285 No... I mean, yes... I mean, please... 95 00:05:09,309 --> 00:05:11,320 There's no way I would not Invite you in... Yes, please. 96 00:05:11,344 --> 00:05:13,757 Thank you. Cheryl said She was coming over here. 97 00:05:13,781 --> 00:05:16,192 Only to pick me up and then We're going right out in the open. 98 00:05:16,216 --> 00:05:19,763 - that's why I'm here, cheryl... - is a very special girl. 99 00:05:19,787 --> 00:05:22,365 Not like all the others, Not that I know any others... 100 00:05:22,389 --> 00:05:26,402 Since I met cheryl, I'm a one-woman Kinda guy. No other woman exists. 101 00:05:26,426 --> 00:05:29,494 I don't know, but I Can't find my pantyhose! 102 00:05:31,865 --> 00:05:34,009 Except my sister. 103 00:05:34,033 --> 00:05:36,368 Hi! See ya later, jack. 104 00:05:39,772 --> 00:05:41,750 My... My cousin. 105 00:05:41,774 --> 00:05:45,421 Mr. Gainer, I don't want to Give you the wrong impression. 106 00:05:45,445 --> 00:05:48,924 This is a respectable apartment. Nothing Goes on around here at all, nothing. 107 00:05:48,948 --> 00:05:50,960 Jack! Jack! 108 00:05:50,984 --> 00:05:52,995 I've done it! I've done it! 109 00:05:53,019 --> 00:05:54,964 The ramsey twins Are coming over! 110 00:05:54,988 --> 00:05:57,434 Uh, I'm not interested. 111 00:05:57,458 --> 00:06:00,603 But, you should be. Don't you you see? 112 00:06:00,627 --> 00:06:02,806 You can take your choice. It won't make any difference. 113 00:06:02,830 --> 00:06:03,830 Larry! 114 00:06:06,166 --> 00:06:08,178 I told you, I'm not interested. 115 00:06:08,202 --> 00:06:11,614 Oh... Oh... Oh! Sure! Well, who can blame ya? 116 00:06:11,638 --> 00:06:15,358 You gotta be worn out from That lady you were with last night. 117 00:06:16,743 --> 00:06:19,303 Whoa! Talk about Your hickey bait! 118 00:06:20,814 --> 00:06:22,825 - larry, this is mr. Gainer. - who? 119 00:06:22,849 --> 00:06:24,461 - cheryl's father. - cheryl? 120 00:06:24,485 --> 00:06:26,584 The "Hickey bait." 121 00:06:28,621 --> 00:06:30,767 Wait a second, I'm in The wrong apartment. 122 00:06:30,791 --> 00:06:32,802 This isn't 201. 123 00:06:32,826 --> 00:06:34,971 Where am I? 124 00:06:34,995 --> 00:06:36,973 Who are you? 125 00:06:36,997 --> 00:06:40,443 Give up, all right? Sir, I have a confession. 126 00:06:40,467 --> 00:06:43,245 Those two girls are Really my roommates, and... 127 00:06:43,269 --> 00:06:45,748 Jack, the only Reason I stopped by 128 00:06:45,772 --> 00:06:48,985 Was to drop off cheryl's Driver's license. She forgot it. 129 00:06:49,009 --> 00:06:51,187 Then, you're not interested In my living arrangement? 130 00:06:51,211 --> 00:06:53,089 I didn't say that. 131 00:06:53,113 --> 00:06:56,359 I'll just let you two get to Know each other a little better. 132 00:06:56,383 --> 00:06:58,627 I just dropped by to Borrow some wine, excuse me. 133 00:06:58,651 --> 00:07:01,463 Nice hearing from Your mouth, larry. 134 00:07:01,487 --> 00:07:03,500 Sit down, jack. 135 00:07:03,524 --> 00:07:05,501 - look, mr. Gainer, I just... - jack. 136 00:07:05,525 --> 00:07:08,726 - excuse me. - I... 137 00:07:12,899 --> 00:07:14,699 Jack. 138 00:07:16,269 --> 00:07:20,249 You probably think sharing an Apartment with two girls is healthy. 139 00:07:20,273 --> 00:07:23,486 You know, contemporary, Without any hang-ups. 140 00:07:23,510 --> 00:07:25,488 - well, uh... - I agree with you. 141 00:07:25,512 --> 00:07:27,557 You do? 142 00:07:27,581 --> 00:07:30,459 You see, jack, since my Wife died some years ago, 143 00:07:30,483 --> 00:07:33,696 I've spent a lot of time with Cheryl and her friends and... 144 00:07:33,720 --> 00:07:36,632 I've come to understand and... 145 00:07:36,656 --> 00:07:38,634 Envy the openness Of your generation. 146 00:07:38,658 --> 00:07:40,803 - well, thank you. - as a matter of fact... 147 00:07:40,827 --> 00:07:43,205 - if I were 20 years younger... - now, hang on a second. 148 00:07:43,229 --> 00:07:45,255 You make it sound like You're over the hill. 149 00:07:45,279 --> 00:07:47,143 You look great. How Old are you? 50? 55? 150 00:07:47,167 --> 00:07:49,000 46. 151 00:07:52,606 --> 00:07:54,617 You don't look a day over 42. 152 00:07:54,641 --> 00:07:58,288 I'm sure there are girls out There that'd be crazy about you. 153 00:07:58,312 --> 00:08:01,791 That's nice of you to say so, but, I'm afraid time has passed me by. 154 00:08:01,815 --> 00:08:04,194 I wouldn't fit and I Wouldn't know what to say. 155 00:08:04,218 --> 00:08:06,963 - it's simple, all you Need is a few tips. - tips? From who? 156 00:08:06,987 --> 00:08:11,300 Well, naturally, from somebody Who's been around, you know? 157 00:08:11,324 --> 00:08:12,836 Somebody who knows about women. 158 00:08:12,860 --> 00:08:15,871 Thanks for the build-up, jack. 159 00:08:15,895 --> 00:08:17,907 Excuse me. 160 00:08:17,931 --> 00:08:19,942 I believe this is my area. 161 00:08:19,966 --> 00:08:22,912 Mr. Gainer, all you've got To do is remember one thing. 162 00:08:22,936 --> 00:08:24,947 When it comes to Today's liberated woman, 163 00:08:24,971 --> 00:08:26,982 Don't play games. 164 00:08:27,006 --> 00:08:29,619 It's insulting to Their intelligence. 165 00:08:29,643 --> 00:08:31,788 Directness is the Only way to go. 166 00:08:31,812 --> 00:08:34,290 You mean like telling them Exactly what your feelings are? 167 00:08:34,314 --> 00:08:37,193 No, like spilling Wine on her dress. 168 00:08:37,217 --> 00:08:41,085 It's not easy getting an intelligent Woman out of her clothes. 169 00:08:45,258 --> 00:08:46,636 What does o-u-t spell? 170 00:08:46,660 --> 00:08:48,037 - that's out. - that's you. 171 00:08:48,061 --> 00:08:49,405 - I was just leaving. - good bye. 172 00:08:49,429 --> 00:08:51,929 A genius is never Appreciated in his own time. 173 00:08:53,766 --> 00:08:56,179 Please, don't pay any Attention to him, mr. Gainer. 174 00:08:56,203 --> 00:08:58,348 You don't have to Rely on cheap shots. 175 00:08:58,372 --> 00:09:01,650 Today's woman is frank, She's free, she's open. 176 00:09:01,674 --> 00:09:03,686 Yes, but how do you handle that? 177 00:09:03,710 --> 00:09:07,556 First of all, at the beginning, Don't come on strong. 178 00:09:07,580 --> 00:09:10,715 You want to relax, Let your hair down... 179 00:09:15,222 --> 00:09:17,662 Let me put that another way. 180 00:09:18,258 --> 00:09:20,269 You want to be laid back. 181 00:09:20,293 --> 00:09:22,305 Laid back? 182 00:09:22,329 --> 00:09:24,769 Well, you know, Sorta like... Hey. 183 00:09:25,632 --> 00:09:31,202 Oh, you mean like... Hey. 184 00:09:32,539 --> 00:09:34,650 Maybe you just better Take off your tie. 185 00:09:34,674 --> 00:09:36,385 That might be as loose As you want to go. 186 00:09:36,409 --> 00:09:38,121 I see, okay, then what? 187 00:09:38,145 --> 00:09:41,790 Well, talk to her, Ask her about her job. 188 00:09:41,814 --> 00:09:43,860 Today's woman is Very intelligent. 189 00:09:43,884 --> 00:09:47,329 Wait, shouldn't I compliment her on Her appearance? I mean, we used to. 190 00:09:47,353 --> 00:09:49,032 Mmm... 191 00:09:49,056 --> 00:09:51,467 You can if you want, it's A little old-fashioned. 192 00:09:51,491 --> 00:09:54,370 What the hell, yeah. Tell her You like her hair, you like her eyes. 193 00:09:54,394 --> 00:09:56,539 I understand, I ask Her about her job, 194 00:09:56,563 --> 00:09:58,574 Then I'd compliment Her on her appearance, 195 00:09:58,598 --> 00:10:01,444 - anything else? - invite her to dinner. 196 00:10:01,468 --> 00:10:04,213 Oh, right! Take her out to The finest restaurant in town. 197 00:10:04,237 --> 00:10:08,251 Wrong. Take her to a dark, Intimate little hideaway, 198 00:10:08,275 --> 00:10:11,721 - like the blue grotto. - the blue grotto? 199 00:10:11,745 --> 00:10:13,889 Yeah, after being In a place like that, 200 00:10:13,913 --> 00:10:16,225 She'll be in the right Mood for what comes next. 201 00:10:16,249 --> 00:10:18,182 What... What comes next? 202 00:10:19,252 --> 00:10:21,264 You're kidding. 203 00:10:21,288 --> 00:10:24,800 One other thing, even Though her lips may say "Stop," 204 00:10:24,824 --> 00:10:27,136 Her eyes will say "Go." 205 00:10:29,929 --> 00:10:31,941 Okay, jack, I'm gonna... Oh. 206 00:10:31,965 --> 00:10:34,243 Janet, I'd like you to meet Mr. Gainer, cheryl's father. 207 00:10:34,267 --> 00:10:37,412 - oh, how do you do? - how do you do? 208 00:10:37,436 --> 00:10:39,303 How do you like your job? 209 00:10:41,641 --> 00:10:44,053 My job? Jack must Have told you that I... 210 00:10:44,077 --> 00:10:46,578 Ah, you have the loveliest eyes. 211 00:10:47,714 --> 00:10:49,692 Thank you. 212 00:10:49,716 --> 00:10:52,036 It's a little warm In here, isn't it. 213 00:10:54,220 --> 00:10:58,834 You know, the way you Do your hair, I just love it. 214 00:10:58,858 --> 00:11:00,636 Oh, well, thank you. 215 00:11:00,660 --> 00:11:02,772 Hang on, hang on. There's one... 216 00:11:02,796 --> 00:11:07,010 - mr. Gainer, would you like To have a glass of wine? - andrew, and I would love it. 217 00:11:07,034 --> 00:11:10,847 Sorry, we have no wine, all we've got is This bottle of tijuana champagne here. 218 00:11:10,871 --> 00:11:13,682 - why don't we go out For that drink? - I would like that. 219 00:11:13,706 --> 00:11:15,351 I'd rather stay here. 220 00:11:15,375 --> 00:11:17,842 Good, we'd rather You stayed here too. 221 00:11:19,512 --> 00:11:21,391 - I'll just go And get my purse. - okay. 222 00:11:21,415 --> 00:11:25,728 Mr. Gainer, could I speak To you for just one second? 223 00:11:25,752 --> 00:11:27,763 Sure. 224 00:11:27,787 --> 00:11:29,998 I had no idea you were Gonna ask janet out. 225 00:11:30,022 --> 00:11:31,367 Neither did I. 226 00:11:31,391 --> 00:11:34,970 But with your help, everything Seems to be going so great. 227 00:11:34,994 --> 00:11:36,839 - thanks. - wait... Wait, I didn't mean... 228 00:11:36,863 --> 00:11:39,808 Don't worry, I can handle It myself from here on out. 229 00:11:39,832 --> 00:11:41,877 - janet, are you ready? - yes. 230 00:11:41,901 --> 00:11:43,913 Have a wonderful evening, jack. 231 00:11:43,937 --> 00:11:47,216 - where are we gonna go? - I know just the spot for us. 232 00:11:47,240 --> 00:11:50,174 Ever heard of a place Called the blue grotto? 233 00:12:03,757 --> 00:12:06,502 Hi, jack. I didn't know Janet's father was in town. 234 00:12:06,526 --> 00:12:09,939 That wasn't her father, That was her date! 235 00:12:09,963 --> 00:12:11,974 Her date?! 236 00:12:11,998 --> 00:12:15,778 - but he... He's my age. - and what's more, He's on the make! 237 00:12:15,802 --> 00:12:17,814 What? 238 00:12:17,838 --> 00:12:19,648 I can't believe it! 239 00:12:19,672 --> 00:12:23,886 A middle-aged man like that, Running around town, chasing girls. 240 00:12:23,910 --> 00:12:26,489 Trying to make out and... 241 00:12:26,513 --> 00:12:30,426 - hey, what's wrong with that? - mr. Furley! 242 00:12:30,450 --> 00:12:33,429 What are we supposed to do? Sit in A rocking chair and take up knitting? 243 00:12:33,453 --> 00:12:34,606 No, no, mr. Furley... 244 00:12:34,630 --> 00:12:36,933 Just because we're a Tad past the age of 21 245 00:12:36,957 --> 00:12:39,723 Doesn't mean we've lost That old urge to merge! 246 00:12:42,062 --> 00:12:44,073 Mr. Furley, what about janet? 247 00:12:44,097 --> 00:12:45,541 Oh, you think I could Get lucky with her? 248 00:12:45,565 --> 00:12:47,676 Yeah, maybe a little candle Light, wine and soft music... 249 00:12:47,700 --> 00:12:51,480 Mr. Furley! We're talking About our janet and that old man! 250 00:12:51,504 --> 00:12:53,249 Yeah, you better do Something about him! 251 00:12:53,273 --> 00:12:56,452 - like what? - tell that over-the-hill Don juan to buzz off! 252 00:12:56,476 --> 00:12:58,488 - be a man! - oh, I can't. 253 00:12:58,512 --> 00:13:01,032 Oh, that's right, I Keep forgetting. 254 00:13:02,415 --> 00:13:04,560 You can still tell Him to buzz off. 255 00:13:04,584 --> 00:13:07,497 I can't, janet would kill me. 256 00:13:07,521 --> 00:13:11,200 - cheryl! - jack, did I just see My father leave with janet? 257 00:13:11,224 --> 00:13:13,368 Yes! And he should Be ashamed of himself! 258 00:13:13,392 --> 00:13:15,493 He's old enough To be your father! 259 00:13:20,199 --> 00:13:22,133 My father and janet?! 260 00:13:23,202 --> 00:13:25,214 On a date? 261 00:13:25,238 --> 00:13:27,249 That's wonderful. 262 00:13:27,273 --> 00:13:30,052 I knew you'd feel the Same was as... What?! 263 00:13:30,076 --> 00:13:33,022 Well, it's the first time Dad's been out in years. 264 00:13:33,046 --> 00:13:35,057 That's why we can't Leave them alone! 265 00:13:35,081 --> 00:13:38,160 What are you talking about? 266 00:13:38,184 --> 00:13:41,430 When you've gone without Water for a long time, 267 00:13:41,454 --> 00:13:43,787 You can get awfully thirsty. 268 00:13:45,191 --> 00:13:48,171 Oh, jack, I had no idea Janet was that desperate! 269 00:13:48,195 --> 00:13:51,407 Are you kidding... Not Janet, your father! 270 00:13:51,431 --> 00:13:54,076 Oh, the poor man's Been so lonely, 271 00:13:54,100 --> 00:13:56,245 He's probably forgotten What to do with a woman. 272 00:13:56,269 --> 00:13:59,137 Not anymore, I Just reminded him. 273 00:14:00,406 --> 00:14:03,219 We're talking about Two consenting adults. 274 00:14:03,243 --> 00:14:05,388 No, we're not. I never Consented to anything. 275 00:14:05,412 --> 00:14:07,423 Not you. 276 00:14:07,447 --> 00:14:09,458 Now, stop thinking about them. 277 00:14:09,482 --> 00:14:11,493 And start thinking about us. 278 00:14:11,517 --> 00:14:13,529 I'd better go after janet. 279 00:14:13,553 --> 00:14:15,486 No, you won't. We're Not leaving here. 280 00:14:17,224 --> 00:14:19,368 Wait a minute, I Just... Look at this! 281 00:14:19,392 --> 00:14:21,903 She forgot to take Her allergy pills! 282 00:14:21,927 --> 00:14:24,606 - jack, is this a trick? - does this look like a trick? 283 00:14:24,630 --> 00:14:26,641 - 99% organic seaweed? - right. 284 00:14:26,665 --> 00:14:28,577 What's she allergic To, the ocean? 285 00:14:28,601 --> 00:14:32,315 Yeah, that's right, I gotta get these To her before high tide, come on. 286 00:14:45,251 --> 00:14:47,263 My, it's dark in here. 287 00:14:47,287 --> 00:14:51,233 Yeah, you're right. I can't even See my hand in front of my face. 288 00:14:51,257 --> 00:14:53,269 That's not where you hand is. 289 00:14:53,293 --> 00:14:55,693 Oh, I'm sorry. 290 00:14:56,929 --> 00:14:58,173 - yes? - oh, hi. 291 00:14:58,197 --> 00:14:59,608 Can I help you? 292 00:14:59,632 --> 00:15:02,010 I'm looking for a couple, an Older man with a young woman. 293 00:15:02,034 --> 00:15:05,469 That's all we got Here, take your pick. 294 00:15:09,208 --> 00:15:10,286 Let's try over here. 295 00:15:13,579 --> 00:15:16,592 - jack, is that you? - janet, hi. 296 00:15:16,616 --> 00:15:19,262 - what are you two doing here? - don't worry, daddy, We're not staying. 297 00:15:19,286 --> 00:15:21,297 Oh, what a disappointment. 298 00:15:21,321 --> 00:15:24,300 Well, since you're Disappointed, we'll stay. 299 00:15:24,324 --> 00:15:26,468 - jack! - cheryl, you sit Next to your father. 300 00:15:26,492 --> 00:15:29,171 And I'll sit next to my good Friend, jan... Isn't this cozy? 301 00:15:29,195 --> 00:15:31,740 Jack, aren't you Forgetting why we're here? 302 00:15:31,764 --> 00:15:33,776 Just why are you here? 303 00:15:33,800 --> 00:15:37,501 Jack was concerned 'cause janet went Out on a date without taking her pill. 304 00:15:44,043 --> 00:15:46,055 My what? 305 00:15:46,079 --> 00:15:48,090 Your seaweed pills. 306 00:15:48,114 --> 00:15:51,060 She's always forgetting, We have to remind her, 307 00:15:51,084 --> 00:15:54,296 But, still she gets by with a Little kelp from her friends. 308 00:15:54,320 --> 00:15:57,633 It's... Kelp, seaweed, Song, sailors... 309 00:15:57,657 --> 00:16:02,505 Speaking of weeds, jack, couldn't you Disappear and spring up someplace else? 310 00:16:04,564 --> 00:16:08,344 Perhaps we should go somewhere Else and get a bite to eat. 311 00:16:08,368 --> 00:16:11,013 - I'd love that... - not you, jack, just janet and me. 312 00:16:11,037 --> 00:16:14,349 Hey, that's fair. Why don't we Have just one little farewell drink? 313 00:16:14,373 --> 00:16:16,785 - jack! - it'll be real quick... Waiter! 314 00:16:16,809 --> 00:16:18,854 - it'll happen real quick. - yes? Yes? 315 00:16:18,878 --> 00:16:20,723 What kind of wines do you have? 316 00:16:20,747 --> 00:16:23,025 - well, we've got... - we'll each have a glass of white wine. 317 00:16:23,049 --> 00:16:25,061 Four white wines. 318 00:16:25,085 --> 00:16:27,263 Waiter, with a little club soda. 319 00:16:27,287 --> 00:16:28,930 Four white wine spritzers. 320 00:16:28,954 --> 00:16:32,267 Yeah, waiter, I'm sorry, You busy? One moment. 321 00:16:32,291 --> 00:16:34,502 A splash of Grenadine in each one. 322 00:16:34,526 --> 00:16:36,938 - grenadine? - yeah, and throw in An ounce of rum. 323 00:16:36,962 --> 00:16:40,342 That's my own drink, I call It "The tripper spritzer." 324 00:16:40,366 --> 00:16:42,833 I'd hate to tell You what I call it. 325 00:16:43,937 --> 00:16:45,869 I'm with you, buddy. 326 00:16:46,940 --> 00:16:49,084 Would you excuse Us for just a moment? 327 00:16:49,108 --> 00:16:51,253 - jack, may I speak to you? - uh, yeah. 328 00:16:51,277 --> 00:16:54,256 - all right, what are You trying to pull? - I'm trying to warn you... 329 00:16:54,280 --> 00:16:56,425 Ah-ah-ah! Don't you dare Say another word, jack. 330 00:16:56,449 --> 00:16:59,762 Andrew is one of the most Considerate men I've ever been out with. 331 00:16:59,786 --> 00:17:02,364 Janet, I'm shocked at How easily you're fooled. 332 00:17:02,388 --> 00:17:04,100 The man is only after one thing! 333 00:17:04,124 --> 00:17:06,935 Ah! Look at the pot Calling the kettle black. 334 00:17:06,959 --> 00:17:09,660 It's not your kettle he's after. 335 00:17:11,564 --> 00:17:13,542 And just how do you know? 336 00:17:13,566 --> 00:17:16,912 Listen, any guy who would Ask you about your job, 337 00:17:16,936 --> 00:17:20,148 Compliment your hair and Take off his tie on the first date 338 00:17:20,172 --> 00:17:21,617 Is only after one thing. 339 00:17:21,641 --> 00:17:23,118 - what?! - that's right! 340 00:17:23,142 --> 00:17:25,253 Now, I'll make an excuse and Meet you at the door, move. 341 00:17:25,277 --> 00:17:27,122 Jack! Now listen to me. 342 00:17:27,146 --> 00:17:29,625 - janet, I can't breathe. - that is the idea. 343 00:17:29,649 --> 00:17:33,595 Jack, what happens when I go on A date is up to me, not you, right? 344 00:17:33,619 --> 00:17:36,031 - mm-hmm. - and you are never gonna Interfere again, right? 345 00:17:36,055 --> 00:17:38,066 - no, I'm not. - you absolutely promise? 346 00:17:38,090 --> 00:17:39,602 - soul promise. - okay, you can breathe now. 347 00:17:39,626 --> 00:17:41,470 I paid the check, why Don't we get out of here? 348 00:17:41,494 --> 00:17:43,105 - good idea. - jack! 349 00:17:43,129 --> 00:17:44,906 You are not thinking Of following us, are you? 350 00:17:44,930 --> 00:17:47,910 - no, no, no. - good. You just Saved your life. 351 00:17:47,934 --> 00:17:49,400 Thank you. 352 00:17:55,375 --> 00:17:58,553 Well, I guess janet can Take care of herself. 353 00:17:58,577 --> 00:18:00,589 I... I was worried about her. 354 00:18:00,613 --> 00:18:02,624 I know. 355 00:18:02,648 --> 00:18:05,227 But now, it's just you and me. 356 00:18:05,251 --> 00:18:08,531 Yeah, and you know What we're gonna do? 357 00:18:08,555 --> 00:18:10,131 What? 358 00:18:10,155 --> 00:18:14,102 Nothing. 359 00:18:14,126 --> 00:18:16,059 Good bye. 360 00:18:21,700 --> 00:18:23,634 None for me, thanks. 361 00:18:28,875 --> 00:18:30,886 Well, here we are. 362 00:18:30,910 --> 00:18:34,156 - yes, we certainly are. - aren't you coming in? 363 00:18:34,180 --> 00:18:36,892 Well, if you really want me to. 364 00:18:36,916 --> 00:18:38,928 Well, why wouldn't I? I'm Having a lovely evening. 365 00:18:38,952 --> 00:18:40,362 - you are? - yes. 366 00:18:40,386 --> 00:18:44,032 Oh, then, don't we... We, um... 367 00:18:44,056 --> 00:18:45,990 Why don't we what? 368 00:18:47,593 --> 00:18:50,906 We... Say good night. 369 00:18:50,930 --> 00:18:53,742 Andrew, no! Come on. 370 00:18:53,766 --> 00:18:55,777 Come and sit down for a while. 371 00:18:55,801 --> 00:18:58,213 What do you mean, "Go," it's very early yet. 372 00:18:58,237 --> 00:19:00,249 - sit. - well, thank you. 373 00:19:00,273 --> 00:19:02,284 Now, tell me what's wrong. 374 00:19:02,308 --> 00:19:04,887 - well, I... - I know, you're nervous, aren't you? 375 00:19:04,911 --> 00:19:06,956 Is it that obvious? 376 00:19:06,980 --> 00:19:10,125 Why shouldn't you be? You haven't Had a date in a very long time. 377 00:19:10,149 --> 00:19:12,031 So, why don't just Relax and do whatever 378 00:19:12,055 --> 00:19:14,151 Comes naturally and Everything will be fine. 379 00:19:15,321 --> 00:19:18,601 - you really mean that? - yes, of course I do. 380 00:19:18,625 --> 00:19:21,237 Well, I'm so glad You feel that way. 381 00:19:21,261 --> 00:19:23,239 Makes it a lot easier. 382 00:19:23,263 --> 00:19:25,274 Andrew! 383 00:19:25,298 --> 00:19:29,433 - stop it! - your lips my say "Stop," But your eyes say "Go." 384 00:19:31,137 --> 00:19:33,148 No, they don't! No, they don't! 385 00:19:33,172 --> 00:19:35,183 - yes... - no! Andrew! 386 00:19:35,207 --> 00:19:37,919 - hi! - oh, you're not finished With your date yet. 387 00:19:37,943 --> 00:19:41,790 - I'll come back. - no! No! Don't go. 388 00:19:41,814 --> 00:19:43,747 That's right, cindy. 389 00:19:46,185 --> 00:19:48,545 I'm the one who's going. 390 00:19:49,355 --> 00:19:51,332 Do you realize, I'm A middle-aged man, 391 00:19:51,356 --> 00:19:53,836 Vice-president of a bank With a grown daughter 392 00:19:53,860 --> 00:19:56,105 And here I am acting Like a complete nerf. 393 00:19:56,129 --> 00:19:58,473 - that's nerd. - thank you. 394 00:19:58,497 --> 00:20:00,508 Wait. 395 00:20:00,532 --> 00:20:03,145 Why did you do that? Why did you suddenly... 396 00:20:03,169 --> 00:20:07,449 Well, because these days, I thought That's what I was supposed to do on a date. 397 00:20:07,473 --> 00:20:09,484 I was wrong. 398 00:20:09,508 --> 00:20:10,986 I'm sorry I ruined your evening. 399 00:20:11,010 --> 00:20:13,922 No, you didn't ruin my... 400 00:20:13,946 --> 00:20:16,959 Look, you can't go yet, there's Still some champagne left 401 00:20:16,983 --> 00:20:20,596 And we can't let it go to waste. Everybody, sit down and let's have a drink. 402 00:20:20,620 --> 00:20:23,164 - are you sure you want me to? - yes, I am absolutely sure. 403 00:20:23,188 --> 00:20:26,501 - thank you. - I hope you don't mind, It looks a little bit flat. 404 00:20:26,525 --> 00:20:29,537 - here, cindy, That's for andrew. - great. 405 00:20:29,561 --> 00:20:31,306 - be careful, cindy. - what? 406 00:20:31,330 --> 00:20:33,642 - ah! - oh, I'm sorry! 407 00:20:33,666 --> 00:20:35,710 How can I make it up to you? 408 00:20:35,734 --> 00:20:38,169 - take your pants off. - janet! 409 00:20:41,641 --> 00:20:44,286 We have to get the Stain out before it sets. 410 00:20:44,310 --> 00:20:46,321 - oh. - oh. 411 00:20:46,345 --> 00:20:48,823 Andrew, you can change in My bedroom, it's right here. 412 00:20:48,847 --> 00:20:50,459 - all right. Yeah. - there you go. 413 00:20:50,483 --> 00:20:54,295 - I'm sorry. - oh, it got all Over the couch too! 414 00:20:54,319 --> 00:20:57,799 Well, go in the kitchen and get the Dish pan and put some cold water in it. 415 00:20:57,823 --> 00:20:59,601 - and see if we have A clean sponge. - okay. 416 00:20:59,625 --> 00:21:01,202 - janet? - yes? 417 00:21:01,226 --> 00:21:02,971 - here they are. - oh, thank you. 418 00:21:02,995 --> 00:21:05,440 - this isn't exactly The way I had it planned. - I know. 419 00:21:05,464 --> 00:21:07,147 You can wear one of Jack's robes. There's a 420 00:21:07,171 --> 00:21:08,877 Clean one in that Laundry basket on my bed. 421 00:21:08,901 --> 00:21:10,541 - oh, thank you. - uh-huh. 422 00:21:23,082 --> 00:21:25,016 Janet! 423 00:21:26,185 --> 00:21:28,530 Come on, janet, open Up. I want to apol... 424 00:21:28,554 --> 00:21:30,487 Well, hello again. 425 00:21:34,860 --> 00:21:36,871 You didn't... 426 00:21:36,895 --> 00:21:38,829 - well, you see jack... - you did! 427 00:21:40,966 --> 00:21:44,968 Oh, my god! And you couldn't Even wait to take off your shoes! 428 00:21:49,308 --> 00:21:51,753 Jack, you don't Understand. You see, janet... 429 00:21:51,777 --> 00:21:54,456 Is probably in there crying Her eyes out right now. 430 00:21:54,480 --> 00:21:56,858 What have I done! 431 00:21:56,882 --> 00:22:00,862 Look, I don't blame you. And I Don't blame janet, I blame myself. 432 00:22:00,886 --> 00:22:02,898 What have I done? 433 00:22:02,922 --> 00:22:08,003 If only I hadn't told you how easy It was to score with women today. 434 00:22:08,027 --> 00:22:13,541 How gullible they are, how easily They're fooled by the simplest come-ons. 435 00:22:13,565 --> 00:22:15,565 Poor, little, hopeless, Empty-headed janet. 436 00:22:18,971 --> 00:22:20,905 Janet. 437 00:22:23,342 --> 00:22:26,055 Don't stop, jack, I'm learning A lot from what you're saying. 438 00:22:26,079 --> 00:22:28,412 No, see, I was Just... I... I... I... 439 00:22:30,983 --> 00:22:33,295 Cindy is getting the champagne Stain out of your pants. 440 00:22:33,319 --> 00:22:35,330 - oh, thank you. - cham... Champagne. 441 00:22:35,354 --> 00:22:39,468 Oh, well, that's why... I Knew... I thought... I figured... 442 00:22:39,492 --> 00:22:42,171 - now, let me see If I got this straight. - ow! 443 00:22:42,195 --> 00:22:44,039 Women are very gullible. 444 00:22:44,063 --> 00:22:44,828 Well, no, see... 445 00:22:44,852 --> 00:22:47,042 And we can be fooled by The easiest of come-ons. 446 00:22:47,066 --> 00:22:49,178 - you're taking it out of context... - it's very easy to score... 447 00:22:49,202 --> 00:22:52,281 - with us empty-headed women. - well, no, no, I... 448 00:22:52,305 --> 00:22:54,083 Okay, buster, let me Tell you something, jack. 449 00:22:54,107 --> 00:22:56,618 I think I gotta go help cindy And she's in the kitchen with the... 450 00:22:56,642 --> 00:22:59,888 Whoa! 451 00:22:59,912 --> 00:23:01,924 A little sudsy water, there. 452 00:23:01,948 --> 00:23:03,881 - she missed me. - oh, too bad. 453 00:23:20,633 --> 00:23:25,147 - hello? - jack! The most wonderful Thing happened yesterday. 454 00:23:25,171 --> 00:23:28,917 - you're just gonna die When you find out about it! - that's great, what is it? 455 00:23:28,941 --> 00:23:33,822 - oh, I can't tell you. - why... Why not? 456 00:23:33,846 --> 00:23:37,859 Because I just told you all about It in the letter I just sent you. 457 00:23:37,883 --> 00:23:40,729 - so? - so, you'll be getting It in a day or so. 458 00:23:40,753 --> 00:23:42,997 If I tell ya now what Happened to me yesterday, 459 00:23:43,021 --> 00:23:44,633 What's the point of Waiting 'til tomorrow 460 00:23:44,657 --> 00:23:47,825 To find out what you Already know today? 461 00:23:50,930 --> 00:23:54,843 Hello! Jack, I think we Have a bad connection. 462 00:23:54,867 --> 00:23:57,912 You certainly do. 463 00:23:57,936 --> 00:24:00,482 Look, chrissy, if it's good News, why do I have to wait? 464 00:24:00,506 --> 00:24:04,519 - you've got me on the phone. - oh, you're right. 465 00:24:04,543 --> 00:24:06,354 You don't need The letter, do you? 466 00:24:06,378 --> 00:24:11,292 If I hurry, I can catch my dad Before he mails it. Bye, jack. 467 00:24:11,316 --> 00:24:14,395 Chrissy, hang on! Chrissy, wait! Wait! 468 00:24:14,419 --> 00:24:16,353 Chris! 469 00:24:41,247 --> 00:24:44,692 John ritter: three's company was Videotaped in front of a studio audience. 37313

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