All language subtitles for Hogans Heroes s02e20 Hogan and the Lady Doctor.eng

ANNOUNCER:
CBS presents this program in color.

( theme song playing )

Now, the question is,

does the beastly hand
need this,

or don't you?

What's the idea?

I want to think
about that card.

This place is finally getting
to you, huh?

( laughing )

Whatever gave you that idea,
Schultz?

They order us to blow up
a research laboratory

that's protected by half
the Gestapo monsters in Germany.

That is definitely not
a civilian operation.

It's true.

So why put a civilian
in charge?

Well, the brass must
have had good reason.

Since when?

Could you say you didn't receive
the orders, mon colonel?

Eh, it's too late.

When I got this from London,
I acknowledged it.

"Operation Hatchet:
civilian doctor in command."

That's plain enough.

Is it possible
to resign from a war?

Sure. It's called
desertion.

But nobody
approves of it.

We know the Krauts are working
on synthetic fuel in that lab.

So I guess it just figures
they'd send somebody

who knows something about it.

And he should be arriving
with Kinch anytime.

Let's go.

Schultz, you still here?

We're entitled to some privacy,
you know. Out.

I-I lost ten
straight hands.

I'm not going
until I win.

Which could take us
right through to the next war.

All right, what do
you need, Schultz?

The nine of diamonds.

Yeah, that's
what I need.

Ooh.

Gin!

Amazing.
All right, come on. Out!

But I'm on a winning streak.

Out!

Hey, Schultzy.

Ooh.
Ooh.

Good-bye.

Kinch, open up.

How'd it go?

Well, fine, Colonel.
Just fine.

Oh.

Gentlemen...

this is Hatchet.

Dr. Suzette Lechay.

Doctor?
Of science.

Madame Lechay.

She's very famous
in France.

Oh, merci bien.

Très bien, Madame.

Enchanté.

Enchanté.

When they said civilian,
they meant civilian.

The Krauts have guards
here and here.

And they've got a sentry posted
at the main gate,

which is hooked up to the lab
by telephone.

There's an eight-foot
electrified barbed wire fence

goes all around the place.

( whistles )
Sounds like a nice, homey place.

Could one dig under
the fence, say, at this point?

Excusez-moi, Madame Doctor.
Bloody impossible.

Yeah, we saved
the worst part for the last.

They've got land mines
planted 50 yards out,

and they go all around.

And booby traps.

Sounds like Fort Knox.

Getting into old
Fort Knox, sir,

would be like
falling off a log

compared to this caper.

Eh, "falling off the log?"

( speaking French )

Oh, oh, je comprende. Merci.

Hey, you know, I fell off a log
once when I was a kid.

Landed on my head,
and I was punchy for a week.

Are you sure it
was only a week?

( speaking French )

Save it, LeBeau.

You'll run the war
into overtime.

Since you fellas did
the reconnaissance,

any suggestions?
I've got one, sir.

Let's call the whole thing off
and have a nice cup of tea.

Right, Colonel.
We could never get in there.

Yeah, my feelings exactly.

It'd be suicide to try.

But I need only ten minutes
to get in there

and examine the plans
and set the explosives.

Sorry, Doctor,
it's off.

If the Boche develop
a synthetic fuel,

it may prolong the war
for years.

They may even win.

You heard
what he said.

They've got land mines,
a German specialty.

No one has to tell me
about the Germans.

When they took France,
I was captured

and sent back to Germany
to work for them.

I escaped,
and I've been hiding

in the underground from them
for over a year.

We could figure another
way to get into that lab.

There is.

By invitation.

What?

I will leave here.

I will permit the Germans
to capture me,

and then I will let them talk me
into working for them, huh?

And get yourself killed
at the same time.

Ah, my life has been
in danger many times.

Perhaps I've been spared
for this one important mission.

No, my original decision stands.

The job's off.

Colonel, the decision
is not yours.

Lady, may I remind you

I am the senior officer
of this camp?

And may I remind you
that for this mission,

you have been placed
under my orders?

Wow.
Holy...

Please, one war
at a time.

All right, you guys,
take a break. Get lost.

Yes, sir.

Lady, you're pushing me around,
and we're not even married.

If you will not help me
with this,

I will attempt
to accomplish it alone.

Alone?! That's crazy.

Why do they do this
to me? Why?!

Because you are
Colonel Hogan.

Lady, don't fill our little
tunnel here with soft soap.

And because they know

you are a good enough
soldier to follow orders.

All right.

You want to commit suicide,
who am I to stand in the way?

First problem: getting you
captured by the Germans, right?

Oui. That is correct.

All right. The boys have been
doing some clean up work

on a farm near here
for extra rations.

LeBeau will take you
out tonight and hide you.

Tomorrow we'll make sure
the Krauts find you.

Excellent.

Then you take it from there.

Okay? Satisfied?

Oui. Je suis contente.

Good.

Then I'll assume I'm dismissed,
Madame Commander.

Good night.

Colonel Hogan...

you forgot to, uh, salute.

Lady, you're not pushing,
you're shoving.

( blows whistle )

Lunch, everybody!

Half an hour lunch!

Lunch, everybody!
Half an hour lunch!

( laughs ):
The nicest time of the day.

Yep, Schultz, yep.

Yeah, dinner time
isn't bad either.

How about breakfast?

Oh, crazy about it.

( laughs )

Ooh.

Dieting again?

Just a little snack.

Hey, Schultz,
what's Kinch doing?

Don't you see I'm busy?
You better have a look.

Hey, you.

What's going on?

Who is in there?

Nothing, Schultz.
Nobody here.

Oh, nobody, nobody?

Go away, go
away, go away.

A-ha! You! You!

Come out! Out!

Out with you.

( prisoners complaining )

Who are you?

Do you live on the farm?

No, I was hiding.

I just asked this man
for some food.

Hiding, eh?
Oh, come on, Schultz, she's not doing anything.

Let her go.

( prisoners complaining )
Quiet!

Keep out of this!

Now, run away, quick.
Quick, quick, quick. Run away.

What?

Schultz, this is a fine time
to be Mr. Nice Guy.

You got to arrest her.

It's too much trouble.
They're going to ask questions.

I have to make a report.
Four copies.

Run away, quick, quick, quick,
quick, quick. Run away.

Schultz, you
can't do that!

What's going on here?

Just a minute ago,
you wanted me to let her go.

Achtung!

What's going on here?
Who is this woman?

Herr Kommandant,
she was in here.

She tried to escape,
but I arrested her.

Back! Everybody back,
back, back, back.

Back! Everybody quiet!

Back, back!

In case they attack,

I want to be ready.

Very good, Schultz.

I want this woman brought
to my office immediately

for questioning.

Jawohl, Herr Kommandant.

Schultz, you're really
a switch artist.

In wartime,
you have to be flexible.

Let's go.

Now, Hogan, who is this woman?

I have no idea.

I don't know, either.

I didn't ask you.

I-I thought you
might like to know.

KLINK:
Silence!

Now, why were you hiding,
and so close to Stalag 13?

Getting ready to assist Hogan
in an escape, perhaps?

You're just fishing
for information, Commandant.

And I'm about to catch
something.

Now, I'm convinced

that this woman has
a special reason

for being here
and you know that reason.

Now, start talking
or I promise you,

you and your men will get
30 days in the cooler.

On what charge?

Oh, I'll invent something.
Don't worry.

HOGAN:
Can't tell you what I don't know.

Commandant,

my name is really
Suzette Lechay.

I have been in hiding
for over a year.

A fugitive?

Gestapo?

Yes.

And this American officer
and his men--

they know nothing of me.

I simply asked them
for some food today.

And I saw them
give it to her.

I know, I know.

LECHAY:
And that is all there is to it.

Suzette Lechay?
Dr. Lechay?

Oui. I am Dr. Lechay.

Wow.

What, what? Doctor who?

HOGAN:
Lechay.

Just the best known research
chemist in all of France.

Do you realize what a catch
you've made, Commandant?

I knew it the moment
I heard that name.

And you-- what'd you have
to tell him for?

I could not let him
punish you

just because you tried
to help me.

Do you realize he'll
probably call Berlin now

and get a medal for this?

I will?

I will.

Hogan, I cannot give
you enough credit.

You really do
understand me.

Get me General Burkhalter
at once!

See? I told you.

And you would be working
on a very special,

top-priority research
project of ours.

Synthetic fuel?

How do you know
about that?

A-ha! A spy.
That's obvious.

Klink...

It is difficult even for Germans

to keep scientific research
a secret in wartime.

Boy, she's handling
those creeps like an expert.

Yeah. How'd you
like to be married to Madame Doctor

and try to keep
anything from her?

LECHAY:
Hiding from your filthy Gestapo pigs

is not the easiest thing
in the world.

I warn you not to address
General Burkhalter

in that tone
of voice again!

Klink, you are not
on the parade grounds.

Yes, sir.

Not a bad idea.

A nice, snow-covered
parade ground

on the Eastern front.

I've wasted enough time
with you, Madame.

Will you cooperate
with us?

No.

You leave me
no alternative.

I will turn you over
to the Gestapo, Madame Lechay.

Perhaps they can be
more persuasive.

I am not afraid.

Oh, yes, you are, Madame.

Very much afraid,
no matter how bravely you talk.

Klink, call Gestapo
headquarters.

Yes, sir, at once.

No, wait. You are right.

I-I could not face
that ordeal again.

Now you are being sensible.

What timing.

She is something.

I tell you, it makes me proud
to be a Frenchman.

Klink, you have adequate
quarters here for Dr. Lechay.

Yes, sir, they are
most comfortable,

I can assure you.

Schultz!

Jawohl, Herr Kommandant.

Barracks Nine
for Madame Lechay.

Maximum security
but comfortable.

Jawohl, Herr Kommandant.

If you please, Madame.

I promise you,
Dr. Lechay,

you will not regret
this decision.

We will win this war,
and then you...

Please, spare me
the speeches, General.

There have been
too many of them already.

Barracks Nine.

Don't we have a branch
tunnel leading into Nine?

Sure. It's an off ramp.

We're in business.

The Gestapo will
pick her up

every evening,
and she will be taken

to a building
not far from here.

Uh, the synthetic
fuel plant.

A research laboratory.

That's all you need
to know about it.

They will return her
in the daytime.

You will give her anything
she wants within reason.

Understood, sir.

And, uh, may I add that, uh, I
admired the way you handled her.

Thank you.

I, uh... I hope that I was
of some, uh, little help.

It would've been impossible
without you.

You're very kind.

And I'm glad to see
the general smiling.

What I just said was such a
pleasant thought: "without you."

Without me.

This is the timer.

Each one of
these notches

represents
five minutes,

so you can set it for
any time you want.

And, uh, these are
the detonators?

That's right.

You just stick this
right into the explosive,

and it attaches
onto this wire here

and goes right
to the timer.

Excellent.

You are very clever,
Sergeant.

Oh, thank you, ma'am.

And you know, from
what they tell me, so are you.

And I-I'd like to
talk to you about that sometime...

Can we delay the meeting

of the Mutual Admiration
Society, please?

Yes, sir.

I have
the new explosive.

It is in the hem
of my skirt here, huh?

Hey, how 'bout that?

Ooh, one thing
more, ma'am.

When you set the timer,
get out of there fast,

'cause the calibration's
not all that perfect.

I understand.
Well, that's it.

Not quite-- our junior
landlord's on his way.

Let's go!

( knocking )

( gasps )

Come in.

Madame Lechay.

Bonjour.

You, uh, seem
to be quite cozy here.

Well, yes, all the
comforts of home.

I hope you haven't
been digging any tunnels.

Unfortunately,
we're going to lose you.

The Gestapo has talked to me
on the telephone,

and, uh, starting tonight,

you will be living in the
laboratory building itself

with the other technicians.

But why?

It, uh, never occurred to me
to question the Gestapo orders.

Just have your things packed
when they come for you tonight.

Auf Wiedersehen.

Colonel,
they are going to... I heard him,

and that tears it, as
far as I'm concerned.

Forget it.

But our plans are
made for tonight.

And now all we need
are plans for your funeral.

Colonel...
Shh.

The Germans have been
working night and day.

They are very
far advanced.

And all of their
plans are there,

waiting to
be destroyed.

We could set
them back a year.

We must go
through with it.

You're, without a doubt,

the most
frustrating woman... There is another reason.

In order to gain
their confidence,

I had to give them
valuable advice.

I've actually helped
them to make progress.

Well, there's nothing
we can do about that now.

Colonel... must I, uh,
pull rank on you again?

( sighs ):
Suzette, listen.

You're a woman
with great gifts.

If you survive this war,

you can make
important contributions.

Don't throw
your life away.

You know how I feel.

I must go
through with it.

But I thank you for
caring, mon colonel.

Colonel...

You know something?

That's the first time I ever
kissed my commanding officer.

All right. Right here
there are no houses

and the road
dips slightly.

It looks like the best place
to stop the car.

Carter, you and Newkirk
handle that.

Yes, sir.
Right, sir.

LeBeau, you and I will
wait right about here.

We'll jump in
from this angle.

Good.

Boy, this is going to be
a rough one, Colonel.

You're not kidding,
but all we can do is try.

Pity you can't
talk her out of it, Colonel.

Well, I can't,

and I've tried
everything, believe me.

Everything.
Yes, we know.

You didn't get
all the lipstick off.

( speaking German )

Corporal
Schindler, sir.

I've captured
this man.

An Englander, huh?

Yes, I am an Englander,
you bloody Kraut.

What about it?
SCHINDLER: Quiet!

Can you give me
transportation to headquarters?

Get in the truck.
All right, hold it.

Who are you?

No quick moves, please.

You know what to do.
I'll take care of him.

Come on.

What are you doing?
Get back in the truck.

But I don't understand.
In the truck!

What are you going to do?

That's entirely
up to you, buddy.

You can get out of
this war real fast

the hard way, or
you can cooperate.

I do nothing.

Look, I was a terrible
shot when I was a cadet,

but I think I got a
better chance this way.

You're going to drive us
into that laboratory

nice and quiet,
or you're going to die right here.

Take all the time you
want to think it over...

like ten seconds.

All right, I'll take you in.

Five seconds to spare.

That's pretty good
for a super man.

Now move!

Move!

Heil Hitler.

Heil Hitler.

( both speaking German )

Who is this?

Major Hoganschmidt.

I'll have to see your pass.

Inspector General's
Office, Section Eight.

I will vouch for him.

Well, you may pass.

Heil Hitler.
Heil Hitler.

( gives order in German )

( light bulbs buzzing )

HOGAN:
Watch it.

LeBEAU:
Right.

You must be quiet.

There are technicians
working in there.

We won't bother them
if they don't bother us.

All of these files,
they must be destroyed.

We've got enough explosives
to blow up half of Berlin.

Get started.
Yeah.

( zipping )

Easy, boy.

( gasps )

Guten Abend,
Dr. Lechay.

I didn't expect
to find you here.

Oh, uh, Dr. Krull,
this is, um,

Major Hoganschmidt

of the Inspector
General's Office.

Heil Hitler.

Heil Hitler. Forgive me
for having interrupted.

Oh, that's
perfectly all right.

I'll be there
in just a moment.

Oh, yes.

Don't those guys
ever bother to knock?

How weird how they
have no manners at all.

Okay.

Set for five minutes,
and then up she goes.

All right, let's go.

Carter, this time,
you drive.

Captain,
you won't mind

sitting in the back,
will you?

I didn't think so.
Move.

( speaking German )

Heil Hitler.

Heil Hitler.
( phone rings )

Hallo. Leutnant Martin.

Ja.

Ja?

That's trouble. Take off.
( yelling in German )

Carter, pull
over a little

in case that laboratory
wants to pass us.

Oh, it's not going
to pass us, sir.

It's going to go straight up.

See, with that kind
of structure, the compression...

Carter, forget
it, forget it.

Keep driving.

( knocking )
Schultz.

Commandant.

KLINK:
Yes, Hogan, what is it?

I have a list
of complaints here, sir.

I'm not listening
to complaints today.

Tomorrow?
No.

No, no, no, no!

Oh, by the way, sir, uh...

we haven't seen
Dr. Lechay around

for the last couple days,
and we were wondering...

Dr. Lechay is gone,
and she will not be back.

Would it, uh,
have anything to do

with the explosion
we heard the other night?

There's nothing
I can say about that.

That's top secret matter.

Besides that,
it's none of your bus...

Just a minute.

What is that
on your face?

Lipstick.

In a P.O.W. camp?

Herr Kommandant,
there are no women here.

I would be the first one
to know.

You see, we were
rehearsing a play

one of the boys wrote.

We have to keep
busy, sir.

A play? What about?

Well, you see,

there's this
lady scientist

who's captured
by the Germans.

Those are the bad guys.

But she escapes
to England

with the help
of the P.O.W.s--

the good guys.

Now, there's this crazy
commandant of the camp

who keeps running
around yelling...

That's all! Dismissed!

You'd be great for the part.

He really would.

( grunts )

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