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1
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Adult Adam: "Ferris Bueller's day off."
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The epic '80s teen movie
3
00:00:05,244 --> 00:00:07,579
by the epic '80s teen-movie
director John Hughes.
4
00:00:07,580 --> 00:00:10,849
Ferris was effortlessly cool,
confident, and charismatic,
5
00:00:10,850 --> 00:00:12,751
and every teenage boy wanted to be him,
6
00:00:12,752 --> 00:00:14,786
especially me and Barry.
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Both with TV: You're Abe Froman?
8
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That's right. I'm Abe Froman.
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00:00:18,090 --> 00:00:19,824
The sausage king of Chicago?
10
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Yeah. That's me.
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[Both laugh]
12
00:00:23,829 --> 00:00:26,931
Oh my God! Ferris is so awesome.
13
00:00:26,932 --> 00:00:29,734
One day, I'm gonna eat
in a fancy restaurant.
14
00:00:29,735 --> 00:00:32,571
And one day, I'm gonna be able
to pull off this beret,
15
00:00:32,572 --> 00:00:34,071
just like Ferris.
16
00:00:34,072 --> 00:00:35,539
Never! Only I can pull that off!
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Give me mom's beret!
18
00:00:36,708 --> 00:00:38,008
Yep, we constantly fought about
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which one of us was most like Ferris.
20
00:00:39,911 --> 00:00:41,445
Are you kidding me right now?
21
00:00:41,446 --> 00:00:44,048
In what world are you the Ferris?
22
00:00:44,049 --> 00:00:46,784
Duh... we're both cool,
we both date hot ladies,
23
00:00:46,785 --> 00:00:48,385
and we both have horrible sisters.
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00:00:48,386 --> 00:00:49,954
All of that applies to me, too.
25
00:00:49,955 --> 00:00:53,723
Pfft! If anything, you're the sickly,
goober best friend, Cameron.
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00:00:53,724 --> 00:00:54,891
Me?
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00:00:54,892 --> 00:00:56,126
You're the emotional wreck
28
00:00:56,127 --> 00:00:58,261
who wears a hockey Jersey all the time.
29
00:00:58,262 --> 00:00:59,629
That's classic Cameron, dude.
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Don't you dare call me
the Cameron, Cameron!
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I'm Ferris, bro. Deal with it.
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Deal with this.
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[Toilet flushes]
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Aah!
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But in reality, I wasn't Ferris.
36
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I was this.
37
00:01:11,408 --> 00:01:13,609
Hey, guys! Want to be in
the school's video time capsule?
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It'll be a learning tool
for future generations.
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Yeah, you're a learning tool
for all generations.
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[Laughter] Good one.
41
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Dude, enough with the camera.
42
00:01:21,952 --> 00:01:26,155
It's creepy and intrusive
and weird... just like you.
43
00:01:26,156 --> 00:01:28,543
Thank you for the feedback.
44
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While I knew I was miles from Ferris,
45
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Barry lived in a straight-up fantasyland.
46
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'Sup, math club?
47
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Calcu-later!
48
00:01:40,136 --> 00:01:41,837
'Sup, band geeks?
49
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Staying out of treble? [Trouble]
50
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I have no idea who you are.
51
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Hey, lover girl!
52
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How ya been?
53
00:01:47,910 --> 00:01:50,044
Awful. I just got
voted onto the homecoming court.
54
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We made it?! Yes!
55
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I'm gonna need a big crown, you know.
56
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'Cause I have a huge head.
57
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Oh, wow. You really, um,
misread that badly.
58
00:01:58,687 --> 00:02:00,154
You lost... like, big-time.
59
00:02:00,155 --> 00:02:02,256
Anthony Balsamo won in a landslide.
60
00:02:02,257 --> 00:02:03,658
Wait.
61
00:02:03,659 --> 00:02:05,259
You and your dreamy ex-boyfriend
62
00:02:05,260 --> 00:02:06,928
are sharing a float in the parade?
63
00:02:06,929 --> 00:02:08,796
Together?!
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00:02:08,797 --> 00:02:11,432
That's the most romantic
of all modes of transportation!
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00:02:11,433 --> 00:02:13,267
Chill! We were a disaster when we dated.
66
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We never talked. All we did was make out.
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This is not getting better!
68
00:02:16,471 --> 00:02:18,739
Um, you're on the homecoming court?
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I thought we agreed it was
for stupid, lame losers.
70
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[Scoffs] It's totally
for stupid, lame losers.
71
00:02:23,411 --> 00:02:24,511
Then why are you doing it?
72
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I wanted to be a part of it.
73
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Yeah, well, so do I!
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But you're not supposed to admit it.
75
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So... are we still sure that I didn't win?
76
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- Yes!
- Yes.
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All right. I'm gonna
go help make the float.
78
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So lame... and fun.
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[Squeals]
80
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Ugggggh!
81
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This sucks!
82
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I can't compete with Anthony Balsamo.
83
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He's a dreamboat.
84
00:02:42,997 --> 00:02:44,564
Well, if it makes you feel better,
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you and Lainey lasted way longer
than I thought.
86
00:02:46,700 --> 00:02:49,169
Well, I'm gonna be even more dreamboatier
87
00:02:49,170 --> 00:02:50,837
than Anthony Balsamo.
88
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I'm gonna be... Ferris Bueller.
89
00:02:54,308 --> 00:02:56,276
It's time I have an epic day off.
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00:02:56,277 --> 00:02:59,311
Good luck, knob. Mom will
catch you in two seconds.
91
00:02:59,312 --> 00:03:03,349
Spoken like Ferris' shockingly
unlikable sister, Jennifer Grey.
92
00:03:03,350 --> 00:03:04,850
I want out of this family.
93
00:03:04,851 --> 00:03:08,621
That's literally
something Jennifer Grey says.
94
00:03:08,622 --> 00:03:12,658
[Yello's "Oh Yeah" plays] A day off is
exactly what I need to get my mojo back.
95
00:03:12,659 --> 00:03:14,560
Life moves pretty fast.
96
00:03:14,561 --> 00:03:16,629
If you don't stop
and look around once in a while,
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you could miss it.
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00:03:19,065 --> 00:03:22,133
[Music stops] Again, dude,
I don't know who you are.
99
00:03:22,134 --> 00:03:24,235
I'm Ferris Bueller!
100
00:03:24,236 --> 00:03:26,471
God! Read a book!
101
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The Goldbergs - 02x14
Barry Goldberg's Day
102
00:03:29,675 --> 00:03:32,177
It was April 27, 1980-something,
103
00:03:32,178 --> 00:03:34,179
and my loving smother was walking in
104
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on yet another mess she had to clean up.
105
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I was gone for two minutes!
What the hell happened in here?
106
00:03:40,453 --> 00:03:41,653
We wanted milkshakes,
107
00:03:41,654 --> 00:03:43,588
and we couldn't find the lid
to the blender,
108
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so we just used Barry's hands.
109
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It did not work.
110
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The lid was right here.
You didn't even look for it.
111
00:03:49,128 --> 00:03:50,929
I don't know why I put up with you. I...
112
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Both: "I could have been a lawyer."
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My mom used that catchphrase to remind us
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of the imaginary career
she'd given up to raise us.
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Shhhh!
116
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Stop folding so loudly!
We can't hear the TV!
117
00:04:03,309 --> 00:04:05,076
You know, I did not sign up for this.
118
00:04:05,077 --> 00:04:06,444
I could've been a lawyer!
119
00:04:06,445 --> 00:04:09,247
This is the third time
I'm calling you down for dinner!
120
00:04:09,248 --> 00:04:10,615
Stop ignoring your mother!
121
00:04:10,616 --> 00:04:11,950
I could've been a lawyer!
122
00:04:11,951 --> 00:04:14,052
You know I could have been a lawyer?
123
00:04:16,555 --> 00:04:18,656
Don't get fresh.
124
00:04:18,657 --> 00:04:20,858
I've given up everything for you people.
125
00:04:20,859 --> 00:04:23,027
No offense, but being a lawyer's
like a whole thing,
126
00:04:23,028 --> 00:04:25,163
and you only went
to one semester of college.
127
00:04:25,164 --> 00:04:26,230
I don't believe this.
128
00:04:26,231 --> 00:04:27,432
I would like nothing more
129
00:04:27,433 --> 00:04:29,300
than to be out there in the workforce
130
00:04:29,301 --> 00:04:31,502
with my shoulder-padded power suit
131
00:04:31,503 --> 00:04:33,871
and my thermos full of homemade soup...
132
00:04:33,872 --> 00:04:36,574
Maybe chicken noodle
or maybe a nice bisque.
133
00:04:36,575 --> 00:04:38,509
Or stew.
134
00:04:38,510 --> 00:04:39,844
Probably stew.
135
00:04:39,845 --> 00:04:41,412
And we're back to cooking again.
136
00:04:41,413 --> 00:04:43,514
Admit it... you complain
about doing mom stuff,
137
00:04:43,515 --> 00:04:44,949
but you secretly love it.
138
00:04:44,950 --> 00:04:47,085
I'll have you know that
Virginia Kremp has been trying
139
00:04:47,086 --> 00:04:49,354
to get me to work part time
at the flower shop for years,
140
00:04:49,354 --> 00:04:51,422
and I think it's time
I finally take her up on it.
141
00:04:51,423 --> 00:04:55,893
As of tomorrow, I will
officially start my second job.
142
00:04:55,894 --> 00:04:57,061
What's your first job?
143
00:04:57,062 --> 00:04:58,763
Being a mom!
144
00:04:58,764 --> 00:05:00,598
[Chuckling] Unbelievable.
145
00:05:00,599 --> 00:05:05,069
Tomorrow, I am going to work,
no matter what happens.
146
00:05:05,070 --> 00:05:06,837
How could this happen?
147
00:05:06,838 --> 00:05:09,774
Murray, feel his hands.
They're cold and clammy.
148
00:05:09,775 --> 00:05:11,342
I don't want to get sick.
149
00:05:11,343 --> 00:05:12,777
[Sighs] I'm fine.
150
00:05:12,778 --> 00:05:14,612
I'll get up. [Grunts]
151
00:05:14,613 --> 00:05:16,647
Not a chance, mister. [Whimpers, sighs]
152
00:05:16,648 --> 00:05:18,149
Don't you worry.
153
00:05:18,150 --> 00:05:20,384
Mama's gonna stay right here
and nurse you back to health.
154
00:05:20,385 --> 00:05:21,285
No!
155
00:05:21,286 --> 00:05:23,854
I mean... [weakly] No.
156
00:05:23,855 --> 00:05:25,856
Are you seriously buying this bullcrap?
157
00:05:25,857 --> 00:05:28,792
I mean, he told me in school
he would do this.
158
00:05:28,793 --> 00:05:30,660
He's faking it, like Ferris Bueller.
159
00:05:30,661 --> 00:05:32,195
Erica?
160
00:05:32,196 --> 00:05:33,830
Is that you?
161
00:05:33,831 --> 00:05:36,099
Please don't be upset with me.
162
00:05:36,100 --> 00:05:38,668
You have your health. Be thankful.
163
00:05:38,669 --> 00:05:41,204
That's literally a line from the movie!
164
00:05:41,205 --> 00:05:43,339
Please just watch the movie.
It's all in the movie.
165
00:05:43,340 --> 00:05:45,742
We don't have time
to watch movies right now.
166
00:05:45,743 --> 00:05:48,578
Clearly, your brother
is very sick and needs his rest.
167
00:05:48,579 --> 00:05:51,180
Now go eat breakfast
and get to school. Move!
168
00:05:51,181 --> 00:05:52,381
[Scoffs]
169
00:05:52,382 --> 00:05:55,350
Bevy, it's your first day of work.
170
00:05:55,351 --> 00:05:57,253
I'm not gonna let the moron ruin it.
171
00:05:57,254 --> 00:05:58,687
I'll stay with him, okay?
172
00:05:58,688 --> 00:06:00,823
But he needs constant care.
173
00:06:00,824 --> 00:06:02,925
All you'll do is loaf around in your chair,
174
00:06:02,926 --> 00:06:05,628
watch hours of television,
and eat whatever you want.
175
00:06:05,629 --> 00:06:09,031
In that moment, my dad realized
my mom was right.
176
00:06:09,032 --> 00:06:11,133
This could be his day off, too.
177
00:06:11,134 --> 00:06:12,968
I'm incredibly offended.
178
00:06:12,969 --> 00:06:16,805
Just to prove you wrong,
I will stay with Barry all day.
179
00:06:18,141 --> 00:06:20,075
Feel better, but don't stop needing me!
180
00:06:21,477 --> 00:06:24,146
[Groans]
181
00:06:24,147 --> 00:06:25,147
["Oh Yeah" plays]
182
00:06:25,148 --> 00:06:26,515
They bought it.
183
00:06:26,516 --> 00:06:29,717
The key to faking out
the parents is the clammy hands.
184
00:06:29,718 --> 00:06:31,352
You fake a stomach cramp,
185
00:06:31,353 --> 00:06:32,887
and when you're bent over moaning,
186
00:06:32,888 --> 00:06:34,122
you lick your palms.
187
00:06:34,123 --> 00:06:36,491
It's a little childish, but, hey...
188
00:06:36,492 --> 00:06:37,659
[Music stops] Stop!
189
00:06:37,660 --> 00:06:39,560
I told you, man... Stop touching my camera!
190
00:06:39,561 --> 00:06:41,496
You're not Ferris!
191
00:06:41,497 --> 00:06:43,965
Now all Barry had to do
was outsmart my old man.
192
00:06:43,966 --> 00:06:45,966
Later.
193
00:06:45,967 --> 00:06:47,868
Have fun with your thing, Erica.
194
00:06:47,869 --> 00:06:49,937
That part was beyond easy.
195
00:06:49,938 --> 00:06:52,840
Next, Barry headed over
to pops' retirement community
196
00:06:52,841 --> 00:06:54,475
to pick up some sweet wheels.
197
00:06:54,476 --> 00:06:56,410
Hey. How you doin'?
198
00:06:56,411 --> 00:06:57,511
Barry Goldberg.
199
00:06:59,614 --> 00:07:00,914
Give me your firebird.
200
00:07:00,915 --> 00:07:01,548
Okay.
201
00:07:01,549 --> 00:07:02,583
Wow.
202
00:07:02,584 --> 00:07:04,852
I...[Chuckles] Didn't expect that.
203
00:07:04,853 --> 00:07:06,019
Okay.
204
00:07:06,020 --> 00:07:07,121
Thing is, is I'm skipping school,
205
00:07:07,122 --> 00:07:08,655
and you can't tell anyone.
206
00:07:08,656 --> 00:07:10,223
That may be a little difficult.
207
00:07:10,224 --> 00:07:11,725
I'm taking the day off, too.
208
00:07:11,726 --> 00:07:13,827
What?! You're stealing my thing!
209
00:07:13,828 --> 00:07:16,429
Your thing? I'm the one
that needs the day off.
210
00:07:16,430 --> 00:07:18,823
You're a dumb kid!
Your problems are meaningless.
211
00:07:18,824 --> 00:07:20,333
It's been brought to my attention
212
00:07:20,334 --> 00:07:23,403
that my whole being might not
be well-received at school.
213
00:07:23,404 --> 00:07:24,904
Just like Cameron.
214
00:07:24,905 --> 00:07:27,607
Admit it. Admit you're the Cameron.
215
00:07:27,608 --> 00:07:30,243
My leopard vest and boyish charm
say otherwise.
216
00:07:30,244 --> 00:07:32,044
That's my look! I'm Ferris!
217
00:07:32,045 --> 00:07:34,013
Enough. I'll be the Camden.
218
00:07:34,014 --> 00:07:36,248
The two of you can be the Fergus.
219
00:07:36,249 --> 00:07:37,583
Does that mean you'll help us?
220
00:07:37,584 --> 00:07:39,785
Normally, I wouldn't
let you kids skip school,
221
00:07:39,786 --> 00:07:43,022
but let's be honest...
You both need a day off.
222
00:07:43,023 --> 00:07:44,824
Well, then, let's hit the road.
223
00:07:44,825 --> 00:07:46,692
["Oh Yeah" plays]
224
00:07:52,099 --> 00:07:55,367
If you have the means, I highly
recommend picking one up.
225
00:07:55,368 --> 00:07:57,836
I did. It's mine.
226
00:07:57,837 --> 00:07:59,338
[Engine turns over, revs]
227
00:08:04,677 --> 00:08:05,878
Bow, bow
228
00:08:05,879 --> 00:08:08,180
Chik, chika-chika
229
00:08:08,181 --> 00:08:10,749
Do you have a kiss for daddy?
230
00:08:10,750 --> 00:08:13,452
Not now, Barry. I just got a call.
231
00:08:13,453 --> 00:08:14,753
My grandmother passed.
232
00:08:14,754 --> 00:08:17,288
That was me!
233
00:08:17,289 --> 00:08:19,357
I called the school so you could skip.
234
00:08:19,358 --> 00:08:20,925
Wait... so meemaw's not dead?
235
00:08:20,926 --> 00:08:22,293
No!
236
00:08:22,294 --> 00:08:23,661
I assume not.
237
00:08:23,662 --> 00:08:25,663
I don't have eyes on her, but most likely.
238
00:08:25,664 --> 00:08:27,999
Oh, my God. What is wrong with you?
239
00:08:28,000 --> 00:08:29,768
It's what Ferris does,
and everyone loves him for it.
240
00:08:29,769 --> 00:08:30,935
Idiot!
241
00:08:30,936 --> 00:08:32,570
Lainey's grandmother helped raise her,
242
00:08:32,571 --> 00:08:33,938
and you just told the school
243
00:08:33,939 --> 00:08:35,507
that she got flattened by a semi.
244
00:08:35,508 --> 00:08:37,975
Come on. I need my Sloane.
245
00:08:37,976 --> 00:08:40,912
I even got you a distracting
white fringe jacket.
246
00:08:40,913 --> 00:08:43,381
I can't leave, okay? It's homecoming.
247
00:08:43,382 --> 00:08:44,949
Plus, I have to call my aunt
248
00:08:44,950 --> 00:08:46,918
and tell her that her mother is alive.
249
00:08:46,919 --> 00:08:48,653
[Sighs]
250
00:08:48,654 --> 00:08:49,687
You suck at this.
251
00:08:49,688 --> 00:08:51,289
Shut up!
252
00:08:51,290 --> 00:08:53,424
But he's right. Let's just go home.
253
00:08:53,425 --> 00:08:56,360
No! We got a day off to have, kiddo.
254
00:08:56,361 --> 00:08:58,596
Wait... you're actually
encouraging them both
255
00:08:58,597 --> 00:08:59,697
to skip school?
256
00:08:59,698 --> 00:09:02,133
Sorry, sweetheart. They need this.
257
00:09:02,134 --> 00:09:04,902
God, I am so sick of everyone
bending over backwards
258
00:09:04,903 --> 00:09:07,471
for these two losers
because they fail at life.
259
00:09:07,472 --> 00:09:09,106
Whatever, Jennifer Grey.
260
00:09:09,107 --> 00:09:11,142
Have fun in school while we live it up.
261
00:09:11,143 --> 00:09:14,478
Fine! You want me to be
Jennifer Grey, you'll get her.
262
00:09:14,478 --> 00:09:17,046
But not the awesome one in "Dirty Dancing."
263
00:09:17,047 --> 00:09:18,816
[Engine revs, tires squeal]
Chik, chika-chika
264
00:09:18,817 --> 00:09:21,118
And that was my fringe jacket!
265
00:09:23,668 --> 00:09:25,532
After a bit of a shaky start,
266
00:09:25,533 --> 00:09:27,034
Barry's day off was under way.
267
00:09:27,035 --> 00:09:30,036
With me at his side,
we would take Philly by storm
268
00:09:30,037 --> 00:09:31,103
and relive the movie.
269
00:09:31,104 --> 00:09:32,538
First up was the museum.
270
00:09:32,539 --> 00:09:33,739
Oh, yeah
271
00:09:35,542 --> 00:09:36,809
Oh, yeah
272
00:09:38,378 --> 00:09:40,413
The moon
273
00:09:40,414 --> 00:09:41,681
Where are the boobs?
274
00:09:42,983 --> 00:09:43,783
Where are the boobs?
275
00:09:44,785 --> 00:09:46,485
Where are the boobs?
276
00:09:46,486 --> 00:09:48,554
Unfortunately, trying to
re-create your favorite scene
277
00:09:48,555 --> 00:09:50,222
from a movie isn't as easy as you'd think.
278
00:09:50,223 --> 00:09:52,692
- Just take my hand!
- Stranger danger!
279
00:09:52,693 --> 00:09:54,326
- Hey! Come here!
- It's from a movie!
280
00:09:54,327 --> 00:09:56,762
Next up was the Phillies,
and it was gonna be legendary.
281
00:09:56,763 --> 00:09:58,931
Hey, batter! Hey, batter!
282
00:09:58,932 --> 00:10:01,000
S-wing, batter!
283
00:10:01,001 --> 00:10:03,569
Hey, butter! Hey, butter!
284
00:10:03,570 --> 00:10:05,204
S-weet, butter!
285
00:10:05,205 --> 00:10:07,439
Are you saying "sweet butter"?
286
00:10:07,440 --> 00:10:09,308
Shut up. I don't know sports.
287
00:10:09,309 --> 00:10:10,809
[Bat cracks, crowd cheers]
288
00:10:10,810 --> 00:10:13,178
Foul ball! Look alive, boys!
289
00:10:14,547 --> 00:10:15,547
Yes!
290
00:10:15,548 --> 00:10:17,449
[Crowd booing]
291
00:10:17,450 --> 00:10:19,251
But, unfortunately for us,
292
00:10:19,252 --> 00:10:22,911
the day was becoming legendary
for all the wrong reasons.
293
00:10:25,425 --> 00:10:28,193
And we weren't the only ones
struggling that day.
294
00:10:28,894 --> 00:10:30,695
You okay? You seem blue.
295
00:10:30,696 --> 00:10:32,697
It's just... Barry's sick,
296
00:10:32,698 --> 00:10:35,200
and I feel really guilty being here.
297
00:10:35,201 --> 00:10:37,569
Aw, honey. Welcome to being a working mama.
298
00:10:38,470 --> 00:10:40,104
You want to get out of that house,
299
00:10:40,105 --> 00:10:41,438
and then when you do,
300
00:10:41,439 --> 00:10:43,540
you can't help but feel
like you're missing out, right?
301
00:10:43,541 --> 00:10:45,609
Thanks, Ginny.
It's nice to know I'm not alone.
302
00:10:45,610 --> 00:10:46,910
[Chuckles]
303
00:10:46,911 --> 00:10:50,347
And here I was, ready to bail
and go check on him.
304
00:10:50,348 --> 00:10:53,383
[Both laughing]
305
00:10:53,384 --> 00:10:54,451
Come on.
306
00:10:54,452 --> 00:10:55,686
Oh, Bev.
307
00:10:55,687 --> 00:10:57,087
No, your family will
still be there to love you
308
00:10:57,088 --> 00:10:58,121
when you get home.
309
00:10:58,122 --> 00:10:59,523
That means a lot.
310
00:10:59,524 --> 00:11:00,524
[Chuckles]
311
00:11:00,525 --> 00:11:02,125
In fact, you've inspired me.
312
00:11:02,126 --> 00:11:04,628
I think I'm gonna take the van
and do some deliveries...
313
00:11:04,629 --> 00:11:06,496
Or whatever it is you do with a van.
314
00:11:06,497 --> 00:11:07,464
'Kay. Bye.
315
00:11:07,465 --> 00:11:09,499
Wait! You forgot the flowers!
316
00:11:09,500 --> 00:11:12,235
As my mom was ditching
the first day of her new job,
317
00:11:12,236 --> 00:11:13,971
we were making a last-ditch effort
318
00:11:13,972 --> 00:11:17,774
to get a tiny taste of Ferris Bueller.
319
00:11:17,775 --> 00:11:19,376
[Keys jingle]
320
00:11:19,377 --> 00:11:20,744
Keep it close, pal.
321
00:11:20,745 --> 00:11:22,045
[Classical music playing]
322
00:11:22,046 --> 00:11:23,280
Hello. May I help you?
323
00:11:23,281 --> 00:11:24,614
Yes, my good man.
324
00:11:24,615 --> 00:11:25,882
I am Abe Froman,
325
00:11:25,882 --> 00:11:28,184
the cheesesteak King of Philadelphia.
326
00:11:28,185 --> 00:11:31,655
And I am Gabe Froman,
the emperor of soft pretzels.
327
00:11:31,656 --> 00:11:32,989
Get out of here! You're terrible!
328
00:11:32,990 --> 00:11:35,225
Take it easy, ferguses.
329
00:11:35,226 --> 00:11:39,028
Ma?tre d': Hmm. I don't see
those names on my list.
330
00:11:39,029 --> 00:11:40,397
But that's fine.
331
00:11:40,398 --> 00:11:42,799
We have a beautiful table
for you right by the window.
332
00:11:42,800 --> 00:11:44,233
Whoa! Whoa!
333
00:11:44,234 --> 00:11:45,935
You're gonna seat us just like that?
334
00:11:45,936 --> 00:11:47,937
He just said he's the Pretzel Emperor.
335
00:11:47,938 --> 00:11:49,806
That's not even a thing.
336
00:11:49,807 --> 00:11:52,742
Well, we pride ourselves on
accommodating all of our guests.
337
00:11:52,743 --> 00:11:54,343
So, if you'll follow me...
338
00:11:54,344 --> 00:11:56,879
No, sir, I will not follow you!
339
00:11:56,880 --> 00:11:58,781
Make it difficult for us to sit.
340
00:11:58,782 --> 00:12:01,651
Yeah! We need to outsmart you
with our comedic shenanigans.
341
00:12:01,652 --> 00:12:03,653
I'm sorry. I don't understand
what's happening right now.
342
00:12:03,654 --> 00:12:07,323
You're supposed to act snooty
and threaten to call the police.
343
00:12:07,324 --> 00:12:09,591
I would never call the police.
344
00:12:09,592 --> 00:12:12,895
Now, if you and the Pretzel
Emperor will follow me...
345
00:12:12,896 --> 00:12:14,563
Call the police! I demand it!
346
00:12:14,564 --> 00:12:15,665
Don't call the police.
347
00:12:15,666 --> 00:12:17,834
- Call the police!
- Don't call the police.
348
00:12:17,834 --> 00:12:19,768
We'll just get our car from valet.
349
00:12:19,769 --> 00:12:21,737
We don't have a valet.
350
00:12:21,738 --> 00:12:23,939
Then you better call the police.
351
00:12:23,940 --> 00:12:25,507
And with one simple toss of the keys...
352
00:12:25,508 --> 00:12:26,942
Keep it close, pal.
353
00:12:26,943 --> 00:12:30,122
Barry was completely robbed of his day off.
354
00:12:31,781 --> 00:12:35,450
[Triumphant music playing]
355
00:12:35,451 --> 00:12:38,120
Unlike the movie, the firebird
was never seen again.
356
00:12:38,121 --> 00:12:40,489
[Tires squeal]
357
00:12:40,490 --> 00:12:42,324
Even worse, my mom was flying home
358
00:12:42,325 --> 00:12:45,260
to give her sick little schmoopie some tlc.
359
00:12:45,261 --> 00:12:46,294
[Thud]
360
00:12:46,295 --> 00:12:47,896
Beverly: Ow! I hurt my bottom!
361
00:12:47,897 --> 00:12:52,601
But she had promised my dad she
wouldn't walk through that front door
362
00:12:53,402 --> 00:12:55,336
[snorts] To go see Barry
before the workday was done.
363
00:12:55,337 --> 00:12:56,971
[Snoring]
364
00:12:56,972 --> 00:12:59,206
So instead, she decided
to climb the trellis
365
00:12:59,207 --> 00:13:00,775
and go through the window.
366
00:13:01,710 --> 00:13:03,010
Oh!
367
00:13:03,011 --> 00:13:04,512
Oh, poop!
368
00:13:04,513 --> 00:13:07,014
Mama's coming, baby.
369
00:13:07,015 --> 00:13:09,450
Oh, it's in my pantyhose! Damn it!
370
00:13:09,451 --> 00:13:11,852
We are definitely overwatering this lawn.
371
00:13:11,853 --> 00:13:12,887
My pedicure!
372
00:13:12,888 --> 00:13:14,422
Ow! Ow! Ow!
373
00:13:21,596 --> 00:13:23,564
How's work going?
374
00:13:23,565 --> 00:13:24,532
[Door closes]
375
00:13:24,533 --> 00:13:26,800
I told you... he's fine.
376
00:13:26,801 --> 00:13:29,069
Something's wrong.
He didn't come to the window.
377
00:13:29,070 --> 00:13:31,471
I've got to get up there
and put my lips on his forehead.
378
00:13:31,472 --> 00:13:33,573
It's the only way to get
an accurate temperature.
379
00:13:33,574 --> 00:13:35,475
You can't stay away, can you?
380
00:13:35,476 --> 00:13:36,843
You're crazy.
381
00:13:36,844 --> 00:13:39,646
If stealing a van and trying
to break into my own home
382
00:13:39,647 --> 00:13:41,348
so I can snuggle my boy is crazy,
383
00:13:41,349 --> 00:13:42,883
then I don't want to be sane.
384
00:13:42,884 --> 00:13:44,251
You stole a van?
385
00:13:44,252 --> 00:13:45,952
No time to explain, mostly
'cause it makes me look bad.
386
00:13:45,953 --> 00:13:47,687
Barry needs me!
387
00:13:47,688 --> 00:13:50,390
Luckily, my brother had
followed the movie to a "T"
388
00:13:50,391 --> 00:13:52,792
and rigged an elaborate
pulley system to a mannequin
389
00:13:52,793 --> 00:13:53,960
to fake out my mom.
390
00:13:53,961 --> 00:13:56,329
[Barry snoring]
391
00:14:01,335 --> 00:14:03,536
See? The kid's totally fine.
392
00:14:03,537 --> 00:14:04,771
Really?
393
00:14:04,772 --> 00:14:06,672
But Beverly Goldberg was a lot smarter
394
00:14:06,673 --> 00:14:07,907
than the mom in the movie.
395
00:14:07,908 --> 00:14:09,075
[Snoring continues]
396
00:14:09,076 --> 00:14:10,243
[Telephone rings]
397
00:14:10,244 --> 00:14:11,910
Hello?
398
00:14:11,911 --> 00:14:13,512
Barry's ditching school.
399
00:14:13,513 --> 00:14:14,647
Wow.
400
00:14:14,648 --> 00:14:16,415
Thank you for telling me nothing of note.
401
00:14:16,416 --> 00:14:17,783
Did you even hear what I said?
402
00:14:17,784 --> 00:14:19,785
Yes, narc. I'm also ditching work.
403
00:14:19,786 --> 00:14:21,787
Are you gonna tattle on me, too?
404
00:14:21,788 --> 00:14:24,707
But I... get back to
class, or you're grounded.
405
00:14:30,997 --> 00:14:33,732
What do you mean, the car's
already been reported stolen?
406
00:14:33,733 --> 00:14:35,867
The question is,
how did you know it was stolen?
407
00:14:35,868 --> 00:14:36,968
I didn't.
408
00:14:36,969 --> 00:14:38,937
I mean, I did, because I reported it,
409
00:14:38,938 --> 00:14:40,672
but I didn't really.
410
00:14:40,673 --> 00:14:41,973
I'm gonna go.
411
00:14:41,974 --> 00:14:43,542
No, you're gonna wait for someone
412
00:14:43,543 --> 00:14:44,843
to come and question you.
413
00:14:44,844 --> 00:14:47,112
[Knuckles cracking]
414
00:14:52,485 --> 00:14:54,386
[Cracking continues]
415
00:14:57,189 --> 00:14:58,322
Drugs?
416
00:14:59,725 --> 00:15:01,559
Thank you, no. I'm good.
417
00:15:01,560 --> 00:15:04,162
No, I meant are you in here for drugs?
418
00:15:04,163 --> 00:15:05,896
No.
419
00:15:05,897 --> 00:15:07,398
Why are you here?
420
00:15:07,399 --> 00:15:08,699
Drugs.
421
00:15:10,135 --> 00:15:11,635
So, you gonna tell me your story or what?
422
00:15:11,636 --> 00:15:13,304
Fine. You want to know what's wrong?
423
00:15:13,305 --> 00:15:15,306
I know what's wrong.
I just want to hear you say it.
424
00:15:15,307 --> 00:15:17,908
In a nutshell, I hate my brothers.
425
00:15:17,909 --> 00:15:19,643
They think my life is so easy,
426
00:15:19,644 --> 00:15:21,711
but I have problems, like everyone else.
427
00:15:21,712 --> 00:15:23,947
- Like what?
- My friend got on the homecoming court,
428
00:15:23,948 --> 00:15:26,884
and I didn't go out for it
because we both agreed it's stupid.
429
00:15:26,885 --> 00:15:28,544
- Well, then, what's the problem?
- I don't know.
430
00:15:28,545 --> 00:15:30,591
I guess, deep down,
I really wanted to be on it.
431
00:15:30,592 --> 00:15:32,293
Then why didn't you go for it?
432
00:15:32,294 --> 00:15:33,862
If there's one thing I know,
433
00:15:33,863 --> 00:15:36,860
being on the Junior royal Court
opens a lot of doors.
434
00:15:36,861 --> 00:15:37,961
'Cause it's lame.
435
00:15:37,962 --> 00:15:40,997
And I didn't want people to make fun of me.
436
00:15:40,998 --> 00:15:42,332
But I guess that's what I do.
437
00:15:42,333 --> 00:15:45,435
Instead of taking risks,
I just keep my head down.
438
00:15:46,504 --> 00:15:48,939
Maybe that's why Barry bothers me so much.
439
00:15:48,940 --> 00:15:50,907
He's not afraid to look like an idiot.
440
00:15:50,908 --> 00:15:52,342
Well, if you ask me,
441
00:15:52,343 --> 00:15:54,210
you ought to spend more time
worrying about yourself
442
00:15:54,211 --> 00:15:56,980
and less time worrying about your brother.
443
00:15:56,981 --> 00:15:58,949
All right, you're free to go.
444
00:15:58,950 --> 00:16:00,350
It's about time.
445
00:16:00,351 --> 00:16:03,419
Feels like I've been sitting
here for 30 [Bleep] years.
446
00:16:03,420 --> 00:16:05,288
Chika-chika, bow, bow
447
00:16:05,289 --> 00:16:07,223
Meanwhile, Barry became so depressed
448
00:16:07,224 --> 00:16:09,192
that he'd never be Ferris Bueller,
449
00:16:09,193 --> 00:16:11,594
he became catatonic.
450
00:16:11,595 --> 00:16:14,163
Come on. It's not that bad.
451
00:16:14,164 --> 00:16:16,032
We had a great day.
452
00:16:16,033 --> 00:16:17,533
Barry went comatose,
453
00:16:17,534 --> 00:16:20,603
we got pelted with garbage on national TV,
454
00:16:20,604 --> 00:16:22,371
and someone stole your car.
455
00:16:22,372 --> 00:16:23,606
Enough!
456
00:16:23,607 --> 00:16:26,509
You can't force a perfect day.
457
00:16:26,510 --> 00:16:29,979
You got to just go out
and live it the best way you can
458
00:16:29,980 --> 00:16:32,248
as you... No one else.
459
00:16:32,249 --> 00:16:34,483
That's exactly what Ferris would say.
460
00:16:34,484 --> 00:16:35,784
Great.
461
00:16:35,785 --> 00:16:39,021
Even our 80-year-old grandfather
is cooler than us.
462
00:16:39,022 --> 00:16:41,156
Man. Look at the guy.
463
00:16:41,157 --> 00:16:42,758
I think he blew a microchip.
464
00:16:42,759 --> 00:16:45,327
You okay, kiddo?
465
00:16:45,328 --> 00:16:46,996
Blink if you can hear me.
466
00:16:46,997 --> 00:16:48,931
Oh, yeah
467
00:16:48,932 --> 00:16:52,101
Oh, yeah
468
00:16:52,102 --> 00:16:53,669
[Music stops]
469
00:16:53,670 --> 00:16:55,137
Did he just... yep.
470
00:16:57,640 --> 00:16:59,108
I'm coming, schmoopie!
471
00:16:59,109 --> 00:17:01,477
Let my body be your life preserver!
472
00:17:01,478 --> 00:17:04,379
Just like Ferris had been
relentlessly tracked down
473
00:17:04,380 --> 00:17:05,614
by principal Rooney,
474
00:17:05,615 --> 00:17:07,983
Barry had been tracked down by my mom.
475
00:17:07,984 --> 00:17:09,518
[Gasping]
476
00:17:09,519 --> 00:17:11,186
Hold on to my bosom
and kick with your legs.
477
00:17:11,187 --> 00:17:13,055
Please! I was about to hit bottom!
478
00:17:13,056 --> 00:17:14,590
Let me breathe air into your lungs.
479
00:17:14,591 --> 00:17:15,490
Gross!
480
00:17:18,224 --> 00:17:19,490
It was official...
481
00:17:19,491 --> 00:17:21,425
Barry's day off was a total failure.
482
00:17:21,426 --> 00:17:23,227
And even worse, my mom ended up
grounding him for a month.
483
00:17:23,228 --> 00:17:29,166
When Barry was in Egypt's land
484
00:17:29,167 --> 00:17:34,071
Let my Barry go
485
00:17:35,171 --> 00:17:36,940
- You okay?
- I'm dying.
486
00:17:36,941 --> 00:17:38,875
Dude, get up. It's homecoming.
487
00:17:38,876 --> 00:17:40,610
You got to be there for Lainey.
488
00:17:40,611 --> 00:17:42,745
What's the point? I'm grounded.
489
00:17:42,746 --> 00:17:45,915
Maybe Ferris can sneak out, but not me.
490
00:17:45,916 --> 00:17:47,617
Not Cameron.
491
00:17:47,618 --> 00:17:49,585
What if I told you
that Ferris isn't even real?
492
00:17:49,586 --> 00:17:51,020
I know. It's just a movie.
493
00:17:51,021 --> 00:17:52,188
That's not what I mean.
494
00:17:52,189 --> 00:17:53,422
There's this theory
495
00:17:53,423 --> 00:17:56,125
that he's just a figment
of Cameron's imagination.
496
00:17:56,126 --> 00:17:57,826
That would make Cameron the hero
497
00:17:57,827 --> 00:17:59,962
and Ferris just the guy he wants to be.
498
00:17:59,963 --> 00:18:04,500
So... even if I'm Cameron,
I can still be Ferris?
499
00:18:04,501 --> 00:18:05,634
Exactly.
500
00:18:05,635 --> 00:18:07,402
Why are you cheering me up?
501
00:18:07,403 --> 00:18:09,871
I met a dude who made me
take a good look at myself.
502
00:18:09,872 --> 00:18:12,240
Just then, my brother realized
Erica was right.
503
00:18:12,241 --> 00:18:14,209
Maybe Barry was Cameron,but that didn't mean
504
00:18:14,210 --> 00:18:16,144
he didn't have a little Ferris in him, too.
505
00:18:16,145 --> 00:18:18,146
Come on. Let's go to homecoming.
506
00:18:18,147 --> 00:18:19,681
You said you were grounded.
507
00:18:19,682 --> 00:18:21,283
Hey, I'm Barry Goldberg,
508
00:18:21,284 --> 00:18:24,085
and if anyone can outsmart mom, it's me.
509
00:18:24,086 --> 00:18:25,153
Later!
510
00:18:25,154 --> 00:18:26,755
Have fun with your thing, Erica.
511
00:18:26,756 --> 00:18:28,823
Once again, Barry had no
problem sneaking past my dad.
512
00:18:28,824 --> 00:18:31,593
Squishy, I know you're grounded,
513
00:18:31,594 --> 00:18:33,562
but that doesn't mean
mama doesn't love you.
514
00:18:33,563 --> 00:18:35,063
[Gasps]
515
00:18:35,064 --> 00:18:37,398
And for 30 seconds,
he had slightly fooled my mom.
516
00:18:37,399 --> 00:18:40,501
[Marching band playing]
517
00:18:40,502 --> 00:18:43,104
[Crowd cheering]
518
00:18:53,515 --> 00:18:55,149
Boyfriend a no-show, huh?
519
00:18:56,017 --> 00:18:57,240
Call me old-fashioned,
520
00:18:57,241 --> 00:19:00,333
but a guy who stands you up
deserves to get cheated on.
521
00:19:00,334 --> 00:19:01,234
[Chuckles]
522
00:19:01,990 --> 00:19:03,257
[Feedback]
523
00:19:03,258 --> 00:19:06,194
["Twist and Shout" plays]
524
00:19:06,195 --> 00:19:07,628
[Marching band stops]
525
00:19:09,730 --> 00:19:13,533
Oh, shake it up, baby, now
526
00:19:13,534 --> 00:19:14,467
Oh, no.
527
00:19:14,468 --> 00:19:16,136
Twist and shout
528
00:19:17,738 --> 00:19:21,274
Come on, come on, come on,
come on, baby, now
529
00:19:21,275 --> 00:19:23,710
Come on and work it on out
530
00:19:25,046 --> 00:19:28,548
Well, work it on out, honey
531
00:19:28,549 --> 00:19:30,850
You know you look so good
532
00:19:30,851 --> 00:19:32,852
This isn't what I meant, you dope!
533
00:19:32,853 --> 00:19:36,155
You know you got me going now
534
00:19:36,156 --> 00:19:37,623
Just like I knew...
535
00:19:37,624 --> 00:19:39,025
Even though Barry was
making a fool of himself,
536
00:19:39,026 --> 00:19:41,327
[cheers and applause] Something
happened he never expected.
537
00:19:41,328 --> 00:19:43,262
Every single person in that audience
538
00:19:43,263 --> 00:19:46,232
loved Ferris Bueller, too.
539
00:19:50,971 --> 00:19:52,838
Uh, who is that crazy dude?
540
00:19:52,839 --> 00:19:54,407
That's my boyfriend.
541
00:19:56,243 --> 00:19:57,777
Ahhhhh
542
00:19:57,778 --> 00:19:58,844
Ahhhhh
543
00:19:58,845 --> 00:20:00,012
He's doing it.
544
00:20:00,013 --> 00:20:01,580
He's actually doing it.
545
00:20:01,581 --> 00:20:03,215
Ahhhhh
546
00:20:03,216 --> 00:20:05,985
Ahhhhhhhhhh
547
00:20:05,986 --> 00:20:07,153
I'll go get him.
548
00:20:07,154 --> 00:20:09,555
No. Let him go.
549
00:20:09,556 --> 00:20:12,591
Sometimes moms need to know
when to take a day off, too.
550
00:20:12,592 --> 00:20:14,593
Come on, come on, come on, come
on, baby, now
sing, baby, sing!
551
00:20:14,594 --> 00:20:15,861
That's when my mom realized
552
00:20:15,862 --> 00:20:17,830
there was a reason she wasn't a lawyer...
553
00:20:17,831 --> 00:20:21,133
She already had the best job in the world.
554
00:20:21,134 --> 00:20:22,601
As for me, I realized
555
00:20:22,602 --> 00:20:25,170
I didn't want to be
Ferris Bueller or Cameron
556
00:20:25,171 --> 00:20:27,405
or anyone else in the movie.
557
00:20:27,406 --> 00:20:28,940
I wanted to be the guy
558
00:20:28,941 --> 00:20:31,543
who sat behind the camera, making it.
559
00:20:31,544 --> 00:20:34,212
I wanted to be John Hughes.
560
00:20:34,213 --> 00:20:36,381
Shake it, shake it, shake it, baby, now
561
00:20:36,382 --> 00:20:40,552
Of course, no one could be,but I might as damn well try.
562
00:20:40,553 --> 00:20:42,354
Ahhhhh
563
00:20:42,355 --> 00:20:44,022
Ahhhhh
564
00:20:44,023 --> 00:20:46,057
Ahhhhh
565
00:20:46,058 --> 00:20:47,959
Ahhhhh
566
00:20:47,960 --> 00:20:51,529
Ahhhhhhhhhh
567
00:20:51,530 --> 00:20:53,531
[Cheers and applause] Whoo!
568
00:20:53,532 --> 00:20:56,101
That's the thing about
the movies we grow up with...
569
00:20:56,102 --> 00:20:58,903
We always wish we could be
part of the fantasy.
570
00:20:58,904 --> 00:21:02,754
And for one brief moment,
my brother actually was.
571
00:21:09,702 --> 00:21:11,803
You're still here?
572
00:21:11,804 --> 00:21:13,505
[Chuckling] It's over.
573
00:21:13,506 --> 00:21:14,739
Go.
574
00:21:14,740 --> 00:21:16,641
Go home. Get out of here.
575
00:21:19,444 --> 00:21:21,180
I don't get why I'm doing this.
576
00:21:21,181 --> 00:21:23,581
Trust me... this will
make you famous one day.
577
00:21:23,581 --> 00:21:26,320
_
578
00:21:26,321 --> 00:21:30,054
That's it. Go home. Get out of here.
You're done. Goodbye!
579
00:21:30,055 --> 00:21:33,562
sync and correction by solfieri
www.addic7ed.com
580
00:21:33,612 --> 00:21:38,162
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
42125
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