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1
00:00:01,328 --> 00:00:05,335
Growning up, my brother fancied himself
quite the ladies man.
2
00:00:05,336 --> 00:00:08,071
Unfortunately,
the only lady who was into him
3
00:00:08,072 --> 00:00:09,071
was this lady.
4
00:00:09,073 --> 00:00:12,475
I know I'm your mother,
but I think I can say this without bias.
5
00:00:12,476 --> 00:00:17,480
Uh, you are an Adonis cut from marble
sent from Heaven to be scrumptious.
6
00:00:17,481 --> 00:00:18,448
[Chuckles]
7
00:00:18,449 --> 00:00:19,549
Oh, you got some schmutz.
8
00:00:19,550 --> 00:00:23,920
Truth is, Barry had absolutely
no game in the woman department.
9
00:00:23,921 --> 00:00:25,455
[Tires screech]
10
00:00:25,456 --> 00:00:27,457
Guess who's gonna be
a professional BMX biker.
11
00:00:27,458 --> 00:00:28,591
Guess who doesn't care.
12
00:00:28,592 --> 00:00:29,993
Okay, then.
13
00:00:29,994 --> 00:00:32,595
Yep... no game whatsoever.
14
00:00:32,596 --> 00:00:35,832
[Rapping]
big tasty wants
to take you on a boat ride
15
00:00:35,833 --> 00:00:39,435
I know it's not good timing
'cause your cat died
16
00:00:39,436 --> 00:00:42,105
Especially when it came to
Erica's best friend, Lainey.
17
00:00:42,106 --> 00:00:45,441
She was the girl he pined after
since first grade.
18
00:00:45,442 --> 00:00:47,843
Unfortunately, it wasn't reciprocated.
19
00:00:47,845 --> 00:00:49,779
Yep... my brother was a lost cause...
20
00:00:49,780 --> 00:00:51,514
Or so we thought.
21
00:00:51,515 --> 00:00:53,082
"General hospital's" on. Get out.
22
00:00:53,083 --> 00:00:54,517
Can't. I'm busy.
23
00:00:54,518 --> 00:00:57,615
Doing what... sitting down here
alone, like a weirdo?
24
00:00:57,617 --> 00:01:00,757
Sometimes I just like to light a candle
and sit with my thoughts.
25
00:01:00,758 --> 00:01:02,191
[Clank]
26
00:01:02,192 --> 00:01:03,493
Erica, wait!
27
00:01:03,494 --> 00:01:04,694
Lainey?!
28
00:01:04,695 --> 00:01:06,496
Hey. [Laughs nervously]
29
00:01:06,497 --> 00:01:09,632
Just looking for my scrunchie.
Guess it's not down there.
30
00:01:09,633 --> 00:01:10,867
It's in your hair.
31
00:01:10,868 --> 00:01:13,634
Oh! [Laughs] So it is.
32
00:01:13,636 --> 00:01:15,270
It's always the last place you look.
33
00:01:15,271 --> 00:01:17,851
- Okay, bye-bye now.
- No, come back!
34
00:01:17,853 --> 00:01:19,775
Hold it right there!
35
00:01:19,776 --> 00:01:22,244
Are you and Barry... together?
36
00:01:22,245 --> 00:01:23,445
No. Not really.
37
00:01:23,446 --> 00:01:26,215
I mean, kinda. He repulses me,
but I'm still drawn to him.
38
00:01:26,216 --> 00:01:27,316
- Ew!
- I know!
39
00:01:27,317 --> 00:01:28,750
H-he's clumsy and annoying
40
00:01:28,751 --> 00:01:31,487
and has those big, brown eyes
and cute dimples when he smiles.
41
00:01:31,488 --> 00:01:32,688
- Ew!
- I know!
42
00:01:32,689 --> 00:01:35,657
Lainey, we're talking about
my brother. This has to stop!
43
00:01:35,658 --> 00:01:36,687
- I know!
- Ew!
44
00:01:36,689 --> 00:01:38,994
I've tried, but I keep
getting pulled back in.
45
00:01:38,995 --> 00:01:41,663
It's like he annoys me so much,
I just want to kiss his stupid face.
46
00:01:41,664 --> 00:01:43,165
- Ew!
- I know!
47
00:01:43,166 --> 00:01:44,078
Ladies.
48
00:01:44,080 --> 00:01:46,708
Can I interest either of you
in an orange crush on ice?
49
00:01:46,710 --> 00:01:47,335
- Ew!
- You!
50
00:01:47,337 --> 00:01:48,971
- Me.
- Gotta go.
51
00:01:48,972 --> 00:01:50,706
You cannot date my best friend.
52
00:01:50,707 --> 00:01:52,941
It's an unholy union! I forbid it!
53
00:01:52,942 --> 00:01:54,109
Please do.
54
00:01:54,110 --> 00:01:55,744
Forbidden love is the best kind of love...
55
00:01:55,745 --> 00:01:57,446
Right after tender and jungle.
56
00:01:57,447 --> 00:01:59,214
[Laughing] Oh!
57
00:01:59,215 --> 00:02:00,249
You're delusional.
58
00:02:00,250 --> 00:02:01,750
Your relationship's not even real.
59
00:02:01,751 --> 00:02:03,752
Why do you think
she's keeping it a secret?
60
00:02:03,753 --> 00:02:06,955
Oh, we'll see how much of a secret it is
after Lainey asks me
61
00:02:06,956 --> 00:02:08,724
to the Darryl Dawkins dance this Friday.
62
00:02:08,725 --> 00:02:09,958
Darryl Dawkins?
63
00:02:09,959 --> 00:02:12,094
Do you mean Sadie Hawkins?
64
00:02:12,095 --> 00:02:15,430
No! I'm talking about the dance
when the girls ask the guys.
65
00:02:15,431 --> 00:02:17,799
It's named after the basketball
player Darryl Dawkins.
66
00:02:17,800 --> 00:02:19,134
Who?
67
00:02:19,135 --> 00:02:21,870
Dr. Dunkenstein, the rim wrecker,
68
00:02:21,871 --> 00:02:23,472
chocolate thunder,
69
00:02:23,473 --> 00:02:25,440
don't fake the funk on a nasty dunk.
70
00:02:25,441 --> 00:02:27,376
Why would a dance
where the girls ask the guys
71
00:02:27,377 --> 00:02:28,977
be named after a basketball player?
72
00:02:28,978 --> 00:02:31,279
'Cause it's like
the ball's in your court, girl.
73
00:02:31,280 --> 00:02:33,048
That actually makes a tiny bit of sense.
74
00:02:33,049 --> 00:02:34,416
But Lainey's not asking you.
75
00:02:34,417 --> 00:02:35,517
Oh, she will.
76
00:02:35,518 --> 00:02:37,719
And we'll dance, and we'll drink punch,
77
00:02:37,720 --> 00:02:40,489
and we'll fall in love,
and we'll get married.
78
00:02:40,490 --> 00:02:41,890
Stop talking.
79
00:02:41,891 --> 00:02:45,026
Keep talking. Who's getting married?
I heard "married," and I came running.
80
00:02:45,027 --> 00:02:45,861
- No one.
- No one.
81
00:02:45,862 --> 00:02:47,396
Well, just so you know,
82
00:02:47,397 --> 00:02:50,365
I've picked out the perfect
person for each of my children,
83
00:02:50,366 --> 00:02:51,800
so whenever you're ready,
84
00:02:51,801 --> 00:02:53,969
I can introduce you to your soul mate.
85
00:02:53,970 --> 00:02:54,803
- Pass!
- Pass.
86
00:02:54,804 --> 00:02:57,472
Come on. Don't you want what
your father and I have?
87
00:02:57,473 --> 00:02:59,241
Murray: Bevy!
88
00:02:59,242 --> 00:03:02,377
I dropped your toothbrush
in the toilet again.
89
00:03:02,378 --> 00:03:05,547
Did you do the right thing and toss it,
or did you put it back in the holder?
90
00:03:05,548 --> 00:03:06,748
The right thing.
91
00:03:11,053 --> 00:03:13,555
Soul mates.
92
00:03:13,556 --> 00:03:15,390
I'm twisted up inside
93
00:03:15,391 --> 00:03:19,461
but nonetheless I feel the need to say
94
00:03:19,462 --> 00:03:21,396
The Goldbergs - 02x11
The Darryl Dawnkins Dance
95
00:03:21,397 --> 00:03:23,064
I don't know the future
96
00:03:23,065 --> 00:03:27,435
but the past keeps getting
clearer every day
97
00:03:27,436 --> 00:03:32,107
It was Saturday morning, 1980-something,
and that meant one thing... cartoons.
98
00:03:32,108 --> 00:03:35,343
Children across America would park
themselves on the couch [Grunts]
99
00:03:35,344 --> 00:03:38,480
And be sucked into endless
hours of their favorite shows.
100
00:03:38,481 --> 00:03:41,316
There was "G.I. Joe," "Dinosaucers,"
101
00:03:41,317 --> 00:03:42,817
"The Real Ghostbusters,"
102
00:03:42,818 --> 00:03:46,087
and the greatest one of all...
"Transformers."
103
00:03:46,088 --> 00:03:50,158
So, they're robots...
But they're also cars?
104
00:03:50,159 --> 00:03:52,694
And trucks and planes
and sometimes dinosaurs.
105
00:03:52,695 --> 00:03:54,963
Why would you ruin a perfectly good Fiero
106
00:03:54,964 --> 00:03:56,965
by turning it into some dumb robot?
107
00:03:56,966 --> 00:03:59,133
Dumb?! It's the world's greatest cartoon.
108
00:03:59,134 --> 00:04:01,336
They just came out with an animated movie.
109
00:04:01,337 --> 00:04:04,072
They took this and made
it longer? I don't get it.
110
00:04:04,073 --> 00:04:07,075
Oh, but a grown man
hitting a ball with a stick...
111
00:04:07,076 --> 00:04:08,209
That makes sense?
112
00:04:08,210 --> 00:04:10,244
Don't you come after baseball.
113
00:04:10,245 --> 00:04:11,713
It's America's pastime.
114
00:04:11,714 --> 00:04:13,414
And robots are America's future!
115
00:04:13,415 --> 00:04:14,549
Deal with it!
116
00:04:14,550 --> 00:04:16,451
Deal with what? Robots aren't even real.
117
00:04:16,452 --> 00:04:19,754
Oh, you'll see how real they are
when cyborgs take over
118
00:04:19,755 --> 00:04:21,989
and outlaw your precious baseball.
119
00:04:21,990 --> 00:04:23,591
Never. And you know why?
120
00:04:23,592 --> 00:04:25,793
Because we will rise up with our bats
121
00:04:25,794 --> 00:04:28,125
and destroy those metal bastards.
122
00:04:28,127 --> 00:04:30,465
A bat against a plasma cannon?
123
00:04:30,466 --> 00:04:33,301
Good luck mining steel
for your robot overlords.
124
00:04:33,302 --> 00:04:35,570
Okay, this has gotten away from us.
125
00:04:35,571 --> 00:04:37,805
I'll take him to the talking-car movie.
126
00:04:37,806 --> 00:04:39,407
You do what you do.
127
00:04:39,408 --> 00:04:40,808
[Groans]
128
00:04:40,809 --> 00:04:42,543
Pops could care less
about my silly cartoon,
129
00:04:42,544 --> 00:04:44,045
but my best friend
130
00:04:44,046 --> 00:04:45,646
would pretend to love anything for me.
131
00:04:45,647 --> 00:04:49,550
This... is amazing.
132
00:04:49,551 --> 00:04:50,851
What's happening?
133
00:04:50,852 --> 00:04:52,253
That's the autobots.
134
00:04:52,254 --> 00:04:55,323
Those robots are the good guys.
135
00:04:55,324 --> 00:04:58,326
Oh! Watch this. They're about
to kick decepticon butt.
136
00:04:58,327 --> 00:04:59,660
But they didn't.
137
00:04:59,661 --> 00:05:02,096
Instead, they did this...
138
00:05:02,097 --> 00:05:04,365
They killed one of the good guys.
139
00:05:04,366 --> 00:05:05,199
No.
140
00:05:07,202 --> 00:05:09,503
Actually, they killed all the good guys.
141
00:05:09,504 --> 00:05:10,871
No!
142
00:05:10,872 --> 00:05:15,509
Even Optimus Prime
was killed in cold blood...
143
00:05:15,510 --> 00:05:17,778
And along with it, my innocence.
144
00:05:17,779 --> 00:05:21,115
Do the good guys always die like this?
145
00:05:21,116 --> 00:05:22,383
They're not dead.
146
00:05:22,384 --> 00:05:24,485
I-it's probably a plot twist.
147
00:05:24,486 --> 00:05:27,021
They'll come back and save the day.
148
00:05:27,022 --> 00:05:29,323
But they didn't.
149
00:05:29,324 --> 00:05:30,558
You ready to go?
150
00:05:30,559 --> 00:05:31,559
No.
151
00:05:31,560 --> 00:05:33,679
Optimus will be back.
152
00:05:34,896 --> 00:05:36,697
I don't think he's coming back.
153
00:05:36,698 --> 00:05:38,999
Oh, he's coming back...
154
00:05:39,000 --> 00:05:42,770
Bigger and better and not dead.
155
00:05:42,771 --> 00:05:44,972
He's dead, dude.
156
00:05:44,973 --> 00:05:48,609
While I was feeling down,Barry was trying to get down.
157
00:05:48,610 --> 00:05:49,677
'Sup, hot lips?
158
00:05:49,678 --> 00:05:50,978
You know the rules.
159
00:05:50,979 --> 00:05:53,280
We only talk through the locker.
160
00:05:53,281 --> 00:05:54,949
'Sup, hot lips?
161
00:05:54,950 --> 00:05:56,183
What do you want? People are looking.
162
00:05:56,184 --> 00:05:58,686
I was wondering when exactly
you were gonna ask me to the dance.
163
00:05:58,687 --> 00:06:00,521
Yeah, never. 'Cause then
people would see us together.
164
00:06:00,522 --> 00:06:03,457
You know, it kind of sounds like you
don't want to be seen with me in public.
165
00:06:03,458 --> 00:06:05,326
It sounds like that 'cause
that's exactly what I'm saying.
166
00:06:05,327 --> 00:06:06,126
[Sighs]
167
00:06:06,127 --> 00:06:07,428
Aw, come on.
168
00:06:07,429 --> 00:06:09,163
Don't give me those puppy-dog
eyes through the locker.
169
00:06:09,164 --> 00:06:11,665
You know I can't say no
to those baby browns.
170
00:06:11,666 --> 00:06:12,933
Okay, fine!
171
00:06:12,934 --> 00:06:14,902
Just go stag,
and I'll dance adjacent to you
172
00:06:14,903 --> 00:06:16,370
without acknowledging your presence.
173
00:06:16,371 --> 00:06:19,973
But... I was gonna bring my cardboard
so I can break-dance for you, baby.
174
00:06:19,974 --> 00:06:21,542
I'm sorry.
175
00:06:21,543 --> 00:06:22,710
Now go away.
176
00:06:24,946 --> 00:06:27,648
Erica saw that longing look
in Lainey's eye
177
00:06:27,649 --> 00:06:29,917
and knew there was only one thing to do...
178
00:06:29,918 --> 00:06:31,318
Stop it.
179
00:06:31,319 --> 00:06:33,253
Mom, I need you to get
heavily involved with your son
180
00:06:33,254 --> 00:06:35,556
- in an inappropriate way.
- I'm in. You name it, I'll do it.
181
00:06:35,557 --> 00:06:36,557
It's Barry.
182
00:06:36,558 --> 00:06:37,991
He's in a serious funk
183
00:06:37,992 --> 00:06:39,860
because nobody's asked him
to the Sadie Hawkins dance.
184
00:06:39,861 --> 00:06:42,763
Well, when you're that delicious,
it can be intimidating.
185
00:06:42,764 --> 00:06:44,097
That's a theory.
186
00:06:44,098 --> 00:06:45,599
Anyway, I think that he's ready
187
00:06:45,600 --> 00:06:47,734
to meet that soul mate
you had picked out for him.
188
00:06:47,735 --> 00:06:50,204
Oh, my God! It's finally happening!
189
00:06:50,205 --> 00:06:53,640
My children are coming to me
to help them find love!
190
00:06:53,641 --> 00:06:54,828
[Laughs]
191
00:06:54,830 --> 00:06:56,944
I have literally found him
192
00:06:56,945 --> 00:06:59,246
the most perfect, beautiful girl
in the world.
193
00:06:59,247 --> 00:07:00,981
- Great.
- Now, when you're looking...
194
00:07:00,982 --> 00:07:03,417
- No, let's just do this already.
- Are you sure about this?
195
00:07:03,418 --> 00:07:06,720
I mean, Barry did specifically say
he didn't want me to set him up.
196
00:07:06,721 --> 00:07:08,055
You have to.
197
00:07:08,056 --> 00:07:10,424
This is not me being selfish
or having my own agenda.
198
00:07:10,425 --> 00:07:13,827
It's coming from a place of love,
because I just want Barry to be happy.
199
00:07:14,996 --> 00:07:16,630
[Bleep] Me sideways.
200
00:07:16,631 --> 00:07:19,700
I have raised some thoughtful children.
201
00:07:19,701 --> 00:07:20,667
Come here.
202
00:07:23,371 --> 00:07:25,172
Stand up straight.
203
00:07:25,173 --> 00:07:26,339
There it is.
204
00:07:26,340 --> 00:07:28,675
I mean, who murders Optimus Prime?
205
00:07:28,676 --> 00:07:32,112
That's like killing Superman
or Knight Rider or Lassie.
206
00:07:32,113 --> 00:07:35,382
You've been ranting about this
for two days, kiddo.
207
00:07:35,383 --> 00:07:37,751
Come on. He's just a cartoon robot.
208
00:07:37,752 --> 00:07:39,486
To you. To me, he's a hero.
209
00:07:39,487 --> 00:07:42,322
If I made that movie,
Optimus would live forever,
210
00:07:42,323 --> 00:07:44,624
and he would bring peace to Cybertron!
211
00:07:44,625 --> 00:07:46,660
I don't know what you're talking about,
212
00:07:46,661 --> 00:07:48,495
but sure... let's make that movie.
213
00:07:48,496 --> 00:07:51,765
We'll right the wrongs
of those Hollywood bastards.
214
00:07:51,766 --> 00:07:54,067
Well, if we do this, we do it right.
215
00:07:54,068 --> 00:07:57,037
I'm talking top-of-the-line
costumes, set design,
216
00:07:57,038 --> 00:07:59,005
romance, big-budget stuntwork.
217
00:07:59,006 --> 00:08:01,107
I got $75 in my wallet.
218
00:08:01,108 --> 00:08:02,208
Done.
219
00:08:07,214 --> 00:08:09,916
What the hell are you doing?
That's my chair!
220
00:08:09,917 --> 00:08:11,718
Now it's Optimus Prime's command center.
221
00:08:11,719 --> 00:08:13,119
I'm making an awesome movie.
222
00:08:13,120 --> 00:08:14,287
For how long?
223
00:08:14,288 --> 00:08:15,989
We're thinking five, six months.
224
00:08:15,990 --> 00:08:16,956
What?!
225
00:08:16,957 --> 00:08:18,525
I know... it's gonna be tough
226
00:08:18,526 --> 00:08:20,860
with the late-night shooting,
the crew taking over the house,
227
00:08:20,861 --> 00:08:23,296
and the huge water bill.
I got to flood the basement.
228
00:08:23,297 --> 00:08:25,331
Oh, yeah? Well, use somebody else's chair.
229
00:08:25,332 --> 00:08:26,666
Stop!
230
00:08:26,667 --> 00:08:28,034
You don't understand.
231
00:08:28,035 --> 00:08:30,336
Optimus was murdered in cold blood.
232
00:08:30,337 --> 00:08:33,239
The Greek exchange student
staying with the Applebaums?!
233
00:08:33,240 --> 00:08:34,874
No. That kid's name is Niko.
234
00:08:34,875 --> 00:08:37,610
I'm talking about the robot
I like from the cartoon.
235
00:08:37,611 --> 00:08:38,611
So?
236
00:08:38,612 --> 00:08:40,146
So he's gone,
237
00:08:40,147 --> 00:08:42,248
and if it can happen to him,
it can happen to anyone.
238
00:08:42,249 --> 00:08:44,217
Oh. I see what's happening.
239
00:08:44,218 --> 00:08:46,185
We need to have the death talk.
240
00:08:46,186 --> 00:08:48,154
Eh... I-I'm fine. We don't need to talk.
241
00:08:48,155 --> 00:08:50,557
I just think death sucks
and it shouldn't happen,
242
00:08:50,558 --> 00:08:52,258
and I'm gonna undo it.
243
00:08:52,259 --> 00:08:54,661
Yeah, I know it's scary,
but we all got to go sometime.
244
00:08:54,662 --> 00:08:56,429
You got nothing to worry about.
245
00:08:56,430 --> 00:08:58,431
You got your whole life ahead of you.
246
00:08:58,432 --> 00:08:59,265
Really?
247
00:08:59,266 --> 00:09:00,466
Yeah.
248
00:09:00,467 --> 00:09:03,569
Now, if you were an old man,
different story.
249
00:09:04,523 --> 00:09:06,439
All right. Good talk.
250
00:09:06,440 --> 00:09:08,007
But it wasn't a good talk.
251
00:09:08,008 --> 00:09:10,743
Now I was worrying
about my other hero... pops.
252
00:09:10,744 --> 00:09:14,147
Okay, time for my big battle scene.
253
00:09:14,148 --> 00:09:17,683
Optimo gets run over and lives.
254
00:09:17,684 --> 00:09:21,454
Aaaaaaand... hit me with the car.
255
00:09:21,455 --> 00:09:23,723
A-about that... there were some rewrites.
256
00:09:23,724 --> 00:09:27,093
In the new scene, Optimus Prime
eats a fiber-rich breakfast
257
00:09:27,094 --> 00:09:29,095
and goes for a heart-smart walk.
258
00:09:29,096 --> 00:09:31,664
Okay, I'm not understanding
my character here.
259
00:09:31,665 --> 00:09:33,566
You told me I was a badass.
260
00:09:33,567 --> 00:09:34,567
You are.
261
00:09:34,568 --> 00:09:35,902
And after this scene,
262
00:09:35,903 --> 00:09:38,304
you're gonna rest up with
some hot tea under an Afghan,
263
00:09:38,305 --> 00:09:39,639
like a badass.
264
00:09:39,640 --> 00:09:42,108
Feels like you're taking
the teeth out of this thing.
265
00:09:42,109 --> 00:09:44,210
Well, I'm the director,
and this is my vision.
266
00:09:44,211 --> 00:09:47,480
Now, take a calcium supplement
and stand on your mark in the shade.
267
00:09:47,481 --> 00:09:48,414
Oh, stop.
268
00:09:48,415 --> 00:09:50,449
Just tap me. Tap me with the car.
269
00:09:50,450 --> 00:09:52,485
You're old. It would shatter
your whole body.
270
00:09:52,486 --> 00:09:53,953
I'll show you old.
271
00:09:53,954 --> 00:09:56,122
- Hit me with the car.
- No!
272
00:09:56,123 --> 00:09:59,458
You get in that car
and you run me over right now.
273
00:09:59,459 --> 00:10:02,495
Forget it! You're too difficult
to work with! You're fired!
274
00:10:02,496 --> 00:10:05,097
You can't fire me! I'm the star!
275
00:10:05,098 --> 00:10:06,398
I fire you!
276
00:10:06,399 --> 00:10:09,268
You can't fire me!
I brought you onto this project!
277
00:10:09,269 --> 00:10:12,805
Well, I'm pulling the funding,
'cause I'm very upset...
278
00:10:12,806 --> 00:10:16,475
Even though I'm not quite clear
what we're arguing about.
279
00:10:18,245 --> 00:10:21,113
And I'm walking like this
because of the costume,
280
00:10:21,114 --> 00:10:22,581
not because I'm old.
281
00:10:23,819 --> 00:10:26,619
Barry still might not have had a date
for the Darryl Dawkins dance,
282
00:10:26,621 --> 00:10:29,958
but thanks to Erica's scheme,
he was about to get one.
283
00:10:29,960 --> 00:10:33,525
Love bug, I just got off the phone.
284
00:10:33,527 --> 00:10:35,528
What's the best news you could think of?
285
00:10:35,529 --> 00:10:37,563
I'm gonna be on a wheaties
box with Pete Rose.
286
00:10:37,564 --> 00:10:38,531
Close.
287
00:10:38,532 --> 00:10:39,832
I found a wonderful girl,
288
00:10:39,833 --> 00:10:42,468
and she wants to ask you
to the Sadie Hawkins dance.
289
00:10:42,469 --> 00:10:44,537
I honestly have no idea
what you're talking about.
290
00:10:44,538 --> 00:10:45,738
She means "Darryl Dawkins."
291
00:10:45,739 --> 00:10:47,473
Ohhhh!
292
00:10:47,474 --> 00:10:49,679
Yeah, forget it. I hate that stupid dance.
293
00:10:49,710 --> 00:10:51,477
Barry, you should listen to her.
294
00:10:51,478 --> 00:10:53,780
Mom's the best matchmaker in town, okay?
295
00:10:53,781 --> 00:10:55,815
She set me up with a ton of great people.
296
00:10:55,816 --> 00:10:56,582
Really? Who?
297
00:10:56,583 --> 00:10:57,750
You know, like, uh...
298
00:10:57,751 --> 00:10:59,185
[Muffled] Mondragor McCalister.
299
00:10:59,186 --> 00:11:01,287
Mondragor McCalister? Who's that?
300
00:11:01,288 --> 00:11:02,722
Well... he's...
301
00:11:02,723 --> 00:11:04,524
[Mumbling]
302
00:11:04,525 --> 00:11:06,158
Stop talking into your soda can!
303
00:11:06,159 --> 00:11:08,628
- [Mumbling]
- Barry, trust your mother.
304
00:11:08,629 --> 00:11:10,529
I found the girl of your dreams.
305
00:11:10,530 --> 00:11:12,164
She's smart, she's pretty,
306
00:11:12,165 --> 00:11:14,100
and she's waiting in the kitchen.
307
00:11:14,101 --> 00:11:15,501
What is she doing?!
308
00:11:15,502 --> 00:11:17,670
I already met
the girl of my dreams... Lainey.
309
00:11:17,671 --> 00:11:19,605
She said she might dance adjacent to me.
310
00:11:19,606 --> 00:11:22,441
Dude, if you knew what "adjacent" meant,
you would not be okay with that.
311
00:11:22,442 --> 00:11:23,943
[Singsong voice] Here she is.
312
00:11:23,944 --> 00:11:26,779
This is Evelyn Silver.
313
00:11:26,780 --> 00:11:29,248
I know her mother
from my scrapbooking circle.
314
00:11:29,249 --> 00:11:31,584
I scrapbook, too, but I'm
nothing compared to Bevy.
315
00:11:31,585 --> 00:11:34,854
She's the one who bought me
my first pair of scalloping scissors.
316
00:11:34,855 --> 00:11:36,922
Your mom is my arts-and-crafts guru.
317
00:11:36,923 --> 00:11:38,958
I mean, I would have never thought
318
00:11:38,959 --> 00:11:40,926
to cut my pictures into fun shapes,
319
00:11:40,927 --> 00:11:42,194
like hearts and stars.
320
00:11:42,195 --> 00:11:44,430
Squares are for squares.
321
00:11:44,431 --> 00:11:47,266
[Laughs] Even weirder than
Barry dating Erica's best friend
322
00:11:47,267 --> 00:11:49,535
was Barry dating our mother.
323
00:11:49,536 --> 00:11:50,636
Wait, wait. I know you.
324
00:11:50,637 --> 00:11:53,305
You're the girl at school who always
argues with the teachers.
325
00:11:53,306 --> 00:11:55,274
- Only when they're wrong.
- Which is a lot.
326
00:11:55,275 --> 00:11:57,234
- Oh!
- Oh, dear God.
327
00:11:57,236 --> 00:11:59,345
I like your sweater.
I find it oddly comforting.
328
00:11:59,346 --> 00:12:00,512
Thank you.
329
00:12:00,513 --> 00:12:03,515
You got some schmutz on the side of...
330
00:12:03,516 --> 00:12:05,150
This is so, so creepy.
331
00:12:05,151 --> 00:12:07,019
Listen, your mom was thinking
332
00:12:07,020 --> 00:12:09,388
maybe we could go to the dance together.
333
00:12:09,389 --> 00:12:11,757
- Oh, I don't know what...
- So you already have a date?
334
00:12:13,126 --> 00:12:14,093
Not really.
335
00:12:14,094 --> 00:12:15,260
Well, you do now.
336
00:12:15,261 --> 00:12:18,230
I'm wearing pink, so keep that in mind
when you're buying my corsage.
337
00:12:18,231 --> 00:12:20,065
No carnations. Don't cheap out.
338
00:12:20,066 --> 00:12:22,768
Bevy! Where are my comfortable loafers?
339
00:12:22,769 --> 00:12:24,169
Did you check by the front door?
340
00:12:24,170 --> 00:12:25,170
Who are you?
341
00:12:25,171 --> 00:12:27,272
I'm Evy. You just called for me.
342
00:12:27,273 --> 00:12:28,674
No, I said "Bevy."
343
00:12:28,675 --> 00:12:29,842
They're by the front door.
344
00:12:29,843 --> 00:12:31,677
Well. Sorry.
345
00:12:31,678 --> 00:12:33,746
And thank you.
346
00:12:33,747 --> 00:12:35,381
Is that your hubby?
347
00:12:35,382 --> 00:12:36,215
Yeah.
348
00:12:36,216 --> 00:12:37,483
What a catch.
349
00:12:37,484 --> 00:12:38,584
[Laughs]
350
00:12:38,585 --> 00:12:40,252
Oh, dear God.
351
00:12:45,024 --> 00:12:46,091
What are you doing?
352
00:12:46,092 --> 00:12:48,227
Signing up for skydiving lessons.
353
00:12:48,228 --> 00:12:49,761
I'll show him who's old.
354
00:12:50,563 --> 00:12:51,597
Okay.
355
00:12:51,598 --> 00:12:53,765
I just got into a fight with Adam.
356
00:12:53,766 --> 00:12:56,535
You just got into a fight
with Adam? Over what?
357
00:12:56,536 --> 00:12:58,337
He wouldn't run me over with the car!
358
00:12:59,672 --> 00:13:00,639
Okay.
359
00:13:00,640 --> 00:13:02,174
I mean, all of a sudden,
360
00:13:02,175 --> 00:13:04,776
he's treating me
like some fragile old fogey.
361
00:13:04,776 --> 00:13:08,346
This might partially be my fault.
362
00:13:08,348 --> 00:13:09,848
I may have said something
363
00:13:09,849 --> 00:13:11,817
along the lines of "old people die,"
364
00:13:11,818 --> 00:13:13,885
and he may have jumped to conclusions.
365
00:13:13,886 --> 00:13:15,220
What conclusions?
366
00:13:15,221 --> 00:13:18,323
You know, if you're
at the deli counter of life
367
00:13:18,324 --> 00:13:20,025
and you've got your ticket,
368
00:13:20,026 --> 00:13:22,794
you're gonna get your sandwich
sooner than other people will.
369
00:13:22,795 --> 00:13:25,364
What is this horrible deli?
I hate this deli.
370
00:13:25,365 --> 00:13:26,965
We all got to eat there sometime.
371
00:13:26,966 --> 00:13:29,601
- Well, I'm just gonna have a pickle.
- Can't just have a pickle.
372
00:13:29,602 --> 00:13:31,570
I can, and I will.
373
00:13:31,571 --> 00:13:35,040
- You can't just have a pickle.
- I'm in better shape than you.
374
00:13:35,041 --> 00:13:36,608
Check out these guns!
375
00:13:36,609 --> 00:13:39,077
- Why are you yelling at me?
- 'Cause it's your fault!
376
00:13:39,078 --> 00:13:42,681
You're the old guy wearing the
costume of the dead robot he loves.
377
00:13:42,682 --> 00:13:43,882
You're right.
378
00:13:43,883 --> 00:13:45,550
The poor kid.
379
00:13:45,551 --> 00:13:49,121
He's probably scared of losing
his two greatest heroes.
380
00:13:49,122 --> 00:13:52,390
I'm sure there's a couple
of other heroes on that list...
381
00:13:52,391 --> 00:13:54,226
Like me, for example.
382
00:13:55,428 --> 00:13:57,395
Okay.
383
00:13:57,396 --> 00:14:00,131
Evelyn Silver?
384
00:14:00,132 --> 00:14:02,400
How could you go to the dance
with Evelyn Silver?
385
00:14:02,401 --> 00:14:03,802
'Cause she asked me!
386
00:14:03,803 --> 00:14:05,770
Well, she kind of told me.
387
00:14:05,771 --> 00:14:08,173
She's pushy in a way
that feels familiar and safe.
388
00:14:08,174 --> 00:14:10,375
Well, now we're never
not going to the dance together.
389
00:14:10,376 --> 00:14:13,044
But... we never were
going to the dance together.
390
00:14:13,045 --> 00:14:16,181
But now we're really never
not going to the dance together.
391
00:14:16,182 --> 00:14:18,316
Okay, I am totally lost here.
392
00:14:18,317 --> 00:14:20,252
I used to not want
to be seen with you in public,
393
00:14:20,253 --> 00:14:22,520
but now I don't want to be seen
with you in private, either.
394
00:14:22,521 --> 00:14:24,556
But if we were in private,
how could anyone see us?
395
00:14:24,557 --> 00:14:27,058
They wouldn't not see us,
but now they'll never not see us!
396
00:14:27,059 --> 00:14:28,927
I think my brain is about to explode!
397
00:14:28,928 --> 00:14:31,429
See if you understand this...
I'm dumping you.
398
00:14:31,430 --> 00:14:33,264
We were together?
399
00:14:34,600 --> 00:14:36,201
We were together!
400
00:14:36,202 --> 00:14:38,870
Wait! Come back!
401
00:14:38,871 --> 00:14:40,905
We were together.
402
00:14:44,459 --> 00:14:47,194
Pops gave me some time
to cool down from our big blowup.
403
00:14:47,196 --> 00:14:49,863
Unfortunately, I was hotter than ever.
404
00:14:49,864 --> 00:14:50,997
Hey, kiddo.
405
00:14:50,998 --> 00:14:52,165
[Knocks on door]
406
00:14:52,166 --> 00:14:53,200
Can we talk?
407
00:14:53,201 --> 00:14:55,402
Busy. I'm making a new movie.
408
00:14:55,403 --> 00:14:58,992
Stop-motion animation...
You know what's good about that?
409
00:14:59,007 --> 00:15:01,074
No actors.
410
00:15:01,075 --> 00:15:03,777
Well, you look like crap. Have you slept?
411
00:15:03,778 --> 00:15:06,847
No, I haven't slept.
I'm making a masterpiece here.
412
00:15:06,848 --> 00:15:09,414
Okay, look.
413
00:15:14,388 --> 00:15:18,258
I know your dad talked to you
about the deli of life,
414
00:15:18,259 --> 00:15:19,759
but you need to know...
415
00:15:19,760 --> 00:15:22,495
I'm not eating a sandwich just yet.
416
00:15:22,496 --> 00:15:24,664
Maybe it's because I'm super-tired,
417
00:15:24,665 --> 00:15:26,399
but you're making no sense.
418
00:15:26,400 --> 00:15:30,003
Look, everyone has their time.
419
00:15:30,004 --> 00:15:32,439
But I'm here, I'm awesome,
420
00:15:32,440 --> 00:15:36,009
and I'm not going anywhere
anytime soon, kiddo.
421
00:15:36,773 --> 00:15:38,411
- Really?
- Really.
422
00:15:39,271 --> 00:15:41,739
Want to know my secret?
423
00:15:42,216 --> 00:15:46,039
Hanging out with my best friend
keeps me young.
424
00:15:46,721 --> 00:15:49,422
Now...
425
00:15:49,423 --> 00:15:53,174
What do you say you run
your grandpa over with a car?
426
00:15:53,176 --> 00:15:55,143
I'd love to.
427
00:15:58,132 --> 00:16:00,834
Hey. Aren't you supposed to be
getting ready for the dance?
428
00:16:00,835 --> 00:16:02,001
What's the point?
429
00:16:02,002 --> 00:16:03,970
I found love, and I lost it.
430
00:16:03,971 --> 00:16:07,740
Now I'm never gonna talk through a locker
with someone I really care about again.
431
00:16:07,741 --> 00:16:09,842
Well, Evy seems creepily into you.
432
00:16:09,843 --> 00:16:13,146
But Lainey was cool
and made me feel alive,
433
00:16:13,147 --> 00:16:17,250
and I pretty much had a crush
on her for my entire life.
434
00:16:17,251 --> 00:16:20,320
But, like you said, she doesn't like me.
435
00:16:20,321 --> 00:16:22,622
Look, I know my best friend.
436
00:16:22,623 --> 00:16:23,923
Lainey likes you.
437
00:16:23,924 --> 00:16:27,360
She just treats you like an annoying,
twerpy loser because you let her.
438
00:16:27,361 --> 00:16:28,761
Doesn't matter now.
439
00:16:28,762 --> 00:16:30,196
I ruined everything.
440
00:16:30,197 --> 00:16:31,197
[Sighs]
441
00:16:31,198 --> 00:16:32,432
No, I did.
442
00:16:32,433 --> 00:16:35,234
Mom didn't just randomly
set you up on a date.
443
00:16:35,235 --> 00:16:36,803
I...May have put her up to it
444
00:16:36,804 --> 00:16:39,472
because I didn't want you
frenching on my best friend.
445
00:16:39,473 --> 00:16:42,842
- What?!
- I know it was wrong, but now...
446
00:16:42,843 --> 00:16:45,344
I can't believe I'm saying this...
447
00:16:45,345 --> 00:16:48,114
You should be at the dance with her.
448
00:16:48,115 --> 00:16:49,048
Ew.
449
00:16:51,251 --> 00:16:55,922
Heaven isn't too far away
450
00:16:57,824 --> 00:17:02,228
closer to it every day
451
00:17:02,229 --> 00:17:03,763
Lainey. We need to talk.
452
00:17:03,764 --> 00:17:05,765
Uh... I'm sorry. I don't know you.
453
00:17:05,766 --> 00:17:06,766
Just hear me out!
454
00:17:06,767 --> 00:17:08,401
No! Leave me alone!
455
00:17:08,402 --> 00:17:09,769
Lainey!
456
00:17:09,770 --> 00:17:10,803
Lainey!
457
00:17:10,804 --> 00:17:13,239
How I love the way you move
458
00:17:13,240 --> 00:17:15,307
and the sparkle in your eyes
459
00:17:15,308 --> 00:17:16,776
Lainey, wait!
460
00:17:16,777 --> 00:17:18,744
Wait! Wait.
461
00:17:18,745 --> 00:17:22,715
Okay, I know I'm irritating
and I sweat a lot
462
00:17:22,716 --> 00:17:25,317
and my rap flow is too ahead of its time,
463
00:17:25,318 --> 00:17:28,220
so I get why you don't want
to be seen with me.
464
00:17:28,221 --> 00:17:30,689
But I just need to know one thing...
465
00:17:30,690 --> 00:17:32,758
Do... you... like me?
466
00:17:34,661 --> 00:17:36,228
I do. Please don't tell anyone.
467
00:17:36,229 --> 00:17:37,229
I won't!
468
00:17:37,230 --> 00:17:38,631
But it's come to my attention
469
00:17:38,632 --> 00:17:41,033
you only treat me this way
because I put up with it.
470
00:17:41,034 --> 00:17:43,068
But I'm here to tell you...
471
00:17:43,069 --> 00:17:45,271
I want to put up with it.
472
00:17:45,272 --> 00:17:47,006
Let me stand in the shadows.
473
00:17:47,007 --> 00:17:49,742
Let me only talk to you
through your locker vent.
474
00:17:49,743 --> 00:17:52,778
Let me be your secret shame.
475
00:17:53,947 --> 00:17:55,080
God, you're annoying.
476
00:17:55,081 --> 00:17:56,115
I know.
477
00:17:56,116 --> 00:17:57,716
Come on. Let's dance.
478
00:17:57,717 --> 00:17:59,418
We can still hear the music out here.
479
00:18:01,254 --> 00:18:02,421
No.
480
00:18:02,422 --> 00:18:03,656
Let's go inside.
481
00:18:03,657 --> 00:18:05,257
Then everyone will see us.
482
00:18:05,258 --> 00:18:06,325
That's the point, dummy.
483
00:18:09,896 --> 00:18:17,136
Heaven isn't too far away
484
00:18:17,137 --> 00:18:21,073
closer to it every day
485
00:18:21,074 --> 00:18:23,442
ah, ah
486
00:18:23,443 --> 00:18:28,380
no matter what your friends might say
487
00:18:28,381 --> 00:18:32,518
we'll find our way
488
00:18:32,519 --> 00:18:33,652
yeah
489
00:18:33,653 --> 00:18:36,588
[Guitar solo]
490
00:18:36,590 --> 00:18:38,691
Yep, Barry Goldberg
was on top of the world,
491
00:18:38,691 --> 00:18:40,559
and no one could ruin that...
492
00:18:40,560 --> 00:18:42,494
Not even Beverly Goldberg.
493
00:18:42,495 --> 00:18:44,363
What the hell is this?!
494
00:18:44,364 --> 00:18:46,932
I set Barry up with his soul mate,
and he's not even with her
495
00:18:46,933 --> 00:18:50,269
- when I show up completely unannounced?
- Yeah, about that... why are you here?
496
00:18:50,270 --> 00:18:52,070
I came to see the lovebirds,
497
00:18:52,071 --> 00:18:54,139
but those are the wrong lovebirds!
498
00:18:54,140 --> 00:18:56,608
Yeah... but maybe not.
499
00:18:56,609 --> 00:18:59,244
Now the lights are going out
500
00:18:59,245 --> 00:19:00,579
He does look happy.
501
00:19:00,580 --> 00:19:01,613
He really does.
502
00:19:01,614 --> 00:19:03,982
- Wait. What happened to Evy?
- Oh, I took care of that.
503
00:19:03,983 --> 00:19:05,817
Turns out matchmaking runs in the family.
504
00:19:07,587 --> 00:19:09,688
Damn it. This is my only good tie.
505
00:19:09,689 --> 00:19:13,325
Oh, honey, that's okay.
Don't touch it. Rub it out with club soda.
506
00:19:13,326 --> 00:19:14,626
Be good as new.
507
00:19:14,627 --> 00:19:16,395
I don't know what to do
508
00:19:16,396 --> 00:19:18,463
That's the thing about growing up...
509
00:19:18,464 --> 00:19:21,900
There's those perfect moments
where life just surprises you.
510
00:19:21,901 --> 00:19:23,668
Heaven isn't...
511
00:19:23,669 --> 00:19:26,471
For Barry, that moment was now.
512
00:19:28,674 --> 00:19:30,408
And for me, I felt that moment
513
00:19:30,409 --> 00:19:31,843
every time I was with my grandfather.
514
00:19:31,844 --> 00:19:33,612
[Tires screech]
515
00:19:35,448 --> 00:19:37,816
That's the end of you, Optimus.
516
00:19:40,186 --> 00:19:43,221
I literally cannot die!
517
00:19:43,222 --> 00:19:44,856
He was more than my hero.
518
00:19:44,857 --> 00:19:46,258
He was my best friend.
519
00:19:46,259 --> 00:19:47,826
So, what'd you think, kiddo?
520
00:19:47,827 --> 00:19:50,562
I love it.
521
00:19:55,609 --> 00:19:58,035
_
522
00:19:58,037 --> 00:20:01,673
[Ding]
523
00:20:01,674 --> 00:20:04,209
Adam: Optimus! No!
524
00:20:04,211 --> 00:20:05,281
[Sobs]
525
00:20:05,283 --> 00:20:10,348
We gather here today to witness
the burial of Optimus Prime.
526
00:20:10,349 --> 00:20:11,516
Later that night...
527
00:20:14,053 --> 00:20:15,720
There's no Optimus! He's gone!
528
00:20:15,721 --> 00:20:17,721
_
529
00:20:19,391 --> 00:20:21,059
[Dance music plays]
530
00:20:31,450 --> 00:20:32,517
Take the wave from me.
531
00:20:32,518 --> 00:20:33,985
What? No. I don't want the wave.
532
00:20:33,986 --> 00:20:36,421
- Come on! Take it!
- Stop it! I don't want it!
533
00:20:36,423 --> 00:20:38,210
- No wave.
- What the hell?
534
00:20:38,212 --> 00:20:39,824
I've been waiting in the car 10 minutes.
535
00:20:39,825 --> 00:20:42,359
Just watching Barry.
He's quite the dancer.
536
00:20:42,361 --> 00:20:43,928
Looks like a moron to me.
537
00:20:43,930 --> 00:20:45,397
You can say that again.
538
00:20:45,399 --> 00:20:48,766
Evy, I'm gonna go sit in the
comfortable chairs over there.
539
00:20:48,767 --> 00:20:51,169
Sitting? That sounds good.
540
00:20:54,206 --> 00:20:56,007
Okay, yeah, I see it now.
541
00:20:57,810 --> 00:21:00,344
sync and correction by solfieri
www.addic7ed.com
542
00:21:00,394 --> 00:21:04,944
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
40311
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