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1
00:07:25,513 --> 00:07:27,973
Hi.
2
00:07:27,974 --> 00:07:29,766
Hey.
3
00:07:29,767 --> 00:07:31,969
How are you?
4
00:07:34,272 --> 00:07:37,475
Didn't we just talk about that?
5
00:07:38,276 --> 00:07:40,819
That was yesterday.
6
00:07:40,820 --> 00:07:43,564
Today is Tuesday.
7
00:07:46,200 --> 00:07:49,153
So I've been here long?
8
00:07:51,122 --> 00:07:53,324
A month.
9
00:07:57,503 --> 00:07:59,497
Wayne says that...
10
00:08:02,050 --> 00:08:04,835
My grief pattern is atypical.
11
00:08:09,474 --> 00:08:11,342
Yeah.
12
00:08:16,564 --> 00:08:19,566
Had a talk with Wayne.
13
00:08:19,567 --> 00:08:23,437
I think he gives you too much medication.
Way too much.
14
00:08:24,489 --> 00:08:26,782
Stop it, please.
15
00:08:26,783 --> 00:08:29,284
Trust others to be smarter than you.
16
00:08:29,285 --> 00:08:31,787
- He's straight out of medical school.
- Just for once.
17
00:08:31,788 --> 00:08:36,200
He doesn't know what he's doing. I've treated
10 times as many patients as he has.
18
00:08:37,293 --> 00:08:39,870
But you're not a doctor.
19
00:08:40,755 --> 00:08:43,090
No, I'm not.
20
00:08:43,091 --> 00:08:46,961
And I'm proud that I'm not
when I meet a doctor like him.
21
00:08:48,513 --> 00:08:52,216
There is nothing atypical
about your grief.
22
00:09:02,693 --> 00:09:05,146
It was my fault.
23
00:09:07,448 --> 00:09:10,867
What about me?
I was there too.
24
00:09:10,868 --> 00:09:13,362
I could have stopped him.
25
00:09:14,205 --> 00:09:15,865
No.
26
00:09:19,001 --> 00:09:23,706
You didn't know that he had
started waking up lately.
27
00:09:27,552 --> 00:09:32,340
I was aware that he would
sometimes wake up...
28
00:09:34,225 --> 00:09:37,269
and crawl out of bed...
29
00:09:37,270 --> 00:09:39,221
and walk about...
30
00:09:40,648 --> 00:09:44,192
just as you thought
that he was soundly asleep.
31
00:09:44,193 --> 00:09:47,396
He could open the baby gate.
32
00:09:49,157 --> 00:09:50,699
He-
33
00:09:50,700 --> 00:09:52,943
He woke up...
34
00:09:55,663 --> 00:09:59,116
and was - was confused and -
35
00:10:01,335 --> 00:10:04,379
And - and alone.
36
00:10:04,380 --> 00:10:06,582
Hey. Hey-
37
00:10:07,717 --> 00:10:09,418
Hey.
38
00:10:30,489 --> 00:10:33,692
Dr. Wayne says
you want me back home.
39
00:10:36,996 --> 00:10:39,122
You couldn't leave it, could you?
40
00:10:39,123 --> 00:10:41,082
Had to meddle.
41
00:10:41,083 --> 00:10:43,585
This place leads nowhere.
42
00:10:43,586 --> 00:10:46,504
On the contrary...
43
00:10:46,505 --> 00:10:48,374
grief -
44
00:10:49,634 --> 00:10:53,220
it's not a disease.
It's a natural, healthy reaction.
45
00:10:53,221 --> 00:10:55,840
You can't just remove it.
You mustn't.
46
00:10:57,558 --> 00:11:00,435
Wayne knows you're a therapist.
47
00:11:00,436 --> 00:11:03,063
He says you shouldn't
treat your own family.
48
00:11:03,064 --> 00:11:06,024
In principle I agree, but -
49
00:11:06,025 --> 00:11:09,979
But you're just so much smarter,
aren't you?
50
00:11:10,821 --> 00:11:12,523
I love you.
51
00:11:15,701 --> 00:11:19,162
Nothing hurts more
than to see the one that you love...
52
00:11:19,163 --> 00:11:22,616
subjected to mistakes and wrongs.
53
00:11:23,751 --> 00:11:27,371
No therapist can know
as much about you as I do.
54
00:13:38,511 --> 00:13:40,220
It's all right.
55
00:13:40,221 --> 00:13:43,924
It hurts.
56
00:13:48,145 --> 00:13:50,472
- It hurts.
- I know.
57
00:13:52,316 --> 00:13:54,518
There's no way around it.
58
00:13:58,739 --> 00:14:00,740
I want to die too.
59
00:14:00,741 --> 00:14:03,944
No, I'm not gonna let you do that.
60
00:14:07,456 --> 00:14:10,041
Will it just go on and on?
61
00:14:10,042 --> 00:14:11,501
No.
62
00:14:11,502 --> 00:14:13,621
No, it'll change.
63
00:14:16,006 --> 00:14:18,334
Will it get any worse?
64
00:14:19,635 --> 00:14:21,587
Yes, it will.
65
00:14:43,451 --> 00:14:46,654
You've always been distant
from me and Nic.
66
00:14:48,622 --> 00:14:53,577
Now that I come to think of it,
very, very distant.
67
00:14:54,920 --> 00:14:56,546
Okay.
68
00:14:56,547 --> 00:15:00,209
Can you give me
some examples of this?
69
00:15:02,678 --> 00:15:06,090
Hell, that's not that difficult
to understand.
70
00:15:09,393 --> 00:15:12,596
Like last summer, for instance.
71
00:15:14,315 --> 00:15:16,892
You were terribly distant
last summer.
72
00:15:18,903 --> 00:15:22,398
As a father and as a husband.
73
00:15:23,282 --> 00:15:27,027
And that was Nic's last summer
you missed out on.
74
00:15:28,078 --> 00:15:29,988
Too bad.
75
00:15:33,751 --> 00:15:36,711
I never interested you...
76
00:15:36,712 --> 00:15:38,630
until now...
77
00:15:38,631 --> 00:15:41,291
that I am your patient.
78
00:15:42,551 --> 00:15:46,846
Perhaps I'm not supposed
to talk about these things.
79
00:15:46,847 --> 00:15:49,800
There's nothing you can't talk about.
80
00:15:52,436 --> 00:15:56,682
You're indifferent to whether
your child is alive or dead.
81
00:16:04,365 --> 00:16:09,403
I bet you have a lot of clever
therapist replies to that, haven't you?
82
00:16:14,833 --> 00:16:16,827
Well, actually...
83
00:16:18,629 --> 00:16:21,130
it was to honor your wish.
84
00:16:21,131 --> 00:16:24,133
You wanted peace to write.
85
00:16:24,134 --> 00:16:26,336
Perhaps I didn't mean it.
86
00:16:27,137 --> 00:16:29,339
What I understood...
87
00:16:30,266 --> 00:16:33,268
is that you wanted to write alone...
88
00:16:33,269 --> 00:16:37,772
that you and Nic were going to go to Eden,
just the two of you.
89
00:16:37,773 --> 00:16:40,768
That way
you could finish your thesis.
90
00:16:43,153 --> 00:16:44,980
But I didn't.
91
00:16:46,282 --> 00:16:48,283
You didn't?
92
00:16:48,284 --> 00:16:49,826
You see?
93
00:16:49,827 --> 00:16:51,869
You didn't even know that.
94
00:16:51,870 --> 00:16:54,247
Why did you give up?
That's not like you.
95
00:16:54,248 --> 00:16:58,793
The whole project
just seemed less important up there.
96
00:16:58,794 --> 00:17:03,840
As you said when I talked to you
about my subject, glib.
97
00:17:03,841 --> 00:17:06,551
I never called your subject glib.
98
00:17:06,552 --> 00:17:09,345
Perhaps you didn't use that word,
but that's what you meant.
99
00:17:09,346 --> 00:17:13,175
And all of a sudden it was glib.
100
00:17:16,145 --> 00:17:18,980
Or even worse,
some - some kind of lie.
101
00:17:18,981 --> 00:17:21,733
I see.
102
00:17:21,734 --> 00:17:23,943
No, you don't see.
103
00:17:23,944 --> 00:17:27,147
You see a lot of things,
but not that.
104
00:18:59,248 --> 00:19:01,783
Inhale on the count of five.
105
00:19:03,669 --> 00:19:06,629
Calmly. Calmly. Just -
106
00:19:06,630 --> 00:19:08,798
Follow me.
Do it with me.
107
00:19:08,799 --> 00:19:10,508
Inhale.
108
00:19:10,509 --> 00:19:13,545
Inhale on the count of five.
109
00:19:14,471 --> 00:19:17,382
Inhale. Two.
110
00:19:20,227 --> 00:19:23,646
Stay with me. Stay with me.
111
00:19:23,647 --> 00:19:25,732
I'm gonna teach you how to breathe.
112
00:19:25,733 --> 00:19:28,234
Inhale.
113
00:19:28,235 --> 00:19:30,945
Two, three, four, five.
114
00:19:30,946 --> 00:19:33,114
Hold.
115
00:19:33,115 --> 00:19:35,658
Two, three, four, five.
116
00:19:35,659 --> 00:19:38,745
Exhale. Two, three, four - Good.
117
00:19:38,746 --> 00:19:40,496
Imagine -
118
00:19:40,497 --> 00:19:44,868
Imagine you're blowing
on your thistle blooms.
119
00:19:45,878 --> 00:19:48,330
Calmly, quietly.
120
00:19:50,132 --> 00:19:53,176
Yes, yes, that's good.
121
00:19:53,177 --> 00:19:55,337
That's good.
122
00:19:58,015 --> 00:19:59,716
That's very good.
123
00:20:00,934 --> 00:20:04,937
I told you there would be a change.
124
00:20:04,938 --> 00:20:08,308
You're still mourning,
but you're in a new phase.
125
00:20:13,947 --> 00:20:16,650
- What phase?
- Anxiety.
126
00:20:18,118 --> 00:20:21,662
- Anxiety?
- Yes.
127
00:20:21,663 --> 00:20:23,865
This is physical.
128
00:20:26,710 --> 00:20:30,463
- It's dangerous.
- No, it's not dangerous.
129
00:20:30,464 --> 00:20:33,583
Just as your grief wasn't dangerous.
130
00:20:34,384 --> 00:20:37,553
The main part of anxiety is physical.
131
00:20:37,554 --> 00:20:41,849
Dizzy spells, dry mouth...
132
00:20:41,850 --> 00:20:44,852
distorted hearing, trembling...
133
00:20:44,853 --> 00:20:49,766
heavy breathing, fast pulse, nausea.
134
00:20:59,952 --> 00:21:01,820
Hey.
135
00:21:02,996 --> 00:21:05,866
Hey. Hey.
136
00:21:07,751 --> 00:21:10,996
Easy.
Never screw your therapist.
137
00:21:11,922 --> 00:21:15,125
No matter how much
your therapist may like it.
138
00:21:16,927 --> 00:21:20,680
I know it distracts you,
but it's - it's not good for us.
139
00:21:20,681 --> 00:21:24,016
Do the breathing.
140
00:21:24,017 --> 00:21:26,219
Hold.
141
00:21:28,355 --> 00:21:30,231
Exhale.
142
00:21:30,232 --> 00:21:32,859
Do you love me?
143
00:21:32,860 --> 00:21:35,062
Yes, I do.
144
00:21:36,113 --> 00:21:37,814
Then help me.
145
00:21:42,286 --> 00:21:44,613
That's what I'm doing.
146
00:21:52,004 --> 00:21:53,754
Exposure.
147
00:21:53,755 --> 00:21:57,258
That's the only thing
that really works.
148
00:21:57,259 --> 00:22:00,803
Everything else is just talk.
149
00:22:00,804 --> 00:22:06,642
You have to have the courage to stay
in the situation that frightens you...
150
00:22:06,643 --> 00:22:10,388
and then you'll learn
that the fear isn't dangerous.
151
00:22:11,607 --> 00:22:15,735
Let's make a list of things
you're afraid of.
152
00:22:15,736 --> 00:22:20,107
At the top,
we put the situation you fear the most.
153
00:22:24,620 --> 00:22:27,614
But I don't know what I'm afraid of.
154
00:22:29,166 --> 00:22:32,369
Just... take your time.
155
00:22:34,588 --> 00:22:36,422
I'm thinking.
156
00:22:36,423 --> 00:22:38,125
Okay.
157
00:22:43,722 --> 00:22:45,966
I'm thinking, uh, but, uh -
158
00:22:48,518 --> 00:22:52,889
Can't I just be afraid
without a definite object?
159
00:23:52,040 --> 00:23:55,167
Hey. No. No! No!
160
00:23:55,168 --> 00:23:58,455
- Calmly.
161
00:24:00,465 --> 00:24:02,334
Oh, God.
162
00:24:13,061 --> 00:24:15,805
No.
163
00:24:38,503 --> 00:24:40,705
This won't do.
164
00:24:44,593 --> 00:24:47,796
Stup - Stupidest thing
I could do to you.
165
00:24:52,517 --> 00:24:57,354
If you can't tell me
what you're afraid of...
166
00:24:57,355 --> 00:25:00,649
maybe it would be easier
for you to tell me...
167
00:25:00,650 --> 00:25:02,610
where you're afraid.
168
00:25:02,611 --> 00:25:05,605
Where would you feel most exposed?
169
00:25:07,115 --> 00:25:10,068
What would be the worst place?
170
00:25:12,621 --> 00:25:14,489
The apartment?
171
00:25:18,502 --> 00:25:20,161
The street?
172
00:25:21,088 --> 00:25:22,998
A store?
173
00:25:25,133 --> 00:25:27,043
The park?
174
00:25:29,888 --> 00:25:32,215
Visiting someone maybe?
175
00:25:43,693 --> 00:25:45,562
The woods.
176
00:25:46,905 --> 00:25:48,898
The woods?
177
00:25:53,507 --> 00:25:54,411
The woods, yes.
178
00:25:54,412 --> 00:25:56,705
It's funny. because...
179
00:25:56,706 --> 00:26:00,327
you were the one that always
wanted to go into the woods.
180
00:26:01,461 --> 00:26:03,830
What scares you about the woods?
181
00:26:04,756 --> 00:26:07,292
What frightens you there?
182
00:26:11,972 --> 00:26:14,049
Everything.
183
00:26:19,020 --> 00:26:23,683
Tell me what you think
is supposed to happen in the woods.
184
00:26:30,657 --> 00:26:32,359
I...
185
00:26:33,827 --> 00:26:36,780
Is it any woods in particular?
186
00:26:43,461 --> 00:26:46,039
- Eden.
- Eden?
187
00:26:51,178 --> 00:26:54,180
Well, what do you say we put...
188
00:26:54,181 --> 00:26:57,474
the garden around Eden...
189
00:26:57,475 --> 00:27:00,303
at the top of the pyramid?
190
00:27:01,479 --> 00:27:03,314
No.
191
00:27:03,315 --> 00:27:05,767
Not quite at the top.
192
00:27:16,036 --> 00:27:18,537
No.
193
00:27:18,538 --> 00:27:21,408
Don't you -
194
00:27:24,794 --> 00:27:27,630
Stop it! Stop -
195
00:27:27,631 --> 00:27:29,958
Okay.
196
00:27:38,975 --> 00:27:40,976
Ow! Ow.
197
00:27:40,977 --> 00:27:43,346
It's...
198
00:27:45,815 --> 00:27:47,942
- It's o-It's okay.
- I'm sorry.
199
00:27:47,943 --> 00:27:50,319
It's all right.
200
00:27:50,320 --> 00:27:53,064
- I don't know -
- Huh.
201
00:28:32,153 --> 00:28:35,356
We can start by
working on your expectations.
202
00:28:36,283 --> 00:28:38,485
Close your eyes.
203
00:28:43,081 --> 00:28:46,075
Feel the seat underneath you.
204
00:28:47,877 --> 00:28:50,872
Feel yourself sinking down into it...
205
00:28:51,881 --> 00:28:54,042
enfolding you.
206
00:28:54,884 --> 00:28:56,961
It's a nice feeling.
207
00:28:58,138 --> 00:29:02,558
What you feel is a pleasant warmth...
208
00:29:02,559 --> 00:29:04,636
and heaviness.
209
00:29:06,146 --> 00:29:08,932
Your breath is deep...
210
00:29:10,567 --> 00:29:12,310
regular...
211
00:29:13,570 --> 00:29:15,271
easy.
212
00:29:16,072 --> 00:29:18,282
Now...
213
00:29:18,283 --> 00:29:20,693
imagine you're at Eden.
214
00:29:22,162 --> 00:29:25,698
Imagine you arrive at Eden
through the woods.
215
00:29:28,626 --> 00:29:31,246
Tell me what you see.
216
00:29:36,468 --> 00:29:38,461
I'm at the bridge.
217
00:29:39,304 --> 00:29:41,172
It's evening.
218
00:29:43,558 --> 00:29:46,636
Almost no birds can be heard.
219
00:29:47,771 --> 00:29:50,807
The water is running without a sound.
220
00:29:53,276 --> 00:29:56,187
Darkness comes early down here.
221
00:29:58,782 --> 00:30:00,984
I walk into it.
222
00:30:13,671 --> 00:30:15,672
The little deers...
223
00:30:15,673 --> 00:30:18,842
are hiding among the ferns...
224
00:30:18,843 --> 00:30:20,878
as usual.
225
00:30:21,888 --> 00:30:24,507
Is it difficult to walk there?
226
00:30:25,642 --> 00:30:27,476
No.
227
00:30:27,477 --> 00:30:29,345
Not really.
228
00:30:30,939 --> 00:30:33,391
In fact, it's almost okay.
229
00:30:42,951 --> 00:30:45,536
In among the trees...
230
00:30:45,537 --> 00:30:47,363
on the slope...
231
00:30:48,331 --> 00:30:51,200
is the old fox hole.
232
00:30:54,838 --> 00:30:57,040
How do you feel there?
233
00:30:59,801 --> 00:31:02,086
I can't really tell.
234
00:31:03,221 --> 00:31:06,257
It should be easy passing...
235
00:31:07,100 --> 00:31:09,101
and yet...
236
00:31:09,102 --> 00:31:12,138
it's like walking through mud.
237
00:31:22,157 --> 00:31:24,359
The trunk is thick
238
00:31:26,911 --> 00:31:29,739
The tree rots so slowly.
239
00:31:31,499 --> 00:31:35,244
It has some strange
kind of personality.
240
00:31:36,463 --> 00:31:38,665
I've always felt that.
241
00:31:44,554 --> 00:31:46,297
Now-
242
00:31:47,682 --> 00:31:51,219
Where are you? Are you -
Are you heading for the cabin?
243
00:31:53,730 --> 00:31:55,682
Yes, I am.
244
00:31:58,735 --> 00:32:01,695
I'm walking up the path...
245
00:32:01,696 --> 00:32:03,697
through the tall grass.
246
00:32:03,698 --> 00:32:05,699
No, don't go in.
247
00:32:05,700 --> 00:32:07,568
Don't go in.
248
00:32:08,703 --> 00:32:11,906
It's the outside you're afraid of.
Now look around.
249
00:32:12,874 --> 00:32:14,450
No.
250
00:32:15,251 --> 00:32:17,453
Lie down on the green.
251
00:32:20,131 --> 00:32:22,132
You want me to lie down?
252
00:32:22,133 --> 00:32:24,669
Lie down on the grass.
253
00:32:27,055 --> 00:32:31,384
- On top of all the plants?
- Y-Yes, lie down on the plants.
254
00:32:45,365 --> 00:32:47,400
Are you lying down?
255
00:32:48,701 --> 00:32:50,570
Yes.
256
00:32:51,704 --> 00:32:53,288
Good.
257
00:32:53,289 --> 00:32:55,992
What is everything like around you?
258
00:32:57,835 --> 00:33:00,170
Green.
259
00:33:00,171 --> 00:33:02,707
It's all very green.
260
00:33:04,842 --> 00:33:06,794
Good.
261
00:33:08,137 --> 00:33:10,882
Now will you do what I ask you?
262
00:33:12,642 --> 00:33:14,476
Yes.
263
00:33:14,477 --> 00:33:17,346
What do you want me to do?
264
00:33:18,648 --> 00:33:20,391
I want you...
265
00:33:21,401 --> 00:33:24,312
to melt into the green.
266
00:33:25,154 --> 00:33:27,531
Don't fight it.
267
00:33:27,532 --> 00:33:31,194
Just turn green.
268
00:33:40,336 --> 00:33:43,664
No matter what happens,
you were there, you did it.
269
00:33:46,009 --> 00:33:48,510
Let fear come if it likes.
270
00:33:48,511 --> 00:33:50,137
Remember...
271
00:33:50,138 --> 00:33:54,175
what the mind can conceive and believe,
it can achieve.
272
00:34:46,736 --> 00:34:48,403
What's wrong?
273
00:34:48,404 --> 00:34:50,314
The ground is burning.
274
00:34:51,199 --> 00:34:53,067
The ground is not burning.
275
00:34:57,580 --> 00:34:59,991
Gotta go.
276
00:35:20,186 --> 00:35:21,937
I want to lie down.
277
00:35:21,938 --> 00:35:24,307
Just for a minute.
278
00:35:26,275 --> 00:35:28,443
Sure.
279
00:35:28,444 --> 00:35:30,646
Yeah, we'll take a rest.
280
00:38:05,226 --> 00:38:07,428
Shouldn't we go on?
281
00:38:13,651 --> 00:38:15,352
Yeah.
282
00:38:17,113 --> 00:38:18,981
Yeah, we should.
283
00:39:27,308 --> 00:39:29,093
Stay.
284
00:39:31,854 --> 00:39:33,889
Stay with it.
285
00:39:38,778 --> 00:39:41,780
I know it hurts. Stay.
286
00:39:41,781 --> 00:39:43,732
Stay in it!
287
00:42:56,058 --> 00:42:58,927
It's just the stupid acorns.
288
00:44:31,570 --> 00:44:33,655
What are you doing?
289
00:44:33,656 --> 00:44:35,357
I'm just -
290
00:44:36,408 --> 00:44:38,409
I'm setting up...
291
00:44:38,410 --> 00:44:40,279
a little exercise.
292
00:44:41,121 --> 00:44:42,664
It's -
293
00:44:42,665 --> 00:44:44,533
It's like a -
294
00:44:45,417 --> 00:44:47,585
It's like a game.
295
00:44:47,586 --> 00:44:50,088
You cheated me yesterday.
296
00:44:50,089 --> 00:44:51,756
Running's no good.
297
00:44:51,757 --> 00:44:54,835
You have to really feel the grass.
298
00:44:55,636 --> 00:44:58,172
I want you to go from this stone...
299
00:44:59,098 --> 00:45:00,966
to this stone.
300
00:45:02,184 --> 00:45:04,560
Pretty scary, huh?
301
00:45:04,561 --> 00:45:06,346
You ready?
302
00:45:07,606 --> 00:45:09,524
Here.
303
00:45:09,525 --> 00:45:11,602
I'll give you a ride.
304
00:45:12,403 --> 00:45:15,439
I'll put you on the first stone.
305
00:45:17,324 --> 00:45:20,118
Stay with it.
306
00:45:20,119 --> 00:45:21,703
Here we go.
307
00:45:21,704 --> 00:45:24,706
Now put your foot down.
I got you. I got you.
308
00:45:24,707 --> 00:45:26,249
I'm right here.
309
00:45:26,250 --> 00:45:29,544
- I can't do this.
- Yes, you can.
310
00:45:29,545 --> 00:45:32,797
You can and you will,
just like I will.
311
00:45:32,798 --> 00:45:34,799
We're gonna walk together.
312
00:45:34,800 --> 00:45:36,801
We're gonna walk together, okay?
313
00:45:36,802 --> 00:45:39,178
Now - All right, now breathe.
314
00:45:39,179 --> 00:45:42,724
Here. You're gonna step off the rock.
315
00:45:42,725 --> 00:45:46,220
You're gonna step on that grass.
Step down.
316
00:45:46,937 --> 00:45:49,230
See? What happened?
Nothing.
317
00:45:49,231 --> 00:45:51,733
Keep breathing. Bre -
Keep breathing.
318
00:45:51,734 --> 00:45:55,361
I've got you.
You're really doing great.
319
00:45:55,362 --> 00:45:57,613
Okay? Keep breathing.
320
00:45:57,614 --> 00:46:00,359
Five, five and five.
321
00:46:03,954 --> 00:46:06,039
We're almost there.
322
00:46:06,040 --> 00:46:09,743
We're almost there.
You're doing great.
323
00:46:10,919 --> 00:46:12,829
You're doing fine.
324
00:46:17,217 --> 00:46:18,968
We're there. See?
We're there.
325
00:46:18,969 --> 00:46:21,421
There you go.
326
00:46:25,017 --> 00:46:27,511
You did it.
327
00:46:30,105 --> 00:46:32,307
You learned something.
328
00:46:33,859 --> 00:46:35,727
Didn't you?
329
00:46:39,782 --> 00:46:41,984
You did beautifully.
330
00:46:43,118 --> 00:46:45,404
You did beautifully.
331
00:47:36,046 --> 00:47:38,749
I miss him so much.
332
00:47:58,527 --> 00:48:01,730
I've been afraid up here before.
333
00:48:02,698 --> 00:48:05,108
Yes, it seems likely.
334
00:48:06,785 --> 00:48:09,821
I just didn't know it was fear.
335
00:48:14,084 --> 00:48:16,461
I became afraid...
336
00:48:16,462 --> 00:48:18,830
and I stopped writing.
337
00:48:20,632 --> 00:48:23,377
What was different the last time?
338
00:48:29,308 --> 00:48:31,218
I heard a sound.
339
00:48:52,206 --> 00:48:55,575
Nic?
340
00:48:57,169 --> 00:48:59,037
Nic!
341
00:49:05,260 --> 00:49:07,129
Nic!
342
00:49:15,646 --> 00:49:18,974
Nic!
343
00:49:21,902 --> 00:49:25,522
Nic!
344
00:50:31,680 --> 00:50:34,341
You didn't hear Nic screaming.
345
00:50:38,020 --> 00:50:39,895
Apparently not.
346
00:50:39,896 --> 00:50:43,357
And because you experienced something
that you couldn't explain rationally...
347
00:50:43,358 --> 00:50:47,270
you placed Eden very high
on the pyramid chart.
348
00:50:51,825 --> 00:50:54,827
Eden was the catalyst
that triggered your fear.
349
00:50:54,828 --> 00:50:57,204
You jumped to conclusions...
350
00:50:57,205 --> 00:51:00,575
and tied the emotional event
with the place.
351
00:51:01,501 --> 00:51:04,920
When you feel threatened,
it's natural to react.
352
00:51:04,921 --> 00:51:08,633
If the danger were real,
your fear would save your life...
353
00:51:08,634 --> 00:51:12,671
because your adrenaline
would be used for fight or flight.
354
00:51:14,222 --> 00:51:17,634
But what you're experiencing is panic,
nothing more.
355
00:51:18,477 --> 00:51:20,679
The scream wasn't real.
356
00:51:31,198 --> 00:51:32,941
Stop!
357
00:51:34,701 --> 00:51:37,445
Cal - Calm...
358
00:51:38,246 --> 00:51:40,615
You shouldn't have come here.
359
00:51:41,416 --> 00:51:43,785
You're just so damn arrogant.
360
00:51:45,837 --> 00:51:48,206
But this may not last.
361
00:51:49,383 --> 00:51:51,710
Ever thought of that?
362
00:52:02,562 --> 00:52:06,641
Oak trees grow to be
hundreds of years old.
363
00:52:07,526 --> 00:52:11,570
They only have to produce
one single tree every hundred years...
364
00:52:11,571 --> 00:52:13,280
in order to propagate.
365
00:52:13,281 --> 00:52:16,117
It may sound banal to you, but...
366
00:52:16,118 --> 00:52:20,655
it was a big thing for me to realize that
when I was up here with Nic.
367
00:52:26,378 --> 00:52:29,664
The acorns fell on the roof then too.
368
00:52:30,924 --> 00:52:34,336
They kept falling and falling...
369
00:52:35,220 --> 00:52:38,423
and dying and dying-
370
00:52:43,520 --> 00:52:45,722
And I understood that...
371
00:52:47,607 --> 00:52:51,436
everything that used to be
beautiful about Eden...
372
00:52:52,320 --> 00:52:54,689
was perhaps hideous.
373
00:52:56,992 --> 00:52:59,493
Now I could hear...
374
00:52:59,494 --> 00:53:02,489
what I couldn't hear before -
375
00:53:04,458 --> 00:53:07,334
the cry of all the things...
376
00:53:07,335 --> 00:53:09,663
that are to die.
377
00:53:13,133 --> 00:53:15,634
That's all...
378
00:53:15,635 --> 00:53:17,545
very touching...
379
00:53:18,346 --> 00:53:20,882
if it was a children's book.
380
00:53:24,186 --> 00:53:26,388
Acorns don't cry.
381
00:53:27,689 --> 00:53:30,524
You know that as well as I do.
382
00:53:30,525 --> 00:53:32,560
That's what fear is.
383
00:53:33,695 --> 00:53:36,940
Your thoughts distort reality...
384
00:53:37,866 --> 00:53:39,901
not the other way around.
385
00:53:46,041 --> 00:53:47,541
Satan's church.
386
00:53:47,542 --> 00:53:49,043
Satan? Jesus!
387
00:53:49,044 --> 00:53:51,538
Nature is Satan's church.
388
00:53:52,798 --> 00:53:55,166
What?
389
00:53:57,469 --> 00:53:59,671
Why, there you have him.
390
00:54:00,847 --> 00:54:02,757
That was his breath.
391
00:54:34,464 --> 00:54:36,166
Nic.
392
00:54:37,133 --> 00:54:40,336
He drifted away from me
the last time.
393
00:54:42,264 --> 00:54:45,474
He was always out and about.
394
00:54:45,475 --> 00:54:49,220
He might have made
more of an effort to be there for me.
395
00:56:53,478 --> 00:56:55,980
You look like you slept well.
396
00:56:55,981 --> 00:56:58,308
Thanks. I did.
397
00:57:04,280 --> 00:57:07,984
I just wanted to say
how happy I am that you're here.
398
00:57:11,413 --> 00:57:13,406
I love you, darling.
399
00:57:22,257 --> 00:57:24,417
Did you have a good sleep?
400
00:57:26,970 --> 00:57:30,757
I've just been having
a lot of crazy dreams.
401
00:57:31,725 --> 00:57:36,270
Dreams are of no interest
to modern psychology.
402
00:57:36,271 --> 00:57:38,147
Freud is dead, isn't he?
403
00:57:38,148 --> 00:57:41,809
Yeah.
404
00:57:58,585 --> 00:58:01,371
- What are you doing?
- Look.
405
00:58:04,090 --> 00:58:06,542
I'm well again.
406
00:58:14,517 --> 00:58:16,344
I'm cured.
407
00:58:18,146 --> 00:58:19,847
You're so clever.
408
00:58:23,234 --> 00:58:25,186
I'm fine.
409
00:58:31,659 --> 00:58:34,862
You can't just be happy for me,
can you?
410
01:00:46,085 --> 01:00:49,997
Chaos... reigns!
411
01:05:08,014 --> 01:05:12,559
Um, I'd like to do one more exercise.
412
01:05:12,560 --> 01:05:14,261
It's like role-playing.
413
01:05:15,938 --> 01:05:19,566
My role is...
414
01:05:19,567 --> 01:05:21,902
all the thoughts
that provoke your fear.
415
01:05:21,903 --> 01:05:25,564
Yours is rational thinking.
416
01:05:30,703 --> 01:05:32,697
I'm nature.
417
01:05:33,498 --> 01:05:36,158
All the things that you call nature.
418
01:05:43,883 --> 01:05:46,293
Okay, Mr. Nature.
419
01:05:48,638 --> 01:05:50,923
What do - What do you want?
420
01:05:54,101 --> 01:05:56,679
To hurt you as much as I can.
421
01:06:02,610 --> 01:06:04,520
How?
422
01:06:05,613 --> 01:06:07,648
How do you think?
423
01:06:14,497 --> 01:06:16,657
By frightening me?
424
01:06:19,835 --> 01:06:21,579
By killing you.
425
01:06:24,131 --> 01:06:26,633
Nature can't harm me.
426
01:06:26,634 --> 01:06:28,760
You're just all the greenery outside.
427
01:06:28,761 --> 01:06:31,380
No. I'm more than that.
428
01:06:33,474 --> 01:06:35,634
I don't understand.
429
01:06:36,811 --> 01:06:40,181
I'm outside, but also...
430
01:06:43,067 --> 01:06:44,351
within.
431
01:06:46,445 --> 01:06:49,823
I'm nature of all human beings.
432
01:06:49,824 --> 01:06:52,109
Oh, that kind of nature.
433
01:06:56,914 --> 01:07:00,000
The kind of nature that causes people...
434
01:07:00,001 --> 01:07:03,169
to do evil things against women?
435
01:07:03,170 --> 01:07:05,171
That's exactly who I am.
436
01:07:05,172 --> 01:07:09,342
That kind of nature interested me a lot...
437
01:07:09,343 --> 01:07:12,012
when I was up here.
438
01:07:12,013 --> 01:07:15,633
That kind of nature
was the subject of my thesis.
439
01:07:18,227 --> 01:07:21,514
But you shouldn't underestimate Eden.
440
01:07:23,858 --> 01:07:26,109
What did Eden do?
441
01:07:26,110 --> 01:07:30,064
I discovered something else
in my material than I expected.
442
01:07:31,991 --> 01:07:34,902
If human nature is evil...
443
01:07:35,703 --> 01:07:40,457
then that goes as well for the nature of -
444
01:07:40,458 --> 01:07:42,576
Of the women.
445
01:07:44,378 --> 01:07:45,795
Female nature.
446
01:07:45,796 --> 01:07:48,916
The nature of all the sisters -
447
01:07:51,052 --> 01:07:55,422
Women do not control their own bodies.
Nature does.
448
01:07:56,891 --> 01:07:59,684
I have it in writing in my books.
449
01:07:59,685 --> 01:08:02,145
The literature
that you used in your research...
450
01:08:02,146 --> 01:08:05,398
was about evil things
committed against women.
451
01:08:05,399 --> 01:08:08,902
But you read it
as proof of the evil of women?
452
01:08:08,903 --> 01:08:11,363
You were supposed to be
critical of those texts.
453
01:08:11,364 --> 01:08:15,492
That was your thesis.
Instead you're embracing it.
454
01:08:15,493 --> 01:08:18,487
Do you - Do you know what you're saying?
455
01:08:19,538 --> 01:08:21,414
Forget it.
456
01:08:21,415 --> 01:08:23,492
I don't know why I said it.
457
01:08:24,585 --> 01:08:27,079
I-I can't work anymore now.
458
01:08:38,599 --> 01:08:41,101
Hit me.
459
01:08:41,102 --> 01:08:44,013
- What?
- Hit me so it hurts.
460
01:08:44,939 --> 01:08:46,231
No.
461
01:08:46,232 --> 01:08:48,942
- Hit me, please!
- No!
462
01:08:48,943 --> 01:08:51,403
I can't stand this!
463
01:08:51,404 --> 01:08:55,024
I don't want to. I don't want to.
464
01:09:06,335 --> 01:09:08,495
Then you don't love me.
465
01:09:11,298 --> 01:09:13,842
Okay.
466
01:09:13,843 --> 01:09:16,003
Maybe I don't love you.
467
01:10:13,444 --> 01:10:16,313
Again. Again.
468
01:10:21,827 --> 01:10:25,823
The sisters from Ratisbon
could start a hailstorm.
469
01:11:09,375 --> 01:11:13,829
I'm not gonna continue this
if you don't listen to me.
470
01:11:14,839 --> 01:11:17,715
Good and evil -
471
01:11:17,716 --> 01:11:19,960
they have nothing to do with therapy.
472
01:11:21,846 --> 01:11:24,430
Do you know how many
innocent women were killed...
473
01:11:24,431 --> 01:11:28,268
in the 16th century alone
just for being women?
474
01:11:28,269 --> 01:11:30,929
I'm sure you do - many.
475
01:11:31,814 --> 01:11:33,974
And not because they were evil.
476
01:11:35,150 --> 01:11:37,235
I know.
477
01:11:37,236 --> 01:11:39,730
It's just sometimes I forget.
478
01:11:42,950 --> 01:11:47,453
The evil you talk about is an obsession.
479
01:11:47,454 --> 01:11:51,958
Obsessions never materialize.
It's a scientific fact.
480
01:11:51,959 --> 01:11:55,837
Anxieties can't trick you into doing things
you wouldn't do otherwise.
481
01:11:55,838 --> 01:11:57,422
It's like hypnotism.
482
01:11:57,423 --> 01:11:59,841
You can't be hypnotized
into doing something...
483
01:11:59,842 --> 01:12:02,302
you wouldn't normally do...
484
01:12:02,303 --> 01:12:04,588
something against your nature.
485
01:12:06,640 --> 01:12:08,391
Do you understand me?
486
01:12:08,392 --> 01:12:10,894
- Yeah, I think so.
- You think so.
487
01:12:10,895 --> 01:12:13,931
Well, you don't have to understand me.
Just trust me.
488
01:12:34,251 --> 01:12:36,920
- What's this?
- It's from the medical officer.
489
01:12:36,921 --> 01:12:39,206
It's a copy of the autopsy report.
490
01:12:42,676 --> 01:12:44,711
The autopsy?
491
01:12:46,347 --> 01:12:49,015
Did they perform an autopsy?
492
01:12:49,016 --> 01:12:51,802
I didn't want to tell you
because you weren't feeling well.
493
01:12:54,021 --> 01:12:57,273
Well, what did they find?
494
01:12:57,274 --> 01:13:01,395
Nothing that would have
any bearing on the case.
495
01:13:02,529 --> 01:13:04,948
“The only abnormality in the victim..."
496
01:13:04,949 --> 01:13:10,487
“is a slight deformity of the bones
in his feet of an earlier date."
497
01:13:12,039 --> 01:13:15,450
"We did not attach
any significance to this.”
498
01:13:29,723 --> 01:13:34,178
Are you aware that you put
Nic's shoes on wrong in this picture?
499
01:13:38,899 --> 01:13:41,393
So I have.
500
01:13:42,611 --> 01:13:44,897
How weird.
501
01:13:46,907 --> 01:13:49,985
Slip of the mind that day.
How weird.
502
01:15:00,773 --> 01:15:02,599
Herself.
503
01:15:03,484 --> 01:15:05,735
Oh!
504
01:15:05,736 --> 01:15:09,113
Bastard!
You're leaving me, aren't you?
505
01:15:09,114 --> 01:15:13,117
You bastard!
506
01:15:13,118 --> 01:15:15,620
- You're leaving me!
- I'm not.
507
01:15:15,621 --> 01:15:18,414
- I'm helping you.
- You're leaving me, aren't you?
508
01:15:18,415 --> 01:15:19,616
No!
509
01:15:34,306 --> 01:15:37,517
- I love you.
- I don't believe you.
510
01:15:37,518 --> 01:15:39,268
I don't believe you!
511
01:15:39,269 --> 01:15:41,930
I don't fucking believe you!
512
01:15:44,441 --> 01:15:46,351
Oh!
513
01:19:41,845 --> 01:19:43,672
Ow!
514
01:20:58,463 --> 01:21:00,582
Where are you?
515
01:21:03,510 --> 01:21:05,545
You bastard!
516
01:21:06,430 --> 01:21:08,131
Where are you?
517
01:21:17,190 --> 01:21:18,892
Where are you?
518
01:21:32,998 --> 01:21:35,200
Where are you?
519
01:21:43,341 --> 01:21:46,044
Where are you?
520
01:21:51,016 --> 01:21:52,884
You bastard!
521
01:22:04,070 --> 01:22:06,398
Where are you?
522
01:22:08,742 --> 01:22:10,860
Where are you?
523
01:22:14,206 --> 01:22:16,366
How dare you leave me!
524
01:22:28,428 --> 01:22:30,714
You said you wanted to help me!
525
01:22:32,057 --> 01:22:34,175
Where are you?
526
01:22:37,604 --> 01:22:39,764
Where are you?
527
01:24:04,691 --> 01:24:06,726
Where are you?
528
01:24:10,947 --> 01:24:12,732
You bastard!
529
01:25:26,773 --> 01:25:30,602
Get out! Get out!
You bastard!
530
01:25:31,861 --> 01:25:33,563
Get out!
531
01:25:35,198 --> 01:25:37,324
You bastard!
532
01:25:37,325 --> 01:25:39,027
Come out!
533
01:25:40,912 --> 01:25:43,114
Come out!
534
01:26:02,809 --> 01:26:04,886
Get out!
535
01:26:06,271 --> 01:26:09,015
You bastard!
536
01:26:10,191 --> 01:26:12,644
Come out!
537
01:27:14,255 --> 01:27:16,249
I'm sorry.
538
01:28:03,888 --> 01:28:07,967
We gotta get this thing off my leg.
539
01:28:30,874 --> 01:28:32,992
I can't find the wrench.
540
01:29:40,109 --> 01:29:42,694
Did you want to kill me?
541
01:29:42,695 --> 01:29:44,939
Not yet.
542
01:29:47,867 --> 01:29:51,203
The three beggars aren't here yet.
543
01:29:51,204 --> 01:29:53,573
The three beggars.
544
01:29:55,124 --> 01:29:57,368
What does that mean?
545
01:29:58,252 --> 01:30:03,416
When the three beggars arrive,
someone must die.
546
01:30:05,677 --> 01:30:07,795
I see.
547
01:30:31,911 --> 01:30:35,448
A crying woman is a scheming woman.
548
01:30:47,051 --> 01:30:50,671
“False in legs, and false in thighs.
549
01:30:52,640 --> 01:30:56,677
False in breast, teeth, hair and eyes.”
550
01:32:53,177 --> 01:32:55,296
Hold me.
551
01:32:59,392 --> 01:33:01,552
Hold me.
552
01:34:28,564 --> 01:34:32,560
There's no such constellation.
553
01:34:59,178 --> 01:35:01,429
But none of it is any use.
554
01:35:01,430 --> 01:35:03,549
None of it is any use.
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01:35:07,812 --> 01:35:10,139
- No!
- No!
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