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1
00:00:03,212 --> 00:00:04,546
All right, Stan.
2
00:00:04,755 --> 00:00:07,466
Another day,
another random body pain.
3
00:00:07,674 --> 00:00:10,344
Here we go.
( grunting and groaning )
4
00:00:10,552 --> 00:00:12,679
Uhh!
5
00:00:12,888 --> 00:00:13,972
MABEL: Dear Stan,
6
00:00:14,181 --> 00:00:15,140
I needed something
to carry milk in,
7
00:00:15,349 --> 00:00:17,851
so I used your slippers.
Love, Mabel.
8
00:00:18,060 --> 00:00:19,186
Uhh!
9
00:00:19,394 --> 00:00:21,647
( Sloshing )
10
00:00:24,525 --> 00:00:26,068
Ahh.
11
00:00:29,404 --> 00:00:30,989
DIPPER: Dear Stan,
I took these
12
00:00:31,198 --> 00:00:33,075
to build a planetarium suit
for Soos.
13
00:00:33,242 --> 00:00:34,952
Sorry! Dipper.
14
00:00:35,118 --> 00:00:36,411
Uhh!
15
00:00:38,914 --> 00:00:40,332
Whoa, let's not take this line.
16
00:00:40,541 --> 00:00:42,125
There's an old person in it.
Pshht!
17
00:00:42,334 --> 00:00:43,919
Yeah, he's probably
gonna pay with,
18
00:00:44,127 --> 00:00:46,088
like, pennies
and war bonds.
19
00:00:46,296 --> 00:00:47,756
Hey! For your information,
20
00:00:47,923 --> 00:00:49,591
I was gonna shoplift
most of this!
21
00:00:49,800 --> 00:00:51,885
Security!
22
00:00:52,094 --> 00:00:54,012
Hahh! Smoke bomb!
23
00:00:56,473 --> 00:00:58,016
Aw, seriously?
24
00:01:01,228 --> 00:01:03,063
Ahh. Rough start to a day,
25
00:01:03,272 --> 00:01:04,523
but it's all
gonna be worth it
26
00:01:04,731 --> 00:01:06,858
when I fix that light bulb.
27
00:01:07,067 --> 00:01:08,777
And we're done.
28
00:01:08,986 --> 00:01:10,237
( All cheering)
29
00:01:10,404 --> 00:01:11,863
Does everyone see this?
30
00:01:12,072 --> 00:01:14,032
This is what a hero
looks like right here.
31
00:01:14,199 --> 00:01:16,034
I thought we were
out of light bulbs.
32
00:01:16,201 --> 00:01:18,370
Oh, we were.
So I invented my own.
33
00:01:18,579 --> 00:01:20,038
It will last a thousand years,
34
00:01:20,205 --> 00:01:21,999
and the light it emits
makes your skin softer.
35
00:01:22,207 --> 00:01:23,125
Oh!
36
00:01:23,333 --> 00:01:25,252
Never have I known
such softness.
37
00:01:25,544 --> 00:01:26,712
Anyway, where were you?
38
00:01:29,881 --> 00:01:32,926
Well, TV, at least you appreciate me.
Give me the good news.
39
00:01:33,135 --> 00:01:35,721
WOMAN: This just in:
The mayor is dead.
40
00:01:35,929 --> 00:01:37,931
What?!
Whoa! What's goin' on?
41
00:01:38,140 --> 00:01:39,766
Raised by bears
in the wilderness,
42
00:01:39,975 --> 00:01:41,977
Mayor Eustace "Huckabone"
Befufftlefumpter
43
00:01:42,185 --> 00:01:43,854
was best known for
raising the water tower,
44
00:01:44,062 --> 00:01:45,564
possibly starting World War I,
45
00:01:45,772 --> 00:01:47,983
and putting town menace
Gideon Gleeful behind bars--
46
00:01:48,191 --> 00:01:50,986
in actual adult prison.
47
00:01:51,194 --> 00:01:53,238
A memorial statue
is already being carved
48
00:01:53,447 --> 00:01:55,866
in the deceased mayor's honor.
49
00:01:56,074 --> 00:01:57,951
( sobbing )
50
00:01:58,160 --> 00:02:01,288
I'm sorry. It's just been so
long since we've had real news.
51
00:02:01,496 --> 00:02:03,415
I'm just so happy!
52
00:02:03,624 --> 00:02:05,542
There will be a Town Hall
meeting this afternoon
53
00:02:05,751 --> 00:02:07,002
to discuss replacing him.
54
00:02:07,210 --> 00:02:08,211
New mayor, huh?
55
00:02:08,420 --> 00:02:11,298
Wonder who it could be...
56
00:02:11,506 --> 00:02:13,634
N'
57
00:02:29,066 --> 00:02:31,443
All right, order, everyone!
( banging gavel )
58
00:02:31,652 --> 00:02:33,445
( laughing ) Calm down, now.
59
00:02:33,654 --> 00:02:37,032
We're here to choose a mayor
for the first time in almost a century.
60
00:02:37,199 --> 00:02:39,743
According to
the town charter,
61
00:02:39,951 --> 00:02:43,288
a worthy candidate is defined as
anyone who can cast a shadow,
62
00:02:43,497 --> 00:02:46,249
count to ten, and throw their hat
into the provided ring.
63
00:02:48,835 --> 00:02:52,464
Well, now, I do believe
I fulfill all the requirements.
64
00:02:52,673 --> 00:02:54,675
Wait. Bud Gleeful?
He looks good,
65
00:02:54,841 --> 00:02:56,885
considering we threw
his son in jail.
66
00:02:57,094 --> 00:02:58,220
That was a good day.
67
00:02:58,428 --> 00:03:00,097
Now, folks, I know
our family's had
68
00:03:00,305 --> 00:03:02,391
its fair share of
whoopsie-daisies in the past,
69
00:03:02,599 --> 00:03:05,394
but I'd like to make up
for it by formally announcing
70
00:03:05,560 --> 00:03:08,146
my candidacy for
the mayor of Gravity Falls!
71
00:03:08,355 --> 00:03:09,523
Any questions?
72
00:03:09,731 --> 00:03:13,026
Yes. Are you still in contact
with Little Gideon?
73
00:03:13,235 --> 00:03:15,028
That's a great question!
74
00:03:15,237 --> 00:03:17,322
I'm giving you fifty percent
off a used car.
75
00:03:17,531 --> 00:03:20,826
Fifty percent?
Fifty percent?!
76
00:03:21,034 --> 00:03:23,161
In fact, everyone
look under your seats.
77
00:03:23,370 --> 00:03:24,955
You get half off a used car,
78
00:03:25,122 --> 00:03:27,541
-you get half off a used car...
- Better than cash!
79
00:03:27,749 --> 00:03:31,878
Wow! A colorful piece of paper!
He's got my vote.
80
00:03:32,087 --> 00:03:33,630
Guys, I've got
a really bad feeling
81
00:03:33,839 --> 00:03:35,424
about Bud Gleeful
as mayor.
82
00:03:35,632 --> 00:03:37,134
I don't know, dude,
it's not like we have
83
00:03:37,342 --> 00:03:38,927
a lot of good mayor options.
84
00:03:39,136 --> 00:03:40,804
Everyone in this town
is a tad strange,
85
00:03:41,012 --> 00:03:42,973
except, ironically,
Tad Strange.
86
00:03:43,181 --> 00:03:46,685
Hi, guys. Tad's the name,
and being normal's my game.
87
00:03:46,893 --> 00:03:47,894
Loving you, Tad!
88
00:03:48,103 --> 00:03:49,396
And I love bread.
89
00:03:49,563 --> 00:03:51,565
It's a shame Ford isn't here.
90
00:03:51,773 --> 00:03:52,983
He'd run and win
91
00:03:53,191 --> 00:03:55,777
and be a great mayor.
92
00:03:55,986 --> 00:03:57,404
So, since everyone's happy,
93
00:03:57,612 --> 00:03:58,989
I'll just take
the oath of office now,
94
00:03:59,197 --> 00:04:00,907
sound good? Gavel up.
95
00:04:01,116 --> 00:04:02,993
( All gasp )
Hold it right there, Bud!
96
00:04:03,160 --> 00:04:05,078
I'm taking you on!
97
00:04:05,287 --> 00:04:07,414
Stanford? No offense,
98
00:04:07,622 --> 00:04:09,624
but you're just some
two-bit carnival barker,
99
00:04:09,833 --> 00:04:12,085
and your head is more ears
than face!
100
00:04:12,294 --> 00:04:17,424
Oh, yeah? Well, your face
is more fat than...not fat!
101
00:04:17,632 --> 00:04:18,967
( All gasp )
102
00:04:19,176 --> 00:04:20,218
Oh, snap.
103
00:04:20,427 --> 00:04:21,428
What do you say, folks?
104
00:04:21,636 --> 00:04:23,180
Are we just gonna
let Bud win?
105
00:04:23,388 --> 00:04:24,806
How about a real election?
106
00:04:25,015 --> 00:04:26,516
Get in there, hat!
107
00:04:26,683 --> 00:04:29,478
( Spectators cheering )
108
00:04:29,686 --> 00:04:32,189
Well, looks like we got
some competition here, folks.
109
00:04:32,397 --> 00:04:34,107
Which I'm fine with,
totally fine with.
110
00:04:34,316 --> 00:04:37,569
I was gonna let
bygones be bygones, Stan,
111
00:04:37,778 --> 00:04:39,905
but you just made
a powerful enemy.
112
00:04:40,113 --> 00:04:41,990
I'll win either way,
and when I do,
113
00:04:42,199 --> 00:04:44,951
you might not like the
Gravity Falls you wake up in.
114
00:04:46,077 --> 00:04:46,995
( Both gasp )
115
00:04:47,162 --> 00:04:51,374
ALL: Election! Election!
Election!
116
00:04:51,583 --> 00:04:53,293
Hee hee hee hee!
117
00:04:53,502 --> 00:04:55,545
Let the madness begin!
118
00:04:58,173 --> 00:05:00,425
Grunkle Stan,
what are you doing?!
119
00:05:00,634 --> 00:05:01,676
Running for mayor.
120
00:05:01,843 --> 00:05:03,470
Did I--
Did I not make that clear?
121
00:05:03,678 --> 00:05:06,181
Grunkle Stan, it's not that
we think you can't do it,
122
00:05:06,389 --> 00:05:07,933
it's just...
No, no, it's okay, Mabel.
123
00:05:08,141 --> 00:05:09,893
We don't think you can do it.
124
00:05:10,101 --> 00:05:12,896
Look, kids, the mayor kicking
the bucket got me thinking.
125
00:05:13,104 --> 00:05:15,357
I'm an old man
and I'm not getting any younger.
126
00:05:15,565 --> 00:05:18,443
My dumb brother's research is
probably gonna make him famous,
127
00:05:18,652 --> 00:05:20,570
and what do I have
to show for my life?
128
00:05:20,779 --> 00:05:23,073
Do I really want "crooked grifter"
on my tombstone?
129
00:05:23,240 --> 00:05:25,158
How about "crooked mayor"?
130
00:05:25,367 --> 00:05:27,327
Psst. Mabel, let's talk.
131
00:05:27,536 --> 00:05:29,371
I know Stan isn't
the best candidate--
132
00:05:29,579 --> 00:05:31,998
heck, he's committing
voter fraud right now--
133
00:05:33,458 --> 00:05:35,335
but Bud's definitely
up to something,
134
00:05:35,544 --> 00:05:36,962
and we're the only ones
who can stop him.
135
00:05:37,170 --> 00:05:38,255
You're right, Dipper.
136
00:05:38,463 --> 00:05:40,882
Besides, Stan has
a kind of charisma.
137
00:05:41,091 --> 00:05:43,301
How hard could
getting him elected be?
138
00:05:46,930 --> 00:05:48,765
Spread the word, pig.
139
00:05:48,974 --> 00:05:51,476
All right, everybody,
eyes up here.
140
00:05:52,644 --> 00:05:54,104
Okay, Gravity Falls elections
141
00:05:54,312 --> 00:05:55,480
are based on two events:
142
00:05:55,689 --> 00:05:59,192
the Wednesday Stump Speech,
held on an actual stump,
143
00:05:59,359 --> 00:06:01,987
and the Friday Debate, wherein
townsfolk throw bird seed
144
00:06:02,195 --> 00:06:03,780
at the candidate they like most.
145
00:06:03,989 --> 00:06:06,324
At the end, they release
a Freedom Eagle,
146
00:06:06,533 --> 00:06:08,535
who will fly to the candidate
covered in more seed
147
00:06:08,743 --> 00:06:10,954
and bestow a birdly kiss
upon him,
148
00:06:11,121 --> 00:06:13,957
anointing him mayor.
149
00:06:14,124 --> 00:06:16,001
I couldn't make this up
if I wanted to.
150
00:06:16,209 --> 00:06:18,044
( Phone rings )
Okay, Grunkle Stan,
151
00:06:18,253 --> 00:06:20,338
are you ready for
your first radio interview?
152
00:06:20,547 --> 00:06:21,923
I got my mouth, don't I?
153
00:06:22,132 --> 00:06:24,843
Okay, you're on
with the candidate.
154
00:06:25,051 --> 00:06:26,344
ANNOUNCER:
You're listening to Falls Radio,
155
00:06:26,553 --> 00:06:28,763
24-hour news
and bear rampage alerts.
156
00:06:28,972 --> 00:06:31,558
And now, here's the-T Man!
157
00:06:31,766 --> 00:06:32,934
TOBY: Hello.
158
00:06:33,143 --> 00:06:34,853
Candidate Stan,
first question:
159
00:06:35,061 --> 00:06:37,939
How do you feel
about the American flag?
160
00:06:38,148 --> 00:06:39,399
STAN: Eh. I can
take it or leave it.
161
00:06:39,608 --> 00:06:41,735
Too many stripes.
Next question?
162
00:06:41,943 --> 00:06:43,862
(all grumbling)
I don't know about that.
163
00:06:44,070 --> 00:06:46,865
What would you do
to help educate our kids?
164
00:06:47,073 --> 00:06:48,992
Heh! Simple.
Put 'em on an island
165
00:06:49,159 --> 00:06:50,243
and make 'em
fight for dominance.
166
00:06:50,452 --> 00:06:52,245
STAN:
Also teach kids swears.
167
00:06:52,454 --> 00:06:54,789
That'll bring 'em
into the real world.
168
00:06:54,998 --> 00:06:57,918
What would you do about
the crime in Gravity Falls?
169
00:06:58,126 --> 00:06:59,878
Wait. Do you mean
crime in general,
170
00:07:00,045 --> 00:07:02,422
or just the specific crimes
committed by m--
171
00:07:02,631 --> 00:07:05,008
( dial tone )
Okay, interview's over.
172
00:07:05,216 --> 00:07:06,676
Candy, what's the damage?
173
00:07:06,843 --> 00:07:08,678
Your approval rating
started at zero.
174
00:07:08,887 --> 00:07:10,722
Now it's a number
lower than zero.
175
00:07:10,931 --> 00:07:12,057
You're meme-ing fast,
176
00:07:12,265 --> 00:07:13,892
and none of them are good.
177
00:07:14,100 --> 00:07:16,937
Look, Grunkle Stan,
people are like smell markers,
178
00:07:17,145 --> 00:07:18,813
and you're black licorice.
179
00:07:19,022 --> 00:07:20,148
It's not that
you're unsniffable,
180
00:07:20,357 --> 00:07:23,026
you just need to learn
when to keep the cap on.
181
00:07:23,234 --> 00:07:26,905
From now on, maybe you should
just read our prepared remarks.
182
00:07:27,113 --> 00:07:28,865
Heh heh! Sorry, kids.
183
00:07:29,074 --> 00:07:31,117
I only say words
that come out of my brain.
184
00:07:31,326 --> 00:07:33,954
If my head says, "That lady's
got an ugly baby,"
185
00:07:34,120 --> 00:07:37,374
my mouth says, "Whoa, lady!
You got one ugly baby!"
186
00:07:39,209 --> 00:07:41,753
And he's insisting
on speaking his mind!
187
00:07:41,920 --> 00:07:43,797
So this is an emergency.
188
00:07:44,005 --> 00:07:45,715
The Stump Speech
is in a couple of days,
189
00:07:45,882 --> 00:07:48,802
and if he continues like this,
we'll lose to Bud for sure.
190
00:07:49,010 --> 00:07:50,887
Hmm. It's a shame
there isn't some device
191
00:07:51,096 --> 00:07:53,056
that would allow you to control
someone else.
192
00:07:53,264 --> 00:07:54,557
Oh, wait. Of course.
193
00:07:54,724 --> 00:07:55,850
Yes. There is.
194
00:07:56,059 --> 00:07:57,727
A long time ago
I designed a prototype
195
00:07:57,936 --> 00:07:59,270
for Ronald Reagan's masters.
196
00:07:59,479 --> 00:08:00,647
Just get Stan to wear this,
197
00:08:00,855 --> 00:08:03,525
and you can make him
a literal talking head.
198
00:08:03,733 --> 00:08:05,902
Whoa! This is amazing!
199
00:08:06,111 --> 00:08:07,904
And ethically ambiguous!
200
00:08:08,113 --> 00:08:09,906
As long as you wear
the matching one,
201
00:08:10,115 --> 00:08:11,908
he'll say and do
whatever you want him to.
202
00:08:12,117 --> 00:08:13,201
Thank you, Great Uncle Ford!
203
00:08:13,410 --> 00:08:16,121
Yes, yes. Use it
responsibly and all.
204
00:08:18,873 --> 00:08:20,959
Whoa, thanks for
the slammin' tie, dudes.
205
00:08:21,167 --> 00:08:23,378
These stripes
are so slimming.
206
00:08:23,586 --> 00:08:26,965
You really think this mind
control tie is gonna work?
207
00:08:27,173 --> 00:08:28,758
Flip the switch
and test it out.
208
00:08:30,593 --> 00:08:31,720
Whoa!
209
00:08:31,928 --> 00:08:34,014
BOTH:
Oh oh oh,
I'm a dancing dude
210
00:08:34,222 --> 00:08:37,434
I got the fancy moves
and a bad attitude
211
00:08:37,600 --> 00:08:39,561
Ohh!
212
00:08:39,769 --> 00:08:41,896
Ha! That's amazing!
213
00:08:42,105 --> 00:08:44,190
Guys! Something weird
just happened.
214
00:08:44,399 --> 00:08:45,692
I'm really freaked out!
215
00:08:45,900 --> 00:08:49,738
BOTH: I am Soos-tron.
Watch me eat this pinecone.
216
00:08:49,946 --> 00:08:51,990
Mind control is awesome!
217
00:08:52,198 --> 00:08:53,575
( Panting ) Oh, my gosh!
218
00:08:53,783 --> 00:08:57,078
My life just flashed
before my eyes! Ohh!
219
00:08:58,288 --> 00:09:00,373
Education? Git it!
220
00:09:00,582 --> 00:09:02,417
Prosperity? Git it!
221
00:09:02,625 --> 00:09:04,711
A Gravity Falls
we can be proud of?
222
00:09:04,919 --> 00:09:06,171
Git it!!!
223
00:09:08,339 --> 00:09:10,008
Do I really have
to wear this thing?
224
00:09:10,216 --> 00:09:12,010
It looks like a flag
threw up on me.
225
00:09:12,218 --> 00:09:14,679
Grunkle Stan,
just trust your lucky tie.
226
00:09:14,888 --> 00:09:17,057
BLUBS: And now,
Stanford Pines!
227
00:09:17,265 --> 00:09:19,642
You're on, Grunkle Stan!
228
00:09:19,851 --> 00:09:22,979
Okay, we'll only jump in
if he starts doing badly.
229
00:09:23,188 --> 00:09:24,898
Hiya there! Stan Pines here.
230
00:09:25,106 --> 00:09:27,859
Let's get real. Do you think
the women of Gravity Falls
231
00:09:28,068 --> 00:09:29,694
wear too much makeup?
232
00:09:29,903 --> 00:09:31,613
Jump in! Jump in!
233
00:09:31,821 --> 00:09:34,365
Uhh! Uh,
what I meant to say was,
234
00:09:34,574 --> 00:09:36,201
you ladies all look great.
235
00:09:36,409 --> 00:09:37,994
And have you done something
with your hair?
236
00:09:38,161 --> 00:09:40,455
Girl, you are workin' it!
237
00:09:40,663 --> 00:09:44,375
That is exactly what I needed
to hear right now!
238
00:09:44,584 --> 00:09:46,461
Whew!
BOTH: I'm Stan Pines.
239
00:09:46,669 --> 00:09:49,380
You may know me as that guy
who accidentally let all those bees loose
240
00:09:49,589 --> 00:09:51,591
in that elementary school
a few years back.
241
00:09:53,676 --> 00:09:54,886
But I believe in things.
242
00:09:55,095 --> 00:09:56,471
America. Freedom.
243
00:09:56,679 --> 00:09:57,680
Ameri-Freedom.
244
00:09:57,889 --> 00:10:00,517
Good. He's saying
all the right things.
245
00:10:00,683 --> 00:10:02,102
Like my opponent
pointed out,
246
00:10:02,310 --> 00:10:03,770
I may not have
a pretty face,
247
00:10:03,978 --> 00:10:05,855
but if you want a candidate
that will listen to you,
248
00:10:06,064 --> 00:10:09,317
well, I'm proud
to be all ears.
249
00:10:09,484 --> 00:10:10,902
( Approving chatter )
250
00:10:11,111 --> 00:10:13,863
Now watch me break it down!
251
00:10:14,072 --> 00:10:16,407
( Hip-hop instrumental plays )
J" Oh, yeah J"
252
00:10:18,034 --> 00:10:20,036
(Ghee Uhh!
I'
253
00:10:20,203 --> 00:10:21,746
( panting )
254
00:10:25,667 --> 00:10:27,961
Grunkle Stan,
that was amazing!
255
00:10:28,169 --> 00:10:30,004
Yeah! How'd you do it,
Mr. Pines?
256
00:10:30,213 --> 00:10:31,381
Uh, I don't know.
257
00:10:31,589 --> 00:10:33,591
I just opened my mouth
and spoke from the heart.
258
00:10:33,800 --> 00:10:35,635
Or gut. Or something.
259
00:10:35,802 --> 00:10:36,886
What is that sound?
260
00:10:37,095 --> 00:10:39,389
Why are people
jamming their hands together?
261
00:10:39,597 --> 00:10:41,015
It's applause!
262
00:10:41,224 --> 00:10:43,518
Grunkle Stan,
they love you!
263
00:10:43,685 --> 00:10:46,104
They... love me?
264
00:10:46,312 --> 00:10:49,023
CHANTING: Stan! Stan! Stan!
265
00:10:50,400 --> 00:10:53,278
There he is! Mr. Pines,
can we get a picture?
266
00:10:53,486 --> 00:10:55,572
ALL: Yes we Stan!
267
00:10:55,780 --> 00:10:58,783
( No audible dialogue)
268
00:11:07,000 --> 00:11:08,334
Doggone it!
269
00:11:08,543 --> 00:11:10,962
Gosh heck huckleberry
honeysuckle darn it!
270
00:11:11,171 --> 00:11:12,922
Excuse my language.
I'm so sorry.
271
00:11:13,131 --> 00:11:15,133
Oh, this is bad.
This is real bad.
272
00:11:15,341 --> 00:11:17,719
I need to speak with
my campaign manager.
273
00:11:17,927 --> 00:11:20,930
Please excuse me
for a moment.
274
00:11:21,139 --> 00:11:23,474
Look, I'm sorry
about all this.
275
00:11:23,641 --> 00:11:25,977
This is a minor setback,
but we'll win,
276
00:11:26,186 --> 00:11:27,395
I'm sure of it.
277
00:11:27,562 --> 00:11:29,522
GIDEON: Minor setback?
278
00:11:29,731 --> 00:11:31,524
Minor setback?!
279
00:11:31,733 --> 00:11:33,693
You listen, Daddy,
and you listen good.
280
00:11:33,902 --> 00:11:34,986
Prison is a nightmare!
281
00:11:35,195 --> 00:11:36,946
I eat the same slop every day!
282
00:11:37,155 --> 00:11:39,240
They have no hair products
in here!
283
00:11:39,449 --> 00:11:42,952
I can't sleep because my cellmate
took my pillow for a wife!
284
00:11:43,119 --> 00:11:45,246
You think I've been
having fun in here?!
285
00:11:45,455 --> 00:11:48,958
Hey, best friend! Don't be late for
Friendship Bracelet class!
286
00:11:49,125 --> 00:11:52,503
I have fingerpainting
at the same time!
287
00:11:52,712 --> 00:11:54,839
The mayor dying's
my one ticket out of here,
288
00:11:55,048 --> 00:11:56,966
which is why you're gonna
win this election,
289
00:11:57,175 --> 00:11:59,385
pardon me out of prison, and
we're not gonna let the Pines
290
00:11:59,594 --> 00:12:01,930
get in my way again!
291
00:12:02,138 --> 00:12:03,431
But-- but you don't understand.
292
00:12:03,640 --> 00:12:06,517
He's going great in the polls.
It's almost like magic.
293
00:12:06,726 --> 00:12:09,145
Magic, you say.
294
00:12:09,354 --> 00:12:12,190
Well, maybe it's time
we fight fire with fire.
295
00:12:12,398 --> 00:12:14,317
I been saving this
for a long time,
296
00:12:14,525 --> 00:12:16,527
waiting for the right moment.
297
00:12:16,736 --> 00:12:18,821
Boy, now, we discussed this.
298
00:12:19,030 --> 00:12:20,531
No more spooky spells.
299
00:12:20,740 --> 00:12:22,158
Well, Daddy,
300
00:12:22,325 --> 00:12:26,037
maybe you just need to have
more of an open mind.
301
00:12:26,204 --> 00:12:30,416
( Speaking ancient language )
302
00:12:30,625 --> 00:12:33,002
No, boy, not that!
303
00:12:33,211 --> 00:12:35,046
Anything but that!
304
00:12:35,255 --> 00:12:38,091
Aaaaah!!!
305
00:12:41,094 --> 00:12:42,929
( Disco beat plays )
Ooh, it's him!
306
00:12:45,974 --> 00:12:47,934
Lookin' good,
mayor candidate.
307
00:12:48,142 --> 00:12:50,144
Hooeey! It's the guy
I'm gonna vote for!
308
00:12:50,353 --> 00:12:53,022
Lookin' A-OK, Stanford, A-OK.
309
00:12:53,231 --> 00:12:55,817
Tad, that means so much
coming from you.
310
00:12:56,025 --> 00:12:57,402
HEY-O!
311
00:12:57,610 --> 00:12:59,320
ALL: Stan!
312
00:12:59,529 --> 00:13:01,072
Now just the ladies.
313
00:13:01,239 --> 00:13:02,198
WOMEN: Stan!
314
00:13:02,407 --> 00:13:03,866
Now just the ladies my age.
315
00:13:04,075 --> 00:13:05,076
Stan!
316
00:13:05,243 --> 00:13:06,244
Woof! Never mind.
317
00:13:07,704 --> 00:13:10,873
On the house,
Mr. Big Shot.
318
00:13:11,040 --> 00:13:12,667
Now, this I could get used to.
319
00:13:12,875 --> 00:13:14,335
Grunkle Stan,
what's with the outfit?
320
00:13:14,544 --> 00:13:15,878
You're missing
your lucky tie.
321
00:13:16,087 --> 00:13:16,921
Power tie.
Gotta wear it.
322
00:13:17,130 --> 00:13:18,840
Come on,
have you seen the polls?
323
00:13:19,048 --> 00:13:20,925
I could debate naked
and I'd still win.
324
00:13:21,134 --> 00:13:22,885
Huh. Come to think of it...
325
00:13:23,094 --> 00:13:24,721
Ha ha. Seriously, though,
326
00:13:24,929 --> 00:13:27,098
we need you to wear
that suit and tie.
327
00:13:27,307 --> 00:13:29,100
Suit and tie.
Gotta wear it.
328
00:13:29,309 --> 00:13:32,103
Uhh! Why do you kids have to
constantly tell me what to do?
329
00:13:32,312 --> 00:13:34,647
Everyone in this town
is finally showing me respect--
330
00:13:34,856 --> 00:13:36,607
maybe you kids should, too.
331
00:13:36,816 --> 00:13:39,819
Grunkle Stan, we'd respect you
if you took things more seriously.
332
00:13:40,028 --> 00:13:41,446
I am taking this
seriously!
333
00:13:41,654 --> 00:13:42,947
If you haven't noticed,
334
00:13:43,156 --> 00:13:44,032
everything's that's come out
of this golden mouth
335
00:13:44,198 --> 00:13:46,617
has put us on top, with
or without your dumb advice!
336
00:13:46,826 --> 00:13:48,661
Dumb advice?!
Yeah!
337
00:13:48,870 --> 00:13:50,830
Dumb advice.
Dang it, Stan!
338
00:13:51,039 --> 00:13:53,666
Every one of those speeches
we were controlling you!
339
00:13:53,875 --> 00:13:55,335
Dipper!
What?!
340
00:13:55,543 --> 00:13:58,421
This tie is a mind control device
invented by Ford.
341
00:13:58,629 --> 00:14:01,049
If it wasn't for this tie,
you'd be losing!
342
00:14:03,051 --> 00:14:05,011
Well, you can tell
that know-it-all Ford
343
00:14:05,219 --> 00:14:07,889
that he can keep his fancy
light bulbs and magic ties.
344
00:14:08,097 --> 00:14:10,433
I'm gonna win this debate
on my own, without any of you!
345
00:14:10,600 --> 00:14:12,268
Stan, wait! You can't!
346
00:14:14,312 --> 00:14:15,688
Oh, this is bad.
347
00:14:15,897 --> 00:14:18,608
If we want to beat Bud,
we need another candidate, fast.
348
00:14:18,816 --> 00:14:20,234
What we need is
a blank slate,
349
00:14:20,401 --> 00:14:21,986
someone totally suggestible,
350
00:14:22,195 --> 00:14:25,156
an empty piece of clay
we can mold to our whims.
351
00:14:25,323 --> 00:14:26,491
Hey, a little help,
dudes?
352
00:14:26,699 --> 00:14:28,701
I accidentally got my head
stuck in my shirt sleeve.
353
00:14:28,910 --> 00:14:31,412
I guess this is my life now.
354
00:14:33,498 --> 00:14:35,917
Seed here!
Support your favorite candidate
355
00:14:36,125 --> 00:14:38,336
by throwing election seed!
356
00:14:38,544 --> 00:14:40,129
Welcome, all,
to the final debate
357
00:14:40,338 --> 00:14:42,131
in what's sure to be,
on a cosmic scale,
358
00:14:42,340 --> 00:14:44,342
a forgettable blip
in human history.
359
00:14:44,550 --> 00:14:47,637
And here come the three
more popular candidates!
360
00:14:47,804 --> 00:14:50,098
Oh! Hello there, Stanford.
361
00:14:50,306 --> 00:14:53,726
Long time no see.
Hee hee. Whoo-hoo-hoo!
362
00:14:53,935 --> 00:14:57,021
Don't you "tee-hee" me.
I'll debate you into the ground!
363
00:14:57,230 --> 00:15:01,192
Oh, but I have a widdle twick
up my sweevie-weeves.
364
00:15:01,359 --> 00:15:03,861
You're making me very
uncomfortable right now.
365
00:15:04,070 --> 00:15:05,655
ANNOUNCER:
But what's this?
366
00:15:05,863 --> 00:15:08,366
One new candidate
has entered the race!
367
00:15:08,574 --> 00:15:10,118
Wait a minute. What?!
368
00:15:12,995 --> 00:15:14,622
Those backstabbing...
369
00:15:14,831 --> 00:15:17,083
Let the debate begin!
370
00:15:17,291 --> 00:15:18,584
First question:
371
00:15:18,793 --> 00:15:20,962
What's your position on axes?
372
00:15:21,170 --> 00:15:23,506
Wait. I mean...taxes.
373
00:15:23,714 --> 00:15:25,299
Easy. Taxes are the worst.
374
00:15:25,508 --> 00:15:27,260
I propose we stimulate
the economy
375
00:15:27,468 --> 00:15:30,012
by waging wars
on neighboring cities.
376
00:15:30,221 --> 00:15:31,889
We have the cannons.
377
00:15:32,098 --> 00:15:34,225
ALL: Boo!
378
00:15:34,434 --> 00:15:35,893
What? Uh...
379
00:15:36,102 --> 00:15:37,770
I don't know much about taxes,
380
00:15:37,979 --> 00:15:40,398
but I can promise you
a kitten in every pot.
381
00:15:40,606 --> 00:15:41,858
That doesn't make sense, Mabel.
382
00:15:42,066 --> 00:15:44,861
You don't make sense, Dipper!
383
00:15:45,069 --> 00:15:48,573
Fwends. Fwends. Can't you see
what's happening on this stage?
384
00:15:48,781 --> 00:15:51,367
These politicians
are dancing around the issues.
385
00:15:51,576 --> 00:15:55,997
Well, I can sing
round the issues!
386
00:15:56,205 --> 00:15:58,958
Crime is bad,
crime is so, so bad I
387
00:15:59,167 --> 00:16:00,960
Vote for Bud and it ain't
gonna be no crime
388
00:16:01,169 --> 00:16:02,962
J" Crime's bad.
Vote for Bud I
389
00:16:04,630 --> 00:16:06,716
You may now
throw your birdseed.
390
00:16:09,135 --> 00:16:11,387
And now
a quick intermission.
391
00:16:11,596 --> 00:16:12,972
We're getting
eaten alive back there.
392
00:16:13,181 --> 00:16:16,184
Since when has Bud
been creepily adorable?
393
00:16:16,392 --> 00:16:18,978
I don't know!
It doesn't make sense!
394
00:16:19,187 --> 00:16:21,939
He's almost acting
just like...like...
395
00:16:22,148 --> 00:16:24,317
GIDEON: Widdle old me.
396
00:16:26,235 --> 00:16:29,071
Aha! Hello there!
Long time no see.
397
00:16:29,280 --> 00:16:30,698
Except in my revenge fantasies
398
00:16:30,907 --> 00:16:32,575
where I see you
on an hourly basis.
399
00:16:32,783 --> 00:16:35,244
Gideon! I knew you were
somehow behind this!
400
00:16:35,453 --> 00:16:36,787
You've been controlling Bud!
401
00:16:36,996 --> 00:16:39,165
And it seems you've
been controlling Stanford!
402
00:16:39,373 --> 00:16:40,875
I have to hand it
to both y'all.
403
00:16:41,042 --> 00:16:43,586
You've gotten much eviler
since I last saw ya.
404
00:16:43,794 --> 00:16:44,837
Daddy.
405
00:16:45,046 --> 00:16:46,589
( Bud making zombie noises )
406
00:16:46,797 --> 00:16:47,757
(whimpering )
407
00:16:47,965 --> 00:16:49,967
MABEL: Let go of us!
408
00:16:55,806 --> 00:16:58,935
Behold your grand view
of the debate!
409
00:16:59,143 --> 00:17:00,645
Once I win this election,
410
00:17:00,853 --> 00:17:03,397
I'll finally rule
this backwoods town!
411
00:17:03,606 --> 00:17:06,442
You'll never get away with this,
you creepy little dork!
412
00:17:06,651 --> 00:17:10,238
Oh, I'd be happy to spare you,
Mabel--if you agree to be mine.
413
00:17:10,404 --> 00:17:13,074
I even made you this wedding
dress in crafts class.
414
00:17:13,241 --> 00:17:14,992
Don't ask what it's made of.
415
00:17:15,159 --> 00:17:17,203
Ew! I'd rather die,
you creep!
416
00:17:17,411 --> 00:17:20,540
Fine! Have it your way.
Once I win,
417
00:17:20,748 --> 00:17:22,625
they'll hit the plunger
for the fireworks display,
418
00:17:22,833 --> 00:17:24,418
finishing the mountain's
construction,
419
00:17:24,627 --> 00:17:26,212
trapping you all inside.
420
00:17:26,420 --> 00:17:28,256
I've been trapped
behind concrete all summer--
421
00:17:28,464 --> 00:17:30,550
now see how you like it!
422
00:17:30,758 --> 00:17:33,970
Say hello to the next
mayor of Gravity Falls, kids!
423
00:17:34,178 --> 00:17:36,556
( Evil laughter)
424
00:17:36,722 --> 00:17:38,182
And that is why, um,
425
00:17:38,391 --> 00:17:40,810
the Statue of Liberty
is our hottest landmark.
426
00:17:41,018 --> 00:17:42,228
ALL: BOO!!!!
427
00:17:42,436 --> 00:17:44,397
Awright, I lied.
She's kind of mannish.
428
00:17:44,605 --> 00:17:45,773
What do you want from me?
429
00:17:45,982 --> 00:17:48,985
( Audience cheering )
430
00:17:49,193 --> 00:17:52,446
Ahh. You're dying out there,
Stan.
431
00:17:53,698 --> 00:17:55,741
Kids, you were right
all along.
432
00:17:55,950 --> 00:17:57,827
I shoulda listened to you
when I had the chance.
433
00:17:58,035 --> 00:18:00,162
MABEL: Help! Help us!
What the--?!
434
00:18:00,371 --> 00:18:02,248
DIPPER: We're tied to
a bunch of fireworks!
435
00:18:04,917 --> 00:18:06,460
( Both scream )
436
00:18:07,878 --> 00:18:08,754
( screaming )
437
00:18:08,921 --> 00:18:10,298
( all gasp )
438
00:18:10,506 --> 00:18:11,465
Kids!
439
00:18:12,842 --> 00:18:13,926
Aah!
Aaah!
440
00:18:14,135 --> 00:18:15,678
Listen, everybody,
441
00:18:15,845 --> 00:18:16,929
this debate is over.
442
00:18:17,138 --> 00:18:18,639
I gotta go save my family!
443
00:18:18,848 --> 00:18:21,350
No, those--those are just
some demolition dummies.
444
00:18:21,559 --> 00:18:22,476
Nothin' to see here.
445
00:18:22,643 --> 00:18:24,645
Can it, Gleeful!
446
00:18:24,854 --> 00:18:26,147
Heeyahhh!
447
00:18:26,355 --> 00:18:28,149
ANNOUNCER:
In a shocking turn of events,
448
00:18:28,357 --> 00:18:30,818
Stan Pines has run to
the aid of two children
449
00:18:31,027 --> 00:18:33,112
who appear to be in danger.
450
00:18:33,279 --> 00:18:35,489
And the crowd is loving it!
451
00:18:35,698 --> 00:18:38,492
No! Stop it!
Thank you, but stop it!
452
00:18:38,701 --> 00:18:40,786
Get back,
you terror birds!
453
00:18:43,497 --> 00:18:44,874
Heeyahh!
454
00:18:51,422 --> 00:18:53,132
BOTH: Grunkle Stan!
455
00:18:53,341 --> 00:18:56,260
Kids! Look, I'm sorry
I was being stubborn.
456
00:18:56,469 --> 00:19:00,014
I guess being the town's hero wasn't
enough-- I wanted to be yours, too.
457
00:19:00,222 --> 00:19:03,517
We're sorry, Grunkle Stan. We should
have supported you, win or lose.
458
00:19:03,726 --> 00:19:05,227
Probably lose.
459
00:19:05,436 --> 00:19:07,146
I can still drop you, you know.
460
00:19:09,565 --> 00:19:12,151
( Crowd cheering )
461
00:19:14,195 --> 00:19:17,948
No, no, no, no, no,
no, no, no, not again!
462
00:19:18,157 --> 00:19:20,701
Time to take care of you
once and for all!
463
00:19:20,910 --> 00:19:22,787
Oh no! We have to
get out of here!
464
00:19:22,995 --> 00:19:24,580
Kids, if I die,
465
00:19:24,789 --> 00:19:27,291
make sure I get
a bigger tombstone than Ford.
466
00:19:32,880 --> 00:19:34,256
( Screaming )
467
00:19:37,510 --> 00:19:39,261
( screaming )
468
00:19:41,514 --> 00:19:43,224
NO! NO!
469
00:19:44,517 --> 00:19:45,810
Aaaaaah!
470
00:19:46,018 --> 00:19:47,645
( Buzzer sounds )
471
00:19:48,729 --> 00:19:50,773
( squawking )
472
00:19:50,981 --> 00:19:52,650
( all gasp )
473
00:20:05,496 --> 00:20:10,501
CHANTING: Mayor Pines!
Mayor Pines! Mayor Pines!
474
00:20:10,710 --> 00:20:13,087
Well, I guess
we know who won.
475
00:20:13,295 --> 00:20:14,505
ANNOUNCER: This just in:
476
00:20:14,714 --> 00:20:16,966
Stanford Pines loses.
477
00:20:17,174 --> 00:20:17,925
ALL: What?!
478
00:20:18,134 --> 00:20:20,720
Despite winning an overwhelming
95% of the vote,
479
00:20:20,928 --> 00:20:22,888
election officials
had to disqualify him
480
00:20:23,097 --> 00:20:25,391
clue to discovery of
an extensive criminal record.
481
00:20:25,599 --> 00:20:26,559
Oh boy.
482
00:20:26,767 --> 00:20:28,144
Stan, what did you do?
483
00:20:28,352 --> 00:20:29,770
What didn't I do?
484
00:20:29,979 --> 00:20:31,147
Crimes include shoplifting,
485
00:20:31,355 --> 00:20:32,732
teaching bears to drive,
486
00:20:32,940 --> 00:20:36,026
a new crime he invented
called "burgle-bezzlement,"
487
00:20:36,235 --> 00:20:37,903
first-degree llamacide...
488
00:20:38,112 --> 00:20:39,905
That llama knew too much.
489
00:20:40,114 --> 00:20:41,282
Due to this shocking
development,
490
00:20:41,490 --> 00:20:43,492
it would appear the mayorship
passes to
491
00:20:43,701 --> 00:20:46,203
the only candidate who actually
filled out their paperwork,
492
00:20:46,412 --> 00:20:49,749
local enthusiasm enthusiast
Tyler Cutebiker.
493
00:20:53,127 --> 00:20:54,754
Got it.
494
00:20:54,920 --> 00:20:56,505
We will dedicate
the rest of this broadcast
495
00:20:56,714 --> 00:20:58,549
to listing Stan's crimes.
496
00:20:58,758 --> 00:21:02,094
First-degree thermometer theft,
pug trafficking--
497
00:21:02,303 --> 00:21:04,388
Whoo! At least they didn't
list any of the bad ones.
498
00:21:04,597 --> 00:21:06,891
On an unrelated topic,
I have a lot of cheap pugs,
499
00:21:07,099 --> 00:21:08,601
and I need to move them fast.
500
00:21:08,809 --> 00:21:10,186
I'm sorry, Stan.
501
00:21:10,394 --> 00:21:12,605
I actually think you as mayor
would have been fun.
502
00:21:12,813 --> 00:21:14,190
Maybe it's for the best.
503
00:21:14,398 --> 00:21:16,025
I got close the dream,
though, kids.
504
00:21:16,233 --> 00:21:17,860
Hey, I knit you something.
505
00:21:18,068 --> 00:21:20,529
It's not official,
but I think it fits.
506
00:21:22,406 --> 00:21:23,824
( Sniffles )
507
00:21:24,033 --> 00:21:25,576
Grunkle Stan,
are you crying?
508
00:21:25,785 --> 00:21:27,912
I got campaign confetti
in my eyes.
509
00:21:28,078 --> 00:21:30,873
Come on, kids, want to go
vandalize Mayor Tyler's mansion?
510
00:21:31,040 --> 00:21:33,709
Hey hey! Vandalism!
Yay!!!
511
00:21:33,918 --> 00:21:37,463
I'm sorry the election thing
didn't work out for you, bro.
512
00:21:37,671 --> 00:21:38,839
If it makes you feel any better,
513
00:21:39,048 --> 00:21:40,674
we're gonna throw
a riot tonight.
514
00:21:40,841 --> 00:21:43,260
Does someone
want to throw a riot?
515
00:21:43,469 --> 00:21:45,930
Thanks, Ghost Eyes,
I'm just not in the mood.
516
00:21:47,973 --> 00:21:51,143
This poster is the only thing
keeping me going.
517
00:21:56,816 --> 00:21:59,151
I'm finally ready
to make a deal.
518
00:21:59,201 --> 00:22:03,751
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