Original subtitles

(bell rings)

♪ When I wake up in the morning and the alarm gives out a warning ♪

♪ I don't think I'll ever make it on time ♪

♪ By the time I grab my books and I give myself a look ♪

♪ I'm at the corner just in time to see the bus fly by ♪

♪ It's all right ♪

♪ 'Cause I'm saved by the bell ♪

♪ If the teacher pops a test I know I'm in a mess ♪

♪ And my dog ate all my homework last night ♪

♪ Ridin' low on my chair, she won't know that I'm there ♪

♪ If I can hand it in tomorrow it will be all right ♪

♪ It's all right ♪

♪ 'Cause I'm saved by the bell... ♪

♪ It's all right, 'cause I'm saved by the-- ♪

♪ It's all right, 'cause I'm saved by the-- ♪

♪ It's all right, 'cause I'm saved by the bell ♪

(doorbell rings)

(doorbell rings)

Coming.

Hey, Screech. I cannot believe your parents

are really leaving us with the house for four days.

It's a dream come true.

Really? I usually dream that I'm on "Gilligan's Island"...

surrounded by beautiful girls, but none of them talk to me.

Let me tell you, that's not a dream, that's your life.

(horn honking)

Mom, hurry up! Dad's freaking out!

Woman: I'm coming!

Oh, oh! Zachary, be careful with the King!

Elvis is not a toy.

I'd just die if anything happened to it.

Mrs. Powers, I hope you and Mr. Powers

have a wonderful anniversary at Graceland.

- Where are you staying? - Heartbreak Hotel.

Where else?

Don't worry about a thing. Just enjoy yourself.

Thank you, Zachary.

I'm just so glad my Samuel has a friend as trustworthy as you.

Thank you.

Well, bye, Mom. Don't forget my Elvis slippers, size 11.

My little man is all grown up.

(horn honking)

I almost forgot! Hound Dog.

(whistles)

Mommy almost left without saying goodbye.

Now, I want you boys to have fun.

Oh yeah, one more thing --

here are a few little house rules.

All right.

But rule 136 says no girls.

Rule 137 says no party.

- Screech-- - Just leave him alone.

So we can't have a party, big deal. But we can still have some fun.

We'll do, you know, guy stuff.

Yeah, it'll be great!

We'll rip phone books in two, and burp as loud as we want!

There you go, Screech!

Hi, guys. Let's all go to the movies tonight.

Sorry, girls. It's guys' night in.

Yup, men doing men things.

And no-ooo babes!

Well, excu-use us.

Oh no, guys, Violet just waved at me!

- What do I do?! - Hey, here she comes.

Stop drooling, you don't want her to slip.

Hi, Samuel.

I really enjoyed your presentation in biology yesterday.

Well, I've always loved the mating habits of worms.

Goodness gracious, Samuel!

Are you all right there?

Violet Ann Bickerstaff!

Hi, Maxwell. I was just --

I buy this you gold-plated pocket protector

and I find you conversing with another man?

Screech, I think Violet has the hots for you.

Why would she want me?

She's dating the richest, most powerful dork at Bayside.

And the biggest creep, the way he treats her.

- Yeah. - Just remember you're my squaw,

and that means you don't talk to any hunk but me, huh?

Gee, if she were my girl, I'd let her talk

to any geek she wanted to.

All right, Maxwell, you listen and you listen good.

Violet is a woman

and deserves to be treated with respect.

I know exactly what you need.

You tell him, honey.

Guess what?

Violet broke up with Maxwell.

Yeah, I just dumped the dweeb.

I was tired of being treated as a nerd ornament.

Well, good for you. You deserve someone better.

Someone like-- hey, what about Screech?

You mean, Samuel Powers?

Oh, he's so dreamy.

But why would he want me? He could have any girl he wants.

We have just entered "The Twilight Zone."

Violet, why don't you come to the movies with us?

Yeah, and if we hurry, we can all catch the 8:00 show.

I'd rather find out what Zack, Screech, and Slater are up to.

They said they were gonna do men things,

whatever that means.

My brothers see who can burp the loudest.

My youngest brother can say his full name,

Kenny Leonard Kapowski, in one burp.

(snorting)

You know, I'd love to know what guys do when we're not around.

You mean, besides talking about babes?

Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

(lip-synching) ♪ Ba-Ba-Ba, Ba-Barbara Ann ♪

Both: ♪ Ba-Ba-Ba, Ba-Barbara Ann ♪

♪ Ba-Ba-Ba, Ba-Barbara Ann ♪

♪ Barbara Ann ♪

♪ Oh, take my hand ♪

♪ Barbara Ann... ♪

♪ You got me rocking and rolling, rocking and reeling ♪

♪ Barbara Ann, Ba-Ba-Ba, Ba-Barbara Ann ♪

♪ You got me rocking and rolling, rocking and reeling ♪

♪ Barbara Ann Ba-Ba-Ba, Ba-Barbara Ann! ♪

(cheering)

- What are you guys doing here? - Watching you dance, bubba.

Come on, you guys got to get out of here.

Hi, Samuel. I really loved your dancing.

Yes, we loved how you all moved.

- Oh, yes. - Right, girls?

- ♪ Ba-Ba-Ba, Ba-Barbara Ann ♪ - Screech: Come on, watch out.

♪ Ba-Ba-Ba, Ba-Barbara Ann... ♪

Looks like the King is dead...

- (guitar strums) - ...again.

Hey, come on, Screech, wake up.

Come on, Screech, it's just a stupid Elvis statue.

- How important could that be? - Lisa, you don't understand.

My mom said she'd die if anything ever happened to it.

- Hello, Samuel. - Mom, you're back.

So, what's different about you? Did you shave your eyebrows?

I told you I'd die if anything happened to my Elvis statue.

When the King hit the floor, I bit the big one.

It was an accident, Mom. I'm sorry.

I forgive you, Samuel.

But now your gonna have to apologize to him.

Thank you. Thank you very much.

Is this the boy who got you all shook up, uh-huh?

Now, Elvis, don't be cruel.

I forgive you, little fella,

but the damage is already done.

We gotta be going now, Roberta.

I'm giving a concert for my mama at the Pearly Gates.

I'm singing live, if you'll pardon the expression.

Both: Uh-huh.

Goodbye, Samuel. And say goodbye to Hound Dog.

I'm sorry, Mom.

It was an accident.

- It was an accident. - Screech, come on, don't worry.

- We'll get another statue. - Yeah, right.

Where are we gonna buy another one before my mom gets home?

Honey, if it's for sale, I'll find it.

Samuel, I'm truly sorry about last night,

and I'll understand if you never want to speak to me again.

It wasn't your fault, Violet.

That's so sweet of you!

(snorting)

You're not like Maxwell at all.

I'm so glad we broke up.

You broke up?!

I mean, gee, too bad.

Lisa's the name, shopping's the game.

- Please, no applause. - She found the Elvis statue!

Great! Where is it?

Still in the store. It costs 250 bucks.

Where are we gonna get $250?

We need to find somebody rich and quick.

Violet Ann Bickerstaff!

Snap all you want, Maxwell. I-- I am no longer your possession.

You blew it, babe. Don't try crawling back.

Ohh! I wish someone would teach him a lesson.

We're gonna teach him a lesson, all right.

A $250 lesson.

Ladies and gentlemen,

the name of the game is Five-card Stud.

Some say they named it after me.

Hey, Maxwell, are you sure you've never played poker before?

Well, maybe once or twice with my mommy.

Full house,

read 'em and weep.

What?

You're too hot, Nerdstrom. I'm out.

Me, too.

Well, here's a buck, babe, just for being beautiful.

And here's a dirty look just for being alive.

(Hound Dog barks)

Sounds like Hound Dog wants to come in.

I'll go with you, I love animals.

Obviously.

Zack, you can stop letting him win now.

Who's letting him win?

Why don't you just give him your money?

Yeah, it'd be a lot quicker.

All: Ohhh.

- I'll bet 10 bucks, Maxwell. - But that's all the money you have.

Hey, hey, hey.

There we go.

I'll see your 10,

and raise you 50.

Guys, I need something worth 50 bucks.

He's almost as cute as you are.

They say owners resemble their dogs.

Why don't you bet the mutt, Morris?

- He can't bet Hound Dog! - Screech, it's a sure thing.

He can't lose.

Are you guys sure?

- Okay, Zack. Do it. - Okay, Nerdstrom,

but the dog is worth more than 50 bucks.

I'll bet him against all your chips.

But there's over $250 in here.

What's the matter, chicken?

(clucking)

I'm in. What do you have?

- Beat four queens, Maxwell. - Four ladies, right on.

Wow, four queens. That's the best hand we've had all night...

- Thank you, thank you, thank you. - ...until now.

Four kings.

- What? - What?

So long, suckers.

Screech. Screech, I'm sorry.

Screech, are you all right?

No! You lost Hound Dog!

- It wasn't my fault. - Hey, Screech.

It wasn't your fault? Yeah, right!

And maybe liver tastes good, huh?

- My mom's gonna kill me. - (phone rings)

Yeah, what? Oh...

Mom! Hi.

Samuel, is everything okay?

No! I mean, yes.

Good. Let me say hi to Hound Dog.

She wants to say hi to Hound Dog. What do I do?

- Give me the phone. - What?

(howls)

There's my Hound Dog. Mommy misses you.

Do you miss Mommy?

(howls)

Oh, good. Now put your big brother back on.

(howls) Okay.

- So how's your trip, Mom? - Oh, wonderful.

And what makes it even better

is knowing I can trust you with the house.

We're so proud. Love you tender! (kisses)

She said she was proud of me. I really messed up.

Don't worry, you're not alone.

You're right. I never could have messed up this much alone.

That does it.

Nerdstrom's gonna regret the day he met Zack Morris.

Most of us already do.

- No, Slater, don't do it! - I'm gonna break him in two, Zack.

He took my buddy Screech's dog.

No, Slater. He won the dog fair and square.

Besides, you can get suspended for breaking a nerd.

I don't care what they do to me.

Nerdstrom, listen to me -- you better get me that dog, or else.

Get away from me, or you'll be sorry.

- (alarm blaring) - Bully alert! Bully alert!

It's the latest thing in dweeb defense.

Belding!

Hey, hey, hey. What is going on here?

Nothing, sir. Maxwell's nerd alarm--

Went off by accident. It's sensitive.

That's not what it looks like to me.

Maxwell, are these two harassing you?

Don't be afraid to speak out, son. I'm here to protect geeks--

guys like you.

These fine lads were telling the truth, sir.

- Thanks for helping, fellas. - No problem.

Well, okay, if you say so. (laughs)

Just remember, I'm gonna be watching you guys.

Okay, Maxwell, why didn't you turn us in?

There's something I want more than that mangy mutt.

How about a lifetime pass to the Hollywood Earwax Museum?

Tempting,

but I'd rather swap the dog for a date with Legs.

- The dog for Jessie? - Hey, wait a second,

she is not gonna like this, Preppie.

Yeah, she's gonna hate this.

Both: Let's do it.

Face it. If we don't get another statue, Screech is dead.

See? It's not so bad.

Well, there's only one thing to do.

We'll just have a party.

Only you would think of having a party at a time like this.

And only I would charge ten bucks a head to get in.

Brilliant idea, Preppie.

Kelly, Lisa, go spread the word. Screech's house, 7:00.

We'll have the cheerleading squad to help.

♪ P-A-R-T-Y... at Screech's! ♪

Girl, you have got to get a life.

What can I do?

Well, you can help us figure out how to get Screech's dog back.

I'll do anything to help.

That's good, because Nerdstrom said he'd give the dog back if...

you go on a date with him.

And you told him no, right?

Right?!

Come on, Jessie, look, all you have to do

is show up with him at the party.

And once we get the dog back, you can just ditch him.

Oh, no, no, no, I refuse to go out with that postnasal drip.

Okay, but you can tell Screech he'll never see his dog again.

Hey, Screech, can we get you anything?

A Coke, some fries...

a hot dog?

Dog?! (sobbing)

So what if they've had him since he was a cuddly puppy.

Puppy!

All right, one date.

But Nerdstrom better keep his paws to himself.

Paws!

Hey, guys, how's the Save Screech's Tushie Fund coming?

Great. We almost have enough for the statue.

Right on.

Hey, buds. Righteous shindig.

Just get the dog so I can lose Mr. Toxic Waste.

Hey, we had a deal, where's the dog?

(scoffs) I'm no fool.

If I give you the dog now, then Spano splits.

So one of my buddies is keeping the canine company

until I give him the signal.

Come along, my tall treasure. Let's "rocka till we droppa."

Hey, I hear once you go geek, you never go back.

All right.

What a cute couple it is.

Zack, we did it! We have enough money to get the statue!

All right! Go!

Help me!

Save me!

Poor Jessie. Maybe we should help her out.

Yeah, one of us should go over there

and dance with Nerdstrom.

- Go ahead. - Oh no, you go.

You're a much better dancer.

Bag it. We'll buy her lunch tomorrow.

- Yeah. - All right, Nerdstrom, it's 10:00.

- Where's the dog? - I'm a man of my word, Morris.

However, a date officially ends with a goodnight kiss.

Yeah? Then kiss yourself and go home.

Hound Dog, you're back!

Come on, baby, where's my kiss?

Well, all right, Nerdstrom.

It's only fair.

- (low) What? - Close your eyes and pucker up.

What a woman!

Now I know what I've been missing with lame lips here.

You can't talk to my girl like that, you squid!

You didn't even kiss Jessie, you kissed my dog!

- Now get out of my house! - (spits)

Oh, Sammy, you're such a stud muffin.

I didn't know I was your girl.

Neither did I. Would you like to be?

Oh, I thought you'd never ask.

Wait.

Forget the rules!

Screech, when are your parents supposed to be home?

- Sunday. Why? - Because... they're here!

(everyone shouting)

What are we going to do? The party,

and Slater's not back yet!

Hey, hey, hey! Be cool.

I'm always prepared. Chill out.

- I'm home! - Mom, you're early.

Samuel,

this looks like a party.

And that's a direct violation of Rule 137.

Zack, tell my mom why this looks like a party.

Because it is a party.

Zack: Happy Anniversary!

- Thank you. - Come on, guys.

All: Happy Anniversary!

I got it! I got it! Yes!

- Zachary? - Yes, Mrs. Powers?

There's something's wrong with the statue.

There is?

Yes. Elvis likes to face the kitchen...

so he can watch me cook!

Now... let's boogie on down! Uh-huh!

(cheering, music plays)

(instrumental theme music plays)