Original subtitles

Fuck you.

Fuck you.

I’m not going to pick you up.

This life sucks.

This Kolkata…

Cinema…

Industry…

everything sucks.

So today,

I’ve decided to leave.

How many months’ rent’s still due?

Remember?

Hmm.

Who will pay?

Your Mumbai’s Karan Johar or Hollywood’s

Tan tana tan tan?

Are you talking about Tarantino?

Shut up.

If given money, can you make a super duper hit film like Swapan Saha?

Tarantino!

Listen,

pay the rent within two days.

Huh?

Not huh. Hah.

Otherwise,

with a broom…

This city,

does not deserve me.

This audience does not deserve me.

There’s no value of my talent here.

Aaah!

Couldn’t do what he was trying to do and now…

Shut up.

Please have this.

Head has swollen up like a potato.

Is it paining a lot?

A little.-Hey, come on. What the hell, man?

It wasn’t expected from you, CD.

Then don’t expect.

understand what an artist goes through in such situations, buddy.

Today morning Jibon Babu was very rude to him.

Now even this chair is broken,

He will scold us again.

We will make something up.

No one has to say anything.

I’ll manage everything.

MTV move your legs.

Issh,

Show me where are you hurt?

Actually the fans in our house are so high up,

that you have trouble reaching.

Oh no. -Your head’s hurt.

From next time, use a rope instead of a towel.

The towels keep slipping.

Isn't it? - Yes.

I won’t pick up. I’ll not. I’m not here.

Hello?

Who?

Chitrabhanu Dutta?

Chitrabhanu Dutta.

He’s asking for Chitrabhanu Dutta.

There’s no one by this name here.

Very strange name.

Are you sure?

What’s your name?

Ashrafi.

The entire world knows this, Kinky.

Might be Choco’s.

No.

My name’s

Kajol Chakraborty.

Hey, CD.

What’s your proper name?

Huh?

Name.

Um.

Chitrabhanu.

Told you. Here. Talk.

Huh?

Bro,

whose call?

Producer’s.

Huh?

Cinema.

Cinema!

Cinema!

Cinema!

CD, you’ve become DVD.

Cinema!

CD, you’ve become DVD.

CD, you’ve become DVD.

Our CD has become DVD.

CD, you’ve become DVD.

But isn’t

CD a little backdated?

Yeah, seems so.

My real name is Chitrabhanu Dutta.

My friends have shortened it into CD.

Yeah, that.

Today’s youngsters are obsessed with shortening.

Yes, you’re right.

It’s very sad.

But,

since shortcuts are the trend,

we need to follow the trend.

Yeah.

That’s also true.

Do you know what this trend thing is?

Huh?

Hmm.

This can’t be.

I’m telling you this can’t happen.

Oh, you idiot,

Huh?

I keep telling you this can’t happen.

And that girl with the dragon mehendi.

She’s a badass.

But

these are Bhojpuri-dubbed Hollywood movies. - These are super-hit.

This is called trend.

I make original ones too.

“Sister-in-law in jeans”.

“Hey, dude, fall in line”.

And that…

can you make films like “Haunting sister-in-law” and “Burning Youth”?

Huh?

I think you can.

I’ve seen your work.

You’ve seen my work? Where?

In music videos? -No,

you did that fat bald guy’s wedding video, no?

One which you didn’t name?

Wedding?

That’s not a movie.

That was when my landlord got married a few days ago,

and Irecorded some of the rituals. Then uploaded on YouTube.

Those are not creative works.

You thought they were creative?

Oh, that was creative.

Very creative.

Yeah? -Yeah.

Very hot girl.

Make her your heroine and I’ll produce your film.

She is our… I know her very well.

Was heroine in our film.

Millie Paul.

Did brilliant acting but,

ran away with the money before completing the dubbing.

How can that happen?

What do you mean how can that happen?

It happens like it happens.

You’re making a mistake.She just arrived in Kolkata from Krishnanagar after her marriage.

Oh, there’s no Krishna-Radha in this.

Go and look carefully.

She has a tattoo on her leg.

Get the girl with the tattoo,

and I’ll make you the super director of “Haunting Sister-in-law”

3 lakhs remuneration.

Without TDS.

What’s up, dude?

When’s the shoot?

First tell who’s the heroine?

What’s wrong, dude?

What happened!

Hah, one meeting swelled your ego? -Really.

Hey, bro. Don’t you need music for your film? I composed a really soulful note.

“You’re a table tennis board and I’m ping-pong.

You’re the lost princess and I’m King Kong.”

You’re the haunted sister-in-law, don’t get it wrong.

Don’t try to steal my rhythm, baby.

Hey, shut up!

Has anyone of you seen a tattoo?

Of course.

Here, on your hand.

I’m not talking about me.

I’ve seen,

yes.

A little below the throat.

A little above the chest.

What the fuck, man.

Hey, please, man. Be serious.

No one’s talking about any of us. -I’ve seen one somewhere else.

Where?

When did you see?

How did you see?

Did you go to give bra-panty?

Hey,no.

Dildo.

Hey!

I mean, I have to keep everything. Have to supply according to requirement.

She has to make do with a dildo?

So many of us guys…she can just call.

Hey,

if there actually is a tattoo, none of us saw it yet Kinky did?

Just a second.

Who’re you talking about?

Who’re you talking about?

Madhurima Goswami.

My old client.

Why?

Can you please explain me what’s going on here?

Then listen.

This Uma actually is Millie.

Never.

Uma can never become Millie.

You Bengalis have no respect in your hearts.

There’s respect.

If Uma doesn’t have tattoo, there’s full respect.

Just because of a tattoo you guys are looking down on her?

You guys don’t think of people as people.

Yuck, Bengalis, yuck.

Shame on you, guys, shame on you.

Hey, don’t try to teach love to me.

One tattoo makes a lot of difference.

Then okay. There’s no tattoo.

And if there is one,

I’ll get one too

When our soldiers are fighting at the borders,

what’s a tattoo to it?

You guys are diverting from the main point.

The main point is whether she has a tattoo on her leg or not.

Has any of you seen it?

There is.I’ve seen it.

You’ll now see tattoos on Holy Cow’s face.

Hey, shut up, you Fanny medium pacer.

First learn fast-bowling then come and talk

There is. There is a tattoo.

On her leg.

More specifically,

on her left leg.

How did you see?

You lost consciousness while opening only one button on her back.

How did you see where anything is?

Because I have those eyes, you duffer undergarments!

There’s a theory called Ocean Studies,

where you can look at a person’s eyes & hands & tell what they have on their bodies.

Since the beginning of seeing the woman,

I’ve been doubtful.

These tattoo people are always fishy.

Hey, what? -Buzz off!

Not talking about you.

Talking about women with tattoos.

Shut up, hypocrite! -Shut up!

We can just do something.

We can just check on the pretence of touching her feet for her blessing.

Which leg…where exactly…do you have any detailed information about that?

We can figure it out.

How come?

Come.

Happening. Intoxication happening.

Happening. I’m intoxicated by your body. Intoxication happening.

Brother-in-law, don’t look at me that way.

When saree slid from my waist.

Brother-in-law, don’t hold me this way.

My chest gets electric shocks.

Oh, king, don’t play with water like this

What if my body flowers with youth?

Brother-in- law, don’t play with raw youth.

What if this wet body catches fire?

Seeing you, I’ve lost you.

Nights are useless.Give me kisses, damsel. Start this now.

Sister-in-law, give the car a push.

Sister-in-law, give the car a push.

Sister-in-law, give the car a push.

Sister-in-law, give the car a push.

Happening. Intoxication happening.

Happening. I’m intoxicated by your body.

Don’t tease me.

Don’t force me.

Don’t increase my heartbeat.

Don’t make me thirsty.

Seeing you, I’ve lost my sleep.

Nights are useless.

Give me kisses, damsel.

Start this now.

Sister-in-law, give the car a push.

Sister-in-law, give the car a push.

Sister-in-law, give the car a push.

Sister-in-law, give the car a push.

Intoxication happening.

Intoxication happening.

What are you guys watching?

Just…nothing.

Oh.

How was your meeting with the producer?

Good.

Was celebrating that only.

Oh!

Good news then.

Why didn’t you call and tell me?

We were just about to come to you.

Tattoo came in the middle.

No, no,

Choco was saying he will get tattooed.

-When did I say? -so we were telling him not to. It hurts your body a lot.

Yeah, it does hurt a lot.

Right.

How do you know it hurts a lot?

Got it done before, have you?

Have you done it Sister-in-law?

Mad or what?

My sister from Paris?

She had taken me to a tattoo parlour.

There’s a City center in Salt Lake? There.

My god,

I got so scared.

There was this guy who approached me with a needle.

Ran and saved myself.

God, what trouble!

I can’t take all that style by hurting your body.

Well done.

It’s not good to hurt your body.

Hmm.

And you’ve such a beautiful body. Just like a heroine.

Who heroine?

Hey,

Oh!

Hey, CD!

Who is the heroine of your film?

Hey!

That is the question, sister-in-law.

Why?

Film industry has so many famous heroines.

Why aren’t you taking Swastika?

Oh, Swastika-wastika are nothing to you.

Naughty.

Please tell me, CD, who is the heroine in your film?

Haven’t finalised yet, sister-in-law.

Okay.

The wound in your head is okay?

Fine.

Pain gone?

See?

I told you sister-in-law is very affectionate.

When I saw you, on first glance you reminded me of my younger aunt.

What?

I’ll slap you.

I’m telling the truth.

I went to do upstairs but brother Jibon did not let…took you upstairs.

Touching your feet, he means.

We mean… he was in such a hurry.

Let us touch your feet once.

What? What’s this? No, no. Leave.

What? What’s this?

What are you guys doing? I don’t like this.

I see you as my friends.

I’m very hurt

because you talked to me this way.

How could you call me aunt?

Idiot,

disloyal,

antinational ass,

told you not to, didn’t I?

Can’t I have friends?

Will open up and talk my heart out…

can’t I have people like that?

What are you saying, sister-in-law?

If you see us as friends, we don’t want anything else from life.

Dont get angry.

Really.

Really?

Yes.

CD has become DVD.

Tell me what news you have.

I don’t think I’ll be able to do this.

This is not my cup of tea.

Speak in my English.

I don’t like your English.

I won’t be able to do this, dude.

In my English, Mission Impossible.

What?

Yes, I don’t fit into this.

I have a different kind of thinking.

You know,

I deserve a little more.

No,

your tall director,

brought the Oscar from America by making Haunted Sister-in-law.

What?

What else?

Where she looked through binoculars and had an affair with her brother-in-law!

You mean Charulata?

What else?

Goddamn you, producer.

You don’t deserve to make one Bengali film in here.

Goodbye.

Millie Paul.

Don't force.

Happening...

Intoxication happening without you.

Intoxication happening.

Assholes.

Hello?

Who?

Is Chitrabhanu there?

Yeah, yeah.

Please give him the phone.

one second.

Hey, CD.

A woman is calling you on the phone.

Tell her to wait.

Hello?

Can I talk to Chitrabhanu Dutta?

Whose phone?

Um. Speaking.

I’m Millie Paul.

Heroine of Haunted Sister-in-law.

Can we meet once?

Who?

Millie Paul.

Don't force.

Happening...

Intoxication happening without you.