All language subtitles for Hogans Heroes s02e01 Hogan Gives a Birthday Party.eng

ANNOUNCER:
CBS presents this program in color.

( theme song playing )

So, this is the refinery
at Stuttheim, huh?

Yeah, we were shot down
short of there, Colonel.

We crashed
about here.

Once you
get through,

one plane could blow up
the whole place.

Yeah, but nobody
gets through.

Yeah, three rings of ack-ack,
and Messerschmitts all over.

Yeah, making it
rough, all right.

CARTER:
Guard coming, Colonel.

It's Schultz.

All right, keep working.

But won't he spot us,
Colonel?

Schultz? Anything's possible.

LeBEAU:
Okay, Colonel...

Hi.
Hi.

LeBEAU:
Try this coat on for size.

Oh, disregard me.

I'm not here.

NEWKIRK:
And waist, 32.

Oh, excuse me, please.

Oh, please,
Colonel Hogan,

I am not here.

Have you ever heard, Schultz,

of a man's home
being his castle?

What am I doing?

It's a rotten war,
Schultzy.

The only thing
that keeps us going

is the beautiful

human beings
that we meet along the way.

Now, don't spoil all that
by spying.

Spying-- me?!

Don't be too tough on him, men.

Klink just had a meeting
of the guards, right, Schultz?

You're right.

But, uh, I'm
pleased to announce

that everything
here is in order.

By my count,
all are present.

Even two over.

Good.

Colonel Hogan.

Two over!

Who, who are
those two men?

Your side shot them down,
Schultz.

Colonel Hogan,
they're prisoners.

They have not
been processed in!

Only because
they're going right out again.

Ah, this
is an escape route.

Please, Colonel Hogan,
I insist! I must...

You really want to know
what this is, Schultz?

No! But...

This is a refinery at Stuttheim.

You know how many B-17s
have been shot down

trying to take out
that refinery?

Colonel Hogan...
62.

You know what that represents
in dollars

to the American taxpayer?

But Colonel Hogan...
Do you realize

what it costs
each one of us

here at Stalag 13

to process these men
through here,

send them back to England

just so you
can shoot them down again?

Colonel Hogan, I know nothing
about the refinery.

I don't care about the refinery.

I ride a bicycle.

I would even blow up
the refinery myself,

but I must insist

that those two men

are reported.
That's it.

Wha-wha-wha-wha,
wha-wha-wha-wha, what's it?

You've just given me

the whole operation--

have the Germans
blow up their own refinery.

( groaning )

Please, I know nothing
about it!

I only know that these two men
must be reported!

All right,
Schultz,

have it your way.

But when that refinery
is blown up

and it comes out
to have been your idea...

( frustrated groan )

Colonel Hogan to see
you, Herr Kommandant.

Please, I'm much too busy
to see Hogan.

Just wanted to say
congratulations, Commandant,

and no one
deserves it more.

And that's from
the heart, sir.

Well, thank you,
but, but...

Hasn't even put
them on yet.

How characteristic of
the man, Fraulein Hilda.

Put what on?

Same modest, self-
effacing man he was

before he made general.

General? What makes you think
that I've made general?

HOGAN:
You haven't?

Well, I just assumed
when I heard

that Lingenfelder
of Stalag 16 was promoted.

Lingenfelder, a general?!

When I was a colonel,
he was a sergeant!

I'm terribly sorry, sir.

My record is far superior.

Now, from his stalag,
they fly away like pigeons.

From here, not one escape.

It's probably
that experimental work he's doing.

It's the flashy kind of thing
that looks good in Berlin.

What experiment?
What kind of experiment?

Well, I believe he measured
the prisoners' thumbs,

the idea being to prove

the German soldiers
had longer thumbs.

Oh. What would that prove?

I don't really know.

( annoyed grunt )

To think that they
would overlook my record

to promote a,
a thumb measurer.

Well, let's talk
about something else.

What? Why should I want
to talk to you about anything?

I don't blame you for
being down, Commandant,

about the
Lingenfelder matter.

And, of course, you
being a Luftwaffe man,

you probably feel terrible
about what's happening.

What is happening?

Well, the pasting
they're taking.

And funny thing, too.

Yes? Why do you
find it so funny?

Well, from what I've seen
of the Allied fliers in camp,

the Luftwaffe men seem superior.

Well, of course
they're superior.

Well, if that'll be all, sir?

Hogan, wait, wait.

Fraulein Helga,
come in here, please.

Take a memorandum.

Jawohl, Herr Kommandant.

By George, this
sounds important.

All right, now,

by scientific testing,

I propose to establish
once and for all

the man-to-man superiority
of the Luftwaffe

over the Allied fliers.

What a fantastic idea!

How'd you ever think of that?

I don't know, Hogan.

It just came to me.

Fantastic, sir, fantastic.

Yes, Hogan, it is.

Of course, I have had every
cooperation from Berlin.

As a matter of fact,

( chuckling ):
rumor has it that I'm being thought of

as one of the Luftwaffe's
bright young men.

Oh, I can see that;
they naturally would.

Berlin is sending
a bomber crew for the project.

They're even
sending a general.

You know, I might venture
to assume, sir,

that the name Klink
is being bandied about

the dinner table
at Berchtesgaden.

Oh, oh, please,
I'm sure the Fuhrer is much too busy.

That's right.

Single-handed, he runs
the whole Russian front,

the Italians
give him such a headache,

and North Africa
is nothing but bad news.

And the Allied bombers--
they are...

Schultz! Are
you through?!

Boy, am I through.

Now, here, Hogan, is another
example of German ingenuity.

A replica of the controls
of a Heikel bomber.

Now, the pilot
moves the controls.

He can go up, down
or to the side.

But, Colonel, Klink, this is
a German instrument panel.

It's an unfair test.

Naturally, the German pilots
are going to look better.

Naturally.

You mean...

The aim of a
research project, my dear Hogan,

is not to discover new facts.

We already know the Luftwaffe
personnel are superior.

Here, we are merely furnishing
scientific proof.

But surely, we'll have a chance
to get acquainted with this.

When you take the test,
there'll be plenty of time.

You know, every time
I come face-to-face

with this cruel German cunning,

I always wonder
why my side is winning.

Psst.

Hey, Schultz.

Step aside a
second, will you?

Of course.

Thanks.
I got it.

You can move back now.

Danke.

Look it over, Lieutenant.

This is going to be your home
for the next 12 hours.

Well, I don't know, Colonel.

I think I can learn enough
to fly it to England,

but to bomb
Stuttheim first...

Look at it this way.

I think there's
a captaincy in it for you.

Kinch.

Oh, right here, Colonel.

Lieutenant Hardy here
is going to be with you

for a crash course
in German radio.

Instruments,
transmission,

recognition signals--
everything.

Will do.

And don't keep
him too long.

He's also got to study
the navigation instruments

and the bomb site.

Colonel, I don't think
there's going to be enough...

You have a previous
engagement, Lieutenant?

Well, no, sir.

Okay.

Any questions?

Yes, just one, sir.

How do we steal
the airplane?

Routine.

Come with me.

This is plans and training.

We have it all worked
out, mon Colonel.

Piece of cake, sir.

The airstrip is here.

And a Heikel bomber will
come in tomorrow morning.

Now, we do it
tomorrow night.

They should have
a couple of guards

in from the other camp.

We take care
of them easy.

And we have a tunnel
entrance right here,

so the distance
is not too bad.

Mm-hmm.

The only sticky detail is,
uh, lugging the bombs.

Hold it.

You mean we have to
take our own bombs?

Well, fair is fair.

The Jerries are
supplying the bomber.

Where's Carter?

Coming,
Colonel.

It's a modification
of the German design,

but I think I've made
a few improvements.

Can you get three more
of these things ready

by tomorrow night?

Oh, sure.

Uh, Colonel, there's no way

I can be around
when they go off?

No, Carter.

Yeah, okay.

It's kind of like
sending your own child

off to war without you.

Stiff upper lip.

Ah! General Biedenbender!

Hogan, call your
men to attention!

They are at attention.

Ah, Klink, you ready?

Yes, sir.
Good, good.

And, uh, this would be...?

Colonel Hogan,
senior prisoner

of war officer
reporting, sir.

Colonel Robert Hogan.

Yes, shall we proceed
with the inspection?

( humming )

You like the climate here,
Hogan,

or do you prefer,
uh, Indianapolis?

I've never cared much

for the climate
there either, General.

Uh, General Biedenbender,

have you met
Colonel Hogan before?

Never, never, but I know him
inside and outside.

I see.

You are surprised,
Colonel Hogan, huh?

( chuckling ):
Don't bother to answer.

I, I know.

Tell me more, General.

Oh, gladly.

Uh, Klink,
you have planned

a big celebration
for tonight, haven't you?

A celebration? Ye... a-a
celebra... a c-celebration?

For such
an important birthday.

A b-birthday?

( laughing ):
Oh, yes, of course.

We've been preparing
for months, Herr General.

Uh, the Fuhrer's birthday?

No, Klink--
Colonel Hogan's.

( gasping )

It is my birthday.

Ja.

( chuckling softly )

I should end the mystery,
Colonel Hogan.

You see, I am the reason

you are now here
a prisoner of war.

Well, thanks.

( laughs ):
It's nothing.

No, when the bombing raids
of the squadron you commanded

started to become
slightly annoying to the Third Reich,

I was assigned to study
your tactics, Colonel,

to get inside your head.

So, I learned everything
about you-- everything.

And then I begin
to, uh, to probe,

to, uh, search
for a weakness.

Loud ties.

No, no, your tactical
planning, Colonel.

Brilliant, yes, but at
times, over-elaborate.

So, I was able
to predict precisely

the plan of your last
bombing raid on Hamburg,

in which you were shot down,
and I...

( chuckling ):
I was shot up to General.

A little joke, Klink.

( laughing )

Well, as long
as it wasn't a total loss.

No, and I've kept an eye
on you ever since, Hogan.

Yes, even while you
were here in prison camp.

Uh, Klink, this idea
of a research project--

this idea was not suggested
to you by Colonel Hogan?

Oh, of course not,
Herr General...

was it?

Yes, Klink.

Yes, I recognize instantly
the Hogan touch.

Over-elaborate planning.

Mm-hmm, a clever device
to get an airplane

within reach,
which you would then steal

and, uh, all escape to England.

Uh... ah, you, uh,
you are crestfallen, yes?

Uh, no, sir.

I just have a naturally
crestfallen face.

( clearing throat )

It is disquieting, Hogan,

to have someone
inside your head, yes?

( chuckling softly ):
Huh?

My airplane
will be under 24-hour guard.

Night and day,
50 troopers, automatic weapons.

So, you would be better
starting up

( chuckling ):
some other little plan,

which I shall know
before almost you do yourself.

Ah, Klink, shall we, uh, get
on with the research project?

And, uh, move out the men.

Yes, sir!
Of course, Herr General.

Achtung!

Right face!

Forward, march!

What do we do
now, Colonel?

We're fighting against
a ruddy crystal ball.

Yeah, sounds
kind of spooky to me.

What'll I do with
my bombs, Colonel?

Carter...

Forget it, sir;
I'm sorry.

You've got your
own problems.

I can assure you, General
Biedenbender, that...

Yes, what is it?

Colonel Hogan requests
an audience, Herr Kommandant.

We're much too busy.
Send him in, Hilda.

Send him in!
You may go Fraulein Hilda.

Stay, Hilda.
Stay!

My congratulations
on the test today, General.

We didn't have a chance.

Naturally.

Great shot in the arm
for German morale.

Didn't do
much for ours.

Hogan, what
is it you want?

Whatever you're
drinking.

( laughs )
Hogan!

Very good.

Colonel Hogan's had time
to hatch up

another one of his
little gambits. Yes?

Nothing like that at all, sir.

I was wondering if--

to celebrate
your victory today--

you and your men would
care to join us

in our barracks tonight
for dinner.

With the Fraulein
Hilda, of course.

Fraulein Hilda, of course.

Simple prison fare.

You forget, Hogan,
I'm inside your head. Yeah?

( chuckles )

Herr General,
what is it?

What is he planning?

Well, Hogan, the plan
is almost too simple.

Once we are inside the prison
barracks, they overpower us,

use me as a hostage, and, uh,
make their escape.

Not so?

I deny most emphatically,
General, that I...

Ah-ah-ah.

I guess you
hate me for it, sir.

( laughing ):
Oh, no,

not at all, Hogan!

Not at all!

I find your little schemes very,

uh... stimulating.

So you shall join us
for dinner tonight

in Colonel Klink's quarters,

and, uh, Fraulein Hilda,
of course.

Yes, sir.

I don't deserve it, sir.

Ah, you forget again, Hogan.

It is your birthday.

Smile!

You are fantastic, sir.

You mean, he really
fell for that, Colonel?

Sure, but we've
got some work to do.

Colonel, I've got
to hand it to you.

I would have said that general
didn't have a single weakness.

No, just booze, girls,
and the feeling that he's always right.

The normal weaknesses.

Look, I need you two
guys to get me some Luftwaffe uniforms

for Karis and
Hardy, all right?

Right Colonel.
Carter?Yeah.

I want you to get
those bombs of yours

out to the end of the tunnel,

and we're gonna
have to leave one.

We got a big crew.

We're all going
out, Colonel?

Look at the way
we did today on those tests.

We need some flying time.

Oh, you disappoint me,
Colonel Hogan.

Here we have dined together,
had a little coffee,

and now some schnapps, and, uh,
you've not come up

with one single little plot,
one scheme.

Oh, you misjudge
me, General.

Colonel Klink will give me
a character reference.

A model prisoner, right, sir?

Uh, there have been
some strange things here

from time to time, sir,
but never an escape.

You see?

Make no mistake, Herr Klink,

you have an eagle in your cage.

An eagle?

BIEDENBENDER ( laughs ):
Yes.

Most resourceful,
but most dangerous.

When I get back
to Berlin, Hogan,

I shall still be
keeping an eye on you.

And you can do it, sir.

When are you going?

Hmm? Why?

Oh, no reason.

No reason at all.

Not before tomorrow?

( laughs )

I shall leave tonight.

But-But Herr General,

I thought you would stay
at least until...

And so did Colonel Hogan.

Oh, no.

He's planning some action
for tomorrow.

I know this man.

But Herr General,
he is a prisoner.

Prisoner, schmizner.

Makes no difference.

Klink, call your aide.

I'm leaving for Berlin tonight.

KLINK:
Of course, Herr General.

Schultz?

Schultz, I...

I'm-I'm sorry,
Herr Kommandant...

I was...
I was in the kitchen.

You are always
in the kitchen.

Sergeant, tell my men
to get aboard the plane,

dismiss the guards,

have the crew prepare
for takeoff.

I am flying to Berlin tonight.

It shall be done,
Herr General.

Schultz, take
me back to my barracks.

It's on your way.

I'm sorry I
won't be able to see you

to your
plane, sir.

That's all right, Hogan.

I, uh... I'm sure

Fraulein Hilda will fill in
for you very nicely.

You win again.

BIEDENBENDER:
Hogan?

I hope I haven't spoiled
your birthday party.

You are a
devil, sir.

( chuckles )

I try.

Don't bother
to notify the crew, Schultz.

They'll meet you
at the plane.

Oh, please,
Colonel Hogan.

It will be
worth my life!

You're right,
of course, Schultz.

I am?

Yeah, the jig's up.

This man can read my mind.

I'll be a better person inside

when I make a clean breast
of everything

that's been going on
around here.

Mm, please,
Colonel Hogan.

You won't
mention my name?

Yeah, but I'll recommend
leniency.

Oh, please, Colonel
Hogan, please.

The crew will meet
me at the plane?

Word of honor.

( sighs )

You don't care which crew,
do you?

Colonel Hogan...

This thing
really works.

Pilot to navigator.

Come in, navigator.

It all checks out here,
Colonel, so far.

Roger. Come in,
bombardier.

I found a button, Colonel.

Just tell me when.

Not now, Carter.

Yes, sir.

Uh, no, sir.

Yes, sir.

SCHULTZ:
Colonel Hogan?

Colonel Hogan?
Yeah?

Colonel Hogan, please.

A man with five children cannot
be flying around in the air.

We can't afford to
leave you, Schultz.

I'm sorry.

Oh, please,
Colonel Hogan.

I won't say a word.
Not one word.

Oh, please, Colonel Hogan!

Are we already in the air?

Oh!

I can't look.

We're waiting for
Biedenbender, Schultz.

Don't worry.

We'll bring you back

as soon as we
bomb the refinery.

Oh, I cannot stand bombs.

I have been told
that by doctors.

I can even get you a letter.

Oh, please...

Too late, Schultz.

Here comes
Biedenbender.

Newkirk, LeBeau,
get ready.

You're not going
to kidnap a general!

All right,
here he comes.

Hogan, I see nothing!

I know nothing...

Thank you for a wonderful
evening, General.

And good-bye.

Ah, no, not
good-bye, Hilda.

Au revoir.

Hmm?

Till we meet again.

You see, the activities
of Colonel Hogan

will need constant
watching.

And at close range.

And by me personally, hmm?

Au revoir.

Au revoir, Liebchen.

( humming )

What's...?

( Biedenbender shrieks )

All secure here, Colonel.

Uh, welcome
aboard Stalag 13 Airlines.

Anything we can do
to make your flight more comfortable,

please feel free
to call upon us.

Thank you.

( grunts )

Colonel Hogan is your pilot,
we are your stewards,

and Sergeant Carter
is your bombardier.

Bombardier?

Wait!

How about it, Kinch?

Stuttheim?

That's how I make it, Colonel.

The refinery should be below us
in about...

15 seconds.

Did you hear that, Carter?

You bet I did, Colonel. Now?!

No, not now.

Hold on, Carter.

Easy, boy.

Steady, boy.

All right, Carter.

Get ready, Carter.

Now, now,

now!

( bombs whistling )

( explosion )

Let's get
out of here.

Ah, you'll make it
all right, Lieutenant.

We've alerted the
RAF to look for you.

Oh, I know we'll make it
all right, Colonel,

but why don't you go back
to England with us?

Don't tempt me.

Unfortunately,
there's a war going on.

Good luck.

Thanks.

HOGAN:
All right, fellows, let's...

Hey, Colonel Hogan,
I'm too old to parachute jump.

Never too old, Schultz.
Come on.

Colonel Hogan,
I'm too big to parachute jump.

Now there you have a point.

Are we all set?

We're over Stalag 13 in...
30 seconds.

All right, now, everybody
land outside the fence.

We don't need showoffs.

Open the hatch, let's go.

Now, Schultz...

( whimpering )

Listen to
me, listen.

All you got
to do is jump,

count ten, and
pull the ring.

Off you go.

( yells )

How about nine or eight?

Come on, Schultz.

( screams )

Just my luck,
I'll meet him on the way up.

Go.

Go. Carter,
come on.

Yes.

Let's go, Chief.
Out.

All right, Hardy,
keep him covered, huh?

All right.

General, you'll like England.

It's a fun place.

Cannot understand it.

I-I just cannot.

You'll have time
to figure it out.

Oh, General,

you probably know
what I'm gonna ask you.

No, I do not.

What?

Don't you want
to wish me Happy Birthday?

You are a devil, Hogan.

I try.

I want answers,
and I will have answers.

Now...

a Gestapo investigating team
is on its way here.

Do you know what that means?

Something happened?

The impossible has happened.

General Biedenbender took off

in his own plane last night,
apparently alone,

bombed the refinery
of Stuttheim,

then defected to England.

Well, they say,
if you drink, don't drive.

( grunts ):
Schultz.

Y-Y-Yeah,
Herr Colonel.

You were ordered
to call the crew of that plane.

They were not called.

Why?

Herr Kommandant, I...

Biedenbender countermanded
the order.

Right, Herr
Kommandant.

But he was so loyal,
so dedicated.

Maybe he heard something.

What?

You heard something?

What?

After the Gestapo goes.

After the Gestapo goes?

You know they have ways
of getting things out of a man.

Yes.

Of course. I know.

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