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1
00:00:12,279 --> 00:00:15,180
Okay, this is exactly
What I'm talking about...
2
00:00:15,216 --> 00:00:17,349
$85 for a sweater.
3
00:00:17,385 --> 00:00:18,817
Sweater? What sweater?
4
00:00:18,852 --> 00:00:20,612
Oh, right, I bought
That for you.
5
00:00:22,689 --> 00:00:25,124
From yougogal.Com?
6
00:00:30,097 --> 00:00:32,364
Johnny, it's a stupid sweater.
7
00:00:32,400 --> 00:00:35,767
Get over it. I
Don't even wear it.
8
00:00:35,802 --> 00:00:40,372
I just met the most
Charming man on the train.
9
00:00:40,408 --> 00:00:42,707
He was standing
Very close to me.
10
00:00:42,743 --> 00:00:45,210
The smell of gin
And polish sausage
11
00:00:45,246 --> 00:00:46,545
Was invigorating.
12
00:00:46,580 --> 00:00:48,813
And just about
The time he started
13
00:00:48,849 --> 00:00:51,050
"Accidentally"
Rubbing up against me,
14
00:00:51,085 --> 00:00:53,052
I knew I had to have him.
15
00:00:53,087 --> 00:00:54,986
I was just about to shout,
16
00:00:55,022 --> 00:00:57,556
"Spend the rest of
Your life with me,"
17
00:00:57,591 --> 00:00:59,958
When a policeman
Got on the train
18
00:00:59,993 --> 00:01:02,294
And scared him
Away. Damn the law.
19
00:01:02,329 --> 00:01:04,563
Well, ashley, we
Have some great news.
20
00:01:04,598 --> 00:01:07,666
Oh, yeah. Just when you
Thought it couldn't happen,
21
00:01:07,701 --> 00:01:09,368
Johnny got cheaper.
22
00:01:12,106 --> 00:01:15,441
Okay, that's not quite it.
23
00:01:15,476 --> 00:01:18,177
We can't afford this
Place on my salary.
24
00:01:18,212 --> 00:01:20,123
We've been given a
Great opportunity
25
00:01:20,147 --> 00:01:21,980
To live rent free.
26
00:01:22,015 --> 00:01:24,027
In the basement.
Isn't that exciting?
27
00:01:24,051 --> 00:01:26,129
You know the
Basement, don't you?
28
00:01:26,153 --> 00:01:28,320
The floor just above hell?
29
00:01:28,355 --> 00:01:30,922
Why is it rent free?
30
00:01:30,958 --> 00:01:34,259
Because we're going to be
The new súper intendents.
31
00:01:34,295 --> 00:01:36,528
I don't mind us living
In the basement.
32
00:01:36,564 --> 00:01:38,741
Oh, ashley, that is so nice.
33
00:01:38,765 --> 00:01:40,643
Tell her why that
Won't work, honey.
34
00:01:40,667 --> 00:01:43,268
Well, you see, it's only
A studio apartment,
35
00:01:43,304 --> 00:01:46,071
So there's not going to
Be enough room for you.
36
00:01:46,107 --> 00:01:48,407
See, sharon still
Hasn't found a job,
37
00:01:48,442 --> 00:01:52,010
And she's working through
This difficult period by shopping.
38
00:01:52,045 --> 00:01:53,790
Great. What am I going to do?
39
00:01:53,814 --> 00:01:56,181
I only have a month
To find an apartment.
40
00:01:56,217 --> 00:01:58,295
Actually, it has
To be this weekend,
41
00:01:58,319 --> 00:02:00,252
Otherwise they're going
To give the super's job
42
00:02:00,287 --> 00:02:02,031
To someone else and
We'll lose the basement.
43
00:02:02,055 --> 00:02:03,455
We couldn't have that.
44
00:02:03,491 --> 00:02:06,024
You know how we love
To look out the window
45
00:02:06,059 --> 00:02:11,930
And ankle-watch.
46
00:02:11,965 --> 00:02:15,245
"As long as big im open, let's
Take out a kidney. Big laughs".
47
00:02:17,638 --> 00:02:20,171
You know, there's a rumor
Going around the hospital
48
00:02:20,207 --> 00:02:21,218
That you and ashley
Have broken up.
49
00:02:21,242 --> 00:02:22,641
That's not so much a rumor
50
00:02:22,676 --> 00:02:26,745
As it is a flier I had
Printed up at kinko's.
51
00:02:26,780 --> 00:02:28,091
Maybe I could give you my number
52
00:02:28,115 --> 00:02:30,282
And we could go out sometime.
53
00:02:30,317 --> 00:02:31,861
We're from such
Different worlds,
54
00:02:31,885 --> 00:02:34,786
Me being a man,
You being a woman.
55
00:02:34,821 --> 00:02:37,221
Oh, what the hell?
Let them judge us.
56
00:02:39,092 --> 00:02:40,659
Ashley still lives here?
57
00:02:40,694 --> 00:02:43,194
Yeah, but she lives with
Different people now.
58
00:02:43,230 --> 00:02:45,230
Hi, berg. Hi.
59
00:02:45,266 --> 00:02:47,266
Gosh, is it wednesday already?
60
00:02:47,301 --> 00:02:49,701
He always brings a nurse
Home on wednesdays.
61
00:02:49,737 --> 00:02:51,303
He's so predictable.
62
00:02:51,338 --> 00:02:54,451
Don't listen to her. I
Hate you. You love me.
63
00:02:54,475 --> 00:02:56,708
Shut up, shut up, shut up.
64
00:02:59,079 --> 00:03:01,946
So I have a real
Feeling about us.
65
00:03:01,982 --> 00:03:04,516
Okay. Are you nuts?
66
00:03:04,551 --> 00:03:07,029
I've been trying to
Gether number for days.
67
00:03:07,053 --> 00:03:10,121
Don't you know that you
Are supposed to wait 21 days
68
00:03:10,157 --> 00:03:12,557
Before trolling around
For new phone numbers?
69
00:03:12,593 --> 00:03:14,937
Was that in the
April issue of sassy?
70
00:03:14,961 --> 00:03:16,740
'cause I didn't get that one.
71
00:03:16,764 --> 00:03:19,298
Thank you for making
It that much easier
72
00:03:19,333 --> 00:03:20,532
For me to get over you.
73
00:03:21,702 --> 00:03:23,246
Hey, you two snow leopards.
74
00:03:23,270 --> 00:03:25,682
You better get inside
Before you catch cold.
75
00:03:25,706 --> 00:03:27,717
That'd be a bad way to
Start the new minnellium.
76
00:03:27,741 --> 00:03:28,752
I mean millennium.
77
00:03:28,776 --> 00:03:29,741
Isn't that a hard word to say?
78
00:03:29,777 --> 00:03:31,176
It's like cimmanon.
79
00:03:31,211 --> 00:03:35,079
Oh, cheese and whiskers,
I've done it again.
80
00:03:35,115 --> 00:03:38,283
Okay, well, run
Along, little person.
81
00:03:38,319 --> 00:03:39,829
Okay. Okay.
82
00:03:39,853 --> 00:03:41,687
Not you.
83
00:03:44,291 --> 00:03:45,991
Knock, knock!
84
00:03:46,026 --> 00:03:47,892
Knockety-knock, knock.
85
00:03:49,363 --> 00:03:51,597
Ding-dong.
86
00:03:51,632 --> 00:03:58,135
Ding-dong... Dong-dong... Dong.
87
00:03:58,171 --> 00:03:59,838
I'm here!
88
00:03:59,873 --> 00:04:03,441
Okay, I was just
Walking by, and I thought,
89
00:04:03,476 --> 00:04:06,278
"Who do I know that
Would want to help me
90
00:04:06,313 --> 00:04:09,915
Put together my
Brand-new kitty hotel?"
91
00:04:09,950 --> 00:04:11,883
Who'd you come up with?
92
00:04:11,919 --> 00:04:16,354
You, you goose on the loose.
93
00:04:16,390 --> 00:04:18,368
You know what? I can't.
94
00:04:18,392 --> 00:04:19,991
Irene, I'm allergic to cats.
95
00:04:20,027 --> 00:04:21,526
Oh. That's too bad.
96
00:04:21,561 --> 00:04:23,795
Why don't you just
Read me the instructions
97
00:04:23,830 --> 00:04:25,297
From the hall?
98
00:04:25,332 --> 00:04:27,443
That sounds good,
But you know what?
99
00:04:27,467 --> 00:04:28,477
I'm dyslexic.
100
00:04:28,501 --> 00:04:30,668
I made rock candy.
101
00:04:30,703 --> 00:04:32,870
And I have adult diabetes.
102
00:04:32,906 --> 00:04:36,441
Peter dunville, are
You trying to avoid me?
103
00:04:36,476 --> 00:04:38,143
No. No, no, no.
104
00:04:38,178 --> 00:04:40,123
You couldn't be
Further from the truth...
105
00:04:40,147 --> 00:04:42,080
Baby ruth.
106
00:04:42,115 --> 00:04:44,849
Oh, pete, you're playing!
107
00:04:44,884 --> 00:04:46,051
Yay.
108
00:04:46,086 --> 00:04:47,785
Here are the instructions.
109
00:04:47,821 --> 00:04:50,655
I'll call you, and you can
Describe the pictures to me.
110
00:04:50,690 --> 00:04:52,601
Okay. I'll be waiting
For your call.
111
00:04:57,364 --> 00:05:00,131
At o'malley's.
112
00:05:00,167 --> 00:05:04,102
But... We're... Broken up.
113
00:05:04,137 --> 00:05:06,237
And of all the women at work,
114
00:05:06,273 --> 00:05:08,506
Why must it be
Nurse "Never say no"?
115
00:05:08,541 --> 00:05:10,208
For god's sake,
116
00:05:10,243 --> 00:05:12,455
You just answered
Your own question.
117
00:05:12,479 --> 00:05:14,279
Hey, ashley. Drop dead.
118
00:05:14,314 --> 00:05:16,414
Thank you very much.
119
00:05:16,450 --> 00:05:18,494
She came outside
While I was getting
120
00:05:18,518 --> 00:05:20,596
A nurse's phone
Number and then starts
121
00:05:20,620 --> 00:05:22,698
Throwing around some
Bogus post-dating rule.
122
00:05:22,722 --> 00:05:24,489
The 21-day waiting period?
123
00:05:24,524 --> 00:05:28,960
Is there some breakup
Newsletter I'm not getting?
124
00:05:31,198 --> 00:05:33,398
If you're looking
For pete dunville,
125
00:05:33,433 --> 00:05:34,866
He's not home.
126
00:05:34,901 --> 00:05:36,868
Well, at least he's not
Answering his phone.
127
00:05:36,903 --> 00:05:40,171
That's all right, lady. I
Just got a package for him.
128
00:05:40,207 --> 00:05:42,240
Say no more, deliveryman.
129
00:05:42,275 --> 00:05:45,576
I'll hold it here until
He has to come get it.
130
00:05:45,612 --> 00:05:47,078
Don't you worry.
131
00:05:47,114 --> 00:05:49,714
I didn't worry when I
Dropped it in the puddle.
132
00:05:49,749 --> 00:05:52,350
You think I'm going
To worry now?
133
00:05:54,687 --> 00:05:56,454
Hi, irene.
134
00:05:56,490 --> 00:05:59,557
You getting a little
Package there?
135
00:05:59,592 --> 00:06:01,993
No.
136
00:06:02,029 --> 00:06:03,594
I mean, yes.
137
00:06:03,630 --> 00:06:07,032
I said no, meant yes.
138
00:06:07,067 --> 00:06:09,627
Okay, well, good luck with that.
139
00:06:10,803 --> 00:06:12,404
Hey, irene.
140
00:06:12,439 --> 00:06:14,999
If there's a head in
That box, I'm telling.
141
00:06:17,044 --> 00:06:18,443
There's no way all this
142
00:06:18,478 --> 00:06:20,678
Is going to fit into
That studio apartment.
143
00:06:20,713 --> 00:06:22,480
Sharon, don't be so negative.
144
00:06:22,516 --> 00:06:24,082
Oh, I'm sorry.
145
00:06:24,117 --> 00:06:26,084
I don't mean to be negative,
146
00:06:26,119 --> 00:06:28,953
And then I remember
That I'm going to be living
147
00:06:28,988 --> 00:06:31,222
In a basement with a janitor!
148
00:06:31,258 --> 00:06:32,857
Okay, you know what?
149
00:06:32,892 --> 00:06:35,171
Everyone laughs
Until one of us makes it,
150
00:06:35,195 --> 00:06:36,594
Like schneider.
151
00:06:41,668 --> 00:06:43,435
Hey, guys, is ashley here?
152
00:06:43,470 --> 00:06:45,203
She's in her bedroom.
153
00:06:45,238 --> 00:06:47,439
You want to buy a toaster?
154
00:06:47,474 --> 00:06:49,640
I have a toaster.
155
00:06:49,676 --> 00:06:52,210
Yes, and to be honest with you,
156
00:06:52,245 --> 00:06:54,779
I've never been that
Impressed with it.
157
00:06:54,814 --> 00:06:57,848
This baby's a 4-slicer.
158
00:06:57,884 --> 00:07:00,585
Gee, I don't know. I
Do entertain a lot
159
00:07:00,620 --> 00:07:05,090
And my guests often ask
For four pieces of toast...
160
00:07:05,125 --> 00:07:07,158
Mmm, but no. Better not.
161
00:07:07,194 --> 00:07:09,994
Don't want to seem "Showy."
162
00:07:10,029 --> 00:07:12,175
Hey, berg. It's nice to see you.
163
00:07:12,199 --> 00:07:13,664
No, I don't mean that.
164
00:07:13,700 --> 00:07:17,268
I thought I could say
It with a straight face.
165
00:07:17,304 --> 00:07:19,170
Listen, ashley. Look.
166
00:07:19,206 --> 00:07:21,639
I've given what you
Said about dating
167
00:07:21,674 --> 00:07:23,941
A lot of consideration,
168
00:07:23,977 --> 00:07:26,444
And I've decided I'm
Completely right.
169
00:07:26,480 --> 00:07:29,180
Just thought you should
Know before you move.
170
00:07:29,216 --> 00:07:31,194
Well, that's very kind of you
171
00:07:31,218 --> 00:07:32,717
But I'm not moving.
172
00:07:32,752 --> 00:07:34,018
What?
173
00:07:34,053 --> 00:07:36,199
I talked to the building owner,
174
00:07:36,223 --> 00:07:39,690
And he has agreed to let
Me sublet the apartment
175
00:07:39,726 --> 00:07:43,561
So as always, berg,
You will be beneath me.
176
00:07:46,799 --> 00:07:49,767
Sharon, would you please
Go get my box from irene?
177
00:07:49,802 --> 00:07:53,304
I am living in a basement!
178
00:07:56,075 --> 00:07:57,675
Johnny, please?
179
00:07:57,710 --> 00:07:59,910
My dad told me never to mess
With another man's stalker.
180
00:08:02,715 --> 00:08:05,316
Berg.
181
00:08:06,919 --> 00:08:10,388
Why don't you just goask
Her for the package?
182
00:08:10,423 --> 00:08:12,657
She always takes
It the wrong way.
183
00:08:12,692 --> 00:08:14,925
Last week I held the
Door open for her,
184
00:08:14,961 --> 00:08:16,339
She named three of
Her cats after me...
185
00:08:16,363 --> 00:08:19,096
Pete, petey, and pedro.
186
00:08:19,132 --> 00:08:21,544
You know what? Let's be honest.
187
00:08:21,568 --> 00:08:23,100
Look, she wants me.
188
00:08:23,136 --> 00:08:27,372
Damn this ricky martin face!
189
00:08:27,407 --> 00:08:29,607
I'll get the package.
190
00:08:29,643 --> 00:08:31,454
Whoa, berg. We're
Just about to take
191
00:08:31,478 --> 00:08:32,977
All this stuff downstairs.
192
00:08:33,012 --> 00:08:34,492
And my friend's
Without a package.
193
00:08:48,728 --> 00:08:51,429
Oh, hi, berg. Come on in.
194
00:08:51,464 --> 00:08:55,099
Thanks, but I can't.
Pete's allergic to cats.
195
00:08:55,134 --> 00:08:56,568
Yeah, me, too.
196
00:08:56,603 --> 00:08:59,504
I take lots of pills, though.
197
00:08:59,539 --> 00:09:04,141
Yeah... I figured.
198
00:09:04,177 --> 00:09:07,579
Listen, I really need to
Getthat package for pete.
199
00:09:07,614 --> 00:09:10,915
Bum-bum, get down!
200
00:09:10,950 --> 00:09:13,351
Can you believe him?
I build him a hotel,
201
00:09:13,386 --> 00:09:16,421
And all he wants to do
Is hang from the curtains.
202
00:09:16,456 --> 00:09:21,226
Oh, he's probably just trying
To signal outside for help.
203
00:09:21,261 --> 00:09:23,127
Anyway, the package?
204
00:09:23,162 --> 00:09:26,564
Oh, no can do, 6'2".
205
00:09:26,600 --> 00:09:30,167
The deliveryman said
To only give it to pete,
206
00:09:30,203 --> 00:09:32,803
And you're not pete, are you?
207
00:09:34,207 --> 00:09:37,308
Mr. Jeebers, no! Get off her!
208
00:09:37,344 --> 00:09:39,510
Honestly, he's insatiable.
209
00:09:41,147 --> 00:09:45,149
Run, just run.
210
00:09:57,997 --> 00:09:59,497
Careful.
211
00:10:02,602 --> 00:10:04,980
Hey, you didn't get
My package from irene.
212
00:10:05,004 --> 00:10:06,537
Well, I tried,
213
00:10:06,573 --> 00:10:08,473
But it's behind the
Concierge desk
214
00:10:08,508 --> 00:10:09,940
At the kitty hotel.
215
00:10:12,345 --> 00:10:14,022
Hey, ash, what's going on
216
00:10:14,046 --> 00:10:16,213
I am moving into
My new apartment.
217
00:10:16,249 --> 00:10:18,616
Just got all of my
Stuff out of storage.
218
00:10:18,652 --> 00:10:21,653
Apparently, you stored
Him next to your ab-roller.
219
00:10:21,688 --> 00:10:24,489
Oh, wait, wait,
Wait. Stop the move.
220
00:10:24,524 --> 00:10:27,224
Put everything back.
221
00:10:27,260 --> 00:10:28,660
I was packing your files,
222
00:10:28,695 --> 00:10:30,735
And I found this bank statement.
223
00:10:30,764 --> 00:10:32,841
You got $23,000
In a mutual fund.
224
00:10:32,865 --> 00:10:35,010
Sharon, that's my life savings.
225
00:10:35,034 --> 00:10:36,967
Yeah, and it's saving our lives.
226
00:10:37,003 --> 00:10:39,604
We're staying upstairs.
227
00:10:39,639 --> 00:10:41,417
No, we're not. We're
Moving downstairs.
228
00:10:41,441 --> 00:10:43,174
Baby, our room's
Still available.
229
00:10:43,209 --> 00:10:44,875
Ooh, actually, it's not.
230
00:10:44,911 --> 00:10:47,278
Victor's not only
Helping me move,
231
00:10:47,314 --> 00:10:49,280
He's also my new roommate.
232
00:10:49,316 --> 00:10:51,316
Victor: aloha, neighbors.
233
00:10:53,152 --> 00:10:54,819
Her roommate?
234
00:10:54,854 --> 00:10:57,266
Did you see the
Size of that guy?
235
00:10:57,290 --> 00:10:59,450
I bet he can get my
Package from irene.
236
00:11:13,973 --> 00:11:16,240
Can you believe ashley?
237
00:11:16,276 --> 00:11:17,286
I mean, why don't ijust
Move a supermodel
238
00:11:17,310 --> 00:11:18,421
Into my apartment?
239
00:11:18,445 --> 00:11:20,879
I think the answer
To that question
240
00:11:20,914 --> 00:11:22,881
Would only hurt your feelings.
241
00:11:22,916 --> 00:11:25,395
Could you guys
Excuse us, please?
242
00:11:25,419 --> 00:11:26,818
I'm going to kill johnny
243
00:11:26,853 --> 00:11:29,421
And I don't want any witnesses.
244
00:11:29,456 --> 00:11:32,189
I'm going to go up
And talk to ashley.
245
00:11:32,225 --> 00:11:33,691
If victor has a problem...
246
00:11:33,727 --> 00:11:35,993
What are you going to do?
247
00:11:36,029 --> 00:11:39,731
Hey, you don't think he'll
Have a problem, do you?
248
00:11:39,766 --> 00:11:41,065
I can't believe you.
249
00:11:41,100 --> 00:11:43,345
We have $23,000, and
We're moving here.
250
00:11:43,369 --> 00:11:45,737
Come on, this is
Great. Look at this. Hey.
251
00:11:45,772 --> 00:11:49,240
Huh? We got a murphy bed.
252
00:11:51,311 --> 00:11:53,177
And there's the bathroom.
253
00:11:53,212 --> 00:11:55,480
Wow. This is great.
254
00:11:55,515 --> 00:11:57,181
And look at the toilet.
255
00:11:57,216 --> 00:11:59,094
It's like a
Littlepatio fountain.
256
00:11:59,118 --> 00:12:00,718
We agreed to live down here.
257
00:12:00,754 --> 00:12:02,420
Yeah, but that was before
258
00:12:02,456 --> 00:12:04,366
I found your file
Marked "I'm rich."
259
00:12:04,390 --> 00:12:06,591
For the last six months,
260
00:12:06,626 --> 00:12:08,604
I have been paying the
Billsin our apartment.
261
00:12:08,628 --> 00:12:10,361
I wanted to help.
You wouldn't let me.
262
00:12:10,396 --> 00:12:12,374
I was making a lot of money,
263
00:12:12,398 --> 00:12:14,477
And now I'm not,
You have the money,
264
00:12:14,501 --> 00:12:15,967
So why won't you pay?
265
00:12:16,002 --> 00:12:17,680
I've been saving that
Money my entire life.
266
00:12:17,704 --> 00:12:19,103
That is my nest egg.
267
00:12:19,138 --> 00:12:22,106
So you have it when
You need it, like now.
268
00:12:22,141 --> 00:12:24,342
We have a place to stay.
269
00:12:24,377 --> 00:12:25,743
So do convicts,
270
00:12:25,779 --> 00:12:28,245
But if they had 23,000 smokes,
271
00:12:28,281 --> 00:12:30,047
They'd buy their way out.
272
00:12:30,083 --> 00:12:32,495
You know what, johnny?
You just stay here
273
00:12:32,519 --> 00:12:35,079
Because I am moving
Back upstairs.
274
00:12:42,261 --> 00:12:46,931
Oh, oh, god, yes. That's
Wonderful, victor.
275
00:12:46,967 --> 00:12:50,034
You know, my old boyfriend
Used to give me massages,
276
00:12:50,069 --> 00:12:52,036
But I could barely feel them.
277
00:12:52,071 --> 00:12:54,416
He was so weak and scrawny.
278
00:12:54,440 --> 00:12:57,141
Oh, hello, fellas.
279
00:12:57,176 --> 00:13:00,244
I think you know
My new roommate...
280
00:13:00,279 --> 00:13:05,216
Professional masseur
Victor, soother of muscles.
281
00:13:05,251 --> 00:13:08,019
Hi. Michael bergen,
Doctor of medicine.
282
00:13:08,054 --> 00:13:12,156
Hi. Pete dunville,
Seller of makeup.
283
00:13:12,191 --> 00:13:13,825
I have a package downstairs.
284
00:13:13,860 --> 00:13:17,662
It might be from my mom
Or it could be a prize.
285
00:13:17,697 --> 00:13:19,664
I enter a lot of contests.
286
00:13:19,699 --> 00:13:21,465
Not now.
287
00:13:21,501 --> 00:13:25,703
Ashley, can I have a moment
Alone with you, please?
288
00:13:25,739 --> 00:13:27,550
You can say anything
In front of victor.
289
00:13:27,574 --> 00:13:28,973
Okay, fine.
290
00:13:29,009 --> 00:13:31,910
Look, you're letting a
Guy who looks like that...
291
00:13:31,945 --> 00:13:35,346
And by that, I mean average...
292
00:13:35,381 --> 00:13:38,315
Move into your
Apartment and rub you?
293
00:13:38,351 --> 00:13:39,316
Is this about me?
294
00:13:39,352 --> 00:13:40,552
No, victor.
295
00:13:40,587 --> 00:13:43,955
You're not my
Boyfriend any more.
296
00:13:43,990 --> 00:13:46,658
I think somebody's
Forgetting the 21-day rule.
297
00:13:46,693 --> 00:13:49,928
I'm not dating victor.
It's perfectly legitimate.
298
00:13:49,963 --> 00:13:52,664
Oh, god, yes, that's the stuff.
299
00:13:52,699 --> 00:13:55,033
You know, it's been nothing
But trouble around here
300
00:13:55,068 --> 00:13:56,601
Since victor moved in.
301
00:13:56,636 --> 00:13:57,902
I think this is about me.
302
00:13:57,938 --> 00:13:58,970
This is not about you!
303
00:13:59,005 --> 00:14:03,007
The world does not
Revolve around victor!
304
00:14:03,043 --> 00:14:04,341
Berg, what I did was no worse
305
00:14:04,377 --> 00:14:07,812
Than you dating every
Chippy in a white dress.
306
00:14:07,847 --> 00:14:10,448
She was only giving
Me her phone number.
307
00:14:10,483 --> 00:14:13,217
There's too much tension
Here, and I should know.
308
00:14:13,252 --> 00:14:15,319
I'm in the tension business.
309
00:14:15,354 --> 00:14:17,789
Ashley, this isn't
Going to work for me.
310
00:14:17,824 --> 00:14:20,357
I can't be your roommate.
311
00:14:20,393 --> 00:14:24,161
And you, you're
Lucky I'm a healer.
312
00:14:24,197 --> 00:14:26,263
Well, thanks a lot, berg.
313
00:14:26,299 --> 00:14:28,744
Now not only did I
Lose my new roommate,
314
00:14:28,768 --> 00:14:30,702
But I also lost the guy
315
00:14:30,737 --> 00:14:32,971
Who was going to move my stuff.
316
00:14:33,006 --> 00:14:35,707
I'm so sorry for you, ashley.
317
00:14:39,846 --> 00:14:43,114
Yeah, sorry for you, ashley.
318
00:14:43,149 --> 00:14:45,750
Hey, as long as you're not busy,
319
00:14:45,785 --> 00:14:48,753
You mind bringing up
The rest of my furniture?
320
00:14:48,788 --> 00:14:50,688
No. No way, ashley.
You know what?
321
00:14:50,724 --> 00:14:52,523
You may be able
To manipulate berg,
322
00:14:52,558 --> 00:14:53,758
But not me.
323
00:14:53,793 --> 00:14:55,292
I'll get your package.
324
00:14:55,328 --> 00:14:56,861
I'll start with the dishes.
325
00:15:06,673 --> 00:15:08,172
Oh, hi, ashley.
326
00:15:08,207 --> 00:15:10,767
All right, listen up, freak.
327
00:15:13,179 --> 00:15:15,379
I want pete's package.
328
00:15:15,414 --> 00:15:17,214
I'm not afraid of you.
329
00:15:17,250 --> 00:15:19,128
Well, maybe your cats are.
330
00:15:19,152 --> 00:15:20,618
Okay, here's the deal.
331
00:15:20,654 --> 00:15:23,198
For every day pete
Doesn't have his package,
332
00:15:23,222 --> 00:15:25,322
You lose one cat.
333
00:15:25,358 --> 00:15:28,192
Is that cat wearing
A bathing suit?
334
00:15:37,837 --> 00:15:40,337
Sharon here?
335
00:15:40,373 --> 00:15:42,918
Yes. She has locked
Herself in victor's bedroom.
336
00:15:42,942 --> 00:15:45,743
Sharon: it's my bedroom!
337
00:15:45,779 --> 00:15:48,680
Sharon, come out.
You can't stay here.
338
00:15:48,715 --> 00:15:51,115
We live downstairs now.
339
00:15:51,151 --> 00:15:53,818
Sharon!
340
00:15:53,853 --> 00:15:56,198
I'm not leaving.I
Hate it down there.
341
00:15:56,222 --> 00:15:58,134
It's moldy and
Darkand depressing.
342
00:15:58,158 --> 00:16:01,625
If we have the money,
Why can't we live here?
343
00:16:01,661 --> 00:16:03,360
Because I want a house!
344
00:16:03,396 --> 00:16:06,130
You know, I want us and our kids
345
00:16:06,166 --> 00:16:09,200
To have some security.
346
00:16:09,235 --> 00:16:12,136
You know, a future
Where we're not dying
347
00:16:12,172 --> 00:16:14,138
To make our bills every month
348
00:16:14,174 --> 00:16:17,942
Like we are now,
Like my folks had to.
349
00:16:21,815 --> 00:16:25,149
So if it means
Living in a basement
350
00:16:25,185 --> 00:16:27,651
And being a janitor
In the present,
351
00:16:27,687 --> 00:16:29,520
You know, so be it.
352
00:16:29,555 --> 00:16:32,023
It may not be good
Enough for you,
353
00:16:32,058 --> 00:16:34,726
But it sure is for me.
354
00:16:34,761 --> 00:16:37,228
So if you'll excuse me,
355
00:16:37,263 --> 00:16:40,664
I have to go grab my squeegee.
356
00:16:40,700 --> 00:16:42,666
A dog peed on our window,
357
00:16:42,702 --> 00:16:45,302
And I will not live like that.
358
00:16:47,406 --> 00:16:49,707
She's all yours.
359
00:16:51,277 --> 00:16:54,678
Pete, will you watch
Where you're going?
360
00:16:54,714 --> 00:16:56,214
Hey, is there any reason
361
00:16:56,249 --> 00:16:58,816
That I'm the only
One not moving,
362
00:16:58,852 --> 00:17:00,651
Yet I'm the only one moving!
363
00:17:04,657 --> 00:17:06,991
All right, that is the last box.
364
00:17:07,026 --> 00:17:10,461
Now I want my package, ashley.
365
00:17:10,496 --> 00:17:12,696
And I want my mattress, pete.
366
00:17:12,732 --> 00:17:14,766
Hmm, what will we do?
367
00:17:14,801 --> 00:17:16,600
Forget it. I'm not your puppet.
368
00:17:16,636 --> 00:17:18,814
Fine, if you don't
Want your prize.
369
00:17:18,838 --> 00:17:20,872
Is it a prize?
370
00:17:20,907 --> 00:17:23,707
What did you hear?
371
00:17:23,743 --> 00:17:26,710
I hear the pitter-patter
Of your little feet
372
00:17:26,746 --> 00:17:29,306
Bringing my mattress upstairs.
373
00:17:44,097 --> 00:17:47,064
Berg, could you at
Least get the door?
374
00:17:47,100 --> 00:17:49,901
Whoa. Sure, buddy.
375
00:17:49,936 --> 00:17:53,204
Oh, boy, I'm totally going
To feel that tomorrow.
376
00:17:55,574 --> 00:17:57,675
Get out of my way.
377
00:17:57,710 --> 00:17:59,588
I'm sensing a
Little tension here,
378
00:17:59,612 --> 00:18:02,313
But then again,
What would I know?
379
00:18:02,348 --> 00:18:04,393
I'm not in the tension business.
380
00:18:04,417 --> 00:18:06,617
Look, berg, until I
Find a new roommate,
381
00:18:06,652 --> 00:18:08,719
You are paying half my rent.
382
00:18:08,754 --> 00:18:11,322
Fine. Until I find a new date,
383
00:18:11,357 --> 00:18:14,458
You're paying for
Half of my... Cable.
384
00:18:14,493 --> 00:18:15,960
You are so petty.
385
00:18:15,995 --> 00:18:17,594
You deliberately
Scared victor off
386
00:18:17,630 --> 00:18:19,496
To get back at
Me for that nurse.
387
00:18:19,532 --> 00:18:21,877
That's right. I
Knew I had a reason.
388
00:18:21,901 --> 00:18:23,312
Well, congratulations.
Now I'm miserable.
389
00:18:23,336 --> 00:18:25,536
Is that what you wanted?
390
00:18:25,571 --> 00:18:28,940
I'd like you to be
As miserable as I am.
391
00:18:28,975 --> 00:18:30,752
Yes, just like you.
You're miserable?
392
00:18:30,776 --> 00:18:32,210
Hmm. Well, I was,
393
00:18:32,245 --> 00:18:34,578
But now that I know
You're miserable,
394
00:18:34,613 --> 00:18:36,247
I'm happy.
395
00:18:36,282 --> 00:18:38,093
Well, I'm happy
That you're happy,
396
00:18:38,117 --> 00:18:40,462
So that must make you
Pretty damn miserable,
397
00:18:40,486 --> 00:18:42,653
So, ha! I win! Hoo-ah!
398
00:18:42,688 --> 00:18:44,889
I am so miserable.
399
00:18:44,924 --> 00:18:48,159
I am so happy.
400
00:18:48,194 --> 00:18:50,294
Look, I found it.
401
00:18:50,330 --> 00:18:53,764
And now I'm going to open it.
402
00:18:57,203 --> 00:18:58,669
Oh, it's a membership
403
00:18:58,704 --> 00:19:01,305
To the fruit of the month club.
404
00:19:05,644 --> 00:19:09,113
"Apricots, grapes,
Mangos, and more,
405
00:19:09,148 --> 00:19:11,182
"My way to say thank you
406
00:19:11,217 --> 00:19:15,019
For holding the
Door. Love, irene."
407
00:19:15,054 --> 00:19:19,323
Fruits from a nut
It's kind of clever.
408
00:19:27,233 --> 00:19:30,334
It's like the best
Fort I ever had.
409
00:19:33,472 --> 00:19:35,273
Hi.
410
00:19:35,308 --> 00:19:38,309
Hi.
411
00:19:38,344 --> 00:19:40,155
Thought about what you said.
412
00:19:40,179 --> 00:19:43,180
You know that house
You want to buy?
413
00:19:43,216 --> 00:19:45,950
Well, I want to
Live there with you.
414
00:19:45,985 --> 00:19:49,220
So if it means living
Like a couple of bats
415
00:19:49,255 --> 00:19:52,890
In a cave in new mexico...
416
00:19:52,926 --> 00:19:55,226
Then I'm all for it.
417
00:19:55,261 --> 00:19:56,860
Terrific.
418
00:19:56,896 --> 00:19:59,375
Of course, I've never
Lived in squalor,
419
00:19:59,399 --> 00:20:01,710
So, um, I'm sure I'll resent it,
420
00:20:01,734 --> 00:20:03,678
And consequently
You'regoing to have to pay
421
00:20:03,702 --> 00:20:05,547
In a thousand small ways.
422
00:20:05,571 --> 00:20:06,904
Not unexpected.
423
00:20:06,940 --> 00:20:09,084
And every time I'm
Losing an argument,
424
00:20:09,108 --> 00:20:11,620
I'm going to have to
Throw the basement back
425
00:20:11,644 --> 00:20:12,922
In your face.
426
00:20:12,946 --> 00:20:16,713
When was the last time
You lost an argument?
427
00:20:18,918 --> 00:20:21,252
So, you're going to stay?
428
00:20:21,287 --> 00:20:23,554
Yeah.
429
00:20:23,589 --> 00:20:26,824
Good.
430
00:20:26,859 --> 00:20:28,125
Now let's go.
431
00:20:28,161 --> 00:20:29,526
Where?
432
00:20:29,562 --> 00:20:31,706
I'm taking you outto
A lobster dinner.
433
00:20:31,730 --> 00:20:33,664
Ooh, sounds kind of pricey.
434
00:20:33,699 --> 00:20:35,732
Well, I love you...
435
00:20:35,768 --> 00:20:38,735
And you can't have an appetizer.
436
00:20:42,875 --> 00:20:45,843
Uh, mr. Superintendent.
437
00:20:58,090 --> 00:20:59,456
Oh, hi, pete.
438
00:20:59,491 --> 00:21:02,393
Listen, irene, I just
Wanted to say thank you
439
00:21:02,428 --> 00:21:04,439
For the fruit. You
Really shouldn't have.
440
00:21:04,463 --> 00:21:06,430
Oh, goody. What
Did you get first?
441
00:21:06,465 --> 00:21:07,642
Um, apricots.
442
00:21:07,666 --> 00:21:08,999
Apricots! Yay!
443
00:21:09,035 --> 00:21:11,535
Mr. Bumpy said it
Would be apricots.
444
00:21:11,570 --> 00:21:13,270
Do you want to come in?
445
00:21:13,306 --> 00:21:16,206
I was just about
To give him his bath.
446
00:21:16,242 --> 00:21:19,476
That doesn't mean you
Lick him, does it, irene?
447
00:21:19,511 --> 00:21:21,912
No, silly.
448
00:21:21,948 --> 00:21:24,026
No. Maybe some other
Time, but thanks again.
449
00:21:24,050 --> 00:21:25,582
No, it was my pleasure.
450
00:21:27,053 --> 00:21:28,953
Oh, mr. Jeebers,
For the last time,
451
00:21:28,988 --> 00:21:31,488
She is a ferret!
31782
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