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1
00:00:12,846 --> 00:00:15,647
Okay, I'm not saying yes...
2
00:00:18,486 --> 00:00:21,487
But tell me again
What colors you have.
3
00:00:25,893 --> 00:00:28,693
Oh, I just love
Having a boyfriend.
4
00:00:28,729 --> 00:00:31,263
You know, for my
First official act
5
00:00:31,298 --> 00:00:34,266
As your girlfriend, I'd
Love to throw your mother
6
00:00:34,301 --> 00:00:35,934
A "Welcome to boston" party.
7
00:00:35,969 --> 00:00:38,037
Sweetie, actually,
Since this pedicure
8
00:00:38,072 --> 00:00:39,638
Is so unexpectedly erotic,
9
00:00:39,673 --> 00:00:42,441
Can you make that your
Second official act?
10
00:00:42,476 --> 00:00:44,321
Okay, well, maybe
A party's too much.
11
00:00:44,345 --> 00:00:46,478
A luncheon, a tea...
12
00:00:46,514 --> 00:00:48,325
A boston tea
Party! Man, I'm good.
13
00:00:48,349 --> 00:00:49,948
You know what? Fine.
14
00:00:49,983 --> 00:00:51,716
If you do that, though,
15
00:00:51,752 --> 00:00:54,219
We're going to have
To tell pete about us,
16
00:00:54,255 --> 00:00:56,888
So just come on back
Down to the real world.
17
00:00:56,924 --> 00:00:59,724
Now, do you think
The glitter says sassy
18
00:00:59,760 --> 00:01:01,626
Or just weird?
19
00:01:08,102 --> 00:01:10,001
Let's tell pete.
20
00:01:10,037 --> 00:01:12,404
What? Are... Are you sure?
21
00:01:12,440 --> 00:01:14,551
Yes. We've been
Dating for a full week,
22
00:01:14,575 --> 00:01:16,653
Sleeping together
For several months.
23
00:01:16,677 --> 00:01:18,621
I think we're on
Pretty solid ground.
24
00:01:18,645 --> 00:01:20,946
Well, it would
Definitely take a load
25
00:01:20,981 --> 00:01:22,747
Off of my shoulders.
26
00:01:22,783 --> 00:01:25,117
I'm getting pretty
Tired of explaining
27
00:01:25,152 --> 00:01:28,753
"Hello, kitty" underwear
In the laundry basket.
28
00:01:28,789 --> 00:01:30,855
This just feels right, you know?
29
00:01:30,891 --> 00:01:32,936
And the sooner you tell him,
30
00:01:32,960 --> 00:01:35,472
The sooner he can
Start the healing.
31
00:01:35,496 --> 00:01:37,796
What healing?
32
00:01:37,831 --> 00:01:39,864
Well, betrayal by the person
33
00:01:39,900 --> 00:01:43,302
He thought was his
Best friend, you goose.
34
00:01:43,337 --> 00:01:45,337
Betrayal? Hold on a second.
35
00:01:45,372 --> 00:01:48,039
I didn't betray him. All right?
36
00:01:48,075 --> 00:01:49,575
You had a thing for him,
37
00:01:49,610 --> 00:01:51,254
And he didn't have
A thing for you.
38
00:01:51,278 --> 00:01:53,345
Yeah, okay. But he's
Bound to be insulted
39
00:01:53,380 --> 00:01:55,547
That you've been lying
To him all this time.
40
00:01:55,583 --> 00:01:57,294
Look, irene, no offense, okay,
41
00:01:57,318 --> 00:01:59,718
But I think I know
Pete a little bit better
42
00:01:59,753 --> 00:02:02,099
Than you do, all right?
He's going to be just fine.
43
00:02:02,123 --> 00:02:05,257
God, I wish it was
Sandal weather!
44
00:02:14,168 --> 00:02:15,867
Did you hear that?
45
00:02:20,207 --> 00:02:21,406
Do you think that was berg?
46
00:02:21,442 --> 00:02:24,109
Pete, you drew the shades,
You locked the door.
47
00:02:24,145 --> 00:02:26,845
He's not getting in unless
He comes down the chimney.
48
00:02:26,880 --> 00:02:29,281
Do you think I should
Close the flue?
49
00:02:29,316 --> 00:02:30,749
Come here.
50
00:02:32,819 --> 00:02:34,353
Mmm.
51
00:02:34,388 --> 00:02:36,321
You're getting a little scruffy.
52
00:02:36,357 --> 00:02:38,335
Oh. Yeah, I'm growing a goatee.
53
00:02:38,359 --> 00:02:40,792
All the guys at the
Firehouse have one.
54
00:02:40,827 --> 00:02:42,394
Do you like it?
55
00:02:42,429 --> 00:02:45,164
It's going to be
Great when it fills in.
56
00:02:45,199 --> 00:02:47,266
I bet you're the
Manly kind of guy
57
00:02:47,301 --> 00:02:49,668
Who can do that in a week.
58
00:02:49,703 --> 00:02:53,238
This is 10 days.
59
00:02:53,274 --> 00:02:54,973
Well, give it time.
60
00:02:55,008 --> 00:02:57,442
I just love a man with a beard.
61
00:03:01,114 --> 00:03:03,649
You know, susan, I
Just want to tell you
62
00:03:03,684 --> 00:03:05,562
That I've never been happier.
63
00:03:05,586 --> 00:03:08,153
But I'm really worried.
What if berg found out?
64
00:03:08,189 --> 00:03:10,189
Pete, I raised an understanding
65
00:03:10,224 --> 00:03:11,756
And sensitive son.
66
00:03:11,792 --> 00:03:15,294
Once he sees how happy I
Am, I know he'll be pleased.
67
00:03:15,329 --> 00:03:17,274
And this other son of yours...
68
00:03:17,298 --> 00:03:19,064
Will he talk to berg?
69
00:03:21,001 --> 00:03:23,735
Berg: ow!
70
00:03:26,006 --> 00:03:28,173
Pete, why is the door locked?
71
00:03:28,209 --> 00:03:31,910
Oh, god. Now he knows
The door's locked.
72
00:03:31,945 --> 00:03:34,979
Pete, just stay calm.
Everything will be all right.
73
00:03:36,883 --> 00:03:38,883
Hi, michael.
74
00:03:40,654 --> 00:03:43,054
Mom, why is the door locked?
75
00:03:43,090 --> 00:03:45,502
Well, you know,
It's the big city,
76
00:03:45,526 --> 00:03:49,761
And I don't feel safe with
Just pete in the house.
77
00:03:49,796 --> 00:03:52,797
It's true. I couldn't save
Her from an intruder.
78
00:03:52,833 --> 00:03:55,867
I-I bruise like a peach.
79
00:03:58,038 --> 00:04:00,539
Listen, uh, pete, I
Want to talk about
80
00:04:00,574 --> 00:04:02,874
What's been going on
When I'm not around.
81
00:04:02,909 --> 00:04:04,843
Wh-what?
82
00:04:04,878 --> 00:04:07,045
I think we need to
Have a discussion.
83
00:04:07,080 --> 00:04:09,748
No, I can't, because
I-I have to go...
84
00:04:09,783 --> 00:04:11,717
Job... Thing... Fire.
85
00:04:13,887 --> 00:04:17,556
Did he eat some cake earlier?
86
00:04:21,995 --> 00:04:24,329
Hey, shar, do you or johnny
87
00:04:24,365 --> 00:04:27,566
Have anything to
Help grow facial hair?
88
00:04:27,601 --> 00:04:28,800
What for?
89
00:04:28,835 --> 00:04:30,869
It's not very good, is it?
90
00:04:30,904 --> 00:04:32,937
It's just... It's not
Growing in right here
91
00:04:32,973 --> 00:04:34,873
And here and here and here.
92
00:04:34,908 --> 00:04:36,241
Sit down.
93
00:04:36,277 --> 00:04:39,278
I am going to take
Such good care of you.
94
00:04:39,313 --> 00:04:40,779
All right.
95
00:04:40,814 --> 00:04:43,749
Whoa! Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
96
00:04:43,784 --> 00:04:45,984
Come on, I'm not
Going to wear makeup.
97
00:04:46,019 --> 00:04:47,864
How vain do you think I am?
98
00:04:47,888 --> 00:04:50,054
I also have some stuff
For the puffy eyes.
99
00:04:50,090 --> 00:04:51,970
Really? I've tried everything.
100
00:05:06,907 --> 00:05:09,207
Aah! Aah!
101
00:05:12,078 --> 00:05:15,079
Don't do that!
102
00:05:15,115 --> 00:05:18,550
I had to. I just
Had an iced tea.
103
00:05:23,490 --> 00:05:26,925
All right, look, I, uh,
I need to talk to you.
104
00:05:26,960 --> 00:05:29,361
First of all,
105
00:05:29,396 --> 00:05:32,698
The goatee grew in really fast.
106
00:05:34,668 --> 00:05:37,001
Second of all, I have
To ask you something.
107
00:05:37,037 --> 00:05:39,037
How long have we
Been friends, pete?
108
00:05:39,072 --> 00:05:41,540
I don't know.
109
00:05:41,575 --> 00:05:44,676
Yeah, it's been
Special for me, too.
110
00:05:44,712 --> 00:05:47,011
Look, uh, how would you feel
111
00:05:47,047 --> 00:05:50,382
If one of us kept a secret
From the other one?
112
00:05:50,417 --> 00:05:53,485
Why would you ask me that?
113
00:05:53,520 --> 00:05:55,498
No reason, but let's just say
114
00:05:55,522 --> 00:05:57,434
One of us did something
That some people
115
00:05:57,458 --> 00:05:58,790
Might consider shocking,
116
00:05:58,826 --> 00:06:01,292
And I kept it from you, or
You did something shocking
117
00:06:01,328 --> 00:06:03,428
And kept it secret from me.
118
00:06:03,464 --> 00:06:05,074
I'm not keeping a
Secret from you.
119
00:06:05,098 --> 00:06:06,865
I'm not saying you are.
120
00:06:06,900 --> 00:06:10,001
But, uh, let's just say you are.
121
00:06:10,036 --> 00:06:13,972
Let's say you are.
How do you like that?
122
00:06:14,007 --> 00:06:16,107
There's no need
To get defensive.
123
00:06:16,142 --> 00:06:18,254
Now you're accusing
Me of being defensive?
124
00:06:18,278 --> 00:06:19,411
I'm not.
125
00:06:19,446 --> 00:06:21,413
Sounds like you are.
126
00:06:21,448 --> 00:06:23,582
I'm not. Look,
Everyone has secrets.
127
00:06:23,617 --> 00:06:24,949
I don't. I don't.
128
00:06:24,985 --> 00:06:26,896
And if you do, just
Keep them to yourself.
129
00:06:26,920 --> 00:06:28,687
What?
130
00:06:28,722 --> 00:06:31,322
We may be best friends,
But we're also guys,
131
00:06:31,358 --> 00:06:33,992
And guys don't have to share
Each and every mushy emotion
132
00:06:34,027 --> 00:06:36,072
With each other, all right?
133
00:06:36,096 --> 00:06:38,263
We need boundaries.
134
00:06:38,298 --> 00:06:39,664
Deal?
135
00:06:39,700 --> 00:06:41,065
Deal.
136
00:06:41,101 --> 00:06:42,734
Come here.
137
00:06:44,772 --> 00:06:46,471
Sweetie?
138
00:06:46,507 --> 00:06:47,839
Johnny: in here.
139
00:06:47,875 --> 00:06:49,875
Have you seen my cell phone?
140
00:06:49,910 --> 00:06:52,411
Just call yourself
And let it ring.
141
00:06:52,446 --> 00:06:53,879
Good idea.
142
00:06:53,914 --> 00:06:56,347
I hope I don't answer.
That would freak me out.
143
00:07:01,789 --> 00:07:04,856
Uh, baby, do you have the paper?
144
00:07:04,892 --> 00:07:07,893
In with me. I'm doing
The crossword.
145
00:07:07,928 --> 00:07:09,861
Good.
146
00:07:11,598 --> 00:07:13,532
Oh, my gosh.
147
00:07:20,106 --> 00:07:21,740
Find your phone?
148
00:07:21,775 --> 00:07:24,242
Nope. I found something better.
149
00:07:24,277 --> 00:07:26,210
I'll talk to you later.
150
00:07:31,351 --> 00:07:33,084
What was that for?
151
00:07:33,119 --> 00:07:34,953
'cause I love you.
152
00:07:34,988 --> 00:07:36,855
Hey, shar.
153
00:07:36,890 --> 00:07:38,523
Hi!
154
00:07:38,559 --> 00:07:41,760
Wow. You seem
Cheery this morning.
155
00:07:41,795 --> 00:07:43,261
Yeah, it's my husband.
156
00:07:43,296 --> 00:07:45,730
He knows how to
Keep me very happy.
157
00:07:47,367 --> 00:07:48,800
So what did you do?
158
00:07:48,836 --> 00:07:50,769
I never know.
159
00:07:54,174 --> 00:07:55,919
So, you wanted to see me?
160
00:07:55,943 --> 00:07:58,376
Yes. Yes.
161
00:07:58,411 --> 00:08:00,645
I have a little
Thank-you present
162
00:08:00,681 --> 00:08:03,482
For the very lucrative
Stock tip you gave me.
163
00:08:03,517 --> 00:08:04,983
Oh, johnny!
164
00:08:06,653 --> 00:08:08,286
This is beautiful.
165
00:08:08,321 --> 00:08:10,154
Yeah, well, it should be.
166
00:08:10,190 --> 00:08:13,592
The guy at the yard sale
Screwed me out of 5 bucks.
167
00:08:13,627 --> 00:08:15,672
Johnny, this is vintage chanel.
168
00:08:15,696 --> 00:08:17,562
It's got to be worth $500.
169
00:08:17,598 --> 00:08:19,664
$500?
170
00:08:19,700 --> 00:08:22,333
You want it back?
171
00:08:22,369 --> 00:08:24,703
No.
172
00:08:26,773 --> 00:08:29,240
Well... No.
173
00:08:29,275 --> 00:08:32,176
I just wanted to
Remind you not to tell,
174
00:08:32,212 --> 00:08:35,313
You know, sharon about
All the money I made.
175
00:08:35,348 --> 00:08:37,126
I can't lie to sharon.
She's my friend.
176
00:08:37,150 --> 00:08:39,985
All right, then give
Me the scarf back.
177
00:08:40,020 --> 00:08:42,821
Then again, sharon doesn't
Go with my favorite blouse.
178
00:08:47,561 --> 00:08:50,128
Irene, what are you
Doing here so early?
179
00:08:50,163 --> 00:08:52,241
I'm setting up for
The party, slowpoke.
180
00:08:52,265 --> 00:08:54,511
See, I made goody
Bags for all our guests
181
00:08:54,535 --> 00:08:55,901
Commemorating our love.
182
00:08:55,936 --> 00:08:57,680
There are chocolate kisses,
183
00:08:57,704 --> 00:08:58,948
A "Berg and irene" potholder,
184
00:08:58,972 --> 00:09:01,172
And a whistle.
185
00:09:01,207 --> 00:09:03,274
Wow, this is great stuff, irene,
186
00:09:03,309 --> 00:09:05,276
But don't you think
We should maybe
187
00:09:05,311 --> 00:09:07,278
Put the brakes on the party?
188
00:09:07,313 --> 00:09:09,380
I'm just thinking, my
Mom just got divorced...
189
00:09:09,416 --> 00:09:11,661
You didn't talk
To pete, did you?
190
00:09:11,685 --> 00:09:14,385
I tried. He got so defensive.
191
00:09:14,421 --> 00:09:17,188
It's because you're
Embarrassed of me, isn't it?
192
00:09:17,223 --> 00:09:19,958
Oh, god, irene, why do
You always go there?
193
00:09:19,993 --> 00:09:21,526
I mean...
194
00:09:25,498 --> 00:09:27,699
Yeah, you know, it's okay.
195
00:09:27,734 --> 00:09:29,801
I know how people see me.
196
00:09:29,836 --> 00:09:31,803
I'm a joke, a laughingstock.
197
00:09:31,838 --> 00:09:35,173
When I was little, you know
What they used to call me?
198
00:09:35,208 --> 00:09:37,943
Judy.
199
00:09:43,617 --> 00:09:45,584
Wh-why?
200
00:09:45,619 --> 00:09:48,119
Why... Why would
They call you that?
201
00:09:48,154 --> 00:09:50,567
'cause judy was
The class doofus,
202
00:09:50,591 --> 00:09:53,324
And then she moved...
Little redheaded freak!
203
00:09:53,359 --> 00:09:55,326
Oh, no, no, no. Hey, come here.
204
00:09:55,361 --> 00:09:57,395
Look, hey... No, no, no, no.
205
00:09:57,430 --> 00:09:59,464
No one is laughing at you.
206
00:09:59,499 --> 00:10:00,910
Yeah, well, that's
Sweet of you, berg.
207
00:10:00,934 --> 00:10:03,012
Not many people can appreciate
208
00:10:03,036 --> 00:10:05,870
My creative ways of
Dealing with an unkind world.
209
00:10:05,906 --> 00:10:07,784
I guess I just can't blame you
210
00:10:07,808 --> 00:10:09,407
For not telling pete.
211
00:10:09,442 --> 00:10:11,342
You've got it all wrong, though,
212
00:10:11,377 --> 00:10:13,277
'cause I did tell pete.
213
00:10:13,313 --> 00:10:14,779
I did.
214
00:10:14,815 --> 00:10:16,314
I did.
215
00:10:16,349 --> 00:10:18,850
Um... And he didn't
Laugh at all, you know.
216
00:10:18,885 --> 00:10:23,354
In fact, he didn't
Take it very well.
217
00:10:23,389 --> 00:10:24,789
Really?
218
00:10:24,825 --> 00:10:27,125
Yes, really. Really. Um, really.
219
00:10:27,160 --> 00:10:29,961
In fact, you know,
If I hadn't been there,
220
00:10:29,997 --> 00:10:32,497
I think that he
Might have cried.
221
00:10:32,532 --> 00:10:34,611
Gosh, well, I must talk to him.
222
00:10:34,635 --> 00:10:36,846
We must talk and clear the air.
223
00:10:36,870 --> 00:10:40,005
Oh, but now he's probably
Not coming to the party.
224
00:10:40,040 --> 00:10:42,473
Well, he's still
Coming to the party.
225
00:10:42,509 --> 00:10:43,574
Okay.
226
00:10:43,610 --> 00:10:45,276
But I... You know,
227
00:10:45,311 --> 00:10:47,979
I think he's just going
To need some space.
228
00:10:48,015 --> 00:10:51,716
Nonsense. He needs comforting,
229
00:10:51,752 --> 00:10:54,285
Two potholders for pete.
230
00:10:54,320 --> 00:10:55,920
Ha ha.
231
00:10:55,956 --> 00:10:57,722
That's good.
232
00:10:57,758 --> 00:11:00,191
God, I hope there's
Booze at this tea party.
233
00:11:05,498 --> 00:11:07,298
Honey, you dressed
For the party?
234
00:11:07,333 --> 00:11:08,933
Come on, baby,
235
00:11:08,969 --> 00:11:11,536
You know I only have
One pair of pants.
236
00:11:14,107 --> 00:11:17,075
Johnny, I can't go
To the party like this.
237
00:11:17,110 --> 00:11:18,910
Well, change your shoes.
238
00:11:18,945 --> 00:11:20,979
No, no, no. The
Shoes are perfect.
239
00:11:21,014 --> 00:11:23,347
It's the dress. The
Dress is too plain.
240
00:11:23,383 --> 00:11:25,349
I need something
To bring it alive,
241
00:11:25,385 --> 00:11:27,752
And my neck is cold.
242
00:11:27,788 --> 00:11:29,766
Baby, you don't
Need accessories.
243
00:11:29,790 --> 00:11:32,323
You're fully loaded.
244
00:11:32,358 --> 00:11:35,626
Nothing? Not like
A belt, a scarf,
245
00:11:35,662 --> 00:11:39,097
Necklace, scarf?
246
00:11:39,132 --> 00:11:41,332
No, baby, I think
You're beautiful
247
00:11:41,367 --> 00:11:42,934
Just the way you are.
248
00:11:42,969 --> 00:11:44,202
Ha ha ha ha ha!
249
00:11:44,237 --> 00:11:47,471
Oh, I found the scarf...
250
00:11:47,507 --> 00:11:49,174
Right there in the bag.
251
00:11:49,209 --> 00:11:51,309
See, now I found it.
You have to give it to me.
252
00:11:51,344 --> 00:11:53,678
That's how the game works.
253
00:11:53,714 --> 00:11:55,958
Yeah, oh, well, you know what?
254
00:11:55,982 --> 00:11:58,260
I-I am... I am so angry with you
255
00:11:58,284 --> 00:12:01,319
For snooping and spoiling
Your gift, that you...
256
00:12:01,354 --> 00:12:03,955
You may or may
Not get this scarf.
257
00:12:03,990 --> 00:12:05,824
Well, johnny...
258
00:12:05,859 --> 00:12:08,159
You keep pushing,
And it's going to be one
259
00:12:08,195 --> 00:12:10,962
In a completely different color.
260
00:12:13,033 --> 00:12:18,336
So... Is everyone
Having a nice time?
261
00:12:18,371 --> 00:12:19,849
Yeah, sharon wanted
To watch the game,
262
00:12:19,873 --> 00:12:23,341
But I said, no, no, no,
Let's got to the tea party.
263
00:12:27,380 --> 00:12:29,225
Johnny, I don't
Have time to explain,
264
00:12:29,249 --> 00:12:32,884
But can you keep irene
From pete until I talk to him?
265
00:12:32,919 --> 00:12:34,485
Why?
266
00:12:34,520 --> 00:12:37,321
Right, allow me to
Take the time to explain.
267
00:12:37,357 --> 00:12:40,058
I told irene I told
Pete about us,
268
00:12:40,093 --> 00:12:41,626
And I didn't.
269
00:12:41,661 --> 00:12:44,629
Kids used to call her
Judy. Isn't that enough?
270
00:12:44,664 --> 00:12:46,297
Berg, I'm sorry.
271
00:12:46,332 --> 00:12:48,900
You might live by
The lie, all right,
272
00:12:48,935 --> 00:12:51,602
But johnny donnelly
Only speaks the truth.
273
00:12:51,638 --> 00:12:53,371
Sharon?
274
00:12:53,406 --> 00:12:55,874
I'll do it.
275
00:12:55,909 --> 00:12:57,220
Pete, there you are.
276
00:12:57,244 --> 00:12:58,254
Listen, I need to
Talk to you, okay?
277
00:12:58,278 --> 00:12:59,889
And we need to talk right now.
278
00:12:59,913 --> 00:13:01,357
Peter, it is so nice to see you.
279
00:13:01,381 --> 00:13:03,748
Oh, you poor, poor thing.
280
00:13:03,784 --> 00:13:06,717
Come. Let's sit down
And mend some fences.
281
00:13:06,753 --> 00:13:08,820
Just you and me? All
Right, let's talk right now
282
00:13:08,855 --> 00:13:12,423
Whoa. See, irene, I told you.
He's just not ready right now.
283
00:13:12,458 --> 00:13:14,804
Um, some of the goody
Bags don't have whistles.
284
00:13:14,828 --> 00:13:16,261
Oh, gall dang it.
285
00:13:16,296 --> 00:13:19,430
Pete... Hey, berg.
286
00:13:19,465 --> 00:13:21,277
Ah! Okay, what's
With the camera?
287
00:13:21,301 --> 00:13:23,734
It's helpful for capturing
Those special moments
288
00:13:23,770 --> 00:13:27,338
So when I wake up tomorrow
I'll know this wasn't a dream.
289
00:13:27,373 --> 00:13:30,108
Hey, ash, um, I didn't
Get your r.S.V.P.
290
00:13:30,143 --> 00:13:34,045
Okay, no goody bag.
291
00:13:34,080 --> 00:13:37,048
Hey, johnny, you like my scarf?
292
00:13:37,083 --> 00:13:40,351
No, no, no. Take
It off, take it off.
293
00:13:40,386 --> 00:13:42,626
I'm sorry. Look... Just,
Um, sharon saw the scarf
294
00:13:42,655 --> 00:13:44,733
And thought it was for her,
295
00:13:44,757 --> 00:13:47,091
So I lied and told her it was.
296
00:13:47,127 --> 00:13:50,561
Oh, my god. And to think
I almost didn't wear it.
297
00:13:50,596 --> 00:13:52,563
So can I have it back, please?
298
00:13:52,598 --> 00:13:54,165
Oh, come on, johnny.
299
00:13:54,201 --> 00:13:56,868
Someday we'll look
Back at this and laugh,
300
00:13:56,903 --> 00:13:59,403
Especially when we
Look at these photos.
301
00:13:59,439 --> 00:14:01,306
Hello, everybody.
Hello, mrs. Bergen.
302
00:14:01,341 --> 00:14:02,506
Hello, pete.
303
00:14:02,542 --> 00:14:03,552
Hello, mom. Hello, pete.
304
00:14:03,576 --> 00:14:04,608
Goodbye, berg.
305
00:14:05,745 --> 00:14:07,045
Mrs. Bergen,
306
00:14:07,080 --> 00:14:10,481
I just want to remind you
How fond I am of your son.
307
00:14:10,516 --> 00:14:13,517
My intentions are good
As are my prospects
308
00:14:13,553 --> 00:14:15,887
For a full integration
Into society.
309
00:14:19,826 --> 00:14:22,227
Hi there. We need to talk.
310
00:14:22,262 --> 00:14:23,794
Berg...
311
00:14:23,830 --> 00:14:26,731
So, anyway, there's a whole
Sea full of fish out there,
312
00:14:26,766 --> 00:14:28,233
So buck up.
313
00:14:28,268 --> 00:14:30,835
Oh, boy. You two aren't
Fighting over me, are you?
314
00:14:30,871 --> 00:14:32,337
No.
315
00:14:32,372 --> 00:14:33,838
Yeah. You jerk.
316
00:14:33,874 --> 00:14:35,340
Anyway, irene, um, look,
317
00:14:35,375 --> 00:14:37,909
My mom seems a little
Bit lonely over there.
318
00:14:37,944 --> 00:14:40,144
Could you go keep her company?
319
00:14:40,180 --> 00:14:41,512
Oh, she misses me.
320
00:14:41,547 --> 00:14:43,414
Pete, um...
321
00:14:43,449 --> 00:14:45,350
You know, I never
Really believed
322
00:14:45,385 --> 00:14:48,353
That men look for women who
Remind them of their mothers,
323
00:14:48,388 --> 00:14:49,988
But, well, hello,
324
00:14:50,023 --> 00:14:52,123
It's like looking in a mirror.
325
00:14:52,158 --> 00:14:53,557
Hey, johnny.
326
00:14:53,593 --> 00:14:55,159
Oh, jeez.
327
00:14:55,195 --> 00:14:56,460
Johnny!
328
00:14:56,496 --> 00:14:57,962
Look, could somebody...
329
00:14:57,998 --> 00:15:01,032
Could you please tell
Me why pete is avoiding me?
330
00:15:01,067 --> 00:15:02,800
Oh...
331
00:15:02,835 --> 00:15:05,904
He probably doesn't want you
To know he's wearing makeup.
332
00:15:10,643 --> 00:15:12,944
So that's why his
Eyes aren't so puffy.
333
00:15:12,979 --> 00:15:17,848
Yes...
334
00:15:17,884 --> 00:15:20,318
And that's why his
Goatee grew in overnight.
335
00:15:20,353 --> 00:15:23,187
Hey, let me butch up
Those eyebrows for you.
336
00:15:23,223 --> 00:15:24,688
Hey, sharon.
337
00:15:24,724 --> 00:15:26,124
Hey.
338
00:15:26,159 --> 00:15:27,658
That scarf.
339
00:15:27,693 --> 00:15:29,093
Yeah. Boy, it's ugly.
340
00:15:29,129 --> 00:15:31,529
Well, it looks like
The party is over.
341
00:15:31,564 --> 00:15:33,409
Come on, sweetie, let's go.
342
00:15:33,433 --> 00:15:34,899
No, johnny, wait.
343
00:15:34,935 --> 00:15:36,845
Ash, where did
You get that scarf?
344
00:15:36,869 --> 00:15:38,903
Johnny gave it to me.
345
00:15:38,939 --> 00:15:40,204
What?
346
00:15:40,240 --> 00:15:42,606
He gave it to me as a thank you
347
00:15:42,642 --> 00:15:44,675
For the stock tip I gave to you.
348
00:15:44,710 --> 00:15:46,710
He gave you an expensive scarf
349
00:15:46,746 --> 00:15:49,113
For a stock tip that
Made him 20 bucks?
350
00:15:49,149 --> 00:15:51,482
Yeah, I know. That
Doesn't sound like me.
351
00:15:51,517 --> 00:15:53,351
20 bucks?
352
00:15:53,386 --> 00:15:55,987
Johnny, I thought you
Said you made $90,000.
353
00:15:56,022 --> 00:16:00,358
What?
354
00:16:00,393 --> 00:16:03,727
Oh, good news,
Honey. We're rich.
355
00:16:03,763 --> 00:16:10,534
Hey, johnny... Speak
Your truth, man.
356
00:16:13,906 --> 00:16:15,440
Are you all right?
357
00:16:15,475 --> 00:16:17,108
Oh, perfect, perfect.
358
00:16:17,143 --> 00:16:19,777
Let's avoid suspicion by
Hanging out in my room.
359
00:16:23,316 --> 00:16:25,516
Pete, you need to relax.
360
00:16:25,551 --> 00:16:28,031
Relax? How do you
Expect me to relax?
361
00:16:32,525 --> 00:16:34,993
All right, I'll kiss,
But I will not relax!
362
00:16:37,230 --> 00:16:38,696
Don't toy with me.
363
00:16:38,731 --> 00:16:40,865
Is this some kind of cruel joke?
364
00:16:40,900 --> 00:16:42,867
Do we really have $90,000?
365
00:16:42,902 --> 00:16:44,402
It's not $90,000.
366
00:16:44,437 --> 00:16:49,140
It's barely $89,432.
367
00:16:49,175 --> 00:16:50,953
So it's... It's
True. We're rich?
368
00:16:50,977 --> 00:16:52,443
Yeah.
369
00:16:52,479 --> 00:16:54,078
We're rich.
370
00:16:54,114 --> 00:16:57,215
My mom was wrong about you.
371
00:16:57,250 --> 00:16:59,250
Stop right there!
Hold it, hold it!
372
00:16:59,285 --> 00:17:02,186
I know why you're avoiding me.
373
00:17:02,222 --> 00:17:03,754
You do?
374
00:17:03,789 --> 00:17:06,590
Yes, I do, and you're
Not going anywhere
375
00:17:06,626 --> 00:17:08,493
Until we clear
The air right here.
376
00:17:18,405 --> 00:17:23,107
Why is everyone staring at me?
377
00:17:23,143 --> 00:17:24,708
Did I miss something?
378
00:17:24,744 --> 00:17:26,024
Not the big finish.
379
00:17:28,281 --> 00:17:30,781
Mom, what's that?
380
00:17:30,816 --> 00:17:35,819
What's what?
381
00:17:35,855 --> 00:17:41,259
Wipe your face, wipe your face!
382
00:17:41,294 --> 00:17:43,161
Are those... Are
Those smudge marks?
383
00:17:43,196 --> 00:17:45,530
Michael, I never
Told you this before,
384
00:17:45,565 --> 00:17:47,131
But I'm very hairy,
385
00:17:47,167 --> 00:17:49,167
And I haven't had a
Moment to bleach.
386
00:17:49,202 --> 00:17:52,036
Sharon told me about
The eyebrow pencil.
387
00:17:52,072 --> 00:17:54,838
I am hardly the issue right now.
388
00:17:54,874 --> 00:17:56,740
Your goatee rubbed off
389
00:17:56,776 --> 00:17:59,477
And made a perfect little
Goatee on my mother.
390
00:17:59,512 --> 00:18:03,381
I mean, that's... That's just...
391
00:18:03,416 --> 00:18:07,685
Why was your face
Rubbing my mother's, pete?
392
00:18:07,720 --> 00:18:13,057
All right, all right! If
You just let me explain.
393
00:18:13,093 --> 00:18:14,525
I can't explain.
394
00:18:14,561 --> 00:18:16,427
I knew you had
Trouble getting women,
395
00:18:16,463 --> 00:18:17,473
But to stoop down to my mother.
396
00:18:17,497 --> 00:18:22,066
Stoop? Have you
Seen your mother?
397
00:18:22,102 --> 00:18:24,302
Okay, look, you can't fault pete
398
00:18:24,337 --> 00:18:26,804
For keeping his romance a secret
399
00:18:26,839 --> 00:18:28,806
When it took you until today
400
00:18:28,841 --> 00:18:30,801
To tell him about our affair.
401
00:18:36,382 --> 00:18:40,585
Wh-what affair?
402
00:18:40,620 --> 00:18:42,987
Berg, you didn't
Talk to him, did you?
403
00:18:43,022 --> 00:18:44,989
Could we please talk about this
404
00:18:45,024 --> 00:18:46,991
When my life isn't
Falling apart?
405
00:18:47,026 --> 00:18:50,495
Okay. Pete, berg and I
Are lovers 48 times over.
406
00:18:50,530 --> 00:18:52,497
All right, you know what?
407
00:18:52,532 --> 00:18:55,065
If the two of you are
Sleeping together,
408
00:18:55,101 --> 00:18:57,067
I think we'd all know about it.
409
00:18:57,103 --> 00:18:58,103
Sharon: I knew.
410
00:18:58,138 --> 00:18:59,138
I knew.
411
00:18:59,172 --> 00:19:00,172
I knew.
412
00:19:00,206 --> 00:19:02,072
Even I knew.
413
00:19:04,210 --> 00:19:08,246
I can't... You lied to me?
We're best friends, berg.
414
00:19:08,281 --> 00:19:09,525
Doesn't that mean
Anything to you?
415
00:19:09,549 --> 00:19:14,318
Your beard is on my mother!
416
00:19:16,889 --> 00:19:20,558
All right, that's
It. I'm out of here.
417
00:19:26,266 --> 00:19:28,810
Michael... I don't
Want to talk to you.
418
00:19:28,834 --> 00:19:30,268
I know you're mad.
419
00:19:30,303 --> 00:19:32,181
No, I'm not mad. I'm humiliated.
420
00:19:32,205 --> 00:19:33,404
How could you do that,
421
00:19:33,439 --> 00:19:35,284
And would you please wipe off
422
00:19:35,308 --> 00:19:39,810
The rest of that mustache?
423
00:19:39,845 --> 00:19:42,246
I was lonely. Pete was, too.
424
00:19:42,282 --> 00:19:45,816
It was two people
Finding each other.
425
00:19:45,851 --> 00:19:47,396
Now, I would understand
Your being upset
426
00:19:47,420 --> 00:19:48,619
If it was purely sexual...
427
00:19:48,655 --> 00:19:51,789
Mm-hmm, I'm listening. Mm-hmm.
428
00:19:51,824 --> 00:19:54,525
What is so awful
About me being happy?
429
00:19:54,561 --> 00:19:56,539
There's nothing awful
About you being happy.
430
00:19:56,563 --> 00:19:58,874
It's you being happy
With my best friend.
431
00:19:58,898 --> 00:20:00,309
Did it ever occur
To either one of you
432
00:20:00,333 --> 00:20:01,932
How this would make me feel?
433
00:20:01,967 --> 00:20:04,302
Yes, honey. That's
Why we kept it a secret.
434
00:20:06,406 --> 00:20:07,416
You kept it a secret
435
00:20:07,440 --> 00:20:12,610
Because you knew it was wrong.
436
00:20:12,645 --> 00:20:14,078
I'm sorry if I hurt you,
437
00:20:14,113 --> 00:20:16,880
But I'm not going to apologize
438
00:20:16,916 --> 00:20:19,183
For what happened
Between pete and me.
439
00:20:19,219 --> 00:20:22,420
Then I guess there's
Nothing left to say.
440
00:20:22,455 --> 00:20:23,554
I want you to know
441
00:20:23,590 --> 00:20:27,358
That I had my toes
Done for this party.
442
00:20:29,262 --> 00:20:30,573
So I guess I should've told you
443
00:20:30,597 --> 00:20:33,964
The pencil wasn't smudge-proof.
444
00:20:33,999 --> 00:20:36,767
You think?
445
00:20:36,802 --> 00:20:37,802
What have I done?
446
00:20:37,837 --> 00:20:39,237
I have never seen berg this mad.
447
00:20:39,272 --> 00:20:40,949
Hey, he'll calm down, you know?
448
00:20:40,973 --> 00:20:43,441
He's been through a big shock.
449
00:20:43,476 --> 00:20:44,609
I tell you,
450
00:20:44,644 --> 00:20:47,478
I'm never keeping a
Secret from a friend again.
451
00:20:47,513 --> 00:20:48,879
You know,
452
00:20:48,914 --> 00:20:50,492
No matter how painful
The truth might be,
453
00:20:50,516 --> 00:20:51,549
It's always more painful
454
00:20:51,584 --> 00:20:53,618
Keeping the truth
From someone you love.
455
00:20:53,653 --> 00:20:55,419
Yeah, I think you're right.
456
00:20:55,455 --> 00:20:56,487
Yeah, buddy.
457
00:20:56,522 --> 00:20:58,188
I burned down your house.
458
00:21:05,064 --> 00:21:11,101
And, uh... And, uh...
459
00:21:11,137 --> 00:21:13,837
Can you see the struggle?
460
00:21:13,873 --> 00:21:17,040
Uh-huh, yes. Stay there.
461
00:21:17,076 --> 00:21:19,777
It's good. I'm milking, okay?
32013
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