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1
00:01:00,142 --> 00:01:04,396
Presenters
Yuen Kam-Lun, Norman Cheung Sek-Gui
2
00:01:18,035 --> 00:01:22,039
Producer Yuen Kam-Lun
Executive Producer Wong Siu-Ming
3
00:01:58,367 --> 00:02:00,077
Planning Rico Chu Tak-On
Production Manager Lee Wah
4
00:02:00,411 --> 00:02:02,329
Screenplay Ho Tung
Associate Production Manager Law Sau Wai
5
00:02:30,274 --> 00:02:31,900
Director of Photography Eric Chu Kwok Fai
6
00:02:32,234 --> 00:02:34,569
Art Direction David Lo Kin-Ming
Joey Wong Styling Kenneth Yee Chung Man
7
00:02:48,918 --> 00:02:50,669
Action Directors: Poon Kin Kwan,
Benz Kong To-hoi, Steve Mak Fei-hung
8
00:02:51,003 --> 00:02:53,338
Car Stunts: Bruce Law Lai Yin,
Bruce Law Stunts Unlimited
9
00:03:09,355 --> 00:03:11,398
Assistant Director
Michelle Wong Yuk-Ting, Paco Yiu Fung-Suen
10
00:03:11,732 --> 00:03:13,233
Editor Cheung Bei-Tak
Special Effects Stephen Ma Man-Yin
11
00:03:13,859 --> 00:03:16,736
BELOVED FATHER BELOVED MOTHER
12
00:03:32,378 --> 00:03:36,715
Music Philip Chan Fei Lit
Theme Song "Tian Di You You"
13
00:03:44,140 --> 00:03:46,058
Starring
Lam Ching Ying, Joey Wong, Shing Fui-On
14
00:03:46,392 --> 00:03:48,685
Anthony Wong, Gabriel Wong Yat-San,
Rico Chu Tak-On
15
00:04:08,831 --> 00:04:13,293
Director
Wilson Yip Shing Hong
16
00:04:21,969 --> 00:04:25,514
You can't escape my Supernatural Fan!
17
00:04:38,986 --> 00:04:39,903
Stab!
18
00:05:07,640 --> 00:05:08,557
Shoot.
19
00:05:10,684 --> 00:05:13,019
Little Turtle,
stop pretending to be asleep.
20
00:05:13,354 --> 00:05:14,146
Come here.
21
00:05:15,773 --> 00:05:16,899
What is it, sifu?
22
00:05:17,233 --> 00:05:19,860
You didn't think to mention that
a poisonous snake was in my pants?
23
00:05:20,194 --> 00:05:21,278
Are you trying to test me?
24
00:05:21,612 --> 00:05:24,656
Sifu, why would I bother
you with something so simple?
25
00:05:24,990 --> 00:05:26,449
Now that would be insulting!
26
00:05:27,243 --> 00:05:29,119
If only you were
half as smart as your excuses.
27
00:05:29,453 --> 00:05:32,038
Well, then you better
teach me more moves, Sifu.
28
00:05:32,706 --> 00:05:35,333
Pack up, and
let's get on the road.
29
00:05:35,668 --> 00:05:37,294
Such a chatterbox.
30
00:05:42,132 --> 00:05:44,092
Sifu, snake! Help!
31
00:05:44,510 --> 00:05:46,929
Sifu! Help!
32
00:05:49,932 --> 00:05:54,019
An Eternal Combat
33
00:07:25,986 --> 00:07:27,862
Wait, sifu, let me finish!
34
00:07:48,968 --> 00:07:52,513
You've finally returned to me.
35
00:08:02,648 --> 00:08:05,651
Darling, now you're mine forever.
36
00:08:31,885 --> 00:08:33,469
What demon are you?
37
00:09:06,587 --> 00:09:09,381
Sifu, sifu...
38
00:09:09,715 --> 00:09:11,508
You've got the upper
hand, let's give chase!
39
00:09:12,426 --> 00:09:15,554
Demon, I have underestimated you.
40
00:09:15,888 --> 00:09:17,472
Reassess if you've underestimated.
41
00:09:17,806 --> 00:09:19,808
Why are you just standing
around like a dummy?
42
00:09:29,735 --> 00:09:31,111
My Lord, what do you think?
43
00:09:31,445 --> 00:09:33,238
What do I think?
How the hell do I know?
44
00:09:33,572 --> 00:09:34,781
Six more dead!
45
00:09:35,115 --> 00:09:36,658
Boy do I wish
I was one of you.
46
00:09:36,992 --> 00:09:39,828
This is all your fault!
47
00:09:41,455 --> 00:09:42,706
Why are you standing here?
48
00:09:43,916 --> 00:09:45,375
You...you are?
49
00:09:49,379 --> 00:09:51,756
Lord Ma!
50
00:09:52,382 --> 00:09:54,300
Your servant greets Lord Ma.
51
00:09:54,676 --> 00:09:57,095
Quit the yammering,
and lower your hands!
52
00:09:57,429 --> 00:09:58,304
Yes, sir.
53
00:10:03,894 --> 00:10:07,522
-Are you trying to get fired?
-Have mercy, my lord!
54
00:10:07,856 --> 00:10:08,565
Have mercy!
55
00:10:08,899 --> 00:10:11,526
There's a demon out there, and
you're in here playing with corpses?
56
00:10:11,860 --> 00:10:12,735
No, I was--
57
00:10:13,070 --> 00:10:14,863
No? What?
58
00:10:15,239 --> 00:10:16,740
Who said you could speak?
59
00:10:19,576 --> 00:10:20,702
Please continue, my lord.
60
00:10:24,790 --> 00:10:25,749
Listen up!
61
00:10:26,250 --> 00:10:29,294
You have seven days to bring me that
Japanese Demon King!
62
00:10:29,628 --> 00:10:31,254
Or get a noose fitted
and hang yourself!
63
00:10:31,588 --> 00:10:34,549
Which is to say, you should
hang yourself in eight days.
64
00:10:34,883 --> 00:10:39,137
What.. . what?
Hang myself”? No, please!
65
00:10:39,471 --> 00:10:40,972
May I drink arsenic instead?
66
00:10:41,306 --> 00:10:43,141
His Majesty's decree has arrived!
67
00:10:48,689 --> 00:10:53,189
(Stuttering) His Majesty,
the Son of Heaven, appoints
68
00:10:54,194 --> 00:10:56,905
Ma Sheung-fung a Royal Official.
69
00:10:57,239 --> 00:11:01,739
He loves his people as if they were his own
sons, has been recognised.
70
00:11:04,496 --> 00:11:06,789
He is hereby promoted three ranks,
71
00:11:08,250 --> 00:11:10,001
to be a first rank official.
72
00:11:10,335 --> 00:11:11,377
We're saved, my lord!
73
00:11:12,171 --> 00:11:15,340
Long Live His Majesty!
74
00:11:16,258 --> 00:11:20,758
(Stuttering) What's the rush?
75
00:11:21,555 --> 00:11:25,559
(Stuttering) I'm not finished reading.
76
00:11:26,351 --> 00:11:27,143
-Yes.
-We
77
00:11:27,561 --> 00:11:29,437
(Stuttering) We...
78
00:11:29,771 --> 00:11:30,855
We... what?
79
00:11:34,234 --> 00:11:35,735
My lord, you have it upside down.
80
00:11:36,069 --> 00:11:37,111
You don't think I know that?
81
00:11:37,487 --> 00:11:38,863
If you're so smart,
you read it!
82
00:11:42,784 --> 00:11:44,535
-May I not read it, sir?
-No!
83
00:11:44,953 --> 00:11:46,496
-I really must read?
-and quickly too!
84
00:11:46,830 --> 00:11:47,330
Yes.
85
00:11:48,749 --> 00:11:51,668
We have heard that the
Demon King is in your county
86
00:11:52,002 --> 00:11:54,004
terrorizing the peasants,
murdering without blinking.
87
00:11:54,338 --> 00:11:56,882
We order you, Official Ma,
to capture and contain this demon.
88
00:11:57,216 --> 00:12:00,594
We give you seven
days, no extensions.
89
00:12:02,429 --> 00:12:04,264
Here ends the royal proclamation.
90
00:12:05,933 --> 00:12:07,059
Here ends the royal proclamation!
91
00:12:09,061 --> 00:12:10,520
What if we had an extra day or two?
92
00:12:10,854 --> 00:12:12,105
(Stuttering) Of course...
93
00:12:12,439 --> 00:12:13,231
Not!
94
00:12:13,857 --> 00:12:18,357
(Stuttering) You better get a noose
fitted for yourself on the eighth day!
95
00:12:25,077 --> 00:12:26,953
I, Ma Sheung-fung, have been
an official for many years.
96
00:12:27,287 --> 00:12:30,081
And though I have no big contributions, I
have also never done anything bad.
97
00:12:30,415 --> 00:12:32,458
Why is disaster striking me now?
98
00:12:39,841 --> 00:12:42,760
My five darling wives,
I know you're unable to help me.
99
00:12:43,095 --> 00:12:45,514
(Wives enumerated, nameless)
If you could have helped me,
100
00:12:45,847 --> 00:12:48,724
you would have
helped long ago, right?
101
00:12:50,310 --> 00:12:52,395
My darling wives,
please drink with me.
102
00:12:54,815 --> 00:12:57,150
Papa, papa!
103
00:12:57,484 --> 00:12:59,110
You said you'd
buy me new clothes!
104
00:12:59,444 --> 00:13:01,237
Papa, you said you'd
get me new shoes!
105
00:13:01,571 --> 00:13:02,738
Buy me toys!
106
00:13:03,073 --> 00:13:06,743
Shut up! Don't you know
your Father is in trouble?
107
00:13:07,077 --> 00:13:09,329
My lord, no need to worry!
108
00:13:10,122 --> 00:13:12,415
Your servant has heard
that 10 miles from here,
109
00:13:12,749 --> 00:13:15,960
a learned man, a dragon
among pigs, lives in a hut.
110
00:13:16,295 --> 00:13:19,047
He's a master of the supernatural,
his skills are boundless.
111
00:13:19,673 --> 00:13:22,676
My lord, let's visit him in person.
112
00:13:25,429 --> 00:13:26,721
Why didn't you
say anything earlier?
113
00:13:27,055 --> 00:13:28,514
It's your fault I've
been drinking alone!
114
00:13:32,311 --> 00:13:36,811
Hey, could it be any farther?
I'm so fucking tired. Aren't you tired?
115
00:13:37,691 --> 00:13:41,486
My lord, you're just out of practice.
We're almost there.
116
00:13:44,573 --> 00:13:45,782
Are we there yet?
117
00:13:46,408 --> 00:13:48,326
Just the mountain
across the way.
118
00:13:48,660 --> 00:13:50,536
-Then start walking!
-Yes, yes.
119
00:13:52,080 --> 00:13:55,124
Are you crazy?
You call this a hut?
120
00:13:55,542 --> 00:13:56,834
I'm guessing this is it.
121
00:13:57,169 --> 00:13:58,295
If it isn't,
you're screwed!
122
00:13:59,796 --> 00:14:02,548
Advisor, how could
someone live in this hut?
123
00:14:02,883 --> 00:14:04,259
I'd say it's a toilet!
124
00:14:05,677 --> 00:14:07,512
My lord, my lord!
125
00:14:07,846 --> 00:14:09,013
The Cho Lo Residence.
126
00:14:09,348 --> 00:14:11,058
-What is it?
-I'm sure this is not a toilet
127
00:14:11,391 --> 00:14:14,769
-You sniffed around?
-It's written here, see?
128
00:14:15,937 --> 00:14:17,438
Go to hell!
129
00:14:17,773 --> 00:14:19,024
You know I'm illiterate!
130
00:14:20,108 --> 00:14:22,276
You motherfucker,
thankfully no one heard that.
131
00:14:22,611 --> 00:14:23,612
Go announce my arrival!
132
00:14:23,945 --> 00:14:25,446
Alright, I will.
133
00:14:25,781 --> 00:14:27,449
You probably kicked
open my hernia.
134
00:14:28,533 --> 00:14:29,825
-Hurry up and announce!
-Yes!
135
00:14:33,663 --> 00:14:38,000
The Royal Guard of the
First Rank, Ma Sheung-fung!
136
00:14:38,335 --> 00:14:40,420
Lord Ma has arrived!
137
00:14:41,171 --> 00:14:43,715
Hey, when did I
get that extra title?
138
00:14:44,049 --> 00:14:45,550
It's trendy to exaggerate.
139
00:14:46,259 --> 00:14:47,468
Yeah?
140
00:14:48,845 --> 00:14:51,305
Here is, the governor of two provinces,
141
00:14:51,640 --> 00:14:52,682
Exaggerate?
142
00:14:59,106 --> 00:15:00,065
How did that happen?
143
00:15:03,276 --> 00:15:05,903
My lord, this is the
power of illusion.
144
00:15:06,238 --> 00:15:07,697
-Illusion?
-illusion!
145
00:15:09,658 --> 00:15:11,701
Hey, Advisor, quit horsing around.
Let's get out of here.
146
00:15:13,662 --> 00:15:16,456
My lord, this is also magic.
147
00:15:17,499 --> 00:15:18,625
Fuck.
148
00:15:19,543 --> 00:15:20,460
What should we do, sir?
149
00:15:20,794 --> 00:15:21,920
Forward, what else?
150
00:15:22,254 --> 00:15:23,797
Come, let's go together!
151
00:15:30,887 --> 00:15:32,889
I was wondering what fell in,
152
00:15:33,223 --> 00:15:34,766
but it turns out its two wet dogs?
153
00:15:35,100 --> 00:15:38,228
-Why you...
-Fuck you!
154
00:15:38,728 --> 00:15:41,397
On shore you look
more like wet chickens.
155
00:15:42,315 --> 00:15:44,608
You little shit, how dare
you insult us! Beat him up!
156
00:15:44,943 --> 00:15:45,777
Yes!
157
00:15:49,114 --> 00:15:52,367
You motherfucker,
who is the boss here?
158
00:15:52,701 --> 00:15:54,285
-You are.
-You want to beat me up?
159
00:15:54,619 --> 00:15:56,078
You can boast about it.
160
00:15:56,830 --> 00:15:57,747
You pocket-sized twerp,
161
00:15:58,081 --> 00:15:59,290
-Bring it!
- How are you!
162
00:15:59,624 --> 00:16:01,584
-Where can you go?
-Little Turtle, behave!
163
00:16:03,753 --> 00:16:05,337
Sir, it's Cho Lo, the Tao Master.
164
00:16:06,465 --> 00:16:07,424
Sifu.
165
00:16:12,053 --> 00:16:15,639
Please forgive me for
the welcome, my lord.
166
00:16:17,976 --> 00:16:22,105
It is an honor for us that
you have travelled so far.
167
00:16:22,898 --> 00:16:23,815
Sifu.
168
00:16:24,441 --> 00:16:25,567
Please have some tea.
169
00:16:30,989 --> 00:16:32,323
Bring another cup immediately.
170
00:16:32,657 --> 00:16:35,701
Sifu, no one ever visits us.
171
00:16:36,036 --> 00:16:37,829
We only had the two cups.
172
00:16:53,637 --> 00:16:56,556
In that case,
let's share, Lord Ma.
173
00:17:02,229 --> 00:17:05,023
Lord, is the tea
not to your liking?
174
00:17:05,357 --> 00:17:08,193
You old weasel, how dare you
try to fool me with your illusions!
175
00:17:08,610 --> 00:17:10,945
How dare you take me for a fool
just because I'm polite!
176
00:17:11,446 --> 00:17:12,780
I better stay back.
177
00:17:15,534 --> 00:17:17,911
This style is called
Horizontal Sweep of a Thousand Troops.
178
00:17:18,245 --> 00:17:20,163
My lord, show him
Dividing the Mountain.
179
00:17:28,004 --> 00:17:30,172
My lord, what about
Through the Roof?
180
00:17:40,475 --> 00:17:44,562
Amazing! Show him your
One Armed Coolie as well!
181
00:17:44,896 --> 00:17:46,939
Nonsense, can't you tell that
old man is frozen stiff with fear?
182
00:17:47,274 --> 00:17:47,732
Take the guandao.
183
00:17:48,066 --> 00:17:48,691
Fear?
184
00:17:49,025 --> 00:17:50,234
My sifu is just
embarrassed for you!
185
00:17:50,569 --> 00:17:52,571
Let me show you some real stuff.
186
00:17:52,904 --> 00:17:54,280
Broaden your horizons.
187
00:17:55,824 --> 00:17:57,867
Advisor, what is
this dangly weapon?
188
00:17:58,201 --> 00:18:00,578
Some sort of rope dart,
but not very lethal.
189
00:18:03,582 --> 00:18:05,000
You're as ignorant as you look.
190
00:18:05,584 --> 00:18:08,169
This is a dart javelin.
191
00:18:08,503 --> 00:18:10,213
Your javelin seems awfully soft.
192
00:18:13,633 --> 00:18:16,010
Sifu, could I borrow
some Magic Water?
193
00:18:17,887 --> 00:18:19,555
Be frugal, it's hard to make.
194
00:18:20,140 --> 00:18:21,224
Sure will!
195
00:18:33,570 --> 00:18:35,071
Rope Dart?
Beat this!
196
00:18:35,488 --> 00:18:39,950
Poke, poke.
197
00:18:41,911 --> 00:18:43,037
It's real!
198
00:18:43,371 --> 00:18:44,246
It sure is!
199
00:18:50,587 --> 00:18:51,796
It's really hard.
200
00:18:52,422 --> 00:18:55,049
My lord, if you rubbed it on your
thing, imagine how hard it would get!
201
00:18:55,383 --> 00:18:57,718
-Where?
-Where you dangle.
202
00:18:58,053 --> 00:19:00,430
-Give it back to me!
-Go to hell!
203
00:19:00,764 --> 00:19:02,265
You fucking shortcake,
I'll crush you!
204
00:19:02,599 --> 00:19:03,182
Sifu
205
00:19:08,772 --> 00:19:11,691
You think just because you
look big that I'll be scared?
206
00:19:13,652 --> 00:19:15,945
My lord, it's not that
they've gotten bigger.
207
00:19:16,279 --> 00:19:17,697
You've gotten smaller!
208
00:19:18,031 --> 00:19:19,032
This isn't an illusion.
209
00:19:20,533 --> 00:19:21,992
Let's see who gets crushed now!
210
00:19:22,535 --> 00:19:23,661
Die!
211
00:19:29,417 --> 00:19:30,584
Little Turtle!
212
00:19:31,378 --> 00:19:32,295
Behave.
213
00:19:33,129 --> 00:19:34,171
Go inside.
214
00:19:39,594 --> 00:19:40,553
Please rise.
215
00:19:42,514 --> 00:19:45,016
You really are a learned man.
I am convinced.
216
00:19:45,350 --> 00:19:46,684
My lord, you're flattering me.
217
00:19:47,018 --> 00:19:48,686
-This way please.
-You first, please.
218
00:19:49,813 --> 00:19:53,525
The true purpose of my visit
Is to ask you for a favor.
219
00:19:53,858 --> 00:19:54,984
His Majesty--
220
00:19:55,443 --> 00:19:57,570
My lord has proven his dedication,
221
00:19:57,904 --> 00:19:59,405
I'll do whatever I can to help.
222
00:19:59,739 --> 00:20:01,866
-But I have one condition.
-I'll do anything!
223
00:20:03,576 --> 00:20:04,785
Will you sacrifice
224
00:20:05,120 --> 00:20:06,830
Sacrifice what?
My body?
225
00:20:07,247 --> 00:20:08,998
The condition is your life.
226
00:20:09,374 --> 00:20:10,416
My life...
227
00:20:10,750 --> 00:20:13,919
After you die, I will transform you
into a gold-plated statue.
228
00:20:14,254 --> 00:20:17,507
Because you are a high-ranking official
with protection from the Son of Heaven,
229
00:20:17,841 --> 00:20:19,008
The Demon King cannot harm you.
230
00:20:19,342 --> 00:20:21,218
Together with my student,
you will be my guards.
231
00:20:21,553 --> 00:20:24,847
This is the only way to
eradicate the Demon King.
232
00:20:25,181 --> 00:20:28,893
Hey, you're only a Taoist Priest.
You're not a pharmacist.
233
00:20:29,227 --> 00:20:32,271
Don't think I'm bullshitting. Even if
you're willing to die, I have to help you.
234
00:20:32,605 --> 00:20:36,066
You must keep your entire corpse. Otherwise
your spirit and body will be separated.
235
00:20:36,860 --> 00:20:37,861
Think it over.
236
00:20:38,278 --> 00:20:40,697
You want my life?
I'd be crazy to listen to you!
237
00:20:42,615 --> 00:20:45,117
Then consider me willing
but unable to help. Goodbye.
238
00:20:47,954 --> 00:20:49,038
Nonsense...
239
00:20:49,956 --> 00:20:51,499
-Advisor, let's go.
-Yes, sir!
240
00:20:57,338 --> 00:20:59,173
This isn't only Magic Water,
241
00:20:59,632 --> 00:21:02,092
it's Sacred Water!
242
00:21:03,762 --> 00:21:05,305
Even if it's improper,
243
00:21:05,722 --> 00:21:07,849
I have to move you.
244
00:21:09,017 --> 00:21:10,685
Come get your
Mother's spirit tablet.
245
00:21:11,019 --> 00:21:11,894
Got it!
246
00:21:12,687 --> 00:21:14,480
- I want this one!
-Your Mother had a mole.
247
00:21:14,814 --> 00:21:16,899
-That's not your Mother!
-Give it back to me!
248
00:21:17,233 --> 00:21:18,067
I like this one!
249
00:21:18,401 --> 00:21:21,237
You kids are so annoying!
They're all mothers, just take one.
250
00:21:21,571 --> 00:21:22,905
Your mother, your mother.
251
00:21:23,823 --> 00:21:24,782
Yours.
252
00:21:25,658 --> 00:21:27,284
Dad I have to pee.
253
00:21:27,619 --> 00:21:28,745
God you kids are annoying.
254
00:21:29,078 --> 00:21:31,455
I'm so tired, I'm so hungry!
255
00:21:32,332 --> 00:21:33,124
What's all this ruckus!
256
00:21:33,458 --> 00:21:34,375
I'm sleepy...
257
00:21:34,709 --> 00:21:36,627
We'll never get out
of here at this rate.
258
00:21:36,961 --> 00:21:38,170
Alright, let's take a break.
259
00:21:38,797 --> 00:21:40,256
I'm so hungry!
260
00:21:44,803 --> 00:21:45,970
Eat some bananas.
261
00:21:46,304 --> 00:21:49,724
Bananas!
262
00:22:04,823 --> 00:22:06,825
What's a day without a woman?
263
00:22:07,158 --> 00:22:08,659
And with the future
looking so bleak...
264
00:22:09,202 --> 00:22:11,245
Let's put this water to good use.
265
00:22:12,539 --> 00:22:15,291
Stay put while I go get
something to eat, got it?
266
00:22:15,625 --> 00:22:16,876
Got it!
267
00:22:17,418 --> 00:22:19,503
I want the biggest one!
268
00:22:19,838 --> 00:22:20,797
Give it to me!
269
00:22:21,130 --> 00:22:21,964
Mister!
270
00:22:22,841 --> 00:22:25,426
Come get a drink, rest awhile!
271
00:22:28,263 --> 00:22:30,682
One, two, three, four.
272
00:22:32,684 --> 00:22:35,061
Four, three, two, one.
273
00:22:35,436 --> 00:22:38,522
There are five of us,
and four bananas.
274
00:22:38,857 --> 00:22:40,316
How should we share them?
275
00:22:40,775 --> 00:22:43,611
Easy. She's the youngest
and always pees herself.
276
00:22:43,945 --> 00:22:44,820
Let's skip her.
277
00:22:45,154 --> 00:22:46,530
You're exactly the same!
278
00:22:46,865 --> 00:22:49,200
You're the eldest,
and always bullying us.
279
00:22:49,534 --> 00:22:51,118
The way I see it,
you should go without!
280
00:22:51,452 --> 00:22:52,995
You don't have to fight.
281
00:22:53,329 --> 00:22:54,747
Let me help you.
282
00:22:55,081 --> 00:22:57,166
How?
283
00:22:58,835 --> 00:23:00,253
What's taking so long?
284
00:23:04,382 --> 00:23:06,425
Can we eat yet?
285
00:23:06,759 --> 00:23:10,429
-Just a minute, I have to peel it.
-Hurry up!
286
00:23:11,681 --> 00:23:13,015
What's taking so long?
287
00:23:13,516 --> 00:23:14,517
My good sir,
288
00:23:14,851 --> 00:23:15,893
what's the rush?
289
00:23:16,227 --> 00:23:19,897
You want five girls!
It takes time.
290
00:23:21,190 --> 00:23:23,233
I'm not the Emperor
looking for concubines here!
291
00:23:24,193 --> 00:23:25,986
Oh, it's you, Lord Ma!
292
00:23:26,321 --> 00:23:28,323
What's with the costume?
293
00:23:28,781 --> 00:23:30,908
What's the problem?
Haven't you seen a plain-clothes officer?
294
00:23:31,451 --> 00:23:34,954
Yes, of course, the five girls
will be right here.
295
00:23:36,748 --> 00:23:38,833
If you were anyone else...
You'd be waiting forever!
296
00:23:39,167 --> 00:23:41,043
Are you all ready yet?
297
00:23:41,377 --> 00:23:43,504
Yes!
298
00:23:44,547 --> 00:23:47,007
It'll be glorious!
299
00:23:50,511 --> 00:23:52,221
A bite for you,
and a bite for me.
300
00:23:52,555 --> 00:23:54,557
A bite for you,
and a bite for me.
301
00:23:57,143 --> 00:23:58,811
A bite for you,
and a bite for me.
302
00:23:59,145 --> 00:24:00,771
A bite for you,
and a bite for me.
303
00:24:01,105 --> 00:24:02,940
A thrust for you,
and a thrust for you,
304
00:24:03,274 --> 00:24:04,733
and a thrust for you,
and a thrust for you!
305
00:24:05,068 --> 00:24:06,444
A bite for you,
and a bite for me.
306
00:24:06,778 --> 00:24:08,237
A bite for you,
and a bite for me.
307
00:24:08,571 --> 00:24:09,947
Left! Right!
308
00:24:10,281 --> 00:24:12,157
A thrust for you,
and a thrust for you!
309
00:24:12,659 --> 00:24:16,079
Lord Ma is legendary!
We're screwed!
310
00:24:16,412 --> 00:24:19,498
I'm terrified! What should we do?
311
00:24:19,832 --> 00:24:21,542
-You go first!
-No, you go first!
312
00:24:21,876 --> 00:24:23,794
Left! Right!
313
00:24:30,468 --> 00:24:32,261
One, two, three, four, five.
314
00:24:32,595 --> 00:24:34,430
Wasn't that fair?
315
00:24:34,764 --> 00:24:36,640
Yes!
316
00:24:36,975 --> 00:24:39,227
It's terrible! Terrible!
317
00:24:39,560 --> 00:24:42,521
Lord Ma Sheung-fung is dead!
318
00:24:42,939 --> 00:24:45,191
-Come in, come in.
-Bad news! Lord Ma is dead!
319
00:24:45,525 --> 00:24:48,444
Lord Ma Sheung-fung is dead!
320
00:24:48,861 --> 00:24:51,864
Lord Ma Sheung-fung is dead!
321
00:24:53,700 --> 00:24:54,492
Sifu!
322
00:24:54,826 --> 00:24:55,576
It's as you predicted!
323
00:24:55,910 --> 00:24:58,787
Ma Sheung-fung
died at the brothel!
324
00:24:59,122 --> 00:25:01,624
He died of over-excitement
from the Magic Water.
325
00:25:02,083 --> 00:25:03,542
This is a false death.
326
00:25:03,876 --> 00:25:07,629
Sifu, I don't see why we're wasting so
much energy on him.
327
00:25:07,964 --> 00:25:09,256
He is a military officer.
328
00:25:09,590 --> 00:25:12,217
He's strong and skilled, and
has the emperor's protection.
329
00:25:12,552 --> 00:25:15,096
He's useful. From now on, the two of you
will be my Left-Right Guards.
330
00:25:15,430 --> 00:25:16,055
What?
331
00:25:16,514 --> 00:25:19,183
He is essential in our
fight against the Demon King.
332
00:25:19,559 --> 00:25:20,601
Time is running out.
333
00:25:20,935 --> 00:25:22,937
He's still under the magic
water's spell, let's get going.
334
00:25:23,396 --> 00:25:24,438
Yes, Sifu.
335
00:25:35,074 --> 00:25:37,284
You can stop looking around, Ma Sheung-fung
336
00:25:37,618 --> 00:25:40,954
I'm here to tell you you died in action
in the brothel.
337
00:25:41,497 --> 00:25:44,124
I'm dead?
You're crazy!
338
00:25:44,459 --> 00:25:45,543
I am unstoppable!
339
00:25:45,877 --> 00:25:49,213
You've got a screw loose!
You'll die before me!
340
00:25:50,631 --> 00:25:51,840
-Lord Ma,
-Enough!
341
00:25:52,175 --> 00:25:53,968
You're trying to fool
me with illusions again?
342
00:25:54,302 --> 00:25:57,179
People have been trying to scare me
since I was in my mother's womb!
343
00:25:57,513 --> 00:25:59,681
You don't believe me?
Take a look.
344
00:26:02,560 --> 00:26:03,978
How does it look, Lord Ma?
345
00:26:09,734 --> 00:26:10,818
Trying to fool me?
346
00:26:11,277 --> 00:26:13,153
It does look quite like me.
347
00:26:13,488 --> 00:26:16,199
Looks like you?
He is you!
348
00:26:18,534 --> 00:26:20,702
Nonsense, then who am I?
349
00:26:21,204 --> 00:26:24,874
You're the soul.
What you see there is your corpse.
350
00:26:27,752 --> 00:26:28,669
You don't believe us?
351
00:26:31,214 --> 00:26:33,841
It won't hurt, even
if I punch you!
352
00:26:34,175 --> 00:26:35,759
Nothing hurts!
Punches! Slaps!
353
00:26:36,886 --> 00:26:37,845
Hey!
354
00:26:38,179 --> 00:26:40,181
Are you crazy? How dare
you beat me up like that?
355
00:26:46,479 --> 00:26:48,439
Hey, what can you
find out with just that?
356
00:26:48,773 --> 00:26:49,899
Let me!
357
00:26:50,316 --> 00:26:51,692
Front somersault!
358
00:26:52,026 --> 00:26:55,029
Back somersault!
Body slam!
359
00:26:56,197 --> 00:26:57,323
Delightful!
360
00:26:57,657 --> 00:26:58,949
Another front somersault!
361
00:26:59,283 --> 00:27:01,660
And another back somersault!
Crush, crush!
362
00:27:02,787 --> 00:27:03,662
This is so fun!
363
00:27:03,996 --> 00:27:06,665
Stomp, wiggle,
stomp, wiggle...
364
00:27:08,292 --> 00:27:10,711
This is a once in a lifetime
opportunity, for the final effort,
365
00:27:13,673 --> 00:27:16,467
Are you insane? How dare you
stomp me like that! I'll kill you!
366
00:27:20,471 --> 00:27:22,139
So you finally believe.
367
00:27:24,559 --> 00:27:25,643
I'm dead?
368
00:27:26,894 --> 00:27:27,978
Now what?
369
00:27:28,354 --> 00:27:30,731
I'm really dead?
I don't want to be dead!
370
00:27:31,065 --> 00:27:32,024
I don't want to be dead!
371
00:27:32,358 --> 00:27:33,609
Help me!
372
00:27:33,943 --> 00:27:36,445
Please, Taoist Priest, please save me.
373
00:27:36,779 --> 00:27:37,571
You need not be sad.
374
00:27:37,905 --> 00:27:39,448
This was fated.
375
00:27:39,782 --> 00:27:42,993
I understand you were
a good official in your life.
376
00:27:43,327 --> 00:27:45,537
So I have called
back your spirit.
377
00:27:46,998 --> 00:27:49,375
Yes, you are now a god.
378
00:27:49,709 --> 00:27:52,378
Don't you feel powerful?
379
00:27:55,506 --> 00:27:56,715
Generals Gold and Silver!
380
00:27:57,049 --> 00:27:57,883
Yes!
381
00:27:58,509 --> 00:27:59,218
Yes...
382
00:27:59,677 --> 00:28:03,180
I hereby declare you my Left-Right guards.
383
00:28:03,514 --> 00:28:05,974
To work together to kill
the Demon King.
384
00:28:06,309 --> 00:28:09,020
I vow to always remain at your side.
385
00:28:31,042 --> 00:28:32,501
Sifu, the demon is arriving.
386
00:28:35,463 --> 00:28:36,380
Be careful!
387
00:28:46,015 --> 00:28:46,724
Retreat!
388
00:29:06,494 --> 00:29:07,411
Last one out is the loser!
389
00:29:28,557 --> 00:29:29,266
Sisi!
390
00:29:29,600 --> 00:29:31,226
She's a demon
concubine now, idiot.
391
00:29:40,861 --> 00:29:42,529
-Let's go help!
-Okay!
392
00:29:46,367 --> 00:29:47,785
Sifu, she's powerful!
393
00:29:48,119 --> 00:29:48,828
Be careful.
394
00:30:14,562 --> 00:30:16,021
Where do you think you're going?
395
00:31:07,156 --> 00:31:08,657
I can't see anything!
Now what?
396
00:31:08,991 --> 00:31:09,866
Light the flares!
397
00:31:21,295 --> 00:31:22,754
Moonlight Mirror!
398
00:31:27,426 --> 00:31:28,677
Sifu, is it over?
399
00:31:29,011 --> 00:31:31,555
No, he'll be back. Get into position
for the ritual.
400
00:31:31,889 --> 00:31:32,681
Alright!
401
00:31:49,865 --> 00:31:52,284
Get into position
for the Treasure Mirror Ritual.
402
00:31:52,993 --> 00:31:56,746
You must not leave your position.
Otherwise, the gates to Heaven will open.
403
00:31:57,081 --> 00:31:59,541
At that point, it'll be
beyond our control.
404
00:32:01,377 --> 00:32:02,419
-Prepare!
-Yes!
405
00:32:02,795 --> 00:32:03,545
Yes!
406
00:32:06,006 --> 00:32:06,756
Light the fire!
407
00:32:14,306 --> 00:32:15,307
Firebomb!
408
00:32:24,900 --> 00:32:25,984
Moonlight Mirrors!
409
00:32:26,735 --> 00:32:30,613
Heaven is vast and the Earth is ash. Sun,
Moon, give me your enchanted light!
410
00:32:36,370 --> 00:32:37,496
Capture the demon!
411
00:32:48,966 --> 00:32:49,800
Shoot!
412
00:32:52,219 --> 00:32:53,470
Oh shit!
413
00:33:00,060 --> 00:33:01,853
Sifu, now what?
414
00:33:02,188 --> 00:33:03,939
Remain calm and
stay in position!
415
00:33:09,570 --> 00:33:10,904
No! Don't leave your position!
416
00:33:18,871 --> 00:33:21,456
Sifu, help!
What's happening?
417
00:33:25,127 --> 00:33:26,503
Sifu, now what?
418
00:33:28,756 --> 00:33:31,383
It's out of my hands,
the gates of Heaven are open!
419
00:34:32,903 --> 00:34:35,739
Demon King, why won't you die?
What are you waiting for?
420
00:34:38,367 --> 00:34:39,534
You're right on time.
421
00:34:45,291 --> 00:34:46,375
Get down!
422
00:34:49,169 --> 00:34:51,212
Hey, this isn't what the
action director planned!
423
00:34:51,547 --> 00:34:52,714
I planned it.
424
00:34:55,175 --> 00:34:57,051
Hey, hey!
425
00:34:59,305 --> 00:35:00,306
There's no escape!
426
00:35:01,432 --> 00:35:02,349
Pull!
427
00:35:04,602 --> 00:35:05,352
Cut!
428
00:35:08,522 --> 00:35:10,273
Hey, are you kidding me?
429
00:35:10,608 --> 00:35:12,443
Why didn't you warn me
he was going to use a real sword?
430
00:35:12,776 --> 00:35:15,153
Hey! Where's this old man from?
431
00:35:15,487 --> 00:35:16,154
Where's Monkey?
432
00:35:16,488 --> 00:35:18,406
Excuse me, I was
just in the bathroom.
433
00:35:18,741 --> 00:35:19,825
Are we ready to shoot?
434
00:35:20,159 --> 00:35:21,785
You're fired!
435
00:35:22,411 --> 00:35:24,579
Hey man, at this rate,
I'll never make it to the other set.
436
00:35:24,913 --> 00:35:26,164
Figure it out before
you call me again.
437
00:35:27,416 --> 00:35:28,375
Oh please!
438
00:35:28,709 --> 00:35:30,585
Director, I think he stopped breathing.
439
00:35:30,919 --> 00:35:31,961
Make the call then.
440
00:35:32,296 --> 00:35:33,130
Call an ambulance?
441
00:35:33,631 --> 00:35:35,674
Call the journalists
for the publicity!
442
00:35:36,300 --> 00:35:37,718
Place a camera here.
443
00:35:38,052 --> 00:35:40,095
Pick the guy up,
then throw him down.
444
00:35:40,429 --> 00:35:42,389
While we have him,
let's get a second shot!
445
00:35:42,890 --> 00:35:45,350
I don't know, I think she
had an appointment today.
446
00:35:45,684 --> 00:35:47,894
Did you really tell
Dr. Wong I called?
447
00:35:48,228 --> 00:35:50,146
-Yes, she said she's in a meeting.
-A meeting?
448
00:35:50,481 --> 00:35:52,065
Why does she have so many meetings?
449
00:35:52,399 --> 00:35:53,858
You liar, I say--
450
00:35:54,193 --> 00:35:54,985
Hello?
451
00:36:36,110 --> 00:36:40,610
X The Lord God brings true happiness X
452
00:36:46,412 --> 00:36:50,912
X May God bless your work X
453
00:36:52,626 --> 00:36:57,126
X May God bless your home K
454
00:36:57,548 --> 00:37:02,048
X May God gift you true perfection X
455
00:37:05,431 --> 00:37:09,931
X May God bless your hope X
456
00:37:11,145 --> 00:37:15,645
X May God bless your music K
457
00:37:17,192 --> 00:37:21,692
X May God bless your aspirations X
458
00:37:22,489 --> 00:37:26,989
X May God bless your -- X
459
00:37:29,413 --> 00:37:33,041
X May God bless your aspirations X
460
00:37:33,375 --> 00:37:37,875
X May God bless your joy X
461
00:37:52,019 --> 00:37:53,562
Father, what should we do?
462
00:37:53,896 --> 00:37:55,105
What.. What?
463
00:37:56,982 --> 00:37:58,358
Almighty God,
464
00:37:58,692 --> 00:38:01,319
May you please aid your believers
In exorcising these demons.
465
00:38:10,037 --> 00:38:11,455
That hurts!
466
00:38:11,789 --> 00:38:12,706
Run!
467
00:38:14,082 --> 00:38:14,707
Demon!
468
00:38:15,042 --> 00:38:17,711
You are powerless in the
face of an almighty God!
469
00:38:18,212 --> 00:38:19,796
It hurts!
470
00:38:23,217 --> 00:38:24,927
Run! What are you waiting for?
471
00:38:25,260 --> 00:38:27,345
Don't go! I haven't exorcised the demon!
472
00:38:27,888 --> 00:38:28,638
Now what?
473
00:38:29,515 --> 00:38:30,265
It won't open!
474
00:38:30,599 --> 00:38:33,226
Are you stupid?
You'll break the door!
475
00:38:33,560 --> 00:38:34,686
Open it like that!
476
00:38:35,020 --> 00:38:36,146
-Let's go!
-Thanks!
477
00:38:36,522 --> 00:38:37,397
Hey!
478
00:39:35,539 --> 00:39:37,791
(What's happening?)
(Are you crazy?)
479
00:39:38,709 --> 00:39:39,751
Stop right there!
480
00:39:43,589 --> 00:39:44,506
Huh? Iron foot?
481
00:39:47,301 --> 00:39:50,429
Why are you attacking him?
Are you crazy?
482
00:39:54,892 --> 00:39:56,935
Freeze, freeze!
483
00:40:01,231 --> 00:40:02,440
Where do you think you're going?
484
00:40:05,402 --> 00:40:06,903
He's insane!
Lock him up!
485
00:40:07,237 --> 00:40:09,739
Who are you with?
How dare you treat me like this?
486
00:40:10,073 --> 00:40:12,241
-At least he's consistently insane.
-Sure is.
487
00:40:12,576 --> 00:40:15,120
We're the Hong Kong Royal Police!
488
00:40:17,998 --> 00:40:19,749
What will you do with me?
489
00:40:20,083 --> 00:40:21,084
Put you in a car!
490
00:40:21,418 --> 00:40:22,210
Let's go!
491
00:40:22,544 --> 00:40:26,005
Where are your manners?
I demand to see the local official!
492
00:40:26,340 --> 00:40:27,841
Announce my arrival!
493
00:40:28,175 --> 00:40:29,593
Can you hear me?
494
00:40:36,683 --> 00:40:39,519
Father, we've no idea who those two are.
They're dressed funny too.
495
00:40:39,853 --> 00:40:41,729
They won't open the door
no matter how long I knock.
496
00:40:42,064 --> 00:40:44,900
And you're still feeding them?
Aren't you afraid?
497
00:40:46,026 --> 00:40:48,486
Father, should we call the police?
498
00:40:49,488 --> 00:40:52,866
If our Almighty God has
space in his heart for demons,
499
00:40:53,200 --> 00:40:54,576
who are we to disagree?
500
00:40:54,952 --> 00:40:57,079
The characters are so small...
Bad for my eyes.
501
00:40:58,413 --> 00:40:59,831
What kind of book is this?
502
00:41:00,248 --> 00:41:02,333
I don't understand
a single word.
503
00:41:02,668 --> 00:41:03,710
I give up.
504
00:41:07,506 --> 00:41:10,592
Where are we? And where is Sifu?
505
00:41:10,926 --> 00:41:11,968
I told you,
506
00:41:12,302 --> 00:41:13,970
you have a screw loose somewhere.
507
00:41:14,304 --> 00:41:16,306
We're in the Demon King's illusion.
508
00:41:17,808 --> 00:41:21,645
At this rate, even if we don't die today,
we'll die tomorrow.
509
00:41:21,979 --> 00:41:23,105
You're dead already!
510
00:41:23,480 --> 00:41:25,440
You're a god!
511
00:41:25,774 --> 00:41:29,277
Gods inhale delicious smells,
people eat delicious foods.
512
00:41:29,611 --> 00:41:31,195
Why would you get hungry?
513
00:41:47,796 --> 00:41:49,672
Hey little guy, you
must be hungry. Eat up!
514
00:41:50,007 --> 00:41:51,466
Yeah! Eat up, eat up.
515
00:41:51,800 --> 00:41:54,469
It's delicious!
No need to be polite! Go on, take it!
516
00:42:00,934 --> 00:42:02,018
Sihing,
(Senior male classmate)
517
00:42:02,352 --> 00:42:05,688
Do you know why you're so short?
Because you eat alone.
518
00:42:06,023 --> 00:42:07,858
I told you gods
inhale delicious smells.
519
00:42:08,191 --> 00:42:10,401
Here, I'll let you smell it, alright?
520
00:42:17,159 --> 00:42:19,327
How is it? Do you feel less hungry?
521
00:42:19,661 --> 00:42:21,537
Sihing, it's not working...
522
00:42:21,872 --> 00:42:23,331
Sorry, I guess I can't help.
523
00:42:23,665 --> 00:42:24,457
Sihing...
524
00:42:24,791 --> 00:42:26,209
I've discovered a problem.
525
00:42:26,626 --> 00:42:27,460
Go on.
526
00:42:27,753 --> 00:42:30,881
I feel it very very
deeply in my body
527
00:42:31,214 --> 00:42:32,924
it's better to be a
man than a god, come!
528
00:42:33,258 --> 00:42:34,425
Hey! No cheating!
529
00:42:34,760 --> 00:42:37,220
You can't eat this! Just sniff it!
530
00:42:42,893 --> 00:42:44,644
Big Brother, can
we start playing yet?
531
00:42:45,145 --> 00:42:46,896
How many times do
I have to tell you,
532
00:42:47,230 --> 00:42:48,606
when we play this game,
call me Your Honor?
533
00:42:48,940 --> 00:42:49,815
Sorry, Big Brother!
534
00:42:50,150 --> 00:42:51,025
Your Honor!
535
00:42:51,735 --> 00:42:53,528
I won't do it again, Big Brother!
536
00:42:54,738 --> 00:42:56,448
SECRETARY, JUDGE, PROSECUTOR
537
00:42:58,158 --> 00:42:59,075
DEFENSE LAWYER
538
00:42:59,409 --> 00:43:01,411
Don't worry, I can help you.
539
00:43:02,954 --> 00:43:05,122
What's his crime?
540
00:43:06,875 --> 00:43:09,711
I heard he caused a
public disturbance at the hospital.
541
00:43:10,045 --> 00:43:11,296
It's a serious offense!
542
00:43:13,090 --> 00:43:15,342
Earhustle, well done.
543
00:43:15,675 --> 00:43:16,759
Take a sip.
544
00:43:17,094 --> 00:43:18,470
Thank you, Your Honor!
545
00:43:20,263 --> 00:43:23,641
I hereby charge you with
546
00:43:24,351 --> 00:43:26,603
instigating unrest...
547
00:43:27,104 --> 00:43:29,815
Instigating unrest!
Do you plead guilty?
548
00:43:34,444 --> 00:43:36,028
Silence means
you're pleading guilty!
549
00:43:36,363 --> 00:43:38,490
I sentence you to death!
How does that sound to you?
550
00:43:40,117 --> 00:43:42,702
No opinion? Really no opinion?
551
00:43:43,036 --> 00:43:44,328
Execution!
552
00:43:44,955 --> 00:43:45,872
DECAPITATE
553
00:43:56,800 --> 00:43:59,594
I'm so sorry,
I couldn't help you.
554
00:44:09,020 --> 00:44:12,648
Big brother!
The Demoness is here!
555
00:44:14,818 --> 00:44:16,945
Mission Demon Hunting!
556
00:44:17,612 --> 00:44:19,071
Pretend to be asleep!
557
00:44:24,786 --> 00:44:25,828
I'm asleep.
558
00:44:54,649 --> 00:44:56,817
Miss Sisi! You're alive!
559
00:44:57,152 --> 00:44:59,320
How do you feel? It's nap time right now.
560
00:44:59,654 --> 00:45:00,571
You're not Sisi.
561
00:45:01,156 --> 00:45:02,448
You're the Demon King's concubine.
562
00:45:02,782 --> 00:45:04,700
And now I am
enchanted by your magic.
563
00:45:05,035 --> 00:45:05,994
I have nothing to say.
564
00:45:06,328 --> 00:45:08,413
Kill me if you must,
there's nothing to say.
565
00:45:08,747 --> 00:45:11,750
I'm not a demon's concubine. and even if I
were, I wouldn't kill you.
566
00:45:12,083 --> 00:45:14,627
Now, will you be
a good boy and take a nice nap?
567
00:45:14,961 --> 00:45:16,128
Dr. Wong!
568
00:45:16,504 --> 00:45:18,589
Dr. Wong, Dr. Wong!
569
00:45:18,924 --> 00:45:20,383
Your precious patients
570
00:45:20,717 --> 00:45:22,552
keep taking apart my mops!
571
00:45:22,886 --> 00:45:24,679
How am I supposed to do my job!?
572
00:45:25,013 --> 00:45:28,349
Ma'am, I'll tell my supervisors.
Just clean up their room first.
573
00:45:30,727 --> 00:45:34,188
So what if you tell them...
it doesn't help clean the floors.
574
00:45:39,611 --> 00:45:40,987
So your name is Cho Lo!
575
00:45:41,321 --> 00:45:44,032
You're such a brave warrior!
576
00:45:47,494 --> 00:45:49,662
Take a sip!
577
00:45:52,332 --> 00:45:54,083
From now on, we're brothers.
578
00:45:54,417 --> 00:45:55,251
Yeah! Good brothers!
579
00:45:55,585 --> 00:45:57,795
Let's form a blood alliance
when we have a spare moment.
580
00:45:58,546 --> 00:46:00,005
What era are we in?
581
00:46:00,382 --> 00:46:01,466
Who are you people?
582
00:46:03,051 --> 00:46:04,469
Let me answer
your first question.
583
00:46:04,803 --> 00:46:07,430
-It's now...
-1991.
584
00:46:07,847 --> 00:46:08,764
It's 1991!
585
00:46:09,099 --> 00:46:11,351
So six more years
before we emigrate!
586
00:46:13,603 --> 00:46:15,521
And now, for the second question.
587
00:46:15,855 --> 00:46:17,314
You and I are the
same kind of people.
588
00:46:17,649 --> 00:46:20,818
But the crazy people
outside say we're insane!
589
00:46:21,319 --> 00:46:22,445
Who's the emperor now?
590
00:46:24,364 --> 00:46:25,323
Jiang...
591
00:46:25,657 --> 00:46:26,699
Jiang Zemin!
592
00:46:27,325 --> 00:46:28,242
Jiang Zemin?
593
00:46:29,286 --> 00:46:31,162
Not Li Shimin?
594
00:46:31,496 --> 00:46:32,413
Simon Li?
595
00:46:32,747 --> 00:46:34,290
He's been dead for a thousand years!
596
00:46:36,793 --> 00:46:39,003
Have you seen my two students?
Have you seen them?
597
00:46:39,337 --> 00:46:39,837
Students?
598
00:46:40,171 --> 00:46:41,547
You have two students?
599
00:46:41,881 --> 00:46:43,299
WHERE ARE YOU?
600
00:46:46,928 --> 00:46:48,930
Be quiet! He's doing
a transfiguration!
601
00:46:59,566 --> 00:47:00,900
Brother Cho Lo!
602
00:47:01,234 --> 00:47:02,944
You're trained in the dark arts?
603
00:47:03,278 --> 00:47:05,613
Nonsense! Taoism and the dark arts
are in an eternal battle.
604
00:47:05,947 --> 00:47:07,281
This is not magic.
It's Taoism.
605
00:47:07,615 --> 00:47:08,616
Taoism?
606
00:47:22,756 --> 00:47:26,468
To starve like this...
607
00:47:26,801 --> 00:47:28,636
even a snake would die.
608
00:47:38,355 --> 00:47:39,773
Roasted pigeon?
609
00:47:49,074 --> 00:47:50,075
I told you you're a god.
610
00:47:50,408 --> 00:47:51,283
Gods inhale delicious smells.
611
00:47:51,618 --> 00:47:52,994
You don't have to eat,
give it to me.
612
00:47:54,996 --> 00:47:57,039
How dare you steal my pigeon!
613
00:47:57,749 --> 00:48:00,334
God, god, god...
Haven't you heard of the God of Cookery?
614
00:48:04,923 --> 00:48:07,467
You're in trouble now!
This is Sifu's courier pigeon!
615
00:48:07,801 --> 00:48:08,468
Hand it over!
616
00:48:09,844 --> 00:48:11,178
Where art thou?
617
00:48:12,222 --> 00:48:13,723
Cult leader, cult leader,
618
00:48:14,057 --> 00:48:14,766
cult leader?
619
00:48:15,642 --> 00:48:16,601
Cult leader!
620
00:48:22,107 --> 00:48:22,982
Cult leader!
621
00:48:23,316 --> 00:48:25,484
Little man, you can't call me that.
622
00:48:25,819 --> 00:48:28,071
You may call me Father.
623
00:48:28,405 --> 00:48:29,197
Flower?
624
00:48:29,739 --> 00:48:31,949
A man named Flower?
Who cares!
625
00:48:32,283 --> 00:48:34,535
May I ask where we are?
626
00:48:34,869 --> 00:48:36,745
This is the Lord's house.
627
00:48:39,958 --> 00:48:42,293
The Lord's house?
628
00:48:42,627 --> 00:48:45,004
Flower must have meant
their lord's house!
629
00:48:45,338 --> 00:48:48,382
SIFU, WE WAIT AT
THE LORD'S HOUSE.
630
00:48:56,891 --> 00:48:57,933
It's not working...
631
00:49:02,021 --> 00:49:03,814
Thankfully no one saw that...
632
00:49:04,149 --> 00:49:05,483
that'd be so embarrassing...
633
00:49:05,817 --> 00:49:07,276
I'd be done for!
634
00:49:17,370 --> 00:49:18,496
Fire!
635
00:49:22,959 --> 00:49:24,168
What? Never seen this?
636
00:49:24,502 --> 00:49:26,462
Of course not!
637
00:49:26,880 --> 00:49:28,214
Look, Father!
638
00:49:28,715 --> 00:49:30,842
Oh my God!
639
00:49:32,177 --> 00:49:33,887
Where's my collector's edition!
640
00:49:34,220 --> 00:49:35,346
Is it this one?
641
00:49:38,016 --> 00:49:38,850
Oh no!
642
00:49:39,184 --> 00:49:40,977
My one comic book is done for!
643
00:49:41,352 --> 00:49:42,728
Serves you right for reading that trash!
644
00:49:43,062 --> 00:49:44,354
What happened?
645
00:49:47,525 --> 00:49:48,484
Is that really okay?
646
00:49:48,818 --> 00:49:50,152
Of course it's not okay!
647
00:49:51,154 --> 00:49:52,196
You're no longer welcome here!
648
00:49:54,449 --> 00:49:56,117
Yummy yummy in my tummy,
649
00:49:56,451 --> 00:49:58,119
none for the puppy next to me.
650
00:49:58,453 --> 00:50:01,289
Sidai, Sidai, let's share!
(junior male classmate)
651
00:50:01,623 --> 00:50:03,374
You can have it
if you can reach it!
652
00:50:03,708 --> 00:50:04,959
Hey, hey!
653
00:50:05,293 --> 00:50:06,877
You're awful, why
won't you hand it over!
654
00:50:07,212 --> 00:50:08,129
Hey, hey!
655
00:50:25,355 --> 00:50:26,856
You were eaten by Ma Sheung Fung?
656
00:50:34,531 --> 00:50:36,199
Where are those two?
657
00:50:38,117 --> 00:50:40,828
What shoddy work...
Looks nothing like a pigeon.
658
00:50:50,838 --> 00:50:52,548
Their lord's house?
659
00:50:52,882 --> 00:50:54,925
Could the two be with the Emperor?
660
00:51:08,147 --> 00:51:09,231
I'm superman!
661
00:51:09,566 --> 00:51:10,358
Let's go.
662
00:51:10,984 --> 00:51:11,609
Walk!
663
00:51:11,943 --> 00:51:14,028
-Superman has to fly!
-Hey, stop!
664
00:51:14,612 --> 00:51:15,571
Stop!
665
00:51:47,437 --> 00:51:49,021
Nurse-on-duty!
666
00:51:49,355 --> 00:51:51,648
Please admit the patient
at the main gate!
667
00:51:57,822 --> 00:51:59,782
How could they ask us to
admit a patient at this hour?
668
00:52:00,116 --> 00:52:01,909
-Exactly!
-Ludicrous!
669
00:52:02,243 --> 00:52:03,827
We need to rest too!
670
00:52:12,086 --> 00:52:13,295
Here comes superman!
671
00:52:13,630 --> 00:52:15,048
Where you off to?
672
00:52:15,882 --> 00:52:19,760
You're dressed nicely... How did you know
we were having a party?
673
00:52:20,094 --> 00:52:21,637
Do you know where the Emperor lives?
674
00:52:23,264 --> 00:52:25,641
I know, in the Mediterranean Sea!
675
00:52:25,975 --> 00:52:28,185
-And where's that?
-I can take you there, alright?
676
00:52:28,519 --> 00:52:30,020
HAPPY BIRTHDAY
BIG BROTHER
677
00:52:31,147 --> 00:52:33,691
Brother Cho Lo, we've been
waiting so long for you!
678
00:52:34,025 --> 00:52:34,984
This is it?
679
00:52:35,318 --> 00:52:37,486
There's orange, there's green,
and we're the ocean!
680
00:52:37,945 --> 00:52:38,695
Brother Cho Lo,
681
00:52:39,030 --> 00:52:41,574
welcome to our ball!
682
00:52:41,908 --> 00:52:44,327
Let's dance! Party!
683
00:52:47,914 --> 00:52:50,207
They're all crazy!
684
00:52:54,253 --> 00:52:55,504
Illusion box?
685
00:52:57,423 --> 00:52:59,800
Demon King, you've finally
revealed yourself!
686
00:53:00,593 --> 00:53:02,595
Let's play Tug-of-War!
687
00:53:02,929 --> 00:53:03,930
Yeah!
688
00:53:04,263 --> 00:53:06,848
Tug-of-War!
689
00:53:07,684 --> 00:53:09,769
Hey! He can play the accordion!
690
00:53:32,542 --> 00:53:34,794
Big Brother, this Taoist geezer is amazing!
691
00:53:35,128 --> 00:53:39,006
What Taoist geezer?
He's now our Big-Big Brother!
692
00:53:39,340 --> 00:53:40,507
Hey! What are you doing?
693
00:53:40,842 --> 00:53:43,052
The riot police are here!
Scary, scary!
694
00:53:44,595 --> 00:53:45,846
The riot police!
695
00:53:46,180 --> 00:53:46,722
Scary!
696
00:53:47,849 --> 00:53:50,518
Until now, we still
don't know who you are.
697
00:53:51,477 --> 00:53:53,645
We only know you're a stuntman.
698
00:53:55,982 --> 00:53:57,608
Why do you look at me like that?
699
00:53:58,860 --> 00:54:03,360
I told you, I'm not a demon's concubine.
Nor am I Sisi. My name is Gigi.
700
00:54:07,452 --> 00:54:10,329
I'm a psychiatrist here. I will do
my best to help you.
701
00:54:18,045 --> 00:54:21,548
Since we're cut from the same cloth,
why keep me tied up?
702
00:54:21,883 --> 00:54:24,510
Don't worry, they'll
let you go soon enough.
703
00:54:24,844 --> 00:54:26,220
No need to be so afraid.
704
00:54:29,056 --> 00:54:30,098
You...
705
00:54:30,433 --> 00:54:32,143
Do you really hate TV?
706
00:54:32,477 --> 00:54:34,562
Or do you hate the image?
707
00:54:42,653 --> 00:54:43,862
Illusion box?
708
00:55:24,028 --> 00:55:25,112
Come down!
709
00:55:25,446 --> 00:55:27,156
That's dangerous!
710
00:55:27,490 --> 00:55:28,657
Come down now!
711
00:55:39,544 --> 00:55:41,587
Are you alright?
Here's let's get you up.
712
00:55:48,886 --> 00:55:50,762
If you're not a demon,
then you're Sisi.
713
00:55:51,097 --> 00:55:53,307
But when did you
achieve this level of Tao?
714
00:55:53,641 --> 00:55:56,852
With a mere wave of your hand,
you were able to
715
00:55:57,228 --> 00:55:59,480
summon and dismiss
the Demon King.
716
00:56:01,065 --> 00:56:02,566
Actually, I'd also like to know
717
00:56:02,900 --> 00:56:06,028
why do you sometimes called me
"Sisi" and sometimes a demon?
718
00:56:06,362 --> 00:56:08,405
Can you tell me?
- Of course.
719
00:56:27,466 --> 00:56:29,301
-Oh, it's you.
-Yes.
720
00:56:29,677 --> 00:56:31,387
Big-Big Brother.
721
00:56:31,721 --> 00:56:32,972
Greet him!
722
00:56:33,764 --> 00:56:36,892
-Big-Big Brother...
-Rise.
723
00:56:37,226 --> 00:56:38,894
Just call me
Taoist Geezer.
724
00:56:39,228 --> 00:56:41,855
Brother Cho Lo, I thought you were going
to rescue your students?
725
00:56:42,189 --> 00:56:44,191
We came to save you!
726
00:56:44,525 --> 00:56:46,360
We brought your belongings.
727
00:56:47,403 --> 00:56:48,153
Thank you.
728
00:56:48,487 --> 00:56:50,030
Big Brother,
there's no one here!
729
00:56:53,534 --> 00:56:55,661
Of course there's no one.
Even a crazy person could tell.
730
00:56:55,995 --> 00:57:00,495
Big-Big Brother, you better get going.
The gate is that way.
731
00:57:01,167 --> 00:57:04,503
Yeah, or it'll be too late!
732
00:57:05,630 --> 00:57:06,464
Brothers,
733
00:57:06,797 --> 00:57:10,550
once I have found my two students,
I will be back to rescue you.
734
00:57:13,095 --> 00:57:14,679
Please don't!
735
00:57:15,014 --> 00:57:16,515
Scary, scary!
736
00:57:17,183 --> 00:57:21,683
People out there are
crazier than we are!
737
00:57:22,229 --> 00:57:26,729
It's dangerous out there!
Here, take this.
738
00:57:27,151 --> 00:57:31,238
Yeah, with this, you don't need
to fold courier pigeons anymore!
739
00:57:31,572 --> 00:57:32,573
Yeah!
740
00:57:33,199 --> 00:57:35,826
It's too great a gift. I bid you goodbye.
741
00:57:36,911 --> 00:57:37,828
Adieu!
742
00:57:43,834 --> 00:57:45,085
Goodbye!
743
00:57:45,419 --> 00:57:46,253
Goodbye!
744
00:57:46,587 --> 00:57:49,298
-Take care.
-Take care!
745
00:57:51,300 --> 00:57:54,261
- Brother Keung, please open the gate.
- Sure thing, why are you so late?
746
00:57:54,595 --> 00:57:56,847
- Have you had your midnight snack?
- Yeah!
747
00:58:00,726 --> 00:58:02,144
-Thank you!
-No worries.
748
00:58:13,864 --> 00:58:15,782
Hey, Gigi, why so late tonight?
749
00:58:16,117 --> 00:58:17,576
I was planing on leaving earlier,
750
00:58:17,910 --> 00:58:20,162
but I ended up speaking with
a patient for a very long time.
751
00:58:20,496 --> 00:58:22,664
Gigi, your trunk isn't closed.
752
00:58:22,999 --> 00:58:25,001
Get home safe, goodnight!
753
00:58:25,376 --> 00:58:26,627
Thanks, goodnight.
754
00:58:27,878 --> 00:58:29,129
What's wrong with tonight...
755
00:59:01,871 --> 00:59:03,914
Miss, your license please.
756
00:59:10,713 --> 00:59:12,005
Miss, may I take a look?
757
00:59:12,381 --> 00:59:13,131
Sure.
758
00:59:17,303 --> 00:59:18,220
The puppy is pretty cute!
759
00:59:19,472 --> 00:59:20,473
It's just a cheap mongrel.
760
00:59:20,806 --> 00:59:21,640
Still pretty cute.
761
00:59:28,314 --> 00:59:29,565
Not bad...
762
00:59:29,899 --> 00:59:32,067
How did you get in here
without me knowing?
763
00:59:34,070 --> 00:59:36,655
Since you're such a good boy...
I'll take you home.
764
00:59:45,498 --> 00:59:48,083
Good boy, stay.
765
01:00:02,598 --> 01:00:03,599
Puppy,
766
01:00:04,809 --> 01:00:05,726
Good boy.
767
01:00:08,020 --> 01:00:08,895
Good boy...
768
01:00:12,483 --> 01:00:16,111
Gigi, it's Dr. Leung. I read your report.
769
01:00:16,445 --> 01:00:19,531
According to the information
from Psychiatry, there may be some issues.
770
01:00:19,865 --> 01:00:22,492
Let's let the Dean decide when we meet.
771
01:00:24,662 --> 01:00:26,246
Gigi, it's Ah Ying.
772
01:00:26,580 --> 01:00:30,292
Don't forget we have a meeting
with Dr. Cheung at 7p.m. this Friday.
773
01:00:31,085 --> 01:00:33,962
Gigi, I know you're hiding from me.
774
01:00:34,296 --> 01:00:37,090
You won't answer
when I call the hospital.
775
01:00:37,424 --> 01:00:39,259
Your resistance is futile.
Let me tell you--
776
01:01:20,176 --> 01:01:23,137
No! What are you doing? Let me go!
777
01:01:24,305 --> 01:01:25,431
No!
778
01:01:27,266 --> 01:01:30,727
I used to love playing
with you like this!
779
01:01:31,061 --> 01:01:32,771
And now you won't
even kiss me back!
780
01:01:40,696 --> 01:01:41,697
Gigi!
781
01:01:44,450 --> 01:01:45,742
Did I scare you?
782
01:01:46,785 --> 01:01:48,119
Here's a flower for you.
783
01:02:00,382 --> 01:02:02,842
Gigi, you know I've
never stopped loving you.
784
01:02:03,177 --> 01:02:04,553
How many times
do I have to tell you,
785
01:02:04,929 --> 01:02:06,263
we're through!
786
01:02:06,597 --> 01:02:08,473
I no longer love you!
787
01:02:08,807 --> 01:02:10,350
Stop tormenting me!
788
01:02:10,684 --> 01:02:13,144
You're lying!
I know you still love me!
789
01:02:13,646 --> 01:02:15,147
I know I was a little crazy before...
790
01:02:15,481 --> 01:02:16,398
but I can change!
791
01:02:16,732 --> 01:02:19,484
Believe me, marry me.
Come back to me.
792
01:02:20,486 --> 01:02:21,445
Gigi!
793
01:02:45,177 --> 01:02:46,178
Are you crazy?
794
01:02:47,888 --> 01:02:49,139
You like hitting?
795
01:02:49,848 --> 01:02:50,849
Keep hitting!
796
01:02:51,350 --> 01:02:52,142
Go on!
797
01:02:52,768 --> 01:02:53,560
No!
798
01:03:08,867 --> 01:03:10,910
You fucking dog, I'm going to kill you!
799
01:03:14,915 --> 01:03:15,874
What the...?
800
01:03:18,335 --> 01:03:19,210
Stop following me!
801
01:03:37,146 --> 01:03:40,065
I can't believe you saved me.
Thank you.
802
01:03:41,525 --> 01:03:44,861
Drink some milk first.
I'll be right back.
803
01:03:52,995 --> 01:03:55,455
Hey, look at you!
804
01:03:55,789 --> 01:03:58,124
You're covered in milk!
805
01:04:01,503 --> 01:04:06,003
What a good puppy...
Let me clean you up.
806
01:04:17,353 --> 01:04:18,312
Come--
807
01:04:19,188 --> 01:04:20,856
Let me clean you up.
808
01:04:24,443 --> 01:04:25,652
What a silly puppy...
809
01:04:37,414 --> 01:04:38,248
Help!
810
01:04:38,582 --> 01:04:40,500
Miss, I didn't mean to scare you!
811
01:04:41,502 --> 01:04:42,419
Miss!
812
01:04:44,213 --> 01:04:48,258
-Miss, everything I told you today is true.
-Leave! I don't want to hear it!
813
01:04:48,592 --> 01:04:50,594
I escaped from the hospital
to find my two students.
814
01:04:50,928 --> 01:04:53,055
I don't want them to be
caught by the Demon King.
815
01:04:53,389 --> 01:04:54,598
Please believe me.
816
01:04:54,932 --> 01:04:56,975
Leave, leave!
817
01:04:57,434 --> 01:04:58,893
Alright, I'll leave.
818
01:05:05,275 --> 01:05:06,484
I'm leaving!
819
01:05:10,114 --> 01:05:11,740
I'm returning your jade amulet.
820
01:05:13,409 --> 01:05:15,077
I left it on the table.
821
01:05:38,684 --> 01:05:41,103
In your past life, your name was Sisi.
822
01:05:41,437 --> 01:05:43,439
Hailing from Sika County.
823
01:05:43,772 --> 01:05:47,066
You were forced to marry the Demon King.
824
01:05:47,401 --> 01:05:50,362
The Demon King killed both your parents.
825
01:05:50,696 --> 01:05:55,196
In exchange for the safety of
the entire county, you agreed to marry him.
826
01:05:56,118 --> 01:05:58,453
Your attempt to murder him failed.
827
01:05:58,787 --> 01:06:02,999
He stole your soul, and ultimately,
you became his demonic concubine.
828
01:06:20,809 --> 01:06:22,435
You've been here all night?
829
01:06:22,936 --> 01:06:26,314
I had planned on leaving,
but then it rained all night.
830
01:06:27,483 --> 01:06:28,984
Your voice is cracked.
831
01:06:30,110 --> 01:06:31,152
Yes, well...
832
01:06:31,487 --> 01:06:32,696
I barked all night.
833
01:06:34,990 --> 01:06:36,783
Why didn't you come up
to get out of the rain?
834
01:06:37,367 --> 01:06:38,284
That's improper,
835
01:06:39,536 --> 01:06:43,164
Men and women
should keep a distance.
836
01:06:45,167 --> 01:06:47,043
I'm sorry about last night.
837
01:06:47,836 --> 01:06:48,920
It's fine.
838
01:06:52,007 --> 01:06:53,925
Why are there so many paper
cranes on the ground?
839
01:06:54,259 --> 01:06:57,804
It's my method of
communicating with my students.
840
01:06:59,431 --> 01:07:02,767
But my powers are
useless in the rain.
841
01:07:03,435 --> 01:07:07,147
Oh, yes. Their last message said they
were at the local lord's residence.
842
01:07:07,481 --> 01:07:09,441
Do you know where
the local lord lives?
843
01:07:10,275 --> 01:07:11,609
The lord's residence?
844
01:07:12,569 --> 01:07:16,155
Let me ask around,
I'll help you look.
845
01:07:16,490 --> 01:07:18,950
Oh yes, they're looking for you.
846
01:07:19,284 --> 01:07:23,496
You better stay at mine today.
Do you know how to use my keys?
847
01:07:23,830 --> 01:07:26,123
-Yes, I saw you use it.
-It's this one.
848
01:07:27,626 --> 01:07:29,085
I have to get to the hospital.
849
01:07:34,633 --> 01:07:36,843
Hey! Why are you still
standing around?
850
01:07:37,177 --> 01:07:39,929
I promise to help you look
for your students tonight, okay?
851
01:07:42,891 --> 01:07:43,933
Okay!
852
01:07:52,276 --> 01:07:56,113
Your transfiguration skills suck! You've
been at it all day, and nothing flies.
853
01:07:56,446 --> 01:08:00,825
Hey, it's still early! I'm still your
sihing, show some respect!
854
01:08:01,159 --> 01:08:03,452
Sihing?
What a load of crap!
855
01:08:04,538 --> 01:08:08,333
If it weren't for the rain every single
one of them would fly!
856
01:08:10,752 --> 01:08:13,671
A bad workman blames his tools!
857
01:08:14,006 --> 01:08:15,632
That phrase was made for you!
858
01:08:15,966 --> 01:08:19,803
Don't you know our powers don't
work in the rain!?
859
01:08:20,137 --> 01:08:21,012
Get it?
860
01:08:21,346 --> 01:08:23,598
-Sihing, are you done?
-Yes.
861
01:08:23,932 --> 01:08:28,269
Good, because I'm hungrier
than a dead dog. I beg you, save me!
862
01:08:28,604 --> 01:08:29,730
"Sihing"
863
01:08:32,482 --> 01:08:34,442
Namo Amitabha?
864
01:08:35,527 --> 01:08:36,945
I've got a plan!
865
01:08:49,249 --> 01:08:51,251
At home, you rely on your brothers.
866
01:08:51,710 --> 01:08:54,462
Out in the world,
you rely on your friends!
867
01:08:56,089 --> 01:08:59,342
Today, we have
journeyed into your fair town
868
01:08:59,676 --> 01:09:02,387
seeking nothing but two small meals.
869
01:09:02,721 --> 01:09:05,098
We're just warming up!
870
01:09:05,432 --> 01:09:07,308
We've saved the best for last.
871
01:09:09,019 --> 01:09:10,937
Why is he lying down?
872
01:09:14,816 --> 01:09:16,526
Can he even lift that slab?
873
01:09:17,819 --> 01:09:19,028
Get off.
874
01:09:22,908 --> 01:09:24,826
This strongman is more like it!
875
01:09:26,995 --> 01:09:28,037
He's all red!
876
01:09:28,955 --> 01:09:30,581
Can he really handle it?
877
01:09:30,916 --> 01:09:32,250
Don't kill anyone!
878
01:09:35,253 --> 01:09:37,255
He can't even lift the hammer!
879
01:09:48,809 --> 01:09:50,060
Get shit!
880
01:09:52,020 --> 01:09:53,062
Lie down!
881
01:09:57,442 --> 01:09:59,318
Be careful, Sidai!
882
01:10:00,028 --> 01:10:01,529
No charge if I don't
break it in one go!
883
01:10:01,863 --> 01:10:02,822
Let's see this!
884
01:10:03,615 --> 01:10:04,824
Sidai!
885
01:10:07,160 --> 01:10:08,286
How's that!?
886
01:10:08,620 --> 01:10:11,039
Thank you, thank you. Awesome!
887
01:10:11,373 --> 01:10:12,707
We won't be hungry again!
888
01:10:13,041 --> 01:10:14,083
Thank you, thank you.
889
01:10:14,418 --> 01:10:16,128
Cops, cops!
890
01:10:16,461 --> 01:10:20,214
Stop right there!
891
01:10:29,266 --> 01:10:30,267
One more...
892
01:10:31,101 --> 01:10:32,769
Hey! What are you doing?
Putting on a big show?
893
01:10:33,103 --> 01:10:34,187
Get up!
894
01:10:35,814 --> 01:10:37,899
Just busking for our next meal...
895
01:10:38,233 --> 01:10:40,276
Busking?
Arrest him!
896
01:10:42,404 --> 01:10:43,321
Let's go!
897
01:10:44,364 --> 01:10:44,947
Get up!
898
01:10:45,282 --> 01:10:47,450
Let go of me!
899
01:10:50,954 --> 01:10:52,872
Over, over!
Backup, backup!
900
01:10:53,206 --> 01:10:54,749
Backup?
901
01:11:00,380 --> 01:11:01,547
Who are you people?
902
01:11:04,259 --> 01:11:05,093
Are you alright?
903
01:11:05,427 --> 01:11:06,219
Let's go.
904
01:11:06,553 --> 01:11:09,055
Paper money is useless,
only silver coins count!
905
01:11:11,475 --> 01:11:14,519
Money!
906
01:11:14,853 --> 01:11:15,728
Move!
907
01:11:22,694 --> 01:11:23,945
Sifu...
908
01:11:24,279 --> 01:11:27,740
Stop... your whining
Is driving me crazy.
909
01:11:28,074 --> 01:11:31,202
-Sifu...
-I'm taking you to sifu now.
910
01:11:31,536 --> 01:11:32,662
Are you crazy?
911
01:11:33,580 --> 01:11:35,957
Excuse me, where is the Green
Waters Insane Asylum?
912
01:11:36,291 --> 01:11:37,917
You're going the right way, you
certainly belong there!
913
01:11:38,251 --> 01:11:38,960
Oh, uh, thanks.
914
01:12:28,260 --> 01:12:31,388
Gigi, I am now officially
proposing to you.
915
01:12:31,930 --> 01:12:33,181
Gigi, Gigi!
916
01:12:48,989 --> 01:12:50,031
For you!
917
01:12:51,533 --> 01:12:52,158
Ben--
918
01:12:52,492 --> 01:12:54,035
Please let me go, alright?
919
01:12:54,369 --> 01:12:55,244
Let you go?
920
01:12:56,746 --> 01:12:57,830
No!
921
01:13:08,925 --> 01:13:10,801
No need to run,
you won't get away!
922
01:13:11,344 --> 01:13:13,220
I'll find you even at
the ends of the earth!
923
01:13:29,321 --> 01:13:30,613
You're back.
924
01:13:31,239 --> 01:13:32,823
Why are you dressed like that?
925
01:13:33,909 --> 01:13:35,660
My clothes were wet.
926
01:13:37,746 --> 01:13:38,955
You turned on the television?
927
01:13:39,289 --> 01:13:42,333
Yes. I had seen you turn on
the illusion box, so I knew how.
928
01:13:46,171 --> 01:13:48,047
And you had the milk?
929
01:13:48,381 --> 01:13:51,300
Yes, I had some last night,
and it was pretty good.
930
01:13:51,801 --> 01:13:55,971
You're a smart, ancient man. You picked
everything up so quickly.
931
01:13:57,974 --> 01:13:58,891
Oh yes,
932
01:13:59,225 --> 01:14:02,269
On my way home, I think I saw
your two students on the highway.
933
01:14:02,604 --> 01:14:04,689
Really? How did you recognise them?
934
01:14:05,023 --> 01:14:07,525
By their clothing and behavior...
just as you said.
935
01:14:07,859 --> 01:14:08,734
You really saw them?
936
01:14:09,069 --> 01:14:10,779
-Come, let's go find them.
-No.
937
01:14:11,237 --> 01:14:12,529
I can't let them see me like this.
938
01:14:24,709 --> 01:14:25,876
I don't see them.
939
01:14:26,962 --> 01:14:29,339
I saw them around here.
940
01:14:29,673 --> 01:14:31,007
Let's go look over there.
941
01:14:38,014 --> 01:14:39,432
They're over there!
942
01:14:39,933 --> 01:14:42,310
It's very hard to
get there.
943
01:14:44,479 --> 01:14:45,730
Hey, what are you doing?
944
01:14:46,398 --> 01:14:47,107
Hey!
945
01:14:54,990 --> 01:14:57,200
You think you can do anything
just because it's for the movies?
946
01:15:03,039 --> 01:15:04,373
Little Turtle! Fung!
947
01:15:19,139 --> 01:15:20,098
Little Turtle! Fung!
948
01:15:20,598 --> 01:15:21,432
Fung!
949
01:15:24,436 --> 01:15:25,395
Sifu?
950
01:15:26,062 --> 01:15:28,022
-Sifu!
-Little Turtle!
951
01:15:28,356 --> 01:15:29,315
It's really sifu!
952
01:15:29,941 --> 01:15:30,900
Sifu!
953
01:15:31,276 --> 01:15:32,193
Sifu!
954
01:15:34,029 --> 01:15:35,030
Sifu!
955
01:15:35,363 --> 01:15:36,364
Sifu!
956
01:15:36,698 --> 01:15:39,867
Sifu, where have you been?
I thought we'd never see you again!
957
01:15:40,201 --> 01:15:41,285
Are you alright?
958
01:15:41,619 --> 01:15:42,870
We're fine, we're fine.
959
01:15:43,663 --> 01:15:44,747
Of course we're fine, sifu!
960
01:15:45,081 --> 01:15:48,709
We've been tired and hungry, it's
nice to be carried.
961
01:15:49,419 --> 01:15:51,629
-You lied to me!
-Watch yourself! Sifu is here!
962
01:15:51,963 --> 01:15:53,881
My arms are numb from carrying you!
963
01:15:54,215 --> 01:15:55,925
How could you!
964
01:15:56,259 --> 01:15:59,178
You're wasting your energy
fighting each other?
965
01:15:59,512 --> 01:16:01,222
The two of you are useless.
I'm leaving.
966
01:16:01,681 --> 01:16:02,932
Sifu, don't leave!
967
01:16:03,266 --> 01:16:04,100
Sifu!
968
01:16:05,226 --> 01:16:06,393
Sifu, don't leave!
969
01:16:06,728 --> 01:16:07,562
Wait for me!
970
01:16:07,896 --> 01:16:08,938
You stupid carriage!
971
01:16:09,731 --> 01:16:11,399
Sifu, sifu! Don't go!
972
01:16:11,733 --> 01:16:12,734
Sifu, sifu!
973
01:16:13,068 --> 01:16:13,735
Don't go!
974
01:16:14,069 --> 01:16:16,738
If you leave, we'll never find you! Sifu,
I promise to behave.
975
01:16:19,783 --> 01:16:22,160
Sifu, I'll be good, forgive me.
976
01:16:22,494 --> 01:16:23,286
Don't cry.
977
01:16:28,625 --> 01:16:29,500
Fung!
978
01:16:29,834 --> 01:16:31,252
Where do you
think you're going?
979
01:16:33,880 --> 01:16:36,340
I'm happy you two are reunited.
980
01:16:36,674 --> 01:16:39,677
But how long can ghosts and humans stay
together? I should take my leave.
981
01:16:40,011 --> 01:16:41,220
Sifu, I did as you said,
982
01:16:41,554 --> 01:16:43,556
I didn't tell him anything!
983
01:16:44,140 --> 01:16:45,349
God, you're so stupid.
984
01:16:45,683 --> 01:16:47,017
Gods can ride the clouds,
985
01:16:47,352 --> 01:16:48,561
so why are you
walking like a lost dog?
986
01:16:48,895 --> 01:16:51,355
Also, you ate my courier pigeon!
987
01:16:51,689 --> 01:16:52,648
So I'm not dead?
988
01:16:52,982 --> 01:16:53,857
I'm human?
989
01:16:55,151 --> 01:16:56,443
I'm really human!
990
01:17:04,953 --> 01:17:06,037
Let go!
991
01:17:08,957 --> 01:17:09,916
Let go of me!
992
01:17:10,250 --> 01:17:11,292
Let go of me!
993
01:17:12,127 --> 01:17:13,795
Relax, relax!
994
01:17:14,796 --> 01:17:15,588
Hey!
995
01:17:19,425 --> 01:17:20,717
The Demon's concubine!
996
01:17:21,052 --> 01:17:22,261
Demon's concubine? That's Sisi!
997
01:17:22,595 --> 01:17:23,429
-She's a demon!
-It's Si--
998
01:17:23,763 --> 01:17:25,055
She's neither.
She's Miss Gigi.
999
01:17:25,390 --> 01:17:26,474
She's in danger, let's go.
1000
01:17:26,808 --> 01:17:28,601
Sifu, go where though?
1001
01:17:35,024 --> 01:17:35,733
Sifu--
1002
01:17:36,401 --> 01:17:36,943
What's this?
1003
01:17:37,277 --> 01:17:39,070
A Lighter. Stole it when I
was roasting the pigeon.
1004
01:17:39,404 --> 01:17:40,446
It's super useful.
1005
01:17:44,325 --> 01:17:45,701
See?
1006
01:17:48,830 --> 01:17:50,832
-Hey, it's the lord's house!
-The lord's house?
1007
01:17:51,166 --> 01:17:52,208
-Yes.
-Then let's go!
1008
01:17:52,542 --> 01:17:54,460
-Sifu, you know how to get there?
-We'll ask for directions.
1009
01:17:54,794 --> 01:17:57,922
Sifu, you're outdated.
We can ask for a ride. Hail a cab!
1010
01:18:09,350 --> 01:18:11,226
Don't look at me like that.
1011
01:18:12,270 --> 01:18:14,647
I will melt in your loving gaze.
1012
01:18:22,447 --> 01:18:23,614
Don't move...
1013
01:18:27,035 --> 01:18:28,995
You are my princess.
1014
01:18:29,495 --> 01:18:31,288
Princess Chang-ping...
1015
01:18:31,873 --> 01:18:33,291
Let me go!
1016
01:18:33,708 --> 01:18:34,875
Please, let me go!
1017
01:18:35,210 --> 01:18:36,169
Let me go!
1018
01:18:36,502 --> 01:18:37,544
Let me tell you,
1019
01:18:38,630 --> 01:18:40,506
Till death do us part!
1020
01:18:47,889 --> 01:18:49,056
Don't be scared.
1021
01:18:49,599 --> 01:18:51,434
This kiss absolves you.
1022
01:18:53,853 --> 01:18:54,770
Walk!
1023
01:18:56,022 --> 01:18:58,190
Let go, let go!
1024
01:18:59,192 --> 01:19:00,401
Where do you think you're going?
1025
01:19:01,319 --> 01:19:02,778
Come with me,
come with me!
1026
01:19:15,917 --> 01:19:18,127
Play, play!
1027
01:19:25,843 --> 01:19:26,927
Sing.
1028
01:19:27,845 --> 01:19:29,221
Sing!
1029
01:19:55,373 --> 01:19:56,248
Run?
1030
01:19:56,582 --> 01:19:57,457
Where can you run?
1031
01:20:00,545 --> 01:20:02,755
Does it hurt?
1032
01:20:04,424 --> 01:20:07,051
Don't cry, good girl, the
wedding is about to start.
1033
01:20:07,385 --> 01:20:09,136
I told you not to run,
I already told you!
1034
01:20:09,470 --> 01:20:11,972
Where do you think you're going?
Where would you go?
1035
01:20:13,099 --> 01:20:16,310
Keep playing!
With feeling!
1036
01:20:16,644 --> 01:20:18,354
Good girl, don't cry.
1037
01:20:19,647 --> 01:20:22,066
Keep singing.
1038
01:20:23,484 --> 01:20:25,486
Tell them you agree,
1039
01:20:25,820 --> 01:20:27,863
tell them you want to marry me.
1040
01:20:28,197 --> 01:20:29,156
Say it!
1041
01:20:30,199 --> 01:20:30,949
III doll
1042
01:20:31,284 --> 01:20:31,909
Say it!
1043
01:20:32,243 --> 01:20:33,661
-No...
-Say it!
1044
01:20:33,995 --> 01:20:35,663
Say, "I do!"
1045
01:20:35,997 --> 01:20:38,416
Say it! Say it!
1046
01:20:38,750 --> 01:20:39,667
"I DO!"
1047
01:20:43,129 --> 01:20:45,631
Say it! Say you
agree to marry me!
1048
01:20:45,965 --> 01:20:48,258
Say it! Say, "I do!!"
1049
01:20:48,593 --> 01:20:49,385
Say it!
1050
01:20:49,719 --> 01:20:51,887
Say, "I do!"
1051
01:20:54,432 --> 01:20:55,391
Put this on!
1052
01:20:57,018 --> 01:20:58,060
Put it on!
1053
01:21:02,315 --> 01:21:04,358
Gigi, Gigi!
1054
01:21:34,097 --> 01:21:38,597
X Delta Dawn, what's that
flower you have on X
1055
01:21:39,727 --> 01:21:44,227
X Could it be a faded
rose from days gone by? X
1056
01:21:45,358 --> 01:21:49,779
X And did I hear you say he
was a-meeting you here today X
1057
01:21:50,154 --> 01:21:54,654
X To take you to his
mansion in the sky? X
1058
01:21:58,830 --> 01:22:00,248
Ben!
1059
01:22:08,548 --> 01:22:09,465
Don't...
1060
01:22:22,895 --> 01:22:24,730
I will sacrifice
everything for love.
1061
01:22:26,482 --> 01:22:28,609
Because I know what Love is.
1062
01:22:43,458 --> 01:22:47,958
X I'm singing in the rain X
1063
01:22:49,213 --> 01:22:51,882
I'm fall in love with you!
1064
01:22:53,384 --> 01:22:55,386
Ben, no!
1065
01:23:52,902 --> 01:23:54,445
Stop, stop!
1066
01:23:54,779 --> 01:23:56,113
You won't get away!
1067
01:23:58,866 --> 01:24:00,576
You won't get away!
1068
01:24:02,245 --> 01:24:03,412
I'll catch you!
1069
01:24:05,540 --> 01:24:06,165
Miss Gigi!
1070
01:24:06,499 --> 01:24:07,875
Ben killed himself!
1071
01:24:08,543 --> 01:24:09,585
The beast is over there!
1072
01:24:09,961 --> 01:24:12,004
And his corpse became this demon!
1073
01:24:12,338 --> 01:24:13,255
-Fung, Little Turtle!
-Yes!
1074
01:24:13,589 --> 01:24:15,048
-Go to true north first.
-Got it, sifu.
1075
01:24:15,383 --> 01:24:17,593
I'll lure him to where the
Big Dipper marks the spot!
1076
01:24:18,344 --> 01:24:19,178
Beast!
1077
01:24:19,512 --> 01:24:20,846
This time, we'll kill you.
1078
01:24:21,347 --> 01:24:23,223
-Beast your ass, let's go.
-Be careful!
1079
01:24:26,519 --> 01:24:28,103
It's sure hard making movies, right?
1080
01:24:28,437 --> 01:24:29,646
I used to be in movies too!
1081
01:24:30,523 --> 01:24:31,398
Have you got it yet?
1082
01:24:31,732 --> 01:24:33,191
-I'm looking!
-Look faster!
1083
01:24:33,526 --> 01:24:34,151
You don't believe me?
1084
01:24:34,485 --> 01:24:36,862
I'm Wong Four! I used to
be an action star at Shaw!
1085
01:24:37,196 --> 01:24:38,238
Left, go left!
1086
01:24:38,573 --> 01:24:39,282
Left right ahead.
1087
01:24:39,615 --> 01:24:40,699
You can't turn left there.
1088
01:24:41,033 --> 01:24:43,035
I told you to turn left
or you're fucked!
1089
01:24:43,369 --> 01:24:44,244
Fuck it, then.
1090
01:24:46,622 --> 01:24:48,999
Just straight ahead,
stop the carriage!
1091
01:24:50,418 --> 01:24:51,877
Get off the carriage, come on!
1092
01:24:56,340 --> 01:24:58,342
This is where the Big Dipper marks.
1093
01:24:58,676 --> 01:25:00,135
It's a car lot.
1094
01:25:00,469 --> 01:25:01,052
Hey!
1095
01:25:01,387 --> 01:25:02,930
I don't care if it's the
morgue or the artillery, pay up!
1096
01:25:03,264 --> 01:25:05,683
Are you kidding me?
I'm the governor of two provinces!
1097
01:25:06,017 --> 01:25:07,393
Even the Governor has to pay!
1098
01:25:08,311 --> 01:25:11,689
You're so mean.
No way around it then.
1099
01:25:12,023 --> 01:25:13,733
It's hard earned money!
1100
01:25:14,066 --> 01:25:15,776
-Is that enough?
-I'll take it!
1101
01:25:16,569 --> 01:25:18,320
-This way...
-Have you found it yet?
1102
01:25:18,904 --> 01:25:20,196
No, this way, this way.
1103
01:25:21,365 --> 01:25:22,866
No, this way, this way.
1104
01:25:23,200 --> 01:25:23,950
Hey, shortcake!
1105
01:25:24,285 --> 01:25:26,370
You're taking us in circles,
let's just walk straight.
1106
01:25:26,704 --> 01:25:28,455
What do you know?
If you knew, you'd navigate!
1107
01:25:28,789 --> 01:25:30,207
-Follow me!
-What a nuisance!
1108
01:25:30,541 --> 01:25:32,042
-Come.
-This way, this way.
1109
01:25:33,169 --> 01:25:34,753
No, that way, that way.
1110
01:25:36,339 --> 01:25:37,214
Not quite...
1111
01:25:37,590 --> 01:25:38,507
This way...
1112
01:25:38,841 --> 01:25:39,591
Is this fun for you?
1113
01:25:39,925 --> 01:25:40,759
Shut up!
1114
01:25:41,427 --> 01:25:43,387
This is the safest spot,
stay here.
1115
01:25:43,721 --> 01:25:45,681
Hey, find somewhere to hide her.
1116
01:25:49,769 --> 01:25:51,437
-This is for you.
-Hide here and don't move.
1117
01:25:51,771 --> 01:25:52,438
Stay hidden, okay?
1118
01:25:52,772 --> 01:25:54,273
-Get down.
-Let's go.
1119
01:25:56,776 --> 01:25:59,820
Sihing, Sifu is taking so long...
What if he's in trouble?
1120
01:26:00,154 --> 01:26:02,447
You're crazy, Sifu is so powerful,
what could happen to him?
1121
01:26:02,782 --> 01:26:06,035
Even though Sifu is so powerful,
we still had to pay for that cab.
1122
01:26:06,369 --> 01:26:08,913
That makes me think, what if
the demon gets here before Sifu?
1123
01:26:09,246 --> 01:26:11,122
We're unprepared.
We'd be at a disadvantage!
1124
01:26:11,457 --> 01:26:13,959
Let's find something
to protect ourselves.
1125
01:26:15,252 --> 01:26:15,919
Sifu!
1126
01:26:16,253 --> 01:26:17,504
Sifu, we were so worried!
1127
01:26:17,838 --> 01:26:19,297
We have to get to work.
1128
01:26:24,387 --> 01:26:26,222
-Prepare for the Moonlight Mirror ritual!
-Yes!
1129
01:26:31,268 --> 01:26:33,061
Here comes the demon!
1130
01:26:38,109 --> 01:26:39,610
Bring out the moonlight mirrors!
1131
01:26:47,243 --> 01:26:48,285
Be careful!
1132
01:27:39,044 --> 01:27:40,003
Sihing!
1133
01:27:42,214 --> 01:27:43,632
Sihing...
1134
01:27:44,467 --> 01:27:46,844
-Are you alright?
-It's a miracle I'm fine, I'm not you!
1135
01:27:47,178 --> 01:27:49,263
You're big, strong, and have
the Emperor's protection!
1136
01:28:09,950 --> 01:28:11,284
-To your positions!
-Yes!
1137
01:28:12,369 --> 01:28:13,286
Where are the Moonlight Mirrors?
1138
01:28:13,621 --> 01:28:14,455
Shit...
1139
01:28:15,456 --> 01:28:16,415
Over there!
1140
01:28:47,988 --> 01:28:49,864
We're doomed!
Sifu can't get wet!
1141
01:28:50,199 --> 01:28:51,200
Now what?
1142
01:29:42,835 --> 01:29:44,795
If we keep going,
Sifu will transform!
1143
01:29:45,212 --> 01:29:46,129
Think of something!
1144
01:29:46,505 --> 01:29:49,257
Go stall for time, the Emperor's protection
should keep you safe.
1145
01:29:49,592 --> 01:29:51,677
-Are you sure?
-Worth a try!
1146
01:29:53,470 --> 01:29:55,722
-Sifu...
-Alright!
1147
01:30:01,061 --> 01:30:01,853
Sifu!
1148
01:30:04,231 --> 01:30:05,148
Get out of here!
1149
01:30:05,482 --> 01:30:06,941
-Leave!
-No!
1150
01:30:07,443 --> 01:30:09,027
-Leave!
-No!
1151
01:30:09,820 --> 01:30:11,363
If you die, we'll die together!
1152
01:30:11,697 --> 01:30:13,031
-Leave!
-No!
1153
01:30:14,241 --> 01:30:14,950
Leave!
1154
01:30:32,384 --> 01:30:33,343
Sidai!
1155
01:30:33,677 --> 01:30:34,886
Run, run!
1156
01:30:35,220 --> 01:30:36,095
Sidai!
1157
01:30:37,222 --> 01:30:38,598
Sidai!
1158
01:30:40,684 --> 01:30:41,643
Run!
1159
01:30:44,939 --> 01:30:46,148
To the death!
1160
01:30:46,482 --> 01:30:47,316
Little Turtle!
1161
01:31:41,829 --> 01:31:44,414
Beloved...
1162
01:31:47,751 --> 01:31:49,335
I die by your sword...
1163
01:32:23,328 --> 01:32:24,746
Taoist priest!
1164
01:33:03,452 --> 01:33:04,494
Miss--
1165
01:33:09,833 --> 01:33:10,917
Are you alright?
1166
01:33:12,002 --> 01:33:12,752
Taoist priest?
1167
01:33:13,087 --> 01:33:16,256
Sir, we found a Japanese sword
at the crime scene.
1168
01:33:16,590 --> 01:33:17,215
Is anyone injured?
1169
01:33:17,549 --> 01:33:20,385
Nope, but the scene is
messier than Big Goof's home.
1170
01:33:21,345 --> 01:33:23,138
-Keep looking,
-Yes, sir!
1171
01:33:24,473 --> 01:33:27,767
Ma Sheung-fung lock down the crime scene.
Please take this lady to the hospital.
1172
01:33:28,102 --> 01:33:29,561
Miss, please come with me.
80856
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