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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,490 --> 00:00:03,490 [MUSIC PLAYING] 2 00:00:18,950 --> 00:00:23,990 NARRATOR: In late 1986, a 55 gallon drum of highly toxic 3 00:00:23,990 --> 00:00:27,090 experimental chemical warfare nuclear waste 4 00:00:27,090 --> 00:00:29,400 was rumored to be missing from a high security 5 00:00:29,400 --> 00:00:33,320 warehouse facility at Fort Henry Dicker, Maryland. 6 00:00:33,320 --> 00:00:35,570 After many denials, it was finally 7 00:00:35,570 --> 00:00:37,790 admitted by top Pentagon officials 8 00:00:37,790 --> 00:00:42,170 that indeed one drum of the biohazard was unaccounted for. 9 00:00:42,170 --> 00:00:44,710 Fort Dicker spokesperson Brigadier General John 10 00:00:44,710 --> 00:00:47,350 Gillis maintains that this barrel 11 00:00:47,350 --> 00:00:49,920 poses no human health threat. 12 00:00:49,920 --> 00:00:53,260 Retired Fort Dicker scientist Dr. Roger Soriano 13 00:00:53,260 --> 00:00:56,460 when asked to comment, replied that this one 14 00:00:56,460 --> 00:01:00,120 particular barrel could mean the end of life 15 00:01:00,120 --> 00:01:02,120 as we know it on this planet. 16 00:01:04,950 --> 00:01:06,310 [MUSIC PLAYING] 17 00:01:11,000 --> 00:01:13,000 [MANIACAL LAUGHTER] 18 00:01:39,450 --> 00:01:41,440 [LAUGHTER ECHOING] 19 00:02:05,200 --> 00:02:07,690 Ooh! ORDERLY: Son of a bitch. 20 00:02:07,690 --> 00:02:08,390 [SLAPPING] 21 00:02:08,390 --> 00:02:10,390 ORDERLY: Get him down the hall, quick. 22 00:02:13,380 --> 00:02:14,880 [LAUGHTER ECHOING] 23 00:02:47,270 --> 00:02:49,710 [DOOR OPENS] 24 00:02:49,710 --> 00:02:51,210 DR KILDARE: So that's her, huh? 25 00:02:51,210 --> 00:02:51,930 Yes. 26 00:02:51,930 --> 00:02:54,190 Quite a disturbing case. 27 00:02:54,190 --> 00:02:56,070 And what's the prognosis? 28 00:02:56,070 --> 00:02:58,220 Our patient seems to be suffering 29 00:02:58,220 --> 00:03:01,510 from an acute effective paranoid psychosis 30 00:03:01,510 --> 00:03:05,260 with complications of schizophrenic melanomic edema. 31 00:03:05,260 --> 00:03:07,880 At least that's the preliminary indication. 32 00:03:07,880 --> 00:03:10,350 Well, there must be some way to break through it. 33 00:03:10,350 --> 00:03:12,350 What the hell happened up there? 34 00:03:12,350 --> 00:03:15,220 No one knows, but whatever it was, 35 00:03:15,220 --> 00:03:19,070 it must have been the epitome of horror. 36 00:03:19,070 --> 00:03:22,150 Well, do we have time for nine holes before surgery? 37 00:03:22,150 --> 00:03:23,430 Oh, yes. 38 00:03:23,430 --> 00:03:25,100 Let's play at your club. 39 00:03:25,100 --> 00:03:27,710 Mine doesn't allow Jews. 40 00:03:27,710 --> 00:03:30,430 Well, what's your hitting average these days, Sven? 41 00:03:30,430 --> 00:03:32,470 I'll go back to 16. 42 00:03:32,470 --> 00:03:33,940 16? 43 00:03:33,940 --> 00:03:35,880 [MANIACAL LAUGHTER] 44 00:04:02,590 --> 00:04:03,970 [VOICE ECHOING] 45 00:04:12,910 --> 00:04:14,860 [INAUDIBLE ECHOING] 46 00:04:41,630 --> 00:04:43,620 [COUNTRY MUSIC PLAYING] 47 00:06:06,420 --> 00:06:09,870 [MUSIC ON RADIO] 48 00:06:09,870 --> 00:06:12,250 It's messing with my head driving this shit 49 00:06:12,250 --> 00:06:14,260 from one dump to another. 50 00:06:14,260 --> 00:06:16,950 Just don't make no sense. 51 00:06:16,950 --> 00:06:18,470 Can't keep it in Cumberlink because it's 52 00:06:18,470 --> 00:06:20,530 too close to the river, so it's got 53 00:06:20,530 --> 00:06:23,890 to go to [INAUDIBLE] where it'll be too close to the ocean. 54 00:06:23,890 --> 00:06:26,140 Can you believe that, Hoss? 55 00:06:26,140 --> 00:06:28,270 So now here I am in the middle of redneck 56 00:06:28,270 --> 00:06:32,200 nowhere with a few stripes and a short straw playing 57 00:06:32,200 --> 00:06:35,520 nursemaid to a god damn tin can full of chemical toxic warfare 58 00:06:35,520 --> 00:06:37,190 waste. [STATIC] 59 00:06:37,190 --> 00:06:38,640 Oh, shit. 60 00:06:38,640 --> 00:06:40,580 PREACHER (ON RADIO): And the Lord, I said the Lord 61 00:06:40,580 --> 00:06:43,490 has made men equal in his eyes. 62 00:06:43,490 --> 00:06:47,220 We are all brothers, and that is why we must be rid, I say, 63 00:06:47,220 --> 00:06:50,920 must be rid of those who would disgrace brotherhood. 64 00:06:50,920 --> 00:06:53,560 We must smite the niggers and chase the [INAUDIBLE] 65 00:06:53,560 --> 00:06:56,210 Bastards from off... Fuck you. 66 00:06:59,830 --> 00:07:03,200 Now, let's see, I'm sure this splotch right here 67 00:07:03,200 --> 00:07:05,550 is that tree right over there. 68 00:07:05,550 --> 00:07:07,550 I think that splotch is a tobacco stain. 69 00:07:07,550 --> 00:07:09,550 That old man dribbled like a Harlem globetrotter. 70 00:07:09,550 --> 00:07:11,680 BOB: Hell, he was missing so many teeth it looked like Mr 71 00:07:11,680 --> 00:07:13,140 T did a workout on his face. 72 00:07:13,140 --> 00:07:15,600 Well I pity the fool who don't cut the bullshit 73 00:07:15,600 --> 00:07:17,670 and find a trail before we die out here. 74 00:07:17,670 --> 00:07:20,130 Unless you can't find it, Wilbur. 75 00:07:20,130 --> 00:07:22,540 I'll find it, don't you worry none little lady. 76 00:07:22,540 --> 00:07:27,090 I'm sure that this splotch is that tree, dickhead. 77 00:07:27,090 --> 00:07:29,410 Which means this scraw is probably that fence. 78 00:07:36,140 --> 00:07:38,200 Which means the trail is right over here. 79 00:07:42,430 --> 00:07:43,330 Hot damn! 80 00:07:43,330 --> 00:07:44,890 Hallelujah. 81 00:07:44,890 --> 00:07:47,220 Hey, don't be singing no spirituals now, Theresa. 82 00:07:47,220 --> 00:07:50,170 I'll tell you what, I'll just sing about redneck white boys 83 00:07:50,170 --> 00:07:53,540 who a pain in they own ass. 84 00:07:53,540 --> 00:07:55,390 Are we going to stand here and slap gums, 85 00:07:55,390 --> 00:07:57,120 or are we going to get into some serious wilderness? 86 00:07:57,120 --> 00:07:58,630 Well how about we stay? 87 00:07:58,630 --> 00:07:59,790 Eat me, Bob. 88 00:07:59,790 --> 00:08:02,560 - No, baby, I don't do that shit. - I know. 89 00:08:02,560 --> 00:08:04,460 Come on, let's get a move on so we 90 00:08:04,460 --> 00:08:06,530 can have camp set before dark. 91 00:08:06,530 --> 00:08:08,700 All this and brains, too. 92 00:08:19,350 --> 00:08:21,230 WILBUR: How are you feeling, Andrew? 93 00:08:21,230 --> 00:08:23,070 Finer than frog's hair, Wilbur. 94 00:08:23,070 --> 00:08:24,580 Well, come on, Mr. Clean. 95 00:08:24,580 --> 00:08:27,550 I don't know why you're always knocking my personal hygiene. 96 00:08:27,550 --> 00:08:29,330 The odor emanating from your upper pubic hairs 97 00:08:29,330 --> 00:08:31,870 could knock The Terminator off a shit wagon. 98 00:08:31,870 --> 00:08:33,040 Maybe you should try some. 99 00:08:33,040 --> 00:08:35,450 I mean, what's it going to do, make you dissolve or something? 100 00:08:35,450 --> 00:08:36,750 - Think I should? - Yeah, sure. 101 00:08:36,750 --> 00:08:39,520 Keep it. Don't worry, I've got plenty. 102 00:08:39,520 --> 00:08:42,080 Listen, you were just kidding about my pubes, weren't you? 103 00:08:42,080 --> 00:08:42,780 Yeah, sure. 104 00:08:42,780 --> 00:08:46,760 Don't worry, anyway, that'll take care of it. 105 00:08:46,760 --> 00:08:48,720 Oh, man, I been talking your ears off 106 00:08:48,720 --> 00:08:50,620 and I haven't even offered you a huff. 107 00:08:50,620 --> 00:08:51,470 How about it? 108 00:08:51,470 --> 00:08:54,240 You want to hit a joint? 109 00:08:54,240 --> 00:08:55,610 [BURP] 110 00:08:55,610 --> 00:08:58,000 Just what I thought you'd said. 111 00:08:58,000 --> 00:09:00,160 Here you go. 112 00:09:00,160 --> 00:09:01,640 [RADIO STATIC] 113 00:09:07,080 --> 00:09:09,050 TYRONE: [INAUDIBLE] 114 00:09:09,050 --> 00:09:10,540 [DOG BARKING] 115 00:09:20,910 --> 00:09:24,820 Shit on a toadstool. 116 00:09:24,820 --> 00:09:25,800 Watch it. 117 00:09:48,970 --> 00:09:50,530 Phew, no leaks. 118 00:09:55,250 --> 00:09:57,610 Get off my land! 119 00:09:57,610 --> 00:10:00,910 Get off my soil. 120 00:10:00,910 --> 00:10:01,810 Uh, whoa. 121 00:10:01,810 --> 00:10:02,570 Be cool, yo. 122 00:10:02,570 --> 00:10:04,840 I just lost some shit here. 123 00:10:04,840 --> 00:10:08,360 And I don't need no revenuers poking around in my business. 124 00:10:08,360 --> 00:10:09,360 Now, get! 125 00:10:09,360 --> 00:10:13,970 Look here, slim, I just need my barrel. 126 00:10:13,970 --> 00:10:19,710 Now what we have here is a failure to communicate. 127 00:10:19,710 --> 00:10:21,710 Bitch! 128 00:10:21,710 --> 00:10:23,200 [GUNSHOT] 129 00:10:49,700 --> 00:10:54,400 Do not open till Christmas. 130 00:11:05,110 --> 00:11:06,100 [GUN COCKS] 131 00:11:08,610 --> 00:11:11,700 Jed, Junior, Jethro, Billy Bob. 132 00:11:11,700 --> 00:11:14,910 Elly May to you, coon shit. 133 00:11:14,910 --> 00:11:15,870 Right. 134 00:11:15,870 --> 00:11:17,670 What did you do to our still? 135 00:11:17,670 --> 00:11:19,300 Still? 136 00:11:19,300 --> 00:11:21,960 Uh, I didn't shoot your still. 137 00:11:21,960 --> 00:11:23,640 Anyways, it was an accident. 138 00:11:23,640 --> 00:11:27,480 You see, I was walking up the road and I dropped my gun, 139 00:11:27,480 --> 00:11:30,920 and it went off three or four times. 140 00:11:30,920 --> 00:11:33,580 You know we promised all the swill they could drink down 141 00:11:33,580 --> 00:11:35,230 in the valley before you got into town, 142 00:11:35,230 --> 00:11:37,450 and you shot up our still. 143 00:11:37,450 --> 00:11:40,480 So now I think we're going to have to use your still 144 00:11:40,480 --> 00:11:42,070 to deliver. 145 00:11:42,070 --> 00:11:44,140 My still? 146 00:11:44,140 --> 00:11:45,900 You want to use my still? 147 00:11:45,900 --> 00:11:47,910 My still ain't no good. 148 00:11:47,910 --> 00:11:49,300 You said so a thousand times yourself. 149 00:11:49,300 --> 00:11:52,950 Ferd Mertz, your still ain't no good. 150 00:11:52,950 --> 00:11:55,880 Tell you what, look what I got for you here. 151 00:11:55,880 --> 00:11:57,800 Brand new still. 152 00:11:57,800 --> 00:12:00,440 One of them European jobs. 153 00:12:00,440 --> 00:12:01,150 Slick. 154 00:12:01,150 --> 00:12:02,170 Look at that. 155 00:12:02,170 --> 00:12:03,770 Sturdy, kick them rims. 156 00:12:03,770 --> 00:12:07,140 Yeah, this still work good for you. 157 00:12:07,140 --> 00:12:08,820 And look at that paint job. 158 00:12:08,820 --> 00:12:10,450 Young, fast. 159 00:12:10,450 --> 00:12:12,260 Does have a nice paint job. 160 00:12:12,260 --> 00:12:15,170 And all this can be yours, seeing you need it so bad, 161 00:12:15,170 --> 00:12:17,470 cuz I'm your friend, Ferd. 162 00:12:17,470 --> 00:12:18,730 Let's buy it, daddy. 163 00:12:21,630 --> 00:12:24,460 Well, OK, but if you ever mess around our still again, 164 00:12:24,460 --> 00:12:27,010 Ferd Mertz, you're going to be picking buckshot 165 00:12:27,010 --> 00:12:29,270 from where the sun don't shine. 166 00:12:29,270 --> 00:12:30,430 You mean Antarctica? 167 00:12:30,430 --> 00:12:31,940 JED: Get! 168 00:12:31,940 --> 00:12:34,120 Well the sun don't shine in Antarctica. 169 00:12:34,120 --> 00:12:36,650 All they got down there are them funny little penguins 170 00:12:36,650 --> 00:12:38,980 and those big polar bears. Grr! 171 00:12:38,980 --> 00:12:39,980 Ahh! 172 00:12:39,980 --> 00:12:40,840 Scared myself. 173 00:12:46,500 --> 00:12:48,910 Gee, daddy, why didn't we shoot that vermin? 174 00:12:48,910 --> 00:12:51,400 Yeah, we should've filled him full of holes. 175 00:12:51,400 --> 00:12:52,830 Yeah, we should've plugerized him. 176 00:12:52,830 --> 00:12:54,530 Oh now, come on, boys. 177 00:12:54,530 --> 00:12:56,600 I taught you all better than that. 178 00:12:56,600 --> 00:13:00,280 Just because old Ferd's got polecat shit for brains 179 00:13:00,280 --> 00:13:02,220 don't mean he'd be all bad. 180 00:13:02,220 --> 00:13:04,810 Oh sure, I do get my dander up once in a while. 181 00:13:04,810 --> 00:13:09,070 And maybe I do feel like blowing a hole in his ass. 182 00:13:09,070 --> 00:13:11,510 But he did give us this nice barrel here. 183 00:13:11,510 --> 00:13:15,290 And well, sometimes you just gotta do what's right. 184 00:13:15,290 --> 00:13:18,780 Doesn't mean you have to like it. 185 00:13:18,780 --> 00:13:19,590 Huh? 186 00:13:19,590 --> 00:13:20,960 Shut up! 187 00:13:20,960 --> 00:13:21,950 You're right, daddy. 188 00:13:25,450 --> 00:13:26,450 Dang. 189 00:13:26,450 --> 00:13:29,080 That thing's heavier than a cement yule. 190 00:13:29,080 --> 00:13:31,430 Go get our new truck, Billy Bob. 191 00:13:31,430 --> 00:13:34,070 How many times do I have to tell you, daddy? 192 00:13:34,070 --> 00:13:36,120 Call me Elly May. 193 00:13:36,120 --> 00:13:37,570 All right, dag nabit! 194 00:13:37,570 --> 00:13:42,220 Go get the new truck, Elly May, before I tan your hide. 195 00:13:42,220 --> 00:13:46,030 Gee, daddy, why does Billy Bob want us to call him Elly May? 196 00:13:46,030 --> 00:13:47,460 Well, Junior... 197 00:13:47,460 --> 00:13:48,990 I'm Jethro, Pa. 198 00:13:48,990 --> 00:13:51,150 I'm Junior. 199 00:13:51,150 --> 00:13:58,790 Well, Jethro, your brother's kinda funny and oh, never mind. 200 00:13:58,790 --> 00:14:01,550 I never should've bought that dang satellite TV anyhow. 201 00:14:01,550 --> 00:14:02,800 I like that satellite TV. 202 00:14:02,800 --> 00:14:03,500 Me, too. 203 00:14:03,500 --> 00:14:04,380 I like it. 204 00:14:04,380 --> 00:14:06,080 I like Jeckyl and Jeckyl. 205 00:14:11,510 --> 00:14:13,130 [ARGUING] 206 00:14:19,950 --> 00:14:20,650 You bitch! 207 00:14:24,870 --> 00:14:27,620 You boys hurry up with that thing. 208 00:14:27,620 --> 00:14:30,880 We got work ahead of us if we're going to get that mash 209 00:14:30,880 --> 00:14:32,510 delivered in town by tonight. 210 00:14:36,500 --> 00:14:40,970 Oh, you've been a good old girl to us, Florey. 211 00:14:40,970 --> 00:14:45,070 But I guess I gotta put you down. 212 00:14:45,070 --> 00:14:46,910 I hate to do it, you know? 213 00:14:46,910 --> 00:14:50,540 But it... it's like my daddy used to say to me before he 214 00:14:50,540 --> 00:14:53,250 got run over by that tractor. 215 00:14:53,250 --> 00:14:56,450 Sometimes life sucks. 216 00:14:56,450 --> 00:14:58,140 Well you boys hurry up? 217 00:14:58,140 --> 00:14:59,310 Now get a move on. 218 00:14:59,310 --> 00:15:00,080 We ain't got all night. 219 00:15:00,080 --> 00:15:02,800 - Jethro, come on. - Ow! 220 00:15:02,800 --> 00:15:03,500 Oh! 221 00:15:06,050 --> 00:15:08,290 Ow! 222 00:15:08,290 --> 00:15:09,670 Oh, my foot. 223 00:15:09,670 --> 00:15:12,220 Quit your whining, Junior. 224 00:15:12,220 --> 00:15:13,640 I'm Jethro, Pa. 225 00:15:13,640 --> 00:15:15,350 Oh, quit your whining anyhow. 226 00:15:15,350 --> 00:15:17,300 Now get the dang thing opened up. 227 00:15:17,300 --> 00:15:19,200 What do you suppose is inside, Pa, huh? 228 00:15:19,200 --> 00:15:22,330 Well, my guess is that it's either 229 00:15:22,330 --> 00:15:24,850 bleach, iodine, or fertilizer. 230 00:15:24,850 --> 00:15:25,910 Ooh, I hope it's fertilizer. 231 00:15:25,910 --> 00:15:26,840 I like fertilizer. 232 00:15:26,840 --> 00:15:28,360 Me, too, Pa. 233 00:15:28,360 --> 00:15:30,090 Ow! 234 00:15:30,090 --> 00:15:31,060 What'd I do? 235 00:15:31,060 --> 00:15:32,220 Oh, never mind. 236 00:15:32,220 --> 00:15:35,180 Now just get the dang thing opened up, Billy Bob. 237 00:15:35,180 --> 00:15:37,080 Elly May, daddy. 238 00:15:37,080 --> 00:15:38,590 I asked you nice. 239 00:15:41,830 --> 00:15:43,900 You sure weird, boy. 240 00:15:43,900 --> 00:15:47,310 Must take after your Ma's side of the family. 241 00:15:47,310 --> 00:15:48,600 Now get to work, Elly May. 242 00:16:08,560 --> 00:16:10,060 [DOG BARKING] 243 00:16:21,290 --> 00:16:21,990 Wait a minute. 244 00:16:26,350 --> 00:16:27,050 OK. 245 00:16:34,250 --> 00:16:35,680 [SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC] 246 00:17:08,350 --> 00:17:09,340 What is it, Daddy? 247 00:17:09,340 --> 00:17:11,090 Yeah, Pa, what is it? 248 00:17:17,810 --> 00:17:24,120 Well, uh, it looks like fertilizer. 249 00:17:24,120 --> 00:17:30,850 Smells like iodine with a piss of bleach in it. 250 00:17:30,850 --> 00:17:32,250 Hmm. 251 00:17:32,250 --> 00:17:34,580 Maybe it's all of them, Daddy. 252 00:17:34,580 --> 00:17:37,430 Well, whatever it is, it better taste 253 00:17:37,430 --> 00:17:40,570 good because you splattered it all over the corn squeezings, 254 00:17:40,570 --> 00:17:42,730 you otter ass. 255 00:17:42,730 --> 00:17:44,720 I'm sorry, Daddy. 256 00:17:44,720 --> 00:17:46,220 [BELL DINGS] 257 00:17:46,220 --> 00:17:48,110 Daddy, Daddy, it's the tobacco man! 258 00:17:48,110 --> 00:17:49,640 Give us some money, Daddy! 259 00:17:49,640 --> 00:17:54,100 Hurry, Daddy, before he leaves. 260 00:17:54,100 --> 00:17:56,730 Hold your pants on, boys. 261 00:17:56,730 --> 00:17:58,290 He ain't going nowhere. 262 00:18:02,570 --> 00:18:05,700 Here's your money. 263 00:18:05,700 --> 00:18:10,900 And I want you to go ahead get some tobacco for my pipe. 264 00:18:10,900 --> 00:18:11,600 Yeah! 265 00:18:15,590 --> 00:18:17,090 [BELL DINGING] 266 00:18:30,060 --> 00:18:31,840 Hi, Mr tobacco man. How are you... 267 00:18:31,840 --> 00:18:32,680 Hi, Mr tobacco man! 268 00:18:32,680 --> 00:18:33,730 Hi, Mr tobacco man! 269 00:18:36,710 --> 00:18:40,420 I've been waiting for you, boys. 270 00:18:40,420 --> 00:18:41,480 I've been waiting. 271 00:18:45,480 --> 00:18:48,730 What'll it be today, boys? 272 00:18:48,730 --> 00:18:50,080 [LAUGHING] 273 00:18:50,080 --> 00:18:54,660 I got dip for the gum, snuff for the nose. 274 00:18:54,660 --> 00:18:59,350 I got roll your own smokes and a new fangled machine 275 00:18:59,350 --> 00:19:02,080 that rolls them for you. 276 00:19:02,080 --> 00:19:05,980 I even got pellets that taste like licorice. 277 00:19:05,980 --> 00:19:07,990 Don't have to spit them out. 278 00:19:07,990 --> 00:19:10,400 Just let it dissolve. 279 00:19:10,400 --> 00:19:11,360 Oh, they good. 280 00:19:11,360 --> 00:19:14,860 They good for young ones just like you. 281 00:19:14,860 --> 00:19:16,700 What'll it be, boys? 282 00:19:16,700 --> 00:19:17,620 Dip, dip! 283 00:19:17,620 --> 00:19:21,830 We want dip and flake for Daddy's pipe! 284 00:19:21,830 --> 00:19:23,820 All right, boys. 285 00:19:29,810 --> 00:19:31,670 Here's your dip. 286 00:19:37,650 --> 00:19:42,500 And here's the flake for your daddy's pipe. 287 00:19:42,500 --> 00:19:43,990 [CHUCKLING] 288 00:20:04,950 --> 00:20:06,450 Thank you! We love our dip! 289 00:20:06,450 --> 00:20:07,950 We love our dip. 290 00:20:07,950 --> 00:20:08,940 Yeah, we do! 291 00:20:08,940 --> 00:20:11,950 Run along now, boys. 292 00:20:11,950 --> 00:20:18,430 I know you like my dip, but dark times are coming. 293 00:20:18,430 --> 00:20:21,910 You'll like my dip for a long time. 294 00:20:21,910 --> 00:20:26,890 You'll be loving it just for the rest of your lives. 295 00:20:26,890 --> 00:20:32,500 Someday you'll want to stop, but you won't be able to. 296 00:20:32,500 --> 00:20:37,750 Your gums'll start hurting, start bleeding. 297 00:20:37,750 --> 00:20:41,880 They'll wear down and show the bottoms of your teeth. 298 00:20:41,880 --> 00:20:44,890 Then your teeth will fall out. 299 00:20:44,890 --> 00:20:46,740 You'll cry. 300 00:20:46,740 --> 00:20:50,960 [CHUCKLES] But you won't stop. 301 00:20:50,960 --> 00:20:54,730 You'll just keep on dipping, and packing, 302 00:20:54,730 --> 00:20:56,940 and packing, and dipping. 303 00:20:56,940 --> 00:21:00,950 Your mouth will start hurting, start burning. 304 00:21:00,950 --> 00:21:02,040 It'll grow. 305 00:21:02,040 --> 00:21:04,300 It'll get out of shape. 306 00:21:04,300 --> 00:21:07,710 And you'll go to one of them big city doctors 307 00:21:07,710 --> 00:21:11,630 and he'll cut half your face off. 308 00:21:11,630 --> 00:21:13,260 Now it'll happen. 309 00:21:13,260 --> 00:21:16,200 It'll kill you, sorry as shit. 310 00:21:16,200 --> 00:21:18,000 [LAUGHING] 311 00:21:22,750 --> 00:21:27,080 But in your death, it'll still be in your mouths. 312 00:21:27,080 --> 00:21:28,500 [LAUGHING] 313 00:21:34,940 --> 00:21:40,790 For your sake, I hope it happens fast. 314 00:21:40,790 --> 00:21:45,120 It's dark times a coming. 315 00:21:45,120 --> 00:21:48,010 No long wait. 316 00:21:48,010 --> 00:21:50,720 Just around the corner. 317 00:21:50,720 --> 00:21:52,000 You'll see. 318 00:21:52,000 --> 00:21:55,640 You'll see. 319 00:21:55,640 --> 00:21:57,230 Look, studies prove it. 320 00:21:57,230 --> 00:21:58,300 No. 321 00:21:58,300 --> 00:22:00,410 Listen, one ounce has more protein 322 00:22:00,410 --> 00:22:01,780 than a five ounce t-bone. 323 00:22:01,780 --> 00:22:02,920 Sure. 324 00:22:02,920 --> 00:22:04,410 It's good for your skin. 325 00:22:04,410 --> 00:22:07,370 It's a natural amphetamine and, uh, I 326 00:22:07,370 --> 00:22:10,190 have it on good authority that it tastes exactly 327 00:22:10,190 --> 00:22:11,870 like a pineapple daiquiri. 328 00:22:11,870 --> 00:22:13,940 OK, I'll try it tonight. 329 00:22:13,940 --> 00:22:15,810 But if I don't like it, it'll be the last time. 330 00:22:15,810 --> 00:22:17,280 Yeah! 331 00:22:17,280 --> 00:22:20,630 Come on, let's take a break. 332 00:22:20,630 --> 00:22:22,520 I thought you were in a hurry to get to the campsite? 333 00:22:22,520 --> 00:22:24,410 Come on, Wilbur. We're not marching for town. 334 00:22:24,410 --> 00:22:25,720 Give us a fucking break. 335 00:22:25,720 --> 00:22:27,740 Yeah, we don't want to get too tired. 336 00:22:27,740 --> 00:22:29,510 Well, what do you say we take a little nap? 337 00:22:29,510 --> 00:22:32,300 Ooh, what do you say we take a big nap, baby? 338 00:22:32,300 --> 00:22:34,590 You know, I understand you have to exercise 339 00:22:34,590 --> 00:22:35,840 your manly hydraulics. 340 00:22:35,840 --> 00:22:38,340 But, uh, if you ever want to get to the campsite, 341 00:22:38,340 --> 00:22:40,080 you better come on down the trail. 342 00:22:40,080 --> 00:22:43,350 What's the matter with this place, since it's here? 343 00:22:43,350 --> 00:22:45,800 Yeah, it's a lot closer than anywhere else. 344 00:22:45,800 --> 00:22:47,700 WILBUR: This place is beaver shit, man! 345 00:22:47,700 --> 00:22:49,500 Besides, the place I'm taking you to 346 00:22:49,500 --> 00:22:53,690 is nicer than a debutante's ass shining in the moonlight. 347 00:22:53,690 --> 00:22:55,160 Yeah, if it's still there. 348 00:22:55,160 --> 00:22:56,690 I'm sure it's still there. 349 00:22:56,690 --> 00:23:00,040 My dad used to camp there when he was knee high to a piss ant. 350 00:23:00,040 --> 00:23:03,040 Besides, that's, uh, where my dad first nailed my mom. 351 00:23:03,040 --> 00:23:04,880 Wilbur, who told you that? 352 00:23:04,880 --> 00:23:05,710 My grandpa. 353 00:23:05,710 --> 00:23:08,580 Ah, yes, sweet redneck memories. 354 00:23:08,580 --> 00:23:09,970 Anyway, you're gonna love this place. 355 00:23:09,970 --> 00:23:13,850 It's a dynamite camping spot, and it's got a pond to piss in. 356 00:23:13,850 --> 00:23:15,200 Oh, sounds wonderful. 357 00:23:15,200 --> 00:23:16,820 Yeah, when you see it you'll wonder why 358 00:23:16,820 --> 00:23:18,810 you ever went anywhere else. 359 00:23:18,810 --> 00:23:21,220 Huh, I'm beginning to wonder why I ever wanted to go here. 360 00:23:21,220 --> 00:23:24,300 Oh, blow it out your ass. 361 00:23:24,300 --> 00:23:25,200 [FARTS] 362 00:23:25,200 --> 00:23:27,240 - Damn, [INAUDIBLE]. - Come on. 363 00:23:27,240 --> 00:23:30,080 We better get going, you know, before the trees start dying. 364 00:23:37,460 --> 00:23:40,910 Soldier, front and center, now! 365 00:23:40,910 --> 00:23:42,800 You lost the barrel. 366 00:23:42,800 --> 00:23:44,040 Have you lost your mind? 367 00:23:44,040 --> 00:23:45,430 Uh... 368 00:23:45,430 --> 00:23:47,110 Do you know what's in that barrel? 369 00:23:47,110 --> 00:23:48,980 Uh, but... 370 00:23:48,980 --> 00:23:50,320 Do you know where you lost it? 371 00:23:50,320 --> 00:23:51,750 Uh, yes, sir. 372 00:23:51,750 --> 00:23:55,100 Well, Robinson, why don't you go pick it up? 373 00:23:55,100 --> 00:23:57,500 Well, sir, there's this fat redneck elephant with a gun. 374 00:23:57,500 --> 00:23:59,800 I mean, this fat redneck with an elephant gun. 375 00:23:59,800 --> 00:24:01,540 Run, son! 376 00:24:01,540 --> 00:24:04,750 Unless you want your ass hanging in the stockade, 377 00:24:04,750 --> 00:24:07,710 you better get your ass back out there and get me that barrel. 378 00:24:07,710 --> 00:24:08,500 Uh, yes, sir. 379 00:24:08,500 --> 00:24:09,930 Can I take [INAUDIBLE], sir? 380 00:24:09,930 --> 00:24:12,960 Robinson, for what's in that barrel, 381 00:24:12,960 --> 00:24:16,240 you can take the whole motherfucking army. 382 00:24:19,200 --> 00:24:21,120 Robinson, where's your blouse? 383 00:24:21,120 --> 00:24:23,720 In the jeep, sir. 384 00:24:23,720 --> 00:24:28,110 You're a disgrace to the uniform, Robinson. 385 00:24:28,110 --> 00:24:29,660 Dismissed! 386 00:24:29,660 --> 00:24:32,170 Yes, sir. 387 00:24:32,170 --> 00:24:34,160 [SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC] 388 00:25:45,210 --> 00:25:47,180 Well I'll be damned. 389 00:25:47,180 --> 00:25:48,070 You said it. 390 00:25:48,070 --> 00:25:50,850 Here it is. 391 00:25:50,850 --> 00:25:53,770 LISA: (SARCASTICALLY) Well this is really nice. 392 00:25:53,770 --> 00:25:56,120 THERESA: Ground looks comfortable. 393 00:25:56,120 --> 00:25:57,930 ANDY: There's nice shade. 394 00:25:57,930 --> 00:25:59,500 WILBUR: Yeah, and a pond to piss in. 395 00:25:59,500 --> 00:26:02,270 LISA: It looks like a clay based sinkhole. 396 00:26:02,270 --> 00:26:03,770 Come on, let's set up. 397 00:26:08,420 --> 00:26:11,240 Well, all done, boys. 398 00:26:11,240 --> 00:26:14,550 Well, gotta go. 399 00:26:14,550 --> 00:26:16,570 Where are you going? 400 00:26:16,570 --> 00:26:18,420 I'm going fishing. 401 00:26:18,420 --> 00:26:19,590 Got worms? 402 00:26:19,590 --> 00:26:21,230 Yeah, but I'm going anyway. 403 00:26:21,230 --> 00:26:22,470 Now wait a minute, boys. 404 00:26:22,470 --> 00:26:24,760 As I seem to recollect, Elly May, 405 00:26:24,760 --> 00:26:26,990 it's your turn to do the delivering. 406 00:26:26,990 --> 00:26:27,750 But, Pa! 407 00:26:27,750 --> 00:26:29,200 Shut up, hog bowl. 408 00:26:29,200 --> 00:26:30,530 Yeah, opossum nut. 409 00:26:30,530 --> 00:26:34,130 Yeah, turtle, uh... 410 00:26:34,130 --> 00:26:35,290 But, Pa, that's going to take me 411 00:26:35,290 --> 00:26:36,680 all night to deliver all this. 412 00:26:36,680 --> 00:26:39,180 Quit your belly aching, Elly May, or else 413 00:26:39,180 --> 00:26:41,550 I ain't going to save any mash for you. 414 00:26:41,550 --> 00:26:44,380 I'm just going to save it for myself, and for your brothers, 415 00:26:44,380 --> 00:26:45,710 and for Ma. 416 00:26:45,710 --> 00:26:47,790 Maybe even some for Porky. 417 00:26:47,790 --> 00:26:49,660 Shouldn't give any to Ma. 418 00:26:49,660 --> 00:26:51,610 You know that stuff makes her crazy. 419 00:26:51,610 --> 00:26:53,770 You quit your sassing, boy. 420 00:26:53,770 --> 00:26:55,380 I pulled you out of your mother and I'll 421 00:26:55,380 --> 00:26:56,860 shove you right back in. 422 00:26:56,860 --> 00:26:59,920 Now you get in that truck and you skedaddle. 423 00:26:59,920 --> 00:27:01,810 Yes, Pa. 424 00:27:01,810 --> 00:27:04,070 And no drinking and driving! 425 00:27:04,070 --> 00:27:04,920 Yes, Pa. 426 00:27:08,350 --> 00:27:09,780 [LAUGHING] 427 00:27:16,130 --> 00:27:16,830 Woo! 428 00:27:21,540 --> 00:27:23,610 Shit the bed, this is great, Wilbur! 429 00:27:23,610 --> 00:27:26,100 See? I told you. 430 00:27:26,100 --> 00:27:28,110 But this water sure is cold. 431 00:27:28,110 --> 00:27:29,820 Woo. 432 00:27:29,820 --> 00:27:32,150 And it's deep, too. 433 00:27:32,150 --> 00:27:34,650 Boy, I'd sure like to knock the bottom out of that. 434 00:27:34,650 --> 00:27:37,290 Yeah, bottom, front, sides. 435 00:27:37,290 --> 00:27:39,760 You never know, she might turn out to be a nympho. 436 00:27:39,760 --> 00:27:43,120 One who gets turned on by big campfires. 437 00:27:43,120 --> 00:27:45,260 Well I got a log she can start with. 438 00:27:55,460 --> 00:27:57,130 Ah. 439 00:27:57,130 --> 00:27:58,920 Where's a good place to take a shit? 440 00:28:08,850 --> 00:28:10,890 Hi. 441 00:28:10,890 --> 00:28:13,560 Yo. 442 00:28:13,560 --> 00:28:15,990 Going far? 443 00:28:15,990 --> 00:28:18,740 Barbershop. 444 00:28:18,740 --> 00:28:20,560 Barbershop, eh? 445 00:28:20,560 --> 00:28:21,690 You work in that place? 446 00:28:21,690 --> 00:28:23,090 Yeah. Yeah, I work there. 447 00:28:23,090 --> 00:28:23,880 I'm the shaver. 448 00:28:28,030 --> 00:28:30,620 You give people shaves? 449 00:28:30,620 --> 00:28:32,190 Yeah. Yeah, yeah. 450 00:28:32,190 --> 00:28:34,170 Look, look. 451 00:28:34,170 --> 00:28:36,800 See? 452 00:28:36,800 --> 00:28:39,230 Hey, that-that's pretty good. 453 00:28:39,230 --> 00:28:41,870 That's good. 454 00:28:41,870 --> 00:28:45,220 You know, I heard about them, uh, them new electric shavers. 455 00:28:45,220 --> 00:28:47,650 No! No, no, they're no good. 456 00:28:47,650 --> 00:28:49,770 They're no good. Safety reasons. 457 00:28:49,770 --> 00:28:51,490 We're the best. 458 00:28:51,490 --> 00:28:54,730 Get a real good close shave. 459 00:28:54,730 --> 00:28:57,170 Hey, you need a shave? 460 00:28:57,170 --> 00:28:58,700 My brother, he gives hair cuts. 461 00:28:58,700 --> 00:29:01,390 He gives them real good. 462 00:29:01,390 --> 00:29:05,220 We'll give you shave and a haircut, for free. 463 00:29:05,220 --> 00:29:08,190 Uh, I don't need no shave or haircut, but I tell you, 464 00:29:08,190 --> 00:29:10,750 if I need one, I'll come right to you. 465 00:29:10,750 --> 00:29:12,530 [NERVOUS LAUGHTER] 466 00:29:17,760 --> 00:29:20,240 I got this razor. 467 00:29:20,240 --> 00:29:22,240 Put that thing away, boy. 468 00:29:22,240 --> 00:29:25,760 It's a good razor. 469 00:29:25,760 --> 00:29:27,860 BILLY BOB: Hey what... What you doing? 470 00:29:27,860 --> 00:29:29,490 Hey, cut that... hey. 471 00:29:29,490 --> 00:29:30,950 Hey, don't do that in my truck! 472 00:29:30,950 --> 00:29:33,440 Holy shit, man! Oh! 473 00:29:33,440 --> 00:29:34,930 Oh, god! 474 00:29:40,420 --> 00:29:43,290 You grubby god damn son of a bitch! 475 00:29:43,290 --> 00:29:46,070 You'll never get a free shave out of me, you asshole! 476 00:29:57,030 --> 00:29:59,210 That's the last hitch hiker I ever pick up. 477 00:30:16,740 --> 00:30:19,050 It's party time. LISA: Woo. 478 00:30:19,050 --> 00:30:21,620 THERESA: Hey. 479 00:30:21,620 --> 00:30:22,430 LISA: Colombian? 480 00:30:22,430 --> 00:30:24,380 ANDY: Jamaican? 481 00:30:24,380 --> 00:30:26,480 Only the best. 482 00:30:26,480 --> 00:30:27,940 New Jersey. 483 00:30:27,940 --> 00:30:29,440 THERESA: New Jersey? BOB: What exit? 484 00:30:33,410 --> 00:30:37,930 11 cases of swill gone to market, boys. 485 00:30:37,930 --> 00:30:41,970 This still's sure better. 486 00:30:41,970 --> 00:30:43,350 Now's our turn. 487 00:30:46,060 --> 00:30:47,780 Give me the first drink, Pa. 488 00:30:47,780 --> 00:30:50,280 Yeah, Pa, let's get loose. 489 00:30:53,530 --> 00:30:56,940 I'm rolling you a Tennessee torpedo. 490 00:30:56,940 --> 00:30:58,620 Man, that shit looks like cut grass. 491 00:31:01,920 --> 00:31:07,810 Boys, I got a deep down feeling this batch is going to be awful 492 00:31:07,810 --> 00:31:08,750 special. 493 00:31:08,750 --> 00:31:10,010 To our new still! 494 00:31:13,220 --> 00:31:14,190 [GAGGING] 495 00:31:16,620 --> 00:31:18,070 It tastes like fire, Pa! 496 00:31:20,980 --> 00:31:23,000 Hey, that's bigger than Lisa's dildo. 497 00:31:23,000 --> 00:31:25,330 LISA: Yeah and five times the size of your dick. 498 00:31:25,330 --> 00:31:26,720 ANDY: Come on, fire it up, man. 499 00:31:26,720 --> 00:31:28,260 Yeah, let's get naked and smoke. 500 00:31:33,240 --> 00:31:34,130 THERESA: Woo hoo! 501 00:31:47,290 --> 00:31:49,740 I like knockers. 502 00:31:49,740 --> 00:31:51,670 Yeah, I like knockers, too. 503 00:31:57,140 --> 00:31:58,760 [KNOCK ON DOOR] 504 00:31:58,760 --> 00:32:01,320 Somebody's knocking. 505 00:32:01,320 --> 00:32:04,350 Yeah, I like knockers, too. 506 00:32:04,350 --> 00:32:06,070 No, shit weed. 507 00:32:06,070 --> 00:32:08,270 There's someone knocking at the door! 508 00:32:08,270 --> 00:32:08,970 Oh. 509 00:32:14,810 --> 00:32:15,790 Hey, Elly. 510 00:32:15,790 --> 00:32:17,210 Hey, Smerd. 511 00:32:17,210 --> 00:32:18,010 How you doing? 512 00:32:18,010 --> 00:32:19,110 Got some shine for you. 513 00:32:19,110 --> 00:32:19,840 Great! 514 00:32:19,840 --> 00:32:22,370 You want to come in and watch some knockers? 515 00:32:22,370 --> 00:32:24,720 Uh, oh no thanks. 516 00:32:24,720 --> 00:32:26,460 I got a couple of my own. 517 00:32:26,460 --> 00:32:28,140 But I'll see you later. OK. 518 00:32:31,140 --> 00:32:32,140 Here, Berd. 519 00:32:32,140 --> 00:32:34,000 Ah, thanks, Smerd. 520 00:32:39,420 --> 00:32:40,370 [COUGHING] 521 00:32:46,040 --> 00:32:50,060 I-I feel funny, Pa. 522 00:32:50,060 --> 00:32:52,230 I feel a bit strange myself. 523 00:32:52,230 --> 00:32:54,700 [LAUGHING] 524 00:32:54,700 --> 00:32:55,690 [LAUGHING] 525 00:32:57,660 --> 00:32:58,650 [COUGHING] 526 00:32:58,650 --> 00:33:00,130 [LAUGHING] 527 00:33:05,570 --> 00:33:07,050 [MANIACAL LAUGHTER] 528 00:33:14,950 --> 00:33:16,930 Oh, shit. 529 00:33:16,930 --> 00:33:18,900 Did you treat this weed? 530 00:33:18,900 --> 00:33:20,610 Only with respect, baby. 531 00:33:20,610 --> 00:33:22,100 [GROUP LAUGHING] 532 00:33:25,350 --> 00:33:28,280 [LAUGHING] 533 00:33:28,280 --> 00:33:30,280 WILBUR: Yeah! Yeah! 534 00:33:30,280 --> 00:33:31,270 Aliens! 535 00:33:31,270 --> 00:33:32,270 Yeah! 536 00:33:32,270 --> 00:33:34,260 [LAUGHING] 537 00:33:34,260 --> 00:33:37,250 Aliens! 538 00:33:37,250 --> 00:33:40,730 Aliens! [INAUDIBLE] 539 00:33:44,720 --> 00:33:47,210 She says, three inches? 540 00:33:47,210 --> 00:33:50,650 And I said, yeah, from the floor. 541 00:33:50,650 --> 00:33:52,630 [HYSTERICAL LAUGHTER] 542 00:33:52,630 --> 00:33:54,610 [LAUGHING] 543 00:34:12,970 --> 00:34:17,930 I think... I think it's... Thinking liquor sipping dogs, 544 00:34:17,930 --> 00:34:18,920 bro. 545 00:34:18,920 --> 00:34:20,900 [LAUGHTER] 546 00:34:20,900 --> 00:34:28,340 [GASPING] 547 00:34:28,340 --> 00:34:30,860 ANDY: And I just about took a shit myself, 548 00:34:30,860 --> 00:34:34,430 when up walks Timothy Berry. 549 00:34:34,430 --> 00:34:38,150 [LAUGHING] 550 00:34:38,150 --> 00:34:41,150 [GROWLING] 551 00:34:41,150 --> 00:34:43,150 [ECHOING LAUGHTER] 552 00:34:58,620 --> 00:35:03,610 ANDY: Hey, Wilbur, couldn't you get something better than that? 553 00:35:03,610 --> 00:35:05,100 [HEAVY BREATHING] 554 00:35:05,100 --> 00:35:06,600 [HEARTBEAT] 555 00:35:10,090 --> 00:35:16,080 [GROWLING] 556 00:35:33,550 --> 00:35:35,040 [HEARTBEAT] 557 00:35:35,040 --> 00:35:37,040 [ECHOING VOICES] 558 00:35:40,030 --> 00:35:41,530 [LAUGHTER] 559 00:35:41,530 --> 00:35:43,530 [GROWLING] 560 00:36:33,400 --> 00:36:35,390 [ECHOING VOICES ON TV] 561 00:36:35,390 --> 00:36:36,380 [KNOCKING] 562 00:36:40,370 --> 00:36:41,070 Hi, Miss Ashley. 563 00:36:41,070 --> 00:36:43,000 Lamb's sakes, Elly May, I expected 564 00:36:43,000 --> 00:36:44,950 you to be here last night. 565 00:36:44,950 --> 00:36:48,030 Well, uh, we're a little bit behind and, um, 566 00:36:48,030 --> 00:36:48,830 and we got a new recipe. 567 00:36:48,830 --> 00:36:51,710 And, uh, and it's green. 568 00:36:51,710 --> 00:36:54,360 I guess that means I get a discount. 569 00:36:54,360 --> 00:36:57,250 Oh, I don't know about no discount, cuz uh, 570 00:36:57,250 --> 00:36:59,780 uh, cuz we built a new still. 571 00:36:59,780 --> 00:37:01,550 Oh. 572 00:37:01,550 --> 00:37:03,130 Well, all right this time. 573 00:37:03,130 --> 00:37:05,110 But I'll tell you Elly May, if you're 574 00:37:05,110 --> 00:37:06,880 going to be late like this next time, 575 00:37:06,880 --> 00:37:09,610 I'm going to do my buying from Ferd Mertz. 576 00:37:09,610 --> 00:37:11,570 Oh you don't want to buy it from him. 577 00:37:11,570 --> 00:37:13,390 Besides, you'll really like this. 578 00:37:13,390 --> 00:37:14,900 OK, here you are Elly May. 579 00:37:14,900 --> 00:37:15,800 Thank you. 580 00:37:15,800 --> 00:37:17,390 Bye, bye. Fester. 581 00:37:17,390 --> 00:37:19,660 Fester, honey, look, your bath can wait. 582 00:37:19,660 --> 00:37:20,840 Look what's here. 583 00:37:20,840 --> 00:37:22,270 Look. 584 00:37:22,270 --> 00:37:25,090 Look what we got. 585 00:37:25,090 --> 00:37:26,240 Here. 586 00:37:26,240 --> 00:37:27,940 Here you are, honey. 587 00:37:27,940 --> 00:37:29,130 Look, look, look. 588 00:37:29,130 --> 00:37:30,310 Here you are. 589 00:37:30,310 --> 00:37:31,070 Drink up. 590 00:37:31,070 --> 00:37:32,540 Down the hatch. 591 00:37:37,820 --> 00:37:39,310 [CRYING] 592 00:39:05,090 --> 00:39:05,790 Ahh! 593 00:39:20,330 --> 00:39:22,330 [MUFFLED CRIES] 594 00:39:52,700 --> 00:39:54,200 Sally! 595 00:39:54,200 --> 00:40:02,810 [GROWLING] [GRUNTING] 596 00:40:02,810 --> 00:40:05,260 Sally! Sally! 597 00:40:11,140 --> 00:40:19,340 - [GROWLING] [SNORTING] - Sally! 598 00:40:24,230 --> 00:40:30,590 [HEAVY BREATHING] 599 00:40:30,590 --> 00:40:32,050 Sally! 600 00:40:32,050 --> 00:41:05,060 [GROWLING] [SLURPING] 601 00:41:05,060 --> 00:41:07,200 Oh, now what do we have here? 602 00:41:07,200 --> 00:41:08,360 Uh... uh... 603 00:41:08,360 --> 00:41:10,890 Now, now, what's a little fillie like you doing 604 00:41:10,890 --> 00:41:15,550 in a place like this alone in the wilderness all 605 00:41:15,550 --> 00:41:18,060 by yourself in the morning... He- 606 00:41:18,060 --> 00:41:18,760 Alone? 607 00:41:18,760 --> 00:41:20,500 He... he killed my friend. 608 00:41:20,500 --> 00:41:23,810 Now, now, now, now, a little critter probably scared you. 609 00:41:23,810 --> 00:41:25,220 [GROWLING] 610 00:41:25,220 --> 00:41:27,410 Or maybe you were in shock. That's it. 611 00:41:27,410 --> 00:41:29,060 Now the first aid book says about shock, 612 00:41:29,060 --> 00:41:31,090 says the first thing we have to do is loosen up your clothes. 613 00:41:31,090 --> 00:41:33,050 So here, let me... let me help you loosen up your clothes. 614 00:41:33,050 --> 00:41:35,110 Now you just lay down here and let old Ferd protect you. 615 00:41:35,110 --> 00:41:35,800 Ahh! 616 00:41:39,050 --> 00:41:40,750 Jethro, old boy! 617 00:41:40,750 --> 00:41:41,690 How you doing? 618 00:41:45,470 --> 00:41:48,760 Looking, uh, might green around the gills. 619 00:41:48,760 --> 00:41:50,260 [GROWLING] 620 00:41:54,040 --> 00:41:55,270 Is this yours? 621 00:41:55,270 --> 00:42:05,550 [GROWLING] 622 00:42:05,550 --> 00:42:06,690 Here. 623 00:42:06,690 --> 00:42:19,330 [WHISTLING] Ahh! 624 00:42:35,450 --> 00:43:09,880 [SLURPING] [BELCH] 625 00:43:09,880 --> 00:43:11,180 Phew. 626 00:43:11,180 --> 00:43:13,720 Ooh, nelly, just what I could use, a drink. 627 00:43:16,860 --> 00:43:19,140 Too bad it's this Clemsen jizz. 628 00:43:19,140 --> 00:43:21,110 Oh, mama said not to swear. 629 00:43:25,050 --> 00:43:27,510 Oh, sweet mama, take a bath. 630 00:43:27,510 --> 00:43:29,980 Ooh. Ehh. 631 00:43:34,290 --> 00:43:38,220 Well I'll be dipped in hog snot and perish the thought. 632 00:43:38,220 --> 00:43:40,670 That's their secret ingredient. 633 00:43:40,670 --> 00:43:43,050 Those nasty boys. 634 00:43:43,050 --> 00:43:44,820 Well at least I don't have to put a bag over her head 635 00:43:44,820 --> 00:43:46,740 this time. 636 00:43:46,740 --> 00:43:50,370 Don't even think about that. 637 00:43:50,370 --> 00:43:52,030 I really need myself a drink now. 638 00:44:05,000 --> 00:44:06,880 Oh well, hope I don't go blind. 639 00:44:25,270 --> 00:44:28,440 Land sakes! 640 00:44:28,440 --> 00:44:32,390 They got their nerve lollygagging around all hours 641 00:44:32,390 --> 00:44:33,550 of the morning. 642 00:44:33,550 --> 00:44:35,080 They got a drunk on. 643 00:44:35,080 --> 00:44:37,970 Boy they got that mash to town. 644 00:44:37,970 --> 00:44:41,190 I'll brown them! 645 00:44:41,190 --> 00:44:42,710 Sorry, Porky. 646 00:44:42,710 --> 00:44:45,420 Didn't mean to scare you none. 647 00:44:45,420 --> 00:44:48,130 You know you don't have to worry about your bacon 648 00:44:48,130 --> 00:44:49,570 ending up in here. 649 00:44:49,570 --> 00:44:51,720 Not you. 650 00:44:51,720 --> 00:44:55,500 Let's mosey on down to the still and give them men folk 651 00:44:55,500 --> 00:44:56,360 what for! 652 00:45:07,320 --> 00:45:10,910 Hey, Andy, where's Sally and Theresa? 653 00:45:10,910 --> 00:45:11,610 I don't know. 654 00:45:11,610 --> 00:45:14,340 I've been up a half hour and I haven't seen them. 655 00:45:14,340 --> 00:45:15,430 What? 656 00:45:15,430 --> 00:45:16,580 What's going on? 657 00:45:16,580 --> 00:45:19,080 Theresa and Sally are missing. 658 00:45:19,080 --> 00:45:20,080 Missing? 659 00:45:20,080 --> 00:45:21,780 WILBUR: Oh, they're not missing. 660 00:45:21,780 --> 00:45:23,510 They just wandered off somewhere. 661 00:45:23,510 --> 00:45:25,190 Well maybe somebody should go look for them. 662 00:45:25,190 --> 00:45:27,980 I mean, they could have gotten lost. 663 00:45:27,980 --> 00:45:29,250 They're not lost. 664 00:45:29,250 --> 00:45:30,350 Don't know what they'd want to go 665 00:45:30,350 --> 00:45:32,050 off by themselves for anyway. 666 00:45:32,050 --> 00:45:35,050 Well maybe they're exploring. 667 00:45:35,050 --> 00:45:36,620 Maybe they're a couple of damn dykes. 668 00:45:36,620 --> 00:45:38,540 Oh. 669 00:45:38,540 --> 00:45:40,570 Sure wish I were a Dutch boy. 670 00:45:40,570 --> 00:45:42,070 [WHISTLING] 671 00:45:54,280 --> 00:45:56,120 Hey look, Ben, there's Dad's moonshine. 672 00:45:56,120 --> 00:45:57,150 Let's drink some. 673 00:45:57,150 --> 00:45:58,490 We'll get in trouble. 674 00:45:58,490 --> 00:45:59,190 It doesn't matter. 675 00:45:59,190 --> 00:46:00,740 No one's home and he'll never know. 676 00:46:00,740 --> 00:46:02,460 All right, so you could drink it first. 677 00:46:02,460 --> 00:46:03,690 No, I'm not going to drink it first. 678 00:46:03,690 --> 00:46:05,670 You drink it first. Are you chicken? 679 00:46:26,730 --> 00:46:28,220 [PIG SQUEALING] 680 00:46:28,220 --> 00:46:29,720 Jed? 681 00:46:29,720 --> 00:46:31,210 Jethro! 682 00:46:31,210 --> 00:46:33,190 Junior! Elly! 683 00:46:36,670 --> 00:46:39,160 Where'd them boys go, Porky? 684 00:46:39,160 --> 00:46:43,500 They've been gone since yesterday morn. 685 00:46:43,500 --> 00:46:47,120 Looks to me like they finished a new batch. 686 00:46:47,120 --> 00:46:50,770 And if'n I'm right, they built themselves a new still, too. 687 00:47:08,480 --> 00:47:10,720 I'll be dipped. 688 00:47:10,720 --> 00:47:13,820 This sure is some powerful shine. 689 00:47:13,820 --> 00:47:15,800 And it's green. 690 00:47:15,800 --> 00:47:18,410 Jed must've changed the recipe. 691 00:47:18,410 --> 00:47:22,810 If this stuff works like it smells, Jed and the boys 692 00:47:22,810 --> 00:47:25,560 must be wandering on a bender, they must. 693 00:47:25,560 --> 00:47:29,710 Well, Porky, I think we just better take his jar 694 00:47:29,710 --> 00:47:31,630 home before we sample it. 695 00:47:31,630 --> 00:47:32,760 Come on, let's go. 696 00:47:39,040 --> 00:47:41,810 I'm hungry. 697 00:47:41,810 --> 00:47:44,780 And the first thing I'm going to do when we find these girls is 698 00:47:44,780 --> 00:47:48,660 give Theresa a real good ass chewing for not fixing 699 00:47:48,660 --> 00:47:50,150 breakfast the way she promised. 700 00:47:50,150 --> 00:47:53,390 Oh this is a fine time to be thinking about breakfast. 701 00:47:53,390 --> 00:47:55,110 They must be pretty far away not 702 00:47:55,110 --> 00:47:56,420 to hear us yelling for them. 703 00:47:56,420 --> 00:47:58,710 They must really be lost. You know what weird? 704 00:47:58,710 --> 00:48:01,420 It's like everything looks like it's dying around here. 705 00:48:01,420 --> 00:48:04,060 Well if they're playing opossum to try to scare us, 706 00:48:04,060 --> 00:48:07,090 I... oh, Lisa, don't look. Don't look. 707 00:48:07,090 --> 00:48:08,030 - What? - Don't look. 708 00:48:08,030 --> 00:48:08,950 What? 709 00:48:08,950 --> 00:48:09,860 What? 710 00:48:09,860 --> 00:48:10,780 What is it? 711 00:48:10,780 --> 00:48:12,160 What is it? 712 00:48:12,160 --> 00:48:13,420 Oh, god, is that a person? 713 00:48:13,420 --> 00:48:14,910 BOB: It's... it's... 714 00:48:14,910 --> 00:48:15,910 Let me go! 715 00:48:15,910 --> 00:48:17,400 BOB: Theresa! 716 00:48:17,400 --> 00:48:19,390 What happened to her? LISA: Ahh! 717 00:48:19,390 --> 00:48:20,390 She's dead, man. 718 00:48:20,390 --> 00:48:24,370 She's fucking dead. 719 00:48:24,370 --> 00:48:27,360 ANDY: What happened to her own head? 720 00:48:27,360 --> 00:48:29,350 What was she fucking doing? 721 00:48:29,350 --> 00:48:30,350 Ahh! 722 00:48:30,350 --> 00:48:31,840 Look, man! 723 00:48:31,840 --> 00:48:34,330 Maybe that... maybe that's not Theresa. 724 00:48:34,330 --> 00:48:36,820 She's wearing fucking designer jeans. 725 00:48:36,820 --> 00:48:37,820 ANDY: And that's my t-shirt. 726 00:48:37,820 --> 00:48:40,310 Well what happened to her! 727 00:48:40,310 --> 00:48:41,300 WILBUR: Maybe it was a bear. 728 00:48:41,300 --> 00:48:42,800 What is that! 729 00:48:42,800 --> 00:48:44,790 What kind of bear would do this, man? 730 00:48:44,790 --> 00:48:46,780 ANDY: Holy shit. 731 00:48:46,780 --> 00:48:50,270 She's nothing but a fucking stain. 732 00:48:50,270 --> 00:48:52,750 Oh, god, where's Sally? 733 00:48:52,750 --> 00:48:53,750 ANDY: Oh, Sally, that's right. 734 00:48:53,750 --> 00:48:54,750 We've got to find her! 735 00:48:54,750 --> 00:48:56,240 We've got to find Sally. 736 00:48:56,240 --> 00:48:58,730 (CRYING) We've got to bury Theresa. 737 00:49:02,720 --> 00:49:04,380 WILBUR: Theresa's gone now, but that... that 738 00:49:04,380 --> 00:49:06,200 doesn't mean that Sally's dead. 739 00:49:06,200 --> 00:49:07,760 You know? 740 00:49:07,760 --> 00:49:10,220 If it was a bear, it might return to it's kill area. 741 00:49:10,220 --> 00:49:13,430 But either way, I don't think we should split up. 742 00:49:13,430 --> 00:49:15,870 If you want to stay, you stay alone. 743 00:49:15,870 --> 00:49:18,470 So what's it going to be? 744 00:49:18,470 --> 00:49:21,510 Fuck you, Wilbur, we're going to bury her. 745 00:49:21,510 --> 00:49:23,010 [CRYING] 746 00:49:47,960 --> 00:49:49,950 [WOMAN CRYING] 747 00:49:53,940 --> 00:49:54,940 [KNOCKING] 748 00:49:54,940 --> 00:49:56,440 JAKE: Come in. 749 00:49:56,440 --> 00:49:58,430 [MUFFLED CRIES] 750 00:50:11,410 --> 00:50:12,910 Hi, Elly. 751 00:50:12,910 --> 00:50:14,400 Where you been? 752 00:50:14,400 --> 00:50:16,010 What took you so long? 753 00:50:19,160 --> 00:50:21,550 Sorry, but, uh, we were running a little late tonight. 754 00:50:21,550 --> 00:50:26,520 And, uh, tell you what, we got some special stuff this time. 755 00:50:26,520 --> 00:50:29,020 You stay right there. 756 00:50:29,020 --> 00:50:33,750 I'll have to get some money and I'll be right back. 757 00:50:33,750 --> 00:50:35,750 [WOMAN CRYING] 758 00:51:30,530 --> 00:51:34,040 Here's your money. 759 00:51:34,040 --> 00:51:36,710 Thanks, Jake. 760 00:51:36,710 --> 00:51:38,310 Here you go. 761 00:51:38,310 --> 00:51:40,750 Have a nice day. 762 00:51:40,750 --> 00:51:45,080 [LAUGHING] 763 00:51:45,080 --> 00:51:48,900 [MUFFLED CRIES] 764 00:51:48,900 --> 00:51:49,870 WILBUR: Sally! 765 00:51:49,870 --> 00:51:52,310 LISA: Sal! 766 00:51:52,310 --> 00:51:53,790 Sally? 767 00:51:53,790 --> 00:51:54,490 Sally! 768 00:51:54,490 --> 00:51:56,580 Hey guys, check this out. 769 00:51:56,580 --> 00:51:57,980 Is that a still? Huh. 770 00:51:57,980 --> 00:51:59,030 Sure is, man. 771 00:51:59,030 --> 00:52:01,900 They been making mash out here since time began. 772 00:52:01,900 --> 00:52:04,850 Oh, man, this is too weird. 773 00:52:04,850 --> 00:52:06,670 You guys do what you want to do. 774 00:52:06,670 --> 00:52:08,990 I'm going over here and I'm going to freak out. 775 00:52:08,990 --> 00:52:11,200 LISA: Bob, get your shit together. 776 00:52:11,200 --> 00:52:12,580 Look, to hell with this thing. 777 00:52:12,580 --> 00:52:16,380 We have to find Sally. 778 00:52:16,380 --> 00:52:18,300 Oh, shit. Shit. 779 00:52:18,300 --> 00:52:20,100 - What is it now? - Shit. 780 00:52:20,100 --> 00:52:21,300 Shit. Shit. 781 00:52:21,300 --> 00:52:22,790 Shit. Shit. 782 00:52:22,790 --> 00:52:24,790 What? What is it? 783 00:52:24,790 --> 00:52:26,790 Oh, shit. 784 00:52:26,790 --> 00:52:28,320 It's Sally. 785 00:52:28,320 --> 00:52:30,680 I'm drinking this shit. 786 00:52:30,680 --> 00:52:31,570 Are you nuts? 787 00:52:31,570 --> 00:52:33,740 That stuff could kill you. 788 00:52:33,740 --> 00:52:35,540 WILBUR: Man, this bear is getting around, man. 789 00:52:35,540 --> 00:52:36,820 We gotta get out of here. 790 00:52:36,820 --> 00:52:37,750 LISA: Wilbur's right. 791 00:52:37,750 --> 00:52:39,300 If there is a wild bear around here, 792 00:52:39,300 --> 00:52:41,020 we've got to get a move on. 793 00:52:41,020 --> 00:52:42,470 Let's beat feet. 794 00:52:42,470 --> 00:52:43,560 I don't think it's a bear. 795 00:52:43,560 --> 00:52:44,450 What? 796 00:52:44,450 --> 00:52:45,630 I don't think it's a bear. 797 00:52:45,630 --> 00:52:46,410 Look, geek... 798 00:52:46,410 --> 00:52:48,430 Look, blow me, moron. 799 00:52:48,430 --> 00:52:50,770 Listen, this barrel is still warm 800 00:52:50,770 --> 00:52:52,660 and these tracks around here are still fresh. 801 00:52:52,660 --> 00:52:54,530 If there was a bear around here, why didn't it 802 00:52:54,530 --> 00:52:55,950 get the owner of this still? 803 00:52:55,950 --> 00:52:58,170 Why aren't there any bear tracks? 804 00:52:58,170 --> 00:53:00,640 You mean people did this? 805 00:53:00,640 --> 00:53:03,290 Wilbur, you're the damn mountain man. 806 00:53:03,290 --> 00:53:05,080 Why didn't you figure any of this out? 807 00:53:05,080 --> 00:53:08,410 What are you doing, feeding us to your cousins or something? 808 00:53:08,410 --> 00:53:09,850 You're setting us up. 809 00:53:09,850 --> 00:53:11,380 That's what you're doing. You're setting us up. 810 00:53:11,380 --> 00:53:12,100 Hey, fuck you, Bob. 811 00:53:12,100 --> 00:53:13,880 I haven't been here in 10 years. 812 00:53:13,880 --> 00:53:15,330 You're setting us up, man. 813 00:53:15,330 --> 00:53:17,500 You killed Theresa and you killed Sally. 814 00:53:17,500 --> 00:53:18,380 Get off! 815 00:53:18,380 --> 00:53:19,260 LISA: Stop it! 816 00:53:19,260 --> 00:53:21,080 Stop it! ANDY: Shut up! 817 00:53:21,080 --> 00:53:21,900 Shut the fuck up! 818 00:53:21,900 --> 00:53:22,670 Look what it says here. 819 00:53:22,670 --> 00:53:27,520 It says, Caution, US military chemical warfare nuclear waste. 820 00:53:27,520 --> 00:53:28,750 Use no hooks. 821 00:53:28,750 --> 00:53:31,630 You mean these rednecks are drinking that shit? 822 00:53:31,630 --> 00:53:33,630 No, I don't think anyone could be that stupid, 823 00:53:33,630 --> 00:53:35,460 but I think the residue from this barrel 824 00:53:35,460 --> 00:53:37,180 was enough to set things in motion. 825 00:53:37,180 --> 00:53:39,700 Little dab will do here, if you know what I mean. 826 00:53:39,700 --> 00:53:40,500 Better than you think. 827 00:53:40,500 --> 00:53:42,540 WILBUR: (ECHOING) What are you talking about, Andy? 828 00:53:42,540 --> 00:53:45,140 ANDY: (ECHOING) Oh, you guys are thick. 829 00:53:45,140 --> 00:53:48,050 Look, there were chemicals in this barrel. 830 00:53:48,050 --> 00:53:50,820 The chemicals got in to the moonshine. 831 00:53:50,820 --> 00:53:52,320 You'd think that it would kill them, 832 00:53:52,320 --> 00:53:53,710 but my guess is that it just turned 833 00:53:53,710 --> 00:53:55,280 them into horrible maniacs. 834 00:53:55,280 --> 00:53:57,900 Y-You mean that th-this moonshine... 835 00:53:57,900 --> 00:54:03,290 That's right... monster mash. 836 00:54:03,290 --> 00:54:05,250 Ooh. 837 00:54:05,250 --> 00:54:06,310 [COUNTRY MUSIC] 838 00:54:48,090 --> 00:54:50,580 Tyrone, I can't believe you lost that barrel. 839 00:54:50,580 --> 00:54:52,520 I was supposed to go to the Pink Hippo tonight, 840 00:54:52,520 --> 00:54:55,850 but now my day's ruined because of your stupidity. 841 00:54:55,850 --> 00:54:57,270 Fuck you. 842 00:54:57,270 --> 00:55:00,230 Hey, Ty, we going to get to shoot anybody? 843 00:55:00,230 --> 00:55:01,650 There's a distinct possibility. 844 00:55:01,650 --> 00:55:03,910 You mean there's going to be fighting? 845 00:55:03,910 --> 00:55:05,240 Ty, how could you? 846 00:55:05,240 --> 00:55:07,270 What if I break a nail? 847 00:55:07,270 --> 00:55:08,230 Fuck you. 848 00:55:11,090 --> 00:55:13,900 Well, what should we do now? 849 00:55:13,900 --> 00:55:14,730 Well that's up to you. 850 00:55:14,730 --> 00:55:16,230 We've got to get the hell out of here. 851 00:55:16,230 --> 00:55:17,540 Fuck that, man. 852 00:55:17,540 --> 00:55:19,610 I'm not following this son of a bitch anywhere. 853 00:55:19,610 --> 00:55:20,380 Stop it, Bob. 854 00:55:20,380 --> 00:55:21,510 I ain't taking no more of this shit. 855 00:55:21,510 --> 00:55:22,760 Why don't you deal with your own fucking problems? 856 00:55:22,760 --> 00:55:23,930 You're my problem, bastard! 857 00:55:40,850 --> 00:55:41,680 Stop it. 858 00:55:41,680 --> 00:55:42,710 Stop it! 859 00:55:42,710 --> 00:55:43,750 Stop it! 860 00:55:43,750 --> 00:55:45,810 Stop it! Stop it! 861 00:55:55,000 --> 00:55:56,510 I don't believe you two. 862 00:55:56,510 --> 00:55:58,040 What the hell is your problem? 863 00:55:58,040 --> 00:56:01,130 We have to stick together, not try and pull each other apart. 864 00:56:01,130 --> 00:56:02,390 I don't believe this! 865 00:56:02,390 --> 00:56:04,990 We're in the middle of a crisis situation here 866 00:56:04,990 --> 00:56:07,600 and I'm watching the battle of the macho jerks! 867 00:56:07,600 --> 00:56:09,240 Well let me tell you something. 868 00:56:09,240 --> 00:56:12,460 I don't care how macho or how strong you are, 869 00:56:12,460 --> 00:56:16,400 it's not going to do one think to protect us from this. 870 00:56:16,400 --> 00:56:20,780 Now Bob, I don't know what the hell your problem is, but you 871 00:56:20,780 --> 00:56:22,330 better pull it together if you don't 872 00:56:22,330 --> 00:56:24,870 want to end up as tomorrow's blue plate special. 873 00:56:24,870 --> 00:56:26,360 And you. 874 00:56:26,360 --> 00:56:28,310 You better come to the realization 875 00:56:28,310 --> 00:56:29,850 that you have been away from home way 876 00:56:29,850 --> 00:56:33,710 too long to know what the hell's going on around here. 877 00:56:33,710 --> 00:56:36,540 Now I think we ought to just turn everything over to Andy, 878 00:56:36,540 --> 00:56:39,370 since he seems to be the only one of you assholes 879 00:56:39,370 --> 00:56:42,130 who's still thinking clearly. 880 00:56:42,130 --> 00:56:46,740 I am right on the edge of clawing my eyes out and-and 881 00:56:46,740 --> 00:56:50,500 and slitting my wrists. 882 00:56:50,500 --> 00:56:56,380 Now Andy, tell me, what are we going to do? 883 00:57:01,780 --> 00:57:02,760 [GROWLING] 884 00:57:02,760 --> 00:57:06,230 - Oh, no! - Aah! 885 00:57:06,230 --> 00:57:13,310 [GROWLING] 886 00:57:13,310 --> 00:57:17,260 [SCREAMING] 887 00:57:17,260 --> 00:57:19,230 [SCREAMS ECHOING] 888 00:57:44,190 --> 00:57:49,140 [CRYING] 889 00:57:49,140 --> 00:57:54,090 [GAGGING] 890 00:57:54,090 --> 00:58:02,510 [WHIMPERING] 891 00:58:02,510 --> 00:58:05,480 Any more fucking bright ideas? 892 00:58:05,480 --> 00:58:07,240 BOB: Well, we got to do something. 893 00:58:07,240 --> 00:58:09,640 Oh, god, I wish I was home. 894 00:58:09,640 --> 00:58:11,240 (HIGH PITCHED VOICE) There's no place like home. 895 00:58:11,240 --> 00:58:12,550 Toto, Toto! 896 00:58:12,550 --> 00:58:14,410 And your little dog, too! 897 00:58:14,410 --> 00:58:19,110 [CACKLES] [BARKS] [PANTING] 898 00:58:19,110 --> 00:58:20,840 WILBUR: Chill out, Bob. 899 00:58:20,840 --> 00:58:23,350 We sure as shit can't stay here, man. 900 00:58:23,350 --> 00:58:25,600 Besides, there might be more of these things. 901 00:58:25,600 --> 00:58:29,090 Look, there's a mineshaft over that clearing over there. 902 00:58:29,090 --> 00:58:30,190 We could be safe there. 903 00:58:30,190 --> 00:58:32,150 Underground? 904 00:58:32,150 --> 00:58:35,090 Underground. 905 00:58:35,090 --> 00:58:38,090 Come on, let's go. 906 00:58:38,090 --> 00:58:39,140 Get your shit together. 907 00:58:39,140 --> 00:58:40,150 Give me a hand here. 908 00:58:40,150 --> 00:58:41,940 What are we taking him for? 909 00:58:41,940 --> 00:58:43,910 Look, just grab a leg and I'll tell you later. 910 00:58:43,910 --> 00:58:46,160 Come on. Come on. 911 00:58:46,160 --> 00:58:46,980 Pull. 912 00:58:46,980 --> 00:58:47,680 That's it. 913 00:58:49,860 --> 00:58:51,240 This isn't so bad. 914 00:58:51,240 --> 00:58:52,790 Come on, Toto. 915 00:58:52,790 --> 00:58:53,490 Atta boy. 916 00:58:53,490 --> 00:58:54,300 Come on. 917 00:58:54,300 --> 00:58:55,480 Atta boy. Heel, heel! 918 00:58:55,480 --> 00:58:56,180 Walkies. 919 00:59:00,440 --> 00:59:01,140 WILBUR: Shit. 920 00:59:05,060 --> 00:59:06,560 Shit! 921 00:59:06,560 --> 00:59:08,560 (WHIMPERING) I got it! 922 00:59:08,560 --> 00:59:09,560 I got it! 923 00:59:09,560 --> 00:59:10,910 Ow! 924 00:59:10,910 --> 00:59:11,640 WILBUR: What was that? 925 00:59:16,540 --> 00:59:18,990 It's a hurricane lamp. 926 00:59:18,990 --> 00:59:20,330 WILBUR: Well, go ahead and light it. 927 00:59:24,990 --> 00:59:27,250 Ew, this thing's filthy. 928 00:59:30,130 --> 00:59:32,740 Ah, shiny. 929 00:59:36,080 --> 00:59:39,010 Well, we've got light. 930 00:59:39,010 --> 00:59:39,830 Very good, Bob. 931 00:59:43,550 --> 00:59:46,420 OK, now what? 932 00:59:46,420 --> 00:59:51,690 Bob, do an autopsy on this thing. 933 00:59:51,690 --> 00:59:53,690 What? 934 00:59:53,690 --> 00:59:54,760 No way! 935 00:59:54,760 --> 00:59:56,290 WILBUR: Hey come on, man. You're pre med. 936 00:59:56,290 --> 00:59:57,400 I'm pre vet! 937 00:59:57,400 --> 00:59:58,170 What's the difference? 938 00:59:58,170 --> 00:59:59,980 I do autopsies on cats, man! 939 00:59:59,980 --> 01:00:03,950 Well think of it as a big cat. 940 01:00:03,950 --> 01:00:05,450 All right. 941 01:00:05,450 --> 01:00:06,150 All right. 942 01:00:06,150 --> 01:00:08,290 Out with it. 943 01:00:08,290 --> 01:00:11,260 I'll tell you. 944 01:00:11,260 --> 01:00:15,340 Remember that little bitty bitty piece of acid I was saving? 945 01:00:17,920 --> 01:00:18,890 Yeah. 946 01:00:18,890 --> 01:00:19,840 What about it? 947 01:00:19,840 --> 01:00:29,320 Well, I woke up and I said to myself, Bob. 948 01:00:29,320 --> 01:00:32,330 Bob, I said to myself, Bob... that's-that's me. 949 01:00:32,330 --> 01:00:38,690 Bob, oh, what a beautiful morning. 950 01:00:38,690 --> 01:00:44,950 And you may not have noticed this, but I took it. 951 01:00:44,950 --> 01:00:46,940 Christ! 952 01:00:46,940 --> 01:00:49,430 I was only going to trip a little bit. 953 01:00:49,430 --> 01:00:51,410 Not a lot, just a little. 954 01:00:51,410 --> 01:00:54,600 I was going to trip over all the bears, and the trees, 955 01:00:54,600 --> 01:00:57,060 and the flowers, and the insects, and the sky, 956 01:00:57,060 --> 01:01:01,000 and the universe all wrapped up into one little... 957 01:01:01,000 --> 01:01:02,470 Are you out of your mind? 958 01:01:02,470 --> 01:01:03,950 This is no time to trip! 959 01:01:03,950 --> 01:01:05,960 I didn't know this shit would happen. 960 01:01:05,960 --> 01:01:07,900 I mean, who could? 961 01:01:07,900 --> 01:01:08,870 Hm? 962 01:01:08,870 --> 01:01:11,850 [LAUGHING] Who's laughing? 963 01:01:11,850 --> 01:01:12,770 Stop laughing at me. 964 01:01:12,770 --> 01:01:15,510 Bob! 965 01:01:15,510 --> 01:01:17,750 I did it this morning. 966 01:01:17,750 --> 01:01:20,560 I thought it'd be over by now. 967 01:01:20,560 --> 01:01:25,270 I thought I was at my highest an hour ago. 968 01:01:25,270 --> 01:01:29,260 (ECHOING) But I'm still tripping. 969 01:01:29,260 --> 01:01:30,660 (ECHOING) You know what man? 970 01:01:30,660 --> 01:01:32,270 (ECHOING) Talk about bad timing. 971 01:01:32,270 --> 01:01:33,660 (ECHOING) Acid. 972 01:01:33,660 --> 01:01:35,090 How can you take that kind of crap? 973 01:01:35,090 --> 01:01:36,000 Damn fool. 974 01:01:36,000 --> 01:01:37,360 (ECHOING) This is just great. 975 01:01:37,360 --> 01:01:39,850 You know, we're not going to know where to be. 976 01:01:39,850 --> 01:01:41,340 We ought to just leave you here! 977 01:01:41,340 --> 01:01:43,080 (ECHOING) You want to be drugged out 978 01:01:43,080 --> 01:01:44,320 and talking about me, you jerk? 979 01:01:44,320 --> 01:01:46,230 What the hell is going on in your mind, man? 980 01:01:46,230 --> 01:01:47,830 (ECHOING) But you are going to do this autopsy, 981 01:01:47,830 --> 01:01:49,970 Bob, because we're in an emergency situation, here. 982 01:01:49,970 --> 01:01:52,310 You can't just close your eyes for this. 983 01:01:52,310 --> 01:01:53,350 BOB: (ECHOING) You want to bet? 984 01:01:55,850 --> 01:01:57,790 [VOICES ECHOING] 985 01:02:09,920 --> 01:02:12,660 WILBUR: Wake up! 986 01:02:12,660 --> 01:02:16,040 (ECHOING) Now slice him open. 987 01:02:21,340 --> 01:02:24,130 But I don't have any instruments. 988 01:02:24,130 --> 01:02:24,900 WILBUR: (ECHOING) Here. 989 01:02:46,500 --> 01:02:48,200 WILBUR: Stop fucking around. 990 01:02:51,420 --> 01:02:52,150 LISA: (ECHOING) Hurry! 991 01:03:07,460 --> 01:03:08,450 Oh, man. 992 01:03:08,450 --> 01:03:13,920 Uh, god, this zombie skin is the toughest. 993 01:03:19,180 --> 01:03:19,880 Ew. 994 01:03:22,860 --> 01:03:25,870 Ew, what is in here? 995 01:03:25,870 --> 01:03:27,210 Oh, god. 996 01:03:27,210 --> 01:03:32,040 Oh, my god, what... Oh, this... ew. 997 01:03:32,040 --> 01:03:33,520 Yuck. 998 01:03:33,520 --> 01:03:34,510 Ew, yuck. 999 01:03:34,510 --> 01:03:36,980 Ew, yucky, yucky. 1000 01:03:36,980 --> 01:03:39,940 Yuck. What? 1001 01:03:42,910 --> 01:03:44,470 (ECHOING) What's this? 1002 01:03:44,470 --> 01:03:45,860 I-I don't believe it. 1003 01:03:45,860 --> 01:03:49,840 I don't believe... what in the wor... will you look at this? 1004 01:03:49,840 --> 01:03:52,140 I mean, OK, all right. 1005 01:03:52,140 --> 01:03:53,090 So what? 1006 01:03:53,090 --> 01:03:56,000 It's light, it's less filling, but hey, it 1007 01:03:56,000 --> 01:03:57,120 could have been recycled. 1008 01:03:57,120 --> 01:03:59,810 I don't believe it. 1009 01:03:59,810 --> 01:04:01,280 What else is in here? 1010 01:04:01,280 --> 01:04:02,250 Ah. 1011 01:04:02,250 --> 01:04:04,930 Where did this come from? 1012 01:04:04,930 --> 01:04:07,650 Where do you suppo... yeah. 1013 01:04:07,650 --> 01:04:09,690 Some poor Appalachian man, I think, 1014 01:04:09,690 --> 01:04:11,630 is going around, wandering around 1015 01:04:11,630 --> 01:04:14,080 the mountains without a shoe. 1016 01:04:14,080 --> 01:04:16,890 Can you believe that he's going around without a shoe? 1017 01:04:16,890 --> 01:04:17,890 What? 1018 01:04:17,890 --> 01:04:18,890 Now what's this? 1019 01:04:18,890 --> 01:04:20,370 What's this? 1020 01:04:20,370 --> 01:04:21,540 Help. 1021 01:04:21,540 --> 01:04:22,980 Ew. 1022 01:04:22,980 --> 01:04:24,420 Huh. 1023 01:04:24,420 --> 01:04:28,050 Now how do you suppose this got in the colon? 1024 01:04:28,050 --> 01:04:30,210 I don't... I can't imagine. 1025 01:04:30,210 --> 01:04:32,840 Well, you know, I do think it might... nah. 1026 01:04:32,840 --> 01:04:39,530 But... ah, hey, hey, now this, I like this. 1027 01:04:39,530 --> 01:04:41,020 Oh, yeah. 1028 01:04:41,020 --> 01:04:42,380 Oh, ho, ho. 1029 01:04:42,380 --> 01:04:46,350 Oh now this, this I'm going to keep for myself. 1030 01:04:46,350 --> 01:04:48,200 I like that. 1031 01:04:48,200 --> 01:04:49,170 What else do we have in here? 1032 01:04:49,170 --> 01:04:50,540 Yeah, I think I'm going to climb in here. 1033 01:04:50,540 --> 01:04:52,400 Well, no, no, I won't climb in just yet, 1034 01:04:52,400 --> 01:04:55,940 but well... look, it's... Believe me, it's big in here. 1035 01:04:55,940 --> 01:04:58,120 I mean, it's as big as an amusement park in here. 1036 01:04:58,120 --> 01:04:59,600 I love it. I love it. 1037 01:04:59,600 --> 01:05:00,880 Hey, look! 1038 01:05:00,880 --> 01:05:02,570 There's the roller coaster. 1039 01:05:02,570 --> 01:05:03,540 That's a roller coaster. 1040 01:05:03,540 --> 01:05:06,460 Hey, hey, hey, and there's the Ferris wheel. 1041 01:05:06,460 --> 01:05:07,430 I love it in here. 1042 01:05:07,430 --> 01:05:08,400 You guys should look in here. 1043 01:05:08,400 --> 01:05:09,220 This is amazing. 1044 01:05:09,220 --> 01:05:10,350 I'm telling you, it's amazing. 1045 01:05:20,350 --> 01:05:22,340 [COUNTRY MUSIC PLAYING] 1046 01:05:45,400 --> 01:05:52,270 All right, here we have two zombie hands, which we 1047 01:05:52,270 --> 01:05:54,180 will call numbers one and two. 1048 01:05:56,940 --> 01:05:59,650 And we have two types of deodorant, which we will 1049 01:05:59,650 --> 01:06:04,320 designate types A and B. Now what I'm 1050 01:06:04,320 --> 01:06:11,760 going to do is spray zombie hand one with deodorant A. 1051 01:06:11,760 --> 01:06:17,470 As you can see, the skin becomes wet and sticky. 1052 01:06:17,470 --> 01:06:24,780 Now I'm going to spray zombie hand two with deodorant B. 1053 01:06:24,780 --> 01:06:26,230 Ah, my, my, my. 1054 01:06:26,230 --> 01:06:27,810 Look at that, huh? 1055 01:06:27,810 --> 01:06:35,640 You might notice that the tissue becomes dehydrated and decayed, 1056 01:06:35,640 --> 01:06:37,630 and, uh, and yucky. 1057 01:06:42,010 --> 01:06:45,320 Therefore, it's safe to conclude that the only effective 1058 01:06:45,320 --> 01:06:49,700 deodorant against zombies is one which contains 1059 01:06:49,700 --> 01:06:52,500 aluminum chlorohydrate. 1060 01:06:52,500 --> 01:06:58,460 It's dries them fast and keeps them dry. 1061 01:06:58,460 --> 01:07:01,400 Why only aluminum chlorohydrate? 1062 01:07:01,400 --> 01:07:04,050 How the hell am I suppose the know? 1063 01:07:04,050 --> 01:07:07,580 I'm pre vet, not a chemist. 1064 01:07:07,580 --> 01:07:08,390 This is essential. 1065 01:07:08,390 --> 01:07:10,280 We've got Andy's pack. 1066 01:07:10,280 --> 01:07:11,630 Arm yourselves. 1067 01:07:11,630 --> 01:07:14,120 [GROWLING] 1068 01:07:14,120 --> 01:07:15,610 What the hell was that? 1069 01:07:15,610 --> 01:07:18,100 I don't know, but it's coming this way. 1070 01:07:18,100 --> 01:07:20,050 [GROWLING] 1071 01:07:36,080 --> 01:07:39,060 Ma? 1072 01:07:39,060 --> 01:07:42,010 You're going to kill me, but [COUGHING]. 1073 01:07:51,260 --> 01:07:54,200 Ma, what happened to Porky? 1074 01:08:06,440 --> 01:08:07,140 Shit. 1075 01:08:07,140 --> 01:08:09,150 I'm not going to change this tire. 1076 01:08:09,150 --> 01:08:10,190 Fuck you. 1077 01:08:10,190 --> 01:08:12,300 Man, I just changed these motherfuckers. 1078 01:08:12,300 --> 01:08:14,020 We ran over some bullshit. 1079 01:08:14,020 --> 01:08:14,940 What? 1080 01:08:14,940 --> 01:08:16,640 Fuck you. 1081 01:08:16,640 --> 01:08:17,910 Give me a hand, Sherman. 1082 01:08:17,910 --> 01:08:19,200 Here, hold this, asshole. 1083 01:08:26,980 --> 01:08:31,310 Looks like a ball jar and a safety razor. 1084 01:08:31,310 --> 01:08:33,760 Whoa, Ty, check it out. 1085 01:08:33,760 --> 01:08:34,750 It's a native. 1086 01:08:34,750 --> 01:08:36,160 Oh, hello! 1087 01:08:36,160 --> 01:08:37,270 TYRONE: Hey, you. 1088 01:08:37,270 --> 01:08:38,260 Get over here! 1089 01:08:42,950 --> 01:08:44,220 Oh, man. 1090 01:08:44,220 --> 01:08:47,430 That boy don't look right, Ty. 1091 01:08:47,430 --> 01:08:49,920 Halt. Stop. 1092 01:08:49,920 --> 01:08:51,510 Freeze! 1093 01:08:51,510 --> 01:08:52,450 Fini, motherfucker. 1094 01:08:56,390 --> 01:08:57,310 That's french. 1095 01:08:57,310 --> 01:09:01,170 [GROWLING] 1096 01:09:01,170 --> 01:09:02,230 Oh, he's sick. 1097 01:09:02,230 --> 01:09:03,610 Let's take him with us. 1098 01:09:03,610 --> 01:09:04,590 Fuck you. 1099 01:09:04,590 --> 01:09:05,890 Shoot him, Sherman. 1100 01:09:05,890 --> 01:09:08,140 Which one? 1101 01:09:08,140 --> 01:09:09,100 Him first. 1102 01:09:09,100 --> 01:09:11,530 Ah, I think I'll just kick his ass. 1103 01:09:11,530 --> 01:09:14,190 I haven't tasted redneck in a long time. 1104 01:09:14,190 --> 01:09:15,410 Suppose he got rabies? 1105 01:09:15,410 --> 01:09:18,910 Well, I ain't going to let the dick bite me. 1106 01:09:18,910 --> 01:09:20,850 Be nice, Sherman. 1107 01:09:20,850 --> 01:09:23,670 SHERMAN: Fuck you. 1108 01:09:23,670 --> 01:09:26,720 All right, asshole. Oh, Jesus! 1109 01:09:49,200 --> 01:09:50,320 Hess. 1110 01:09:50,320 --> 01:09:52,290 He probably said something nasty. 1111 01:09:52,290 --> 01:09:54,440 Boss? 1112 01:09:54,440 --> 01:09:56,020 [GROWLING] 1113 01:10:01,230 --> 01:10:04,700 Oh, Ty, this could be fun. 1114 01:10:04,700 --> 01:10:06,690 Did you see the movie "Deliverance"? 1115 01:10:10,160 --> 01:10:11,650 Oh, hello! 1116 01:10:11,650 --> 01:10:13,630 Hi. 1117 01:10:13,630 --> 01:10:15,620 Water sports, anyone? 1118 01:10:15,620 --> 01:10:17,100 Oh, my! 1119 01:10:17,100 --> 01:10:18,100 No! 1120 01:10:18,100 --> 01:10:20,580 Stop! 1121 01:10:20,580 --> 01:10:24,540 Oh, no, stop! 1122 01:10:24,540 --> 01:10:25,540 [RIPPING] 1123 01:10:26,530 --> 01:10:28,020 [GROWLING] 1124 01:10:44,940 --> 01:10:45,750 Fuck you, still! 1125 01:11:06,040 --> 01:11:07,730 Man, we have got to make a plan. 1126 01:11:07,730 --> 01:11:09,720 Yeah, how we're getting the fuck out of here. 1127 01:11:09,720 --> 01:11:10,420 Look! 1128 01:11:13,630 --> 01:11:15,870 TYRONE: Hey, you kids, run! 1129 01:11:15,870 --> 01:11:16,810 Who the hell is that? 1130 01:11:16,810 --> 01:11:18,210 Get out of here! 1131 01:11:23,750 --> 01:11:25,960 Oh, shoot! 1132 01:11:25,960 --> 01:11:27,280 Where'd he go? 1133 01:11:27,280 --> 01:11:29,830 I don't know, but I think... I think we're on our own. 1134 01:11:29,830 --> 01:11:32,020 No. 1135 01:11:32,020 --> 01:11:33,630 Hey, look, there's no hard feelings, 1136 01:11:33,630 --> 01:11:35,080 but we got to get out of here. 1137 01:11:35,080 --> 01:11:39,420 [GROWLING] 1138 01:11:39,420 --> 01:11:41,210 Oops, too late for you. 1139 01:11:41,210 --> 01:11:42,200 [GUNSHOT] 1140 01:11:42,200 --> 01:11:43,190 Oh, ahh! 1141 01:12:20,890 --> 01:12:22,380 [GROWLING] 1142 01:12:28,330 --> 01:12:29,320 Right here. 1143 01:12:29,320 --> 01:12:32,790 Look over... right there. 1144 01:12:32,790 --> 01:12:34,280 [GROWLING] 1145 01:12:48,670 --> 01:12:51,080 I'm gonna kick your fucking ass. 1146 01:12:51,080 --> 01:12:51,780 Are you crazy? 1147 01:12:51,780 --> 01:12:53,090 You can go kick them by yourself. 1148 01:13:10,950 --> 01:13:12,430 This is it! 1149 01:13:23,350 --> 01:13:24,850 [SCREAMING] 1150 01:13:33,050 --> 01:13:36,440 Come on, I'll kick your fucking ass, motherfucker. 1151 01:13:36,440 --> 01:14:16,690 [WHIMPERING] 1152 01:14:16,690 --> 01:14:32,990 [WHIMPERING] 1153 01:14:32,990 --> 01:14:35,870 Die, you bastards! Ahh! 1154 01:15:13,460 --> 01:15:15,450 [WILBUR SCREAMING] 1155 01:15:42,280 --> 01:16:02,770 [SCREAMING] 1156 01:16:02,770 --> 01:16:14,820 [CRYING] 1157 01:16:14,820 --> 01:16:24,240 - [WHIMPERING] - No! 1158 01:16:45,920 --> 01:16:57,880 [SCREAMING] 1159 01:16:57,880 --> 01:16:58,870 [RIPPING] 1160 01:17:12,540 --> 01:17:13,240 Ahh! 1161 01:17:51,090 --> 01:18:19,480 [SCREAMING] 1162 01:18:19,480 --> 01:18:21,470 [GROWLING] 1163 01:18:46,060 --> 01:18:47,180 [MOTOR RUNNING] 1164 01:18:54,960 --> 01:18:55,660 Help! 1165 01:19:01,150 --> 01:19:02,650 [LISA SCREAMING] 1166 01:20:09,020 --> 01:20:10,510 [GROWLING] 1167 01:20:44,440 --> 01:22:10,490 [SCREAMING] 1168 01:22:10,490 --> 01:22:11,990 [FOOTSTEPS] 1169 01:24:16,740 --> 01:25:30,590 [CRYING] 1170 01:25:30,590 --> 01:25:33,570 - [GROWLING] - Ahh! 1171 01:25:39,520 --> 01:25:41,010 No! No! 1172 01:26:41,030 --> 01:26:42,740 Come on, Missy. 1173 01:26:42,740 --> 01:26:45,700 Dark times is here. 1174 01:26:45,700 --> 01:26:48,620 We best be going, yes we do. 1175 01:26:48,620 --> 01:26:51,050 We best leave now. 1176 01:26:51,050 --> 01:26:53,160 Don't you worry none. 1177 01:26:53,160 --> 01:26:55,820 The tobacco man won't hurt you. 1178 01:26:55,820 --> 01:26:57,810 [VOICES ECHOING] 1179 01:27:21,720 --> 01:27:24,960 [BABY CRYING] 78766

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