Original subtitles

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Mission accomplished?

Negative.

I need more time.

To the office, Alfie.

Here, this way.

Come on. That's it.

This would be a lot easier if everybody would just keep calm.

- Mr. Sweet! - Not now, Alfie.

That wasn't so hard.

Get it, Alfie.

Empty office!

There it is.

Open the door.

Faster.

Good girl. Good girl.

Come on.

Come with me.

Yes, perfect.

Perfect.

Were you behind me the entire time, Jerome?

Certainly was.

Oh.

Well, out, out, out.

No, no, no, please. I have to stay.

Please. Out, out, out.

- I have to... no! - Out, out.

Stay.

All right, everyone... Whoo.

Fun and games over.

Nothing else to be seen here.

I'm so sorry, Mr. Sweet.

Mr. Lewis.

Can I presume from that cage in your hands.

That this goose is yours.

Well, I don't know. All geese look the same to me.

Yeah, um, I'm looking after it for a friend.

So we will just go...

I'm sorry, but nobody is going into or coming out of that room.

While there is a wild goose quite literally.

On the loose.

Both of you.

We will let the goose calm down.

And then we will put the goose.

Back in its cage, all right?

Off you go.

So how'd you do?

So close, and yet so very, very far.

No.

Ah...

I did just see Alfie and Mr. Sweet.

Chasing a renegade goose down the corridor,

Didn't I?

Yeah. Pretty much.

Just checking.

So I was planning my social calendar...

Huh?

Yeah.

And I was thinking Friday

I might go to the movies.

Or pizza.

You know I love pizza.

Well, everyone loves pizza.

Well, apart from some people.

Vegans... they don't.

So...

I'll let you think about that.

Hmm.

Come.

Ah.

Well, he had a spare hidden in Amber's Dollhouse.

Vera,

You are quite spectacular.

Oh, thank you, Victor.

I do try.

So now you can go down there and keep tabs on their progress.

I am worried.

What if the students check the Dollhouse.

And find the amulet gone?

Ah, now, you leave that one to me.

Excellent.

Thank you very much indeed.

Bye, now.

And here we have the replica of the sarcophagus.

Of neferrero cari carci.

"b" plus for effort.

Neffaricari carci.

I'm new to this.

You've been studying it for years.

Guilty.

When I was Fabian's age, most guys were dating girls.

I was mainly dating carbon.

Excuse me one moment, Trudy.

What's wrong, Fabian?

Down in the love dumps?

That's one way of putting it.

Is it that obvious?

Only to me.

But then, I am kind of a dating guru.

It's Nina, isn't it?

No. Joy.

You're in love with Joy?

Look, Amber! Indoor voice, please.

I'm not in love with her,

But I think she's trying to ask me out.

So the hunter has circled her prey long enough.

- Sorry, I'm her what-now?

And you're trying to put her off.

You've done the right thing in coming to the guru for advice.

Yeah, I didn't ask for ad...

'cause thanks to my experiences with Mick and Alfie,

I'm well-versed in all facets of love.

And general relationship matters.

Well...

Okay.

Do your worst.

Right.

Whatever you do, don't say yes,

Because you will give her the wrong impression,

And you will upset her.

I mean, not saying yes was pretty much.

Going to be my first...

There's more.

And this is where it gets tricky.

Whatever you do, don't say no either.

Well, that just sounds confusing.

Why can't I just say no?

Because then you'll seem hard to get.

And if there's one thing us girls want,

It's someone we can't have.

So don't say yes; Don't say no.

But what do I say to put her off?

Don't worry; I've just started, silly.

Gordon, it's Victor.

Oh, stop crying, you sniveling wretch.

You knew this day would come eventually.

You owe me a favor,

And I want to cash it in.

I want an object forged.

No, no, no, no.

Not the end of the week.

The end of the day.

Excellent.

Ready, Lewis, Clark?

We were born ready, sir.

Good chaps.

Three, two, one.

Go!

No, no, no, no, where is it?

Careful, careful!

My fingers!

Where is it?

In, in, in, in.

In, in, yes.

Yes.

And we're clear.

Well, that wasn't too hard in the end, was it?

Excellent teamwork, Alfie.

Whoo!

Well, let's get this place tidied up.

And we will leave you to that, sir.

Oh, you will, will you?

I think you'll find that you two.

Will be on clearing up duty.

After you've returned our little visitor.

Great.

It can't be.

It must be.

But is it even possible?

Can you think of any other explanation?

Maybe sweetie swallowed it in order to confuse you.

Fat chance.

We have to face facts, okay?

Your goose has eaten my dad's gem.

So what do we do now?

Oh, it's very simple.

We wait.

For what?

Oh, no.

One word.

Wow.

How did you do this?

- We did a smash-and-grab in the arboretum.

Okay, guys. Practice time.

So we need to get from here to the vanity desk.

Without touching any of them.

And the silver threads give you a sting.

What about the others?

We don't know yet, but I'm sure it's not good.

I don't get it.

How are we supposed to get over there without touching anything?

Allow me.

Amber, are those the right kind of shoes for Web walking?

These are my Web wedges, Patricia.

You're talking to a girl.

Who can deadly hopscotch in formal wear.

Watch and learn.

Okay.

Good job.

Under. Good.

Oh, wait, careful, careful!

Amber's stuck!

I'm stuck, I'm stuck!

Man down, man down.

Just stop moving around so much.

Don't move. Don't move.

How are these Web wedges working out, Amber?

Oh, this isn't going so great.

Okay, guys, we need much more practice.

And I suggest a dress code of no heels.

Or clothes that snag.

Oh, yay. Talk outfits.

I kind of feel like spider food.

Okay, hold on.

I got you.

Help. Somebody help.

Now, all I'm asking is that you do me the simple courtesy.

Or responding to my texts.

All of this has just gone too far.

The collector, these...

What is your problem?

You've put me in an impossible situation.

How you can maintain this masquerade...

Needs must.

It's a matter of priorities.

And of you getting yours right.

You know I won't let anything stand in our way.

Is someone there?

Well, I'll go and look.

Shall I?

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Well, see anything?

No.

There's no one here.

Okay, this is getting too risky.

If I were you, I wouldn't run the risk.

Of going back on our deal.

Good night, Jasper.

Projects due in tomorrow.

Please, no excuses.

And Alfie, Jerome,

We all know you don't have a dog,

So that particular excuse won't fly.

We do have a goose, and that does fly.

And eat inappropriate things.

Shut up!

So what's the plan tonight?

We need to get better at dodging those spider threads.

More practice later?

Oh, you better count me out.

Detention date with el victoro.

Hi.

Ah, hello, Trudy.

Everything okay?

Yes.

Oh, I'm just being silly about something.

That's all.

It's... well, it's about Vera.

What about her?

Do you think there's something about her,

Something that just doesn't add up?

Well, there are a few things.

That I've been thinking are a little strange.

Such as?

I don't know.

Eric said that she was the only applicant.

For your old job.

But I distinctly remember putting a whole pile of resumes.

On his desk.

Well, what do you think happened to them?

Well, leave it with me, Trudy.

I'll do some digging.

He's kind of cute, isn't he?

For a goose, I mean.

All I see is a feathery gem eater.

Mocking me with his exceptional bowel control.

Usually, in your experience,

How often do geese, like, go,

On average?

All I know is,

Inside that bird is something I need.

And sooner or later nature and gravity.

Will work their sweet, sweet magic.

If only I knew a way to make it happen faster.

I do. I ordered it off the Internet.

Ordered what?

Ruffruff's pet lax.

It should arrive today.

It's full of roughage to help dogs get things moving.

Feathered or fur, the process is basically the same.

Then hurrah for the Internet.

Watch out for the flowers, losers.

Some of us are hard at work here.

Nice kick.

Well, I did used to play for my school football team.

Really?

I just didn't figure you were a lady jock,

Even if it was just soccer.

Uh, no. Not "soccer."

Football, real football.

Can I assume by the tone of your voice.

You don't think a lot of our great game?

Yeah, until proven otherwise.

Is that a challenge?

Well, Vera, my forger finaly came through with the goods.

Oh, it's bigger than I expected.

No, no, not that.

No, I found that on the doorstep.

No.

This is it.

Oh, my goodness.

Well, they're identical.

They even weigh the same.

I know.

We must plant this as soon as possible.

Don't worry.

I'll ensure that the coast is clear.

What is in this parcel?

"ruffruff pet lax"?

Who ordered this?

Let me...

They know the rules about pets.

But this might work to our advantage.

You ready?

This game is not for ladies.

Hey, I am not a lady.

Yeah, you're right.

That was awesome.

Now my turn.

Everyone into the living room immediately.

Come along.

Sorry, Victor.

What's this about?

Yeah, Alfie and I have homework to ignore.

Sit down, all of you.

Be quiet.

This arrived today.

The recipient is a mystery.

However, the contents are not.

Pet food.

The rules are very clear.

Pets are strictly prohibited at anubis house.

If one of you is found to be harboring one,

The punishment will be most severe.

Now, Vera will chaperone you here.

Whilst I conduct a thorough search of the entire house,

Starting upstairs.

Remind me.

We left the goose on the bed in plain sight,

Didn't we?

Yeah.

Good, because for a moment there I was worried.

That Victor wouldn't find him.

- This is really bad. - I know.

What if Victor finds out I adopted a giant panda?

I don't think that's the kind of pet.

Victor's really that worried about, Amber.

I meant, what if he finds the spare amulet?

Oh.

Oh, yeah.

That would be way worse.

Yes.

Those brats will never know.

The upstairs is clear.

Our room's next.

We have to hide the goose.

Victor, can we go get some of our school books?

No, no, you heard what I said.

I said you are to... Yeah, but no offense,

This is boring.

Hey, everyone.

Please, just one trashy magazine.

Have a heart.

And we have so many tests to study for.

Quiet!

I am sure it will be fine, Victor.

After all, their room has already been searched,

Hasn't it?

Very well, but make it quick.

Check the Dollhouse.

Just where we left it.

Come on. This obviously hurts.

No, you're weak.

Admit it and move on.

No.

No, no, no.

Admit it and move on.

Not that, doofus.

Can I go, Vera?

I've got to go and check on something.

Of course,

Just as soon as Victor says it's okay.

Oh!

No.

Look, let's just get it out of the way:

The ball, our kiss.

I'm sorry about that, okay?

It was a bit sneaky of me.

Joy, I don't...

It's only because I like you.

You know that, right?

Do you think there's ever.

A chance of us hanging out.

Like we used to, just a bit...

A bit more date-y?

Whatever you do, don't say yes.

Whatever you do, don't say no either.

Maybe?

Really?

Great.

Come on. It must be here.

Alfie.

No, no.

Why have you left the living room?

Us?

We're polishing.

It's so unfair that Vera has to do this by herself.

- What was that? - That was me.

My bad stomach.

It's not been the same since eating all those carrots.

It's very sad.

He'll be fine.

Go and get a glass of water.

Water, yeah, thanks.

Victor, Patricia has left the house without permission.

No!

Come on. It must be here.

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