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1
00:00:12,312 --> 00:00:13,478
Pete: I'm pete donville.
2
00:00:13,513 --> 00:00:15,553
This is my life. Get used to it.
3
00:00:23,156 --> 00:00:24,556
Her name is susan.
4
00:00:24,592 --> 00:00:26,269
She's beautiful
And sophisticated,
5
00:00:26,293 --> 00:00:28,961
And most of all, she's into me.
6
00:00:28,996 --> 00:00:31,007
But my boss captain
Shaw is into her, too,
7
00:00:31,031 --> 00:00:32,197
Which wouldn't be so bad
8
00:00:32,232 --> 00:00:33,977
If it weren't for
This little thing...
9
00:00:34,001 --> 00:00:37,502
Susan is my roommate's mom.
10
00:00:37,537 --> 00:00:40,205
When berg found out, he flew
Into a rage and stormed off,
11
00:00:40,240 --> 00:00:42,874
But he'll be back,
And soon I'll be dead.
12
00:00:42,910 --> 00:00:45,110
Or just scolded, you know,
13
00:00:45,145 --> 00:00:49,715
But who wants that
On their day off?
14
00:00:52,886 --> 00:00:55,386
I think I'll take a shower.
15
00:00:58,492 --> 00:01:00,525
Oh, hey, captain,
16
00:01:00,560 --> 00:01:03,028
I was just coming to do that.
17
00:01:03,063 --> 00:01:04,641
That's all right, donville.
18
00:01:04,665 --> 00:01:07,565
Grunt work helps me
Keep my mind off of...
19
00:01:07,601 --> 00:01:09,735
A certain someone.
20
00:01:09,770 --> 00:01:11,436
Susan.
21
00:01:13,107 --> 00:01:15,941
Mrs. Bergen. Mrs. Susan bergen.
22
00:01:15,976 --> 00:01:18,443
I know it was just one date,
23
00:01:18,478 --> 00:01:21,513
But we grew so close.
24
00:01:21,548 --> 00:01:26,317
I even showed her
My appendix scar.
25
00:01:26,353 --> 00:01:28,486
Wow, wow.
26
00:01:28,522 --> 00:01:31,990
I hadn't realized it
Had gone that far.
27
00:01:32,026 --> 00:01:34,626
But, listen, sir,
I'm here for you.
28
00:01:34,662 --> 00:01:36,461
Thanks, donville.
29
00:01:36,496 --> 00:01:41,566
I'm not one for nancy
Talk, but it helps.
30
00:01:41,601 --> 00:01:43,847
I mean, you wake up
In the morning and...
31
00:01:43,871 --> 00:01:46,138
She's the first
Thing on your mind.
32
00:01:46,173 --> 00:01:47,906
You try to eat breakfast...
33
00:01:47,941 --> 00:01:50,408
But you can't eat anything.
34
00:01:50,443 --> 00:01:53,845
All you can remember
Is the way she smelled...
35
00:01:53,881 --> 00:01:57,783
And what it was
Like to kiss her.
36
00:01:57,818 --> 00:02:01,619
I never kissed her.
37
00:02:01,655 --> 00:02:04,189
No, no, but... But
She saw your scar,
38
00:02:04,224 --> 00:02:09,027
And that's... That's,
I think, second base.
39
00:02:09,063 --> 00:02:11,296
Listen, why don't...
Why don't I go out
40
00:02:11,331 --> 00:02:13,565
And get us some
Comfort food, all right?
41
00:02:13,600 --> 00:02:15,300
How about meatball subs?
42
00:02:15,335 --> 00:02:19,370
I'd rather have pudding.
43
00:02:19,406 --> 00:02:22,808
All right. You got it.
44
00:02:22,843 --> 00:02:25,110
What a good kid.
45
00:02:25,145 --> 00:02:27,012
Hi. Excuse me.
46
00:02:27,047 --> 00:02:28,958
I was looking for pete donville.
47
00:02:28,982 --> 00:02:31,049
Oh, you just... You
Just missed him.
48
00:02:31,085 --> 00:02:32,050
Oh.
49
00:02:32,086 --> 00:02:33,384
Are you his girlfriend?
50
00:02:33,420 --> 00:02:34,786
Oh, no.
51
00:02:34,822 --> 00:02:37,262
Well, if I was 20
Years older, maybe.
52
00:02:39,659 --> 00:02:40,904
I'm captain shaw.
53
00:02:40,928 --> 00:02:43,161
Hi. Can I help you?
54
00:02:43,197 --> 00:02:45,296
Yes, I just wanted to give him
55
00:02:45,332 --> 00:02:47,599
These things from
Home... Just some clothes,
56
00:02:47,634 --> 00:02:49,801
A toothbrush, his
Aquaman flip-flops...
57
00:02:49,837 --> 00:02:51,236
Is he moving in?
58
00:02:51,271 --> 00:02:52,470
Oh, no, no, no.
59
00:02:52,505 --> 00:02:54,450
He just got in a bit of a
Fight with his roommate.
60
00:02:54,474 --> 00:02:56,452
Borrowed something
Without asking?
61
00:02:58,578 --> 00:03:01,113
Oh, no, no, no, no. Pete's
Very conscientious.
62
00:03:01,148 --> 00:03:03,115
It's just this little thing
63
00:03:03,150 --> 00:03:06,251
Where he slept with
His roommate's mom.
64
00:03:06,286 --> 00:03:10,155
He slept with mrs. Bergen?
65
00:03:10,190 --> 00:03:11,356
Oh, yeah.
66
00:03:11,391 --> 00:03:13,759
She had to leave
Town. It's a whole to-do.
67
00:03:13,794 --> 00:03:15,627
So you'll give this to him?
68
00:03:15,662 --> 00:03:17,562
Oh, I'll give it to him.
69
00:03:19,532 --> 00:03:24,069
Wow. It is so nice that pete
Finally has a nice captain.
70
00:03:24,104 --> 00:03:26,004
You know, the last one sounded
71
00:03:26,039 --> 00:03:28,439
Like he really had
A stick up his butt.
72
00:03:42,856 --> 00:03:45,001
See, don't you feel better now?
73
00:03:45,025 --> 00:03:46,124
No.
74
00:03:46,159 --> 00:03:49,072
Oh, funny. Maybe it
Only works on cats.
75
00:03:49,096 --> 00:03:50,962
My best friend
Slept with my mom.
76
00:03:50,998 --> 00:03:53,076
I'm not going to get over
It by scratching on a post
77
00:03:53,100 --> 00:03:54,900
Or chasing a
Feather on a string.
78
00:03:54,935 --> 00:03:56,846
I was afraid you would say that,
79
00:03:56,870 --> 00:03:58,403
So I baked you
80
00:03:58,438 --> 00:04:01,205
A "Sorry pete slept
With your mom" muffin.
81
00:04:01,241 --> 00:04:04,776
No, thank you.
82
00:04:04,812 --> 00:04:06,989
Come on, berg. Now,
Okay, don't get mad,
83
00:04:07,013 --> 00:04:09,225
But I think they
Made a nice couple.
84
00:04:09,249 --> 00:04:12,083
How... How could you think that?
85
00:04:12,118 --> 00:04:13,452
How could you say it?
86
00:04:13,487 --> 00:04:15,031
How could you
Think it, then say it?
87
00:04:15,055 --> 00:04:18,623
Okay, yes, they
Make a crazy couple,
88
00:04:18,659 --> 00:04:20,925
But you know who else
Makes a crazy couple?
89
00:04:20,961 --> 00:04:21,971
- knock, knock.
- who's there?
90
00:04:21,995 --> 00:04:22,961
It's us!
91
00:04:22,996 --> 00:04:24,329
Hey, all right, look,
92
00:04:24,365 --> 00:04:27,632
Irene, she's my mom, okay?
93
00:04:27,668 --> 00:04:30,301
You know, the woman who
Held me when I was little?
94
00:04:30,337 --> 00:04:32,604
Who wiped my nose
When I was sick?
95
00:04:32,639 --> 00:04:34,373
Never missed a soccer game?
96
00:04:34,408 --> 00:04:35,674
Then there's pete,
97
00:04:35,709 --> 00:04:38,243
Who I watched porn
With last friday.
98
00:04:38,278 --> 00:04:40,979
Now picture the two
Of them together.
99
00:04:41,014 --> 00:04:42,914
Ew! Oh!
100
00:04:42,949 --> 00:04:44,349
You poor baby.
101
00:04:44,385 --> 00:04:46,017
Yeah, not now, irene.
102
00:04:46,052 --> 00:04:49,388
I find all women repulsive.
103
00:04:49,423 --> 00:04:50,955
Sharon: hey, ash.
104
00:04:50,991 --> 00:04:51,956
Hey.
105
00:04:51,992 --> 00:04:54,359
Notice anything
Different about me?
106
00:04:54,395 --> 00:04:56,305
Sharon, I don't find these games
107
00:04:56,329 --> 00:04:58,530
Quite as challenging
As johnny does.
108
00:04:58,565 --> 00:05:01,165
So what's up?
109
00:05:01,201 --> 00:05:02,667
Okay, I just wanted to thank you
110
00:05:02,703 --> 00:05:04,503
For helping me
Out with my resumés
111
00:05:04,538 --> 00:05:06,337
Because I was just offered a job
112
00:05:06,373 --> 00:05:08,507
As sales rep for
Bennett pharmaceuticals!
113
00:05:09,543 --> 00:05:10,653
Congratulations!
114
00:05:10,677 --> 00:05:12,343
Yeah, I get total benefits,
115
00:05:12,379 --> 00:05:17,048
A 401k, and free hormone
Replacement when I retire.
116
00:05:17,083 --> 00:05:18,983
I knew you could do it.
117
00:05:19,019 --> 00:05:20,652
Yeah!
118
00:05:20,687 --> 00:05:22,721
I don't want to do it.
119
00:05:22,756 --> 00:05:24,656
If I wanted to sell drugs,
120
00:05:24,691 --> 00:05:29,227
I would have stayed
With my first boyfriend.
121
00:05:29,262 --> 00:05:30,796
Don't take the job.
122
00:05:30,831 --> 00:05:32,174
No, I have to do something.
123
00:05:32,198 --> 00:05:33,810
Johnny's pressuring
Me to go to work.
124
00:05:33,834 --> 00:05:36,000
I just... I don't
Know. I feel so lost.
125
00:05:36,036 --> 00:05:37,669
Oh, shar, come on.
126
00:05:37,704 --> 00:05:40,505
You just haven't figured
Out what you want to do yet.
127
00:05:40,541 --> 00:05:42,373
Come on... Think back.
128
00:05:42,409 --> 00:05:44,788
Isn't there something
You've always dreamed about?
129
00:05:44,812 --> 00:05:50,181
Well, I've always wanted
To be a v.J. For mtv.
130
00:05:52,252 --> 00:05:53,952
Okay.
131
00:05:53,987 --> 00:05:57,856
Any other dreams?
And this time, wake up.
132
00:05:57,891 --> 00:05:59,357
Okay, there is one,
133
00:05:59,392 --> 00:06:01,660
But please promise
Not to judge me.
134
00:06:01,695 --> 00:06:03,606
Aw, so it's something stupid.
135
00:06:03,630 --> 00:06:04,863
No. Okay.
136
00:06:04,898 --> 00:06:07,899
I'm thinking about
Going to law school.
137
00:06:11,104 --> 00:06:14,840
So do you know anything
About music videos?
138
00:06:14,875 --> 00:06:16,608
Yeah, but you know what?
139
00:06:16,643 --> 00:06:18,788
Law school, it takes
So much time and money,
140
00:06:18,812 --> 00:06:21,145
It's just... It's just
A stupid dream.
141
00:06:21,181 --> 00:06:22,647
No. Come on, sharon,
142
00:06:22,683 --> 00:06:25,216
There are no stupid dreams.
143
00:06:25,251 --> 00:06:27,886
Listen, you've got the time,
144
00:06:27,921 --> 00:06:29,588
And now you've got the money,
145
00:06:29,623 --> 00:06:32,390
And I say if being a lawyer
Is what you really want,
146
00:06:32,425 --> 00:06:33,803
Then you should go for it.
147
00:06:33,827 --> 00:06:35,827
Really? Yeah.
148
00:06:35,863 --> 00:06:37,974
Who argues more than
Anyone else in this building?
149
00:06:37,998 --> 00:06:40,765
You do.
150
00:06:40,801 --> 00:06:42,934
You see? You're going
To make a great lawyer.
151
00:06:42,970 --> 00:06:45,069
I'm hating you already.
152
00:06:45,105 --> 00:06:47,506
Well, who cares? I'm
Going to be a lawyer.
153
00:06:47,541 --> 00:06:49,908
I can get better
Friends. See ya.
154
00:06:53,747 --> 00:06:56,948
Okay, everybody,
Hide your mothers.
155
00:06:59,720 --> 00:07:03,321
Hey, sharon, thanks
For the care package.
156
00:07:03,356 --> 00:07:05,356
Did you know captain
Shaw was in love with susan?
157
00:07:05,392 --> 00:07:06,725
No.
158
00:07:06,760 --> 00:07:08,838
Oh, well, you know what?
I wouldn't worry, pete.
159
00:07:08,862 --> 00:07:11,329
I don't think he's going to be
Too much competition for you.
160
00:07:12,933 --> 00:07:15,053
So, how's your old lady?
161
00:07:16,537 --> 00:07:18,657
I'm sorry. I meant berg's mom.
162
00:07:19,973 --> 00:07:23,074
There's really no good
Way of saying it, is there?
163
00:07:23,109 --> 00:07:24,242
No.
164
00:07:24,277 --> 00:07:26,545
But, ashley, what are you
Doing out here, anyway?
165
00:07:26,580 --> 00:07:29,180
Shouldn't you be
Rounding up the dalmatians?
166
00:07:35,789 --> 00:07:37,767
Okay, okay, okay,
Well, seriously,
167
00:07:37,791 --> 00:07:39,602
So have you talked with susan?
168
00:07:39,626 --> 00:07:41,170
I haven't talked to her since I
Dropped her off at the train.
169
00:07:41,194 --> 00:07:42,405
I'm going to give her a call
170
00:07:42,429 --> 00:07:43,740
As soon as I figure out
What I'm going to say.
171
00:07:43,764 --> 00:07:45,074
Oh, thank you. That reminds me.
172
00:07:45,098 --> 00:07:47,138
I've got to call my mother.
173
00:07:48,001 --> 00:07:51,903
Oh, peter donville.
174
00:07:51,939 --> 00:07:54,350
You are not the man
I thought you were.
175
00:07:54,374 --> 00:07:56,007
Well, that can happen, irene.
176
00:07:56,043 --> 00:07:57,887
Remember when you
Thought the garbage man
177
00:07:57,911 --> 00:07:59,878
Was burt bacharach?
178
00:07:59,913 --> 00:08:01,824
How could you do this to berg?
179
00:08:01,848 --> 00:08:04,282
If anyone, I thought
You would understand.
180
00:08:04,317 --> 00:08:07,452
Well, you thought wrong, batman.
181
00:08:07,487 --> 00:08:10,166
The boy wonder's got
His cape all in a bunch.
182
00:08:10,190 --> 00:08:12,057
Irene, can we talk
About this later?
183
00:08:12,092 --> 00:08:15,126
Commissioner gordon
Just sent up the bat signal.
184
00:08:15,161 --> 00:08:18,229
Sure, fine, leave me here
To clean up your mess.
185
00:08:18,264 --> 00:08:20,164
Do you think I wanted this?
186
00:08:20,200 --> 00:08:22,667
Huh? You know, y-you
Wake up one morning
187
00:08:22,703 --> 00:08:25,236
And... And you think you're
Never going to find someone.
188
00:08:25,271 --> 00:08:27,505
And then you turn
Around and there's susan,
189
00:08:27,540 --> 00:08:28,940
And there's this spark,
190
00:08:28,976 --> 00:08:31,542
And all this wonderful
Stuff starts to happen, and...
191
00:08:31,578 --> 00:08:33,511
Wait. Do you love her?
192
00:08:33,546 --> 00:08:35,546
I don't know.
Maybe. I don't know.
193
00:08:35,582 --> 00:08:37,248
Oh, pete donville,
194
00:08:37,283 --> 00:08:40,551
You're not just some guy
Hopping his roommate's mom.
195
00:08:40,587 --> 00:08:42,754
You really care about her.
196
00:08:42,789 --> 00:08:44,022
Yeah, I do, irene,
197
00:08:44,057 --> 00:08:46,057
But it's over now,
And I'm never going
198
00:08:46,093 --> 00:08:48,093
To find out what
Might have been.
199
00:08:48,128 --> 00:08:52,831
No! I, for one, cannot spend
The rest of my life wondering.
200
00:08:52,866 --> 00:08:55,734
What about berg?
201
00:08:55,769 --> 00:08:58,249
He's got a muffin the
Size of a basketball.
202
00:09:01,174 --> 00:09:02,206
Hi.
203
00:09:02,242 --> 00:09:03,207
Hey, baby.
204
00:09:03,243 --> 00:09:04,676
Hey, uh, sweetie,
205
00:09:04,711 --> 00:09:06,122
I've been thinking
About our savings.
206
00:09:06,146 --> 00:09:09,614
Oh, I wish you'd
Stop doing that.
207
00:09:09,650 --> 00:09:11,961
And I have figured out a way
208
00:09:11,985 --> 00:09:15,887
To turn our
$90,000 into millions.
209
00:09:15,922 --> 00:09:16,922
I'm listening.
210
00:09:16,957 --> 00:09:18,189
Okay.
211
00:09:18,224 --> 00:09:20,725
I'm going to law school.
212
00:09:20,761 --> 00:09:22,160
What's your plan...
213
00:09:22,195 --> 00:09:25,063
You're going to slip down
The steps and sue them?
214
00:09:25,098 --> 00:09:28,566
No, sweetie, I'm serious.
I want my law degree.
215
00:09:28,601 --> 00:09:31,435
What happened to the v.J. Thing?
216
00:09:31,471 --> 00:09:33,683
Sweetie, I've wanted to
Be a lawyer for a long time,
217
00:09:33,707 --> 00:09:35,518
But I just didn't realize it
218
00:09:35,542 --> 00:09:38,276
Until I was talking
With ashley today.
219
00:09:38,311 --> 00:09:40,344
Oh, well, thanks a lot, ashley.
220
00:09:40,380 --> 00:09:44,015
Hey, when she came to
Me, she was a drug dealer.
221
00:09:44,051 --> 00:09:45,862
Yeah, what about that job offer?
222
00:09:45,886 --> 00:09:47,585
I don't want to do that.
223
00:09:47,620 --> 00:09:50,055
I would be a good lawyer.
You know what I'm like.
224
00:09:50,090 --> 00:09:51,200
I-I'm relentless, I'm a fighter,
225
00:09:51,224 --> 00:09:53,024
I win every argument...
226
00:09:53,060 --> 00:09:56,394
Yes. I've seen that.
It's not attractive.
227
00:09:56,429 --> 00:09:58,897
Johnny, right now I have
The time and the money.
228
00:09:58,932 --> 00:10:00,576
Whoa! Who-o-oa,
Whoa, hold on there.
229
00:10:00,600 --> 00:10:03,768
You mean we have the money.
230
00:10:03,804 --> 00:10:05,447
All right, we have the money,
231
00:10:05,471 --> 00:10:07,105
And it's not doing anything
232
00:10:07,140 --> 00:10:08,951
Just sitting there
Collecting interest.
233
00:10:08,975 --> 00:10:11,187
But we have a rule, remember?
234
00:10:11,211 --> 00:10:13,756
We have to agree before
Every major purchase.
235
00:10:13,780 --> 00:10:16,414
Oh, right, like the house
You bought without her.
236
00:10:16,449 --> 00:10:18,850
That's why she made the rule!
237
00:10:18,885 --> 00:10:21,219
Okay.
238
00:10:21,254 --> 00:10:23,521
If you're going to
Yell at me, I'm leaving.
239
00:10:23,556 --> 00:10:26,324
Oh, you mean I had that
Power all along? Go!
240
00:10:32,065 --> 00:10:35,166
Johnny, I can't believe you're
Being like this over money.
241
00:10:35,202 --> 00:10:37,035
Sweetie, three
Years of law school
242
00:10:37,070 --> 00:10:38,937
Will take up our entire savings.
243
00:10:38,972 --> 00:10:40,917
But I promise you
I will make it back.
244
00:10:40,941 --> 00:10:42,373
This is for my career.
245
00:10:42,408 --> 00:10:43,641
Your career?
246
00:10:43,676 --> 00:10:46,444
Sweetie, you just thought
Of this this morning.
247
00:10:46,479 --> 00:10:48,646
You've probably been
Looking for a reason
248
00:10:48,681 --> 00:10:51,783
To buy a new outfit
And a briefcase.
249
00:10:51,818 --> 00:10:56,387
Look, I have wanted that
Briefcase for a long time.
250
00:10:56,422 --> 00:10:58,723
Johnny, half that money is mine,
251
00:10:58,759 --> 00:11:01,259
And I would like to use
It to go to law school.
252
00:11:01,294 --> 00:11:04,495
Then fine. Use it.
253
00:11:04,530 --> 00:11:06,998
Okay, say it again but mean it.
254
00:11:07,033 --> 00:11:09,178
Sweetie, it is important to me
255
00:11:09,202 --> 00:11:11,013
That you're okay
With this decision.
256
00:11:11,037 --> 00:11:12,270
I-I can't just be happy
257
00:11:12,305 --> 00:11:14,105
Because you asked
Me to be happy.
258
00:11:14,141 --> 00:11:16,440
I mean, what if this
Is just another way
259
00:11:16,476 --> 00:11:18,276
For you to avoid responsibility,
260
00:11:18,311 --> 00:11:20,611
Another excuse so that
You don't have to work
261
00:11:20,647 --> 00:11:22,046
For a few more years?
262
00:11:22,082 --> 00:11:24,026
Johnny, how can you say that?
263
00:11:24,050 --> 00:11:28,619
Because she hasn't worked
A day since I married her!
264
00:11:47,640 --> 00:11:53,111
Uh... I just ran into pete.
265
00:11:53,146 --> 00:11:54,612
You did?
266
00:11:54,647 --> 00:11:56,614
I had a talk with him.
267
00:11:56,649 --> 00:11:58,727
He's in your apartment
Packing right now.
268
00:11:58,751 --> 00:12:02,720
Great! He's moving out?
269
00:12:02,755 --> 00:12:05,123
I told him to go for it!
270
00:12:11,397 --> 00:12:13,898
You sent pete back
To be with my mother?
271
00:12:13,934 --> 00:12:17,969
Poor dear. All he needed
Was a little support.
272
00:12:18,004 --> 00:12:22,673
Did you make him a muffin?
273
00:12:22,709 --> 00:12:25,243
Berg, if you had seen
How his face lit up,
274
00:12:25,278 --> 00:12:27,545
You would have
Done the same thing.
275
00:12:27,580 --> 00:12:30,915
Well, I wasn't there, but, uh...
276
00:12:30,951 --> 00:12:33,062
Just going by how I feel,
277
00:12:33,086 --> 00:12:34,730
I'm pretty sure I wouldn't have.
278
00:12:34,754 --> 00:12:37,455
And you shouldn't have, either.
279
00:12:37,490 --> 00:12:38,823
Why?
280
00:12:38,859 --> 00:12:40,369
I can't believe that
I have to stand here
281
00:12:40,393 --> 00:12:42,126
And explain this to you.
282
00:12:42,162 --> 00:12:43,806
Look, irene, I am your
Boyfriend, correct?
283
00:12:43,830 --> 00:12:45,696
Correct. By the way, I love it.
284
00:12:45,732 --> 00:12:47,765
Thank you.
285
00:12:47,800 --> 00:12:49,045
And you are my girlfriend.
286
00:12:49,069 --> 00:12:51,202
With bells on.
287
00:12:51,238 --> 00:12:55,206
And as boyfriend and
Girlfriend, we are a team.
288
00:12:55,242 --> 00:12:56,853
You're on the same side.
289
00:12:56,877 --> 00:12:59,377
Because you're mad at
Pete, I should be mad at pete.
290
00:12:59,412 --> 00:13:01,712
Okay, team hug! Okay!
291
00:13:01,748 --> 00:13:05,583
All right, hey...
Let's hit the showers.
292
00:13:05,618 --> 00:13:07,151
Okay.
293
00:13:07,187 --> 00:13:11,122
Hey, but I'm still glad I told
Pete to see your mother.
294
00:13:11,157 --> 00:13:12,957
Oh.
295
00:13:12,993 --> 00:13:14,525
I see.
296
00:13:14,560 --> 00:13:16,494
Where are you going?
297
00:13:16,529 --> 00:13:18,489
I'm going to go play
For the other team.
298
00:13:20,400 --> 00:13:21,680
You know what I mean.
299
00:13:26,339 --> 00:13:28,706
Hello, pete.
300
00:13:28,741 --> 00:13:30,108
Hey, berg.
301
00:13:30,143 --> 00:13:32,343
Long time, no see.
302
00:13:32,379 --> 00:13:35,413
Have you lost weight?
You look fantastic.
303
00:13:35,448 --> 00:13:39,817
I guess you find all
The bergens attractive.
304
00:13:42,322 --> 00:13:44,522
You, uh, you going somewhere?
305
00:13:44,557 --> 00:13:48,426
All right, look, I'm
Not going to lie to you.
306
00:13:48,461 --> 00:13:52,330
I've been transferred to italy.
307
00:13:52,365 --> 00:13:54,332
I see.
308
00:13:54,367 --> 00:13:55,766
Well, let me...
309
00:13:55,802 --> 00:13:59,404
Let me accustom you to
Some of the hand gestures.
310
00:13:59,439 --> 00:14:01,205
I know where you're
Going, all right?
311
00:14:01,241 --> 00:14:03,286
I want you to stop
Seeing my mother. It's over.
312
00:14:03,310 --> 00:14:04,753
Look, berg, I feel
Terrible about this.
313
00:14:04,777 --> 00:14:07,489
I really do. But I can't just
Leave things unresolved
314
00:14:07,513 --> 00:14:09,058
And susan feels the same way.
315
00:14:09,082 --> 00:14:10,681
You talked to her?
316
00:14:10,716 --> 00:14:12,528
Yeah, just now. It's
Rude to just drop by.
317
00:14:12,552 --> 00:14:14,563
If there's one thing
My mom taught me...
318
00:14:14,587 --> 00:14:17,721
Okay.
319
00:14:17,757 --> 00:14:19,890
Nev-nev-never mind.
320
00:14:19,926 --> 00:14:21,859
The point is, is there's...
321
00:14:21,894 --> 00:14:25,997
There's just a lot of things
That we need to sort out.
322
00:14:26,032 --> 00:14:27,999
You need to sort things out.
323
00:14:28,034 --> 00:14:29,567
I understand.
324
00:14:29,602 --> 00:14:32,903
There's nothing I can do
Except help you with your bag.
325
00:14:32,939 --> 00:14:35,173
Anything else you'd
Like to take to albany?
326
00:14:35,208 --> 00:14:36,574
My grandmother?
327
00:14:39,745 --> 00:14:41,958
Look, this doesn't
Have to be a bad thing.
328
00:14:41,982 --> 00:14:44,093
What if it works out
With me and susan?
329
00:14:44,117 --> 00:14:45,183
Oh, excellent.
330
00:14:45,218 --> 00:14:47,986
Well, then you can
Be my new stepdad.
331
00:14:48,021 --> 00:14:51,089
Yeah, I'll call you papa and
You can call me half-pint.
332
00:14:51,124 --> 00:14:52,368
We all go and get
Banana splits together,
333
00:14:52,392 --> 00:14:55,426
Like one big, happy family.
Have you lost your mind?
334
00:14:55,462 --> 00:14:58,296
Berg, I understand
Why you're angry.
335
00:14:58,331 --> 00:15:00,498
I-I do.
336
00:15:00,533 --> 00:15:04,702
But look, can't you just
Understand how I feel?
337
00:15:04,737 --> 00:15:06,415
If you leave, don't come back.
338
00:15:06,439 --> 00:15:08,606
What are you saying?
339
00:15:14,047 --> 00:15:17,348
If you leave, don't come back!
340
00:15:21,988 --> 00:15:26,290
Oh, good. I believe
These are your pull-ups.
341
00:15:26,326 --> 00:15:29,193
Congratulations, sharon.
342
00:15:29,229 --> 00:15:31,862
Your project to reanimate
Hitler has worked.
343
00:15:33,566 --> 00:15:35,644
Berg threw my
Clothes out the window.
344
00:15:35,668 --> 00:15:38,236
Oh, is he still
Mad at you about...
345
00:15:38,271 --> 00:15:40,405
You know?
346
00:15:40,440 --> 00:15:42,706
You can say it, sharon.
347
00:15:42,742 --> 00:15:45,121
Me and susan... I haven't done
Anything to be ashamed of.
348
00:15:45,145 --> 00:15:48,879
That's right. You should get
The friend of the year award.
349
00:15:48,915 --> 00:15:51,582
Why is everyone so
Concerned with berg, huh?
350
00:15:51,617 --> 00:15:53,129
Why isn't anyone
Concerned about me?
351
00:15:53,153 --> 00:15:55,164
I'm dealing with a lot of
Difficult emotions now.
352
00:15:55,188 --> 00:15:57,433
Now, will someone
Please find me a stick
353
00:15:57,457 --> 00:15:59,657
And help me pick my
Underwear out of a tree?
354
00:15:59,692 --> 00:16:01,492
I'm late for a train.
355
00:16:01,528 --> 00:16:02,927
Where are you going?
356
00:16:02,962 --> 00:16:04,529
Albany.
357
00:16:04,564 --> 00:16:06,164
What?
358
00:16:06,199 --> 00:16:08,477
Susan and I are going
To see where we stand.
359
00:16:08,501 --> 00:16:11,936
Wow. I bet your brain
Is no bigger than a pea.
360
00:16:11,971 --> 00:16:14,372
What I think ashley means to say
361
00:16:14,407 --> 00:16:16,874
Is, sweetie, I think you
Just need to slow down
362
00:16:16,909 --> 00:16:18,887
And think about
What this will do
363
00:16:18,911 --> 00:16:20,589
To your relationship with berg.
364
00:16:20,613 --> 00:16:22,980
No, what I meant was
I bet if we had a pea
365
00:16:23,015 --> 00:16:25,649
And then pete's brain
And we compared...
366
00:16:25,685 --> 00:16:27,651
Thank you.
367
00:16:27,687 --> 00:16:29,365
Berg will get over
This. He always does.
368
00:16:29,389 --> 00:16:30,955
Not this time, pete.
369
00:16:30,990 --> 00:16:32,690
Sharon, he'll get over this.
370
00:16:32,725 --> 00:16:34,258
We've been through a lot.
371
00:16:34,294 --> 00:16:36,205
We've weathered
Stuff like this before.
372
00:16:36,229 --> 00:16:38,407
Remember when he went out
With marty without asking?
373
00:16:38,431 --> 00:16:40,098
I got over it.
374
00:16:40,133 --> 00:16:41,099
Really?
375
00:16:41,134 --> 00:16:43,801
No, but we're still friends.
376
00:16:43,836 --> 00:16:45,570
It's hardly the same.
377
00:16:45,605 --> 00:16:47,649
See, I knew you
Would side with him.
378
00:16:47,673 --> 00:16:49,807
No, come on. I am
Not siding with him.
379
00:16:49,842 --> 00:16:51,675
There's no one
Right or wrong here.
380
00:16:51,711 --> 00:16:54,412
Pete, he will never,
Ever understand this,
381
00:16:54,447 --> 00:16:57,181
So if this is what
You want to do,
382
00:16:57,217 --> 00:16:59,117
You have to take responsibility
383
00:16:59,152 --> 00:17:01,119
For your decision.
384
00:17:13,466 --> 00:17:15,266
Well...
385
00:17:15,301 --> 00:17:18,302
Looks like I'm all you've
Got left in the world.
386
00:17:18,338 --> 00:17:19,903
Well, go ahead.
387
00:17:19,939 --> 00:17:21,917
The lions and the jackals
Have had their fill of me.
388
00:17:21,941 --> 00:17:23,419
It's time for you to swoop down
389
00:17:23,443 --> 00:17:25,683
And stick your ugly
Neck into my carcass.
390
00:17:30,082 --> 00:17:31,960
What the hell was that for?
391
00:17:31,984 --> 00:17:35,219
Did you put a sign on my back?
392
00:17:35,255 --> 00:17:37,054
I know this is really hard,
393
00:17:37,089 --> 00:17:39,157
And I hope you make
The right choice.
394
00:17:39,192 --> 00:17:41,992
Thanks.
395
00:17:42,028 --> 00:17:43,628
What would you do?
396
00:17:43,663 --> 00:17:45,463
Oh, I'd wait to see what you do
397
00:17:45,498 --> 00:17:47,218
And then do the oposite.
398
00:17:49,001 --> 00:17:50,368
Okay.
399
00:17:50,403 --> 00:17:52,870
Law school is $25,000 a year
400
00:17:52,905 --> 00:17:57,875
Plus books, times
Three years... Damn!
401
00:18:00,846 --> 00:18:06,250
Okay, if law school
Were $800 a year...
402
00:18:06,286 --> 00:18:07,585
Hi.
403
00:18:07,620 --> 00:18:10,020
Hey, baby, would you
Say you're smart enough
404
00:18:10,056 --> 00:18:12,290
To get into a real
Topnotch law school?
405
00:18:12,325 --> 00:18:13,569
Yes, johnny, I am.
406
00:18:13,593 --> 00:18:16,160
Damn.
407
00:18:16,196 --> 00:18:18,440
What, so you're going
To be unhappy about this?
408
00:18:18,464 --> 00:18:21,532
Yeah, I-I don't see how
Things have changed.
409
00:18:21,568 --> 00:18:23,612
Well, they have.
This is my decision,
410
00:18:23,636 --> 00:18:25,514
And I'm going to take
Responsibility for it,
411
00:18:25,538 --> 00:18:27,049
So I'm going to law school,
412
00:18:27,073 --> 00:18:28,884
But I'm going to pay for it.
413
00:18:28,908 --> 00:18:30,374
You know, student loans,
414
00:18:30,410 --> 00:18:32,120
Part-time job,
Whatever it takes.
415
00:18:32,144 --> 00:18:34,512
Wow, you... You really
Do want to do this.
416
00:18:34,547 --> 00:18:37,215
More than anything I've
Wanted to do since this morning.
417
00:18:39,219 --> 00:18:41,385
Kidding.
418
00:18:41,421 --> 00:18:45,155
So... I get a wife
Who's a lawyer
419
00:18:45,191 --> 00:18:47,491
And I keep the
Money in the bank.
420
00:18:47,527 --> 00:18:49,360
Am I the best, or what?
421
00:18:49,395 --> 00:18:50,595
Oh!
422
00:18:50,630 --> 00:18:53,664
We have a great marriage.
423
00:18:53,700 --> 00:18:55,700
Hey...
424
00:18:55,735 --> 00:18:59,069
What do you think about
Us getting a snowmobile?
425
00:19:12,051 --> 00:19:13,517
Berg, wait, wait.
426
00:19:13,553 --> 00:19:15,231
I have nothing to say to you.
427
00:19:15,255 --> 00:19:17,588
In case you want to know,
I'm not going to albany,
428
00:19:17,624 --> 00:19:19,022
All right?
429
00:19:19,058 --> 00:19:21,559
I know that you can't ever
Understand what happened,
430
00:19:21,594 --> 00:19:23,861
And I know you don't
Want to hear the details,
431
00:19:23,896 --> 00:19:25,863
So here's the deal...
432
00:19:25,898 --> 00:19:28,399
I think your mom's amazing,
433
00:19:28,434 --> 00:19:32,370
But this whole thing isn't
Worth losing my best friend.
434
00:19:32,405 --> 00:19:33,571
Really?
435
00:19:33,606 --> 00:19:34,838
Yeah.
436
00:19:34,874 --> 00:19:36,440
So I-I'm going to call your mom
437
00:19:36,476 --> 00:19:38,376
And tell her that I
Can't see her anymore.
438
00:19:38,411 --> 00:19:40,177
You'd do that?
439
00:19:40,212 --> 00:19:41,379
Yeah.
440
00:19:41,414 --> 00:19:43,281
Yeah, and I think
What's important
441
00:19:43,316 --> 00:19:46,617
Is that we, you know,
Put all of this behind us
442
00:19:46,653 --> 00:19:49,119
And get back to the way we were.
443
00:19:49,155 --> 00:19:50,621
What do you say?
444
00:19:50,657 --> 00:19:51,922
Bite me.
445
00:20:06,339 --> 00:20:08,105
How you feeling?
446
00:20:08,140 --> 00:20:10,874
Great.
447
00:20:10,910 --> 00:20:13,243
Good, 'cause I have
A surprise for you.
448
00:20:13,279 --> 00:20:15,879
I baked you a "Please
Forgive me" muffin.
449
00:20:19,285 --> 00:20:21,619
Beautiful. Dessert.
450
00:20:25,891 --> 00:20:29,727
Listen, I am so sorry I
Disappointed you, berg.
451
00:20:29,762 --> 00:20:31,662
You know what? It's fine,
452
00:20:31,698 --> 00:20:33,731
'cause you are the
One person I know
453
00:20:33,766 --> 00:20:36,200
Who only acts out
Of good intentions.
454
00:20:36,235 --> 00:20:38,547
Listen, I want to be
A good girlfriend.
455
00:20:38,571 --> 00:20:41,372
I want to be there for
You, so from now on,
456
00:20:41,407 --> 00:20:44,007
If I don't agree with you,
I'll lie right to your face.
457
00:20:44,043 --> 00:20:47,812
Oh, thank you. Was
That so much to ask?
458
00:20:47,847 --> 00:20:49,380
We're a team, huh?
459
00:20:49,415 --> 00:20:50,381
We are.
460
00:20:50,416 --> 00:20:52,450
Go bergies!
461
00:20:52,485 --> 00:20:54,652
You're not going to
Make jerseys, are you?
462
00:20:54,687 --> 00:20:56,721
Oh, I have to.
463
00:21:10,069 --> 00:21:12,636
I think I may be full.
464
00:21:16,609 --> 00:21:20,043
I don't feel full.
465
00:21:20,079 --> 00:21:21,512
Okay.
466
00:21:26,552 --> 00:21:28,952
Where are you going?
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