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1
00:00:06,941 --> 00:00:08,109
MAIL'S HERE.
2
00:00:08,142 --> 00:00:09,544
AH, THE MAIL.
3
00:00:09,578 --> 00:00:12,313
WHAT WOULD A DAY
ON EARTH BE LIKE
WITHOUT THE MAIL?
4
00:00:12,346 --> 00:00:13,682
PROBABLY A LOT
LIKE SUNDAY.
5
00:00:13,715 --> 00:00:15,149
AH! HA HA.
6
00:00:15,183 --> 00:00:16,585
"SALLY SOLOMON,
7
00:00:16,618 --> 00:00:19,320
"YOU HAVE BEEN PREAPPROVED
FOR A PLATINUM CREDIT CARD.
8
00:00:19,353 --> 00:00:24,258
ONLY OUR MOST VALUED AND
CHERISHED CUSTOMERS QUALIFY
FOR PLATINUM STATUS."
9
00:00:24,292 --> 00:00:26,360
YOU GUYS, I QUALIFY
FOR PLATINUM STATUS!
10
00:00:26,394 --> 00:00:28,830
SO DID I!
ME TOO!
11
00:00:28,863 --> 00:00:29,931
HELLO, FAMILY.
12
00:00:29,964 --> 00:00:31,099
HEY, MAIL'S HERE.
13
00:00:31,132 --> 00:00:32,734
AH, THE MAIL.
14
00:00:32,767 --> 00:00:36,571
WHAT WOULD A DAY
ON EARTH BE LIKE
WITHOUT THE MAIL?
15
00:00:36,605 --> 00:00:39,774
PROBABLY A LOT
LIKE SUNDAY.
16
00:00:39,808 --> 00:00:40,809
YOU KNOW, THAT'S
VERY CLEVER. HARRY.
17
00:00:40,842 --> 00:00:42,410
UH, WAIT. I SAID THAT.
18
00:00:42,443 --> 00:00:44,278
OH, REALLY?
19
00:00:44,312 --> 00:00:47,248
HOW SAD.
20
00:00:47,281 --> 00:00:50,551
OH, THIS ONE'S ADDRESSED
TO "MR. RICHARD SOLOMON."
21
00:00:50,585 --> 00:00:53,187
MY, HOW FORMAL.
22
00:00:53,221 --> 00:00:54,322
"DEAREST RICHARD,
23
00:00:54,355 --> 00:00:56,658
"I HOPE WITH ALL OF MY HEART
THAT THIS LETTER FINDS YOU.
24
00:00:56,691 --> 00:00:59,293
"TOO MANY YEARS
HAVE GONE BY.
WE MISS YOU GREATLY.
25
00:00:59,327 --> 00:01:01,996
"PLEASE COME TO THE SOLOMON
FAMILY REUNION THIS YEAR.
26
00:01:02,030 --> 00:01:04,565
ALL OF MY LOVE,
AUNT FLORENCE."
27
00:01:04,599 --> 00:01:05,934
DICK, YOU NEVER
TOLD US
28
00:01:05,967 --> 00:01:07,301
YOU HAD
AN AUNT FLORENCE.
29
00:01:07,335 --> 00:01:08,502
HE DOESN'T, YOU MOOK.
30
00:01:08,536 --> 00:01:09,938
THAT LETTER WAS
OBVIOUSLY MEANT
31
00:01:09,971 --> 00:01:11,105
FOR SOME OTHER
DICK SOLOMON.
32
00:01:11,139 --> 00:01:13,141
WELL, I'LL JUST CALL UP
THIS AUNT FLORENCE
33
00:01:13,174 --> 00:01:14,809
AND SET HER STRAIGHT.
34
00:01:14,843 --> 00:01:16,444
GREAT SCOTT!
35
00:01:16,477 --> 00:01:18,713
I'VE QUALIFIED FOR
PLATINUM STATUS!
36
00:01:56,918 --> 00:01:59,587
YES, HELLO.
IS THIS FLORENCE SOLOMON?
37
00:01:59,620 --> 00:02:01,690
HI, MY NAME IS DICK SOLOMON.
38
00:02:01,723 --> 00:02:07,328
I-I'VE GOT THIS, UH,
INVITATION TO A FAMILY
REUNION, AND I--
39
00:02:07,361 --> 00:02:11,800
WELL, YES, IT'S NICE TO HEAR
YOUR VOICE, TOO, BUT--
40
00:02:11,833 --> 00:02:14,602
YES, I AM AS ADORABLE
AS I ALWAYS WAS.
41
00:02:17,071 --> 00:02:19,007
HAS IT REALLY BEEN 43 YEARS?
42
00:02:21,642 --> 00:02:24,345
THEN, IF I DID TURN UP,
43
00:02:24,378 --> 00:02:28,216
YOU PROBABLY WOULDN'T EVEN
RECOGNIZE ME, HUH?
44
00:02:28,249 --> 00:02:29,583
THAT'S--
45
00:02:29,617 --> 00:02:34,488
YES, IT WOULD BE WONDERFUL
TO SEE THE FAMILY AGAIN,
AUNT FLORENCE.
46
00:02:34,522 --> 00:02:36,624
I LOVE YOU, TOO.
47
00:02:36,657 --> 00:02:37,892
YES...
48
00:02:37,926 --> 00:02:39,327
YES. BYE-BYE.
49
00:02:40,895 --> 00:02:43,164
I HAVE
AN AUNT FLORENCE.
50
00:02:43,197 --> 00:02:44,132
WHAT?
51
00:02:44,165 --> 00:02:46,768
WHAT? OH, THAT WAS
AUNT FLORENCE
IN INDIANA.
52
00:02:46,801 --> 00:02:49,303
SINCE WHEN DO YOU HAVE
AN AUNT FLORENCE IN INDIANA?
53
00:02:49,337 --> 00:02:52,106
SINCE WHEN DO YOU HAVE
AN AUNT FLORENCE
IN INDIANA?
54
00:02:52,140 --> 00:02:52,807
I DON'T.
55
00:02:52,841 --> 00:02:54,308
SO WHERE'S THE BIG
COINCIDENCE?
56
00:02:54,342 --> 00:02:57,946
YOU KNOW, SOMETIMES,
NINA, YOU MAKE NO SENSE.
57
00:02:57,979 --> 00:02:58,847
ARE YOU GONNA
VISIT HER?
58
00:02:58,880 --> 00:03:00,782
WE HAVE A FAMILY REUNION
THIS WEEKEND.
59
00:03:00,815 --> 00:03:03,484
IT SOUNDS LIKE IT'S GONNA BE
WONDERFUL. YOU WANNA COME?
60
00:03:03,517 --> 00:03:04,753
ARE YOU SURE
IT'S ALL RIGHT?
61
00:03:04,786 --> 00:03:06,154
WELL, OF COURSE
IT'S ALL RIGHT.
62
00:03:06,187 --> 00:03:07,221
OH, DICK, IT'S FAMILY, I--
63
00:03:07,255 --> 00:03:08,823
NO, DON'T WORRY,
MARY.
64
00:03:08,857 --> 00:03:10,458
I'M SURE YOU'LL FIND
MY FAMILY
65
00:03:10,491 --> 00:03:13,027
TO BE WARM
AND NURTURING.
66
00:03:13,061 --> 00:03:14,162
IT WON'T BEAR
ANY RESEMBLANCE
67
00:03:14,195 --> 00:03:17,065
TO THE LIQUOR-DRENCHED
ORGY OF HATRED
AND RECRIMINATION
68
00:03:17,098 --> 00:03:20,201
THAT MARKS EVERY
ALBRIGHT GET-TOGETHER.
69
00:03:26,307 --> 00:03:28,910
SALLY, WE'RE NOT SPENDING
THE WHOLE WINTER
AT THIS REUNION.
70
00:03:28,943 --> 00:03:30,812
BACK OFF, ALL RIGHT?
I'M NOT LIKE YOU GUYS.
71
00:03:30,845 --> 00:03:33,714
I CAN'T JUST THROW IN
A TOOTHBRUSH AND
A PAIR OF UNDERWEAR
72
00:03:33,748 --> 00:03:36,617
AND BE SET FOR THE WEEKEND.
73
00:03:36,650 --> 00:03:38,319
UNDERWEAR!
74
00:03:41,923 --> 00:03:44,625
WELL, IS EVERYBODY
READY TO GO TO
OUR FAMILY REUNION?
75
00:03:44,658 --> 00:03:47,295
DICK, THIS IS NOT
OUR FAMILY.
76
00:03:47,328 --> 00:03:48,863
YEAH, WHAT IF THEY
START ASKING QUESTIONS?
77
00:03:48,897 --> 00:03:50,398
YEAH.
WELL, THAT'S
THE BEAUTY OF THIS.
78
00:03:50,431 --> 00:03:53,134
AUNT FLORENCE
HASN'T SEEN RICHARD
SINCE HE WAS 5 YEARS OLD.
79
00:03:53,167 --> 00:03:54,102
FOR ALL THEY KNOW,
I'M HIM.
80
00:03:54,135 --> 00:03:55,336
WELL, AS A TEENAGER,
81
00:03:55,369 --> 00:03:58,840
THE IDEA OF GOING
TO A FAMILY REUNION
SICKENS ME TO MY CORE.
82
00:03:58,873 --> 00:04:00,641
TOMMY, UH...
83
00:04:00,674 --> 00:04:02,710
WE'VE BEEN HERE ON EARTH
FOR ALMOST 3 YEARS,
84
00:04:02,743 --> 00:04:06,114
AND WE STILL LACK SOMETHING
THAT'S SO IMPORTANT TO US--
85
00:04:06,147 --> 00:04:08,349
ROOTS. A CONNECTION.
86
00:04:08,382 --> 00:04:10,118
LIFE HERE IS NOT JUST ABOUT
WHERE WE'RE GOING,
87
00:04:10,151 --> 00:04:12,286
IT'S ABOUT WHERE
WE'VE COME FROM.
88
00:04:12,320 --> 00:04:13,621
NOW WE'D BETTER GET
ON THE ROAD.
89
00:04:13,654 --> 00:04:15,957
YOU KNOW HOW
AUNT FLORENCE HATES IT
WHEN WE'RE LATE.
90
00:04:22,663 --> 00:04:24,032
[DING-DONG]
91
00:04:26,667 --> 00:04:27,201
AUNT FLORENCE?
92
00:04:27,235 --> 00:04:28,036
YES?
93
00:04:28,069 --> 00:04:29,470
IT'S ME. RICHARD.
94
00:04:29,503 --> 00:04:30,771
RICHARD?
95
00:04:30,805 --> 00:04:33,774
OH, MY GOODNESS!
IT IS YOU!
96
00:04:33,808 --> 00:04:35,443
ABE! IT'S RICHARD!
97
00:04:35,476 --> 00:04:37,211
WELL, I'LL BE
DAMNED! HA HA!
98
00:04:37,245 --> 00:04:40,114
HA HA HA!
WELL, WELCOME BACK!
99
00:04:40,148 --> 00:04:41,582
AND WHO ARE ALL THESE
LOVELY PEOPLE?
100
00:04:41,615 --> 00:04:45,119
WELL, THIS IS MY SISTER,
YOUR NIECE SALLY.
101
00:04:45,153 --> 00:04:48,056
AND THIS IS MY SON,
YOUR GRANDNEPHEW TOMMY.
102
00:04:48,089 --> 00:04:50,859
AND THIS IS MY BROTHER,
YOUR NEPHEW HARRY.
103
00:04:50,892 --> 00:04:52,793
YAAH! HARRY!
104
00:04:53,928 --> 00:04:56,497
AND THIS LITTLE HOTTIE
IS MY GIRLFRIEND MARY.
105
00:04:56,530 --> 00:04:59,300
NICE TO MEET YOU,
FLORENCE.
106
00:04:59,333 --> 00:05:00,869
RICHARD, COME GREET
THE FAMILY.
107
00:05:00,902 --> 00:05:02,003
THEY CAN'T WAIT
TO SEE YOU.
108
00:05:02,036 --> 00:05:06,074
OH, I CAN'T WAIT
TO SEE THEM.
109
00:05:06,107 --> 00:05:08,509
UH, WELL, WE BROUGHT YOU THIS.
110
00:05:08,542 --> 00:05:10,344
IT GOES GREAT WITH STEAK.
111
00:05:10,378 --> 00:05:14,215
AT LEAST IT DID LAST NIGHT.
112
00:05:14,248 --> 00:05:15,449
YOU CHEAP BASTARD,
113
00:05:15,483 --> 00:05:17,651
YOU'LL FIT RIGHT IN
AROUND HERE.
114
00:05:17,685 --> 00:05:18,819
BUNCH OF TIGHTWADS?
115
00:05:18,853 --> 00:05:21,555
TIGHTWADS? DON'T
EVEN GET ME STARTED
WITH THIS FAMILY.
116
00:05:21,589 --> 00:05:22,356
COME HERE.
117
00:05:22,390 --> 00:05:25,059
IT'S ME,
RICHARD!
118
00:05:25,093 --> 00:05:27,929
OH, IT'S ME, RICHARD!
119
00:05:27,962 --> 00:05:29,263
OH, THIS IS SO GREAT.
120
00:05:29,297 --> 00:05:30,498
I JUST OPENED MY ARMS,
121
00:05:30,531 --> 00:05:34,002
AND I'M HUGGED AND KISSED
AND PINCHED BY ALL SORTS
OF PEOPLE.
122
00:05:34,035 --> 00:05:36,337
THERE ISN'T EVEN
A COVER CHARGE.
123
00:05:36,370 --> 00:05:38,639
WE'RE FAMILY,
RICHARD!
124
00:05:38,672 --> 00:05:41,742
FAMILY.
IT'S ME, RICHARD!
125
00:05:41,775 --> 00:05:44,745
OH, IT DOES
MY HEART GOOD
TO SEE HIM BACK.
126
00:05:44,778 --> 00:05:47,348
IT'S FUNNY. HE NEVER
MENTIONED ANY OF YOU.
127
00:05:47,381 --> 00:05:48,516
WELL, GIVEN
ALL THE TROUBLES,
128
00:05:48,549 --> 00:05:50,851
I NEVER THOUGHT
I'D SEE HIM HERE AGAIN.
129
00:05:52,486 --> 00:05:54,188
WHAT TROUBLES?
130
00:05:57,658 --> 00:05:59,560
HI.
131
00:05:59,593 --> 00:06:01,362
HEY.
132
00:06:01,395 --> 00:06:02,763
HEY.
133
00:06:05,366 --> 00:06:07,335
THAT'S A GREAT TOP.
134
00:06:07,368 --> 00:06:08,937
YOU THINK SO?
135
00:06:08,970 --> 00:06:10,704
I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO WEAR.
136
00:06:10,738 --> 00:06:11,973
OH, NO, IT'S--
IT'S PERFECT.
137
00:06:12,006 --> 00:06:14,342
OH, THANKS. I LIVE
WITH A BUNCH OF MEN,
138
00:06:14,375 --> 00:06:15,443
AND THEY WERE NO HELP
AT ALL.
139
00:06:15,476 --> 00:06:16,877
YEAH. HA HA.
140
00:06:16,911 --> 00:06:18,646
HEY, I'M MICHELLE,
MARTHA'S DAUGHTER.
141
00:06:18,679 --> 00:06:21,082
OH, HI, I'M SALLY,
RICHARD'S SISTER.
142
00:06:21,115 --> 00:06:22,883
NICE TO MEET YOU.
YOU, TOO.
143
00:06:22,917 --> 00:06:24,185
HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT?
144
00:06:24,218 --> 00:06:26,720
MY SWEATER WOULD GO
SO GREAT WITH THAT TOP.
145
00:06:26,754 --> 00:06:27,922
OH, YOU WANNA TRY IT ON?
146
00:06:27,956 --> 00:06:30,224
SURE.
147
00:06:30,258 --> 00:06:32,493
OH, YEAH.
DEFINITELY HIP.
148
00:06:32,526 --> 00:06:34,395
COOL. HA HA.
149
00:06:34,428 --> 00:06:36,630
HEY, YOU WANNA
WEAR MY SHOES?
150
00:06:36,664 --> 00:06:40,468
I'VE GOT A PAIR OF SOCKS
I'M NOT USING. I'LL GO GET 'EM.
151
00:06:49,910 --> 00:06:52,113
IT'S, UH, POT ROAST.
152
00:06:52,146 --> 00:06:54,182
OH, WOW.
I WAS WAY OFF.
153
00:06:57,085 --> 00:06:58,652
HI. I'M JANINE.
154
00:06:58,686 --> 00:07:00,821
I'M TOMMY.
155
00:07:00,854 --> 00:07:01,990
SO...
156
00:07:02,023 --> 00:07:03,424
[BORED]
THIS IS PRETTY FUN, HUH?
157
00:07:03,457 --> 00:07:04,792
OH, YEAH.
158
00:07:04,825 --> 00:07:06,294
HEY? YOU WANNA
GET OUTTA HERE?
159
00:07:06,327 --> 00:07:08,662
OH, YEAH.
COME ON.
160
00:07:08,696 --> 00:07:10,965
Aunt Sylvia: AUDREY MADE
HER FAMOUS AMBROSIA.
161
00:07:10,999 --> 00:07:14,835
YOU BETTER HURRY,
IT'S GONNA GO.
162
00:07:14,868 --> 00:07:16,637
SWEET WOMAN,
THAT SYLVIA.
163
00:07:16,670 --> 00:07:19,107
YEAH, SWEET.
BUT DUMB
AS A DOORKNOB.
164
00:07:20,608 --> 00:07:23,011
AND DON'T EVEN
GET ME STARTED
WITH HER KIDS.
165
00:07:23,044 --> 00:07:25,179
MMM. ROCKET SCIENTISTS,
HUH?
166
00:07:25,213 --> 00:07:26,914
OHH, YOU GOT IT, PAL.
167
00:07:26,947 --> 00:07:30,518
WELL, DOORKNOBS
BEGET DOORKNOBS.
168
00:07:33,921 --> 00:07:36,357
[HACKING IN UNISON]
169
00:07:36,890 --> 00:07:40,094
IT'S ME, RICHARD!
170
00:07:40,128 --> 00:07:41,062
FELLAS...
171
00:07:41,095 --> 00:07:44,798
IT'S ME, RICHARD!
172
00:07:44,832 --> 00:07:47,001
OH, YOU'RE NOT HUGGERS.
I UNDERSTAND.
173
00:07:47,035 --> 00:07:49,037
RICHARD, I DON'T SUPPOSE
YOU REMEMBER ME.
174
00:07:49,070 --> 00:07:50,604
I'M YOUR COUSIN JACOB.
175
00:07:50,638 --> 00:07:52,573
JACOB, OF COURSE.
IT'S BEEN A LONG TIME.
176
00:07:52,606 --> 00:07:55,176
IT CERTAINLY HAS,
DONUTS.
177
00:07:55,209 --> 00:07:56,877
DONUTS?
178
00:07:56,910 --> 00:07:58,046
WAS THAT
MY NICKNAME?
179
00:07:58,079 --> 00:07:59,513
SURE.
DON'T YOU REMEMBER?
180
00:07:59,547 --> 00:08:01,149
I WAS DUTCH,
AND YOU WERE DONUTS.
181
00:08:01,182 --> 00:08:01,982
DONUTS?
182
00:08:02,016 --> 00:08:05,153
THIS GUY ONCE ATE
2 DOZEN DOUGHNUTS...
183
00:08:05,186 --> 00:08:09,057
AND PUKED 'EM UP ON
GRANDMA LILLIAN'S WIG.
184
00:08:09,090 --> 00:08:09,957
DONUTS.
185
00:08:09,990 --> 00:08:11,525
SAY, YOU'RE RUNNING
ON EMPTY THERE, DICK.
186
00:08:11,559 --> 00:08:12,760
LET ME, UH,
GET YOU A DRINK.
187
00:08:12,793 --> 00:08:14,495
SOUNDS GOOD.
FELLAS,
188
00:08:14,528 --> 00:08:17,231
LAST CHANCE
FOR HUGS.
189
00:08:17,265 --> 00:08:19,633
OK. CATCH YOU LATER.
190
00:08:19,667 --> 00:08:21,235
SO, DICK,
191
00:08:21,269 --> 00:08:22,536
IT'S BEEN A WHILE.
192
00:08:22,570 --> 00:08:24,838
I WOULD'VE COME SOONER
IF I'D KNOWN WHAT I
WAS MISSING.
193
00:08:24,872 --> 00:08:28,008
I'LL BET YOU WOULD'VE.
194
00:08:28,042 --> 00:08:30,010
WE'VE DONE ALL RIGHT
SINCE YOU'VE BEEN AWAY,
HAVEN'T WE?
195
00:08:30,044 --> 00:08:32,413
OH, AND I'VE NEVER SEEN
SO MANY KINDS OF DIP.
196
00:08:35,049 --> 00:08:36,617
COME ON, COUSIN.
197
00:08:36,650 --> 00:08:38,352
YOU CAN BE STRAIGHT WITH ME.
198
00:08:38,386 --> 00:08:41,589
WHAT REALLY
BRINGS YOU BACK HERE
AFTER ALL THIS TIME?
199
00:08:41,622 --> 00:08:44,292
I CAME TO MEET
MY FAMILY.
200
00:08:44,325 --> 00:08:46,327
RIGHT.
201
00:08:46,360 --> 00:08:49,830
BOY, YOU ARE SOME
PIECE OF WORK, DICK.
202
00:08:49,863 --> 00:08:51,465
WAIT. UH...
203
00:08:51,499 --> 00:08:53,201
WHAT'S THE PROBLEM?
DUTCH?
204
00:08:53,234 --> 00:08:56,537
IT'S ME, DONUTS!
205
00:08:56,570 --> 00:08:58,972
HE TOLD YOU GUYS
NOT TO HUG ME,
DIDN'T HE?
206
00:09:00,708 --> 00:09:01,842
SO, SALLY, YOU HAVE
A BOYFRIEND?
207
00:09:01,875 --> 00:09:03,544
YES, I DO, MICHELLE.
208
00:09:03,577 --> 00:09:05,079
HIS NAME IS DON,
209
00:09:05,113 --> 00:09:06,147
AND HE'S A COP.
210
00:09:06,180 --> 00:09:07,748
OH, COPS ARE SO HOT.
211
00:09:07,781 --> 00:09:08,916
OH, YEAH,
TELL ME ABOUT IT.
212
00:09:08,949 --> 00:09:11,652
AND I GOT ME
THE HOTTEST ONE.
213
00:09:11,685 --> 00:09:13,854
HEY, CHECK HIM OUT.
214
00:09:20,528 --> 00:09:24,965
HANDS OFF, HON.
HE'S MINE.
215
00:09:24,998 --> 00:09:28,469
YEAH, WELL, MY BOYFRIEND
JUST WORKS IN A CAFETERIA.
216
00:09:28,502 --> 00:09:32,106
HOLD UP. DOES HE WEAR ONE OF
THOSE COOL CAFETERIA UNIFORMS?
217
00:09:32,140 --> 00:09:35,042
YEAH.
AND AREN'T
UNIFORMS SEXY?
218
00:09:35,075 --> 00:09:35,909
WELL, YEAH.
219
00:09:35,943 --> 00:09:37,511
ALL RIGHT THEN!
220
00:09:39,180 --> 00:09:43,050
OH, YOU ARE SO COOL.
I JUST FEEL LIKE I
CAN TELL YOU STUFF.
221
00:09:43,083 --> 00:09:44,718
YOU KNOW, KINDA
LIKE YOU'RE MY...
222
00:09:44,752 --> 00:09:46,820
MY SISTER.
223
00:09:52,826 --> 00:09:56,264
SO, JANINE...
224
00:09:56,297 --> 00:09:58,299
DO YOU, UH,
225
00:09:58,332 --> 00:10:00,134
HAVE A BOYFRIEND?
226
00:10:00,168 --> 00:10:01,034
NO.
227
00:10:01,068 --> 00:10:03,671
BUT I'M LOOKING.
228
00:10:03,704 --> 00:10:06,174
WELL...
229
00:10:06,207 --> 00:10:09,910
LOOK NO FURTHER.
230
00:10:09,943 --> 00:10:11,179
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
231
00:10:11,212 --> 00:10:12,446
MAKING MY MOVE.
232
00:10:12,480 --> 00:10:14,815
TOMMY, WE CAN'T DO THAT.
233
00:10:14,848 --> 00:10:17,251
WE'RE, LIKE, COUSINS.
234
00:10:17,285 --> 00:10:19,487
OH, YEAH.
ABOUT THAT, SEE...
235
00:10:19,520 --> 00:10:22,089
THE THING IS, THAT'S
NOT REALLY ILLEGAL
OR ANYTHING.
236
00:10:22,122 --> 00:10:24,758
IT'S JUST...TABOO.
237
00:10:24,792 --> 00:10:26,560
OH, MY GOD!
238
00:10:26,594 --> 00:10:27,995
I'M, LIKE, SO CREEPED OUT.
239
00:10:28,028 --> 00:10:30,798
WAIT, WAIT. WE'RE
VERY DISTANT COUSINS.
240
00:10:30,831 --> 00:10:33,401
YOU HAVE NO IDEA
HOW DISTANT WE ARE.
DISTANT!
241
00:10:36,270 --> 00:10:38,806
OH, MARY, THE ODDEST THING
JUST HAPPENED.
242
00:10:38,839 --> 00:10:41,108
I THINK ONE OF MY RELATIVES
TOLD ME OFF.
243
00:10:41,141 --> 00:10:42,776
WAS IT JACOB?
244
00:10:42,810 --> 00:10:44,478
HOW DID YOU KNOW THAT?
245
00:10:44,512 --> 00:10:46,480
DICK, HOW MUCH DID
YOUR FATHER TELL YOU
246
00:10:46,514 --> 00:10:51,319
ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED
BETWEEN HIM
AND THE FAMILY?
247
00:10:51,352 --> 00:10:52,253
NOT A LOT.
248
00:10:52,286 --> 00:10:54,688
H-HE LOST HIS MOUTH
IN THE WAR.
249
00:10:56,457 --> 00:10:58,158
YOU BETTER SIT DOWN.
250
00:10:59,760 --> 00:11:01,262
DICK...
251
00:11:01,295 --> 00:11:03,096
WHEN YOUR FATHER
FELL IN LOVE
WITH YOUR MOTHER,
252
00:11:03,130 --> 00:11:05,433
SHE HAD JUST ARRIVED
FROM LITHUANIA.
253
00:11:05,466 --> 00:11:08,168
SHE WAS POOR,
SHE DIDN'T SPEAK
ANY ENGLISH.
254
00:11:08,202 --> 00:11:10,170
THE FAMILY DIDN'T
APPROVE OF HER.
255
00:11:10,204 --> 00:11:10,571
MOMMY?
256
00:11:10,604 --> 00:11:12,740
ANYWAY...
257
00:11:12,773 --> 00:11:16,076
YOUR FATHER WAS FORCED
TO CHOOSE BETWEEN HER
AND THE FAMILY,
258
00:11:16,109 --> 00:11:17,445
AND HE CHOSE HER.
259
00:11:17,478 --> 00:11:18,279
DADDY?
260
00:11:18,312 --> 00:11:20,581
SO THE FAMILY...
DISOWNED HIM,
261
00:11:20,614 --> 00:11:22,550
AND IT WAS
JACOB'S FATHER
262
00:11:22,583 --> 00:11:24,885
WHO CUT HIM OUT
OF THE FAMILY
FURNITURE BUSINESS.
263
00:11:24,918 --> 00:11:27,688
CAST OUT ONTO THE STREET
BY HIS OWN FLESH AND BLOOD?
264
00:11:27,721 --> 00:11:28,989
MY GOD, MARY.
265
00:11:29,022 --> 00:11:32,159
MY FAMILY IS DESPICABLE.
266
00:11:32,192 --> 00:11:33,794
AH, YOU GET USED TO IT.
267
00:11:37,998 --> 00:11:40,133
THEY GAVE YOUR MOM
AND DAD THE BOOT, HUH?
268
00:11:40,167 --> 00:11:42,002
SALLY, IT'S
OUR MOM AND DAD.
269
00:11:42,035 --> 00:11:43,837
IT'S NOBODY'S
MOM AND DAD!
270
00:11:43,871 --> 00:11:46,707
I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT
OUR FAMILY WOULD DO
ANYTHING SO HEARTLESS.
271
00:11:46,740 --> 00:11:49,743
DON'T EVEN GET ME
STARTED ON THIS FAMILY.
272
00:11:52,280 --> 00:11:53,847
ROGER'S A DRUNK.
273
00:11:53,881 --> 00:11:55,283
DARREN
HASN'T PAID TAXES
274
00:11:55,316 --> 00:11:57,818
SINCE THE EISENHOWER
ADMINISTRATION.
275
00:11:57,851 --> 00:12:01,622
COUSIN MARTY'S GOT
HIS OWN WEBSITE--
276
00:12:01,655 --> 00:12:03,557
NAKEDMARTY.COM.
277
00:12:06,260 --> 00:12:08,662
WHY DON'T WE JUST
ADMIT TO THEM
THAT WE'RE IMPOSTORS?
278
00:12:08,696 --> 00:12:09,597
YEAH, RIGHT.
279
00:12:09,630 --> 00:12:10,998
YOU JUST WANT US
TO COME CLEAN
280
00:12:11,031 --> 00:12:12,833
SO YOU CAN GO SUCK FACE
WITH YOUR COUSIN.
281
00:12:12,866 --> 00:12:14,635
YEAH, WELL, AT LEAST
I HAVEN'T DELUDED MYSELF
282
00:12:14,668 --> 00:12:16,136
INTO THINKING
I HAVE A SISTER.
283
00:12:16,169 --> 00:12:18,606
HEY, YOU LEAVE MISSY
OUT OF THIS.
284
00:12:18,639 --> 00:12:19,773
I'M CURIOUS.
285
00:12:19,807 --> 00:12:25,012
DOES THIS FAMILY HAVE
A HISTORY OF MENTAL ILLNESS?
286
00:12:25,045 --> 00:12:27,715
WELL, THERE IS
A TOUCH OF DEMENTIA
ON MY FATHER'S SIDE.
287
00:12:27,748 --> 00:12:31,184
OH, THAT EXPLAINS
A FEW THINGS.
288
00:12:31,218 --> 00:12:32,252
DICK, WHAT ARE
YOU DOING?
289
00:12:32,286 --> 00:12:33,053
I HAVE TO TALK
TO JACOB.
290
00:12:33,086 --> 00:12:33,887
WELL,
CALM DOWN.
291
00:12:33,921 --> 00:12:34,955
JACOB,
WE HAVE TO TALK.
292
00:12:34,988 --> 00:12:37,190
HERE IT COMES.
293
00:12:37,224 --> 00:12:38,592
I'VE HEARD
SOME THINGS
ABOUT THE FAMILY
294
00:12:38,626 --> 00:12:39,393
AND THE BUSINESS--
295
00:12:39,427 --> 00:12:41,629
SO YOU FINALLY
WORKED UP THE MARBLES
296
00:12:41,662 --> 00:12:42,496
TO GET AROUND TO IT.
297
00:12:42,530 --> 00:12:43,997
SO, THIS IS
ABOUT THE BUSINESS.
298
00:12:44,031 --> 00:12:45,599
WHO'S SHE, YOUR LAWYER?
299
00:12:45,633 --> 00:12:47,701
OH, NO, I'M
HIS GIRLFRIEND.
300
00:12:47,735 --> 00:12:48,602
OH.
301
00:12:48,636 --> 00:12:49,637
NOT MARRIED?
302
00:12:49,670 --> 00:12:51,505
THAT'S CURIOUS.
303
00:12:51,539 --> 00:12:52,606
LOOK, DICK,
304
00:12:52,640 --> 00:12:54,375
YOUR FATHER
LEFT THIS FAMILY,
305
00:12:54,408 --> 00:12:56,076
AND MY FATHER WAS RIGHT
TO CUT HIM OUT
OF THE BUSINESS.
306
00:12:56,109 --> 00:12:58,912
AS FAR AS I'M CONCERNED,
YOU'RE NOT ENTITLED
TO A PENNY.
307
00:12:58,946 --> 00:13:00,781
YOU THINK I WANT MONEY?!
308
00:13:00,814 --> 00:13:02,550
WELL, BY THE LOOKS OF
THAT CAR YOU ARRIVED IN,
309
00:13:02,583 --> 00:13:04,452
I WOULDN'T BE SURPRISED.
310
00:13:04,485 --> 00:13:05,519
I WOULD HAVE YOU KNOW
311
00:13:05,553 --> 00:13:08,589
THAT I'M QUALIFIED
FOR PLATINUM STATUS!
312
00:13:08,622 --> 00:13:10,658
SO I'D ZIP IT
IF I WERE YOU!
313
00:13:10,691 --> 00:13:13,661
OH, PLEASE.
WE SHOULDN'T
GET PERSONAL.
314
00:13:13,694 --> 00:13:15,363
I'D STAY OUT OF THIS,
HONEY.
315
00:13:15,396 --> 00:13:17,498
HONEY?!
316
00:13:17,531 --> 00:13:20,000
WELL, LET ME TELL YOU
A THING OR TWO, HONEY.
317
00:13:20,033 --> 00:13:22,035
WHOEVER DID
YOUR ELECTROLYSIS...
318
00:13:22,069 --> 00:13:24,972
MISSED A SPOT!
319
00:13:25,005 --> 00:13:26,574
HOW DARE YOU?!
320
00:13:26,607 --> 00:13:27,375
COME ON, JACOB.
321
00:13:27,408 --> 00:13:28,676
OH, THAT'S RIGHT.
THAT'S RIGHT!
322
00:13:28,709 --> 00:13:30,444
HIDE BEHIND
HER APRON STRINGS.
323
00:13:30,478 --> 00:13:33,347
OH, PLEASE, RICHARD.
YOU'RE ACTING JUST
LIKE YOUR FATHER.
324
00:13:33,381 --> 00:13:34,615
DAMN STRAIGHT,
AUNT FLORENCE!
325
00:13:34,648 --> 00:13:36,350
DAMN STRAIGHT!
326
00:13:40,521 --> 00:13:42,923
[PLAYING CLARINET
BADLY]
327
00:13:42,956 --> 00:13:45,192
MAN, I CAN'T CATCH A BREAK.
328
00:13:45,225 --> 00:13:47,495
I FINALLY MEET A HOT GIRL--
WHO LIKES ME--
329
00:13:47,528 --> 00:13:50,464
AND SHE TURNS OUT TO BE
MY COUSIN?!
330
00:13:50,498 --> 00:13:53,967
WELL...
HAPPENS TO A LOT
OF GUYS, KIDDO.
331
00:13:56,336 --> 00:13:57,705
JANINE.
332
00:13:57,738 --> 00:14:00,708
WAIT A SECOND.
JANINE SOLOMON?
YEAH.
333
00:14:00,741 --> 00:14:02,576
WELL, THIS IS
YOUR LUCKY DAY.
334
00:14:02,610 --> 00:14:04,878
UNCLE ABE TOLD ME
SHE'S ADOPTED.
335
00:14:04,912 --> 00:14:07,448
ADOPTED?
ARE YOU SURE?
336
00:14:07,481 --> 00:14:12,352
OH, DON'T EVEN GET ME
STARTED ON HER FATHER'S
LOW SPERM COUNT.
337
00:14:13,987 --> 00:14:16,724
HARRY!
I COULD KISS YOU!
338
00:14:17,891 --> 00:14:19,460
HEY, SALLY, CAN I
TELL YOU A SECRET?
339
00:14:19,493 --> 00:14:21,929
SURE, MISSY.
OF COURSE YOU CAN.
340
00:14:21,962 --> 00:14:23,631
I'M A VIRGIN.
341
00:14:23,664 --> 00:14:24,932
WOW.
I KNOW.
342
00:14:24,965 --> 00:14:27,801
REALLY? WOW.
343
00:14:27,835 --> 00:14:31,405
I REMEMBER WHAT THOSE DAYS
WERE LIKE, YOU KNOW.
344
00:14:31,439 --> 00:14:34,608
FEELING LIKE I WAS
THE ONLY PERSON ON EARTH
WHO HADN'T HAD SEX.
345
00:14:34,642 --> 00:14:36,877
WONDERING WHAT IT
WAS GONNA BE LIKE.
346
00:14:36,910 --> 00:14:38,211
WHEN DID YOU LOSE
YOUR VIRGINITY?
347
00:14:38,245 --> 00:14:40,047
AH, A COUPLE OF WEEKS AGO.
348
00:14:44,117 --> 00:14:44,852
WOW.
349
00:14:44,885 --> 00:14:46,420
YEAH. SO WHAT ARE YOU
WAITING FOR?
350
00:14:46,454 --> 00:14:50,290
I DON'T KNOW.
UH, THE RIGHT GUY.
351
00:14:50,323 --> 00:14:51,959
OH, MY GOD.
352
00:14:51,992 --> 00:14:54,061
THAT IS EXACTLY
WHAT I DID.
353
00:14:54,094 --> 00:14:56,163
THAT IS SO COOL!
354
00:14:57,665 --> 00:14:59,299
LOOK,
I'M TELLIN' YA.
355
00:14:59,332 --> 00:15:01,401
I HEARD YA.
356
00:15:03,403 --> 00:15:05,372
FAH! YOU SHOULD
BE SO LUCKY.
357
00:15:05,405 --> 00:15:09,610
AH! I SHOULD
LIVE SO LONG.
358
00:15:09,643 --> 00:15:10,544
BRAUGGGHH!
359
00:15:10,578 --> 00:15:11,979
YAAAH-AGGH!
360
00:15:13,781 --> 00:15:15,148
JANINE. THERE YOU ARE.
361
00:15:15,182 --> 00:15:16,650
I'VE BEEN LOOKING
ALL OVER FOR YOU.
362
00:15:16,684 --> 00:15:18,886
I KNOW.
I'VE BEEN AVOIDING YOU.
363
00:15:18,919 --> 00:15:20,120
NO, YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND.
364
00:15:20,153 --> 00:15:23,991
SEE, IT'S OK IF WE KISS
BECAUSE WE'RE NOT RELATED.
365
00:15:24,024 --> 00:15:25,559
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
366
00:15:25,593 --> 00:15:28,629
YOU KNOW,
'CAUSE YOU'RE ADOPTED.
367
00:15:28,662 --> 00:15:30,297
ADOPTED?
368
00:15:30,330 --> 00:15:32,432
[NERVOUS LAUGH]
NO. NO WAY. NO, I'M NOT.
369
00:15:32,466 --> 00:15:34,768
YEAH, SURE YOU ARE.
EVERYBODY KNOWS IT.
370
00:15:34,802 --> 00:15:39,172
SO, UH...
YOU WANNA MAKE OUT?
371
00:15:39,206 --> 00:15:40,407
MOM!
372
00:15:40,440 --> 00:15:42,710
YEAH.
YOU JUST CONFIRM IT
WITH YOUR MOTHER
373
00:15:42,743 --> 00:15:44,512
AND, UH,
GET BACK TO ME.
374
00:15:49,517 --> 00:15:51,719
THEY'RE RIGHT.
YOU CAN'T GO HOME AGAIN.
375
00:15:51,752 --> 00:15:54,187
SO MUCH FOR "FAMILY"
AND "BROTHERHOOD"
376
00:15:54,221 --> 00:15:57,190
AND "HOME IS
WHERE THE HEART IS."
WHAT A BUNCH OF CRAP!
377
00:15:57,224 --> 00:15:59,893
NOW YOU KNOW WHERE
I'VE BEEN COMING FROM.
378
00:15:59,927 --> 00:16:01,461
YOU GO HOME
FOR THE HOLIDAYS,
379
00:16:01,495 --> 00:16:03,697
YOU SEE THAT BEAUTIFUL
CHRISTMAS TREE
IN THE WINDOW.
380
00:16:03,731 --> 00:16:06,099
EVERYTHING LOOKS
SO IDYLLIC.
381
00:16:06,133 --> 00:16:07,467
AND ALL OF A SUDDEN
THERE'S YOUR MOTHER
382
00:16:07,501 --> 00:16:09,402
SWINGING A 5-IRON
AT YOUR FATHER'S HEAD,
383
00:16:09,436 --> 00:16:12,405
AND THE TREE'S
IN THE EGGNOG.
384
00:16:12,439 --> 00:16:13,774
HOW DO YOU DEAL WITH IT?
385
00:16:13,807 --> 00:16:15,543
I REPRESS.
386
00:16:15,576 --> 00:16:18,846
REPRESSION IS THE KEY
TO A HAPPY FAMILY.
387
00:16:18,879 --> 00:16:20,948
DOESN'T SOUND
VERY HEALTHY.
388
00:16:20,981 --> 00:16:22,149
IF YOU YELL AND SCREAM,
389
00:16:22,182 --> 00:16:24,918
YOU END UP SOUNDING
LIKE YOUR MOTHER.
390
00:16:24,952 --> 00:16:27,721
I'M GONNA GO GET
ANOTHER DRINK.
391
00:16:27,755 --> 00:16:29,222
DIDN'T YOU JUST FINISH ONE?
392
00:16:29,256 --> 00:16:32,059
GET OFF MY BACK!
393
00:16:34,061 --> 00:16:36,029
HEY, SO, DO YOU THINK
I SHOULD GO LIGHTER?
394
00:16:36,063 --> 00:16:38,632
HONEY, IF YOU DO,
I WILL KILL YOU.
395
00:16:38,666 --> 00:16:40,433
MICHELLE!
396
00:16:40,467 --> 00:16:41,268
JENNY!
397
00:16:41,301 --> 00:16:42,903
[BOTH SHRIEK]
398
00:16:42,936 --> 00:16:44,705
MICHELLE? MICHELLE?
399
00:16:44,738 --> 00:16:45,372
MICHELLE!
400
00:16:45,405 --> 00:16:47,107
HUH?
401
00:16:47,140 --> 00:16:48,709
WHO'S THAT?
402
00:16:48,742 --> 00:16:49,710
OH! OH!
403
00:16:49,743 --> 00:16:50,878
WHY, SALLY, THIS IS JENNY.
404
00:16:50,911 --> 00:16:51,979
HI, JENNY.
HI.
405
00:16:52,012 --> 00:16:54,147
SHE'S MY SISTER.
406
00:16:54,181 --> 00:16:54,715
SISTER?
407
00:16:54,748 --> 00:16:55,816
HOW'S BOOTY?
408
00:16:55,849 --> 00:16:57,585
OH,
BOOTY'S GREAT.
409
00:16:57,618 --> 00:16:58,586
WH-WHO'S BOOTY?
410
00:16:58,619 --> 00:17:00,821
HEY, DID YOU SING
TO THE LAKE YET?
411
00:17:00,854 --> 00:17:02,055
YOU GUYS SING
TO THE LAKE?
412
00:17:02,089 --> 00:17:03,724
OH, YEAH. EVER
SINCE WE WERE KIDS.
413
00:17:03,757 --> 00:17:07,160
OH, GREAT! LET'S GO
DO SOME LAKE SINGIN'!
414
00:17:07,194 --> 00:17:10,297
UH, WELL, IT'S KINDA
JUST BETWEEN THE TWO OF US.
415
00:17:10,330 --> 00:17:11,565
ARE YOU SURE
I CAN'T HELP?
416
00:17:11,599 --> 00:17:15,068
I MEAN,
THAT'S A--A BIG LAKE,
417
00:17:15,102 --> 00:17:17,437
AND I'M REAL LOUD.
418
00:17:17,470 --> 00:17:19,640
UH...IT'S OK.
419
00:17:19,673 --> 00:17:21,875
YOU KNOW, IT'S JUST THIS
SORT OF STUPID SISTER THING.
420
00:17:21,909 --> 00:17:24,177
[AWKWARD LAUGH]
421
00:17:34,755 --> 00:17:35,656
ALL RIGHT,
EVERYBODY,
422
00:17:35,689 --> 00:17:37,557
GET READY.
HERE WE GO.
423
00:17:40,661 --> 00:17:42,730
OHH! [MUTTERING]
424
00:17:45,332 --> 00:17:47,735
[SARCASTIC] THIS WAS
SOME GREAT IDEA, DICK.
425
00:17:47,768 --> 00:17:49,536
YEAH, I CAN'T WAIT TO
COME BACK NEXT YEAR.
426
00:17:49,569 --> 00:17:52,139
DICK, YOU WANNA TELL YOUR
FAMILY TO STOP WHINING.
427
00:17:52,172 --> 00:17:54,441
NO. JUST SMILE
AND REPRESS.
428
00:17:54,474 --> 00:17:55,442
SMILE AND REPRESS.
429
00:17:55,475 --> 00:17:56,143
ALL RIGHT
NOW, EVERYBODY.
430
00:17:56,176 --> 00:17:57,678
COME ON NOW,
SQUEEZE TOGETHER.
431
00:17:57,711 --> 00:17:58,946
SQUEEZE TOGETHER,
THAT'S GOOD.
432
00:17:58,979 --> 00:18:00,748
GOOD. HA HA.
433
00:18:00,781 --> 00:18:02,015
ALL RIGHT NOW...
434
00:18:02,049 --> 00:18:03,183
EVERYBODY...
435
00:18:03,216 --> 00:18:05,853
SMILE!
436
00:18:05,886 --> 00:18:08,255
OHH!
437
00:18:08,288 --> 00:18:10,523
I CAN'T SMILE!
I HAVE NOTHING
TO SMILE ABOUT!
438
00:18:10,557 --> 00:18:11,759
I HATE THIS FAMILY!
439
00:18:11,792 --> 00:18:13,193
RIGHT BACK AT YA, DICK!
440
00:18:13,226 --> 00:18:16,129
AND I SO WANTED
TO BE PROUD OF YOU.
441
00:18:16,163 --> 00:18:17,898
[BITTERLY]
MY FAMILY.
442
00:18:17,931 --> 00:18:21,401
YOU WERE SUPPOSED
TO GIVE ME WARMTH
AND UNENDING LOVE.
443
00:18:21,434 --> 00:18:24,672
INSTEAD YOU GIVE ME
A PUNCH IN THE GUT
AND A COLD TUNA MELT!
444
00:18:24,705 --> 00:18:25,973
WELL, I'VE HAD IT!
445
00:18:26,006 --> 00:18:28,075
AND SO I TAKE MY LEAVE
OF THIS HELLHOUSE
446
00:18:28,108 --> 00:18:29,509
JUST LIKE MY FATHER
BEFORE ME!
447
00:18:29,542 --> 00:18:30,577
BYE-BYE NOW.
448
00:18:30,610 --> 00:18:32,746
I'D PACK YOU A DOGGY BAG,
BUT I SAW HER
449
00:18:32,780 --> 00:18:35,215
STUFFING THE HORS D'OEUVRES
INTO HER POCKETS.
450
00:18:35,248 --> 00:18:38,051
DON'T FLATTER YOURSELF.
IT WAS THE SILVERWARE.
451
00:18:39,653 --> 00:18:41,188
EXCUSE ME.
WEREN'T YOU LEAVING?
452
00:18:41,221 --> 00:18:42,856
OH, BELIEVE ME,
WE'RE LEAVING.
453
00:18:42,890 --> 00:18:47,527
[ALL TALKING AT ONCE]
454
00:18:47,560 --> 00:18:53,566
HEY! HEY! HEY!
455
00:18:53,600 --> 00:18:57,204
WHAT THE HELL'S THE MATTER
WITH YOU PEOPLE?
456
00:18:57,237 --> 00:19:00,040
YOU KNOW WHAT? I GOT
A LITTLE NEWS FLASH FOR YA.
457
00:19:00,073 --> 00:19:01,809
DICK, JACOB,
458
00:19:01,842 --> 00:19:05,578
BOTH YOUR FATHERS
WERE WORLD-CLASS
PAINS IN THE ASS.
459
00:19:05,612 --> 00:19:07,480
AND YOU KNOW WHAT I
ADMIRE ABOUT 'EM?
460
00:19:07,514 --> 00:19:09,016
THEY'RE BOTH DEAD!
461
00:19:11,752 --> 00:19:14,021
AND RIGHT NOW,
I WISH I WAS WITH 'EM.
462
00:19:14,054 --> 00:19:15,823
AMEN TO THAT!
463
00:19:15,856 --> 00:19:17,524
40 YEARS LATER,
464
00:19:17,557 --> 00:19:20,560
YOU TWO MORONS
ARE STILL CARRYING ON
THE SAME GRUDGE?!
465
00:19:20,593 --> 00:19:21,829
GIVE IT A REST!
466
00:19:21,862 --> 00:19:23,931
WHAT, YOU DON'T LIKE
EACH OTHER? BOO-HOO!
467
00:19:23,964 --> 00:19:26,599
SUCK IT UP.
YOU'RE FAMILY!
468
00:19:26,633 --> 00:19:29,770
DON'T GET ME STARTED.
469
00:19:29,803 --> 00:19:31,705
HARRY,
470
00:19:31,739 --> 00:19:34,041
YOU ARE SO RIGHT.
471
00:19:34,074 --> 00:19:36,676
THIS TIME LAST WEEK
I DIDN'T EVEN HAVE
A FAMILY.
472
00:19:36,710 --> 00:19:40,380
AND NOW HERE I AM,
READY TO REJECT YOU ALL
473
00:19:40,413 --> 00:19:43,250
JUST BECAUSE YOU DON'T MEET
MY STUPID EXPECTATIONS.
474
00:19:43,283 --> 00:19:46,086
YEAH, YOU GUYS HAVE
BOTH GOT A POINT.
475
00:19:46,119 --> 00:19:47,687
THIS FAMILY'S BEEN
SPLIT UP TOO LONG.
476
00:19:47,721 --> 00:19:50,824
IN FACT, I DON'T EVEN
REMEMBER WHY ANYMORE.
477
00:19:50,858 --> 00:19:55,062
DICK, YOU MAY NOT BE
MY KIND OF GUY,
478
00:19:55,095 --> 00:19:56,964
BUT YOU'RE A SOLOMON.
479
00:19:56,997 --> 00:20:00,067
AND THERE'S NOT MUCH
I CAN DO ABOUT THAT.
480
00:20:00,100 --> 00:20:01,534
SAME HERE, JACOB.
481
00:20:01,568 --> 00:20:05,238
YOU MAY BE KIND OF CREEPY,
BUT YOU'RE FAMILY.
482
00:20:05,272 --> 00:20:07,074
COUSIN?
COUSIN.
483
00:20:07,107 --> 00:20:08,842
WELL, THAT'S MORE LIKE IT.
484
00:20:08,876 --> 00:20:10,510
OH, JACOB!
485
00:20:16,449 --> 00:20:16,984
AAH!
486
00:20:17,017 --> 00:20:18,418
GET AWAY FROM ME!
487
00:20:22,555 --> 00:20:23,623
WELL, GOOD-BYE NOW,
SALLY.
488
00:20:23,656 --> 00:20:25,793
BYE-BYE, JENNY.
489
00:20:25,826 --> 00:20:26,426
IT WAS REALLY GREAT
MEETING YOU, SALLY.
490
00:20:26,459 --> 00:20:27,895
YEAH, YOU, TOO,
MICHELLE.
491
00:20:27,928 --> 00:20:29,863
HEY...
492
00:20:29,897 --> 00:20:32,966
IF ANYTHING SHOULD
HAPPEN TO JENNY...
493
00:20:33,000 --> 00:20:36,069
YOU KNOW?
494
00:20:36,103 --> 00:20:37,604
GIVE ME A CALL.
495
00:20:39,539 --> 00:20:43,777
GOOD-BYE, RICHARD.
I'M SO GLAD YOU CAME.
496
00:20:43,811 --> 00:20:46,113
IT'S NICE TO BE
ONE FAMILY AGAIN.
497
00:20:46,146 --> 00:20:47,680
OH, IT SURE IS.
498
00:20:47,714 --> 00:20:49,049
GOOD-BYE, SYLVIA.
499
00:20:49,082 --> 00:20:50,450
GOOD-BYE.
500
00:20:50,483 --> 00:20:52,185
YOU KNOW, MARY,
501
00:20:52,219 --> 00:20:54,888
THE GREAT THING
ABOUT REDISCOVERING
YOUR ROOTS IS
502
00:20:54,922 --> 00:20:57,891
YOU SUDDENLY HAVE
A WHOLE NEW WORLD
OF PEOPLE TO BLAME
503
00:20:57,925 --> 00:21:00,994
FOR, YOU KNOW,
EVERYTHING.
504
00:21:01,761 --> 00:21:02,729
HARRY.
505
00:21:02,762 --> 00:21:03,663
ABE.
506
00:21:03,696 --> 00:21:05,698
I WANT YOU
TO HAVE THESE.
507
00:21:05,732 --> 00:21:08,501
OHH, THAT'S SO NICE.
508
00:21:08,535 --> 00:21:11,638
AWW, I'M GONNA MISS YOU,
UNCLE ABE.
509
00:21:11,671 --> 00:21:15,542
OH, DON'T GET ME STARTED
WITH THAT EMOTIONAL CRAP.
510
00:21:15,575 --> 00:21:17,377
IT'S TOO LATE!
511
00:21:17,410 --> 00:21:19,512
I'VE ALREADY STARTED!
512
00:21:26,619 --> 00:21:28,788
JANINE, HI. IT'S TOMMY.
513
00:21:28,822 --> 00:21:31,024
UH, FROM THE REUNION?
514
00:21:31,058 --> 00:21:33,560
RIGHT, YEAH,
THE ONE WHO TOLD YOU
YOU WERE ADOPTED, RIGHT.
515
00:21:33,593 --> 00:21:37,064
ANYWAY. SAY, UH, YOU
WANNA GO OUT ON SUNDAY?
516
00:21:37,097 --> 00:21:39,867
OH, MEETING YOUR
BIRTH MOTHER, HUH?
517
00:21:39,900 --> 00:21:41,168
WELL, LISTEN, CAN IT WAIT?
518
00:21:41,201 --> 00:21:44,972
YOU KNOW,
IT'S BEEN 16 YEARS.
WHAT'S ANOTHER DAY, RIGHT?
519
00:21:45,005 --> 00:21:46,339
UH, WELL, MAYBE
I COULD COME, YOU KNOW?
520
00:21:46,373 --> 00:21:48,741
WE COULD CATCH A MOVIE,
SWING BY YOUR BIRTH MOM'S.
521
00:21:48,775 --> 00:21:50,844
HELLO? HELLO? HEL--
522
00:21:50,878 --> 00:21:52,846
OH, MAN. GOT CUT OFF.
35843
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