Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:00,959 --> 00:00:05,088
Happily divorced is shot
before a live audience.
2
00:00:05,097 --> 00:00:07,732
In the last ten years,
this show has taken me
3
00:00:07,733 --> 00:00:09,567
on some amazing adventures.
4
00:00:09,568 --> 00:00:12,680
But the nyiragongo region of
the Congo is one of the most
5
00:00:12,681 --> 00:00:16,033
dangerous and exhilarating
places I've ever been.
6
00:00:16,034 --> 00:00:17,245
Oh, my God.
7
00:00:17,246 --> 00:00:21,394
2,000 pieces,
this is terrifying.
8
00:00:21,395 --> 00:00:22,865
Ah, look at this.
9
00:00:22,899 --> 00:00:25,768
He just got off the plane,
he hasn't even settled in yet
10
00:00:25,769 --> 00:00:28,947
and already he's
fighting a crocodile.
11
00:00:28,948 --> 00:00:32,182
Oi, he's got a knife.
12
00:00:32,216 --> 00:00:33,453
No matter how much I beg you,
13
00:00:33,454 --> 00:00:37,058
do not let me look at
the picture on this box.
14
00:00:37,059 --> 00:00:40,631
Ooh, I found a corner.
15
00:00:42,033 --> 00:00:44,667
What are you watching?
16
00:00:44,668 --> 00:00:46,770
Life passing me by.
17
00:00:46,804 --> 00:00:48,236
What do you mean?
18
00:00:48,271 --> 00:00:50,005
I mean this.
19
00:00:50,006 --> 00:00:52,407
There's a whole world out
there, and I'm sitting here
20
00:00:52,408 --> 00:00:54,309
on a Saturday night
watching you
21
00:00:54,310 --> 00:00:56,211
making a puzzle
of mount rushmore.
22
00:00:56,212 --> 00:00:58,680
Ahh!
23
00:00:58,681 --> 00:01:01,719
Thanks a lot for ruining it,
big mouth.
24
00:01:01,753 --> 00:01:03,354
What happened to us?
25
00:01:03,355 --> 00:01:07,926
I had such high pes
for our divorce.
26
00:01:07,960 --> 00:01:10,863
I mean, we were gonna
sell our dream house,
27
00:01:10,864 --> 00:01:14,435
travel apart,
find the perfect men.
28
00:01:15,838 --> 00:01:17,840
Ah, company, thank God.
29
00:01:17,841 --> 00:01:20,977
Wa-wa... hey, don't answer
the door at 9:30 at night.
30
00:01:20,978 --> 00:01:21,979
You don't know who's out there.
31
00:01:21,980 --> 00:01:24,615
They could kill us.
32
00:01:24,649 --> 00:01:28,587
Not if we bore them
to death first.
33
00:01:28,588 --> 00:01:30,989
Oh, thank God, Judy.
34
00:01:30,990 --> 00:01:32,458
Listen, franny, I can't stay.
35
00:01:32,459 --> 00:01:34,794
Why?
36
00:01:34,795 --> 00:01:35,795
Do you have any white roses?
37
00:01:35,796 --> 00:01:37,030
I'm going to a party,
38
00:01:37,031 --> 00:01:38,598
and everybody's gotta bring
something white.
39
00:01:38,599 --> 00:01:43,604
Bring me! Bring me!
40
00:01:43,605 --> 00:01:46,806
I thought tonight
was puzzle night.
41
00:01:46,841 --> 00:01:48,808
It's not just puzzle night.
42
00:01:48,809 --> 00:01:51,944
We're also making
lemon squares.
43
00:01:51,979 --> 00:01:54,446
I'm busting
out of this joint.
44
00:01:54,481 --> 00:01:55,481
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
45
00:01:55,482 --> 00:01:56,449
Whose party is this?
46
00:01:56,483 --> 00:01:57,550
A friend.
47
00:01:57,551 --> 00:01:59,820
Well, a friend of a friend.
48
00:01:59,821 --> 00:02:01,255
It's a new age singles party
49
00:02:01,256 --> 00:02:02,390
with everybody teaching you
50
00:02:02,391 --> 00:02:04,326
a bunch of rituals
from around the world.
51
00:02:04,360 --> 00:02:06,595
I love a ritual party.
52
00:02:06,596 --> 00:02:08,364
Since when?
53
00:02:08,399 --> 00:02:12,002
Since I hate this.
54
00:02:12,036 --> 00:02:14,271
Well I think the whole ritual
thing is a load of crap.
55
00:02:14,272 --> 00:02:17,809
But, they're gonna have
an in-n-out burger truck.
56
00:02:17,810 --> 00:02:19,343
Just give me five minutes.
57
00:02:19,344 --> 00:02:21,212
Oh, wait... hold on,
hold on, hold on.
58
00:02:21,246 --> 00:02:22,646
You're going to some
friend of a friend
59
00:02:22,647 --> 00:02:24,482
of a friend's house in
the middle of the night?
60
00:02:24,516 --> 00:02:27,651
Yes, Peter, that is
the difference between us.
61
00:02:27,652 --> 00:02:30,153
I am not afraid to take risks.
62
00:02:30,154 --> 00:02:32,856
Excuse me, when have I ever
been afraid to take risks?
63
00:02:32,890 --> 00:02:34,891
Like, our whole lives.
64
00:02:34,892 --> 00:02:36,759
"Maybe we shouldn't go
rock climbing."
65
00:02:36,760 --> 00:02:38,362
Maybe we shouldn't eat Sushi.
66
00:02:38,363 --> 00:02:39,763
Maybe we should get
to know each other
67
00:02:39,764 --> 00:02:44,302
"better before we get married."
68
00:02:44,303 --> 00:02:47,375
All right,
that one had merit.
69
00:02:52,246 --> 00:02:56,449
She was certain that he was
the one and only
70
00:02:56,450 --> 00:03:02,189
but their union always seemed
a little forced
71
00:03:02,190 --> 00:03:05,792
she got married anyway
72
00:03:05,793 --> 00:03:07,660
turns out that he was gay
73
00:03:07,661 --> 00:03:11,664
they're still in love but now
she's happily divorced
74
00:03:11,665 --> 00:03:13,651
Sync & corrections by Rafael UPD
www.addic7ed.com/
75
00:03:16,069 --> 00:03:20,073
so this is what happens
after the 10:00 news.
76
00:03:21,943 --> 00:03:24,077
Who's the guy that invited
you to the party?
77
00:03:24,112 --> 00:03:25,746
Who said I was invited?
78
00:03:27,082 --> 00:03:28,816
Be cool
79
00:03:28,850 --> 00:03:31,052
we are such bad girls.
80
00:03:31,053 --> 00:03:33,221
We're crashing a party?
81
00:03:33,222 --> 00:03:36,424
Do you understand
what "cool" means?
82
00:03:37,893 --> 00:03:39,194
Ooh, the in-n-out burger
truck's here.
83
00:03:39,195 --> 00:03:41,630
Hurry!
84
00:03:41,664 --> 00:03:45,001
Please, everyone, gather round
these large bowls of pudding.
85
00:03:45,035 --> 00:03:46,335
Ooh, dessert first.
86
00:03:46,336 --> 00:03:48,872
There's a ritual I like.
87
00:03:48,906 --> 00:03:51,141
The first ritual
is from Norway.
88
00:03:51,142 --> 00:03:55,413
One for
the men and one for the women.
89
00:03:55,414 --> 00:03:58,583
There is something very
special in the pudding.
90
00:03:58,584 --> 00:04:02,921
Boy, I hope she
didn't see the help.
91
00:04:02,955 --> 00:04:05,857
There is a single almond
in each of the bowls.
92
00:04:05,892 --> 00:04:08,660
The two people that
find the almonds
93
00:04:08,695 --> 00:04:12,264
are destined to be soul mates.
94
00:04:12,265 --> 00:04:13,865
- Ugh.
- Come on, Fran.
95
00:04:13,866 --> 00:04:15,900
You said you wanted
to try something new.
96
00:04:15,901 --> 00:04:19,337
I know I did but this is just
the stupidest thing...
97
00:04:19,338 --> 00:04:20,704
Hey, look at that!
98
00:04:20,705 --> 00:04:22,373
I got it.
99
00:04:22,374 --> 00:04:25,376
All right, Judy,
you had enough pudding.
100
00:04:29,515 --> 00:04:31,182
I got it too.
101
00:04:31,183 --> 00:04:33,250
I got it too.
102
00:04:35,487 --> 00:04:37,887
The next ritual
is from Amsterdam.
103
00:04:37,888 --> 00:04:39,956
We will pass around the pipe.
104
00:04:39,991 --> 00:04:44,696
I'm in!
105
00:04:44,730 --> 00:04:46,598
Hi.
106
00:04:46,599 --> 00:04:49,201
- I'm Adam.
- Hi, I'm Fran.
107
00:04:49,202 --> 00:04:52,338
Wow, we both got the almond.
108
00:04:52,372 --> 00:04:53,372
You know what's so funny?
109
00:04:53,373 --> 00:04:54,374
I don't even like nuts.
110
00:05:01,114 --> 00:05:05,116
You have no idea
what a plus that is.
111
00:05:08,454 --> 00:05:10,655
I've got to be
honest with you.
112
00:05:10,656 --> 00:05:12,223
I was standing right there,
I was checking you out,
113
00:05:12,224 --> 00:05:14,492
hoping that you would
get that almond,
114
00:05:14,493 --> 00:05:15,993
and then when I saw you
shove your friend aside
115
00:05:15,994 --> 00:05:18,462
and dive for it, I knew you
were my kind of woman.
116
00:05:20,632 --> 00:05:22,867
- You caught that, huh?
- Mm-hmm.
117
00:05:22,868 --> 00:05:26,003
Well, when I see something
that I like, I go for it.
118
00:05:26,038 --> 00:05:27,839
- Oh.
- What do you do, Adam?
119
00:05:27,873 --> 00:05:28,940
Commercial fisherman.
120
00:05:28,974 --> 00:05:30,942
Yup, have my own boat.
121
00:05:30,943 --> 00:05:32,877
Tuna mostly, down in San Diego.
122
00:05:32,878 --> 00:05:35,312
Wow, you know I watch
deadliest catch.
123
00:05:35,313 --> 00:05:37,849
That's dangerous.
124
00:05:37,883 --> 00:05:39,350
Is that how you hurt your arm?
125
00:05:39,351 --> 00:05:42,687
Oh, yeah, I just, uh... pulling
up a hammerhead shark.
126
00:05:42,688 --> 00:05:44,356
Mmm, I hear ya.
127
00:05:44,357 --> 00:05:45,558
Look at this.
128
00:05:45,559 --> 00:05:48,761
Curling iron meugas.
129
00:05:48,762 --> 00:05:50,964
Yeah, this stuff kinda goes
with the territory.
130
00:05:50,965 --> 00:05:52,732
It's why it's so hard
to find a crew.
131
00:05:52,733 --> 00:05:54,335
Plus you're out in
the middle of the ocean
132
00:05:54,336 --> 00:05:56,070
for months at a time
on a tiny little boat,
133
00:05:56,071 --> 00:05:59,406
surrounded by nothing but men.
134
00:05:59,407 --> 00:06:03,911
You know, my ex is
looking for more work.
135
00:06:03,912 --> 00:06:05,380
Sorry, you're gonna
be on my crew
136
00:06:05,381 --> 00:06:06,948
you have to be really smart.
137
00:06:06,949 --> 00:06:09,083
Oh, well, how do you know
he's not smart?
138
00:06:09,084 --> 00:06:10,585
He let you get away,
didn't he?
139
00:06:12,154 --> 00:06:15,156
Good-night, Judy.
140
00:06:26,651 --> 00:06:28,452
Okay, Mr. Peter.
141
00:06:28,453 --> 00:06:31,455
I finished taking
the dog for a push.
142
00:06:35,760 --> 00:06:37,961
You know, Fran's the one
who wanted this dog
143
00:06:37,962 --> 00:06:39,997
and I'm stuck
taking care of it.
144
00:06:40,031 --> 00:06:43,800
Yeah, that must
suck for you.
145
00:06:43,801 --> 00:06:45,280
Where is Ms. Fran anyway?
146
00:06:45,302 --> 00:06:46,335
Isn't she in the shop?
147
00:06:46,336 --> 00:06:47,871
No, I've been
playing solitaire
148
00:06:47,872 --> 00:06:50,910
on the computer
for the last hour.
149
00:06:50,941 --> 00:06:52,108
I don't do well on my own.
150
00:06:52,109 --> 00:06:54,042
I need structure.
151
00:06:54,077 --> 00:06:56,478
I'm gonna see if
her car is here.
152
00:06:56,479 --> 00:06:58,147
You know, she insisted
on going to that
153
00:06:58,148 --> 00:07:00,016
weird party last night.
154
00:07:00,017 --> 00:07:03,019
I don't know
what's gotten into her.
155
00:07:05,857 --> 00:07:09,137
I think I do.
156
00:07:10,863 --> 00:07:14,733
Oh, uh, Adam, this is...
157
00:07:14,767 --> 00:07:16,535
- Peter.
- Peter.
158
00:07:16,536 --> 00:07:18,169
Peter, Adam.
159
00:07:18,170 --> 00:07:22,173
I met Adam at
the ritual party last night.
160
00:07:22,174 --> 00:07:23,608
- Peter.
- Adam.
161
00:07:23,609 --> 00:07:27,511
Hey, Fran told me all about
your, um, living situation.
162
00:07:27,512 --> 00:07:30,247
I think it's beautiful.
163
00:07:30,248 --> 00:07:32,849
Thank you, I'm sure she would
have told me all about you
164
00:07:32,850 --> 00:07:35,786
had she written me a text saying
that she'd be out all night.
165
00:07:35,787 --> 00:07:37,720
Oh, I'm sorry.
166
00:07:37,721 --> 00:07:38,721
I could send you one now.
167
00:07:38,722 --> 00:07:39,856
It'll be much shorter.
168
00:07:39,857 --> 00:07:42,879
Two words.
169
00:07:42,894 --> 00:07:46,229
Last night was magical.
170
00:07:46,230 --> 00:07:47,364
Wasn't it?
171
00:07:47,365 --> 00:07:49,366
Mmm.
172
00:07:52,704 --> 00:07:54,471
- Nice meeting you, Peter.
- Yeah, you too.
173
00:07:54,472 --> 00:07:57,140
I will see you tomorrow,
moonlight.
174
00:07:57,141 --> 00:07:59,610
Aw.
175
00:07:59,611 --> 00:08:04,347
Bye.
176
00:08:04,348 --> 00:08:05,715
Ah.
177
00:08:05,750 --> 00:08:09,319
"Moonlight"? Really?
178
00:08:09,320 --> 00:08:12,288
That's what he calls me
because of my aura.
179
00:08:12,322 --> 00:08:16,259
"Aura" he wants
to get into your pants.
180
00:08:16,293 --> 00:08:18,861
Look, I thought we had a rule,
if one of us gets lucky
181
00:08:18,862 --> 00:08:20,834
or in this case,
unbelievable lucky...
182
00:08:20,864 --> 00:08:22,965
Right?
183
00:08:22,966 --> 00:08:26,339
God, he looks like that
guy on our paper towels.
184
00:08:32,142 --> 00:08:35,678
The point is, we agreed that
we would text each other
185
00:08:35,679 --> 00:08:37,480
if one of us was
not coming home.
186
00:08:37,481 --> 00:08:40,849
Like the time I got locked in
the blockbuster parking lot.
187
00:08:40,850 --> 00:08:45,221
Oh, Peter, I had the best time
with Adam last night.
188
00:08:45,222 --> 00:08:47,569
We walked along
the beach barefoot
189
00:08:47,591 --> 00:08:50,593
and I wasn't even afraid
of getting hepatitis "b".
190
00:08:52,963 --> 00:08:56,198
And he made a big fire
right in the sand.
191
00:08:56,199 --> 00:08:58,705
Well that's against code.
192
00:08:58,735 --> 00:09:00,168
He don't care.
193
00:09:00,169 --> 00:09:01,503
He's a free spirit.
194
00:09:01,537 --> 00:09:04,005
He meditates, he drives a boat,
195
00:09:04,006 --> 00:09:09,444
he wears a necklace made out of
the bones of a sea creature.
196
00:09:09,478 --> 00:09:11,679
Well, it sounds like you two
have a lot in common,
197
00:09:11,680 --> 00:09:13,803
except for everything.
198
00:09:13,815 --> 00:09:16,684
Well, I don't expect
you to understand.
199
00:09:16,685 --> 00:09:23,058
They haven't made
a puzzle about it yet.
200
00:09:23,059 --> 00:09:24,647
Why don't you
just eat your toast?
201
00:09:24,661 --> 00:09:26,024
I'm not hungry.
202
00:09:26,028 --> 00:09:28,230
You don't have an appetite?
203
00:09:28,231 --> 00:09:30,233
Oh, you know what?
204
00:09:30,234 --> 00:09:33,537
I took a great picture of
the sunrise on my cell phone.
205
00:09:33,538 --> 00:09:34,705
Let me...
206
00:09:34,706 --> 00:09:39,662
Oh, I must have left
my purse in his jeep.
207
00:09:39,677 --> 00:09:42,679
Who are you?
208
00:09:49,620 --> 00:09:51,132
Oh, what's all this?
209
00:09:51,155 --> 00:09:52,355
I went shopping.
210
00:09:52,389 --> 00:09:53,423
Oh, really?
211
00:09:53,424 --> 00:09:55,058
Where'd you go? Macy's?
212
00:09:55,059 --> 00:09:56,392
Bloomingdale's?
213
00:09:56,393 --> 00:09:58,723
Afghanistan?
214
00:09:58,729 --> 00:10:01,999
Adam is taking me
camping this weekend.
215
00:10:02,000 --> 00:10:04,903
Shut up.
216
00:10:04,904 --> 00:10:06,371
I didn't say a word.
217
00:10:06,372 --> 00:10:07,372
Ooh, I like that.
218
00:10:07,373 --> 00:10:10,442
You needed a new makeup bag.
219
00:10:10,443 --> 00:10:13,446
For your information,
Adam told me to pack light.
220
00:10:13,447 --> 00:10:15,448
So everything I need
for a weekend
221
00:10:15,449 --> 00:10:18,284
in the forest is right there.
222
00:10:18,286 --> 00:10:20,621
Ms. Fran, I have
the rest of your bags.
223
00:10:20,622 --> 00:10:24,058
Shut up.
224
00:10:24,059 --> 00:10:28,169
Cesar, what did you do?
225
00:10:28,197 --> 00:10:31,132
You put the dog in the bag?
226
00:10:31,167 --> 00:10:35,370
I thought she was
one of your uggs.
227
00:10:35,371 --> 00:10:39,775
Cesar, she's just a poor old
girl looking for love.
228
00:10:39,810 --> 00:10:42,812
Are we still talking
about the dog?
229
00:10:46,917 --> 00:10:50,942
So, moonlight Lovett
is going to rough it?
230
00:10:50,955 --> 00:10:52,819
- Yes I am.
- Mm-hmm.
231
00:10:52,824 --> 00:10:54,858
Fran, you know where you go to
the bathroom in the woods?
232
00:10:54,859 --> 00:10:56,781
In the woods.
233
00:10:56,795 --> 00:11:01,798
Well I don't care because
I... number two too?
234
00:11:03,601 --> 00:11:05,101
Fran, if you're really
serious about going out
235
00:11:05,102 --> 00:11:07,803
into the wilderness with no
electricity and no plumbing,
236
00:11:07,804 --> 00:11:10,753
there is one thing that you must
promise me that you will take.
237
00:11:10,774 --> 00:11:13,715
- What?
- Video.
238
00:11:13,743 --> 00:11:16,044
Why can't I try
something new?
239
00:11:16,045 --> 00:11:18,113
You certainly did.
240
00:11:18,148 --> 00:11:20,883
Being gay is different
than sleeping in a tent.
241
00:11:20,884 --> 00:11:22,285
Except for
brokeback Mountain,
242
00:11:22,286 --> 00:11:24,654
which was super hot.
243
00:11:24,655 --> 00:11:27,562
You know, just because
we never did this
244
00:11:27,592 --> 00:11:29,526
doesn't mean that I never
wanted to do it.
245
00:11:29,527 --> 00:11:32,063
Maybe I always wanted to do it,
but I never got to do it
246
00:11:32,064 --> 00:11:33,693
because you didn't
want to do it.
247
00:11:33,699 --> 00:11:35,099
Give me a break.
248
00:11:35,100 --> 00:11:36,267
When have I ever not let
you do something
249
00:11:36,268 --> 00:11:37,572
that you wanted to do?
250
00:11:37,603 --> 00:11:39,036
Oh, remember the time
I wanted
251
00:11:39,037 --> 00:11:42,327
to keep having sex for
the rest of our lives?
252
00:11:42,340 --> 00:11:44,375
You know, this whole
blame Peter thing?
253
00:11:44,376 --> 00:11:45,538
Getting a little bored
with it.
254
00:11:45,544 --> 00:11:47,077
You think that's boring?
255
00:11:47,078 --> 00:11:48,612
Try living with you.
256
00:11:48,613 --> 00:11:51,814
Hey, at least I accept
who I am, Fran.
257
00:11:51,815 --> 00:11:55,251
You don't find me pretending to
have a good time in the bush.
258
00:12:04,057 --> 00:12:07,126
- Petey!
- Hey.
259
00:12:07,127 --> 00:12:08,428
What's wrong with him?
260
00:12:08,429 --> 00:12:10,964
His wife is camping with
a gorgeous fisherman
261
00:12:10,965 --> 00:12:13,634
up in the big bear.
262
00:12:13,635 --> 00:12:15,603
So what's the problem?
263
00:12:15,604 --> 00:12:17,528
Was he your boyfriend first?
264
00:12:17,539 --> 00:12:21,074
Glen, he's not
my boyfriend.
265
00:12:21,076 --> 00:12:22,743
Maybe he likes younger men.
266
00:12:22,744 --> 00:12:25,613
Maybe a little grecian formula
in the hair...
267
00:12:25,614 --> 00:12:28,316
Are you not listening to me?
268
00:12:28,317 --> 00:12:30,285
Are you not listening?
269
00:12:30,286 --> 00:12:31,819
Sweetheart,
there's a reason why
270
00:12:31,820 --> 00:12:35,323
your wife is in the woods
with your boyfriend.
271
00:12:35,324 --> 00:12:37,125
He's not my boyf...
272
00:12:37,126 --> 00:12:39,425
Why does Fran come here?
273
00:12:39,428 --> 00:12:42,053
- I don't know.
- Beats us.
274
00:12:42,064 --> 00:12:44,332
You guys think I'm boring?
275
00:12:44,333 --> 00:12:46,434
- Oh...
- Boring?
276
00:12:46,435 --> 00:12:48,236
You like women, you like men,
277
00:12:48,237 --> 00:12:49,971
you turned me on
to chicken sausage.
278
00:12:49,972 --> 00:12:52,730
You're anything but boring.
279
00:12:52,742 --> 00:12:54,273
Right?
280
00:12:54,277 --> 00:12:56,812
Peter, sweetheart,
where is this coming from?
281
00:12:56,813 --> 00:12:58,736
From your crazy daughter.
282
00:12:58,748 --> 00:13:00,405
No, no, that does
not sound like her.
283
00:13:00,417 --> 00:13:02,151
Well nothing sounds
like her anymore, Dori.
284
00:13:02,152 --> 00:13:03,820
I don't know who she is.
Honestly.
285
00:13:03,821 --> 00:13:05,989
Why can't things
just stay the same?
286
00:13:05,990 --> 00:13:08,793
Darling, things
never stay the same.
287
00:13:08,794 --> 00:13:11,791
Your wife is growing,
and if you don't grow too,
288
00:13:11,797 --> 00:13:14,460
then she might just
move on without you.
289
00:13:14,466 --> 00:13:17,768
If she leaves me
behind then...
290
00:13:17,769 --> 00:13:21,372
Who am I gonna be with?
291
00:13:21,373 --> 00:13:24,375
You know, we're not
blood-related.
292
00:13:31,183 --> 00:13:34,552
Oi, I'm exhausted here.
293
00:13:34,553 --> 00:13:37,622
Every muscle in my body hurts.
294
00:13:37,623 --> 00:13:41,025
How long was that drive?
295
00:13:41,026 --> 00:13:44,362
Some wine will
make you feel better.
296
00:13:44,363 --> 00:13:46,197
Come on, come on.
297
00:13:46,198 --> 00:13:47,899
Maybe it'll settle
my stomach a little bit.
298
00:13:47,900 --> 00:13:51,622
I'll tell you, that bag of trail
mix is going right through me.
299
00:13:51,637 --> 00:13:53,833
If you wanna use the woods,
I'll come with you.
300
00:13:53,839 --> 00:13:58,543
I would rather die.
301
00:13:58,544 --> 00:14:01,647
Look, Fran, you know we don't
have to stay up here
302
00:14:01,648 --> 00:14:02,633
if you're not feeling it.
303
00:14:02,649 --> 00:14:05,651
No, I'm enjoying myself.
304
00:14:08,354 --> 00:14:12,424
I want the whole
camping experience.
305
00:14:12,425 --> 00:14:14,860
Now what exactly
would that be?
306
00:14:14,861 --> 00:14:19,565
Do you like puzzles?
307
00:14:19,566 --> 00:14:22,867
Kiss me.
308
00:14:23,869 --> 00:14:26,671
What the hell was that?
309
00:14:26,672 --> 00:14:27,872
We're fine.
310
00:14:27,873 --> 00:14:29,494
It's only dangerous if food
is left out.
311
00:14:29,507 --> 00:14:32,997
Oh, okay.
312
00:14:33,010 --> 00:14:36,012
Quick question,
is trail mix food?
313
00:14:38,549 --> 00:14:40,546
Why?
314
00:14:40,551 --> 00:14:42,318
Well, I didn't
want to waste it
315
00:14:42,319 --> 00:14:44,754
so I sprinkled it
outside to feed
316
00:14:44,755 --> 00:14:48,424
the little creatures
of the forest.
317
00:14:48,425 --> 00:14:52,461
Fran, you know
that includes bears.
318
00:14:52,462 --> 00:14:54,597
Like booboo?
319
00:14:54,598 --> 00:14:56,332
Big.
320
00:14:56,333 --> 00:14:59,002
No bowtie.
321
00:14:59,003 --> 00:15:00,303
How could there be bears?
322
00:15:00,304 --> 00:15:03,569
We're only 45 minutes
from the Gucci outlets.
323
00:15:03,575 --> 00:15:05,943
Okay.
324
00:15:07,413 --> 00:15:08,413
Wait, wait!
325
00:15:08,414 --> 00:15:09,414
You're gonna lea me alone
326
00:15:09,415 --> 00:15:10,743
in here with bears out there?
327
00:15:10,750 --> 00:15:11,911
Unless you wanna eome w.
328
00:15:11,918 --> 00:15:13,486
No, no, you go.
329
00:15:13,487 --> 00:15:17,990
I'll get the next one.
330
00:15:17,991 --> 00:15:20,993
Oh, be careful, be careful.
331
00:15:23,163 --> 00:15:26,899
Adam? Adam?
332
00:15:26,900 --> 00:15:29,001
Oh, oh, oh!
333
00:15:29,002 --> 00:15:30,269
I'm gonna die.
334
00:15:30,270 --> 00:15:32,772
Pepper spray, where's my pepper
spray?
335
00:15:32,773 --> 00:15:34,173
Where's the button?
336
00:15:34,174 --> 00:15:36,476
Short spurts,
short spurts.
337
00:15:41,381 --> 00:15:43,916
- Sorry!
- What did you? What did you do?
338
00:15:43,917 --> 00:15:45,251
I thought you were a bear!
339
00:15:45,252 --> 00:15:46,237
I thought you were a bear!
340
00:15:46,253 --> 00:15:47,653
It was a raccoon!
341
00:15:47,654 --> 00:15:48,821
I can't see.
342
00:15:48,822 --> 00:15:50,022
Okay, calm down.
343
00:15:50,023 --> 00:15:52,525
I will drive you
down the Mountain.
344
00:15:52,526 --> 00:15:54,326
Can you drive a four on the
floor and double clutch it?
345
00:15:54,327 --> 00:15:57,330
If it's an automatic.
346
00:16:04,422 --> 00:16:06,790
You like my new hat, Peter?
347
00:16:06,824 --> 00:16:09,826
Yeah, it's perfect
for hunting wabbits.
348
00:16:13,197 --> 00:16:17,367
Well I'm sensing that
you're annoyed and I get it.
349
00:16:17,368 --> 00:16:19,269
I just want to say
that I think
350
00:16:19,270 --> 00:16:20,971
that we're not going
the right way.
351
00:16:20,972 --> 00:16:24,975
I distinctly remember making
a turn at a little baby dear.
352
00:16:26,579 --> 00:16:28,213
You do know they move, Fran.
353
00:16:28,214 --> 00:16:29,648
It's not
the country bear jamboree.
354
00:16:29,649 --> 00:16:33,819
They don't stand in one spot
and play a tambourine.
355
00:16:33,853 --> 00:16:35,187
All right, I'm sorry.
356
00:16:35,188 --> 00:16:36,422
I'm just trying to help.
357
00:16:36,456 --> 00:16:37,957
You know what, I don't need
you help, Fran,
358
00:16:37,958 --> 00:16:40,293
because I googled
the directions.
359
00:16:40,294 --> 00:16:42,295
That's what boring people do.
360
00:16:42,329 --> 00:16:44,464
Oh, I knew you were gonna take
that the wrong way.
361
00:16:44,498 --> 00:16:45,498
Oh, really?
362
00:16:45,499 --> 00:16:46,499
"You're boring."
363
00:16:46,500 --> 00:16:47,633
If you were a drag queen,
364
00:16:47,634 --> 00:16:49,268
"your name would be
melba toast."
365
00:16:49,302 --> 00:16:52,671
Exactly how am I
supposed to take that?
366
00:16:52,672 --> 00:16:54,606
I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
367
00:16:54,607 --> 00:16:56,941
I just, you know,
I got scared.
368
00:16:56,942 --> 00:17:00,377
I saw myself sitting in that
house 20 years from now.
369
00:17:00,378 --> 00:17:01,712
So I'm not a camper.
370
00:17:01,713 --> 00:17:03,647
But I took some risks.
371
00:17:03,648 --> 00:17:04,949
I grew as a person.
372
00:17:04,950 --> 00:17:06,851
It's not like anybody
got hurt.
373
00:17:06,852 --> 00:17:09,988
Hello?
374
00:17:09,989 --> 00:17:12,457
Adam, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
375
00:17:12,458 --> 00:17:16,195
Somebody's fisherman
is a little crabby.
376
00:17:16,229 --> 00:17:17,863
Did you do something
to your hair?
377
00:17:17,898 --> 00:17:19,799
... no.
378
00:17:19,833 --> 00:17:22,903
- Yes, you did.
- No, I didn't.
379
00:17:22,904 --> 00:17:26,507
Oh, my God.
380
00:17:26,508 --> 00:17:28,509
Why?
381
00:17:28,544 --> 00:17:31,512
I thought it would make me
look boyish.
382
00:17:31,513 --> 00:17:36,316
Yeah, Bob's big boy-ish.
383
00:17:36,317 --> 00:17:39,319
Adam, I wish
you could see this.
384
00:17:42,257 --> 00:17:44,791
Oh, Peter, you listened to me
385
00:17:44,792 --> 00:17:47,027
and you tried to change too.
386
00:17:47,028 --> 00:17:50,296
That's so sweet.
387
00:17:50,331 --> 00:17:52,332
Well, when you said
you were growing,
388
00:17:52,333 --> 00:17:55,402
I thought I better grow too or
I'm gonna lose my best friend.
389
00:17:55,436 --> 00:17:57,738
Oh, honey.
390
00:17:57,739 --> 00:18:01,408
I never wanted you to feel
like you would lose me.
391
00:18:01,409 --> 00:18:05,079
I always go to such extremes.
392
00:18:05,080 --> 00:18:09,917
Parties at 10:00,
poopin' in the woods...
393
00:18:09,918 --> 00:18:12,853
Why do I have to
be such a wildcat?
394
00:18:12,854 --> 00:18:16,756
If I want to expand my horizons,
I should start small.
395
00:18:16,757 --> 00:18:18,491
Like with a pottery class.
396
00:18:18,525 --> 00:18:19,559
Oh, I'd love that.
397
00:18:19,560 --> 00:18:20,726
That sounds fun.
398
00:18:20,761 --> 00:18:22,161
Right?
399
00:18:22,195 --> 00:18:23,529
So we're both growing.
400
00:18:23,563 --> 00:18:26,032
Yeah, we are,
and the important thing
401
00:18:26,033 --> 00:18:27,800
is there's an in-n-out burger.
402
00:18:27,801 --> 00:18:29,301
Pull over, I'm starving.
403
00:18:29,302 --> 00:18:30,870
You people are crazy,
I am blind!
404
00:18:30,871 --> 00:18:32,138
I need to go to the hospital!
405
00:18:32,139 --> 00:18:33,306
Oh, of course.
406
00:18:33,307 --> 00:18:35,008
Of course, Adam.
407
00:18:35,009 --> 00:18:37,711
Sorry.
408
00:18:48,623 --> 00:18:50,257
What's the matter, sweetie?
409
00:18:50,292 --> 00:18:54,995
I'm just thinking about how
far we've come.
410
00:18:54,996 --> 00:18:57,731
We're different people now.
411
00:18:57,732 --> 00:19:01,735
And we had to go to hell
and back to get here.
412
00:19:03,308 --> 00:19:05,538
Well, change is always
painful.
413
00:19:05,539 --> 00:19:09,943
Now is this an eye or a nipple?
414
00:19:09,944 --> 00:19:12,545
In its lifetime,
the albatross will fly
415
00:19:12,546 --> 00:19:14,848
enormous distances
over the ocean.
416
00:19:14,849 --> 00:19:16,817
But despite
its extensive travels,
417
00:19:16,818 --> 00:19:18,185
she will always return
418
00:19:18,186 --> 00:19:20,721
to the same place
and the same partner
419
00:19:20,722 --> 00:19:23,924
until death.
420
00:19:23,959 --> 00:19:26,961
What a schmucky bird.
421
00:19:29,531 --> 00:19:32,600
The male secures his bond with
the female through the use
422
00:19:32,601 --> 00:19:36,371
of a goofy but affectionate
dance which enthralls her.
423
00:19:36,372 --> 00:19:38,273
I got it, I got my corner!
424
00:19:38,274 --> 00:19:41,276
-
I got my corner
- Yay.
425
00:19:41,277 --> 00:19:45,071
Sync & corrections by Rafael UPD
www.addic7ed.com/
426
00:19:45,121 --> 00:19:49,671
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
30171
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
