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1
00:00:03,336 --> 00:00:04,631
Surprise!
2
00:00:05,538 --> 00:00:06,926
What is that?
3
00:00:07,032 --> 00:00:08,772
It's freedom. Now that we're buying
4
00:00:08,841 --> 00:00:10,207
Kenny Rogers' half of the restaurant,
5
00:00:10,243 --> 00:00:11,860
we can do whatever the heck we want.
6
00:00:11,911 --> 00:00:14,044
Also, we're switching back
to one-ply in the bathrooms.
7
00:00:14,146 --> 00:00:15,446
Mm, I don't know...
8
00:00:15,481 --> 00:00:18,578
We'll keep a roll of two-ply
in the register for me and you.
9
00:00:18,710 --> 00:00:19,783
No, not the toilet paper.
10
00:00:19,852 --> 00:00:22,760
I don't know about buying back
Kenny's share of the restaurant.
11
00:00:23,380 --> 00:00:24,277
What do you mean?
12
00:00:24,556 --> 00:00:25,855
I thought we talked about this.
13
00:00:25,924 --> 00:00:27,056
I thought you went down to the notary
14
00:00:27,158 --> 00:00:28,391
and got the papers signed.
15
00:00:28,460 --> 00:00:30,860
I was going to,
and then I hit that long light on 5th
16
00:00:30,929 --> 00:00:32,195
and I started debating,
17
00:00:32,264 --> 00:00:33,696
do we want to spend that
kind of money right now?
18
00:00:33,732 --> 00:00:35,798
Maybe we should find another
partner to buy Kenny's half.
19
00:00:35,834 --> 00:00:36,766
Share the risk.
20
00:00:36,835 --> 00:00:38,134
Share the profits, you mean.
21
00:00:38,203 --> 00:00:40,903
Kenny's giving us his half
for pennies on the dollar.
22
00:00:40,972 --> 00:00:42,453
It's a great deal.
23
00:00:42,571 --> 00:00:43,973
Hmm. You're right.
24
00:00:44,009 --> 00:00:46,186
- Mm-hmm.
- I'll add that to the pro column.
25
00:00:47,545 --> 00:00:50,612
Pro... I own the whole restaurant.
26
00:00:50,681 --> 00:00:54,750
Con... I own the whole restaurant.
27
00:00:55,510 --> 00:00:57,186
You just wrote the
same thing down twice.
28
00:00:57,254 --> 00:01:00,055
Tricky, isn't it,
how the same thing can be good or bad?
29
00:01:00,124 --> 00:01:01,423
This hasn't been very helpful.
30
00:01:01,492 --> 00:01:03,559
Louis, you always do this.
31
00:01:03,627 --> 00:01:04,960
You question and over-analyze
32
00:01:05,029 --> 00:01:07,029
and then you miss out
on a great opportunity
33
00:01:07,131 --> 00:01:08,497
because you can't make up your mind.
34
00:01:08,566 --> 00:01:10,165
Well, I like to measure twice, cut once.
35
00:01:10,267 --> 00:01:11,233
Nothing's wrong with that.
36
00:01:11,335 --> 00:01:14,636
No. Dumb. Me, I'm a woman of action.
37
00:01:14,738 --> 00:01:16,805
You have to act first
and then apologize later.
38
00:01:16,907 --> 00:01:18,359
Like I have learned to do.
39
00:01:18,408 --> 00:01:19,741
You never apologize.
40
00:01:19,843 --> 00:01:21,877
I would if I had ever been wrong.
41
00:01:21,945 --> 00:01:23,778
Listen, Louis, I know for a fact
42
00:01:23,847 --> 00:01:25,480
that we should buy back the restaurant.
43
00:01:25,549 --> 00:01:27,150
How can you be so sure?
44
00:01:27,217 --> 00:01:28,950
Madame Xing foretold it.
45
00:01:29,052 --> 00:01:30,318
Your psychic?
46
00:01:30,420 --> 00:01:32,020
She's never steered me wrong.
47
00:01:32,088 --> 00:01:36,024
Hey, a lobster tank! Fun!
48
00:01:36,126 --> 00:01:38,660
Lobsters all piled on top of each other.
49
00:01:39,192 --> 00:01:41,229
It's sad, actually.
50
00:01:41,963 --> 00:01:44,113
I'm gonna go lie down.
51
00:01:44,668 --> 00:01:45,867
[TANK BUBBLING]
52
00:01:45,969 --> 00:01:48,269
S04E18
Measure Twice, Cut Once
53
00:01:48,371 --> 00:01:49,437
? Fresh off the boat ?
54
00:01:49,539 --> 00:01:51,139
? I'm gettin' mine everywhere I go ?
55
00:01:51,241 --> 00:01:53,441
? If you don't know,
homey, now you know ?
56
00:01:53,543 --> 00:01:54,709
? Fresh off the boat ?
57
00:01:54,811 --> 00:01:57,045
? Homey,
you don't know where I come from ?
58
00:01:57,147 --> 00:01:58,513
? But I know where I'm goin' ?
59
00:01:58,615 --> 00:02:00,086
? I'm fresh off the boat ?
60
00:02:00,181 --> 00:02:01,722
sync and corrected by ninh
www.addic7ed.com
61
00:02:01,818 --> 00:02:03,984
We've got to agree on something.
62
00:02:04,087 --> 00:02:05,494
What about "Tommy Boy"?
63
00:02:05,653 --> 00:02:06,402
_
64
00:02:06,455 --> 00:02:09,188
_
65
00:02:09,273 --> 00:02:11,932
_
66
00:02:12,028 --> 00:02:13,188
Please.
67
00:02:13,336 --> 00:02:15,096
"Multiplicity."
68
00:02:15,198 --> 00:02:16,564
[ALL GROAN]
69
00:02:16,666 --> 00:02:18,099
Eddie, whatever you do,
70
00:02:18,201 --> 00:02:19,500
don't turn it to
"Regis and Kathie Lee"...
71
00:02:19,602 --> 00:02:20,601
Don't worry.
72
00:02:20,703 --> 00:02:22,269
Which I gave up for 40 days of Lent
73
00:02:22,372 --> 00:02:23,671
to replicate the sacrifice
74
00:02:23,773 --> 00:02:26,140
of Jesus' 40-day trip into the desert.
75
00:02:26,242 --> 00:02:28,075
Here we go. Bible Boy is back.
76
00:02:28,177 --> 00:02:30,010
My least favorite time of the year.
77
00:02:30,113 --> 00:02:33,814
I forgive you, brothers.
Love the sinners, hate the sin.
78
00:02:33,883 --> 00:02:35,649
Louis, I just talked to Madame Xing
79
00:02:35,752 --> 00:02:38,386
and she told me another
reason why we should buy back
80
00:02:38,488 --> 00:02:40,287
Kenny Rogers' half of the restaurant...
81
00:02:40,672 --> 00:02:43,924
I faced the exact same
dilemma in a past life.
82
00:02:44,799 --> 00:02:47,695
Could we not bring
reincarnation into this, please?
83
00:02:47,797 --> 00:02:51,565
Xing says I was a cartographer
in the Northwest Passage
84
00:02:51,667 --> 00:02:53,567
after the Louisiana Purchase.
85
00:02:53,669 --> 00:02:56,604
I could have bought some
pelts from a local tribe,
86
00:02:56,706 --> 00:02:59,940
but I hesitated and I froze to death.
87
00:03:00,307 --> 00:03:01,842
Don't make the same mistake I did.
88
00:03:01,944 --> 00:03:04,011
Yeah, but what does any of this
have to do with the restaurant?
89
00:03:04,113 --> 00:03:05,446
Oh, I think it's pretty clear.
90
00:03:05,548 --> 00:03:07,548
The restaurant is our pelts.
91
00:03:07,650 --> 00:03:08,983
You need to stop hesitating
92
00:03:09,085 --> 00:03:11,652
and buy it back so we don't
get iced out of a great deal.
93
00:03:11,754 --> 00:03:12,566
[TEETH GRINDING]
94
00:03:12,640 --> 00:03:13,896
_
95
00:03:14,044 --> 00:03:15,743
_
96
00:03:15,859 --> 00:03:18,276
_
97
00:03:18,461 --> 00:03:20,928
We are not making any big
decisions in our current life
98
00:03:21,030 --> 00:03:23,964
based on something Xing
said you did in a past life.
99
00:03:24,066 --> 00:03:26,400
[SCOFFS] I can't wait
till I'm reincarnated.
100
00:03:26,502 --> 00:03:28,002
I know who I'm coming back as.
101
00:03:28,104 --> 00:03:29,069
The RZA.
102
00:03:29,172 --> 00:03:30,571
? Yeah ?
103
00:03:30,673 --> 00:03:32,106
[CRUNCH]
104
00:03:32,175 --> 00:03:35,142
Damn, Dave, these are the
best ants-on-a-log I ever had.
105
00:03:35,244 --> 00:03:36,310
Thanks, Eddie RZA.
106
00:03:36,412 --> 00:03:37,478
Come on, Brian. What's up, man?
107
00:03:37,580 --> 00:03:39,180
You're acting like Antarctica over here.
108
00:03:39,282 --> 00:03:41,048
Get your ass in the pool. It's heated.
109
00:03:41,150 --> 00:03:42,750
Chlorine makes my skin itch.
110
00:03:43,792 --> 00:03:44,919
[SCOFFS] Hey, yo, Ho-Ho!
111
00:03:45,922 --> 00:03:49,089
Drain the pool and fill
it up with meatballs.
112
00:03:49,192 --> 00:03:50,391
The saucy ones.
113
00:03:50,493 --> 00:03:52,092
Hell, yeah, Eddie RZA.
114
00:03:52,195 --> 00:03:53,294
That's what I'm talkin' about.
115
00:03:54,293 --> 00:03:56,430
That's not how reincarnation works.
116
00:03:56,499 --> 00:03:59,200
I studied all the religions
before enrolling into Jesus U.
117
00:03:59,302 --> 00:04:01,001
[QUIETLY] Here comes the seminar.
118
00:04:01,103 --> 00:04:02,236
Every time we die,
119
00:04:02,338 --> 00:04:04,305
our consciousness is
reborn into another form.
120
00:04:04,373 --> 00:04:06,607
Each life is an opportunity
to improve ourselves.
121
00:04:06,709 --> 00:04:08,843
If you do, your spirit transcends higher
122
00:04:08,945 --> 00:04:10,678
until you reach spiritual liberation.
123
00:04:10,780 --> 00:04:13,914
And I have improved
through all my lives.
124
00:04:14,016 --> 00:04:17,017
That's how I became the perfect
being you see before you.
125
00:04:17,119 --> 00:04:18,452
[SNICKERS] That's bold.
126
00:04:18,554 --> 00:04:19,653
I know.
127
00:04:19,755 --> 00:04:21,722
In my next life, I plan on achieving
128
00:04:21,824 --> 00:04:24,158
my ultimate spiritual form...
129
00:04:24,950 --> 00:04:26,026
Morning mist.
130
00:04:26,840 --> 00:04:30,598
That's why I know we should
buy back the restaurant.
131
00:04:30,700 --> 00:04:32,366
I learned it three lives ago
132
00:04:32,468 --> 00:04:34,635
when I should have bought
those beaver skins.
133
00:04:34,737 --> 00:04:36,437
All right, listen, I agree with you.
134
00:04:36,539 --> 00:04:37,705
We should buy back the restaurant.
135
00:04:37,807 --> 00:04:38,667
Yes!
136
00:04:38,719 --> 00:04:40,875
It takes you a while, Louis,
but you finally get there.
137
00:04:40,977 --> 00:04:43,577
But not because of any
vision Madame Xing had.
138
00:04:43,679 --> 00:04:45,913
Because I called Silvia at Union Savings
139
00:04:45,982 --> 00:04:47,214
and had her run the numbers.
140
00:04:47,316 --> 00:04:48,415
They're too good to pass up.
141
00:04:48,518 --> 00:04:49,783
It doesn't make sense not to buy it.
142
00:04:49,886 --> 00:04:52,187
So Silvia is your Madame Xing.
143
00:04:52,335 --> 00:04:54,355
No, Silvia is a professional
144
00:04:54,423 --> 00:04:56,357
working in an accredited industry.
145
00:04:56,459 --> 00:05:00,094
She uses math. She has a CPA.
She graduated from FSU.
146
00:05:00,393 --> 00:05:01,729
Okay, Louis.
147
00:05:01,831 --> 00:05:02,630
Okay.
148
00:05:05,849 --> 00:05:08,702
Okay,
I need you to sign and initial these,
149
00:05:08,994 --> 00:05:11,854
roll your thumb through some ink,
and we'll be done.
150
00:05:11,949 --> 00:05:14,883
Very unhygienic.
That's why I brought my own ink.
151
00:05:16,285 --> 00:05:18,846
We don't know if some
pedophile co-signed for a van.
152
00:05:20,633 --> 00:05:22,227
Lorenzo, what do you think I should do?
153
00:05:22,417 --> 00:05:23,652
- Me?
- Him?
154
00:05:23,768 --> 00:05:24,929
Yes, what's your opinion on this?
155
00:05:24,987 --> 00:05:26,646
Should I buy the other
half of the restaurant?
156
00:05:26,722 --> 00:05:28,054
Well, who owns it now?
157
00:05:28,090 --> 00:05:30,357
Louis, we decided this already.
158
00:05:30,459 --> 00:05:32,225
Pee or get off the toilet.
159
00:05:33,316 --> 00:05:35,161
I sit 'cause I don't like
having my back to the door
160
00:05:35,264 --> 00:05:36,162
when I'm exposed.
161
00:05:36,265 --> 00:05:37,264
I won't tell.
162
00:05:37,332 --> 00:05:38,798
I'm just saying, this is a big decision.
163
00:05:38,900 --> 00:05:40,333
Maybe we should sleep on it.
164
00:05:40,402 --> 00:05:43,504
We just woke up from sleep!
It's morning!
165
00:05:43,767 --> 00:05:44,404
I'm sorry, but I'm holding off.
166
00:05:44,473 --> 00:05:46,628
- Ohh!
- No thumbs today, Lorenzo.
167
00:05:50,245 --> 00:05:52,144
What happened to all the lobsters?
168
00:05:52,213 --> 00:05:54,680
AMY: Matthew?
Aren't you supposed to be at work?
169
00:05:54,749 --> 00:05:55,748
It's my day off!
170
00:05:55,850 --> 00:05:57,016
I thought that was Thursday?
171
00:05:57,118 --> 00:05:58,484
- I'm sick!
- Watch it!
172
00:05:58,553 --> 00:06:00,353
As soon as Inspector
Gadget gets out of here,
173
00:06:00,455 --> 00:06:02,054
I'm gonna drive you
guys all to the Gulf.
174
00:06:02,824 --> 00:06:03,823
[CHUCKLES] Except you.
175
00:06:04,460 --> 00:06:05,758
You, I'm gonna keep.
176
00:06:08,830 --> 00:06:12,135
Evan, cover your eyes and ears.
We're gonna watch "Baywatch."
177
00:06:12,233 --> 00:06:14,934
Sorry, you can't.
I'm taping "Regis and Kathie Lee."
178
00:06:15,002 --> 00:06:17,836
I plan to catch up on all the
episodes I miss once Lent ends.
179
00:06:17,905 --> 00:06:19,271
Doesn't seem like much of a sacrifice
180
00:06:19,307 --> 00:06:21,006
if you're gonna watch
the episodes eventually.
181
00:06:21,108 --> 00:06:22,875
The shows will be irrelevant by then.
182
00:06:22,944 --> 00:06:24,476
That's the sacrifice.
183
00:06:24,579 --> 00:06:25,578
So now we have to suffer
184
00:06:25,613 --> 00:06:27,279
so you can feel like
you're superior to us?
185
00:06:27,348 --> 00:06:29,081
Not superior, just better.
186
00:06:30,117 --> 00:06:33,018
Ugh! I cannot take 40 days of this.
187
00:06:33,120 --> 00:06:34,587
Lent Evan is the worst.
188
00:06:34,689 --> 00:06:36,222
We need to take him down a peg.
189
00:06:36,324 --> 00:06:39,177
I don't know.
I think I'm done with all that stuff.
190
00:06:39,462 --> 00:06:40,410
I'm maturing.
191
00:06:40,494 --> 00:06:42,394
You farted into a
Ziploc bag this morning
192
00:06:42,463 --> 00:06:44,429
and put it in the freezer
to see if it would freeze.
193
00:06:44,498 --> 00:06:46,031
Oh, yeah, that's right.
194
00:06:46,133 --> 00:06:48,410
Yeah, cool, let's mess with Evan.
195
00:06:54,141 --> 00:06:55,340
Hey.
196
00:06:55,684 --> 00:06:58,343
Louis,
I understand you've had some trouble
197
00:06:58,445 --> 00:07:01,604
making a decision and
I've been pushing you.
198
00:07:05,352 --> 00:07:06,584
I know you're impulsive
199
00:07:06,687 --> 00:07:08,353
and I appreciate you
coming to apologize...
200
00:07:08,455 --> 00:07:11,189
Oh, no. Hey. No one is apologizing.
201
00:07:11,291 --> 00:07:13,959
What? How do... You aren't?
202
00:07:14,061 --> 00:07:17,362
No. I found someone else
to push you instead.
203
00:07:18,105 --> 00:07:20,490
I flew in Madame Xing from D.C.!
204
00:07:20,638 --> 00:07:23,468
She was 10 minutes late
picking me up at the airport.
205
00:07:23,570 --> 00:07:24,936
But I had a vision she would be.
206
00:07:25,038 --> 00:07:27,605
So, I had a quick cigar
outside the terminal.
207
00:07:27,708 --> 00:07:29,708
She'll give you a reading and tell you
208
00:07:29,776 --> 00:07:32,477
how many lives you've
spent trapped by indecision
209
00:07:32,579 --> 00:07:34,779
so you can finally
overcome your weakness.
210
00:07:37,117 --> 00:07:38,249
[TEETH GRIND]
211
00:07:40,878 --> 00:07:43,417
You paid to fly your psychic
in to give me a reading?
212
00:07:43,480 --> 00:07:45,813
Of course not.
I used our credit card points.
213
00:07:45,882 --> 00:07:47,348
I was gonna use those to take the family
214
00:07:47,417 --> 00:07:49,150
to either Alaska or Hawaii.
215
00:07:49,219 --> 00:07:50,651
You've been debating
that trip for years.
216
00:07:50,720 --> 00:07:52,086
If you had made a decision,
217
00:07:52,122 --> 00:07:55,471
then I wouldn't have the free
miles to fly her out here.
218
00:07:55,558 --> 00:07:56,623
Unbelievable!
219
00:07:56,692 --> 00:07:58,759
Louis, I'm just doing this to help you
220
00:07:58,828 --> 00:08:01,562
see that buying back the
restaurant is a good idea.
221
00:08:01,630 --> 00:08:03,831
Jessica, can I have some ice water?
222
00:08:03,899 --> 00:08:05,199
I have the cigar breath.
223
00:08:05,301 --> 00:08:07,134
Of course, Madame Xing.
224
00:08:10,648 --> 00:08:12,928
Don't open it.
One of Eddie's experiments.
225
00:08:14,426 --> 00:08:15,690
This is ridiculous.
226
00:08:15,753 --> 00:08:18,427
I'm not gonna put our future
in the hands of your psychic.
227
00:08:18,495 --> 00:08:19,995
She has a gift, Louis.
228
00:08:20,064 --> 00:08:22,097
Her guidance about my
book deal was dead on,
229
00:08:22,166 --> 00:08:23,665
she was right about
Honey having a boy...
230
00:08:23,734 --> 00:08:25,067
That's a 50-50 guess.
231
00:08:25,102 --> 00:08:27,069
And she said that your
restaurant would be successful
232
00:08:27,137 --> 00:08:28,303
when we first moved here.
233
00:08:28,372 --> 00:08:30,372
Well, how do I know, like her,
you're not making that up?
234
00:08:30,441 --> 00:08:33,308
[SIGHS] She also predicted
that you would be hesitant.
235
00:08:33,344 --> 00:08:35,510
That's why I bought her
an open-ended ticket.
236
00:08:35,584 --> 00:08:38,188
Yeah, she's not leaving until
you let her give you a reading.
237
00:08:39,508 --> 00:08:41,382
My first time to Florida.
238
00:08:41,451 --> 00:08:44,352
Gonna do SeaWorld,
Disney, swamp boat ride,
239
00:08:44,421 --> 00:08:46,254
maybe take a class at
the community college.
240
00:08:46,356 --> 00:08:47,422
Hmm.
241
00:08:47,524 --> 00:08:48,890
The longer you resist,
242
00:08:48,925 --> 00:08:51,094
the more fun she'll see in her future.
243
00:08:53,929 --> 00:08:55,129
What are you doing?
244
00:08:55,164 --> 00:08:57,131
We're throwing out our underwear
so we won't be tempted.
245
00:08:57,199 --> 00:08:58,499
Tempted? By what?
246
00:08:58,567 --> 00:09:00,868
After you left,
we turned on "Regis and Kathie Lee."
247
00:09:00,936 --> 00:09:02,403
Usually, we'd never watch that crap.
248
00:09:02,471 --> 00:09:04,371
[GASPS] But they did a
really powerful segment
249
00:09:04,473 --> 00:09:05,606
on the true meaning of Lent
250
00:09:05,674 --> 00:09:07,074
and it convinced us to give it a try.
251
00:09:07,176 --> 00:09:10,277
Regis and Kathie Lee are giving
up underwear for 40 days.
252
00:09:10,346 --> 00:09:11,412
So we're gonna try, too.
253
00:09:11,447 --> 00:09:13,580
Why on Earth would Regis
give up underwear?!
254
00:09:13,649 --> 00:09:14,782
Kathie Lee maybe.
255
00:09:14,884 --> 00:09:16,617
So they could be more like Jesus.
256
00:09:16,685 --> 00:09:18,281
Because he didn't wear underwear.
257
00:09:18,353 --> 00:09:20,187
Excuse me! Jesus wore underwear.
258
00:09:20,222 --> 00:09:21,822
Not according to them, he didn't.
259
00:09:21,857 --> 00:09:23,390
They said it was too hot in the desert.
260
00:09:23,980 --> 00:09:25,933
Plus, even if he did own a pair,
261
00:09:26,007 --> 00:09:28,149
you know he'd lend them
to the less fortunate.
262
00:09:28,339 --> 00:09:29,429
You guys are just messing with me.
263
00:09:29,531 --> 00:09:31,364
Oh, yeah?
How many times does it mention underwear
264
00:09:31,467 --> 00:09:33,093
in the Bible you're always reading?
265
00:09:34,771 --> 00:09:37,093
And you call yourself
a student of religion.
266
00:09:37,167 --> 00:09:40,072
If you don't believe us, watch the tape.
267
00:09:40,141 --> 00:09:42,775
A-ha!
You're trying to make me break Lent.
268
00:09:42,844 --> 00:09:45,077
I should've known.
You never even watched the show.
269
00:09:45,179 --> 00:09:46,078
Yes, we did.
270
00:09:46,147 --> 00:09:47,280
Oh, yeah, then who was the guest?
271
00:09:47,348 --> 00:09:48,514
Reba McEntire. Reba McEntire.
272
00:09:48,583 --> 00:09:50,049
Ugh, that sounds right.
273
00:09:50,118 --> 00:09:51,917
Come on,
let's go find a super-cool homeless kid
274
00:09:51,986 --> 00:09:53,419
who needs underwear.
275
00:09:58,054 --> 00:10:01,394
I'm trying to look back,
but there's a spirit in the way.
276
00:10:02,117 --> 00:10:03,762
You lost a family member?
277
00:10:03,831 --> 00:10:06,031
Yes, I've lost a relative. Everyone has.
278
00:10:06,133 --> 00:10:07,766
I haven't.
279
00:10:07,835 --> 00:10:10,168
Louis, I told you she has a gift.
280
00:10:10,237 --> 00:10:11,803
Stop fighting it.
281
00:10:11,872 --> 00:10:14,239
Something else is coming into focus.
282
00:10:15,068 --> 00:10:16,541
I see a past life.
283
00:10:16,662 --> 00:10:19,144
- Hmm.
- One where you are a turtle.
284
00:10:19,213 --> 00:10:20,812
- [SCOFFS]
- Yes, that sounds right.
285
00:10:20,881 --> 00:10:24,271
He makes decisions like a turtle...
Slow.
286
00:10:24,351 --> 00:10:25,583
Okay,
I don't see how anything you're seeing
287
00:10:25,685 --> 00:10:26,718
is supposed to help me.
288
00:10:26,786 --> 00:10:29,087
Madame Xing can't help what she sees.
289
00:10:29,155 --> 00:10:30,688
She's on a higher level.
290
00:10:30,931 --> 00:10:34,058
Yes. Now give me those nice hands.
291
00:10:34,127 --> 00:10:37,328
[TEETH GRIND]
292
00:10:39,328 --> 00:10:40,098
[CRACK] Ow!
293
00:10:40,200 --> 00:10:41,432
I think I broke my tooth!
294
00:10:41,501 --> 00:10:45,961
In dreams, a broken tooth
symbolizes a hidden frustration.
295
00:10:46,257 --> 00:10:48,175
Not hidden, lady!
296
00:10:48,277 --> 00:10:50,511
I'm going to Marvin,
see if he can fix this.
297
00:10:50,579 --> 00:10:52,680
Decisive action.
That's progress. [DOOR SLAMS]
298
00:10:54,450 --> 00:10:57,384
Oh, yeah, you cracked your enamel.
299
00:10:57,486 --> 00:10:58,986
You've been grinding your teeth.
300
00:10:59,121 --> 00:11:00,087
I'm a little stressed.
301
00:11:00,189 --> 00:11:01,455
Ah. Same.
302
00:11:01,903 --> 00:11:03,257
I'm meeting Honey for lunch.
303
00:11:03,926 --> 00:11:05,258
We've been having a major battle
304
00:11:05,327 --> 00:11:07,127
about whether to circumcise the baby.
305
00:11:07,229 --> 00:11:08,495
She doesn't want to?
306
00:11:08,563 --> 00:11:10,931
No, she says there's a lot
of sensation in that part.
307
00:11:10,966 --> 00:11:12,999
Nerve endings. How does she know?
308
00:11:13,101 --> 00:11:17,037
Anyway,
just lie back and enjoy the gas, Lou.
309
00:11:18,504 --> 00:11:19,706
[GAS HISSING] I fought in the Navy.
310
00:11:19,741 --> 00:11:22,309
I can't let it come out that
I didn't circumcise my boy.
311
00:11:22,377 --> 00:11:24,982
I go to reunions, it's gonna come up.
312
00:11:25,313 --> 00:11:27,480
You know,
there was a guy in our unit that, uh,
313
00:11:27,548 --> 00:11:29,648
well, he was, you know, natural.
314
00:11:29,751 --> 00:11:30,683
[EAGLE CRIES]
315
00:11:30,785 --> 00:11:32,952
MADAME XING: I see a past life.
316
00:11:33,436 --> 00:11:36,889
One where you are a turtle.
317
00:11:37,237 --> 00:11:39,664
LOUIS: Pro...
we get to the other side of the road.
318
00:11:39,801 --> 00:11:41,727
Con... we die.
319
00:11:42,946 --> 00:11:43,996
Maybe we should go for it.
320
00:11:44,065 --> 00:11:46,465
It's been two hours, and not one car.
321
00:11:47,280 --> 00:11:48,634
Although, it just increases the odds
322
00:11:48,703 --> 00:11:50,069
that one is about to come.
323
00:11:50,562 --> 00:11:52,137
It's too dangerous.
324
00:11:52,239 --> 00:11:54,072
Although...
325
00:11:54,107 --> 00:11:55,707
Hey, hey, hey, hey!
326
00:11:55,776 --> 00:11:56,875
Where are you going?
327
00:11:56,944 --> 00:11:58,143
What... What are you doing?
328
00:11:58,245 --> 00:11:59,144
Carl, don't just...
329
00:11:59,246 --> 00:12:00,445
[CRUNCH]
330
00:12:00,547 --> 00:12:01,580
[GASPS]
331
00:12:01,648 --> 00:12:04,616
Aaaaaaaah!
332
00:12:05,116 --> 00:12:06,484
And what's it gonna be
like when my son and I
333
00:12:06,553 --> 00:12:08,587
go to the sauna for the first time?
334
00:12:10,191 --> 00:12:10,822
[TOMMY LAUGHS]
335
00:12:11,268 --> 00:12:15,060
? Fat guy in a little coat ?
336
00:12:15,764 --> 00:12:16,991
What is this movie?
337
00:12:17,097 --> 00:12:18,896
I can't follow any of this.
338
00:12:19,833 --> 00:12:21,466
[MUFFLED] There might be some...
339
00:12:21,534 --> 00:12:24,202
There might be something to this
reincarnation stuff after all!
340
00:12:24,270 --> 00:12:25,737
Madame Xing said you'd come around.
341
00:12:25,805 --> 00:12:26,871
As always, it takes you a while,
342
00:12:26,973 --> 00:12:28,406
but eventually you see that I am right.
343
00:12:28,475 --> 00:12:30,541
No, actually, you were wrong.
I had a vision.
344
00:12:30,610 --> 00:12:32,010
I was a turtle, and this other tur...
345
00:12:32,112 --> 00:12:34,045
- You had a vision?
- Yeah, I was a turtle...
346
00:12:34,147 --> 00:12:35,770
I've never had a vision!
347
00:12:36,015 --> 00:12:38,649
You don't even believe.
I'm almost morning mist!
348
00:12:38,751 --> 00:12:40,995
I should be having a vision. Not you.
349
00:12:41,090 --> 00:12:42,304
How did you have a vision?
350
00:12:45,280 --> 00:12:45,890
EMERY: How's it going?
351
00:12:45,958 --> 00:12:48,299
You finding any underwear
mentions in the Bible?
352
00:12:48,468 --> 00:12:49,427
Got another tape of "Regis."
353
00:12:49,495 --> 00:12:51,495
Day 2 of them not wearing
underwear for Lent.
354
00:12:51,597 --> 00:12:53,097
Regis still found a way to work in
355
00:12:53,166 --> 00:12:55,279
that he graduated from Notre Dame.
356
00:13:01,506 --> 00:13:02,839
Why is it so important
357
00:13:02,908 --> 00:13:04,708
for a son to look like
his father down there?
358
00:13:04,776 --> 00:13:06,977
When will anyone see you side by side?
359
00:13:07,079 --> 00:13:08,211
In the sauna.
360
00:13:08,313 --> 00:13:10,013
Just snip the kid already.
361
00:13:10,115 --> 00:13:12,801
If he's anything like his mother,
he'll be a lazy cleaner.
362
00:13:13,318 --> 00:13:14,384
Now gas me.
363
00:13:14,486 --> 00:13:15,585
- What?
- Jessica?
364
00:13:15,654 --> 00:13:17,487
I want a vision like the one Louis had.
365
00:13:17,589 --> 00:13:19,356
So, ergh, ergh, ergh.
366
00:13:19,424 --> 00:13:22,964
Uh, I just can't give gas
to people for the fun of it.
367
00:13:23,059 --> 00:13:25,628
I swore an ethical
code of responsibility.
368
00:13:25,697 --> 00:13:29,065
Well, then, have Honey crank
the dial and you turn around.
369
00:13:30,099 --> 00:13:31,300
Babe, you game?
370
00:13:31,402 --> 00:13:33,069
Sure, works for me.
371
00:13:33,171 --> 00:13:34,704
[SIGHS]
372
00:13:34,806 --> 00:13:38,341
[GAS HISSING]
373
00:13:38,409 --> 00:13:40,343
I don't feel anything. Turn it higher.
374
00:13:40,445 --> 00:13:41,510
It's all the way up.
375
00:13:41,579 --> 00:13:42,612
What is going on?
376
00:13:42,680 --> 00:13:43,746
I don't get it.
377
00:13:43,815 --> 00:13:45,915
That amount of nitrous
could knock out a rhino.
378
00:13:47,318 --> 00:13:49,418
Are you giving me the cheap stuff?
379
00:13:50,588 --> 00:13:52,260
[SCOFFS] I thought we were friends.
380
00:13:52,535 --> 00:13:54,390
Sub-par gas...
381
00:13:56,883 --> 00:13:58,297
- Lunch?
- I could eat.
382
00:14:01,643 --> 00:14:04,767
Delayed reaction. Sub-par gas, indeed.
383
00:14:08,600 --> 00:14:10,439
JESSICA: It worked. A vision.
384
00:14:10,541 --> 00:14:14,677
I've achieved the ultimate
level of being... morning mist.
385
00:14:14,779 --> 00:14:18,714
Ooh, does baby like the new humidifier?
386
00:14:18,816 --> 00:14:20,516
Marvin? Get out of my mist!
387
00:14:20,618 --> 00:14:23,185
Why are you talking like that?
388
00:14:23,831 --> 00:14:26,989
Who's my little
pookie-wookie-wookie-wookie?
389
00:14:27,091 --> 00:14:28,357
- No!
- Oh.
390
00:14:28,426 --> 00:14:30,393
I've come back as...
391
00:14:30,997 --> 00:14:34,363
Honey and Marvin's white baby?!
392
00:14:36,703 --> 00:14:39,139
Help. I am Jessica Huang.
393
00:14:39,237 --> 00:14:41,604
I'm supposed to be
reincarnated as morning mist,
394
00:14:41,673 --> 00:14:43,773
not in this white baby cage!
395
00:14:45,270 --> 00:14:46,543
Oh! A party?
396
00:14:47,160 --> 00:14:48,637
Okay, listen up.
397
00:14:48,711 --> 00:14:50,931
Before anyone gets too attached to me,
398
00:14:51,015 --> 00:14:52,982
I am not supposed to be here.
399
00:14:53,084 --> 00:14:55,150
I was reborn in the wrong body.
400
00:14:55,219 --> 00:14:57,653
Okay, time for your circumcision.
401
00:14:57,722 --> 00:14:59,888
What?! I am a boy?
402
00:14:59,957 --> 00:15:01,790
No way. I am out of here.
403
00:15:01,859 --> 00:15:04,960
[BABY CRIES]
404
00:15:05,307 --> 00:15:07,713
Ahh, I can't do anything!
405
00:15:07,861 --> 00:15:10,065
But I'm a woman of action!
406
00:15:11,461 --> 00:15:12,854
Let's talk about this.
407
00:15:12,936 --> 00:15:15,904
Don't just act, weigh the pros and cons.
408
00:15:17,688 --> 00:15:21,109
No!
409
00:15:22,012 --> 00:15:23,078
So I was right!
410
00:15:23,146 --> 00:15:24,712
Your vision showed you
that debating things
411
00:15:24,781 --> 00:15:26,047
is better than acting first.
412
00:15:26,116 --> 00:15:27,882
No, it showed me the exact opposite.
413
00:15:27,918 --> 00:15:29,784
How can you say that?
You got circumcised!
414
00:15:29,853 --> 00:15:31,786
You wanted people to
not rush in and mull.
415
00:15:31,888 --> 00:15:34,107
You didn't let me finish.
416
00:15:36,092 --> 00:15:38,225
You know what? That wasn't that bad.
417
00:15:38,294 --> 00:15:40,561
I feel faster. Streamlined.
418
00:15:42,098 --> 00:15:43,931
Madame Xing, thank God!
419
00:15:44,000 --> 00:15:45,533
Release me from this vision!
420
00:15:45,601 --> 00:15:47,354
What a little cutie!
421
00:15:49,238 --> 00:15:51,839
Why are you holding my
husband's nice hand?
422
00:15:51,908 --> 00:15:54,075
I still can't believe how
quickly you guys got married.
423
00:15:54,177 --> 00:15:55,176
What?
424
00:15:55,244 --> 00:15:56,444
[BABY GURGLES]
425
00:15:56,946 --> 00:15:58,612
I just threw up.
426
00:15:58,681 --> 00:16:01,813
You let a piece of prime
meat hit the market,
427
00:16:01,971 --> 00:16:03,650
it's gonna get snatched.
428
00:16:03,719 --> 00:16:05,886
Xing, you viper!
429
00:16:05,988 --> 00:16:08,396
As soon as I can walk,
I'm coming for you.
430
00:16:10,317 --> 00:16:12,027
[STERNLY] Boys, use napkins.
431
00:16:12,360 --> 00:16:14,360
ALL: Yes, Mommy Xing.
432
00:16:14,711 --> 00:16:16,362
JESSICA: Well,
I don't hate the discipline.
433
00:16:18,166 --> 00:16:19,332
[SIGHS]
434
00:16:19,367 --> 00:16:21,101
I can't believe your mom isn't here.
435
00:16:21,169 --> 00:16:23,503
She's the one who convinced
me to snip little Dan.
436
00:16:23,605 --> 00:16:25,772
- Dan?!
- I know.
437
00:16:25,841 --> 00:16:28,641
I wish she and Madame Xing
had never gone to the beach.
438
00:16:28,710 --> 00:16:30,758
Such a freak accident.
439
00:16:31,254 --> 00:16:33,914
They were debating whether to
play volleyball or go kayaking
440
00:16:33,948 --> 00:16:37,149
when that rogue wave surprised
Mom and swept her out to sea.
441
00:16:37,218 --> 00:16:39,518
I married Madame Xing?
442
00:16:39,620 --> 00:16:41,020
I was right.
443
00:16:41,088 --> 00:16:43,856
If I had acted quickly
instead of debating,
444
00:16:43,925 --> 00:16:46,992
I would have lived instead
of being eaten by the ocean.
445
00:16:47,061 --> 00:16:48,227
Okay, this is ridiculous.
446
00:16:48,296 --> 00:16:49,929
We're debating nitrous-gas dreams.
447
00:16:49,997 --> 00:16:51,163
What about reality?
448
00:16:51,232 --> 00:16:52,765
Okay, let's talk reality.
449
00:16:52,800 --> 00:16:54,033
You and I made a decision
450
00:16:54,101 --> 00:16:56,101
to buy back Kenny Rogers'
half of the restaurant
451
00:16:56,170 --> 00:16:57,836
and now you get all wishy-washy?
452
00:16:57,939 --> 00:16:59,238
Well, maybe without Kenny Rogers
453
00:16:59,340 --> 00:17:01,040
and Michael Bolton's names on the sign,
454
00:17:01,108 --> 00:17:02,855
people would stop coming in.
455
00:17:02,976 --> 00:17:04,442
Or maybe they wouldn't. I don't know.
456
00:17:04,545 --> 00:17:06,244
I just wanted more time
to think it through.
457
00:17:06,313 --> 00:17:08,246
Why do you have to talk
everything to death?
458
00:17:08,348 --> 00:17:09,881
At least I don't act without thinking.
459
00:17:09,950 --> 00:17:11,616
You bought a lobster tank on a whim!
460
00:17:11,685 --> 00:17:13,685
- That thing is beautiful!
- It's empty!
461
00:17:13,754 --> 00:17:16,096
I don't know where Matthew
or the lobsters went!
462
00:17:16,159 --> 00:17:18,534
_
463
00:17:18,625 --> 00:17:20,892
How can we both be right?
We're saying opposite things.
464
00:17:21,383 --> 00:17:22,681
_
465
00:17:22,829 --> 00:17:26,702
_
466
00:17:27,356 --> 00:17:30,775
_
467
00:17:30,912 --> 00:17:32,443
_
468
00:17:32,559 --> 00:17:34,807
_
469
00:17:35,039 --> 00:17:39,031
_
470
00:17:39,115 --> 00:17:40,720
_
471
00:17:41,015 --> 00:17:43,548
_
472
00:17:43,622 --> 00:17:45,838
_
473
00:17:45,976 --> 00:17:49,126
_
474
00:17:50,371 --> 00:17:53,759
_
475
00:17:53,886 --> 00:17:56,112
_
476
00:17:56,239 --> 00:17:58,392
That's why I couldn't follow it.
477
00:17:58,814 --> 00:18:01,966
_
478
00:18:02,304 --> 00:18:05,090
_
479
00:18:05,344 --> 00:18:06,948
_
480
00:18:07,085 --> 00:18:08,531
_
481
00:18:08,995 --> 00:18:10,544
That makes a lot of sense.
482
00:18:10,612 --> 00:18:12,640
We do work well together.
483
00:18:12,946 --> 00:18:14,848
You can't argue with success.
484
00:18:16,218 --> 00:18:17,284
Insightful.
485
00:18:17,353 --> 00:18:18,452
Maybe in your next life,
486
00:18:18,521 --> 00:18:20,587
you will come back as morning mist.
487
00:18:23,935 --> 00:18:25,360
_
488
00:18:26,331 --> 00:18:28,505
So what do you want to
do about the restaurant?
489
00:18:29,212 --> 00:18:30,756
[SIGHS DEEPLY] Well, I looked at my list
490
00:18:30,832 --> 00:18:33,466
and after carefully
weighing the pros and cons,
491
00:18:33,535 --> 00:18:35,035
I think we should buy back
492
00:18:35,137 --> 00:18:36,469
Kenny Rogers' half of the restaurant.
493
00:18:36,538 --> 00:18:37,837
Are you sure that's what you want?
494
00:18:37,939 --> 00:18:39,051
I'm sure.
495
00:18:39,431 --> 00:18:41,007
I'm glad.
496
00:18:41,950 --> 00:18:44,155
Because I already signed
the papers with Lorenzo.
497
00:18:44,303 --> 00:18:45,879
- What?
- I acted before thinking,
498
00:18:45,947 --> 00:18:47,723
but that's what you love about me!
499
00:18:47,782 --> 00:18:48,881
When did you do this?
500
00:18:48,950 --> 00:18:50,249
Early on. Very early.
501
00:18:50,318 --> 00:18:51,918
I stopped Lorenzo in the parking lot
502
00:18:52,020 --> 00:18:53,653
as he was leaving Cattleman's.
503
00:18:53,755 --> 00:18:55,721
Signed the papers on
the hood of his car.
504
00:18:55,790 --> 00:18:56,689
I Yang-ed it.
505
00:18:56,791 --> 00:18:58,324
Then why fly in Madame Xing?
506
00:18:58,393 --> 00:18:59,892
Because you were so against it,
507
00:18:59,994 --> 00:19:01,427
I thought she could convince you.
508
00:19:01,496 --> 00:19:03,196
I didn't know that
Morning Mist over here
509
00:19:03,264 --> 00:19:04,730
was sitting on the Yin-Yang key.
510
00:19:05,433 --> 00:19:06,799
Why did you tell me now?
511
00:19:06,901 --> 00:19:08,701
Because now you agree with me.
512
00:19:12,447 --> 00:19:15,374
Dear Jesus, is it true they said on
"Regis and Kathie Lee"
513
00:19:15,443 --> 00:19:17,178
that you didn't wear underwear?
514
00:19:17,304 --> 00:19:20,260
If I watch, I break Lent,
but I need to know.
515
00:19:20,428 --> 00:19:22,413
Please, just give me a sign.
516
00:19:23,268 --> 00:19:23,982
I feel bad.
517
00:19:24,085 --> 00:19:25,884
My heart.
518
00:19:26,958 --> 00:19:29,142
There was no segment about Jesus'
underwear.
519
00:19:29,216 --> 00:19:30,756
We made it all up.
520
00:19:31,359 --> 00:19:33,723
You work in mysterious ways,
you all-knowing shepherd.
521
00:19:33,860 --> 00:19:34,558
We're sorry.
522
00:19:34,642 --> 00:19:36,732
It's just that you get so
unbearable during Lent.
523
00:19:36,869 --> 00:19:38,695
That's why we tried to get you to break.
524
00:19:38,865 --> 00:19:40,598
But you got to forgive us, right?
525
00:19:40,700 --> 00:19:41,900
Your religion says so.
526
00:19:41,968 --> 00:19:43,856
God forgives unconditionally.
527
00:19:44,437 --> 00:19:45,537
But I don't.
528
00:19:45,639 --> 00:19:48,106
I tell Mommy unless
you make it up to me.
529
00:19:49,190 --> 00:19:50,408
Good morning! I am Regis Philbin.
530
00:19:50,510 --> 00:19:52,677
And I'm Kathie Lee Gifford.
531
00:19:52,712 --> 00:19:55,313
I don't want to be Kathie Lee.
Can't we both be Regis?
532
00:19:55,348 --> 00:19:56,314
Don't be ridiculous.
533
00:19:56,416 --> 00:19:57,949
America can't handle two Regises.
534
00:19:58,051 --> 00:19:59,417
Now, do it like I wrote it.
535
00:20:01,881 --> 00:20:03,696
We got a great show
for you this morning.
536
00:20:03,789 --> 00:20:05,156
Reba McEntire's here.
537
00:20:05,224 --> 00:20:06,724
Caught her sound check.
538
00:20:06,792 --> 00:20:09,393
You're in for a treat,
America, so don't go anywhere.
539
00:20:10,593 --> 00:20:11,962
Oh, what are we watching?
540
00:20:12,064 --> 00:20:13,697
Eddie and Emery are
acting out a fake episode
541
00:20:13,766 --> 00:20:14,899
of "Regis and Kathie Lee" I wrote.
542
00:20:15,001 --> 00:20:15,933
Great.
543
00:20:16,035 --> 00:20:17,067
Where's Dad?
544
00:20:17,170 --> 00:20:18,702
Oh, he's Yin-ing out.
545
00:20:19,463 --> 00:20:21,038
He's making a pro and con list
546
00:20:21,107 --> 00:20:22,640
about whether he's going
to speak to me again.
547
00:20:22,742 --> 00:20:25,226
It'll take him a while,
but he'll come around eventually.
548
00:20:25,374 --> 00:20:28,268
Did you see this?
Some disturbing news out of Buffalo.
549
00:20:28,416 --> 00:20:30,147
A truck jack-knifed off the interstate,
550
00:20:30,249 --> 00:20:32,783
killing 50 cattle and a hitchhiker.
551
00:20:32,885 --> 00:20:33,884
I hitchhiked once.
552
00:20:33,986 --> 00:20:35,352
[GASPS] Kathie Lee!
553
00:20:35,846 --> 00:20:36,720
This is good.
554
00:20:37,155 --> 00:20:37,855
I know.
555
00:20:37,957 --> 00:20:40,159
EMERY: [DEFENSIVELY] Reg,
it was the '60s!
556
00:20:43,403 --> 00:20:45,503
Your face is red as a lobster.
557
00:20:45,605 --> 00:20:48,606
I should throw you in the
tank at the restaurant.
558
00:20:48,708 --> 00:20:49,841
God knows there's room.
559
00:20:49,943 --> 00:20:51,642
I was at Disney all day!
560
00:20:51,744 --> 00:20:52,810
I met Goofy.
561
00:20:52,912 --> 00:20:54,946
Did you try and kill Mrs. Goofy
562
00:20:55,048 --> 00:20:56,948
so you could have him all for yourself?
563
00:20:57,727 --> 00:20:58,883
What are you talking about?
564
00:20:58,985 --> 00:20:59,917
I had a vision.
565
00:20:59,986 --> 00:21:01,185
You let me die
566
00:21:01,287 --> 00:21:03,688
and then you stole my husband.
567
00:21:03,790 --> 00:21:04,856
You're fired, Xing.
568
00:21:04,924 --> 00:21:07,124
But I'm your psychic. You need me!
569
00:21:07,227 --> 00:21:08,759
I'll find a new psychic.
570
00:21:08,862 --> 00:21:10,061
One who's local
571
00:21:10,163 --> 00:21:12,330
and on anti-depressants
to squelch her sex drive.
572
00:21:12,846 --> 00:21:16,300
I see you rethinking this
after a good night's sleep.
573
00:21:16,402 --> 00:21:21,072
Mm, I see you walking back to D.C.
574
00:21:24,233 --> 00:21:26,755
sync and corrected by ninh
www.addic7ed.com
575
00:21:26,805 --> 00:21:31,355
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
41064
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