Original subtitles

It feels like the slime is after me, personally.

That's all I'm saying.

This might be a crazy hunch,

but I think he's got that machine up and running again.

Come on.

Damn, I missed.

Oh, Kevin!

Oh. Is that what this thing's name is?

Thought it'd be something more Australian like "Jack-O" or "Dave-O" or "Rob-O."

Oh, I see there's five of you now.

Huh?

Who are you?

Oh, I'm Frank.

I just came down to get some ice.

Get out of here!

Get out of here!

I think we should've gave him a heads up about what was going on out there, y'all.

Well, it's been a very long day. Why don't you take a seat?

Please, sit.

Don't mind if I do.

Whoop!

Ah!

Okay.

I do appreciate the joke. It's a classic.

Oh, for fun.

I know you're getting real comfy in your Kevin skin suit,

but it's time you hop out.

We like him, despite his many, many frustrating quirks.

- He just started figuring out the phones! - Yeah.

Mmm... I don't know.

Is this a little too Peter Pan?

Anyway, I'll embrace it.

You know, to be honest with you,

this guy's making me feel stupider by the second.

He's all yours.

- No! - No, no, no!

Don't let Rowan get away!

I got his ass! Here I am.

Nobody hurts Kevin, man! Nobody hurts Kevin!

Come out, come out wherever you are

Over here.

Those guns come with instructions?

Come on, Rowan! Come get your virginity out of the lost-and-found!

- You shoot like girls. - 12 o'clock!

I think you broke it.

Look what you made me do!

It's ridiculous. Let's get Kevin.

I knew he was dumb as a box of rocks.

I didn't know he's as heavy as one. What's he made out of?

Pure muscle. Oh, and baby-soft skin.

Come on, Rowan, show yourself!

What form would you prefer I take?

Uh, maybe something stationary. Like a bull's-eye.

Well, I'll tell you what I prefer.

I prefer something nice and cute, like a friendly little ghost.

Oh. Is this what you want?

Something more familiar?

Mmm, Ice cream. Mmm.

Well, you know what, I don't have no problem with that.

Thank you very much for being reasonable.

If this is what you want, it works for me.

Oh, God, he's really going for it.

Man, I said cute. Cute!

Oh, God.

No. No, no, no.

No.

Okay, this is not good.

Whoa!

Run! Run!

Come on!

Erin!

Okay. Homeboy is pretty much not keeping up with what we agreed upon.

What part of "small and friendly" did he not understand?

Oh!

What do we do now?

We gotta go back there. We've got to shoot directly in the portal with more power.

If we can do that, we might be able to cause a reverse reaction.

We gotta cross the streams.

Wait, wait, wait. You mean that thing you were talking about that's so powerful

that will make all of our atoms implode?

No, implode is the wrong word. It'll be more violent than that.

We gotta cross 'em up, and we've got an extremely good shot

at pulling all the ionized ecto-matter back into the dimension of its origin.

So, on the plus side, we save the world.

And on the negative side, we experience the most painful death conceivable of all time.

Yeah. It's hard to shine that penny, but yeah.

Okay.

Let's do it.

Attagirl. Okay, let's go. Go, go, go.

Oh!

All right, fire 'em up.

Ahh!

The portal's too strong.

We still don't have enough power to reverse it.

Yo, what about that nuclear thing on top of the car?

If we can get those reactors super-critical inside the vortex,

the beta radiation could 180 the polarity.

Causing a total protonic reversal.

It's gonna turn that portal into a giant ghost trap.

You are a genius, Patty.

I'm a Ghostbuster.

All right, let's narrow his path.

Aim for the silver canisters.

It's working!

He's too strong.

We can't let the portal close with him still here.

All right, ladies.

Let's loosen his grip.

Yo, that's where you wanted us to shoot, right?

Yes.

Look out!

Abby!

The portal's closing!

- Abby, hang on! I'm coming! - What is she doing?

Hang on, Abby!

Abby!

Erin.

I wasn't gonna leave you twice.

Yeah.

Mmm-hmm.

- Oh! - Hold on!

- Oh, my God. - We got to get 'em out of there.

We got to get 'em out of there!

Shut up!

Yeah!

Hell yeah!

Yeah! Yeah!

Oh, my God! Oh, my God.

Oh, my God!

- Whoa. - Yeah! Yeah!

- What's "whoa"? - Yes.

- Oh! - No!

Oh, my...

Oh, my gosh.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God!

Oh, my gosh! Uh...

What year is it?

- It's 2040. - What?

- Our president is a plant. - Oh, my God!

I'm kidding. You were gone two seconds.

- We did it, huh? - Yeah.

- Yeah, you did it. - Yep.

- We all did it. - We all did it.

- We all did it. - That's right.

- We all did it. - Well, uh...

What did you do, Kevin?

I did a lot, actually.

I'll have you know that I walked over to the power box,

pushed a bunch of buttons.

Everything got sucked into the portal, then it closed up.

- Ah, Kev. - That's...

Sweet, sweet Kev. The two are unrelated.

Uh, more important question. When did you have time to get a sandwich?

Oh, when I was looking for you guys, I looked in that deli over there.

Uh... When we were risking our lives, trying to save New York City,

you stopped in to get a sandwich?

Quit splitting hairs, okay?

Potatoes, tomatoes. It doesn't matter.

Point is, the Ghostbusters...

Are back together again, okay?

And that's what friends are for.

- Just glad you okay, man. - Kevin!

Yes. Hold my hand longer.

Okay. Okay. Okay.

I love the hair, by the way. Makes you look a lot older.

- You know what? - Hmm?

A little help, please?

Uh...

Really?

Can I have the beverage, please?

Don't.

Mmm.

And a muffin, thanks.

Oh, my God.

Are you a wizard?

In the aftermath of the events,

authorities are still trying to understand

what happened in Times Square and throughout the city.

I saw Pilgrims. Ghost Pilgrims.

So you're honestly gonna stand here and tell me that we didn't all see ghosts,

that what actually happened

was that terrorists drugged all of the water with hallucinogens.

Yes. Yes.

Wait, what?

- Baba Booey! - I... I...

...with the government trying to claim the event wasn't supernatural,

despite so many eyewitness accounts to the contrary.

The big question is,

was it the four women who refer to themselves as Ghostbusters

who actually thwarted the attack?

We may never know.

Well, now I know how Batman feels.

You know what? You don't have to keep fiddling with it.

I think it looks nice. Right?

I'd talk to you at an AA meeting.

It's my fault, anyway.

The box said the color was called Garfield.

- Ooh. - Mmm.

It wasn't even the cat. It was the president.

Oh.

It was part of the Dead Presidents Color Collection.

You stay away from Taft.

That's my mother's color. I don't want to see that on anyone's head.

Mine was "Woman with a Secret."

And she was kind of going, "Shh."

And she appeared to be in a canoe.

You know what? I want to make a toast.

Oh.

Uh-oh.

- Here we go. - Here we go.

Physics is the study of the movement of, uh, bodies in space,

and it can unlock the mysteries of the universe.

But it cannot answer the essential question of what is our purpose here.

And, to me, the purpose of life is to love.

And to love is what you have shown me.

I didn't think that I would ever really have a friend until I met Abby,

and then I feel like I have a family of my own.

And I love you. Thank you.

Thank you.

I mean, that was like a real thing right there.

- Yeah, that was... - That was, like, so real.

I'm so sorry I'm late.

Oh.

We want to thank you for your discretion.

It's not working at all, but thank you.

Actually, we'd like you to continue to study this subject,

fully funded.

You know, we need to be better prepared, just in case.

- Yeah. Yes, that's smart. - Yes.

Whatever you need, going forward.

Anything at all.

Anything?

Anything.

Hell yeah!

Second floor is mine.

You can't claim a whole floor.

- I just did. - You can't...

You can't do that, Holtzy!

Not bad, ghost girl.

Thank you, and I proudly take that title.

- Is that... - Patty's uncle.

Unc!

Where is it?

What are you talking about? I told you what happened.

Where's the car?

- It's on the other side. - In Jersey?

- No, in the portal. - Ah, huh...

You know what? We should probably let them just work this out.

- Excuse me. - Patty,

I got four funerals this weekend.

I can't do them with just one hearse.

Maybe you could do two at a time.

We're not stacking 'em like flapjacks!

- Here you go. - Thank you.

I know what you did.

What? Oh...

Bennie, don't get weird on me, okay?

What is...

Yeah!

I'm just looking for a reasonable ratio of wontons to broth.

This is absolute madness.

Come on, girl. You deserve every wonton in the world.

Don't let any man tell you otherwise.

- Okay, you can go. - All right.

- We still good for brunch? - Nope.

Just go.

Ghostbusters. Please give a detailed description of your apparition.

Mmm-hmm. Well, that sounds like

an illusional meta-physious, spectro-mian.

Mmm. Mmm-hmm.

I'm talking like you guys.

- Way to go, Kev. - Yeah.

Well, that sounds very scary.

It's probably 'cause you got a lot of bad karma from your previous life. Mmm.

Oh, I hate coffee.

I'm just gonna disconnect his phone.

- He won't notice. - No.

How's it going over here?

Um, good. Really good.

I'm working on some kind of next-level stuff.

Case in point.

Whoa!

Wow.

What is this for?

It catches ghosts and it transports them somewhere else.

I don't know where, uh,

but I have a feeling it's Michigan.

Sorry, Lansing.

Hey, how's this containment unit?

Oh, you got that up and going?

Oh, that? Oh, that's going real smooth.

Uh, I just would say don't be in a room with it for more than an hour at a time,

because I'm thinking a lot of hair loss.

Oh, well, that might be something we want to work on. Oh.

Uh, hi. Hello. Sorry, I didn't know anyone else was here.

What a ding-a-ling. I forgot to introduce.

This is my mentor, Dr. Rebecca Gorin.

This is reckless, Jillian.

All someone has to do is sneeze too hard

and everyone in this building is going to disintegrate.

It's completely unstable.

Do we need this safety light?

Safety lights are for dudes.

I hate doing that.

Hey, y'all need to come check this out. Come up to the roof.

Is that for us?

I guess some people actually do know what we did.

Well, that's not terrible.

No, it's not.

It's not terrible at all.