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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,202 --> 00:00:03,771 ANNOUNCER: HELP EVERYONE EXPLORE NEW WORLDS AND IDEAS. 2 00:00:03,804 --> 00:00:05,539 SUPPORT YOUR PBS STATION. 3 00:00:07,241 --> 00:00:10,244 JIMMY SOMERVILLE: * IS IT SO? 4 00:00:10,278 --> 00:00:13,013 * DON'T WANT TO LET YOU GO 5 00:00:13,047 --> 00:00:17,085 * NO, WE NEVER CAN SAY GOOD-BYE, BOY * 6 00:00:17,118 --> 00:00:20,754 * OOH, NO, NO 7 00:00:20,788 --> 00:00:22,856 * I NEVER CAN SAY GOOD-BYE 8 00:00:22,890 --> 00:00:24,725 * NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO 9 00:00:24,758 --> 00:00:28,429 * NO, NO, NO, OOH, OOH 10 00:00:28,462 --> 00:00:30,798 I'M SO EXCITED THAT YOU'RE GOING TO BE 11 00:00:30,831 --> 00:00:33,301 AT MY WEDDING TODAY, MOTHER. 12 00:00:33,334 --> 00:00:34,902 NOW, IS THERE SOMEBODY THERE TO 13 00:00:34,935 --> 00:00:37,238 HELP YOU GET YOUR DRESS ON OVER YOUR HUMP? 14 00:00:39,840 --> 00:00:41,609 UH-HUH. 15 00:00:41,642 --> 00:00:43,477 UH-HUH. 16 00:00:43,511 --> 00:00:47,315 UH-HUH, YEAH, HOLD ON, DEAR, I HAVE ANOTHER CALL. 17 00:00:47,348 --> 00:00:50,251 IT'S GOING TO SOUND AS IF I'M HANGING UP, BUT I'M NOT. 18 00:00:52,453 --> 00:00:54,655 I CAN'T BELIEVE YOUR MOTHER'S 19 00:00:54,688 --> 00:00:57,425 GOING TO BE AT OUR WEDDING. 20 00:00:57,458 --> 00:00:59,893 WHAT DO YOU SUPPOSE SHE'LL GIVE US? 21 00:00:59,927 --> 00:01:01,028 APART FROM THE CREEPS. 22 00:01:02,096 --> 00:01:04,332 OH, NOW, BE NICE. 23 00:01:04,365 --> 00:01:06,900 YOU KNOW HOW MUCH THIS MEANS TO ME. 24 00:01:10,538 --> 00:01:14,142 SHE'S BEEN MOVING A LITTLE SLOWLY LATELY. 25 00:01:14,175 --> 00:01:15,976 I WONDER HOW WE'LL GET HER DOWN THE AISLE. 26 00:01:16,009 --> 00:01:18,379 WELL, PERHAPS WE COULD SHOOT HER OUT OF A CANNON. 27 00:01:20,080 --> 00:01:22,049 AND DON'T MENTION THE HUMP. 28 00:01:23,151 --> 00:01:24,752 IT'S GROWN ANOTHER 6 INCHES 29 00:01:24,785 --> 00:01:26,754 SINCE THE LAST TIME WE SAW HER. 30 00:01:26,787 --> 00:01:27,855 [DOORBELL RINGS] 31 00:01:27,888 --> 00:01:29,490 SHOULDN'T YOU HAVE HER CHECKED? 32 00:01:29,523 --> 00:01:31,592 NO, WELL, THERE'S REALLY NO POINT. 33 00:01:31,625 --> 00:01:35,363 EVERYTHING SHE'S HAD REMOVED JUST KEEPS GROWING BACK. 34 00:01:36,764 --> 00:01:38,666 HELLO, DARLING. 35 00:01:38,699 --> 00:01:41,969 WELL, IT'S HERE-- MY BIG DAY. 36 00:01:42,002 --> 00:01:43,971 YOU MEAN MY BIG DAY. 37 00:01:44,004 --> 00:01:45,606 NO, MINE. 38 00:01:45,639 --> 00:01:48,008 JASPER'S BACK. 39 00:01:48,041 --> 00:01:50,911 JASPER, MY HUSBAND. 40 00:01:50,944 --> 00:01:53,214 BOTH: OH. 41 00:01:53,247 --> 00:01:55,749 DID HE SAY WHERE HE'S BEEN ALL THESE MONTHS? 42 00:01:55,783 --> 00:01:58,919 NO, AND IT FELT RUDE TO ASK. 43 00:01:58,952 --> 00:02:00,254 NOW, JUST DON'T TRY 44 00:02:00,288 --> 00:02:03,657 TO MAKE THIS DAY ALL ABOUT YOU, VIOLET. 45 00:02:03,691 --> 00:02:04,892 NO, OF COURSE NOT. YEAH. 46 00:02:04,925 --> 00:02:07,828 IT'S OUR DAY. IT'S MY DAY. 47 00:02:07,861 --> 00:02:10,030 I LOOK FORWARD TO MEETING HIM, VI. 48 00:02:10,063 --> 00:02:12,400 YOU DID MEET HIM. AT OUR WEDDING. 49 00:02:12,433 --> 00:02:14,635 NOBODY REMEMBERS THAT. 50 00:02:14,668 --> 00:02:17,571 IS THERE ANYTHING MORE I CAN DO TO HELP, STUART? 51 00:02:17,605 --> 00:02:19,873 EVEN THOUGH I'M COMPLETELY KNACKERED. 52 00:02:19,907 --> 00:02:22,009 WHAT EXACTLY IS IT THAT YOU'VE DONE? 53 00:02:22,042 --> 00:02:23,577 OH, YOU KNOW, THIS AND THAT. 54 00:02:23,611 --> 00:02:25,813 [DOORBELL RINGS] 55 00:02:25,846 --> 00:02:28,582 IS THERE A PROFESSIONAL COMING ROUND TO DO YOUR MAKEUP TODAY? 56 00:02:29,883 --> 00:02:31,385 BECAUSE YOU CERTAINLY NEED ONE. 57 00:02:33,454 --> 00:02:35,356 HI. HELLO, ASH. 58 00:02:35,389 --> 00:02:36,957 I'M EXCITED ABOUT YOUR BIG DAY. 59 00:02:36,990 --> 00:02:39,126 OH, THANK YOU. 60 00:02:39,159 --> 00:02:41,662 SOMEBODY KNOWS WHOSE DAY IT IS. 61 00:02:41,695 --> 00:02:45,766 I HAVE SOME NEWS, ASH. MY HUSBAND'S BACK. 62 00:02:45,799 --> 00:02:48,168 AND HE'S EXTREMELY JEALOUS. 63 00:02:48,202 --> 00:02:49,670 I CAN'T WAIT TO MEET HIM. 64 00:02:49,703 --> 00:02:51,572 YOU DID MEET HIM. AT OUR WEDDING. 65 00:02:51,605 --> 00:02:55,276 YOU SEE, IT DIDN'T REGISTER WITH ANYBODY. 66 00:02:55,309 --> 00:02:58,912 EXTREMELY, INSANELY JEALOUS, ASH. 67 00:02:58,946 --> 00:03:00,514 YEAH, I GOT IT. 68 00:03:00,548 --> 00:03:01,482 IS THERE ANYTHING I CAN DO 69 00:03:01,515 --> 00:03:02,950 TO HELP WITH THE WEDDING TODAY, STUART? 70 00:03:02,983 --> 00:03:06,119 WOULD YOU MIND WALKING MY MOTHER DOWN THE AISLE? 71 00:03:06,153 --> 00:03:07,821 IT WOULD BE MY HONOR. 72 00:03:07,855 --> 00:03:09,156 [DOORBELL RINGS] 73 00:03:09,189 --> 00:03:11,292 I KNOW HOW MUCH IT MEANS TO YOU TO HAVE HER THERE. 74 00:03:11,325 --> 00:03:12,793 THANK YOU, ASH. 75 00:03:12,826 --> 00:03:15,028 I FIND THE EASIEST WAY TO MANEUVER HER 76 00:03:15,062 --> 00:03:16,930 IS TO STEER HER BY THE HUMP. 77 00:03:20,000 --> 00:03:22,135 CONGRATULATIONS. 78 00:03:22,169 --> 00:03:25,172 WHAT ARE YOU BOTH DOING HERE? 79 00:03:25,205 --> 00:03:27,308 WE'RE HERE FOR THE WEDDING. 80 00:03:27,341 --> 00:03:30,344 STUART: BUT IT'S NOT FOR ANOTHER 9 HOURS. 81 00:03:30,378 --> 00:03:31,279 I SEE. 82 00:03:32,179 --> 00:03:33,881 WE'LL JUST WAIT THEN. 83 00:03:35,283 --> 00:03:37,385 WELL, YOU TWO REALLY MANAGED 84 00:03:37,418 --> 00:03:40,454 TO SUCK THE LIFE OUT OF THE ROOM. 85 00:03:40,488 --> 00:03:43,557 ACTUALLY, I NEED YOU BOTH TO PICK UP OUR WEDDING CAKE. 86 00:03:43,591 --> 00:03:44,525 CAN YOU DO THAT? 87 00:03:44,558 --> 00:03:45,593 IS IT PAID FOR? 88 00:03:45,626 --> 00:03:46,760 OF COURSE IT IS. 89 00:03:46,794 --> 00:03:48,128 FINE. 90 00:03:48,161 --> 00:03:50,931 WELL, IT WAS A BEAUTIFUL WEDDING. 91 00:03:50,964 --> 00:03:54,702 YES, YES, YES, YES, JUST MOVE IT ALONG. 92 00:03:54,735 --> 00:03:56,103 DO YOU WANT TO HELP US, VIOLET? 93 00:03:56,136 --> 00:03:58,005 I DON'T. THANK YOU, THOUGH. 94 00:03:59,873 --> 00:04:01,442 IT ISN'T PAID FOR, IS IT? 95 00:04:01,475 --> 00:04:02,476 OF COURSE IT'S NOT. 96 00:04:04,978 --> 00:04:06,480 PENELOPE: HELLO. 97 00:04:06,514 --> 00:04:07,581 WE'RE HERE TO PICK UP 98 00:04:07,615 --> 00:04:09,116 A WEDDING CAKE FOR TWO MEN. 99 00:04:09,149 --> 00:04:10,784 IF YOU CAN BELIEVE IT. 100 00:04:10,818 --> 00:04:13,287 SURE, THAT'S £250. 101 00:04:15,155 --> 00:04:17,458 WE WERE TOLD IT WAS ALREADY PAID FOR. 102 00:04:17,491 --> 00:04:18,859 IT WASN'T. 103 00:04:18,892 --> 00:04:20,093 OH, DEAR. 104 00:04:25,599 --> 00:04:28,268 I'LL STAND HERE TILL I DIE BEFORE I PAY FOR THAT CAKE. 105 00:04:29,470 --> 00:04:31,104 FINE. 106 00:04:31,138 --> 00:04:32,806 I WAS ONLY GOING TO WASTE THIS MONEY 107 00:04:32,840 --> 00:04:34,274 ON A PACEMAKER ANYWAY. 108 00:04:36,844 --> 00:04:38,412 OHHH! 109 00:04:41,649 --> 00:04:42,583 WHERE'S HE GOING? 110 00:04:42,616 --> 00:04:43,917 I DON'T KNOW. 111 00:04:43,951 --> 00:04:46,454 WELL, HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO GET THIS TO WEDDING? 112 00:04:46,487 --> 00:04:50,123 I DON'T REALLY GET INVOLVED IN THIS PART OF IT. 113 00:04:50,157 --> 00:04:52,393 WELL, COME ON, MASON, IT'S ONLY A FEW STREETS. 114 00:04:52,426 --> 00:04:55,563 YOU TAKE ONE END, AND I'LL TAKE THE OTHER. 115 00:04:59,132 --> 00:05:00,233 THERE. 116 00:05:16,950 --> 00:05:19,420 YOU SEE, THIS ISN'T SO BAD. 117 00:05:19,453 --> 00:05:20,253 NOT AT ALL. 118 00:05:20,287 --> 00:05:21,855 OH, DRAT, I THINK I'VE GOT 119 00:05:21,889 --> 00:05:23,691 A TINY BIT OF ICING ON MY FACE. 120 00:05:23,724 --> 00:05:24,658 CAN YOU SEE IT? 121 00:05:25,726 --> 00:05:26,660 NO. 122 00:05:36,670 --> 00:05:37,971 NOW I SEE IT. 123 00:05:39,707 --> 00:05:43,444 HURRY, BOYS, IT'S ALMOST TIME TO LEAVE FOR THE CEREMONY. 124 00:05:43,477 --> 00:05:45,178 FREDDIE: BE RIGHT DOWN. 125 00:05:45,212 --> 00:05:47,280 WHO THE HELL LET YOU IN? 126 00:05:47,314 --> 00:05:48,949 KNOCK KNOCK. 127 00:05:48,982 --> 00:05:51,151 OH, YOU LOOK LOVELY, VIOLET. 128 00:05:51,184 --> 00:05:53,521 PLEASE, YOU CANNOT FLIRT WITH ME LIKE THAT 129 00:05:53,554 --> 00:05:55,122 IN FRONT OF MY HUSBAND. 130 00:05:55,155 --> 00:05:56,690 I WASN'T FLIRTING. 131 00:05:56,724 --> 00:05:59,560 I'M SERIOUS, ASH. HE'S VERY POSSESSIVE. 132 00:05:59,593 --> 00:06:02,229 HE CAN NEVER KNOW WHAT HAPPENED BETWEEN US. 133 00:06:02,262 --> 00:06:03,897 NOTHING HAPPENED BETWEEN US. 134 00:06:03,931 --> 00:06:06,500 GOOD. THAT SOUNDED VERY CONVINCING. 135 00:06:09,102 --> 00:06:12,172 YOU LOOK VERY DASHING, ASH. 136 00:06:12,205 --> 00:06:15,008 YOU LOOK PRETTY HANDSOME YOURSELF. 137 00:06:15,042 --> 00:06:17,110 VIOLET, WHAT ARE YOU WEARING? 138 00:06:18,345 --> 00:06:20,814 THAT IS NOT THE DRESS WE PICKED OUT. 139 00:06:20,848 --> 00:06:22,783 I THOUGHT THIS WAS MORE PLAYFUL. 140 00:06:22,816 --> 00:06:24,151 IT'S WHITE. 141 00:06:24,184 --> 00:06:26,487 OH, IT'S FURTHEST THING IN THE WORLD FROM WHITE. 142 00:06:26,520 --> 00:06:28,221 IT'S CREAM. 143 00:06:28,255 --> 00:06:30,323 IT LOOKS LIKE YOU'RE GETTING MARRIED. 144 00:06:30,357 --> 00:06:33,093 THAT'S RIDICULOUS. REALLY? 145 00:06:34,995 --> 00:06:36,096 I HAVEN'T GOT TIME FOR THIS. 146 00:06:36,129 --> 00:06:37,931 WHAT ABOUT THE LIMO? IS IT OUT FRONT? 147 00:06:37,965 --> 00:06:41,535 OH, I THOUGHT WE COULD TAKE A TAXI. 148 00:06:41,569 --> 00:06:45,138 YOU'RE A REALLY CRAP MATRON OF HONOR, DO YOU KNOW THAT? 149 00:06:45,172 --> 00:06:49,042 STUART BIXBY, YOU LOOK SPIFFING. 150 00:06:49,076 --> 00:06:51,779 THANK YOU, FREDDIE. SO DO YOU. 151 00:06:51,812 --> 00:06:54,648 THANK YOU, AND I'VE ONLY ONE QUESTION TO ASK YOU. 152 00:06:54,682 --> 00:06:55,649 YES, FREDDIE? 153 00:06:55,683 --> 00:06:57,017 WHAT THE FUCK IS SHE WEARING? 154 00:07:01,989 --> 00:07:03,557 IT'S CREAM. 155 00:07:03,591 --> 00:07:06,760 YOU LOOK LIKE SOMETHING OUT OF A DICKENS NOVEL. 156 00:07:06,794 --> 00:07:08,161 IS THAT GOOD? 157 00:07:08,195 --> 00:07:09,797 NO. 158 00:07:09,830 --> 00:07:11,431 I THINK YOU LOOK GREAT, VIOLET. 159 00:07:11,465 --> 00:07:13,233 OH, KNOCK IT OFF WITH THE COMPLIMENTS, ASH. 160 00:07:13,266 --> 00:07:14,768 IT'S MAKING ME UNCOMFORTABLE. 161 00:07:14,802 --> 00:07:15,936 NOW, WE SHOULD GO. 162 00:07:15,969 --> 00:07:18,138 I DON'T WANT TO KEEP MOTHER WAITING. 163 00:07:18,171 --> 00:07:20,841 OH, THIS IS IT, FREDDIE. 164 00:07:20,874 --> 00:07:24,077 THE NEXT TIME WE COME BACK TO THIS FLAT, 165 00:07:24,111 --> 00:07:25,278 WE'LL BE MARRIED. 166 00:07:25,312 --> 00:07:26,680 LET'S JUST HOPE THEY DON'T MARRY 167 00:07:26,714 --> 00:07:28,516 ONE OF US TO VIOLET BY ACCIDENT. 168 00:07:30,017 --> 00:07:32,219 OH, I'VE JUST REALIZED SOMETHING. 169 00:07:32,252 --> 00:07:33,186 WHAT? 170 00:07:33,220 --> 00:07:35,789 I'VE NEVER BEEN TO A GAY WEDDING. 171 00:07:35,823 --> 00:07:36,957 NEITHER HAVE I. 172 00:07:36,990 --> 00:07:38,659 OH, I HAVEN'T, EITHER. 173 00:07:38,692 --> 00:07:40,027 I HAVE. THEY'RE LOADS OF FUN. 174 00:07:42,429 --> 00:07:45,132 AND WAIT TILL EVERYBODY SEES THE CAKE. 175 00:07:47,134 --> 00:07:49,803 HOW MUCH LONGER WILL IT BE FOR THE NEW CAKE? 176 00:07:49,837 --> 00:07:51,705 I DON'T KNOW. 177 00:07:51,739 --> 00:07:54,775 THEY HAVE TO BAKE IT, I GUESS. 178 00:07:54,808 --> 00:07:56,176 PROBABLY TAKES A WHILE. 179 00:07:57,444 --> 00:07:59,647 AT THIS POINT, I FEEL IT'S IMPORTANT TO MENTION 180 00:07:59,680 --> 00:08:01,114 HOW MUCH I DISLIKE YOU. 181 00:08:01,148 --> 00:08:02,883 HELLO, MASON. I'M HERE TO HELP YOU 182 00:08:02,916 --> 00:08:04,017 PICK UP THE CAKE. 183 00:08:04,051 --> 00:08:07,087 WE ALREADY PICKED UP-- OH, NEVER MIND. 184 00:08:07,120 --> 00:08:08,355 THANK YOU FOR COMING. 185 00:08:11,992 --> 00:08:13,794 SHALL WE GIVE IT A GO? 186 00:08:13,827 --> 00:08:15,228 ALL RIGHT. 187 00:08:34,414 --> 00:08:37,551 LET'S MAKE SURE WE WALK VERY SLOWLY. 188 00:08:37,585 --> 00:08:39,419 YES, OF COURSE. 189 00:08:39,452 --> 00:08:42,089 BE CAREFUL, THERE'S SOMEBODY ON A SKATEBOARD. 190 00:08:42,122 --> 00:08:43,423 WATCH OUT, A BICYCLE IS COMING. 191 00:08:45,425 --> 00:08:46,359 THAT WAS CLOSE. 192 00:08:53,000 --> 00:08:56,269 I'M HAVING SUCH DÉJÀ VU RIGHT NOW. 193 00:08:58,205 --> 00:09:00,507 WELL, EVERYTHING LOOKS LOVELY, STUART. 194 00:09:00,540 --> 00:09:01,642 OH, THANK YOU. 195 00:09:01,675 --> 00:09:03,176 IT'S REALLY COME TOGETHER. 196 00:09:03,210 --> 00:09:04,578 WELL, IT WAS A GROUP EFFORT. 197 00:09:04,612 --> 00:09:05,846 SHUT UP. 198 00:09:07,080 --> 00:09:08,448 IS MOTHER HERE? 199 00:09:08,481 --> 00:09:10,918 WELL, I DON'T SEE ANY CLOVEN FOOTPRINTS... 200 00:09:12,119 --> 00:09:13,887 AND THE WALLS AREN'T DRIPPING WITH BLOOD, 201 00:09:13,921 --> 00:09:16,890 SO PERHAPS SHE HASN'T ARRIVED YET. 202 00:09:16,924 --> 00:09:18,058 THERE SHE IS. 203 00:09:19,559 --> 00:09:21,128 I JUST LOOKED FOR THE HORNS. 204 00:09:23,496 --> 00:09:25,398 HIT HIM AGAIN. 205 00:09:25,432 --> 00:09:26,834 COME ON. SHALL WE GO AND SAY HELLO? 206 00:09:26,867 --> 00:09:27,801 OH, DO I HAVE TO? 207 00:09:27,835 --> 00:09:29,603 OH, IT'S OUR WEDDING. 208 00:09:29,637 --> 00:09:31,304 OF COURSE YOU HAVE TO. 209 00:09:31,338 --> 00:09:34,675 WE HAVE TO BE COURTEOUS TO EACH AND EVERY GUEST. 210 00:09:34,708 --> 00:09:36,009 STUART. NOT NOW. 211 00:09:37,678 --> 00:09:38,612 HELLO, MOTHER. 212 00:09:38,646 --> 00:09:39,747 HELLO, STUART. 213 00:09:39,780 --> 00:09:42,182 HELLO, MILDRED. THANK YOU FOR COMING. 214 00:09:42,215 --> 00:09:46,253 IT MEANS A LOT TO STUART...AND ME. 215 00:09:47,387 --> 00:09:49,089 AND MAY I ADD THAT YOU'RE LOOKING 216 00:09:49,122 --> 00:09:52,993 SIMPLY STUNNING IN...THAT. 217 00:09:54,561 --> 00:09:57,497 IF I DIDN'T KNOW BETTER I'D SAY YOU WERE 90. 218 00:09:57,530 --> 00:09:59,532 OH, WHY, THANK YOU. 219 00:09:59,566 --> 00:10:00,901 OH, I'M SO HAPPY 220 00:10:00,934 --> 00:10:03,270 YOU'RE GOING TO SEE ME GET MARRIED, MOTHER. 221 00:10:03,303 --> 00:10:05,673 I KNOW YOU'VE HAD TO WAIT A BIT LONGER 222 00:10:05,706 --> 00:10:07,240 THAN YOU'D ANTICIPATED. 223 00:10:07,274 --> 00:10:10,944 WELL, I JUST WISH I KNEW ANYBODY WHO WAS STILL ALIVE, 224 00:10:10,978 --> 00:10:12,946 SO I COULD BRAG ABOUT IT. 225 00:10:14,081 --> 00:10:17,250 THAT MEANS MORE TO ME THAN YOU KNOW. 226 00:10:20,487 --> 00:10:23,023 CAN WE STEP OVER THERE FOR A SECOND? 227 00:10:23,056 --> 00:10:25,092 ARE YOU GETTING EMOTIONAL? 228 00:10:25,125 --> 00:10:27,627 NO, I THINK SHE FARTED. 229 00:10:30,163 --> 00:10:31,298 WHERE'S YOUR HUSBAND, VIOLET? 230 00:10:31,331 --> 00:10:33,000 SHOULDN'T HE BE HERE BY NOW? 231 00:10:33,033 --> 00:10:35,669 WELL, JASPER TENDS TO BE A BIT UNPREDICTABLE. 232 00:10:35,703 --> 00:10:37,070 SOMETIMES HE'S EARLY 233 00:10:37,104 --> 00:10:40,507 AND SOMETIMES HE DISAPPEARS FOR 3 MONTHS AT A TIME. 234 00:10:40,540 --> 00:10:43,711 WE ALL HAVE OUR LITTLE ECCENTRICITIES, I SUPPOSE. 235 00:10:43,744 --> 00:10:44,912 OH, LOOK, HERE HE COMES. 236 00:10:44,945 --> 00:10:46,847 NOW, REMEMBER, HE'S INSANELY JEALOUS, 237 00:10:46,880 --> 00:10:49,616 SO NO LEERING AT ME WITH YOUR BUG EYES. 238 00:10:49,649 --> 00:10:51,451 JASPER, DARLING, OVER HERE. 239 00:10:52,585 --> 00:10:53,721 I NEED MONEY. 240 00:10:53,754 --> 00:10:55,022 SO ROMANTIC. 241 00:10:56,189 --> 00:10:57,791 IS SOMEONE GOING TO SPLURGE 242 00:10:57,825 --> 00:10:59,626 ON A LITTLE GIFT FOR THEIR WIFE? 243 00:11:00,928 --> 00:11:02,996 I'M GONNA NEED MORE THAN THIS. 244 00:11:03,030 --> 00:11:05,432 I OWE PEOPLE MONEY. BAD PEOPLE. 245 00:11:05,465 --> 00:11:07,534 YOU'RE SO OUTRAGEOUS, DARLING. 246 00:11:07,567 --> 00:11:08,769 COME ON, I WANNA GO. 247 00:11:08,802 --> 00:11:10,370 NO, NO, NO, JASPER, WE CAN'T GO. 248 00:11:10,403 --> 00:11:12,572 DON'T TELL ME WHAT I CAN DO. 249 00:11:12,605 --> 00:11:14,775 OI, GIVE ME ONE OF THOSE. 250 00:11:14,808 --> 00:11:16,043 ISN'T HE A RIOT? 251 00:11:17,344 --> 00:11:19,679 WE ALWAYS HAVE THAT RAPID FIRE 252 00:11:19,713 --> 00:11:21,014 KATHARINE HEPBURN, SPENCER TRACY 253 00:11:21,048 --> 00:11:22,883 BACK AND FORTH, RAT-A-TAT-TAT. 254 00:11:23,984 --> 00:11:26,519 OH, WHERE HAVE YOU TWO BEEN? 255 00:11:26,553 --> 00:11:27,454 IN HELL. 256 00:11:29,089 --> 00:11:31,992 WHY ARE YOU DRESSED LIKE THE BRIDE? 257 00:11:32,025 --> 00:11:33,927 SHOULDN'T STUART BE WEARING THAT? 258 00:11:38,198 --> 00:11:40,133 THEY CAN NEVER KNOW WE JOKE LIKE THAT. 259 00:11:42,302 --> 00:11:44,204 WEREN'T YOU GUYS SUPPOSED TO GET THE CAKE? 260 00:11:44,237 --> 00:11:46,506 AND WEREN'T YOU SUPPOSED TO BE THE ONE GETTING MARRIED? 261 00:11:46,539 --> 00:11:48,575 OH, THAT'S RIGHT, YOUR GIRLFRIEND DUMPED YOU. 262 00:11:48,608 --> 00:11:49,509 PENELOPE. 263 00:11:50,778 --> 00:11:53,180 SO SORRY, SWEETHEART. 264 00:11:53,213 --> 00:11:56,283 IT'S BEEN A VERY STRESSFUL DAY. 265 00:11:56,316 --> 00:11:58,385 WE HAD A BIT OF AN ISSUE WITH THE CAKE. OH. 266 00:11:58,418 --> 00:12:00,253 THE NEW ONE SHOULD ARRIVE IN TIME, THOUGH, 267 00:12:00,287 --> 00:12:01,654 AND DON'T YOU GO ANYWHERE NEAR IT. 268 00:12:01,688 --> 00:12:02,655 I WON'T. 269 00:12:02,689 --> 00:12:05,558 THIS IS THE LAST DRESS I OWNED. 270 00:12:05,592 --> 00:12:06,626 SOMETHING HAPPENS TO THIS ONE, 271 00:12:06,659 --> 00:12:07,594 I'VE GOT NO CLOTHES. 272 00:12:08,661 --> 00:12:10,263 OH, GOOD, YOU'RE ALL HERE. 273 00:12:10,297 --> 00:12:11,598 WE'RE GOING TO START SOON. 274 00:12:11,631 --> 00:12:12,565 DID YOU GET THE CAKE? 275 00:12:12,599 --> 00:12:15,335 YES, YOU OWE ME £1,000. 276 00:12:15,368 --> 00:12:16,870 ASH, YOU DO KNOW YOU'RE WALKING 277 00:12:16,904 --> 00:12:18,505 STUART'S MOTHER DOWN THE AISLE? 278 00:12:18,538 --> 00:12:19,472 I KNOW. 279 00:12:19,506 --> 00:12:21,608 YES, AND ARE YOU READY WITH THE RINGS? 280 00:12:21,641 --> 00:12:22,810 I'M YOUR BEST MAN, FREDDIE. 281 00:12:22,843 --> 00:12:23,844 I WOULDN'T FORGET. 282 00:12:23,877 --> 00:12:24,945 NO, OF COURSE YOU WOULDN'T. 283 00:12:24,978 --> 00:12:26,113 I STILL CAN'T BELIEVE YOU ASKED 284 00:12:26,146 --> 00:12:28,215 HIM TO BE YOUR BEST MAN AND NOT ME. 285 00:12:28,248 --> 00:12:30,918 WHY ON EARTH WOULD I ASK YOU TO BE MY BEST MAN? 286 00:12:30,951 --> 00:12:32,552 BECAUSE I'M YOUR BROTHER. 287 00:12:32,585 --> 00:12:33,821 SO? 288 00:12:33,854 --> 00:12:36,056 ARE WE ALMOST READY TO GET STARTED? 289 00:12:36,089 --> 00:12:38,225 OH, THANK YOU. YES, OF COURSE. 290 00:12:38,258 --> 00:12:40,260 AM I MARRYING THE TWO OF YOU? 291 00:12:40,293 --> 00:12:43,163 NO. NO, IT'S STILL ME AND FREDDIE. 292 00:12:43,196 --> 00:12:45,866 I'M SORRY, I GOT CONFUSED BECAUSE-- 293 00:12:45,899 --> 00:12:47,901 SHE'S DRESSED LIKE A BRIDE. I KNOW. 294 00:12:47,935 --> 00:12:49,369 BUT THANK YOU, DARLING. 295 00:12:49,402 --> 00:12:51,438 NO, NOT THANK YOU. 296 00:12:51,471 --> 00:12:53,907 I HAD NO IDEA THIS DRESS WOULD BE SUCH A HIT. 297 00:12:53,941 --> 00:12:55,042 IT'S NOT. 298 00:12:55,976 --> 00:12:57,310 ARE WE BEING MARRIED BY A WOMAN? 299 00:12:57,344 --> 00:12:59,379 ISN'T THAT A BIT NON-TRADITIONAL? 300 00:13:07,654 --> 00:13:10,190 WELL, SO IS TWO GROOMS. 301 00:13:10,223 --> 00:13:12,125 POINT TAKEN. 302 00:13:12,159 --> 00:13:14,127 WELL, SHALL WE ALL TAKE OUR PLACES, 303 00:13:14,161 --> 00:13:15,829 AND I'LL GO AND GET MRS. BIXBY? 304 00:13:15,863 --> 00:13:16,930 AND REMEMBER, ASH. 305 00:13:16,964 --> 00:13:18,398 YEAH, I KNOW. 306 00:13:18,431 --> 00:13:19,399 STEER HER BY THE HUMP. 307 00:13:23,904 --> 00:13:25,305 WHAT ARE YOU THINKING? 308 00:13:25,338 --> 00:13:27,908 THAT WE KNOW A LOT OF UNATTRACTIVE PEOPLE. 309 00:13:32,812 --> 00:13:34,747 HELLO, MRS. BIXBY. 310 00:13:34,781 --> 00:13:37,117 I'M HERE TO ESCORT YOU DOWN THE AISLE. 311 00:13:37,150 --> 00:13:39,019 ARE YOU A LITTLE GAY BOY? 312 00:13:40,921 --> 00:13:42,956 NO, I'M STRAIGHT. 313 00:13:42,990 --> 00:13:47,060 I WANT A LITTLE GAY BOY TO WALK ME DOWN THE AISLE. 314 00:13:47,094 --> 00:13:50,830 FINE, I'M A LITTLE GAY BOY. 315 00:13:50,864 --> 00:13:53,566 GOOD. CAN I HAVE A HUG FIRST? 316 00:13:53,600 --> 00:13:55,202 WELL, OF COURSE YOU CAN. 317 00:13:57,370 --> 00:13:59,339 AHHH. 318 00:14:02,342 --> 00:14:06,113 AHHH, ALL RIGHT, YOU ALL DONE WITH THE HUG NOW? 319 00:14:09,382 --> 00:14:10,550 MRS. BIXBY? 320 00:14:16,156 --> 00:14:22,229 MRS. BIXBY, OH, GOD, OH...VIOLET. 321 00:14:28,135 --> 00:14:29,769 VIOLET. 322 00:14:29,802 --> 00:14:31,939 OH, WILL YOU EXCUSE ME, DARLING? 323 00:14:31,972 --> 00:14:33,941 BRING ME BACK CIGARETTES. 324 00:14:33,974 --> 00:14:35,442 OH, HELLO, MILDRED. 325 00:14:35,475 --> 00:14:36,809 YOU LOOK LOVELY. 326 00:14:36,843 --> 00:14:37,844 SHE CAN'T HEAR YOU. 327 00:14:37,877 --> 00:14:40,280 GOOD, BECAUSE SHE LOOKS AWFUL. 328 00:14:40,313 --> 00:14:42,315 IS SHE SLEEPING? 329 00:14:42,349 --> 00:14:43,683 NOT EXACTLY. 330 00:14:43,716 --> 00:14:45,152 DID SHE PASS OUT? 331 00:14:45,185 --> 00:14:47,020 YOU'RE GETTING WARMER. 332 00:14:47,054 --> 00:14:48,588 OH, GOOD LORD, SHE'S NOT--? 333 00:14:48,621 --> 00:14:49,822 PLEASE GET HER OFF ME. 334 00:14:49,856 --> 00:14:50,958 FREDDIE: WHAT ARE YOU TWO DAWDLING FOR? 335 00:14:50,991 --> 00:14:52,392 WE'RE ABOUT TO START. 336 00:14:52,425 --> 00:14:54,727 I'M AFRAID SOMETHING RATHER UNPLEASANT HAS HAPPENED. 337 00:14:54,761 --> 00:14:58,298 WHAT? OH, IS SHE FARTING AGAIN? 338 00:14:58,331 --> 00:15:00,367 NO, SHE'S DEAD. 339 00:15:00,400 --> 00:15:04,771 OH, NO, OH, OH, GOD, ARE YOU SURE? 340 00:15:04,804 --> 00:15:06,339 SHE ONCE FELL OUT OF A THIRD FLOOR WINDOW 341 00:15:06,373 --> 00:15:08,208 AND GOT RIGHT BACK UP. 342 00:15:08,241 --> 00:15:09,609 I'M 100% SURE AND IF YOU DON'T HELP 343 00:15:09,642 --> 00:15:12,412 GET HER OFF ME NOW I THINK I'M GOING TO SCREAM. 344 00:15:12,445 --> 00:15:13,880 SO DRAMATIC THERE. 345 00:15:22,389 --> 00:15:25,892 STRANGE THAT'S THE FIRST TIME I'VE EVER TOUCHED HER. 346 00:15:25,925 --> 00:15:27,027 UGGGHHH. 347 00:15:27,060 --> 00:15:29,429 FEELS LIKE SHE'S STILL ON ME. 348 00:15:29,462 --> 00:15:31,031 WE'RE GOING TO HAVE TO CALL SOMEBODY. 349 00:15:31,064 --> 00:15:32,832 NO, WE CAN'T. WHAT DO YOU MEAN? 350 00:15:32,865 --> 00:15:34,234 WELL, IT'S BEEN STUART'S DREAM 351 00:15:34,267 --> 00:15:35,702 FOR HIS MOTHER TO SEE US MARRIED. 352 00:15:35,735 --> 00:15:37,204 NO, WE'LL HAVE TO WAIT TILL AFTER THE CEREMONY. 353 00:15:37,237 --> 00:15:38,705 NO, NO, WE CAN'T DO THAT. 354 00:15:38,738 --> 00:15:39,973 WHY NOT? 355 00:15:40,007 --> 00:15:41,741 BECAUSE IT'S ICKY. 356 00:15:41,774 --> 00:15:43,310 BUT NOW LOOK, WE JUST SAY THAT 357 00:15:43,343 --> 00:15:45,612 SHE DIED A FEW MINUTES LATER, THAT'S ALL. 358 00:15:45,645 --> 00:15:49,716 OH, OTHERWISE IT WILL BREAK STUART'S HEART. 359 00:15:49,749 --> 00:15:51,284 OH, FREDDIE, I'M NOT SURE ABOUT THIS. 360 00:15:51,318 --> 00:15:53,987 NO, WE HAVE TO DO IT, VI, FOR STUART. 361 00:16:05,832 --> 00:16:07,300 WELL, THERE'S NO GOING BACK NOW. 362 00:16:14,707 --> 00:16:17,210 ASH, I THOUGHT YOU WERE GOING TO WALK MY MOTHER 363 00:16:17,244 --> 00:16:19,946 DOWN TO THE FRONT ROW. 364 00:16:19,979 --> 00:16:23,550 SHE REALLY WANTED TO STAY WHERE SHE WAS. 365 00:16:23,583 --> 00:16:26,286 IT'S TRUE. SHE WAS DEAD SET AGAINST MOVING. 366 00:16:28,221 --> 00:16:29,989 WELL, YOU KNOW HOW STUBBORN SHE CAN BE. 367 00:16:30,023 --> 00:16:32,159 SHE WON'T BUDGE ONCE SHE'S MADE UP HER MIND. 368 00:16:32,192 --> 00:16:33,360 THAT'S TRUE. YES. 369 00:16:36,329 --> 00:16:37,930 STUART, LET ME JUST FIX YOUR TIE. 370 00:16:37,964 --> 00:16:40,733 ALL RIGHT, THAT'S ENOUGH. GET OFF ME. 371 00:16:40,767 --> 00:16:41,768 ALL RIGHT, COME ON. 372 00:16:41,801 --> 00:16:43,070 LET'S GET THIS THING GOING. 373 00:16:43,103 --> 00:16:45,272 I BELIEVE YOU BOTH WROTE YOUR OWN VOWS. 374 00:16:45,305 --> 00:16:46,306 OH, YES, I WROTE THEM DOWN 375 00:16:46,339 --> 00:16:48,241 AND GAVE THEM TO VIOLET TO HOLD. 376 00:16:48,275 --> 00:16:49,742 CAN I HAVE THE PAPER, PLEASE? 377 00:16:49,776 --> 00:16:51,544 OH, I'M SORRY, DARLING. 378 00:16:51,578 --> 00:16:53,180 I LEFT IT ON THE KITCHEN COUNTER. 379 00:16:53,213 --> 00:16:54,847 I CAN SEE IT NOW, NEXT TO 380 00:16:54,881 --> 00:16:56,749 THE LETTERS I FORGOT TO POST, 381 00:16:56,783 --> 00:16:59,052 AND A DEFROSTING HAM. 382 00:16:59,086 --> 00:17:00,820 AS A MATRON OF HONOR, YOU HAVE BEEN 383 00:17:00,853 --> 00:17:03,456 ABSOLUTELY NO FRIGGING HELP AT ALL. 384 00:17:10,997 --> 00:17:12,832 WELL, ALL RIGHT, WELL, LET'S JUST, ER, WING IT. 385 00:17:12,865 --> 00:17:14,201 I'LL GO FIRST. 386 00:17:14,234 --> 00:17:17,837 STUART, YOU ARE THE BEE'S KNEES. 387 00:17:19,472 --> 00:17:20,373 NOW YOU GO. 388 00:17:22,342 --> 00:17:23,810 THAT WAS IT? YES. 389 00:17:23,843 --> 00:17:25,812 BUT IT'S RATHER ABRUPT. 390 00:17:25,845 --> 00:17:27,414 YEAH, ALL RIGHT, ER, ER, 391 00:17:27,447 --> 00:17:31,017 FREDDIE, 50 YEARS AGO WHEN I FIRST MET-- 392 00:17:31,050 --> 00:17:33,986 THANK YOU. OH, THAT WAS SWEET. 393 00:17:34,020 --> 00:17:36,189 YES, RIGHT, NOW DO YOUR THING. 394 00:17:36,223 --> 00:17:38,858 FREDERICK THORNHILL, DO YOU TAKE THIS MAN 395 00:17:38,891 --> 00:17:41,461 TO BE YOUR LAWFULLY WEDDED HUSBAND? 396 00:17:41,494 --> 00:17:42,729 I DO. 397 00:17:42,762 --> 00:17:45,132 AND STUART BIXBY, DO YOU TAKE THIS MAN 398 00:17:45,165 --> 00:17:48,135 TO BE YOUR LAWFULLY WEDDED HUSBAND? 399 00:17:48,168 --> 00:17:48,935 I DO. 400 00:17:48,968 --> 00:17:50,503 AND NOW FOR THE RINGS. 401 00:17:50,537 --> 00:17:51,704 HURRY UP. 402 00:17:51,738 --> 00:17:52,772 OH, NO, WE'LL DO THE RINGS LATER. 403 00:17:52,805 --> 00:17:54,107 JUST WRAP IT UP. 404 00:17:54,141 --> 00:17:57,810 OK, THEN, I NOW PRONOUNCE YOU HUSBAND AND HUSBAND. 405 00:17:57,844 --> 00:17:59,946 [APPLAUSE] 406 00:18:18,965 --> 00:18:20,800 YOU SURE YOU'RE ALL RIGHT? 407 00:18:20,833 --> 00:18:24,003 YES, ACTUALLY, I'M OK. 408 00:18:24,036 --> 00:18:25,738 I'M JUST SO HAPPY THAT MOTHER WAS ABLE 409 00:18:25,772 --> 00:18:28,608 TO SEE ME MARRIED BEFORE SHE PASSED ON. 410 00:18:28,641 --> 00:18:29,909 SHE WAITED FOR YOU. 411 00:18:29,942 --> 00:18:33,146 SHE DID, AND THAT MEANS EVERYTHING TO ME. 412 00:18:33,180 --> 00:18:36,283 AND SHE HAD SUCH A GOOD LIFE. 413 00:18:36,316 --> 00:18:37,317 WELL, A LONG ONE. 414 00:18:38,718 --> 00:18:42,755 ASH, I THINK YOU WERE THE LAST PERSON TO TALK TO HER. 415 00:18:42,789 --> 00:18:44,824 CAN YOU REMEMBER HER FINAL WORDS? 416 00:18:48,060 --> 00:18:49,529 "ARE YOU A LITTLE GAY BOY?" 417 00:18:51,431 --> 00:18:54,234 SEEMS FITTING SOMEHOW. 418 00:18:54,267 --> 00:18:55,968 I'M SO GLAD YOU'RE ALL RIGHT. 419 00:18:56,002 --> 00:18:59,038 YES, I AM. YEAH, I REALLY AM. 420 00:18:59,071 --> 00:19:01,974 WELL, IT WAS A BEAUTIFUL CEREMONY. 421 00:19:02,008 --> 00:19:03,576 AND SEEING TWO MEN MARRIED 422 00:19:03,610 --> 00:19:06,379 DIDN'T LOOK NEARLY AS WEIRD AS I THOUGHT IT WOULD. 423 00:19:08,815 --> 00:19:09,982 IT DID TO ME. 424 00:19:10,917 --> 00:19:12,252 THERE YOU ARE. 425 00:19:12,285 --> 00:19:14,120 COME ON, LET'S GET OUT OF HERE. 426 00:19:14,153 --> 00:19:16,656 OH, LET'S STAY A LITTLE LONGER, JASPER. 427 00:19:16,689 --> 00:19:18,925 OH, THAT'S HER HUSBAND. 428 00:19:18,958 --> 00:19:20,893 BESIDES, WE HAVEN'T EVEN HAD CAKE YET. 429 00:19:20,927 --> 00:19:21,861 OH, THAT'S RIGHT. 430 00:19:21,894 --> 00:19:22,829 WHERE'S THE CAKE, MASON? 431 00:19:22,862 --> 00:19:24,130 IT'S COMING. 432 00:19:24,163 --> 00:19:26,333 I'LL LET YOU KNOW AS SOON AS IT'S HERE. 433 00:19:26,366 --> 00:19:28,034 I SAID I WANT TO GO. 434 00:19:28,067 --> 00:19:31,103 BUT I STILL HAVE MORE MAID OF HONOR DUTIES TO FULFILL. 435 00:19:31,137 --> 00:19:32,972 "MATRON." WHAT DUTIES? 436 00:19:33,005 --> 00:19:34,407 YOU HAVEN'T DONE ANYTHING. 437 00:19:34,441 --> 00:19:37,410 WELL, IT'S ALL BEEN BEHIND THE SCENES, DARLING. 438 00:19:37,444 --> 00:19:39,712 I'M NOT SURPRISED. SHE'S PRETTY USELESS. 439 00:19:39,746 --> 00:19:41,047 NOW, COME ON. WE'RE GOING. 440 00:19:42,282 --> 00:19:43,483 HEY. 441 00:19:43,516 --> 00:19:45,051 YEAH? 442 00:19:45,084 --> 00:19:47,587 DON'T TALK TO HER LIKE THAT. 443 00:19:47,620 --> 00:19:49,789 AND WHO THE BLOODY HELL ARE YOU? 444 00:19:49,822 --> 00:19:51,258 I'M HER BOYFRIEND. 445 00:20:01,601 --> 00:20:02,569 IT'S HERE. 446 00:20:08,308 --> 00:20:11,278 AT LEAST NO ONE WOULD SAY OUR WEDDING WAS BORING. 447 00:20:11,311 --> 00:20:15,715 I CAN'T BELIEVE AFTER ALL THESE YEARS, WE'RE HUSBANDS. 448 00:20:15,748 --> 00:20:17,817 I KNOW. 449 00:20:17,850 --> 00:20:19,752 IT FEELS A BIT DIFFERENT, DOESN'T IT? 450 00:20:19,786 --> 00:20:20,987 YES, IT DOES. 451 00:20:22,489 --> 00:20:25,525 OH, LOOK, WE'VE FORGOTTEN TO TAKE OFF 452 00:20:25,558 --> 00:20:30,229 BALTHAZAR'S TINY TUXEDO. 453 00:20:30,263 --> 00:20:31,998 THERE YOU GO. 454 00:20:33,466 --> 00:20:36,135 THOSE PHOTOS ARE GONNA LOOK HILARIOUS. 455 00:20:36,168 --> 00:20:38,705 AND THANK GOD VIOLET IS FINALLY 456 00:20:38,738 --> 00:20:41,941 GOING TO LEAVE THAT DREADFUL MAN. 457 00:20:41,974 --> 00:20:45,077 SHE WOULD HAVE BEEN MUCH BETTER OFF AS A LESBIAN. 458 00:20:45,111 --> 00:20:48,247 YES, SO MANY OF THEM WOULD, REALLY. 459 00:20:48,281 --> 00:20:50,450 IT WAS EXTREMELY CHIVALROUS, 460 00:20:50,483 --> 00:20:51,418 THE WAY ASH DEFENDED HER. 461 00:20:51,451 --> 00:20:52,352 I WAS VERY PROUD. 462 00:20:52,385 --> 00:20:54,321 WE'RE DOING A GOOD JOB WITH HIM. 463 00:20:54,354 --> 00:20:55,322 WE ARE. 464 00:20:56,589 --> 00:20:58,858 DO YOU SUPPOSE ANYTHING EVER HAPPENED BETWEEN-- 465 00:20:58,891 --> 00:21:00,092 I NEVER WANT TO KNOW. 466 00:21:00,126 --> 00:21:02,562 IT'S TOO DISTURBING TO EVEN CONTEMPLATE. 467 00:21:02,595 --> 00:21:04,331 TRUE. 468 00:21:04,364 --> 00:21:06,433 THIS CAKE IS ACTUALLY QUITE TASTY. 469 00:21:06,466 --> 00:21:09,268 I'M GLAD WE MANAGED TO SCRAPE SO MUCH OF IT OFF PENELOPE. 470 00:21:10,703 --> 00:21:13,306 I EVEN MANAGED TO SAVE A BIT FOR MOTHER. 471 00:21:13,340 --> 00:21:16,909 OH, AND THAT REMINDS ME, I MUST CALL HER. 472 00:21:16,943 --> 00:21:19,579 TELL HER THAT I'M COMING OVER TOMORROW WITH-- 473 00:21:23,282 --> 00:21:24,283 MOTHER. 474 00:21:30,590 --> 00:21:32,425 [CRYING] 475 00:21:32,459 --> 00:21:33,360 IT'S ALL RIGHT. 476 00:21:35,362 --> 00:21:36,429 I'M HERE. 477 00:21:39,566 --> 00:21:40,567 I LOVE YOU. 478 00:21:44,804 --> 00:21:46,906 COME ON. COME ON. 32766

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