All language subtitles for Threes Company S03E14 The Older Woman.DVDRip.NonHI.cc.en

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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:11,812 --> 00:00:13,490 ♪ come and knock on our door ♪ 2 00:00:13,514 --> 00:00:15,592 ♪ come and knock on our door ♪ 3 00:00:15,616 --> 00:00:17,594 ♪ we've been waiting for you ♪ 4 00:00:17,618 --> 00:00:19,262 ♪ we've been waiting for you ♪ 5 00:00:19,286 --> 00:00:21,898 ♪ where the kisses are Hers and hers and his ♪ 6 00:00:21,922 --> 00:00:24,167 ♪ three's company too ♪ 7 00:00:24,191 --> 00:00:26,169 ♪ come and dance on our floor ♪ 8 00:00:26,193 --> 00:00:28,171 ♪ come and dance on our floor ♪ 9 00:00:28,195 --> 00:00:31,008 - ♪ take a step that is new ♪ - ♪ take a step that is new ♪ 10 00:00:31,032 --> 00:00:34,111 ♪ we've a lovable space That needs your face ♪ 11 00:00:34,135 --> 00:00:37,014 ♪ three's company too ♪ 12 00:00:37,038 --> 00:00:39,883 ♪ you'll see that Life is a ball again ♪ 13 00:00:39,907 --> 00:00:43,320 ♪ laughter is calling for you ♪ 14 00:00:43,344 --> 00:00:46,423 - ♪ down at our rendezvous ♪ - ♪ down at our rendezvous ♪ 15 00:00:46,447 --> 00:00:49,113 ♪ three's company too ♪ 16 00:01:08,369 --> 00:01:11,414 ♪ down at our rendezvous ♪ 17 00:01:11,438 --> 00:01:13,171 ♪ three's company too. ♪ 18 00:01:15,275 --> 00:01:18,822 - I don't know, my dear. - I want to propose A toast now: 19 00:01:18,846 --> 00:01:21,991 To aunt martha's Happiness, to your wedding. 20 00:01:22,015 --> 00:01:26,596 - here's to you, mother. - oh thank you, you're all So sweet. 21 00:01:26,620 --> 00:01:29,532 Now, stanley, why don't You say a few nice words? 22 00:01:29,556 --> 00:01:31,801 Okay... Um... 23 00:01:31,825 --> 00:01:35,304 Here's to the wine And here's to the glass. 24 00:01:35,328 --> 00:01:38,162 - and here's to the lady with the... - stanley! 25 00:01:41,968 --> 00:01:44,035 - with a lot of class. - aunt martha: oh! 26 00:01:45,439 --> 00:01:47,617 Couldn't you have Just wished her luck? 27 00:01:47,641 --> 00:01:49,419 You're so right, helen. 28 00:01:49,443 --> 00:01:51,220 I've already buried Four husbands, 29 00:01:51,244 --> 00:01:53,122 So who could use More luck than I? 30 00:01:53,146 --> 00:01:55,313 Your next husband. 31 00:01:56,617 --> 00:01:58,127 Well then, let's drink to him! 32 00:01:58,151 --> 00:01:59,996 All: cheers! Here, here! 33 00:02:00,020 --> 00:02:03,099 Oh! I almost forgot. I was Supposed to check about my fitting. 34 00:02:03,123 --> 00:02:05,067 Oh I'll call the Dressmaker for you, mom. 35 00:02:05,091 --> 00:02:06,403 Ooh does anybody have a dime? 36 00:02:06,427 --> 00:02:08,337 - oh wait a minute. - let's see. 37 00:02:08,361 --> 00:02:10,929 I saw one here a minute ago. I don't know where it went. 38 00:02:12,733 --> 00:02:15,412 Stanley! 39 00:02:15,436 --> 00:02:16,746 - oh I'm sor... - women: oh! 40 00:02:16,770 --> 00:02:19,103 Thank you. 41 00:02:24,277 --> 00:02:26,477 I was saving it for a tip. 42 00:02:27,514 --> 00:02:31,127 Look, aunt martha, to get Back to your wedding dress. 43 00:02:31,151 --> 00:02:33,797 I think that 44 00:02:33,821 --> 00:02:37,066 To heck with convention, if you Want to wear white for your wedding, 45 00:02:37,090 --> 00:02:38,902 - you should wear white. - oh no. 46 00:02:38,926 --> 00:02:42,806 White is for a new bride. You know, pure, untouched. 47 00:02:42,830 --> 00:02:45,007 I don't think it would Be right for me. 48 00:02:45,031 --> 00:02:47,198 It'd be perfect for me. 49 00:02:49,035 --> 00:02:52,081 - man: hey, how are You doing, man? - oh hey! There's jack. 50 00:02:52,105 --> 00:02:53,983 Jack, could you come Over here a minute? 51 00:02:54,007 --> 00:02:56,118 - I want you To meet someone. - sure. Hi. 52 00:02:56,142 --> 00:02:58,955 Jack, this is my aunt Martha from seattle. 53 00:02:58,979 --> 00:03:01,357 This is jack tripper. He lives in our building. 54 00:03:01,381 --> 00:03:03,092 - oh! - nice to meet you. 55 00:03:03,116 --> 00:03:04,794 Mr. Roper, you must feel good 56 00:03:04,818 --> 00:03:06,830 Entertaining two Beautiful women. 57 00:03:08,355 --> 00:03:10,956 - why don't you join us? - and make it three? 58 00:03:13,193 --> 00:03:16,194 Mrs. Roper: why don't you Go get us some more wine? 59 00:03:23,470 --> 00:03:26,483 Jack, you must be lonely with The girls away for the weekend. 60 00:03:26,507 --> 00:03:28,217 Why don't you sit down? 61 00:03:28,241 --> 00:03:30,987 Thank you, but I have some friends Over there I haven't seen in a long time. 62 00:03:31,011 --> 00:03:32,154 Nice meeting you. Bye-bye. 63 00:03:32,178 --> 00:03:33,756 Both: oh! 64 00:03:33,780 --> 00:03:37,460 - I'm sorry. - oh this is my cousin Barbara, jack. 65 00:03:37,484 --> 00:03:39,762 This is jack tripper. 66 00:03:39,786 --> 00:03:41,831 - remember I told you About him? - oh yes! 67 00:03:41,855 --> 00:03:44,634 - you're the one who lives With the two girls. - that's me. 68 00:03:44,658 --> 00:03:47,537 I think they're very lucky to have A man around to do the cooking. 69 00:03:47,561 --> 00:03:50,139 Yeah, I'm also there For protection. 70 00:03:50,163 --> 00:03:52,430 Oh really, what Are you afraid of? 71 00:03:54,034 --> 00:03:56,012 Would you like to join us? 72 00:03:56,036 --> 00:03:57,636 - oh, I'd be happy to. - good. 73 00:03:58,772 --> 00:04:00,383 - what about your friends? - friends? 74 00:04:00,407 --> 00:04:02,218 Oh we're not that friendly. 75 00:04:02,242 --> 00:04:06,022 Oh mother, the dressmaker needs to See you right away for another fitting. 76 00:04:06,046 --> 00:04:08,725 Oh just when we were Having so much fun. 77 00:04:08,749 --> 00:04:10,459 I'll drive you There, aunt martha. 78 00:04:10,483 --> 00:04:12,529 All right, dear. Thank you. 79 00:04:12,553 --> 00:04:14,263 Where's everybody going? 80 00:04:14,287 --> 00:04:17,233 - we have to drive aunt martha To the dressmaker's. - yes. 81 00:04:17,257 --> 00:04:19,536 What about the wine? It's Very expensive, you know. 82 00:04:19,560 --> 00:04:23,973 Now be a big spender for Once, stanley. Leave it for them. 83 00:04:23,997 --> 00:04:26,843 Oh jack, I'm taking Everyone to dinner tonight. 84 00:04:26,867 --> 00:04:29,078 Since you're alone, Perhaps you'd like to join us. 85 00:04:29,102 --> 00:04:31,748 - oh I couldn't. - of course you could. 86 00:04:31,772 --> 00:04:33,271 Of course I could. 87 00:04:34,340 --> 00:04:36,118 Good. See ya later. 88 00:04:36,142 --> 00:04:37,620 - bye, mother. - bye-bye. 89 00:04:37,644 --> 00:04:40,745 Oh thank you very Much, mr. Roper. 90 00:04:43,249 --> 00:04:46,451 Joe... Give the check to him. 91 00:04:49,556 --> 00:04:50,596 Well... 92 00:04:52,459 --> 00:04:56,272 Very well, thank you. 93 00:04:56,296 --> 00:04:58,608 - what do you do, jack? - hmm? Mm... 94 00:04:58,632 --> 00:05:00,677 I'm studying to be a chef. 95 00:05:00,701 --> 00:05:02,478 Oh what a coincidence. 96 00:05:02,502 --> 00:05:04,714 - do you like to cook? - no, I like to eat. 97 00:05:04,738 --> 00:05:07,383 - oh... - would you cook For me sometime? 98 00:05:07,407 --> 00:05:09,741 Uh, I'd love to cook With you... For you. 99 00:05:11,277 --> 00:05:14,023 What about you, barbara? Tell Me what you... No, don't tell me. 100 00:05:14,047 --> 00:05:15,424 Let me guess. 101 00:05:15,448 --> 00:05:18,127 You are a former miss america? 102 00:05:18,151 --> 00:05:21,263 - no. - the present Miss america? 103 00:05:21,287 --> 00:05:23,132 - no... - no, I got it. You're a model. 104 00:05:23,156 --> 00:05:24,366 - close! - what? 105 00:05:24,390 --> 00:05:25,670 I'm an archaeologist. 106 00:05:28,194 --> 00:05:30,406 - no... - yes, why not? 107 00:05:30,430 --> 00:05:32,809 No, archaeologists Are old men with beards. 108 00:05:32,833 --> 00:05:34,911 Oh come on. Where Did you get that idea? 109 00:05:34,935 --> 00:05:38,147 "The mummy's tomb." I Saw that seven times. 110 00:05:38,171 --> 00:05:40,583 Also "The return of the Mummy," "The mummy's curse," 111 00:05:40,607 --> 00:05:42,451 And... Who could forget... "Mummy and pa kettle." 112 00:05:42,475 --> 00:05:43,686 I saw those from the beginning. 113 00:05:43,710 --> 00:05:45,554 Okay, okay, you got me. 114 00:05:45,578 --> 00:05:47,790 - I'll start growing A beard tomorrow. - oh no. 115 00:05:47,814 --> 00:05:49,759 - you're an archaeologist? - yeah. 116 00:05:49,783 --> 00:05:52,343 - are you digging Anything now? - yes, you. 117 00:05:53,887 --> 00:05:56,788 Oh god, thank you very much. 118 00:05:58,025 --> 00:05:59,624 Well, keep digging. 119 00:06:02,428 --> 00:06:05,828 Actually, I'm in the middle of A book about howard carter... 120 00:06:06,633 --> 00:06:08,945 The man who discovered King tut's tomb. 121 00:06:08,969 --> 00:06:12,214 Oh that howard cor... Oh Yeah, sure, howie. I know him. 122 00:06:12,238 --> 00:06:14,416 It must be a very Interesting book. 123 00:06:14,440 --> 00:06:17,920 Well, I don't know. I haven't Finished writing it yet. 124 00:06:17,944 --> 00:06:19,789 Write? No kidding, You're writing a book?! 125 00:06:19,813 --> 00:06:21,824 No kidding, I'm writing a book. 126 00:06:21,848 --> 00:06:25,628 - how long will You be in town? - for a few days. 127 00:06:25,652 --> 00:06:28,464 What a coincidence, so will I. 128 00:06:28,488 --> 00:06:32,301 Would you mind giving me a Crash course in archaeology? 129 00:06:32,325 --> 00:06:36,072 - well, I suppose we could Go to a couple of museums. - yeah. 130 00:06:36,096 --> 00:06:39,175 - too bad the tut exhibit Isn't still in town. - don't worry. 131 00:06:39,199 --> 00:06:42,645 I saw that. Yeah, I went in, Changed the bandages, and left. 132 00:06:42,669 --> 00:06:45,109 Boy that little kid must have Been in some accident. He was... 133 00:06:46,907 --> 00:06:49,118 - maybe the museum isn't Such a good idea. - I know. 134 00:06:49,142 --> 00:06:51,582 Tell me, what would You really like to do? 135 00:06:55,448 --> 00:06:58,460 Well... The weather's turned. Do you like surfing at all? 136 00:06:58,484 --> 00:06:59,696 - I love surfing! - do you? 137 00:06:59,720 --> 00:07:00,863 - yes! - oh great! 138 00:07:00,887 --> 00:07:02,765 Let's go down to the Beach and make some waves. 139 00:07:02,789 --> 00:07:05,690 All right, yes. 140 00:07:08,995 --> 00:07:10,039 Oh boy. 141 00:07:10,063 --> 00:07:12,542 Well, here we are, home again. 142 00:07:12,566 --> 00:07:14,677 I was hoping you Weren't gonna say that. 143 00:07:14,701 --> 00:07:17,647 - why? - because, chrissy, 144 00:07:17,671 --> 00:07:19,382 That's what Everybody always says. 145 00:07:19,406 --> 00:07:21,150 Do you know when we Used to take vacations? 146 00:07:21,174 --> 00:07:22,986 We'd come home, walk Through the door. 147 00:07:23,010 --> 00:07:25,488 My mother would always Say, "Here we are, home again." 148 00:07:25,512 --> 00:07:28,379 I didn't know your Mother used to live here. 149 00:07:30,150 --> 00:07:32,962 Chrissy, come on. I'm Talking about when I was a kid. 150 00:07:32,986 --> 00:07:36,621 - your mother lived here when you were... - chrissy! 151 00:07:38,024 --> 00:07:39,702 Oh larry, I'm glad you're here. 152 00:07:39,726 --> 00:07:41,871 - thanks for Bringing up the bags. - you're welcome. 153 00:07:41,895 --> 00:07:43,406 - chrissy, let me Ask you something. - hmm? 154 00:07:43,430 --> 00:07:45,575 How come your bag is Twice as heavy as janet's? 155 00:07:45,599 --> 00:07:47,832 'cause my bag is Smaller than hers. 156 00:07:50,704 --> 00:07:52,815 Should I ask? Why not? 157 00:07:52,839 --> 00:07:56,886 - what?! - because my bag Is smaller. 158 00:07:56,910 --> 00:07:59,889 I could barely fit all my clothes Into it and they all get wrinkled. 159 00:07:59,913 --> 00:08:03,226 It doesn't matter whether your Clothes get wrinkled or not, 160 00:08:03,250 --> 00:08:05,194 That wouldn't make Your bag any heavier. 161 00:08:05,218 --> 00:08:09,398 Of course, it matters because If my clothes didn't get wrinkled, 162 00:08:09,422 --> 00:08:12,101 - I wouldn't have To carry this iron. - oh. 163 00:08:12,125 --> 00:08:14,025 - I see. - janet: you asked. 164 00:08:16,964 --> 00:08:19,476 Chrissy, you came Home just in time. 165 00:08:19,500 --> 00:08:22,078 You wanna go with me To the hollywood bowl? 166 00:08:22,102 --> 00:08:24,581 Oh I'm sorry, larry. I make it a rule 167 00:08:24,605 --> 00:08:27,149 Never to date anyone who Lives in the same building. 168 00:08:27,173 --> 00:08:29,786 Hey, come on. Rules Are made to be broken. 169 00:08:29,810 --> 00:08:32,789 And so are arms. 170 00:08:32,813 --> 00:08:35,257 Hey, if it isn't my Long-lost roommates! 171 00:08:35,281 --> 00:08:36,961 - good to see you, chrissy! - hi, jack! 172 00:08:38,118 --> 00:08:40,529 And janet, oh you need a shave. 173 00:08:40,553 --> 00:08:44,366 - she's changed! - gee, you're In a good mood. 174 00:08:44,390 --> 00:08:46,535 - oh I am, I really... - jack! 175 00:08:46,559 --> 00:08:48,805 - there she is, Little janet! - hi, hi, hi! 176 00:08:48,829 --> 00:08:50,006 - how are you? - I'm okay. 177 00:08:50,030 --> 00:08:51,273 - I feel terrific. - good! 178 00:08:51,297 --> 00:08:53,009 Things could be Better. Listen... 179 00:08:53,033 --> 00:08:56,979 - I met this Fantastic woman! - larry: oh. 180 00:08:57,003 --> 00:08:59,682 - she's really different. - oh boy. 181 00:08:59,706 --> 00:09:03,019 That's the same thing you say Every time you meet a new girl. 182 00:09:03,043 --> 00:09:04,353 Ah, but this time it's true. 183 00:09:04,377 --> 00:09:06,155 And to begin with, She's not a girl. 184 00:09:06,179 --> 00:09:08,312 She's a woman. 185 00:09:09,950 --> 00:09:12,161 - a woman? - she's all woman. 186 00:09:12,185 --> 00:09:14,763 Oh chrissy, she's beautiful. 187 00:09:14,787 --> 00:09:18,301 She's witty. She's intelligent, And she's an archaeologist. 188 00:09:18,325 --> 00:09:20,369 - an archaeologist, yeah? - yeah. 189 00:09:20,393 --> 00:09:22,693 Where'd you dig her up? 190 00:09:25,565 --> 00:09:28,211 What are you gonna Do, jump on her bones? 191 00:09:31,504 --> 00:09:34,083 No, she spent 10 years in egypt, 192 00:09:34,107 --> 00:09:35,785 And she's writing a book on it. 193 00:09:35,809 --> 00:09:37,787 She's an authority On ancient peoples. 194 00:09:37,811 --> 00:09:40,572 Oh that's nice. She Works with senior citizens. 195 00:09:42,115 --> 00:09:43,626 Wait, hold on a second, jack. 196 00:09:43,650 --> 00:09:46,529 Just how old is this woman? 197 00:09:46,553 --> 00:09:48,932 - I don't know. - 30? 198 00:09:48,956 --> 00:09:50,266 - come on, larry. - 35? 199 00:09:50,290 --> 00:09:51,500 - 40? - would you get off... 200 00:09:51,524 --> 00:09:52,602 What, am I getting warm? 201 00:09:52,626 --> 00:09:54,303 So she's older than I am. 202 00:09:54,327 --> 00:09:55,805 - so what? - yeah, that's right. 203 00:09:55,829 --> 00:09:57,706 - what difference Does age make? - yeah, larry, 204 00:09:57,730 --> 00:10:00,777 If jack likes her and she likes Him, that's all that matters. 205 00:10:00,801 --> 00:10:03,279 I guess if you can't cut It with our generation, 206 00:10:03,303 --> 00:10:06,182 Maybe an older woman Does make sense. Take it easy. 207 00:10:06,206 --> 00:10:08,084 ♪ just a gigolo. ♪ 208 00:10:08,108 --> 00:10:09,718 Oh, larry! 209 00:10:09,742 --> 00:10:11,353 Just hold it right there. 210 00:10:11,377 --> 00:10:14,023 Now tell me, what have you Got against older women? 211 00:10:14,047 --> 00:10:15,892 Nothing. My mother's An older woman, 212 00:10:15,916 --> 00:10:17,660 But I wouldn't want to date her. 213 00:10:17,684 --> 00:10:20,597 Here we go, guys. The old Double standard once again. 214 00:10:20,621 --> 00:10:23,199 I suppose you think it's just Terrible for an older woman, 215 00:10:23,223 --> 00:10:26,069 - but I bet you think It's okay for an old man. - no, 216 00:10:26,093 --> 00:10:28,653 I wouldn't date An old man either. 217 00:10:29,095 --> 00:10:31,740 - larry... - he is such a hypocrite! 218 00:10:31,764 --> 00:10:35,044 Oh forget him, jack. Just forget All about him and tell us about her. 219 00:10:35,068 --> 00:10:36,778 - yeah. - now, how'd you meet her? 220 00:10:36,802 --> 00:10:40,249 - she's a relative Of the ropers. - you're kidding. 221 00:10:40,273 --> 00:10:42,251 - no... - come on, jack, does roper know? 222 00:10:42,275 --> 00:10:46,444 Janet, don't be silly. Of course Mr. Roper knows his own relatives. 223 00:10:47,648 --> 00:10:50,727 - chrissy! - oh look at the time. 224 00:10:50,751 --> 00:10:52,228 I'm late. I gotta run. 225 00:10:52,252 --> 00:10:54,563 I'll just get... I Gotta take a shower. 226 00:10:54,587 --> 00:10:56,833 Okay, jack, but listen, Whatever happens, 227 00:10:56,857 --> 00:10:59,102 - chrissy and I, we're With you all the way. - yeah. 228 00:10:59,126 --> 00:11:02,304 Oh great, should we all Get undressed together? 229 00:11:02,328 --> 00:11:04,129 Get in there! 230 00:11:05,465 --> 00:11:06,943 I don't believe him. 231 00:11:06,967 --> 00:11:09,612 Boy, do you think Jack's serious? 232 00:11:09,636 --> 00:11:11,180 Oh chrissy, who knows? 233 00:11:11,204 --> 00:11:14,050 He's never dated a girl Who's written a book. 234 00:11:14,074 --> 00:11:16,634 Chrissy, he's never dated A girl who's read a book. 235 00:11:17,778 --> 00:11:19,458 I'll get it. 236 00:11:20,180 --> 00:11:22,458 Listen, I only know one thing: 237 00:11:22,482 --> 00:11:25,962 If two people care about each Other, then age doesn't matter. 238 00:11:25,986 --> 00:11:28,086 - oh hello. - hi. 239 00:11:35,161 --> 00:11:37,828 - is jack home? - oh yes, he's in... 240 00:11:44,371 --> 00:11:46,971 He... He... 241 00:11:49,276 --> 00:11:52,321 - he's taking a shower. - oh. 242 00:11:52,345 --> 00:11:56,158 Well, he left his swimming Trunks downstairs. 243 00:11:56,182 --> 00:11:58,928 Oh I'm sorry. You Don't know who I am. 244 00:11:58,952 --> 00:12:01,898 - I'm mrs. Roper's aunt. - her aunt? 245 00:12:01,922 --> 00:12:05,301 - and you must be janet. - janet, yeah. 246 00:12:05,325 --> 00:12:08,504 And you're chrissy. Oh jack Has told me all about you. 247 00:12:08,528 --> 00:12:11,507 He's told us all about you too. 248 00:12:11,531 --> 00:12:14,810 Oh he did? Well, he's Such a wonderful boy. 249 00:12:14,834 --> 00:12:18,347 At dinner the other evening, I Found him completely irresistible. 250 00:12:18,371 --> 00:12:20,582 - you did? - yes, 251 00:12:20,606 --> 00:12:23,406 You know, in a way, he Reminds me of my first husband. 252 00:12:26,779 --> 00:12:28,157 Your first husband? 253 00:12:28,181 --> 00:12:31,527 Yes, and also my third. 254 00:12:31,551 --> 00:12:33,295 And also my third. 255 00:12:33,319 --> 00:12:35,998 I-I... 256 00:12:36,022 --> 00:12:38,835 I suppose that jack knows All about these husbands? 257 00:12:38,859 --> 00:12:40,636 Oh yes, he kidded me about it. 258 00:12:40,660 --> 00:12:44,106 - he did? - oh yes, he's Such a tease. 259 00:12:44,130 --> 00:12:47,243 That's what I like about him... He makes me feel so young. 260 00:12:47,267 --> 00:12:49,868 Who wouldn't? 261 00:12:54,240 --> 00:12:56,685 Oh nothing... She mumbles. 262 00:12:56,709 --> 00:12:59,155 Oh... I see, I've got to run. 263 00:12:59,179 --> 00:13:03,013 There's so many things to do When you're getting married. 264 00:13:07,387 --> 00:13:08,652 Bye! 265 00:13:24,437 --> 00:13:25,569 Married? 266 00:13:26,706 --> 00:13:30,119 Chrissy, did that Woman say married? 267 00:13:30,143 --> 00:13:33,022 Is jack gonna marry her? 268 00:13:33,046 --> 00:13:35,947 Well, he did say She was different. 269 00:13:38,051 --> 00:13:41,030 This is terrible, chrissy! How could this happen? 270 00:13:41,054 --> 00:13:43,822 Well, maybe she Lied about her age. 271 00:13:45,992 --> 00:13:49,105 Come on, chrissy. There's Gotta be 40 years between them! 272 00:13:49,129 --> 00:13:51,073 Jack's just a kid. He's a baby. 273 00:13:51,097 --> 00:13:54,911 Well, you know what you said Before, "Age isn't important." 274 00:13:54,935 --> 00:13:58,169 Please, I was talking About age... Not old age! 275 00:13:59,272 --> 00:14:01,583 Oh boy, do I feel terrific. 276 00:14:01,607 --> 00:14:04,386 It's amazing what a shower could Do. It makes you feel years younger. 277 00:14:04,410 --> 00:14:08,057 I wouldn't take too Many of them, jack. 278 00:14:08,081 --> 00:14:09,280 What? 279 00:14:12,018 --> 00:14:14,930 - ahem, jack... - yeah? 280 00:14:14,954 --> 00:14:19,068 Your new girlfriend Was just here. 281 00:14:19,092 --> 00:14:20,536 - she was here? - she was here. 282 00:14:20,560 --> 00:14:22,938 What did I tell you? Isn't she something else? 283 00:14:22,962 --> 00:14:25,408 She's something else, all right. 284 00:14:25,432 --> 00:14:28,544 I guess it's pretty easy to see Why I was attracted to her, huh? 285 00:14:28,568 --> 00:14:30,146 Well, I... 286 00:14:30,170 --> 00:14:32,581 She brought back Your bathing trunks. 287 00:14:32,605 --> 00:14:35,506 Oh yeah, we went Surfing all weekend. 288 00:14:40,213 --> 00:14:42,391 Surfing? 289 00:14:42,415 --> 00:14:46,162 - you went surfing with her? - oh yeah, she's in Terrific shape, 290 00:14:46,186 --> 00:14:47,785 And I don't just Mean in a bikini. 291 00:14:50,623 --> 00:14:52,768 Boy, you should have seen The people on the beach. 292 00:14:52,792 --> 00:14:54,670 She sure made some heads turn. 293 00:14:54,694 --> 00:14:56,638 I can imagine. 294 00:14:56,662 --> 00:15:00,376 Hey girls, don't Get the wrong idea. 295 00:15:00,400 --> 00:15:03,546 I mean, our relationship is Not exactly what it seems like. 296 00:15:03,570 --> 00:15:06,337 - it isn't? - no, it's not all sex. 297 00:15:08,408 --> 00:15:10,486 Girls, I got a couple Of errands to run, 298 00:15:10,510 --> 00:15:12,521 Then I'm meeting her at The regal beagle at 6:30. 299 00:15:12,545 --> 00:15:14,190 Talk to you later, Bye-bye... Oh... 300 00:15:14,214 --> 00:15:16,292 Oh hi, jack. Listen, I'm glad I caught you. 301 00:15:16,316 --> 00:15:20,128 Look, I was thinking about what The girls were saying before, 302 00:15:20,152 --> 00:15:23,465 And they're right. Age doesn't matter 303 00:15:23,489 --> 00:15:25,534 As long as you two Really dig each other. 304 00:15:25,558 --> 00:15:27,670 - oh larry, thank you. - okay. 305 00:15:27,694 --> 00:15:29,909 I really appreciate This. I gotta run. I'm late. 306 00:15:29,933 --> 00:15:30,933 Catch ya later. 307 00:15:32,565 --> 00:15:33,976 Was that okay? Am I forgiven? 308 00:15:34,000 --> 00:15:36,145 - are you nuts? - are you out of your mind? 309 00:15:36,169 --> 00:15:38,881 Whoa, whoa, hang on a Second. I'm on your side. 310 00:15:38,905 --> 00:15:41,950 - larry, we have just met Jack's new girlfriend. - yeah? 311 00:15:41,974 --> 00:15:44,020 - remember jack said She was older? - yeah. 312 00:15:44,044 --> 00:15:46,622 Well, she's a lot Older than that. 313 00:15:46,646 --> 00:15:47,856 - really? - really. 314 00:15:47,880 --> 00:15:49,691 - really. - wow. 315 00:15:49,715 --> 00:15:53,429 Maybe she's the type of woman Who gets turned on by young guys. 316 00:15:53,453 --> 00:15:55,498 - you think so? - yeah. 317 00:15:55,522 --> 00:15:59,034 Ooh, ooh larry, 318 00:15:59,058 --> 00:16:01,036 Well, if that's true, 319 00:16:01,060 --> 00:16:04,473 Then all we have to do is Find a young guy to turn her on 320 00:16:04,497 --> 00:16:06,908 And jack could see her for The kind of woman she really is. 321 00:16:06,932 --> 00:16:08,978 - yeah. - great. 322 00:16:09,002 --> 00:16:10,512 Where are you going To find a young guy who's 323 00:16:10,536 --> 00:16:14,005 Good-looking, Charming, sophisticated... 324 00:16:15,475 --> 00:16:17,075 And a lot of laughs? 325 00:16:19,812 --> 00:16:21,011 Okay, I'll do it. 326 00:16:24,684 --> 00:16:26,328 Okay, larry, all Right, you're on. 327 00:16:26,352 --> 00:16:27,796 Chrissy, it'll be okay. 328 00:16:27,820 --> 00:16:29,831 Go down to the ropers And get that woman up here. 329 00:16:29,855 --> 00:16:33,491 Yeah and then, you just leave Everything to "Larry love-lips." 330 00:16:41,301 --> 00:16:44,213 Oh boy, larry. This Is so nice of you. 331 00:16:44,237 --> 00:16:46,248 - hey, I'm a friend, Remember? - yeah. 332 00:16:46,272 --> 00:16:48,217 And I'm doing this for jack. 333 00:16:48,241 --> 00:16:50,274 - she's here! - oh. 334 00:16:52,745 --> 00:16:54,022 - larry? - yeah? 335 00:16:54,046 --> 00:16:56,092 Go get her! 336 00:17:02,255 --> 00:17:04,589 ♪ just a gigolo... ♪ 337 00:17:12,098 --> 00:17:13,698 I... Uh... 338 00:17:15,835 --> 00:17:16,867 Excuse me. 339 00:17:18,304 --> 00:17:20,216 Larry, what are you Doing back in here? 340 00:17:20,240 --> 00:17:22,284 I just didn't want to leave Without saying good bye. 341 00:17:22,308 --> 00:17:24,987 Wait a minute. You can't quit now! 342 00:17:25,011 --> 00:17:26,788 Watch me. 343 00:17:26,812 --> 00:17:29,625 - larry! - okay, it's off For tomorrow night! 344 00:17:29,649 --> 00:17:31,160 What's off? 345 00:17:31,184 --> 00:17:32,995 Chrissy here, she Decided she was 346 00:17:33,019 --> 00:17:34,730 Gonna go out with you anyway. 347 00:17:34,754 --> 00:17:36,932 - you did? - I did? 348 00:17:36,956 --> 00:17:40,136 Chrissy, you kidder. 349 00:17:40,160 --> 00:17:43,071 Oh yeah... Of course, now See, it's all different, though. 350 00:17:43,095 --> 00:17:44,972 It's off because Chrissy's not about to go 351 00:17:44,996 --> 00:17:46,942 Out with a guy who Deserts his best friend. 352 00:17:46,966 --> 00:17:51,079 Well, maybe I was A little bit hasty. 353 00:17:51,103 --> 00:17:52,914 Yeah, larry, you were Just a little bit hasty. 354 00:17:52,938 --> 00:17:55,005 - all right. - there you go. 355 00:18:02,148 --> 00:18:03,281 Hi. 356 00:18:04,684 --> 00:18:05,816 Hi. 357 00:18:09,556 --> 00:18:11,467 I'm larry. 358 00:18:11,491 --> 00:18:13,569 Oh well, how do you do? 359 00:18:13,593 --> 00:18:15,804 - I'm martha. - martha, 360 00:18:15,828 --> 00:18:17,606 What a beautiful name. 361 00:18:17,630 --> 00:18:19,363 Reminds one of vineyards. 362 00:18:22,335 --> 00:18:24,580 - a little wine? - yes, thank you. 363 00:18:24,604 --> 00:18:28,584 Excuse me, but I just couldn't Help but notice your perfume. 364 00:18:28,608 --> 00:18:31,853 It's so mysterious, So enchanting... 365 00:18:31,877 --> 00:18:34,990 So sensual... 366 00:18:35,014 --> 00:18:37,448 - what do you call it? - bengay. 367 00:18:45,925 --> 00:18:49,338 You know, I rub it On my shoulders. 368 00:18:49,362 --> 00:18:53,942 - right. - it's the only thing that Works for my rheumatism. 369 00:18:53,966 --> 00:18:59,370 Well, it's so... You. 370 00:19:01,307 --> 00:19:03,107 - your health. - oh thank you. 371 00:19:10,316 --> 00:19:11,316 Um... 372 00:19:14,053 --> 00:19:16,832 I understood that Janet wanted to see me. 373 00:19:16,856 --> 00:19:18,667 Janet. Ha ha. 374 00:19:18,691 --> 00:19:22,091 Yeah, she's a nice little Girl for someone her age. 375 00:19:23,663 --> 00:19:26,842 Young man, just exactly What is it you're doing? 376 00:19:26,866 --> 00:19:28,866 Now why fight it, martha? 377 00:19:30,035 --> 00:19:31,747 I knew from the Minute I set eyes on you, 378 00:19:31,771 --> 00:19:34,171 - there was something Between us. - oh, oh... 379 00:19:39,846 --> 00:19:42,223 Heavens to betsy! 380 00:19:42,247 --> 00:19:43,792 Come on, we're gonna Be late for dinner. 381 00:19:43,816 --> 00:19:45,727 How could you talk about Dinner at a time like this? 382 00:19:45,751 --> 00:19:48,229 - why, what's the matter? - what's the matter?! 383 00:19:48,253 --> 00:19:51,154 How would you like it if some Young man tried to seduce you? 384 00:19:59,765 --> 00:20:01,677 Someone tried to seduce you? 385 00:20:01,701 --> 00:20:04,279 I hope you got his Name and number. 386 00:20:04,303 --> 00:20:08,717 It's this! This is the Object I'm talking about! 387 00:20:08,741 --> 00:20:12,153 - he tried to seduce me! - larry?! 388 00:20:12,177 --> 00:20:14,823 I'm sorry. It was all a mistake. 389 00:20:14,847 --> 00:20:16,859 - you gotta believe me. - let me out of here. 390 00:20:16,883 --> 00:20:19,049 No, no, you don't Understand what... 391 00:20:25,290 --> 00:20:26,724 You're weird! 392 00:20:32,264 --> 00:20:34,075 - oh boy, larry! - oh thanks! 393 00:20:34,099 --> 00:20:35,711 Thanks for coming to the rescue! 394 00:20:35,735 --> 00:20:37,679 What did you expect us to do? 395 00:20:37,703 --> 00:20:39,447 - you could have... - larry, come on! 396 00:20:39,471 --> 00:20:41,650 Okay, larry, I'm sorry. 397 00:20:41,674 --> 00:20:43,886 Sorry? Don't you have Anything else to say? 398 00:20:43,910 --> 00:20:45,053 - yes. - what? 399 00:20:45,077 --> 00:20:46,243 Our date's off. 400 00:20:54,754 --> 00:20:57,399 Thank you for a lovely Weekend. It's been fun. 401 00:20:57,423 --> 00:20:59,501 - do you have To leave tomorrow? - yes. 402 00:20:59,525 --> 00:21:01,069 Right after my mother's wedding, 403 00:21:01,093 --> 00:21:02,504 It's back to Seattle and my book. 404 00:21:02,528 --> 00:21:05,273 One of these days when You in the nobel prize... 405 00:21:05,297 --> 00:21:08,877 They don't give a nobel Prize for archaeology. 406 00:21:08,901 --> 00:21:11,212 No, I'm talking about surfing. 407 00:21:12,772 --> 00:21:16,206 - oh I've really Enjoyed it. - me too. 408 00:21:17,643 --> 00:21:19,621 Janet: chrissy, chrissy, please! 409 00:21:19,645 --> 00:21:22,791 Wait a minute. Are you sure We're doing the right thing? 410 00:21:22,815 --> 00:21:26,662 Yes, we are going to find out Why he's marrying that woman, 411 00:21:26,686 --> 00:21:28,630 And why he's Keeping it a secret. 412 00:21:28,654 --> 00:21:30,214 - and... - who that is! 413 00:21:36,228 --> 00:21:37,668 - jack! - hi! 414 00:21:40,633 --> 00:21:43,078 Oh these are the girls. These are my roommates. 415 00:21:43,102 --> 00:21:45,881 - oh... - you know... We know everything! 416 00:21:45,905 --> 00:21:48,483 Jack, could we please Speak to you in private? 417 00:21:48,507 --> 00:21:50,619 Well, sure. Excuse me, barbara. 418 00:21:50,643 --> 00:21:53,689 - try not to miss me too much. - it'll be a problem. 419 00:21:53,713 --> 00:21:56,258 You know, if you knew What jack is going to do, 420 00:21:56,282 --> 00:21:58,162 You wouldn't be Doing what you just did. 421 00:22:02,121 --> 00:22:04,066 - all right, What's up, ladies? - jack, come on. 422 00:22:04,090 --> 00:22:07,235 Think of what you're doing. You're getting married tomorrow. 423 00:22:07,259 --> 00:22:08,637 I am? 424 00:22:08,661 --> 00:22:10,494 Don't act dumb! 425 00:22:12,364 --> 00:22:13,942 I'm not acting dumb! 426 00:22:13,966 --> 00:22:17,467 I oughta know when Somebody's acting dumb. 427 00:22:18,938 --> 00:22:21,316 Look, ladies, I am not Getting married tomorrow, 428 00:22:21,340 --> 00:22:22,584 But I do have a date tonight. 429 00:22:22,608 --> 00:22:24,519 Thank you very Much and good bye. 430 00:22:24,543 --> 00:22:27,723 Jack, we are not quitting till We get to the bottom of this! 431 00:22:27,747 --> 00:22:29,357 Excuse me, what Is this all about? 432 00:22:29,381 --> 00:22:31,526 For some reason, they Think I'm getting married. 433 00:22:31,550 --> 00:22:33,461 - really? You never Told me. - I know. 434 00:22:33,485 --> 00:22:36,131 I'm surprised he even Told his bride martha. 435 00:22:36,155 --> 00:22:39,367 - martha? - that's our landlady's Poor old aunt. 436 00:22:39,391 --> 00:22:42,325 That's my mother! 437 00:22:45,330 --> 00:22:48,143 - your mother? - shame on you, jack! 438 00:22:48,167 --> 00:22:50,634 You were just kissing Your stepdaughter! 439 00:22:52,571 --> 00:22:55,751 Wait, wait, my mother is Getting married tomorrow, 440 00:22:55,775 --> 00:22:57,385 But not to jack. 441 00:22:57,409 --> 00:23:01,489 You mean, she's Double-crossing him! 442 00:23:01,513 --> 00:23:04,626 - you still don't understand. Barbara... - I think I can make this clear. 443 00:23:04,650 --> 00:23:07,562 No, I think maybe I should Take care of this one. 444 00:23:07,586 --> 00:23:10,231 Chrissy, you see What happened was... 445 00:23:10,255 --> 00:23:14,269 What happened was we thought Barbara's mother was barbara. 446 00:23:14,293 --> 00:23:16,137 - yeah... - I think She's got it. 447 00:23:16,161 --> 00:23:20,230 Of course, I got it. I don't have to have Every teeny little thing explained to me. 448 00:23:22,501 --> 00:23:25,914 - barbara, I hope your mother Has a very nice wedding. - oh thank you. 449 00:23:25,938 --> 00:23:29,458 But after she's married, I don't think She ought to go surfing with jack anymore. 450 00:23:38,150 --> 00:23:39,928 You didn't have to laugh 451 00:23:39,952 --> 00:23:43,632 When the minister told The groom to kiss the bride. 452 00:23:43,656 --> 00:23:47,168 I only laughed when he had to Point the groom in the right direction. 453 00:23:48,894 --> 00:23:52,373 Well, I'd like to Propose another toast: 454 00:23:52,397 --> 00:23:54,710 To aunt martha's happiness. 455 00:23:54,734 --> 00:23:57,412 That poor woman Has had a lot of grief. 456 00:23:57,436 --> 00:23:59,870 No wonder, she's had A lot of marriages. 457 00:24:01,273 --> 00:24:04,352 You could at least Have a little sympathy. 458 00:24:04,376 --> 00:24:06,989 It hasn't been easy For her, you know? 459 00:24:07,013 --> 00:24:08,690 I know, I know. 460 00:24:08,714 --> 00:24:11,226 I mean, how would you like To have four dead husbands? 461 00:24:11,250 --> 00:24:14,151 I'd settle for one live one. 462 00:24:18,257 --> 00:24:20,168 What are you talking About? I'm not dead. 463 00:24:20,192 --> 00:24:24,305 You're just not buried, stanley. 464 00:24:50,355 --> 00:24:52,467 Ritter's voice: three's Company was videotaped 465 00:24:52,491 --> 00:24:54,371 in front of a studio audience. 36224

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