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♪ come and knock on our door ♪
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00:00:13,547 --> 00:00:15,625
♪ come and knock on our door ♪
3
00:00:15,649 --> 00:00:17,627
♪ we've been waiting for you ♪
4
00:00:17,651 --> 00:00:19,296
♪ we've been waiting for you ♪
5
00:00:19,320 --> 00:00:21,931
♪ where the kisses are
Hers and hers and his ♪
6
00:00:21,955 --> 00:00:24,201
♪ three's company too ♪
7
00:00:24,225 --> 00:00:26,203
♪ come and dance on our floor ♪
8
00:00:26,227 --> 00:00:28,205
♪ come and dance on our floor ♪
9
00:00:28,229 --> 00:00:31,041
- ♪ take a step that is new ♪
- ♪ take a step that is new ♪
10
00:00:31,065 --> 00:00:34,144
♪ we've a lovable space
That needs your face ♪
11
00:00:34,168 --> 00:00:37,047
♪ three's company too ♪
12
00:00:37,071 --> 00:00:39,916
♪ you'll see that
Life is a ball again ♪
13
00:00:39,940 --> 00:00:43,353
♪ laughter is calling for you ♪
14
00:00:43,377 --> 00:00:46,456
- ♪ down at our rendezvous ♪
- ♪ down at our rendezvous ♪
15
00:00:46,480 --> 00:00:49,148
♪ three's company too ♪
16
00:01:08,402 --> 00:01:11,481
♪ down at our rendezvous ♪
17
00:01:11,505 --> 00:01:13,204
♪ three's company too. ♪
18
00:01:18,479 --> 00:01:21,825
Okay, chrissy, we have everything
That we need. Now what do we do next?
19
00:01:21,849 --> 00:01:25,495
Place tom turkey in a
Shallow roasting pan.
20
00:01:25,519 --> 00:01:28,164
Right. Here.
21
00:01:28,188 --> 00:01:30,922
- okay.
- here you go, tom.
22
00:01:32,292 --> 00:01:34,270
There, you old guy.
23
00:01:34,294 --> 00:01:36,573
- hi, what are
You girls doing?
- hi, jack.
24
00:01:36,597 --> 00:01:38,575
We decided that it
Was just about time
25
00:01:38,599 --> 00:01:40,577
We cooked dinner
For you for a change.
26
00:01:40,601 --> 00:01:43,312
That should be interesting.
What are you making?
27
00:01:43,336 --> 00:01:45,882
- roast turkey.
- I'm just rubbing
The lemon on it.
28
00:01:45,906 --> 00:01:48,485
Chrissy. Chrissy, excuse me.
29
00:01:48,509 --> 00:01:51,109
You have to cut the lemon first.
30
00:01:52,212 --> 00:01:54,156
This is called "A
Knife," you see?
31
00:01:54,180 --> 00:01:56,125
And you put it on top
And you push down...
32
00:01:56,149 --> 00:01:58,094
That is called
"Cutting the lemon."
33
00:01:58,118 --> 00:02:00,663
Then you always rub
The lemon on the turkey
34
00:02:00,687 --> 00:02:02,665
In the direction
The feathers grow.
35
00:02:02,689 --> 00:02:05,435
Never rub against the grain.
Always do it this way. Got it?
36
00:02:05,459 --> 00:02:07,236
- let me see.
- go ahead.
37
00:02:07,260 --> 00:02:09,238
- thank you. Like this? - yeah.
38
00:02:09,262 --> 00:02:12,241
Hey, all right. Chrissy, wanna
Sprinkle on the garlic powder?
39
00:02:12,265 --> 00:02:15,111
You don't use garlic powder!
40
00:02:15,135 --> 00:02:17,113
Let me see. This is sage, right.
41
00:02:17,137 --> 00:02:19,115
You put the sage on first
42
00:02:19,139 --> 00:02:21,651
And you have to work
It in ever so gently.
43
00:02:21,675 --> 00:02:23,653
Like that, you see?
44
00:02:23,677 --> 00:02:26,956
And then you put the butter
On to make the skin real crisp...
45
00:02:26,980 --> 00:02:29,581
Never... Never bruise the skin.
46
00:02:32,686 --> 00:02:35,732
Listen, I really want
To thank both of you
47
00:02:35,756 --> 00:02:37,734
For cooking dinner
For me like this.
48
00:02:37,758 --> 00:02:40,203
Oh, jack, it was
No trouble at all.
49
00:02:40,227 --> 00:02:42,339
Thanks. Don't get up.
50
00:02:46,567 --> 00:02:48,445
- oh, hi. Come on in.
- hi, chrissy, hi.
51
00:02:48,469 --> 00:02:51,748
Janet, listen, stanley
And I were wondering
52
00:02:51,772 --> 00:02:53,783
If you could do us a favor.
53
00:02:53,807 --> 00:02:56,853
- sure, what is it?
- this friend of mine
Just got married,
54
00:02:56,877 --> 00:02:58,855
And she left her
Little girl with us
55
00:02:58,879 --> 00:03:00,857
While she went on her honeymoon.
56
00:03:00,881 --> 00:03:04,794
- uh-huh?
- oh, this is
Her second marriage.
57
00:03:04,818 --> 00:03:08,665
- anyway, this little girl...
- all she does is mope around the house.
58
00:03:08,689 --> 00:03:10,700
And she... She is just so upset
59
00:03:10,724 --> 00:03:12,736
About her mother
Getting remarried.
60
00:03:12,760 --> 00:03:17,106
She's the sweetest
Little girl, but so sad.
61
00:03:17,130 --> 00:03:19,843
We've done everything to
Try to cheer her up, but...
62
00:03:19,867 --> 00:03:21,800
I even played my bugle.
63
00:03:23,970 --> 00:03:26,916
So, anyway, I thought that
You girls, being younger,
64
00:03:26,940 --> 00:03:29,018
Would... Have better luck.
65
00:03:29,042 --> 00:03:31,354
- well, we're happy
To help, mrs. Roper.
- sure.
66
00:03:31,378 --> 00:03:33,456
Oh, good, good.
Poor little thing,
67
00:03:33,480 --> 00:03:36,593
She's just sitting out there
On the steps, so depressed.
68
00:03:36,617 --> 00:03:38,961
Yeah, no enthusiasm,
No energy, no interest...
69
00:03:38,985 --> 00:03:41,330
I've never seen
Anything like it.
70
00:03:41,354 --> 00:03:44,954
Do you ever see yourself
Walk into the bedroom?
71
00:03:47,694 --> 00:03:50,940
Laurie. Laurie,
Come on in, honey.
72
00:03:50,964 --> 00:03:53,309
I want you to meet
Some friends of mine.
73
00:03:53,333 --> 00:03:55,745
- this is chrissy.
- hi, laurie.
74
00:03:55,769 --> 00:03:57,647
- hi.
- and this is janet.
75
00:03:57,671 --> 00:03:59,749
- how do you do?
- hi.
76
00:03:59,773 --> 00:04:02,819
Now, why don't you just
Stay and visit for a while
77
00:04:02,843 --> 00:04:05,889
And then this afternoon
78
00:04:05,913 --> 00:04:08,892
Uncle stanley can
Take you to the zoo.
79
00:04:08,916 --> 00:04:11,761
Thank you, but I don't
Wanna go to the zoo.
80
00:04:11,785 --> 00:04:14,185
I don't wanna go
To the zoo either.
81
00:04:15,355 --> 00:04:18,568
Well, how about a pony ride?
82
00:04:18,592 --> 00:04:20,712
Ooh, now you're talking!
83
00:04:24,030 --> 00:04:27,209
Look, I'll go fix you lunch,
While you girls get acquainted,
84
00:04:27,233 --> 00:04:31,803
- okay? Come on, stanley.
- whoo, a pony ride, wow.
85
00:04:34,207 --> 00:04:36,820
- would you like
To sit down, laurie?
- thank you.
86
00:04:36,844 --> 00:04:40,256
Sure. That's a
Pretty good couch.
87
00:04:40,280 --> 00:04:43,326
So you're laurie?
88
00:04:43,350 --> 00:04:44,894
Mm-hmm.
89
00:04:44,918 --> 00:04:47,797
Oh, what a dumb
Thing for me to say,
90
00:04:47,821 --> 00:04:50,533
"So you're laurie?" I mean,
Who else would you be, right?
91
00:04:54,861 --> 00:04:58,207
Hey, I have the latest
Peter frampton album.
92
00:04:58,231 --> 00:05:01,110
- do you want to hear it?
- not especially.
93
00:05:01,134 --> 00:05:03,412
- oh.
- janet: oh.
94
00:05:03,436 --> 00:05:05,414
Well... Whoo, whoo,
95
00:05:05,438 --> 00:05:08,873
Jack, you have got to meet jack.
96
00:05:10,210 --> 00:05:12,188
- jack.
- ha!
97
00:05:12,212 --> 00:05:14,913
Careful, I almost
Scorched my giblets.
98
00:05:17,984 --> 00:05:20,730
- what's wrong with you?
- well... I'm very sorry.
99
00:05:20,754 --> 00:05:24,200
I'm very sorry, but we have kind
Of an emergency in the other room.
100
00:05:24,224 --> 00:05:26,703
There's this little
Girl, her name is laurie...
101
00:05:26,727 --> 00:05:28,905
Well, her mommy
Just got remarried...
102
00:05:28,929 --> 00:05:31,608
- how old are you, laurie?
- I'm 13.
103
00:05:31,632 --> 00:05:35,199
Really? When I was
Your age, I was 13 too.
104
00:05:43,777 --> 00:05:46,856
- is that laurie?
- oh, yes, jack. This is laurie.
105
00:05:46,880 --> 00:05:49,993
Hello, laurie, I'm very
Happy to meet you.
106
00:05:50,017 --> 00:05:51,861
Why are you crying?
107
00:05:51,885 --> 00:05:54,230
I was just slicing some
Onions in the kitchen...
108
00:05:54,254 --> 00:05:55,264
Excuse me.
109
00:05:59,092 --> 00:06:02,493
I fooled you. It's
Only a sponge.
110
00:06:03,897 --> 00:06:05,875
You're funny.
111
00:06:05,899 --> 00:06:08,310
- thank you.
- thanks, jack.
112
00:06:08,334 --> 00:06:11,213
- do you do the cooking here?
- yeah, but not only
The cooking,
113
00:06:11,237 --> 00:06:13,215
I'm also the nurse
Of the household.
114
00:06:13,239 --> 00:06:15,785
Hello, little girl, how are you?
115
00:06:15,809 --> 00:06:18,254
Let's check your temperature.
116
00:06:18,278 --> 00:06:21,518
Oh, you're suffering from
A loose mickey mouse watch.
117
00:06:23,116 --> 00:06:25,594
And sometimes I even dance.
118
00:06:25,618 --> 00:06:30,221
♪ knee-knee knee-knee knee-knee
Knee-knee ♪ knee... Get it? Knee.
119
00:06:31,624 --> 00:06:35,504
But, best of all... At midnight,
I climb out of my coffin...
120
00:06:35,528 --> 00:06:38,574
And I turn into a vampire.
121
00:06:40,600 --> 00:06:42,578
Oh, look, a blond neck!
122
00:06:42,602 --> 00:06:44,881
- what a lovely neck
You have, my darling.
- jack...
123
00:06:44,905 --> 00:06:47,449
Come on, jack.
124
00:06:47,473 --> 00:06:50,386
Ha-ha! Boy, I'm glad to see
125
00:06:50,410 --> 00:06:53,589
You all are getting
Along so well,
126
00:06:53,613 --> 00:06:56,025
Especially jack and chrissy.
127
00:06:56,049 --> 00:06:59,650
Oh, mrs. Roper, I was just showing
Laurie what I do around here.
128
00:07:03,957 --> 00:07:06,991
Stanley only fixes toilets.
129
00:07:08,294 --> 00:07:11,841
I got your lunch
Ready. Come on, honey.
130
00:07:11,865 --> 00:07:15,011
- can't I stay a little longer?
- you can come back
This afternoon.
131
00:07:15,035 --> 00:07:17,313
- oh, great!
- bye, laurie.
132
00:07:17,337 --> 00:07:20,937
Hey, laurie, it was really
Nice meeting you. We...
133
00:07:21,575 --> 00:07:23,987
I really liked
Meeting you, jack.
134
00:07:24,011 --> 00:07:26,210
It was a pleasure
To meet you, milady.
135
00:07:27,280 --> 00:07:29,347
- jack: bye-bye.
- laurie: bye.
136
00:07:31,952 --> 00:07:34,864
Wow! That little
Girl looked at you
137
00:07:34,888 --> 00:07:37,066
Like you were robert redford.
138
00:07:37,090 --> 00:07:39,758
Oh, well, a lot of people
Notice the resemblance.
139
00:07:41,461 --> 00:07:44,229
Hey...
140
00:07:48,935 --> 00:07:50,869
- whoo, whoo, whoo.
- no!
141
00:07:52,939 --> 00:07:55,084
It's so nice and cozy.
It's just the three of us
142
00:07:55,108 --> 00:07:57,286
Spending a quiet
Evening together.
143
00:07:57,310 --> 00:07:59,521
Yeah, waiting for a
Delicious turkey dinner.
144
00:07:59,545 --> 00:08:01,758
Oh, I'll get it.
145
00:08:01,782 --> 00:08:03,760
I'm watching you.
146
00:08:03,784 --> 00:08:07,318
Hello. Oh, yeah. Can you
Hold on while I get a pencil?
147
00:08:08,755 --> 00:08:10,900
Okay, go ahead.
148
00:08:10,924 --> 00:08:13,435
Mm-hmm. Uh-huh.
149
00:08:13,459 --> 00:08:17,228
- are you gonna jump her?
- maybe, but first let's
Finish the chess game.
150
00:08:26,173 --> 00:08:28,517
Okay. Wow, list...
Thank you very much.
151
00:08:28,541 --> 00:08:30,186
Bye.
152
00:08:30,210 --> 00:08:33,389
Chrissy, chrissy,
Listen to this telegram.
153
00:08:33,413 --> 00:08:35,992
"Janet and chrissy, you
Are invited to a barbecue
154
00:08:36,016 --> 00:08:38,761
At the marina yacht club
At 8:00 o'clock sharp tonight.
155
00:08:38,785 --> 00:08:41,664
Hope you can make it.
Signed, you know who."
156
00:08:41,688 --> 00:08:45,367
The marina yacht club?! I've
Always wanted to go there!
157
00:08:45,391 --> 00:08:47,236
Well, who's "You know who"?
158
00:08:47,260 --> 00:08:49,706
I don't know who.
Don't you know who?
159
00:08:49,730 --> 00:08:52,363
No, I don't know "You know
Who," I know "Guess who."
160
00:08:53,633 --> 00:08:56,513
It's janet and costello.
161
00:08:56,537 --> 00:08:58,681
- yippy, I know who
"You know who" is.
- janet: who?
162
00:08:58,705 --> 00:09:01,750
- it's dr. Bickman,
Our dentist.
- what?!
163
00:09:01,774 --> 00:09:03,552
You know, it's
Time for a cleaning.
164
00:09:03,576 --> 00:09:07,056
He always calls and
Says, "This is you know who.
165
00:09:07,080 --> 00:09:09,814
Come on in and
Get rid of the goo."
166
00:09:12,786 --> 00:09:16,699
Yeah, that's right. And he
Does belong to the yacht club.
167
00:09:16,723 --> 00:09:18,735
Yes! 8:00 o'clock,
We can just make it.
168
00:09:18,759 --> 00:09:21,503
Oh, chrissy. I can't believe
It... The marina yacht club?
169
00:09:21,527 --> 00:09:23,539
Hey, listen, you think
We are dressed okay?
170
00:09:23,563 --> 00:09:25,608
It's only a barbecue. Come on.
171
00:09:25,632 --> 00:09:27,744
- you mean you're going?
- oh, are you kidding?
172
00:09:27,768 --> 00:09:30,446
Do you think we're gonna
Turn down an invitation like this?
173
00:09:30,470 --> 00:09:34,773
- what about the turkey?
- sorry, but they only
Invited us.
174
00:09:36,910 --> 00:09:38,990
Janet: bye, laurie.
175
00:09:40,280 --> 00:09:42,225
- hi, jack.
- hi.
176
00:09:42,249 --> 00:09:45,394
- am I interrupting dinner?
- no, in fact you're gonna
Help me eat it.
177
00:09:45,418 --> 00:09:47,978
- oh, that will
Be wonderful.
- come on.
178
00:09:57,264 --> 00:09:59,530
Boy, that is a vintage cow.
179
00:10:01,567 --> 00:10:05,081
Jack, you're the best
Cook in the whole world.
180
00:10:05,105 --> 00:10:07,149
Oh, you don't have to say that.
181
00:10:07,173 --> 00:10:10,586
- but it's true.
- I know, but you don't
Have to say it.
182
00:10:10,610 --> 00:10:13,244
Excuse me.
183
00:10:17,718 --> 00:10:19,996
Hi, jack. Remember me?
184
00:10:20,020 --> 00:10:21,964
Rita! Of course.
185
00:10:21,988 --> 00:10:24,989
I never forget a
Bod... A face. Come on in.
186
00:10:26,827 --> 00:10:30,472
- I've come to take you up
On your offer.
- my offer?!
187
00:10:30,496 --> 00:10:32,541
Yeah, don't you remember?
188
00:10:32,565 --> 00:10:35,444
At larry's party. You said,
189
00:10:35,468 --> 00:10:38,280
"Rita, any night
You feel restless
190
00:10:38,304 --> 00:10:40,516
And lonely, you come on over."
191
00:10:40,540 --> 00:10:42,919
Oh, yeah.
192
00:10:42,943 --> 00:10:45,121
Hi. I'm laurie.
193
00:10:45,145 --> 00:10:47,123
Oh, yes, I... Laurie's
Living downstairs.
194
00:10:47,147 --> 00:10:49,125
We've just had dinner together.
195
00:10:49,149 --> 00:10:51,194
Oh, how sweet.
196
00:10:51,218 --> 00:10:53,162
Well, now that
She's had her din-din,
197
00:10:53,186 --> 00:10:55,998
Don't you think she
Should be running along?
198
00:10:56,022 --> 00:10:58,500
Oh, yes. Laurie, it's time
199
00:10:58,524 --> 00:11:00,458
For the grown-ups
To have dessert.
200
00:11:04,130 --> 00:11:06,108
I enjoyed this evening, jack.
201
00:11:06,132 --> 00:11:08,632
Yes, it's going to be wonderful.
202
00:11:11,238 --> 00:11:14,884
Rita, would you like to make
Yourself comfortable on the couch?
203
00:11:14,908 --> 00:11:17,342
I thought you'd never ask.
204
00:11:18,778 --> 00:11:21,145
Well...
205
00:11:22,782 --> 00:11:25,950
- do you mind? I'm a righty.
- oh.
206
00:11:31,491 --> 00:11:34,658
You know, jack...
207
00:11:36,196 --> 00:11:38,674
I'm from the school
That says that
208
00:11:38,698 --> 00:11:41,799
If you really
Attracted to somebody
209
00:11:44,204 --> 00:11:46,949
Well, you should kind of like
210
00:11:46,973 --> 00:11:49,740
Give yourself to him totally.
211
00:11:50,911 --> 00:11:52,843
That's a good school.
212
00:11:54,480 --> 00:11:56,993
Go away.
213
00:11:57,017 --> 00:11:59,929
go away!
214
00:11:59,953 --> 00:12:02,987
You better answer it.
215
00:12:07,627 --> 00:12:10,706
I wanted to know if you would like
To go for an ice-cream soda later.
216
00:12:10,730 --> 00:12:13,142
That's very nice of you,
Laurie, but not tonight.
217
00:12:13,166 --> 00:12:16,301
Rita and I have a lot
Of homework to do.
218
00:12:18,104 --> 00:12:21,217
- now where was I?
- on the right track, jack.
219
00:12:21,241 --> 00:12:24,408
Oh, yeah?
220
00:12:28,348 --> 00:12:31,115
- what?!
- I forgot my keys.
221
00:12:45,765 --> 00:12:49,411
I... Hope I didn't disturb you.
222
00:12:49,435 --> 00:12:52,181
- this is getting ridiculous.
- no, no, rita.
223
00:12:52,205 --> 00:12:56,006
I'll lock the door.
It's locked, okay?
224
00:13:06,519 --> 00:13:09,898
Lovely rita.
225
00:13:12,458 --> 00:13:14,636
I took your key by mistake.
226
00:13:14,660 --> 00:13:18,040
- that does it.
- wait. Rita, hang on.
227
00:13:18,064 --> 00:13:21,310
- rita, where are you going?
- somewhere where there's
Less traffic,
228
00:13:21,334 --> 00:13:24,368
- like on
The hollywood freeway.
- rita...
229
00:13:26,506 --> 00:13:30,319
Gee, she left so suddenly.
230
00:13:30,343 --> 00:13:33,611
- do you think she was
Anxious to go to bed?
- I'm positive.
231
00:13:35,582 --> 00:13:38,894
This surely isn't my night. I mean,
Everybody is running out on me!
232
00:13:38,918 --> 00:13:40,829
I'd never run out on you, jack.
233
00:13:40,853 --> 00:13:44,266
I know. You just
Keep running in on me.
234
00:13:44,290 --> 00:13:47,503
How do you like that, all the way
To the marina yacht club to find out
235
00:13:47,527 --> 00:13:50,072
- they weren't even
Having a barbecue!
- they weren't?
236
00:13:50,096 --> 00:13:52,608
- chrissy and janet: no!
- janet: we called
Dr. Bickman,
237
00:13:52,632 --> 00:13:54,877
He said he didn't know
Anything about a telegram.
238
00:13:54,901 --> 00:13:56,745
The whole thing was a fake!
239
00:13:56,769 --> 00:13:59,370
Well, that's terrible!
I wonder who said it.
240
00:14:09,782 --> 00:14:13,862
What a rotten trick, all the way to
The marina yacht club for nothing.
241
00:14:13,886 --> 00:14:16,132
Oh, yeah. Boy, chrissy,
242
00:14:16,156 --> 00:14:18,935
We should have stayed at
Home like we planned with jack.
243
00:14:18,959 --> 00:14:21,070
Yeah, we never
Should've left you, jack.
244
00:14:21,094 --> 00:14:23,705
No, not after you worked
So hard on that turkey.
245
00:14:23,729 --> 00:14:26,442
Oh, well, I must admit...
246
00:14:26,466 --> 00:14:29,245
I did get quite depressed.
247
00:14:29,269 --> 00:14:31,747
In fact, I've developed
A splitting headache.
248
00:14:31,771 --> 00:14:33,749
- chrissy: oh.
- janet: oh, poor baby.
249
00:14:33,773 --> 00:14:35,751
Yeah. Janet, would
You do me a favor?
250
00:14:35,775 --> 00:14:38,986
Could you rub my temples?
It would feel so soothing.
251
00:14:39,010 --> 00:14:40,088
Oh, my pleasure.
252
00:14:40,112 --> 00:14:44,092
- and chrissy, would you mind
Massaging my toes?
- oh, sure.
253
00:14:44,116 --> 00:14:46,094
I've been standing in
Front of a hot stove...
254
00:14:46,118 --> 00:14:48,598
That feels so good!
255
00:14:50,056 --> 00:14:53,669
Jack, can you ever forgive
Us for leaving you alone?
256
00:14:53,693 --> 00:14:56,639
Oh, jack wasn't alone.
We had dinner together.
257
00:14:56,663 --> 00:14:58,974
- chrissy: oh.
- oh, that's nice.
258
00:14:58,998 --> 00:15:00,976
It was delicious.
259
00:15:01,000 --> 00:15:04,513
We had turkey and
Stuffing, mashed potatoes...
260
00:15:04,537 --> 00:15:06,470
- and rita.
- chrissy: rita?
261
00:15:07,940 --> 00:15:09,707
Rita? Is that a dish?
262
00:15:13,313 --> 00:15:15,624
- she sure is.
- janet: she...?
263
00:15:15,648 --> 00:15:17,859
- jack: no...
- janet: jack!
264
00:15:19,885 --> 00:15:21,997
My knee!
265
00:15:22,021 --> 00:15:24,266
All right, jack.
Come on, who is rita?
266
00:15:24,290 --> 00:15:28,036
Well, it's... Rita marie but I barely
Had any time to speak to her.
267
00:15:28,060 --> 00:15:30,472
- isn't that right, laurie?
- that's right.
268
00:15:30,496 --> 00:15:33,108
It's hard to talk
When you're kissing.
269
00:15:33,132 --> 00:15:35,944
Oh. Chrissy, if you had
A date and you wanted
270
00:15:35,968 --> 00:15:37,813
To get rid of your roommates
271
00:15:37,837 --> 00:15:40,277
In a big hurry,
What would you do?
272
00:15:41,741 --> 00:15:43,674
Yell, "Fire!"
273
00:15:47,246 --> 00:15:49,792
No, chrissy. You
Would send a telegram.
274
00:15:49,816 --> 00:15:53,136
But what if the place burned
Down before it was delivered?
275
00:15:56,021 --> 00:15:58,467
Chrissy!
276
00:15:58,491 --> 00:16:01,651
Jack is the one who
Sent us that telegram!
277
00:16:03,663 --> 00:16:06,007
You mean, he is "You know who"?
278
00:16:06,031 --> 00:16:08,410
Yes. And he's also
A "You know what"!
279
00:16:08,434 --> 00:16:11,580
Wait a minute, why would
I do a thing like that?
280
00:16:11,604 --> 00:16:15,183
Because you wanted to be
Alone with your precious rita.
281
00:16:15,207 --> 00:16:17,085
Why would I wanna
Be alone with rita?
282
00:16:17,109 --> 00:16:20,109
- because she was
Restless and lonely.
- don't help me, laurie.
283
00:16:22,014 --> 00:16:24,626
Well, jack, if you are
So anxious to be alone,
284
00:16:24,650 --> 00:16:26,662
Chrissy and I will
Gladly leave you alone.
285
00:16:26,686 --> 00:16:29,431
- let's go down and eat
At the regal beagle.
- wait a minute,
286
00:16:29,455 --> 00:16:31,567
But... But there's
Plenty of turkey left.
287
00:16:31,591 --> 00:16:35,191
Jack, we wouldn't touch
Your turkey with a 10-foot fork.
288
00:16:38,565 --> 00:16:40,376
Can you imagine that,
289
00:16:40,400 --> 00:16:43,179
Them accusing me of a
Childish trick like that?
290
00:16:43,203 --> 00:16:46,015
- you're better
Off without them.
- you're darn right I am!
291
00:16:46,039 --> 00:16:48,672
I know. That's why I
Sent the telegram.
292
00:16:51,211 --> 00:16:54,656
You?! You sent
The telegram? Why?
293
00:16:54,680 --> 00:16:56,859
I wanted to be alone with you.
294
00:16:56,883 --> 00:16:59,828
- okay, laurie,
You're coming with me.
- where're you taking me?
295
00:16:59,852 --> 00:17:02,831
You're gonna tell janet and
Chrissy that you sent that telegram.
296
00:17:02,855 --> 00:17:05,601
No. No, I'll never tell.
297
00:17:05,625 --> 00:17:08,637
Yes, you will. Or else there's
Gonna be some big trouble.
298
00:17:08,661 --> 00:17:10,772
Why are you getting so mad?
299
00:17:10,796 --> 00:17:13,164
I only did it 'cause I love you.
300
00:17:20,273 --> 00:17:23,452
Laurie, I think you and I
Better have a little talk.
301
00:17:23,476 --> 00:17:25,409
Sit down.
302
00:17:29,215 --> 00:17:31,455
You know, laurie... Move over.
303
00:17:32,251 --> 00:17:34,184
The other way.
304
00:17:36,456 --> 00:17:38,834
Now, come on,
Laurie, listen to me.
305
00:17:38,858 --> 00:17:40,869
You know...
306
00:17:40,893 --> 00:17:44,206
In life, there are... All
Different kinds of love.
307
00:17:44,230 --> 00:17:47,209
You love your mommy, you love
Your friends, you love your dog...
308
00:17:47,233 --> 00:17:49,245
I don't have a
Dog. I have a cat.
309
00:17:49,269 --> 00:17:52,781
- okay, you love your cat...
- I hate my cat.
310
00:17:52,805 --> 00:17:54,783
Laurie, laurie...
How old are you?
311
00:17:54,807 --> 00:17:57,586
- 13.
- I'm almost
Twice your age.
312
00:17:57,610 --> 00:17:59,410
Don't worry. I'll catch up.
313
00:18:00,480 --> 00:18:02,558
- what?
- well,
314
00:18:02,582 --> 00:18:05,461
When I'm 26, you'll only be 39.
315
00:18:05,485 --> 00:18:07,096
And that's only as half as old.
316
00:18:07,120 --> 00:18:09,698
No, laurie. What
I'm trying to say...
317
00:18:09,722 --> 00:18:12,968
And when you're
80, I'll only be 67
318
00:18:12,992 --> 00:18:14,970
So I'll be able to
Take care of you.
319
00:18:14,994 --> 00:18:17,973
Oh, that's very nice... No,
But... But that's not the point.
320
00:18:17,997 --> 00:18:19,975
Laurie, what I'm
Trying to say is,
321
00:18:19,999 --> 00:18:24,280
Right now you're too young
To know what real love is.
322
00:18:24,304 --> 00:18:26,715
What is real love?
323
00:18:26,739 --> 00:18:31,520
Real love is... Well, when you
Care about a person so much
324
00:18:31,544 --> 00:18:35,224
You'd rather be with them
Than anybody in the whole world.
325
00:18:35,248 --> 00:18:37,248
Then I love you.
326
00:18:38,684 --> 00:18:40,762
Oh, that's so sweet... Laurie.
327
00:18:40,786 --> 00:18:42,920
And... And I thank you, but...
328
00:18:43,990 --> 00:18:46,102
See, the problem...
The thing is...
329
00:18:46,126 --> 00:18:50,038
Is... Is... That I
Don't love you.
330
00:18:50,062 --> 00:18:52,941
- that'll come in time.
- no, it won't.
331
00:18:52,965 --> 00:18:56,545
Laurie, I'm older than you,
So you have to listen to me!
332
00:18:56,569 --> 00:18:58,814
Now, come on. Look, look...
This is not gonna last.
333
00:18:58,838 --> 00:19:01,449
It's no good between us, laurie.
334
00:19:01,473 --> 00:19:03,952
You will forget all about me.
335
00:19:03,976 --> 00:19:06,722
- I'll never forget you.
- yes, you will.
336
00:19:06,746 --> 00:19:09,290
I'll never forget you,
Not as long as I live.
337
00:19:09,314 --> 00:19:11,292
Young lady, you're
Coming with me
338
00:19:11,316 --> 00:19:13,996
And you're telling janet and
Chrissy exactly what you did
339
00:19:14,020 --> 00:19:15,697
Or you may not live that long.
340
00:19:15,721 --> 00:19:18,355
- I just love a man
Who's forceful.
- move.
341
00:19:25,264 --> 00:19:29,077
- oh, thank you.
- oh, thank you.
342
00:19:29,101 --> 00:19:31,079
Chrissy, I'm so hungry
I could eat a horse.
343
00:19:31,103 --> 00:19:33,470
I'm so hungry I
Could eat its saddle.
344
00:19:35,942 --> 00:19:38,921
I think we are.
345
00:19:38,945 --> 00:19:41,523
- gee whiz, - what
A day this has been!
346
00:19:41,547 --> 00:19:43,926
Janet, chrissy, I've got
Something to say to you.
347
00:19:43,950 --> 00:19:47,529
Well, we have nothing to say
To you, mr. Big telegram sender.
348
00:19:47,553 --> 00:19:49,798
All right. Come on, move
Over. Janet, move over.
349
00:19:49,822 --> 00:19:51,733
Sit down, laurie. Move over.
350
00:19:51,757 --> 00:19:53,969
Chrissy, move over.
351
00:19:53,993 --> 00:19:55,971
Now...
352
00:19:55,995 --> 00:19:58,874
You have shunned me. You
Have defamed my character.
353
00:19:58,898 --> 00:20:01,743
You have accused me, but now
You're going to eat those words,
354
00:20:01,767 --> 00:20:05,836
Because little laurie here has something
To say about who really sent that telegram.
355
00:20:08,641 --> 00:20:11,653
Go ahead, laurie.
Tell them who sent it.
356
00:20:11,677 --> 00:20:14,590
Gosh, jack, if
You didn't send it,
357
00:20:14,614 --> 00:20:17,593
I don't know who did.
358
00:20:17,617 --> 00:20:21,630
- laurie, you sent that
Telegram! Go tell them.
- janet: jack!
359
00:20:21,654 --> 00:20:25,033
- it was her.
- that's awful! Trying
To blame an innocent girl!
360
00:20:25,057 --> 00:20:27,703
Jack, I didn't even think that
You could stoop that low.
361
00:20:27,727 --> 00:20:30,038
- let's go, chrissy.
- now wait a second...
362
00:20:30,062 --> 00:20:33,230
- jack, forget it.
- chrissy, chrissy,
You believe me, don't you?
363
00:20:36,335 --> 00:20:39,314
You promised me that
You were gonna tell them.
364
00:20:39,338 --> 00:20:41,939
A woman has a right
To change her mind.
365
00:20:47,980 --> 00:20:49,913
Make a wish.
366
00:20:55,521 --> 00:20:57,487
Good morning.
367
00:20:59,158 --> 00:21:02,826
Janet, can I have part
Of that paper, please?
368
00:21:04,063 --> 00:21:06,008
May I inform you, ms. Wood,
369
00:21:06,032 --> 00:21:08,398
That I pay for one
Third of that newspaper?
370
00:21:16,341 --> 00:21:19,587
That's very funny. Don't you
Think this is getting ridiculous?
371
00:21:19,611 --> 00:21:23,158
Jack, we are not
Talking to you today.
372
00:21:23,182 --> 00:21:26,294
Girl... This is getting
Out of hand now.
373
00:21:26,318 --> 00:21:27,963
- come on now.
- did you hear me, jack?
374
00:21:27,987 --> 00:21:30,453
We are not talking to
You today. Right, chrissy?
375
00:21:32,024 --> 00:21:34,936
Chrissy? It's
Okay to talk to me.
376
00:21:34,960 --> 00:21:37,438
Oh. Right.
377
00:21:43,769 --> 00:21:47,315
Oh, hi. Jack, could we
See you for a minute?
378
00:21:47,339 --> 00:21:49,350
Sure, come in.
379
00:21:49,374 --> 00:21:53,288
Stanley and I have had a
Nice, long talk with laurie
380
00:21:53,312 --> 00:21:55,256
And she has something
381
00:21:55,280 --> 00:21:57,647
That she wants to say to you.
382
00:21:59,518 --> 00:22:01,918
Come on, kid, spill it.
383
00:22:06,425 --> 00:22:09,004
I was the one who
Sent that telegram.
384
00:22:09,028 --> 00:22:10,739
See? What did I tell you?
385
00:22:10,763 --> 00:22:13,408
You did?
386
00:22:13,432 --> 00:22:16,845
- but why?
- I just wanted to be
Alone with jack.
387
00:22:16,869 --> 00:22:19,548
Yeah, but sending a telegram
388
00:22:19,572 --> 00:22:21,650
Was a rotten thing to do.
389
00:22:21,674 --> 00:22:25,274
I'll say... She charged
It to my phone.
390
00:22:26,679 --> 00:22:29,224
It's hard to believe.
391
00:22:29,248 --> 00:22:32,494
I'll say... $7.50.
392
00:22:32,518 --> 00:22:34,563
That wasn't very nice.
393
00:22:34,587 --> 00:22:37,421
- I'll say... She...
- you've said enough.
394
00:22:38,858 --> 00:22:41,269
- I'm sorry.
- janet: oh, well...
395
00:22:41,293 --> 00:22:45,540
Don't you think you're all
Being a little rough on laurie?
396
00:22:45,564 --> 00:22:48,143
So she's young
And impressionable
397
00:22:48,167 --> 00:22:50,846
And she happened to fall
In love with the kid here.
398
00:22:50,870 --> 00:22:53,548
I mean, who can blame her?
399
00:22:53,572 --> 00:22:56,317
While we're talking about
Love, I have something to tell you.
400
00:22:56,341 --> 00:22:59,387
- uh-huh.
- I like you very much,
401
00:22:59,411 --> 00:23:02,379
But I need someone
Who's a little more mature.
402
00:23:06,551 --> 00:23:10,766
- oh, really?
- oh, it's okay. I already found someone.
403
00:23:10,790 --> 00:23:12,901
- you did?
- yeah. Albert.
404
00:23:12,925 --> 00:23:15,270
- chrissy: albert?
- hey albert,
405
00:23:15,294 --> 00:23:18,507
You can come up now.
406
00:23:18,531 --> 00:23:21,242
Everybody, this is albert.
407
00:23:21,266 --> 00:23:23,200
- hi.
- all: hi.
408
00:23:24,536 --> 00:23:27,470
Albert, this is jack, the
Man I was involved with.
409
00:23:29,041 --> 00:23:30,886
- hi, albert.
- what's happening?
410
00:23:30,910 --> 00:23:33,354
Oh, fine, thank you.
411
00:23:33,378 --> 00:23:35,690
Don't take this too hard,
412
00:23:35,714 --> 00:23:38,526
I'm sure you'll find
Yourself another old lady.
413
00:23:38,550 --> 00:23:40,561
- you think so?
- sure.
414
00:23:40,585 --> 00:23:42,530
Come on, let's go skateboard.
415
00:23:42,554 --> 00:23:45,467
- laurie: can't we
Go to the beach?
- skateboarding.
416
00:23:45,491 --> 00:23:47,291
I just love a man
Who's forceful.
417
00:23:50,129 --> 00:23:51,661
Women.
418
00:23:59,371 --> 00:24:02,184
Kids... They're impossible.
419
00:24:02,208 --> 00:24:06,944
Oh, come on, stanley,
You were a kid once.
420
00:24:08,013 --> 00:24:10,125
Weren't you?
421
00:24:10,149 --> 00:24:14,262
You can't blame laurie
For having a crush on jack.
422
00:24:14,286 --> 00:24:16,731
Yeah, between you and me,
423
00:24:16,755 --> 00:24:19,189
Isn't it love crazy?
424
00:24:23,162 --> 00:24:26,029
Between you and me,
It would be ridiculous.
425
00:24:51,123 --> 00:24:53,501
Ritter's voice: three's
Company was videotaped
426
00:24:53,525 --> 00:24:55,726
in front of a studio audience.
33232
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