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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:05,472 --> 00:00:07,871 - good morning. 2 00:00:07,907 --> 00:00:10,040 Day shift orderlies, fall in. 3 00:00:25,291 --> 00:00:28,092 Barbarino, you got In just under the wire. 4 00:00:28,127 --> 00:00:29,326 - no, I didn't. 5 00:00:29,361 --> 00:00:31,762 I came in in the employees' Entrance just like you told me. 6 00:00:33,399 --> 00:00:35,343 - okay, here are Today's assignments. 7 00:00:35,367 --> 00:00:36,567 Emergency. 8 00:00:40,172 --> 00:00:42,506 You, in emergency, stat. 9 00:00:43,810 --> 00:00:45,610 Let's see, operating room. 10 00:00:49,716 --> 00:00:51,482 Very nice, barbarino. 11 00:00:51,517 --> 00:00:52,683 All you need is a tutu, 12 00:00:52,719 --> 00:00:55,185 And you'd be another Rudolph nureyev. 13 00:00:56,188 --> 00:00:57,855 Back. 14 00:00:57,890 --> 00:01:02,226 Now the operating Room... - let's see. 15 00:01:02,262 --> 00:01:04,562 You, assist in the Operating room. 16 00:01:05,898 --> 00:01:07,109 Okay, barbarino, You've been trying 17 00:01:07,133 --> 00:01:08,744 To get my attention. Now what is it? 18 00:01:08,768 --> 00:01:11,368 What, what, what? 19 00:01:11,404 --> 00:01:14,071 - look, I want an Important job to do. 20 00:01:14,107 --> 00:01:15,584 - oh, you do? - yes. 21 00:01:15,608 --> 00:01:17,448 - good. Because I'm putting you 22 00:01:17,477 --> 00:01:19,877 In charge of tile hygiene. 23 00:01:21,014 --> 00:01:22,746 - all right, tile hygiene! 24 00:01:22,782 --> 00:01:24,215 What is it? 25 00:01:24,250 --> 00:01:25,716 - same as usual. 26 00:01:27,687 --> 00:01:28,998 - nurse bonnie, all I Ever do around here 27 00:01:29,022 --> 00:01:31,188 Is mop floors and make beds. 28 00:01:31,223 --> 00:01:33,024 - practice makes perfect. 29 00:01:33,059 --> 00:01:34,536 - well, how come you don't Put me in the emergency room 30 00:01:34,560 --> 00:01:35,938 Like you do with the other guys? 31 00:01:35,962 --> 00:01:37,928 - you in the emergency room? 32 00:01:41,367 --> 00:01:43,067 - ha, ha, ha, ha. 33 00:01:44,370 --> 00:01:46,504 What's wrong? I can Handle an emergency. 34 00:01:46,539 --> 00:01:49,240 - you get confused when You change the mop water. 35 00:02:00,619 --> 00:02:04,454 - ♪ macho macho man ♪ 36 00:02:04,490 --> 00:02:08,458 ♪ I've got to be a macho man ♪ 37 00:02:08,494 --> 00:02:11,261 ♪ macho macho man ♪ 38 00:02:11,297 --> 00:02:13,764 ♪ I've got to be... ♪ 39 00:02:20,806 --> 00:02:23,174 Barbarino, don't come In here without knocking. 40 00:02:23,209 --> 00:02:24,820 Didn't anyone ever Teach you manners? 41 00:02:24,844 --> 00:02:27,278 - yeah, the same guy who Taught you how to dance. 42 00:02:30,850 --> 00:02:32,595 Oh, look, mr. Woodman, Look at this. 43 00:02:32,619 --> 00:02:34,096 Some guy with little Teeny weeny feet 44 00:02:34,120 --> 00:02:35,720 Walked all over your book. 45 00:02:39,659 --> 00:02:41,025 - what do you want, barbarino? 46 00:02:41,060 --> 00:02:42,871 - nurse bonnie at the Hospital, she's been giving me 47 00:02:42,895 --> 00:02:44,806 These dumb jobs lately And I want to show her 48 00:02:44,830 --> 00:02:46,030 That I can do more. 49 00:02:46,065 --> 00:02:47,331 - what are you gonna show her? 50 00:02:47,367 --> 00:02:49,367 How to hot wire an iron lung? 51 00:02:52,304 --> 00:02:54,104 That's funny. 52 00:02:54,140 --> 00:02:55,305 Hot wire an iron lung. 53 00:02:55,341 --> 00:02:57,542 I got to send that to Johnny for his monolog. 54 00:02:59,245 --> 00:03:01,090 - look, I want you to Call and recommend me 55 00:03:01,114 --> 00:03:02,480 To do some better jobs. 56 00:03:02,515 --> 00:03:06,250 - michael woodman Recommend vinnie barbarino? 57 00:03:06,285 --> 00:03:10,821 What is this, "Candid camera"? 58 00:03:10,856 --> 00:03:12,990 - look, all I want is a Chance to show her. 59 00:03:13,025 --> 00:03:16,026 - barbarino, look, nothing Comes easy in this world. 60 00:03:16,062 --> 00:03:17,840 I mean, let me ask You something. 61 00:03:17,864 --> 00:03:20,397 How do you think I got to Be principal of this school? 62 00:03:20,432 --> 00:03:22,432 - that's what everybody Wants to know. 63 00:03:24,603 --> 00:03:26,048 - if nurse bonnie doesn't Think you're ready 64 00:03:26,072 --> 00:03:28,050 For more responsibility, You're probably not. 65 00:03:28,074 --> 00:03:30,074 I mean, I can't Influence her decision. 66 00:03:30,109 --> 00:03:31,420 - so that means you Ain't gonna call her? 67 00:03:31,444 --> 00:03:32,743 - that's right. 68 00:03:32,779 --> 00:03:36,814 ♪ macho macho man ♪ 69 00:03:36,849 --> 00:03:40,684 ♪ I've got to be a macho man ♪ 70 00:03:40,719 --> 00:03:43,954 ♪ macho macho man ♪ 71 00:03:49,462 --> 00:03:50,427 - how'd you do, Huh? How'd you do? 72 00:03:50,462 --> 00:03:52,629 Did you get woodman To soften up? 73 00:03:53,633 --> 00:03:55,677 - I knew it. The only thing Soft about mr. Woodman 74 00:03:55,701 --> 00:03:57,134 Is his head. 75 00:03:58,471 --> 00:04:01,272 - well, his body ain't Exactly a piece of the rock. 76 00:04:02,341 --> 00:04:03,852 - I can see it now, 50 years from now 77 00:04:03,876 --> 00:04:06,210 I'll be the oldest Mopping orderly. 78 00:04:06,245 --> 00:04:09,313 They're gonna give me a Gold bucket and a gold mop. 79 00:04:13,986 --> 00:04:15,230 - well, look, if woodman Won't put in a good word 80 00:04:15,254 --> 00:04:17,165 For vinnie, then somebody Else is gonna have to. 81 00:04:17,189 --> 00:04:18,155 - yeah. 82 00:04:18,190 --> 00:04:19,702 - now, look, I know You guys are upset 83 00:04:19,726 --> 00:04:22,727 But don't do anything foolish. 84 00:04:22,762 --> 00:04:24,895 - we wouldn't do Anything foolish. 85 00:04:24,930 --> 00:04:26,930 That would be foolish. 86 00:04:29,101 --> 00:04:31,068 - we're cool. - me, foolish? 87 00:04:31,104 --> 00:04:32,369 - innocent as can be, c'mon. 88 00:04:46,052 --> 00:04:48,485 - ♪ welcome back ♪ 89 00:04:48,521 --> 00:04:52,322 ♪ your dreams were Your ticket out ♪ 90 00:04:52,357 --> 00:04:54,391 ♪ welcome back ♪ 91 00:04:54,427 --> 00:04:59,262 ♪ to that same old place That you laughed about ♪ 92 00:04:59,298 --> 00:05:01,498 ♪ well the names Have all changed ♪ 93 00:05:01,534 --> 00:05:03,333 ♪ since you hung around ♪ 94 00:05:03,368 --> 00:05:05,702 ♪ but those dreams Have remained ♪ 95 00:05:05,738 --> 00:05:08,238 ♪ and they've turned around ♪ 96 00:05:08,273 --> 00:05:10,351 ♪ who'd have thought They'd lead ya ♪ 97 00:05:10,375 --> 00:05:12,476 ♪ ♪ 98 00:05:12,511 --> 00:05:14,611 ♪ back here where we need ya ♪ 99 00:05:14,647 --> 00:05:16,680 ♪ ♪ 100 00:05:16,715 --> 00:05:18,415 ♪ yeah we tease him a lot ♪ 101 00:05:18,451 --> 00:05:20,584 ♪ 'cause we've got Him on the spot ♪ 102 00:05:20,619 --> 00:05:22,686 ♪ welcome back ♪ 103 00:05:22,721 --> 00:05:27,090 ♪ welcome back welcome Back welcome back ♪ 104 00:05:27,125 --> 00:05:29,493 ♪ welcome back welcome back ♪ 105 00:05:29,528 --> 00:05:31,394 ♪ yeah we tease him a lot ♪ 106 00:05:31,430 --> 00:05:33,597 ♪ 'cause we've got Him on the spot ♪ 107 00:05:33,632 --> 00:05:35,699 ♪ welcome back ♪ 108 00:05:35,735 --> 00:05:40,137 ♪ welcome back welcome Back welcome back ♪ 109 00:05:40,172 --> 00:05:44,441 ♪ welcome back welcome Back welcome back ♪ 110 00:05:44,477 --> 00:05:49,746 ♪ welcome back welcome Back welcome back ♪ 111 00:05:59,492 --> 00:06:00,457 - nurse bonnie? 112 00:06:00,493 --> 00:06:01,592 - yes? 113 00:06:01,627 --> 00:06:03,806 - I'd like to talk to you About vinnie barbarino. 114 00:06:03,830 --> 00:06:05,307 - if you have a Complaint about him 115 00:06:05,331 --> 00:06:08,199 You file it with the Administrator's office. 116 00:06:09,302 --> 00:06:11,668 - I don't have a Complaint about him. 117 00:06:11,704 --> 00:06:13,771 - you don't have a Complaint about him? 118 00:06:13,806 --> 00:06:16,273 Then why do you want To talk about barbarino? 119 00:06:17,910 --> 00:06:20,678 - nurse bonnie, I'm working At buchanan high school now 120 00:06:20,713 --> 00:06:23,613 And I've known vinnie A very long time. 121 00:06:23,649 --> 00:06:24,814 - how long? 122 00:06:24,850 --> 00:06:25,983 - four years. 123 00:06:26,018 --> 00:06:29,286 - oh, you poor dear. 124 00:06:29,322 --> 00:06:32,189 How did you manage To stay so young? 125 00:06:33,726 --> 00:06:38,896 - well, I find Vinnie exhilarating. 126 00:06:38,931 --> 00:06:40,541 - well, one woman's exhilaration 127 00:06:40,565 --> 00:06:43,267 Is another woman's aggravation. 128 00:06:44,369 --> 00:06:47,070 - nurse bonnie, despite His rough exterior 129 00:06:47,106 --> 00:06:49,439 There's a very Trustworthy, honest 130 00:06:49,474 --> 00:06:51,608 And level-headed young man. 131 00:06:51,643 --> 00:06:54,644 You know, he'd work very Hard if you'd give him a chance. 132 00:06:54,680 --> 00:06:56,213 - where is he? 133 00:06:56,249 --> 00:06:57,914 Where is he? 134 00:06:57,949 --> 00:07:01,318 I wants to see Orderly, orderly... 135 00:07:01,353 --> 00:07:03,653 - vinnie barbarino. - yes, yes, yes. 136 00:07:03,689 --> 00:07:06,056 I want to shake The hand of the man 137 00:07:06,092 --> 00:07:08,725 That performed this miracle. 138 00:07:12,898 --> 00:07:14,442 - guys, don't you Think you're going... 139 00:07:14,466 --> 00:07:16,211 - hey, don't say Another word, sister. 140 00:07:16,235 --> 00:07:17,901 You must hear what this giant 141 00:07:17,936 --> 00:07:19,448 Of the world of Medicine has done. 142 00:07:19,472 --> 00:07:20,604 - yes, yes. 143 00:07:20,640 --> 00:07:25,409 This young man here, he Was minding his own business. 144 00:07:25,444 --> 00:07:30,314 You see, he was Walking down the street, 145 00:07:30,349 --> 00:07:32,883 He was eating a Tuna fish sandwich 146 00:07:32,919 --> 00:07:36,253 When all of a sudden a Runaway hotdog truck came 147 00:07:36,289 --> 00:07:38,522 And ran him over. 148 00:07:38,557 --> 00:07:40,024 If it wasn't... I said, 149 00:07:40,059 --> 00:07:41,937 If it wasn't for The quick action 150 00:07:41,961 --> 00:07:44,261 Of orderly, uh, orderly... 151 00:07:44,296 --> 00:07:45,395 - vinnie barbarino. 152 00:07:45,431 --> 00:07:49,233 - yes, yes, that saved this Broken and shattered limb. 153 00:07:49,268 --> 00:07:52,269 - oh, yes, broken and shattered. 154 00:07:52,305 --> 00:07:54,971 - using the only Material at hand, 155 00:07:55,007 --> 00:07:58,575 Some napkins and some Soggy hotdog buns. 156 00:08:04,082 --> 00:08:08,252 And now, and now, in This moment of revelation, 157 00:08:08,287 --> 00:08:10,165 We shall see if Vinnie barbarino's 158 00:08:10,189 --> 00:08:14,657 Extraordinary efforts On medical science worked. 159 00:08:14,693 --> 00:08:16,860 - oh, please, let It be good news. 160 00:08:16,896 --> 00:08:20,564 - I only wish that his One arm be like the other. 161 00:08:26,272 --> 00:08:28,872 - move it, son! 162 00:08:28,908 --> 00:08:31,708 Move that arm. See the Glory of being healed. 163 00:08:31,743 --> 00:08:33,911 - agh, agh, it works, it works. 164 00:08:33,946 --> 00:08:35,023 - it's a miracle. It's a miracle. 165 00:08:35,047 --> 00:08:39,949 - it works, it Works, oh, it works. 166 00:08:39,985 --> 00:08:43,387 I'm whole again. 167 00:08:43,422 --> 00:08:46,990 And I owe it all to Vinnie barbarino. 168 00:08:47,025 --> 00:08:49,793 That's b-a-r-b-a-r-I-n-o. 169 00:08:50,962 --> 00:08:52,963 - I know who it is. 170 00:08:52,998 --> 00:08:54,932 And I know who you are. 171 00:08:54,967 --> 00:08:56,166 Now I'm a very busy woman. 172 00:08:56,201 --> 00:08:57,968 If you'll excuse me. 173 00:09:00,639 --> 00:09:04,274 - well, guys, looks Like you struck out. 174 00:09:04,310 --> 00:09:06,844 Do me a favor, the next Time use your heads, 175 00:09:06,879 --> 00:09:08,579 Not your hearts. 176 00:09:11,416 --> 00:09:12,828 - how are we gonna Explain this to vinnie? 177 00:09:12,852 --> 00:09:13,917 - I don't know. 178 00:09:13,953 --> 00:09:15,886 - c'mon, let's get out y'all. 179 00:09:15,921 --> 00:09:17,881 - hey, what are you Guys doing here? 180 00:09:19,591 --> 00:09:21,002 I told you not to hang out here. 181 00:09:21,026 --> 00:09:23,360 - barbarino, I want you To take mrs. Fishbein 182 00:09:23,395 --> 00:09:25,173 And her husband Up to 604 immediately. 183 00:09:25,197 --> 00:09:26,163 - right, right. - right now. 184 00:09:26,198 --> 00:09:27,776 - listen, get lost 'cause I'm trying to make 185 00:09:27,800 --> 00:09:28,766 A good impression On nurse bonnie. 186 00:09:28,801 --> 00:09:30,801 - okay, vinnie. We'll See you tomorrow. 187 00:09:33,806 --> 00:09:34,850 - how many times Have I got to tell you 188 00:09:34,874 --> 00:09:37,641 Not to hang out with me? 189 00:09:37,676 --> 00:09:40,010 Hi, just relax now. 190 00:09:40,045 --> 00:09:41,589 And we're gonna take You up to your room. 191 00:09:41,613 --> 00:09:43,246 So just sit back and relax. 192 00:09:43,281 --> 00:09:44,347 - relax? 193 00:09:44,382 --> 00:09:46,227 We left the game with The jets on the 5-yard line, 194 00:09:46,251 --> 00:09:48,752 4 minutes to go and You want me to relax? 195 00:09:50,957 --> 00:09:52,122 - what the heck was that? 196 00:09:52,158 --> 00:09:54,692 - well, either the elevator Jammed or the building sank. 197 00:09:55,995 --> 00:09:57,360 - we're trapped! 198 00:09:58,964 --> 00:10:02,399 Trapped like rats In a sinking ship. 199 00:10:02,434 --> 00:10:08,372 Just like, uh, shelley winters In the "Poseidon adventure." 200 00:10:08,407 --> 00:10:10,940 Oh, quick, let's crawl Towards the propeller. 201 00:10:10,976 --> 00:10:12,220 If we crawl towards The propeller 202 00:10:12,244 --> 00:10:14,055 We'll be able to feel The sun in our face. 203 00:10:14,079 --> 00:10:15,423 - arnold, hush now. Arnold, hush now. 204 00:10:15,447 --> 00:10:17,080 - we will be happy! 205 00:10:17,116 --> 00:10:19,716 What's the matter? 206 00:10:19,751 --> 00:10:21,451 - I got to think. 207 00:10:23,022 --> 00:10:25,389 - are you thinking? 208 00:10:25,424 --> 00:10:27,857 - I have a hard time thinking Straight in small places. 209 00:10:27,893 --> 00:10:29,226 - or big places. 210 00:10:29,261 --> 00:10:30,427 Or cold places. 211 00:10:30,462 --> 00:10:31,494 Or hot places. 212 00:10:31,530 --> 00:10:32,596 Or high places. 213 00:10:32,631 --> 00:10:34,631 - ohh, orderly. 214 00:10:34,667 --> 00:10:36,344 - yes, don't... Please, Just relax now. 215 00:10:36,368 --> 00:10:37,701 Look, everybody calm down. 216 00:10:37,736 --> 00:10:39,102 I'm gonna push the alarm button 217 00:10:39,137 --> 00:10:41,048 And we'll be outta Here in no time. 218 00:10:42,074 --> 00:10:43,807 - orderly? - yes? 219 00:10:43,842 --> 00:10:44,808 - he's coming. 220 00:10:44,843 --> 00:10:45,809 - I know he's coming. 221 00:10:45,844 --> 00:10:47,944 He's coming to fix the elevator. 222 00:10:47,980 --> 00:10:50,614 - no, not the Elevator repairman. 223 00:10:50,649 --> 00:10:52,415 The baby. 224 00:10:52,451 --> 00:10:53,451 - what? 225 00:10:55,755 --> 00:10:57,554 - I'm gonna have a baby. 226 00:10:57,589 --> 00:10:58,834 - I know you're Gonna have a baby. 227 00:10:58,858 --> 00:10:59,858 Congratulations. 228 00:11:01,426 --> 00:11:03,493 - that's nice. - he's coming right now. 229 00:11:03,529 --> 00:11:05,362 Ohh, ohh! 230 00:11:05,397 --> 00:11:07,397 - wait a minute. - wait, wait! 231 00:11:13,939 --> 00:11:15,750 - she can't have No baby here, man. 232 00:11:15,774 --> 00:11:17,974 We don't got... We Got no hot water. 233 00:11:19,711 --> 00:11:21,756 - I wonder what my dad Would say at a time like this. 234 00:11:21,780 --> 00:11:23,780 - help me! 235 00:11:23,815 --> 00:11:24,815 Excuse me. 236 00:11:24,850 --> 00:11:26,617 Help me! 237 00:11:26,652 --> 00:11:29,319 There's a teenager In trouble here. 238 00:11:30,922 --> 00:11:33,957 - no, that don't Sound like my daddy. 239 00:11:33,993 --> 00:11:35,725 - help me! 240 00:11:35,761 --> 00:11:37,094 Help me! 241 00:11:38,463 --> 00:11:41,331 There is a teenager In trouble here. 242 00:11:42,567 --> 00:11:44,835 - that sounds like my daddy. 243 00:11:44,870 --> 00:11:46,069 - oh my. 244 00:11:46,104 --> 00:11:48,872 Oh, sidney, what Are we gonna do? 245 00:11:48,907 --> 00:11:51,007 - myrna, why can't You have your babies 246 00:11:51,043 --> 00:11:52,743 Like ordinary normal people? 247 00:11:52,778 --> 00:11:55,145 Why do you always put me In a predicament like this? 248 00:11:55,180 --> 00:11:57,614 - sure, always Think of yourself. 249 00:11:57,650 --> 00:11:59,349 You never think of me, do you? 250 00:11:59,384 --> 00:12:00,629 - sweetheart, if I Never thought of you, 251 00:12:00,653 --> 00:12:02,385 Would you be in this condition? 252 00:12:03,789 --> 00:12:05,733 - all right, all right. Everybody, quiet! 253 00:12:05,757 --> 00:12:07,157 Quiet, everybody! 254 00:12:07,193 --> 00:12:08,270 - oh, will you stop it? 255 00:12:08,294 --> 00:12:10,594 I'm the one in charge Here. I'm the medical person. 256 00:12:10,629 --> 00:12:12,095 - ah-oh. 257 00:12:12,131 --> 00:12:14,531 - I can't look. Is it born yet? 258 00:12:14,566 --> 00:12:15,999 - no, it's not born yet. 259 00:12:16,034 --> 00:12:17,512 Look, I'm gonna Call nurse bonnie. 260 00:12:17,536 --> 00:12:18,713 We'll be out of here in no time. 261 00:12:18,737 --> 00:12:21,671 - oh, we'd better be because That's exactly what we got. 262 00:12:21,707 --> 00:12:23,273 No time. 263 00:12:24,310 --> 00:12:26,121 - nurse bonnie. Listen, We're in the elevator now 264 00:12:26,145 --> 00:12:27,844 And we're in a terrible fix 265 00:12:27,880 --> 00:12:30,446 And we're gonna Have a baby and every... 266 00:12:31,750 --> 00:12:33,183 It's vinnie barbarino. 267 00:12:35,020 --> 00:12:37,154 No, I must have got The wrong number. 268 00:12:38,824 --> 00:12:40,568 No, I would like to Take rumba lessons 269 00:12:40,592 --> 00:12:42,092 But not at this moment. 270 00:12:51,736 --> 00:12:53,503 - hello? 271 00:12:53,538 --> 00:12:56,506 No, barbarino, I do Not give rumba lessons. 272 00:12:58,010 --> 00:12:59,209 I know you're stuck. 273 00:12:59,244 --> 00:13:01,645 The repairman's on His way up to the roof. 274 00:13:01,680 --> 00:13:03,847 She's giving birth now? 275 00:13:03,882 --> 00:13:06,483 Oh, now you just calm That poor woman down 276 00:13:06,518 --> 00:13:08,318 And tell her not to cry. 277 00:13:09,488 --> 00:13:12,155 All right, then tell Arnold horshack not to cry. 278 00:13:15,794 --> 00:13:16,938 Listen, now. Stay on the phone 279 00:13:16,962 --> 00:13:18,895 Because I'm gonna Put a doctor on 280 00:13:18,931 --> 00:13:22,198 Because you just may Have to deliver this baby. 281 00:13:22,234 --> 00:13:24,100 - ha, okay, fine. 282 00:13:28,473 --> 00:13:29,639 Look, miss... 283 00:13:30,676 --> 00:13:32,809 - mrs. - mrs. 284 00:13:32,845 --> 00:13:36,546 Look, we're gonna have To have a baby together 285 00:13:36,582 --> 00:13:37,792 And I think we should Introduce ourselves. 286 00:13:37,816 --> 00:13:39,116 My name's vinnie barbarino. 287 00:13:39,151 --> 00:13:41,084 - myrna fishbein. 288 00:13:41,119 --> 00:13:42,786 - arnold horshack. 289 00:13:42,821 --> 00:13:45,455 Many happy returns Of the day, I'm sure. 290 00:13:45,490 --> 00:13:46,968 - and this is my Husband, sidney. 291 00:13:46,992 --> 00:13:48,537 Together: sidney! 292 00:13:50,829 --> 00:13:52,495 - oh-ohh! 293 00:13:52,531 --> 00:13:55,398 - is it born yet? 294 00:13:55,434 --> 00:13:56,611 - sport, let me Ask you something. 295 00:13:56,635 --> 00:13:59,269 Have you had much Experience in delivery? 296 00:13:59,304 --> 00:14:01,184 - yeah, I delivered Dry cleaning. 297 00:14:02,407 --> 00:14:04,119 - well, there's nothing To worry about. 298 00:14:04,143 --> 00:14:05,642 I'm an old hand at this. 299 00:14:05,678 --> 00:14:08,145 Ha, ha, ha. Oh, ohh, ohh. 300 00:14:08,180 --> 00:14:09,423 - I'm gonna get the Doctor on the phone. 301 00:14:09,447 --> 00:14:10,747 - no problem, no problem. 302 00:14:10,783 --> 00:14:12,749 We've done this Many times before. 303 00:14:12,785 --> 00:14:14,729 Seven times, to be Exact, huh, myrna? 304 00:14:14,753 --> 00:14:16,786 - sidney, I'm trying to relax. 305 00:14:16,822 --> 00:14:21,391 Don't remind me that I've Already got seven children. 306 00:14:21,426 --> 00:14:23,437 - ah, c'mon, myrna, They're all great kids 307 00:14:23,461 --> 00:14:26,129 And this isn't the worst Place you ever gave birth. 308 00:14:26,165 --> 00:14:27,898 Take our fourth kid. 309 00:14:27,933 --> 00:14:33,536 He was born in shea Stadium, on the 50-yard line. 310 00:14:33,572 --> 00:14:35,805 So we call him broadway joe. 311 00:14:37,042 --> 00:14:39,276 - broadway joe fishbein? 312 00:14:39,311 --> 00:14:41,044 Yeah, it's very original. 313 00:14:41,079 --> 00:14:42,179 - mm-hm. 314 00:14:42,214 --> 00:14:43,458 Ooh, he's a great Athlete that kid, 315 00:14:43,482 --> 00:14:45,948 But not as good as His brother muhammad. 316 00:14:47,552 --> 00:14:48,592 - muhammad fishbein? 317 00:14:48,620 --> 00:14:50,787 - yeah. Born ringside. 318 00:14:50,822 --> 00:14:52,955 The ali-norton fight. 319 00:14:52,991 --> 00:14:55,892 So an elevator, big deal. 320 00:14:55,927 --> 00:14:58,562 - what are you gonna Name this kid, otis? 321 00:15:01,800 --> 00:15:04,067 - we can handle it, huh, myrna? 322 00:15:04,102 --> 00:15:06,702 All this talk about how Tough it is to have a baby 323 00:15:06,738 --> 00:15:08,505 Is just a lot of malarkey. 324 00:15:08,540 --> 00:15:10,107 - easy for you to say. 325 00:15:10,142 --> 00:15:13,944 When the going gets Rough, you take off. 326 00:15:13,979 --> 00:15:17,313 Sidney thinks a man's Place during childbirth 327 00:15:17,349 --> 00:15:19,415 Is with his bartender. 328 00:15:21,019 --> 00:15:21,985 - guy's gonna have a hard time 329 00:15:22,020 --> 00:15:23,940 Getting out of This one, huh, sid? 330 00:15:24,957 --> 00:15:26,156 - ohh, ohh. 331 00:15:26,191 --> 00:15:28,224 - ohhh! 332 00:15:28,259 --> 00:15:29,992 - what's going on here? 333 00:15:30,028 --> 00:15:31,795 - quick thinking, huh, sid? 334 00:15:34,199 --> 00:15:37,366 - the pride of the yankees Just went down for the count. 335 00:15:37,402 --> 00:15:38,434 - all right. 336 00:15:38,470 --> 00:15:39,914 The doctor says that you Got to take deep breaths 337 00:15:39,938 --> 00:15:41,471 In order to feel better. 338 00:15:41,507 --> 00:15:42,507 Ready? 339 00:15:45,744 --> 00:15:47,077 - ohh! 340 00:15:47,112 --> 00:15:48,845 - I got to see what he says. 341 00:15:50,249 --> 00:15:52,649 Doctor, listen, I got To ask you a question. 342 00:15:52,684 --> 00:15:53,761 Look, now, if it's a boy, 343 00:15:53,785 --> 00:15:56,052 Do I got to take care Of religious stuff? 344 00:15:59,491 --> 00:16:02,024 No? Oh, good, good. 345 00:16:02,060 --> 00:16:03,926 Hey, c'mon, doc, look. 346 00:16:03,962 --> 00:16:06,463 I'm in the medical Profession, you know. 347 00:16:08,099 --> 00:16:09,799 Oh, no, okay, fine. 348 00:16:11,202 --> 00:16:12,380 Oh, he wants to talk to you. 349 00:16:12,404 --> 00:16:13,404 Come here. 350 00:16:15,173 --> 00:16:16,884 - hey, lemme give you a hand. - sit down, lay down. 351 00:16:16,908 --> 00:16:18,085 Take it easy. Take a Load off your feet. 352 00:16:18,109 --> 00:16:20,276 - there you go. - it's okay. 353 00:16:22,180 --> 00:16:25,314 - hello, doctor? 354 00:16:25,350 --> 00:16:29,452 Yeah, the contractions Are about a minute apart. 355 00:16:29,487 --> 00:16:34,090 No, the other births were All normal, no complications. 356 00:16:35,127 --> 00:16:37,293 - oh, hello, nurse bonnie. 357 00:16:38,429 --> 00:16:40,997 Yes, we have medical insurance. 358 00:16:42,901 --> 00:16:44,968 My social security number? 359 00:16:46,038 --> 00:16:49,139 Is that necessary right now? 360 00:16:49,174 --> 00:16:53,943 521-460... Ohh. 361 00:16:53,979 --> 00:16:55,778 Ahh. 362 00:16:58,550 --> 00:17:00,495 - c'mon, hang in There. I'm with you. 363 00:17:02,421 --> 00:17:04,588 - maternity elevator. 364 00:17:09,661 --> 00:17:10,827 Vinnie, it's for you. 365 00:17:10,863 --> 00:17:12,596 - hang on to my calls. 366 00:17:14,299 --> 00:17:16,933 - barbarino, barbarino! 367 00:17:16,968 --> 00:17:18,602 What's happening? 368 00:17:29,781 --> 00:17:31,159 Okay, clear the way, everybody. 369 00:17:31,183 --> 00:17:33,150 Out of the way, C'mon, clear the way. 370 00:17:35,454 --> 00:17:36,419 Here we go. 371 00:17:36,455 --> 00:17:37,565 Barbarino, you Get out of the way. 372 00:17:37,589 --> 00:17:39,234 I'll take care of this. - hey, I can help you with it. 373 00:17:39,258 --> 00:17:40,258 - go away. 374 00:17:46,164 --> 00:17:47,630 - hey, you're welcome! 375 00:17:51,002 --> 00:17:51,967 Oh, thank you. 376 00:17:52,003 --> 00:17:53,781 Thank you, but Really it was nothing. 377 00:17:53,805 --> 00:17:55,705 Nothing, really. 378 00:17:55,740 --> 00:17:57,307 What's that, mr. Cronkite? 379 00:17:59,044 --> 00:18:00,755 Oh, you want to give Me the key to the city? 380 00:18:00,779 --> 00:18:02,312 Oh, thank you. 381 00:18:02,347 --> 00:18:04,714 That's beautiful. 382 00:18:04,749 --> 00:18:06,015 But it was really nothing. 383 00:18:06,051 --> 00:18:08,418 It was, you know, Just the average day 384 00:18:08,454 --> 00:18:11,154 In an average orderly's life. 385 00:18:11,190 --> 00:18:13,101 You know, the Elevator gets stuck, 386 00:18:13,125 --> 00:18:14,791 You deliver a baby. 387 00:18:14,826 --> 00:18:16,759 I was ignored. 388 00:18:18,063 --> 00:18:20,062 Oh, barbara walters, really, no, 389 00:18:20,098 --> 00:18:21,475 I've love to go To dinner with you 390 00:18:21,499 --> 00:18:23,366 But I just can't. 391 00:18:23,401 --> 00:18:25,112 I... Really, I got more Important things 392 00:18:25,136 --> 00:18:26,869 To do right now. 393 00:18:26,904 --> 00:18:28,871 Like tile hygiene. 394 00:18:32,944 --> 00:18:34,511 - vinnie! 395 00:18:34,546 --> 00:18:35,745 Oh, vinnie! 396 00:18:35,781 --> 00:18:38,114 Vinnie, oh, wait 'til you see him. 397 00:18:38,149 --> 00:18:42,185 He's all pink and healthy And ready to face the world 398 00:18:42,220 --> 00:18:45,321 Like a brave little soldier. 399 00:18:46,358 --> 00:18:48,458 - oh, that's good, The baby's okay? 400 00:18:48,493 --> 00:18:49,459 - I don't know. 401 00:18:49,495 --> 00:18:52,095 I'm talking about mr. Fishbein. 402 00:18:52,130 --> 00:18:53,274 - hey, vinnie, let me Tell you something. 403 00:18:53,298 --> 00:18:55,565 If I was you, I'd get Out of town right away. 404 00:18:55,600 --> 00:18:57,400 I just got a look at that kid. 405 00:18:57,436 --> 00:18:59,735 The kid's all red, Wrinkled and distorted. 406 00:19:01,339 --> 00:19:04,174 It kinda looks like a little Mr. Woodman, you know? 407 00:19:05,477 --> 00:19:07,021 - you know, come to think of it, 408 00:19:07,045 --> 00:19:09,612 Mr. Woodman looks Like a little mr. Woodman. 409 00:19:09,647 --> 00:19:11,225 - yeah, c'mon, let's go And see the baby again. 410 00:19:11,249 --> 00:19:12,482 - oh, yeah, I love babies. 411 00:19:12,517 --> 00:19:14,094 - hey, vinnie, Check it out, bro. 412 00:19:14,118 --> 00:19:16,285 The doctor said that The kid is perfect. 413 00:19:16,321 --> 00:19:18,855 He said he couldn't have Done a better job himself. 414 00:19:18,891 --> 00:19:19,891 You did good. 415 00:19:19,925 --> 00:19:20,891 - you were great. 416 00:19:20,926 --> 00:19:22,003 We're all proud of you, vinnie. 417 00:19:22,027 --> 00:19:23,671 - yeah, well, Thanks, mr. Cronkite 418 00:19:23,695 --> 00:19:28,064 But it's just an average Day in average orderly's life. 419 00:19:28,100 --> 00:19:29,432 - walter cronkite? 420 00:19:30,835 --> 00:19:33,503 Hey, vinnie, you been Sniffing mop & glo again? 421 00:19:34,839 --> 00:19:36,250 - no. It's just that, you know, 422 00:19:36,274 --> 00:19:37,651 I try real hard to do something 423 00:19:37,675 --> 00:19:42,311 To impress nurse bonnie And I get ignored, you know? 424 00:19:42,347 --> 00:19:43,691 - hey, look, nobody's Ignoring you. 425 00:19:43,715 --> 00:19:45,460 Look, just give 'em a Chance and they're gonna... 426 00:19:45,484 --> 00:19:46,449 Look, here comes Mr. Fishbein now. 427 00:19:46,485 --> 00:19:48,128 Stand back and reap your reward. 428 00:19:48,152 --> 00:19:49,619 - what a wonderful day. 429 00:19:49,654 --> 00:19:51,854 A wonderful day! 430 00:19:51,890 --> 00:19:54,524 - what'd I tell ya? - the jets won. 431 00:19:56,528 --> 00:20:00,696 17 to 14, pulled it Out at the last minute. 432 00:20:00,732 --> 00:20:01,842 Oh, listen, I want to thank you 433 00:20:01,866 --> 00:20:04,467 For everything you've Done, everything. 434 00:20:04,503 --> 00:20:06,402 And to show our appreciation, 435 00:20:06,438 --> 00:20:08,349 We want to name The baby after you. 436 00:20:08,373 --> 00:20:10,540 So what's your name again? 437 00:20:10,575 --> 00:20:13,076 - vinnie. Vinnie barbarino. 438 00:20:13,111 --> 00:20:14,644 - vinnie. 439 00:20:14,679 --> 00:20:16,479 Vinnie fishbein. 440 00:20:19,251 --> 00:20:20,251 You play baseball? 441 00:20:20,285 --> 00:20:21,662 - yeah. - what position? 442 00:20:21,686 --> 00:20:22,985 - I used to play right field. 443 00:20:23,021 --> 00:20:23,986 - great. 444 00:20:24,022 --> 00:20:26,722 In your honor, we're Gonna name the kid reggie. 445 00:20:26,758 --> 00:20:29,259 Reggie fishbein. 446 00:20:29,294 --> 00:20:31,027 Don't that have a ring to it? 447 00:20:31,062 --> 00:20:33,029 Reggie fishbein. 448 00:20:35,100 --> 00:20:36,065 - see that? 449 00:20:36,101 --> 00:20:37,978 I delivered a guy's Baby and he names him 450 00:20:38,002 --> 00:20:39,735 After a candy bar. 451 00:20:42,574 --> 00:20:44,207 Nothing ever changes. 452 00:20:44,242 --> 00:20:45,274 - hey, vinnie. 453 00:20:45,310 --> 00:20:47,055 Things do change, man. Don't worry about it, man. 454 00:20:47,079 --> 00:20:48,189 That's not important. That don't matter. 455 00:20:48,213 --> 00:20:49,445 You know what matters? 456 00:20:49,480 --> 00:20:50,758 What matters is the Way nurse bonnie's 457 00:20:50,782 --> 00:20:53,083 Gonna be treating You from now on. 458 00:20:53,118 --> 00:20:54,084 Check it out, man. 459 00:20:54,119 --> 00:20:56,419 She'll worship the Ground you mop on. 460 00:20:58,690 --> 00:21:00,234 Barbarino? Barbarino: yeah? 461 00:21:00,258 --> 00:21:02,203 - I want you to stop Entertaining these delinquents. 462 00:21:02,227 --> 00:21:03,760 I've got work for you to do. 463 00:21:03,795 --> 00:21:05,294 Out, out! 464 00:21:05,330 --> 00:21:07,029 - I was leaving anyway, baby. 465 00:21:08,767 --> 00:21:10,778 - I want you to take The mop and the pail 466 00:21:10,802 --> 00:21:12,902 And put them in the closet. 467 00:21:12,938 --> 00:21:15,871 Because you're Working in emergency. 468 00:21:15,907 --> 00:21:16,972 - you're kidding? 469 00:21:25,484 --> 00:21:28,084 - well, barbarino, if I'd known You were gonna do that, 470 00:21:28,120 --> 00:21:30,586 I'd have given you this Assignment sooner. 471 00:21:39,898 --> 00:21:41,364 - ahhh. 472 00:21:41,399 --> 00:21:46,702 What a rewarding Experience, you know? 473 00:21:46,738 --> 00:21:49,505 Bringing a new Life into the world. 474 00:21:49,540 --> 00:21:50,807 - who are you kidding, arnold? 475 00:21:50,842 --> 00:21:52,953 Mrs. Fishbein brought A life into the world. 476 00:21:52,977 --> 00:21:54,889 We were more worried About bringing you back to life. 477 00:21:54,913 --> 00:21:57,046 - ha, ha, ha, ha. 478 00:21:57,082 --> 00:22:00,984 That's not true, beauregahhhg. 479 00:22:01,019 --> 00:22:02,697 - c'mon, c'mon, arnie, You were turning 480 00:22:02,721 --> 00:22:04,988 All kinds of colors, huh? 481 00:22:05,023 --> 00:22:06,333 I mean, for a while There you looked 482 00:22:06,357 --> 00:22:08,424 Like the jolly green midwife. 483 00:22:08,459 --> 00:22:10,026 - ha, ha! 484 00:22:10,062 --> 00:22:11,027 That's right, arnold, man. 485 00:22:11,062 --> 00:22:14,096 Your eyes were so Bugged out that it took 486 00:22:14,132 --> 00:22:15,765 Two of us to help you blink. 487 00:22:15,800 --> 00:22:17,734 Ha, ha! 488 00:22:17,769 --> 00:22:20,937 - well, listen to you. 489 00:22:20,972 --> 00:22:23,439 You helped deliver one Baby and you think you know 490 00:22:23,474 --> 00:22:25,875 Mr. Stork personally. 491 00:22:25,911 --> 00:22:27,588 - I could do it again, Man, just give... 492 00:22:30,648 --> 00:22:31,992 - guys, we got the Baby cleaned up. 493 00:22:32,016 --> 00:22:33,126 We can look at it Through the window. 494 00:22:33,150 --> 00:22:34,462 - all right, let's Check out the baby. 495 00:22:34,486 --> 00:22:35,718 Right on. 496 00:22:46,698 --> 00:22:49,999 - hey, um, look, why Don't we walk up? 497 00:22:50,035 --> 00:22:51,434 It'd be good for the exercise. 498 00:22:51,469 --> 00:22:53,169 Yeah. 499 00:22:53,205 --> 00:22:56,305 - sure, sure, it's Only nine floors. 500 00:22:57,442 --> 00:22:58,820 - yeah, we'll take The scenic route. 501 00:22:58,844 --> 00:23:01,211 - yeah, I'll make sure You don't get lost. 502 00:23:07,819 --> 00:23:10,053 - so? 503 00:23:11,756 --> 00:23:14,924 Is this your first baby? 504 00:23:14,960 --> 00:23:16,926 There's really nothing to it. 505 00:23:16,962 --> 00:23:18,828 I have found in my experience 506 00:23:18,863 --> 00:23:21,564 That if you do Heavy breathing... 507 00:23:21,599 --> 00:23:24,934 Breathe in and out, It's much better. 508 00:23:24,970 --> 00:23:27,470 You want to try it. In with the good air. 509 00:23:27,505 --> 00:23:29,138 Out with the bad air. 510 00:23:29,174 --> 00:23:30,606 In with... That's it. 511 00:23:45,089 --> 00:23:47,256 ♪ welcome back ♪ 512 00:23:47,292 --> 00:23:51,594 ♪ your dreams were Your ticket out ♪ 513 00:23:51,629 --> 00:23:53,729 ♪ welcome back ♪ 514 00:23:53,765 --> 00:23:58,501 ♪ to that same old place That you laughed about ♪ 515 00:23:58,537 --> 00:24:00,836 ♪ well the names Have all changed ♪ 516 00:24:00,871 --> 00:24:02,972 ♪ since you hung around ♪ 517 00:24:03,007 --> 00:24:05,041 ♪ but those dreams Have remained ♪ 518 00:24:05,076 --> 00:24:07,477 ♪ and they've turned around ♪ 519 00:24:07,512 --> 00:24:09,979 ♪ who'd have thought They'd lead ya ♪ 520 00:24:10,014 --> 00:24:11,826 ♪ ♪ 521 00:24:11,850 --> 00:24:14,083 ♪ back here where we need ya? ♪ 522 00:24:14,119 --> 00:24:15,930 ♪ ♪ 523 00:24:15,954 --> 00:24:17,787 ♪ yeah we tease him a lot ♪ 524 00:24:17,822 --> 00:24:19,989 ♪ 'cause we've got Him on the spot ♪ 525 00:24:20,025 --> 00:24:21,925 ♪ welcome back ♪ 526 00:24:21,960 --> 00:24:26,429 ♪ welcome back welcome Back welcome back ♪ 527 00:24:26,464 --> 00:24:31,567 ♪ welcome back welcome Back welcome back ♪ 528 00:24:31,603 --> 00:24:35,438 ♪ we always could Spot a friend ♪ 529 00:24:35,473 --> 00:24:37,273 ♪ welcome back ♪ 530 00:24:37,308 --> 00:24:42,211 ♪ and I smile when I think How you must have been ♪ 531 00:24:42,247 --> 00:24:46,649 ♪ and I know when it Seemed you were turnin' in ♪ 532 00:24:46,684 --> 00:24:50,820 ♪ was there somethin' that Made you come back again ♪ 533 00:24:50,855 --> 00:24:53,188 ♪ who'd have thought They'd lead ya ♪ 534 00:24:53,224 --> 00:24:55,202 ♪ ♪ 535 00:24:55,226 --> 00:24:57,259 ♪ back here where we need ya? ♪ 536 00:24:57,295 --> 00:24:59,462 ♪ ♪ 537 00:24:59,497 --> 00:25:01,196 ♪ yeah we tease him a lot ♪ 538 00:25:01,232 --> 00:25:03,499 ♪ 'cause we've got Him on the spot ♪ 38504

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