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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,822 --> 00:00:04,123 Hot in Cleveland is recorded in front of a live studio audience. 2 00:00:04,758 --> 00:00:06,759 Rock and roll history will be made 3 00:00:06,793 --> 00:00:08,326 in Cleveland this week 4 00:00:08,360 --> 00:00:10,362 when sexy rocker Johnny Revere 5 00:00:10,396 --> 00:00:12,764 reunites with his band mate, Drago, 6 00:00:12,798 --> 00:00:17,869 shown here during their 1988 simpatico tour. 7 00:00:17,904 --> 00:00:21,372 Unfortunately, one week into simpatico, 8 00:00:21,406 --> 00:00:25,476 Johnny and Drago broke up due to creative differences. 9 00:00:25,511 --> 00:00:28,447 They hate each other. 10 00:00:28,481 --> 00:00:30,684 But now the two rockers have agreed 11 00:00:30,718 --> 00:00:32,685 to put aside their differences to perform 12 00:00:32,720 --> 00:00:35,755 a We Are The World type song promoting the idea 13 00:00:35,789 --> 00:00:37,757 that everyone should just stop yelling at each other 14 00:00:37,791 --> 00:00:39,591 and get along. 15 00:00:39,626 --> 00:00:42,628 It's called Cool Aid: A time to chill. 16 00:00:44,697 --> 00:00:46,464 And I'll have exclusive access 17 00:00:46,499 --> 00:00:48,099 to the story behind the story 18 00:00:48,133 --> 00:00:50,267 because I happen to know 19 00:00:50,302 --> 00:00:54,206 the lucky lady dating Johnny Revere. 20 00:00:54,240 --> 00:00:56,710 That's right, the Ohio part of America. 21 00:00:56,744 --> 00:00:59,346 It's me. 22 00:01:03,018 --> 00:01:04,418 Hey, what are you doing? 23 00:01:04,453 --> 00:01:05,886 Oh, just chilling glasses. 24 00:01:05,920 --> 00:01:07,821 Johnny likes his martini cold 25 00:01:07,856 --> 00:01:09,624 and his Victoria hot. 26 00:01:09,658 --> 00:01:10,625 [Chuckles] 27 00:01:10,660 --> 00:01:11,961 This Cool Aid thing 28 00:01:11,995 --> 00:01:13,829 has an amazing lineup of musicians. 29 00:01:13,863 --> 00:01:15,465 [Gasps] Oh, my God. 30 00:01:15,499 --> 00:01:17,167 David Gates is gonna be there? 31 00:01:17,201 --> 00:01:18,969 - Who? - David Gates from Bread. 32 00:01:19,003 --> 00:01:20,437 Oh, I must have listened to The Best of Bread 33 00:01:20,472 --> 00:01:22,507 a million times in high school. 34 00:01:22,541 --> 00:01:25,444 You went to high school in an elevator? 35 00:01:31,051 --> 00:01:33,152 Bread is not elevator music. 36 00:01:33,187 --> 00:01:35,855 It's soft rock. 37 00:01:35,889 --> 00:01:36,889 There's a difference. 38 00:01:36,924 --> 00:01:37,957 Oh, sure. 39 00:01:37,991 --> 00:01:40,159 Soft rock isn't all up in your face 40 00:01:40,193 --> 00:01:44,096 like elevator music. 41 00:01:44,130 --> 00:01:45,798 I'm coming with you to the recording session. 42 00:01:50,871 --> 00:01:53,840 I still dream of becoming a professional singer. 43 00:01:53,874 --> 00:01:56,109 And I dream about CC Sabathia 44 00:01:56,144 --> 00:01:58,545 coming back to the Indians. 45 00:01:58,580 --> 00:02:00,948 Neither one of 'em's gonna happen. 46 00:02:00,983 --> 00:02:02,283 Seriously. 47 00:02:02,318 --> 00:02:03,685 I'm better than Verena. 48 00:02:03,719 --> 00:02:05,454 Stupid Mariah Carey wannabe. 49 00:02:05,488 --> 00:02:08,157 - Well, doesn't Verena have, like, a six-octave range? 50 00:02:08,191 --> 00:02:10,659 If computers can digitally take out a rib 51 00:02:10,694 --> 00:02:12,362 for a photo shoot, they can do anything. 52 00:02:12,396 --> 00:02:15,632 I told you that in confidence. 53 00:02:15,666 --> 00:02:16,633 [Doorbell rings] 54 00:02:16,667 --> 00:02:17,934 Oh, that must be Johnny. 55 00:02:17,968 --> 00:02:19,635 Do you want us to stall him while you get ready? 56 00:02:19,670 --> 00:02:21,938 No, that's what's so great about our relationship now. 57 00:02:21,972 --> 00:02:23,773 We can just be ourselves. 58 00:02:33,317 --> 00:02:34,417 Guess who's hot for teacher. 59 00:02:34,451 --> 00:02:36,519 I... 60 00:02:42,093 --> 00:02:44,327 Oh, I was expecting someone else. 61 00:02:44,362 --> 00:02:48,165 Would you like to buy some chocolate? 62 00:02:48,199 --> 00:02:49,833 Do you really think that I could eat candy 63 00:02:49,868 --> 00:02:52,402 and fit into an outfit like this? 64 00:02:52,437 --> 00:02:55,272 Why are you dressed like that? 65 00:02:55,307 --> 00:02:57,575 Well, I just got home from school, 66 00:02:57,609 --> 00:03:00,211 and, uh, haven't had a chance to put on 67 00:03:00,245 --> 00:03:03,013 my play clothes yet. 68 00:03:03,048 --> 00:03:05,716 Oh, and there's my playmate now. 69 00:03:05,750 --> 00:03:07,518 - Hi, Victoria. - Hi, Johnny. 70 00:03:07,552 --> 00:03:09,119 I had a "hot for teacher" line, 71 00:03:09,153 --> 00:03:12,690 but now that seems wildly inappropriate. 72 00:03:12,724 --> 00:03:16,461 Uh, we need to talk. 73 00:03:16,495 --> 00:03:17,729 Uh-oh. 74 00:03:17,764 --> 00:03:20,833 Sounds like you're gonna need some chocolate. 75 00:03:23,764 --> 00:03:28,833 Sync, corrected by Alice www.addic7ed.com 76 00:03:31,812 --> 00:03:33,880 Well, Natalya and I have been seeing each other 77 00:03:33,914 --> 00:03:35,381 for six months. 78 00:03:35,415 --> 00:03:36,582 How old is she? 79 00:03:36,617 --> 00:03:37,917 That's not important. 80 00:03:37,951 --> 00:03:41,053 Oh, my God. How young is she? 81 00:03:41,087 --> 00:03:42,954 - 22. - [Gasps] 82 00:03:42,989 --> 00:03:46,758 That's more than half my... height. 83 00:03:46,792 --> 00:03:49,160 So, uh, how did you meet? 84 00:03:49,194 --> 00:03:50,828 She's a backup singer in my band. 85 00:03:50,862 --> 00:03:52,597 [Laughing] Oh. 86 00:03:52,631 --> 00:03:54,132 Okay, so it's nothing. 87 00:03:54,166 --> 00:03:57,236 No, it would be like me sleeping with an extra, 88 00:03:57,270 --> 00:04:00,139 like "cop #1" or "hunky trucker." 89 00:04:01,003 --> 00:04:02,107 You don't understand. 90 00:04:02,141 --> 00:04:03,642 Of course I understand. 91 00:04:03,676 --> 00:04:05,977 You and I have an open relationship. 92 00:04:06,012 --> 00:04:07,279 What you do on the road 93 00:04:07,313 --> 00:04:09,648 or what I do on the set of the Lifetime Original Movie 94 00:04:09,682 --> 00:04:13,018 Truck Stop Waitress: The Alison McClaney Story 95 00:04:13,053 --> 00:04:16,255 has nothing to do with us. 96 00:04:16,290 --> 00:04:18,458 I'm gonna ask her to marry me. 97 00:04:20,795 --> 00:04:22,128 A backup singer? 98 00:04:22,163 --> 00:04:23,997 Well, she repeats everything I say. 99 00:04:24,032 --> 00:04:27,701 It's very affirming. 100 00:04:27,736 --> 00:04:29,536 All right, please, just no-- no jokes right now. 101 00:04:29,571 --> 00:04:31,605 I'm kind of reeling here. 102 00:04:31,639 --> 00:04:33,007 Okay, I'm sorry. 103 00:04:33,041 --> 00:04:34,875 What you and I have is incredible. 104 00:04:34,910 --> 00:04:36,010 But all you want is a weekend here 105 00:04:36,044 --> 00:04:37,278 and a night there. 106 00:04:37,312 --> 00:04:39,714 I know, that's what makes it so exciting. 107 00:04:39,748 --> 00:04:42,684 Yeah, and-- and this outfit you're wearing 108 00:04:42,718 --> 00:04:45,120 isn't making this any easier. 109 00:04:45,154 --> 00:04:46,956 But I need more than that. 110 00:04:46,990 --> 00:04:49,158 Natalya wants to be there every day. 111 00:04:49,192 --> 00:04:50,393 I mean, I asked you to marry me, 112 00:04:50,427 --> 00:04:51,427 and you turned me down. 113 00:04:51,461 --> 00:04:52,761 Well, of course. 114 00:04:52,796 --> 00:04:54,029 I can't go on the road 115 00:04:54,063 --> 00:04:55,864 and--and travel around with you in a bus 116 00:04:55,898 --> 00:04:58,600 and--and stay in motels and--and all that loud music. 117 00:04:58,634 --> 00:05:00,635 I mean, that is a young woman's game. 118 00:05:02,071 --> 00:05:05,840 Oh. 119 00:05:05,875 --> 00:05:08,042 [Crying] I'm devastated. 120 00:05:08,077 --> 00:05:10,844 Look at me. I'm actually eating chocolate. 121 00:05:10,879 --> 00:05:13,380 And it's the lowest form of chocolate. 122 00:05:13,415 --> 00:05:15,048 Fundraiser chocolate. 123 00:05:18,353 --> 00:05:21,355 Honey. 124 00:05:21,389 --> 00:05:23,691 I'm so sorry. I know it hurts. 125 00:05:23,725 --> 00:05:25,059 You know, even though Johnny wasn't always there, 126 00:05:25,093 --> 00:05:26,526 I thought he'd always be there. 127 00:05:26,561 --> 00:05:28,729 He was like my safety net. 128 00:05:28,763 --> 00:05:30,530 Maybe knowing you had a safety net 129 00:05:30,565 --> 00:05:33,166 was holding you back from finding someone wonderful. 130 00:05:33,200 --> 00:05:34,301 That's just something 131 00:05:34,335 --> 00:05:36,870 people who don't have safety nets say. 132 00:05:36,905 --> 00:05:39,240 That's true. 133 00:05:41,610 --> 00:05:42,944 You know what? 134 00:05:42,979 --> 00:05:45,146 This is crazy. No more wallowing. 135 00:05:45,181 --> 00:05:46,281 I have got to move on. 136 00:05:46,315 --> 00:05:47,582 Bravo, Victoria. 137 00:05:47,617 --> 00:05:50,351 And the best way to do that is to get revenge. 138 00:05:50,386 --> 00:05:52,886 I always "bravo" too soon. 139 00:05:52,921 --> 00:05:54,154 I know. 140 00:05:54,189 --> 00:05:55,789 I need to go to Johnny's recording tomorrow 141 00:05:55,823 --> 00:05:57,257 with a new boyfriend, 142 00:05:57,291 --> 00:05:59,092 someone who trumps rock star. 143 00:05:59,126 --> 00:06:00,727 How about George Clooney? 144 00:06:00,761 --> 00:06:01,994 - Ooh, that's good. - Mm-hmm. 145 00:06:02,029 --> 00:06:06,231 But does movie star beat rock star? 146 00:06:06,265 --> 00:06:09,067 Yes, that's the only problem with choosing George Clooney. 147 00:06:11,404 --> 00:06:12,938 Look, it has to be someone 148 00:06:12,972 --> 00:06:14,907 who will really make Johnny mad-- 149 00:06:14,941 --> 00:06:16,609 as mad at you as he is with Drago. 150 00:06:16,643 --> 00:06:19,011 [Gasps] That's it! Drago! 151 00:06:19,046 --> 00:06:22,416 Oh, that is gonna kill Johnny to see me with him. 152 00:06:22,950 --> 00:06:24,351 Guess who's hot for teacher. 153 00:06:24,386 --> 00:06:25,619 [Mumbling] It's chaos out here. 154 00:06:25,654 --> 00:06:28,022 I was totally like... And good news! 155 00:06:28,056 --> 00:06:29,090 Got so excited, out of the blue... 156 00:06:29,124 --> 00:06:31,625 Knee socks. 157 00:06:31,659 --> 00:06:33,127 Oh, my gosh. 158 00:06:33,161 --> 00:06:36,196 Of course I'll be your girlfriend. 159 00:06:43,578 --> 00:06:45,179 Look, I'm sorry. 160 00:06:45,213 --> 00:06:46,947 I don't know where the hell Drago is. 161 00:06:46,981 --> 00:06:48,582 Oh, I'm sure he had a good excuse. 162 00:06:48,616 --> 00:06:49,883 Perhaps he was out late last night 163 00:06:49,918 --> 00:06:51,785 with some beautiful woman. 164 00:06:51,819 --> 00:06:54,288 A woman whose identity could be surprising 165 00:06:54,322 --> 00:06:57,592 and potentially disturbing to you. 166 00:06:57,626 --> 00:06:58,826 I'm here! 167 00:06:58,861 --> 00:06:59,928 I'm here! 168 00:06:59,962 --> 00:07:02,397 History to be made. 169 00:07:02,432 --> 00:07:03,832 Where's Johnny Revere? 170 00:07:03,866 --> 00:07:06,268 I'm Johnny, you idiot. 171 00:07:06,303 --> 00:07:08,437 Whoa! Gee! 172 00:07:08,471 --> 00:07:12,441 Whoa, time is cruel. Just craggy. 173 00:07:12,475 --> 00:07:14,944 I got these bags carrying your drunken ass, 174 00:07:14,978 --> 00:07:16,478 like I'm about to do right now. 175 00:07:16,513 --> 00:07:18,580 Okay, guys, guys. 176 00:07:18,615 --> 00:07:20,549 Let's do this thing. 177 00:07:20,583 --> 00:07:21,683 Welcome, everybody. 178 00:07:21,717 --> 00:07:23,485 A time to chill is a song 179 00:07:23,519 --> 00:07:27,689 to promote peace and brotherhood in these contentious times. 180 00:07:27,724 --> 00:07:29,691 The world needs... 181 00:07:29,725 --> 00:07:31,493 If we could all just get... 182 00:07:31,527 --> 00:07:33,628 I mean, take... 183 00:07:33,663 --> 00:07:35,664 I mean, that's what it's all about. 184 00:07:35,698 --> 00:07:38,033 Right? 185 00:07:38,067 --> 00:07:40,202 Well said, Drago. 186 00:07:40,237 --> 00:07:42,038 Anyway, I can't think of a better project 187 00:07:42,072 --> 00:07:43,206 to bring us back together. 188 00:07:43,240 --> 00:07:45,108 And speaking of together, 189 00:07:45,142 --> 00:07:47,044 I know that America would be very interested to know 190 00:07:47,078 --> 00:07:48,279 that you have a new girlfriend 191 00:07:48,313 --> 00:07:50,381 who's young enough to be your granddaughter. 192 00:07:50,416 --> 00:07:52,851 So it's not creepy at all. 193 00:07:52,885 --> 00:07:54,219 And--and Drago, 194 00:07:54,254 --> 00:07:57,189 uh, I hear that you have a new special someone 195 00:07:57,224 --> 00:07:58,190 in your life. 196 00:07:58,225 --> 00:07:59,425 Oh, yeah, absolutely. 197 00:07:59,459 --> 00:08:01,927 Shout it from the rooftops. 198 00:08:01,962 --> 00:08:03,563 Viselnub. 199 00:08:05,566 --> 00:08:08,535 I'll just give everyone out there in TV land a hint. 200 00:08:08,569 --> 00:08:09,669 It's me. 201 00:08:09,704 --> 00:08:10,670 What? 202 00:08:10,705 --> 00:08:12,972 That's what I said. 203 00:08:13,007 --> 00:08:14,541 Viselnub. 204 00:08:14,575 --> 00:08:16,943 - Uh, Vic-to-ria. 205 00:08:16,977 --> 00:08:18,811 Viselnub. 206 00:08:18,845 --> 00:08:20,680 - Vic-- - Visel-- 207 00:08:20,714 --> 00:08:22,615 - toria. - Nub. 208 00:08:22,650 --> 00:08:24,150 - Victoria. - Viselnub. 209 00:08:24,185 --> 00:08:26,820 Oh, isn't he adorable? 210 00:08:26,854 --> 00:08:29,623 Okay, Frank, that's enough. I think we got it. 211 00:08:29,657 --> 00:08:31,057 Look, Victoria. 212 00:08:31,092 --> 00:08:33,360 You don't have to pretend to like this jerk 213 00:08:33,394 --> 00:08:34,594 just to get back at me. 214 00:08:34,629 --> 00:08:36,229 I'm not pretending. 215 00:08:36,264 --> 00:08:38,865 No, he and I have had a thing for each other for years. 216 00:08:38,900 --> 00:08:41,668 Number one in me spank bank. 217 00:08:41,703 --> 00:08:44,705 And you in mine, my love. 218 00:08:49,511 --> 00:08:50,912 Who in this room do you think 219 00:08:50,946 --> 00:08:53,114 has the most valuable hair? 220 00:08:53,148 --> 00:08:55,516 Put those away. Are you insane? 221 00:08:55,550 --> 00:08:57,885 But I need a lock of celebrity hair 222 00:08:57,919 --> 00:09:00,020 to auction off for my animal shelter. 223 00:09:00,054 --> 00:09:01,554 I-- 224 00:09:01,589 --> 00:09:05,691 Ohh, Bieber! 225 00:09:05,726 --> 00:09:08,794 The mother lode. 226 00:09:11,331 --> 00:09:13,131 Any sign of David Gates from Bread? 227 00:09:13,165 --> 00:09:14,466 I don't know what he looks like. 228 00:09:14,500 --> 00:09:16,101 Well, probably the same as he did, 229 00:09:16,135 --> 00:09:17,302 only 30 years older. 230 00:09:17,336 --> 00:09:19,304 I don't know what he looked like then. 231 00:09:19,338 --> 00:09:20,371 Seriously? 232 00:09:20,406 --> 00:09:21,672 Baby, I'm-a want you? 233 00:09:21,707 --> 00:09:23,308 "I wanna make it with you?" 234 00:09:23,342 --> 00:09:24,943 David Gates from Bread is famous. 235 00:09:24,977 --> 00:09:26,911 If you have to add the band he played with 236 00:09:26,945 --> 00:09:29,747 when you say his name, he's not famous. 237 00:09:29,781 --> 00:09:33,284 Nobody ever says "Sting from The Police." 238 00:09:33,319 --> 00:09:35,120 I'm sorry, ma'am. Mr. Bieber's busy. 239 00:09:35,154 --> 00:09:36,188 Oh, it's okay. 240 00:09:36,222 --> 00:09:39,458 I'm Justin's grandmother. 241 00:09:39,492 --> 00:09:42,427 His grandmother's 45. 242 00:09:42,461 --> 00:09:44,696 Okay, I'll level with you. 243 00:09:44,731 --> 00:09:48,099 I need a lock of his hair for my animal shelter. 244 00:09:48,134 --> 00:09:49,367 Do you know how many charities 245 00:09:49,402 --> 00:09:51,269 want a piece of Mr. Bieber? 246 00:09:51,304 --> 00:09:53,405 Ugh. I didn't think I'd have to do this, 247 00:09:53,439 --> 00:09:56,441 but check out these puppies. 248 00:09:58,845 --> 00:10:00,078 Please don't, ma'am. 249 00:10:00,112 --> 00:10:01,379 Well, I mean-- 250 00:10:01,413 --> 00:10:05,950 I mean, these are the puppies you'd be saving. 251 00:10:05,985 --> 00:10:09,254 Cupcake and-- and Frosting. 252 00:10:09,288 --> 00:10:11,656 Ooh, doo-doo woo-doo-woo-dee. 253 00:10:12,925 --> 00:10:14,492 Ooh, headset man. 254 00:10:14,526 --> 00:10:16,127 Do you know if David Gates is here? 255 00:10:16,161 --> 00:10:18,129 Uh, yeah, he's in the control room. 256 00:10:18,163 --> 00:10:20,197 Oh, my God. Thank you. 257 00:10:20,231 --> 00:10:21,432 Thank you. 258 00:10:21,466 --> 00:10:23,033 Who's David Gates? 259 00:10:23,068 --> 00:10:24,601 He's the president of the Minivan council. 260 00:10:24,636 --> 00:10:27,471 They're sponsoring this whole thing. 261 00:10:29,073 --> 00:10:30,307 - 'Scuse me. Hi. - Hello. 262 00:10:30,841 --> 00:10:32,943 You're David Gates from-- 263 00:10:32,978 --> 00:10:35,012 I--you're David Gates. 264 00:10:35,047 --> 00:10:36,480 Call me Dave. 265 00:10:36,514 --> 00:10:37,814 - I'm Melanie. - Mm-hmm. 266 00:10:37,849 --> 00:10:40,850 I think it's so great that you're doing this. 267 00:10:40,885 --> 00:10:42,285 Do you think maybe you'd sign my guitar? 268 00:10:42,319 --> 00:10:44,687 Well, I'm not really much of a musician. 269 00:10:44,721 --> 00:10:47,723 Oh, stop! 270 00:10:47,758 --> 00:10:51,427 Don't listen to the haters. 271 00:10:51,461 --> 00:10:55,330 That's, uh, one of those non-electric ones. 272 00:10:55,365 --> 00:10:56,398 Yeah. 273 00:10:56,432 --> 00:10:57,732 Oh, could you write, 274 00:10:57,767 --> 00:11:00,736 "To Melanie: I wanna make it with you"? 275 00:11:00,770 --> 00:11:03,038 Sure. 276 00:11:03,072 --> 00:11:05,207 You're a beautiful woman, Melanie. 277 00:11:05,242 --> 00:11:06,475 Thank you. 278 00:11:06,510 --> 00:11:08,210 I'd like to see you in one of my minivans. 279 00:11:08,245 --> 00:11:09,946 Oh! 280 00:11:09,980 --> 00:11:11,381 Well, in my fantasy, it's a Porsche. 281 00:11:11,415 --> 00:11:13,750 But okay. 282 00:11:14,284 --> 00:11:15,118 Thank you. 283 00:11:15,153 --> 00:11:16,853 - You're welcome. - Thank you so much. 284 00:11:16,888 --> 00:11:19,690 Um, could I ask for one more thing? 285 00:11:19,724 --> 00:11:21,558 I mean, you probably get asked this all the time, 286 00:11:21,592 --> 00:11:23,527 but can I give you a kiss? 287 00:11:23,561 --> 00:11:27,897 Does the Toyota Sienna have 12 cup holders? 288 00:11:31,302 --> 00:11:33,736 Does it? 289 00:11:33,770 --> 00:11:36,738 Hell, yeah. 290 00:11:36,773 --> 00:11:38,840 ♪ Hello ♪ 291 00:11:38,875 --> 00:11:40,242 ♪ what's up ♪ 292 00:11:40,276 --> 00:11:43,044 ♪ I love those boots ♪ 293 00:11:43,079 --> 00:11:44,479 How's it going? 294 00:11:44,513 --> 00:11:46,948 Well, I couldn't get any Bieber hair. 295 00:11:46,982 --> 00:11:49,784 That chick runs fast. 296 00:11:53,555 --> 00:11:55,590 Well, my plan's not working either. 297 00:11:55,624 --> 00:11:56,624 Neither is mine. 298 00:11:56,658 --> 00:11:58,126 I've yet to be discovered, 299 00:11:58,160 --> 00:12:00,195 even though I'm singing in everyone's face 300 00:12:00,229 --> 00:12:01,563 and being all cute and "adorkable." 301 00:12:01,597 --> 00:12:04,465 How come that works for Zooey Deschanel? 302 00:12:04,500 --> 00:12:07,102 - "Adorkable" is like short shorts-- 303 00:12:07,136 --> 00:12:09,637 ridiculous after 30. 304 00:12:11,373 --> 00:12:13,174 But back to me. 305 00:12:13,208 --> 00:12:15,777 Johnny's not buying that Drago and I are together. 306 00:12:15,811 --> 00:12:17,979 He just needs to see it with his own eyes. 307 00:12:18,014 --> 00:12:20,682 If the billion-dollar porn industry has taught us anything, 308 00:12:20,717 --> 00:12:22,184 it's that men are visual. 309 00:12:22,218 --> 00:12:23,919 And when a pizza is delivered, 310 00:12:23,954 --> 00:12:26,956 the topping is always sausage. 311 00:12:37,302 --> 00:12:39,603 Ooh, look at these oranges. 312 00:12:39,638 --> 00:12:41,438 So high in vitamin-- 313 00:12:41,473 --> 00:12:44,941 [singing high] ♪ "C" ♪ 314 00:12:44,976 --> 00:12:46,142 Verena, right? 315 00:12:46,176 --> 00:12:47,543 Sorry, dude. 316 00:12:47,577 --> 00:12:51,013 I really don't have time to sign autographs right now. 317 00:12:51,047 --> 00:12:53,782 Actually, I was hoping for an interview. 318 00:12:53,816 --> 00:12:57,185 I'm... Opal with the BBC World Service. 319 00:12:57,219 --> 00:12:59,220 Oh! 320 00:12:59,254 --> 00:13:01,990 I love the BBC. 321 00:13:02,024 --> 00:13:04,493 Um, I'm sorry, what did you say your name was? 322 00:13:04,527 --> 00:13:06,495 Opal. Opal... 323 00:13:06,529 --> 00:13:08,864 Winfrey. 324 00:13:08,898 --> 00:13:10,632 No relation. 325 00:13:10,667 --> 00:13:13,836 Would you care to demonstrate your six-octave range? 326 00:13:13,870 --> 00:13:15,170 A lot of people think 327 00:13:15,205 --> 00:13:16,906 it's a trick done in the studio. 328 00:13:16,940 --> 00:13:19,742 Not me, but credible sources. 329 00:13:19,777 --> 00:13:22,312 I would, but I'm resting my voice. 330 00:13:22,347 --> 00:13:24,281 Well, you heard it here first. 331 00:13:24,315 --> 00:13:25,482 She can't do it. 332 00:13:25,516 --> 00:13:26,883 This is Opal Winfrey with the-- 333 00:13:26,918 --> 00:13:28,085 Now, hang on a minute. 334 00:13:28,119 --> 00:13:29,552 [Clears throat] 335 00:13:29,587 --> 00:13:31,154 [Tenor range] ♪ United ♪ 336 00:13:31,189 --> 00:13:32,822 [Alto range] ♪ United ♪ 337 00:13:32,857 --> 00:13:34,324 [Soprano range] ♪ United ♪ 338 00:13:34,358 --> 00:13:38,228 [Super-soprano range] ♪ United ♪ 339 00:13:39,397 --> 00:13:41,866 Yeah. I counted four. 340 00:13:43,402 --> 00:13:44,702 [Giggling] Oh, Drago. 341 00:13:44,736 --> 00:13:46,037 You naughty boy. 342 00:13:46,071 --> 00:13:49,341 There's a room full of people next door. 343 00:13:49,375 --> 00:13:50,742 [Whispering] Victoria! 344 00:13:50,777 --> 00:13:51,844 People can hear you. 345 00:13:51,878 --> 00:13:53,045 The mic is on. 346 00:13:53,079 --> 00:13:55,915 I know. I turned it on so Johnny could hear. 347 00:13:55,949 --> 00:13:58,352 Unfortunately, Drago passed out, 348 00:13:58,386 --> 00:13:59,486 like, five minutes ago. 349 00:13:59,520 --> 00:14:01,957 I've had to play both parts. 350 00:14:03,991 --> 00:14:05,591 What are you smiling about? 351 00:14:05,626 --> 00:14:07,560 I made out with David Gates 352 00:14:07,594 --> 00:14:10,396 in this very room. 353 00:14:10,430 --> 00:14:11,730 [Gasps] Johnny's coming! 354 00:14:11,764 --> 00:14:14,199 Quick, put Drago back on top of me. 355 00:14:14,233 --> 00:14:15,800 Now what? 356 00:14:15,835 --> 00:14:17,635 Hide, hide! 357 00:14:18,904 --> 00:14:20,371 Oh, yes. 358 00:14:20,406 --> 00:14:21,806 Yes, Drago. 359 00:14:21,841 --> 00:14:24,643 [Imitating Drago] Oh, Viselnub. 360 00:14:24,677 --> 00:14:28,180 Viselnub, oh, you're so hot, Viselnub. 361 00:14:28,214 --> 00:14:29,448 Oh! Oh! 362 00:14:29,482 --> 00:14:32,584 Yes, yes. 363 00:14:32,619 --> 00:14:34,853 [Door slams] 364 00:14:34,888 --> 00:14:37,222 Well, did it work? Was he jealous? 365 00:14:37,256 --> 00:14:38,491 I don't know. I couldn't see anything. 366 00:14:38,525 --> 00:14:39,725 I was under the mixing board. 367 00:14:39,760 --> 00:14:43,496 I'm up! Did we shag? Was I good? 368 00:14:43,530 --> 00:14:45,332 Two girls. 369 00:14:45,366 --> 00:14:47,668 Was I in a sandwich? 370 00:14:49,804 --> 00:14:51,939 Not in a sandwich? 371 00:14:53,942 --> 00:14:58,213 [Squealing] ♪ United ♪ 372 00:14:58,247 --> 00:15:00,148 Didn't quite get there, did you? 373 00:15:02,217 --> 00:15:03,184 [Squawks] 374 00:15:03,218 --> 00:15:05,419 [Hoarsely] Oh, no. 375 00:15:05,453 --> 00:15:07,822 Vo--gone. Vo--duh-- 376 00:15:07,856 --> 00:15:09,890 What? What are you saying? 377 00:15:09,924 --> 00:15:12,159 She says she can't sing. 378 00:15:16,208 --> 00:15:18,609 Are you guys ready to rock? Huh? 379 00:15:19,143 --> 00:15:20,510 But first, let's thank our sponsor, 380 00:15:20,545 --> 00:15:21,812 the Minivan Ad council, 381 00:15:21,846 --> 00:15:24,280 and their president of marketing and strat planning, 382 00:15:24,815 --> 00:15:27,783 David Gates. 383 00:15:32,622 --> 00:15:34,524 Oh, my God. 384 00:15:34,558 --> 00:15:37,960 I take it you made out with the wrong guy? 385 00:15:37,995 --> 00:15:41,597 See, this is why you say, "David Gates from Bread." 386 00:15:42,331 --> 00:15:43,699 Quick announcement. 387 00:15:43,733 --> 00:15:45,935 Verena had to cancel due to throat problems. 388 00:15:45,969 --> 00:15:47,102 No! 389 00:15:47,137 --> 00:15:49,504 I'm here. Verena's here. 390 00:15:49,539 --> 00:15:50,973 I'm Verena. 391 00:15:51,007 --> 00:15:52,441 Great. 392 00:15:52,475 --> 00:15:56,144 We all know that's Joy, right? 393 00:15:56,179 --> 00:15:58,847 And cue playback. 394 00:15:58,881 --> 00:16:01,717 Try to stay in tune, you brain-dead freak. 395 00:16:01,751 --> 00:16:03,519 Didn't need brains to shag your girlfriend. 396 00:16:03,553 --> 00:16:06,054 ♪ Too many people ♪ 397 00:16:06,088 --> 00:16:07,589 ♪ raising their voice ♪ 398 00:16:07,624 --> 00:16:10,925 ♪ the world is so divided ♪ 399 00:16:10,960 --> 00:16:12,827 ♪ and isn't it time ♪ 400 00:16:12,861 --> 00:16:14,495 ♪ we all made a choice ♪ 401 00:16:14,529 --> 00:16:18,265 [Together] ♪ to sing as friends united ♪ 402 00:16:18,299 --> 00:16:19,766 - [Squawking] ♪ uni-- ♪ 403 00:16:19,800 --> 00:16:22,603 Cut! Stop the playback. 404 00:16:22,637 --> 00:16:24,004 You keep your hands off Victoria, 405 00:16:24,038 --> 00:16:25,105 you limey bastard. 406 00:16:25,139 --> 00:16:27,174 Oh, it's working. 407 00:16:27,209 --> 00:16:28,810 Oh, bloody hell, wanker. 408 00:16:28,844 --> 00:16:30,011 She's not your Viselnub. 409 00:16:30,045 --> 00:16:31,879 She is my veezelnub. Uh, Victoria. 410 00:16:31,914 --> 00:16:33,114 And I'm taking her back. 411 00:16:33,149 --> 00:16:35,550 There's no take-backs, you selfish pissant! 412 00:16:35,585 --> 00:16:36,719 You kicked me out of the band! 413 00:16:36,753 --> 00:16:38,387 You left the band. 414 00:16:38,421 --> 00:16:39,922 Wandered off in Amsterdam. 415 00:16:39,957 --> 00:16:42,425 You and Keith Richard, living in that windmill. 416 00:16:42,459 --> 00:16:43,425 Oh. 417 00:16:43,460 --> 00:16:44,660 You can turn it off. 418 00:16:44,694 --> 00:16:46,429 They're not talking about me any more. 419 00:16:46,463 --> 00:16:49,833 I'm gonna take a five. Don't touch anything. 420 00:16:49,867 --> 00:16:53,437 Oh, well, now I gotta touch something. 421 00:16:53,471 --> 00:16:55,172 Well, your revenge plan worked. 422 00:16:55,207 --> 00:16:56,941 Bravo. 423 00:16:56,975 --> 00:16:59,277 Oh, I got much more than revenge. 424 00:16:59,311 --> 00:17:01,145 I got my safety net back. 425 00:17:01,180 --> 00:17:03,415 And now Johnny and I can go back to the way things were, 426 00:17:03,449 --> 00:17:04,582 you know. 427 00:17:04,617 --> 00:17:05,817 I mean, I know that he wanted someone 428 00:17:05,851 --> 00:17:06,951 who'd be there all the time, 429 00:17:06,986 --> 00:17:08,453 but, you know, when you love someone, 430 00:17:08,487 --> 00:17:10,288 you have to make sacrifices. 431 00:17:10,323 --> 00:17:12,023 I'd certainly do that for him. 432 00:17:14,127 --> 00:17:15,093 Although, uh... 433 00:17:15,128 --> 00:17:16,895 [Sniffs] 434 00:17:16,929 --> 00:17:18,496 Clearly, I didn't on this occasion. 435 00:17:18,530 --> 00:17:20,831 I... 436 00:17:20,866 --> 00:17:23,066 I didn't even think of him at all. 437 00:17:23,101 --> 00:17:26,502 God, this was a terrible plan. 438 00:17:27,037 --> 00:17:30,138 Again, I "bravo" too soon. 439 00:17:31,274 --> 00:17:32,940 So, Melanie, m'lady. 440 00:17:36,478 --> 00:17:40,148 When this is all over, are we still going to Chili's? 441 00:17:40,682 --> 00:17:42,850 Listen, David Gates from... 442 00:17:42,885 --> 00:17:44,986 Marketing. 443 00:17:45,021 --> 00:17:47,288 I thought you were David Gates from Bread. 444 00:17:47,323 --> 00:17:48,656 I wish! 445 00:17:48,691 --> 00:17:50,125 Huge Bread fan. 446 00:17:50,160 --> 00:17:53,029 I'm a loafer for life. 447 00:17:53,063 --> 00:17:54,363 Really? 448 00:17:54,398 --> 00:17:55,531 Are you a Bread Head? 449 00:17:55,565 --> 00:17:58,535 Does the Toyota Sienna have 12 cup holders? 450 00:18:03,779 --> 00:18:04,912 I'm confused. 451 00:18:04,947 --> 00:18:06,313 I just want you to have what you need, 452 00:18:06,848 --> 00:18:08,715 which is someone who'll be there for you 453 00:18:08,750 --> 00:18:11,951 every day, and that's just not me. 454 00:18:11,986 --> 00:18:16,222 So you need to go back to Natalya. 455 00:18:16,256 --> 00:18:17,924 You did all that to get me back, 456 00:18:17,958 --> 00:18:19,458 and now you don't want me? 457 00:18:19,493 --> 00:18:22,327 We both know it's for the best. 458 00:18:22,362 --> 00:18:24,329 Wow. 459 00:18:24,364 --> 00:18:27,632 So this is really it for us? 460 00:18:27,667 --> 00:18:29,735 I guess so. 461 00:18:29,769 --> 00:18:34,473 But you'll always be in my spank bank. 462 00:18:34,508 --> 00:18:35,641 Do you even know what that is? 463 00:18:35,676 --> 00:18:37,877 No. 464 00:18:38,711 --> 00:18:41,114 Good. 465 00:18:41,148 --> 00:18:42,915 You know, I'm gonna write a song about you. 466 00:18:42,950 --> 00:18:45,151 Course, I won't be able to play it in concert 467 00:18:45,185 --> 00:18:47,587 'cause the fans just want to hear all the old stuff. 468 00:18:47,621 --> 00:18:49,456 [Chuckles] 469 00:18:49,490 --> 00:18:51,858 Good-bye, Johnny. 470 00:19:06,140 --> 00:19:07,107 What was I thinking? 471 00:19:07,141 --> 00:19:08,542 Natalya's not better for me. 472 00:19:08,576 --> 00:19:10,244 She's 22. 473 00:19:10,278 --> 00:19:13,047 She never even dialed a phone. 474 00:19:13,081 --> 00:19:16,284 What was I thinking, doing something unselfish? 475 00:19:16,319 --> 00:19:18,921 [Chuckles] Yeah. 476 00:19:18,955 --> 00:19:21,257 That's not the woman I love. 477 00:19:21,291 --> 00:19:22,892 Having you 20% of the time 478 00:19:22,927 --> 00:19:24,561 is better than having any other woman 479 00:19:24,595 --> 00:19:25,595 all of the time. 480 00:19:25,629 --> 00:19:27,831 Aww. 481 00:19:27,865 --> 00:19:29,566 Actually, when you add up the days, 482 00:19:29,600 --> 00:19:32,568 it's--it's really not even 20%, just... 483 00:19:32,602 --> 00:19:35,871 Oh, shut up. 484 00:19:35,905 --> 00:19:37,472 This is... I can't believe it. 485 00:19:37,506 --> 00:19:39,807 Viselnub's back with Johnny. 486 00:19:40,842 --> 00:19:43,244 There are plenty of fish in the sea. 487 00:19:43,278 --> 00:19:45,646 Especially for somebody famous like you. 488 00:19:45,680 --> 00:19:47,914 You are famous, aren't you? 489 00:19:48,649 --> 00:19:49,950 Yes, very. 490 00:19:49,984 --> 00:19:52,085 But it still hurts. 491 00:19:52,120 --> 00:19:54,020 Oh, of course it does. 492 00:19:54,055 --> 00:19:56,056 Come here. 493 00:19:56,090 --> 00:19:57,824 Oh. 494 00:19:57,859 --> 00:19:59,192 [Sighs deeply] 495 00:20:04,732 --> 00:20:05,733 [Snip] 496 00:20:05,734 --> 00:20:10,051 Sync, corrected by Alice www.addic7ed.com 497 00:20:10,101 --> 00:20:14,651 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 33900

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