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1
00:00:03,370 --> 00:00:05,515
Julie, did I ever tell you
about my uncle Malcolm,
2
00:00:05,539 --> 00:00:07,083
the traveling salesman?
3
00:00:07,107 --> 00:00:08,318
No, why don't you?
4
00:00:08,342 --> 00:00:10,286
One time, my uncle
Malcolm is in the Duluth.
5
00:00:10,310 --> 00:00:12,155
Checks out of his
hotel, goes to the train,
6
00:00:12,179 --> 00:00:15,158
and he noticed he left his
umbrella in the hotel room.
7
00:00:15,182 --> 00:00:16,560
Well, what did he do?
8
00:00:16,584 --> 00:00:18,861
He went back to the hotel,
went up to the clerk, he said,
9
00:00:18,885 --> 00:00:21,097
"I'm Malcolm Kotter,
the traveling salesman
10
00:00:21,121 --> 00:00:23,934
and I have left my
umbrella in Room 923."
11
00:00:23,958 --> 00:00:26,502
Okay, what did the clerk say?
12
00:00:26,526 --> 00:00:28,605
Clerk said, "Mr. Kotter,
we just rented that room
13
00:00:28,629 --> 00:00:29,939
to a honeymoon couple.
14
00:00:29,963 --> 00:00:32,041
You wanna go up there
and knock, that's up to you."
15
00:00:32,065 --> 00:00:33,443
Well, what did Uncle Malcolm do?
16
00:00:33,467 --> 00:00:35,378
Uncle Malcolm goes
up to the hotel room,
17
00:00:35,402 --> 00:00:36,847
and he's about to
knock on the door
18
00:00:36,871 --> 00:00:38,615
when he hears
from inside the room,
19
00:00:38,639 --> 00:00:41,017
"Whose little eyes are these?"
20
00:00:41,041 --> 00:00:43,486
"Why, they're yours."
21
00:00:43,510 --> 00:00:45,455
"Whose little nose is this?"
22
00:00:45,479 --> 00:00:47,523
"Why, it's yours."
23
00:00:47,547 --> 00:00:49,659
"Well, whose
little neck is this?"
24
00:00:49,683 --> 00:00:51,194
"Why, it's yours."
25
00:00:51,218 --> 00:00:53,697
Uncle Malcolm knocks
on the door and says,
26
00:00:53,721 --> 00:00:56,254
"Listen, when you get to
the little umbrella, it's mine."
27
00:01:00,427 --> 00:01:02,672
Welcome Back,
Kotter is recorded live
28
00:01:02,696 --> 00:01:05,197
before a studio audience.
29
00:01:12,306 --> 00:01:15,184
♪ Welcome back ♪
30
00:01:15,208 --> 00:01:19,022
♪ Your dreams
Were your ticket out ♪
31
00:01:19,046 --> 00:01:21,191
♪ Welcome back ♪
32
00:01:21,215 --> 00:01:25,928
♪ To that same old place
That you laughed about ♪
33
00:01:25,952 --> 00:01:28,131
♪ Well, the names
Have all changed ♪
34
00:01:28,155 --> 00:01:30,366
♪ Since you hung around ♪
35
00:01:30,390 --> 00:01:32,569
♪ But those dreams
Have remained ♪
36
00:01:32,593 --> 00:01:34,838
♪ And they've turned around ♪
37
00:01:34,862 --> 00:01:37,073
♪ Who'd have thought
They'd lead ya ♪
38
00:01:37,097 --> 00:01:38,775
♪ Who'd have thought
They'd lead ya ♪
39
00:01:38,799 --> 00:01:40,876
♪ Back here where we need ya? ♪
40
00:01:40,900 --> 00:01:42,979
♪ Back here Where we need ya? ♪
41
00:01:43,003 --> 00:01:45,114
♪ Yeah, we tease him a lot ♪
42
00:01:45,138 --> 00:01:47,317
♪ 'Cause we've got
him On the spot ♪
43
00:01:47,341 --> 00:01:49,552
♪ Welcome back ♪
44
00:01:49,576 --> 00:01:51,755
♪ Welcome back Welcome back ♪
45
00:01:51,779 --> 00:01:53,923
♪ Welcome back ♪
46
00:01:53,947 --> 00:01:56,259
♪ Welcome back Welcome back ♪
47
00:01:56,283 --> 00:01:58,650
♪ Welcome back ♪
48
00:02:08,796 --> 00:02:12,175
Okay, in our continuing
unit on the great inventors
49
00:02:12,199 --> 00:02:15,512
today's saga, the story
of Thomas Alva Edison.
50
00:02:15,536 --> 00:02:19,104
The Kotter Repertory Theater
presents a dramatization.
51
00:02:21,441 --> 00:02:24,086
Bravo. Bravo.
52
00:02:24,110 --> 00:02:28,725
Is Thomas Alva Edison at home?
53
00:02:28,749 --> 00:02:31,261
This is Mrs. Edison.
54
00:02:31,285 --> 00:02:34,698
Who shall I say is calling?
55
00:02:34,722 --> 00:02:36,854
It's the devil.
56
00:02:37,991 --> 00:02:41,671
The devil? Did
you say the devil?
57
00:02:41,695 --> 00:02:45,831
Tom. Tom, it's the devil.
58
00:02:47,568 --> 00:02:50,213
Oh, boy. He's here again, huh?
59
00:02:50,237 --> 00:02:54,584
First, he comes 1875.
1876, he shows up.
60
00:02:54,608 --> 00:02:58,187
And now, it's 1877,
he shows up again.
61
00:02:58,211 --> 00:03:00,757
Listen, get lost. I'm
inventing the phonograph.
62
00:03:00,781 --> 00:03:02,621
I don't need you around here.
63
00:03:03,216 --> 00:03:05,261
I don't care about
the phonograph,
64
00:03:05,285 --> 00:03:07,330
I don't care about inventing.
65
00:03:07,354 --> 00:03:12,668
♪ I don't care, I don't care
What peeps think of me ♪
66
00:03:12,692 --> 00:03:16,739
♪ I'm happy-go-lucky
Why some say I'm plucky ♪
67
00:03:16,763 --> 00:03:19,442
Tom, forget about inventing.
Come out with me tonight.
68
00:03:19,466 --> 00:03:20,610
We'll go to a discotheque,
69
00:03:20,634 --> 00:03:24,213
see some go-go
girls, what do ya say?
70
00:03:24,237 --> 00:03:25,681
Get killed with
your go-go girls.
71
00:03:25,705 --> 00:03:27,550
I'm inventing a phonograph.
72
00:03:27,574 --> 00:03:29,819
I don't care, because
if I don't invent it,
73
00:03:29,843 --> 00:03:32,389
my Stevie Wonder albums
won't be worth a nickel.
74
00:03:32,413 --> 00:03:33,422
♪ Da, da, da ♪
75
00:03:37,217 --> 00:03:39,162
Oh! Oh, oh! Oh!
76
00:03:39,186 --> 00:03:40,630
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
77
00:03:40,654 --> 00:03:42,565
Arnold, Arnold.
78
00:03:42,589 --> 00:03:46,891
That was very
impressive, Mr. Kotter.
79
00:03:48,862 --> 00:03:50,907
Yes, yes. Never in
this reviewer's memory
80
00:03:50,931 --> 00:03:53,509
has he seen a better
classroom dramatization.
81
00:03:53,533 --> 00:03:57,747
Um, I-I give you four stars.
82
00:03:57,771 --> 00:03:59,949
All right. Well, we'll see
how many stars I give it.
83
00:03:59,973 --> 00:04:02,519
Epstein, who invented
the phonograph?
84
00:04:02,543 --> 00:04:03,954
Uh, let's see, uh,
85
00:04:03,978 --> 00:04:06,556
Thomas Alva Edison
invented the phonograph, right?
86
00:04:06,580 --> 00:04:09,125
In, uh, 1877.
87
00:04:09,149 --> 00:04:11,561
Right after he wouldn't
go boogying with the devil.
88
00:04:11,585 --> 00:04:12,585
Say, hey, hey. Yeah.
89
00:04:14,688 --> 00:04:16,432
Okay, now, forget
about the devil.
90
00:04:16,456 --> 00:04:18,635
Thomas Al... Kotter.
91
00:04:18,659 --> 00:04:21,838
Kotter, the board has advised
me they'd be happy to see
92
00:04:21,862 --> 00:04:25,007
some of your Sweathogs
promoted to regular classes.
93
00:04:25,031 --> 00:04:27,744
I, uh, checked the records,
and I was astonished to see
94
00:04:27,768 --> 00:04:31,547
that, uh, one of your menagerie
has made considerable progress
95
00:04:31,571 --> 00:04:34,250
and is now deemed promotable.
96
00:04:34,274 --> 00:04:36,841
Welcome to the real world...
97
00:04:39,779 --> 00:04:41,380
Arnold Horshack.
98
00:04:45,451 --> 00:04:46,929
Horshack.
99
00:04:46,953 --> 00:04:49,433
Hey, did you hear that Arnold?
100
00:04:52,493 --> 00:04:53,469
He heard.
101
00:04:53,493 --> 00:04:55,213
You killed him.
102
00:04:55,929 --> 00:04:57,173
Arnold, come on, wake up.
103
00:04:57,197 --> 00:04:59,242
Arnold, this is the biggest
moment of your life,
104
00:04:59,266 --> 00:05:01,077
don't sleep through it.
105
00:05:01,101 --> 00:05:04,814
Arnold, quick. Give
me a "Oh, oh, oh."
106
00:05:04,838 --> 00:05:06,082
He's coming to.
107
00:05:06,106 --> 00:05:07,517
What was that name again?
108
00:05:07,541 --> 00:05:09,185
Horshack. Arnold Horshack.
109
00:05:13,980 --> 00:05:16,826
Goodbye, gang.
110
00:05:16,850 --> 00:05:19,195
Goodbye, Mr. Kotter.
111
00:05:19,219 --> 00:05:20,996
It was great fun,
112
00:05:21,020 --> 00:05:24,967
but it was just
one of those things.
113
00:05:24,991 --> 00:05:26,769
Good luck, Arnold. Good luck.
114
00:05:26,793 --> 00:05:30,339
Oh, please, Mr. Kotter!
115
00:05:30,363 --> 00:05:33,209
Tell Mr. Woodman it's a mistake.
116
00:05:33,233 --> 00:05:35,367
Kotter, let that boy go.
117
00:05:37,671 --> 00:05:39,315
Arnold, let go. Arnold...
118
00:05:39,339 --> 00:05:43,018
Arnold, I cannot go through
life with you attached to my leg.
119
00:05:43,042 --> 00:05:45,154
This is not a mistake,
it's not a mistake.
120
00:05:45,178 --> 00:05:47,924
One of my Sweathogs
is moving up in world.
121
00:05:47,948 --> 00:05:49,692
This boy down there is a symbol
122
00:05:49,716 --> 00:05:52,995
that Gabe Kotter is
succeeding as a teacher.
123
00:05:53,019 --> 00:05:56,766
Arnold, I give you the
farewell Sweathog salute.
124
00:05:56,790 --> 00:05:59,835
Up your nose with a rubber hose.
125
00:05:59,859 --> 00:06:02,271
Good luck in the
real world, Arnold.
126
00:06:02,295 --> 00:06:06,064
Oh, sometimes,
this job is a real drag.
127
00:06:12,839 --> 00:06:15,084
Hey, come on,
isn't that terrific?
128
00:06:15,108 --> 00:06:17,520
Mr. Kotter...
129
00:06:17,544 --> 00:06:20,090
Horshack won't be able
to survive in the real world.
130
00:06:20,114 --> 00:06:21,691
I mean, he's special.
131
00:06:21,715 --> 00:06:24,348
You can't put him
with real people.
132
00:06:28,622 --> 00:06:31,033
Oh, boy. Am I glad
to see you guys.
133
00:06:31,057 --> 00:06:33,502
Was I homesick.
134
00:06:33,526 --> 00:06:34,771
Homesick?
135
00:06:34,795 --> 00:06:36,872
You ain't even been gone yet.
136
00:06:36,896 --> 00:06:40,809
Freddie, you don't know
what a regular class is like.
137
00:06:40,833 --> 00:06:46,282
No jokes, no costumes,
no impressions and...
138
00:06:46,306 --> 00:06:48,517
And when I do my
laugh, you know.
139
00:06:50,744 --> 00:06:52,889
The kids won't laugh with me.
140
00:06:52,913 --> 00:06:55,758
They laugh at me.
141
00:06:55,782 --> 00:06:57,526
Hey, look, Horshack.
142
00:06:57,550 --> 00:06:59,795
Uh, why don't you go talk
to Kotter about it, you know.
143
00:06:59,819 --> 00:07:01,898
Like, he's pretty good
about this kind of thing.
144
00:07:01,922 --> 00:07:03,733
Epstein, you do
not seem to realize
145
00:07:03,757 --> 00:07:07,269
that I am Mr. Kotter's symbol
of being a good teacher.
146
00:07:07,293 --> 00:07:09,305
If I go to him, he'll
think he's a bad teacher.
147
00:07:09,329 --> 00:07:10,907
And how can he think
he's a bad teacher
148
00:07:10,931 --> 00:07:14,098
if I am a symbol of him
being a good teacher.
149
00:07:15,868 --> 00:07:18,715
Well, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
150
00:07:18,739 --> 00:07:20,850
Hey, Arnold. You know, I...
151
00:07:20,874 --> 00:07:24,620
I ain't never knew
you was... smart.
152
00:07:24,644 --> 00:07:26,089
Hey, that's it.
153
00:07:26,113 --> 00:07:27,690
Arnold, that got it.
154
00:07:27,714 --> 00:07:30,460
Look, all you gotta do to
get back in that classroom
155
00:07:30,484 --> 00:07:32,028
is to act dumb.
156
00:07:32,052 --> 00:07:35,898
Quick thinking, Vinnie.
157
00:07:35,922 --> 00:07:37,834
But I'd rather not
have to act dumb.
158
00:07:37,858 --> 00:07:40,258
It's something that's gotta
come natural, you know?
159
00:07:41,495 --> 00:07:44,929
Arnold. Oh, Arnold. Look at me.
160
00:07:47,400 --> 00:07:49,545
It's easy acting dumb.
161
00:07:49,569 --> 00:07:51,903
I do it all the time.
162
00:07:52,773 --> 00:07:54,805
I know, Vinnie.
163
00:07:56,610 --> 00:07:59,010
And you're very good at it.
164
00:08:00,747 --> 00:08:02,080
What?
165
00:08:03,149 --> 00:08:05,595
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
166
00:08:05,619 --> 00:08:06,996
Horshack, if ya ask me,
167
00:08:07,020 --> 00:08:08,998
there's only one way
out of this thing, right?
168
00:08:09,022 --> 00:08:10,499
You gotta get
yourself in trouble.
169
00:08:10,523 --> 00:08:11,501
Right. Yeah.
170
00:08:11,525 --> 00:08:12,535
Now, dig.
171
00:08:12,559 --> 00:08:13,803
Speaking as an expert,
172
00:08:13,827 --> 00:08:16,072
trouble is the way to go
to getting yourself noticed.
173
00:08:16,096 --> 00:08:18,074
Right. And for
getting in trouble
174
00:08:18,098 --> 00:08:20,343
you have come to
right man, my friend.
175
00:08:20,367 --> 00:08:22,712
Now, I can get
just you in trouble,
176
00:08:22,736 --> 00:08:24,180
or I can offer the family plan
177
00:08:24,204 --> 00:08:26,537
and get your whole
family in trouble.
178
00:08:29,042 --> 00:08:30,186
All right, guys.
179
00:08:30,210 --> 00:08:31,554
I hate to break up this reunion,
180
00:08:31,578 --> 00:08:33,656
but I think Arnold's gotta
go and make new friends
181
00:08:33,680 --> 00:08:35,058
with his new classmates.
182
00:08:35,082 --> 00:08:36,082
How?
183
00:08:37,417 --> 00:08:38,861
Just walk up to them, you say,
184
00:08:38,885 --> 00:08:40,196
"Hey, I'm Arnold Horshack.
185
00:08:40,220 --> 00:08:43,233
Why don't you come up
and see my lunchbox?"
186
00:08:43,257 --> 00:08:44,867
Don't worry about
nothing, ya hear?
187
00:08:44,891 --> 00:08:46,202
We got ya covered, man.
188
00:08:46,226 --> 00:08:47,737
Shalom, amigo.
189
00:08:47,761 --> 00:08:49,394
Go get 'em.
190
00:08:51,264 --> 00:08:52,574
Has it occurred to any of you
191
00:08:52,598 --> 00:08:55,545
that by trying to help
Horshack you're hurting him?
192
00:08:55,569 --> 00:08:57,580
You're not giving him a
chance to prove himself
193
00:08:57,604 --> 00:08:59,282
outside the Sweathogs.
194
00:08:59,306 --> 00:09:01,984
You gotta let him try
and make new friends.
195
00:09:02,008 --> 00:09:03,919
Something wrong
with his old friends?
196
00:09:03,943 --> 00:09:05,121
Yeah.
197
00:09:05,145 --> 00:09:08,046
You couldn't give
friends like us away.
198
00:09:10,584 --> 00:09:13,395
You got a point there, Epstein.
199
00:09:13,419 --> 00:09:16,499
Look, I mean, if
Benjamin Franklin's wife
200
00:09:16,523 --> 00:09:18,234
didn't tell him to go fly a kite
201
00:09:18,258 --> 00:09:20,603
we'd all be standing
here in the dark.
202
00:09:20,627 --> 00:09:24,106
Napoleon would be
just another short person.
203
00:09:24,130 --> 00:09:26,008
Abe Lincoln wouldn't
have been president.
204
00:09:26,032 --> 00:09:28,766
There'd be some
stranger on a five-dollar bill.
205
00:09:30,136 --> 00:09:32,615
If you really care
about Horshack...
206
00:09:32,639 --> 00:09:34,650
I mean, really care about him.
207
00:09:34,674 --> 00:09:36,853
You gotta let him go.
208
00:09:36,877 --> 00:09:38,309
Trust me.
209
00:09:39,813 --> 00:09:40,990
Hey, look, uh,
210
00:09:41,014 --> 00:09:42,659
I don't wanna hurt
Horshack, you know?
211
00:09:42,683 --> 00:09:45,160
Yeah, he's our friend.
212
00:09:45,184 --> 00:09:47,096
Yeah, I mean, I'm
not gonna be the guy
213
00:09:47,120 --> 00:09:49,832
that stops Horshack
from being president.
214
00:09:49,856 --> 00:09:53,202
I mean, if the people want him.
215
00:09:53,226 --> 00:09:54,670
Hey, hey.
216
00:09:54,694 --> 00:09:56,973
I got all the way to my
new class when I realized
217
00:09:56,997 --> 00:09:59,441
I don't wanna make new friends.
218
00:09:59,465 --> 00:10:02,533
So I'm available.
219
00:10:04,037 --> 00:10:07,349
So, what's everybody
planning on doing?
220
00:10:07,373 --> 00:10:08,651
Well, in a couple of minutes,
221
00:10:08,675 --> 00:10:10,253
I gotta go over to
Ben Franklin Hotel.
222
00:10:10,277 --> 00:10:11,821
I'm gonna meet a
friend of mine there
223
00:10:11,845 --> 00:10:12,988
in the Abe Lincoln Room,
224
00:10:13,012 --> 00:10:15,046
and I think I'll
have a Napoleon.
225
00:10:16,716 --> 00:10:18,449
Good.
226
00:10:20,820 --> 00:10:22,030
Ar... Arnold. Arnold.
227
00:10:22,054 --> 00:10:24,021
Oh, you see, um...
228
00:10:26,192 --> 00:10:27,736
See, Arnold, like, um...
229
00:10:27,760 --> 00:10:31,273
See, I-I-I got... I got
basketball practice.
230
00:10:31,297 --> 00:10:32,508
See, and like, um...
231
00:10:32,532 --> 00:10:34,277
Like, I'm gonna see you later.
232
00:10:34,301 --> 00:10:35,645
Check you all later.
233
00:10:35,669 --> 00:10:36,645
Bye-bye.
234
00:10:36,669 --> 00:10:38,947
Hey, Juan, you wanna
play a trick on me?
235
00:10:38,971 --> 00:10:42,018
I'm open to anything.
236
00:10:42,042 --> 00:10:44,453
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
237
00:10:44,477 --> 00:10:46,377
I'd love to, man.
238
00:10:48,882 --> 00:10:52,584
But I gotta go... study.
239
00:10:57,523 --> 00:11:01,036
Well, I guess that leaves
you and me, huh, Vinnie?
240
00:11:01,060 --> 00:11:03,460
Yeah, that's right.
241
00:11:05,765 --> 00:11:08,177
Arnold, you wouldn't believe it.
242
00:11:08,201 --> 00:11:10,813
I get this phone call, right?
243
00:11:10,837 --> 00:11:12,882
Bonzo Maredy.
244
00:11:12,906 --> 00:11:14,784
I haven't seen him for years.
245
00:11:14,808 --> 00:11:17,019
He says to me, "Hey,
Vinnie, we gotta get together,
246
00:11:17,043 --> 00:11:18,220
do some business."
247
00:11:18,244 --> 00:11:20,222
I said, Bonzo, now?
248
00:11:20,246 --> 00:11:21,857
He says, "Yeah, now."
249
00:11:21,881 --> 00:11:23,959
Bing, bang, bong.
250
00:11:23,983 --> 00:11:25,761
I'm stuck in a corner.
251
00:11:25,785 --> 00:11:27,318
I gotta go, Arnold.
252
00:11:31,825 --> 00:11:33,892
I'm sorry.
253
00:11:36,562 --> 00:11:37,740
Well, Arnold.
254
00:11:37,764 --> 00:11:39,208
I'm really proud
of you, you know.
255
00:11:39,232 --> 00:11:40,542
We all are.
256
00:11:40,566 --> 00:11:42,211
You made it out
of the Sweathogs.
257
00:11:42,235 --> 00:11:43,578
I'm gonna see you around, huh.
258
00:11:43,602 --> 00:11:45,281
Symbol.
259
00:11:45,305 --> 00:11:47,883
♪ Welcome back ♪
260
00:11:47,907 --> 00:11:51,242
♪ Your dreams Were
your ticket out... ♪
261
00:11:57,984 --> 00:11:59,795
Heat.
262
00:11:59,819 --> 00:12:03,465
Send up heat.
263
00:12:03,489 --> 00:12:05,534
Why are you talking
to that radiator?
264
00:12:05,558 --> 00:12:08,604
You know that that
radiator doesn't listen.
265
00:12:08,628 --> 00:12:10,706
Why don't you try
talking to the oven?
266
00:12:10,730 --> 00:12:14,376
Because, the oven is food heat.
267
00:12:14,400 --> 00:12:18,113
The radiator is people heat.
268
00:12:18,137 --> 00:12:21,216
What about if we get together
and generate a little body heat?
269
00:12:21,240 --> 00:12:24,286
Oh, that's a terrific idea.
270
00:12:24,310 --> 00:12:29,024
But first, you stop
pretending that you're not cold.
271
00:12:29,048 --> 00:12:31,627
And you go downstairs
and talk to the super.
272
00:12:31,651 --> 00:12:34,596
I'm not cold. You're
the one that's cold.
273
00:12:34,620 --> 00:12:37,299
So why don't you go
talk to Mr. Schmeiler?
274
00:12:37,323 --> 00:12:39,368
You would like me, your wife,
275
00:12:39,392 --> 00:12:41,270
to go down to the
basement alone.
276
00:12:42,462 --> 00:12:44,841
There are things
in the basement.
277
00:12:44,865 --> 00:12:47,331
Large, hairy things.
278
00:12:49,402 --> 00:12:52,403
Well, let's not discuss
Mrs. Schmeiler.
279
00:12:54,974 --> 00:12:57,920
Look, I do not want to
go see Mr. Schmeiler.
280
00:12:57,944 --> 00:13:00,656
Mr. Schmeiler happens
to be a very mean man.
281
00:13:00,680 --> 00:13:04,226
Okay, just remember...
282
00:13:04,250 --> 00:13:07,451
body heat rests
on your decision.
283
00:13:09,089 --> 00:13:10,221
That's blackmail.
284
00:13:10,991 --> 00:13:12,256
You got it.
285
00:13:15,762 --> 00:13:17,728
Blackmail. Mm-hm.
286
00:13:24,470 --> 00:13:25,990
Arnold!
287
00:13:26,839 --> 00:13:28,472
What are you doing here?
288
00:13:30,009 --> 00:13:31,753
I said, what are you doing here?
289
00:13:31,777 --> 00:13:33,356
Hello, Mrs. Kotter,
290
00:13:33,380 --> 00:13:35,624
I gotta talk to you alone.
291
00:13:35,648 --> 00:13:37,826
Well, how did you know
that I would be alone, Arnold?
292
00:13:37,850 --> 00:13:40,396
Oh, see, I'm the one
who turned down the heat.
293
00:13:44,190 --> 00:13:46,135
Come on, Arnold. Sit down.
294
00:13:46,159 --> 00:13:49,605
Mrs. Kotter, I got a
favor to "aks" of you.
295
00:13:49,629 --> 00:13:52,008
Aks, Arnold. Aks.
296
00:13:52,032 --> 00:13:55,478
Mrs. Kotter, do you
think that you could use
297
00:13:55,502 --> 00:13:58,948
your multi-faceted female charms
298
00:13:58,972 --> 00:14:01,384
to get Mr. Kotter
to like me again?
299
00:14:01,408 --> 00:14:04,353
Mr. Kotter likes you, Arnold.
300
00:14:04,377 --> 00:14:06,389
Arnold, you should be proud.
301
00:14:06,413 --> 00:14:08,357
Just think of the
example that you're setting
302
00:14:08,381 --> 00:14:09,658
for all the other Sweathogs.
303
00:14:09,682 --> 00:14:12,094
Ha! to that, Mrs. Kotter.
304
00:14:12,118 --> 00:14:13,128
Ha, ha.
305
00:14:13,152 --> 00:14:15,052
Ha, ha, ha, ha.
306
00:14:16,356 --> 00:14:18,100
Ah, Mrs. Kotter.
307
00:14:18,124 --> 00:14:21,804
See, that's not what they
want me or need me for.
308
00:14:21,828 --> 00:14:25,207
See, Vinnie. Vinnie needs me
so that he could feel important,
309
00:14:25,231 --> 00:14:26,342
you know?
310
00:14:26,366 --> 00:14:28,210
And... And Juan needs me
311
00:14:28,234 --> 00:14:31,013
so that he could feel strong.
312
00:14:31,037 --> 00:14:34,016
And... And... And
Freddie needs me...
313
00:14:34,040 --> 00:14:37,052
I don't know why
Freddie needs me.
314
00:14:37,076 --> 00:14:38,921
But you never know
when he might need me.
315
00:14:41,447 --> 00:14:43,392
Hey, Mrs. Kotter,
316
00:14:43,416 --> 00:14:46,328
do you think it's
unmanly to cry?
317
00:14:46,352 --> 00:14:48,530
Oh, no, Arnold, of course not.
318
00:14:57,296 --> 00:14:59,108
Am I crazy?
319
00:14:59,132 --> 00:15:01,443
Or do I see Arnold Horshack
320
00:15:01,467 --> 00:15:03,601
nestled to my wife's bosom?
321
00:15:07,473 --> 00:15:09,885
Do not get the wrong
idea, Mr. Kotter.
322
00:15:09,909 --> 00:15:13,043
This is not one of
them kinky scenes.
323
00:15:19,519 --> 00:15:22,732
Uh, Julie, I know that you
was trying to keep warm,
324
00:15:22,756 --> 00:15:25,901
but this is
absolutely ridiculous.
325
00:15:25,925 --> 00:15:27,202
The heat's on.
326
00:15:27,226 --> 00:15:28,571
Oh, good.
327
00:15:28,595 --> 00:15:29,571
Excuse me, Arnold.
328
00:15:29,595 --> 00:15:31,173
I'm gonna go sit
on the radiator.
329
00:15:31,197 --> 00:15:32,874
Go ahead, go ahead.
330
00:15:32,898 --> 00:15:35,444
Okay, Mr. Kinky, what's up?
331
00:15:35,468 --> 00:15:37,947
Oh, hey, I just
come by to tell you
332
00:15:37,971 --> 00:15:40,649
how great things
is going for me.
333
00:15:40,673 --> 00:15:44,086
I sure am one happy
symbol of good teaching.
334
00:15:45,111 --> 00:15:48,758
Happy, happy,
happy. Happy, happy.
335
00:15:48,782 --> 00:15:51,327
Oh, by the way, Mrs. Kotter,
that thing we was talking about?
336
00:15:51,351 --> 00:15:52,962
Yeah? If you do not help me,
337
00:15:52,986 --> 00:15:55,297
I am gonna throw myself
off of the highest mountain
338
00:15:55,321 --> 00:15:56,601
in Brooklyn.
339
00:15:57,891 --> 00:15:59,857
And when they find me...
340
00:16:00,893 --> 00:16:03,472
If they find me.
341
00:16:03,496 --> 00:16:07,543
They'll never know who I was.
342
00:16:07,567 --> 00:16:10,701
John Doe... Horshack.
343
00:16:12,004 --> 00:16:15,372
A Slavic legend in his own time.
344
00:16:24,150 --> 00:16:26,195
Call it a sixth sense, Julie,
345
00:16:26,219 --> 00:16:29,220
but I get the feeling that
something is bugging him.
346
00:16:30,656 --> 00:16:31,856
Wha...?
347
00:16:32,758 --> 00:16:36,204
Something is bugging him?
348
00:16:36,228 --> 00:16:37,973
The poor kid is miserable,
349
00:16:37,997 --> 00:16:40,642
and he is not gonna learn
anything in that new class
350
00:16:40,666 --> 00:16:42,711
if he doesn't wanna be there.
351
00:16:42,735 --> 00:16:43,912
You're right.
352
00:16:43,936 --> 00:16:45,247
Let me put it up, just halfway.
353
00:16:45,271 --> 00:16:47,750
What are you doing?
354
00:16:47,774 --> 00:16:50,152
Halfway, compromise, huh?
355
00:16:50,176 --> 00:16:51,553
You're right, I was wrong.
356
00:16:51,577 --> 00:16:54,678
Horshack only started to do
good because he felt he belonged.
357
00:16:59,185 --> 00:17:00,829
How you doing?
358
00:17:00,853 --> 00:17:02,564
What's hanging? Hi, there.
359
00:17:02,588 --> 00:17:04,032
Hey. You know what I'm gonna do?
360
00:17:04,056 --> 00:17:05,734
I'm gonna tell you
what I'm gonna do.
361
00:17:05,758 --> 00:17:08,971
I'm gonna put a
door on my window.
362
00:17:08,995 --> 00:17:10,906
That way, you'll
come through the door.
363
00:17:10,930 --> 00:17:12,608
You know something?
364
00:17:12,632 --> 00:17:13,976
It's cold in here.
365
00:17:14,000 --> 00:17:15,010
Yeah.
366
00:17:15,034 --> 00:17:17,401
You could freeze
off your fandangos.
367
00:17:20,139 --> 00:17:22,818
Okay, look, Mr. Kotter, we
come on a mission of mercy.
368
00:17:22,842 --> 00:17:24,519
Yeah. Man, we wanna know
369
00:17:24,543 --> 00:17:27,189
if we can stop being
mean to Horshack yet.
370
00:17:27,213 --> 00:17:29,425
Yeah, I was thinking about that.
371
00:17:29,449 --> 00:17:32,828
I was wrong, you
guys were right.
372
00:17:32,852 --> 00:17:36,064
Horshack definitely
belongs with the Sweathogs.
373
00:17:36,088 --> 00:17:37,066
All right. All right.
374
00:17:37,090 --> 00:17:38,400
I'll go talk to Mr. Woodman.
375
00:17:38,424 --> 00:17:40,603
I'll explain the entire
thing to him rationally,
376
00:17:40,627 --> 00:17:42,960
and I'm sure he'll understand.
377
00:17:43,796 --> 00:17:45,374
Hey, hey, Mr. Kotter,
378
00:17:45,398 --> 00:17:47,509
now, you don't believe
that now, do you?
379
00:17:47,533 --> 00:17:49,578
I mean, why don't we...
380
00:17:49,602 --> 00:17:53,148
sort of con Mr. Woodman
into giving us Horshack back.
381
00:17:53,172 --> 00:17:54,516
You wanna con him? Yeah.
382
00:17:54,540 --> 00:17:55,651
What are you gonna do?
383
00:17:55,675 --> 00:17:58,921
Trap him in a motel
room with a cheerleader?
384
00:17:58,945 --> 00:18:00,155
Well, you know what we mean.
385
00:18:00,179 --> 00:18:02,090
Like the way you
con us in class.
386
00:18:02,114 --> 00:18:04,560
You know, the way
you dramatize to...
387
00:18:04,584 --> 00:18:06,362
To sneak your
point across, I know.
388
00:18:06,386 --> 00:18:09,097
Yeah. Yeah, you see we
thought we'd put on a little play
389
00:18:09,121 --> 00:18:10,566
for old Woodman, you know.
390
00:18:10,590 --> 00:18:13,068
Sort of convince him
to see things our way.
391
00:18:13,092 --> 00:18:14,903
Yeah. VERNAJEAN: Mm-hm.
392
00:18:14,927 --> 00:18:17,606
Right this way,
Mr. First-nighter.
393
00:18:17,630 --> 00:18:20,943
Front row center,
Mr. First-nighter.
394
00:18:20,967 --> 00:18:25,803
For your comfort,
a-mister, a-first, a-nighter.
395
00:18:27,340 --> 00:18:29,685
What...? What do you
people think you're doing?
396
00:18:29,709 --> 00:18:30,886
This, Mr. Woodman,
397
00:18:30,910 --> 00:18:32,754
is a dramatization,
a little play.
398
00:18:32,778 --> 00:18:35,590
Just pretend you're spending
an evening at a theater.
399
00:18:35,614 --> 00:18:37,192
I hate the theater, Kotter.
400
00:18:37,216 --> 00:18:39,984
Last time I went to a play
they robbed my house.
401
00:18:41,454 --> 00:18:42,886
Shh, shh!
402
00:18:44,089 --> 00:18:48,003
Presenting the
little Sweathogs in...
403
00:18:48,027 --> 00:18:51,228
Come Back, Little
Arnold. Take 1.
404
00:19:00,306 --> 00:19:02,451
Boy...
405
00:19:02,475 --> 00:19:04,719
without Horshack's
calming influence,
406
00:19:04,743 --> 00:19:06,821
I really feel mean.
407
00:19:11,917 --> 00:19:15,620
And I think I'll go
out and bite a tree.
408
00:19:17,123 --> 00:19:18,555
Ow!
409
00:19:19,725 --> 00:19:23,071
Oh, woe is me and begorra.
410
00:19:23,095 --> 00:19:25,395
Where is Horshack,
411
00:19:26,332 --> 00:19:27,509
the little chap
412
00:19:27,533 --> 00:19:30,401
who adds a note of
laughter to me life?
413
00:19:32,172 --> 00:19:33,715
Look.
414
00:19:33,739 --> 00:19:35,706
Here comes Horshack now.
415
00:19:52,291 --> 00:19:56,838
Hello. How are ya?
416
00:19:56,862 --> 00:19:58,640
I'm Arnold Horshack.
417
00:20:04,136 --> 00:20:07,716
Horshack, you have returned.
418
00:20:07,740 --> 00:20:09,851
Our life had lost all meaning
419
00:20:09,875 --> 00:20:12,187
without our little
friend, Horshack,
420
00:20:12,211 --> 00:20:13,621
to lend a helping hand.
421
00:20:13,645 --> 00:20:15,123
Here, Vinnie.
422
00:20:15,147 --> 00:20:17,180
Here's my helping hand.
423
00:20:29,895 --> 00:20:32,207
Ooh, ooh, ooh.
424
00:20:32,231 --> 00:20:37,446
Ooh, ooh, ooh. Ooh.
425
00:20:37,470 --> 00:20:38,903
Ooh.
426
00:20:45,377 --> 00:20:48,045
I don't got no mustache.
427
00:20:49,448 --> 00:20:52,516
Mr. Woodman, what is
going on here, please?
428
00:20:54,720 --> 00:20:58,166
Don't ask me, I'm
Mr. First-nighter.
429
00:20:58,190 --> 00:21:01,303
Arnold, we were acting.
Actually, we were overacting.
430
00:21:01,327 --> 00:21:03,138
But we're just trying
to show Mr. Woodman
431
00:21:03,162 --> 00:21:05,607
how much we care about you.
432
00:21:05,631 --> 00:21:07,375
Do you guys really mean that?
433
00:21:07,399 --> 00:21:09,411
Hey, look, Horshack, you know,
434
00:21:09,435 --> 00:21:12,648
we kid around a lot, right?
435
00:21:12,672 --> 00:21:14,483
But we really missed you.
436
00:21:14,507 --> 00:21:16,051
Yeah.
437
00:21:16,075 --> 00:21:18,486
You know, I never really
thought I would miss you, but...
438
00:21:18,510 --> 00:21:20,722
ah, you sort of grow on a guy.
439
00:21:20,746 --> 00:21:22,813
Like mold.
440
00:21:25,884 --> 00:21:28,196
Ah, thank you, Freddie.
441
00:21:28,220 --> 00:21:30,766
Hey, I miss you guys so much.
442
00:21:30,790 --> 00:21:34,224
I am truly gratified to
learn that you miss me too.
443
00:21:35,160 --> 00:21:36,972
Oh, Mr. Woodman.
444
00:21:36,996 --> 00:21:38,307
Look at me.
445
00:21:38,331 --> 00:21:40,764
Look at both of me.
446
00:21:41,767 --> 00:21:45,647
Look at the look on my faces.
447
00:21:45,671 --> 00:21:49,284
Ah, please, Mr. Woodman,
give us a break.
448
00:21:49,308 --> 00:21:50,318
Lest you forget,
449
00:21:50,342 --> 00:21:53,344
we are a symbol
of good teaching.
450
00:21:55,147 --> 00:21:56,592
Yes, and someday
451
00:21:56,616 --> 00:21:58,927
they're gonna name a wing
here at Buchanan after us.
452
00:21:58,951 --> 00:22:01,930
They'll call it the
Horshack wing.
453
00:22:05,491 --> 00:22:08,470
Stop that flapping.
454
00:22:08,494 --> 00:22:10,961
You're making a draft.
455
00:22:12,231 --> 00:22:14,275
I can't let you back
in this classroom
456
00:22:14,299 --> 00:22:16,277
how will you keep
your grades up?
457
00:22:16,301 --> 00:22:17,701
I'll help him.
458
00:22:21,140 --> 00:22:23,551
Mr. Woodman, if Arnold
learned anything to get ahead,
459
00:22:23,575 --> 00:22:25,154
he learned it in this classroom.
460
00:22:25,178 --> 00:22:26,855
You wanna know
why? I'll tell you why.
461
00:22:26,879 --> 00:22:28,590
Because for someone to learn
462
00:22:28,614 --> 00:22:30,292
they gotta feel secure,
463
00:22:30,316 --> 00:22:32,550
they have to feel
like they belong.
464
00:22:34,687 --> 00:22:36,831
All right, Horshack,
465
00:22:36,855 --> 00:22:40,068
get back where you
belong, with Kotter's bunch.
466
00:22:44,263 --> 00:22:45,240
All right.
467
00:22:45,264 --> 00:22:48,143
Oh, I thank you all very much.
468
00:22:48,167 --> 00:22:51,312
You know in my other class,
every time I made a joke,
469
00:22:51,336 --> 00:22:52,481
the teacher said,
470
00:22:52,505 --> 00:22:54,985
"School is not a
laughing matter."
471
00:22:56,075 --> 00:22:57,686
And I said,
472
00:22:57,710 --> 00:23:01,657
Oh, yeah? You should
try Mr. Kotter's class.
473
00:23:01,681 --> 00:23:03,024
Welcome back, Horshack.
474
00:23:03,048 --> 00:23:06,160
♪ Welcome back ♪
475
00:23:06,184 --> 00:23:09,798
♪ Your dreams
Were your ticket out ♪
476
00:23:09,822 --> 00:23:11,355
♪ Welcome back ♪
477
00:23:13,592 --> 00:23:15,904
Hey, did I tell ya about the
present my cousin Howard
478
00:23:15,928 --> 00:23:17,606
gave my aunt Bernice
for her birthday?
479
00:23:17,630 --> 00:23:19,641
No, why don't you
tell me about it?
480
00:23:19,665 --> 00:23:20,809
Well, they're very rich
481
00:23:20,833 --> 00:23:22,677
and my aunt Bernice
has everything, right?
482
00:23:22,701 --> 00:23:24,580
So he figured he'd
get something different.
483
00:23:24,604 --> 00:23:26,849
He went to a pet store, and
got my aunt Bernice a parrot
484
00:23:26,873 --> 00:23:28,116
that speaks seven languages.
485
00:23:28,140 --> 00:23:29,818
He goes in, the
parrot's there and goes,
486
00:23:30,876 --> 00:23:31,987
Sprechen sie Deutsch?
487
00:23:33,946 --> 00:23:34,923
Terrific parrot.
488
00:23:34,947 --> 00:23:36,258
Right. Okay.
489
00:23:36,282 --> 00:23:37,693
Did Aunt Bernice like it?
490
00:23:37,717 --> 00:23:39,995
Well, he came back the next
day and that's what he said,
491
00:23:40,019 --> 00:23:41,697
"Aunt Bernice, do
you like the parrot?"
492
00:23:41,721 --> 00:23:44,454
She said, "Oh, that
parrot was delicious."
493
00:23:46,558 --> 00:23:48,537
He said, "You ate that parrot?
494
00:23:48,561 --> 00:23:52,574
That parrot cost 5000 dollars,
it spoke 7 different languages."
495
00:23:52,598 --> 00:23:53,975
Well, what did she say?
496
00:23:53,999 --> 00:23:56,378
"It should've said something."
497
00:23:56,402 --> 00:23:58,980
♪ Welcome back ♪
498
00:23:59,004 --> 00:24:03,040
♪ Your dreams Were
your ticket out... ♪
499
00:24:11,984 --> 00:24:14,662
♪ Welcome back ♪
500
00:24:14,686 --> 00:24:18,333
♪ Your dreams
Were your ticket out ♪
501
00:24:18,357 --> 00:24:20,869
♪ Welcome back ♪
502
00:24:20,893 --> 00:24:25,440
♪ To that same old place
That you laughed about ♪
503
00:24:25,464 --> 00:24:27,876
♪ Well, the names
Have all changed ♪
504
00:24:27,900 --> 00:24:29,844
♪ Since you hung around ♪
505
00:24:29,868 --> 00:24:32,113
♪ But those dreams
Have remained ♪
506
00:24:32,137 --> 00:24:34,783
♪ And they've turned around ♪
507
00:24:34,807 --> 00:24:36,518
♪ Who'd have thought
They'd lead ya ♪
508
00:24:36,542 --> 00:24:38,653
♪ Who'd have thought
They'd lead ya ♪
509
00:24:38,677 --> 00:24:40,488
♪ Back here where we need ya? ♪
510
00:24:40,512 --> 00:24:42,791
♪ Back here Where we need ya? ♪
511
00:24:42,815 --> 00:24:44,726
♪ Yeah, we tease him a lot ♪
512
00:24:44,750 --> 00:24:46,795
♪ 'Cause we've got
him On the spot ♪
513
00:24:46,819 --> 00:24:48,997
♪ Welcome back ♪
514
00:24:49,021 --> 00:24:50,899
♪ Welcome back Welcome back ♪
515
00:24:50,923 --> 00:24:53,301
♪ Welcome back ♪
516
00:24:53,325 --> 00:24:55,704
♪ Welcome back Welcome back ♪
517
00:24:55,728 --> 00:24:57,539
♪ Yeah we tease him a lot ♪
518
00:24:57,563 --> 00:24:59,941
♪ Welcome back Welcome back ♪
519
00:24:59,965 --> 00:25:01,977
♪ Cause we got him On the spot ♪
520
00:25:02,001 --> 00:25:04,179
♪ Welcome back Welcome back ♪
521
00:25:04,203 --> 00:25:06,581
♪ Yeah we tease him a lot ♪
522
00:25:06,605 --> 00:25:08,483
♪ Cause we got him On the spot ♪
523
00:25:08,507 --> 00:25:10,440
♪ Welcome back ♪
35240
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