Original subtitles

No one tells you what it means to be a good mother.

If it's being the mother my son wants me to be

or the mother I think he needs.

Inspired by a true story

I think most mothers don't ask themselves these questions.

I only asked after I had lost him.

Melting Away

Even when I think about it now,

I didn't notice any sign.

Maybe I didn't want to notice.

But I definitely wasn't prepared for this. No one was.

Assafi is a '"Mommy's boy'" and...

Shlomo, his father, had very high expectations.

They were never really close.

Leave me alone, Dad. -What's in that bag?. -None of your business.

None of my business?. Spending my money is my business.

I don't care about your money. -You don't?.

You care about painting?. That costs money.

Stop!. Don't touch that, Dad.

Leave it, Dad! -That costs money!

Your father's scary as hell.

No wonder you peed in bed till first grade.

Can we go?.

What's wrong?.

What are you doing?.

I'm asking that you go along with me this time.

So far we did it your way. -Shlomo, it doesn't look good.

And this looks good?.

Where can he go with these clothes?.

To his pervert friends, see what real life's like.

Where are you going?.

Mom, open up.

Mom, open up.

Mom...

Mom!

Mom!

open up!

Come on, open up!

open up.

open up!

Mom!

Mom, open the door... open up...

Mom!

open up already!

Bastards!

Most of the time I was afraid that, you know...

he'd get sick, hurt himself, fall down,

that someone would hurt him...

But that night I felt a different fear.

Fear of finding out my son is totally different from what I had thought.

That I don't really know him.

He'll be alright.

How will he be alright?. Will you make him alright?.

Do you accept this situation?.

You're wrong.

What if I'm right?.

You'll see, he has nowhere to stay. In a couple of days he'll return home,

start studying and get a job.

Then he won't have time for all that crap.

What if it doesn't work?.

It will work.

It didn't work.

Not only did it not work, we haven't seen him since.

At first, his friend, Shimi,

said Assaf needs some time and that he'll contact us when he's ready.

Then Shimi came to our house...

and said that Assaf

Ieft to Australia, to work.

A few weeks later Shlomo was diagnosed with a tumor

and we've been in hospitals ever since.

It's been 4 years since we saw Assaf.

Shlomo said we should leave him alone

and that Assaf will come back when he's ready.

This week we were told that the chemotherapy wasn't working.

I don't know what'll happen, I want you to find him

and tell him that his father is very sick.

And it has to be now because I don't know how much time he has left.

Here.

Thanks.

Do you have his friend... Shimi's address?.

Yes.

That's Assafi

and that's his friend, Shimi.

We'll start looking into it

and as soon as I know something, I'll contact you.

It's urgent so I'd appreciate it if you do it as soon as...

We'll start immediately.

Thanks. -Goodbye.

I want you to contact this guy, Shimi.

Tell him I want to meet him about Assaf Shapira.

Hey. -Hey.

It's so good to see you.

How are you?.

Coffee?. -Yes, please.

How was your flight?.

First class, no complaints.

How's my brave brother?.

He's a tough man.

Thanks.

It's strange, coming home when Shlomo's not around.

Where's Assaf?.

Is something wrong?.

Let's not get into it.

What?. Talk to me.

Not tonight, I can't.

Good night.

Good night.

Hello, good evening. Welcome to the Maxim Club.

Please welcome the most beautiful and talented drag queen Talula Bonet!

Anyone knows what's Culini?.

Do you?.

of course not.

Because it's not in Hebrew.

It's in African.

So if you ever meet anyone from Africa

ask him what's...

Culini, culini, culini....

culini, culini, ya...

Thanks.

Goldstar beer... What a macho.

You chose an interesting place to meet.

Don't worry, I'm not coming on to you. I'm taken.

Shimi, don't mess with me. I don't have time for games.

I'm looking for Assaf. Where is he?. -I've no idea.

I think he's still in Australia. -Why?.

He's happy there. He's having a good time...

I mean, why do you think you can fool me?.

Do I look stupid to you?.

There are things he needs to know. I only want to talk to him.

His father's sick.

He has cancer.

You should talk to him.

He'll be here soon.

People look happy here.

We're not called '"gay'" for nothing.

Shit...

Excuse me... Assaf!

Assaf Shapira.

Who are you?. -I'm Eitan.

I'm Anna.

How can I help you?.

Your mom asked me to find you, son.

Who are you, miss?. -You mean '"sir'".

I mean '"miss'".

You address me as a male, so I address you as a female.

I thought you're playing with me.

Who are you?. -I'm a private detective.

Your mom hired me to find you, son... miss.

My mom died long ago.

Look, this is way over my head...

Your father, Shlomo... -oh...

You mean those who brought me into the world, Shlomo and Galya.

That's different, they're not real parents.

You smoke?.

No, I quit.

But I think I'll start smoking again.

Thanks.

How many kids you got?. -I don't have kids.

No way... Low sperm count?.

No... it's fine.

Eitan, do you know how many years you need to study to become a professor?.

But you become a parent automatically after 9 months.

Funny, isn't it?.

My parents quit parenting. They decided not to be my parents

when they realized they didn't like the product.

You can tell Mr. and Mrs. Shapira they're not to my liking either.

Look, my job was...

to find you and let you know your father's sick.

Your mother's a wreck.

They don't know how much time he's got.

Are you done?.

Here's my business card.

If you ever need anything.

What do I tell your mother?.

That I met Assaf or Anna?.

Who do you think she looked for?.

If you ask me, we should open a '"lost dogs'" department.

What do I tell this mother about her son?.

What do I tell her?.

Look at what I do for a living.

I make people feel bad, Redhead.

I show them pictures of their wives cheating on them,

of employees deceiving them.

You also do people a lot of good. -When?. To whom?.

I always end up with these stories.

Good morning.

I'm Anna. I'm a private nurse.

The insurance company sent me.

I didn't ask for a private nurse.

You didn't have to, it's included in your senior employee insurance.

That's really unnecessary.

The insurance sends flowers as well?.

Would you like something to drink?. -No.

I'd like to read the paper.

There's some change on the table.

Anything else?. -No.

Something for your mood?.

Huh?. -Nothing. I'll be right back.

Who sent you these beautiful flowers?.

Anna. -Who's Anna?.

The insurance company sent me a private nurse.

I suggest you take the day off,

go get a haircut. -I don't feel like it.

I want my wife to get her hair blown dry.

You hate it when I get my hair blown dry. -But now I really want you to.

Stop, stop, stop, cut it out.

That's disgusting. Aren't you ashamed?.

Hey... -Kissing like that after 20 years of marriage.

That's incest. What are you doing?.

You look younger each day. How's London?.

It's waiting for you. -Did you take your pills this morning?.

I took them. Go, it's oK.

Are you sure?. -Yes, honey.

Bye. -Bye.

Bye, bye...

Sorry. It's my wife, I got to answer. I'll be right with you.

Yes.

What do you want?.!

I'm in the middle of work!

Enough... Bye, bye.

This is for you.

Anna, meet Haim. He's my partner.

Anna?.

Nice to meet you. -Very nice to meet you.

And that's my brother, ltzik. -Nice to meet you, Anna.

Anna (Also:. please) as in '"oh Lord, please help us'"?.

Itzik, ltzik, ltzik...

We have some work to do so...

I'll be outside if you need anything.

You don't tell us about the good things, huh, Shlomo?.

Please, they need to turn in the forms.

The committee has to approve it.

Here, little ones...

Dad will make it comfy

and you won't fall off either.

Eitan?.

Eitan.

Hi, Galya.

Shit... sorry.

Hi...

It's good to see you. How are you?. -Fine.

I was surprised you came up with something so quick.

Yeah, well...

It wasn't that hard. Have a seat.

Look...

Your son... I don't know how to say this to you...

Your son is...

He...

He doesn't want any contact with you.

Where did you find him?. -He's here, in the city.

He lives his life. He...

I met him at some night club. -How does he look?.

What do you mean?. -ls he healthy?. Sick?.

Is he oK?. Skinny?. What kind of life...

Looks like he's happy with the way he lives.

Do you have any pictures?. -Pictures?. No.

No. Why would I have pictures?.

I don't know. I thought private detectives take pictures.

That's...

that's what you see in movies.

Does he understand his father is sick?.

Look, I think he needs time.

He's angry.

I know. -Give him time.

There's no time.

Take me to him. I want to talk to him.

It's not that simple, he's...

I have to trace his tracks all over again.

He's always on the move.

Doesn't he have a home?. Where does he sleep?.

Who looks out for him?. -He's taken care of. Don't worry.

He lives with a friend, with friends.

Listen, my husband got a private nurse for a few days

so I have time to help you find him.

Here is what I suggest... I have a lot of experience,

he needs a couple of days to grasp the situation.

Don't worry, I'm here.

If he doesn't contact you in a few days,

I'll take you to him. What do you say?.

I hope she's Filipino. They're the best. Hard workers.

Who?. -The woman taking care of your husband.

Filipinos are the best.

I just went through this with my father.

Anna...

I don't think it's a Filipino name. Maybe she's Romanian. Don't know.

Anna?.

Listen, I know you said I should pay when we're done

but I'd be happy to give an advance payment.

Redhead takes care of money issues.

What are you thinking about?. The game hasn't started yet.

I'll think as long as I want.

oK...

You're not too good in checkers, huh?.

It's just a game. Why are you so competitive?.

I'm not competitive,

I'm an achiever.

Look, if you would've made this move, you'd capture these two,

that one and that one, and then you'd have a king.

It's all about the choices you make. Like in real life.

Do you really think life is all about the choices you make?.

Yes.

And your condition is a choice?.

You don't choose to have cancer.

That was quick.

Sorry if I disappointed you. -You haven't.

I'm better with errands. I think I'll bring you a cup of coffee anyway.

Decaf. -Please.

Please.

Please...

Thanks.

You're welcome.

I hope I didn't offend you earlier. -Hey...

Hi, you must be...

Anna. -Yes. -Excuse me... -What's that?.

Haim's wife sent you tons of food. Chopped liver... don't ask.

I have to go. -Don't you want some?. There's plenty.

No, that's oK. Next time.

What are we going to do with all this food?. -That's oK...

Goodbye. -Bye. -Good bye.

Thank you. -You're welcome.

Seems cute.

You're cute too.

Eat.

I'm drinking my coffee... -Coffee's not food. Eat.

I'm not hungry, Galya. I don't have an appetite.

This will give you an appetite.

I missed you.

See?. It's good for you to take time off sometimes.

Anna! Welcome.

Glad you're here already. -How are you, Sarah?.

Everything's good. Thank God. Have a seat.

Did you bring me some work?. -Nothing serious...

A little hem here. -Show me... -I marked it for you.

oK, put it in the living room so it won't smell of fried onions.

Where's Shimi?.

He's in his room with Moti.

Here... Shimi!

Eat. -I'm not hungry, Sarah.

No need to be hungry for my cooking.

Shimon, the food's getting cold.

I'm a bit worried about his health.

Seems like he's having trouble hearing.

He once complained about his ear having...

What's it called?. Tintin... in his ear.

Tinnitus -Tinnitus...

Hi. Just in time...

How many times do I have to call you till you come?.

Do you still have that tinnitus in your ear?.

I have tinnitus from your shouting.

What's going on?. -What's going on?.

Are you angry at me?. Is that it?.

I'm not angry. -What then?. -Disappointed.

That thug came up to me, asked where you were,

what could I've told him?. I can't keep lying like that.

It's not your fault but you could've warned me.

oK, sorry.

You know I don't do well under pressure.

The Gay Pride Parade events began in the city

without loud music or dancing.

only a moment of silence. -lncredible.

Ten months since the killing at the gay youth bar.

Tens of thousands went out to the streets today to show

that they still remember, and they're still proud.

It is estimated that the first parade since the killing

was the largest ever, with over 1 00, 000 participants

who showed, once again, that they know how to celebrate.

This parade marked the end of the Gay Pride week.

A similar parade will be held in Jerusalem

where once again, the values of tolerance and equality

of our society will be put to the test.

And now for the weather...

May all those faggots go to hell. They've ruined our country.

Moti, eat, eat. You're nothing but skin and bones.

The Kubbeh's amazing. Never tasted anything like it.

We'll see what kind of Kubbeh his wife will make him some day.

Hi.

Haven't you left yet?. -No, not yet.

Itzik's home.

Itzik is not you.

What's wrong?.

I feel I was such a lousy mother.

Galya...

Enough.

No.

Wouldn't you want him to be with you now?.

I believe he's fine.

If he wants us, he can always find us.

You're here and I'm alone and I miss you and Assaf.

I know.

I'm sorry.

I know it's difficult for you.

Wish I could make it easier on you.

My baldness is turning you on, huh?.

Come here...

But no sex...

Do you have kids?.

I have a son.

Really?.

So where is he?.

He's not here.

He's in Australia.

What about you?.

You must be single. No kids.

Do you have a boyfriend?.

Not at the moment.

Don't wait too long. Family's important.

What does one have without a family?.

oK...

I want to shower before I get my scan.

I'm fine...

Are you oK?. -Yeah.

Anna!

Don't worry, Dr. Teichman will explain everything to you.

Anna!

Hold me! Hold me!

Hold me. -Turn off the water!

Call someone for help...

Nurse...

Nurse...

Nurse! Get someone in here!

Nurse!

Nurse!

Nurse!

Perhaps he got too worked up. It could happen in his condition.

It happens. It's oK.

The doctor will give him a sedative to prevent these seizures.

It'll be oK.

Can I have Shlomo Shapira's file for the CT?. -Yes.

Hey, what are you doing here?.

Hey.

Hey.

Say, are you in a hurry?.

Excuse me?.

You always seem a bit tense.

How is it your business?.

If I want to ask you to have coffee later on,

it's kind of my business, right?.

No, thanks.

Here, this is Shlomo Shapira's file. You need to give it to Dr. Teichman.

Thank you. -You're welcome.

So he's fine?.

He'll be oK.

Shlomo, I'm going to get something to eat. oK if you stay with ltzik?.

Fine...

She's a bit weird, isn't she?.

Cool it, ltzik.

I'm cool, Shlomo. Everything's cool.

I can't.

Do you want to move in together or not?. -That's not the point.

Shimi, I can't lie to her anymore. She's like a mother to me. -Fine.

You really think she doesn't know?. -lf she knows, let's leave it at that.

She knows it in her heart.

There's no point analyzing it. I don't want to!

You said you'd talk to her today. -ls this a lynch?.!

What could happen?. -She'll get a stroke, she'll look like this

and when I'll look at her I'll feel like a filthy fag. -Stop...

she won't get a stroke. -Just like your father didn't get sick...

Sorry...

That's such bullshit...

Shimi!

Rachel from the drugstore gave me her daughter's phone number.

So?. -She's a nice girl, looking for commitment. Go meet her.

Maybe she's the one.

Mom, they're waiting for me downstairs. Talk to you later. Bye.

But you just got here. -Bye.

Well?. -I can't. Get off my case.

Were you close to your father?.

Can you not be close to your father?.

Yes. -How?.

Maybe not as close as friends.

I was closer to my mother.

I'd ask her advice about all kinds of personal issues.

My father was hardly at home

and when he was I couldn't trouble him with my personal issues.

So how were you close to him?. -ln little things.

He'd take me to the sea, to watch the waves.

I always knew something was going to happen.

Either he'd start a new job

or go with Mom to a vacation.

once he bought ltzik a new bicycle.

Do you miss him?.

A lot.

I miss both of them.

Parents need parents too.

Parents miss their parents too.

We could have solved that together.

Are you one of those girls who're going to give me a hard time?.

I'm one of those girls who say they're not interested politely.

Looks like you're one of those guys who don't get it.

Why are you being aggressive?.

I'm only making conversation.

You take such good care of my brother,

you're kind of family now, right?.

You don't know how hard it is for me to see him like this.

You don't know what he was like before he was sick.

Cancer doesn't do good to anyone.

You're probably used to seeing sick people, right?.

I have to go. -How about I pick you up later?.

We'll go have something to eat and talk.

It's strange but somehow I feel comfortable talking to you.

What's funny?.

So are we on?.

Why are you touching me?.

Sorry.

Are we on?. -Forget it.

Hey...

We hardly meet anymore.

Right...

Thanks for all you're doing for my husband.

You're welcome.

Maybe she's not home. -Not home?. Her car's here.

Anna!

Turn down that crap.

Are you coming?.

We're going to tell Sarah. That's it, I've made up my mind.

I swear, I'm telling her today. You know why?.

I don't think she cares. -Shhh...

Stop hushing me. -Shut up!

I realized my problem was that maybe she doesn't know now

but when she finds out her son fucks up the ass it won't be my problem,

it'll be her problem. Get it?.

It'll be her problem, not mine. Come down!

We're going to tell Sarah... don't fall off!

Say something.

When was the last time you had your bikini line waxed?.

You're an idiot. You really are.

Idiot. -Come on, we'll go get you waxed.

Come on, get down here, sweetie.

Get down here.

Get down here!

His mother will never accept it.

He can't live a second without his mother.

We'll end up breaking up over this.

Shimi... you're early.

Food's not ready yet. I got home late.

Mom...

What, honey?. Gorgeous...

Can you sit down for a second?. I need to talk to you.

Alright...

What is it?.

There's something I need to tell you. Don't freak out and try to understand.

only roaches freak me out. -Mom, this is serious. It's important.

Please...

oK, I'm listening.

What?.

I'm gay

and I have a boyfriend,

and I love him and he loves me.

He's a guy.

Who is it?.

Moti.

Moti.

Moti....

My Moti.

You're together?. -Yeah.

We're not just friends,

we're a couple.

Sweetie, at least you got your mother's taste.

Yeah, Moti's real good looking, isn't he?.

Never crossed your mind that we're more than just friends?.

How would I know if you didn't tell me, huh?.

I thought there was something weird about you two.

What will we do...

if people...

neighbors talk...

and make fun of you for having such a son?.

I'll tell them they're jealous...

their daughter doesn't have such a good looking groom.

If they give you a hard time I'll take you and Moti and go live in Turkey.

over there they walk hand in hand without getting any trouble.

They walk out on the streets. Seen it in my own eyes on TV.

You have an answer for anything...

You're the best.

Don't get me wrong...

if your dad were alive he'd drop dead,

but what do I have except you, huh?.

At least you have someone to love, you're not alone, right?.

Come on, give your mom a hug..

There he is.

It's all good. -What's all good?.

She said I have good taste.

Did you tell her we're moving in together. -Look at you, flying.

I really need some air...

Sarah's the best, huh?.

Hi.

I want to see him.

Her.

Now.

She's very talented, I think.

Very.

Is this the big secret?.

You became a tranny?.

Let me see...

Get your hands off me.

And you let me come on to you, you crazy son of a bitch?.

All the stories they told me...

Australia, New Zealand.

Are you crazy?. Look what you did to your father.

He doesn't know a thing. -He thinks you're Anna the Merciful, right?.

Stay out of it, ltzik. -Stay out of it?.

Go near him again and I'll break your bones!

Relax, ltzik. -You hear me, you little pervert?.

What are you doing?. -ls that clear?. -Let me go.

Don't go anywhere near him.

Look at me, you little pervert...!

You understand what you did?.!

Let go of me! -You understand what you did?.!

Get your hands off me. -I'll crush you, you hear?.

Get your hands off me. -You hear?.

Get off!

Get your hands off me!

It's me, that's what I am!

Get out of here!

Get out of my apartment!

Get out of my apartment!

Assafi.

Assafi, it's not you, son.

Leave...

now.

Get out of here!

It can be treated. I can help you.

Look at yourself and tell me who needs treatment.

Anna...

I really look like a cancer patient.

Galya said bald is sexy.

Galya is right.

Itzik...

Here, I'll help you.

No, ltzik. No...

I'm fine.

I'm going out for a cigarette. -Are you leaving?.

No... I'm staying until the end of the day.

oK.

Thanks. It's only family now.

'"operating Room'"

What are you doing here?.

I hope they pay you good money for wearing this costume.

What do you want?. -To ask you to...

I think it's better Dad remembers you the way you were before.

That's it?.

That's all you have to say?.

I wanted to ask you as my son... -Daughter...

I can't tell you what to do, it's your father,

I'm just worried that if he realizes...

Since when do you smoke?.

Think you know everything about me?.

Hey, honey, need a light?.

No, thanks.

Get lost, you pervert. -What?. I'll pay you.

You heard that, get lost! -Fucking tranny.

Ignore that. -What was that?.

What do you think?.

I didn't know you could throw stones likes that.

Think you know everything about me?.

I have to go back in.

What's the deal with your coffee?.

That's how my father used to drink it.

But only Shlomo would make him coffee.

They had a ritual every evening.

My father would come home from work, Shlomo would make coffee,

then they'd sit in the living room and talk.

They'd talk about work, politics, life.

They always looked like two grown men.

Doesn't it seem like the right time to quit smoking?.

Shlomo quit smoking. That didn't help.

What do you say?.

I don't know...

They say daughters brighten up the house, right?.

Seriously, what do you say?.

You gave him life, right?.

If you gave it to him,

it's his life.

May I come in?.

Would you like something to drink?. -Yes.

Coffee?. -Great.

Two sweeteners... -Two sweeteners and a little milk.

You were always a good painter, son.

I want to try to understand.

I don't know if I'll ever be comfortable with it.

Takes time to get used to it.

I think that if I'd fought for you earlier...

If you keep addressing me in male form you'll never get used to it.

Maybe so.

Maybe I'll never get used to it. Don't know how you can get used to it.

You have to understand I'm not Assaf.

I never felt I was.

For me, you're Assaf. No matter what you wear, you're Assaf.

You want to be with men, go ahead.

Why do you need to be a woman?. If you change your mind, how will you...?.

What will you do with these things?.

How would you feel without these things?.

How would any woman feel without these things?.

You don't wake up one morning and feel like getting boobs.

But how do you know a therapist can't solve it?.

I felt something was wrong as long as I remember myself.

Why didn't you say anything?. You're my son.

Daughter.

I couldn't even explain it to myself and certainly not to you two.

only in high school I realized I couldn't help it.

I'd go out in the evening with a bag and dress as a woman.

outdoors I was Anna and at home I was Assaf.

I started to get to know myself and try...

See how I felt...

But then you found out.

I'm sorry.

I know I disappointed you.

No,

I'm not disappointed at my son... my daughter.

I'm disappointed at myself. -You were disappointed.

otherwise you wouldn't have left a teenager outside,

alone in the rain with nowhere to stay.

I think...

I should go now.

You must be tired.

Hey. -Hey...

I missed you.

Thanks.

You look much better.

I came to say goodbye.

Can I ask you for something?.

Are you happy?.

Are you content?.

Yes.

Galya, I have to go, I have a court hearing. -Sure.

Thank you very much for all you've done for us.

When things calm down, come by to sign some forms.

of course you, ltzik and Anna are the sole heirs

but we have to make it official.

Anna?.

Yes, he didn't want any legal problems so he changed it in the will to Anna

about three years ago.

What?.

Chen Yani

Limor Goldstein

Ami Weinberg

Oded Leopold, Eyal Rozales, Shay Kadimi

Yonatan Barak, Shosha Goren, Hanan Swisa

Directed by:. Doron Eran

Script: Billy Ben Moshe

Producers: Doron Eran, Billy Ben Moshe

Head cinematographer: Daniel Kedem

Editor: Reut Han

Art design: Yoram Shayer

Original music: Danny Reichenthal