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1
00:00:05,200 --> 00:00:06,560
-[tapping]
-[intro music]
2
00:00:06,640 --> 00:00:11,240
Anyone watching, thinking we know fuck all
about knowing fuck all about owt,
3
00:00:11,320 --> 00:00:13,440
needs to watch their back.
[cries out]
4
00:00:13,520 --> 00:00:16,079
So, you've had your Labour,
reclassifying skunk,
5
00:00:16,160 --> 00:00:18,320
sending prices sky high,
6
00:00:18,400 --> 00:00:22,280
literally, literally taking the grass
from its own roots.
7
00:00:22,360 --> 00:00:25,040
And now you've got your con-dem-nation,
8
00:00:25,120 --> 00:00:28,440
Liberals noshing Tories
like altar boys picking dimps up.
9
00:00:28,520 --> 00:00:32,280
Have we had
a national fucking stroke or what?
10
00:00:32,360 --> 00:00:36,360
Is revolution a word or was it never?
11
00:00:36,440 --> 00:00:38,680
Anybody watching, needs to know
12
00:00:38,760 --> 00:00:41,960
we cope better than average
with irony in Chatsworth.
13
00:00:42,040 --> 00:00:45,440
Well, for fuck's sake,
we live in Manchester
14
00:00:45,520 --> 00:00:48,200
and they charge us for water!
15
00:00:48,280 --> 00:00:53,520
I wandered lonely as a clown,
necking mushrooms rarely found,
16
00:00:53,600 --> 00:00:56,720
this green and pleasant land
in ancient times...
17
00:00:56,800 --> 00:00:59,320
yak, yak, yak, yak, yak, yak!
18
00:00:59,400 --> 00:01:02,600
It's not theirs anymore.
19
00:01:02,680 --> 00:01:05,960
-This is our England now.
-[cheering]
20
00:01:06,040 --> 00:01:07,600
Party!
21
00:01:07,680 --> 00:01:11,080
[intro music]
22
00:01:11,160 --> 00:01:12,760
[intro music fades away]
23
00:01:18,280 --> 00:01:21,080
[Frank] Cogito ergo sum.
24
00:01:21,160 --> 00:01:24,200
Pardon my French, well Latin, actually.
25
00:01:25,160 --> 00:01:29,160
The English is "I think therefore I am,"
26
00:01:29,240 --> 00:01:33,760
a phrase captured by some snail-chewer
called Rene Descartes.
27
00:01:35,880 --> 00:01:41,120
Essentially, it means that because
you're capable of logical thought,
28
00:01:41,200 --> 00:01:43,200
you are aware of your existence.
29
00:01:45,600 --> 00:01:47,600
But by the same method,
30
00:01:47,680 --> 00:01:51,600
you haven't got the foggiest
what's going on in my head,
31
00:01:51,680 --> 00:01:55,720
so there's no real way
of knowing I definitely exist.
32
00:01:55,800 --> 00:01:58,600
I could be a figment
of your imagination,
33
00:01:58,680 --> 00:02:03,480
me and everything,
you know, everyone in your world.
34
00:02:20,040 --> 00:02:21,640
[buzzing]
35
00:02:28,720 --> 00:02:29,640
[drumming]
36
00:02:34,000 --> 00:02:35,000
[microwave beeps]
37
00:02:39,040 --> 00:02:40,920
["Starman" by David Bowie over stereo]
38
00:02:45,640 --> 00:02:46,720
[microwave stops]
39
00:02:46,800 --> 00:02:47,920
[window opens violently]
40
00:02:52,960 --> 00:02:54,240
[music stops]
41
00:02:55,680 --> 00:02:57,960
[eerie music]
42
00:03:22,880 --> 00:03:25,800
[note sequence]
43
00:03:28,520 --> 00:03:32,680
[note sequence]
44
00:03:38,840 --> 00:03:44,840
[note sequence]
45
00:03:50,640 --> 00:03:51,520
[bird chirping]
46
00:03:52,400 --> 00:03:58,920
[note sequence]
47
00:04:02,960 --> 00:04:04,160
[loud low noise]
48
00:04:17,760 --> 00:04:19,720
[loud low noise increases]
49
00:04:22,440 --> 00:04:23,960
Fuck off!
50
00:04:24,040 --> 00:04:25,240
[all talking indistinctly]
51
00:04:25,320 --> 00:04:26,840
What, a stag night?
52
00:04:26,920 --> 00:04:30,480
If I wanted an evening
of ritual humiliation, I'd stay at home.
53
00:04:30,560 --> 00:04:32,360
Are you sure you want
to go through with this wedding?
54
00:04:32,440 --> 00:04:35,080
You won't catch me getting married again.
55
00:04:35,160 --> 00:04:37,920
I'm not going to stay
and have my private life dissected,
56
00:04:38,000 --> 00:04:40,480
and judged by the likes of you.
57
00:04:40,560 --> 00:04:42,520
Same again, Jamie. My round, lads.
58
00:04:45,400 --> 00:04:47,640
Cos I don't know
59
00:04:47,720 --> 00:04:49,680
how I can even begin
60
00:04:49,760 --> 00:04:54,560
to explain what it is that me
and Libby have got precisely.
61
00:04:54,640 --> 00:04:55,640
[Carl] Er...
62
00:04:55,720 --> 00:04:56,760
Try.
63
00:05:01,120 --> 00:05:02,720
Well, starters, we're in love.
64
00:05:02,800 --> 00:05:04,880
[all laugh]
65
00:05:04,960 --> 00:05:07,520
[all laugh]
66
00:05:07,600 --> 00:05:10,000
Just because you've never
had the love of a good man!
67
00:05:10,080 --> 00:05:13,680
[Mimi] Well, the only things Frank loves
come with a Government health warning.
68
00:05:14,680 --> 00:05:15,680
We're soulmates!
69
00:05:15,760 --> 00:05:18,000
[all laugh]
70
00:05:18,080 --> 00:05:19,600
[all laugh]
71
00:05:19,680 --> 00:05:21,680
Her soul, my soul.
72
00:05:21,760 --> 00:05:22,600
Arseholes!
73
00:05:22,680 --> 00:05:25,520
-[Micky] Well said, sweet pea.
-[Frank] I don't need a ring on me finger
74
00:05:25,600 --> 00:05:27,720
or a blessing from fuck knows who,
but she does.
75
00:05:27,800 --> 00:05:29,200
She's happy, I'm happy.
76
00:05:29,280 --> 00:05:30,640
[all laugh]
77
00:05:30,720 --> 00:05:33,400
Okay, he's not perfect,
but who the bloody hell is?
78
00:05:33,480 --> 00:05:35,680
I'm not far off.
A few minor blemishes but--
79
00:05:35,760 --> 00:05:37,480
This is no time for jokes!
80
00:05:37,560 --> 00:05:38,480
Who's joking?
81
00:05:38,560 --> 00:05:42,080
Any wonder she's been on the shelf
as long as she has with that attitude?
82
00:05:42,160 --> 00:05:45,200
When I were her age, men were
falling over themselves to get to me.
83
00:05:45,280 --> 00:05:47,680
[Kelly] Falling over
their fuckin' guide dogs.
84
00:05:52,640 --> 00:05:54,160
We were just pulling your leg.
85
00:05:54,240 --> 00:05:55,960
[Mimi] That's what I was just saying.
86
00:05:56,040 --> 00:05:57,800
Frank's altered
since they've been together.
87
00:05:57,880 --> 00:06:00,040
Often hear him in the pub
talking about you.
88
00:06:00,120 --> 00:06:02,520
[Kelly] People saying
they've never seen him so happy.
89
00:06:04,320 --> 00:06:08,560
The cause of all the trouble
in all the world
90
00:06:08,640 --> 00:06:10,520
since the dawn of time,
91
00:06:10,600 --> 00:06:15,440
can be traced right back
via one singular route to...
92
00:06:16,440 --> 00:06:17,600
the moustache!
93
00:06:17,680 --> 00:06:21,400
Hitler, Stalin, Lenin, Mandelson...
94
00:06:21,480 --> 00:06:22,840
Down you go!
95
00:06:24,440 --> 00:06:25,920
[gasps in horror]
96
00:06:26,000 --> 00:06:27,720
Freddie Mercury!
97
00:06:31,400 --> 00:06:33,400
I'm not stupid.
98
00:06:33,480 --> 00:06:38,720
I'm aware of his shortcomings,
and I'm going into this with my eyes open.
99
00:06:40,960 --> 00:06:43,320
Well, if only you'd set your sights
a little higher.
100
00:06:46,680 --> 00:06:49,560
And the cupboard was bare.
Right, girls, pub.
101
00:06:49,640 --> 00:06:51,720
[Libby] I'll be over
as soon as Liam shows.
102
00:06:51,800 --> 00:06:54,480
Should've asked Mickey
to keep an eye on her. He's got Cilla.
103
00:06:54,560 --> 00:06:57,200
Just as easy to look
after two kids as it is one.
104
00:06:57,280 --> 00:06:58,600
How the fuck would you know?
105
00:06:59,760 --> 00:07:02,720
You're sticking with the name then?
Cilla. Are you a fan?
106
00:07:02,800 --> 00:07:06,880
-"Step Inside Love" was a great song.
-Is it a Liverpoodlian thing?
107
00:07:06,960 --> 00:07:08,920
[Patty] But I always preferred Lulu.
108
00:07:09,000 --> 00:07:10,760
That thing she did with her accent.
109
00:07:10,840 --> 00:07:14,880
Scottish one minute,
English the next. Such talent!
110
00:07:18,080 --> 00:07:20,520
It's got nothing to do
with being Scouse, Lillian,
111
00:07:20,600 --> 00:07:24,560
and everything to do with the birth
being one fuck of a Surprise Surprise.
112
00:07:24,640 --> 00:07:25,880
Cilla Maguire, then?
113
00:07:25,960 --> 00:07:29,280
-Stop fishing.
-Come on, Mimi, who's the daddy?
114
00:07:29,360 --> 00:07:32,440
You really do want
your face rearranging, don't you?
115
00:07:32,520 --> 00:07:33,360
Hmph.
116
00:07:34,800 --> 00:07:37,080
Who could blame her? Later, Libs.
117
00:07:47,520 --> 00:07:48,520
Hiya, Avril.
118
00:07:51,240 --> 00:07:52,800
Is everything all right?
119
00:07:52,880 --> 00:07:53,760
[door opens]
120
00:07:55,800 --> 00:07:57,400
Letitia!
121
00:07:57,480 --> 00:07:59,520
-Letitia!
-[music over headphones]
122
00:07:59,600 --> 00:08:01,160
Your father's here!
123
00:08:01,240 --> 00:08:02,240
He's at football.
124
00:08:02,320 --> 00:08:04,400
Goalie got a groin strain,
match was cancelled.
125
00:08:05,480 --> 00:08:06,840
Why didn't you get changed?
126
00:08:06,920 --> 00:08:09,120
If your father finds out I've sent you
to private school he'll kill me!
127
00:08:09,200 --> 00:08:11,040
I don't know how much longer
I can keep this up!
128
00:08:11,120 --> 00:08:14,200
-Once you're in Uni', it's all over.
-I might not even get into Uni'.
129
00:08:14,280 --> 00:08:15,960
You better bloody had.
130
00:08:16,040 --> 00:08:18,560
The amount I've spent
sending you to that place.
131
00:08:19,840 --> 00:08:21,080
I want the lot.
132
00:08:21,160 --> 00:08:24,880
GCSEs, A-Levels and a first class degree.
133
00:08:24,960 --> 00:08:25,800
[door opens]
134
00:08:28,040 --> 00:08:31,400
Liam's asked if she can give him a hand
with his homework again.
135
00:08:31,480 --> 00:08:33,159
Should bring him in here.
136
00:08:33,240 --> 00:08:35,679
He doesn't like anyone
knowing he's struggling.
137
00:08:41,760 --> 00:08:42,600
[Jackson] Uh...
138
00:08:42,679 --> 00:08:44,280
-[Jackson groans]
-[Avril moans]
139
00:08:44,360 --> 00:08:45,240
Put the lock on.
140
00:08:50,680 --> 00:08:51,520
Ah!
141
00:08:54,040 --> 00:08:55,600
[Avril] This... do ya?
142
00:08:55,680 --> 00:08:57,920
-[Jackson] Mm! Yes!
-[Avril] Ah!
143
00:09:01,720 --> 00:09:03,480
Ah! Ah-ha!
[chuckling]
144
00:09:03,560 --> 00:09:05,080
Too soon! Too soon!
145
00:09:07,320 --> 00:09:09,120
-You like it like that, eh?
-Yeah!
146
00:09:10,040 --> 00:09:12,720
-[Jackson] You want a bit of that?
-Yeah!
147
00:09:15,880 --> 00:09:16,760
[Avril] Agh!
148
00:09:19,000 --> 00:09:20,320
Yeah!
149
00:09:21,400 --> 00:09:23,560
[both moan]
150
00:09:23,640 --> 00:09:24,880
[Avril] Aghh!
151
00:09:35,720 --> 00:09:36,960
[Micky] Go to mummy.
152
00:09:37,040 --> 00:09:39,120
Look after the baby
a bit longer will you, son?
153
00:09:41,320 --> 00:09:42,480
[Cilla babbling]
154
00:09:47,000 --> 00:09:47,840
Hiya, Stevie.
155
00:09:47,920 --> 00:09:50,400
I don't know
if you remember me, but... [tuts]
156
00:09:50,480 --> 00:09:51,320
Mimi?
157
00:09:51,400 --> 00:09:55,720
Phil, I know this sounds weird,
and believe me, all I'm after is answers.
158
00:09:55,800 --> 00:09:57,440
Would it be possible to talk inside?
159
00:09:57,520 --> 00:09:59,320
I don't think the wife'd be too impressed.
160
00:09:59,400 --> 00:10:03,040
What I need to know is
if you can remember when we...
161
00:10:04,040 --> 00:10:05,080
got together.
162
00:10:05,160 --> 00:10:07,120
-I need you to take a blood test.
-Shit!
163
00:10:07,200 --> 00:10:08,760
You've not got the AIDS, have you?
164
00:10:08,840 --> 00:10:10,960
-Definitely August?
-Look, I was pissed.
165
00:10:11,040 --> 00:10:14,040
-To see if you're me child's father.
-No chance of that, Mimi.
166
00:10:14,120 --> 00:10:16,200
I had the snip 20 years ago.
167
00:10:16,280 --> 00:10:18,560
It was a one night stand
and I'm cool with that.
168
00:10:18,640 --> 00:10:20,120
What was a one night stand?
169
00:10:20,200 --> 00:10:21,120
Shit!
170
00:10:21,200 --> 00:10:22,280
It's not what you think!
171
00:10:22,360 --> 00:10:24,680
What the fuck
would you know about what I think?
172
00:10:27,000 --> 00:10:29,400
She's out tonight.
[groans] Uhh!
173
00:10:29,480 --> 00:10:30,760
Any chance of a rematch?
174
00:10:30,840 --> 00:10:32,320
-I took advantage, honest--
-Oh!
175
00:10:32,400 --> 00:10:34,080
-[Mimi] Agh!
-[Chrissy grunts]
176
00:10:34,160 --> 00:10:36,080
[Mimi screams]
177
00:10:37,520 --> 00:10:38,800
You bitch!
178
00:10:38,880 --> 00:10:40,520
You've ruined everything!
179
00:10:40,600 --> 00:10:41,440
Mimi?
180
00:10:45,360 --> 00:10:47,000
Can I see your dad, please, Andy?
181
00:10:47,080 --> 00:10:48,040
Sure.
182
00:11:08,960 --> 00:11:11,320
I'm off the pub. Planning the wedding.
183
00:11:11,400 --> 00:11:13,560
I'm so excited, I can't tell you.
184
00:11:13,640 --> 00:11:14,920
We're having ice sculptures.
185
00:11:15,000 --> 00:11:17,120
Famous Mancunians in literature.
186
00:11:17,200 --> 00:11:18,160
[door knocks]
187
00:11:22,600 --> 00:11:24,240
I'm sorry to disturb you.
188
00:11:24,320 --> 00:11:27,720
Is it possible to speak
to Mr Gallagher, please?
189
00:11:27,800 --> 00:11:29,840
Vernon Francis Gallagher?
190
00:11:29,920 --> 00:11:31,720
I'm afraid he's not in at the moment.
191
00:11:31,800 --> 00:11:34,920
I'm his fiancée, can I help you?
192
00:11:39,240 --> 00:11:42,360
It's about his daughter,
Deborah Gallagher.
193
00:11:46,280 --> 00:11:48,640
[Jamie] So what's all this about?
194
00:11:48,720 --> 00:11:50,520
[Karen] You might be missing Connor.
195
00:11:51,520 --> 00:11:53,720
I know he's been missing you.
196
00:11:53,800 --> 00:11:55,240
Thought you might want to see him.
197
00:11:56,680 --> 00:11:58,000
So you and Joe?
198
00:11:58,960 --> 00:12:00,200
This is about me and you.
199
00:12:02,120 --> 00:12:04,200
Joe told me Connor was his.
200
00:12:04,280 --> 00:12:05,920
Showed me the DNA results.
201
00:12:06,000 --> 00:12:07,400
Well he called your bluff.
202
00:12:07,480 --> 00:12:10,120
And if you'd have opened the envelope
you'd have seen it was a gas bill.
203
00:12:12,120 --> 00:12:13,880
What's going on?
204
00:12:13,960 --> 00:12:15,800
I said I'd kill him and I meant it,
so why would he agree to this?
205
00:12:15,880 --> 00:12:18,880
I haven't got time for this.
Offer's on the table.
206
00:12:18,960 --> 00:12:21,640
Call me when you're thinking straight.
207
00:12:21,720 --> 00:12:25,120
Ha! You're dumping Connor.
He's found out Connor's mine.
208
00:12:25,200 --> 00:12:27,160
Fucking cuckoo in the nest
and he wants rid.
209
00:12:28,320 --> 00:12:30,520
Wants to play happy families,
have his own kids!
210
00:12:30,600 --> 00:12:32,800
Send you to sweet talk me
so you can offload?
211
00:12:32,880 --> 00:12:33,720
Karen!
212
00:12:40,920 --> 00:12:42,480
-[Jamie] I said--
-[Karen] Jamie!
213
00:12:42,560 --> 00:12:45,000
I'd kill you if I ever saw you again.
[slamming]
214
00:12:45,080 --> 00:12:46,120
[Karen] It's not him!
215
00:12:46,200 --> 00:12:47,680
[Jamie grunts]
216
00:12:47,760 --> 00:12:49,200
[Karen] It's not him!
217
00:12:56,480 --> 00:13:00,000
Oh, it's not another fucking
Dr Who convention, is it, Lillian?
218
00:13:00,080 --> 00:13:01,400
No, why?
219
00:13:01,480 --> 00:13:03,000
It's just...
220
00:13:03,080 --> 00:13:04,680
after tickets.
221
00:13:08,000 --> 00:13:10,480
Oh! Can't get a minute's peace,
what is it?
222
00:13:11,400 --> 00:13:12,680
I'm sorry.
223
00:13:12,760 --> 00:13:14,440
I'm so, so sorry.
224
00:13:14,520 --> 00:13:19,680
All I'm after is a quiet fucking pint
with the lads, and in she walks.
225
00:13:21,440 --> 00:13:22,800
It's Debbie.
226
00:13:25,000 --> 00:13:27,640
She's been killed in Afghanistan.
227
00:13:27,720 --> 00:13:29,520
[ominous music]
228
00:13:50,360 --> 00:13:52,120
[door opens]
229
00:13:53,720 --> 00:13:55,120
Fucking rag-heads.
230
00:13:56,200 --> 00:13:58,640
If you need anything, Frank.
231
00:13:59,640 --> 00:14:02,760
You could chuck us 40 fags
until the giro hits my account.
232
00:14:06,800 --> 00:14:08,960
Just need to anaesthetise.
233
00:14:09,040 --> 00:14:09,920
Cheers.
234
00:14:11,440 --> 00:14:13,160
-No credit!
-Leave it!
235
00:14:13,240 --> 00:14:15,640
You're haemorrhaging profit left,
right and centre, and this is why.
236
00:14:15,720 --> 00:14:16,680
He's just lost his daughter.
237
00:14:16,760 --> 00:14:19,400
And our family will lose this shop
if you carry on like this.
238
00:14:19,480 --> 00:14:21,320
-[Sita] Name?
-Frank Gallagher.
239
00:14:21,400 --> 00:14:25,160
[Sita] Frank "£ 32.85 outstanding
on your slate" Gallagher.
240
00:14:25,240 --> 00:14:26,720
Frank "my daughter died
241
00:14:26,800 --> 00:14:29,560
defending Queen and country
for the likes of you" Gallagher
242
00:14:29,640 --> 00:14:31,640
got a better ring to it. But, yeah.
243
00:14:31,720 --> 00:14:33,120
[Chesney] You're bang out of order, Sita.
244
00:14:33,200 --> 00:14:35,520
[Carl] You know what, Ches?
Don't even worry about it, mate.
245
00:14:41,640 --> 00:14:43,320
I'll take over here.
246
00:14:43,400 --> 00:14:44,240
[Libby] I'm fine.
247
00:14:44,320 --> 00:14:46,560
I know for a fact
you haven't slept a wink.
248
00:14:46,640 --> 00:14:48,960
Looking after Liam, Carl, Frank.
249
00:14:50,360 --> 00:14:52,080
Let me look after you.
250
00:14:56,280 --> 00:14:58,480
-Beans on toast do you?
-We've nothing in.
251
00:14:58,560 --> 00:15:01,160
-[Carl] I'm not that hungry.
-[closes kitchen drawer]
252
00:15:01,240 --> 00:15:04,080
You've not had any breakfast,
you've got to eat something.
253
00:15:04,160 --> 00:15:06,240
[Libby] I'll go round the shop. Liam?
254
00:15:07,680 --> 00:15:10,320
[Carl cries]
255
00:15:23,880 --> 00:15:26,560
It's okay, your Mum's here.
256
00:15:26,640 --> 00:15:28,200
[steps on stairs]
257
00:15:28,280 --> 00:15:29,200
[Monica] Liam...
258
00:15:30,200 --> 00:15:31,280
Carl.
259
00:15:31,360 --> 00:15:33,280
[exhales] Monica?
260
00:15:33,360 --> 00:15:36,440
Oh, oh, oh!
261
00:15:38,640 --> 00:15:41,400
[Monica dramatically]
Frank, our little girl.
262
00:15:41,480 --> 00:15:45,160
Don't worry. I'm here now.
263
00:15:45,240 --> 00:15:47,840
I don't know what came over me.
264
00:15:47,920 --> 00:15:49,920
I'm not the fainting type.
265
00:15:50,000 --> 00:15:51,040
[Libby] It's the shock.
266
00:15:51,120 --> 00:15:52,840
You've suffered a terrible loss.
267
00:15:52,920 --> 00:15:55,280
And you're God knows
how many months up the spout.
268
00:15:55,360 --> 00:15:56,960
My children need me.
269
00:15:57,800 --> 00:15:59,560
You need me.
270
00:16:02,480 --> 00:16:04,920
Could you give us
a few moments in private?
271
00:16:08,840 --> 00:16:09,840
[Libby] Oh...
272
00:16:09,920 --> 00:16:11,960
Of course.
273
00:16:12,040 --> 00:16:13,480
Sorry.
274
00:16:19,080 --> 00:16:20,320
Have you heard from Carl?
275
00:16:21,160 --> 00:16:24,400
Texted him. Not heard back yet,
I think he's best left.
276
00:16:26,040 --> 00:16:29,120
-What are you doing here?
-Saving you from yourself.
277
00:16:30,240 --> 00:16:34,000
I'd appreciate it if you didn't serve him
with alcohol again.
278
00:16:34,080 --> 00:16:34,960
Bird?
279
00:16:35,040 --> 00:16:36,280
Cousin.
280
00:16:36,360 --> 00:16:39,120
Sita, I told grandad,
I don't need his help.
281
00:16:39,200 --> 00:16:41,040
So you reject his help,
but accept his money?
282
00:16:41,120 --> 00:16:42,240
Back off!
283
00:16:42,320 --> 00:16:45,920
As soon as you prove you can behave
like the good Muslim boy I know you to be,
284
00:16:46,000 --> 00:16:46,880
I will.
285
00:16:53,920 --> 00:16:54,880
Hum.
286
00:17:01,720 --> 00:17:04,920
I'll top and tail with Mum.
Frank can take the couch.
287
00:17:05,000 --> 00:17:08,920
-Can't have you cramped in your condition.
-Six weeks to go. I can't wait.
288
00:17:09,000 --> 00:17:12,240
-A little bundle of love.
-Oh, that big bundle of cash!
289
00:17:12,319 --> 00:17:15,440
I'm a surrogate for a gay couple in Oldham
who've got everything
290
00:17:15,520 --> 00:17:17,960
they could possibly want, bar kids.
291
00:17:18,040 --> 00:17:19,560
You're going to give it away?
292
00:17:19,640 --> 00:17:23,119
Oh no, I get 18K. For him. Ricky Martin.
293
00:17:23,200 --> 00:17:25,640
I haven't formed an emotional attachment.
294
00:17:26,720 --> 00:17:27,560
You got kids?
295
00:17:27,640 --> 00:17:30,000
-The timing was never right.
-You didn't find a man
296
00:17:30,080 --> 00:17:32,280
'til Mother Nature withdrew her favours.
297
00:17:32,360 --> 00:17:34,200
Aw! Career woman?
298
00:17:34,280 --> 00:17:36,520
-Librarian.
-Hardly worth it, was it?
299
00:17:38,280 --> 00:17:39,240
Where did you meet?
300
00:17:40,520 --> 00:17:43,400
It was in the poetry section,
reading Byron,
301
00:17:43,480 --> 00:17:44,320
Wordsworth,
302
00:17:44,400 --> 00:17:47,600
-"I wandered lonely as a cloud."
-In a cloud if I know Frank.
303
00:17:47,680 --> 00:17:50,440
-We had an immediate attraction.
-Oh yeah, we had one of them.
304
00:17:50,520 --> 00:17:53,400
I got knocked up in the gents,
in the Wigan Casino all-nighter.
305
00:17:53,480 --> 00:17:55,240
That's where we made little Fifi.
306
00:17:55,320 --> 00:17:56,160
Fiona.
307
00:17:57,480 --> 00:17:58,880
Oh!
308
00:17:58,960 --> 00:18:00,680
[Libby]
It's supposed to be in three weeks.
309
00:18:00,760 --> 00:18:02,520
I really don't see how we can go ahead.
310
00:18:02,600 --> 00:18:06,480
Oh, but it's exactly
what Debbie would have wanted.
311
00:18:06,560 --> 00:18:10,200
New beginnings. Oh, you must go ahead.
312
00:18:10,280 --> 00:18:13,600
-I don't think Frank...
-I know how to get around Frank.
313
00:18:13,680 --> 00:18:15,240
You leave him to me.
314
00:18:27,280 --> 00:18:28,320
Usual, Monica?
315
00:18:30,440 --> 00:18:32,080
What, in my state?
316
00:18:33,120 --> 00:18:33,960
Just a single.
317
00:18:37,920 --> 00:18:38,800
[Monica] Oh!
318
00:18:39,960 --> 00:18:41,920
Debbie would have loved that.
319
00:18:42,000 --> 00:18:45,320
Except for the flowers.
She weren't big on lilies.
320
00:18:45,400 --> 00:18:46,440
On the house.
321
00:18:46,520 --> 00:18:48,240
Sorry for your loss.
322
00:18:48,320 --> 00:18:49,280
Thanks, Jamie.
323
00:18:53,640 --> 00:18:54,480
[exhales]
324
00:18:59,320 --> 00:19:00,320
To Debbie.
325
00:19:02,640 --> 00:19:03,920
[mumbles]
326
00:19:13,000 --> 00:19:16,040
[sobbing] It's... our little girl.
327
00:19:16,920 --> 00:19:19,000
It's our Debbie.
328
00:19:19,080 --> 00:19:22,640
Please, Frank... [sobbing] don't!
329
00:19:23,720 --> 00:19:24,720
We had a whip-round.
330
00:19:24,800 --> 00:19:27,720
The wake's on us. Food, booze...
331
00:19:28,640 --> 00:19:31,520
Oh, man, that's such a comfort.
332
00:19:34,840 --> 00:19:37,200
Debbie wouldn't have wanted this.
333
00:19:37,280 --> 00:19:40,160
All these miserable faces.
334
00:19:42,680 --> 00:19:44,920
Let's celebrate her life, eh?
335
00:19:45,000 --> 00:19:46,200
[crying]
336
00:19:47,800 --> 00:19:49,200
Drinks for everyone.
337
00:19:49,280 --> 00:19:50,160
[all cheering]
338
00:19:50,240 --> 00:19:54,160
A toast. For Debbie.
339
00:19:54,240 --> 00:19:56,120
It's not like we can't afford it.
340
00:19:56,200 --> 00:19:58,880
I've got some cash coming my way.
341
00:20:00,440 --> 00:20:01,920
[utensil clinks]
342
00:20:05,480 --> 00:20:07,680
Cilla's out like a light.
[snores]
343
00:20:12,480 --> 00:20:13,320
Okay?
344
00:20:15,400 --> 00:20:16,440
Feel like shit.
345
00:20:17,400 --> 00:20:19,120
Exhausted with it all.
346
00:20:19,200 --> 00:20:20,480
Mam, don't be embarrassed.
347
00:20:20,560 --> 00:20:24,680
When me and your dad separated
I did anything and everything
348
00:20:24,760 --> 00:20:26,920
to get some sense of self-worth.
349
00:20:27,000 --> 00:20:29,560
To prove to myself that I was still...
350
00:20:29,640 --> 00:20:31,040
attractive,
351
00:20:31,120 --> 00:20:32,120
desirable.
352
00:20:36,920 --> 00:20:38,280
Well I think you're lovely.
353
00:20:39,440 --> 00:20:41,400
Even in the light.
354
00:20:41,480 --> 00:20:42,920
A beauty all your own.
355
00:20:44,360 --> 00:20:45,920
-Do you think?
-Yeah.
356
00:20:47,640 --> 00:20:49,720
And once you get past the accent and that,
357
00:20:50,800 --> 00:20:52,960
you always reminded me
a bit of Dawn French.
358
00:20:53,040 --> 00:20:55,600
Fucking hell, Mickey,
she's twice the size of me!
359
00:20:55,680 --> 00:20:57,240
But gorgeous.
360
00:20:57,320 --> 00:21:01,080
When Cilla asks me who her dad is
I want to be able to tell her.
361
00:21:02,040 --> 00:21:04,400
I want to look her in the eye
and give her his name.
362
00:21:07,960 --> 00:21:09,680
Must think I'm some kind of slut.
363
00:21:11,720 --> 00:21:15,320
Mam,
I'm a twenty first century type of guy.
364
00:21:15,400 --> 00:21:18,000
I've probably slept with more than that
on a busy weekend.
365
00:21:18,080 --> 00:21:20,000
You know, birds, obviously.
366
00:21:20,080 --> 00:21:21,240
Tits and stuff.
367
00:21:21,320 --> 00:21:22,520
Flange.
368
00:21:37,160 --> 00:21:40,880
Tell her Dad was the most handsome man
you'd ever met.
369
00:21:41,840 --> 00:21:44,400
That he was here on a fact-finding trip
from the States.
370
00:21:44,480 --> 00:21:47,240
Something to do with housing policy
371
00:21:47,320 --> 00:21:49,960
under a directive from "Baracks Obama."
372
00:21:50,960 --> 00:21:53,240
And you fell for his manly charms.
373
00:21:53,320 --> 00:21:57,040
The way his muscles strained against
the pure white cotton of his shirt.
374
00:21:57,120 --> 00:21:59,000
You had one night of love
375
00:21:59,080 --> 00:22:01,040
and Cilla was born from that love.
376
00:22:01,960 --> 00:22:04,280
Months later he found out
you was up the spout.
377
00:22:04,360 --> 00:22:06,760
Was on his way back,
died in a plane crash.
378
00:22:06,840 --> 00:22:09,080
Do you reckon she'll buy that?
379
00:22:09,160 --> 00:22:10,000
Yes.
380
00:22:12,040 --> 00:22:12,880
[kiss]
381
00:22:22,440 --> 00:22:24,440
Silver lining for your black cloud.
382
00:22:27,520 --> 00:22:28,640
[mellow music playing]
383
00:22:28,720 --> 00:22:34,280
♪ Will you ever know
That you're my hero? ♪
384
00:22:35,440 --> 00:22:38,360
♪ Everything I would like to be... ♪
385
00:22:39,680 --> 00:22:41,040
This is just a warm-up.
386
00:22:41,120 --> 00:22:43,160
-[Monica singing]
-When we have the real wake,
387
00:22:43,240 --> 00:22:46,960
we'll give our Debbie
one hell of a send off.
388
00:22:48,320 --> 00:22:51,440
We'll give her a celebration
she'll never forget.
389
00:22:51,520 --> 00:22:53,360
We'll never forget!
390
00:22:53,440 --> 00:22:55,600
[Monica] ♪ Wings ♪
[laughs]
391
00:22:55,680 --> 00:22:56,640
What are you having?
392
00:22:56,720 --> 00:23:00,920
Jamie, a drink
for the future Mrs Gallagher!
393
00:23:01,000 --> 00:23:02,640
No, I'm fine thanks, Monica.
394
00:23:02,720 --> 00:23:03,720
Are you sure?
395
00:23:03,800 --> 00:23:06,000
Don't worry. He's safe.
396
00:23:06,080 --> 00:23:08,040
It's just that we've got a past,
me and him.
397
00:23:08,120 --> 00:23:11,680
-[Frank] Past!
-I gave him the best years of my life.
398
00:23:11,760 --> 00:23:13,120
-[Frank] Twice!
-[laughs]
399
00:23:13,200 --> 00:23:18,680
He's all yours, Libby.
My heart belongs to another.
400
00:23:18,760 --> 00:23:20,640
My civil partner.
401
00:23:20,720 --> 00:23:23,920
I'm gay.
Got married in a posh tent in Devon.
402
00:23:24,000 --> 00:23:24,920
Are you shocked?
403
00:23:25,000 --> 00:23:26,440
I was just wondering--
404
00:23:26,520 --> 00:23:30,640
I'm so, so sorry. It's terrible
when your children die before you.
405
00:23:30,720 --> 00:23:32,520
Not nature's way.
406
00:23:32,600 --> 00:23:35,040
You have never lost a kid.
407
00:23:35,120 --> 00:23:38,880
I might as well have lost my Rodney.
For all the use he is.
408
00:23:38,960 --> 00:23:40,720
[Frank] Oh!
409
00:23:40,800 --> 00:23:43,560
I was just wondering
when you'd be coming back to the house?
410
00:23:43,640 --> 00:23:47,120
It's Liam. He needs his mum,
he needs you there.
411
00:23:47,200 --> 00:23:50,360
[scoffs] So I'm a bad mother now?
412
00:23:50,440 --> 00:23:52,360
No, no.
413
00:23:52,440 --> 00:23:55,280
Someone who can't even
produce a child of their own
414
00:23:55,360 --> 00:23:57,400
calling me a bad mother!
[fake crying]
415
00:23:57,480 --> 00:23:58,520
That's not what I said.
416
00:23:58,600 --> 00:24:03,000
Here's me grieving,
and she's telling me I'm a bad mother.
417
00:24:03,080 --> 00:24:04,640
I didn't. I didn't say that.
418
00:24:04,720 --> 00:24:09,040
Fuck sake, Libby. Show some sensitivity.
419
00:24:09,120 --> 00:24:11,600
You should be helping
instead of hindering.
420
00:24:11,680 --> 00:24:14,840
-[Monica weeping]
-It's all right. It's okay.
421
00:24:17,920 --> 00:24:18,920
[Monica] Uh!
422
00:24:21,160 --> 00:24:22,200
[door closes]
423
00:24:22,280 --> 00:24:23,520
About before...
424
00:24:23,600 --> 00:24:26,160
The less said from you the better.
425
00:24:26,240 --> 00:24:29,400
[Frank] You need to lie down
cos you're exhausted.
426
00:24:29,480 --> 00:24:31,240
[Patty] That baby will come out pie-eyed.
427
00:24:31,320 --> 00:24:32,360
[Frank] It's all right.
428
00:24:32,440 --> 00:24:34,840
She should be ashamed of herself.
429
00:24:34,920 --> 00:24:37,040
Everyone deals with grief
in different ways.
430
00:24:38,360 --> 00:24:41,760
And getting pissed and moving back in
with her ex is hers, I suppose?
431
00:24:43,240 --> 00:24:45,600
I thought you were cleverer than that.
432
00:24:48,800 --> 00:24:51,760
[Monica] Your aura's all wrong.
433
00:24:51,840 --> 00:24:53,640
For a soon to be married man.
434
00:24:53,720 --> 00:24:58,040
Oh, that'll be the small matter
of losing our daughter.
435
00:24:59,600 --> 00:25:01,400
Don't grieve, Love.
436
00:25:01,480 --> 00:25:04,680
She's on a higher plane.
437
00:25:04,760 --> 00:25:07,480
I studied under a Reiki master
in Glastonbury.
438
00:25:07,560 --> 00:25:08,680
[giggles]
439
00:25:08,760 --> 00:25:11,680
Three months in a yurt on Arthur's Seat.
440
00:25:13,280 --> 00:25:17,040
Your kundalini needs raising.
441
00:25:17,120 --> 00:25:21,160
Your chakras can't function properly.
442
00:25:21,240 --> 00:25:23,120
Oh, I feel for you.
443
00:25:23,200 --> 00:25:27,600
There is nothing wrong with me
other than the obvious.
444
00:25:29,960 --> 00:25:32,240
You're in denial.
445
00:25:32,320 --> 00:25:34,040
Spirits battling.
446
00:25:34,120 --> 00:25:37,360
"Am I doing the right thing?"
447
00:25:37,440 --> 00:25:41,560
If you mean Libby,
I am doing the right thing.
448
00:25:45,560 --> 00:25:47,960
-Someone needs to tell Fiona.
-[Patty] Then call her.
449
00:25:48,040 --> 00:25:50,080
It's not something you can do
over the phone.
450
00:25:50,160 --> 00:25:53,120
-She'll be upset. Need family with her.
-She's got a husband.
451
00:25:54,680 --> 00:25:56,240
I'll call you when I get there.
452
00:25:56,320 --> 00:25:58,280
And me and Fiona can drive over
and see Lip.
453
00:25:58,360 --> 00:26:00,480
There's no way I can let you leave.
454
00:26:01,640 --> 00:26:02,600
You can't stop me.
455
00:26:02,680 --> 00:26:05,080
Wait there, I'll fetch your mum and dad.
456
00:26:07,560 --> 00:26:08,480
[Libby] Liam's...
457
00:26:12,560 --> 00:26:16,440
Oh... Fuck!
458
00:26:22,480 --> 00:26:23,440
Lib.
459
00:26:23,520 --> 00:26:24,400
Ouch!
460
00:26:26,760 --> 00:26:28,240
It wasn't how it looked.
461
00:26:28,320 --> 00:26:31,480
Her on her knees?
You with your trousers round your ankles?
462
00:26:31,560 --> 00:26:33,360
Libby, she was just trying it on.
463
00:26:33,440 --> 00:26:36,840
You know, Indian head massages.
She was trying to raise me diphthong.
464
00:26:36,920 --> 00:26:40,440
You've got cold feet,
been having second thoughts, it's obvious.
465
00:26:40,520 --> 00:26:42,960
I've been having them ever
since we named the day.
466
00:26:45,400 --> 00:26:46,880
Ah, fuck.
467
00:26:49,080 --> 00:26:51,160
Look, I've been thinking
about me track record,
468
00:26:51,240 --> 00:26:53,880
and whether I've got the stamina
for another stab at matrimony,
469
00:26:53,960 --> 00:26:56,160
and the fact that I'm still here says yes!
470
00:26:57,120 --> 00:26:58,680
Says I still want to marry you.
471
00:26:59,520 --> 00:27:00,440
Doesn't it?
472
00:27:00,520 --> 00:27:02,120
I don't know.
473
00:27:06,560 --> 00:27:08,000
Nothing happened!
474
00:27:08,080 --> 00:27:11,200
And if you don't believe that,
let's call the whole thing off.
475
00:27:24,120 --> 00:27:26,160
I owe you an apology.
476
00:27:26,240 --> 00:27:29,160
I was rude, insensitive.
477
00:27:30,160 --> 00:27:33,760
Obviously I didn't know and, erm...
478
00:27:33,840 --> 00:27:34,920
I'm sorry.
479
00:27:36,880 --> 00:27:37,840
Cheers.
480
00:27:40,880 --> 00:27:42,760
How about you buy me a drink some time?
481
00:27:43,600 --> 00:27:44,480
Make up for it.
482
00:27:45,440 --> 00:27:46,400
I don't drink.
483
00:27:47,600 --> 00:27:49,360
I'm Muslim.
484
00:27:49,440 --> 00:27:50,880
You're not supposed to drink?
485
00:27:53,160 --> 00:27:55,360
What about summat to eat, then?
486
00:27:55,440 --> 00:27:57,560
-Muslims eat, don't they?
-It's been known.
487
00:27:57,640 --> 00:28:00,320
Chinese buffet in town,
all you can eat for a fiver.
488
00:28:08,560 --> 00:28:10,720
Can't blame a man for trying,
can you, Ches?
489
00:28:10,800 --> 00:28:13,200
Do yourself a favour, mate...
Don't go there.
490
00:28:13,280 --> 00:28:15,000
She's more trouble than she's worth.
491
00:28:15,080 --> 00:28:18,600
You'll never change him.
Two previous wives failed miserably.
492
00:28:18,680 --> 00:28:21,120
And you've got nothing
they weren't equipped with.
493
00:28:21,200 --> 00:28:22,600
It's time to admit defeat.
494
00:28:22,680 --> 00:28:23,760
Surrender.
495
00:28:24,640 --> 00:28:25,920
There's no shame in it.
496
00:28:28,840 --> 00:28:30,000
You want to be with me?
497
00:28:31,440 --> 00:28:32,360
Say it!
498
00:28:33,200 --> 00:28:34,280
I want to be with you.
499
00:28:34,360 --> 00:28:35,520
[steps from stairs]
500
00:28:39,320 --> 00:28:40,440
Say it again.
501
00:28:42,480 --> 00:28:44,080
I want to be with you.
502
00:28:45,160 --> 00:28:46,640
I want to marry you.
503
00:28:48,040 --> 00:28:48,880
Prove it.
504
00:28:54,480 --> 00:28:55,680
It's a start.
505
00:28:55,760 --> 00:28:58,520
Anyway, as soon as Milly's here
in the morning, I'll be gone.
506
00:28:58,600 --> 00:28:59,480
Good.
507
00:29:03,080 --> 00:29:05,480
That's my house, you old bitch!
508
00:29:08,520 --> 00:29:10,640
It stopped being your house
when you walked out.
509
00:29:10,720 --> 00:29:12,080
For the second time.
510
00:29:12,160 --> 00:29:14,760
Oh, give it a bloody rest, Liam!
511
00:29:14,840 --> 00:29:15,840
I had to go.
512
00:29:15,920 --> 00:29:17,840
This place was killing me,
and you know it.
513
00:29:17,920 --> 00:29:19,320
Why did you come back?
514
00:29:19,400 --> 00:29:20,760
For you.
515
00:29:20,840 --> 00:29:22,960
And Carl. Your sister's dead.
516
00:29:23,040 --> 00:29:25,440
-Why did you really come back?
-I'm your mother.
517
00:29:25,520 --> 00:29:27,000
-Isn't that reason enough?
-No.
518
00:29:28,200 --> 00:29:32,000
Anyway what's between your dad
and me is above right and wrong.
519
00:29:32,080 --> 00:29:33,920
No, not now!
520
00:29:34,000 --> 00:29:36,040
Someone's trying to get through.
521
00:29:36,120 --> 00:29:39,160
Away! Away! Get away from me!
522
00:29:53,640 --> 00:29:55,800
[wailing from downstairs]
523
00:30:01,840 --> 00:30:05,040
She came to me. Debbie came to me.
524
00:30:05,120 --> 00:30:06,320
[Monica] She can't rest.
525
00:30:06,400 --> 00:30:11,560
She was holding a dress, a wedding dress,
and she was shaking her head.
526
00:30:11,640 --> 00:30:14,120
[Patty] Came to you in a dream,
as opposed to
527
00:30:14,200 --> 00:30:16,200
you just having a dream?
528
00:30:16,280 --> 00:30:19,080
[Monica] You won't stifle my spirit
with your cynicism.
529
00:30:19,160 --> 00:30:22,040
I've had visitations in the past,
all proved true.
530
00:30:22,120 --> 00:30:25,360
A coalition government,
collapse of the banking system,
531
00:30:25,440 --> 00:30:27,400
Dannii Minogue's pregnancy.
532
00:30:27,480 --> 00:30:29,000
Her spirit's in torment.
533
00:30:29,080 --> 00:30:31,440
She can't pass over until she's healed.
534
00:30:33,080 --> 00:30:35,480
Only you can heal her, Frank.
535
00:30:35,560 --> 00:30:36,440
You have the power.
536
00:30:38,080 --> 00:30:39,160
[mobile rings]
537
00:30:42,200 --> 00:30:44,440
[Monica turns off mobile]
We've got to focus,
538
00:30:44,520 --> 00:30:45,640
concentrate.
539
00:30:45,720 --> 00:30:47,600
Can you switch your phones off?
540
00:30:47,680 --> 00:30:48,800
What's going on, Mum?
541
00:30:48,880 --> 00:30:51,680
Just clearing the channels.
She's trying to come through!
542
00:30:53,880 --> 00:30:54,760
[mobile ringing]
543
00:30:58,280 --> 00:30:59,480
It's bad spirits.
544
00:30:59,560 --> 00:31:01,040
[Monica hits mobile phone] Out!
545
00:31:02,160 --> 00:31:03,840
Out!
546
00:31:03,920 --> 00:31:05,040
Out!
547
00:31:06,440 --> 00:31:07,880
[door knocking]
548
00:31:09,000 --> 00:31:11,760
She's been trying to call you,
but your phone doesn't work.
549
00:31:11,840 --> 00:31:12,760
Who?
550
00:31:12,840 --> 00:31:14,200
Debbie.
551
00:31:18,280 --> 00:31:19,360
She's alive.
552
00:31:20,960 --> 00:31:22,000
Alive!
553
00:31:23,160 --> 00:31:25,920
[fireworks whistling, bursting]
554
00:31:34,520 --> 00:31:38,000
Don't be waiting for a wedding invitation,
you won't be invited.
555
00:31:38,080 --> 00:31:39,240
He'll let you down.
556
00:31:40,840 --> 00:31:42,000
Might take months,
557
00:31:42,080 --> 00:31:44,000
might take years...
558
00:31:45,280 --> 00:31:46,760
probably take weeks.
559
00:31:47,880 --> 00:31:49,320
But he'll let you down.
560
00:31:55,440 --> 00:31:56,680
[mouthing]
561
00:31:59,240 --> 00:32:01,960
It was just a joke, that got out of hand.
562
00:32:02,040 --> 00:32:03,600
You knew what you were doing, Mum.
563
00:32:03,680 --> 00:32:07,840
[Monica] I find out our marriage is over,
in a letter.
564
00:32:07,920 --> 00:32:08,760
A letter?
565
00:32:08,840 --> 00:32:11,280
-Brought it on yourself.
-Abandonment?
566
00:32:11,360 --> 00:32:13,400
I never even had him to abandon,
567
00:32:13,480 --> 00:32:16,480
he always had something more interesting
to occupy himself with
568
00:32:16,560 --> 00:32:17,760
than me or his kids.
569
00:32:18,800 --> 00:32:21,840
I just wanted to hurt him,
like he hurt me.
570
00:32:21,920 --> 00:32:23,920
So you tell him Debbie's dead to hurt him?
571
00:32:24,000 --> 00:32:26,240
All right, so I was wrong, naughty Mummy!
572
00:32:27,200 --> 00:32:28,600
You hurt the rest of us too.
573
00:32:28,680 --> 00:32:31,680
How dare he be so fucking happy!
574
00:32:36,000 --> 00:32:37,800
I've got 18 grand coming my way.
575
00:32:38,760 --> 00:32:39,680
Come with me.
576
00:32:39,760 --> 00:32:41,960
[exhales] No.
577
00:32:42,040 --> 00:32:43,280
Disneyland?
578
00:32:44,240 --> 00:32:45,560
Florida, not the shit one.
579
00:32:48,160 --> 00:32:51,080
[exhales] All right.
You'd better be off, then.
580
00:32:51,160 --> 00:32:53,120
I'll wait until the bus comes.
581
00:32:53,200 --> 00:32:57,120
It'll only make it worse.
Anyway, your dad'll need you.
582
00:32:57,200 --> 00:32:59,480
He'll be all right.
Stag night should sort him out.
583
00:32:59,560 --> 00:33:01,400
Stag night?
584
00:33:01,480 --> 00:33:03,040
Tonight. Bye.
585
00:33:31,720 --> 00:33:33,040
Jackson!
586
00:33:33,120 --> 00:33:34,440
Stag do, tonight?
587
00:33:34,520 --> 00:33:36,080
[Jackson] Sorry. I'm busy, Carl.
588
00:33:36,160 --> 00:33:37,080
Relatives coming.
589
00:33:37,160 --> 00:33:38,440
[Chesney] Lockdown!
590
00:33:38,520 --> 00:33:40,640
Forgot to tell you, they've cancelled.
591
00:33:40,720 --> 00:33:41,960
He'll be there.
592
00:33:43,960 --> 00:33:45,560
Fuck d'you do that for?
593
00:33:45,640 --> 00:33:48,600
It's the third time you've been asked
and the third time you've said no.
594
00:33:48,680 --> 00:33:50,840
What have I got in common
with any of them?
595
00:33:50,920 --> 00:33:54,920
Football, politics? I'm sure they might
not even have heard of Martin Luther King,
596
00:33:55,000 --> 00:33:57,480
and swung their pants to Bob Marley
in their time.
597
00:33:57,560 --> 00:33:59,480
-You think this is about colour?
-No.
598
00:33:59,560 --> 00:34:02,000
I think it's about you being an uptight,
599
00:34:02,080 --> 00:34:05,040
conceited tosspot
with a superiority complex.
600
00:34:05,120 --> 00:34:09,040
You're a trainee teacher,
not a fucking Nobel Prize winner.
601
00:34:09,120 --> 00:34:13,159
And if we've got any chance of fitting in
round here you'd do well to remember that.
602
00:34:15,280 --> 00:34:18,480
I am not having a stag do!
603
00:34:18,560 --> 00:34:20,120
[Carl] Look, we need to celebrate.
604
00:34:20,199 --> 00:34:22,560
Liam's coming as well
to keep an eye on him.
605
00:34:22,639 --> 00:34:25,120
Someone's got to make sure
he gets home and it ain't gonna be me.
606
00:34:25,199 --> 00:34:26,199
No, no, no.
607
00:34:26,280 --> 00:34:27,880
[Chesney] We need a theme.
608
00:34:27,960 --> 00:34:31,840
Come as your favourite blonde!
Er... Marilyn...
609
00:34:31,920 --> 00:34:33,600
Er... Madonna, Hulk Hogan.
610
00:34:33,679 --> 00:34:34,560
Elvis?
611
00:34:34,639 --> 00:34:36,120
Ooh, I am liking that one.
612
00:34:36,199 --> 00:34:38,560
Young Elvis, old Elvis, fat Elvis.
613
00:34:38,639 --> 00:34:42,120
Dead Elvis.
I am not fucking dressing up for anyone.
614
00:34:42,199 --> 00:34:44,360
Which means
there's only one thing for it, then.
615
00:34:50,639 --> 00:34:51,520
[refreshing sighs]
616
00:34:54,360 --> 00:34:56,280
[electronic dance music playing]
617
00:34:58,840 --> 00:35:01,360
-[Frank] Hand some beer, Jamie.
-Jackson, voddie chaser?
618
00:35:01,440 --> 00:35:03,680
Bit early, cheers, Jamie.
Half a lager'll do me.
619
00:35:03,760 --> 00:35:05,080
Good call, mate!
620
00:35:05,160 --> 00:35:07,080
[indistinct shouts and cheering]
621
00:35:10,280 --> 00:35:12,040
That'll loosen the fucker up a bit.
622
00:35:15,720 --> 00:35:16,840
Where's Frank's?
623
00:35:23,880 --> 00:35:25,520
That's more like it baby!
624
00:35:37,600 --> 00:35:40,560
-[techno music playing]
-[indistinct shouts]
625
00:35:40,640 --> 00:35:41,720
Yeah!
626
00:35:46,640 --> 00:35:48,280
Open them legs!
627
00:35:48,360 --> 00:35:49,640
Fuckin' have some of that!
628
00:35:49,720 --> 00:35:50,760
Uh, uh!
629
00:35:54,880 --> 00:35:56,160
[Chesney laughs]
630
00:36:10,200 --> 00:36:11,520
[Carl] Get up, lad!
631
00:36:11,600 --> 00:36:13,840
-Get up, lad!
-[all] Yeah!
632
00:36:13,920 --> 00:36:15,560
Party games!
633
00:36:15,640 --> 00:36:18,280
Oh, fuck that. How old do you think I am?
634
00:36:18,360 --> 00:36:19,680
[cheering]
635
00:36:21,680 --> 00:36:23,040
[Shane] Bouncy castle!
636
00:36:23,120 --> 00:36:24,000
[all] Yeah!
637
00:36:34,120 --> 00:36:35,280
[Shane] Pin the tail...
638
00:36:35,360 --> 00:36:36,560
on the donkey!
639
00:36:36,640 --> 00:36:38,400
[cheering]
640
00:36:44,680 --> 00:36:45,680
[man] Get it off!
641
00:36:47,720 --> 00:36:49,000
[indistinct shouts]
642
00:36:59,360 --> 00:37:01,280
[Frank] Yay!
643
00:37:01,360 --> 00:37:05,040
[all] Frank! Frank! Frank!
644
00:37:06,400 --> 00:37:07,760
[laughter]
645
00:37:07,840 --> 00:37:12,680
Hey, you know, to say that I was
not looking forward to tonight
646
00:37:12,760 --> 00:37:13,840
is an understatement.
647
00:37:13,920 --> 00:37:14,760
Ha! Obviously!
648
00:37:14,840 --> 00:37:17,440
But... it has been...
649
00:37:17,520 --> 00:37:21,560
fuckin' mon-u-fuckin'-mental.
650
00:37:21,640 --> 00:37:23,520
-[Chesney] Yeah!
-[Frank] Yeah, baby!
651
00:37:23,600 --> 00:37:25,040
Hey, do you know,
652
00:37:25,120 --> 00:37:29,640
It's times like this, when you, you...
653
00:37:29,720 --> 00:37:31,720
you know who your real friends are.
654
00:37:31,800 --> 00:37:33,640
[all] Aaah! We love you, too, Frank.
655
00:37:35,600 --> 00:37:37,520
[Chesney] Frank is getting emotional.
656
00:37:37,600 --> 00:37:39,960
Friends, brothers in arms,
657
00:37:40,040 --> 00:37:43,760
you know, who care, y'know,
who's willing to go that extra mile.
658
00:37:43,840 --> 00:37:45,080
[Jamie] Yeah, yeah...
659
00:37:45,160 --> 00:37:47,440
I think that's going a bit too far,
actually, mate.
660
00:37:47,520 --> 00:37:48,640
[all screaming]
661
00:37:53,920 --> 00:37:56,080
[Carl] Have a great night sleeping
in there!
662
00:37:57,280 --> 00:37:58,480
Bastards!
663
00:38:00,200 --> 00:38:01,360
You bast...
664
00:38:01,440 --> 00:38:04,000
[Frank shouts] Liam! Liam!
665
00:38:06,360 --> 00:38:09,400
Liam, Liam!
666
00:38:09,480 --> 00:38:11,120
[wolves howling]
667
00:38:15,040 --> 00:38:16,560
You look like shit, Mimi.
668
00:38:16,640 --> 00:38:20,200
And you sell your fanny for a living,
but do you hear me going on about that?
669
00:38:20,280 --> 00:38:22,800
What was it exactly
they were arrested for?
670
00:38:23,760 --> 00:38:27,480
["Chariots of Fire" by Vangelis]
671
00:38:31,400 --> 00:38:32,320
[scratching]
672
00:38:39,280 --> 00:38:41,040
So did Frank behave himself?
673
00:38:41,120 --> 00:38:42,120
I made sure of it.
674
00:38:42,200 --> 00:38:44,040
Home. Please. Now.
675
00:38:44,120 --> 00:38:45,840
Sorry?
676
00:38:45,920 --> 00:38:47,680
She's due a feed in an hour.
677
00:38:47,760 --> 00:38:50,160
-[Avril] Good night?
-Was all right.
678
00:38:50,240 --> 00:38:52,840
Wouldn't have bothered going
if you hadn't pushed me.
679
00:38:52,920 --> 00:38:54,880
Fry up back at home, Carl.
680
00:38:54,960 --> 00:38:57,080
Vitamin C and a darkened room.
681
00:38:59,840 --> 00:39:00,880
[policeman] Morning.
682
00:39:07,040 --> 00:39:08,040
Wait!
683
00:39:11,200 --> 00:39:12,240
Where's Frank?
684
00:39:17,480 --> 00:39:21,080
It was a night of revelry, high spirits.
685
00:39:21,160 --> 00:39:24,200
All I want to know is, where is he?
686
00:39:26,720 --> 00:39:30,440
Will you please take this seriously?
Frank is missing.
687
00:39:30,520 --> 00:39:35,160
The man I intend to marry has disappeared
and I need to know where he's got to!
688
00:39:35,240 --> 00:39:39,000
Off dipping his wick somewhere
it's not wanted. Spilling his seed.
689
00:39:40,120 --> 00:39:41,360
[Jamie] Look, we're sorry.
690
00:39:41,440 --> 00:39:44,400
-We really can't remember much.
-Where did you see him last?
691
00:39:45,640 --> 00:39:46,720
Before we proceed,
692
00:39:46,800 --> 00:39:49,400
I think Liam should leave the room.
This could get ugly.
693
00:39:49,480 --> 00:39:51,120
He's fine with ugly.
694
00:39:51,200 --> 00:39:53,600
That brass was a right minger,
weren't she? [giggles]
695
00:39:57,640 --> 00:39:59,680
[indistinct shouts]
696
00:40:05,560 --> 00:40:07,280
A prostitute?
697
00:40:07,360 --> 00:40:08,360
No offence.
698
00:40:08,440 --> 00:40:11,680
None taken.
Even I draw the line at prepubescent.
699
00:40:11,760 --> 00:40:13,600
And whose bright idea was that?
700
00:40:13,680 --> 00:40:15,760
What were you doing in a brothel?
701
00:40:15,840 --> 00:40:18,160
You weren't treating
Frank to anything, were you?
702
00:40:18,240 --> 00:40:19,480
No. He weren't there, then.
703
00:40:19,560 --> 00:40:20,840
-He'd left.
-Left?
704
00:40:20,920 --> 00:40:22,880
You let him go? On his own?
705
00:40:22,960 --> 00:40:24,640
Libby, we were pissed.
706
00:40:26,920 --> 00:40:28,680
What those men did...
707
00:40:28,760 --> 00:40:31,160
To call them men!
708
00:40:31,240 --> 00:40:34,640
Your first time only happens once
and it shouldn't happen at the age of 12,
709
00:40:34,720 --> 00:40:37,600
shoved into a room with a woman old enough
to be your mother.
710
00:40:37,680 --> 00:40:38,920
She was eighteen.
711
00:40:39,000 --> 00:40:40,440
I don't know if that's worse.
712
00:40:42,480 --> 00:40:43,360
We didn't do it.
713
00:40:44,920 --> 00:40:46,000
You mean you're...
714
00:40:47,280 --> 00:40:48,880
intacto?
715
00:40:48,960 --> 00:40:52,320
I'm not sure that term applies
to the male of the species.
716
00:40:52,400 --> 00:40:56,160
I gave her the money for her time,
won it back in a game of three-card brag.
717
00:40:56,240 --> 00:40:58,640
Kept enough for a fish supper,
and a cab home.
718
00:41:01,040 --> 00:41:03,800
When was the last time you saw him?
719
00:41:03,880 --> 00:41:06,000
Think, Liam, please.
720
00:41:07,040 --> 00:41:08,240
In the cemetery.
721
00:41:09,800 --> 00:41:11,080
He'll be all right.
722
00:41:11,160 --> 00:41:12,520
I know he will be.
723
00:41:16,200 --> 00:41:17,800
Yeah.
724
00:41:17,880 --> 00:41:18,720
No.
725
00:41:19,840 --> 00:41:21,720
Yeah, but no.
726
00:41:21,800 --> 00:41:25,440
But it can't be, "Yeah, but no."
You either saw him or you didn't.
727
00:41:25,520 --> 00:41:28,160
It was someone like that, but black.
728
00:41:28,240 --> 00:41:30,480
This guy was dressed like that,
but a dwarf.
729
00:41:30,560 --> 00:41:32,400
No, he was definitely Asian.
730
00:41:32,480 --> 00:41:34,840
He had a terrible problem with saliva.
731
00:41:34,920 --> 00:41:36,000
Kept dribbling.
732
00:41:42,760 --> 00:41:44,240
These are from Mimi.
733
00:41:44,320 --> 00:41:46,680
You told her
we were having Libby's hen do here?
734
00:41:46,760 --> 00:41:48,120
-Mm-hmm.
-Why?
735
00:41:48,200 --> 00:41:51,800
Cos Libby needs cheering up,
and I fancy a bit of female company.
736
00:41:51,880 --> 00:41:52,960
Who's invited?
737
00:41:53,040 --> 00:41:55,960
Plenty more where this came from.
Loads left in the kitty, too.
738
00:41:56,040 --> 00:41:57,960
We can splash what's left on a stripper.
739
00:41:58,040 --> 00:42:01,840
Bit of a busman's holiday
for me, Lillian. No cock, please.
740
00:42:01,920 --> 00:42:05,280
So, lager, cider, vodka, mixers.
741
00:42:05,360 --> 00:42:07,920
-And no cock.
-I'll have a cock, if it's on offer.
742
00:42:08,000 --> 00:42:10,800
-You'll have to bring your own.
-Can we not just have a little cock?
743
00:42:10,880 --> 00:42:13,160
Well, a little one's
hardly worth having, is it?
744
00:42:15,840 --> 00:42:18,360
[rock music playing]
745
00:42:18,440 --> 00:42:19,960
[Jackson] Just off to the pub.
746
00:42:20,040 --> 00:42:22,040
Don't do anything I wouldn't do.
747
00:42:22,880 --> 00:42:24,600
Don't rush back.
748
00:42:24,680 --> 00:42:25,520
And, ladies!
749
00:42:25,600 --> 00:42:26,640
Sorry.
750
00:42:26,720 --> 00:42:29,760
Can I just ask that you don't touch
the vinyl? Collector's items.
751
00:42:29,840 --> 00:42:32,000
Alphabetised, would you believe?
752
00:42:32,080 --> 00:42:34,440
I would, if I knew what it meant.
753
00:42:34,520 --> 00:42:36,520
I should move this, too.
754
00:42:36,600 --> 00:42:37,680
[Lillian] Bloody hell,
755
00:42:37,760 --> 00:42:40,160
-looks like a brewery under here.
-[Jackson] Ah, shit!
756
00:42:40,240 --> 00:42:41,560
You've not toasted Libby yet!
757
00:42:41,640 --> 00:42:44,200
And you're not getting out of here
until you do.
758
00:42:56,240 --> 00:43:00,320
Put a smile on your face,
for everyone else's sake, if not your own.
759
00:43:00,400 --> 00:43:03,800
Something's wrong, Mum. I can feel it.
760
00:43:03,880 --> 00:43:07,520
Liam said he's done this type of thing
a thousand times when he was with Monica.
761
00:43:07,600 --> 00:43:10,400
But he's never done it once
while he's been with me.
762
00:43:10,480 --> 00:43:12,360
Maybe he's got cold feet.
763
00:43:12,440 --> 00:43:15,240
There's no maybe about it,
the man doesn't want to marry you.
764
00:43:15,320 --> 00:43:17,520
What more does he need to do
to convince you?
765
00:43:17,600 --> 00:43:19,560
You're determined to see me unhappy.
766
00:43:19,640 --> 00:43:21,400
I'm determined to make you see sense.
767
00:43:21,480 --> 00:43:25,840
You asked him to prove he loved you,
and he's failed miserably. End of story.
768
00:43:28,560 --> 00:43:29,680
[pop music playing]
769
00:43:29,760 --> 00:43:30,600
[Jamie] All right?
770
00:43:30,680 --> 00:43:32,640
Don't mind, do you?
The pub was a bit empty.
771
00:43:32,720 --> 00:43:34,680
[Avril]
Food's that way, booze on the table.
772
00:43:34,760 --> 00:43:38,280
Anything could land us in Court's
in the backyard, and at your own risk.
773
00:43:42,000 --> 00:43:43,440
How many's he had?
774
00:43:44,640 --> 00:43:45,720
One.
775
00:43:46,680 --> 00:43:48,040
Yes, lads! You made it!
776
00:43:48,120 --> 00:43:49,280
[cheering]
777
00:43:49,360 --> 00:43:50,200
[Micky] Jackson!
778
00:43:50,280 --> 00:43:54,600
I think Mum might be right.
Maybe I pushed him too far,
779
00:43:54,680 --> 00:43:56,640
made too many demands.
780
00:43:56,720 --> 00:43:58,200
Maybe I've frightened him off.
781
00:43:59,520 --> 00:44:03,320
Maybe he's sleeping off
the mother of all hangovers,
782
00:44:03,400 --> 00:44:06,120
and you'll see him bright
and bushy-eyed tomorrow morning.
783
00:44:07,480 --> 00:44:10,800
Chill, Libs. Stress is a killer!
784
00:44:10,880 --> 00:44:14,160
Never happier than when she's got
something to complain about.
785
00:44:15,200 --> 00:44:17,040
[all women cheering]
786
00:44:17,120 --> 00:44:18,480
Will you look at that?
787
00:44:21,360 --> 00:44:22,640
Terrible behaviour.
788
00:44:22,720 --> 00:44:25,280
Off! Off! Off!
789
00:44:25,360 --> 00:44:27,360
Off! Off! Off!
790
00:44:31,120 --> 00:44:32,800
What is it you're on, Mimi?
791
00:44:37,520 --> 00:44:39,200
[all] Off! Off! Off!
792
00:44:46,000 --> 00:44:46,880
[all shut up]
793
00:44:46,960 --> 00:44:48,560
[Patty] Holy Mother preserve us!
794
00:44:56,600 --> 00:44:58,720
Come on, Mimi, it's not that big!
795
00:44:58,800 --> 00:44:59,640
Come on, Mum.
796
00:44:59,720 --> 00:45:00,600
Mum?
797
00:45:01,520 --> 00:45:02,760
Oh, fuck! Ambulance. Quick!
798
00:45:02,840 --> 00:45:04,280
[Micky] Mam? Mam!
799
00:45:04,360 --> 00:45:06,520
-[Jamie] Shit. Gis your phone.
-[Micky] Mam?
800
00:45:14,480 --> 00:45:15,600
[Kelly] Good luck, Mimi!
801
00:45:18,440 --> 00:45:20,120
[siren wailing]
802
00:45:28,400 --> 00:45:30,320
Frank!
803
00:45:30,400 --> 00:45:32,760
[echoes] Frank!
804
00:45:33,960 --> 00:45:38,120
[Frank] And even if you do find
that you are indeed
805
00:45:38,200 --> 00:45:41,040
the only being in existence
806
00:45:41,120 --> 00:45:45,280
and that everyone else,
everything else in your world
807
00:45:45,360 --> 00:45:48,480
is merely a figment of your imagination.
808
00:45:48,560 --> 00:45:51,720
Just enjoy it!
809
00:45:51,800 --> 00:45:53,800
[thunder-like sound]
810
00:46:10,840 --> 00:46:12,920
[Monica] I heard a whisper
that Frank's missing.
811
00:46:13,000 --> 00:46:14,760
[Frank] Libby!
We have to get back to Libby!
812
00:46:14,840 --> 00:46:16,400
[Jamie] You're not up
to running the business.
813
00:46:16,480 --> 00:46:17,400
Bollocks!
814
00:46:17,480 --> 00:46:18,800
I'm married to the head of the family now.
815
00:46:18,880 --> 00:46:21,200
[loud moaning]
816
00:46:21,280 --> 00:46:23,480
[Patty] So if I make a complaint,
you could lose your job?
817
00:46:23,560 --> 00:46:26,160
[Monica] Liam and Stella are my babies,
and they should be with me.
818
00:46:26,240 --> 00:46:28,120
[Jamie] If it carries on like this
819
00:46:28,200 --> 00:46:29,920
we'll lose the business
or someone'll get hurt.
820
00:46:30,000 --> 00:46:31,680
Finish it now!
821
00:46:31,760 --> 00:46:33,120
[yells] Yes!
822
00:46:33,200 --> 00:46:34,320
Yes!
823
00:46:34,400 --> 00:46:36,160
[Avril] You called the council.
824
00:46:36,240 --> 00:46:38,000
[Carl]
You're not taking Liam and Stella away.
825
00:46:38,080 --> 00:46:40,000
[Libby] We have got to find your father.
826
00:47:23,800 --> 00:47:26,040
[Frank] You hear about
these alien abductions
827
00:47:26,120 --> 00:47:29,720
and it's all terror and fear.
One-eyed green monsters
828
00:47:29,800 --> 00:47:33,400
dragging you 'across the universe
to aid their experiments.
829
00:47:35,280 --> 00:47:37,440
But that's not been my experience.
830
00:47:39,520 --> 00:47:42,160
Quite the opposite, in fact.
831
00:47:42,240 --> 00:47:44,440
No complaints thus far.
832
00:47:44,520 --> 00:47:46,520
No interference of any sort, you know,
833
00:47:46,600 --> 00:47:49,720
no temperature taken, no
blood pressure, no blood samples.
834
00:47:49,800 --> 00:47:52,360
Even managed to escape
the old anal probing.
835
00:47:57,680 --> 00:47:59,640
I think I spoke too soon.
836
00:48:04,760 --> 00:48:07,520
Argh!
837
00:48:09,040 --> 00:48:10,280
[moans in pain]
60373
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