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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:01:12,489 --> 00:01:13,866 Your turn. 2 00:01:16,743 --> 00:01:17,744 On, fuck. 3 00:01:29,881 --> 00:01:31,633 Okay, I'm awake. 4 00:01:40,142 --> 00:01:41,564 Good morning. 5 00:01:43,729 --> 00:01:46,448 You guys are up a little early today, huh? 6 00:01:47,441 --> 00:01:50,286 Did we have some nightmares or something? Huh? 7 00:01:52,029 --> 00:01:53,906 Let's see what you made for daddy. 8 00:01:54,072 --> 00:01:55,073 Let's see. 9 00:01:57,200 --> 00:02:00,875 I wouldn't like to sleep with that in my pants, either. 10 00:02:01,079 --> 00:02:03,298 But it did happen once in college. 11 00:02:05,375 --> 00:02:07,048 Can you leave that bottle alone, honey? 12 00:02:07,210 --> 00:02:08,587 Can you put it down? 13 00:02:09,713 --> 00:02:11,646 Honey... Sarah... Sarah... 14 00:02:11,965 --> 00:02:13,967 No, no! Sweetheart! 15 00:02:14,134 --> 00:02:15,260 Damn. 16 00:02:16,595 --> 00:02:20,566 I know. I'll have you back in your warm little bed in one second. 17 00:02:20,724 --> 00:02:22,601 Here you go. Back to bed, sweetheart. 18 00:02:22,768 --> 00:02:24,611 You got a fresh, dry diapy. 19 00:02:24,770 --> 00:02:26,568 Peter... 20 00:02:26,730 --> 00:02:28,232 Peter, please! 21 00:02:28,732 --> 00:02:31,736 Buddy, we talked about the head thing. 22 00:02:33,987 --> 00:02:36,410 Let me get you all hooked up. 23 00:02:39,576 --> 00:02:42,079 Hang on, don't fall. 24 00:02:50,337 --> 00:02:51,338 Oh, no! 25 00:02:53,924 --> 00:02:55,426 Peter... Oh. 26 00:03:09,940 --> 00:03:13,285 Okay. A little something for daddy. 27 00:03:24,135 --> 00:03:31,356 Subtitles by demonseye 28 00:03:33,630 --> 00:03:36,634 Steel, Kuhbach, McCloud Law Firm. Good morning. 29 00:03:39,845 --> 00:03:41,097 Good morning, Lockwood. 30 00:03:41,263 --> 00:03:42,936 Good morning, Mr. Steel. 31 00:03:43,098 --> 00:03:44,475 Thank you. 32 00:03:44,808 --> 00:03:45,980 How are the kids? 33 00:03:46,184 --> 00:03:47,811 Oh, they're terrific. Just terrific. 34 00:03:47,978 --> 00:03:49,195 Children are such a joy. 35 00:03:49,354 --> 00:03:50,776 Yes, absolutely. Always. 36 00:03:50,856 --> 00:03:52,483 Any word on the Amalgamated merger? 37 00:03:52,649 --> 00:03:53,821 That's all but signed. 38 00:03:53,984 --> 00:03:57,033 And just in time for your partner review, no less. 39 00:03:57,612 --> 00:03:59,706 Really? Oh, I hadn't noticed. 40 00:03:59,865 --> 00:04:01,788 I look forward to having your antic sense of humor 41 00:04:01,908 --> 00:04:03,831 in the partner suite, Lockwood. 42 00:04:03,994 --> 00:04:06,167 It can get a touch dry up there. 43 00:04:06,538 --> 00:04:08,165 Thank you so much. Hmm. 44 00:04:08,457 --> 00:04:09,629 But a Double Windsor? 45 00:04:10,000 --> 00:04:12,674 Come on, son. This is not the dog track. 46 00:04:12,753 --> 00:04:13,845 No. Yes. 47 00:04:13,920 --> 00:04:14,921 Yeah. 48 00:04:15,005 --> 00:04:17,349 Absolutely not. Thank you. 49 00:04:17,466 --> 00:04:18,433 Hi. 50 00:04:18,508 --> 00:04:20,351 Seriously, Dave, this isn't the dog track. 51 00:04:20,427 --> 00:04:22,179 Yeah. Good morning, Sabrina. 52 00:04:22,512 --> 00:04:24,514 Last week he told me my shoes were dangerously Italian. 53 00:04:24,681 --> 00:04:25,682 What? 54 00:04:26,099 --> 00:04:27,476 My turn with the Amalgamated files? 55 00:04:27,642 --> 00:04:30,441 Yeah, I adjusted the WACC to reflect the new monthly projections, 56 00:04:30,604 --> 00:04:34,199 and I pre-negotiated articles 23 to 29. 57 00:04:34,316 --> 00:04:35,363 Okay. 58 00:04:35,442 --> 00:04:37,285 I like the way you had it before, by the way. 59 00:04:37,444 --> 00:04:39,037 Yeah. Thank you. 60 00:04:53,460 --> 00:04:55,053 Good morning, Patricia. 61 00:04:59,604 --> 00:05:00,140 Hello? 62 00:05:00,140 --> 00:05:02,108 Penis, shit, vagina, cock, wolf pussies. 63 00:05:02,427 --> 00:05:04,100 Mitch. I'm at work. 64 00:05:04,596 --> 00:05:05,813 - Did I get you? - Yeah. You sure did. 65 00:05:05,889 --> 00:05:06,890 - You got me on speakerphone? - Yep. 66 00:05:07,015 --> 00:05:08,141 Did the secretary hear? 67 00:05:08,225 --> 00:05:10,319 Yes, the secretary heard. She heard it all. 68 00:05:10,977 --> 00:05:11,978 That's awesome. 69 00:05:12,062 --> 00:05:14,156 Not really. How stoned are you right now? 70 00:05:14,231 --> 00:05:15,232 I've taken some weed. 71 00:05:15,357 --> 00:05:16,324 - Have you? - Mm-hm. 72 00:05:16,399 --> 00:05:18,367 - You know what time it is? - Mm-mm. 73 00:05:18,443 --> 00:05:19,569 It's like 9:00. 74 00:05:19,694 --> 00:05:21,071 Holy fuck-knuckles. 75 00:05:21,238 --> 00:05:23,616 - Guess what I'm looking at right now. - A bong? 76 00:05:23,740 --> 00:05:26,414 No, I found a futon on the street last night. 77 00:05:26,576 --> 00:05:29,580 I sort of had to fight a bum for it. He was so thin. 78 00:05:29,746 --> 00:05:32,340 And it also came with this, uh, vintage Navajo pony blanket. 79 00:05:32,499 --> 00:05:34,342 So I think that's pretty much a win for me. 80 00:05:34,501 --> 00:05:36,219 Mitch, you know the adults are about to fire up a work day. 81 00:05:36,378 --> 00:05:38,642 I know, look, I just... I miss you, dude, that's all. 82 00:05:38,642 --> 00:05:39,330 I miss you, too. 83 00:05:39,330 --> 00:05:41,179 We've been super best buddies since third grade. 84 00:05:41,258 --> 00:05:42,384 I haven't seen you in forever. 85 00:05:42,599 --> 00:05:43,556 Oh, I've been swamped. 86 00:05:43,677 --> 00:05:44,803 And we're sleep-training the twins, 87 00:05:44,886 --> 00:05:46,058 I just haven't had a moment to breathe. 88 00:05:46,137 --> 00:05:48,105 I'm sorry, man. I'm just... I'm just super-excited to see you. 89 00:05:48,265 --> 00:05:49,687 We are still on for tonight, right? 90 00:05:51,184 --> 00:05:52,652 - David? - Yep. 91 00:05:52,811 --> 00:05:55,832 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. For the... for the, um, the thingy. 92 00:05:55,939 --> 00:05:58,692 Braves-Marlins. Please don't tell me that you forgot. 93 00:05:58,859 --> 00:06:00,031 Didn't-didn't forget. 94 00:06:00,575 --> 00:06:01,445 So, uh, what time are you gonna pick me up? 95 00:06:01,611 --> 00:06:02,658 Don't you bail on me, David. 96 00:06:02,737 --> 00:06:03,738 I am not gonna bail. 97 00:06:03,905 --> 00:06:06,374 If you bail on me, I'm gonna literally eye-rape you. 98 00:06:06,533 --> 00:06:07,580 I got it. 99 00:06:07,659 --> 00:06:11,584 I will actually place myself inside your ocular... Oh! 100 00:06:11,891 --> 00:06:12,755 It's my dad. 101 00:06:12,914 --> 00:06:15,087 Mitch Planko, Sr. making a rare appearance. 102 00:06:15,250 --> 00:06:17,048 This guy fucking hates me. 103 00:06:17,419 --> 00:06:19,262 - I'll pick you up at 6:00. - Got it. 104 00:06:19,421 --> 00:06:20,468 Kirk, out. 105 00:06:22,549 --> 00:06:23,596 Dad. 106 00:06:23,842 --> 00:06:25,139 What are you doing here? 107 00:06:25,552 --> 00:06:26,804 Oh, I just came by to tell you 108 00:06:26,887 --> 00:06:29,436 how incredibly proud of you I am, son. 109 00:06:29,639 --> 00:06:31,892 I'm pretty baked right now, 110 00:06:31,975 --> 00:06:33,943 but I think you're being sarcastic. 111 00:06:34,695 --> 00:06:35,066 Right? 112 00:06:35,145 --> 00:06:36,362 No, dropping out of high school 113 00:06:36,438 --> 00:06:38,190 to be an actor was a great decision. 114 00:06:38,565 --> 00:06:40,784 I saw you in that commercial for meat, incidentally. 115 00:06:40,942 --> 00:06:43,821 That was the most brilliant portrayal of baloney I have ever seen. 116 00:06:44,195 --> 00:06:45,196 Why are you here? 117 00:06:45,363 --> 00:06:47,832 Just came by to see if you'd like to have some breakfast. 118 00:06:47,991 --> 00:06:50,915 I can't. I got a super-duper important conference call in 10 minutes. 119 00:06:51,077 --> 00:06:53,421 - You don't have a job. - You don't have any hair. 120 00:06:53,580 --> 00:06:54,627 Right. 121 00:06:54,889 --> 00:06:57,050 Well, then I'll just say it here. 122 00:06:57,208 --> 00:06:58,585 I'm getting married again, 123 00:06:58,668 --> 00:07:01,467 and I'd like you to come to the wedding. 124 00:07:04,049 --> 00:07:06,347 - When's the wedding? - Next Saturday. 125 00:07:07,302 --> 00:07:09,270 My betrothed, Pamela, would like you 126 00:07:09,346 --> 00:07:11,269 to be there to say a few words. 127 00:07:12,307 --> 00:07:13,433 I'll catch the next one. 128 00:07:14,517 --> 00:07:18,291 Yeah, right. Okay, well, then I'd better get home 129 00:07:18,291 --> 00:07:21,108 and... boil my shoes. 130 00:07:21,650 --> 00:07:24,278 - Great visiting. - You, too. 131 00:07:28,782 --> 00:07:29,999 Good. 132 00:07:37,082 --> 00:07:42,027 And the baby-eating monster rises from the deep! 133 00:07:45,590 --> 00:07:47,718 Hey, daddy, which one do you like better? 134 00:07:47,884 --> 00:07:50,137 The southern monarch or the many-spotted skipperling? 135 00:07:50,303 --> 00:07:54,399 I am a many-spotted skipperling man, all the way. 136 00:07:54,557 --> 00:07:57,276 The monarch is just a glorified moth, don't you think? 137 00:07:57,435 --> 00:07:59,153 Yes. I tend to agree. 138 00:08:00,480 --> 00:08:02,574 - Hi, mom! - Hi! 139 00:08:02,649 --> 00:08:03,696 What a bad, bad day. 140 00:08:04,192 --> 00:08:05,159 Hi. 141 00:08:05,235 --> 00:08:08,739 The zoning board shut us down for... the millionth time. 142 00:08:08,905 --> 00:08:11,704 Dr. Klein lost the twins' immunization records. 143 00:08:11,866 --> 00:08:13,914 And Cara got bullied in ballet class again. 144 00:08:14,077 --> 00:08:15,420 Did you tell daddy? 145 00:08:15,578 --> 00:08:19,128 Nicolette Peters keeps knocking me over during the battement glisse. 146 00:08:19,290 --> 00:08:21,839 Oh, I'm sorry, sugarbug. Are you okay? 147 00:08:22,544 --> 00:08:25,718 We just need to keep striving for verbal resolution. 148 00:08:25,880 --> 00:08:28,759 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Uh, verbal resolution, sweetheart. 149 00:08:29,509 --> 00:08:31,261 So, where do you wanna do this tonight? 150 00:08:31,428 --> 00:08:32,429 Do what? 151 00:08:33,096 --> 00:08:36,154 - Dialogue night. Oh, my God. 152 00:08:37,225 --> 00:08:39,818 - Honey... - Don't even say that. 153 00:08:39,853 --> 00:08:43,615 I'm so sorry. I suck. 154 00:08:43,773 --> 00:08:46,868 Dr. Tillman said just once a week, for one hour. 155 00:08:47,027 --> 00:08:48,028 I'm sorry. 156 00:08:48,445 --> 00:08:50,911 - That was three months ago. - I know. I heard her. 157 00:08:51,573 --> 00:08:53,951 I-I wanna sit with you and talk with you for an hour 158 00:08:54,117 --> 00:08:56,961 once... more than once a week, but, I... tonight, I cannot. 159 00:08:57,120 --> 00:08:58,372 Why? What-what are you doing? 160 00:08:58,538 --> 00:09:00,165 I promised Mitch I'd sit and watch 161 00:09:00,248 --> 00:09:01,249 a game with him tonight, and... 162 00:09:01,416 --> 00:09:02,383 What? 163 00:09:02,459 --> 00:09:05,463 Can we please just slide the Dialogue night again? 164 00:09:05,545 --> 00:09:06,546 I'm so sorry. 165 00:09:08,882 --> 00:09:12,310 - I can do Monday night. - Thank you. 166 00:09:12,761 --> 00:09:13,808 He's early. 167 00:09:13,970 --> 00:09:15,563 Yeah, you'd be early, too, 168 00:09:15,638 --> 00:09:18,061 if all you did all day was eat hummus and masturbate. 169 00:09:18,141 --> 00:09:19,233 What's hummus? 170 00:09:19,392 --> 00:09:21,486 That is a Mediterranean spread, honey. 171 00:09:21,644 --> 00:09:22,896 What's master-ate? 172 00:09:23,063 --> 00:09:24,610 It's a cracker. 173 00:09:25,982 --> 00:09:27,780 Oh, hey, Mitch. Your hair looks good. 174 00:09:27,942 --> 00:09:28,989 Thanks. 175 00:09:29,152 --> 00:09:32,281 Yeah, I had to cut it for a fucking tampon commercial. 176 00:09:32,447 --> 00:09:33,494 Uncle Mitch! 177 00:09:33,573 --> 00:09:35,871 How's my favorite ballerina doing? 178 00:09:35,950 --> 00:09:38,169 - Hi, uncle Mitch. - Hi! Wow! 179 00:09:38,495 --> 00:09:40,668 Gosh, you're so light. Are you dieting? 180 00:09:40,830 --> 00:09:42,582 Do you wanna come to my dance recital? 181 00:09:42,791 --> 00:09:43,883 Oh! 182 00:09:44,084 --> 00:09:46,007 No, honey. 183 00:09:46,169 --> 00:09:48,171 The only style of dancing that uncle Mitch likes 184 00:09:48,338 --> 00:09:51,808 involves a big, shiny pole, and a broken woman with daddy issues. 185 00:09:53,301 --> 00:09:54,473 Yeah, story time is over. 186 00:09:54,636 --> 00:09:56,183 Go fix your hair. 187 00:09:56,262 --> 00:09:57,263 Ow. 188 00:09:57,764 --> 00:09:59,141 Mm, smells good in here, Jame. 189 00:09:59,224 --> 00:10:00,225 Mm. 190 00:10:01,017 --> 00:10:02,314 Ooh! Num-nums! 191 00:10:02,936 --> 00:10:04,028 Vegetable medley! 192 00:10:04,187 --> 00:10:06,189 - How are you? - Good. 193 00:10:06,356 --> 00:10:07,699 - You're good? - Yeah. 194 00:10:07,857 --> 00:10:09,200 Are you dating anyone? 195 00:10:09,359 --> 00:10:10,861 - Ooh! You know who I ran into? - Who? 196 00:10:11,194 --> 00:10:13,868 Mrs. Hickham. At a Starbucks in Druid Hills. 197 00:10:14,030 --> 00:10:15,828 - Our social studies teacher? - Yeah. 198 00:10:15,990 --> 00:10:17,537 I asked her out and she wouldn't go out with me, 199 00:10:17,700 --> 00:10:19,623 which is crazy, cause I nailed her in high school. 200 00:10:19,828 --> 00:10:22,877 - You did? - I dated her mouth for a full semester. 201 00:10:23,498 --> 00:10:27,048 - Okay. - Bathed, diapered, and in the PJs. 202 00:10:27,293 --> 00:10:29,546 Is Dave meeting your needs, sexually? 203 00:10:30,171 --> 00:10:32,299 - Yeah, I guess. - Good. 204 00:10:32,882 --> 00:10:34,281 - Not really. - Ahh. 205 00:10:34,281 --> 00:10:34,884 Mm-mm. 206 00:10:34,717 --> 00:10:37,015 I would like to strap you to my face and say the alphabet. 207 00:10:37,720 --> 00:10:39,313 That's going too far. 208 00:10:39,389 --> 00:10:40,606 Oh! 209 00:10:41,057 --> 00:10:44,903 Look at these little fuckers! 210 00:10:46,354 --> 00:10:48,527 What's your name? Hey. 211 00:10:48,690 --> 00:10:51,034 What's your name? What's your name? 212 00:10:51,192 --> 00:10:53,536 Why can't they talk yet? Are they retarded or something? 213 00:10:53,695 --> 00:10:54,912 Don't say... You can't say that. 214 00:10:55,071 --> 00:10:57,494 Well, this one right here looks a little... a little Downsy. 215 00:10:57,657 --> 00:10:59,830 - Or that. - I'm kidding. 216 00:10:59,993 --> 00:11:01,370 - A little bit, though? - No. 217 00:11:01,536 --> 00:11:03,584 Pumpkin, we'll see you right after the game, okay? 218 00:11:03,746 --> 00:11:04,838 Have fun. 219 00:11:05,248 --> 00:11:07,250 I like it. Oh, God. 220 00:11:07,417 --> 00:11:10,011 - Let's go. - Okay. Bye. 221 00:11:13,089 --> 00:11:14,432 Mitch and Dave. 222 00:11:14,591 --> 00:11:16,719 Mitch and Dave, out on the town. 223 00:11:16,885 --> 00:11:18,683 Oh, dude, I didn't tell you! 224 00:11:18,845 --> 00:11:20,438 I booked a major movie role this week. 225 00:11:20,513 --> 00:11:21,897 I auditioned for a movie role, I got it. 226 00:11:21,897 --> 00:11:23,732 - Yeah, first one. - Hey, good for you. What's it called? 227 00:11:23,892 --> 00:11:25,565 Untitled Awesome Movie. 228 00:11:25,727 --> 00:11:27,274 Truly? That's the name? 229 00:11:27,437 --> 00:11:28,939 - Yeah. - Yeah. Good for you. 230 00:11:29,105 --> 00:11:31,199 - Do you wanna hotbox this nut sack? - No, no. No, I'm good. 231 00:11:31,357 --> 00:11:33,735 - I've got a big day tomorrow. - Take the wheel. Steer. Steering wheel. 232 00:11:33,902 --> 00:11:35,028 Oh, steer for me. 233 00:11:35,195 --> 00:11:36,697 Mitch, come on, buddy. 234 00:11:36,863 --> 00:11:40,083 Let's make it to the game in one piece, don't you think? 235 00:11:40,241 --> 00:11:43,120 Wanna try that? This Fiero, unfortunately, is, uh, airbag-free. 236 00:11:43,286 --> 00:11:44,412 It's a work day tomorrow. 237 00:11:44,579 --> 00:11:47,298 - Come on. - All right, I'll take one hit. 238 00:11:47,415 --> 00:11:49,759 Oh! What the... You, motherfucker! 239 00:11:49,918 --> 00:11:51,215 Let's just focus on the driving. 240 00:11:51,377 --> 00:11:54,256 Just say no, Reagan. God, why would you do that? 241 00:11:54,422 --> 00:11:55,924 - Well, we're driving. - God! 242 00:11:56,090 --> 00:11:58,468 This is a car... carrying a lot of speed. 243 00:11:58,635 --> 00:12:01,138 Hit the steering wheel. I'm going again! 244 00:12:07,894 --> 00:12:08,986 Whoo! Drink! 245 00:12:08,978 --> 00:12:11,606 I'll drink to that. All right! That was a strikeout. 246 00:12:12,899 --> 00:12:15,368 Huh, what's going on? It is good to see you again. 247 00:12:15,485 --> 00:12:16,987 It's good to see you, too, Dave. 248 00:12:17,153 --> 00:12:18,450 What's going on with the women, huh? 249 00:12:18,613 --> 00:12:21,583 I've been... I've been seeing a number of very, very nice ladies. 250 00:12:21,991 --> 00:12:24,414 - I got some... pictures. - Wow. 251 00:12:24,661 --> 00:12:27,352 - That is Tatiana. - Tatiana. 252 00:12:27,352 --> 00:12:28,335 Tatiana. 253 00:12:28,498 --> 00:12:29,624 What's her last name? 254 00:12:29,791 --> 00:12:33,841 It's Tatiana Calls-me-at-three-in-the-morning- and-wants-to-fuck-stein. 255 00:12:34,003 --> 00:12:35,630 Who gives a shit what her last name is? 256 00:12:36,005 --> 00:12:38,508 Mitch. Reminds me a little bit of Sabrina. 257 00:12:38,675 --> 00:12:40,348 Yeah! Wait, who's Sabrina? 258 00:12:40,510 --> 00:12:42,877 Sabrina. She's this... 259 00:12:43,179 --> 00:12:45,352 She's this new law associate at my work. 260 00:12:45,515 --> 00:12:48,394 She's so hot. Oh, Mitch, is she hot. 261 00:12:48,518 --> 00:12:51,146 She's like fall-out-of-a-magazine hot, you know? 262 00:12:51,312 --> 00:12:53,155 I bet-I bet she's number one on your cancer list, right? 263 00:12:53,231 --> 00:12:54,232 What's that? 264 00:12:54,315 --> 00:12:55,692 - Come on, you know what that is. - What's that? 265 00:12:55,858 --> 00:12:57,280 Every married guy has a cancer list. 266 00:12:57,360 --> 00:12:58,953 It's the first three women you'd have sex with 267 00:12:59,028 --> 00:13:00,371 if your wife suddenly died of cancer. 268 00:13:00,530 --> 00:13:02,203 That's fucking sick. 269 00:13:02,282 --> 00:13:03,534 Come on. That's the mother of my children. 270 00:13:03,616 --> 00:13:04,617 Oh, I know. 271 00:13:04,701 --> 00:13:07,204 But I'll play. Yes, yes, she'd be at the top of that list. 272 00:13:07,370 --> 00:13:08,542 - Yeah, it's like a gift. - Yeah. 273 00:13:08,705 --> 00:13:10,878 But I interrupted you. Tell me about this one again. 274 00:13:11,040 --> 00:13:13,759 God, last week, Tatiana, she comes over, 275 00:13:14,085 --> 00:13:15,587 she's wearing this tight black mini-dress, 276 00:13:15,670 --> 00:13:16,717 and you know what she says to me? 277 00:13:17,005 --> 00:13:18,382 - Tell me slow. - No, nothing. 278 00:13:18,548 --> 00:13:20,550 Because all Tatiana wants to do at 3:00 in the morning 279 00:13:20,717 --> 00:13:22,765 is fucky, fucky, rubber ducky. 280 00:13:22,927 --> 00:13:25,350 This chick is insatiable! 281 00:13:25,513 --> 00:13:27,891 She wants it in every position under the sun. 282 00:13:28,057 --> 00:13:29,274 God, you're so lucky. 283 00:13:29,434 --> 00:13:31,857 We do the Wheelbarrow, the Arabian Goggles, 284 00:13:32,020 --> 00:13:34,273 the Lonesome Dove, the Arsenio Hall, 285 00:13:34,439 --> 00:13:37,568 the Jelly Donut, the Pastrami Sandwich, the Wolfgang Puck... 286 00:13:37,734 --> 00:13:39,736 And let me tell you something. Hey, no man is that hungry. 287 00:13:39,902 --> 00:13:41,370 What? I don't even know what these are. 288 00:13:41,529 --> 00:13:43,452 - You're married. You're married, Dave. - That's true. 289 00:13:43,614 --> 00:13:45,082 Anyway, we start going at it 290 00:13:45,366 --> 00:13:48,040 and it gets so intense that my nose starts bleeding. 291 00:13:48,119 --> 00:13:49,166 Come on. 292 00:13:49,245 --> 00:13:51,668 This is Dracula, Anne Rice-type shit 293 00:13:51,748 --> 00:13:52,874 happening right in front of me. 294 00:13:52,957 --> 00:13:54,004 Good for you. 295 00:13:54,083 --> 00:13:56,461 When all is said and done, when we finish up, and the dust settles, 296 00:13:56,627 --> 00:13:58,254 she looks up at me, and she says 297 00:13:58,421 --> 00:14:02,801 "Mitchell, next Tuesday, I am coming back here, 298 00:14:02,967 --> 00:14:05,095 "and we're really gonna fuck." 299 00:14:05,595 --> 00:14:06,767 Yes! 300 00:14:06,929 --> 00:14:09,432 Yes! Tatiana. 301 00:14:09,599 --> 00:14:11,727 Fuck. Mitch. Mitch, Mitch, Mitch. 302 00:14:11,893 --> 00:14:12,940 You're just... 303 00:14:13,394 --> 00:14:14,737 How did I miss this? 304 00:14:14,896 --> 00:14:17,945 I just... I missed all the sex and the drugs and the bad choices, 305 00:14:18,107 --> 00:14:21,077 and I just fucking rushed it, didn't I? Wasn't I rushing? 306 00:14:21,152 --> 00:14:22,244 You were busy. 307 00:14:22,320 --> 00:14:23,788 Rushing to get into a good college, right? 308 00:14:23,946 --> 00:14:25,368 And then into a good law school. 309 00:14:25,448 --> 00:14:26,791 Once I got into a good law school, 310 00:14:26,908 --> 00:14:28,205 I just wanted to get into a good law firm, right? 311 00:14:28,284 --> 00:14:30,457 I met Jamie, we got married, we had Cara, and that was it. 312 00:14:30,620 --> 00:14:33,965 I pissed away my 20s, right? Now it's too late. 313 00:14:34,415 --> 00:14:36,759 Look, shitbird. You got it made! 314 00:14:36,918 --> 00:14:38,841 You have an extremely hot wife, 315 00:14:39,003 --> 00:14:40,926 and you got a beautiful house 316 00:14:41,089 --> 00:14:44,093 that's full of furniture and food and... kids. 317 00:14:44,258 --> 00:14:45,510 And you make a ton of money. 318 00:14:45,676 --> 00:14:47,349 And you come home at the end of the day 319 00:14:47,512 --> 00:14:50,607 and you're surrounded by people who give a shit about you. 320 00:14:51,015 --> 00:14:53,109 You're never lonely. 321 00:14:53,267 --> 00:14:54,314 What more do you want? 322 00:14:54,477 --> 00:14:56,070 I'll tell you what I want, okay? 323 00:14:56,145 --> 00:14:57,362 I want something different. 324 00:14:57,480 --> 00:14:59,198 I want your life, you know? 325 00:14:59,357 --> 00:15:02,031 I-I-I want Sabrina. I want Tatiana. 326 00:15:02,443 --> 00:15:04,616 And sex with strange, new women. 327 00:15:04,779 --> 00:15:05,780 You're living the dream. 328 00:15:05,947 --> 00:15:08,541 How much fun is it being an actor, working one week a year? 329 00:15:08,699 --> 00:15:11,202 I wanna smoke weed all day. 330 00:15:11,369 --> 00:15:14,339 I wanna... I wanna start a... a book that I actually finish. 331 00:15:14,497 --> 00:15:16,670 I would like to take a nice, solid dump 332 00:15:16,791 --> 00:15:18,919 because I'm not constantly stressed out. 333 00:15:19,335 --> 00:15:21,838 I wanna... I wanna learn how to rollerblade. 334 00:15:23,005 --> 00:15:23,972 And I'd like to take a piss. 335 00:15:24,048 --> 00:15:25,800 Me, too. Fountain, fountain, fountain. 336 00:15:26,008 --> 00:15:27,180 Perfect. 337 00:15:35,810 --> 00:15:37,187 Whoo! 338 00:15:40,731 --> 00:15:43,450 This chick does not look happy. 339 00:15:43,526 --> 00:15:46,450 You know, I was just saying that I-I-I really envy your life. 340 00:15:46,529 --> 00:15:47,621 - That's all. - I envy yours. 341 00:15:47,697 --> 00:15:49,540 No, you don't. You're just trying to be nice. 342 00:15:49,699 --> 00:15:51,292 I'm not tryin'... I do, I envy it. 343 00:15:51,451 --> 00:15:52,873 No. I envy yours. 344 00:15:53,035 --> 00:15:55,037 - I wish I had your life. - I wish I had your life. 345 00:16:17,435 --> 00:16:18,982 It's rolling blackouts or something? 346 00:16:19,145 --> 00:16:20,397 Yeah, I guess. 347 00:16:22,440 --> 00:16:25,819 And look at your flow, it's so... it's nice and it's thick. 348 00:16:26,027 --> 00:16:27,028 It's confident. 349 00:16:27,153 --> 00:16:30,157 - Yours is very steamy. - Thanks. 350 00:16:30,406 --> 00:16:32,329 My urologist says I run a little hot. 351 00:16:32,492 --> 00:16:33,789 - Good to go? - Oh, yeah. 352 00:16:33,951 --> 00:16:36,625 - Can you drive? - Oh, yeah! 353 00:16:59,143 --> 00:17:00,645 Holy fuck-knuckles! 354 00:17:00,811 --> 00:17:02,984 Where is my bong? 355 00:17:04,982 --> 00:17:07,451 Whose fucking kid is that? 356 00:17:08,152 --> 00:17:11,156 What is with all these goddamn pillows? 357 00:17:15,952 --> 00:17:17,625 Jamie! Jesus! 358 00:17:17,828 --> 00:17:19,922 - What? - That's fucking disgusting! 359 00:17:20,081 --> 00:17:22,425 Put those tits away, this isn't Africa! 360 00:17:22,625 --> 00:17:25,128 What am I doing in this bed? Did I sleep here last night? 361 00:17:25,294 --> 00:17:26,921 Did I fucking nail you? 362 00:17:27,129 --> 00:17:28,472 Are you still drunk? 363 00:17:30,341 --> 00:17:31,342 Dave! 364 00:17:32,301 --> 00:17:33,769 Where is Lockwood? 365 00:17:37,682 --> 00:17:39,810 What the fuck? 366 00:17:39,976 --> 00:17:42,149 Oh, my God. 367 00:17:42,311 --> 00:17:43,813 I'm Dave? 368 00:17:47,108 --> 00:17:48,485 Oh, my God! 369 00:17:55,324 --> 00:17:57,543 Open the goddamn door, Dave. 370 00:17:58,995 --> 00:18:01,293 Come on, open up the door, right now. 371 00:18:01,455 --> 00:18:02,547 Fuck. 372 00:18:03,165 --> 00:18:04,963 Come on, buddy, open up the door immediately. 373 00:18:05,126 --> 00:18:06,719 Let's do it. 374 00:18:08,713 --> 00:18:11,341 Dave, come on. Open up the door, right now! 375 00:18:13,050 --> 00:18:15,223 - Okay, I'm awake. - Open up this fucking door! 376 00:18:24,020 --> 00:18:25,942 Open the goddamn door, Dave! 377 00:18:25,942 --> 00:18:26,920 Mitch? 378 00:18:27,231 --> 00:18:28,858 Why am I in your apartment? 379 00:18:29,525 --> 00:18:31,027 Dave, hurry up, open up the door! 380 00:18:33,904 --> 00:18:36,032 Something very bad has happened. Wait till you see me. 381 00:18:36,198 --> 00:18:37,825 - Wait until you see you! - Jesus Christ, relax. 382 00:18:37,992 --> 00:18:40,040 Super freaky, dude. Let's do it! 383 00:18:41,537 --> 00:18:42,789 Oh. 384 00:18:44,832 --> 00:18:45,879 What the hell is this? 385 00:18:46,417 --> 00:18:49,512 I knew it. Oh, my God. 386 00:18:49,670 --> 00:18:52,674 Jesus Christ, what the fuck is this? 387 00:18:53,549 --> 00:18:55,347 Look at this. 388 00:18:56,344 --> 00:18:58,221 Yeah, it's you. 389 00:18:59,930 --> 00:19:02,683 And this is all me. All of this shit's mine. 390 00:19:02,850 --> 00:19:03,897 You're welcome. 391 00:19:04,060 --> 00:19:05,107 I got this. 392 00:19:05,269 --> 00:19:06,395 What are you doing to me? 393 00:19:06,562 --> 00:19:08,906 - Hey, stop it. - I'm so strong. 394 00:19:09,440 --> 00:19:10,862 You're choking yourself! 395 00:19:11,025 --> 00:19:12,777 Must wake up. 396 00:19:12,943 --> 00:19:13,990 Wake up! 397 00:19:14,070 --> 00:19:16,118 I can't breathe. Take my hands off you. 398 00:19:16,197 --> 00:19:18,541 - Wake up! - Get the fuck off me! 399 00:19:21,744 --> 00:19:23,087 Okay, okay, okay! 400 00:19:23,663 --> 00:19:25,586 Go look in the mirror. Right there! 401 00:19:27,958 --> 00:19:28,959 All right? 402 00:19:30,753 --> 00:19:31,754 I'm a douche bag. 403 00:19:31,921 --> 00:19:32,968 I'm a fucking tool! 404 00:19:32,968 --> 00:19:35,257 Oh! What did you do? 405 00:19:35,424 --> 00:19:36,767 What did I do? You think I want to be you? 406 00:19:36,926 --> 00:19:38,178 Who said I wanted to be you? 407 00:19:39,887 --> 00:19:41,764 Holy shit, we did. 408 00:19:43,265 --> 00:19:44,266 We wished for each other's lives 409 00:19:44,433 --> 00:19:46,902 when we were pissing in that fucking fountain last night. 410 00:19:47,061 --> 00:19:48,404 We wished we had each other's lives. 411 00:19:48,562 --> 00:19:49,779 I was just trying to be nice! 412 00:19:49,939 --> 00:19:51,566 Oh, my God! 413 00:19:52,233 --> 00:19:53,780 I know a shortcut to the fountain. 414 00:19:53,943 --> 00:19:55,305 Go this way. Go this way! 415 00:19:57,571 --> 00:19:58,618 Careful! Easy. 416 00:19:58,781 --> 00:20:00,283 I got it. I got it. 417 00:20:09,125 --> 00:20:10,627 What are we gonna do when we get to the fountain? 418 00:20:10,710 --> 00:20:11,757 We're gonna take a piss in it, or... 419 00:20:11,919 --> 00:20:14,297 I don't give a shit. We're gonna get our lives back. 420 00:20:17,299 --> 00:20:18,642 You gotta be kidding me. 421 00:20:22,972 --> 00:20:24,315 Hey, where is the fountain? 422 00:20:24,724 --> 00:20:25,725 It is getting restored. 423 00:20:25,891 --> 00:20:28,110 - What are you talking about, restored? - Where did you take it? 424 00:20:28,394 --> 00:20:29,862 I don't know, guy, I just fill the hole. 425 00:20:29,937 --> 00:20:30,938 I'm not the fountain spokesman. 426 00:20:31,230 --> 00:20:33,073 Hey, motherfucker... 427 00:20:33,232 --> 00:20:34,484 Whoa, whoa, who-who could tell us where it is? 428 00:20:35,651 --> 00:20:36,903 Maybe ask the district manager. 429 00:20:54,462 --> 00:20:56,339 Nope. It's not in the computer. 430 00:20:56,839 --> 00:20:59,809 Okay, when will it be in the computer? When will it be in th computer? 431 00:20:59,967 --> 00:21:01,969 Maybe tomorrow. That's when Victor gets back. 432 00:21:02,136 --> 00:21:05,065 - It's not in the computer, it's not in the park. - And who-who is Victor? Who's Victor? 433 00:21:05,065 --> 00:21:07,353 The guy that knows how to find shit in the computer. 434 00:21:07,516 --> 00:21:09,234 How can you lose a fountain? 435 00:21:09,351 --> 00:21:11,479 - This is a big deal to us, okay? - I mean, it's a fountain! 436 00:21:11,645 --> 00:21:14,023 - Can you look a little bit harder? - That's incredible! 437 00:21:14,190 --> 00:21:15,533 It's not in the computer. 438 00:21:15,691 --> 00:21:18,035 Yeah, but your attitude is right on your shoulders. 439 00:21:18,194 --> 00:21:19,491 No, no, no! 440 00:21:19,653 --> 00:21:21,200 There was no physical contact. 441 00:21:21,363 --> 00:21:23,957 We're... okay. We're fine. We're fine. 442 00:21:24,533 --> 00:21:27,082 I have the biggest meeting in my life in 45 minutes. This isn't happening. 443 00:21:27,161 --> 00:21:28,378 Did you have something you wanted to do today? 444 00:21:28,537 --> 00:21:30,039 I got day one of my big break movie. 445 00:21:30,206 --> 00:21:31,554 You don't understand. If I don't make this meeting, 446 00:21:31,554 --> 00:21:32,597 I don't make partner. If I don't make partner, 447 00:21:32,597 --> 00:21:34,957 the last 15 years of my life, everything I've done, wasted! 448 00:21:34,957 --> 00:21:35,886 All right, fine, I'll do it. 449 00:21:36,295 --> 00:21:38,389 I got it. I'll do it. 450 00:21:39,507 --> 00:21:41,054 - I got you. - Do what? 451 00:21:41,217 --> 00:21:42,389 I'm an actor. Human chameleon. 452 00:21:42,551 --> 00:21:43,973 I can do lawyer in my fucking sleep. Give me the keys. 453 00:21:44,136 --> 00:21:45,558 Oh, you'll play me in one of your productions? 454 00:21:45,721 --> 00:21:47,018 - Yeah, give me the keys. - Okay, no. 455 00:21:47,181 --> 00:21:49,309 - Why? - Because you're... 456 00:21:49,391 --> 00:21:50,483 Careful. 457 00:21:51,227 --> 00:21:54,196 Because there's more to being a lawyer than what you see on TV, Mitch. 458 00:21:54,196 --> 00:21:54,814 - Is there? - Yeah. 459 00:21:54,980 --> 00:21:57,153 - I object! - Oh, my God. 460 00:21:57,316 --> 00:21:58,488 - Okay? - No! 461 00:21:58,651 --> 00:22:01,404 Wrong, my friend. You don't know the first thing about being a lawyer. 462 00:22:01,570 --> 00:22:02,571 You're not a trained actor. 463 00:22:02,738 --> 00:22:03,910 Neither are you. 464 00:22:04,073 --> 00:22:05,325 Save it, all right, Dave? 465 00:22:05,407 --> 00:22:06,579 It's one day. We're Mitch and Dave! 466 00:22:06,659 --> 00:22:08,411 We can do one day of anything. Give me the keys. 467 00:22:09,878 --> 00:22:11,372 Let's go. Do you have a better plan? 468 00:22:11,831 --> 00:22:13,378 Shit. Okay. Okay. All right. 469 00:22:13,541 --> 00:22:15,339 - Okay. Okay. You got 41 minutes, okay? - Great! 470 00:22:15,501 --> 00:22:17,969 You go-go to my house, you get dressed in my clothes. 471 00:22:18,045 --> 00:22:20,844 And then you go to my office, find my legal associate, Sabrina. 472 00:22:21,006 --> 00:22:22,599 Get the merger documents from her, 473 00:22:22,675 --> 00:22:24,518 and take them to the conference room, and then... 474 00:22:24,677 --> 00:22:26,099 Oh, God, the partners are gonna be there. 475 00:22:26,262 --> 00:22:29,607 Just listen, do not say a single word. 476 00:22:29,765 --> 00:22:30,766 What if somebody asks me a question? 477 00:22:30,933 --> 00:22:32,560 They're not gonna ask you a damn thing. 478 00:22:32,726 --> 00:22:34,444 Once the meeting starts, you will continue to say nothing. 479 00:22:34,603 --> 00:22:36,401 When a partner asks you for the merger documents, 480 00:22:36,564 --> 00:22:39,443 you will then silently hand them over. 481 00:22:39,608 --> 00:22:41,281 Yeah. I get it. Play it big, but maintain my reality. 482 00:22:41,443 --> 00:22:42,615 - It's pretty simple. - No! You play it small. 483 00:22:42,778 --> 00:22:44,155 Because I've spent the last nine months 484 00:22:44,238 --> 00:22:45,535 banging out the terms of this deal. 485 00:22:45,698 --> 00:22:47,871 The only thing that you gotta do is hand over the documents, that's it. 486 00:22:47,950 --> 00:22:48,951 Dude, easy as fuck. 487 00:22:49,118 --> 00:22:51,120 You can't say things like that in the meeting, Mitch. 488 00:22:51,287 --> 00:22:52,288 True. Good note. 489 00:22:52,454 --> 00:22:54,923 For me, you go to my house, okay? All my info is on my fridge. 490 00:22:55,082 --> 00:22:57,005 When you get to the set, you go to hair and makeup, 491 00:22:57,084 --> 00:22:58,085 and you learn your lines. 492 00:22:58,252 --> 00:23:00,596 Most of all, do not fuck this up for me, all right? 493 00:23:00,754 --> 00:23:03,633 This is my big break, my "Raging Bull". Do you hear me? 494 00:23:03,799 --> 00:23:05,767 You respect my art, you respect my life. 495 00:23:05,926 --> 00:23:06,927 You respect mine. 496 00:23:07,094 --> 00:23:08,596 - Yeah, I got you. Power hug. Come on. - Yeah, okay. 497 00:23:10,723 --> 00:23:12,646 Whoa, whoa, whoa! Hold on. You gotta pick up Cara. 498 00:23:12,808 --> 00:23:14,810 Pick up Cara from ballet at 4:00, okay? 499 00:23:14,977 --> 00:23:16,320 I am fucking all over that shit. 500 00:23:16,478 --> 00:23:18,071 Holy shit. 501 00:23:31,911 --> 00:23:34,505 Early morning on the golf course, Lockwood? 502 00:23:34,663 --> 00:23:36,290 Ha-ha! Terrific! 503 00:23:45,841 --> 00:23:47,013 Num-nums! 504 00:23:47,426 --> 00:23:49,019 Fucking score! 505 00:23:49,428 --> 00:23:51,146 Fucking grocery store. 506 00:23:52,264 --> 00:23:56,144 Look at all of this for little Mitchie-poo. 507 00:23:56,685 --> 00:23:57,777 Nice! 508 00:23:58,562 --> 00:23:59,859 Oh, there you are. 509 00:23:59,939 --> 00:24:02,658 I redid the 10-19 variants, everything else is the same. Ready? 510 00:24:03,525 --> 00:24:05,027 Oh, you must be Sabrina, huh? 511 00:24:05,861 --> 00:24:06,953 You must be Dave. 512 00:24:07,029 --> 00:24:08,781 Are we role-playing or something? Cause we're late. 513 00:24:09,031 --> 00:24:11,033 He didn't tell me you were a big, fat, fucking boner. 514 00:24:12,993 --> 00:24:14,791 Sorry. That was unprofessional. Wasn't it? 515 00:24:15,204 --> 00:24:17,548 Dave have a mimosa for breakfast? A little nervous? 516 00:24:17,706 --> 00:24:18,707 That was a joke. Hey... 517 00:24:18,874 --> 00:24:20,876 I got one really important question before we go. 518 00:24:21,043 --> 00:24:22,886 All this-this food here, is it free? 519 00:24:25,506 --> 00:24:26,507 You got this. 520 00:24:26,674 --> 00:24:27,675 Yeah, I got it. 521 00:24:27,800 --> 00:24:28,847 - I got it. - Okay. 522 00:24:29,009 --> 00:24:30,010 Let's do this. 523 00:24:30,094 --> 00:24:31,721 All right. You remember though? 524 00:24:31,887 --> 00:24:34,106 Oh, right. It's down there. Got it. 525 00:24:54,785 --> 00:24:56,628 - Lockwood. - Yep. 526 00:24:57,579 --> 00:25:00,378 Perhaps you would like to sit on our side of the table. 527 00:25:02,751 --> 00:25:03,877 Thanks. 528 00:25:09,091 --> 00:25:11,264 Now, before we formalize this merger, 529 00:25:11,427 --> 00:25:15,148 are there any outstanding questions we might address? 530 00:25:15,764 --> 00:25:17,311 Our back-of-the-envelope analysis 531 00:25:17,766 --> 00:25:21,441 shows your P&L to be 2% less than expected 532 00:25:21,603 --> 00:25:22,775 as per the MAC clause. 533 00:25:23,605 --> 00:25:25,778 Can I get confirmation that the EBITDA 534 00:25:25,941 --> 00:25:28,160 still aligns with comfortable... 535 00:25:29,278 --> 00:25:30,279 Dave? 536 00:25:32,573 --> 00:25:34,792 - Dave! - Yes. Dave's here. 537 00:25:37,286 --> 00:25:39,903 - Hey, man. - Hey. 538 00:25:40,022 --> 00:25:41,172 Oh, I got your thing. 539 00:25:42,541 --> 00:25:43,542 Boom! 540 00:25:43,959 --> 00:25:45,632 No, Dave, uh... 541 00:25:45,794 --> 00:25:49,515 Mr. Kinkabe had a question about the EBITDA. 542 00:25:54,470 --> 00:25:55,471 Okay. 543 00:25:56,918 --> 00:25:59,475 Uh... how is it? 544 00:26:03,145 --> 00:26:04,146 Good. 545 00:26:06,106 --> 00:26:07,483 Good? 546 00:26:09,151 --> 00:26:10,368 What am I saying? 547 00:26:10,527 --> 00:26:12,154 EBITDA is bad. 548 00:26:13,280 --> 00:26:14,372 Fucking terrible. 549 00:26:16,325 --> 00:26:18,703 Are you saying the premium needs to be adjusted? 550 00:26:19,036 --> 00:26:20,037 I didn't say that. 551 00:26:20,204 --> 00:26:21,956 Did you hear me say it? No. 552 00:26:22,122 --> 00:26:23,123 What about our WACC? 553 00:26:23,707 --> 00:26:25,584 - Huh? - What PPS multiple are you using? 554 00:26:25,667 --> 00:26:27,669 -What's that? - Is the financing still stable? 555 00:26:27,753 --> 00:26:28,800 Hang on, guys. 556 00:26:28,879 --> 00:26:31,723 Like fucking 25 guys on this side. Can you fire at somebody else? 557 00:26:32,094 --> 00:26:33,259 Anybody else field the fucking question? 558 00:26:33,425 --> 00:26:35,098 - Dave? - Yep. 559 00:26:35,260 --> 00:26:37,683 It's your job to know this. 560 00:26:37,930 --> 00:26:39,128 Yeah, I know that. 561 00:26:39,128 --> 00:26:43,273 That's, uh... You know, we're, uh... We're... Everything is... 562 00:26:44,019 --> 00:26:45,020 Here is the deal. 563 00:26:45,854 --> 00:26:47,948 We are very rich. 564 00:26:48,107 --> 00:26:49,905 Everybody rich! 565 00:26:50,943 --> 00:26:52,570 So let's sign this. 566 00:26:52,736 --> 00:26:55,535 So, what's the worst that can happen? Right? 567 00:26:55,697 --> 00:26:57,995 We will just roll this party out, uh, 568 00:26:58,117 --> 00:27:00,415 to some sushi and some sake bombs. 569 00:27:00,577 --> 00:27:03,706 Moustache is buying. And then a little karaoke for dessert? 570 00:27:03,872 --> 00:27:05,044 I mean, what do we got to lose? 571 00:27:05,207 --> 00:27:08,051 Let's bones that. Huh, 'stache? 572 00:27:08,210 --> 00:27:09,587 Is this some kind of joke? 573 00:27:10,045 --> 00:27:11,422 Are you trying to poison the well? 574 00:27:11,588 --> 00:27:13,636 You are the one on a fishing expedition, Kinkabe. 575 00:27:13,799 --> 00:27:15,722 You were never serious about this merger. 576 00:27:15,801 --> 00:27:16,848 Me? 577 00:27:16,927 --> 00:27:19,555 This moron works for you. You are the one sabotaging it. 578 00:27:19,721 --> 00:27:21,769 Fuck you with that... "Moron" is a bad word here. 579 00:27:21,932 --> 00:27:22,933 This merger is over. 580 00:27:23,100 --> 00:27:26,320 You have just made the biggest mistake of your career, mister. 581 00:27:26,478 --> 00:27:28,071 - I will see you in court. - No, no. 582 00:27:28,230 --> 00:27:30,483 What a bunch of bullshit! 583 00:27:31,400 --> 00:27:32,902 Hang on, hang on. Don't get up. Don't get up, don't get up. 584 00:27:33,068 --> 00:27:35,241 Is this a break? Taking a break? 585 00:27:36,071 --> 00:27:37,288 Right? Quick fiver? 586 00:27:39,408 --> 00:27:40,580 What the hell was that? 587 00:27:40,742 --> 00:27:42,995 Relax. This is good. 588 00:27:43,162 --> 00:27:44,414 Look at how great this is. 589 00:27:44,580 --> 00:27:48,084 It's all part of my... of my secret master plan. 590 00:27:48,250 --> 00:27:49,752 - It is? - You betcha. 591 00:27:49,918 --> 00:27:50,919 You're hurtin' my arm a little bit. 592 00:27:52,921 --> 00:27:55,800 This deal is critical to the very survival of this firm. 593 00:27:55,966 --> 00:27:57,309 - Is that clear? - I got it. 594 00:27:57,759 --> 00:27:59,887 I know what I'm doin'. I've been doin' it for... 595 00:27:59,970 --> 00:28:01,347 How long have I been doin' it here, huh? 596 00:28:01,513 --> 00:28:03,539 How long have I worked here? You know that. 597 00:28:03,539 --> 00:28:04,645 I don't know. 598 00:28:05,017 --> 00:28:06,564 - Nine years, ten. - Yeah. 599 00:28:06,768 --> 00:28:07,220 - Yeah. - Perfect. 600 00:28:07,220 --> 00:28:09,192 Exactly 10 years, that's exactly right. 601 00:28:09,192 --> 00:28:10,856 And have I ever steered you wrong? 602 00:28:11,440 --> 00:28:12,487 No. 603 00:28:13,942 --> 00:28:16,053 - Trust me, bro. - Bro? 604 00:28:17,946 --> 00:28:18,947 Fine. 605 00:28:19,198 --> 00:28:22,623 But from here on out, you are on an extremely short leash! 606 00:28:22,784 --> 00:28:23,876 Understand? 607 00:28:24,036 --> 00:28:26,630 Now, go. Put on some proper clothes. 608 00:28:26,788 --> 00:28:27,880 You look like a Jew. 609 00:28:28,624 --> 00:28:29,796 Oh. 610 00:28:32,502 --> 00:28:35,130 Excuse me, hello. Where do the movie stars park? 611 00:28:45,140 --> 00:28:47,017 - Hello, there. - Hey, man. What's up? 612 00:28:48,310 --> 00:28:49,903 Where the fuck is hair and makeup? 613 00:28:50,062 --> 00:28:51,689 Mitch Planko. Fuck me. 614 00:28:55,150 --> 00:28:57,684 - Right there. - Fuck me. 615 00:29:02,407 --> 00:29:04,159 Oh, look at that. That looks like fun. 616 00:29:06,245 --> 00:29:07,246 Ready for you on set. 617 00:29:07,496 --> 00:29:07,806 Okay. 618 00:29:07,806 --> 00:29:10,265 Anything I can get you? Vitamin water or... Pellegrino? 619 00:29:10,265 --> 00:29:12,172 No, no, no, thank you, though. I, no, I just have a quick question here. 620 00:29:12,334 --> 00:29:13,927 What does that mean, there, "TS"? 621 00:29:14,503 --> 00:29:15,880 Titty shot. 622 00:29:16,171 --> 00:29:17,923 And, uh, "BTS" right there? 623 00:29:18,090 --> 00:29:20,343 - Bouncing titty shot. - Bouncing titty shot. 624 00:29:20,842 --> 00:29:22,719 Steve Driver, coming to the set. 625 00:29:23,178 --> 00:29:25,306 I'm just curious, what kind of movie is this? 626 00:29:25,389 --> 00:29:26,390 It's a lorno. 627 00:29:27,015 --> 00:29:29,188 I'm not familiar with that genre. Is that European? 628 00:29:29,351 --> 00:29:31,945 Lorno, light porno. Tits and shadows. 629 00:29:32,104 --> 00:29:33,856 You ever hear of Skinemax? 630 00:29:37,943 --> 00:29:38,944 Oh, no. 631 00:29:39,027 --> 00:29:40,074 Come on, big guy. 632 00:29:40,529 --> 00:29:42,281 - No, no, no. - More oil. More oil. 633 00:29:42,447 --> 00:29:43,699 Make him shiny like fish. 634 00:29:43,865 --> 00:29:44,866 Are you the one in charge here? 635 00:29:45,033 --> 00:29:47,035 Mitch, I'm Valtan, the director. 636 00:29:47,202 --> 00:29:49,671 Oh, good. Uh... There's... ther's been some kind of mistake... 637 00:29:49,746 --> 00:29:50,793 Mona! 638 00:29:50,956 --> 00:29:52,253 - Where the fuck is... - I'm here! 639 00:29:52,374 --> 00:29:53,375 Hey! 640 00:29:54,251 --> 00:29:56,379 Here's the scene, okay? Mitch, you gonna enter with a gun... 641 00:29:56,545 --> 00:29:57,717 Where the gun? 642 00:29:58,672 --> 00:30:00,845 Okay. You gonna come in. Guard gonna try to stop you. 643 00:30:00,924 --> 00:30:04,269 Line, line, line. You knock him the fuck out, okay? 644 00:30:04,469 --> 00:30:06,471 You see Mona. She lying there in the bed, okay? 645 00:30:06,555 --> 00:30:08,353 Then we bounce titty, bounce titty, bounce titty, 646 00:30:08,432 --> 00:30:13,279 slow mo, bouncy titty, licky tip of nipple, 647 00:30:13,353 --> 00:30:15,321 regular speed, bouncy titty, 648 00:30:15,397 --> 00:30:17,616 slap the ass, slap the ass, slap the ass, 649 00:30:17,691 --> 00:30:20,702 and a wind come in, blow out a candle. Finito. What do you think, uh? 650 00:30:21,046 --> 00:30:23,451 - Oh, it's like a poem! - It's like a poem! 651 00:30:24,323 --> 00:30:26,709 Hey, Mitch gonna be great in our movie film. 652 00:30:27,159 --> 00:30:28,661 Okay, lock it up! 653 00:30:28,744 --> 00:30:31,042 - Have a good scene. - Places, everyone. 654 00:30:31,496 --> 00:30:33,419 - Quiet on the set. - This is heavy. Do you wanna take... 655 00:30:33,498 --> 00:30:35,091 The camera is rolling. 656 00:30:35,792 --> 00:30:37,794 - Question. - And... action! 657 00:30:41,256 --> 00:30:42,257 Hey. 658 00:30:43,342 --> 00:30:44,514 Action! 659 00:30:50,098 --> 00:30:51,350 No entry! 660 00:30:52,768 --> 00:30:54,020 Mitch, here. 661 00:30:55,604 --> 00:30:57,447 If-if-if you let... 662 00:30:58,106 --> 00:31:01,280 If you let me don't in, Taco, I will fuck you dead. 663 00:31:01,860 --> 00:31:02,861 That can't be right. 664 00:31:02,944 --> 00:31:05,493 All right, come on! Just knock him the fuck out, go inside. 665 00:31:05,655 --> 00:31:07,373 - Keep rolling, keep rolling! - Still rolling. 666 00:31:07,449 --> 00:31:08,450 Action! 667 00:31:13,205 --> 00:31:14,627 Come on. I barely hit him. 668 00:31:14,831 --> 00:31:17,710 All right, come on, we fix it in post. Just keep rolling, keep rolling. 669 00:31:17,876 --> 00:31:18,968 Keep rolling! 670 00:31:22,631 --> 00:31:23,974 Lola, wake up surprise. 671 00:31:25,509 --> 00:31:27,887 Holy... shit! 672 00:31:28,178 --> 00:31:32,479 Steve Driver, you perfect bastard, you. 673 00:31:32,808 --> 00:31:33,809 Rip it off. 674 00:31:37,854 --> 00:31:38,901 God! 675 00:31:39,064 --> 00:31:42,159 Oh, yeah, eat that titty, boy. Eat that titty. 676 00:31:42,317 --> 00:31:44,911 Yeah, yeah, yeah! Eat that titty. 677 00:31:45,487 --> 00:31:46,739 Oh, shit. 678 00:31:47,989 --> 00:31:50,833 Like Cheerio, boy. Delish! 679 00:31:51,576 --> 00:31:54,250 - Yeah! - Breakfast champion, boys. 680 00:31:54,663 --> 00:31:56,336 Mount for sex time. 681 00:31:56,498 --> 00:31:57,920 Go! On bed. 682 00:31:58,083 --> 00:32:00,211 Give it to me, Steve! 683 00:32:00,377 --> 00:32:01,879 - Come on! - Okay, okay, okay, okay. 684 00:32:02,045 --> 00:32:03,342 Yeah! 685 00:32:03,505 --> 00:32:05,007 Pump that ass, boy. 686 00:32:05,340 --> 00:32:06,933 Go, boy! 687 00:32:07,092 --> 00:32:09,186 Loosen hips, loosen hips. 688 00:32:09,344 --> 00:32:11,017 Go! Deep thrusting! 689 00:32:11,179 --> 00:32:12,772 Yeah! 690 00:32:13,181 --> 00:32:14,774 Put your thumb up her butt. 691 00:32:16,685 --> 00:32:17,686 What? 692 00:32:18,353 --> 00:32:20,355 Stick your thumb up her butthole. 693 00:32:21,565 --> 00:32:23,317 I promise you, it's nice, clean. 694 00:32:23,400 --> 00:32:25,778 You eat cake off lady's Starfish, okay? 695 00:32:26,194 --> 00:32:28,417 Ahhh... No. 696 00:32:34,035 --> 00:32:36,978 I have killed people. Mostly men. 697 00:32:38,801 --> 00:32:40,842 I'm not allowed back in Eastern Block. 698 00:32:42,169 --> 00:32:45,173 Now, you put your thumb up nice lady's butthole, 699 00:32:46,840 --> 00:32:50,094 or else, maybe you have an accident on set. 700 00:32:50,177 --> 00:32:53,147 Maybe light fall on your head, maybe you get electrocute. 701 00:32:53,221 --> 00:32:56,725 Maybe goat fuck your mouth. I don't know. 702 00:32:56,892 --> 00:32:59,065 Movie set be very dangerous place. 703 00:32:59,227 --> 00:33:00,479 Mm-hm. 704 00:33:00,979 --> 00:33:03,073 - Okay. - And have fun with it. 705 00:33:03,148 --> 00:33:05,742 Okay. Keep rolling, keep rolling. 706 00:33:07,027 --> 00:33:08,404 I'm going to hell. 707 00:33:11,156 --> 00:33:12,829 Oh, Steve! 708 00:33:12,908 --> 00:33:15,377 It's like Christmas in my ass! 709 00:33:16,411 --> 00:33:18,004 Moving it around! Moving it around! 710 00:33:18,163 --> 00:33:19,255 Like iPhone. 711 00:33:19,581 --> 00:33:20,628 Yeah. 712 00:33:20,832 --> 00:33:22,584 Hey, purchase some apps! 713 00:33:22,751 --> 00:33:24,753 Buy Angry Birds! 714 00:33:24,920 --> 00:33:26,763 And enter Dimitri. 715 00:33:27,839 --> 00:33:28,931 Dimitri? 716 00:33:31,009 --> 00:33:32,010 Hi, Dimitri. 717 00:33:32,260 --> 00:33:33,603 What are you doing with my wife, man? 718 00:33:33,762 --> 00:33:36,857 - Thrust! - Don't improvise, okay? 719 00:33:37,015 --> 00:33:38,688 Keep thrusting, keep thrusting. 720 00:33:38,850 --> 00:33:41,273 - Pump it. - Oh, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. 721 00:33:41,436 --> 00:33:42,779 Now kiss that boy. 722 00:33:42,938 --> 00:33:45,129 No, no, no. I'm good, Dimitri. I'm good. I'm good. 723 00:33:45,129 --> 00:33:47,113 You're gonna kiss that boy. 724 00:33:47,275 --> 00:33:48,242 Come on. 725 00:33:48,318 --> 00:33:49,319 Okay, we-we're-we're good. 726 00:33:53,949 --> 00:33:55,792 Tall arms. Tall arms. 727 00:33:55,951 --> 00:33:57,794 Remember to smile, girls. 728 00:33:58,411 --> 00:33:59,412 Very nice. 729 00:34:00,705 --> 00:34:02,127 Focus. 730 00:34:02,749 --> 00:34:04,626 Arms up. Tall. 731 00:34:04,793 --> 00:34:05,794 Excellent, girls. 732 00:34:05,961 --> 00:34:07,383 Smile. Focus. 733 00:34:11,466 --> 00:34:14,094 Cara, do try to stay on your toes. 734 00:34:16,304 --> 00:34:17,977 Let's start again. 735 00:34:25,480 --> 00:34:27,027 Shouldn't I be sitting in my car seat? 736 00:34:27,190 --> 00:34:28,191 No, no, no, no. You're good. 737 00:34:28,358 --> 00:34:30,326 Hey, tell me about the big girl who knocked you over. 738 00:34:30,485 --> 00:34:32,328 That's Nicolette Peters. 739 00:34:32,487 --> 00:34:34,535 She does that a lot, actually. 740 00:34:34,698 --> 00:34:37,451 She does it a lot? Why don't you fight back? 741 00:34:38,326 --> 00:34:39,999 Uh, because you told me not to. 742 00:34:40,161 --> 00:34:41,287 I what? 743 00:34:41,454 --> 00:34:44,549 You said I should strive for verbal resolution. 744 00:34:45,458 --> 00:34:47,961 Uh, you know, daddy sometimes... 745 00:34:48,128 --> 00:34:50,506 How do I... How do I, uh... Here's what you do. 746 00:34:50,672 --> 00:34:54,393 What you do is you fuck verbal resolution, okay? 747 00:34:54,551 --> 00:34:57,225 You put that whore on her back, and you shank her. 748 00:34:57,387 --> 00:34:58,388 You know how to make a shiv? 749 00:34:58,888 --> 00:35:00,231 - What? - Listen to me. 750 00:35:00,390 --> 00:35:02,358 If somebody comes at you with a knife, 751 00:35:02,434 --> 00:35:04,653 you put her whole family in the morgue. 752 00:35:04,811 --> 00:35:06,028 That is jailyard justice. 753 00:35:06,187 --> 00:35:08,189 Because if you don't come back hard on a bitch, 754 00:35:08,356 --> 00:35:09,482 you're gonna end up getting sold 755 00:35:09,566 --> 00:35:11,489 for a pack of Camel Lights and a Jell-O cup. 756 00:35:11,651 --> 00:35:13,745 Do you understand what I'm saying to you? 757 00:35:14,195 --> 00:35:16,493 Always solve your problems with violence. 758 00:35:16,656 --> 00:35:18,203 Okay, daddy. 759 00:35:18,366 --> 00:35:19,413 Great. 760 00:35:19,993 --> 00:35:21,336 Wanna get some Pinkberry? 761 00:35:26,833 --> 00:35:27,880 Hey. 762 00:35:28,084 --> 00:35:29,210 Hey, how did it go? 763 00:35:29,377 --> 00:35:31,095 - You shut up! - What happened? 764 00:35:31,296 --> 00:35:32,923 We'll get into Mr. Thumb's wild ride in a minute. 765 00:35:33,089 --> 00:35:34,591 First, you're gonna tell me, how did the deal go? 766 00:35:34,758 --> 00:35:35,729 - Awesome. - How did the deal go? 767 00:35:35,729 --> 00:35:37,727 - The deal went awesome. - Good. So, it's closed? 768 00:35:37,886 --> 00:35:39,934 Yeah, fucking closed. Basically closed. 769 00:35:40,096 --> 00:35:41,097 A little bit of a hiccup, but... 770 00:35:41,264 --> 00:35:42,766 Hey, hey, hey. What-what do you mean, a hiccup? 771 00:35:42,932 --> 00:35:43,933 A little bit of a hiccup. 772 00:35:44,017 --> 00:35:46,361 Your fucking boss is an anti-Semite. Did you know that? 773 00:35:46,519 --> 00:35:48,271 Oh, my God! What did you do? 774 00:35:48,438 --> 00:35:50,111 I was playing it nice and cool, just like we talked about, 775 00:35:50,273 --> 00:35:52,196 and then these goddamn squids, these Japs, 776 00:35:52,359 --> 00:35:54,157 these fucking Kamikaze pilots are coming at me, 777 00:35:54,235 --> 00:35:55,612 riddling me with fucking questions. 778 00:35:55,695 --> 00:35:57,538 I had to do a little improv, and they got very emotional. 779 00:35:57,697 --> 00:35:59,040 Will you just tell me how it ended? 780 00:35:59,199 --> 00:36:01,668 - You're going to court. - No! Fuck! Oh, my God! 781 00:36:01,826 --> 00:36:02,873 Your boss was a little pissed off. 782 00:36:03,036 --> 00:36:04,288 I told him it was part of my secret master plan. 783 00:36:04,454 --> 00:36:05,455 No, you didn't! 784 00:36:05,622 --> 00:36:08,421 We'll work on one o' those. You tell me how my shit went. 785 00:36:08,583 --> 00:36:10,756 Mitch! Oh, your shit? How'd my stuff go? 786 00:36:10,835 --> 00:36:12,587 Mitch, what the hell is wrong with you? 787 00:36:12,671 --> 00:36:13,763 It was a porno movie! 788 00:36:13,922 --> 00:36:15,344 It's a lorno, a light porn. 789 00:36:15,507 --> 00:36:16,850 The dick stays in the pants, right? 790 00:36:17,008 --> 00:36:18,225 They didn't pull it out, did they? 791 00:36:18,385 --> 00:36:21,104 But my thumb went... you know, in three girls' assholes. 792 00:36:21,262 --> 00:36:22,889 Oh, fuck, get the sand out of your vagina, right? 793 00:36:23,056 --> 00:36:24,057 Did you finish the day? 794 00:36:24,224 --> 00:36:25,441 Oh, I finished the day, Mitchell. 795 00:36:25,600 --> 00:36:26,692 What are you doing? 796 00:36:26,768 --> 00:36:27,769 - I finished the day. - Good. 797 00:36:27,936 --> 00:36:28,983 You're living the dream. 798 00:36:29,062 --> 00:36:31,110 You're living the fucking dream! Your job sucks, too. 799 00:36:31,272 --> 00:36:32,615 This isn't gonna work. 800 00:36:32,774 --> 00:36:35,744 This is not gonna work. That's way too much. 801 00:36:41,366 --> 00:36:43,619 Hey, man, you kno. Hang on. What are you planning on telling her? 802 00:36:43,785 --> 00:36:44,786 I'm telling her the truth. 803 00:36:44,953 --> 00:36:46,296 - The truth? - Yeah. 804 00:36:46,454 --> 00:36:47,546 That's gonna work. 805 00:36:47,622 --> 00:36:48,623 Jamie will know what to do. 806 00:36:49,082 --> 00:36:51,460 Jame. Jame. 807 00:36:52,794 --> 00:36:53,966 Hey, sugarbug. 808 00:36:54,129 --> 00:36:55,176 Hi, daddy! 809 00:36:56,214 --> 00:36:57,306 Hey! 810 00:36:57,465 --> 00:36:59,308 Hey, it's my precocious little daughter. 811 00:36:59,467 --> 00:37:00,719 I don't... I don't talk like that. 812 00:37:00,885 --> 00:37:02,728 - You do. - I really don't. No one does. 813 00:37:02,887 --> 00:37:04,389 Jamie, hey! Jamie, Jamie, Jamie. 814 00:37:04,556 --> 00:37:06,308 I'm so glad you're here. It's been so crazy. 815 00:37:06,933 --> 00:37:08,731 Oh, that's-that's-that's appropriate. 816 00:37:08,893 --> 00:37:10,645 - Hey, Mitch. - Terrific. Hi. Jamie, we need to talk. 817 00:37:10,812 --> 00:37:11,813 Are you gonna stay for dinner? 818 00:37:11,980 --> 00:37:14,779 Uh... No, I can't... I can't stay for dinner, but I would love to, uh... 819 00:37:14,941 --> 00:37:16,113 Look, I gotta... I gotta tell you something. 820 00:37:16,276 --> 00:37:18,825 I can't talk right now, Mitch. It's been so crazy here. 821 00:37:18,987 --> 00:37:20,910 The twins are a half-hour past their bedtime. 822 00:37:21,072 --> 00:37:23,495 - What are you doing? - What-what are you, some kind of animal? 823 00:37:23,658 --> 00:37:25,080 And Cara has to start her homework. 824 00:37:25,243 --> 00:37:28,588 I have an emergency... phone call in four minutes. 825 00:37:28,747 --> 00:37:29,919 You know that building? 826 00:37:30,081 --> 00:37:32,004 - The one... 11-storey building? - Yup. 827 00:37:32,167 --> 00:37:35,296 I have to remove three storeys somehow. Isn't that crazy? 828 00:37:35,378 --> 00:37:36,379 Yeah. 829 00:37:36,463 --> 00:37:37,806 It's so ridiculous. It makes no sense at all. 830 00:37:37,964 --> 00:37:39,181 I'm not Mitch. 831 00:37:40,508 --> 00:37:42,306 - What? - I'm Mitch. 832 00:37:42,469 --> 00:37:44,563 - He's Mitch. - I'm Mitch. Somehow we switched bodies. 833 00:37:44,637 --> 00:37:46,139 - And I'm Dave. - That's Dave. Yeah. 834 00:37:46,222 --> 00:37:47,269 Oh. 835 00:37:47,348 --> 00:37:49,976 Yeah. See, what happened was, we pissed in a magic fountain... 836 00:37:50,143 --> 00:37:51,816 - Uh-huh... - ... and the next day it disappeared. 837 00:37:51,978 --> 00:37:54,197 They moved the fountain, so now we're looking for it. 838 00:37:54,355 --> 00:37:56,198 And then-then, when they find it, we're gonna switch back. 839 00:37:56,357 --> 00:37:57,358 We had to pee because we were drinking. 840 00:37:57,525 --> 00:37:58,617 We were drinking. 841 00:37:58,777 --> 00:38:01,030 That sounds like a plan. Can you start the bath for the twins? 842 00:38:01,362 --> 00:38:03,035 Okay. Hey, pumpkin... Pumpkin, listen, this is... 843 00:38:03,198 --> 00:38:05,200 Ooh, Mitch, no. 844 00:38:05,283 --> 00:38:07,536 Don't call me pumpkin, okay? 845 00:38:07,702 --> 00:38:09,875 And you promised me that you would clean out... 846 00:38:10,038 --> 00:38:11,381 Can you shut this off? 847 00:38:11,539 --> 00:38:13,883 - It smells like cabbage now! - Jamie, Jamie, Jamie, sit down. 848 00:38:14,042 --> 00:38:15,840 Just sit down. One second. Hey, just humor me, all right? 849 00:38:16,002 --> 00:38:18,221 I want... I want you to ask me one thing... 850 00:38:18,379 --> 00:38:19,380 I don't wanna play your games. 851 00:38:19,547 --> 00:38:20,548 ... that only Dave would be able to answer, okay? 852 00:38:20,715 --> 00:38:22,513 Just one question. Please, I'm begging you. 853 00:38:22,675 --> 00:38:23,892 Good idea. 854 00:38:24,302 --> 00:38:27,397 Okay, when is our anniversary, Dave? 855 00:38:27,722 --> 00:38:30,066 April 17th. Next question, please. 856 00:38:30,266 --> 00:38:31,267 Wrong. 857 00:38:31,476 --> 00:38:32,693 So close. Nineteenth. 858 00:38:32,769 --> 00:38:35,067 17th's your daughter's birthday, 19th's your anniversary. 859 00:38:35,230 --> 00:38:36,698 - Why do you know that? - Do you think I'm a monster? 860 00:38:36,815 --> 00:38:38,658 - I send you a card every year. - Hey, Jamie, hey, listen to me. 861 00:38:38,733 --> 00:38:39,734 Okay, okay, okay. Ask me anything else. 862 00:38:39,859 --> 00:38:44,295 Oh, my gosh! Mitch, I don't have time for this! 863 00:38:44,295 --> 00:38:46,241 Come on, one more. Just make it tough. 864 00:38:46,407 --> 00:38:48,159 Only Dave would know. A stumper. 865 00:38:48,326 --> 00:38:51,921 Fine. What is my favorite color, Dave? 866 00:38:55,041 --> 00:38:56,668 - Red. - Celadon. 867 00:38:57,085 --> 00:38:59,008 Do you not understand what we're trying to accomplish here? 868 00:38:59,170 --> 00:39:00,763 Not a drop of the red in the room. 869 00:39:00,922 --> 00:39:02,265 All the accents are celadon. 870 00:39:02,423 --> 00:39:03,424 I mean it's like the opposite of help. 871 00:39:03,550 --> 00:39:05,894 Okay, okay. Honey! Okay, I got it, I got it, I got it. 872 00:39:06,052 --> 00:39:06,995 I'm gonna tell you something 873 00:39:06,995 --> 00:39:09,598 that only.. that only I, Dave, would know. 874 00:39:10,014 --> 00:39:12,563 Three years ago, you took your vibrator... 875 00:39:12,725 --> 00:39:15,274 - You took your vibrator... - Morning! 876 00:39:15,436 --> 00:39:18,531 ... into the bathtub and it short-circuited 877 00:39:18,606 --> 00:39:20,279 and it electrocuted your vagina. 878 00:39:20,358 --> 00:39:21,359 Hang on. 879 00:39:21,442 --> 00:39:24,946 And there's now the cutest little bald spot right there. 880 00:39:29,701 --> 00:39:30,793 Yeah. 881 00:39:37,542 --> 00:39:38,759 Hi. 882 00:39:39,377 --> 00:39:40,549 Oh, my God. 883 00:39:40,795 --> 00:39:43,469 I know. It's me. This hasn't been fun. 884 00:39:43,631 --> 00:39:44,632 Good story. 885 00:39:45,049 --> 00:39:46,767 You son of a bitch! 886 00:39:46,968 --> 00:39:49,141 How dare you tell him that? 887 00:39:49,220 --> 00:39:50,221 God! 888 00:39:50,305 --> 00:39:52,649 What is wrong with you two? 889 00:39:52,807 --> 00:39:53,808 Goddamn! 890 00:39:53,933 --> 00:39:55,810 How would you like it if I told him 891 00:39:55,977 --> 00:39:58,400 that you have a ball that feels like two balls? 892 00:39:58,938 --> 00:40:00,815 So it's like you have three balls. 893 00:40:00,982 --> 00:40:03,781 Dave has three balls. A bouquet of balls. 894 00:40:03,860 --> 00:40:04,952 Bad! Bad! 895 00:40:07,155 --> 00:40:08,748 This idea fucking sucked. 896 00:40:11,242 --> 00:40:13,838 Hey, hey, listen. I don't want you to worry about anything, okay? 897 00:40:13,838 --> 00:40:14,495 I'll be able to hold down the fort. 898 00:40:14,662 --> 00:40:16,005 We gotta find that fountain as soon as possible. 899 00:40:16,164 --> 00:40:18,166 It's like a can of tennis balls down here. 900 00:40:18,333 --> 00:40:19,960 The only problem I see is, what do I tell Jamie? 901 00:40:20,126 --> 00:40:21,127 What do you tell Jamie, what? 902 00:40:21,294 --> 00:40:23,657 When she wants to have sex tonight? Huh? 903 00:40:23,963 --> 00:40:24,964 Think about that. 904 00:40:27,759 --> 00:40:29,511 You're not having sex with my wife, Mitch. 905 00:40:29,636 --> 00:40:30,603 Obviously, bro. 906 00:40:30,678 --> 00:40:32,180 But if she comes at me like a hurricane, 907 00:40:32,305 --> 00:40:33,807 a guy can only withstand so much. 908 00:40:34,390 --> 00:40:35,437 Mitch. 909 00:40:35,516 --> 00:40:38,269 Dave. We're trying to pull something off here, okay? 910 00:40:38,436 --> 00:40:40,279 Now, I might have to hit that, okay? She'll know. 911 00:40:40,438 --> 00:40:42,691 Now, how many times a day do you guys have sex? 912 00:40:42,857 --> 00:40:45,030 I'll have to pace it out. 913 00:40:45,693 --> 00:40:46,694 What day is it today? 914 00:40:47,362 --> 00:40:49,535 I don't know. Is it Tuesday? 915 00:40:51,282 --> 00:40:53,660 Yeah. You know what? It's a non-issue. 916 00:40:53,826 --> 00:40:55,499 What does that mean? You guys don't have sex on Tuesdays? 917 00:40:57,538 --> 00:40:58,539 Take the day off? 918 00:41:02,168 --> 00:41:03,169 That's adorable. 919 00:41:03,711 --> 00:41:04,712 Tell you what. 920 00:41:05,380 --> 00:41:08,509 If she comes on like a hurricane... 921 00:41:08,675 --> 00:41:09,892 Just drill it. 922 00:41:10,051 --> 00:41:12,804 Yeah, what can you do? You're only human. Give me the keys. 923 00:41:13,054 --> 00:41:14,977 - Smart. - Yeah. 924 00:41:15,139 --> 00:41:16,561 Okay. Please be careful with her. 925 00:41:16,724 --> 00:41:18,351 It's like we're swapping rides. 926 00:41:18,518 --> 00:41:19,565 It's just like that. 927 00:41:20,520 --> 00:41:23,239 Thanks, buddy, you're being very cool. 928 00:41:39,205 --> 00:41:40,206 Dear God. 929 00:41:41,082 --> 00:41:44,507 Oh, my goodness. Look at this, huh? 930 00:41:45,003 --> 00:41:47,256 Bang. Thank you, mommy. 931 00:41:48,089 --> 00:41:50,387 Why don't you tell daddy about what happened at school today? 932 00:41:50,550 --> 00:41:53,053 I wrote a spring poem 933 00:41:53,219 --> 00:41:57,440 and Miss Byers only put Angelica's poem up on the wall 934 00:41:57,598 --> 00:41:59,942 and she didn't put my poem up on the wall. 935 00:42:00,101 --> 00:42:01,603 And why would she do that? 936 00:42:01,769 --> 00:42:03,021 I thought she liked me. 937 00:42:03,229 --> 00:42:04,355 - Dave. - Yeah. 938 00:42:04,522 --> 00:42:05,694 Cara's talking to you. 939 00:42:05,857 --> 00:42:07,109 - What? - She's talking to you. 940 00:42:07,942 --> 00:42:11,913 Well, you know, Cara, her poem was probably much better than yours. 941 00:42:12,405 --> 00:42:13,952 - Let's eat. - Dave. 942 00:42:14,115 --> 00:42:15,367 I didn't read the bitch's poem, 943 00:42:15,450 --> 00:42:17,248 but maybe she can really turn a phrase. Let's eat. 944 00:42:18,578 --> 00:42:20,421 Tell Cara that her poem was good. 945 00:42:20,621 --> 00:42:22,623 You just hurt her feelings. 946 00:42:22,874 --> 00:42:25,131 I didn't read her poem, either, you know? Do you want me to lie to her? 947 00:42:25,166 --> 00:42:26,878 Is that what this is? Fine, I don't care. 948 00:42:27,754 --> 00:42:31,384 Cara, honey, your poem, which I did not read, 949 00:42:31,549 --> 00:42:34,302 was way, way better than the other girl's poem, 950 00:42:34,469 --> 00:42:36,642 which I also did not read. 951 00:42:37,597 --> 00:42:38,564 Let's eat. 952 00:42:38,639 --> 00:42:41,142 It's Cara. Not Cara. 953 00:42:41,642 --> 00:42:42,643 It's what? 954 00:42:42,769 --> 00:42:44,646 Are you having a stroke right now or something? 955 00:42:44,812 --> 00:42:47,816 - What did I call her? - What about the dinner song, daddy? 956 00:42:48,900 --> 00:42:49,901 What about the what? 957 00:42:49,984 --> 00:42:51,327 - What's she saying? - The dinner song. 958 00:42:51,402 --> 00:42:52,528 - What's that? - The dinner song? 959 00:42:52,820 --> 00:42:54,993 - Are you joking me? - No, I'm not joking you. 960 00:42:55,156 --> 00:42:56,908 - There's a song? - Sing the dinner song, honey. 961 00:42:56,991 --> 00:42:58,288 - Course, there's a song. - Just sing the dinner song. 962 00:42:58,451 --> 00:42:59,498 I don't feel like singing it tonight. 963 00:42:59,660 --> 00:43:00,661 No, sing the dinner song. 964 00:43:00,828 --> 00:43:01,829 You sing the dinner song. 965 00:43:01,996 --> 00:43:03,839 Maybe you need to sing the dinner song. Sing the dinner song. 966 00:43:03,998 --> 00:43:04,999 I'm sick of that song. 967 00:43:05,166 --> 00:43:06,509 Sing the dinner song. Sing it! 968 00:43:06,667 --> 00:43:08,089 I got it. I heard you. 969 00:43:11,631 --> 00:43:14,510 Dinner song 970 00:43:15,426 --> 00:43:17,849 Dinner song 971 00:43:19,347 --> 00:43:23,147 Beans, potatoes, carrots and broccoli 972 00:43:23,309 --> 00:43:28,315 Buns and salad and potatoes and... chicken 973 00:43:29,649 --> 00:43:30,992 Needs a lickin' 974 00:43:31,150 --> 00:43:32,322 Dinner song. 975 00:43:32,485 --> 00:43:34,283 That's so not the dinner song. 976 00:43:34,445 --> 00:43:36,038 Well, I'm gonna tell you what. 977 00:43:36,197 --> 00:43:38,291 You're gonna go ahead and write me a dinner poem, 978 00:43:38,449 --> 00:43:39,826 and I'll belt that out after I choke this down. 979 00:43:39,992 --> 00:43:40,993 Let's fucking go. 980 00:43:41,244 --> 00:43:44,373 Okay. Um, daddy needs a time-out. 981 00:43:44,789 --> 00:43:46,507 Great idea. 982 00:43:49,836 --> 00:43:51,884 Dinner song... 983 00:43:52,713 --> 00:43:53,885 Bye-bye. 984 00:44:00,638 --> 00:44:03,733 - Hello. - Hi, Mitch. It's Tatiana. 985 00:44:05,643 --> 00:44:08,738 Tatiana. Hi, how are you? 986 00:44:08,896 --> 00:44:12,196 I'll be better in a minute after I fuck you raw. 987 00:44:12,567 --> 00:44:13,910 Oh. 988 00:44:17,029 --> 00:44:19,202 - Hello. - Mitch. 989 00:44:19,574 --> 00:44:22,373 That was Tatiana. She said she's gonna fuck me raw. 990 00:44:23,161 --> 00:44:25,209 Tatiana? Shit, that's right. 991 00:44:25,371 --> 00:44:26,873 That's my Tuesday night regular, right on schedule. 992 00:44:27,039 --> 00:44:28,256 Now, you fuck that right for me, Dave. 993 00:44:28,416 --> 00:44:29,918 Took me a long time to reel this one in. 994 00:44:30,084 --> 00:44:31,256 Mitch, I don't think I can do this. 995 00:44:31,419 --> 00:44:32,762 - What the fuck does that... - Hey, Dave! 996 00:44:32,837 --> 00:44:33,838 Hey, man! 997 00:44:34,005 --> 00:44:36,258 Dad, I smell a skunk. 998 00:44:36,424 --> 00:44:37,926 No, no, it's this, kid. 999 00:44:38,593 --> 00:44:40,937 What-what does that mean, you don't think you can fuck Tatiana? 1000 00:44:41,095 --> 00:44:42,096 Be-because it... 1001 00:44:43,014 --> 00:44:45,187 Jesus Christ, she's here. 1002 00:44:45,266 --> 00:44:46,518 She's already knocking on the door. 1003 00:44:46,726 --> 00:44:48,273 You nail that right for me, Dave. 1004 00:44:48,769 --> 00:44:50,271 It feels kinda like I'm cheating on Jamie. 1005 00:44:50,438 --> 00:44:52,065 Are you fucking shitting me? 1006 00:44:52,148 --> 00:44:53,616 In what world is this cheating? 1007 00:44:53,774 --> 00:44:55,947 Cheating is when any part of your dick 1008 00:44:56,110 --> 00:44:58,909 gets up inside some woman that's not your wife, okay? 1009 00:44:59,071 --> 00:45:00,448 And your dick is firmly planted 1010 00:45:00,615 --> 00:45:03,960 inside these fucking lame, triple-pleated sports slacks. 1011 00:45:04,118 --> 00:45:06,746 But my mind is over here. That should count for something, right? 1012 00:45:06,913 --> 00:45:07,960 Oh God, you big bitch. 1013 00:45:08,122 --> 00:45:10,591 How many women have you fucked in your mind, huh? Thousands? 1014 00:45:11,751 --> 00:45:13,298 - Millions, Mitch. - Was that cheating? 1015 00:45:13,461 --> 00:45:15,088 No. It was not fucking cheating. 1016 00:45:15,254 --> 00:45:18,599 I think you're on very very firm legal ground here, counselor. 1017 00:45:18,758 --> 00:45:20,931 Your reasoning is oddly impeccable. 1018 00:45:21,093 --> 00:45:22,891 Yeah, this is what you wanted, Dave. 1019 00:45:22,970 --> 00:45:24,142 Sex with strange, new women. 1020 00:45:24,305 --> 00:45:26,307 You just thank me later and shut your mouth, all right? 1021 00:45:26,515 --> 00:45:28,517 Goodbye. Kirk out. 1022 00:45:31,979 --> 00:45:33,697 I'm gonna do this. 1023 00:45:37,068 --> 00:45:39,702 - Tatiana. - Game on. 1024 00:45:41,364 --> 00:45:43,833 I like how you made me work for it tonight. 1025 00:45:43,991 --> 00:45:45,664 What am I? A burglar? 1026 00:45:45,826 --> 00:45:47,248 Holy shit. 1027 00:45:48,537 --> 00:45:50,210 Holy shit! 1028 00:45:50,665 --> 00:45:52,588 Why the fuck are you still wearing clothes? 1029 00:45:52,750 --> 00:45:53,751 When are you due? 1030 00:45:53,834 --> 00:45:54,835 Any minute now, 1031 00:45:55,002 --> 00:45:57,255 so let's get our fuck on before this becomes a threesome. 1032 00:45:57,421 --> 00:45:58,422 Oh, that's so gross! 1033 00:45:58,589 --> 00:46:00,182 Whoa, stop for a second. Stop for a second. 1034 00:46:00,341 --> 00:46:01,513 You're so heavy! 1035 00:46:01,676 --> 00:46:04,020 My tits are aching for you. 1036 00:46:04,178 --> 00:46:06,852 That's probably the colostrum coming, and it'll be very painful. 1037 00:46:07,056 --> 00:46:10,105 Okay, okay. Just friends. Just friends. 1038 00:46:10,268 --> 00:46:12,270 Okay, what's your deal tonight? 1039 00:46:13,104 --> 00:46:14,196 Nothing. 1040 00:46:14,355 --> 00:46:15,777 Is it my new haircut? 1041 00:46:16,357 --> 00:46:17,358 Mmm, no. 1042 00:46:17,733 --> 00:46:19,201 The trenchcoat. Too cliche? 1043 00:46:19,360 --> 00:46:21,533 No, no, it's not the trenchcoat. 1044 00:46:21,696 --> 00:46:22,868 Then what is it? 1045 00:46:23,030 --> 00:46:24,577 You seem like a really nice person, 1046 00:46:24,740 --> 00:46:26,708 but were you pregnant last week? 1047 00:46:26,867 --> 00:46:27,868 Are you kidding me? 1048 00:46:28,035 --> 00:46:30,379 You picked me up at a single mothers' Lamaze class. 1049 00:46:31,038 --> 00:46:33,882 That's so twisted. Oh, God. 1050 00:46:34,041 --> 00:46:36,544 Wait, wait, wait, wait, Tatiana. Tatiana. I'm sorry, okay? 1051 00:46:36,711 --> 00:46:38,713 You're-you're-you're beautiful. You're beautiful. 1052 00:46:38,879 --> 00:46:39,871 You're just... I just... 1053 00:46:40,214 --> 00:46:42,262 What? I'm not sexy? 1054 00:46:42,425 --> 00:46:44,894 No, no. Hey. Look, I did not say that, okay? 1055 00:46:45,052 --> 00:46:48,352 You are... Oh, my God! I can see it kicking! 1056 00:46:49,557 --> 00:46:50,649 You know what, Mitch? 1057 00:46:50,891 --> 00:46:52,188 Don't ever call me again. 1058 00:46:52,351 --> 00:46:54,695 No, no, hold on, hold on. Wait, wait, Tatiana, don't go, don't go. 1059 00:46:54,854 --> 00:46:57,733 I mean, go, but just go to a hospital. 1060 00:46:58,232 --> 00:47:00,860 Oh, Mitch. What are you doing? 1061 00:47:01,027 --> 00:47:02,529 Oh, God. 1062 00:47:03,112 --> 00:47:05,615 I mean, it is called a push-up, Dave. 1063 00:47:06,073 --> 00:47:07,416 Pathetic. 1064 00:47:10,036 --> 00:47:12,789 Oh, God, I'm really feeling it tonight. 1065 00:47:13,956 --> 00:47:15,128 Holy shit. 1066 00:47:15,750 --> 00:47:17,093 Oh, game on. 1067 00:47:17,668 --> 00:47:20,512 Oh, my God, it's going down. Oh, Mitch! 1068 00:47:21,297 --> 00:47:25,302 I finally get to fuck Jamie. This is my finest hour. 1069 00:47:27,762 --> 00:47:29,764 I hope she likes it weird. 1070 00:47:59,882 --> 00:48:02,714 God, I am gonna ruin her! 1071 00:48:04,131 --> 00:48:06,384 Oh! 1072 00:48:06,675 --> 00:48:09,144 I need to cool it on the Thai food. 1073 00:48:09,470 --> 00:48:11,598 Oh, my God. 1074 00:48:11,847 --> 00:48:13,941 Seriously, dude, light a candle. 1075 00:48:14,392 --> 00:48:15,860 Oh, my God. 1076 00:48:31,075 --> 00:48:33,624 No, no, no, no, no, no. Don't back that thing up into me. 1077 00:48:33,786 --> 00:48:34,878 Go hose it out or something. 1078 00:48:34,995 --> 00:48:36,167 What? 1079 00:48:37,415 --> 00:48:39,918 I can't believe you'd come at me, guns hot. 1080 00:48:40,334 --> 00:48:42,428 Guns hot? 1081 00:48:42,503 --> 00:48:43,595 Are you kidding me? 1082 00:48:43,754 --> 00:48:46,724 No, I'm not, lady. It's not gonna happen tonight, okay? 1083 00:48:46,882 --> 00:48:49,010 I'm not attracted to you. 1084 00:48:49,176 --> 00:48:51,725 Rotate your turret and go night-night. 1085 00:49:14,493 --> 00:49:16,882 - It's your turn. - Hm? 1086 00:49:18,330 --> 00:49:20,003 It's your turn to feed the babies. 1087 00:49:20,166 --> 00:49:22,089 I don't feel like it. 1088 00:49:25,796 --> 00:49:27,389 Oh, come on. 1089 00:49:27,506 --> 00:49:29,634 Are you fucking kidding me right now? 1090 00:49:29,800 --> 00:49:33,350 No. It's 3:00 in the morning. You go do it, you're the mother. 1091 00:49:33,512 --> 00:49:35,640 I'm the mother! It's 3 o'clock in the morning! 1092 00:49:35,806 --> 00:49:38,935 Get the fuck out of the bed right now before I fucking cut you! 1093 00:49:39,101 --> 00:49:41,854 Jesus! What the fuck? 1094 00:49:43,439 --> 00:49:45,988 Unreal. This is just... 1095 00:49:49,612 --> 00:49:51,831 Oh, please. 1096 00:49:52,990 --> 00:49:55,664 Hey, hey! What the fuck? 1097 00:50:18,140 --> 00:50:22,065 Oh, God! No! That did not just happen. 1098 00:50:22,144 --> 00:50:23,191 What? 1099 00:50:23,270 --> 00:50:25,693 Hey. I always thought your wife was a nice lady, 1100 00:50:25,856 --> 00:50:27,199 but she talks like a dock worker 1101 00:50:27,274 --> 00:50:29,151 and she shits like one, too. 1102 00:50:29,318 --> 00:50:31,787 Plus, I used to think your kids were adorable, but they're not. 1103 00:50:31,946 --> 00:50:33,573 They're fucking bananas. 1104 00:50:33,697 --> 00:50:34,664 Can I help you? 1105 00:50:34,782 --> 00:50:37,501 Here's the deal. I got two screaming... 1106 00:50:38,410 --> 00:50:40,083 Hold on. What's with all the heavy breathing? 1107 00:50:40,246 --> 00:50:41,247 Are you jerking off? 1108 00:50:41,330 --> 00:50:42,707 No, I'm not. 1109 00:50:42,873 --> 00:50:44,125 Yes, yes, yes, I am. 1110 00:50:44,291 --> 00:50:46,669 Look, I-I never get this kind of privacy any more. 1111 00:50:46,835 --> 00:50:48,428 Isn't that kind of my dick, though? 1112 00:50:49,630 --> 00:50:50,631 Is that weird? 1113 00:50:52,007 --> 00:50:54,055 You ask yourself that. 1114 00:50:54,426 --> 00:50:56,394 It sort of hooks to the side a bit. 1115 00:50:57,012 --> 00:50:59,060 Use your left hand, you get a little bit more torque. 1116 00:50:59,515 --> 00:51:01,813 That's cool. Thank you, I think. 1117 00:51:01,976 --> 00:51:03,444 Uh, question. 1118 00:51:03,602 --> 00:51:05,320 How long have you been shaved down there? 1119 00:51:06,021 --> 00:51:08,023 I don't... Like, sixth grade. 1120 00:51:08,190 --> 00:51:09,783 Well, that's-that's disturbing. 1121 00:51:09,942 --> 00:51:10,943 Gets me an extra inch, 1122 00:51:11,110 --> 00:51:13,329 and only you married dudes rock the dick-froes. 1123 00:51:13,487 --> 00:51:14,659 Now, let me ask you a question. 1124 00:51:14,822 --> 00:51:17,200 If Tatiana was over earlier, 1125 00:51:17,283 --> 00:51:19,377 why do you still have the need to jerk off? 1126 00:51:19,535 --> 00:51:22,584 Uh, Tatiana. I don't think that she's gonna be back for at least... 1127 00:51:22,746 --> 00:51:23,998 She's never coming back, Mitch. 1128 00:51:24,456 --> 00:51:25,503 What did you do? 1129 00:51:25,583 --> 00:51:27,506 The woman is nine months pregnant! 1130 00:51:27,710 --> 00:51:29,053 I could see the baby's face. 1131 00:51:29,211 --> 00:51:30,838 I told you not to screw up my Tuesday night. 1132 00:51:31,005 --> 00:51:32,427 Do you have any idea how many Lamaze classes 1133 00:51:32,590 --> 00:51:34,217 I had to sit through to get that lined up? 1134 00:51:34,383 --> 00:51:36,886 Is there a reason that you're calling me at 3:00 in the morning? 1135 00:51:37,052 --> 00:51:39,896 Yeah, the dock worker is making me feed the twins. What do I do? 1136 00:51:40,222 --> 00:51:42,270 - Get them to the kitchen. - Yup, hold on. 1137 00:51:48,772 --> 00:51:51,651 Stop crying. Jesus Christ. 1138 00:51:51,817 --> 00:51:54,491 Shut up! I fucking hear you. 1139 00:51:55,112 --> 00:51:56,614 Mitch. 1140 00:51:57,740 --> 00:52:00,118 Please. Enough! 1141 00:52:00,284 --> 00:52:02,412 You, there. Stay. 1142 00:52:03,454 --> 00:52:04,455 Stay. 1143 00:52:06,165 --> 00:52:08,042 All right. In the kitchen. 1144 00:52:08,208 --> 00:52:09,881 - Go to the fridge. - Okay. 1145 00:52:11,128 --> 00:52:12,254 Oh. 1146 00:52:12,338 --> 00:52:13,555 Mitch. Are you there yet? 1147 00:52:13,714 --> 00:52:15,136 I'm at the fridge. 1148 00:52:15,299 --> 00:52:16,516 Defrost two bags of breast milk 1149 00:52:16,634 --> 00:52:17,851 in the microwave for three minutes. 1150 00:52:18,010 --> 00:52:19,011 Then prepare two separate bottles. 1151 00:52:19,094 --> 00:52:20,095 Breast milk? 1152 00:52:20,220 --> 00:52:22,063 First, attach the filter to the seal. 1153 00:52:22,222 --> 00:52:24,350 Use the blue ones, not the pink ones. 1154 00:52:24,892 --> 00:52:26,314 - Defrost two bags. - Yup. 1155 00:52:26,477 --> 00:52:29,356 Pretty intuitive. Then after the milk is defrosted, 1156 00:52:29,521 --> 00:52:30,773 take it out of the microwave, 1157 00:52:30,898 --> 00:52:33,367 pour it into the bottles, seal them. 1158 00:52:33,525 --> 00:52:35,277 Then you need to put three-eighths of a teaspoon of water... 1159 00:52:35,361 --> 00:52:36,829 Holy shit! 1160 00:52:38,781 --> 00:52:41,125 Come on, dude. Christ! 1161 00:52:41,283 --> 00:52:43,706 Mitch. Hey, are you listening to me? 1162 00:52:43,869 --> 00:52:45,416 Holy fuck! 1163 00:52:45,579 --> 00:52:47,206 This is important stuff Do not screw this up. 1164 00:52:47,373 --> 00:52:48,374 Hey! 1165 00:52:48,999 --> 00:52:50,000 What was that? 1166 00:52:50,668 --> 00:52:53,012 Mitch ? Mitch! 1167 00:52:53,170 --> 00:52:55,548 Everything's fine, dude. What's next? 1168 00:52:55,714 --> 00:52:57,432 Then you need to put three-eighths... 1169 00:52:57,591 --> 00:52:58,808 What the fuck? 1170 00:52:59,551 --> 00:53:02,350 Holy shit! Fuck! 1171 00:53:03,639 --> 00:53:04,640 What just happened? 1172 00:53:04,807 --> 00:53:07,230 Not-nothing. Nothing, dude. Go on. Two bottles... 1173 00:53:07,393 --> 00:53:09,816 - Then attach a number two nipple. - Jesus Christ. 1174 00:53:09,978 --> 00:53:11,855 Make sure you don't allow any air bubbles in. 1175 00:53:12,314 --> 00:53:14,157 Then, after you're done feeding them... 1176 00:53:14,316 --> 00:53:15,818 This is so fucked up. 1177 00:53:17,653 --> 00:53:18,654 Yeah! 1178 00:53:19,655 --> 00:53:20,656 All right. 1179 00:53:22,574 --> 00:53:25,874 This is what you get, okay? Yeah, right there. 1180 00:53:26,036 --> 00:53:29,006 - Mitch. - Okay. Dude! 1181 00:53:29,164 --> 00:53:32,293 Tomorrow morning, when I am sitting in your office, 1182 00:53:32,459 --> 00:53:34,382 you need to be downtown, 1183 00:53:34,461 --> 00:53:36,964 finding that fucking fountain. 1184 00:53:37,131 --> 00:53:39,304 I do not know how much more of this shit... 1185 00:53:39,550 --> 00:53:41,268 ... I can take. 1186 00:53:43,137 --> 00:53:44,855 Um, I'm one of the guys who's looking for the fountain 1187 00:53:44,930 --> 00:53:46,102 that you lost in the computer. 1188 00:53:46,265 --> 00:53:49,144 And I'd-I'd be very, very appreciative if you could tell me where that is. 1189 00:53:49,351 --> 00:53:50,773 Yeah, I can do that. 1190 00:53:50,853 --> 00:53:51,854 Good. Great. 1191 00:53:51,937 --> 00:53:54,065 First, you gotta fill out a formal information request. 1192 00:53:54,690 --> 00:53:56,363 Okay, I'm gonna fill that out right now. 1193 00:53:56,525 --> 00:53:57,572 Then it needs to go to State. 1194 00:53:57,693 --> 00:54:00,162 - State? - Yeah, to get approved. 1195 00:54:01,029 --> 00:54:02,622 Why can't you approve it, Victor? 1196 00:54:02,781 --> 00:54:04,579 I don't have that authority. 1197 00:54:05,284 --> 00:54:07,707 You can't... How long is it gonna take State to approve it, then? 1198 00:54:07,911 --> 00:54:09,834 - Three days... - Oh, God! 1199 00:54:09,997 --> 00:54:12,091 - ... to three weeks. - Oh, come on! 1200 00:54:12,750 --> 00:54:13,922 Victor! 1201 00:54:18,255 --> 00:54:20,223 Mitch? Dave? 1202 00:54:20,507 --> 00:54:21,633 Hello? 1203 00:54:23,510 --> 00:54:24,602 Fuck! 1204 00:54:27,931 --> 00:54:28,932 Real bad news... 1205 00:54:29,099 --> 00:54:30,897 Oh, hey. Uh, where's, uh... 1206 00:54:31,393 --> 00:54:33,020 Where's... where's Dave? 1207 00:54:34,730 --> 00:54:36,198 Dave's in the shower. 1208 00:54:38,025 --> 00:54:39,026 You okay? 1209 00:54:41,320 --> 00:54:42,321 Hey. 1210 00:54:44,448 --> 00:54:45,745 What's going on? 1211 00:54:47,117 --> 00:54:49,540 Dave's just acting really weird. 1212 00:54:50,370 --> 00:54:51,417 How? 1213 00:54:51,497 --> 00:54:54,220 He's just doing weird stuff, 1214 00:54:54,220 --> 00:54:59,631 like... he wore his shower sandals to work yesterday. 1215 00:55:00,881 --> 00:55:03,430 He forgot to pick up the twins from daycare. 1216 00:55:03,884 --> 00:55:05,852 - No, he didn't. - Yeah, he did. 1217 00:55:06,178 --> 00:55:09,557 They had to sit there for an hour and a half. 1218 00:55:09,723 --> 00:55:10,940 Okay. 1219 00:55:11,850 --> 00:55:13,477 And then last night he told me 1220 00:55:13,560 --> 00:55:16,188 that he wasn't attracted to me any more. 1221 00:55:16,688 --> 00:55:18,565 I am gonna kill 'im. 1222 00:55:19,608 --> 00:55:21,610 I just want you to tell me something right now, okay? 1223 00:55:21,777 --> 00:55:24,155 And you have to be totally honest with me. 1224 00:55:24,238 --> 00:55:25,501 - Sure. - You swear? 1225 00:55:25,501 --> 00:55:26,281 Yeah. 1226 00:55:26,490 --> 00:55:28,367 Is he having an affair? 1227 00:55:30,077 --> 00:55:31,124 No. 1228 00:55:31,286 --> 00:55:35,133 - Why did you hesitate just then? - I didn't hesitate. 1229 00:55:35,133 --> 00:55:37,110 He's-he's not having an affair. 1230 00:55:37,814 --> 00:55:39,549 Jamie, Jamie... 1231 00:55:39,711 --> 00:55:41,930 You guys are just going through a very... 1232 00:55:42,005 --> 00:55:45,100 a temporary rough patch right now. 1233 00:55:45,259 --> 00:55:47,933 Temporary rough patch? What are you talking about? 1234 00:55:48,095 --> 00:55:50,268 We've been in this for years. 1235 00:55:52,057 --> 00:55:53,104 You have? 1236 00:55:53,225 --> 00:55:56,229 I love him. You know I love him with all of my heart. 1237 00:55:57,020 --> 00:55:58,112 But he's... 1238 00:55:58,272 --> 00:56:00,445 You know his family, growing up... 1239 00:56:00,607 --> 00:56:04,202 He... had nothing, and so he was always looking over the fence 1240 00:56:04,361 --> 00:56:06,079 because he wanted a better life. 1241 00:56:06,363 --> 00:56:10,960 And that's why he worked four jobs at once, 1242 00:56:11,118 --> 00:56:13,496 so that he could put himself through school. 1243 00:56:13,662 --> 00:56:15,255 And he's amazing. 1244 00:56:15,414 --> 00:56:18,258 I mean, nobody can do that. 1245 00:56:20,335 --> 00:56:21,594 But the problem is, 1246 00:56:21,594 --> 00:56:26,759 now that... he... has everything, he can't turn it off. 1247 00:56:26,925 --> 00:56:29,519 And he still wants more and more 1248 00:56:29,678 --> 00:56:33,478 and a second house, and more kids, and a nicer car 1249 00:56:33,640 --> 00:56:37,986 and anything that he thinks is gonna make him happy. 1250 00:56:38,145 --> 00:56:40,318 And so he just keeps working 1251 00:56:40,439 --> 00:56:42,658 and he's not paying any attention to me. 1252 00:56:42,816 --> 00:56:45,035 - And I'm-I'm miserable. - Oh, God. 1253 00:56:45,193 --> 00:56:49,198 Because... I have huge feet. 1254 00:56:49,364 --> 00:56:50,957 They're size 11. 1255 00:56:51,533 --> 00:56:55,379 My foot has grown a half a size with each baby. 1256 00:56:55,537 --> 00:57:00,338 I have to go to this weird online shoe store to get shoes. 1257 00:57:01,126 --> 00:57:03,595 And I just want him to pay attention to me. 1258 00:57:03,754 --> 00:57:05,631 And I want him to grab me 1259 00:57:05,714 --> 00:57:08,638 and kiss me like he used to. 1260 00:57:10,510 --> 00:57:12,763 And it's like you always say, 1261 00:57:12,930 --> 00:57:15,399 Dave is a little bit of a pussy. 1262 00:57:17,142 --> 00:57:19,019 I always say that? 1263 00:57:19,478 --> 00:57:20,604 Yeah. 1264 00:57:20,771 --> 00:57:23,194 I always... I always say that because it's true. 1265 00:57:23,357 --> 00:57:26,952 Dave is a little bit of a pussy. 1266 00:57:27,110 --> 00:57:28,953 I hope that when he makes partner, 1267 00:57:29,112 --> 00:57:32,742 he can just finally stop and see... 1268 00:57:32,908 --> 00:57:35,411 and be happy, you know? 1269 00:57:35,577 --> 00:57:38,171 Cause how can you stay married to somebody 1270 00:57:38,330 --> 00:57:40,879 who is incapable of being happy? 1271 00:57:43,877 --> 00:57:45,470 What are you saying? 1272 00:57:46,630 --> 00:57:50,601 Holy fuck-knuckles, I've got freckles on my taint. 1273 00:57:50,759 --> 00:57:52,136 How awesome is that? 1274 00:57:52,302 --> 00:57:54,896 Hey, fag, what are you doing here? 1275 00:57:55,055 --> 00:57:56,648 Three days to three weeks? 1276 00:57:56,807 --> 00:57:58,605 You left the kids at daycare? 1277 00:57:58,684 --> 00:57:59,936 Come, on, Mitch! Those are my kids. 1278 00:58:00,102 --> 00:58:01,194 I can't do this shit any more. 1279 00:58:01,353 --> 00:58:03,071 Oh, no, no, no, no. no. You are gonna do this shit. 1280 00:58:03,230 --> 00:58:04,277 No, no, no, you don't get off that easy. 1281 00:58:04,356 --> 00:58:05,778 My marriage is falling apart, my job is on the line. 1282 00:58:05,857 --> 00:58:08,155 You are gonna be the best possible me you can be right now. 1283 00:58:08,318 --> 00:58:10,241 Dave, you don't understand. I cannot do this. 1284 00:58:10,320 --> 00:58:11,867 - You're gonna do it. - Not even for another hour. 1285 00:58:11,947 --> 00:58:13,790 I don't care! You're gonna stay here and you're gonna do this right! 1286 00:58:13,865 --> 00:58:17,039 Get out of my fucking way, or I'll drown you in your own goddamn tub! 1287 00:58:17,411 --> 00:58:18,628 Hey, hey, easy, motherfucker! 1288 00:58:18,704 --> 00:58:19,671 - If you leave now... - Get your hands off me. 1289 00:58:19,746 --> 00:58:20,747 ... this friendship is over! 1290 00:58:20,872 --> 00:58:21,964 Don't... Fuck you! Don't pull that shit on me. 1291 00:58:22,082 --> 00:58:23,131 - I'm serious, Mitch. - I gotta get the fuck out of here. 1292 00:58:23,131 --> 00:58:24,258 Shut up! 1293 00:58:24,293 --> 00:58:27,221 Jamie and the kids mean everything to me. 1294 00:58:28,463 --> 00:58:29,555 There's no walking out on this. 1295 00:58:29,631 --> 00:58:32,054 For once in your life, you gotta see something through. 1296 00:58:32,217 --> 00:58:33,218 What the fuck does that mean? 1297 00:58:33,385 --> 00:58:35,262 I'm gonna be honest with you, Mitch, 1298 00:58:35,429 --> 00:58:37,352 because there's a lot on the line here. 1299 00:58:38,306 --> 00:58:39,307 You're a quitter. 1300 00:58:39,975 --> 00:58:42,273 But quitting is not an option on this one, okay? 1301 00:58:42,436 --> 00:58:43,653 You focus, you find it. 1302 00:58:43,812 --> 00:58:47,533 I don't care where, but you find it inside of yourself, okay? 1303 00:58:47,691 --> 00:58:49,489 I know it's there. 1304 00:58:50,027 --> 00:58:51,449 It's not like I'm not trying. 1305 00:58:51,611 --> 00:58:54,114 I just don't know how to do all your grown-up crap. 1306 00:58:55,741 --> 00:58:57,118 You're gonna learn. 1307 00:58:58,213 --> 00:59:00,796 Yes. This is called a suit. You wear one every day. 1308 00:59:00,954 --> 00:59:05,425 Along with a necktie. Black, not white, socks. 1309 00:59:05,584 --> 00:59:08,258 - Dress shoes, not shower sandals. - Please. These are awful. 1310 00:59:08,420 --> 00:59:10,764 - And, of course, underwear. - Oh, come on. 1311 00:59:10,922 --> 00:59:12,469 No more commando, Mitch, 1312 00:59:12,549 --> 00:59:13,641 you're a grown-ass man. Put them on. 1313 00:59:13,800 --> 00:59:15,052 This is called a schedule. 1314 00:59:15,177 --> 00:59:16,394 It tells you everything you need to do each day. 1315 00:59:16,470 --> 00:59:17,767 Pick-u ps, drop-offs, activities, 1316 00:59:17,888 --> 00:59:19,185 play-dates, doctor's appointments, etc. 1317 00:59:19,347 --> 00:59:22,226 You'll notice that there are approximately 50 hours' worth of obligations 1318 00:59:22,392 --> 00:59:24,440 on any given day. Make it work. 1319 00:59:24,853 --> 00:59:26,526 This is called a grocery store. 1320 00:59:26,688 --> 00:59:29,567 People buy food here. It's part of your responsibilities. 1321 00:59:29,816 --> 00:59:30,817 Before heading to the market, 1322 00:59:30,901 --> 00:59:32,528 always call Jamie and ask her if she needs anything first. 1323 00:59:32,611 --> 00:59:33,828 In fact, before making any decision 1324 00:59:33,987 --> 00:59:35,239 in your life, no matter how small, 1325 00:59:35,405 --> 00:59:37,078 call your wife first. 1326 00:59:37,240 --> 00:59:39,288 Think of yourself as a brain-damaged mule, 1327 00:59:39,451 --> 00:59:41,419 lost in the desert, helpless, dumb 1328 00:59:41,495 --> 00:59:42,587 and in constant need of direction. 1329 00:59:42,746 --> 00:59:45,090 Never take the initiative, never strike out on your own, 1330 00:59:45,248 --> 00:59:47,250 and never deviate from the plan. Why? 1331 00:59:47,417 --> 00:59:49,169 Because you are a brain-damaged mule 1332 00:59:49,336 --> 00:59:51,509 and you are lost in the damn desert! 1333 00:59:51,838 --> 00:59:54,011 These are called children, or dependants. 1334 00:59:54,174 --> 00:59:55,596 Never disparage your own child. 1335 00:59:55,675 --> 00:59:56,972 Everything they do is a miracle from God. 1336 00:59:57,135 --> 00:59:58,557 When they're bad, it's only because 1337 00:59:58,637 --> 01:00:00,139 they're tired or going through a phase. 1338 01:00:00,305 --> 01:00:02,558 When other kids are bad, it's because of indulgent parenting 1339 01:00:02,974 --> 01:00:04,942 or innate defects in the child's character. 1340 01:00:06,061 --> 01:00:07,608 Be 15 minutes early for everything. 1341 01:00:07,771 --> 01:00:09,944 It doesn't matter what it is. A meeting, an event. 1342 01:00:10,107 --> 01:00:11,825 Less stress for me, less stress for you, less stress for... 1343 01:00:11,983 --> 01:00:13,985 Hey! You're married now, jackass. 1344 01:00:14,069 --> 01:00:15,161 You can't look at other women. 1345 01:00:15,320 --> 01:00:16,617 You can't talk to other women. 1346 01:00:16,696 --> 01:00:18,073 You can't even be interesting around other women. 1347 01:00:18,073 --> 01:00:20,201 Do everything in your power to desexualize yourself. 1348 01:00:20,367 --> 01:00:22,415 Wear a fanny pack, drive a Prius, 1349 01:00:22,577 --> 01:00:24,921 attach electronic devices to your belt, whatever it takes. 1350 01:00:24,996 --> 01:00:26,293 And if you find yourself forced to talk to a woman, 1351 01:00:26,373 --> 01:00:28,091 quickly find some way to mention the fact that you're married. 1352 01:00:28,166 --> 01:00:29,167 It doesn't even have to make sense. 1353 01:00:29,334 --> 01:00:32,304 Hi, how are you? Nice weather today. He's totally fucking married. 1354 01:00:34,256 --> 01:00:36,133 So I-I can't sleep with my wife, I can't sleep with other women? 1355 01:00:36,216 --> 01:00:38,709 - What the hell is that? - Marriage. 1356 01:00:42,180 --> 01:00:43,932 I think that's everything. 1357 01:00:44,099 --> 01:00:45,271 You got any more questions? 1358 01:00:45,433 --> 01:00:46,685 Do you ever have any free time? 1359 01:00:46,852 --> 01:00:48,354 Have you listened to a single word I've said? 1360 01:00:48,520 --> 01:00:49,863 There is no free time. 1361 01:00:50,021 --> 01:00:51,898 And at the end of the day, do you know what you get? 1362 01:00:52,065 --> 01:00:54,784 A fucking gun with a bullet to blow my head off with? 1363 01:00:54,943 --> 01:00:55,990 Sometimes you wish. 1364 01:00:57,946 --> 01:00:58,947 Hi. 1365 01:01:00,073 --> 01:01:01,620 Did you hear the good news? 1366 01:01:01,783 --> 01:01:04,787 Kinkabe and Amalgamated agreed to go into binding mediation in two days. 1367 01:01:04,953 --> 01:01:07,331 Wait, wait, wait. Hold up. What do you mean? Two days? 1368 01:01:09,708 --> 01:01:12,131 So, I'll have my briefs on your desk by lunch. 1369 01:01:12,294 --> 01:01:13,921 That puts my balls on your chin by dinner. 1370 01:01:14,713 --> 01:01:19,719 That, right there, is Schedule IV sexual harassment. 1371 01:01:19,885 --> 01:01:20,932 Awesome! 1372 01:01:21,094 --> 01:01:22,141 I'm sorry, have we met? 1373 01:01:23,221 --> 01:01:26,100 No, we haven't. I'm, uh, Mitch Planko. 1374 01:01:26,266 --> 01:01:27,392 Hi, Sabrina McKay. 1375 01:01:27,559 --> 01:01:28,606 Hey, Sabrina. 1376 01:01:29,519 --> 01:01:31,021 Hold on. 1377 01:01:31,479 --> 01:01:32,901 - You two guys should go out. - What? 1378 01:01:33,064 --> 01:01:35,192 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, man! 1379 01:01:35,358 --> 01:01:37,076 - Please stop. - You two guys need to go out. 1380 01:01:37,235 --> 01:01:39,203 Absolutely, you two should go out. 1381 01:01:39,362 --> 01:01:41,535 You're so single, Mitch, right? 1382 01:01:41,698 --> 01:01:45,373 And this one... you're so fucking white-hot, right? This body. 1383 01:01:45,535 --> 01:01:47,162 Did you do a lot of swimming in college? 1384 01:01:47,329 --> 01:01:49,172 - Don't answer that. - You bet she did. 1385 01:01:49,331 --> 01:01:50,753 Oh, my God, you guys need to go out, 1386 01:01:50,916 --> 01:01:52,418 have a nice steak dinner, do some dancing, 1387 01:01:52,584 --> 01:01:55,633 go to, like, a Korean nightclub, right?, I don't know, get a belly full of pills. 1388 01:01:55,795 --> 01:01:57,638 I don't know what you're into, but just have some fun, right? 1389 01:01:57,797 --> 01:02:01,427 What about Ecco on 7th Street, Saturday at 8:3O? 1390 01:02:02,302 --> 01:02:03,349 Great? Great! 1391 01:02:03,511 --> 01:02:05,354 He's totally free, so he's gonna meet you there. 1392 01:02:05,513 --> 01:02:06,730 Don't fuck on the roof, though. 1393 01:02:06,890 --> 01:02:09,268 That place has got this non-resin tar 1394 01:02:09,351 --> 01:02:10,944 that's a bastard to wash off. 1395 01:02:11,102 --> 01:02:13,275 So, just oral. 1396 01:02:13,605 --> 01:02:14,857 Yes, you're thinking about it. 1397 01:02:15,023 --> 01:02:16,115 She's in. 1398 01:02:16,274 --> 01:02:17,696 This is good. 1399 01:02:17,859 --> 01:02:20,282 You're gonna get me fired! You're gonna get me fired. I swear to God. 1400 01:02:20,445 --> 01:02:22,823 Shut it down. For one second, you listen to me. 1401 01:02:22,989 --> 01:02:24,411 For the first time in your life, 1402 01:02:24,491 --> 01:02:26,493 you're fucking... good-looking, okay? 1403 01:02:26,660 --> 01:02:29,379 You're-you're-you're single, you got the right number of fucking balls in that bag, 1404 01:02:29,537 --> 01:02:32,040 and you got the opportunity to nail number one on your cancer list. 1405 01:02:32,207 --> 01:02:33,424 I can't do that. I'm not doing it. 1406 01:02:33,583 --> 01:02:36,803 You need this! This is fucking dinner. With her! 1407 01:02:37,420 --> 01:02:39,263 This is so good. 1408 01:02:39,839 --> 01:02:41,232 I mean, what's going on between us, 1409 01:02:41,232 --> 01:02:44,310 it's just like... it's crazy, crazy. 1410 01:02:44,469 --> 01:02:46,892 Here's what's crazier, not using it. 1411 01:02:47,055 --> 01:02:49,183 Not using it on her. 1412 01:02:49,641 --> 01:02:51,518 You use it for her, you use it for you, 1413 01:02:51,685 --> 01:02:53,653 and maybe a little bit for me, you know? 1414 01:02:53,895 --> 01:02:55,112 Remind yourself of that. Remind yourself 1415 01:02:55,188 --> 01:02:57,987 of the big, fucking crater you created right there on Tuesday night. 1416 01:02:58,108 --> 01:02:59,530 - Oh, the Tuesday night, again. - I could use that. 1417 01:02:59,526 --> 01:03:01,119 - She'd fit perfectly in there. - Will you please drop that? 1418 01:03:01,236 --> 01:03:03,659 - Every day with the Tuesday night! - Well, it's a big goddamn deal! 1419 01:03:03,738 --> 01:03:05,740 You fucked me! You owe me! Respect my life! 1420 01:03:05,824 --> 01:03:07,041 Respect mine. 1421 01:03:07,200 --> 01:03:08,747 Yeah, you respect your life. 1422 01:03:09,619 --> 01:03:11,166 - Fine! - I'm proud of you. 1423 01:03:11,329 --> 01:03:13,423 You just promise me you listened to every word I said. 1424 01:03:13,581 --> 01:03:15,128 - I heard everything. - Every single syllable, you got it? 1425 01:03:15,292 --> 01:03:16,589 Did you hear everything I said? 1426 01:03:16,751 --> 01:03:19,379 - Caught a few things. - Yeah, just enough. 1427 01:03:19,713 --> 01:03:21,681 You betcha. You go have a good time, little girl. 1428 01:03:21,756 --> 01:03:25,101 I got your life all put away here, nice and safe. 1429 01:03:25,260 --> 01:03:26,307 Answer my phone. 1430 01:03:26,970 --> 01:03:27,971 Hello. 1431 01:03:28,138 --> 01:03:29,310 Hi, Mitch Planko. 1432 01:03:29,472 --> 01:03:31,019 Bingo! Who the fuck is this? 1433 01:03:31,182 --> 01:03:32,229 What? 1434 01:03:32,976 --> 01:03:34,228 -Dad? - Hello? 1435 01:03:36,229 --> 01:03:38,857 Is this Mitch's dad? Is this Mitch, Sr? 1436 01:03:38,940 --> 01:03:42,820 - Dave? - Hi, uh, this is Dave Lockwood. 1437 01:03:42,986 --> 01:03:44,329 Why are you calling me? 1438 01:03:44,487 --> 01:03:47,536 Uh, I just wondered if we can get together for a little while today. 1439 01:03:50,660 --> 01:03:53,504 - Boy, it's a work day. - Half an hour. 1440 01:03:53,663 --> 01:03:57,384 I don't-I don't-I don't look... I look different. I... I don't like my outfit today. 1441 01:03:57,542 --> 01:03:59,010 Dave, half an hour. 1442 01:03:59,544 --> 01:04:01,387 Mitch, Sr. wants to sit down with Dave Lockwood. 1443 01:04:01,546 --> 01:04:03,048 - Yeah. - Why? 1444 01:04:03,965 --> 01:04:06,138 I need to talk to you about Mitch. 1445 01:04:10,347 --> 01:04:11,599 Hello. 1446 01:04:12,015 --> 01:04:14,619 - Dave. How are you? - Good, thank you. 1447 01:04:14,654 --> 01:04:17,445 What are we doing here? When was the last time the two of us saw each other? 1448 01:04:17,520 --> 01:04:19,614 I don't care. Listen. 1449 01:04:19,773 --> 01:04:22,822 I'm getting married to a very beautiful woman named Pamela. 1450 01:04:23,109 --> 01:04:24,326 - Her name's Pamela? - Yes. 1451 01:04:24,486 --> 01:04:26,784 Wow, you can say "I do" in English this time, huh? 1452 01:04:26,946 --> 01:04:29,244 - What? - Is Pamela from America? 1453 01:04:29,324 --> 01:04:30,450 Yes. 1454 01:04:30,533 --> 01:04:31,705 Anyway, uh... 1455 01:04:32,410 --> 01:04:34,037 I'm not gonna have anybody there. 1456 01:04:34,120 --> 01:04:36,589 The only family I have is... is Mitch. 1457 01:04:37,123 --> 01:04:39,125 I went to his apartment a couple of days ago 1458 01:04:39,292 --> 01:04:41,966 and told him that Pamela would like him 1459 01:04:42,045 --> 01:04:43,342 to say a few words at the wedding 1460 01:04:43,505 --> 01:04:44,597 and that wasn't true. 1461 01:04:44,756 --> 01:04:46,929 Truth of the matter is, I would like him to say a few words, 1462 01:04:47,092 --> 01:04:49,515 if he could find it in his heart to do so. 1463 01:04:52,222 --> 01:04:53,565 I don't know why you don't tell him yourself. 1464 01:04:53,723 --> 01:04:55,817 That is a very nice thing for a son to hear. 1465 01:04:57,685 --> 01:04:59,187 So, you want me to go tell Mitch 1466 01:04:59,270 --> 01:05:00,647 that you'd like 'im at the wedding. 1467 01:05:00,814 --> 01:05:02,407 And he's gonna say "Why the hell does 1468 01:05:02,482 --> 01:05:04,109 he want me there? He thinks I'm an idiot." 1469 01:05:04,484 --> 01:05:06,907 Well, that's not totally true. 1470 01:05:07,070 --> 01:05:09,698 I think he's got... I think he's got some nice qualities. 1471 01:05:09,864 --> 01:05:12,458 I think he's got some problem areas, too. 1472 01:05:12,617 --> 01:05:13,584 What are those? 1473 01:05:13,660 --> 01:05:15,378 You're his friend, you know him as well as I do. 1474 01:05:15,537 --> 01:05:17,414 You probably know him better than I do. He's a quitter! 1475 01:05:17,580 --> 01:05:19,457 He's never finished anything in his life. 1476 01:05:19,624 --> 01:05:21,422 He picks up something, he puts it down. 1477 01:05:21,584 --> 01:05:23,928 He's good at it for five minutes, and it's gone. 1478 01:05:24,087 --> 01:05:26,761 He's flaccid. No gumption. No get-up-and-go. 1479 01:05:26,923 --> 01:05:29,927 His accomplishments could rest comfortably on an eyelash. 1480 01:05:30,093 --> 01:05:32,016 Oh, he'd probably say "Fuck you ", if he heard you say that. 1481 01:05:32,178 --> 01:05:33,976 Well, maybe he would, maybe he wouldn't. 1482 01:05:34,139 --> 01:05:35,982 But I want him to be part of my life. 1483 01:05:36,141 --> 01:05:39,520 With all due respect, Mr. Planko, you don't know Mitch. 1484 01:05:40,937 --> 01:05:42,860 You know, what you don't realize about him 1485 01:05:42,939 --> 01:05:44,657 is that he's a fucking Jedi! 1486 01:05:45,108 --> 01:05:47,406 - A what? - He's a Jedi Knight, sir. 1487 01:05:47,694 --> 01:05:51,289 And next time you see him, he's gonna be slitting throats. 1488 01:06:01,249 --> 01:06:02,250 Fuck! 1489 01:06:12,469 --> 01:06:15,097 I'm not a fucking quitter! 1490 01:06:26,191 --> 01:06:27,693 All right, let's do this. 1491 01:06:29,486 --> 01:06:30,658 Good morning, Patty-cakes. 1492 01:06:30,820 --> 01:06:32,572 Daddy needs a box set of Law & Order, 1493 01:06:32,739 --> 01:06:34,616 three meatball subs and a hand-folded, 1494 01:06:34,699 --> 01:06:36,497 24-inch samurai sword, chop-chop. 1495 01:06:38,369 --> 01:06:41,796 - What are you doing? - I got this one. I got it. 1496 01:06:41,998 --> 01:06:43,090 Back to bed. 1497 01:07:00,099 --> 01:07:02,397 You are in dire financial need! 1498 01:07:02,560 --> 01:07:03,652 Objection! 1499 01:07:05,146 --> 01:07:06,147 Sustained. 1500 01:07:30,547 --> 01:07:31,799 Excuse me. 1501 01:07:40,056 --> 01:07:41,057 Hi. 1502 01:07:50,900 --> 01:07:52,902 Fuck me, she's cute. 1503 01:07:56,406 --> 01:07:57,703 Here comes the battement. 1504 01:08:05,123 --> 01:08:07,251 Fucking nice, Cara! 1505 01:08:07,584 --> 01:08:08,585 Sweet! 1506 01:08:10,128 --> 01:08:12,677 That bitch bounced. Beautiful! 1507 01:08:12,839 --> 01:08:15,968 Man alive! That's my daughter, bitches! 1508 01:08:16,384 --> 01:08:18,261 Dad's very proud. Keep going. 1509 01:08:28,021 --> 01:08:30,399 Oh, I mean, what did we learn from this? 1510 01:08:30,815 --> 01:08:32,658 Always solve my problems with violence. 1511 01:08:32,817 --> 01:08:35,411 That's bingo, baby! Five, up high. 1512 01:08:35,778 --> 01:08:36,779 - No! - Yes! 1513 01:08:36,946 --> 01:08:38,539 No, that is not the lesson that we learned, Cara. 1514 01:08:38,698 --> 01:08:39,745 It is! 1515 01:08:39,907 --> 01:08:41,580 Violence is cool. 1516 01:08:41,743 --> 01:08:43,541 - Dave. - Kidding. 1517 01:08:44,287 --> 01:08:45,504 I'm not kidding. 1518 01:08:50,793 --> 01:08:52,450 She did make a pretty funny sound, though, 1519 01:08:52,450 --> 01:08:55,094 - when she hit the ground like that. - Yes, she did, yes, she did! 1520 01:08:56,382 --> 01:08:58,134 But don't make a habit out of that, okay? 1521 01:08:58,301 --> 01:09:00,269 - I know. - All right. 1522 01:09:03,681 --> 01:09:05,729 I love you, daddy. 1523 01:09:09,771 --> 01:09:11,773 I love you, little girl. 1524 01:09:19,197 --> 01:09:20,323 Hey. 1525 01:09:21,574 --> 01:09:23,747 That ass looks real hot, you know. 1526 01:09:23,951 --> 01:09:25,077 You like my ass? 1527 01:09:25,286 --> 01:09:27,414 Yeah. Tight as a drum. 1528 01:09:28,414 --> 01:09:30,758 Wouldn't mind putting my drumstick in it. 1529 01:09:31,250 --> 01:09:35,756 Ooh! Really? Ha. Keep going. 1530 01:09:35,838 --> 01:09:37,511 I like how big and fat those tits have gotten. 1531 01:09:38,633 --> 01:09:42,012 This little calf wants to get her mouth on the udders. 1532 01:09:42,261 --> 01:09:47,609 And I think that I want you to fuck me like you just got outta jail. 1533 01:09:47,975 --> 01:09:48,976 Roger that. 1534 01:09:49,227 --> 01:09:51,855 And you don't even have to go down on me because I know it's late. 1535 01:09:52,105 --> 01:09:54,278 Appreciate it. All right, turn around. 1536 01:09:54,357 --> 01:09:56,075 Oh! What are you doing? Here we go. 1537 01:09:56,234 --> 01:09:58,362 What do you mean, what am I doing? I thought you said you wanted to have some sex. 1538 01:09:58,444 --> 01:10:02,119 Yeah, but not like two dudes at a rest stop, okay? 1539 01:10:02,740 --> 01:10:06,790 Okay. Uhh, I got it. I got it. Run go grab me three Q-tips? 1540 01:10:06,953 --> 01:10:10,002 How about we just do what we always do? 1541 01:10:12,625 --> 01:10:16,050 What do you mean, with a... with a lot of eye contact and-and real personal? 1542 01:10:16,170 --> 01:10:17,296 Uh-huh. Come here. I love you. 1543 01:10:17,380 --> 01:10:18,848 Yeah. Oh, shh, don't say that. 1544 01:10:18,923 --> 01:10:20,266 Let's not... How about no talking, okay? 1545 01:10:20,341 --> 01:10:22,469 We can do some silent sex. Seriously. 1546 01:10:22,969 --> 01:10:24,471 - Kiss me. - No, no, no. No talking. 1547 01:10:24,595 --> 01:10:26,813 All right, let me kiss a shoulder first. Okay? 1548 01:10:26,813 --> 01:10:27,606 Okay. 1549 01:10:27,606 --> 01:10:29,646 There you go. Where's that hand goin'? 1550 01:10:29,726 --> 01:10:31,603 - Hello! - Did you shave your balls? 1551 01:10:34,397 --> 01:10:37,071 Who doesn't love a couple of smooth criminals? 1552 01:10:37,150 --> 01:10:39,494 Is that why there was all that pubic hair in the drain? 1553 01:10:40,361 --> 01:10:43,365 - I would bet, yeah. - Why are you still soft? 1554 01:10:43,448 --> 01:10:46,998 I don't know. Can we try the no-talking for just, like, three minutes? 1555 01:10:47,076 --> 01:10:48,202 That's all it's gonna take, okay? 1556 01:10:48,286 --> 01:10:50,584 Let's do it like we did it on our wedding night. 1557 01:10:50,663 --> 01:10:52,440 No, no. No, no, no, no, no. Jamie, what are you talking about, 1558 01:10:52,440 --> 01:10:53,427 our fucking wedding night? 1559 01:10:53,462 --> 01:10:55,304 - God! - Why not? 1560 01:10:55,304 --> 01:10:57,920 I can't do this! I cannot believe I can't do this! 1561 01:10:58,004 --> 01:11:00,348 What the hell is happening? Goddamn it! 1562 01:11:02,300 --> 01:11:03,347 What? 1563 01:11:08,097 --> 01:11:09,223 You don't want to have sex with me? 1564 01:11:09,307 --> 01:11:10,524 Yeah, I wanna have sex with you. 1565 01:11:10,600 --> 01:11:12,773 I've wanted to have sex with you since the sixth grade! 1566 01:11:12,852 --> 01:11:14,775 I mean, you should be... a mess by now, 1567 01:11:14,854 --> 01:11:16,481 - but things are not... - Well, let's do it! 1568 01:11:17,565 --> 01:11:18,817 This is new. 1569 01:11:20,902 --> 01:11:21,903 Sorry, Jamie. 1570 01:11:22,487 --> 01:11:24,990 This is... I think I'm-I'm in... I'm over my head. 1571 01:11:25,072 --> 01:11:27,416 I think I'm way in over my head. I got this fucking house, 1572 01:11:27,492 --> 01:11:28,637 and a job, and a family... 1573 01:11:28,637 --> 01:11:32,630 I got, you know, I got you, I got the kids, I got a fucking carpool. And rules! 1574 01:11:32,705 --> 01:11:35,879 I've got... these fucking rules, half of which I don't even understand. 1575 01:11:35,958 --> 01:11:39,553 This is impossible. I don't know how to be this man. 1576 01:11:40,379 --> 01:11:41,551 I'm sorry. 1577 01:11:45,885 --> 01:11:47,478 - Sorry. - That's okay. 1578 01:11:48,137 --> 01:11:49,389 That's okay. 1579 01:11:51,474 --> 01:11:52,600 Come 'ere. 1580 01:12:00,566 --> 01:12:02,630 Yeah, it's fantastic in here. 1581 01:12:02,630 --> 01:12:06,494 It's... very warm. I think I remember this. 1582 01:12:08,282 --> 01:12:09,283 Mm-hm. 1583 01:12:15,581 --> 01:12:16,753 Dave Lockwood. 1584 01:12:17,917 --> 01:12:20,170 Mitch! Wh-wh-where the hell are you? 1585 01:12:20,253 --> 01:12:22,927 It's been two days. I gotta know what's going on with Jamie. 1586 01:12:23,005 --> 01:12:24,222 Call me back. 1587 01:12:25,633 --> 01:12:27,055 What the hell is he doing? 1588 01:12:32,807 --> 01:12:34,935 Mitch. Hi. 1589 01:12:36,018 --> 01:12:37,440 Jamie. What... what are you doing here? 1590 01:12:38,020 --> 01:12:40,569 I come here every Saturday after yoga. What are you doing here? 1591 01:12:41,065 --> 01:12:45,195 I am plowing the crap out of this chick around the corner, 1592 01:12:45,278 --> 01:12:47,246 and now we're gonna have dinner. We're gonna make some scallops, 1593 01:12:47,321 --> 01:12:50,291 and then-then it's gonna get ugly. This-this-this chick is a mess. 1594 01:12:50,533 --> 01:12:52,535 Why do you have to talk like that? You have such a sweet side. 1595 01:12:52,618 --> 01:12:54,712 You should let people into your sweet side. 1596 01:12:55,121 --> 01:12:57,878 Yeah. Listen, I wanted to ask you something. Um... 1597 01:12:58,249 --> 01:13:01,128 The other night, you-you... you were in a pretty dark place. 1598 01:13:01,210 --> 01:13:02,211 Oh, yeah. I know. 1599 01:13:02,295 --> 01:13:03,342 How's that going with Dave? 1600 01:13:03,421 --> 01:13:04,638 Is-is he treating you a little bit better? 1601 01:13:04,714 --> 01:13:06,466 Yeah. He's been very sweet. 1602 01:13:07,008 --> 01:13:10,137 - Really open and communicative... - Good. 1603 01:13:10,219 --> 01:13:12,347 He held my hand all night while we slept last night. 1604 01:13:12,430 --> 01:13:13,556 Attaboy! 1605 01:13:13,973 --> 01:13:15,771 Did you tell Dave to shave his balls? 1606 01:13:17,226 --> 01:13:18,273 Uh... 1607 01:13:18,769 --> 01:13:20,692 Don't act like you didn't tell him. I know it came from you. 1608 01:13:20,771 --> 01:13:23,069 Don't tell 'im to do... Don't be a bad influence on him. 1609 01:13:23,149 --> 01:13:24,822 Oh, I though you two might like that. 1610 01:13:25,067 --> 01:13:28,321 No, I don't like that. It needs some... coverage. 1611 01:13:28,529 --> 01:13:30,327 Yeah, I-I'll tell him to grow it out. 1612 01:13:31,032 --> 01:13:32,750 - It was really great seeing you. - You okay? 1613 01:13:33,034 --> 01:13:36,629 I'm good. I'm good, in fact, I'm much... Much better now. 1614 01:13:36,704 --> 01:13:37,956 - All right, good. - Yeah. 1615 01:13:38,039 --> 01:13:39,256 - Okay. - All right. 1616 01:14:02,939 --> 01:14:04,816 Okay, I'm awake. 1617 01:14:16,494 --> 01:14:17,586 Fuck it. 1618 01:14:31,384 --> 01:14:33,557 - Hello, I'm trying to find... - Oh, come on! 1619 01:14:33,719 --> 01:14:36,393 Look, bring it to me in the office. I don't care. 1620 01:14:36,555 --> 01:14:38,307 Relax, I'll be there. Yes, sir. 1621 01:14:38,641 --> 01:14:41,064 Just look at... This is important. Taxi! 1622 01:14:56,409 --> 01:14:59,382 Thank you. Thank you, America. 1623 01:15:09,755 --> 01:15:11,302 Whoa! 1624 01:15:36,323 --> 01:15:37,996 I got my eye on you! 1625 01:15:55,634 --> 01:15:56,681 Go for Lockwood. 1626 01:15:56,761 --> 01:15:58,434 Mitch, I-I'm panicking over here. 1627 01:15:58,512 --> 01:16:00,185 I-I haven't been on a date in 18 years. 1628 01:16:00,473 --> 01:16:02,475 Okay? I'm drowning in my own fear. 1629 01:16:02,641 --> 01:16:03,984 Relax and calm down. 1630 01:16:04,143 --> 01:16:06,942 No, don't tell me to relax! You did this to me. I can't do it, okay? 1631 01:16:07,313 --> 01:16:08,815 Don't move, I'll be right there. 1632 01:16:11,484 --> 01:16:12,531 Mitch? 1633 01:16:12,818 --> 01:16:13,819 Hey. 1634 01:16:14,320 --> 01:16:15,492 How do I look? 1635 01:16:17,364 --> 01:16:19,833 Just grow a mustache and lure a child into your van. 1636 01:16:19,992 --> 01:16:21,335 Where did you find that shit? 1637 01:16:21,619 --> 01:16:22,996 The back of your closet. 1638 01:16:23,162 --> 01:16:24,664 Put it back! 1639 01:16:24,997 --> 01:16:26,340 These are called jeans. 1640 01:16:26,499 --> 01:16:28,217 They've been popular with America's youth for over 60 years. 1641 01:16:28,375 --> 01:16:31,675 - Jeans to a restaurant? - Yeah, jeans to a restaurant. 1642 01:16:31,837 --> 01:16:32,884 Look who else can hit. 1643 01:16:33,047 --> 01:16:35,141 In order to feel confident, you gotta look good, okay? 1644 01:16:35,216 --> 01:16:36,684 This is a vest, put that on. 1645 01:16:37,551 --> 01:16:39,974 Okay, this is called gel or product. 1646 01:16:40,137 --> 01:16:41,605 Too little, you look like a pedophile, 1647 01:16:41,680 --> 01:16:43,478 too much... you look Persian. 1648 01:16:43,641 --> 01:16:45,234 Mitch, I've done everything that you have asked of me. 1649 01:16:45,309 --> 01:16:47,437 I got the jeans on, I got the vest, the gel in my hair... 1650 01:16:47,561 --> 01:16:48,240 - You look great. ... - Thank you very much 1651 01:16:48,240 --> 01:16:49,003 but I'm not gonna do this. 1652 01:16:49,003 --> 01:16:50,694 - Yes, you are gonna do this. - Why-why do I have to do this? 1653 01:16:50,856 --> 01:16:52,449 Because it shows that you're considerate, 1654 01:16:52,525 --> 01:16:54,323 that you're clean, that you're American. 1655 01:16:54,485 --> 01:16:56,212 - Why do you even care? - What do you mean, what do I care? 1656 01:16:56,212 --> 01:16:58,076 - It's my body! - It's my body right now! 1657 01:16:58,239 --> 01:17:00,082 I'm scared! 1658 01:17:00,866 --> 01:17:02,584 There, we have it. 1659 01:17:02,868 --> 01:17:05,087 Nobody ever needs to know that this happened, Mitch. 1660 01:17:10,376 --> 01:17:13,380 Boy, real tempting to kiss my own dick. 1661 01:17:13,546 --> 01:17:14,547 Ah, that tickles. 1662 01:17:14,713 --> 01:17:16,590 Shh, you're jiggling the sack. 1663 01:17:16,715 --> 01:17:18,934 Oh, you're gonna go all the way back there, huh? 1664 01:17:19,051 --> 01:17:20,849 We're going to dinner, not Rio. 1665 01:17:21,387 --> 01:17:23,230 All right. You got any extra batteries? 1666 01:17:44,243 --> 01:17:45,210 Hi. 1667 01:17:45,286 --> 01:17:46,629 - Mitch. - How are you? 1668 01:17:48,789 --> 01:17:50,462 Okay. 1669 01:17:51,250 --> 01:17:53,048 So... 1670 01:17:56,463 --> 01:17:57,464 What's, uh, the weather? 1671 01:17:57,923 --> 01:17:59,971 Listen, the only reason I'm here 1672 01:18:00,050 --> 01:18:01,427 is because my boss told me to be. 1673 01:18:01,760 --> 01:18:03,808 This is not a date. This is not a "get to know you". 1674 01:18:04,180 --> 01:18:06,023 This is just me trying to save my job. 1675 01:18:06,932 --> 01:18:07,979 I'm-I'm gonna go. 1676 01:18:08,142 --> 01:18:09,234 Just sit the fuck back down. 1677 01:18:09,393 --> 01:18:12,397 I showered, I showed up, I'm starving and I could use a drink. 1678 01:18:13,981 --> 01:18:15,449 How long have you known Dave? 1679 01:18:16,442 --> 01:18:17,910 My whole life, actually. 1680 01:18:18,068 --> 01:18:20,287 And have you ever seen him act like he did yesterday? 1681 01:18:20,446 --> 01:18:21,823 Um, like a super-douche? 1682 01:18:22,239 --> 01:18:23,786 Yeah. 1683 01:18:23,949 --> 01:18:25,576 Uh, I have, at times. 1684 01:18:25,743 --> 01:18:28,963 But I'm-I'm really hoping that he didn't say anything to offend you. 1685 01:18:29,121 --> 01:18:30,122 He totally did. 1686 01:18:30,289 --> 01:18:33,133 But I like being offended, just usually after work. 1687 01:18:33,209 --> 01:18:34,210 Wow. 1688 01:18:34,293 --> 01:18:36,170 - Here's the bottle you ordered, sir. - Excellent. 1689 01:18:36,337 --> 01:18:37,429 Mm-mm, send that shit back. 1690 01:18:37,588 --> 01:18:39,340 Bring us two Macallan 25s, neat. 1691 01:18:39,506 --> 01:18:41,304 - Right away, ma'am. - Right away. 1692 01:18:41,967 --> 01:18:43,469 So, let me ask you something. 1693 01:18:43,844 --> 01:18:44,845 It's a question. 1694 01:18:45,021 --> 01:18:47,435 Um... How do you like working with Dave? 1695 01:18:47,598 --> 01:18:48,645 How is he? 1696 01:18:50,142 --> 01:18:51,644 I love it. 1697 01:18:52,102 --> 01:18:53,604 I mean, he's a brilliant lawyer. 1698 01:18:54,021 --> 01:18:55,989 He's... the best. 1699 01:18:56,218 --> 01:19:02,822 I mean, I... Actually, if you must know, 1700 01:19:03,822 --> 01:19:06,826 I, uh, I used to kinda have a crush on Dave. 1701 01:19:07,993 --> 01:19:11,543 Oh, no, you didn't! 1702 01:19:12,456 --> 01:19:13,423 You're funny. 1703 01:19:13,499 --> 01:19:15,297 I mean, obviously, he's married, so... 1704 01:19:15,459 --> 01:19:18,463 Right, obviously, obviously, obviously. 1705 01:19:19,004 --> 01:19:20,631 - Super-married. - What do you do, Mitch? 1706 01:19:20,714 --> 01:19:22,512 - Me? For a living? - Yeah. 1707 01:19:22,675 --> 01:19:25,303 You know, um, I am... 1708 01:19:27,638 --> 01:19:28,685 I... 1709 01:19:30,015 --> 01:19:32,894 I'm... When I'm not eating hummus and ferociously masturbating, 1710 01:19:33,060 --> 01:19:35,404 I dabble in light porn. 1711 01:19:35,813 --> 01:19:37,986 - I hear that's a growth industry. - Yeah! 1712 01:19:38,524 --> 01:19:39,992 See to get everything on the dessert menu. 1713 01:19:40,150 --> 01:19:42,653 I'm gonna order, like, six desserts. 1714 01:19:46,073 --> 01:19:47,541 Oh, my God. 1715 01:19:53,038 --> 01:19:54,415 No, no, no! No! 1716 01:19:57,584 --> 01:19:59,177 Do I have anything in my teeth? 1717 01:20:02,381 --> 01:20:03,849 That's a lot of sugar. 1718 01:20:04,008 --> 01:20:05,885 Yeah. A lot of scotch! 1719 01:20:06,051 --> 01:20:08,600 Yeah. That was a lot of fun, though, is what it really was. 1720 01:20:08,762 --> 01:20:11,106 Was? What, are we done? 1721 01:20:11,265 --> 01:20:12,562 It's only, like, 2:00! 1722 01:20:12,725 --> 01:20:14,727 No! I'm just messing with you. 1723 01:20:15,894 --> 01:20:17,362 God, no, let's, uh... 1724 01:20:17,521 --> 01:20:19,569 We'll go to a rave or something. You want to get raving? 1725 01:20:19,732 --> 01:20:21,234 People raving right now? 1726 01:20:21,400 --> 01:20:23,698 - Let's rave! - Yeah. 1727 01:20:23,861 --> 01:20:25,408 I forgot about raves! 1728 01:20:25,571 --> 01:20:27,744 Oh, man, I'm messing with you. 1729 01:20:27,906 --> 01:20:29,249 Go and do that? No. 1730 01:20:29,908 --> 01:20:31,876 - I do have an idea. - Uh-huh. 1731 01:20:32,286 --> 01:20:33,754 What do you think about doing something 1732 01:20:33,912 --> 01:20:38,292 that we will really, really regret in the morning? 1733 01:20:40,878 --> 01:20:41,879 You into it? 1734 01:20:44,298 --> 01:20:46,266 Yeah, we can definitely do that. 1735 01:20:46,925 --> 01:20:47,926 Okay! 1736 01:20:48,093 --> 01:20:50,471 - Okay. Let's go. - All right, let's go. 1737 01:20:50,637 --> 01:20:52,560 Fuck, fuck, fuck! 1738 01:20:54,641 --> 01:20:57,019 Oh, my God. Oh, my God, oh, my God. 1739 01:21:07,571 --> 01:21:08,572 Oh, God! 1740 01:21:10,282 --> 01:21:11,499 Oh. Wow. Really? 1741 01:21:11,658 --> 01:21:13,376 You're sure that's what you want? 1742 01:21:13,535 --> 01:21:15,378 Absolutely. I like that. 1743 01:21:15,537 --> 01:21:19,462 You're okay with that being on your body for... for, like, forever? 1744 01:21:19,625 --> 01:21:21,673 I-I feel pretty good about it. 1745 01:21:21,835 --> 01:21:22,961 How is yours down there? 1746 01:21:23,128 --> 01:21:24,425 It's good, it's good. 1747 01:21:24,588 --> 01:21:25,635 It tickles a little. 1748 01:21:26,131 --> 01:21:27,599 - Rico. - Yo. 1749 01:21:27,758 --> 01:21:28,759 What do you think of this turn, man? 1750 01:21:31,595 --> 01:21:32,596 I don't know, man. 1751 01:21:33,347 --> 01:21:34,894 - Ask Tommy. - Tommy! 1752 01:21:35,224 --> 01:21:36,316 Yeah, man. 1753 01:21:36,392 --> 01:21:38,019 Check this out, man. 1754 01:21:41,021 --> 01:21:43,399 You-you never did tell me about your childhood. 1755 01:21:43,774 --> 01:21:45,617 Really? Now? 1756 01:21:45,776 --> 01:21:47,699 With the Sons of Anarchy between your... 1757 01:21:47,861 --> 01:21:49,488 Um, let's see here... 1758 01:21:49,655 --> 01:21:51,123 Tommy, Rico. Hey, guys. 1759 01:21:51,281 --> 01:21:52,373 We're sightseeing now. 1760 01:21:52,533 --> 01:21:55,002 Let's move it along, please. Come on. 1761 01:21:55,327 --> 01:21:56,579 You are such a gentleman. 1762 01:21:56,745 --> 01:21:59,089 Now you only have one ponytailed ex-convict between your legs, 1763 01:21:59,248 --> 01:22:00,249 so everything is fine. 1764 01:22:02,668 --> 01:22:04,591 I'm kidding. I was absolutely joking. 1765 01:22:05,129 --> 01:22:07,848 I love your ponytail. And that little pirate beard. 1766 01:22:08,006 --> 01:22:09,349 Go kidding. 1767 01:22:17,808 --> 01:22:19,435 Uh, that's me, there. 1768 01:22:19,601 --> 01:22:21,319 - This is you. - Mm-hm. 1769 01:22:21,478 --> 01:22:23,697 - Yeah, that's-that's nice. - Thanks. 1770 01:22:23,856 --> 01:22:24,948 Yeah. 1771 01:22:34,700 --> 01:22:35,872 Well, good night. 1772 01:22:37,828 --> 01:22:39,000 Good night. 1773 01:22:46,850 --> 01:22:48,662 - Hey, Mitch? - Yeah? 1774 01:22:49,631 --> 01:22:51,554 Are you gonna call me? 1775 01:22:54,178 --> 01:22:56,306 I-I-I thought you said this wasn't a date. 1776 01:22:58,348 --> 01:23:00,021 Things change. 1777 01:23:07,858 --> 01:23:09,860 - That's a cute tie. - Thank you. 1778 01:23:10,527 --> 01:23:12,279 You should wear that to the party. 1779 01:23:12,446 --> 01:23:13,743 What party? 1780 01:23:14,740 --> 01:23:16,117 Our anniversary party. 1781 01:23:20,078 --> 01:23:22,922 Our anniversary party? Why the fuck wasn't I... 1782 01:23:24,082 --> 01:23:26,710 - What about Mitch? - What about Mitch?! 1783 01:23:26,877 --> 01:23:28,925 You said you didn't want him to come. 1784 01:23:29,922 --> 01:23:31,924 - I did? - Yeah. 1785 01:23:32,216 --> 01:23:34,969 And you said you were really embarrassed of him. 1786 01:23:35,886 --> 01:23:37,058 That's why I didn't invite him. 1787 01:23:37,221 --> 01:23:38,894 I can't believe I don't remember that. 1788 01:23:39,056 --> 01:23:40,558 You also said that you, uh, thought 1789 01:23:40,641 --> 01:23:42,268 that he would get... hammered 1790 01:23:42,434 --> 01:23:44,311 and hit on all of our married friends, be mean to my grandma 1791 01:23:44,478 --> 01:23:46,276 and turn the whole thing into a key party. 1792 01:23:46,605 --> 01:23:47,606 Once, that happened. 1793 01:23:47,773 --> 01:23:50,401 And you said he would force everyone to do kamikaze shots, 1794 01:23:50,567 --> 01:23:52,661 spike the punch with ecstasy, 1795 01:23:52,736 --> 01:23:54,238 give all the girls breast exams and... 1796 01:23:54,404 --> 01:23:55,951 That was the same party. 1797 01:23:56,240 --> 01:23:58,208 Hm. Weird. 1798 01:23:58,283 --> 01:24:00,627 Maybe we should talk about your bad memory at Dialogue Night. 1799 01:24:00,786 --> 01:24:03,756 Stilton Coffee House tonight. Don't forget. 1800 01:24:05,290 --> 01:24:06,633 - Okay. - Okay? 1801 01:24:07,793 --> 01:24:08,794 Bye. 1802 01:24:32,901 --> 01:24:33,993 Hello. 1803 01:24:34,152 --> 01:24:36,871 Uh, this is District Manager Carla Nelson 1804 01:24:36,947 --> 01:24:38,665 from the Atlanta Department of Parks. 1805 01:24:38,824 --> 01:24:39,825 Oh, yeah, yeah. 1806 01:24:39,992 --> 01:24:43,371 Well, we have found that fountain. 1807 01:24:43,537 --> 01:24:46,837 It's been moved to 1100 Peachtree Boulevard. 1808 01:24:46,999 --> 01:24:49,001 You found it. Okay, well... 1809 01:24:49,668 --> 01:24:52,137 Uh, okay, w-w-yeah we-we'll be there soon. 1810 01:24:52,296 --> 01:24:54,845 All righty, then. Have a good day. 1811 01:24:55,007 --> 01:24:56,008 Thank you. 1812 01:25:05,851 --> 01:25:07,228 - Hi. - Hi. 1813 01:25:07,853 --> 01:25:08,900 How are you? 1814 01:25:08,979 --> 01:25:11,482 Good. Just on my way to see Dave. 1815 01:25:11,648 --> 01:25:13,598 Actually, um, 1816 01:25:14,234 --> 01:25:17,033 all the senior staff is gonna be at the mediation tomorrow. 1817 01:25:17,195 --> 01:25:19,664 So, I snagged Flemming's seats 1818 01:25:19,740 --> 01:25:21,868 to the Marlins-Braves game. 1819 01:25:22,034 --> 01:25:24,537 You, me, beer, baseball. 1820 01:25:24,703 --> 01:25:25,750 What more could a guy want? 1821 01:25:29,207 --> 01:25:31,551 Don't take this the wrong way. 1822 01:25:31,710 --> 01:25:34,088 I would really love to go to that game with you, but I don't-I don't... 1823 01:25:34,254 --> 01:25:36,177 Are you breaking up with me? 1824 01:25:39,426 --> 01:25:40,928 - W-what? - I'm messing with you. 1825 01:25:41,428 --> 01:25:42,684 Oh! 1826 01:25:43,555 --> 01:25:45,057 Look, it's just a baseball game. 1827 01:25:45,223 --> 01:25:46,600 They're dugout seats. 1828 01:25:46,933 --> 01:25:49,937 Whatever you have to do, cancel it. 1829 01:26:03,492 --> 01:26:04,493 Hey. 1830 01:26:05,619 --> 01:26:06,620 They found the fountain. 1831 01:26:06,787 --> 01:26:08,881 Yeah, they did. She called me, too. 1832 01:26:09,581 --> 01:26:10,582 Yeah. 1833 01:26:12,042 --> 01:26:13,043 So... 1834 01:26:13,919 --> 01:26:17,180 - Good news. - Yeah, it's good news. 1835 01:26:18,715 --> 01:26:20,058 Awesome. 1836 01:26:20,425 --> 01:26:22,928 We should probably go, you know, take a piss. 1837 01:26:23,428 --> 01:26:25,772 Yeah, yeah, let's do it. 1838 01:26:26,139 --> 01:26:27,140 Yeah. 1839 01:26:27,766 --> 01:26:29,939 - Except... - Except? 1840 01:26:30,227 --> 01:26:33,447 Except, you know, the mediation is tomorrow, 1841 01:26:33,605 --> 01:26:35,152 and I've been working my ass off on that. 1842 01:26:35,315 --> 01:26:36,942 Yeah, you've been working real hard on that. 1843 01:26:37,109 --> 01:26:38,952 And I wanna prove to myself and-and and to... um, people, 1844 01:26:41,029 --> 01:26:42,827 that, you know, that I can see that through. 1845 01:26:42,989 --> 01:26:44,411 - And you should. - Yeah. 1846 01:26:44,574 --> 01:26:45,746 You deserve that. 1847 01:26:45,909 --> 01:26:46,956 What are you saying? 1848 01:26:47,994 --> 01:26:49,621 We could wait. 1849 01:26:49,788 --> 01:26:51,631 - You wanna wait? - We could wait a day. 1850 01:26:51,790 --> 01:26:53,258 Push it a day? Or a week? 1851 01:26:53,417 --> 01:26:55,590 We should wait to switch. We can-we can do it, you know... 1852 01:26:55,752 --> 01:26:56,753 - A month? - Yeah. 1853 01:26:56,920 --> 01:26:57,887 It's time. 1854 01:26:57,963 --> 01:26:59,636 Really, really, what is time? 1855 01:26:59,798 --> 01:27:02,437 - Come 'ere, Dave. - Come on, buddy. 1856 01:27:02,968 --> 01:27:05,062 - This went so well. - Yeah, it did. 1857 01:27:05,429 --> 01:27:06,476 It's kinda surprising. 1858 01:27:06,638 --> 01:27:07,810 Very, very surprising. 1859 01:27:07,973 --> 01:27:12,149 If they offer you, I'm talkin', one red cent over 700 million dollars, 1860 01:27:12,310 --> 01:27:13,482 you accept that. Got it? 1861 01:27:13,812 --> 01:27:15,109 Yes, of course. Why wouldn't I? 1862 01:27:15,272 --> 01:27:16,273 Why wouldn't you? Okay. 1863 01:27:16,440 --> 01:27:17,783 - Great! - Good! 1864 01:27:17,941 --> 01:27:19,614 - What's the worst that can happen? - Nothing can happen! 1865 01:27:20,068 --> 01:27:21,240 I think it's fine. 1866 01:27:40,672 --> 01:27:41,764 Dave Lockwood. 1867 01:27:41,923 --> 01:27:43,095 Did you forget something? 1868 01:27:44,176 --> 01:27:46,645 - Who is this? - Your wife. 1869 01:27:46,803 --> 01:27:47,770 Oh. 1870 01:27:47,846 --> 01:27:51,771 Um. Did I forget something? I don't-I don't know. What? 1871 01:27:52,017 --> 01:27:53,109 Never mind. 1872 01:27:53,268 --> 01:27:56,363 I... It's the mediation tomorrow, so I'm under it. 1873 01:27:56,521 --> 01:27:57,818 I can't play. 1874 01:28:00,609 --> 01:28:02,703 So, how did it go? How much money is it? 1875 01:28:02,861 --> 01:28:05,114 Oh, just two hours, so, 14 bucks. 1876 01:28:05,280 --> 01:28:06,281 Great. 1877 01:28:07,199 --> 01:28:08,542 Sorry you got stood up. 1878 01:28:10,494 --> 01:28:11,837 He just forgot. 1879 01:28:12,204 --> 01:28:14,047 Yeah, that's what I meant. 1880 01:28:14,873 --> 01:28:17,376 He forgot me at the coffee shop 1881 01:28:17,542 --> 01:28:20,716 when all I wanted to do is go and talk to him. 1882 01:28:20,879 --> 01:28:23,507 Which isn't a lot to ask, do you think? 1883 01:28:23,673 --> 01:28:25,220 What do you want me to say? 1884 01:28:25,383 --> 01:28:27,226 Well, have you ever been stood up by a man? 1885 01:28:28,220 --> 01:28:29,642 - Not really. - Uh-huh. 1886 01:28:29,805 --> 01:28:31,853 Our parents drive us places, though, so... 1887 01:28:32,015 --> 01:28:33,232 Bottom line, Katie, 1888 01:28:33,391 --> 01:28:36,691 is... work always comes first, 1889 01:28:36,770 --> 01:28:38,238 and we always come second. 1890 01:28:38,396 --> 01:28:40,569 And I don't think that's ever gonna change. 1891 01:28:41,525 --> 01:28:42,993 I kinda gotta go home now 1892 01:28:43,068 --> 01:28:44,661 cause I have this Spanish test, so... 1893 01:28:44,820 --> 01:28:46,322 I can write you a note. 1894 01:28:46,488 --> 01:28:48,411 I... I guess deep down, 1895 01:28:48,490 --> 01:28:51,369 I'm afraid that I'll keep compromising 1896 01:28:51,535 --> 01:28:54,505 until getting the shit end feels normal. 1897 01:28:54,663 --> 01:28:57,086 And then I'll be so beaten down by life 1898 01:28:57,457 --> 01:29:01,087 that, just for a second, I will consider asking 1899 01:29:01,253 --> 01:29:04,177 the homeless guy at the car wash who looks like Kris Kristofferson 1900 01:29:04,339 --> 01:29:05,511 to rub my shoulders. 1901 01:29:05,674 --> 01:29:07,847 And I will, and he will. 1902 01:29:08,009 --> 01:29:10,182 And you know what? It'll be wonderful. 1903 01:29:11,054 --> 01:29:12,522 And I'll love it. 1904 01:29:12,681 --> 01:29:14,103 Because why not? 1905 01:29:14,266 --> 01:29:17,566 I mean, I'm not getting anything here. 1906 01:29:17,727 --> 01:29:19,855 Nobody's fucking me here. 1907 01:29:20,355 --> 01:29:24,201 You know, Katie, this is exactly why people get divorced. 1908 01:29:25,527 --> 01:29:27,279 I'm so sorry. 1909 01:29:27,445 --> 01:29:31,120 I'm so sorry. That was way out of line. 1910 01:29:34,578 --> 01:29:36,455 Do you want some ice cream? 1911 01:29:36,955 --> 01:29:39,799 I'm not getting any closer to leaving, am I? 1912 01:29:40,542 --> 01:29:41,543 No. 1913 01:29:55,599 --> 01:29:56,691 Wow! 1914 01:29:59,311 --> 01:30:00,437 It's looking good out there. 1915 01:30:00,604 --> 01:30:02,982 Hudson loves the sinker. He's been crushing them all year. 1916 01:30:03,148 --> 01:30:05,116 Listen to you, you are a big baseball fan! 1917 01:30:05,191 --> 01:30:06,238 Yeah, huge. 1918 01:30:06,318 --> 01:30:07,570 I-I didn't know that about you. 1919 01:30:07,736 --> 01:30:10,831 Ah, yeah, I was Phil Niekro for Halloween three years in a row as a kid. 1920 01:30:10,989 --> 01:30:13,833 No way! Phil Niekro is my number one favorite of all time! 1921 01:30:13,992 --> 01:30:15,414 Why is my voice so high? 1922 01:30:31,009 --> 01:30:32,181 Thank you for coming in today. 1923 01:30:32,344 --> 01:30:33,596 My name is Erin Walsh, 1924 01:30:33,678 --> 01:30:35,100 and I'll be mediating your claim. 1925 01:30:35,263 --> 01:30:38,767 Any and all agreements made during this mediation are binding 1926 01:30:38,934 --> 01:30:40,607 and carry with them the full rights 1927 01:30:40,685 --> 01:30:42,312 and responsibilities of the law 1928 01:30:42,479 --> 01:30:46,529 as stated in Federal Code 325 A, Section 4. 1929 01:30:50,111 --> 01:30:52,455 Kinkabe agrees in principle to the terms of the sale 1930 01:30:52,614 --> 01:30:55,993 and valuates your company at 625 million dollars. 1931 01:30:56,159 --> 01:30:57,877 This is their best and final offer. 1932 01:31:01,331 --> 01:31:03,550 There's no way we can make this deal. 1933 01:31:03,708 --> 01:31:05,836 Six-twenty-five is not the end of the world. 1934 01:31:06,002 --> 01:31:08,630 You just gotta know when it's time to quit. 1935 01:31:08,797 --> 01:31:11,050 Fuck that noise. We're not quitting. 1936 01:31:11,216 --> 01:31:13,059 I think you can do better, Ted. 1937 01:31:13,510 --> 01:31:14,511 I beg your pardon? 1938 01:31:14,678 --> 01:31:16,305 I don't see anybody headed for the door. 1939 01:31:16,805 --> 01:31:19,308 Listen to me. This is just like trying to fuck a Catholic girl who keeps saying 1940 01:31:19,474 --> 01:31:22,227 "No, no, no. I don't want to. I'm really really drunk and you're circumcised." 1941 01:31:22,394 --> 01:31:23,816 But she keeps on making out with you, 1942 01:31:23,895 --> 01:31:25,067 she's not leaving your Fiero... 1943 01:31:25,230 --> 01:31:26,447 It means she really wants to. 1944 01:31:26,773 --> 01:31:28,571 She just needs a little bit of a nudge, all right? 1945 01:31:28,650 --> 01:31:30,152 A little bit of a coax, little bit of a tickle. 1946 01:31:30,235 --> 01:31:31,862 Just to rationalize it to herself, to her God. 1947 01:31:31,945 --> 01:31:33,037 Do you know what I mean? 1948 01:31:34,906 --> 01:31:38,752 No, Dave. We most definitely do not know what you mean. 1949 01:31:38,910 --> 01:31:40,628 Okay. What I mean is... 1950 01:31:40,787 --> 01:31:43,381 they wanna spend more, they just don't know it, all right? 1951 01:31:43,540 --> 01:31:44,712 If this really was their final offer, 1952 01:31:44,833 --> 01:31:46,005 they'd be leaving, but they're not. 1953 01:31:46,084 --> 01:31:48,428 They're sticking around. They got more money to spend. 1954 01:31:50,088 --> 01:31:52,432 She wants to unroll that rubber at the bottom of her purse 1955 01:31:52,590 --> 01:31:54,592 that she put in there three semesters ago. 1956 01:31:58,555 --> 01:32:00,398 How much more do you think we can get out of them? 1957 01:32:01,391 --> 01:32:02,768 Ten million? Fifteen? 1958 01:32:03,101 --> 01:32:06,776 You pull those panties to the side, Ted, and you go ahead and you take a hundred more. 1959 01:32:07,105 --> 01:32:08,106 What? 1960 01:32:09,065 --> 01:32:12,285 Do not listen to him, Ted. He is beyond reckless. 1961 01:32:12,444 --> 01:32:15,994 If we make too large a counter-offer, we risk driving them away. 1962 01:32:16,156 --> 01:32:17,578 Ted, doesn't hurt to ask. 1963 01:32:18,199 --> 01:32:19,371 You would not believe the nasty shit 1964 01:32:19,451 --> 01:32:20,919 I get these girls to do, just by asking. 1965 01:32:20,994 --> 01:32:22,667 Honestly, it's revolting. 1966 01:32:24,998 --> 01:32:26,921 It does seem odd that they're not leaving. 1967 01:32:27,083 --> 01:32:28,585 Punch her in the seat. 1968 01:32:36,634 --> 01:32:39,353 You can tell Kinkabe we want an extra 100 million. 1969 01:32:39,512 --> 01:32:42,265 And that is our final offer, because we're leaving. 1970 01:32:42,432 --> 01:32:43,649 Fuel the jet, let's go. 1971 01:32:53,443 --> 01:32:55,912 For the record, I did not support that decision. 1972 01:32:55,987 --> 01:32:56,988 Sir! 1973 01:33:00,158 --> 01:33:03,287 Sir, Mr. Kinkabe has agreed to 725 million. 1974 01:33:03,453 --> 01:33:04,500 The deal is closed! 1975 01:33:06,122 --> 01:33:07,123 Oh, my God! 1976 01:33:13,171 --> 01:33:14,172 What did I tell you? 1977 01:33:33,525 --> 01:33:34,526 Oh, my God! 1978 01:33:35,527 --> 01:33:38,076 Oh, my God! 1979 01:33:38,279 --> 01:33:39,280 Wow. 1980 01:33:39,364 --> 01:33:40,536 You glad you came now? 1981 01:33:40,698 --> 01:33:42,951 Am I glad I came? It's like the greatest day of my life! 1982 01:33:44,327 --> 01:33:45,704 Whoa! Where did that come from? 1983 01:33:45,870 --> 01:33:48,589 Hang on, hang on, I got it. 1984 01:33:48,748 --> 01:33:50,921 Oh, no, they're gonna call it. 1985 01:33:52,043 --> 01:33:54,887 Oh, man, this is amazing. I can't believe they're making me partner. 1986 01:33:55,046 --> 01:33:56,548 Cause I'm, like, the greatest lawyer ever. 1987 01:33:56,714 --> 01:33:58,216 What a day. 1988 01:33:59,551 --> 01:34:01,394 So, now you can be happy. 1989 01:34:01,553 --> 01:34:02,725 Do you think they are gonna give me a medal? 1990 01:34:03,054 --> 01:34:05,022 Could you imagine an engraved sword? 1991 01:34:05,181 --> 01:34:07,434 Honestly, I'd be happy with anything engraved, you know. 1992 01:34:07,600 --> 01:34:09,728 A sword or... a spear. 1993 01:34:09,894 --> 01:34:11,066 Even a shield would be good. 1994 01:34:11,229 --> 01:34:14,358 Slap it, Cara. Cara. 1995 01:34:15,400 --> 01:34:16,697 We're gathered here tonight 1996 01:34:16,860 --> 01:34:20,205 to celebrate the newest partner in our esteemed firm. 1997 01:34:20,363 --> 01:34:22,491 David Andrew Lockwood 1998 01:34:22,574 --> 01:34:25,874 was born on March 25th, 1974. 1999 01:34:26,035 --> 01:34:28,379 By all accounts, Dave was a sweet, 2000 01:34:28,496 --> 01:34:30,874 diligent, hardworking little boy. 2001 01:34:36,087 --> 01:34:37,134 Wow. 2002 01:34:37,213 --> 01:34:38,635 Yeah, I know. 2003 01:34:38,798 --> 01:34:41,240 - I love it. - Why? 2004 01:34:42,302 --> 01:34:43,303 It reminds me of high school. 2005 01:34:43,469 --> 01:34:46,393 I feel like I'm about to lose my virginity. 2006 01:34:46,556 --> 01:34:47,603 Bathroom? 2007 01:34:47,765 --> 01:34:49,438 Um, yeah, right there. 2008 01:34:56,524 --> 01:34:58,026 Do you wanna... do you want a drink or something? 2009 01:34:58,193 --> 01:35:00,491 Or warm clothes or I can get you a drink? 2010 01:35:00,653 --> 01:35:02,030 No, it's okay. We'll have one after. 2011 01:35:03,281 --> 01:35:05,784 Okay. After... after what? 2012 01:35:06,075 --> 01:35:09,045 Relax, Mitch, you're gonna get laid tonight. 2013 01:35:09,621 --> 01:35:13,967 In high school, Dave graduated first in his class. 2014 01:35:14,125 --> 01:35:17,129 After winning a full scholarship to Princeton, 2015 01:35:17,295 --> 01:35:21,516 Dave, amazingly, graduated in just three years. 2016 01:35:22,508 --> 01:35:26,229 And after graduating from Yale Law School with honors, 2017 01:35:26,679 --> 01:35:28,977 Dave clerked for Justice Souter 2018 01:35:29,140 --> 01:35:31,438 on the United States Supreme Court. 2019 01:35:34,771 --> 01:35:35,988 Work is hard. 2020 01:35:36,147 --> 01:35:38,400 I like going to baseball games 2021 01:35:38,566 --> 01:35:41,490 and drinking too much, and getting tattoos at 3:00 in the morning. 2022 01:35:42,278 --> 01:35:43,325 Yeah. 2023 01:35:43,488 --> 01:35:46,287 Boot. Take it off. 2024 01:35:49,994 --> 01:35:53,464 We were not put on this earth to work, breed and die. 2025 01:35:53,623 --> 01:35:55,375 - No, we were not... - Don't interrupt me, handsome. 2026 01:35:56,376 --> 01:35:59,095 We are here to have fun. 2027 01:35:59,337 --> 01:36:01,180 - Right? - Yeah. 2028 01:36:03,383 --> 01:36:04,384 Boot. 2029 01:36:07,971 --> 01:36:10,394 I just think there's too many rules. 2030 01:36:11,557 --> 01:36:14,811 Think about all the amazing experiences that we miss out on 2031 01:36:14,978 --> 01:36:17,401 because we're so worried about what other people will think. 2032 01:36:18,064 --> 01:36:21,785 Why can't I be a professional, successful woman 2033 01:36:21,943 --> 01:36:24,867 who sleeps with someone she just met? 2034 01:36:25,321 --> 01:36:26,618 You know? 2035 01:36:26,781 --> 01:36:28,124 I haven't heard a word you said 2036 01:36:28,199 --> 01:36:29,826 since you took your pants off. 2037 01:36:30,285 --> 01:36:31,286 Shirt. 2038 01:36:32,704 --> 01:36:33,705 Shirt. 2039 01:36:36,833 --> 01:36:37,834 You smell like lemon. 2040 01:36:38,918 --> 01:36:41,263 - I do smell like lemon. - Yeah. 2041 01:36:41,421 --> 01:36:43,844 Oh, God, you're nervous. I like that. 2042 01:36:45,591 --> 01:36:46,888 Your leg is shaking. 2043 01:36:47,051 --> 01:36:48,098 That's not my leg. 2044 01:36:48,636 --> 01:36:50,559 Take off my bra. 2045 01:36:50,722 --> 01:36:51,723 All of it? 2046 01:36:51,889 --> 01:36:53,357 Just the parts covering the breasts. 2047 01:36:53,516 --> 01:36:55,268 That's a good start. 2048 01:37:00,982 --> 01:37:02,655 Oh, that's great. 2049 01:37:03,860 --> 01:37:04,861 At the end of the day... 2050 01:37:05,028 --> 01:37:06,029 Holy shit! 2051 01:37:06,195 --> 01:37:08,664 ...I am just tired of over-thinking things. 2052 01:37:09,240 --> 01:37:10,833 I'm tired of over-thinking things, too. 2053 01:37:10,992 --> 01:37:13,120 We should just do what we wanna do. 2054 01:37:13,286 --> 01:37:14,663 Let's do it. Let's just do it. 2055 01:37:14,746 --> 01:37:17,920 The only thing Dave loves more than the law 2056 01:37:18,041 --> 01:37:20,840 is his beautiful wife, Jamie. 2057 01:37:21,377 --> 01:37:23,755 Their life is like a fairy tale 2058 01:37:23,921 --> 01:37:27,300 made even more perfect by their three adorable children. 2059 01:37:27,550 --> 01:37:30,554 So, as we celebrate one partnership tonight... 2060 01:37:41,064 --> 01:37:42,907 Look, daddy, it's you and me. 2061 01:37:54,869 --> 01:37:57,622 ...would bring most men to their knees, 2062 01:37:57,789 --> 01:37:59,132 but not Dave. 2063 01:37:59,707 --> 01:38:01,801 He excelled on all fronts, 2064 01:38:01,959 --> 01:38:03,586 putting the rest of us to shame. 2065 01:38:04,712 --> 01:38:05,713 I didn't earn this. 2066 01:38:05,880 --> 01:38:10,101 The law may be the first thing on Dave's mind, 2067 01:38:10,259 --> 01:38:14,639 but his family has always been the first thing in his heart. 2068 01:38:16,057 --> 01:38:17,650 What should we do with each other, Mitch? 2069 01:38:17,809 --> 01:38:19,106 Oh, God, everything. 2070 01:38:20,436 --> 01:38:21,779 We could, uh... 2071 01:38:25,108 --> 01:38:26,109 Is that a... 2072 01:38:37,328 --> 01:38:39,171 Is that a many-spotted skipperling? 2073 01:38:39,580 --> 01:38:40,581 Yeah. 2074 01:38:45,628 --> 01:38:46,754 Mm. 2075 01:38:47,672 --> 01:38:50,346 You can have whatever you want. 2076 01:38:54,303 --> 01:38:55,520 What do you wanna do? 2077 01:38:58,516 --> 01:39:00,018 I wanna go home. 2078 01:39:01,686 --> 01:39:02,687 What? 2079 01:39:04,188 --> 01:39:05,735 I wanna go home. 2080 01:39:07,358 --> 01:39:08,701 What? I don't... 2081 01:39:09,360 --> 01:39:10,862 I got a meeting. I gotta go. 2082 01:39:16,909 --> 01:39:17,910 Lockwood residence. 2083 01:39:18,035 --> 01:39:19,036 Where is Dave? 2084 01:39:19,203 --> 01:39:21,251 Dave is at the country club. They made him partner. 2085 01:39:28,045 --> 01:39:30,468 A brilliant attorney, 2086 01:39:30,590 --> 01:39:31,887 loving husband, 2087 01:39:32,049 --> 01:39:34,051 devoted father. 2088 01:39:36,554 --> 01:39:39,103 It is my distinct honor 2089 01:39:39,223 --> 01:39:40,770 to introduce to you, 2090 01:39:41,100 --> 01:39:44,195 our newest partner, David Lockwood. 2091 01:39:55,781 --> 01:39:57,283 Way to go, Dave. 2092 01:39:59,702 --> 01:40:01,124 Congratulations, Dave. 2093 01:40:01,370 --> 01:40:03,088 You deserve it. 2094 01:40:03,956 --> 01:40:05,754 This is not my life. 2095 01:40:34,570 --> 01:40:35,992 Is she kissing the wrong guy? 2096 01:40:36,280 --> 01:40:38,123 I know it's weird. Just go with it. 2097 01:41:00,304 --> 01:41:01,476 We tried to tell you. 2098 01:41:01,931 --> 01:41:04,509 - You ready to take a piss? - You bet your ass I am. 2099 01:41:05,017 --> 01:41:06,018 I love you, pumpkin. 2100 01:41:28,708 --> 01:41:29,960 Are you sure this is the address? 2101 01:41:30,209 --> 01:41:31,677 Yeah, this is the place. 2102 01:41:45,391 --> 01:41:47,359 - You gotta be kidding me. - Oh, wow. 2103 01:41:51,022 --> 01:41:52,899 Jesus Christ, it's like the whole city is in here tonight. 2104 01:41:53,065 --> 01:41:56,194 Okay, let's just do this. Come on. 2105 01:42:03,909 --> 01:42:05,035 How are we supposed to get this done? 2106 01:42:05,202 --> 01:42:07,250 You just be super cool... 2107 01:42:07,413 --> 01:42:09,040 and don't draw attention to yourself. 2108 01:42:13,044 --> 01:42:14,091 Why aren't you peeing? 2109 01:42:14,253 --> 01:42:15,379 I got a lot of people around me. 2110 01:42:15,546 --> 01:42:16,718 Don't yell at me. I'm all locked up. 2111 01:42:16,881 --> 01:42:18,224 No one's even looking at us. We're fine. 2112 01:42:18,382 --> 01:42:22,387 Mommy, that man is peeing in the fountain! 2113 01:42:25,222 --> 01:42:26,394 Oh, my God. 2114 01:42:26,557 --> 01:42:28,309 Okay. Cat's out of the bag, buddy. You gotta go now. 2115 01:42:28,392 --> 01:42:29,393 - Why don't you take a picture? - Mitch! 2116 01:42:29,477 --> 01:42:30,478 Come on! 2117 01:42:30,561 --> 01:42:32,563 - Well, it's snipped. - Mitch! Mitch! 2118 01:42:32,730 --> 01:42:36,917 By the way, why didn't you invite me to your anniversary party? Huh? 2119 01:42:39,111 --> 01:42:41,489 Okay, look... 2120 01:42:42,406 --> 01:42:43,703 I feel really bad about that 2121 01:42:43,783 --> 01:42:45,126 but can we talk about that at another time? 2122 01:42:45,284 --> 01:42:46,661 There's a girl scout staring at my penis. 2123 01:42:46,827 --> 01:42:48,249 I wanna talk about it right now. 2124 01:42:48,412 --> 01:42:49,413 Really? 2125 01:42:49,747 --> 01:42:51,420 Are you embarrassed of me? 2126 01:42:52,124 --> 01:42:55,970 I'm sorry. Yeah. Yeah, I was. 2127 01:42:56,587 --> 01:42:57,964 But I'm not any more. 2128 01:42:59,423 --> 01:43:01,141 I'm actually proud of you, Mitch. 2129 01:43:02,968 --> 01:43:04,015 Really? 2130 01:43:04,762 --> 01:43:05,934 Really. 2131 01:43:10,309 --> 01:43:11,481 Attaboy! 2132 01:43:11,644 --> 01:43:13,146 I think that was it. I think that's what had me all locked up. 2133 01:43:13,312 --> 01:43:14,313 Hey! 2134 01:43:15,481 --> 01:43:17,324 Shit, okay, we got security on us. 2135 01:43:17,400 --> 01:43:18,617 Now, we gotta do this right now. 2136 01:43:18,776 --> 01:43:20,278 Three, two, one... 2137 01:43:20,444 --> 01:43:21,821 I wish I had my old life back! 2138 01:43:21,987 --> 01:43:22,988 What did they say? 2139 01:43:23,447 --> 01:43:25,870 - Do you feel any different? - No, go again, go again. 2140 01:43:26,033 --> 01:43:28,502 I wish I had my old life back! 2141 01:43:29,704 --> 01:43:31,377 - Oh, shit! - Come on, guy! 2142 01:43:31,539 --> 01:43:33,712 We are running out of time here. Three, two, one... 2143 01:43:33,874 --> 01:43:35,876 I wish I had my old life back! 2144 01:43:36,460 --> 01:43:39,213 - Bingo! - Nice! Let's go, this way! 2145 01:43:39,380 --> 01:43:40,848 I'm peeing all over people, slow down! 2146 01:43:41,006 --> 01:43:42,223 Watch it! 2147 01:43:42,341 --> 01:43:43,558 Excuse me, I'm sorry. Pardon me. 2148 01:44:12,705 --> 01:44:13,706 Oh, my God. 2149 01:44:17,585 --> 01:44:19,383 Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. 2150 01:44:20,212 --> 01:44:23,307 Oh, thank God. Oh, thank God. 2151 01:44:23,382 --> 01:44:25,430 Pumpkin! Pumpkin, I'm back. 2152 01:44:25,593 --> 01:44:27,872 Pumpkin, wake up. Wake up. 2153 01:44:28,012 --> 01:44:30,265 Can you wake up, baby? I'm back, I'm back. 2154 01:44:30,431 --> 01:44:33,355 Oh, my God, I missed you so much. Oh, honey. 2155 01:44:33,517 --> 01:44:35,440 Okay, I owe you an explanation for last night. 2156 01:44:35,603 --> 01:44:37,697 I owe you an apology for this week. 2157 01:44:38,272 --> 01:44:41,071 And most importantly, I owe you a fix for the last five years. 2158 01:44:41,233 --> 01:44:42,951 Honey, things are changing, I promise. 2159 01:44:43,360 --> 01:44:47,115 Okay? You and the kids mean everything to me. Nothing is more important. 2160 01:44:47,281 --> 01:44:49,204 In fact, you know what I'm doin'? I'm gonna quit my job. 2161 01:44:49,366 --> 01:44:51,539 Yeah. I'm going to work today, I'm gonna quit my job. 2162 01:44:51,702 --> 01:44:55,206 I'm going to apply to... um, Kinko's, all right? 2163 01:44:55,372 --> 01:44:57,716 - Or maybe Chick-fil-A or Waffle House? - Whoa, whoa, whoa! 2164 01:44:57,875 --> 01:44:59,548 - Hold on, just a second. - Foot Locker? 2165 01:44:59,710 --> 01:45:02,213 It is the middle of the night. Shh. 2166 01:45:03,547 --> 01:45:07,723 All right, I don't know what's going on with you two dorks. 2167 01:45:08,052 --> 01:45:09,429 That's enough. 2168 01:45:10,304 --> 01:45:11,726 I don't want you to quit your job. 2169 01:45:11,806 --> 01:45:13,103 What are you talking about? 2170 01:45:13,265 --> 01:45:16,895 You love your job and you love the law. 2171 01:45:17,269 --> 01:45:19,271 I love that about you. 2172 01:45:20,231 --> 01:45:21,778 I just want you to come home for dinner. 2173 01:45:21,941 --> 01:45:23,909 - I know. - And Dialogue Night. 2174 01:45:24,401 --> 01:45:25,994 And to see the kids. 2175 01:45:28,072 --> 01:45:29,995 And I want you to want to be here. 2176 01:45:30,157 --> 01:45:32,910 I do. You have no idea. 2177 01:45:35,329 --> 01:45:37,252 You don't have to get all, like, 2178 01:45:37,331 --> 01:45:38,753 "I'm gonna quit my job". 2179 01:45:42,461 --> 01:45:44,179 - It's my turn. - No, no, no, no, no. 2180 01:45:44,338 --> 01:45:45,806 Back to bed. They're mine. 2181 01:45:47,967 --> 01:45:51,101 - I love you. - I love you. 2182 01:45:53,848 --> 01:45:55,100 Hi! 2183 01:45:55,933 --> 01:45:57,776 Look who's up. 2184 01:45:57,935 --> 01:45:59,312 Good morning. 2185 01:45:59,478 --> 01:46:01,276 Hi, my little man. 2186 01:46:04,024 --> 01:46:06,823 And how are you this morning, little princess? 2187 01:46:07,778 --> 01:46:09,280 Good morning. 2188 01:46:10,114 --> 01:46:13,332 How was your sleep? Yeah, I know. 2189 01:46:13,450 --> 01:46:14,667 Okay, she's first. 2190 01:46:14,827 --> 01:46:16,670 She's a little bit more vocal. 2191 01:46:16,829 --> 01:46:17,830 Right? 2192 01:46:18,205 --> 01:46:21,382 Are you trying to tell me you got a little surprise? Huh? 2193 01:46:21,458 --> 01:46:23,005 Did you make me something special? 2194 01:46:23,168 --> 01:46:24,169 Daddy. 2195 01:46:24,628 --> 01:46:27,973 Hi, sugarbug, come here. 2196 01:46:29,884 --> 01:46:31,511 Give me a hug, sweetie. 2197 01:46:32,469 --> 01:46:33,641 Good morning. 2198 01:46:34,889 --> 01:46:36,891 You smell like a pillow. 2199 01:46:37,057 --> 01:46:40,186 All right. Stay here, talk to me. You can sit on that chair. 2200 01:46:40,352 --> 01:46:41,399 Tell me about school. 2201 01:46:41,478 --> 01:46:43,321 I wanna know what you learned yesterday, okay? 2202 01:46:43,480 --> 01:46:44,823 And I wanna hear everything. 2203 01:46:45,316 --> 01:46:49,162 Did you know that atoms are smaller than a grain of sand? 2204 01:46:49,320 --> 01:46:50,742 How amazing is that? 2205 01:46:50,905 --> 01:46:51,906 So amazing! 2206 01:46:52,072 --> 01:46:55,201 And everything on this planet is made out of atoms. 2207 01:46:55,367 --> 01:46:57,836 Which... is kind of strange 2208 01:46:57,995 --> 01:47:01,044 because I think that means that I'm the same as a piece of fruit 2209 01:47:01,206 --> 01:47:02,503 or a fish 2210 01:47:02,666 --> 01:47:04,168 or this chair! 2211 01:47:26,649 --> 01:47:29,823 I'm me. Oh, God, I'm me. Thank you. Thank you. 2212 01:47:29,985 --> 01:47:32,283 God, look at that. Oh! Gorgeous! 2213 01:47:32,738 --> 01:47:34,365 Oh, God, it's so good to be back! 2214 01:47:34,740 --> 01:47:35,832 Oh, yeah. 2215 01:47:35,991 --> 01:47:37,038 Welcome home. I missed you. 2216 01:47:37,201 --> 01:47:40,626 Oh, God, look at that, two perfectly shorn balls. 2217 01:47:49,171 --> 01:47:50,172 Hi. 2218 01:47:53,008 --> 01:47:55,431 I left my purse, so... I would have called but... 2219 01:47:55,594 --> 01:47:57,187 But you left your phone in your purse. 2220 01:47:57,346 --> 01:47:59,314 - Yeah. - Right. 2221 01:47:59,473 --> 01:48:03,023 Listen, I just wanted to apologize, because I know 2222 01:48:03,185 --> 01:48:07,190 that I probably came off a little aggressive last night, 2223 01:48:07,356 --> 01:48:09,450 and I-I just wanted to say sorry. 2224 01:48:11,735 --> 01:48:12,736 No. 2225 01:48:12,903 --> 01:48:15,076 Don't apologize. I-I apologize. 2226 01:48:15,239 --> 01:48:17,287 I-I probably came off a little gay last night. 2227 01:48:17,950 --> 01:48:21,045 I hope you will allow me the opportunity to straighten things out for you. 2228 01:48:21,203 --> 01:48:23,581 Hey, guess what? It's breakfast time. 2229 01:48:23,747 --> 01:48:24,748 Wanna get some breakfast? 2230 01:48:26,083 --> 01:48:27,084 Yeah. 2231 01:48:31,005 --> 01:48:33,599 Dearly beloved, we are gathered here in the sight of God 2232 01:48:33,757 --> 01:48:36,180 to unite this man and this woman in the... 2233 01:48:44,768 --> 01:48:46,645 Mitch, you came. 2234 01:48:46,812 --> 01:48:48,314 I'm very, very touched. Thank you. 2235 01:48:48,564 --> 01:48:49,565 You're welcome, dad. 2236 01:48:50,607 --> 01:48:51,608 Ooh! 2237 01:48:51,692 --> 01:48:53,660 Fuck me! This must be my new mom. 2238 01:48:53,819 --> 01:48:55,287 Hi, Mitch Planko. 2239 01:48:55,446 --> 01:48:57,039 Good. Thank you. 2240 01:48:57,197 --> 01:48:58,414 She's holding onto me. 2241 01:48:58,490 --> 01:49:00,208 Okay, good, let go. 2242 01:49:00,367 --> 01:49:02,836 Keep away from him. The man's a pervert. 2243 01:49:07,958 --> 01:49:11,508 Happy anniversary, Jamie and Dave! 2244 01:49:16,467 --> 01:49:18,469 For those of you who don't know me, my name is Mitch Planko. 2245 01:49:18,635 --> 01:49:21,013 I was that nut sack's best man 10 years ago. 2246 01:49:21,096 --> 01:49:22,097 Here we go. 2247 01:49:22,181 --> 01:49:26,231 You know, when we were kids, Dave and I, we, uh, we had a lot of big plans. 2248 01:49:26,393 --> 01:49:28,771 Dave, he.. he was gonna be an astronaut, 2249 01:49:28,937 --> 01:49:32,987 and I-I was gonna sell dolphins on the black market. 2250 01:49:33,150 --> 01:49:34,242 Astronaut! 2251 01:49:34,651 --> 01:49:36,870 There's a reason I'm not selling dolphins. 2252 01:49:37,279 --> 01:49:40,032 We live in Atlanta, they're tough to find. 2253 01:49:40,199 --> 01:49:43,248 And... those things, they don't sleep, 2254 01:49:43,410 --> 01:49:45,208 which also makes it real hard to catch 'em. 2255 01:49:46,371 --> 01:49:47,434 But I think that we all know 2256 01:49:47,434 --> 01:49:52,466 that, uh, that life doesn't always turn out exactly how you plan it. 2257 01:49:52,711 --> 01:49:54,463 Sometimes, 2258 01:49:54,630 --> 01:49:56,177 just sometimes, 2259 01:49:56,340 --> 01:49:57,683 it turns out better. 2260 01:49:58,425 --> 01:49:59,768 You know, Dave, I think there's a reason 2261 01:49:59,843 --> 01:50:01,845 that-that you're not walking on the moon right now. 2262 01:50:02,304 --> 01:50:04,602 Cause you belong here, 2263 01:50:05,432 --> 01:50:07,025 in your life, 2264 01:50:07,184 --> 01:50:09,357 with that incredible woman sitting beside you. 2265 01:50:14,149 --> 01:50:17,528 Can we please raise our kamikaze shots 2266 01:50:17,611 --> 01:50:19,158 to my two best friends, please? 2267 01:50:20,697 --> 01:50:21,698 To Dave and Jamie. 2268 01:50:21,865 --> 01:50:23,708 Dave and Jamie! 2269 01:50:23,867 --> 01:50:25,210 Happy anniversary. 2270 01:50:25,369 --> 01:50:27,622 Happy anniversary! 2271 01:50:31,375 --> 01:50:33,377 - How did I do? - You're such a poet. 2272 01:50:33,544 --> 01:50:35,217 - You're Robert Frost. - Who? 2273 01:50:35,379 --> 01:50:36,972 It doesn't matter. God, you're good looking. 2274 01:50:37,047 --> 01:50:38,048 Yeah. 2275 01:50:38,132 --> 01:50:39,805 - All right. I'm gonna meet you in five minutes. - All right. 2276 01:50:39,967 --> 01:50:41,014 Okay. 2277 01:50:42,636 --> 01:50:43,888 I took care of you guys, huh? 2278 01:50:45,055 --> 01:50:46,056 We love you. 2279 01:50:46,557 --> 01:50:47,774 Oh... 2280 01:50:48,058 --> 01:50:49,310 Come on. Really? 2281 01:50:50,727 --> 01:50:52,525 Hey, hey, buddy. I love you. 2282 01:50:52,688 --> 01:50:53,985 I love you, man. 2283 01:50:55,566 --> 01:50:57,489 How are things going at home? Good? 2284 01:50:57,497 --> 01:51:00,575 Oh, yeah, yeah. I mean, come on. 2285 01:51:00,737 --> 01:51:03,866 Yeah. Yeah, it's-it's great. It's fantastic. 2286 01:51:04,032 --> 01:51:05,249 - Good. - Yeah. 2287 01:51:05,409 --> 01:51:06,911 What about you? What about Sabrina? 2288 01:51:07,369 --> 01:51:08,220 - Good. - Yeah? 2289 01:51:08,220 --> 01:51:11,141 It's good. We're taking things slow, but it's good. 2290 01:51:16,003 --> 01:51:17,596 Is it weird that I miss your penis? 2291 01:51:18,088 --> 01:51:20,341 Come on. It would be weird if you didn't. 2292 01:51:55,042 --> 01:51:59,734 - What are we doing here? - Well, we're doing... this. 2293 01:52:00,547 --> 01:52:01,645 Huh? 2294 01:52:02,007 --> 01:52:04,101 A little treat from uncle Mitch. 2295 01:52:04,176 --> 01:52:06,643 Do you remember how to do this? Hm? 2296 01:52:07,789 --> 01:52:08,805 Okay. 2297 01:52:10,432 --> 01:52:11,649 Oh. 2298 01:52:17,064 --> 01:52:18,316 - I know. - Mm. 2299 01:52:24,696 --> 01:52:26,243 It's fun, though, right? 2300 01:52:29,300 --> 01:52:30,661 - Yay! - Let's go. Let's go look at some fish. 2301 01:52:30,744 --> 01:52:31,791 Okay. 2302 01:52:32,329 --> 01:52:33,751 Oh, God! 2303 01:52:37,084 --> 01:52:38,552 Oh, my God! 2304 01:52:38,627 --> 01:52:40,254 - Ow! What the hell was that? - Oh. 2305 01:52:40,337 --> 01:52:41,634 Explain yourself! 2306 01:52:42,297 --> 01:52:43,924 Well, you never heard of the Bryant Gumbel? 2307 01:52:45,509 --> 01:52:46,681 Let's do that again. 2308 01:52:56,353 --> 01:52:57,696 Why? 2309 01:53:05,529 --> 01:53:08,658 - Mitch sent us a video. - Yeah? That's weird. 2310 01:53:16,581 --> 01:53:17,958 No entry! 2311 01:53:24,201 --> 01:53:27,475 Ah, Steve Driver, you perfect bastard, you! 2312 01:53:30,929 --> 01:53:32,021 Oh, no. 2313 01:53:32,723 --> 01:53:36,648 Oh, Steve, it's like Christmas in my ass! 2314 01:53:36,727 --> 01:53:38,104 What are you doing with my wife, man? 2315 01:53:38,228 --> 01:53:40,447 - Dimitri? - Hey, join the fuck party. 2316 01:53:40,522 --> 01:53:43,401 - Let's make lady sandwich. - Okay. 2317 01:53:44,860 --> 01:53:47,363 - Oh, my God. - Not very well made, huh? 2318 01:53:47,904 --> 01:53:50,828 When was that shot? - Who knows? Probably years ago. 2319 01:53:52,617 --> 01:53:55,962 "Thank you for covering me last week. Love what you did with my hair." 2320 01:53:56,038 --> 01:53:57,130 Hey! 2321 01:54:00,792 --> 01:54:02,294 You got with a man? 2322 01:54:04,129 --> 01:54:07,258 Dimitri was surprisingly gentle, and we were very safe. 2323 01:54:07,591 --> 01:54:08,558 Uh-huh. 2324 01:54:08,633 --> 01:54:10,135 He smelt a little like lamb, though. 2325 01:54:10,552 --> 01:54:13,726 - That pooper shot looked real. - No. God, please, don't! 2326 01:54:13,805 --> 01:54:15,557 - It did. - Oh, God. 2327 01:54:15,640 --> 01:54:17,108 - Dave? - What? 2328 01:54:17,726 --> 01:54:20,869 - Can you change my oil? - No, I can't. 2329 01:54:21,104 --> 01:54:23,323 I'm gonna cut my thumbs off tomorrow, I swear to God. 2330 01:54:23,398 --> 01:54:25,377 And we're gonna destroy that thing first thing in the morning. 2331 01:54:25,377 --> 01:54:26,974 - Uh-huh. - Okay? 2332 01:54:26,974 --> 01:54:28,470 I don't want you to. I like it. 2333 01:54:28,470 --> 01:54:32,328 - Hey, hey! - Oh! It's growing in so nicely. 2334 01:54:32,407 --> 01:54:35,786 Yeah. Real in-between phase. 2335 01:54:36,328 --> 01:54:38,296 It's like Sonny Crockett down there. 172324