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1
00:00:04,805 --> 00:00:06,640
HARRIETTE.
2
00:00:08,042 --> 00:00:10,411
OH, HARRIETTE.
3
00:00:11,479 --> 00:00:13,047
HARRIETTE!
4
00:00:16,984 --> 00:00:19,387
I CAN'T FIND MY SHOES.
5
00:00:19,453 --> 00:00:22,556
THOSE THINGS ON YOUR FEET
LOOK SHOELIKE.
6
00:00:23,924 --> 00:00:25,893
NOT THESE.
MY RED FLATS.
7
00:00:25,959 --> 00:00:27,395
LAURA, HAVE YOU
SEEN THEM?
8
00:00:27,461 --> 00:00:28,762
NOPE. SORRY.
9
00:00:28,829 --> 00:00:30,231
I BET RACHEL
HAS THEM.
10
00:00:30,298 --> 00:00:33,234
SHE'S BEEN BORROWING MY STUFF
SINCE HIGH SCHOOL.
11
00:00:33,301 --> 00:00:37,037
WE'RE LATE.
CAN WE PLEASE GO?
12
00:00:37,105 --> 00:00:40,040
THIS HAS BEEN GOING ON
FOR 20 YEARS.
13
00:00:40,108 --> 00:00:43,177
WHO DOES SHE THINK WE ARE,
THE DOUBLEMINT TWINS?
14
00:00:46,547 --> 00:00:47,715
LAURA...
15
00:00:47,781 --> 00:00:51,051
HAVE YOU SEEN MY RED JACKET
WITH THE BEADS?
16
00:00:51,119 --> 00:00:53,287
NOPE. SORRY.
17
00:00:53,354 --> 00:00:55,689
I'LL BET HARRIETTE
TOOK IT.
18
00:00:55,756 --> 00:00:58,025
SHE'S BEEN BORROWING
MY STUFF SINCE HIGH SCHOOL.
19
00:00:58,092 --> 00:00:59,427
MAKE ME SICK.
20
00:00:59,493 --> 00:01:01,162
MY STUFF'S MY STUFF.
IT'S NOT HER STUFF.
21
00:01:01,229 --> 00:01:05,199
THAT'S WHY THEY
CALL IT MY STUFF.
22
00:01:14,074 --> 00:01:16,310
I THOUGHT THEY'D
NEVER LEAVE.
23
00:01:16,377 --> 00:01:18,679
WELL, I'M
OUT OF HERE.
24
00:01:22,015 --> 00:01:24,485
HEY! THAT'S MY PURSE.
25
00:01:24,552 --> 00:01:26,420
WHOOPS! LATER...
26
00:01:37,165 --> 00:01:39,300
* IT'S A RARE CONDITION *
27
00:01:39,367 --> 00:01:40,734
* IN THIS DAY AND AGE *
28
00:01:40,801 --> 00:01:43,871
* TO READ ANY GOOD NEWS
ON THE NEWSPAPER PAGE *
29
00:01:43,937 --> 00:01:47,575
* AND LOVE AND TRADITION
OF THE GRAND DESIGN *
30
00:01:47,641 --> 00:01:51,979
* SOME PEOPLE SAY
IS EVEN HARDER TO FIND *
31
00:01:52,045 --> 00:01:55,349
* WELL, THEN, THERE MUST BE
SOME MAGIC CLUE *
32
00:01:55,416 --> 00:01:59,487
* INSIDE THESE GENTLE WALLS *
33
00:01:59,553 --> 00:02:03,191
* 'CAUSE ALL I SEE
IS A TOWER OF DREAMS *
34
00:02:03,257 --> 00:02:06,760
* REAL LOVE BURSTIN'
OUT OF EVERY SEAM *
35
00:02:07,861 --> 00:02:10,998
* AS DAYS GO BY *
36
00:02:11,064 --> 00:02:14,902
* WE'RE GONNA FILL
OUR HOUSE WITH HAPPINESS *
37
00:02:14,968 --> 00:02:17,871
* THE MOON MAY CRY *
38
00:02:17,938 --> 00:02:21,509
* WE'RE GONNA SMOTHER THE BLUES
WITH TENDERNESS *
39
00:02:21,575 --> 00:02:25,112
* AS DAYS GO BY *
40
00:02:25,179 --> 00:02:28,482
* THERE'S ROOM FOR YOU,
ROOM FOR ME *
41
00:02:28,549 --> 00:02:31,652
* FOR GENTLE HEARTS
AN OPPORTUNITY *
42
00:02:32,953 --> 00:02:36,156
* AS DAYS GO BY *
43
00:02:36,224 --> 00:02:39,760
* IT'S THE BIGGER LOVE
OF THE FAMILY *
44
00:03:00,914 --> 00:03:03,917
RICHIE, WHY ARE YOU
PLAYING WITH YOUR FOOD?
45
00:03:03,984 --> 00:03:06,119
* THEY SAY I'M CRAZY *
46
00:03:06,186 --> 00:03:07,888
* I CAN DO
WHAT I WANNA DO *
47
00:03:07,955 --> 00:03:09,823
* IT'S MY PREROGATIVE *
48
00:03:14,428 --> 00:03:17,998
SORRY. WE'VE BEEN
LISTENING TO BOBBY BROWN.
49
00:03:18,065 --> 00:03:19,733
WHAT'S PREROGATIVE MEAN?
50
00:03:19,800 --> 00:03:23,203
IT MEANS...DON'T
PLAY WITH YOUR FOOD.
51
00:03:27,341 --> 00:03:30,544
LAURA, HOW WAS
CAREER DAY?
52
00:03:30,611 --> 00:03:32,613
MY GRADES
ARE GOOD ENOUGH
53
00:03:32,680 --> 00:03:34,915
TO GET INTO
HARVARD LAW SCHOOL.
54
00:03:34,982 --> 00:03:35,649
HARVARD!
55
00:03:35,716 --> 00:03:37,050
THAT'S MY GIRL.
56
00:03:37,117 --> 00:03:40,087
AH, JUST HOW MUCH IS IT TO GO TO
HARVARD LAW SCHOOL THESE DAYS?
57
00:03:40,153 --> 00:03:42,390
SIXTEEN THOUSAND
DOLLARS A YEAR.
58
00:03:42,456 --> 00:03:44,525
OOH! OOH! MM-HMM.
59
00:03:44,592 --> 00:03:48,796
SOMEBODY GET THE SMELLIN' SALT.
60
00:03:48,862 --> 00:03:51,098
OF COURSE YOU'D SAVE A LOT
IF I GOT A SCHOLARSHIP.
61
00:03:51,164 --> 00:03:53,967
WHY ARE YOU WASTING
YOUR TIME EATIN'? GO STUDY.
62
00:03:56,203 --> 00:03:58,439
EDWARD,
WHAT ABOUT YOU?
63
00:03:58,506 --> 00:04:00,708
WHAT ARE YOUR PLANS
FOR THE FUTURE?
64
00:04:00,774 --> 00:04:02,242
ROCK STAR.
65
00:04:05,245 --> 00:04:08,148
THAT'S IT?
THAT'S YOUR PLAN?
66
00:04:08,215 --> 00:04:09,683
SON, IT MIGHT BE WISE
67
00:04:09,750 --> 00:04:12,920
TO HAVE SOMETHING ELSE
TO FALL BACK ON.
68
00:04:12,986 --> 00:04:14,154
NO PROBLEM, DAD.
69
00:04:14,221 --> 00:04:16,624
I CAN BE A MODEL.
70
00:04:17,825 --> 00:04:20,994
ARE YOU GOING TO BE
THE BEFORE OR THE AFTER?
71
00:04:28,736 --> 00:04:31,705
HEY, DAD.
72
00:04:31,772 --> 00:04:33,607
I THOUGHT YOU WERE
GOING TO THE MOVIES.
73
00:04:33,674 --> 00:04:34,508
I WAS,
74
00:04:34,575 --> 00:04:37,311
BUT JOLENE
RAN OUT OF MONEY.
75
00:04:39,713 --> 00:04:40,781
WOMEN.
76
00:04:40,848 --> 00:04:42,450
YEAH.
77
00:04:42,516 --> 00:04:45,819
EDWARD, I THINK IT'S TIME
TO HAVE OUR LITTLE TALK.
78
00:04:45,886 --> 00:04:49,256
OH, NO! DAD...IS THIS
PHASE TWO OF
79
00:04:49,323 --> 00:04:50,824
"WHAT I'LL DO
IN THE FUTURE"?
80
00:04:50,891 --> 00:04:52,159
YES, EDWARD.
81
00:04:52,225 --> 00:04:54,595
I SHOULD'VE SPRUNG
FOR THE MOVIE.
82
00:04:59,032 --> 00:05:00,401
SON...
83
00:05:00,468 --> 00:05:03,804
SOMETIMES IN LIFE,
WE AGONIZE OVER DECISIONS
84
00:05:03,871 --> 00:05:04,805
AND THEN LATER ON
85
00:05:04,872 --> 00:05:07,575
REALIZE THEY WEREN'T
ALL THAT IMPORTANT.
86
00:05:07,641 --> 00:05:10,043
BUT, EDWARD,
CHOOSING A CAREER
87
00:05:10,110 --> 00:05:11,579
IS IMPORTANT.
88
00:05:11,645 --> 00:05:13,881
NOW, ASIDE
FROM A ROCK STAR--
89
00:05:13,947 --> 00:05:15,483
OR MODEL.
90
00:05:15,549 --> 00:05:16,950
OR MODEL...
91
00:05:18,719 --> 00:05:21,088
WHAT ELSE WOULD YOU
LIKE TO BE?
92
00:05:21,154 --> 00:05:22,656
I HONESTLY DON'T KNOW.
93
00:05:22,723 --> 00:05:24,992
I MEAN, I THOUGHT
ABOUT IT A LOT.
94
00:05:25,058 --> 00:05:27,395
I THOUGHT AND THOUGHT
95
00:05:27,461 --> 00:05:30,163
AND THOUGHT
UNTIL MY HEAD HURT.
96
00:05:30,230 --> 00:05:32,766
LET ME ASK YOU THIS.
97
00:05:34,301 --> 00:05:36,203
ARE YOU OPEN TO
CAREER SUGGESTIONS?
98
00:05:36,269 --> 00:05:38,872
SURE. WHAT DO YOU GOT?
99
00:05:38,939 --> 00:05:41,809
HAVE YOU EVER THOUGHT
ABOUT BEING A POLICEMAN?
100
00:05:48,215 --> 00:05:50,818
I MEAN, NOT REALLY.
101
00:05:52,586 --> 00:05:56,557
EDWARD, POLICE WORK
IS SUBSTANTIAL AND SATISFYING.
102
00:05:56,624 --> 00:05:58,659
IT'S A JOB
YOU CAN BE PROUD OF.
103
00:05:58,726 --> 00:06:00,694
IT'S ALSO
A FAMILY TRADITION.
104
00:06:00,761 --> 00:06:04,832
ME. MY FATHER.
AND MAYBE NOW YOU.
105
00:06:04,898 --> 00:06:06,233
SON, THINK ABOUT IT.
106
00:06:06,299 --> 00:06:07,901
DON'T MAKE
YOUR HEAD HURT,
107
00:06:07,968 --> 00:06:10,003
BUT THINK ABOUT IT.
108
00:06:10,070 --> 00:06:11,705
ALRIGHT.
109
00:06:11,772 --> 00:06:12,773
HEY.
110
00:06:12,840 --> 00:06:15,909
MY BOSS STARTED
A POLICE RIDE-ALONG PROGRAM.
111
00:06:15,976 --> 00:06:17,210
YOU CAN CHECK OUT
112
00:06:17,277 --> 00:06:19,046
THE DAY IN THE LIFE
OF A COP.
113
00:06:19,112 --> 00:06:21,014
WHAT DO YOU SAY?
114
00:06:21,081 --> 00:06:22,450
I SAID
I'D THINK ABOUT IT.
115
00:06:22,516 --> 00:06:24,251
I'LL SAVE YOU TIME.
116
00:06:24,317 --> 00:06:25,553
YOU'RE GOING.
117
00:06:37,865 --> 00:06:41,535
WELL, MURTAGH,
THIS IS IT, THE OLD HOMESTEAD.
118
00:06:43,737 --> 00:06:46,840
SERGEANT, THIS IS
A FINE HOUSE.
119
00:06:48,909 --> 00:06:50,644
COP'S HOUSE.
120
00:06:53,246 --> 00:06:54,482
THANK YOU, SIR.
121
00:06:54,548 --> 00:06:57,417
I'M HONORED THAT
YOU WANT TO MEET MY SON.
122
00:06:57,485 --> 00:06:59,553
IN THIS
CRIME-PLAGUED SOCIETY,
123
00:06:59,620 --> 00:07:01,789
WE NEED EVERY GOOD MAN
WE CAN GET.
124
00:07:01,855 --> 00:07:04,725
IF YOUR SON WANTS TO
JOIN THE BATTLE,
125
00:07:04,792 --> 00:07:06,560
I WANT TO
SHAKE HIS HAND.
126
00:07:06,627 --> 00:07:09,463
I'M SURE
HE'LL BE THRILLED.
127
00:07:09,530 --> 00:07:11,965
YOU KNOW,
MY SON'S A COP.
128
00:07:12,032 --> 00:07:13,667
MY DAUGHTER, TOO.
129
00:07:14,602 --> 00:07:17,505
MY DOG'S IN
THE CANINE CORPS.
130
00:07:20,574 --> 00:07:22,510
WHAT ABOUT YOUR WIFE?
131
00:07:22,576 --> 00:07:24,111
SHE LEFT ME.
132
00:07:28,015 --> 00:07:29,016
WOMEN.
133
00:07:30,383 --> 00:07:32,085
YEAH.
134
00:07:36,690 --> 00:07:39,326
HONEST, EDDO.
I'M TELLING THE TRUTH.
135
00:07:39,392 --> 00:07:41,529
IT'S A SCIENTIFIC
FACT.
136
00:07:41,595 --> 00:07:45,032
RATS JUST
CAN'T VOMIT.
137
00:07:45,098 --> 00:07:47,868
STEVE! WHO CARES?
138
00:07:47,935 --> 00:07:51,471
A GUY SITTING IN FRONT OF A RAT
ON A ROLLER-COASTER.
139
00:07:52,673 --> 00:07:55,342
EDWARD, ALL SET
FOR THE RIDE-ALONG?
140
00:07:55,408 --> 00:07:58,679
I'M SORRY, DAD.
I CAN'T GO.
141
00:07:58,746 --> 00:08:00,814
WH--
142
00:08:00,881 --> 00:08:02,215
EXCUSE ME.
143
00:08:09,523 --> 00:08:10,724
HI.
144
00:08:13,326 --> 00:08:15,095
EVER FRISK A WOMAN?
145
00:08:17,430 --> 00:08:19,366
WHAT DO YOU MEAN,
YOU CAN'T GO?
146
00:08:19,432 --> 00:08:22,435
I HAVE AN APPOINTMENT
WITH THE MODELING AGENCY.
147
00:08:22,502 --> 00:08:23,436
THEY'RE LOOKING
FOR NEW CLIENTS.
148
00:08:23,503 --> 00:08:26,206
IT'S AN INCREDIBLE OPPORTUNITY.
149
00:08:26,273 --> 00:08:28,008
MODELING?
150
00:08:28,075 --> 00:08:29,242
YEAH.
151
00:08:29,309 --> 00:08:30,744
ISN'T IT GREAT?
152
00:08:30,811 --> 00:08:34,715
EDWARD, YOU HAVE REALLY
LET ME DOWN THIS TIME.
153
00:08:36,550 --> 00:08:40,621
I AM VERY, VERY
DISAPPOINTED IN YOU.
154
00:08:45,626 --> 00:08:47,895
THIS DOG HAS
QUITE A SMILE.
155
00:08:47,961 --> 00:08:51,498
YEAH, GOOD OLD
BLOOD FANG.
156
00:08:51,565 --> 00:08:53,701
HE'D LAY DOWN
HIS LIFE FOR ME.
157
00:08:53,767 --> 00:08:56,169
HOW'D YOU TRAIN HIM
TO HOLD THAT GUN?
158
00:08:58,405 --> 00:09:00,507
SO, WINSLOW,
159
00:09:00,574 --> 00:09:02,976
IS YOUR SON GOING
ON THE RIDE-ALONG?
160
00:09:03,043 --> 00:09:04,044
UH...
161
00:09:04,111 --> 00:09:04,712
NO, SIR.
162
00:09:04,778 --> 00:09:06,013
I'M AFRAID HE FORGOT
163
00:09:06,079 --> 00:09:10,083
THAT TODAY WAS HIS
PARAMEDIC RIDE-ALONG.
164
00:09:10,150 --> 00:09:11,585
GOOD GROUP.
165
00:09:11,652 --> 00:09:14,554
WE PLUG 'EM,
THEY PATCH 'EM.
166
00:09:15,288 --> 00:09:16,724
SO, YOU JUST WASTED
167
00:09:16,790 --> 00:09:19,192
43 MINUTES OF MY--
LET'S BE HONEST--
168
00:09:19,259 --> 00:09:20,527
PRECIOUS TIME?
169
00:09:20,594 --> 00:09:21,862
UH...
170
00:09:21,929 --> 00:09:24,364
WELL, I'M SORRY,
SIR, BUT, UH...
171
00:09:24,431 --> 00:09:27,200
CAN I GO?
CAN I GO?
172
00:09:27,267 --> 00:09:28,435
EXCELLENT IDEA.
173
00:09:28,501 --> 00:09:29,937
TAKE YOUR OTHER SON.
174
00:09:33,641 --> 00:09:35,976
THAT IS AN
EXCELLENT IDEA, SIR.
175
00:09:36,043 --> 00:09:37,778
EXCUSE ME.
176
00:09:45,753 --> 00:09:47,387
NICE MEETING YOU, KID.
177
00:09:47,454 --> 00:09:49,823
PUT HER THERE.
178
00:09:49,890 --> 00:09:51,491
SIX MONTHS
IN THE ACADEMY
179
00:09:51,558 --> 00:09:54,061
WILL FIRM UP
THAT GRIP.
180
00:09:55,128 --> 00:09:56,163
EXCUSE ME.
181
00:10:05,806 --> 00:10:07,975
GOOD DAY, GENTLEMEN.
182
00:10:20,020 --> 00:10:21,989
I'VE NEVER BEEN
IN A POLICE CAR.
183
00:10:22,055 --> 00:10:25,025
I WAS IN
AN AMBULANCE ONCE.
184
00:10:25,092 --> 00:10:26,093
WHAT HAPPENED?
185
00:10:26,159 --> 00:10:28,962
UNAVOIDABLE ACCIDENT.
ON MY 5th BIRTHDAY,
186
00:10:29,029 --> 00:10:32,165
MY PARENTS USED ME
TO BREAK THE PInATA.
187
00:10:36,704 --> 00:10:39,239
HEY, WHAT'S
THIS BUTTON FOR?
188
00:10:39,306 --> 00:10:41,308
[SIRENS BLARE]
189
00:10:44,678 --> 00:10:46,146
AW!
190
00:10:46,213 --> 00:10:49,683
WE DON'T NEED THE SIREN
RIGHT NOW, STEVE.
191
00:10:49,750 --> 00:10:51,584
OKEY-DOKE.
192
00:10:51,651 --> 00:10:54,888
HEY, WHAT'S IN
THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT?
193
00:10:56,489 --> 00:10:57,958
NOTHING! OH!
194
00:10:58,025 --> 00:10:59,426
WHOA!
195
00:10:59,492 --> 00:11:00,593
WHEW.
196
00:11:00,660 --> 00:11:03,163
I'VE NEVER SEEN A NUN
MOVE THAT FAST.
197
00:11:04,832 --> 00:11:07,134
JUST DON'T TOUCH
ANYTHING ELSE, OKAY?
198
00:11:08,168 --> 00:11:11,171
HEY, CAN I HOLD
YOUR SHOTGUN?
199
00:11:11,238 --> 00:11:12,940
DO I LOOK STUPID?
200
00:11:13,006 --> 00:11:15,442
ONLY WHEN
YOU PLAY GOLF.
201
00:11:17,811 --> 00:11:19,913
2-ADAM-12.
ROBBERY, 4th AND MAIN.
202
00:11:19,980 --> 00:11:21,681
MALE CAUCASIAN
SEEN FLEEING ON FOOT
203
00:11:21,749 --> 00:11:22,916
TOWARDS FREIGHT YARD.
204
00:11:22,983 --> 00:11:25,618
SUSPECT IS 5'9",
WEARING BLUE JEANS
205
00:11:25,685 --> 00:11:28,055
AND GREEN AND BLACK
PLAID SHIRT.
206
00:11:28,121 --> 00:11:29,356
BAD DRESSER.
207
00:11:29,422 --> 00:11:32,059
2-ADAM-12.
I'M ON IT.
208
00:11:32,125 --> 00:11:35,362
WHEN WE GET THERE,
STAY IN THIS CAR.
209
00:11:36,229 --> 00:11:37,430
10-4.
210
00:11:37,497 --> 00:11:39,366
STEP ON IT, PARD.
211
00:11:39,432 --> 00:11:41,701
LET'S NAIL
THIS HAIRBALL.
212
00:11:41,769 --> 00:11:43,570
2-ADAM-12.
213
00:11:43,636 --> 00:11:45,939
GIVE ME THAT!
214
00:12:06,626 --> 00:12:07,560
JACKSON!
215
00:12:07,627 --> 00:12:08,962
YEAH?
216
00:12:10,097 --> 00:12:13,166
TAKE THE FRONT.
I'LL TAKE THE BACK.
217
00:12:13,233 --> 00:12:14,467
GOT IT.
218
00:12:38,258 --> 00:12:39,259
FREEZE!
219
00:12:39,326 --> 00:12:41,161
[MOO]
220
00:12:42,429 --> 00:12:44,497
COWS.
221
00:12:49,469 --> 00:12:50,470
COWS!
222
00:12:50,537 --> 00:12:51,404
FREEZE!
223
00:12:51,471 --> 00:12:53,106
DON'T SHOOT!
224
00:12:54,407 --> 00:12:56,944
DIDN'T I TELL YOU
TO STAY IN THE CAR?
225
00:12:57,010 --> 00:12:58,378
YOU WERE GONE
A LONG TIME,
226
00:12:58,445 --> 00:13:01,381
AND THE HUMAN BLADDER
ONLY HOLDS 14 OUNCES.
227
00:13:02,515 --> 00:13:03,583
NEVER MIND.
228
00:13:03,650 --> 00:13:05,352
GET IN THE CAR.
229
00:13:06,653 --> 00:13:08,655
DID YOU NOTICE
THAT LANTERN?
230
00:13:08,721 --> 00:13:11,058
WHY DO YOU THINK
I CAME IN HERE?
231
00:13:15,628 --> 00:13:17,064
AND LOOK AT THIS.
232
00:13:17,130 --> 00:13:19,266
YEAH. SOMEBODY'S
BEEN STAYING HERE.
233
00:13:19,332 --> 00:13:19,900
HEY!
234
00:13:19,967 --> 00:13:20,834
WATCH IT.
235
00:13:20,901 --> 00:13:23,103
HEY! OPEN THIS DOOR!
236
00:13:23,170 --> 00:13:24,671
HEY! OPEN THIS DOOR!
237
00:13:24,737 --> 00:13:28,208
YOU HEARD HIM!
THIS IS YOUR LAST CHANCE!
238
00:13:28,275 --> 00:13:29,943
JACKSON!
239
00:13:30,010 --> 00:13:31,544
JACKSON,
ARE YOU OUT THERE?
240
00:13:31,611 --> 00:13:33,246
YEAH, JACKSON!
241
00:13:37,684 --> 00:13:39,386
WELL, WE'RE TRAPPED.
242
00:13:39,452 --> 00:13:40,453
STAND BACK.
243
00:13:40,520 --> 00:13:41,989
I'LL BLOW
THE LOCK OFF.
244
00:13:42,055 --> 00:13:45,125
CARL, DOES THE WORD "STAMPEDE"
MEAN ANYTHING TO YOU?
245
00:13:48,795 --> 00:13:50,097
WELL, STEVE,
246
00:13:50,163 --> 00:13:52,832
YOU HAVE REALLY MESSED
THINGS UP THIS TIME.
247
00:13:52,900 --> 00:13:55,135
IF YOU HAD STAYED
IN THE CAR,
248
00:13:55,202 --> 00:13:56,469
I WOULD HAVE
MADE MY BUST,
249
00:13:56,536 --> 00:13:59,339
AND WE WOULD
BE GONE.
250
00:13:59,406 --> 00:14:04,577
OKAY, SO MAYBE
I MADE A LITTLE BOO-BOO.
251
00:14:04,644 --> 00:14:06,379
BUT RELAX.
THEY'LL FIND US.
252
00:14:06,446 --> 00:14:09,416
IT'S NOT LIKE
WE'RE GOING ANYWHERE.
253
00:14:09,482 --> 00:14:12,152
[TRAIN WHISTLE]
254
00:14:13,520 --> 00:14:15,288
[WHEELS SQUEAK]
255
00:14:17,690 --> 00:14:19,426
I HOPE THAT
WAS YOUR STOMACH.
256
00:14:21,995 --> 00:14:23,630
WE'RE MOVING.
257
00:14:24,697 --> 00:14:26,433
JACKSON!
258
00:14:30,170 --> 00:14:33,006
THIS GETS BETTER
ALL THE TIME.
259
00:14:53,893 --> 00:14:56,296
WHY ISN'T CARL HOME YET?
260
00:14:56,363 --> 00:14:58,265
HARRIETTE,
YOU'RE REALLY WORRIED.
261
00:14:58,331 --> 00:14:59,732
OH, NO.
262
00:14:59,799 --> 00:15:01,168
OH, REALLY?
263
00:15:01,234 --> 00:15:04,204
THEN WHY ARE YOU
BAKING THE SALAD?
264
00:15:09,509 --> 00:15:10,577
IT'S DONE.
265
00:15:12,645 --> 00:15:15,215
OH! THE JOYS
OF BEING A COPS WIFE.
266
00:15:15,282 --> 00:15:17,684
YOU PANIC EVERY TIME
THEY'RE FIVE MINUTES LATE.
267
00:15:21,321 --> 00:15:23,323
MOM, WHEN'S DINNER?
WE'RE STARVED.
268
00:15:23,390 --> 00:15:25,592
SOON. YOUR DAD'S
RUNNING LATE.
269
00:15:25,658 --> 00:15:26,759
LET'S EAT EVERYTHING
270
00:15:26,826 --> 00:15:29,429
AND SEE IF HE CAN
TAKE A JOKE.
271
00:15:41,874 --> 00:15:43,010
UH-OH.
272
00:15:43,076 --> 00:15:44,911
EDWARD,
WHAT'S WRONG?
273
00:15:44,978 --> 00:15:46,113
MOM.
274
00:15:46,179 --> 00:15:48,515
THE MODELING AGENCY
WAS A BUST.
275
00:15:48,581 --> 00:15:51,985
THE PLACE WAS CRAWLING
WITH GOOD-LOOKING GUYS.
276
00:15:52,052 --> 00:15:53,987
REALLY?
277
00:15:54,054 --> 00:15:56,889
WHAT WAS
THAT ADDRESS?
278
00:15:56,956 --> 00:15:59,092
HOW ABOUT SOME SYMPATHY,
AUNT RACHEL?
279
00:15:59,159 --> 00:16:02,329
MY MODELING CAREER
ONLY LASTED 30 MINUTES.
280
00:16:02,395 --> 00:16:03,563
WELL...
281
00:16:03,630 --> 00:16:06,166
THAT'S LONGER THAN
MOST OF YOUR DATES.
282
00:16:15,708 --> 00:16:17,044
SO, HERE'S THE SKINNY.
283
00:16:17,110 --> 00:16:19,046
I LOVE LAURA.
284
00:16:19,112 --> 00:16:22,749
BUT, ALAS,
MY LOVE IS UNREQUITED.
285
00:16:22,815 --> 00:16:24,651
BUT I SHALL
NEVER GIVE UP.
286
00:16:24,717 --> 00:16:26,953
AND WHEN LAURA FINALLY
DOES SEE THE LIGHT,
287
00:16:27,020 --> 00:16:29,056
YOU'LL BE INVITED
TO THE WEDDING.
288
00:16:29,122 --> 00:16:31,358
OH, BUT NOT AS DINNER.
289
00:16:33,793 --> 00:16:36,563
SOMEBODY GET ME
OUT OF HERE!
290
00:16:36,629 --> 00:16:39,032
I WANT OUT!
291
00:16:39,099 --> 00:16:41,301
CARL. CARL.
292
00:16:41,368 --> 00:16:42,469
WHAT?
293
00:16:42,535 --> 00:16:44,904
DO YOU REALIZE
IF THAT DOOR OPENS,
294
00:16:44,971 --> 00:16:47,907
YOU'LL HAVE TO JUMP
FROM A MOVING TRAIN?
295
00:16:47,974 --> 00:16:50,443
YEP.
296
00:16:50,510 --> 00:16:51,744
CARL, DID YOU KNOW
297
00:16:51,811 --> 00:16:55,082
THERE ARE 99.3 MILLION COWS
IN THE UNITED STATES?
298
00:16:55,148 --> 00:16:58,051
WHAT, TWO DIED?
299
00:16:58,118 --> 00:17:00,453
KNOW WHY
COWS CHEW CUD?
300
00:17:00,520 --> 00:17:02,489
NO MONEY FOR GUM?
301
00:17:02,555 --> 00:17:04,757
GOOD ONE, CARL.
302
00:17:04,824 --> 00:17:07,227
A COW'S STOMACH
HAS FOUR PARTS.
303
00:17:07,294 --> 00:17:09,028
CUD IS ACTUALLY FOOD
REGURGITATED
304
00:17:09,096 --> 00:17:10,863
FROM THE FIRST STOMACH
BACK INTO THE MOUTH.
305
00:17:10,930 --> 00:17:13,600
SO IT CAN BE
FURTHER DIGESTED.
306
00:17:13,666 --> 00:17:16,436
WOW! WOULDN'T IT BE GREAT
IF YOU AND I
307
00:17:16,503 --> 00:17:19,539
CAN TASTE THE SAME FOOD
OVER AND OVER AGAIN?
308
00:17:21,108 --> 00:17:23,676
WE CAN ONLY DREAM.
309
00:17:23,743 --> 00:17:26,479
BOVINES ARE FASCINATING.
TOO BAD THEY'RE--
310
00:17:26,546 --> 00:17:29,182
OH, WOULD YOU PLEASE
STOP WITH THE COWS?
311
00:17:33,253 --> 00:17:36,356
SORRY. I'M GETTING
ON YOUR NERVES.
312
00:17:36,423 --> 00:17:38,258
I CAN SEE
THE HEADLINES NOW--
313
00:17:38,325 --> 00:17:41,328
"COP FLIPS OUT, KILLS FOUR COWS
AND AN URKEL."
314
00:17:43,363 --> 00:17:47,867
STEVE, YOU KNOW I'D
NEVER HARM A COW.
315
00:17:47,934 --> 00:17:48,668
HEE HEE HEE HEE!
316
00:17:48,735 --> 00:17:51,304
[SNORT SNORT]
317
00:17:51,371 --> 00:17:53,606
HOW DO YOU SNORT
LIKE THAT?
318
00:17:53,673 --> 00:17:55,041
IT'S ALL IN THE NOSE.
319
00:17:55,108 --> 00:17:55,842
WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
320
00:17:55,908 --> 00:17:57,110
SEE?
321
00:17:57,177 --> 00:17:59,812
HEE HEE HEE HEE!
[SNORT SNORT SNORT]
322
00:18:00,680 --> 00:18:02,849
YOU TRY.
323
00:18:02,915 --> 00:18:04,917
[SNORT SNORT]
324
00:18:04,984 --> 00:18:05,885
HEE HEE HEE!
325
00:18:05,952 --> 00:18:07,120
[SNORT SNORT]
326
00:18:07,187 --> 00:18:08,421
HEE HEE HEE!
[SNORT SNORT]
327
00:18:08,488 --> 00:18:08,988
HEE HEE HEE!
328
00:18:09,055 --> 00:18:10,857
[SNORT]
329
00:18:10,923 --> 00:18:13,126
[SNORT]
330
00:18:17,164 --> 00:18:19,599
I NEEDED A GOOD LAUGH.
331
00:18:21,901 --> 00:18:25,638
EVERY TIME YOU LAUGH
YOU BURN UP 3 1/2 CALORIES.
332
00:18:25,705 --> 00:18:28,341
MAYBE I SHOULD LAUGH
A LITTLE BIT MORE.
333
00:18:28,408 --> 00:18:30,710
[SNORT SNORT]
[SNORT SNORT]
334
00:18:35,114 --> 00:18:37,417
YOU KNOW SOMETHING,
CARL?
335
00:18:37,484 --> 00:18:38,885
YOU'RE ONE
OF THE GREATEST GUYS
336
00:18:38,951 --> 00:18:41,521
TO HAVE EVER
TROD THIS EARTH.
337
00:18:42,522 --> 00:18:43,423
I AM?
338
00:18:43,490 --> 00:18:45,858
YEAH. YOU'RE GREAT
WITH YOUR KIDS.
339
00:18:45,925 --> 00:18:47,360
YOU PLAY CATCH
WITH EDDIE.
340
00:18:47,427 --> 00:18:51,398
YOU TAKE LAURA AND JUDY TO THE
MALL IF NO SPORTS ARE ON TV.
341
00:18:51,464 --> 00:18:54,201
YOU DO
THINGS TOGETHER.
342
00:18:54,701 --> 00:18:55,868
WELL...
343
00:18:55,935 --> 00:18:58,271
I TRY.
344
00:18:58,338 --> 00:19:01,107
WANT TO KNOW A SECRET?
345
00:19:01,174 --> 00:19:03,376
OKAY.
346
00:19:03,443 --> 00:19:06,179
SOMETIMES I WISH
YOU WERE MY FATHER.
347
00:19:09,382 --> 00:19:12,452
WELL, STEVE, YOU HAVE
YOUR OWN FATHER.
348
00:19:12,519 --> 00:19:15,087
I KNOW, AND HE'S
A TERRIFIC GUY.
349
00:19:15,154 --> 00:19:17,190
I MEAN, HE'S SMART,
GOOD-LOOKING,
350
00:19:17,257 --> 00:19:19,826
AND REALLY KNOWS
HIS KABUKI THEATER.
351
00:19:21,127 --> 00:19:24,464
BUT I THINK HE'S
DISAPPOINTED IN ME.
352
00:19:24,531 --> 00:19:25,332
WELL, WHY?
353
00:19:25,398 --> 00:19:27,300
HE'S
A BRAIN SURGEON.
354
00:19:27,367 --> 00:19:29,736
AND HE WANTS ME
TO BE ONE, TOO.
355
00:19:29,802 --> 00:19:30,903
IT'S AN OKAY JOB,
356
00:19:30,970 --> 00:19:33,240
BUT, HEY, WHERE'S
THE CHALLENGE?
357
00:19:34,774 --> 00:19:37,977
WELL, STEVE, WHAT
DO YOU WANT TO DO?
358
00:19:38,044 --> 00:19:39,412
I DON'T KNOW YET.
359
00:19:39,479 --> 00:19:41,814
I'M INTERESTED
IN MANY THINGS.
360
00:19:41,881 --> 00:19:43,450
BUT IF YOU
WERE MY DAD,
361
00:19:43,516 --> 00:19:46,253
YOU'D LET ME MAKE
MY OWN DECISION.
362
00:19:47,454 --> 00:19:48,187
AHH.
363
00:19:48,255 --> 00:19:50,257
WELL, STEVE,
364
00:19:50,323 --> 00:19:53,926
PARENTS COME DOWN HARD
ON THEIR KIDS BECAUSE...
365
00:19:53,993 --> 00:19:56,496
THEY WANT
THE BEST FOR THEM.
366
00:19:56,563 --> 00:19:59,366
OR WHAT'S BEST
FOR THE PARENTS.
367
00:20:00,967 --> 00:20:02,935
MMM.
368
00:20:03,002 --> 00:20:05,438
YOU KNOW, STEVE,
369
00:20:05,505 --> 00:20:08,207
SOMETIMES EVEN THE BEST GUY
WHO EVER TROD THIS EARTH
370
00:20:08,275 --> 00:20:10,410
CAN MAKE
THAT SAME MISTAKE.
371
00:20:11,578 --> 00:20:14,281
BUT YOU'LL
MAKE YOUR PARENTS
372
00:20:14,347 --> 00:20:16,283
REAL PROUD
OF YOU SOMEDAY.
373
00:20:16,349 --> 00:20:18,084
YOU THINK SO?
374
00:20:18,150 --> 00:20:20,487
SURE. YOU'RE
A REAL BRIGHT KID.
375
00:20:22,689 --> 00:20:24,757
THANKS FOR
THE TALK, CARL.
376
00:20:24,824 --> 00:20:27,460
ANY TIME, STEVE.
377
00:20:35,635 --> 00:20:37,370
AHH.
378
00:20:42,509 --> 00:20:44,777
IT WAS
THE STRANGEST THING.
379
00:20:44,844 --> 00:20:47,547
THE TRAIN PULLS
INTO SPRINGFIELD FOR WATER.
380
00:20:47,614 --> 00:20:50,717
STEVE AND I ARE
SCREAMING FOR HELP.
381
00:20:50,783 --> 00:20:52,084
NOBODY HEARS.
382
00:20:52,151 --> 00:20:55,322
STEVE STARTS SINGING
I FEEL PRETTY.
383
00:20:55,388 --> 00:20:57,023
SUDDENLY, THERE'S
A BIG HOLE IN THE WALL,
384
00:20:57,089 --> 00:21:00,460
AND ALL THE COWS
ARE GONE.
385
00:21:04,096 --> 00:21:05,298
GOODNIGHT,
DADDY.
386
00:21:05,365 --> 00:21:07,467
GOOD NIGHT,
SWEETHEART.
387
00:21:07,534 --> 00:21:09,502
MOM WAS REALLY
WORRIED ABOUT YOU.
388
00:21:09,569 --> 00:21:11,338
YEAH? HOW DO
YOU KNOW?
389
00:21:11,404 --> 00:21:14,273
SHE KEPT TELLING US
SHE WASN'T.
390
00:21:14,341 --> 00:21:16,042
IS THAT TRUE,
HARRIETTE?
391
00:21:16,108 --> 00:21:18,845
OH, I KNEW
YOU'D BE FINE.
392
00:21:18,911 --> 00:21:21,314
WELL...
393
00:21:22,782 --> 00:21:25,518
I WAS
A LITTLE WORRIED.
394
00:21:26,285 --> 00:21:28,287
DAD, YOU GOT A SEC?
395
00:21:28,355 --> 00:21:30,056
SURE, SON.
GRAB A SEAT.
396
00:21:30,122 --> 00:21:31,190
OKAY, BEDTIME.
397
00:21:31,257 --> 00:21:32,959
LET'S HEAD 'EM UP
AND MOVE 'EM OUT.
398
00:21:33,025 --> 00:21:34,527
HARRIETTE.
399
00:21:37,430 --> 00:21:40,467
SORRY, CARL.
I COULDN'T RESIST.
400
00:21:45,705 --> 00:21:46,205
WHAT?
401
00:21:46,272 --> 00:21:47,206
OH, SHOOT.
402
00:21:47,273 --> 00:21:50,410
WHY DO I ALWAYS
HAVE TO GO?
403
00:21:52,812 --> 00:21:54,414
SO, WHAT'S
ON YOUR MIND, SON?
404
00:21:54,481 --> 00:21:57,484
DAD, I'M SORRY
I DISAPPOINTED YOU.
405
00:21:57,550 --> 00:22:00,420
I KNOW IT'S IMPORTANT FOR ME
TO BECOME A COP.
406
00:22:00,487 --> 00:22:03,089
SO IF YOU WANT ME--
407
00:22:03,155 --> 00:22:06,058
EDWARD, LISTEN TO ME.
408
00:22:06,125 --> 00:22:08,127
YOU DON'T HAVE
TO BE A COP.
409
00:22:08,194 --> 00:22:08,928
I DON'T?
410
00:22:08,995 --> 00:22:10,363
NO.
411
00:22:10,430 --> 00:22:11,631
BUT YOU'RE A COP.
412
00:22:11,698 --> 00:22:13,666
WELL,
THAT WORKS FOR ME.
413
00:22:13,733 --> 00:22:16,603
YOU DO WHAT WORKS
FOR YOU.
414
00:22:16,669 --> 00:22:19,872
I'M NOT SO SURE
WHAT THAT IS YET.
415
00:22:19,939 --> 00:22:23,476
WELL, WHENEVER YOU
MAKE THAT DECISION,
416
00:22:23,543 --> 00:22:25,177
I'LL SUPPORT YOU
ALL THE WAY.
417
00:22:25,244 --> 00:22:26,413
AND IN THE MEANTIME,
418
00:22:26,479 --> 00:22:29,782
I'LL TRY NOT TO PRESSURE YOU
SO MUCH. OKAY?
419
00:22:29,849 --> 00:22:31,017
THANKS, DAD.
420
00:22:32,885 --> 00:22:36,456
DID I EVER TELL YOU
THAT YOU'RE A GOOD KID?
421
00:22:36,523 --> 00:22:38,658
I THINK YOU
JUST DID.
27391
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