All language subtitles for Fast.Times.at.Ridgemont.High.1982.REMASTERED.1080p.BluRay.x265-RARBG

Linda, Linda, Linda. There he is.
There's that guy from the stereo store.

Don't you think
he looks like Richard Gere?

Did you see his cute little butt?

Okay, you guys, let's talk about
that fox that just walked in.

We already were.

I'm gonna go over there, okay,
and change the shakers.

Cool out. That's Stacy's section.

Oh, he's too old.
She's not even in high school yet.

Smoking's upstairs to your left.

Smoking's upstairs.

Hey, Rat, is Dolly Parton giving you
a percentage of the profit?

What can I do for you, gentlemen?

Are you the guy
with the Van Halen tickets?

I could be.

How much you want for something
in the first ten rows?

Twenty bucks apiece.

Those tickets were only 12.50.

So don't buy 'em.

Come on, Arnold.
All the other scalpers are sold out.

Scalper? Did you call me a scalper?

Listen, gentlemen,
I perform a service here.

And the service costs money.

Now, do you want the tickets or don't you?

Okay, we'll take 'em.

- All right. What did I say? Twenty-five?
- Twenty.

Sound.

Thank you.

Just made 16 bucks, Rat.

- What's the matter? You look depressed.
- I hate working the theater.

All the action's
on the other side of the mall.

How's it going?

- You wanna take his table?
- Yes.

Go for it. He's cute.

Just take his order, look him in the eye,

and if he says anything remotely funny,

just laugh like you never heard
anything so funny.

And smile.

Go for it.

So, you working hard or hardly working?

You look like you could still be
in high school.

Yeah, I know. Everybody says that.

How old are you?

Nineteen. How old are you?

Twenty-six.

Think we could still be friends?

So, what can I get for you?

How about a meatball sandwich...

a medium Coke...

and your phone number?

- Hi.
- Hello.

Get out of here, Bradley.

Dave.

- How you doing, Brad?
- Cooking.

Daddy's home, boys.
We shall serve no fries before their time.

Uh, this one's on you, dude.

Who's got the beaucoup dólares today?

Uno dinero.

What have you got, Mr. Buck Man?

I got a cigarette.

I got uno nickelette.

Hey.

You guys had shirts on
when you came in here.

But something happened
to 'em, man.

Come on, Spicoli,
just put the shirts back on.

You see that sign?

- "No shirt. No shoes."
- "No dice."

Right.

Learn it.

Know it.

Live it.

- Whoa.
- He's the full hot orator.

Linda, did I show you this?
He gave me his card.

"Ron Johnson, Audio Consultant."

Maybe we should get a frame for this
and put it up on the wall.

Come on, Linda, you're the one who told me
I was gonna get a boyfriend at the mall.

Do you think he'll call this week?

- Stace, why don't you just call him?
- I can't.

Yes, you can.
Guys love that sort of thing.

- Really?
- Yes.

Stacy, what are you waiting for?
You're 15 years old.

I did it when I was 13.

It's no huge thing. It's just sex.

He was hot, wasn't he?

If I didn't have a fiancé in Chicago,
I'd go for it.

Hey, how you doing?

Oh, those guys are hot.

Um, do you know where F10 is?

Sure. You just go
right down the hall and turn left.

Shit.

Hi, Bradley.

Growing up. Looking good.

Another year joined at the lips.

- Hi, Brad!
- Denise. I'd make you see God.

Brad!

- The Cruising Vessel.
- Bradley!

Thanks, David.

Six more payments, gentlemen,

and this beautiful blue
four-door luxury sedan is all mine.

I'll give you four tickets
in the fifth row

for the low, low price of $140.

Hey, see that car?

Some alumni gave Jefferson that car
for playing football

when he was a sophomore.

Helped him pick it out.

- Slick car.
- We go way back, you know.

Hey, Charles. How you doing, buddy?

Car looks great.

I mean, really terrific.
You're really keeping it up wonderfully.

Don't fuck with it.

Shit. That's my man.

- Brad.
- Arnold. What's happening?

Um, can I talk to you a minute?

Sure, man.

Uh, I really hate Bronco Burger, man.

Ever since they started with the chicken
nuggets, everything went downhill.

You have to fry
all their greasy food and everything.

You have to polish things.
The manager's an asshole. I mean...

I was, um, just wondering ̶̶

Arnold, you want to work
at All-American Burger.

- Yeah, well, um...
- I can probably get you in there.

Just let me talk to Dennis Taylor.

- All right!
- Okay.

Wait. You hear the bell ring?

- What bell?
- We're here.

Oh, we're not late.

Aloha.

My name is Mr. Hand.

I have but one question for you.

Can you attend my class?

It is for your own good.

And if you can't make it, I can make you.

We have a 20-question quiz every Friday.

Your grade is the average
of all your quizzes,

plus the midterm and final,
which counts for one-third, got it?

Also...

...there will be no eating.

E-A-I-I-N-G.

No eating in this class.

You get used to doing your own business
on your own time.

That's one demand I make.

Just like you wouldn't want me
to come to your house some evening

and discuss US history
on your time, understand?

Yes, sir.

This guy's been stoned
since the third grade.

- Yes?
- Yeah, I'm registered in this class.

What class?

This is US history.
See the globe right there.

- Really?
- Yeah.

May I come in?

Oh, please.

I get so lonely when I hear
that third attendance bell ring

and all my kids are not here.

Sorry I'm late.

It's just, like,
this new schedule's totally confusing.

I know that dude.

- Mr. Spicoli?
- That's the name they gave me.

- Hey, you're ripping my card.
- Yes.

Hey, bud, what's your problem?

No problem at all.

I think you know
where the front office is.

You dick!

I have taken the time to print up
a complete schedule of class quizzes

and the chapters they cover.

Please pass them to the desks behind you.

Back, back, back.

You hear about the surfer guy who pulled
a knife on Mr. Hand this morning?

Oh, no. He just called him a dick.

- Dick?
- Mm-hmm.

Oh, God. People exaggerate so much here.

Linda, that girl looks
just like Pat Benatar.

I know.

Wait. There are three girls
here at Ridgemont

who have cultivated the Pat Benatar look.

Chanel Semlar.

Mary Ann Zlotnick, in the red tights.

Do you think guys find that
more attractive?

Oh, Stacy, please. Give me a break.
You are so much prettier than them.

Yeah, I know.

But you'd think they'd be better in bed.

What do you mean, better in bed?
You either do it or you don't.

No. There are, like, variables
that I might not be good at.

Like what variables?

Like, you know, giving blow jobs.

What's the big deal?

- I never did it.
- You've never given a blow job?

- Mm-mmm.
- Never?

Stace, there's nothing to it.
It's so easy.

- Yo, check it out.
- Here.

Relax your throat muscles.

Don't bite.

And slide it in.

Try it again.

Good. Push it slowly in and out.

- You got it.
- Okay.

Can I ask you something
and you promise not to laugh?

- Sure.
- Okay.

When a guy has an orgasm,
how much comes out?

Quart or so.

No, I'm just kidding. Just practice.

Not with your teeth.

I'm not going to a morgue.
I'll get my mom to write a note.

Nobody's getting me into a room
with a bunch of dead guys.

You have to go. It's part of the final.

I hear it's really disgusting.

- Do you know what they do? Have you heard?
- What?

Well, the bodies are dissected.

Mr. Vargas pulls out parts
of the dead body and holds 'em up, okay?

You mean he reaches in
and pulls this stuff out?

What, like stomach and tumors
or something?

Yeah. Stomach, tumors, entrails.

Good day, everyone. My name is Mr. Vargas.

Look, I'm a little slow today.
I just switched to Sanka.

So have a heart.

All right, now.

The World of Life.

That is the name of the textbook
we will be using in this class.

I'm in love.

See that mustache coming in, Rat?

Can almost press it out.

I'm in love.

You are a wuss. Part wimp and part pussy.

What do you mean, wuss?
This girl is my exact type.

- All right. Where'd you see her?
- My biology class.

- Did you get a number?
- No.

- Did you get a name?
- No, no. It's too soon.

It's never too soon, Rat.

I mean, a girl decides how far she's gonna
let you go in the first five minutes.

Well, what am I supposed to do?

Go up to this strange girl
in my biology class and say,

"Hello. I'd like you to take
your clothes off and jump on me"?

I would.

I mean, I can see it all now.
This is gonna be just like last summer.

You fell in love with that girl
at the Fotomat,

you bought $40 worth of fucking film,

and you never even talked to her.

You don't even own a camera.

Well, you tell me, Mike. What should I do?

This is what you do.

Start from the minute
you walk into biology, Rat.

I mean, don't just walk in.

No, move across the room.

And you don't talk to her.

You use your face.

You use your body. You use everything.

That's what I do.

I mean, I just send out this vibe,

and I have personally found
that women do respond.

I mean, something happens.

Well, naturally something happens.

I mean, you put the vibe out
to 30 million chicks,

something is gonna happen.

That's the idea, Rat.

- That's the attitude.
- The attitude?

Yeah. The attitude dictates

that you don't care whether she comes,
stays, lays or prays.

I mean, whatever happens,
your toes are still tapping.

And when you got that...

...then you have the attitude.

- Good night, Stacy.
- Good night, Mom.

- You look beautiful.
- Thanks. So do you.

Where do you feel like going?

I don't know.

How about the Point?

Okay.

All right. The Point it is.

That's a really nice jacket.

Thanks. Thanks a lot.

It's warm.

Yeah, it is. It's really warm.
I wonder how long it will last.

So...

am I gonna get to first base?

Are you really 19?

Yeah. Yeah, I am. I'm really 19.

So, tell me, do you like Ron?

I like Ron.

- You do?
- But it hurt so bad.

Don't worry. Keep doing it.
It gets a lot better, I swear.

It better.

- Mom says to clean the pool.
- Why can't you do it?

Your friends use the pool.
Your friends messed it up.

Your friends use the pool too.

I take out the garbage.

Brad!

Brad.

- Have Mom and Dad seen these?
- They're not home yet.

- Brad.
- What?

What would you say if I asked you to put
these in the trunk of the Cruising Vessel

and get rid of 'em for me?

- I'd say, "Who the hell is Ron Johnson?"
- Please.

Thank you very much.

Lisa's great.

Yeah.

I don't understand why you wanna break up
with a girl like that.

Well, me and Lisa have been going together
for two years.

I love her and all.

I mean, she's great in bed.

It's just that I'm a single,
successful guy.

And, uh, this is my last year in school.

I mean, this could be
the best year of my life.

I just feel like I need
my freedom now, you know?

Okay. Uh, here's your preparation stuff.

You got your sliced tomatoes,
shredded lettuce, secret sauce.

- What's the secret sauce?
- Thousand Island dressing.

What's the secret sauce of Bronco Burger?

Ketchup and mayonnaise.

- Gotcha.
- Order for you, Bradley.

Were those flowers really for me?

Of course.

How much did they cost?

Don't worry about it.

Wanna go to the Point tonight?

What's there to do at the Point?

What do you mean,
what's there to do at the Point?

We've been going out together
for two years.

I don't wanna have to use sex
as a tool, Brad.

Tool? Tool for what?

We've been going together for two years.

- I don't wanna talk about it here.
- I wanna talk about it.

- Brad.
- Lisa?

Brad!

You gotta flip 'em or they'll burn.

C.

D.

F.

Three weeks we've been talking
about the Platt Amendment.

What are you people, on dope?

A piece of legislation was introduced
into Congress by Senator John Platt.

It was passed in 1906.

This amendment to our Constitution
has a profound impact upon all of our...

Where is Jeff Spicoli?

I saw him earlier today
near the first floor bathrooms.

Is he still on campus?

Anyone?

Yes, Desmond?

I saw him by the food machines.

How long ago?

Right before class.

Okay. Bring him in.

What is this fascination with truancy?

What is it that gets inside your heads?

There are some teachers in this school
who look the other way at truants.

It's a little game that you both play.

They pretend they don't see you.
You pretend you don't ditch.

Now, who pays the price later? You.

Hey, wait a minute.
There's no birthday party for me here.

Hola, Mr. Hand.

What's the reason for your truancy?

Just couldn't make it on time.

You mean you couldn't or you wouldn't?

It was, like, a full crowd scene
at the food lines.

Food will be eaten on your time.

Why are you continuously late
for this class, Mr. Spicoli?

Why do you shamelessly
waste my time like this?

I don't know.

I like that.

"I don't know."

That's nice.

"Mr. Hand, will I pass this class?"

"Gee, Mr. Spicoli, I don't know."

That's nice. I really like that.
You know what I'm gonna do?

I'm going to leave your words
on this board for all my classes to enjoy,

giving you full credit,
of course, Mr. Spicoli.

All right.

- Mommy.
- Oh, no.

How fucking long do I have to wait?

Christmas sucks. I hate it.

Ah, you gotta get used
to working the holidays.

People are always screaming and yelling.

I have to quit this job.

I'm gonna get so fat working here,
no one's ever gonna wanna take me out.

I guess Ron hasn't called yet, huh?

Not since November.

Stacy, what does it matter?
He's a stereo salesman.

What did you wanna do? Marry him?
Have kids with him?

Have this guy come home,
50 years old and bald,

and have that little
Pacific Stereo sign on?

Come on, Stace. Hey, it's his loss.

Got any Blue Öyster Cult?

No. I don't have any Blue Öyster Cult.

I ate 34 pairs last time around.
Where were you?

I was that close to working
at 7-Eleven, you know?

Whoa, bud.

What?

- All right. Play me?
- Totally.

All right. You got quarters?

When are those
Earth, Wind & Fire tickets coming in?

Earth, Wind & Fire?

Geez, uh, I haven't heard anything.

But the minute I do, I'll let you know.

You know, I'm planning on taking
my little brother over here.

Is that your little brother?

He's a good-looking kid.

Uh, great.

Charles Jefferson for Earth, Wind & Fire.
And little brother.

And I'll let you know
when they come around, okay?

Wow. Does he really live here?

I thought he just flew in for games.

Shit. He knows where to come
when he wants some tickets.

All right, now, go on. Get out of here.
Okay? You're messing up my business.

Come on, Rat. Let's go get you a woman.

Wow.

You ready for your moment of truth?

You know, Damone, I noticed I was
starting to get a pimple this morning ̶̶

Rat, the shyness routine
is really starting to aggravate.

I mean, now, who is she anyways, right?
She's a waitress in a pizza parlor.

Huh? Look at her.

Look at you.

Member of the honor roll.

Assistant to the assistant manager
of the movie theater.

I'm telling you, Rat,

if this girl can't smell
your qualifications, then who needs her?

- Right?
- Right.

- All right.
- All right.

- How do you feel?
- I feel good.

Do you? All right,
now stop fucking around and go get her.

Hey, Rat.

You gotta ace that jacket.

- Yeah?
- Yeah.

All right. That's cool. You look good.

All right? Go get her, buddy.

1.10, and you get five cents back.

Thanks.

- Hi. Don't I know you from biology class?
- Yeah.

What can I do for you?

Yeah, I had a couple of questions.

I was curious, what do you do
with the jackets that people leave here?

We keep 'em.

- You keep 'em?
- In case you come back.

- You can look through it if you want.
- No, that's cool. I ̶̶

Would take too long
to look through all that stuff.

I'll just ̶̶ I'll pick up a new one.

What was your other question?

Oh, uh, my other question is...

can I have your phone number
so I can ask you out sometime?

Do you have a pen? This one's out of ink.

Yeah.

Stacy.

Nice to meet you, Stacy.
My name is Mark Ratner.

I've gotta ̶̶ I've gotta go.

Lisa, I have something to tell you.

Look, I'm a senior now.

I'm a single, successful guy.

And I've got to be fair to myself.

Lisa...

I think I need my freedom.

Oh, don't do that.

- Please. Please, don't ̶̶
- Brad, can you cover me on register two?

Okay.

- May I help you?
- Uh, yes.

This is not the best breakfast I ever ate,
and I'd like my money back.

Uh, okay, I believe you have
to fill out a form for that.

Uh, no, I'd like my money back now.

I'm sorry. It doesn't work that way.

You see, I have to fill out a form, and,
well, you ate most of it already, so...

You see that sign?

It says 100% guaranteed.

You know what the meaning of guarantee is?

- Do they teach you that here?
- Sir, if you just wait a minute...

Look, just put your little hand
back in the cash register

and give me my $2.75 back, please, Brad.

Sir, if you just give me a minute,
I'll find the forms,

I'll take care of everything.

I don't have a minute.
You've made me late enough.

I am so tired
of dealing with incompetence.

It says 100% guaranteed, you moron.

Mister, if you don't shut up,
I'm gonna kick 100% of your ass!

Uh, is there a problem here?

Can I help you, sir?

You bet you have a problem.

Your employee here used profanity
and threatened me with violence.

I'm surprised. I eat here all the time and
usually have good service, until today.

All I wanted was my money back
on this breakfast.

It was a little undercooked.

And he threatens me with violence.

- Now, I'm gonna call your supervisor ̶̶
- Uh...

I can take care of it.

Mr. Hamilton, did you threaten
this customer or use profanity in any way?

Uh... What?

He insulted me first.
He called me a moron, Dennis.

Answer me. Did you threaten this customer
or use profanity in any way?

- Yes.
- You're fired.

I'm very sorry, sir.

I'll refund your money right now.

Hope you won't hold this against us.

You know how these young kids are
these days.

Here we are. Perhaps another breakfast?

I hope you had a hell of a piss, Arnold!

The world's finest surfers showed up today

to do battle with what's turned out to be
the biggest wave to hit this coast

since 1946.

Hello, everybody. I'm Stu Nahan,
and I'd like you to meet this young man.

His name, Jeff Spicoli.
And, Jeff, congratulations to you.

Things looked kind of rough
out there today.

Well, I'll tell you, Stu,
I did battle some humongous waves.

But, you know,
just like I told the guy on ABC,

danger is my business.

You know, a lot of people expected
maybe Mark "Cutback" Davis

or Bob "Jungle Death" Gerrard
would take the honors this year.

Those guys are fags!

That's fantastic.
Let me ask you a question.

When you get out there,
do you ever fear for your life?

Well, Stu, I'll tell you,
surfing's not a sport.

It's a way of life. It's no hobby.

It's a way of looking at that wave
and saying, "Hey bud, let's party."

- Where'd you get this jacket?
- I got this from the network.

Let me ask you a question.
What's next for Jeff Spicoli?

Headed over to the Australian
and the Hawaiian Internationals.

Then me and Mick are gonna wing on
over to London and jam with the Stones.

You guys are invited too.

Jeff. Jeff.

Jeff!

- Dad says you have to get up.
- Leave me alone.

Dad says you're gonna be late again,
you butthole.

Leave me alone!

Dad says you're gonna be late again,
you booger.

Dad! Jeff threw a snorkel at me!

We just wanna say
that we're not Spirit Bunnies anymore.

We always hated that name.

- It bugged the heck out of Dina and me.
- It's just such a put-down.

Really.

We know you've got a lot of spirit,
everybody, right?

And we're gonna destroy Lincoln next week!
All right?

You know, it takes a lot of courage
to get up here

and do something that
you know people will make fun of.

Yeah.

Man. I'm never gonna talk
to those guys again.

I'm the one who got Arnold and Dave
their jobs there in the first place.

If you'd apologize to Dennis,
I'm sure he'd take you back.

Fuck Dennis Taylor.

I'm not gonna apologize to that wimp.

I'm just glad we're still together.

Because a lot's happened,
and I really need you this year.

Look, Brad, I've been trying
to think of a way to tell you this.

We're almost out of school.

It's our last year.

And I think we owe it to ourselves
to be free.

To go out with other people.

I still wanna be friends.

Look, what am I gonna say to her
once we get in the car?

It's no problem, Rat.

What you need
is my special five-point plan.

Come on, Damone. I need real help here.

What do you mean?

Hey! Men have died trying to obtain
this valuable information, you know.

But I'll give it to you for free.

Okay, okay. What's your five-point plan?

All right. Now, pay attention.

First of all, Rat, you never let on
how much you like a girl.

Oh, Debbie. Hi.

Two, you always call the shots.

Kiss me. You won't regret it.

Now, three, act like wherever you are,
that's the place to be.

Isn't this great?

Four...

when ordering food, you find out what
she wants, then order for the both of you.

It's a classy move.

Uh, the lady will have the linguine in
white clam sauce and a Coke with no ice.

And five ̶̶
Now, this is most important, Rat ̶̶

When it comes down to making out,

whenever possible,

put on side one of Led Zeppelin IV.

This is a nice car.

- Yeah, it's my sister's.
- Yeah?

- Do you have Mrs. George for English?
- Yeah. Yeah, she's pretty good.

Yeah, she is pretty good.

Have you decided?

Um...

Yeah. I'll have the, uh, knockwurst.

Excellent.

You work at Cinema 4, right?

That must be great.

You get to see all those free movies,
you get free popcorn...

Are you okay?

Yeah, I'm fine.

Would you mind if I excuse myself
for a moment?

Oh, no. Go ahead.

Are you ready to order here?

- She will have the knockwurst.
- Mmm. And you?

I'll have the same.

Anything to drink?

- Coke.
- Two Cokes.

Okay. Thank you.

- I'll be right back.
- Okay.

- Hello?
- Mike, it's Mark.

Hey, what happened to your date?

It's happening right now.

Everything's fine. Except...

I left my wallet at home.

Why don't you go home and get it?

No, I can't. I'm here.
The food's coming and everything.

Look, would you do me a favor?

Just borrow your mom's car,
drive to my house,

get my wallet and bring it back here.

Hello? Mike?

Mike?

I'm really kind of busy, Rat.

Look, just do me this one favor.

I swear, I won't ask you for anything
again in this lifetime or any other,

but just please do this for me.

All right. But you owe me for this one.

Okay, thanks. Thanks a lot. Thanks.

Hey, Beaver, are you all right?

What happened?

Are you sure there's nothing else
I can bring you?

Do you want another Coke?

Um, okay.

Two more Cokes.

- Hey, Mark! Is that you?
- Mike!

- Yeah. Hi. You come here?
- Yeah, I come for the strudel. It's great.

Hey, listen, I found your wallet
the other day. Want it back?

Oh, wow. Yeah.
I was looking for this.

Oh, Mike, you don't know Stacy Hamilton.

Stacy, this is Mike Damone.

- Hi.
- Hi.

Nice to meet you.

See you later.

Right. Gotta be going.
See you later.

You wanna go?

Um, yeah.

I had a really nice time tonight.

Oh, me too.

I'm real sorry someone broke in
and stole your tape deck.

Never would have thought it would have
happened at such a fancy place.

I know.

You wanna come in for a sec?

- Okay. Sure.
- Good.

Where's your brother?

He's out tonight with some friends.

- Can I get you something to drink?
- No, no. That's ̶̶ That's okay.

Oh.

Well, do you mind if I change?

No.

Okay. Could you get this for me?
It always sticks.

Thanks.

Where are your parents?

My parents are out of town
for the weekend.

Brad and I are watching the house.

- This is a really nice picture of you.
- Thanks.

You can come in my room if you want.

So, what you wanna do?

I don't know.

Um...

You wanna look at a photo album?

I keep a lot of pictures, you know?
From when I grew up and stuff.

- It's kinda stupid.
- Sure. Yeah.

- Yeah?
- Mm-hmm.

Great.

Photographs.

This is one that Brad took.
It's, like, double image type thing.

You know?
It's like a mirror, but it looks ̶̶

This is me being stupid. Um...

This is my dog, Gypsy, and my cat, Tullio.

And they're dead now.

Remember him? Mr. Deegan?

You had Deegan?

- He always wore the same suit.
- The same suit.

- He must have had 500 of those suits.
- Oh, he was terrible.

No, I think it was one.

Hey, you know,
I just thought of something.

Oh?

My sister is crazy
when it comes to her car.

- It's gotta be back by 11:00.
- Do you wanna call her?

No, look, I ̶̶

She's ̶̶ She gets crazy. I mean, that's ̶̶
Her car is her baby.

I ̶̶ I'd better be going.

- Yeah?
- I'll call you.

Well, I'll see you in class, okay?

Bye.

Mark Ratner doesn't like me.

Mark Ratner doesn't like you?
You're crazy.

No. He shows absolutely no interest in me.

Well, Stace, Mark Ratner
is definitely somebody

that you would have to make
the first move with.

Linda, I did.

I made the first move.
I made the second move.

I made a complete jerk out of myself
is what I did.

Stace, what do you care about
Mark Ratner for?

I mean, he's a 16-year-old usher
in the movie theater.

You have dated older guys,

you work at the best food stand
in the mall,

and you are a close
personal friend of mine.

Yeah.

But I was really beginning to like him.

Yeah, well, if that's true,
you better find somebody else fast.

- Seen the new Playboy?
- Good?

- Bo Derek's tits.
- All right.

I like sex.

People on ludes should not drive.

Hey. Hey, this here's my brother's car.

- You said he was out of town.
- And he is.

All right. Then don't hassle it.

Hey, you're crazy, Spicoli.
That light was red.

It was yellow a minute ago. I'm sure.

Hey, you gonna scratch my brother's car.

No, I'm not.

Now, look. I'm driving. You navigate.

Where is this party?

Hey, make a right. Right here.

Here! Here! H ̶̶

My brother's gonna kill us.

He's gonna kill us.

He's gonna kill you and he's
gonna kill me. He's gonna kill us.

Hey, man, just be glad
I had fast reflexes.

- My brother's gonna shit!
- Make up your mind, dude.

Is he gonna shit or is he gonna kill us?

First he's gonna shit,
then he's gonna kill us.

Relax. All right?

My old man, he's a television repairman.
He's got this ultimate set of tools.

I can fix it.

You can't fix this car, Spicoli.

I can fix it.

Hey!

- I'm giving you $50 ̶̶
- No, no.

That means if you win, I give you $25.

If I win, you give me five.

- Can't lose.
- All right.

All right, I'll put you down for five.

Don't forget about the 14-point spread.

Fourteen-point ̶̶

I don't believe those guys
at Lincoln did this to Jefferson's car.

Yeah, they totaled that bastard.
Can't believe it.

Jefferson's gonna really make Lincoln
pay for this.

He's gonna beat the crap out of them.

That guy's gonna totally destroy 'em.
Annihilate. You know what I mean?

Shit. He is pissed off.

- Holy shit.
- Hut! Hut!

Walk in here.

Brought down again
by 33, Charles Jefferson.

Hit by Jefferson.

Crushed by Jefferson.

And again by Jefferson.

Jefferson. Jefferson.

Jefferson.

Stretcher, come on.

Again, Jefferson.

Fight, Ridgemont!

Five, four, three, two, one.

There's nothing to eat here.

What do you mean,
there's nothing to eat here?

Take a look.
There's nothing that I can eat here.

Get a trout dog.

Forget it. Do you have any fish here
that isn't breaded?

It's all prepared the same way.

- Forget it.
- Get a Whaler.

- No!
- How about a Clamwich?

You ever hear the word "blemish"?
You want me to eat something deep-fried?

- Let's get out of here.
- Let's go. Place is horrible.

Thank you. Come again.
And have a nice day.

I sent a letter to Doug today.

Can't wait till he gets out here.

What's Doug doing in Chicago?

He works for the airline. You'll meet him.

Oh, Linda, you have to do this.

- What?
- "Rate Your Mate."

- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah.

- Okay?
- Let me test Doug.

Okay.

"The most satisfactory lovemaking occurs

A: When your mate climaxes first.
B: You climax first.

- "C: You and your mate climax together."
- Climax together.

This is gonna be great, Rat.

It's, like, the highlight of their day.

Maybe we ought to call first.
I don't know about dropping in like ̶̶

What are you, kidding?
We're gonna surprise 'em.

Look, just fix your collar. All right?

Relax. Just be cool.

Attitude, remember?

- Where'd you get that? Out of the hamper?
- Hey, come on. This is clean.

Look, Rat, it's like riding a bike.
You fall off, you get right back on.

You mess up a date? Do it again.

- Do you always climax with Doug?
- Yes.

I think so.

He's no high school boy.

Hey.

Came over to help you
with your math homework.

Figured you could use it
on such a hot day.

Don't worry. They're gonna let us in.

Okay.

But you have to promise me you're gonna
leave as soon as my mother gets home.

Okay.

- Linda, this is Mike and Mark.
- Great.

- Hi.
- Hi.

- How you doing?
- Good.

- Water looks great.
- Yeah.

Check it out.

It's cold.

What?

Very funny. Very funny.

Lin, come in!

Hey, Linda, I'll judge your dive.
I used to be a champion myself, you know.

Mom know you have company?

It's just Mark and Mike from school.

Hi.

- How you doing?
- Hi, Linda.

Hi, Brad.

Ow!

Uh, could you keep it down?

- I have some work to do inside.
- Okay.

Who's his tailor?

God, he hardly even talks anymore.

Yeah, I know. He hates wearing a uniform.

Hey, Rat, show 'em how
you can stand up underwater.

Come on.

- Watch out, Rat.
- Hey, Damone, what are you doing?

- Leave me alone.
- Watch out, Rat. Here comes a shark.

All right, Damone, you're gonna get it.

Hi, Brad.

You know how cute
I always thought you were.

Stacy, do you have any Q-tips?
I've got water in my ears.

I don't know. Check in the house.

Uh, wait just a minute!

Doesn't anybody fucking knock anymore?

Now, in 1898, Spain owned Cuba outright.

Think about it.

Cuba owned by a disorganized parliament
over 4,000 miles away.

Cubans were in a constant ̶̶

Cubans were in a constant state of revolt.

In 1904, the United States decided to
throw a little weight around...

...and, uh...

- Who is it?
- Mr. Pizza Guy.

- Again?
- Mr. Pizza Guy, sir.

Who ordered the double cheese and sausage?

Right here, dude.

For you, dude.

Am I hallucinating here?

Just what in the hell
do you think you are doing?

Learning about Cuba and having some food.

Mr. Spicoli,
you're on dangerous ground here.

You're causing a major disturbance
on my time.

I've been thinking about this, Mr. Hand.

If I'm here and you're here,
doesn't that make it our time?

And certainly there's nothing wrong
with a little feast on our time.

You're absolutely right, Mr. Spicoli.

It is our time.

Yours, mine, and everyone else's
in this room.

But it is my class.

- Hamilton. Brandt. Cornfeld.
- Up front.

Mr. Spicoli has been kind enough
to bring us a snack.

Uh, be my guest.

Help yourselves. Get a good one.

Double cheese.

Mike. Mike.

- Hi.
- Hi.

- How you doing?
- Good. How are you?

Ugh, I hate walking.
I have to walk every day.

- Hello.
- It's such a drag.

Why don't you get a ride with somebody?

Sometimes I get a ride with my brother.

But, uh, he works in the mornings,
and then he drives himself to school.

What a guy.

Listen, uh, Mark Ratner really likes you.

Do you like him?

Mark is really nice.

But I think I like you.

Well, uh... this is me.

- You have any ice tea?
- Yeah, sure.

Come on in.

So the annuals are coming out pretty soon.

You gonna get one?

I don't know.

Oh, come on.

Aren't you curious to see
how your picture turned out?

- I know what I look like.
- Yeah, I know.

But it's nice to have pictures
of your friends and stuff, you know?

I don't know, maybe, you know?
It's no big deal.

I probably will.

- Must be nice having a pool.
- You wanna go swimming?

- Yeah, sure. I don't mind.
- I'm gonna go change, okay?

- Yeah.
- Okay, good.

Hey, this is great ice tea.

- Come on.
- Huh?

Brad keeps his stuff in the changing room.

This is nice.

- Yeah?
- Yeah.

These'll fit you.

You're really a good kisser.

Yeah?

So are you.

You wanna take off your clothes, Mike?

You first.

Both of us at the same time.

Okay.

M-Mike! Mike!

Are you okay?

I think I came.

Didn't you feel it?

Yeah, I guess I did.

I gotta go, Stacy. I've really gotta go.

See ya.

Bye.

Linda, how long does Doug take?

- Doug takes forever.
- Come on.

He takes, um, like 20 to 30 minutes.

I thought you said he took
30 to 40 minutes.

Yeah, that's right. I'm sorry.
I meant 30 to 40 minutes.

Why? How long did Damone take?

Damone took, um, 15 to 20 minutes.

That's not bad.
That's not bad for a high school boy.

- Mike. Hi.
- Hi.

- God, I haven't seen you for a while.
- Yeah.

I'm kind of in a hurry.
I got a lot of stuff I gotta do.

Yeah, I'm in a hurry too. I just thought
I'd say hi to you.

Hi.

Hamilton, I'll take over the fryer
for a while.

Those boys at IBM ordered a whole stack
of those Catch of the Day boxes.

I told them that you would personally
deliver them within the hour.

Aye, aye, sir.

Hamilton, come over here.

What are you doing?

I'm changing.

But you took off
your Captain Hook uniform.

Well, I thought I'd put my street clothes
on for the drive over to IBM.

The uniform's kind of uncomfortable.

Hamilton, you're going over there

as a representative
of Captain Hook Fish and Chips.

Part of our image,
part of our appeal, is that uniform.

You know that.

You really want me
to put this stuff back on?

Yes, I do. Show a little pride.

Aye, aye, sir.

Dina, what ̶̶ Can you ̶̶
Can you honestly tell me that you forgot?

Forgot the magnetism of Robin Zander
or the charisma of Rick Nielsen?

That's kids' stuff.

Kids' stuff? How about the tunes?

♪ I want you to want me ♪

♪ The dream police ♪

♪ Your momma's all right ♪

♪ Your daddy's all right ♪

♪ They just seem a little bit weird
Surrender ♪

Mike? Mike?

Can I talk to you for a sec?

Well, now, Stacy, I ̶̶ I'm doing business.

Call me tonight, all right?

No. I ̶̶ I gotta talk to you now. Okay?

Don't go away.

"Lookout."

I hope this is important, you know,
because I could be blowing a big deal.

Mike, I just ̶̶

I just want you to know that I'm pregnant.

How do you know it's mine?
I mean, we only did it once.

I haven't been with anybody else.
I know it's yours.

Jesus.

I mean, it was your idea.
You wanted to do it. I ̶̶

You wanted it more than I did.

No. Take that back.

All right. All right. I take it back.

Look, we gotta do something about it.
I mean, uh, we gotta get an abortion.

My brother Art
got his girlfriend one once.

It's simple. I mean, it's no big deal.

Yeah. I ̶̶ I got that planned.

Um, it's gonna cost $150
at the free clinic.

Doesn't sound free to me.

I suppose you want me to pay for it.

Half, okay?

And a ride to the clinic?

Seventy-five dollars and a ride.

Okay. Yeah.

Okay. Thanks.

Thank you.

Hey, Rick.
Listen, I need that $50 you owe me.

Don't have it.

Yeah, I ̶̶ I know times are tight, man.
But I really need it.

- I don't have it right now.
- Hey, come on.

When you needed the tickets,
I got 'em for you, right?

So close to the stage
you probably scared the band.

I'm not the Bank of America.

I know you're not the Bank of America,
man, but I need my $50.

- How about Thursday?
- Thursday's too late.

I need it tonight.

Can't give you what I don't have.

All right, look,
just forget about it, all right?

All right. For ̶̶
I'll get it from you Thursday, okay?

All right. See you.

Shit.

Is Mike there? This is Stacy.

Uh, hold on, please.

Uh, Stacy, he says he's helping
his father out in the garage.

He'll call you later.

Brad!

Brad, wait a second.

Yeah, this is it.
We're just going bowling.

- Okay.
- Thanks a lot.

- See you later.
- Okay.

How we doing in here?
Debbie, you ready to leave?

Yes. Thank you.

Stacy. I can't let you go
unless you have a ride home.

Oh, I told my boyfriend
to meet me downstairs.

Okay.

Thanks.

Brad.

Since when do you go bowling anyway?

Okay, Brad, please don't tell Mom and Dad.

Come on.

Who did it?

- You're not gonna tell me, are you?
- No.

Okay. It'll just be your secret.

Yeah.

- You all right?
- Yeah.

Come on.

- You hungry?
- Yeah.

I told you to tell Mike to pay for it.
Why didn't you tell him?

Linda, he didn't show up.

That little prick!

I called his house,

and his mother told me that he was
in the garage, helping his father.

Well, Mike Damone's
a no-brain little prick, Stacy.

I'm not gonna let him get away with this.

Linda, please don't do anything.

I don't even like the guy.

Stacy, he's not a guy.
He's a little prick.

Shit. Shit.

Hi, Mikey. Ooh.

Hi, Damone.

Damone, what went on
between you and Stacy?

Let me tell you something, Rat.
I mean, sometimes girls just go haywire.

I mean, it happened a month ago.

I've been trying to think
of a way to tell you ever since.

We were out... messing around,
and something happened.

But it's over.

I mean, it's no big deal.
I never even called her again.

If you ask me, Rat,
she's a very aggressive girl.

You understand what I'm saying?

No, I don't understand.

She never really was your girlfriend, Rat.

Hey, fuck you, Damone.

There are a lot of girls out there.
And you have to mess around with Stacy?

I mean, what do you got to prove, anyway?

I'm sorry.

Look, I always stick up for you.

Whenever people say,
"Ah, that Damone, he's a loudmouth" ̶̶

and they say that a lot ̶̶

I always say,
"Hey, you just don't know Damone."

When they call you an idiot,

I say, "Hey, Damone's not an idiot.
You just don't know him."

Well, you know something, man?
Maybe they do know you pretty good.

Maybe I'm just finding out now.

Get lost.

You wanna do something about it, Rat?

Come on. You wanna do something
about it? Come on.

- Come on, you little wuss!
- Okay, let's go, man.

- I'll break your fucking head open.
- I'm ready. Do something.

- Keep talking, man. Keep talking!
- Hey, knock this crap off!

Take it somewhere else.

Not in my gym, buddy.

Woke up in a great mood,
and I don't know what the hell happened.

Come on, come on. Hurry up. Hurry up.

All right, now,
today we're going to explore

how this hospital preserves human life.

We'll be visiting
every floor, every level,

where these fine doctors and nurses
take care of us in life and in death.

Over 30 children
are delivered here each day.

Dr. Kramer to the nurses' station.

- Good morning, Doctor.
- Hi.

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