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1
00:00:01,500 --> 00:00:03,760
Okay, Connie. We've talked enough.
2
00:00:03,918 --> 00:00:04,499
[TELEPHONE BEEPS]
3
00:00:04,569 --> 00:00:05,937
Why are you making that face?
4
00:00:06,004 --> 00:00:07,069
What are you reading?
5
00:00:07,105 --> 00:00:09,105
My mom's homework for her English class.
6
00:00:09,140 --> 00:00:10,740
Listen to what she put
down for the answers...
7
00:00:10,775 --> 00:00:13,491
"The loaf of bread is... sad."
8
00:00:13,677 --> 00:00:15,944
"The puppy is... broken."
9
00:00:15,980 --> 00:00:18,647
"The seashells are... all dead."
10
00:00:18,682 --> 00:00:20,249
I know, she's a terrible student.
11
00:00:20,284 --> 00:00:21,450
I think she's lonely.
12
00:00:21,485 --> 00:00:23,285
It's tough being her age
at this time of the year.
13
00:00:23,320 --> 00:00:24,453
Statistically.
14
00:00:24,488 --> 00:00:25,788
The holiday blues.
15
00:00:25,823 --> 00:00:27,256
Louis, I know your mother.
16
00:00:27,291 --> 00:00:28,624
She's not lonely.
17
00:00:28,659 --> 00:00:31,940
Her English isn't good
because she never practices.
18
00:00:32,129 --> 00:00:33,762
Except when she swears at the mailman
19
00:00:33,797 --> 00:00:34,996
because her coupons are late.
20
00:00:35,032 --> 00:00:37,532
[BLEEP] [BLEEP] [BLEEP]
21
00:00:39,457 --> 00:00:40,402
[BLEEP] Twice!
22
00:00:40,437 --> 00:00:42,571
I'll say this,
her English is great when she swears.
23
00:00:42,606 --> 00:00:43,772
It's a different part of her brain.
24
00:00:43,807 --> 00:00:44,906
So, I just told my sister
25
00:00:44,942 --> 00:00:46,608
we're not going to her
house for Thanksgiving
26
00:00:46,643 --> 00:00:48,643
because we're opening the
restaurant again this year.
27
00:00:49,079 --> 00:00:50,511
Mm.
28
00:00:50,547 --> 00:00:53,615
I wish we could just jump to
the day after Thanksgiving.
29
00:00:53,650 --> 00:00:55,550
Black Friday.
30
00:00:55,585 --> 00:00:56,784
No relatives.
31
00:00:56,820 --> 00:00:58,620
Christmas songs come on the radio.
32
00:00:58,655 --> 00:01:00,521
Tupperware bulging with leftovers.
33
00:01:00,557 --> 00:01:03,191
Me and Honey finally
outsmarting the shopping lines.
34
00:01:03,226 --> 00:01:04,726
We'll use your mother's wheelchair
35
00:01:04,761 --> 00:01:06,327
and cut straight to the front.
36
00:01:07,033 --> 00:01:09,630
I'm gonna take a bed nap
and a couch nap that day.
37
00:01:09,665 --> 00:01:12,699
I am going to get us a
brand-new fridge for so cheap.
38
00:01:12,735 --> 00:01:15,269
[SIGHING] The day after Thanksgiving.
39
00:01:15,304 --> 00:01:16,336
[SIGHS]
40
00:01:16,372 --> 00:01:17,871
There's nothing better.
41
00:01:17,907 --> 00:01:20,174
This is a nightmare!
I hope you're happy!
42
00:01:20,209 --> 00:01:21,675
Me?! This is all your fault!
43
00:01:21,710 --> 00:01:22,676
Look what you did to him!
44
00:01:22,711 --> 00:01:24,311
This is on you! You did this!
45
00:01:24,346 --> 00:01:27,681
[HAUNTINGLY] ? I love you,
you love me ?
46
00:01:27,716 --> 00:01:30,651
? We're a happy family ?
47
00:01:30,686 --> 00:01:32,152
- Why would you say it's my fault?!
- Because it's your...
48
00:01:32,188 --> 00:01:33,320
[DISH CLATTERS]
49
00:01:33,905 --> 00:01:34,771
Go screw.
50
00:01:34,834 --> 00:01:35,921
At least I wasn't doing it for selfish
reasons.
51
00:01:35,974 --> 00:01:36,649
It's always "Eddie, Eddie, Eddie!"
52
00:01:36,692 --> 00:01:38,518
- When is it ever your fault?!
- You pressured it...
53
00:01:38,623 --> 00:01:40,364
S04E07
The Day After Thanksgiving
54
00:01:40,429 --> 00:01:41,562
? Fresh off the boat ?
55
00:01:41,597 --> 00:01:43,263
? I'm gettin' mine everywhere I go ?
56
00:01:43,299 --> 00:01:45,566
? If you don't know,
homey, now you know ?
57
00:01:45,601 --> 00:01:46,834
? Fresh off the boat ?
58
00:01:46,869 --> 00:01:49,169
? Homey,
you don't know where I come from ?
59
00:01:49,205 --> 00:01:50,637
? But I know where I'm goin' ?
60
00:01:50,673 --> 00:01:52,131
? I'm fresh off the boat ?
61
00:01:52,215 --> 00:01:54,484
sync and corrected by ninh
www.addic7ed.com
62
00:02:02,717 --> 00:02:04,131
_
63
00:02:04,286 --> 00:02:05,385
It's not my fault.
64
00:02:05,420 --> 00:02:07,821
Your nails have ridges
like potato chips.
65
00:02:07,856 --> 00:02:08,988
Grandma?
66
00:02:09,024 --> 00:02:10,090
I know a movie you should do
67
00:02:10,125 --> 00:02:11,691
for your ESL final monologue...
68
00:02:11,727 --> 00:02:12,591
"The Sandlot."
69
00:02:12,686 --> 00:02:13,668
_
70
00:02:13,794 --> 00:02:16,180
_
71
00:02:16,792 --> 00:02:19,399
Mom, can you take me to
the Teacher Supply Store?
72
00:02:19,434 --> 00:02:20,800
I need a 3-hole punch,
73
00:02:20,836 --> 00:02:22,368
one with some cojones.
74
00:02:22,404 --> 00:02:23,369
I can't. I'm busy.
75
00:02:23,405 --> 00:02:24,838
Fine. I'll walk.
76
00:02:24,873 --> 00:02:26,639
Not by yourself, you won't.
77
00:02:26,675 --> 00:02:27,807
Why not?
78
00:02:27,843 --> 00:02:29,542
I'm in middle school now.
Just like Emery.
79
00:02:29,578 --> 00:02:31,044
It's different. Emery's older.
80
00:02:31,079 --> 00:02:32,212
You skipped a grade.
81
00:02:32,247 --> 00:02:33,780
Because I'm so mature.
82
00:02:33,815 --> 00:02:36,649
You just had me buy you a
Barney the Dinosaur lamp.
83
00:02:36,685 --> 00:02:39,252
A plain lamp or a lamp
with an icon on it
84
00:02:39,287 --> 00:02:41,087
for the same price.
85
00:02:41,123 --> 00:02:42,989
[SCOFFS] I mean, really, where am I?
86
00:02:43,024 --> 00:02:44,891
Ask one of your brothers
if they'll take you.
87
00:02:44,926 --> 00:02:46,559
Otherwise, you can't go.
88
00:02:46,595 --> 00:02:47,909
[SIGHS] Cut the cord already.
89
00:02:47,983 --> 00:02:48,965
_
90
00:02:49,007 --> 00:02:52,072
_
91
00:02:52,136 --> 00:02:53,133
[DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES]
92
00:02:53,168 --> 00:02:55,835
"One Crazy Summer." Joel Murray.
Any line. They're all brilliant.
93
00:02:55,871 --> 00:02:56,970
Bill Murray's brother?
94
00:02:57,005 --> 00:02:58,872
Brian Doyle-Murray's brother?
95
00:02:58,907 --> 00:03:00,240
There's three of them?
96
00:03:00,275 --> 00:03:01,277
Ugh, my God.
97
00:03:01,343 --> 00:03:03,043
Dinner at the Murrays'
must have been exhausting.
98
00:03:03,078 --> 00:03:06,046
Everybody trying so hard
while pretending not to.
99
00:03:06,081 --> 00:03:07,180
I got some bad news.
100
00:03:07,216 --> 00:03:08,448
Matthew Chestnut said we can't
101
00:03:08,484 --> 00:03:11,351
- open the restaurant on Thanksgiving.
- Why not?
102
00:03:11,386 --> 00:03:13,920
Apparently the holiday's
sacred to Kenny Rogers.
103
00:03:13,956 --> 00:03:16,022
Something about being
part Native American,
104
00:03:16,058 --> 00:03:18,080
and how he lost his virginity
on that day.
105
00:03:18,165 --> 00:03:18,682
Folksy.
106
00:03:18,760 --> 00:03:19,826
Yeah, well, there goes our excuse
107
00:03:19,862 --> 00:03:21,027
to get out of Thanksgiving.
108
00:03:21,063 --> 00:03:22,028
What do we do now?
109
00:03:22,064 --> 00:03:23,530
Well, my family's in D.C.
110
00:03:23,565 --> 00:03:25,899
They won't know if we worked or not.
111
00:03:25,934 --> 00:03:27,100
Yeah...
112
00:03:29,838 --> 00:03:32,272
I'll smash the cordless and
siphon the gas from the car,
113
00:03:32,307 --> 00:03:33,974
say we're victims of a
holiday crime wave...
114
00:03:34,009 --> 00:03:35,208
Couldn't call even if we wanted.
115
00:03:35,244 --> 00:03:36,610
Or we just don't say anything
116
00:03:36,645 --> 00:03:38,245
and they'll assume we worked.
117
00:03:38,280 --> 00:03:39,679
Yeah. That's a good plan, too.
118
00:03:39,715 --> 00:03:42,015
Now we don't have to
suffer work or family,
119
00:03:42,050 --> 00:03:44,518
and I can focus on Black Friday.
120
00:03:44,553 --> 00:03:45,919
Me and Honey are deciding
121
00:03:45,954 --> 00:03:47,973
who's gonna push the
other in the wheelchair.
122
00:03:48,173 --> 00:03:49,640
_
123
00:03:49,767 --> 00:03:51,551
_
124
00:03:51,660 --> 00:03:52,692
What? Why?
125
00:03:52,775 --> 00:03:53,577
_
126
00:03:53,980 --> 00:03:58,793
_
127
00:03:59,134 --> 00:04:00,567
[SIGHS]
128
00:04:00,692 --> 00:04:05,140
_
129
00:04:05,340 --> 00:04:07,768
_
130
00:04:08,277 --> 00:04:09,709
Hmm?
131
00:04:09,745 --> 00:04:10,844
[COINS CLATTERING]
132
00:04:10,879 --> 00:04:11,945
Hey.
133
00:04:11,980 --> 00:04:13,046
I need you guys to take me
134
00:04:13,081 --> 00:04:14,347
to the Teacher Supply Store.
135
00:04:14,383 --> 00:04:15,348
Forget it.
136
00:04:15,384 --> 00:04:16,483
We're going to the mall.
137
00:04:16,518 --> 00:04:17,651
You're welcome to come.
138
00:04:17,686 --> 00:04:19,185
It's my first Thanksgiving since
139
00:04:19,221 --> 00:04:20,420
Alison and I broke up.
140
00:04:20,455 --> 00:04:22,188
I can't risk the blues.
141
00:04:22,224 --> 00:04:24,891
This time of the year is the
toughest on single teenagers.
142
00:04:24,927 --> 00:04:26,326
Statistically.
143
00:04:26,361 --> 00:04:28,161
He said he heard it on "Povich."
144
00:04:28,196 --> 00:04:29,796
Maury does his research.
145
00:04:29,831 --> 00:04:30,997
I need a distraction,
146
00:04:31,033 --> 00:04:32,966
so we're gonna hit up
the holiday ice rink.
147
00:04:33,001 --> 00:04:34,367
It's always a sea of girls.
148
00:04:34,403 --> 00:04:35,902
They don't open the rink until Friday,
149
00:04:35,938 --> 00:04:37,938
so you can take me to
the supply store now.
150
00:04:37,973 --> 00:04:40,273
No. We're going to the
mall to shop for socks.
151
00:04:40,309 --> 00:04:42,342
Who buys socks a month
out from Christmas?
152
00:04:42,377 --> 00:04:44,077
Socks are Santa's job.
153
00:04:44,112 --> 00:04:45,412
I need pimp socks.
154
00:04:45,447 --> 00:04:47,936
The skate changing area is co-ed.
155
00:04:48,082 --> 00:04:51,284
I can't walk around in these...
chump things.
156
00:04:52,420 --> 00:04:54,353
You need to cut your toenails.
157
00:04:56,491 --> 00:04:58,491
I'm talking about taking
your body to heaven
158
00:04:58,526 --> 00:05:00,459
and sending your mind south.
159
00:05:00,495 --> 00:05:02,962
I'm talking about spoiling you so bad
160
00:05:02,997 --> 00:05:04,897
you'll hate every other woman you touch.
161
00:05:04,933 --> 00:05:07,266
I'm talking about my
mouth on your mouth,
162
00:05:07,302 --> 00:05:09,202
and my tongue anywhere you...
163
00:05:09,237 --> 00:05:10,636
All right, cut.
164
00:05:10,672 --> 00:05:12,038
[APPLAUSE]
165
00:05:12,073 --> 00:05:15,141
Let's hear it for Donnie...
166
00:05:15,176 --> 00:05:18,311
channeling his inner Streisand.
167
00:05:18,946 --> 00:05:24,349
And now, for our final act of
ESL's Night-Out-At-The-Movies,
168
00:05:24,385 --> 00:05:29,621
we have Jenny Huang reciting
from Tim Burton's "Batman."
169
00:05:29,657 --> 00:05:32,157
[LIGHT APPLAUSE]
170
00:05:32,193 --> 00:05:35,127
Looks live I saved the best for last.
171
00:05:35,650 --> 00:05:37,170
Professor.
172
00:05:37,634 --> 00:05:40,098
Gotham is a lucky city tonight.
173
00:05:43,303 --> 00:05:45,303
[CLEARS THROAT]
174
00:05:45,339 --> 00:05:50,141
Let me tell you about this guy I know,
Jack.
175
00:05:52,212 --> 00:05:54,145
I've never seen so many socks.
176
00:05:54,180 --> 00:05:56,547
They had a whole section
devoted to frogs!
177
00:05:56,583 --> 00:05:58,182
The mall... It's got everything.
178
00:05:58,218 --> 00:06:01,119
Except a 3-hole punch worth a damn.
179
00:06:01,154 --> 00:06:03,021
Hey, want to see that movie?
180
00:06:03,056 --> 00:06:04,489
"I Know What You Did Last Summer"?
181
00:06:04,524 --> 00:06:05,590
It's rated R.
182
00:06:05,625 --> 00:06:07,492
Walter works at the theater.
He'll let us in.
183
00:06:07,527 --> 00:06:09,794
Evan's too young to
see an R-rated movie.
184
00:06:09,829 --> 00:06:11,996
I saw my first R when I was 7.
185
00:06:12,032 --> 00:06:13,965
"The Fabulous Baker Boys."
186
00:06:14,000 --> 00:06:15,700
Evan's not like you.
187
00:06:15,735 --> 00:06:17,435
Yeah, he skips grades,
188
00:06:17,470 --> 00:06:20,271
shops at teacher stores,
and he uses napkins.
189
00:06:20,306 --> 00:06:21,873
He's way more mature than I was.
190
00:06:21,908 --> 00:06:25,174
He's book smart, not street smart.
Exactly.
191
00:06:25,364 --> 00:06:27,845
And it's our job as older
brothers to toughen him up.
192
00:06:27,880 --> 00:06:29,446
I don't know.
193
00:06:29,482 --> 00:06:30,888
Evan.
194
00:06:31,380 --> 00:06:32,683
Would you like to go see "Flubber"
195
00:06:32,718 --> 00:06:34,418
or "I Know What You Did Last Summer"?
196
00:06:35,046 --> 00:06:37,187
Both have really strong casts.
197
00:06:37,223 --> 00:06:39,456
Mom would want you to see the
little kids' movie "Flubber."
198
00:06:39,492 --> 00:06:40,791
You should definitely go see that.
199
00:06:40,826 --> 00:06:41,992
I'm not a little kid.
200
00:06:42,028 --> 00:06:43,560
I'm a pre-tween.
201
00:06:43,596 --> 00:06:46,297
"Flubber" can go flub itself.
202
00:06:46,332 --> 00:06:47,731
Yes!
203
00:06:51,065 --> 00:06:53,046
Hey, great job up there, Mom.
204
00:06:53,173 --> 00:06:54,038
I mean, Bruce Wayne.
205
00:06:54,450 --> 00:06:55,639
[AS MICHAEL KEATON]
"Now you wanna get nuts?
206
00:06:55,674 --> 00:06:56,940
C'mon, let's get nuts."
207
00:06:56,975 --> 00:06:58,397
Mom?
208
00:06:58,744 --> 00:07:01,378
Jenny,
you told me you didn't have any kids.
209
00:07:01,413 --> 00:07:02,512
She did?
210
00:07:02,547 --> 00:07:04,281
You did?
211
00:07:04,316 --> 00:07:06,750
[LAUGHS HEARTILY]
212
00:07:06,785 --> 00:07:08,184
[CHUCKLING]
213
00:07:08,220 --> 00:07:09,185
You got me!
214
00:07:09,221 --> 00:07:10,720
You must be Louis.
215
00:07:10,756 --> 00:07:12,022
Bernard.
216
00:07:12,057 --> 00:07:13,990
I've heard a lot about you.
217
00:07:14,026 --> 00:07:15,225
Well, it's nice to meet you.
218
00:07:15,260 --> 00:07:17,193
My mom can't say enough
about your class.
219
00:07:17,229 --> 00:07:20,096
- And you.
- Well, the pleasure was all mine.
220
00:07:20,132 --> 00:07:21,331
A model student.
221
00:07:21,366 --> 00:07:24,034
I can't believe it's almost over.
222
00:07:24,069 --> 00:07:26,336
- I'm gonna miss her.
- Miss her?
223
00:07:26,371 --> 00:07:28,038
Only a final exam left,
224
00:07:28,073 --> 00:07:30,674
and then she'll flap out of my life.
225
00:07:30,709 --> 00:07:32,042
Like the Batman.
226
00:07:32,077 --> 00:07:34,811
[LAUGHS HEARTILY]
227
00:07:37,950 --> 00:07:40,350
I invited Bernard to Thanksgiving!
228
00:07:44,480 --> 00:07:45,613
So now I have to race around
229
00:07:45,648 --> 00:07:47,281
and whip up a Thanksgiving dinner
230
00:07:47,316 --> 00:07:50,351
because you invited
your mother's teacher?
231
00:07:50,419 --> 00:07:52,953
Jessica, I have never seen
my mom this happy ever.
232
00:07:52,988 --> 00:07:54,721
Bernard is the answer to her loneliness.
233
00:07:54,757 --> 00:07:56,623
Come on, Louis, wake up!
234
00:07:56,659 --> 00:07:58,725
She's just trying to work him for an
"A."
235
00:07:58,761 --> 00:08:00,394
But the goal is to improve her English.
236
00:08:00,429 --> 00:08:01,915
Why would she care about her grade?
237
00:08:01,999 --> 00:08:03,563
Because she's a human.
238
00:08:03,598 --> 00:08:05,031
Everybody wants an "A."
239
00:08:05,066 --> 00:08:07,100
No, you should have seen them.
The connection was obvious.
240
00:08:07,135 --> 00:08:08,301
You could tell he was interested,
241
00:08:08,336 --> 00:08:09,769
but he's clearly an honorable man.
242
00:08:09,804 --> 00:08:11,671
He didn't want to cross
the teacher-student line.
243
00:08:11,706 --> 00:08:14,507
Like Amy Fisher, the Long Island Lolita.
244
00:08:14,992 --> 00:08:17,043
No, that's way off.
Buttafuoco was her mechanic.
245
00:08:17,078 --> 00:08:18,478
The point is, they both need a chance
246
00:08:18,513 --> 00:08:20,146
to get to know each
other outside of class.
247
00:08:20,181 --> 00:08:21,848
So take them on a boat ride!
248
00:08:21,883 --> 00:08:23,468
I am not going...
249
00:08:23,721 --> 00:08:24,817
Jessica!
250
00:08:25,368 --> 00:08:28,756
_
251
00:08:28,872 --> 00:08:32,872
_
252
00:08:33,357 --> 00:08:37,568
_
253
00:08:37,632 --> 00:08:38,723
Hmm?
254
00:08:42,026 --> 00:08:44,627
But you've never offered
to pay for anything.
255
00:08:44,665 --> 00:08:45,661
Ever.
256
00:08:45,826 --> 00:08:48,327
_
257
00:08:48,328 --> 00:08:49,732
Mm, no, you didn't.
258
00:08:49,849 --> 00:08:52,498
_
259
00:08:52,804 --> 00:08:54,493
Clean cotton.
260
00:08:58,476 --> 00:08:59,776
[LAUGHTER ON TELEVISION]
261
00:09:00,311 --> 00:09:01,377
Have you talked to Evan?
262
00:09:01,412 --> 00:09:02,678
"I Know What You Did Last Summer"
263
00:09:02,713 --> 00:09:03,812
really messed him up.
264
00:09:03,848 --> 00:09:05,347
He had nightmares all night.
265
00:09:05,383 --> 00:09:07,116
It's a horror movie.
266
00:09:07,151 --> 00:09:08,217
It's supposed to scare you.
267
00:09:08,252 --> 00:09:10,256
What if the stress gets to be too much
268
00:09:10,387 --> 00:09:11,720
and he cries to Mom,
269
00:09:11,755 --> 00:09:13,822
says that we took him
to an R-rated movie?
270
00:09:13,857 --> 00:09:15,157
Bye-bye, ice skating.
271
00:09:15,192 --> 00:09:17,192
- Bye-bye, gentleman socks.
- Pimp socks.
272
00:09:17,227 --> 00:09:19,861
Pimping is not all goblets and dancing.
273
00:09:19,897 --> 00:09:21,663
It's women suffering, Eddie.
274
00:09:25,135 --> 00:09:26,735
We need to talk to him.
275
00:09:26,770 --> 00:09:28,136
Make sure he's okay.
276
00:09:28,171 --> 00:09:29,704
Help him through it.
277
00:09:29,740 --> 00:09:31,473
Hey, Evan, want to go ride bikes?
278
00:09:31,508 --> 00:09:33,007
So we can accidentally hit a fisherman
279
00:09:33,043 --> 00:09:34,375
and pay for it with our lives?
280
00:09:34,411 --> 00:09:35,577
No, thanks.
281
00:09:35,612 --> 00:09:38,413
And if you were smart,
you wouldn't go either.
282
00:09:38,448 --> 00:09:42,016
[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYS]
283
00:09:47,624 --> 00:09:48,689
Knock knock!
284
00:09:48,725 --> 00:09:49,924
Happy Thanksgiving!
285
00:09:49,959 --> 00:09:52,524
Oh, you mean, Happy Drinks-giving.
[BOTH CHUCKLE]
286
00:09:52,628 --> 00:09:54,895
This is one of my top-five
drinking holidays.
287
00:09:54,931 --> 00:09:56,263
I am going all-out.
288
00:09:56,299 --> 00:09:59,066
It could be the last one I get
to enjoy before I'm pregnant.
289
00:09:59,101 --> 00:10:01,335
Yeah, could be.
290
00:10:01,370 --> 00:10:02,536
Well, if you make it past noon,
291
00:10:02,572 --> 00:10:04,371
you're welcome to come over to my house.
292
00:10:04,407 --> 00:10:06,607
Well, thanks, but we already made plans.
293
00:10:06,642 --> 00:10:08,409
I thought you guys weren't
having Thanksgiving this year.
294
00:10:08,444 --> 00:10:11,278
Well, Louis invited his
mother's ESL teacher over,
295
00:10:11,314 --> 00:10:13,781
so she's cooking the
whole meal by herself.
296
00:10:13,816 --> 00:10:14,848
She is?
297
00:10:14,884 --> 00:10:16,317
But she'll miss the Macy's Parade.
298
00:10:16,352 --> 00:10:18,506
- VCR'ing it.
- Oh, damn.
299
00:10:18,654 --> 00:10:20,320
It's like she's a whole other person...
300
00:10:20,356 --> 00:10:22,756
Courteous, polite, kind.
301
00:10:22,791 --> 00:10:24,958
Just the type of person we can convince
302
00:10:24,994 --> 00:10:27,494
into letting us borrow her wheelchair.
303
00:10:27,529 --> 00:10:29,196
I'll drink a shot to that.
304
00:10:29,231 --> 00:10:30,678
You too, Emily.
305
00:10:30,846 --> 00:10:31,965
Keep pace.
306
00:10:34,336 --> 00:10:35,381
_
307
00:10:35,740 --> 00:10:37,304
Boys!
308
00:10:37,739 --> 00:10:40,807
Okay, everyone on their best behavior.
309
00:10:40,842 --> 00:10:42,308
This is important to Grandma.
310
00:10:42,344 --> 00:10:44,088
Is someone gonna search him for a knife?
311
00:10:44,173 --> 00:10:44,521
What?
312
00:10:44,579 --> 00:10:45,979
He's kidding. Making a joke.
313
00:10:46,014 --> 00:10:46,980
No jokes. [DOORBELL RINGS]
314
00:10:47,015 --> 00:10:47,981
GRANDMA: Oh!
315
00:10:48,468 --> 00:10:51,909
_
316
00:10:52,036 --> 00:10:53,086
Hello, teacher!
317
00:10:53,376 --> 00:10:56,022
Gobble, gobble. As the turkey says.
318
00:10:56,576 --> 00:10:59,215
Happy Thanksgiving, Jenny.
319
00:10:59,447 --> 00:11:01,327
Louis. Boys.
320
00:11:01,362 --> 00:11:02,494
Hello, Jessica.
321
00:11:02,530 --> 00:11:03,929
Hello, Bernard. Welcome.
322
00:11:03,965 --> 00:11:05,164
Happy Thanksgiving.
323
00:11:05,199 --> 00:11:08,200
I brought a chilled
bottle of Sauvignon Blanc
324
00:11:08,236 --> 00:11:10,936
and Jenny's last homework assignment...
325
00:11:10,972 --> 00:11:12,238
an "A."
326
00:11:12,273 --> 00:11:13,772
"A."
327
00:11:13,808 --> 00:11:17,042
Uh, well, one for inside the fridge.
One for outside.
328
00:11:17,078 --> 00:11:18,844
[LAUGHS HEARTILY]
329
00:11:18,879 --> 00:11:19,979
Yes! Yes!
330
00:11:20,014 --> 00:11:21,213
Amazing!
331
00:11:21,249 --> 00:11:22,214
Let's eat!
332
00:11:22,250 --> 00:11:24,016
Teacher on vacay!
333
00:11:24,051 --> 00:11:25,517
Okay, well, come inside.
334
00:11:32,592 --> 00:11:35,255
Yum, yum, yum, yum, yum.
335
00:11:35,796 --> 00:11:38,757
Yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum.
336
00:11:39,358 --> 00:11:40,965
Yum, yum, yum, yum.
337
00:11:41,001 --> 00:11:42,000
Ore-gone.
338
00:11:42,035 --> 00:11:43,201
Orr-eh-gan.
339
00:11:43,236 --> 00:11:44,202
Ore-gone.
340
00:11:44,237 --> 00:11:45,837
Orr-eh-gan.
341
00:11:45,872 --> 00:11:47,205
Mrs. Dash, huh?
342
00:11:48,408 --> 00:11:50,141
Where's Mr. Dash?
343
00:11:50,177 --> 00:11:52,077
[LAUGHS HEARTILY]
344
00:11:52,112 --> 00:11:54,012
You see, Oliver...
345
00:11:54,376 --> 00:11:56,948
in this life, one thing counts.
346
00:11:57,416 --> 00:11:59,918
In the bank, large amounts.
347
00:12:00,536 --> 00:12:03,090
? I'm afraid these
don't grow on trees ?
348
00:12:03,206 --> 00:12:05,856
? You've got to pick
a pocket or two ?
349
00:12:05,892 --> 00:12:09,193
? You've got to pick a pocket or two,
boys ?
350
00:12:09,228 --> 00:12:11,395
[FALSETTO] ? Large amounts
don't grow on trees ?
351
00:12:11,430 --> 00:12:13,564
? You've got to pick
a pocket or two ?
352
00:12:13,599 --> 00:12:15,266
[LAUGHS HEARTILY]
353
00:12:15,301 --> 00:12:17,268
[LAUGHS HEARTILY]
354
00:12:17,303 --> 00:12:22,417
[LAUGHS HEARTILY]
355
00:12:22,708 --> 00:12:25,042
[BURPS]
356
00:12:25,077 --> 00:12:26,277
[FORK CLINKS]
357
00:12:26,312 --> 00:12:28,879
[TELEVISION CHATTER]
358
00:12:29,812 --> 00:12:31,469
Grandma's new boyfriend.
359
00:12:31,670 --> 00:12:33,274
Oof.
360
00:12:34,256 --> 00:12:36,018
Hey, Evan...
361
00:12:36,588 --> 00:12:37,888
want to watch the parade with us?
362
00:12:37,923 --> 00:12:39,022
Grandma taped it.
363
00:12:39,057 --> 00:12:40,857
- No, thanks.
- Come on.
364
00:12:40,893 --> 00:12:43,493
Some nice family friendly
entertainment never hurt anyone.
365
00:12:45,488 --> 00:12:47,097
Hey, there's the Rugrats!
366
00:12:47,132 --> 00:12:48,698
And Sonic the Hedgehog!
367
00:12:48,734 --> 00:12:50,934
See? No scary bad guys here.
368
00:12:50,969 --> 00:12:52,302
Just like real life.
369
00:12:52,337 --> 00:12:53,837
Yep. It's all good.
370
00:12:53,872 --> 00:12:55,639
No need to tell Mom anything, right?
371
00:12:55,674 --> 00:12:57,407
Shh! I'm trying to watch.
372
00:12:57,442 --> 00:12:58,875
Barney's up next!
373
00:13:02,350 --> 00:13:03,912
MAN: Oh, there's another gust.
374
00:13:03,997 --> 00:13:05,569
It's so windy.
375
00:13:05,664 --> 00:13:07,638
They better hold on.
376
00:13:07,933 --> 00:13:09,085
[ CROWD SCREAMING]
377
00:13:09,696 --> 00:13:11,588
Oh no, Barney!
378
00:13:12,195 --> 00:13:14,357
Oh, he's been gutted!
379
00:13:14,392 --> 00:13:17,226
And it looks like the cops
are going in with knives
380
00:13:17,261 --> 00:13:18,794
to slice up the rest of him.
381
00:13:18,830 --> 00:13:22,732
[SCREAMING]
382
00:13:22,767 --> 00:13:25,468
Well, pie time.
383
00:13:26,202 --> 00:13:28,104
- You done with that?
- Um, I...
384
00:13:28,139 --> 00:13:32,375
Can't let your mom's good
work go to waste, right, son?
385
00:13:32,820 --> 00:13:34,710
Yum, yum. Mmm!
386
00:13:35,810 --> 00:13:37,815
You know,
I was just thinking how much better
387
00:13:37,882 --> 00:13:40,949
your homework would look
on a brand-new fridge.
388
00:13:40,985 --> 00:13:42,251
I hope there's one still left
389
00:13:42,286 --> 00:13:44,620
by the time I get to the
front of the line tomorrow.
390
00:13:44,828 --> 00:13:46,992
_
391
00:13:47,091 --> 00:13:48,023
Oh.
392
00:13:48,058 --> 00:13:49,525
Oh, I couldn't.
393
00:13:49,560 --> 00:13:51,226
I know you're not comfortable with it.
394
00:13:51,551 --> 00:13:53,124
_
395
00:13:53,282 --> 00:13:57,089
_
396
00:13:57,838 --> 00:13:59,928
Jessica, can I speak with you a moment?
397
00:14:00,044 --> 00:14:03,272
BERNARD: May I speak with you a moment.
398
00:14:03,749 --> 00:14:06,188
I can't take it anymore.
We have to get rid of him.
399
00:14:06,273 --> 00:14:09,043
Oh, come on, he's not that bad.
Not that bad?
400
00:14:09,079 --> 00:14:10,144
[AS BERNARD] Yum, yum, yum.
401
00:14:10,180 --> 00:14:11,951
Yum, yum, yum, yum, yum. Yum, yum.
402
00:14:12,056 --> 00:14:13,848
Okay,
what about your mother's happiness?
403
00:14:13,883 --> 00:14:15,416
I thought you said she was lonely.
404
00:14:15,452 --> 00:14:16,517
[NORMAL VOICE] Well, I was all for it
405
00:14:16,553 --> 00:14:17,885
until I realized it might be permanent.
406
00:14:17,921 --> 00:14:19,420
He called me his son.
407
00:14:19,456 --> 00:14:21,823
Can you imagine dealing
with that clown every day?
408
00:14:21,858 --> 00:14:23,891
Do you hear how selfish you sound?
409
00:14:23,927 --> 00:14:25,093
Who are you kidding?
410
00:14:25,128 --> 00:14:26,260
You're only putting up with him
411
00:14:26,296 --> 00:14:27,629
so you could use her wheelchair
412
00:14:27,664 --> 00:14:29,276
to jump the Black Friday line.
413
00:14:29,435 --> 00:14:30,698
Okay, fine!
414
00:14:30,734 --> 00:14:33,034
I admit that,
and I'm not gonna let you blow it
415
00:14:33,069 --> 00:14:36,304
just 'cause you can't handle a little...
416
00:14:36,764 --> 00:14:37,639
energy.
417
00:14:37,674 --> 00:14:39,307
[AS BERNARD] A-yum yum yum
yum yum yum yum yum yum yum...
418
00:14:39,342 --> 00:14:41,542
Stop it! Okay. Okay.
419
00:14:41,967 --> 00:14:44,478
We just have to suck it
up for a few more hours.
420
00:14:44,513 --> 00:14:47,615
Then I get my chair,
and your mother stays happy.
421
00:14:47,650 --> 00:14:49,416
[NORMAL VOICE] You're right.
You're right.
422
00:14:49,452 --> 00:14:51,452
Besides, she's gonna be over him
423
00:14:51,487 --> 00:14:52,886
as soon as she gets an
"A" in that class.
424
00:14:52,922 --> 00:14:55,089
I told you, the grade doesn't matter.
425
00:14:55,124 --> 00:14:57,725
Their diploma is a button that says
"Hooray!"
426
00:15:02,192 --> 00:15:03,923
Where's Bernard?
427
00:15:04,113 --> 00:15:05,666
Too much.
428
00:15:06,087 --> 00:15:07,234
Broke up.
429
00:15:07,270 --> 00:15:10,004
[CHUCKLING] Oh, thank the lord!
430
00:15:10,039 --> 00:15:11,572
I'm sorry, Mom, but you're better off.
431
00:15:11,607 --> 00:15:12,740
He was the worst.
432
00:15:12,775 --> 00:15:14,375
It's like, read the room, pal.
433
00:15:14,410 --> 00:15:15,896
You're annoying as hell.
434
00:15:15,944 --> 00:15:17,477
Okay, Louis, that's enough.
435
00:15:17,513 --> 00:15:19,112
You think three Murray
brothers is a lot?
436
00:15:19,148 --> 00:15:21,181
He was like 50 Murray
brothers rolled into one,
437
00:15:21,216 --> 00:15:22,516
with five Martin Shorts.
438
00:15:22,551 --> 00:15:24,151
Mom, you could do so much better.
439
00:15:24,186 --> 00:15:26,520
BERNARD: I believe she meant to say
440
00:15:26,555 --> 00:15:30,290
I "ate too much," and that I "threw up."
441
00:15:33,896 --> 00:15:37,998
I give this family... an "F."
442
00:15:39,845 --> 00:15:42,235
Sorry about your bathroom.
443
00:15:44,206 --> 00:15:46,840
[DOOR OPENS, CLOSES]
444
00:15:46,875 --> 00:15:48,341
Louis, how could you?
[TELEPHONE RINGING]
445
00:15:48,377 --> 00:15:50,944
Don't you care about your mother at all?
446
00:15:50,979 --> 00:15:54,381
Or is it just Louis,
Louis, Louis all the time?
447
00:15:54,416 --> 00:15:56,116
[ANSWERING MACHINE BEEPS]
448
00:15:56,151 --> 00:15:57,818
HONEY: [SLURRED] Hey, Jess-nuts!
449
00:15:57,853 --> 00:16:00,687
Just checkin' in to see if
you tricked Ol' Wheely Wheels
450
00:16:00,723 --> 00:16:04,257
to lend you her steel so we
can cut asses in line ma�ana,
451
00:16:04,293 --> 00:16:06,026
get you that new fridge!
452
00:16:06,061 --> 00:16:08,692
Let a bitch know, bitch!
Whoooo... [ANSWERING MACHINE BEEPS]
453
00:16:13,703 --> 00:16:15,269
MAN: Oh, there's another gust.
454
00:16:15,305 --> 00:16:18,606
Hey, Ma. We heated up some of
the delicious turkey you made.
455
00:16:18,641 --> 00:16:19,709
Want us to make you a plate?
456
00:16:19,773 --> 00:16:21,759
_
457
00:16:22,054 --> 00:16:24,376
_
458
00:16:24,480 --> 00:16:26,447
- She's still mad at us.
- Yep. Yep.
459
00:16:29,189 --> 00:16:31,018
Oh, Grandma, don't watch this part!
460
00:16:31,300 --> 00:16:34,645
_
461
00:16:34,825 --> 00:16:35,859
Why would you do that?
462
00:16:36,091 --> 00:16:38,498
_
463
00:16:38,878 --> 00:16:41,527
_
464
00:16:41,822 --> 00:16:43,818
_
465
00:16:43,892 --> 00:16:47,427
_
466
00:16:47,934 --> 00:16:49,686
Hmm. I'm always the balloon.
467
00:16:49,887 --> 00:16:52,113
Eddie and Emery tricked me
into seeing a scary movie.
468
00:16:52,230 --> 00:16:54,678
_
469
00:16:54,762 --> 00:16:57,242
_
470
00:16:57,945 --> 00:16:58,963
Is that from "Batman"?
471
00:16:59,047 --> 00:17:00,630
_
472
00:17:00,757 --> 00:17:02,118
_
473
00:17:05,448 --> 00:17:08,015
Even leftovers don't taste good.
474
00:17:08,050 --> 00:17:10,117
Well, just put them in that dull,
tiny fridge
475
00:17:10,152 --> 00:17:12,720
with no crisper that we're
stuck with until next year.
476
00:17:12,755 --> 00:17:15,255
None of this would have happened
if my mom had learned her verbs.
477
00:17:15,291 --> 00:17:17,624
I don't blame her, anyway.
I blame Honey.
478
00:17:17,837 --> 00:17:18,959
That drunk.
479
00:17:18,994 --> 00:17:21,528
Sad. Drinking that much on Thanksgiving.
480
00:17:21,564 --> 00:17:22,930
[BOTTLE CLATTERS]
481
00:17:22,965 --> 00:17:24,465
[SNORING]
482
00:17:25,290 --> 00:17:27,179
One of us should apologize to my mom.
483
00:17:27,338 --> 00:17:28,068
Yeah.
484
00:17:28,404 --> 00:17:31,454
And it should be the person
who is really at fault...
485
00:17:31,665 --> 00:17:33,048
You.
486
00:17:34,789 --> 00:17:36,518
What are you doing? Holding up a mirror.
487
00:17:36,603 --> 00:17:37,844
Do you see yourself?
488
00:17:37,879 --> 00:17:39,445
You took advantage of
a woman's happiness
489
00:17:39,481 --> 00:17:40,880
so you could use her wheelchair.
490
00:17:40,916 --> 00:17:42,081
Well, what about you?
491
00:17:42,117 --> 00:17:44,117
Every second with the love connections,
492
00:17:44,152 --> 00:17:47,654
always trying to be that chubby
baby fatso with the wings.
493
00:17:47,689 --> 00:17:49,489
- Cupid.
- If you hadn't meddled,
494
00:17:49,524 --> 00:17:50,890
we wouldn't have hosted Thanksgiving
495
00:17:50,926 --> 00:17:52,425
and everything would be fine!
496
00:17:52,460 --> 00:17:54,794
At least I wasn't doing it
for selfish reasons like you.
497
00:17:54,829 --> 00:17:55,962
I was trying to be nice.
498
00:17:55,997 --> 00:17:58,218
My mom was lonely,
and I wanted to help her.
499
00:17:58,324 --> 00:18:00,666
No one is lonely, Louis.
500
00:18:00,701 --> 00:18:02,301
That's not a real thing.
501
00:18:02,336 --> 00:18:05,504
I'm telling you,
she was just doing it for the grade.
502
00:18:05,540 --> 00:18:08,040
And if it weren't for you,
I'd have a new fridge...
503
00:18:10,684 --> 00:18:12,178
What is it?
504
00:18:14,779 --> 00:18:18,087
Hmm? Oh, you're into my socks, girl?
505
00:18:18,308 --> 00:18:19,079
Thank you.
506
00:18:19,163 --> 00:18:20,219
Yeah,
I would like to come back to your house
507
00:18:20,254 --> 00:18:21,987
for some hot chocolate
and light kissing.
508
00:18:22,023 --> 00:18:23,055
[CHUCKLES]
509
00:18:23,311 --> 00:18:25,105
Do you feel a little
bad going ice skating
510
00:18:25,159 --> 00:18:26,591
after what we did to Evan?
511
00:18:26,627 --> 00:18:27,692
No.
512
00:18:27,728 --> 00:18:30,061
Ah, just who I was looking for.
513
00:18:30,097 --> 00:18:32,731
You two are taking me to
the Teacher Supply Store.
514
00:18:32,766 --> 00:18:34,766
No way! We're just about to go skating.
515
00:18:34,802 --> 00:18:38,236
If you refuse, I'll tell Mom
you took me to an R-rated movie.
516
00:18:38,272 --> 00:18:40,734
Are you blackmailing us?
517
00:18:40,841 --> 00:18:43,975
If putting a label on it helps
you swallow it, then sure.
518
00:18:44,010 --> 00:18:46,044
Sometimes you're the knife.
Sometimes you're the balloon.
519
00:18:46,079 --> 00:18:47,779
Now, chop chop, you balloons.
520
00:18:47,814 --> 00:18:48,880
Mom will never believe you.
521
00:18:48,915 --> 00:18:50,148
It's two against one,
522
00:18:50,183 --> 00:18:52,050
our word versus yours.
523
00:18:52,085 --> 00:18:53,885
Versus this ticket stub.
524
00:18:55,155 --> 00:18:57,121
Still think scrapbooking is a joke?
525
00:18:59,559 --> 00:19:01,759
[KNOCK ON DOOR, DOOR OPENS]
526
00:19:03,022 --> 00:19:04,447
Got a sec?
527
00:19:04,669 --> 00:19:06,431
[DOOR CLOSES]
528
00:19:06,906 --> 00:19:09,534
I thought you hated the
way I painted your nails.
529
00:19:10,269 --> 00:19:12,085
_
530
00:19:13,224 --> 00:19:15,546
I saw your homework assignment.
531
00:19:15,810 --> 00:19:18,037
"My favorite hobby is...
532
00:19:18,090 --> 00:19:20,454
doing nails with Jessica."
533
00:19:20,644 --> 00:19:22,449
_
534
00:19:24,592 --> 00:19:27,272
_
535
00:19:27,519 --> 00:19:29,887
But we're not even
friendly with each other.
536
00:19:29,922 --> 00:19:32,089
You don't even look at
me when I do your nails.
537
00:19:32,248 --> 00:19:35,910
_
538
00:19:37,113 --> 00:19:42,431
_
539
00:19:42,969 --> 00:19:46,673
_
540
00:19:46,811 --> 00:19:48,939
Always crying during sports.
541
00:19:49,175 --> 00:19:51,613
_
542
00:19:51,707 --> 00:19:55,074
_
543
00:19:56,362 --> 00:19:58,248
I'm sorry I told you I liked Bernard
544
00:19:58,284 --> 00:20:00,647
so I could use your wheelchair.
545
00:20:00,942 --> 00:20:02,719
I hope we didn't mess
things up with him.
546
00:20:03,023 --> 00:20:06,780
_
547
00:20:07,097 --> 00:20:08,025
[LAUGHS] I knew it!
548
00:20:08,060 --> 00:20:08,690
[SIGHS]
549
00:20:08,775 --> 00:20:10,305
_
550
00:20:10,506 --> 00:20:12,342
_
551
00:20:12,402 --> 00:20:14,302
_
552
00:20:14,418 --> 00:20:16,199
[BOTH CHUCKLE]
553
00:20:19,871 --> 00:20:20,937
I know it's late,
554
00:20:20,972 --> 00:20:23,540
but do you want to go shopping with me?
555
00:20:23,575 --> 00:20:26,209
All the good sales are over,
but who knows...
556
00:20:26,244 --> 00:20:28,578
We might see somebody get trampled.
557
00:20:28,830 --> 00:20:30,747
I'd like that.
558
00:20:34,656 --> 00:20:35,659
Hey.
559
00:20:35,817 --> 00:20:37,784
I'm ready for Black Friday!
560
00:20:37,819 --> 00:20:41,221
I just...
I needed a little hair of the dog.
561
00:20:41,256 --> 00:20:43,023
Here.
562
00:20:43,058 --> 00:20:44,691
Mm.
563
00:20:46,328 --> 00:20:49,429
Hey, so did I come over yesterday?
564
00:20:49,464 --> 00:20:50,530
Were we all together?
565
00:20:50,565 --> 00:20:53,166
'Cause things are a bit hazy.
566
00:20:53,201 --> 00:20:55,635
At some point, I think I made nachos.
567
00:20:55,671 --> 00:20:59,272
And I also recall doing a load
of laundry in my underwear.
568
00:20:59,308 --> 00:21:02,375
And then I think I tried
to go for a run, and...
569
00:21:02,411 --> 00:21:03,376
Sure did.
570
00:21:03,412 --> 00:21:05,278
Ooh! Ooh!
571
00:21:05,314 --> 00:21:09,115
And then I woke up in bed under
the covers with my shoes on.
572
00:21:09,151 --> 00:21:11,017
And my hair was wet for some reason.
573
00:21:11,053 --> 00:21:12,585
And Marvin's not talking to me,
574
00:21:12,621 --> 00:21:14,654
which isn't a great sign.
575
00:21:15,602 --> 00:21:17,624
Yeah, so...
576
00:21:17,659 --> 00:21:19,993
did we hang out at all?
577
00:21:20,028 --> 00:21:21,397
[GULPING]
578
00:21:21,682 --> 00:21:23,392
sync and corrected by ninh
www.addic7ed.com
579
00:21:23,442 --> 00:21:27,992
Repair and Synchronization by
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