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1
00:00:01,758 --> 00:00:03,035
Philip.
2
00:00:03,036 --> 00:00:04,908
Don't you just love the way it sounds?
3
00:00:04,909 --> 00:00:06,010
Philip!
4
00:00:07,376 --> 00:00:09,563
And how adorable is that accent?
5
00:00:10,380 --> 00:00:13,513
But to be honest, I only understand
half of what he says.
6
00:00:15,123 --> 00:00:17,462
Where's Danny? Has he seen this?
7
00:00:17,463 --> 00:00:19,396
No, but have you seen this?
8
00:00:19,397 --> 00:00:21,890
Meet the Rangers' newest icegirl.
9
00:00:21,891 --> 00:00:23,108
Ben: Oh, ho ho!
10
00:00:23,109 --> 00:00:24,801
She's got her hands up
high, her feet down low,
11
00:00:24,802 --> 00:00:26,293
and that's the
way she jig-a-lo...
12
00:00:26,294 --> 00:00:27,914
jig-a-lo
jig-a-lo!
13
00:00:27,915 --> 00:00:29,107
Jig-a-lo!
14
00:00:31,772 --> 00:00:33,435
Um, maybe it's just me.
15
00:00:33,436 --> 00:00:35,302
But isn't dressing Emma
up like a cheerleader
16
00:00:35,303 --> 00:00:36,935
just a little sexist?
17
00:00:36,936 --> 00:00:38,326
No, it's not just you.
18
00:00:39,219 --> 00:00:41,398
It's all the unpopular girls
who couldn't make cheerleading.
19
00:00:42,955 --> 00:00:45,307
Danny, take a look at this.
20
00:00:45,308 --> 00:00:47,271
Front page of the sports section.
21
00:00:47,272 --> 00:00:49,516
That Logan Parker is at it again.
22
00:00:49,517 --> 00:00:51,156
(Exhales) That dude hates me.
23
00:00:51,157 --> 00:00:53,021
He even criticized my Jersey.
24
00:00:53,022 --> 00:00:55,628
- We all wear the same ones!
- Yeah. Jerk!
25
00:00:56,105 --> 00:00:57,708
Well, we need him to start writing words
26
00:00:57,709 --> 00:01:00,215
like "awesome," "amazing,"
and "spectacular."
27
00:01:00,216 --> 00:01:02,470
Or the next contract
we negotiate is gonna be
28
00:01:02,471 --> 00:01:05,127
for you to sell shoes at
the big and tall store.
29
00:01:06,168 --> 00:01:07,705
What am I supposed to do about it?
30
00:01:07,706 --> 00:01:10,118
Here's a crazy idea. Play better?
31
00:01:10,936 --> 00:01:13,794
Come on! We need real ideas!
32
00:01:14,731 --> 00:01:16,752
Huh. Okay, you know what?
33
00:01:16,753 --> 00:01:18,130
Here's what we're gonna do.
34
00:01:18,131 --> 00:01:20,632
After practice today, we are gonna find him
35
00:01:20,633 --> 00:01:22,798
and we are gonna schmooze him.
36
00:01:22,799 --> 00:01:24,254
Okay? We just have to stop by my house
37
00:01:24,255 --> 00:01:25,606
and grab my cleavage. Okay? Let's go.
38
00:01:25,607 --> 00:01:26,941
Let's go. Come on.
39
00:01:28,450 --> 00:01:29,896
So, uh...
40
00:01:29,897 --> 00:01:32,204
I was thinking of bringing
Philip to Danny's game tomorrow.
41
00:01:32,205 --> 00:01:33,369
Oh, my God!
42
00:01:33,950 --> 00:01:36,094
Can we please go like two full sentences
43
00:01:36,095 --> 00:01:38,537
without mentioning lord stuffy pants?
44
00:01:39,468 --> 00:01:42,054
Whoa, okay. Hey, you're the
one who made the big speech
45
00:01:42,055 --> 00:01:44,657
after we broke up about how
we could still be friends.
46
00:01:44,658 --> 00:01:47,504
Well, if you can't be supportive
of my relationship with Philip,
47
00:01:47,505 --> 00:01:49,904
then I think this little
experiment might be over.
48
00:01:49,905 --> 00:01:51,553
Meaning that we get back together?
49
00:01:53,159 --> 00:01:55,466
I love it when I say the words here...
50
00:01:55,467 --> 00:01:58,725
And they mean something
totally different here.
51
00:02:01,663 --> 00:02:03,099
Fine.
52
00:02:03,711 --> 00:02:05,764
I will try and get to know Philip.
53
00:02:05,765 --> 00:02:06,944
Have him come by to the bar today.
54
00:02:06,945 --> 00:02:07,923
We can hang out during my break.
55
00:02:07,924 --> 00:02:10,105
Thank you for being so mature, Ben.
56
00:02:11,461 --> 00:02:12,935
His name is Phil and he's a bore,
57
00:02:12,936 --> 00:02:14,449
and that is why he makes us snore...
58
00:02:14,450 --> 00:02:17,532
Phil's a snore! Phil's a snore!
59
00:02:17,533 --> 00:02:19,144
(Laughs)
60
00:02:19,145 --> 00:02:20,552
(Theme music playing)
61
00:02:20,553 --> 00:02:23,601
It's amazing how the unexpected
62
00:02:23,602 --> 00:02:27,308
can take your life
and change direction.
63
00:02:27,309 --> 00:02:30,655
Synced and corrected by Nantinha
~ www.addic7ed.com ~
64
00:02:30,656 --> 00:02:32,618
Riley: Oh, I know, I
know. Tell them the story
65
00:02:32,619 --> 00:02:34,751
about how one of your students
mistook you for the TA
66
00:02:34,752 --> 00:02:37,340
and said she heard the
Professor was super hot.
67
00:02:37,341 --> 00:02:38,650
Well, actually...
68
00:02:39,256 --> 00:02:40,517
That was pretty much it.
69
00:02:42,537 --> 00:02:44,186
Oh, my God. I love that story.
70
00:02:44,187 --> 00:02:45,365
(Laughs)
71
00:02:46,398 --> 00:02:49,418
Oh my God, you know what
I love about this lunch?
72
00:02:51,184 --> 00:02:52,559
Nothing.
73
00:02:53,830 --> 00:02:55,206
Oh, hey, can I get a beer?
74
00:02:55,207 --> 00:02:57,900
Oh, give me a minute. We're
just a little short-staffed.
75
00:02:57,901 --> 00:03:01,194
Yeah, probably shouldn't take
my break during the lunch rush.
76
00:03:01,529 --> 00:03:03,225
Trouble you for a pint, love?
77
00:03:03,226 --> 00:03:04,796
Right away.
78
00:03:07,399 --> 00:03:08,825
Wait, did you see that?
79
00:03:08,826 --> 00:03:10,699
What does he have that I don't?
80
00:03:10,700 --> 00:03:12,223
Well, I could make you a list.
81
00:03:14,106 --> 00:03:16,041
But let's start with the accent.
82
00:03:16,042 --> 00:03:17,864
Wait, really? Girls like that?
83
00:03:17,865 --> 00:03:19,650
May I present you exhibit...
84
00:03:19,651 --> 00:03:21,949
(Female voice) "I love that story, ohh."
85
00:03:22,967 --> 00:03:24,776
Yeah yeah. Yeah.
86
00:03:25,090 --> 00:03:26,399
Well, in that case...
87
00:03:26,719 --> 00:03:28,782
(In British accent) Here we are, ladies!
(Laughs)
88
00:03:28,783 --> 00:03:31,401
All aboard the train for Tuckingham Palace.
89
00:03:34,016 --> 00:03:36,070
Uh, so, Ben...
90
00:03:36,071 --> 00:03:37,786
Philip had some really fun ideas
91
00:03:37,787 --> 00:03:39,225
for when the two of you hang out.
92
00:03:39,744 --> 00:03:41,481
I thought this was the hanging out.
93
00:03:43,473 --> 00:03:46,150
But once you start, who
wants to stop, right?
94
00:03:46,517 --> 00:03:49,495
Brilliant. I thought maybe you
could pop by the campus later
95
00:03:49,496 --> 00:03:50,802
and I could show you around.
96
00:03:50,803 --> 00:03:52,275
Pop by the campus?
97
00:03:52,276 --> 00:03:54,610
Well, that's almost too much fun.
98
00:03:54,611 --> 00:03:55,886
I'll be there.
99
00:03:56,764 --> 00:03:59,064
- (Mouthing)
- Yeah, okay.
100
00:04:00,443 --> 00:04:01,912
Okay, uh, now read this.
101
00:04:02,546 --> 00:04:05,856
"Caesar salad with a side of anchovies."
102
00:04:05,857 --> 00:04:06,976
See?
103
00:04:06,977 --> 00:04:09,613
I hate anchovies, but
that sounds delicious.
104
00:04:11,799 --> 00:04:13,071
(In British accent) Excuse me, barkeep,
105
00:04:13,072 --> 00:04:15,746
can I trouble you for a couple of pints?
106
00:04:15,747 --> 00:04:18,193
It's for my new lady friend.
(Chuckles)
107
00:04:18,876 --> 00:04:20,312
(Mouthing) Ben!
108
00:04:20,313 --> 00:04:22,033
(Normal voice) This
accent thing is amazing!
109
00:04:22,034 --> 00:04:24,248
You were right. You can
literally say anything,
110
00:04:24,249 --> 00:04:25,550
and women love it.
111
00:04:26,297 --> 00:04:27,988
(In British accent) Excuse
me, has anyone ever told you
112
00:04:27,989 --> 00:04:30,256
you've got an absolutely lovely bosom?
113
00:04:34,262 --> 00:04:37,162
(Normal voice) See? I just told
that girl she's got nice boobs,
114
00:04:37,163 --> 00:04:38,702
and I'm still standing here.
115
00:04:39,625 --> 00:04:41,125
(Laughs) Oh, try it, try it, try it.
116
00:04:42,128 --> 00:04:43,695
(In cockney accent) 'Ello, duckie!
117
00:04:47,276 --> 00:04:48,915
What are you having today?
118
00:04:52,474 --> 00:04:53,924
Bonnie: I'll go see if that idiot from The Post
119
00:04:53,925 --> 00:04:55,040
has checked in yet.
120
00:04:55,041 --> 00:04:57,380
You keep your eyes open, but do not engage.
121
00:04:58,222 --> 00:04:59,740
Danny! (Snaps fingers)
122
00:04:59,741 --> 00:05:02,113
Talk to no one. Got it?
123
00:05:02,114 --> 00:05:03,390
Got it.
124
00:05:04,114 --> 00:05:05,787
Well, hello.
125
00:05:06,707 --> 00:05:07,843
Hi, there.
126
00:05:07,844 --> 00:05:10,394
Are we finally sharing the
locker room with the ice girls?
127
00:05:10,395 --> 00:05:12,671
Because I put a request
in for that months ago.
128
00:05:12,672 --> 00:05:13,929
Oh, sorry to disappoint,
129
00:05:13,930 --> 00:05:15,715
but I am not one of your cheerleaders.
130
00:05:15,716 --> 00:05:16,950
Are you sure?
131
00:05:16,951 --> 00:05:18,740
Because I know I'm feeling inspired.
132
00:05:19,183 --> 00:05:21,505
Too bad you're not this
aggressive on the ice.
133
00:05:21,506 --> 00:05:23,847
Hey! I made some pretty good passes today.
134
00:05:23,848 --> 00:05:26,226
You're not counting this
as one of them, are you?
135
00:05:26,227 --> 00:05:27,954
(Exhales) Ouch!
136
00:05:27,955 --> 00:05:30,678
She takes me down, which
I'm totally okay with.
137
00:05:31,574 --> 00:05:33,228
All right, seriously?
138
00:05:33,229 --> 00:05:35,959
I cannot find that
talentless hack anywhere.
139
00:05:35,960 --> 00:05:37,866
Hey, do you know which
one of these jackasses
140
00:05:37,867 --> 00:05:39,504
is Logan Parker?
141
00:05:39,505 --> 00:05:42,625
Logan Parker, talentless
hack at your service.
142
00:05:42,626 --> 00:05:44,393
(Coughs, exhales)
143
00:05:44,394 --> 00:05:45,799
Hey!
144
00:05:46,109 --> 00:05:47,782
(Chuckles)
145
00:05:47,783 --> 00:05:49,378
I knew that, yeah.
146
00:05:49,379 --> 00:05:50,923
Gotcha! (Laughs)
147
00:05:50,924 --> 00:05:53,976
We just love hazing the
new reporters, you know?
148
00:05:53,977 --> 00:05:54,921
Wait wait.
149
00:05:54,922 --> 00:05:56,190
You're the dude that hates me?
150
00:05:56,191 --> 00:05:57,674
Well, you're half right.
151
00:05:57,675 --> 00:05:59,128
But this was fun!
152
00:05:59,517 --> 00:06:01,101
Enjoy tomorrow's column.
153
00:06:03,325 --> 00:06:04,744
Now look what you've done!
154
00:06:05,201 --> 00:06:06,516
Whoa.
155
00:06:08,476 --> 00:06:09,730
After you, ladies.
156
00:06:10,741 --> 00:06:12,285
Oh-ho-ho!
157
00:06:12,286 --> 00:06:14,859
Maybe this whole college thing
isn't the worst idea after all.
158
00:06:14,860 --> 00:06:16,953
It has its perks, but I'm
afraid you're a little late
159
00:06:16,954 --> 00:06:18,239
and I have to leave for a meeting.
160
00:06:18,240 --> 00:06:20,335
Oh, am I? Do you?
161
00:06:20,336 --> 00:06:21,733
Darn it!
162
00:06:22,446 --> 00:06:24,437
Well, I guess I'll just take off then.
163
00:06:24,438 --> 00:06:26,365
But don't forget to tell
Riley that I came by...
164
00:06:27,079 --> 00:06:28,780
Because I did.
165
00:06:28,781 --> 00:06:29,968
Actually, I won't be long.
166
00:06:29,969 --> 00:06:32,119
And the rest of my evening
is completely clear.
167
00:06:32,120 --> 00:06:33,922
(Chuckles) Of course it is.
168
00:06:34,534 --> 00:06:36,421
All right, I'm off. Make yourself at home.
169
00:06:41,928 --> 00:06:42,994
(Clears throat)
170
00:06:44,289 --> 00:06:46,164
(Mocking Philip) Hello, Philip here.
171
00:06:46,165 --> 00:06:47,649
Can I get someone to come down here
172
00:06:47,650 --> 00:06:49,687
and pull the stick out of me arse?
173
00:06:50,388 --> 00:06:51,488
(Knocks on door)
174
00:06:51,489 --> 00:06:52,588
Professor Farlow, are you busy?
175
00:06:52,589 --> 00:06:53,807
No no no, I'm not...
176
00:06:54,437 --> 00:06:56,060
(In British accent) ... Busy at all.
177
00:06:56,852 --> 00:06:58,423
What can I do for you, love?
178
00:06:58,424 --> 00:07:00,413
I was hoping to audit
your art history seminar.
179
00:07:00,414 --> 00:07:01,830
I brought the form.
180
00:07:01,831 --> 00:07:03,880
Oh, you can audit me anytime.
181
00:07:04,656 --> 00:07:05,648
Excuse me?
182
00:07:05,649 --> 00:07:07,673
Why don't we discuss
it further over a pint?
183
00:07:08,251 --> 00:07:11,277
I may need to give you an entrance exam.
184
00:07:14,203 --> 00:07:15,614
(Ringing)
185
00:07:18,068 --> 00:07:19,720
- Hello?
- Danny?
186
00:07:19,721 --> 00:07:21,127
Where did you go?
187
00:07:21,128 --> 00:07:23,240
I'm home. I always nap after practice.
188
00:07:23,241 --> 00:07:25,541
Okay, I turn my head for like two...
189
00:07:27,903 --> 00:07:30,619
Three seconds, and you disappear.
190
00:07:30,620 --> 00:07:33,200
You were supposed to try and talk to Logan.
191
00:07:33,201 --> 00:07:35,149
- Oh, I did.
- (Gasps) You did?
192
00:07:35,150 --> 00:07:37,378
Okay, that... that's
great. So, how'd it go?
193
00:07:40,460 --> 00:07:42,896
Not exactly how I thought it would.
194
00:07:44,193 --> 00:07:46,959
- (Both laughing)
- That's so good!
195
00:07:46,960 --> 00:07:49,565
Oh, my God. You guys are never
going to believe what happened.
196
00:07:49,566 --> 00:07:52,084
I had a good time with Phil. No,
I know, I don't believe it either.
197
00:07:52,730 --> 00:07:55,895
No, apparently some woman asked
to audit Philip's class yesterday,
198
00:07:55,896 --> 00:07:57,680
and claims he totally hit on her.
199
00:07:57,681 --> 00:07:59,432
What?! How could she?
200
00:07:59,433 --> 00:08:01,217
He! How could he?!
201
00:08:02,345 --> 00:08:05,659
He's been called before the Dean
and accused of sexual harassment.
202
00:08:05,660 --> 00:08:08,943
Harassment?! That's a pretty strong
word for a little innocent flirting.
203
00:08:09,359 --> 00:08:10,834
I'm assuming.
204
00:08:11,629 --> 00:08:14,062
You know, the brits actually pronounce it
205
00:08:14,063 --> 00:08:16,096
"harrisment." (Laughs)
206
00:08:16,398 --> 00:08:19,382
Truly, they can make anything sound classy.
207
00:08:19,383 --> 00:08:21,207
(In British accent) My bum itches.
208
00:08:21,208 --> 00:08:23,098
Fancy a scratch? (Laughing)
209
00:08:23,917 --> 00:08:25,912
Tucker, this is serious.
210
00:08:25,913 --> 00:08:28,964
- They're probably going to fire him.
- Fire him?!
211
00:08:28,965 --> 00:08:31,102
Is that really fair? Maybe
it's just a misunderstanding.
212
00:08:31,103 --> 00:08:32,816
God, I just... I should have known.
213
00:08:32,817 --> 00:08:34,013
It was too good to be true.
214
00:08:34,014 --> 00:08:36,773
Why is it that every time
I fall for the perfect guy
215
00:08:36,774 --> 00:08:39,573
he turns out to be just the perfect jerk?
216
00:08:40,167 --> 00:08:41,542
No offense.
217
00:08:41,919 --> 00:08:44,194
But there are two sides to every story.
218
00:08:44,195 --> 00:08:45,809
Sometimes even three.
219
00:08:46,634 --> 00:08:48,426
(Normal voice) No. Oh, hell nah.
220
00:08:48,427 --> 00:08:50,297
Look, nah.
221
00:08:50,298 --> 00:08:52,935
Listen, I say where
there's smoke, there's fire.
222
00:08:52,936 --> 00:08:54,706
Which means, girl, get
your ass out that building
223
00:08:54,707 --> 00:08:56,274
before you get burned.
224
00:08:59,069 --> 00:09:00,442
See? See?
225
00:09:00,443 --> 00:09:01,852
Thank you. Tucker gets it.
226
00:09:01,853 --> 00:09:05,271
But... but aren't you the one who's
always saying innocent until proven guilty?
227
00:09:05,272 --> 00:09:07,273
No. Why would I...
228
00:09:07,274 --> 00:09:09,125
Oh, lawyer. Right.
229
00:09:09,750 --> 00:09:11,709
Well, he did deny everything.
230
00:09:11,710 --> 00:09:13,278
- See?
- Uh-uh, he lyin'.
231
00:09:14,888 --> 00:09:16,529
You're right. Of course.
Of course he's lying.
232
00:09:16,970 --> 00:09:20,353
Or perhaps you're turning your
back on a man wrongfully accused.
233
00:09:20,758 --> 00:09:23,566
Riley, you have to trust your heart
234
00:09:23,567 --> 00:09:25,444
and give him the benefit of the doubt.
235
00:09:26,945 --> 00:09:28,984
You're right. (Exhales)
236
00:09:28,985 --> 00:09:30,297
Thanks, Ben.
237
00:09:30,298 --> 00:09:32,226
You really are a good friend.
238
00:09:32,227 --> 00:09:33,649
Remember that.
239
00:09:35,773 --> 00:09:38,713
Well, I have got to go
find Philip and apologize.
240
00:09:38,714 --> 00:09:40,272
You know, I may have called
him a no-good philanderer
241
00:09:40,596 --> 00:09:43,370
and made a disparaging
remark about the crown jewels.
242
00:09:44,466 --> 00:09:46,358
His, not the Queen's.
243
00:09:48,046 --> 00:09:50,411
(Chuckles) Wow.
244
00:09:50,773 --> 00:09:54,381
Hey, Ben, when did you
become such a Philip fan?
245
00:09:54,382 --> 00:09:56,133
When I realized that
Riley will never forgive me
246
00:09:56,134 --> 00:09:57,684
if she finds out the truth.
247
00:09:57,685 --> 00:09:59,348
Philip didn't hit on a student.
248
00:09:59,349 --> 00:10:00,469
It was me.
249
00:10:00,470 --> 00:10:02,220
Oh, my God. Philip hit on you?
250
00:10:05,314 --> 00:10:06,753
Dude, I'm telling you,
251
00:10:06,754 --> 00:10:09,079
you can never tell with those brits.
252
00:10:10,260 --> 00:10:11,608
No!
253
00:10:11,609 --> 00:10:13,092
I hit on one of his students
254
00:10:13,093 --> 00:10:14,937
using your stupid accent routine.
255
00:10:14,938 --> 00:10:16,705
- And did it work?
- Obviously not.
256
00:10:16,706 --> 00:10:18,474
Well, then it wasn't my routine.
257
00:10:22,383 --> 00:10:24,738
Okay, after a few failed attempts,
258
00:10:24,739 --> 00:10:26,356
I am finally out of here.
259
00:10:26,357 --> 00:10:28,839
- See ya.
- Hey, slow down.
260
00:10:28,840 --> 00:10:31,459
Not to be all girly, but no goodbye kiss?
261
00:10:32,249 --> 00:10:33,722
Ooh, Danny.
262
00:10:33,723 --> 00:10:35,691
I'm sorry, but I can't.
263
00:10:35,692 --> 00:10:37,837
- This was bad.
- Sorry.
264
00:10:37,838 --> 00:10:40,108
First time's usually a little awkward.
265
00:10:41,761 --> 00:10:43,320
Danny, this is a conflict of interest.
266
00:10:43,321 --> 00:10:44,538
I can be fired.
267
00:10:44,539 --> 00:10:47,287
Oh, well, we'll just make sure
that nobody else finds out.
268
00:10:47,288 --> 00:10:49,225
Just don't write anything too nice about me
269
00:10:49,226 --> 00:10:50,652
in the paper tomorrow.
270
00:10:50,653 --> 00:10:51,870
Wait.
271
00:10:51,871 --> 00:10:53,569
Is that what this is about?
272
00:10:53,570 --> 00:10:56,025
Is that why you talked me into bed?
273
00:10:56,026 --> 00:10:57,712
You want me to go easy on you?!
274
00:10:57,713 --> 00:10:59,293
Whoa whoa, calm down.
275
00:10:59,294 --> 00:11:00,381
No.
276
00:11:00,382 --> 00:11:02,366
You can go any way you want on me.
277
00:11:03,595 --> 00:11:05,189
Logan, I like you.
278
00:11:05,190 --> 00:11:06,770
And I like you too.
279
00:11:06,771 --> 00:11:08,681
Which is why this will never work.
280
00:11:08,682 --> 00:11:11,075
I have to be able to
write the truth about you.
281
00:11:11,076 --> 00:11:14,206
And unfortunately, your game's
not as pretty as you are.
282
00:11:15,284 --> 00:11:17,581
Hey... I'm working on it.
283
00:11:17,582 --> 00:11:19,183
Not as hard as you should be.
284
00:11:19,184 --> 00:11:20,666
I think you're a really good player,
285
00:11:20,667 --> 00:11:22,171
but you could be great.
286
00:11:22,172 --> 00:11:23,204
You really think so?
287
00:11:23,205 --> 00:11:24,650
Yeah, I do.
288
00:11:27,869 --> 00:11:29,102
See you around, Wheeler.
289
00:11:34,676 --> 00:11:35,992
- Hello, Logan!
- (Yelps)
290
00:11:35,993 --> 00:11:38,800
(Exhales) Ah, the mother.
291
00:11:39,327 --> 00:11:40,651
Hi. I was just...
292
00:11:40,652 --> 00:11:43,391
Oh, I know exactly what you were just...
293
00:11:44,324 --> 00:11:45,448
Seriously?
294
00:11:45,449 --> 00:11:48,287
I live across the alley, and those boys
leave the blinds open all the time.
295
00:11:49,614 --> 00:11:51,672
Well, I hope you enjoyed the show,
296
00:11:51,673 --> 00:11:53,774
but it was a one night only kinda thing.
297
00:11:53,775 --> 00:11:55,720
Ohh, that's too bad.
298
00:11:55,721 --> 00:11:57,690
I was going to invite your editor
299
00:11:57,691 --> 00:11:59,343
to the next performance.
300
00:12:00,748 --> 00:12:01,884
My editor?
301
00:12:02,254 --> 00:12:04,765
That sounds like a
not-so-very-veiled threat.
302
00:12:04,766 --> 00:12:07,127
Oh, and here I was afraid
you weren't gonna get it.
303
00:12:08,748 --> 00:12:10,198
Oh, I get it.
304
00:12:10,199 --> 00:12:12,174
And now I'm just waiting
to hear what you want.
305
00:12:12,175 --> 00:12:14,731
Well, what I want is a star map,
306
00:12:14,732 --> 00:12:18,142
an unmarked van and the alarm
code to Jon Bon Jovi's house.
307
00:12:20,217 --> 00:12:22,483
But I'll settle for you
308
00:12:22,484 --> 00:12:25,154
writing a nice article about Danny.
309
00:12:25,155 --> 00:12:28,467
So you want me to throw away
my journalistic integrity?
310
00:12:28,468 --> 00:12:30,038
Oh, honey, you left that
on Danny's nightstand
311
00:12:30,039 --> 00:12:32,135
next to your morals and scruples.
312
00:12:33,752 --> 00:12:34,890
Wow.
313
00:12:35,357 --> 00:12:38,249
I have faced a lot of
challenges in this business.
314
00:12:38,250 --> 00:12:41,605
I never thought my biggest one
would come from another woman.
315
00:12:41,606 --> 00:12:42,904
Oh, I'm not a woman.
316
00:12:44,477 --> 00:12:46,342
I'm a mother.
317
00:12:52,272 --> 00:12:55,344
Dude, what is taking you so long?
318
00:12:55,345 --> 00:12:57,967
You know I'm not good
at looking inconspicuous.
319
00:12:57,968 --> 00:13:00,386
In related news, I'm
rushing sigma beta kappa.
320
00:13:01,323 --> 00:13:02,289
I'm sorry, man.
321
00:13:02,290 --> 00:13:03,448
I just gotta find that girl's paperwork.
322
00:13:03,449 --> 00:13:05,290
She left it here
somewhere. Here, hold Emma.
323
00:13:05,608 --> 00:13:08,494
Dude, I cannot believe you
brought your baby on a heist.
324
00:13:08,495 --> 00:13:09,918
Are you kidding? It's genius.
325
00:13:09,919 --> 00:13:12,755
If someone catches me, I was just
looking for a place to change the baby.
326
00:13:12,756 --> 00:13:15,381
And trust me, not one's gonna be
checking to see if I'm telling the truth.
327
00:13:15,382 --> 00:13:17,351
Hilip: I'll just be two
seconds and we'll be on our way.
328
00:13:17,352 --> 00:13:18,505
That's him!
329
00:13:18,846 --> 00:13:20,795
Under the desk. Go go go.
330
00:13:24,014 --> 00:13:25,332
I can't tell you how much it means to me
331
00:13:25,333 --> 00:13:26,796
that you're standing
by me through all this.
332
00:13:26,797 --> 00:13:28,975
Oh, well, you kinda have
Ben to thank for that.
333
00:13:28,976 --> 00:13:31,134
See, I knew he wasn't as
bad as you made him out be.
334
00:13:31,988 --> 00:13:33,885
There has to be something you can do.
335
00:13:33,886 --> 00:13:34,794
You have to fight this.
336
00:13:34,795 --> 00:13:35,885
It's her word against mine.
337
00:13:35,886 --> 00:13:37,128
And since I'm the teacher without tenure,
338
00:13:37,545 --> 00:13:39,429
easier on everyone just to fire me.
339
00:13:39,430 --> 00:13:40,694
Well, I'll hire you.
340
00:13:41,127 --> 00:13:43,477
You know, for general boyfriend duties,
341
00:13:43,478 --> 00:13:44,886
maybe some light housekeeping.
342
00:13:45,729 --> 00:13:48,751
Unfortunately, this whole
mess is now delaying my visa.
343
00:13:48,752 --> 00:13:51,076
If I don't get it, I'm packing to go home.
344
00:13:51,467 --> 00:13:53,453
No, you can't go now.
345
00:13:53,454 --> 00:13:55,378
I just started to understand you.
346
00:13:56,339 --> 00:13:57,864
There really is nothing we can do.
347
00:14:00,071 --> 00:14:01,278
Unless...
348
00:14:02,965 --> 00:14:04,317
Unless what?
349
00:14:05,556 --> 00:14:07,798
Riley, is there any
chance you'd consider...
350
00:14:09,308 --> 00:14:10,763
Marrying me?
351
00:14:16,242 --> 00:14:17,718
- Hey, Logan. Can I talk to you?
- No!
352
00:14:17,719 --> 00:14:19,444
Then I guess you don't
want your computer back.
353
00:14:19,445 --> 00:14:20,994
Of course that's where I left it.
354
00:14:20,995 --> 00:14:23,381
Mm-hmm. And this day just
goes from bad to worse.
355
00:14:23,798 --> 00:14:25,776
Hey, I know you don't want
everyone to know about us,
356
00:14:25,777 --> 00:14:27,489
but can you turn the hostile down?
357
00:14:27,490 --> 00:14:28,823
You're making me feel bad.
358
00:14:28,824 --> 00:14:30,680
Oh, and I'm supposed to
care about your feelings
359
00:14:30,681 --> 00:14:32,560
after what you and your mom pulled?
360
00:14:32,561 --> 00:14:34,006
What does my mom have to do with this?
361
00:14:34,007 --> 00:14:35,265
Don't play dumb, Wheeler.
362
00:14:35,266 --> 00:14:36,686
And don't even worry about me.
363
00:14:36,687 --> 00:14:38,444
I already asked to get
transferred to another beat.
364
00:14:38,754 --> 00:14:41,655
Oh, and good luck sleeping with
the next reporter they send in.
365
00:14:42,104 --> 00:14:45,140
Unless it's Ken. He likes tall guys.
366
00:14:46,040 --> 00:14:47,041
Just know...
367
00:14:47,042 --> 00:14:48,648
That you are never gonna
be better than mediocre
368
00:14:48,649 --> 00:14:50,247
if you're not willing to hear the truth.
369
00:14:51,589 --> 00:14:53,304
Danny! Have you seen Phil and Riley?
370
00:14:53,305 --> 00:14:54,622
They're not in their seats.
371
00:14:54,623 --> 00:14:56,479
Oh, yeah, she called. They can't make it.
372
00:14:56,480 --> 00:14:59,180
Something about having to go
by their friend court's house.
373
00:14:59,181 --> 00:15:02,846
Or possibly the courthouse?
374
00:15:02,847 --> 00:15:04,824
No, I'm pretty sure she said court's house.
375
00:15:05,482 --> 00:15:07,802
She wouldn't actually go
through with it, would she?
376
00:15:07,803 --> 00:15:10,831
(In British accent) I don't
suppose you'd consider marrying me?
377
00:15:10,832 --> 00:15:12,949
(Normal voice) Dude, I almost said yes!
378
00:15:12,950 --> 00:15:14,911
We've gotta go. Oh, mom! Good. You're here.
379
00:15:14,912 --> 00:15:16,505
Hey, do you wanna hold
Emma for like two seconds?
380
00:15:16,506 --> 00:15:17,560
- Yes.
- Thanks.
381
00:15:17,561 --> 00:15:18,697
Do you wanna hold the bag for another sec?
382
00:15:18,698 --> 00:15:19,928
- Oh, yeah yeah.
- Sweet...
383
00:15:22,696 --> 00:15:24,433
Mom, did you talk to Logan?
384
00:15:24,434 --> 00:15:26,763
Oh, I did more than talk to her.
385
00:15:26,764 --> 00:15:28,530
I kinda blackmailed her.
386
00:15:28,531 --> 00:15:30,757
Yeah.Show mama some love, huh?
387
00:15:30,758 --> 00:15:32,152
Yeah?
388
00:15:34,953 --> 00:15:37,423
- Do you see her?
- Oh oh! There she is.
389
00:15:37,424 --> 00:15:39,710
Aw, I like that she's not wearing white.
390
00:15:39,711 --> 00:15:40,911
It's more honest.
391
00:15:42,560 --> 00:15:44,097
Riley, wait.
392
00:15:44,725 --> 00:15:46,061
Ben, what are you doing here?
393
00:15:46,062 --> 00:15:47,401
Trying to stop you from doing something
394
00:15:47,402 --> 00:15:49,367
you could end up regretting
for the rest of your life.
395
00:15:49,368 --> 00:15:50,881
Riley, this is too big a decision.
396
00:15:50,882 --> 00:15:52,124
You can't just rush into this.
397
00:15:52,125 --> 00:15:55,045
Rest of my life? This is
maybe three years, tops.
398
00:15:55,046 --> 00:15:56,951
And what do you really
even know about him anyway?
399
00:15:56,952 --> 00:16:00,434
Yeah, sure, he looks like a
prince and talks like a Butler,
400
00:16:00,764 --> 00:16:04,681
but superficial reasons aren't enough
to write your name down next to his.
401
00:16:10,673 --> 00:16:12,431
(Chuckles softly) But you're
the one who convinced me
402
00:16:12,432 --> 00:16:13,710
how great he was.
403
00:16:13,711 --> 00:16:15,780
And you picked today to
start listening to me?
404
00:16:17,300 --> 00:16:19,685
And using her like this
to stay in the country?
405
00:16:19,686 --> 00:16:21,703
How can you live with yourself?
406
00:16:26,108 --> 00:16:28,600
Ben, it's just a piece of paper.
407
00:16:28,601 --> 00:16:30,808
No, it's not. Don't you get it?
408
00:16:30,809 --> 00:16:33,110
This shouldn't just be your
first. This should be your only.
409
00:16:33,111 --> 00:16:34,881
Your happily ever after.
410
00:16:34,882 --> 00:16:37,599
And it should be with a
guy who understands you
411
00:16:37,600 --> 00:16:40,790
and will be by your side
when you're old and ugly
412
00:16:40,791 --> 00:16:42,294
and you need one of those chairs
413
00:16:42,295 --> 00:16:43,875
that goes up and down stairs.
414
00:16:45,063 --> 00:16:47,369
My Nana actually died in one of those.
415
00:16:49,766 --> 00:16:52,310
Yeah, she just kept going
up and down for like two days
416
00:16:52,311 --> 00:16:53,699
before we found her.
417
00:16:54,086 --> 00:16:55,942
(mouthing)
418
00:17:00,736 --> 00:17:03,207
What exactly do you think we're doing?
419
00:17:03,208 --> 00:17:04,419
Getting married.
420
00:17:04,420 --> 00:17:06,587
No! Why would I do that?
421
00:17:06,588 --> 00:17:09,671
Ben, I'm here helping Philip
with the paperwork for his visa.
422
00:17:10,171 --> 00:17:11,743
But aren't you getting fired?
423
00:17:11,744 --> 00:17:13,644
Oh, no, the university called.
424
00:17:13,645 --> 00:17:15,563
Apparently, the young woman saw my picture,
425
00:17:15,564 --> 00:17:17,093
realized she'd made a mistake.
426
00:17:17,935 --> 00:17:19,450
Ohh...
427
00:17:20,445 --> 00:17:22,231
Well, then, in that case,
428
00:17:22,232 --> 00:17:23,732
have a lovely afternoon
and welcome to the States.
429
00:17:24,207 --> 00:17:25,237
Yeah.
430
00:17:25,837 --> 00:17:27,444
But, you know, I'm wondering
431
00:17:27,445 --> 00:17:30,204
what she'd say if we
showed her your picture.
432
00:17:30,205 --> 00:17:31,319
My picture?
433
00:17:31,771 --> 00:17:33,429
(Sighs deeply)
434
00:17:33,430 --> 00:17:36,424
(In British accent) Well, isn't
this just a dilly of a pickle?
435
00:17:36,425 --> 00:17:37,726
(Chuckles)
436
00:17:38,764 --> 00:17:41,114
Oh, my God, Ben, what is wrong with you?!
437
00:17:41,115 --> 00:17:43,345
Riley, I was just trying to prove
to you I could be your friend
438
00:17:43,346 --> 00:17:44,898
by trying to be his friend.
439
00:17:45,212 --> 00:17:47,539
- And then Tucker suggested...
- Ooh, don't even go there.
440
00:17:49,587 --> 00:17:51,769
Philip, man, I'm so sorry.
441
00:17:52,258 --> 00:17:53,408
You've been nothing but nice to me,
442
00:17:53,409 --> 00:17:55,116
and I've been nothing but a jerk to you.
443
00:17:56,009 --> 00:17:57,435
Ben, you're an odd fellow.
444
00:17:57,970 --> 00:18:00,934
But you are one of Riley's oldest friends.
445
00:18:00,935 --> 00:18:02,359
Mm, let's not get crazy.
446
00:18:03,191 --> 00:18:06,751
So I suppose the right thing
to do is accept your apology.
447
00:18:08,220 --> 00:18:09,564
What about you, Riley?
448
00:18:10,724 --> 00:18:13,166
I still can't believe you
thought I would get married.
449
00:18:13,664 --> 00:18:15,278
In this.
450
00:18:17,011 --> 00:18:19,664
But if Philip can forgive you,
451
00:18:19,665 --> 00:18:22,001
then I guess I can too.
452
00:18:22,526 --> 00:18:24,191
- Hug?
- Mm, I'm not there yet.
453
00:18:25,055 --> 00:18:26,118
Good enough for me.
454
00:18:27,718 --> 00:18:29,136
Tucker, man, you comin'?
455
00:18:29,137 --> 00:18:30,385
Yeah yeah yeah. In a sec.
456
00:18:30,386 --> 00:18:32,256
Kelly and Joe asked me
to be their best man.
457
00:18:35,634 --> 00:18:36,735
(Knocking on door)
458
00:18:36,736 --> 00:18:37,892
It's open.
459
00:18:38,962 --> 00:18:40,678
Your message said you
weren't gonna be here.
460
00:18:41,082 --> 00:18:44,690
For some reason, people seem to get
upset when you leave a baby alone.
461
00:18:45,820 --> 00:18:48,266
What the hell is this?
Did you use my computer?
462
00:18:48,267 --> 00:18:50,979
It's a little article
about how my drop pass sucks
463
00:18:50,980 --> 00:18:52,441
and I need to work on my speed.
464
00:18:52,833 --> 00:18:55,588
What the hell is this?! Do you
see what just went up online?
465
00:18:56,015 --> 00:18:57,865
Oh, you!
466
00:18:59,196 --> 00:19:01,279
You are going down.
467
00:19:01,280 --> 00:19:03,763
When I am done, the only
thing you'll be writing
468
00:19:03,764 --> 00:19:06,192
is people's names on coffee cups!
469
00:19:07,339 --> 00:19:09,926
Mom, Logan didn't write the story. I did.
470
00:19:09,927 --> 00:19:13,012
Really? Why would you write that you're not
471
00:19:13,013 --> 00:19:14,804
living up to your potential?
472
00:19:14,805 --> 00:19:17,248
And when did you learn
how to spell "potential"?!
473
00:19:21,261 --> 00:19:22,783
Why would you do that?
474
00:19:22,784 --> 00:19:24,702
I didn't want you to
think that I was using you.
475
00:19:25,428 --> 00:19:27,145
And how am I supposed
to become a better player
476
00:19:27,146 --> 00:19:29,180
if you stop everyone from criticizing me?
477
00:19:29,181 --> 00:19:30,337
I mean, what are you gonna do next?
478
00:19:30,338 --> 00:19:31,865
Start dating the owner?
479
00:19:31,866 --> 00:19:33,449
I'm working on it.
480
00:19:34,700 --> 00:19:37,456
But he keeps changing his cellphone number.
(Groans softly)
481
00:19:38,897 --> 00:19:41,495
You can't keep trying to beat
up all the bullies for me.
482
00:19:41,496 --> 00:19:42,877
I can take a few hits.
483
00:19:42,878 --> 00:19:45,604
But, Danny, I am just doing
what I think is best for you.
484
00:19:45,605 --> 00:19:47,603
I know. And I love you for it.
485
00:19:48,808 --> 00:19:51,037
And I don't know what to say.
486
00:19:51,038 --> 00:19:52,729
Maybe I did misjudge you.
487
00:19:52,730 --> 00:19:54,943
Not your playing, but you.
488
00:19:55,860 --> 00:19:56,955
Well, great.
489
00:19:57,283 --> 00:19:59,577
I guess I've got all three of
my ladies taken care of then.
490
00:19:59,578 --> 00:20:00,857
All three?
491
00:20:01,735 --> 00:20:03,136
Hey, darlin'.
492
00:20:03,720 --> 00:20:06,098
I traded her pom-poms for a puck.
493
00:20:06,400 --> 00:20:08,863
Emma, you can be whatever you wanna be.
494
00:20:08,864 --> 00:20:11,775
A cheerleader, an
athlete, a writer or a mom.
495
00:20:12,111 --> 00:20:16,095
Well, you might not wanna be a
cheerleader and a mom at the same time.
496
00:20:17,404 --> 00:20:19,835
(Groaning) It was tough.
497
00:20:22,063 --> 00:20:23,299
Are you sure we can't
keep seeing each other?
498
00:20:23,707 --> 00:20:24,665
I'm sure.
499
00:20:25,020 --> 00:20:26,843
(Both panting)
500
00:20:28,021 --> 00:20:29,687
You're right, we can't keep doing this.
501
00:20:29,688 --> 00:20:30,669
Uh-uh.
502
00:20:30,670 --> 00:20:31,830
So same time tomorrow?
503
00:20:31,831 --> 00:20:33,373
- Uh-huh.
- Yeah.
504
00:20:36,548 --> 00:20:39,120
(In British accent)
You are a cheeky little dove.
505
00:20:39,121 --> 00:20:41,403
I'd like to fly you home to my nest.
506
00:20:42,309 --> 00:20:43,242
(Laughs)
507
00:20:43,243 --> 00:20:45,669
Tucker, your accent is
almost perfect... amazing.
508
00:20:45,670 --> 00:20:46,952
Okay okay, now me, now me.
509
00:20:47,317 --> 00:20:48,752
(In Irish accent) I'm a Randy lad
510
00:20:48,753 --> 00:20:51,503
looking for a good snog. Care to join me?
511
00:20:52,635 --> 00:20:54,780
Or maybe we could try...
512
00:20:55,829 --> 00:20:58,277
My mate says American
girls don't kiss well.
513
00:20:58,278 --> 00:20:59,476
I disagree.
514
00:20:59,858 --> 00:21:01,355
Care to settle the argument?
515
00:21:02,081 --> 00:21:04,395
- Oh, that is so good!
- Oh, damn!
516
00:21:04,976 --> 00:21:06,524
That is so good! I love it, man.
517
00:21:06,970 --> 00:21:08,700
This was all before I met you, darling.
518
00:21:09,681 --> 00:21:11,216
Uh, remind me again
519
00:21:11,217 --> 00:21:13,091
why I insisted you guys hang out?
520
00:21:13,092 --> 00:21:14,635
- (Guys laugh)
- Who knows?
521
00:21:14,636 --> 00:21:17,609
- We love him!
- New bestie! (Laughs)
522
00:21:17,659 --> 00:21:22,209
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