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1
00:00:39,789 --> 00:00:43,001
I'm gonna rip out your spleen
and feed it to your husband!
2
00:00:43,001 --> 00:00:44,586
{\an8}Wouldn't want that.
3
00:00:44,586 --> 00:00:48,089
{\an8}Morty, we'd better run before
it figures out what a husband is.
4
00:00:48,089 --> 00:00:50,842
{\an8}This carnival of nightmares
used to be scary, right?
5
00:00:50,842 --> 00:00:53,178
- We've seen too much.
- It sucks, you know?
6
00:00:53,178 --> 00:00:55,555
{\an8}Cause it's fun
to break off a scare now and then.
7
00:00:55,555 --> 00:00:59,267
{\an8}Did I hear you fellas wishing
for some good old fashioned scares?
8
00:00:59,267 --> 00:01:01,144
{\an8}I mean, I more wish
you wouldn't eavesdrop.
9
00:01:01,144 --> 00:01:03,938
{\an8}Who are you?
Does the suit mean you work here,
10
00:01:03,938 --> 00:01:05,565
{\an8}or that you super don't work here?
11
00:01:05,565 --> 00:01:08,318
{\an8}Like yourselves,
I'm a connoisseur of fear.
12
00:01:08,318 --> 00:01:11,112
{\an8}I'm also originally from Earth.
And did you know Earth
13
00:01:11,112 --> 00:01:13,990
{\an8}is the home of the single
scariest place in the galaxy?
14
00:01:14,491 --> 00:01:15,575
{\an8}I can show you if you like.
15
00:01:16,117 --> 00:01:17,410
{\an8}We were headed that way anyway.
16
00:01:18,953 --> 00:01:21,414
{\an8}- Take a left. Almost there.
- We know where Earth is.
17
00:01:21,414 --> 00:01:23,583
{\an8}For guys like you, you know,
who've seen it all
18
00:01:23,917 --> 00:01:26,795
{\an8}there's only a few real fears
left to conquer.
19
00:01:26,795 --> 00:01:30,215
{\an8}And one of them is right down here.
20
00:01:33,718 --> 00:01:36,137
{\an8}- Okay, what the hell.
- This is punching down.
21
00:01:36,137 --> 00:01:38,515
{\an8}Denny's is a nice chain
that gives people starchy food
22
00:01:38,515 --> 00:01:40,016
{\an8}- when they're up late.
- It's a hack joke, buddy.
23
00:01:40,016 --> 00:01:41,643
{\an8}No, this is the place.
24
00:01:42,477 --> 00:01:44,062
{\an8}Good luck to both of you.
I'm gonna get myself a slam.
25
00:01:45,146 --> 00:01:48,233
- He just wanted a ride, right?
- He certainly took us for one.
26
00:01:49,234 --> 00:01:50,944
{\an8}As long as we're here...
27
00:01:51,778 --> 00:01:53,738
{\an8}Ok! Lumberjack Slam,
Grand Slamwhich,
28
00:01:53,738 --> 00:01:56,032
{\an8}Pancake Puppies, Slamburger,
two milkshakes...
29
00:01:56,032 --> 00:01:57,575
{\an8}and an order of Cheddar Tots.
30
00:01:57,575 --> 00:01:59,744
{\an8}Let me know when you want your check,
and if you're here for The Hole,
31
00:01:59,744 --> 00:02:01,621
{\an8}- it's in the men's bathroom.
- The what now?
32
00:02:01,621 --> 00:02:03,998
{\an8}- Hole?
- The Fear Hole. Men's bathroom.
33
00:02:15,134 --> 00:02:17,595
{\an8}Well, it's definitely a hole,
they weren't lying about that.
34
00:02:17,595 --> 00:02:19,639
{\an8}Is that hair? Seaweed?
35
00:02:20,056 --> 00:02:22,559
{\an8}Boy, it's really circling
the whole rim.
36
00:02:22,559 --> 00:02:24,936
{\an8}Guess you gotta jump in
without touching the sides?
37
00:02:24,936 --> 00:02:26,896
{\an8}You think there's spikes on the bottom?
38
00:02:26,896 --> 00:02:28,982
{\an8}I don't think they want you
to go in there and just die.
39
00:02:28,982 --> 00:02:30,233
{\an8}What kind of business would that be?
40
00:02:30,233 --> 00:02:33,403
{\an8}Well, they're not drowning in money.
They still have a built-in TV/VCR.
41
00:02:34,487 --> 00:02:37,073
- It's that carnival guy.
- So he gets a kickback.
42
00:02:37,073 --> 00:02:40,410
{\an8}Hi. Welcome to The Hole.
Here's how it works: You jump in.
43
00:02:40,410 --> 00:02:43,997
{\an8}The Hole manifests your greatest fear.
You conquer that fear, and come out,
44
00:02:43,997 --> 00:02:47,041
{\an8}well, fearless.
And you get your picture on the wall!
45
00:02:47,500 --> 00:02:48,418
{\an8}What does The Hole get out of it?
46
00:02:48,751 --> 00:02:51,838
{\an8}Well, you know those fish
that nibble dead skin off your feet?
47
00:02:51,838 --> 00:02:55,758
{\an8}The Hole's kinda like that.
It eats fear. You win. It wins.
48
00:02:55,758 --> 00:02:57,385
{\an8}Have fun, and enjoy the Ho...
49
00:02:58,720 --> 00:03:01,681
{\an8}Hey Gaddafi, cool your jets
with a taste of Mountain Dew!
50
00:03:02,140 --> 00:03:05,476
{\an8}This has been here since VHS tapes
and there's only three photos?
51
00:03:05,476 --> 00:03:08,396
{\an8}- My tots are getting cold.
- So you don't want to do it?
52
00:03:08,396 --> 00:03:09,814
{\an8}- Do you?
- I mean...
53
00:03:09,814 --> 00:03:12,066
It says it takes away
your greatest fear.
54
00:03:12,066 --> 00:03:14,402
My greatest fear, Morty,
is trusting a gross hole
55
00:03:14,402 --> 00:03:17,655
to conquer my fear, and I
conquer that fear by walking away.
56
00:03:17,655 --> 00:03:18,948
Okay, fine.
57
00:03:21,409 --> 00:03:22,327
You little turd!
58
00:03:25,288 --> 00:03:28,583
- Oh God!
- Oh God!
59
00:03:30,627 --> 00:03:33,713
Hold still
while i stuff you with maggots!
60
00:03:33,713 --> 00:03:36,174
Rick!
61
00:03:37,133 --> 00:03:39,719
Okay! The Hole thinks
I'm scared of not having a gun?
62
00:03:42,805 --> 00:03:43,932
Fear conquered!
63
00:03:45,433 --> 00:03:49,687
Check out dem gains! Morty!
Where are you, Morty? Let's go!
64
00:03:50,188 --> 00:03:52,815
- Oh jeez! Oh god, oh jeez!
- Man! We both shit our pants!
65
00:03:52,815 --> 00:03:54,817
- Christ, Rick! My button.
- What a fucking ride!
66
00:03:54,817 --> 00:03:58,404
- Maggots in my button!
- Fuck yeah, on the wall, motherfuckers!
67
00:03:58,404 --> 00:04:00,281
It's not worth it! Not worth it!
68
00:04:03,701 --> 00:04:05,954
Oh my god, you both reek.
What is that?
69
00:04:05,954 --> 00:04:07,205
Morty and I shit our pants.
70
00:04:07,205 --> 00:04:09,540
You're looking at the two
newest members of the Hole Club.
71
00:04:09,540 --> 00:04:11,250
Okay, sluts.
72
00:04:12,585 --> 00:04:13,503
What the hell?
73
00:04:14,003 --> 00:04:19,384
Bomb almost killed her.
Take care of our wife.
74
00:04:20,927 --> 00:04:24,180
Rick? No!
Oh my God! No, no!
75
00:04:24,722 --> 00:04:27,600
- Mom?
- Where am I? Who are you people?
76
00:04:27,600 --> 00:04:30,019
You're my mom, but, you're young?
77
00:04:30,019 --> 00:04:33,481
- Rick, what's happening??
- Wait. Rick?
78
00:04:34,524 --> 00:04:36,275
What the fuck, Grandpa?
Say something!
79
00:04:36,859 --> 00:04:39,237
- Okay, we're clearly still in the hole.
- That's exactly what I was thinking.
80
00:04:39,237 --> 00:04:40,321
We never left the hole and...
81
00:04:40,321 --> 00:04:42,198
And part of the hole is thinking
you left the hole and then
82
00:04:42,198 --> 00:04:43,491
And then it can really dig into you.
83
00:04:43,491 --> 00:04:46,369
Because you can't really be scared
of anything if you know you're
84
00:04:46,369 --> 00:04:47,996
- Still in the hole!
- Still in the hole!
85
00:04:47,996 --> 00:04:49,455
What the fuck are you two talking about?
86
00:04:49,455 --> 00:04:51,582
Why is dead Grandma alive
in our living room?
87
00:04:51,582 --> 00:04:53,251
Rick, why are you old?
88
00:04:53,251 --> 00:04:54,293
All great questions.
89
00:04:54,293 --> 00:04:56,421
You guys get reacquainted
while we grab some equipment.
90
00:04:57,338 --> 00:04:59,882
Wait, are we sure this isn't, like,
a double mislead?
91
00:04:59,882 --> 00:05:02,135
A double mislead like
we went into a generic fear hole
92
00:05:02,135 --> 00:05:04,762
and then coincidentally
came home to that? That's...
93
00:05:05,221 --> 00:05:07,807
That's my wife.
From the day I lost her.
94
00:05:07,807 --> 00:05:09,517
Well, what's it got to do with me?
95
00:05:11,269 --> 00:05:12,061
- Rick?
- Right!
96
00:05:12,061 --> 00:05:14,272
I think I figured it out, Morty.
Your greatest fear,
97
00:05:14,272 --> 00:05:16,399
is me getting Diane back
and being happy again.
98
00:05:16,399 --> 00:05:17,483
What? Why?
99
00:05:17,483 --> 00:05:19,318
Because then I won't need you.
Look how scared you're
100
00:05:19,318 --> 00:05:22,196
- getting just talking about it.
- I'm not scared, I'm insulted.
101
00:05:22,196 --> 00:05:24,323
What kind of
backhanded-ass theory is that?
102
00:05:24,323 --> 00:05:26,200
My greatest fear is you hooking up?
103
00:05:26,200 --> 00:05:28,745
You're right, we can't know for sure
until I get more data.
104
00:05:29,162 --> 00:05:31,873
Alright family!
Who wants to catch up over ice cream?
105
00:05:32,623 --> 00:05:35,334
I knew he was working
on teleportation. But...
106
00:05:35,334 --> 00:05:37,170
Wouldn't this be time travel?
107
00:05:37,170 --> 00:05:39,422
Dad never touches time travel.
108
00:05:39,422 --> 00:05:40,506
He calls it the Long...
109
00:05:40,506 --> 00:05:42,592
Long Island Iced
Tea of science fiction.
110
00:05:42,592 --> 00:05:44,927
Yes, but then what is this?
111
00:05:44,927 --> 00:05:46,846
Don't worry about it,
it's not real. Okay!
112
00:05:46,846 --> 00:05:48,639
I figure it's better to do this
in front of you,
113
00:05:48,639 --> 00:05:51,934
I didn't want to walk in de-aged.
What do you think, D? 45? Younger?
114
00:05:51,934 --> 00:05:55,063
I don't care about your age, Rick.
I don't even want to call you that,
115
00:05:55,063 --> 00:05:58,107
that's my husband's name,
he just died.
116
00:05:58,107 --> 00:05:59,108
I know.
117
00:05:59,442 --> 00:06:00,568
So, 27?
118
00:06:00,568 --> 00:06:03,780
- Dad! You're traumatizing her.
- What? It's my face, too.
119
00:06:03,780 --> 00:06:07,158
And now Diane gets to understand
that I'm still sexy and a genius.
120
00:06:07,158 --> 00:06:08,326
What a kindness.
121
00:06:08,326 --> 00:06:11,079
You were right, Rick,
I'm really terrified right now.
122
00:06:11,079 --> 00:06:13,331
Terrified of what?
If you don't mind,
123
00:06:13,331 --> 00:06:16,125
I'd like to get to know
the adult version of my...
124
00:06:16,501 --> 00:06:17,585
Oh my God!
125
00:06:17,585 --> 00:06:19,504
Where's my real daughter?
126
00:06:19,504 --> 00:06:20,505
Sweetie, it's all right.
127
00:06:20,880 --> 00:06:23,883
This may as well be our real daughter,
because she's just as real as you.
128
00:06:23,883 --> 00:06:25,009
- What?
- Put it this way.
129
00:06:25,009 --> 00:06:26,677
You're all basically NPCs.
130
00:06:26,677 --> 00:06:29,138
Only Morty and I are real,
so your side quests don't matter.
131
00:06:29,555 --> 00:06:32,141
- The main quest is... us.
- You're disgusting.
132
00:06:32,141 --> 00:06:35,103
You're talking about our baby girl
like she's theoretical?
133
00:06:35,103 --> 00:06:37,563
- Welcome to the family.
- No, you don't get it, honey.
134
00:06:37,563 --> 00:06:39,565
Even if this was real,
she'd be only a version
135
00:06:39,565 --> 00:06:41,567
of your daughter who could also
be a clone of your daughter.
136
00:06:41,567 --> 00:06:44,862
Stop wearing my husband's face!
You're nothing like him!
137
00:06:44,862 --> 00:06:48,157
- Because I lost you!
- Maybe you didn't deserve me!
138
00:06:53,746 --> 00:06:54,956
You want to hear a new theory?
139
00:06:55,456 --> 00:06:59,919
Maybe your greatest fear is getting
a second chance with her and blowing it.
140
00:06:59,919 --> 00:07:02,046
You don't think that fear
is been pretty well faced?
141
00:07:02,046 --> 00:07:06,217
Then you haven't conquered it.
Or accepted it. Or something.
142
00:07:06,217 --> 00:07:07,927
"Or something?"
I'm not a fearologist!
143
00:07:07,927 --> 00:07:09,720
Morty, all rom-coms have an arc.
144
00:07:09,720 --> 00:07:12,265
Even You've Got Mail begins
with Tom Hanks killing that cop.
145
00:07:12,265 --> 00:07:13,266
- Really?
- I don't know!
146
00:07:13,266 --> 00:07:14,892
I'm not going to fucking
watch You've Got Mail.
147
00:07:14,892 --> 00:07:17,562
I'm doing this for you, Morty.
The sooner I get her back,
148
00:07:17,562 --> 00:07:20,731
the sooner you can conquer your fear
of being a useless, lonely turd.
149
00:07:21,274 --> 00:07:23,025
You don't think that's been faced?
150
00:07:28,281 --> 00:07:30,491
Hello Diane,
here's the song I rehearsed.
151
00:07:30,825 --> 00:07:33,077
You had a bad day
and Rick made it worse.
152
00:07:33,494 --> 00:07:38,332
He felt bad, so he created me.
I deliver you waffles and an apology.
153
00:07:38,791 --> 00:07:41,085
Why do I have memories
of being a human child?
154
00:07:41,085 --> 00:07:42,378
- Why would I need...
- Shit!
155
00:07:42,879 --> 00:07:43,588
Goddammit!
156
00:07:43,588 --> 00:07:46,424
There was a whole second verse about
inviting you to the zoo with the family.
157
00:07:46,424 --> 00:07:49,135
I've seen that robot's arms.
158
00:07:49,135 --> 00:07:52,305
I used them on a law enforcement drone
that the Feds had me build.
159
00:07:52,305 --> 00:07:53,306
It's how we...
160
00:07:54,265 --> 00:07:55,224
How I met my wife.
161
00:07:56,392 --> 00:07:57,810
The zoo sounds nice.
162
00:07:58,769 --> 00:08:00,438
And this one time,
we raised a civilization living
163
00:08:00,438 --> 00:08:03,649
on a zit on my face, and Grandpa
helped me rule over it as queen.
164
00:08:03,649 --> 00:08:05,860
It sounds like you guys
are a real family now.
165
00:08:06,360 --> 00:08:08,154
I wish you could've been
part of it, Mom.
166
00:08:09,697 --> 00:08:11,282
- Oh, honey!
- Rick!
167
00:08:11,282 --> 00:08:13,201
Is there a deadline
on this theory you're chasing?
168
00:08:13,659 --> 00:08:17,496
Yeah, sure!
That's a good idea, Morty. Do that.
169
00:08:19,707 --> 00:08:22,210
I always wished I knew
what they were saying.
170
00:08:22,210 --> 00:08:24,420
Your Master's thesis.
Nonhuman Intelligence.
171
00:08:24,420 --> 00:08:25,963
When did you read that?
172
00:08:26,297 --> 00:08:27,215
After you were gone.
173
00:08:27,715 --> 00:08:28,925
It helped me develop this.
174
00:08:30,801 --> 00:08:32,053
Fuck you! Fuck you, Greg!
175
00:08:32,053 --> 00:08:33,512
- Fuck you, Lisa! Bread.
- No!
176
00:08:33,512 --> 00:08:34,972
- Fuck you!
- Fuck you! There's bread.
177
00:08:34,972 --> 00:08:37,808
- I guess that's what I expected?
- Anticlimactic isn't it.
178
00:08:37,808 --> 00:08:39,852
They kinda suck.
179
00:08:42,897 --> 00:08:44,273
Wanna grab a drink?
180
00:08:46,359 --> 00:08:47,526
Yeah, alright!
181
00:08:58,996 --> 00:09:01,582
When did you stop being a lightweight?
182
00:09:01,582 --> 00:09:03,751
Kept looking for my wife
at the bottom of a bottle.
183
00:09:04,085 --> 00:09:05,086
You're pathetic.
184
00:09:05,670 --> 00:09:07,838
Hey! To being pathetic.
185
00:09:13,219 --> 00:09:14,136
Clear!
186
00:09:24,105 --> 00:09:25,356
My turn, my turn.
187
00:09:30,236 --> 00:09:34,115
I'll tell you what, Old Man.
Seems like losing me made you cooler.
188
00:09:35,032 --> 00:09:36,409
I should die more often.
189
00:09:37,535 --> 00:09:38,452
You did.
190
00:09:39,287 --> 00:09:41,289
You died everywhere forever.
191
00:09:42,290 --> 00:09:43,708
You're the only thing I can't replace.
192
00:09:43,708 --> 00:09:48,045
Okay, okay, Mr. Weepy.
I'm not even real, remember?
193
00:09:48,379 --> 00:09:50,840
Nothing's real, that's your jam, right?
194
00:09:50,840 --> 00:09:53,384
My grandson... our grandson...
195
00:09:53,384 --> 00:09:56,387
thinks this is happening because
my greatest fear is letting you go.
196
00:09:56,387 --> 00:09:58,222
- Then don't.
- I don't want to.
197
00:09:58,222 --> 00:10:00,850
- Then kiss me.
- I'm old and we have puke mouth.
198
00:10:00,850 --> 00:10:03,019
Well, I'm not here
and it's not real puke.
199
00:10:11,736 --> 00:10:13,404
Okay, Rick! Dude...
200
00:10:13,404 --> 00:10:14,864
Fuck you Morty, it's a blazer.
201
00:10:14,864 --> 00:10:16,532
That's not what I meant.
You look sick.
202
00:10:16,907 --> 00:10:19,869
- The hole is feeding on you.
- I thought it's supposed to eat my fear.
203
00:10:19,869 --> 00:10:21,412
Can we get some fucking rules
up in this hole?
204
00:10:21,412 --> 00:10:23,414
I don't know the rules!
Maybe you're just dying
205
00:10:23,414 --> 00:10:24,832
because you've been in here too long!
206
00:10:24,832 --> 00:10:27,710
Interesting theory.
I wonder why you're so rosy-cheeked.
207
00:10:27,710 --> 00:10:28,627
What are you saying?
208
00:10:28,627 --> 00:10:30,921
Maybe the real you
is off somewhere running from spiders.
209
00:10:30,921 --> 00:10:32,256
So now I'm not real?
210
00:10:32,256 --> 00:10:35,259
Maybe my greatest fear is having
to tell you to fuck the fuck off.
211
00:10:35,259 --> 00:10:37,053
- Go ahead and face it!
- Fuck the fuck off!
212
00:10:37,053 --> 00:10:41,015
- Ready to Showbiz Pizza?
- Lemme see that bear play banjo!
213
00:10:41,015 --> 00:10:43,976
Here's one for ya.
I'm afraid of watching you die.
214
00:10:43,976 --> 00:10:46,312
I like that theory, Morty.
So stop watching.
215
00:10:50,399 --> 00:10:53,486
Okay, this is it. You nailed it.
My worst nightmare.
216
00:10:53,944 --> 00:10:55,363
I'd like to leave The Hole now.
217
00:10:56,572 --> 00:10:59,742
Hey, Hole, I'm talking to you.
Are you listening?
218
00:11:09,543 --> 00:11:11,379
So, what are you, like, the Hole?
219
00:11:11,379 --> 00:11:13,547
The Hole's promoter?
The Hole's intern?
220
00:11:13,547 --> 00:11:14,673
Is there a hole here?
221
00:11:14,673 --> 00:11:18,552
Right! I'm supposed to go in there
and be shocked that there's no hole,
222
00:11:18,552 --> 00:11:21,138
or that there is a hole?
What difference would it make?
223
00:11:21,138 --> 00:11:23,265
You are hard to scare.
224
00:11:23,265 --> 00:11:24,642
And Rick isn't, right?
225
00:11:24,642 --> 00:11:26,936
The Hole's gonna, like,
suck on him forever
226
00:11:26,936 --> 00:11:29,688
because his big secret
is that he's got the most fear?
227
00:11:29,688 --> 00:11:32,024
Well, we can certainly say
you're not afraid to be reductive.
228
00:11:32,525 --> 00:11:35,903
I doubt your grandpa has "more" fear
than the average asshole in a Denny's.
229
00:11:35,903 --> 00:11:36,987
- Hey.
- Sorry!
230
00:11:36,987 --> 00:11:40,574
If anything, he seems pretty brave.
He's certainly not afraid to die.
231
00:11:40,574 --> 00:11:42,076
Maybe that makes his fear extra...
232
00:11:42,827 --> 00:11:43,744
delicious.
233
00:11:46,455 --> 00:11:48,332
So, what, he's scared of love?
234
00:11:48,332 --> 00:11:51,210
Everyone's scared of love, dipshit.
You'll learn that in your twenties.
235
00:11:51,544 --> 00:11:54,338
It takes a very rare,
very powerful being to be
236
00:11:54,964 --> 00:11:56,340
terrified of happiness.
237
00:11:56,340 --> 00:11:57,633
- Dumb.
- You're dumb.
238
00:11:57,633 --> 00:11:59,093
That's why you're
not scared to be happy.
239
00:11:59,093 --> 00:12:00,886
The smarter you are, the more you know.
240
00:12:00,886 --> 00:12:03,389
Happiness is a trap.
It can't last forever.
241
00:12:03,806 --> 00:12:05,266
Let's say you meet
the love of your life,
242
00:12:05,266 --> 00:12:07,685
well, it's still gonna end...
It's inevitable!
243
00:12:08,018 --> 00:12:10,062
Whether by the slow pull of a disease,
244
00:12:10,062 --> 00:12:12,273
or the shock of loose footing
on a hiking trail.
245
00:12:12,273 --> 00:12:14,567
whether it be the corrosion
of two personalities
246
00:12:14,567 --> 00:12:16,819
that reshape each other
until they're incompatible,
247
00:12:16,819 --> 00:12:19,280
or maybe the old stranger in a bar
who says the things
248
00:12:19,280 --> 00:12:22,199
that need to be said,
to that person, that night.
249
00:12:22,616 --> 00:12:26,162
The point is... Happiness always ends.
250
00:12:26,162 --> 00:12:28,289
Best case scenario, think about this.
Best case.
251
00:12:28,664 --> 00:12:31,500
Is that you die at the same time.
252
00:12:32,293 --> 00:12:34,545
- Yikes.
- Can't the Hole just let me go then?
253
00:12:34,545 --> 00:12:35,713
Sounds like I don't matter.
254
00:12:35,713 --> 00:12:38,549
You don't. But if you go,
you'll take him away. Don't worry.
255
00:12:38,549 --> 00:12:40,885
Rick will die
before accepting happiness.
256
00:12:40,885 --> 00:12:43,095
After that, we'll chase you
with some clowns
257
00:12:43,095 --> 00:12:44,555
or some dumb shit like that.
258
00:12:44,555 --> 00:12:48,309
But Grandpa... Grandpa's gonna die.
259
00:12:48,809 --> 00:12:50,728
Just like Diane.
260
00:12:57,860 --> 00:13:00,446
Sir, you've been in this booth
for a really long time,
261
00:13:00,446 --> 00:13:02,198
- one coffee isn't gonna cut it.
- That's fair.
262
00:13:02,573 --> 00:13:04,492
- Wanna split some pancake puppies?
- No!
263
00:13:06,577 --> 00:13:08,370
Beth? Summer? Anyone!
264
00:13:08,370 --> 00:13:10,414
Dad, it's not real. Neither are you.
265
00:13:10,414 --> 00:13:12,416
If that's true, then you deal with it!
266
00:13:13,042 --> 00:13:14,710
You know what, you're right.
267
00:13:17,254 --> 00:13:18,380
How about this?
268
00:13:18,380 --> 00:13:21,300
- Morty! What are you doing?
- Being scared!
269
00:13:26,013 --> 00:13:27,848
How is that not enough fear?
270
00:13:27,848 --> 00:13:29,600
You're the one scaring me, Morty!
271
00:13:29,600 --> 00:13:30,893
No, Dad, it's okay!
272
00:13:30,893 --> 00:13:33,270
It's not okay! That wasn't normal!
273
00:13:35,356 --> 00:13:38,526
My greatest fear is not being accepted.
274
00:13:38,526 --> 00:13:39,735
It should be!
275
00:13:39,735 --> 00:13:41,946
And you need to fear
it a hell of a lot more!
276
00:13:43,197 --> 00:13:44,281
I can do that.
277
00:13:44,281 --> 00:13:45,407
You like that?
278
00:13:45,824 --> 00:13:46,867
Do you want to die?
279
00:13:46,867 --> 00:13:49,995
I have enough unaddressed trauma
to flood this hallway.
280
00:13:51,789 --> 00:13:54,375
You fucking idiot,
this list says Top Five Things
281
00:13:54,375 --> 00:13:55,668
and you only wrote down four.
282
00:14:02,174 --> 00:14:03,092
Trust fall!
283
00:14:04,176 --> 00:14:06,470
None of us touch or speak
to this kid ever.
284
00:14:07,346 --> 00:14:10,224
Maybe take a picture,
send it to your friends?
285
00:14:10,224 --> 00:14:11,225
Not a bad idea.
286
00:14:12,142 --> 00:14:14,812
How can we do the school play
if Johnny has laryngitis?
287
00:14:14,812 --> 00:14:17,356
- There's no understudy!
- Put me in the play.
288
00:14:17,356 --> 00:14:19,358
- You don't know the lines.
- Yes I do.
289
00:14:19,733 --> 00:14:22,444
Three Days of Rain?
I have it memorized.
290
00:14:22,444 --> 00:14:24,405
And I refuse to prove
that until you cast me.
291
00:14:24,405 --> 00:14:27,074
Have it your way,
but The New York Times is coming,
292
00:14:27,074 --> 00:14:30,327
and they're doing a feature on the
current state of young American theater.
293
00:14:32,454 --> 00:14:33,497
Perfect.
294
00:14:33,497 --> 00:14:36,792
- It ended in a church? What?
- Yeah!
295
00:14:36,792 --> 00:14:39,420
They'd already died
it was purgatory or something.
296
00:14:39,753 --> 00:14:41,255
How did your universe's version end?
297
00:14:41,255 --> 00:14:44,758
Jack, Locke and Sawyer teamed up to kill
a fog monster and everyone got rescued.
298
00:14:44,758 --> 00:14:47,219
It was one season long
and it was perfect television.
299
00:14:47,219 --> 00:14:49,888
You can be great
or you can be around forever, right?
300
00:14:49,888 --> 00:14:53,142
True.
301
00:14:53,809 --> 00:14:55,477
- True.
- Where's this going?
302
00:14:55,477 --> 00:14:57,104
- True.
- We doing robot roleplay?
303
00:14:57,104 --> 00:14:58,397
- True.
- I've got oil at home.
304
00:14:58,897 --> 00:15:00,524
- True.
- What was that? Diane!
305
00:15:00,524 --> 00:15:01,483
Diane?
306
00:15:01,483 --> 00:15:04,236
- Diane.
- Stay with me! Diane?
307
00:15:04,236 --> 00:15:05,779
Rick? What's happening?
308
00:15:05,779 --> 00:15:08,574
Fucking Morty!
He's trying to hog the hole. C'mon!
309
00:15:15,873 --> 00:15:19,335
Alas, our father is dead.
310
00:15:20,169 --> 00:15:22,004
Walker, are you here?
311
00:15:24,465 --> 00:15:32,056
I'm Walker.
Sure has been raining a lot of days.
312
00:15:33,766 --> 00:15:34,683
What the fuck is he doing?
313
00:15:35,517 --> 00:15:36,644
What's wrong with him?
314
00:15:37,019 --> 00:15:39,897
He's naked.
And why does he look sick?
315
00:15:41,357 --> 00:15:42,358
Because he's dying.
316
00:15:43,776 --> 00:15:45,944
Fuck.
I gotta get him out of here.
317
00:15:46,278 --> 00:15:48,072
But if I do,
I might have to go with him.
318
00:15:49,198 --> 00:15:51,617
I don't want to.
I don't want to, Diane.
319
00:15:51,617 --> 00:15:53,577
I think my greatest fear
is letting you go.
320
00:15:53,577 --> 00:15:56,205
That's a good fear, Rick.
Keep that fear.
321
00:15:56,538 --> 00:15:59,083
If you don't, you'll kill me. Again.
322
00:15:59,583 --> 00:16:02,086
I know.
But I don't have to kill Morty too.
323
00:16:02,086 --> 00:16:05,547
How do you know he's even real?
Look at his weird little balls.
324
00:16:07,174 --> 00:16:08,092
Goodbye, Diane.
325
00:16:11,929 --> 00:16:13,263
- Rick...?
- Shut up Morty.
326
00:16:13,263 --> 00:16:15,974
DJ, drop that beat,
we gotta conquer a fear!
327
00:16:18,602 --> 00:16:20,938
This is my grandson
don't look at his pee-pee
328
00:16:20,938 --> 00:16:23,565
stead of staring at Morty
put your eyes on me
329
00:16:23,565 --> 00:16:26,235
I'm a roped-out freak
loose dog in my ass
330
00:16:26,235 --> 00:16:29,071
macaroni in my pocket
Rickity masterclass.
331
00:16:29,071 --> 00:16:31,657
I don't know how to rap
I don't know how to rhyme
332
00:16:31,657 --> 00:16:34,284
i don't know how to rap
now eat my shit!
333
00:16:35,536 --> 00:16:36,745
Incredible.
334
00:16:36,745 --> 00:16:39,581
Now throw your hands up!
And put your hands down.
335
00:16:39,581 --> 00:16:42,000
Throw your hands up!
Now put them back down!
336
00:16:43,001 --> 00:16:45,254
Three days of rain!
337
00:16:48,006 --> 00:16:50,134
That was an astounding feat
of personal bravery.
338
00:16:50,634 --> 00:16:53,220
Nudity always makes theater
serious and good.
339
00:16:53,887 --> 00:16:54,930
How do you feel?
340
00:16:54,930 --> 00:16:56,515
Accepted. You?
341
00:16:56,515 --> 00:16:57,516
Pathetic.
342
00:16:57,891 --> 00:16:59,393
But...
Happy?
343
00:17:13,490 --> 00:17:16,160
We did it!
We conquered our fears. Right?
344
00:17:19,496 --> 00:17:23,292
Rick! You just looked real sad,
which I'm afraid of.
345
00:17:24,042 --> 00:17:27,504
You know, of being responsible
for your sadness.
346
00:17:27,963 --> 00:17:30,716
Which means, I think,
we might still be in The Hole.
347
00:17:31,592 --> 00:17:34,887
Well, I am definitely afraid of you
ever knowing anything before me.
348
00:17:34,887 --> 00:17:37,514
So, I'd say there's a 100% chance
that we're still...
349
00:17:39,600 --> 00:17:41,810
God damn it.
Is this going to be a whole thing?
350
00:17:41,810 --> 00:17:42,895
No wordplay, Morty.
351
00:17:42,895 --> 00:17:45,355
We have to figure out our actual fears
if we're ever going to get out of here.
352
00:17:45,355 --> 00:17:46,899
- Actual fears?
- Yeah!
353
00:17:46,899 --> 00:17:48,567
Tell me your fucking fear
so we can conquer it.
354
00:17:48,567 --> 00:17:52,279
I just had to crucify myself in order
to save you from your Hole Wife,
355
00:17:52,279 --> 00:17:54,865
and you think I'm the one
with unresolved fears?
356
00:17:54,865 --> 00:17:56,658
I oughta be afraid
that we'll never get out,
357
00:17:56,658 --> 00:17:58,368
because you'll never admit
that you're afraid!
358
00:18:01,872 --> 00:18:03,957
Okay. Good job.
You conquered it, right?
359
00:18:04,374 --> 00:18:06,668
I think so?
How are we supposed to know?
360
00:18:06,668 --> 00:18:08,587
No, this is real, I can tell.
361
00:18:08,587 --> 00:18:10,839
You're not afraid that you
could be certain about something
362
00:18:10,839 --> 00:18:12,382
and still turn out to be wrong?
363
00:18:14,009 --> 00:18:16,428
- You cowardly asshole!
- How was I supposed to know?
364
00:18:19,431 --> 00:18:21,266
Eight dollars for a side of bacon?
365
00:18:21,266 --> 00:18:23,060
Are you fucking kidding me?
366
00:18:23,060 --> 00:18:24,978
It's a symptom
of a larger concern, Morty.
367
00:18:24,978 --> 00:18:27,231
- If capitalism collapses...
- Are we done here?
368
00:18:27,564 --> 00:18:30,317
I don't know. Aren't you a little
afraid at this point of The Hole itself?
369
00:18:30,317 --> 00:18:31,318
What?
370
00:18:32,152 --> 00:18:33,695
I swear to God!
If we're still climbing out
371
00:18:33,695 --> 00:18:35,531
of this fucking Hole
two seasons from now.
372
00:18:35,531 --> 00:18:37,115
- Maybe that was it.
- What?
373
00:18:37,115 --> 00:18:40,285
Maybe we needed to let go
of our fear of uncertainty. You know?
374
00:18:40,869 --> 00:18:41,954
Right.
375
00:18:41,954 --> 00:18:44,081
I'd say we're pretty native
to that at this point.
376
00:18:44,081 --> 00:18:46,041
- Okay thank you, Hole!
- Thank you, Hole!
377
00:18:46,041 --> 00:18:49,419
We no longer need to know
if we're in you! So Bye!
378
00:18:57,511 --> 00:18:58,929
Are you afraid we're still in it?
379
00:18:58,929 --> 00:19:01,473
I mean, I hope we're not,
but if we are...
380
00:19:01,473 --> 00:19:03,851
- We'll find out eventually.
- Which no longer scares me.
381
00:19:03,851 --> 00:19:06,061
Same.
Okay. I'm gonna go get drunk.
382
00:19:09,314 --> 00:19:13,902
Move on they say,
you'll feel better with time.
383
00:19:15,112 --> 00:19:18,824
But time alone can't heal
This heart of mine.
384
00:19:22,119 --> 00:19:26,582
You can't go back,
That's the only rule,
385
00:19:27,916 --> 00:19:31,670
But rules were meant to break
when it comes to you.
386
00:19:33,589 --> 00:19:39,469
I saw time and time,
Slip by when I withdrew,
387
00:19:39,845 --> 00:19:44,808
I wandered far and wide,
Without you.
388
00:19:46,476 --> 00:19:47,853
Without you.
389
00:19:59,781 --> 00:20:05,078
So I bury my dead,
And I try to start again,
390
00:20:06,038 --> 00:20:10,125
But it will never be the same
As it was back then.
391
00:20:11,919 --> 00:20:17,841
I've seen time and time,
Slip by, but I'll make do,
392
00:20:18,383 --> 00:20:21,678
-‘Cause I won't live my life...
- Oh my God, I've turned into my dad!
393
00:20:24,056 --> 00:20:26,808
Maybe there's no way out.
Maybe we were born here.
394
00:20:27,643 --> 00:20:30,646
- C'mon. We're gonna get through this.
- I'm staying here.
395
00:20:30,646 --> 00:20:33,190
No. We're Rick and Morty.
I'm not leaving without you.
396
00:20:33,982 --> 00:20:35,108
What did you say?
397
00:20:35,108 --> 00:20:37,945
I said I'm not leaving you in here.
Come on. You're irreplaceable.
398
00:20:40,656 --> 00:20:42,240
- What?
- Oh my god.
399
00:20:42,240 --> 00:20:43,742
I know what I'm afraid of.
400
00:20:44,076 --> 00:20:46,370
I'm afraid you'd never say
that in real life.
401
00:20:46,370 --> 00:20:48,372
I'm afraid that if I jumped into a hole,
402
00:20:48,372 --> 00:20:50,457
you wouldn't even bother
jumping in after me.
403
00:20:50,457 --> 00:20:54,294
You'd just stand there and watch.
This entire thing has been about me.
404
00:20:54,836 --> 00:20:57,756
You're not even in the hole, are you?
405
00:20:59,091 --> 00:21:01,009
Thank you for visiting
the Fear Hole, Morty.
406
00:21:01,009 --> 00:21:04,471
Your fear of relying on Ric
has been delicious.
407
00:21:04,471 --> 00:21:06,974
Dear God!
408
00:21:09,017 --> 00:21:11,561
Morty! How was it?
Was it spiders?
409
00:21:11,937 --> 00:21:15,315
Oh jeez. Oh my god, no. You...
410
00:21:16,024 --> 00:21:18,777
- You didn't go in at all?
- No, it's a one-person ride.
411
00:21:18,777 --> 00:21:20,904
You can't face two fears
at the same time.
412
00:21:20,904 --> 00:21:22,948
If my fear was fire
and yours was water...
413
00:21:22,948 --> 00:21:24,366
I get it. It's fine.
414
00:21:27,202 --> 00:21:28,161
It really is fine.
415
00:21:28,662 --> 00:21:30,789
You do seem a little less burdened.
416
00:21:30,789 --> 00:21:33,625
Rick, am I irreplaceable?
417
00:21:33,625 --> 00:21:37,170
- I mean, define "irreplaceable".
- That's good. Good.
418
00:21:38,922 --> 00:21:39,840
I'm back.
419
00:21:40,882 --> 00:21:43,010
Don't!
Or I won't know if I'm out!
420
00:21:43,010 --> 00:21:44,886
- Is it that good? Should I go in?
- No.
421
00:21:45,429 --> 00:21:46,346
You holding out on me?
422
00:21:47,014 --> 00:21:48,849
You don't want to deal with it, Rick.
423
00:21:48,849 --> 00:21:52,227
There was messed-up mental shit
in there. Like, Diane was in there.
424
00:21:52,227 --> 00:21:53,520
- What?
- Not in a good way.
425
00:21:53,937 --> 00:21:54,896
Just trust me.
426
00:21:55,439 --> 00:21:57,691
Okay, buddy.
Let's go slam some pancakes.
427
00:22:47,240 --> 00:22:51,036
How bout that? Season 7!
428
00:22:51,036 --> 00:22:53,246
It was touch and go
there for a second.
429
00:22:53,246 --> 00:22:58,126
Remember when I stole my kid?
I stole one of these too!
430
00:23:01,797 --> 00:23:06,635
It's all about having a goal
and stopping at nothing to achieve it!
431
00:23:06,635 --> 00:23:09,554
Then you'll be fulfilled!
35378
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