Original subtitles

- DAMN! I CAN'T BELIEVE LAVERNE ELOPED.

- THANK GOD! - WHAT?

- MY EARS.

THEY POPPED. I CAN HEAR AGAIN.

I CAN'T BELIEVE LAVERNE ELOPED.

- HOW COULD SHE DO SUCH A THING?

- WELL THAT AIN'T NO BIG MYSTERY.

LAVERNE SAID SHE WANTED A SMALL WEDDING.

BUT YOU HAD TO HAVE IT YOUR WAY.

WHAT SCARLETT WANTS, SCARLETT GETS.

NOW AIN'T THAT SO? - YES. IT IS.

- JUST CHECKIN'. UH, CAN I GO NOW?

- I'LL GO WITH YOU.

I'VE GOT 200 WEDDIN' GUESTS TO UNINVITE.

OH, BY THE WAY DOCTOR, IN ALL THE CONFUSION,

I FORGOT TO GIVE YOU THIS MESSAGE.

YOU GOT AN OFFER ON YOUR HOUSE.

- OH, LET ME SEE, LET ME SEE!

WOW!

DAMN, HARRY! YOU JUST GOT A LOT BETTER-LOOKING.

- JUST GIVE ME-- COME ON, JUST GIVE ME THAT!

WHOA! BOY, THIS IS GREAT.

LOOKS LIKE I'M SELLING THE HOUSE.

- IF I WERE YOU, I'D HIT HIM UP FOR A NICE BIG WEDDING.

- HONEY, WHATEVER YOU WANT. BUT WE REALLY SHOULD GET HOME

BEFORE THIS GUY CHANGES HIS MIND.

- HEY, YOU'RE NOT GOING ANYWHERE.

I SAW THE WEATHER FORECAST ON THE LOCAL MORNING SHOW.

THIS STORM'S GONNA BE AROUND FOR A WHILE...

AT LEAST ACCORDING TO REGIS AND CATFISH.

- REGIS AND CATFISH.

THEY SOUND LIKE SUCH A HAPPY COUPLE.

- OH, GOD. CAROL...WHAT'S THE MATTER?

- KEVIN AND I BROKE UP.

- OH! WHAT?

- WELL AFTER I ACCEPTED KEVIN'S MARRIAGE PROPOSAL,

I BEGAN TO CONSIDER THE BIG PICTURE.

- OH, GOD, NO, NOT THE BIG PICTURE!

- DADDY, I JUST WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT...

NO MATTER HOW BROKENHEARTED, BEREFT,

OR ABANDONED I MAY FEEL,

I GIVE YOU MY FULL PERMISSION

TO LEAVE ME BEHIND AND MOVE TO VERMONT.

- GOOD, BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M GONNA DO.

COME ON, YOU'RE AN INTELLIGENT, CAPABLE YOUNG LADY.

YOU'RE READY TO STAND ON YOUR OWN TWO FEET.

YOU'RE GONNA DO JUST FINE.

- RIGHT.

THANKS FOR THAT VOTE OF CONFIDENCE.

I FEEL LIBERATED. I FEEL EMPOWERED.

- THERE YOU GO. THAT'S MY GIRL!

- I FEEL LIKE YOU'RE A VERY BAD DADDY.

- LIFE GOES ON, AND SO DO WE

JUST WHY WE DO IT IS NO MYSTERY

ONE BY ONE

WE FILL THE DAYS

WE FIND A THOUSAND DIFFERENT WAYS

SOMETIMES THE ANSWER CAN BE HARD TO FIND

THAT'S SOMETHING I WILL NEVER BE

I'M ALWAYS HERE

FOR ANYTHING YOU NEED

RAIN OR SHINE, I'LL BE THE ONE

TO SHARE IT ALL AS LIFE GOES ON

WE SHARE IT ALL

AS LIFE GOES ON

- STOPPED RAINING.

- DANG IT, HARRY! WE WAS PLAYIN' "THROW CARDS IN A HAT,"

NOT "TALK AND THROW CARDS AT A HAT"!

JABBER, JABBER, JABBER! THAT'S ALL THE MAN DOES!

- WELL, I JUST CANCELED ALL THE ARRANGEMENTS.

WE MIGHT AS WELL START EATIN' UP THE WEDDIN' CAKE.

OH, I CAN JUST IMAGINE LAVERNE

GETTIN' A PIECE OF THIS...

[sobbing] SQUISHED IN HER LITTLE FACE!

- COME ON, DEAR, COME ON. TRY NOT TO BE SAD.

IT'S TURNED OUT TO BE A BEAUTIFUL DAY.

THE SUN IS SHINING... AND THAT MEANS

THE AIRPORT IS OPEN, AND I CAN GO HOME.

EXCUSE ME.

- HEY HARRY, YOU WANNA COME WITH US?

I THOUGHT I'D CHEER CAROL UP AND SHOW HER,

SOME OF THE HOT SPOTS OF HICKORY.

- NO, I REALLY NEED TO SEE ABOUT A FLIGHT OUT OF HERE.

- OH, COME ON HARRY, YOU CAN'T LEAVE HICKORY

BEFORE YOU GO DOWN TO ELMO'S BAIT & TACKLE!

- WHY NOT?

- BECAUSE IF YOU GUESS HOW MANY

NIGHTCRAWLERS HE HAS IN HIS JAR,

HE LETS YOU RUN OVER STUFF IN HIS MONSTER TRUCK.

GOD, I LOVE THIS TOWN!

- OH, LOOK! LOOK AT LAVERNE'S WEDDING CAKE.

SEE THE LITTLE BRIDE AND GROOM

WITH THEIR SILLY LITTLE PAINTED ON SMILES?

THEY STAND THERE BLYFRY HAND IN HAND

ABOUT TO STEP INTO THAT ABYSS WE CALL MARRIAGE.

OH, FOOLISH, FOOLISH FIGURINES!

- CAROL, HONEY, YOU NEED TO GO COUNT SOME WORMS.

[doorbell rings]

- I'LL GET IT!

- OH LORD, I FORGOT TO CANCEL THE BAND!

- HI. - THE WEDDIN'S OFF.

SO YOU GO PLAY YOUR HOKEY POKEY SOMEPLACE ELSE.

- KEVIN!

WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?

- I HAD TO SEE YOU.

- YOU FLEW HERE ALL THE WAY FROM MIAMI JUST TO SEE ME?

- I STOLE A PLANE JUST TO SEE YOU.

- YOU STOLE A PLANE FOR ME?

THAT IS SO ROMANTIC.

- THAT'S ALSO A FELONY.

- KEVIN, I WAS WRONG. I WANNA GET MARRIED.

- REALLY? - YES, YES!

CALL ME FICKLE! CALL ME MERCURIAL! CALL ME CAPRICIOUS!

- CALL ME A CAB.

- HONEY, THIS IS GREAT! LET'S GO HOME AND GET MARRIED.

- Y'ALL DON'T HAVE TO GO ANYWHERE.

I'LL MARRY YOU RIGHT HERE!

- REALLY? KEVIN?

- LET'S DO IT!

- SCARLETT, FETCH ME MY MARRYIN' BOOK

AND MY GOOD SUSPENDERS.

- COME ON MAXINE, WE'RE GONNA HAVE A WEDDIN'!

- WHO GIVES THIS WOMAN AWAY?

- ME. YO, RIGHT HERE! I GOT IT!

- ALL RIGHT, THEN, HERE WE GO! - BUT FIRST...

MY BELOVED FAMILY AND FRIENDS, IF YOU'LL INDULGE ME,

I WOULD LIKE TO SHARE SOME DEEPLY PERSONAL THOUGHTS.

AM I THE LITTLE GIRL YOU CARRIED?

IS HE THE LITTLE BOY AT PLAY?

DO YOU REMEMBER GROWING OLDER?

WHEN DID THEY?

SUNRISE! SUNSET!

- HEY! - LAVERNE!

- WHAT'S GOIN' ON? - I'M GETTING MARRIED!

- OH! I'M SORRY, UH...

WE'LL TAKE A SEAT IN THE BACK.

- GREAT! WE'RE ALL HERE.

AS I WAS SAYING... SUNRISE--

- NICE OF YOU TO SHOW UP AT CAROL'S WEDDIN'.

TOO BAD, I COULDN'T SHOW UP AT YOURS.

- MAMA, MATT AND I ARE STILL UNHITCHED.

- SO AM I. SUNRISE--

- SO, LAVERNE, YOU WANNA TELL YOUR MAMA

WHY WE AIN'T MARRIED YET?

- WELL, YOU KNOW, UM...

[mumbling] I DIDN'T WANNA GET MARRIED WITHOUT MY MAMA.

- WHAT?

HONESTLY, LAVERNE, THE WAY YOU MUMBLE.

AND AFTER ALL THOSE ELOCUTION LESSONS.

- ELOCUTION LESSONS?

- SCARLETT, YOUR DAUGHTER JUST SAID SHE COULDN'T GET MARRIED

WITHOUT HER MAMA.

- LAVERNE? OH!

- OH, MAMA!

- SO ARE WE GONNA HAVE A WEDDING OR WHAT?

- WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT! I GOT AN IDEA!

WHY DON'T Y'ALL HAVE A DOUBLE WEDDIN'!?

DID I JUST SAY "Y'ALL"?

I GOTTA GET OUT OF HERE!

- A DOUBLE WEDDIN'? WHY THAT'S A GREAT IDEA! CAROL?

- YEAH, GREAT, ANYTHING, COME ON, LET'S GO...

- MAMA, JUST ONE MORE THING.

MAY I PLEASE WEAR YOUR WEDDING DRESS?

- OH, DARLING! - OH, MAMA, I LOVE YOU!

- I LOVE YOU, BABY!

- I LOVE YOU, HARRY!

SORRY.

I JUST GOT CAUGHT UP IN THE MOMENT.

- ALL RIGHT, THEN. LAVERNE AND MATT...

CAROL AND KEVIN...

Y'ALL TAKE EACH OTHER TO HAVE AND TO HOLD,

FOR BETTER, FOR WORSE, FOR...

OH, WELL WHAT THE HECK.

MOST OF YOU'VE BEEN MARRIED BEFORE, YOU KNOW THE DRILL.

SO, DO YOU?

- I DO. - I DO.

- I DO. - I DO.

- OKAY, THEN.

BY THE POWER VESTED IN ME BY THE STATE OF ARKANSAS,

AND THE GREATER DARDANELLE COUNTY BUICK DEALERS...

I PRONOUNCE YOU HITCHED!

GENTLEMEN, KISS YOUR BRIDES.

- SEE? I TOLD YOU WE'D MAKE IT!

- LET THE WEDDING BEGIN.

- SO WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU GUYS?

- THE ROAD WASHED OUT, SO WE SAT IN A MOTEL AND WATCHED CABLE.

- THAT'S NOT ALL WE DID.

WE GOT SCHNOCKERED OFF THE MINI-BAR.

- THE MANAGER TAUGHT ME THIS REALLY COOL GAME:

"THROW CARDS IN A HAT."

- PARDONEZ-MOI!

DID YOU SAY "THROW CARDS IN A HAT"?

- WELL, LAVERNE. UM...

I'M NOT, UH,

REAL GOOD AT THIS, BUT, UM...

OH, HELL, I'M GONNA MISS YOU.

'CAUSE NEXT TO ME,

YOU'RE THE BIGGEST PAIN IN THE ASS KNOW.

- OH, DOCTOR, BACK AT YA!

- THANKS AGAIN FOR COMIN' OUT FOR THE WEDDIN'.

REALLY MEANS A LOT TO LAVERNE.

- YEAH, YEAH, ME TOO.

SO LET ME GET THIS STRAIGHT.

YOU MARRIED HER AND SHE'S GONNA BE THE NURSE IN YOUR OFFICE?

- YEAH. WE'RE GONNA BE TOGETHER NIGHT AND DAY.

- YOU ARE A VERY BRAVE MAN.

- YOU KNOW DOCTOR, YOU GONNA DO FINE IN VERMONT.

YOU JUST REMEMBER TO BUNDLE UP.

NOW YOU KNOW HOW YOUR ARTHRITIS ACTS UP.

DON'T TRY TO BE A HERO OUT THERE SHOVELIN' YOUR DRIVEWAY.

THAT TRICK BACK OF YOURN!

DOCTOR, YOU RECKON YOU'RE GONNA BE ALL RIGHT WITHOUT ME?

- IT WON'T BE EASY.

OH, LAVERNE... - DOCTOR...

WE HAVE HAD A LONG, PRODUCTIVE,

PROFESSIONAL RELATIONSHIP.

AND THEY IS JUST NO REASON FOR YOU TO GET WEEPY ON ME!

- OH, JUST--COME HERE. - [crying]

- OKAY EVERYBODY, IT'S BOUQUET-THROWING TIME!

ASSEMBLE ALL YE SINGLE WOMEN!

- I GUESS IT'S JUST YOU AND ME, SHAQUILLE.

- READY?

- DANG IT! IT'S NOT "THROW FLOWERS IN A HAT"!

CAN'T THESE PEOPLE GET ANYTHING RIGHT?

- AFTER ALL THIS STUFF YOU'VE TAKEN, I WONDER WHY

I NEVER GAVE YOU A GOOD TROUNCING!

- BECAUSE YOU KNEW I'D KICK YOUR BUTT.

- HONESTLY, BARBARA, YOU'RE HOME 15 MINUTES

AND WE'RE ALREADY BICKERING.

- THERE'S NO PLACE LIKE HOME.

- I'VE MISSED YOU SO MUCH!

I WISH YOU COULD'VE BEEN AT MY WEDDING.

- THERE'LL BE ANOTHER ONE.

CAROL, I'M KIDDING!

KEVIN IS A GREAT GUY AND YOU SEEM SO HAPPY.

- OH, BARBIE-BARB!

- WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH MR. FOGGITY?

- HE'S GOING TO MY NEW ABODE

WITH THE REST OF MY FURRY CONFIDANTS.

- I DON'T THINK SO!

HE WAS MY PRESENT IN THIRD GRADE, REMEMBER?

TO TAKE MY MIND OFF THOSE UGLY BRACES.

- YOU NEVER HAD BRACES. I DID!

- I KNOW. THEY SCARED THE HELL OUT OF ME...

TIN GRIN!

- I'M RUBBER AND YOU'RE GLUE

AND MR. FOGGITY'S NOT GOING WITH YOU!

- SAYS YOU! - BARBARA, GIVE IT TO ME!

- IT'S MINE!

- WHOA! LOOK AT THIS MESS!

- YEAH, CAROL, CLEAN UP YOUR MONKEY!

HI, DADDY! - HEY, BABY.

BARBARA. OH, YEAH! IT'S SO GOOD TO SEE YOU!

- HI, DADDY. - HI, SWEETHEART.

- THIS IS JUST LIKE OLD TIMES. - YEAH, IF ONLY EMILY WERE HERE.

- ALTHOUGH I DON'T THINK SHE'D BE TOO HAPPY

ABOUT WHAT YOU DID TO HER MONKEY.

- OH, THAT'S RIGHT! IN THIRD GRADE YOU GAVE ME...

DUCKY! - DADDY!

- ALL RIGHT, THAT'S IT! YOU WANNA GO TO YOUR ROOMS?

- EMPTY THOUGH THEY MAY BE.

[duck quacks]

SOMEHOW I ALWAYS THOUGHT IT WOULD BE MY ROOM FOREVER.

- AND YOU ALMOST MADE THAT HAPPEN, DEAR.

- DADDY, WERE YOU PLANNING ON TAKING

THE PASTA MAKER TO VERMONT?

- YEAH, WELL I WAS THINKING-- - DIBS!

- WHAT A NUT!

- OH, IT IS SO GOOD TO SEE YOU!

- YOU TOO. - AH! OOH!

SO, EVERYTHING IN TUCSON OKAY? - OH, YEAH.

JOB'S GREAT. WEATHER'S PERFECT. I MEAN, DADDY IT'S NOT HOME,

BUT NOTHING'S GONNA BE LIKE THIS PLACE.

- YEAH I KNOW.

BUT YOU'LL COME VISIT ME IN VERMONT, RIGHT?

- YEAH! I WAS GONNA COME UP FOR CHRISTMAS.

IT'S NOT GONNA BE LIKE OUR OLD CHRISTMASES.

IT'S GONNA BE KINDA WEIRD WITH ALL THOSE PINE TREES AND SNOW.

- BARBARA, I JUST TOOK INVENTORY

AND I AM ONE TROLL SHORT!

- AT LEAST.

SO SEX WITH THIS GUY KEVIN MUST BE PRETTY LOUSY, HUH?

- BARBARA, WHAT WOULD MAKE YOU SAY A THING LIKE THAT?

- BECAUSE IF I WERE A NEWLYWED,

I WOULDN'T BE HERE PACKING BOXES.

- WELL, IF YOU MUST KNOW,

I HAD HIM UP ALL NIGHT LAST NIGHT.

- ENOUGH OF THAT, HEY! THAT'S ENOUGH.

- THAT'S JUST WHAT HE SAID!

- HEY. FROM NOW ON, WE PACK IN SILENCE.

[floorboard creaks]

TSK!

I FORGOT ABOUT THIS. - WHAT, DADDY?

- THIS CREAKY FLOORBOARD USED TO DRIVE YOUR MOTHER NUTS.

[floorboard creaks]

- THAT'S FUNNY, I NEVER NOTICED IT BEFORE.

- YEAH, I PROMISED LIBBY THAT ONE DAY I WOULD FIX IT

BUT YOU KNOW, SOME THINGS JUST NEVER GET DONE.

PLUS IT WAS A GREAT WAY TO CATCH YOU GUYS

WHEN YOU SNUCK IN LATE.

- SO THAT'S HOW YOU KNEW. - YEAH, YEAH...

THAT AND CAROL YELLING, "MOMMY, DADDY, BARBARA'S HOME!"

- WE HAD SO MANY HAPPY TIMES IN THIS HOUSE.

- YEAH, WE SURE DID.

[floorboard creaks]

- I CAN'T DO THIS.

- WHAT?

- I CAN'T SAY GOODBYE TO THIS PLACE.

- DADDY...

- KIDS, IT'S JUST FILLED WITH US.

EVERYWHERE I LOOK, I SEE YOU KIDS KINDA PLAYING

ON THE FLOOR, AND YOUR MOTHER...

I STILL HEAR HER LAUGH.

MY LIFE IS HERE.

I'M NOT GOING ANYWHERE.

- ME NEITHER!

- UH, CAROL, YOU'RE MARRIED, REMEMBER?

- SHUT UP!

- DADDY, YOU'RE SERIOUS? YOU'RE NOT GONNA GO TO VERMONT?

- CAN'T. NO.

I'M STAYING HOME.

- OH, HARRY, I KNEW YOU WOULDN'T LEAVE ME!

- CHARLEY, CHARLEY... YOU I COULD LEAVE.

- I CAME ALL THIS WAY TO PACK MY STUFF

AND YOU'RE NOT GOING ANYWHERE?

- I'M SORRY.

- I'M NOT! - OH, GET OVER HERE!

OH! - GROUP HUG!

- WHAT'S THE MATTER?

YOU COULDN'T SLEEP EITHER, KIDDO, HUH?

OF COURSE NOT, YOU SLEEP ALL DAY LONG.

WELL, DREYFIE, IT LOOKS LIKE IT'S JUST YOU AND ME AGAIN.

NOW THAT EVERYBODY'S GONE,

WE HAVE THE WHOLE HOUSE TO OURSELVES.

PLUS THERE'S AN EXTRA SPOT IN THE GARAGE.

HEY, DREYF, YOU WANT A CAR?

COME ON, HERE.

WHAT DO YOU WANNA EAT?

[floorboard creaks]

DID YOU HEAR THAT?

[floorboard creaks]

STRANGE.

[floorboard creaks]

[chuckling] OH, THE FLOOR.

ALL RIGHT, LIBBY DEAR, NOW THAT I'M STAYING,

I PROMISE YOU, I WILL FIX THIS.

MAYBE NOT TODAY... MAYBE NOT TOMORROW...

- MAYBE NOT THE NEXT DAY.

HI, HONEY, I'M HOME.

- OKAY, HARRY, LET'S GO UPSTAIRS.

WE'LL WAKE UP. LET'S GO, COME ON.

- HARRY, YOU'RE NOT DREAMING.

- THEN WHAT IS--

- DON'T MAKE, ME EXPLAIN IT, HONEY.

JUST SIT DOWN.

- WOW, LIBBY, YOU LOOK GREAT.

- I GET A LOT OF SUN.

YOU LOOK LIKE YOU'VE BEEN TAKING CARE OF YOURSELF.

- WELL I EXERCISE, I TRY TO WATCH WHAT I EAT...

WHAT AM I DOING? I'M TALKING TO LIBBY HERE!

- HARRY, YOU'RE THINKING TOO MUCH.

YOU ALWAYS DO THAT.

YOU AND CAROL.

- WHAT DO YOU MEAN, ME AND CAROL?

ME AND EMILY MAYBE, ME AND BARBARA, BUT ME AND CAROL?

- HARRY FACE IT, CAROL IS DEFINITELY YOUR GIRL.

- DON'T START. DON'T START, LIBBY.

YOU SPOILED HER.

- I SPOILED HER?

YOU BOUGHT HER EVERYTHING SHE EVER WHINED FOR!

HARRY, HOW MANY TIMES HAVE WE HAD THIS CONVERSATION?

- I WISH WE COULD HAVE IT A MILLION MORE.

- BE PATIENT, WE WILL.

NOW, HARRY, WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH YOU?

VERMONT LOOKS PERFECT FOR YOU.

- YOU KNOW ABOUT VERMONT?

- I KNOW ABOUT THE BASEBALL STRIKE.

HONEY, NOW WHY DON'T YOU GO?

- I CAN'T LEAVE. IT'D BE LIKE LEAVING YOU.

- I'M A MEMORY.

I'M NOT A PART OF THIS HOUSE, HARRY.

I'M IN YOUR HEART.

- WE LIVED OUR LIFE. WE RAISED OUR KIDS HERE.

- AND YOU'LL ALWAYS HAVE THAT.

HONEY, IT'S TIME TO MOVE ON.

I DID. [chuckling]

OH, BELIEVE ME, HARRY, LIFE IS SHORT.

- OH, JUST--JUST-- JUST HOW SHORT ARE WE TALKING?

- NUH-UH! THAT'S AGAINST THE RULES.

THAT'S JUST LIKE YOU-- ALWAYS WANTING

TO PEEK IN THE GIFTS BEFORE IT WAS CHRISTMAS.

- OH, SO YOU'RE SAYING THAT DEATH IS LIKE CHRISTMAS?

- MORE LIKE PRESIDENT'S DAY.

WHEN YOU GO, YOU GET TO MEET THEM.

- GOD...GOD, I MISS YOU!

- THEN TAKE ME TO VERMONT.

[Dreyfuss panting]

WELL, HEY THERE! THERE'S MY BIG GUY!

THANKS FOR LOOKING AFTER HARRY.

YOU'RE DOING A GREAT JOB.

- YEAH. COME OVER HERE, COME OVER HERE.

YEAH, SURE.

- OKAY, COME ON, Y'ALL, LET'S GET IT RIGHT THIS TIME.

WE ARE ALL HAPPY THE DOCTOR IS LEAVIN'.

YOU KNOW, I MEAN FOR HIM. SO SMILE.

SAY CHEESE, Y'ALL!

[everybody] - CHEESE, Y'ALL!

- OKAY BUDDY, THAT'S A WRAP!

- EXCUSE ME? EXCUSE ME?

HEY WARDROBE, CAN SOMEBODY GET ME OUTTA THIS DAMN SUIT?

ALL RIGHT, FORGET ABOUT IT, I'M OUTTA HERE!

- SEE YOU AROUND, STANLEY.

- YEAH, TAKE IT EASY, RICH.

Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0