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1
00:00:05,630 --> 00:00:09,390
♪
2
00:00:09,430 --> 00:00:10,590
(breathing heavily) hi.
3
00:00:12,820 --> 00:00:13,840
Hello.
4
00:00:15,410 --> 00:00:16,600
There you are.
5
00:00:16,680 --> 00:00:18,440
What is the deal?
Where is she?
6
00:00:18,510 --> 00:00:19,660
Hair and makeup
are doing finals.
7
00:00:19,740 --> 00:00:21,330
She'll be out any minute.
8
00:00:21,410 --> 00:00:24,060
Cue cards? Really?
She has three lines to remember.
9
00:00:24,060 --> 00:00:26,360
Yeah, but with copy this good,
she wants to make sure
10
00:00:26,360 --> 00:00:28,020
To really nail it.
I'm sorry.
11
00:00:28,020 --> 00:00:30,270
When the agency wanted that guy
who ate all those hot dogs,
12
00:00:30,340 --> 00:00:33,680
It was me who fought for bella
because I'm old enough
13
00:00:33,750 --> 00:00:35,530
To remember when
she was a big deal.
14
00:00:35,530 --> 00:00:39,020
And I thought you were just
fresh out of film school.
15
00:00:39,090 --> 00:00:40,610
(sighing)
okay, listen,
16
00:00:40,690 --> 00:00:43,620
Bella is incredibly humbled that
you chose her to represent,
17
00:00:43,700 --> 00:00:47,470
Um... Oma wender's
christmas soda.
18
00:00:47,500 --> 00:00:48,620
No.
19
00:00:48,690 --> 00:00:50,440
- That sounds delicious--
- no, darling.
20
00:00:50,470 --> 00:00:54,120
You are not going to
make me wear this santa hat.
21
00:00:54,200 --> 00:00:55,790
I didn't spend
an hour in the chair,
22
00:00:55,830 --> 00:00:57,700
So that I could look like
someone who just waltzed
23
00:00:57,780 --> 00:00:59,980
Out of deep discount depot.
24
00:01:00,060 --> 00:01:02,600
No, no. You look... Fabulous.
25
00:01:02,630 --> 00:01:05,680
All right, let's get
final touches in here.
26
00:01:07,400 --> 00:01:09,550
Okay, let's hurry up.
27
00:01:09,630 --> 00:01:10,840
Okay, thank you.
28
00:01:10,920 --> 00:01:13,860
Thank you, that's good.
Thank you. Excellent.
29
00:01:16,070 --> 00:01:17,910
Gorgeous!
30
00:01:17,990 --> 00:01:21,780
Okay, I think we're ready to go.
Ready, bella? Action!
31
00:01:21,820 --> 00:01:25,580
Hello, I'm comedienne
bella deldomino,
32
00:01:25,660 --> 00:01:27,620
Here to share
33
00:01:27,620 --> 00:01:30,400
My favorite holiday treat
34
00:01:30,480 --> 00:01:34,810
From ardenville's
historic craft soda makers,
35
00:01:34,850 --> 00:01:37,840
Oma wenders.
36
00:01:40,760 --> 00:01:41,840
(gasping)
37
00:01:41,850 --> 00:01:43,430
(chuckling)
(in raspy voice:) oh!
38
00:01:43,510 --> 00:01:45,170
Yes! Um...
39
00:01:45,250 --> 00:01:47,350
Just like christmas.
40
00:01:47,350 --> 00:01:48,590
Um, cut.
41
00:01:48,660 --> 00:01:50,440
Can we take five?
Aubri!
42
00:01:50,440 --> 00:01:52,440
Can we just take five?
Five.
43
00:01:52,440 --> 00:01:53,760
Take five.
44
00:01:53,830 --> 00:01:56,010
- (gasping)
- hi. Okay. You good?
45
00:01:56,090 --> 00:01:59,600
Let me tell you...
When my taste buds grow back.
46
00:01:59,670 --> 00:02:01,110
Well, if you get it
in the next take,
47
00:02:01,120 --> 00:02:02,540
You won't have
to drink anymore.
48
00:02:02,620 --> 00:02:03,990
I can't do it.
49
00:02:04,030 --> 00:02:06,880
What do you mean you can't?
50
00:02:06,960 --> 00:02:09,460
- I'm sober now.
- It's not alcoholic.
51
00:02:09,460 --> 00:02:10,830
You're joking.
52
00:02:10,870 --> 00:02:12,500
Uh... What do you
propose we do?
53
00:02:12,540 --> 00:02:15,750
Fill it up with paint thinner;
it'd go down a lot easier.
54
00:02:15,790 --> 00:02:17,300
Ladies?
55
00:02:17,300 --> 00:02:19,310
Just one second, please.
56
00:02:19,380 --> 00:02:21,540
Okay, I can go grab a bucket,
and then you can take a sip,
57
00:02:21,620 --> 00:02:24,380
And then you can spit it right
out, and then they can--
58
00:02:24,460 --> 00:02:26,460
They can cut to a shot of
a bottle or something.
59
00:02:26,530 --> 00:02:28,120
- Can you handle that?
- Okay.
60
00:02:28,200 --> 00:02:31,300
But don't you ever say that I
never did anything for you.
61
00:02:31,380 --> 00:02:33,460
Well, we don't have
all day to go over everything
62
00:02:33,540 --> 00:02:35,560
That is wrong about
the sentence you just said.
63
00:02:35,590 --> 00:02:37,040
I'd love to listen
to you, darling,
64
00:02:37,080 --> 00:02:40,050
But I'm kind of
trapped in that moment.
65
00:02:40,050 --> 00:02:42,820
Okay, I, uh, will go
speak to the director.
66
00:02:42,820 --> 00:02:45,220
(gasping) oh!
67
00:02:45,250 --> 00:02:46,550
- Uh...
- Oh!
68
00:02:46,590 --> 00:02:49,370
The thing is,
when bella was six years old,
69
00:02:49,410 --> 00:02:53,740
The color green was very
triggering for her.
70
00:02:53,740 --> 00:02:56,660
Oh, darlings,
thank you so much.
71
00:02:56,700 --> 00:03:00,270
You were all
so wonderful to work with. Oh!
72
00:03:00,300 --> 00:03:04,070
Now, if you ever need
tickets to the comedy club,
73
00:03:04,100 --> 00:03:08,160
Just reach out to aubri,
day or night.
74
00:03:08,240 --> 00:03:10,440
Day, please, thank you.
75
00:03:10,520 --> 00:03:12,520
Okay, we need to get
downtown asap, okay?
76
00:03:12,520 --> 00:03:13,900
What for?
77
00:03:13,930 --> 00:03:16,670
For the interview. I sent you
the questions last night.
78
00:03:16,750 --> 00:03:18,230
Did you pick your
favorite christmas memory?
79
00:03:18,270 --> 00:03:21,440
I can't because the really
good ones I can't remember,
80
00:03:21,510 --> 00:03:24,510
And the other ones, I'd be
breaking an nda to share them.
81
00:03:24,590 --> 00:03:26,530
What am I gonna say?
82
00:03:26,530 --> 00:03:29,460
Bella, you pay me to write your
jokes, not your life story.
83
00:03:29,540 --> 00:03:31,930
What about when you were
writing my autobiography?
84
00:03:31,930 --> 00:03:33,540
There must be something there.
85
00:03:33,540 --> 00:03:35,800
We didn't get past
the chapter on pre-nups.
86
00:03:35,880 --> 00:03:37,100
Oh...
87
00:03:37,210 --> 00:03:39,030
Okay. You said last christmas
was your favorite ever.
88
00:03:39,140 --> 00:03:41,110
Why don't we work off of
something like that?
89
00:03:41,220 --> 00:03:44,310
It was great.
My set just killed;
90
00:03:44,390 --> 00:03:46,280
I booked two late-night
gigs out of that.
91
00:03:46,310 --> 00:03:49,310
I just want to be more
relatable, you know?
92
00:03:49,390 --> 00:03:51,280
I don't want to be
all show business-y.
93
00:03:51,320 --> 00:03:53,100
I want to be more ordinary,
94
00:03:53,140 --> 00:03:55,370
You know,
like you or one of them.
95
00:03:55,410 --> 00:03:57,130
Okay, uh...
96
00:03:57,210 --> 00:03:59,220
Okay, when I was a kid,
growing up,
97
00:03:59,300 --> 00:04:00,550
All my cousins,
aunts and uncles,
98
00:04:00,630 --> 00:04:02,050
They would stay
over on christmas eve
99
00:04:02,130 --> 00:04:03,890
So we could open the gifts
together in the morning,
100
00:04:03,960 --> 00:04:06,630
And, oh, this,
this was my time to shine--
101
00:04:06,670 --> 00:04:08,120
Aubri, if you're
trying to convince me
102
00:04:08,150 --> 00:04:09,630
To never have children,
103
00:04:09,670 --> 00:04:12,820
Darling,
that ship has sailed.
104
00:04:12,900 --> 00:04:14,670
But mom actually
would stop me
105
00:04:14,670 --> 00:04:17,920
At 8 p.M. To honor santa's
favorite song, "silent night",
106
00:04:17,920 --> 00:04:19,130
Because she said that santa
107
00:04:19,160 --> 00:04:21,400
Actually wouldn't
fill my stockings
108
00:04:21,480 --> 00:04:24,830
If I played the part
of tiny tim after sundown,
109
00:04:24,910 --> 00:04:26,580
And you know,
when I think about it now,
110
00:04:26,580 --> 00:04:28,020
Actually, I think she was--
111
00:04:28,100 --> 00:04:29,970
And you know santa was right,
darling.
112
00:04:30,010 --> 00:04:31,310
Shh!
113
00:04:31,310 --> 00:04:34,140
I'm almost dizzy
from listening to you.
114
00:04:34,180 --> 00:04:38,600
Now, make that a whole lot
shorter and a whole lot funnier.
115
00:04:38,610 --> 00:04:41,200
We've got an interview
on our hands.
116
00:04:41,200 --> 00:04:44,450
I-I was, uh,
being vulnerable, but...
117
00:04:44,530 --> 00:04:48,220
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, I got the door. Here.
118
00:04:48,300 --> 00:04:50,330
Aubri?
119
00:04:54,480 --> 00:04:57,210
I really hope those
deliveries get here today.
120
00:04:58,340 --> 00:05:00,190
All these people
performed here?
121
00:05:00,270 --> 00:05:03,640
Yep, it actually used to be
a speakeasy back in the '20s,
122
00:05:03,640 --> 00:05:07,130
Before becoming
a hot spot for comedians.
123
00:05:07,140 --> 00:05:09,710
Mike baxter?
I love his movies.
124
00:05:09,790 --> 00:05:11,290
Oh, the old ones,
125
00:05:11,370 --> 00:05:13,180
Before he started playing
addicts and fathers.
126
00:05:13,220 --> 00:05:14,800
What?
No, I love those.
127
00:05:14,880 --> 00:05:17,620
His comedy is, I don't know, a
little bit too juvenile for me.
128
00:05:17,650 --> 00:05:19,320
Well, that's his early stuff,
129
00:05:19,400 --> 00:05:21,220
Right after Saturday
sketch club.
130
00:05:21,260 --> 00:05:24,070
With all these people here,
131
00:05:24,070 --> 00:05:25,810
How could you not sell out
the christmas variety show?
132
00:05:25,890 --> 00:05:28,750
Because none of these people
ever came back to the club.
133
00:05:28,820 --> 00:05:30,420
No, no,
they work on their material
134
00:05:30,450 --> 00:05:31,730
On our small
suburban stage,
135
00:05:31,770 --> 00:05:35,120
And then they ride off
into the sunset.
136
00:05:36,190 --> 00:05:37,920
So, who do you have
booked so far?
137
00:05:37,960 --> 00:05:40,460
We've got a couple
of local bands, ooh,
138
00:05:40,460 --> 00:05:42,490
And a mark twain
impersonator.
139
00:05:42,560 --> 00:05:44,730
Although, he says he only
does late twain.
140
00:05:44,760 --> 00:05:45,990
It's not my fault.
141
00:05:46,070 --> 00:05:48,380
Everybody is booked
for the holidays.
142
00:05:48,420 --> 00:05:50,790
Hey, cuz, what happens if you
don't sell it out?
143
00:05:50,860 --> 00:05:52,100
Well, let's see...
144
00:05:52,140 --> 00:05:54,020
I lose my job,
hopes and dreams dashed,
145
00:05:54,100 --> 00:05:56,110
Five of the best years
of my life wasted.
146
00:05:56,140 --> 00:05:58,020
Oh, and I get to move
back in with my mom.
147
00:05:58,020 --> 00:05:59,190
So, there's that.
148
00:05:59,260 --> 00:06:00,540
Oh, yikes.
149
00:06:00,610 --> 00:06:02,150
The club's not that big.
150
00:06:02,150 --> 00:06:03,650
How hard could it be
to sell it out?
151
00:06:03,650 --> 00:06:05,020
On christmas eve?
152
00:06:05,030 --> 00:06:07,420
The one night where
people actually prefer
153
00:06:07,450 --> 00:06:09,200
To stay home
with their families?
154
00:06:09,280 --> 00:06:10,760
- It's not gonna be easy.
- Yeah.
155
00:06:10,840 --> 00:06:12,850
Guess santa is the only one
you ever hear about
156
00:06:12,930 --> 00:06:14,540
Leaving his home
on christmas eve, huh?
157
00:06:14,580 --> 00:06:16,360
- (chuckling)
- (phone ringing)
158
00:06:16,470 --> 00:06:18,930
- You think I'm doomed?
- Nah.
159
00:06:18,970 --> 00:06:20,390
I will start by putting
this on the platform.
160
00:06:20,470 --> 00:06:21,790
Oh, actually,
161
00:06:21,790 --> 00:06:23,570
Do you mind signing
for the deliveries,
162
00:06:23,650 --> 00:06:25,850
And then I will manage
to get this guy up there.
163
00:06:25,890 --> 00:06:26,950
Yeah.
164
00:06:27,020 --> 00:06:28,520
Okay.
(sighing)
165
00:06:28,560 --> 00:06:31,360
Oh! You're heavy.
Okay.
166
00:06:31,390 --> 00:06:32,930
All right.
167
00:06:34,990 --> 00:06:37,060
(door closing)
168
00:06:40,770 --> 00:06:43,270
Two steps left.
Ehh...
169
00:06:43,310 --> 00:06:45,800
My right, actually.
Spin!
170
00:06:45,880 --> 00:06:48,080
Big spin!
Excellent form.
171
00:06:48,090 --> 00:06:50,150
Will you two be performing
at the open mic on Thursday?
172
00:06:50,180 --> 00:06:51,490
Well, he's a little shy
173
00:06:51,570 --> 00:06:55,160
Because, last time,
he melted in front of...
174
00:06:56,620 --> 00:06:59,700
Uh, mike... Baxter. What are--
175
00:06:59,740 --> 00:07:01,510
(clearing throat)
what are you doing here?
176
00:07:01,580 --> 00:07:03,980
Uh, just seeing if I have a
future in choreography.
177
00:07:03,980 --> 00:07:05,110
Hi, mike.
178
00:07:05,260 --> 00:07:07,410
- Hi. What's your name?
- Uh, aubri wilson.
179
00:07:07,450 --> 00:07:08,630
- Hi.
- Sorry, I didn't...
180
00:07:08,630 --> 00:07:10,000
Just I didn't hear about your...
181
00:07:10,150 --> 00:07:12,630
No, I'm sorry for
the frosty dance.
182
00:07:12,670 --> 00:07:15,260
I, uh...
I just thought I'd stop by.
183
00:07:15,260 --> 00:07:16,580
This is where
I got my big break.
184
00:07:16,580 --> 00:07:17,820
I saw that the--
185
00:07:17,860 --> 00:07:19,690
Mike baxter?
Is that you, mike baxter?
186
00:07:19,770 --> 00:07:23,350
Shouldn't you be out
losing millions of dollars
187
00:07:23,350 --> 00:07:24,750
For a studio somewhere?
188
00:07:24,830 --> 00:07:27,010
Bella deldomino.
189
00:07:27,080 --> 00:07:29,260
They told me to
take the season off.
190
00:07:29,340 --> 00:07:31,650
Something about chapter 11.
I don't know.
191
00:07:31,650 --> 00:07:34,100
But what brought you
back here from the mount?
192
00:07:34,170 --> 00:07:36,040
Oh, you know, christmas
is a time for charity,
193
00:07:36,080 --> 00:07:39,210
So I started thinking, "who do I
know that needs help the most?"
194
00:07:39,290 --> 00:07:40,620
And immediately,
you came to mind.
195
00:07:40,620 --> 00:07:43,680
Oh, still as sweet as ever.
196
00:07:43,720 --> 00:07:46,290
Tell me, how does a guy get
stage time these days, huh?
197
00:07:46,290 --> 00:07:48,710
Oh, come on, mike.
You're a big hollywood star.
198
00:07:48,790 --> 00:07:50,210
You don't need
to be doing stand-up.
199
00:07:50,280 --> 00:07:51,780
Well, it sounds like my agent
already got to you.
200
00:07:51,860 --> 00:07:54,300
Well, I'm up for
this big action movie,
201
00:07:54,300 --> 00:07:57,890
A superhero thing
called rooster man.
202
00:07:57,890 --> 00:07:59,460
It's a working title.
203
00:07:59,540 --> 00:08:02,020
A-ha! Will the special effects
people,
204
00:08:02,050 --> 00:08:04,890
Will they be able to
finally make you funny?
205
00:08:04,960 --> 00:08:08,110
Or will they just have
you shooting laser beams?
206
00:08:08,140 --> 00:08:09,480
Well, he's a superhero
207
00:08:09,480 --> 00:08:11,300
With a sense of humor,
208
00:08:11,380 --> 00:08:14,580
So I thought I'd try to remind
hollywood and you, apparently,
209
00:08:14,660 --> 00:08:16,080
That I'm still hilarious.
210
00:08:16,160 --> 00:08:17,810
Absolutely. Well, you know,
this is not
211
00:08:17,810 --> 00:08:20,080
Our busiest time of the year,
darling, as you know.
212
00:08:20,160 --> 00:08:21,480
But maybe it
will be with you here.
213
00:08:21,560 --> 00:08:26,160
I mean, you're welcome to step
on that stage any time, sir.
214
00:08:26,190 --> 00:08:28,330
Well, I really appreciate that.
215
00:08:28,360 --> 00:08:30,760
The competition looks fierce.
216
00:08:30,840 --> 00:08:34,250
I hear she has a line on a
fantastic dancing snowman act.
217
00:08:34,330 --> 00:08:36,400
Yes, if he can
get over his nerves,
218
00:08:36,440 --> 00:08:38,260
We might really have something.
219
00:08:38,260 --> 00:08:40,200
You guys are trying
to make a joke about me.
220
00:08:40,280 --> 00:08:41,770
I don't think it's funny.
221
00:08:41,850 --> 00:08:43,230
Bella, if I was
making a joke about you,
222
00:08:43,230 --> 00:08:45,080
I definitely would have
mentioned your jewelry.
223
00:08:45,110 --> 00:08:46,260
How does your neck stay up?
224
00:08:46,340 --> 00:08:47,910
Do you have
a chiropractor on call?
225
00:08:48,020 --> 00:08:49,430
Mikey, mikey,
226
00:08:49,510 --> 00:08:53,120
You're reminding me,
giving me flashbacks
227
00:08:53,120 --> 00:08:56,110
Of that day you
left for california. Oh!
228
00:08:56,190 --> 00:08:57,190
I was so happy that day.
229
00:08:57,220 --> 00:08:58,440
All right, I gotta go.
230
00:08:58,470 --> 00:09:00,030
Nice to meet you, aubri.
231
00:09:00,110 --> 00:09:01,930
It is so nice to see you.
232
00:09:01,960 --> 00:09:05,300
Hi.
What the--
233
00:09:05,370 --> 00:09:06,710
Howdy.
234
00:09:06,750 --> 00:09:08,800
That was mike baxter.
235
00:09:08,840 --> 00:09:10,620
Oh, yeah. You missed me a lot.
236
00:09:10,650 --> 00:09:11,990
How does he know your name?
237
00:09:12,060 --> 00:09:14,060
You are getting
the deliveries next time.
238
00:09:14,090 --> 00:09:16,040
Bella:
Thank you so much for having us.
239
00:09:16,150 --> 00:09:19,340
Drxl is our favorite station.
240
00:09:20,810 --> 00:09:23,110
Hey, I brought
you some coffee.
241
00:09:23,150 --> 00:09:25,100
Oh, you're a lifesaver.
Just in time.
242
00:09:25,140 --> 00:09:28,300
Oh, they're starting.
243
00:09:28,340 --> 00:09:29,790
Good evening. I'm robert busby,
244
00:09:29,820 --> 00:09:31,770
And we're kicking off
ardenville's christmas fest
245
00:09:31,810 --> 00:09:33,780
With our hometown funny lady,
246
00:09:33,810 --> 00:09:35,780
Bella deldomino,
the star and owner
247
00:09:35,810 --> 00:09:37,050
Of the legendary comedy club.
248
00:09:37,130 --> 00:09:39,480
You know, it's
a christmas is a special
249
00:09:39,560 --> 00:09:41,700
Time of the year
for us at the comedy club.
250
00:09:41,740 --> 00:09:44,720
We are laughing all the way,
and we truly believe
251
00:09:44,750 --> 00:09:48,760
Celebrating can be made so much
better with a two-drink minimum.
252
00:09:48,830 --> 00:09:51,660
Remember when I used to
interview you in our treehouse,
253
00:09:51,740 --> 00:09:54,760
Back when you were going to be
the world's biggest movie star?
254
00:09:54,840 --> 00:09:57,970
Well, mom said, "acting
is a hard knock life.
255
00:09:58,080 --> 00:09:59,730
"everybody wants
to be in the movies.
256
00:09:59,770 --> 00:10:01,470
"get a real job, kid."
so, I did.
257
00:10:01,500 --> 00:10:03,820
My real job is a joke-writer
258
00:10:03,860 --> 00:10:05,770
For a woman who texts
with her pointer finger.
259
00:10:05,850 --> 00:10:07,610
Oh, don't sell yourself short.
260
00:10:07,690 --> 00:10:09,480
You're also
her personal assistant.
261
00:10:09,510 --> 00:10:11,010
Thanks.
262
00:10:11,090 --> 00:10:12,650
So, I couldn't help but notice
263
00:10:12,680 --> 00:10:14,980
You've decorated every inch of
the club in string lights,
264
00:10:15,020 --> 00:10:18,370
While your own home
looks like a troll cave.
265
00:10:18,450 --> 00:10:20,140
Okay, well,
the comedy club is my home,
266
00:10:20,220 --> 00:10:24,280
And, well, being on the road
with the comedienne herself,
267
00:10:24,430 --> 00:10:27,610
Oh, perfect.
Then, I can have your apartment.
268
00:10:27,690 --> 00:10:29,280
Consider it your
christmas gift to me.
269
00:10:29,430 --> 00:10:30,730
Actually,
if I remember correctly,
270
00:10:30,810 --> 00:10:32,530
My christmas present was getting
you this job.
271
00:10:32,570 --> 00:10:34,290
And you should pay attention
272
00:10:34,300 --> 00:10:35,820
Because you could
learn a lot from bella.
273
00:10:35,900 --> 00:10:37,450
I'm learning
a lot more from you.
274
00:10:37,520 --> 00:10:41,360
Now, she might be the face,
but you're the talent.
275
00:10:41,390 --> 00:10:44,550
No, I can't do what bella does.
276
00:10:44,620 --> 00:10:47,580
- I'm way too shy for that now.
- You can handle it.
277
00:10:47,660 --> 00:10:49,870
No. The comedy club
has a legacy.
278
00:10:49,900 --> 00:10:51,890
Okay, bella saved it
from a bulldozer.
279
00:10:51,960 --> 00:10:53,900
Do you know how many legends
have performed there?
280
00:10:53,970 --> 00:10:58,240
It's launched, I don't know,
a thousand careers,
281
00:10:58,320 --> 00:11:01,080
And that woman, she did that.
282
00:11:01,160 --> 00:11:02,800
And I saw this as an opportunity
283
00:11:02,830 --> 00:11:04,220
To dance and sing
284
00:11:04,300 --> 00:11:07,910
And say jokes that
I'd learned off the tv.
285
00:11:07,910 --> 00:11:09,310
What about your career?
286
00:11:09,390 --> 00:11:12,430
Haven't you ever considered
getting out on that stage?
287
00:11:12,510 --> 00:11:16,280
I love writing, I do, and
bella promised to introduce me
288
00:11:16,350 --> 00:11:18,490
To some of her
literary agent friends.
289
00:11:18,570 --> 00:11:20,080
So, I will get
to a writer's room.
290
00:11:20,230 --> 00:11:22,840
There's a ladder to climb.
291
00:11:22,840 --> 00:11:24,350
It's been five years.
292
00:11:24,430 --> 00:11:26,160
Maybe start
looking for an elevator?
293
00:11:26,240 --> 00:11:28,490
Robert: Tell us, what's your
favorite christmas memory?
294
00:11:28,490 --> 00:11:30,390
Well, oddly enough, robert,
295
00:11:30,430 --> 00:11:32,440
It's also the beginning
of my comedy career.
296
00:11:32,520 --> 00:11:34,840
I still remember to this day,
297
00:11:34,920 --> 00:11:37,580
Just like it was yesterday,
when I got my first laugh.
298
00:11:37,620 --> 00:11:39,250
It was my mother.
299
00:11:39,290 --> 00:11:40,680
Of course, it would
have been a whole lot better
300
00:11:40,790 --> 00:11:42,090
If it hadn't been mom.
301
00:11:42,170 --> 00:11:44,660
At least she gave
your story a happy ending.
302
00:11:44,690 --> 00:11:46,430
I did that.
303
00:11:46,510 --> 00:11:49,450
Yeah. One of the perks of
being a writer is that
304
00:11:49,450 --> 00:11:53,130
You never need therapy if you
can just change the ending.
305
00:11:53,130 --> 00:11:55,620
Now, we're happy to hear that
the comedy club is partnering
306
00:11:55,630 --> 00:11:58,250
With oma wenders to not only
sponsor ardenville's
307
00:11:58,290 --> 00:12:00,760
Christmas fest, but to bring
back the variety show.
308
00:12:00,790 --> 00:12:02,460
It's been a while since
the comedy club hosted.
309
00:12:02,530 --> 00:12:03,880
Bella: Yes, it has.
310
00:12:03,910 --> 00:12:06,110
Robert:
Eight years since you've hosted.
311
00:12:06,150 --> 00:12:08,720
She's looking at me,
isn't she?
312
00:12:08,720 --> 00:12:09,800
Yes, yes. Yes, it has.
313
00:12:09,950 --> 00:12:12,520
Who will be performing
at the big show?
314
00:12:13,440 --> 00:12:15,480
Um, well...
315
00:12:15,560 --> 00:12:18,550
Christmas is
full of surprises, isn't it?
316
00:12:18,630 --> 00:12:21,060
So, I don't want to
say too much too soon.
317
00:12:21,090 --> 00:12:22,890
(chuckling) very true.
318
00:12:22,960 --> 00:12:24,810
Well, christmas is
still three weeks away,
319
00:12:24,890 --> 00:12:26,910
So we're going to be following
up with you. But until then,
320
00:12:26,910 --> 00:12:29,830
We hope to see you at all the
holiday events around town.
321
00:12:29,910 --> 00:12:30,950
Oh, I hope so, too.
322
00:12:30,990 --> 00:12:32,790
Was that good for you?
323
00:12:32,820 --> 00:12:34,510
You didn't tell her
about the variety show.
324
00:12:34,580 --> 00:12:35,600
Nope.
325
00:12:35,680 --> 00:12:37,140
And you thought
that was a good idea?
326
00:12:37,180 --> 00:12:40,040
At the time, yes.
Not so much anymore, no.
327
00:12:45,610 --> 00:12:48,900
The comedy club is
sponsoring the christmas fest
328
00:12:48,940 --> 00:12:50,600
And the christmas variety show?
329
00:12:50,600 --> 00:12:53,930
You know why we had to nix
that years ago, don't you?
330
00:12:53,940 --> 00:12:57,440
Because nobody wants to leave
their house on christmas eve,
331
00:12:57,440 --> 00:13:00,190
And we would have to
sell out the entire show
332
00:13:00,190 --> 00:13:01,930
Just to break even.
333
00:13:02,010 --> 00:13:03,340
Yeah, but the show,
334
00:13:03,420 --> 00:13:05,370
The show was legendary;
it launched so many careers.
335
00:13:05,450 --> 00:13:08,530
And all those network
execs and studio heads,
336
00:13:08,530 --> 00:13:11,040
I mean, they all used to
celebrate christmas at the club.
337
00:13:11,120 --> 00:13:12,830
That was back in
the day of covered wagons,
338
00:13:12,860 --> 00:13:15,550
When there were only
three tv networks.
339
00:13:15,620 --> 00:13:17,670
Well, you finally agreed to
sponsor the christmas fest,
340
00:13:17,700 --> 00:13:21,670
I just-- I assumed that the
variety show was part of it.
341
00:13:21,700 --> 00:13:24,310
The city is so excited, bella.
342
00:13:24,340 --> 00:13:25,990
This is a christmas tragedy.
343
00:13:26,140 --> 00:13:28,010
I don't have to go
to any of those events,
344
00:13:28,040 --> 00:13:30,680
Just because I'm
sponsoring them, do I?
345
00:13:30,710 --> 00:13:33,880
Well, you are a
beloved local celebrity.
346
00:13:33,960 --> 00:13:36,720
- I'm sure you're gonna have--
- local, aubri?
347
00:13:36,790 --> 00:13:39,500
I think I have a little more
range than local, aubri.
348
00:13:39,570 --> 00:13:40,660
Of course.
349
00:13:40,740 --> 00:13:42,660
So, just cancel it.
350
00:13:42,690 --> 00:13:45,210
Bella, the comedy club has to
show up to some key event,
351
00:13:45,290 --> 00:13:46,990
And we also have to donate
352
00:13:47,070 --> 00:13:49,900
The proceeds of the
variety show to a charity.
353
00:13:49,900 --> 00:13:52,420
- What charity?
- Children's hospital.
354
00:13:52,450 --> 00:13:56,650
The one charity
I can't back out of.
355
00:13:56,720 --> 00:13:59,920
Okay, we can invite
industry bigwigs.
356
00:13:59,990 --> 00:14:03,340
Maybe even your
agent literary friends,
357
00:14:03,420 --> 00:14:06,100
You know, the ones that you
promised to introduce me to.
358
00:14:06,170 --> 00:14:07,920
It'll be great.
359
00:14:07,930 --> 00:14:09,760
The variety show almost
destroyed my career
360
00:14:09,840 --> 00:14:11,720
And brought
the comedy club down.
361
00:14:11,720 --> 00:14:13,100
What happened?
362
00:14:13,210 --> 00:14:14,270
I remember the first christmas,
363
00:14:14,350 --> 00:14:17,240
I was so excited
to be part of it,
364
00:14:17,240 --> 00:14:21,690
But I had no idea then how
difficult it was to sell out
365
00:14:21,690 --> 00:14:23,440
A show on christmas eve.
366
00:14:23,440 --> 00:14:25,170
Yeah, but we can send out
industry invitations today.
367
00:14:25,250 --> 00:14:27,750
We can publicize it
on our social media.
368
00:14:27,790 --> 00:14:31,260
We can tell everybody
and it's gonna be great.
369
00:14:31,290 --> 00:14:34,630
Industry big wigs do not laugh.
370
00:14:34,700 --> 00:14:37,280
And the few local
people who showed up,
371
00:14:37,360 --> 00:14:38,940
They couldn't carry the show.
372
00:14:39,020 --> 00:14:41,540
There wasn't enough of them.
373
00:14:41,540 --> 00:14:43,180
Oh, I totally bombed.
374
00:14:43,290 --> 00:14:45,360
I can't tell
you how many gigs I missed
375
00:14:45,440 --> 00:14:48,420
Because of that
christmas variety concert,
376
00:14:48,460 --> 00:14:52,060
And I've been trying to crawl my
way back ever since.
377
00:14:52,140 --> 00:14:55,450
Yeah, you're right.
378
00:14:55,480 --> 00:14:58,390
This is on me and I will fix it.
379
00:14:58,390 --> 00:15:00,270
- I'll think of something.
- Good.
380
00:15:00,270 --> 00:15:02,900
- Chop, chop.
- Yeah.
381
00:15:04,670 --> 00:15:06,960
(sighing)
382
00:15:06,990 --> 00:15:08,730
(groaning)
383
00:15:08,740 --> 00:15:09,980
They published another list
384
00:15:10,050 --> 00:15:11,740
Of all the young actresses
you've dated?
385
00:15:11,740 --> 00:15:13,310
Do you know how often
I have to convince people
386
00:15:13,390 --> 00:15:14,970
That my brother's not a creep?
387
00:15:15,000 --> 00:15:17,740
Are the influencers on that list
too or just the actresses.
388
00:15:17,750 --> 00:15:21,820
Look, I've never even met half
the women on this list, okay?
389
00:15:21,900 --> 00:15:23,510
Except for margot.
390
00:15:23,540 --> 00:15:28,070
I'm kidding. I have moved on
from all that.
391
00:15:28,180 --> 00:15:30,250
Okay? Enough professional
faceplants
392
00:15:30,320 --> 00:15:32,550
And your priorities
start to change.
393
00:15:32,590 --> 00:15:34,140
Yeah, well,
your career will bounce back.
394
00:15:34,170 --> 00:15:35,500
Don't be so hard
on yourself.
395
00:15:35,580 --> 00:15:39,260
Those movies were pretentious,
exploitative,
396
00:15:39,270 --> 00:15:40,310
Never-ending.
397
00:15:40,310 --> 00:15:42,340
- Oh!
- But don't get me wrong,
398
00:15:42,420 --> 00:15:43,860
You really great in them.
399
00:15:43,940 --> 00:15:47,070
Oh, thank you.
That's really sweet of you.
400
00:15:50,540 --> 00:15:55,290
And two eggnogs
and two cinnamon rolls, please.
401
00:15:55,370 --> 00:15:56,740
Thank you so much.
402
00:15:56,780 --> 00:15:59,280
I gotta go. Text me when
you're done shopping.
403
00:15:59,310 --> 00:16:00,370
Yeah.
404
00:16:09,530 --> 00:16:10,840
(sighing contentedly)
405
00:16:10,870 --> 00:16:13,040
- Good morning.
- Morning.
406
00:16:13,080 --> 00:16:14,460
I saw you while I was in line
407
00:16:14,540 --> 00:16:16,610
And thought you might
need some eggnog.
408
00:16:16,650 --> 00:16:18,530
Don't worry; it's not alcoholic.
409
00:16:18,560 --> 00:16:19,960
Although, I did see a few people
410
00:16:20,030 --> 00:16:21,880
Throw caution to the wind
at 9 a.M. On a Tuesday.
411
00:16:21,960 --> 00:16:23,370
No, thank you.
412
00:16:23,400 --> 00:16:25,400
I've already had my cup of
heavy cream this morning.
413
00:16:25,480 --> 00:16:27,880
Were you always this prickly
or did bella drain
414
00:16:27,960 --> 00:16:29,650
All the christmas
spirit from you?
415
00:16:29,650 --> 00:16:31,710
Okay, now, you've put me in a
position where I'm some grinch,
416
00:16:31,740 --> 00:16:33,030
Just because
I don't want your eggnog.
417
00:16:33,060 --> 00:16:36,030
As her heart shrunk
two full sizes.
418
00:16:37,220 --> 00:16:39,620
For christmas.
And so, you'll leave me alone.
419
00:16:44,250 --> 00:16:46,000
What's in there?
420
00:16:46,000 --> 00:16:49,080
Oh, nothing. Just...
421
00:16:49,110 --> 00:16:52,500
Thoughts, ideas, jokes.
422
00:16:52,510 --> 00:16:54,820
You're a comic?
You seem so well-adjusted.
423
00:16:54,900 --> 00:16:56,250
A writer for bella.
424
00:16:56,330 --> 00:16:59,180
And you never wanted
to get on stage yourself?
425
00:16:59,180 --> 00:17:01,350
Once upon a time.
426
00:17:01,350 --> 00:17:02,510
And then, what happened?
427
00:17:02,520 --> 00:17:04,010
Someone threw
a tomato too hard once?
428
00:17:04,040 --> 00:17:06,020
My words are much better
coming out of bella's mouth.
429
00:17:06,020 --> 00:17:08,250
Well, as someone
who has spent years
430
00:17:08,280 --> 00:17:09,560
Saying someone else's words,
431
00:17:09,600 --> 00:17:11,900
I am thrilled to
speak for myself again.
432
00:17:11,930 --> 00:17:14,620
You don't enjoy movies.
433
00:17:14,700 --> 00:17:15,920
Bella would kill
for your career.
434
00:17:15,960 --> 00:17:17,410
She would commit battery
for a callback.
435
00:17:17,440 --> 00:17:20,550
The money's okay,
but what I'm really in it for
436
00:17:20,630 --> 00:17:22,680
Is the constant
public scrutiny.
437
00:17:22,760 --> 00:17:24,190
That's why I love
a comedy club.
438
00:17:24,260 --> 00:17:26,080
The scrutiny is
much more intimate.
439
00:17:26,120 --> 00:17:28,520
Yeah, well, forgive me
if I don't shed a tear
440
00:17:28,600 --> 00:17:31,840
For the successful actor
up for an action-hero film.
441
00:17:33,110 --> 00:17:34,780
If you tell me
what's in your notebook,
442
00:17:34,860 --> 00:17:38,530
I'll try to forgive you.
443
00:17:38,610 --> 00:17:41,120
Well, the tree lighting
ceremony is tonight.
444
00:17:41,200 --> 00:17:44,320
There are christmas jokes, just
to kick off the festivities.
445
00:17:44,330 --> 00:17:48,330
Oh, great! This is great!
Let's-- let's hear one.
446
00:17:48,400 --> 00:17:49,710
No!
447
00:17:49,790 --> 00:17:50,820
Yes!
448
00:17:50,900 --> 00:17:52,360
No, you're--
you're mike baxter.
449
00:17:52,360 --> 00:17:54,130
I could never read them to you.
450
00:17:54,160 --> 00:17:57,070
Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
451
00:17:57,070 --> 00:17:59,000
Don't think of me
as mike baxter, the comic.
452
00:17:59,000 --> 00:18:01,470
Think of me as the guy
who's sitting next to you
453
00:18:01,500 --> 00:18:03,790
And desperately loves jokes.
454
00:18:04,690 --> 00:18:05,950
Very persuasive.
455
00:18:05,990 --> 00:18:07,580
Okay.
456
00:18:07,580 --> 00:18:09,490
I have this bit
about how my mother
457
00:18:09,570 --> 00:18:11,490
Is impossible to
buy presents for.
458
00:18:11,570 --> 00:18:14,510
So, this year, I actually asked
her to tell me what she wants.
459
00:18:14,550 --> 00:18:16,110
And then, what she wants,
I can't seem to find anywhere.
460
00:18:16,180 --> 00:18:19,500
And well, the punchline is
461
00:18:19,500 --> 00:18:21,150
That what she
wants most is for me
462
00:18:21,190 --> 00:18:23,080
To find better health insurance.
463
00:18:23,160 --> 00:18:25,750
- That's good.
- Yeah?
464
00:18:25,830 --> 00:18:28,830
That's good.
What if you somehow got hurt
465
00:18:28,860 --> 00:18:31,030
While you're searching for it?
466
00:18:31,110 --> 00:18:33,060
- Like sprained my ankle.
- Yeah.
467
00:18:33,100 --> 00:18:34,520
At least you think you did.
468
00:18:34,670 --> 00:18:36,520
You're too worried to go
to the doctor to find out.
469
00:18:36,590 --> 00:18:37,820
Are you sure
470
00:18:37,850 --> 00:18:39,170
You want to be an action hero
471
00:18:39,210 --> 00:18:40,870
Because comedy
suits you pretty well.
472
00:18:40,950 --> 00:18:43,620
Well, the rooster man is funny.
473
00:18:43,620 --> 00:18:45,210
- He's funny.
- The rooster man...
474
00:18:45,290 --> 00:18:47,750
See? You've just heard the name
and you're already laughing.
475
00:18:51,800 --> 00:18:53,480
Oh!
Oh, it's bella. I better go.
476
00:18:53,560 --> 00:18:55,700
Mike: Right now?
What? Is the club on fire?
477
00:18:55,780 --> 00:18:57,950
Uh, no.
The comedy club's closed.
478
00:18:58,020 --> 00:19:01,710
That right there is the
star of the town tonight.
479
00:19:01,790 --> 00:19:03,410
Oh, this is why
I love christmas;
480
00:19:03,490 --> 00:19:05,700
People coming together just to
watch a switch get flipped.
481
00:19:05,730 --> 00:19:06,880
Yeah, it's beautiful.
482
00:19:07,030 --> 00:19:08,810
I'll be there, front row.
483
00:19:08,810 --> 00:19:10,790
Back row? What?
484
00:19:10,870 --> 00:19:14,300
Uh, I just-- I don't want
bella to get upstaged.
485
00:19:14,370 --> 00:19:16,770
I will be incognito,
I promise.
486
00:19:16,810 --> 00:19:18,380
- Like the rooster man.
- Hmm.
487
00:19:18,410 --> 00:19:20,080
I don't actually
know what his deal is.
488
00:19:20,150 --> 00:19:24,160
Is he the one with the laser
thingies or is he invisible?
489
00:19:24,160 --> 00:19:25,420
Well, he's a rooster.
490
00:19:25,490 --> 00:19:27,030
So, he has razor-sharp talons
491
00:19:27,070 --> 00:19:28,900
And he can more, like,
glide short distances.
492
00:19:28,980 --> 00:19:30,900
Don't forget, he's funny.
493
00:19:30,970 --> 00:19:32,620
He is a grown man
with talons, so...
494
00:19:32,660 --> 00:19:33,820
Aubri: Hilarious.
495
00:19:33,890 --> 00:19:35,710
Oh, you forgot your, uh...
496
00:19:35,710 --> 00:19:37,100
Eggnog.
497
00:19:37,180 --> 00:19:39,600
I'll see you tonight.
498
00:19:39,670 --> 00:19:42,010
Hey, maybe you will,
maybe you won't.
499
00:19:44,570 --> 00:19:47,000
Good news:
500
00:19:47,080 --> 00:19:50,240
We just secured an improv group
for the talent show.
501
00:19:50,280 --> 00:19:51,630
Amazing.
Second city?
502
00:19:51,700 --> 00:19:53,940
Cook county technical institute.
503
00:19:53,940 --> 00:19:56,330
But the good news is they said
they'd work for drinks.
504
00:19:56,370 --> 00:19:58,350
That puts us at four acts only,
505
00:19:58,430 --> 00:20:00,340
And we still need a headliner.
506
00:20:00,420 --> 00:20:02,200
Bella, right?
507
00:20:02,280 --> 00:20:04,360
No, she said she would rather
apologize to second husband
508
00:20:04,390 --> 00:20:06,030
Than go up during
the variety show.
509
00:20:06,030 --> 00:20:07,440
What about mike baxter?
510
00:20:07,520 --> 00:20:10,020
Ian, he's an award-nominated
actor.
511
00:20:10,100 --> 00:20:12,810
I mean, there were golden
universe awards or whatever,
512
00:20:12,890 --> 00:20:15,400
But no, he's not doing our show.
513
00:20:15,480 --> 00:20:16,780
Okay, I want you guys
to tell me the truth.
514
00:20:16,850 --> 00:20:20,900
Is this too "santa baby"?
515
00:20:20,980 --> 00:20:22,810
Eartha kitt wishes.
516
00:20:22,880 --> 00:20:24,690
Oh...
Aubri, who's your friend?
517
00:20:24,690 --> 00:20:27,180
This is ian, my cousin.
518
00:20:27,210 --> 00:20:28,700
You hired him
a month ago.
519
00:20:28,730 --> 00:20:32,930
Oh, and I would hire him
again in a heartbeat.
520
00:20:32,940 --> 00:20:35,820
You look ravishing,
as always.
521
00:20:35,900 --> 00:20:38,440
But I think that outfit might be
a bit too much for tonight.
522
00:20:38,470 --> 00:20:41,070
It's pretty cold outside.
It's going to be freezing.
523
00:20:41,070 --> 00:20:42,230
What are you talking about?
524
00:20:42,300 --> 00:20:45,090
The gala is at
the police museum.
525
00:20:45,160 --> 00:20:46,220
No, no, no. No.
526
00:20:46,300 --> 00:20:48,890
You are intro-ing
the tree lighting tonight.
527
00:20:48,970 --> 00:20:50,580
I sent you
the jokes yesterday.
528
00:20:50,580 --> 00:20:53,300
I thought that was just banter
for the italian beef hour
529
00:20:53,340 --> 00:20:54,750
At the gala.
530
00:20:54,750 --> 00:20:56,580
Besides, it's not like
I didn't tell you.
531
00:20:56,580 --> 00:21:01,090
The christmas fest is
a really big deal, bella.
532
00:21:01,090 --> 00:21:04,230
If you saw the names of the
people on that list, aubri,
533
00:21:04,270 --> 00:21:06,000
You wouldn't be
making such a fuss.
534
00:21:06,080 --> 00:21:08,790
It's just a lot of people are
relying on you to be there.
535
00:21:08,860 --> 00:21:11,350
And I'm relying on myself
to start networking.
536
00:21:11,420 --> 00:21:14,100
I mean, why aren't I
in those superhero movies?
537
00:21:14,100 --> 00:21:18,660
What do you think?
I can't play a chicken or a--
538
00:21:18,700 --> 00:21:21,480
Or a sultry supervillain
bent on revenge?
539
00:21:21,520 --> 00:21:25,040
Oh, aubri,
how much are we paying
540
00:21:25,110 --> 00:21:27,100
This delightful young man?
541
00:21:27,180 --> 00:21:28,360
Very little.
542
00:21:28,370 --> 00:21:29,520
- Yeah.
- (phone ringing)
543
00:21:29,680 --> 00:21:30,960
Oh, it's my manager.
544
00:21:31,030 --> 00:21:33,190
Okay, fix that tree thing.
545
00:21:33,260 --> 00:21:35,350
Remember, I believe in you.
546
00:21:35,460 --> 00:21:38,380
And you stay right
where you are.
547
00:21:38,460 --> 00:21:40,000
Hello.
548
00:21:40,000 --> 00:21:42,210
- Thanks for encouraging her.
- Hey!
549
00:21:48,040 --> 00:21:51,530
It's a bummer nobody will
hear your jokes tonight.
550
00:21:51,560 --> 00:21:54,880
Oh, well, I'll have plenty more
opportunities before christmas.
551
00:21:54,960 --> 00:21:57,380
Why doesn't belle
invite you to her party,
552
00:21:57,460 --> 00:21:59,320
So you can meet
all her agent friends?
553
00:21:59,400 --> 00:22:02,260
Oh, she says bringing her
assistant as her plus one
554
00:22:02,330 --> 00:22:04,070
Will make it seem like
she can't get a date.
555
00:22:04,080 --> 00:22:07,900
I just met her and she seems
incredible, but seems like
556
00:22:07,900 --> 00:22:09,640
She dangles a carrot to
keep you behind the scenes.
557
00:22:09,720 --> 00:22:11,750
No, she supports my career.
558
00:22:11,830 --> 00:22:14,040
Because it supports hers.
559
00:22:14,070 --> 00:22:15,590
Next year will be different.
560
00:22:15,660 --> 00:22:17,150
She knows how much
this means to me.
561
00:22:17,220 --> 00:22:20,170
And it's not like
I don't enjoy my job.
562
00:22:20,170 --> 00:22:21,540
You're talented, cuz.
563
00:22:21,580 --> 00:22:23,090
I just want to see
you hit it big time
564
00:22:23,170 --> 00:22:25,400
And not be a
ghostwriter forever.
565
00:22:25,430 --> 00:22:26,880
Thank you.
566
00:22:26,920 --> 00:22:29,340
What's the deal with bella?
567
00:22:30,740 --> 00:22:32,330
Oh, uh, she sent her apologies,
568
00:22:32,410 --> 00:22:34,500
But her dog was sick,
and then got better,
569
00:22:34,570 --> 00:22:37,520
And then got adopted,
so she had to deal with that.
570
00:22:37,520 --> 00:22:40,240
But it all--
it all ended up working out.
571
00:22:40,250 --> 00:22:42,080
I told brittany at
city hall this afternoon.
572
00:22:42,080 --> 00:22:44,230
Well, she must have forgotten to
tell me because, in ten minutes,
573
00:22:44,230 --> 00:22:45,600
I'm emceeing this thing
574
00:22:45,680 --> 00:22:47,270
And I haven't even
started my vocal warm-ups.
575
00:22:47,340 --> 00:22:49,270
I'm sure your elocution
will be spot on.
576
00:22:49,350 --> 00:22:50,770
I'm sorry, I shouldn't have...
577
00:22:50,850 --> 00:22:53,520
Well, obviously,
we need someone to perform,
578
00:22:53,590 --> 00:22:55,080
And that's gonna be you.
579
00:22:55,110 --> 00:22:56,350
Me?
580
00:22:56,430 --> 00:22:57,610
No. No, no, no, no, no.
581
00:22:57,690 --> 00:22:59,800
I'm a nobody. No.
582
00:22:59,870 --> 00:23:01,360
Well, that's what I told them,
but my hands are tied.
583
00:23:01,430 --> 00:23:04,130
They're your jokes.
Do it for christmas.
584
00:23:04,210 --> 00:23:06,470
No, they won't be the same.
I don't have bella's delivery.
585
00:23:06,550 --> 00:23:09,640
I... I haven't done my
vocal warm-ups either, so...
586
00:23:09,720 --> 00:23:11,030
You can do it.
587
00:23:11,110 --> 00:23:13,310
Yeah, well, whether you can
or can't, it's happening.
588
00:23:13,390 --> 00:23:15,110
You're on in two minutes.
589
00:23:15,150 --> 00:23:16,510
Two minutes.
590
00:23:16,520 --> 00:23:20,210
Both:
I think I'm gonna throw up.
591
00:23:20,290 --> 00:23:22,490
I'll go do sound check.
You got this.
592
00:23:22,490 --> 00:23:23,690
Yeah. Okay.
593
00:23:23,690 --> 00:23:25,980
Ooh... Okay.
Yeah, so, I'm gonna do it.
594
00:23:28,070 --> 00:23:30,050
Psst. Hey, it's mike.
595
00:23:30,130 --> 00:23:31,450
Yeah, I know.
596
00:23:31,480 --> 00:23:33,660
Mike baxter.
597
00:23:33,670 --> 00:23:35,630
Do I not look incognito?
598
00:23:35,670 --> 00:23:38,910
No, you look like mike baxter
but in sunglasses.
599
00:23:40,170 --> 00:23:41,620
Where's bella?
Isn't she about to go on?
600
00:23:41,660 --> 00:23:43,660
I'm filling in.
It's a whole thing.
601
00:23:43,730 --> 00:23:45,680
- Great!
- No! No, no.
602
00:23:45,750 --> 00:23:48,460
It's not great.
Nobody knows who I am.
603
00:23:49,470 --> 00:23:51,910
Now, nobody knows who you are.
604
00:23:52,020 --> 00:23:55,260
Now, I'm just the same nobody
but in sunglasses.
605
00:23:55,260 --> 00:23:57,990
Look, you're gonna be--
you're gonna be great. Okay?
606
00:23:58,020 --> 00:24:00,860
Just go out there
and have some fun with it.
607
00:24:00,930 --> 00:24:02,480
They'll know you the next time.
608
00:24:02,510 --> 00:24:04,520
Robert:
Please welcome to the stage...
609
00:24:04,520 --> 00:24:06,090
- Oh, no.
- Okay, no, no, no.
610
00:24:06,170 --> 00:24:08,190
You're not going anywhere.
You got this.
611
00:24:08,270 --> 00:24:10,000
- Okay.
- Okay, you got this.
612
00:24:10,040 --> 00:24:13,500
...From our beloved comedy club,
aubri wilson.
613
00:24:13,540 --> 00:24:16,340
(cheering, applauding)
614
00:24:16,380 --> 00:24:18,840
Good luck up here.
They wouldn't give me an inch.
615
00:24:18,880 --> 00:24:21,180
- Okay.
- That's my time.
616
00:24:21,210 --> 00:24:22,880
(audience applauding)
617
00:24:22,880 --> 00:24:24,830
Hello.
Merry christmas, everybody.
618
00:24:24,870 --> 00:24:26,380
(microphone feedback screeching)
619
00:24:26,460 --> 00:24:29,340
Oh, I forgot to move
this out of the way.
620
00:24:31,210 --> 00:24:34,180
- Ardenville, merry christmas.
- Audience: Merry christmas.
621
00:24:34,210 --> 00:24:35,540
As robert said, I do,
622
00:24:35,620 --> 00:24:37,850
In fact, work for
the historic comedy club.
623
00:24:37,880 --> 00:24:40,210
You all look a little confused,
and you know what?
624
00:24:40,290 --> 00:24:42,310
I am just as
confused as you are.
625
00:24:42,310 --> 00:24:43,380
Yeah, the more observant
626
00:24:43,460 --> 00:24:44,850
In the audience
may have noticed,
627
00:24:44,890 --> 00:24:47,190
I am not, in fact,
bella deldomino.
628
00:24:47,220 --> 00:24:49,020
Was it my bouncy,
629
00:24:49,060 --> 00:24:50,390
Radiant skin that gave it away?
630
00:24:50,470 --> 00:24:53,490
- Woman: What?
- No?
631
00:24:53,490 --> 00:24:56,730
Uh, well, can we give it up
for the comedy club?
632
00:24:56,810 --> 00:24:58,200
- (audience cheering)
- yeah!
633
00:24:58,230 --> 00:25:01,570
Yeah, yeah, I've been
there for about five years,
634
00:25:01,650 --> 00:25:03,810
Performing duties as,
to quote my business cards,
635
00:25:03,890 --> 00:25:06,420
"crypt keeper".
636
00:25:06,500 --> 00:25:10,260
Our hallowed halls are lined
with photographs of famous,
637
00:25:10,340 --> 00:25:13,820
Legendary comedians who have
graced our stage over the years.
638
00:25:13,900 --> 00:25:15,580
They are icons,
639
00:25:15,660 --> 00:25:17,930
The real who's who of hollywood,
640
00:25:18,010 --> 00:25:21,350
As in, "uh, who's that again?"
641
00:25:22,260 --> 00:25:24,520
Um... Well,
642
00:25:24,520 --> 00:25:27,240
Does anybody have
someone in their life
643
00:25:27,250 --> 00:25:29,280
That is just impossible
to buy presents for?
644
00:25:29,360 --> 00:25:32,250
- Audience: Bella! Bella! Bella!
- Uh, anyone?
645
00:25:32,280 --> 00:25:35,940
Audience: Bella! Bella! Bella!
646
00:25:36,010 --> 00:25:37,950
See, my mother,
647
00:25:38,030 --> 00:25:41,580
She's is one of those people.
Oh, I love my mother, but--
648
00:25:41,610 --> 00:25:44,850
Audience: Bella! Bella! Bella!
649
00:25:44,880 --> 00:25:46,620
Oh!
650
00:25:46,620 --> 00:25:48,030
Uh, mike baxter,
what are you doing here?
651
00:25:48,110 --> 00:25:50,770
(audience cheering)
652
00:25:50,800 --> 00:25:52,030
Mike baxter!
653
00:25:52,100 --> 00:25:54,100
Hi there.
I was just enjoying your set,
654
00:25:54,140 --> 00:25:56,760
And it suddenly occurred to me
655
00:25:56,790 --> 00:25:58,310
That I'm pretty sure my picture
656
00:25:58,390 --> 00:26:00,110
Is hanging on
the walls of the comedy club.
657
00:26:00,150 --> 00:26:01,430
No, no, no, no, no.
Oh, allow me to clarify.
658
00:26:01,460 --> 00:26:02,980
Yes, please, please clarify.
659
00:26:03,060 --> 00:26:05,450
My earlier joke bore no
relevance to the defendant.
660
00:26:05,480 --> 00:26:07,060
No, no, no! Not a defendant.
661
00:26:07,060 --> 00:26:08,640
- No, no. No.
- A different word.
662
00:26:08,710 --> 00:26:09,940
The all-around innocent...
663
00:26:09,970 --> 00:26:11,550
Innocent!
We like that much better.
664
00:26:11,620 --> 00:26:12,770
Michael...
665
00:26:12,880 --> 00:26:14,160
Both: Baxter!
666
00:26:14,230 --> 00:26:17,460
(audience cheering)
667
00:26:17,500 --> 00:26:19,500
You can get off my stage now.
668
00:26:19,570 --> 00:26:22,320
(audience cheering)
669
00:26:22,390 --> 00:26:25,560
And don't forget, tickets are
on sale for the variety show
670
00:26:25,640 --> 00:26:27,580
Christmas eve
at the comedy club.
671
00:26:27,580 --> 00:26:31,310
(audience cheering)
672
00:26:31,420 --> 00:26:33,180
You really saved me up there.
673
00:26:33,250 --> 00:26:34,680
Oh, come on. It's just tough
to deal with hecklers.
674
00:26:34,760 --> 00:26:36,130
But that was great.
That was fun, right?
675
00:26:36,170 --> 00:26:38,320
- Aubri: It was fun.
- Ian: That was incredible.
676
00:26:38,350 --> 00:26:41,320
I was so scared you were going
to bomb, I almost passed out.
677
00:26:41,350 --> 00:26:44,220
Mike, this is ian,
my very supportive cousin,
678
00:26:44,220 --> 00:26:46,260
Who always believes in me.
679
00:26:46,270 --> 00:26:48,020
I'm such a big fan,
680
00:26:48,100 --> 00:26:49,600
Especially of your recent work.
681
00:26:49,600 --> 00:26:50,690
Oh.
682
00:26:50,770 --> 00:26:52,270
That scene where
you forgave yourself
683
00:26:52,270 --> 00:26:55,850
For not forgiving your son
for never forgiving you,
684
00:26:55,930 --> 00:26:58,320
I felt that.
685
00:26:59,600 --> 00:27:02,280
Well, he's a liar,
but I like him.
686
00:27:02,280 --> 00:27:05,770
Oma wenders on the house,
sponsors of the event.
687
00:27:05,770 --> 00:27:08,550
And mr. Baxter, I'm really
hoping we see you and belle
688
00:27:08,620 --> 00:27:10,510
At some of our
other holiday events.
689
00:27:10,550 --> 00:27:12,290
Sure, count me in,
anything christmas.
690
00:27:12,290 --> 00:27:13,700
This is gonna be the best
691
00:27:13,780 --> 00:27:16,000
Christmas fest
ardenville has ever seen.
692
00:27:16,040 --> 00:27:17,500
It's time for the tree lighting!
693
00:27:17,540 --> 00:27:19,690
Oh, we're missing the--
the switch getting flipped.
694
00:27:19,730 --> 00:27:21,380
Okay!
695
00:27:21,410 --> 00:27:23,690
Audience: Ten, nine, eight...
696
00:27:23,730 --> 00:27:25,140
Mike: Come on, come on, come on!
697
00:27:25,140 --> 00:27:26,530
...Six, five,
698
00:27:26,570 --> 00:27:29,470
Four, three, two, one!
699
00:27:29,480 --> 00:27:33,440
(audience cheering)
700
00:27:39,650 --> 00:27:40,830
(coughing)
701
00:27:40,860 --> 00:27:43,030
Oh, my god!
What is this?
702
00:27:43,070 --> 00:27:44,580
Oma wenders.
703
00:27:44,660 --> 00:27:46,140
It'll get easier
the more you drink.
704
00:27:46,220 --> 00:27:47,870
Oh, spicy!
705
00:27:48,920 --> 00:27:52,120
Oh, it burns.
I like it now.
706
00:27:53,880 --> 00:27:55,840
Just take out those
two words there.
707
00:27:55,920 --> 00:27:58,750
Oh, I heard you
and mike were quite a hit
708
00:27:58,760 --> 00:28:01,480
At the christmas tree
lighting ceremony.
709
00:28:01,520 --> 00:28:04,600
You know, it's hard for me
to picture you on stage.
710
00:28:04,680 --> 00:28:07,180
It's really not in your
wheelhouse, is it?
711
00:28:07,180 --> 00:28:08,890
We had to promote
the variety show.
712
00:28:08,920 --> 00:28:11,260
Yeah, the ticket sales
haven't been great.
713
00:28:11,330 --> 00:28:14,930
You were lucky to have
some star power with you.
714
00:28:15,010 --> 00:28:16,400
How did it work?
715
00:28:16,430 --> 00:28:20,600
Well, we sold more tickets,
and acts are calling us now,
716
00:28:20,680 --> 00:28:22,450
Which means we can
finally hold auditions.
717
00:28:22,530 --> 00:28:25,100
No, I mean, how did it work,
your performance?
718
00:28:25,170 --> 00:28:29,030
You know, I mean, your
writing skills are stellar.
719
00:28:29,040 --> 00:28:31,690
But sometimes, stage work,
720
00:28:31,760 --> 00:28:34,930
It requires a more...
Commanding presence.
721
00:28:34,970 --> 00:28:38,970
Well, mike had enough
presence for the both of us.
722
00:28:39,050 --> 00:28:41,610
Oh, well, I'm happy
that it went well for you.
723
00:28:41,640 --> 00:28:43,260
But you know, it could
just be beginner's luck.
724
00:28:43,290 --> 00:28:46,560
So, you don't want to get
too overconfident about it.
725
00:28:46,640 --> 00:28:49,010
I mean, you're used to
seeing me kill on stage,
726
00:28:49,050 --> 00:28:52,540
So you might forget
how embarrassing it could be
727
00:28:52,620 --> 00:28:54,570
If the
whole thing fell flat.
728
00:28:54,640 --> 00:28:56,200
Well, you can dazzle audiences
729
00:28:56,240 --> 00:28:58,140
In the christmas village
walk-through.
730
00:28:58,220 --> 00:28:59,270
Ehh. No.
731
00:28:59,310 --> 00:29:01,780
Where's the drama?
732
00:29:02,740 --> 00:29:03,890
It's too pedestrian.
733
00:29:03,960 --> 00:29:05,330
No, you're not walking.
734
00:29:05,410 --> 00:29:07,220
You're interacting with
people as they walk through.
735
00:29:07,300 --> 00:29:08,620
And from what I'm told,
736
00:29:08,650 --> 00:29:11,650
You are playing a
significant christmas legend.
737
00:29:11,730 --> 00:29:14,650
Oh, that sounds more like it:
Bella deldomino,
738
00:29:14,730 --> 00:29:16,170
Christmas legend.
739
00:29:16,250 --> 00:29:17,730
There you go.
740
00:29:17,810 --> 00:29:19,330
You're going to
come with me, right?
741
00:29:19,400 --> 00:29:21,070
Because, I mean, in case
I need to change the script,
742
00:29:21,150 --> 00:29:23,130
I mean, I need you there.
743
00:29:23,170 --> 00:29:24,630
Of course, I will be
there, as always.
744
00:29:24,670 --> 00:29:26,590
But you are a guest
on a podcast next week,
745
00:29:26,590 --> 00:29:28,890
So let's focus
on that next, okay?
746
00:29:31,160 --> 00:29:34,580
♪ christmas liqueurs...
(muttering) ♪
747
00:29:34,660 --> 00:29:36,510
Writing away?
748
00:29:36,590 --> 00:29:38,190
Reminds me of
when you were a kid,
749
00:29:38,270 --> 00:29:39,360
Always lost in your notebook.
750
00:29:39,440 --> 00:29:41,030
Well, except
I'm not getting grounded
751
00:29:41,110 --> 00:29:42,350
For ignoring my homework.
752
00:29:42,430 --> 00:29:45,390
I haven't felt this
creative in a really long time.
753
00:29:45,460 --> 00:29:46,780
Well, I made you some mint tea
754
00:29:46,780 --> 00:29:48,520
For helping me bring
the girls to school.
755
00:29:48,600 --> 00:29:50,110
Oh, thank you.
756
00:29:50,120 --> 00:29:53,360
Wait, school? I could have
sworn you said "racetrack".
757
00:29:53,400 --> 00:29:55,880
I really appreciate you
758
00:29:55,960 --> 00:29:57,270
For letting me
crash at your place.
759
00:29:57,350 --> 00:29:58,550
We love having you.
760
00:29:58,630 --> 00:30:00,080
I mean, I wish you could have
761
00:30:00,090 --> 00:30:03,220
Stayed with us last year,
you and... Jessica.
762
00:30:03,300 --> 00:30:06,720
She's left me for
some football player,
763
00:30:06,800 --> 00:30:09,230
Then left him when his team
lost in the playoffs.
764
00:30:09,310 --> 00:30:11,350
I think she has
commitment issues.
765
00:30:11,380 --> 00:30:13,140
Hmm.
That's one way to put it.
766
00:30:13,140 --> 00:30:14,870
Well, she would
have never stayed.
767
00:30:14,900 --> 00:30:16,020
That bed is awful.
768
00:30:16,050 --> 00:30:18,460
You said you slept well.
769
00:30:18,540 --> 00:30:20,980
I did,
I said that, but I lied.
770
00:30:20,980 --> 00:30:24,900
But hanging with family is
worth the kink in my neck...
771
00:30:24,980 --> 00:30:26,970
And the nagging in my ear.
772
00:30:26,970 --> 00:30:29,330
Yeah, well, just think,
if you had a family of your own,
773
00:30:29,410 --> 00:30:31,380
You'd be able to experience this
kind of torture every day.
774
00:30:31,420 --> 00:30:33,550
I do want a family someday.
775
00:30:33,660 --> 00:30:35,900
It just hasn't been right.
776
00:30:35,900 --> 00:30:37,790
- I have time.
- Mm-hmm.
777
00:30:39,740 --> 00:30:41,250
Sorry.
778
00:30:41,330 --> 00:30:42,760
- One sec.
- Mm-hmm.
779
00:30:42,840 --> 00:30:44,150
Hey, damon.
780
00:30:44,230 --> 00:30:47,050
Damon: Is he on or isn't he?
Brandon, is he on?
781
00:30:47,080 --> 00:30:48,720
He's here. Hi, damon.
782
00:30:48,750 --> 00:30:51,680
Mikey, my favorite client.
Sorry about that.
783
00:30:51,680 --> 00:30:53,090
I had this new assistant
forwarding calls
784
00:30:53,160 --> 00:30:54,660
And it's just been a mess.
785
00:30:54,740 --> 00:30:57,240
Right. You know, you could try
being a little more gentle.
786
00:30:57,280 --> 00:30:58,560
What are you, my last assistant?
787
00:30:58,590 --> 00:31:00,490
Listen, okay?
I'm calling to let you know
788
00:31:00,530 --> 00:31:02,030
That things are going
well with rooster, okay?
789
00:31:02,110 --> 00:31:03,170
We have an offer?
790
00:31:03,250 --> 00:31:04,610
Well, not an offer per se,
791
00:31:04,690 --> 00:31:06,170
But they do
want you to come back in
792
00:31:06,250 --> 00:31:07,730
And read with the guy with
ho's doing the voice for--
793
00:31:07,770 --> 00:31:10,620
What's the name of
that talking cow again? Um...
794
00:31:10,700 --> 00:31:12,030
Agent bo vine.
795
00:31:12,030 --> 00:31:13,640
Yes, that's the one.
796
00:31:13,720 --> 00:31:15,340
By the way, they're going crazy
797
00:31:15,450 --> 00:31:17,100
For your christmas set
that you did with that woman.
798
00:31:17,180 --> 00:31:19,030
They were
thinking about rewriting
799
00:31:19,110 --> 00:31:20,510
The cow and rooster relationship
800
00:31:20,550 --> 00:31:22,020
To have the same banter,
you know what I mean?
801
00:31:22,100 --> 00:31:23,370
They saw that?
802
00:31:23,380 --> 00:31:24,690
Everyone's seen it.
803
00:31:24,770 --> 00:31:26,140
How is it possible
that my own mother
804
00:31:26,140 --> 00:31:27,520
Knows more about
social media than you do?
805
00:31:27,560 --> 00:31:28,860
Well your mother
doesn't get death threats
806
00:31:28,890 --> 00:31:30,440
From teenage comic book fans.
807
00:31:30,480 --> 00:31:31,780
Keep up the appearances, okay?
808
00:31:31,810 --> 00:31:33,640
And we need more
viral moments to keep going,
809
00:31:33,720 --> 00:31:35,370
So that the studio
cannot say no.
810
00:31:35,450 --> 00:31:37,150
(sighing)
you know, there was a time
811
00:31:37,220 --> 00:31:38,800
When an actor could
just give a good audition.
812
00:31:38,880 --> 00:31:41,230
Well, when you see that actor,
tell him I said good morrow.
813
00:31:41,240 --> 00:31:43,470
Until then, let's keep
the viral moments coming, okay?
814
00:31:43,550 --> 00:31:45,050
Viral moments...
815
00:31:45,120 --> 00:31:47,400
You look amazing up there.
Your body's looking better.
816
00:31:47,400 --> 00:31:49,220
But you know,
rooster's a superhero.
817
00:31:49,290 --> 00:31:50,570
You know what I mean?
818
00:31:50,570 --> 00:31:52,500
- Goodbye, damon.
- No, no, no, listen.
819
00:31:52,570 --> 00:31:55,240
I'm just saying the carbs
at the dinner on christmas--
820
00:31:57,730 --> 00:32:00,660
The studio loved me
at the tree lighting.
821
00:32:00,660 --> 00:32:04,640
Apparently, I'm one step
closer to getting the part.
822
00:32:04,680 --> 00:32:06,630
You don't seem excited.
823
00:32:06,660 --> 00:32:09,010
No, I am.
824
00:32:09,050 --> 00:32:11,650
I am. It's just...
825
00:32:11,680 --> 00:32:15,410
...Being back made me remember
how much I love stand-up,
826
00:32:15,490 --> 00:32:17,970
Being on stage,
being in front of an audience.
827
00:32:18,010 --> 00:32:21,670
You don't have to be
a superhero to be successful.
828
00:32:21,740 --> 00:32:23,660
I have to raise my profile.
829
00:32:23,700 --> 00:32:25,750
I took a big hit
with those indies.
830
00:32:25,780 --> 00:32:28,510
Any lower and I'll be going out
for the voice of agent bo vine.
831
00:32:28,580 --> 00:32:33,650
Look, things are good.
Everything is good.
832
00:32:35,190 --> 00:32:37,370
Good.
833
00:32:37,450 --> 00:32:42,080
(kids chattering)
834
00:32:45,040 --> 00:32:49,000
(sighing)
bella, it's almost show time.
835
00:32:49,040 --> 00:32:50,790
You're going to
have to tell them
836
00:32:50,860 --> 00:32:53,470
That I've got an emergency
with my dog or something.
837
00:32:53,550 --> 00:32:55,490
Nope, I've already
used that one. You're stuck.
838
00:32:55,570 --> 00:32:58,510
Now, please,
just come on out already.
839
00:32:58,550 --> 00:33:00,510
Look at this sack.
840
00:33:00,520 --> 00:33:02,810
When you said
a christmas legend,
841
00:33:02,810 --> 00:33:05,890
I imagined somebody
much more glamorous,
842
00:33:05,960 --> 00:33:07,640
Not santa's stay-at-home hag.
843
00:33:07,670 --> 00:33:09,070
Oh, no. No.
844
00:33:09,110 --> 00:33:12,910
No. Mrs. Claus is
a business owner.
845
00:33:12,990 --> 00:33:16,680
I mean, without her, the entire
operation just falls apart.
846
00:33:16,760 --> 00:33:18,720
I mean, she, she is strong
847
00:33:18,750 --> 00:33:23,050
And she is independent.
848
00:33:23,090 --> 00:33:24,710
She's probably rich, too, right?
849
00:33:24,740 --> 00:33:27,090
- Oh, yeah.
- Oh.
850
00:33:27,170 --> 00:33:29,820
You sure couldn't tell
from the horrible shoes.
851
00:33:29,900 --> 00:33:31,710
Where is my husband?
852
00:33:31,750 --> 00:33:35,400
Actually, I don't know,
but he better show up soon.
853
00:33:35,430 --> 00:33:37,330
(kids chattering, whooping)
854
00:33:37,400 --> 00:33:38,750
What is that noise?
855
00:33:38,830 --> 00:33:40,900
Those are children, bella.
856
00:33:40,940 --> 00:33:44,020
(kids chattering, whooping)
857
00:33:44,100 --> 00:33:45,860
Uh...
Robert is playing santa
858
00:33:45,940 --> 00:33:47,260
And he just texted that
he's caught in traffic.
859
00:33:47,340 --> 00:33:49,280
So, we're going to have
to do without him.
860
00:33:49,360 --> 00:33:50,520
No. No.
861
00:33:50,520 --> 00:33:51,430
Yes. Yes.
862
00:33:51,510 --> 00:33:52,670
No, not alone.
863
00:33:52,750 --> 00:33:55,010
You go, get a costume
864
00:33:55,090 --> 00:33:56,570
Or change into
something less drab.
865
00:33:56,610 --> 00:33:58,220
You want me?
866
00:33:58,220 --> 00:34:00,510
We are going
to do this together.
867
00:34:00,540 --> 00:34:01,990
Aubri, don't you think that
868
00:34:02,030 --> 00:34:05,040
If mrs. Claus liked children,
she would have had some by now?
869
00:34:05,120 --> 00:34:09,270
(sighing)
uh...
870
00:34:09,350 --> 00:34:13,920
Excuse me.
Where did you get that costume?
871
00:34:15,720 --> 00:34:18,460
Okay, how excited
are we to see santa?
872
00:34:18,540 --> 00:34:20,720
Very excited.
873
00:34:20,720 --> 00:34:23,390
Oh!
Hey, robert,
874
00:34:23,390 --> 00:34:24,430
I'll call you right back.
875
00:34:24,470 --> 00:34:26,390
- Hi.
- Mike, what are you doing here?
876
00:34:26,390 --> 00:34:29,250
I brought my sister
and her girls to see santa.
877
00:34:29,250 --> 00:34:30,820
This is olivia,
this is gabrielle.
878
00:34:30,900 --> 00:34:33,810
- Nice to meet you.
- Girls: Nice to meet you, too.
879
00:34:33,820 --> 00:34:35,380
- How's it going?
- Good.
880
00:34:35,460 --> 00:34:38,660
Well, our santa's having a bit
of a panic attack on the I-94,
881
00:34:38,740 --> 00:34:40,470
And the kids are lining up,
and bella's the only one there.
882
00:34:40,550 --> 00:34:41,720
This is an emergency.
883
00:34:41,750 --> 00:34:43,240
Yeah, it's been
quite the morning
884
00:34:43,240 --> 00:34:44,620
And I don't know what to do.
885
00:34:44,650 --> 00:34:47,320
I mean, I can't make the kids
wait any longer, so...
886
00:34:47,400 --> 00:34:49,170
What?
887
00:34:49,250 --> 00:34:50,570
Are you thinking
what I'm thinking?
888
00:34:50,640 --> 00:34:54,090
- Mm-hmm.
- Yeah.
889
00:34:54,090 --> 00:34:55,590
- Oh, no, no, no.
- It'll be great.
890
00:34:55,590 --> 00:34:56,960
- I don't think so.
- Mike...
891
00:35:00,820 --> 00:35:01,900
Bella!
892
00:35:01,940 --> 00:35:03,640
Good news, we have a...
893
00:35:06,770 --> 00:35:08,600
What is this?
894
00:35:09,900 --> 00:35:14,730
Mrs. Claus has turned
into a magnificent angel.
895
00:35:14,730 --> 00:35:17,020
That's dark, don't you think?
896
00:35:17,050 --> 00:35:19,190
Mike?
897
00:35:19,260 --> 00:35:21,780
You can't be here, mike.
This is my thing.
898
00:35:21,780 --> 00:35:24,670
We have to have mrs. Claus.
899
00:35:24,710 --> 00:35:27,770
She hands out cookies.
Angels, they can't bake.
900
00:35:27,850 --> 00:35:31,000
Angel cookies?
Angel food cake?
901
00:35:32,050 --> 00:35:33,610
(muttering) angel cookies--
no, no, no.
902
00:35:33,690 --> 00:35:37,190
The kids, they're out there and
they're expecting mrs. Claus,
903
00:35:37,220 --> 00:35:39,130
And there's feathers everywhere.
904
00:35:39,130 --> 00:35:41,880
Bella, this is not gonna work
and we are late already.
905
00:35:41,880 --> 00:35:43,630
If you are so concerned
906
00:35:43,640 --> 00:35:46,140
About those so-called "kids",
you wear the sack.
907
00:35:46,210 --> 00:35:47,560
Yeah, you put on the sack.
908
00:35:47,640 --> 00:35:50,520
And look, I knew this
was going to be perfect.
909
00:35:50,550 --> 00:35:52,140
- Mike: Oh...
- Bella: The gray!
910
00:35:52,150 --> 00:35:54,190
- Really looks so good on you.
- Oh, yeah?
911
00:35:55,920 --> 00:36:00,300
I mean, doesn't this
make a lot more sense?
912
00:36:00,380 --> 00:36:01,650
Children.
913
00:36:01,650 --> 00:36:03,110
Mike: Mm-hmm.
914
00:36:03,150 --> 00:36:04,250
Oh!
915
00:36:04,320 --> 00:36:07,160
Well, merry christmas, children.
916
00:36:07,240 --> 00:36:11,170
Come and say hello
to santa and mrs. Claus.
917
00:36:11,250 --> 00:36:14,560
Ho, ho, ho!
918
00:36:14,590 --> 00:36:16,020
Welcome to my village!
919
00:36:16,090 --> 00:36:17,690
(kids clamoring)
920
00:36:17,760 --> 00:36:19,930
- Welcome to my village!
- (kids clamoring)
921
00:36:19,960 --> 00:36:23,930
Mrs. Claus has been baking
cookies all day for you!
922
00:36:23,970 --> 00:36:27,180
All right, all right,
you sugar plums.
923
00:36:27,180 --> 00:36:29,410
If you can just form
a single line...
924
00:36:29,440 --> 00:36:32,680
And santa will hear
all your christmas requests.
925
00:36:32,690 --> 00:36:34,020
I forgot to mention,
926
00:36:34,020 --> 00:36:36,020
I don't have a lot
of experience with kids.
927
00:36:36,020 --> 00:36:37,900
Oh, you'll be fine.
They love santa.
928
00:36:37,930 --> 00:36:40,930
Okay, okay, everybody!
929
00:36:41,010 --> 00:36:42,840
Take one cookie!
930
00:36:42,920 --> 00:36:44,790
Okay, two!
Two cookies!
931
00:36:44,860 --> 00:36:47,610
Okay, is there an
elf that can help us?!
932
00:36:47,680 --> 00:36:50,530
Okay, three!
Everyone gets three!
933
00:36:50,540 --> 00:36:52,790
- Bella!
- Is there an elf back there?!
934
00:36:52,860 --> 00:36:53,950
I'm here!
935
00:36:53,960 --> 00:36:55,370
You've been bumped!
936
00:36:55,380 --> 00:36:56,930
You can't bump santa!
937
00:36:56,970 --> 00:36:59,940
Oh, it happens,
even to the best of us.
938
00:36:59,970 --> 00:37:02,760
Mike! Aubri!
939
00:37:02,790 --> 00:37:05,680
♪ silent night
shh...
940
00:37:05,710 --> 00:37:07,760
Okay.
♪ holy night
941
00:37:07,800 --> 00:37:11,610
♪ all is calm
942
00:37:11,620 --> 00:37:13,170
We're being calm.
943
00:37:13,170 --> 00:37:16,820
♪ all is bright
but we're still having fun.
944
00:37:16,900 --> 00:37:17,990
♪ round...
945
00:37:18,060 --> 00:37:21,980
Look!
You're under the mistletoe!
946
00:37:23,400 --> 00:37:26,450
(giggling)
947
00:37:26,560 --> 00:37:27,890
I got some great
videos of you today.
948
00:37:27,970 --> 00:37:29,390
You should post them.
949
00:37:29,470 --> 00:37:31,970
Maybe not the ones of you
weeping like a small child.
950
00:37:32,000 --> 00:37:33,890
All right, you know what?
You just witnessed a man
951
00:37:33,970 --> 00:37:36,640
Getting trampled by
cookie-deprived children,
952
00:37:36,670 --> 00:37:38,110
And all you're doing
is trying to get views.
953
00:37:38,260 --> 00:37:40,340
Hey, you wanted to connect
with your audience more.
954
00:37:40,380 --> 00:37:41,590
This is the perfect way.
955
00:37:41,590 --> 00:37:43,080
A little less terror
would have been better.
956
00:37:43,160 --> 00:37:45,070
My agent thinks
it's helping with the studio.
957
00:37:45,150 --> 00:37:46,500
Yeah, I'm sure.
958
00:37:46,580 --> 00:37:48,410
You know, I think you should
show people the real you.
959
00:37:48,410 --> 00:37:51,520
The kids, they loved you.
You were a big hit.
960
00:37:51,600 --> 00:37:56,490
Yeah, well, grandpa is pretty
bad with social media stuff.
961
00:37:56,500 --> 00:37:58,140
Will you help me?
962
00:37:58,180 --> 00:37:59,650
Yeah, of course.
And afterwards,
963
00:37:59,680 --> 00:38:01,760
Maybe I can even teach you
about internet dial-up.
964
00:38:01,840 --> 00:38:03,870
What about tomorrow night?
965
00:38:03,870 --> 00:38:05,440
Caroline's?
966
00:38:05,520 --> 00:38:07,690
I hear they have
a famous chocolate cake.
967
00:38:07,760 --> 00:38:09,520
All right, you know what?
968
00:38:09,560 --> 00:38:10,930
If you don't
like chocolate cake,
969
00:38:10,930 --> 00:38:12,270
I'm going to go hang
with the shepherds.
970
00:38:12,340 --> 00:38:13,930
It's just,
we have an event this week
971
00:38:14,010 --> 00:38:15,550
And bella needs
new material, so...
972
00:38:15,620 --> 00:38:17,440
Well, if you want we could
work on jokes together.
973
00:38:17,520 --> 00:38:21,020
I was planning on dropping in
for open mic night, anyway.
974
00:38:21,050 --> 00:38:24,460
Yes, bella would love it
if you went up. Yeah,
975
00:38:24,460 --> 00:38:26,390
Why don't you come
on stage with me?
976
00:38:26,470 --> 00:38:28,190
- We'll do a set together.
- No.
977
00:38:28,230 --> 00:38:30,450
Come on, it'll be fun. You could
always do your own set.
978
00:38:30,530 --> 00:38:31,970
- Oh, no.
- It'll be fun.
979
00:38:31,970 --> 00:38:33,310
- No.
- All right. All right. I tried.
980
00:38:33,350 --> 00:38:34,510
I got to get back to my sister.
981
00:38:34,550 --> 00:38:39,310
I'll see you tomorrow night,
eight o'clock.
982
00:38:46,030 --> 00:38:47,900
Wow!
983
00:38:47,980 --> 00:38:50,860
- Who's the hot date?
- Uh, not a date.
984
00:38:50,900 --> 00:38:52,650
Okay? A work meeting.
985
00:38:52,730 --> 00:38:54,170
I'm helping mike
with social media
986
00:38:54,240 --> 00:38:55,390
And he's helping me with jokes.
987
00:38:55,420 --> 00:38:57,750
He's a very lucky
work colleague.
988
00:38:57,830 --> 00:39:01,470
He doesn't see me like that.
Stars date other stars.
989
00:39:01,510 --> 00:39:02,910
Yeah, well, last time I checked,
990
00:39:02,990 --> 00:39:04,390
You're the funniest
person I know.
991
00:39:04,430 --> 00:39:06,080
Then, wish me luck...
With work.
992
00:39:06,160 --> 00:39:08,160
- Uh-huh.
- With work.
993
00:39:08,230 --> 00:39:10,470
Good luck.
994
00:39:13,330 --> 00:39:16,670
(customers chattering)
995
00:39:16,750 --> 00:39:20,730
(customers gasping)
996
00:39:20,760 --> 00:39:22,230
- (chattering)
- hi.
997
00:39:22,260 --> 00:39:24,410
Excuse me, is the table
a little more private?
998
00:39:24,450 --> 00:39:26,010
Thanks.
999
00:39:26,080 --> 00:39:28,820
- (cheering)
- okay, bye.
1000
00:39:30,010 --> 00:39:32,700
Both: Thank you.
1001
00:39:32,700 --> 00:39:35,350
Aubri: Okay...
1002
00:39:35,430 --> 00:39:37,580
- Thank you.
- Mike: Thank you.
1003
00:39:37,610 --> 00:39:40,390
If my agent asks,
I ordered cottage cheese.
1004
00:39:40,470 --> 00:39:41,820
Rooster?
1005
00:39:41,900 --> 00:39:44,450
They want this version of me
that doesn't exist.
1006
00:39:44,530 --> 00:39:46,250
Apparently,
superheroes eat like monks.
1007
00:39:46,290 --> 00:39:48,420
Okay, and what do you want?
1008
00:39:48,460 --> 00:39:51,260
I want to enjoy my life
and make people happy.
1009
00:39:51,290 --> 00:39:54,720
I got Saturday sketch club at 19
and for the first time,
1010
00:39:54,720 --> 00:39:56,700
I was successful,
but it felt like
1011
00:39:56,780 --> 00:39:59,270
I needed to prove myself
as a real actor.
1012
00:39:59,300 --> 00:40:02,300
So, I started doing these
dramas, which all flopped,
1013
00:40:02,300 --> 00:40:06,460
And then it felt like I needed
to be on top to be happy.
1014
00:40:06,490 --> 00:40:11,240
Okay, so, the dramas flopped,
but why not go back to comedy?
1015
00:40:11,240 --> 00:40:12,550
I love comedy,
1016
00:40:12,630 --> 00:40:14,800
But I wanted to feel
in control of my life again.
1017
00:40:14,830 --> 00:40:17,920
You know, failed relationships
and box office disasters.
1018
00:40:17,990 --> 00:40:20,950
So, I took myself out of the
comedy game entirely,
1019
00:40:20,990 --> 00:40:22,810
Put myself in early retirement.
1020
00:40:22,840 --> 00:40:25,010
Got myself a landline,
and a walker,
1021
00:40:25,080 --> 00:40:26,790
And a whole bunch of hard candy.
1022
00:40:26,830 --> 00:40:28,980
Okay, well, to me, it seems like
1023
00:40:29,010 --> 00:40:30,980
You were afraid
to fail at something
1024
00:40:31,020 --> 00:40:32,500
That was really
important to you.
1025
00:40:32,580 --> 00:40:34,860
Well, right now all that's
important to me is carb-loading
1026
00:40:34,860 --> 00:40:36,320
Before I need a six-pack.
1027
00:40:36,350 --> 00:40:37,500
Okay, you don't have to do that.
1028
00:40:37,580 --> 00:40:39,760
No, I do.
It's-- it's in my contract.
1029
00:40:39,840 --> 00:40:42,920
It's a contractual six-pack.
1030
00:40:42,990 --> 00:40:44,860
It's okay to be
yourself, you know?
1031
00:40:44,940 --> 00:40:49,090
You don't have to
prove anything to me.
1032
00:40:49,170 --> 00:40:51,360
Sometimes, it feels like
1033
00:40:51,360 --> 00:40:52,940
I need to prove to everyone
1034
00:40:52,940 --> 00:40:55,110
That I'm still that
19-year-old success story.
1035
00:40:55,110 --> 00:40:57,310
Is that why you're
taking rooster?
1036
00:40:57,460 --> 00:40:59,690
Because it seems to me
like you don't really want it.
1037
00:40:59,730 --> 00:41:00,940
I do.
1038
00:41:01,010 --> 00:41:02,770
It's the only way
to come back on top.
1039
00:41:02,850 --> 00:41:05,330
I just want to make
people smile again.
1040
00:41:05,370 --> 00:41:08,110
Well, for what it's worth,
you make me smile
1041
00:41:08,190 --> 00:41:12,040
Without being star of
screen and stage mike baxter.
1042
00:41:12,110 --> 00:41:14,470
You're different.
1043
00:41:14,540 --> 00:41:17,640
I am talking so much.
1044
00:41:17,640 --> 00:41:21,620
Way too much. What about you?
What about your stage debut?
1045
00:41:21,700 --> 00:41:23,520
I mean, you've got
that star quality.
1046
00:41:23,550 --> 00:41:25,310
Nobody can take
their eyes off of you.
1047
00:41:26,840 --> 00:41:31,690
Is-is what everyone believes.
1048
00:41:31,730 --> 00:41:32,970
Not just me.
1049
00:41:33,040 --> 00:41:34,990
That's all I'm saying.
1050
00:41:36,580 --> 00:41:38,410
It's better for me
off-stage, trust me.
1051
00:41:38,490 --> 00:41:40,050
Who told you that?
1052
00:41:40,080 --> 00:41:41,810
Everyone,
1053
00:41:41,890 --> 00:41:43,920
Bella, my mom,
eighth-grade drama teacher.
1054
00:41:44,000 --> 00:41:47,210
No, to not even try, when you're
clearly as talented as you are,
1055
00:41:47,240 --> 00:41:48,540
It's absolutely crazy to me.
1056
00:41:48,580 --> 00:41:50,580
You owe it to yourself to try.
1057
00:41:50,590 --> 00:41:51,840
I have goals, I do.
1058
00:41:51,880 --> 00:41:54,090
My goal is to get
in the writers room,
1059
00:41:54,170 --> 00:41:56,080
You know,
write for stars like you.
1060
00:41:56,160 --> 00:41:59,510
Stars like me... Look, don't
waste your talent behind a desk.
1061
00:41:59,510 --> 00:42:02,470
You should make this
christmas mean something.
1062
00:42:02,470 --> 00:42:05,350
It's the best time
to follow your heart.
1063
00:42:05,350 --> 00:42:08,030
You might be surprised
where it leads you.
1064
00:42:08,100 --> 00:42:11,610
Christmas has this way of giving
us exactly what we need.
1065
00:42:11,690 --> 00:42:13,570
(chuckling)
1066
00:42:13,600 --> 00:42:16,920
- Bella.
- Hello, darling.
1067
00:42:16,920 --> 00:42:21,420
Thank you so much for fitting my
little show into your schedule.
1068
00:42:21,460 --> 00:42:22,850
Oh! Ha-ha!
1069
00:42:22,930 --> 00:42:27,080
Well, if having over a million
subscribers to a podcast
1070
00:42:27,120 --> 00:42:31,930
Is little, then my fan base
is like a flea circus.
1071
00:42:31,970 --> 00:42:35,140
You must be so excited with
the comedy club going viral.
1072
00:42:35,140 --> 00:42:37,790
Oh, yes.
Well, mike baxter is performing.
1073
00:42:37,790 --> 00:42:39,430
Oh, it always makes us so happy
1074
00:42:39,430 --> 00:42:42,630
When our stars come back
home to their roots.
1075
00:42:42,710 --> 00:42:44,820
Absolutely.
Him and this new comic
1076
00:42:44,900 --> 00:42:47,550
Are certainly
causing a sensation,
1077
00:42:47,630 --> 00:42:49,310
Oh, and promoting
the comedy club.
1078
00:42:49,310 --> 00:42:50,990
New comic?
1079
00:42:51,000 --> 00:42:53,220
Yes, yes, yes.
Please tell me all about her.
1080
00:42:53,260 --> 00:42:54,850
I mean, breaking new talent
1081
00:42:54,930 --> 00:42:56,230
Is part of
the comedy club's legacy.
1082
00:42:56,300 --> 00:42:59,070
Uh-huh.
1083
00:43:00,730 --> 00:43:02,240
Bella: Huh?
1084
00:43:02,240 --> 00:43:03,670
Oh.
(chuckling)
1085
00:43:03,740 --> 00:43:05,480
That's my assistant.
1086
00:43:05,560 --> 00:43:07,300
She has to get me
coffee when I ask her.
1087
00:43:07,340 --> 00:43:10,610
Oh, well,
that is so sweet of you
1088
00:43:10,680 --> 00:43:12,730
To give her
a platform at christmas.
1089
00:43:12,760 --> 00:43:14,980
She is clearly a rising talent.
1090
00:43:15,010 --> 00:43:17,260
May not be your
assistant for long.
1091
00:43:23,790 --> 00:43:25,760
Aubri, say something
into the mic quick.
1092
00:43:25,790 --> 00:43:27,640
Oh, hey, how was the podcast?
1093
00:43:27,680 --> 00:43:29,180
Well, good.
1094
00:43:29,250 --> 00:43:30,640
Insightful.
1095
00:43:30,680 --> 00:43:33,010
I had no idea that the club
1096
00:43:33,090 --> 00:43:35,480
Was causing such
a buzz on the internet.
1097
00:43:35,520 --> 00:43:37,380
Yeah, having mike
around helps a lot.
1098
00:43:37,450 --> 00:43:39,650
Yeah, of course it does.
He's a big star.
1099
00:43:39,690 --> 00:43:42,460
So, aubri, how are tickets
going for the variety show?
1100
00:43:42,460 --> 00:43:46,870
Um, okay. I think as soon
as I secure a headliner,
1101
00:43:46,950 --> 00:43:49,520
Then, uh, things
should really pick up.
1102
00:43:49,600 --> 00:43:50,690
Yeah, it's tough, I know.
1103
00:43:50,770 --> 00:43:52,110
I'll tell you...
(clearing throat)
1104
00:43:52,180 --> 00:43:55,520
...I won't perform,
but I will host.
1105
00:43:55,550 --> 00:43:57,960
Sure.
1106
00:43:57,960 --> 00:43:59,760
Yeah, I think
everybody will love that.
1107
00:43:59,790 --> 00:44:02,460
I know they will.
Well, duty calls.
1108
00:44:02,540 --> 00:44:04,030
If the christmas fest needs me,
1109
00:44:04,110 --> 00:44:05,640
I'll be there.
1110
00:44:05,720 --> 00:44:07,850
Does this mean you'll be
attending other events?
1111
00:44:07,850 --> 00:44:09,420
What's next?
1112
00:44:09,490 --> 00:44:10,580
Twinkle tunnel.
1113
00:44:10,660 --> 00:44:12,740
Ah. Is there an audience?
1114
00:44:12,810 --> 00:44:14,220
No, it's a tunnel.
1115
00:44:14,300 --> 00:44:16,460
But there will be
at the snowball social,
1116
00:44:16,540 --> 00:44:17,690
Which is right afterwards.
1117
00:44:17,800 --> 00:44:19,230
Okay, you can count on me.
1118
00:44:19,300 --> 00:44:21,240
I'll be there with a costume on.
1119
00:44:21,320 --> 00:44:23,820
Now, aubri, I don't want you
filling in for me
1120
00:44:23,820 --> 00:44:25,370
Any longer, darling.
1121
00:44:25,400 --> 00:44:29,240
I can tell by the state of your
under eyes that you are working
1122
00:44:29,270 --> 00:44:31,050
Way, way, way too hard.
1123
00:44:31,130 --> 00:44:34,120
Now, and I'll need new material.
1124
00:44:34,120 --> 00:44:36,000
For tonight?
1125
00:44:36,000 --> 00:44:38,840
That is what
I pay you for, isn't it?
1126
00:44:38,920 --> 00:44:40,500
Not to be prancing
around on stage,
1127
00:44:40,510 --> 00:44:42,060
Flirting with mike baxter.
1128
00:44:42,100 --> 00:44:45,590
Uh, yes, I will send you some
new stuff this afternoon.
1129
00:44:45,590 --> 00:44:48,640
Excellent.
See that you do.
1130
00:44:50,440 --> 00:44:54,030
Well, that was
a sudden change of heart.
1131
00:44:54,060 --> 00:44:56,520
No, no, I've seen this before.
When her last husband remarried,
1132
00:44:56,520 --> 00:44:59,110
She made me send all these fake
rumors to tabloids and stuff.
1133
00:44:59,190 --> 00:45:02,590
She must think mike's
performing at the variety show.
1134
00:45:02,670 --> 00:45:04,990
Oh, it's too late now.
1135
00:45:04,990 --> 00:45:06,470
We've got some
auditions to watch,
1136
00:45:06,550 --> 00:45:09,850
So I'm going to think about what
to do with that later.
1137
00:45:09,930 --> 00:45:11,690
I really think you
should try and beatbox.
1138
00:45:11,760 --> 00:45:13,520
- I think you could do it.
- Oh, absolutely.
1139
00:45:13,600 --> 00:45:15,190
- Yeah, you could.
- Hey, guys.
1140
00:45:15,270 --> 00:45:16,880
Sorry, I'm late.
This is my sister steph.
1141
00:45:16,960 --> 00:45:18,350
- Hi.
- Steph, this is aubri.
1142
00:45:18,390 --> 00:45:19,980
- This is ian.
- Both: Nice to meet you.
1143
00:45:20,050 --> 00:45:21,550
Mike said you wouldn't
mind if I watched.
1144
00:45:21,620 --> 00:45:23,090
I told her we
were judging people,
1145
00:45:23,200 --> 00:45:24,660
And she forced me to bring her.
1146
00:45:24,730 --> 00:45:26,760
Aubri: Not at all.
Please, take a seat.
1147
00:45:29,390 --> 00:45:30,450
Oh, wow.
1148
00:45:30,480 --> 00:45:31,850
Ian: I like the sweater.
1149
00:45:31,880 --> 00:45:33,530
- He's got a nice outfit.
- Man: Thank you.
1150
00:45:33,570 --> 00:45:35,890
Aubri, I, uh--
I love you.
1151
00:45:38,220 --> 00:45:41,240
I really, really love you.
1152
00:45:41,280 --> 00:45:44,720
I really appreciate you.
1153
00:45:44,800 --> 00:45:48,480
(discordant notes sounding)
1154
00:45:48,560 --> 00:45:50,420
- Can I start again?
- Sure, you can try again.
1155
00:45:50,490 --> 00:45:52,950
- Yeah, one more try.
- (discordant notes sounding)
1156
00:45:52,990 --> 00:45:55,340
Keep-- keep taking lessons.
1157
00:45:55,410 --> 00:45:57,580
This is theatre.
1158
00:45:57,660 --> 00:46:00,420
My name?
Meaningless.
1159
00:46:03,420 --> 00:46:05,530
Oh, thank-- thank you.
1160
00:46:05,610 --> 00:46:07,630
I'm a poet.
The club.
1161
00:46:07,670 --> 00:46:11,170
Chicken club.
Turkey club.
1162
00:46:11,250 --> 00:46:13,490
- Comedy club.
- (snapping)
1163
00:46:13,490 --> 00:46:15,440
One, two, three. Christmas tree,
1164
00:46:15,480 --> 00:46:19,100
Aubri, you and me.
1165
00:46:20,680 --> 00:46:22,670
Oh! Oh!
1166
00:46:22,750 --> 00:46:24,940
(drumming)
1167
00:46:25,020 --> 00:46:26,620
- That's-- thank you.
- That's good.
1168
00:46:26,650 --> 00:46:27,860
Aubri: Thank you.
1169
00:46:27,940 --> 00:46:30,200
It's okay.
I got one more.
1170
00:46:30,200 --> 00:46:33,280
You tell luca to stay.
1171
00:46:33,290 --> 00:46:34,680
Luca's a method actor.
1172
00:46:34,710 --> 00:46:35,970
Oh, no, no.
1173
00:46:35,970 --> 00:46:37,080
Mike: It's gonna be okay.
1174
00:46:37,110 --> 00:46:39,290
(drumming)
1175
00:46:39,370 --> 00:46:41,820
(all snapping)
1176
00:46:41,900 --> 00:46:43,520
Actor: Nice. Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
1177
00:46:43,550 --> 00:46:45,800
(chuckling)
I loved the juggler.
1178
00:46:45,840 --> 00:46:48,690
The juggler might have been
my favorite, actually.
1179
00:46:48,730 --> 00:46:49,900
Thank you guys for letting me
1180
00:46:49,980 --> 00:46:52,190
Put my judgmental skills
to good use.
1181
00:46:52,230 --> 00:46:53,800
Let me know if you want tickets.
1182
00:46:53,870 --> 00:46:56,270
Oh, I would, but my husband
gets home on christmas eve,
1183
00:46:56,300 --> 00:46:59,870
And we have this tradition
of dinner and movies,
1184
00:46:59,900 --> 00:47:01,190
By which I mean takeout
1185
00:47:01,190 --> 00:47:02,720
And fighting over
what movie to watch.
1186
00:47:02,800 --> 00:47:05,720
I guess most people are
staying home on christmas eve
1187
00:47:05,800 --> 00:47:07,240
Instead of buying tickets, so...
1188
00:47:07,320 --> 00:47:08,740
You'll get your audience.
1189
00:47:08,820 --> 00:47:11,530
Yeah, hopefully, we will,
with these new acts.
1190
00:47:11,570 --> 00:47:13,880
Anyway, we should get back.
It's open mic night.
1191
00:47:13,920 --> 00:47:16,540
Good. I'll see you tonight.
1192
00:47:16,650 --> 00:47:18,250
Really?
1193
00:47:18,330 --> 00:47:22,210
Yeah, but keep it a secret.
I want an unsuspecting audience.
1194
00:47:23,630 --> 00:47:26,840
- See you tonight.
- See ya.
1195
00:47:26,910 --> 00:47:33,170
♪
1196
00:47:33,200 --> 00:47:35,570
At christmas, dads hold court.
1197
00:47:35,610 --> 00:47:37,110
We're the ones who have
a direct line to santa.
1198
00:47:37,190 --> 00:47:39,240
Like, kids must laugh
at our jokes, right?
1199
00:47:39,320 --> 00:47:42,540
Who's never hungry at christmas?
1200
00:47:42,620 --> 00:47:44,160
- (mouthing "turkey")
- woman: I don't know.
1201
00:47:44,200 --> 00:47:45,630
Turkey!
1202
00:47:45,710 --> 00:47:48,330
- Because he's always stuffed.
- Woman: Oh, come on.
1203
00:47:48,370 --> 00:47:50,850
Oh, come on. Remember
who's got the line to santa.
1204
00:47:50,930 --> 00:47:52,420
Please, please, be nice, folks.
1205
00:47:52,460 --> 00:47:55,780
By the way, my name is jeremy.
1206
00:47:55,860 --> 00:47:57,910
Oh, open mic is tough.
1207
00:47:57,950 --> 00:48:00,430
Dying is easy, comedy is hard.
1208
00:48:00,460 --> 00:48:02,950
That's why I always
stay behind the scenes.
1209
00:48:03,030 --> 00:48:04,920
Okay!
1210
00:48:04,950 --> 00:48:08,040
Let's all give it up for jeremy!
1211
00:48:08,070 --> 00:48:10,950
- (audience applauding)
- jeremy!
1212
00:48:11,030 --> 00:48:12,120
(laughing)
1213
00:48:12,230 --> 00:48:14,930
Good for you, jeremy.
1214
00:48:15,000 --> 00:48:17,280
Okay, settle back,
have a drink.
1215
00:48:17,310 --> 00:48:20,120
Our next comic will be
coming up in a minute.
1216
00:48:20,150 --> 00:48:21,320
(audience applauding)
1217
00:48:21,390 --> 00:48:22,880
Hey, how's the audience tonight?
1218
00:48:22,950 --> 00:48:24,380
Ooh, somewhere between
gazpacho and room temp.
1219
00:48:24,460 --> 00:48:26,970
Right where I like them.
1220
00:48:27,050 --> 00:48:28,310
You're not nervous?
1221
00:48:28,380 --> 00:48:30,790
I mean, this is your first
stand-up in years.
1222
00:48:30,900 --> 00:48:32,460
I'm excited.
1223
00:48:32,500 --> 00:48:34,210
I just hope they
remember who I am.
1224
00:48:34,250 --> 00:48:35,650
Or at least forget
my last movie.
1225
00:48:35,720 --> 00:48:37,200
They'll love you.
1226
00:48:37,200 --> 00:48:39,800
Why don't you go up there
and shine, super star?
1227
00:48:39,840 --> 00:48:43,760
All right, pretend to
laugh no matter what.
1228
00:48:43,840 --> 00:48:46,000
(audience chattering)
1229
00:48:47,130 --> 00:48:48,290
- Testing.
- Whoo!
1230
00:48:48,330 --> 00:48:50,550
Can we get
some lights, please?
1231
00:48:50,550 --> 00:48:52,160
(audience cheering)
1232
00:48:52,240 --> 00:48:55,080
Stop it. Thank you. Thank you.
You're very kind.
1233
00:48:55,150 --> 00:48:56,500
Please, stop.
1234
00:48:56,540 --> 00:48:58,600
All right, keep it going,
keep it going.
1235
00:48:58,680 --> 00:49:01,940
So, christmas,
people talk about the parties,
1236
00:49:01,980 --> 00:49:03,860
The presents, the food.
1237
00:49:03,940 --> 00:49:06,010
But nobody talks about...
1238
00:49:06,090 --> 00:49:08,480
♪ the weird christmas liqueurs
1239
00:49:08,520 --> 00:49:10,150
♪ don't make me drink
1240
00:49:10,180 --> 00:49:12,670
♪ your weird
christmas liqueurs ♪
1241
00:49:12,700 --> 00:49:17,670
♪ it's like they mix vegetables
with some menthol ♪
1242
00:49:17,710 --> 00:49:21,610
♪ it tastes a lot
like pepto bismol ♪
1243
00:49:21,650 --> 00:49:24,710
♪ weird christmas liqueurs
1244
00:49:24,750 --> 00:49:27,850
♪ cherry, eggnog
1245
00:49:27,890 --> 00:49:29,280
♪ pumpkin spice
1246
00:49:29,350 --> 00:49:32,610
♪ before you drink it,
I would think twice ♪
1247
00:49:32,690 --> 00:49:36,950
♪ don't give me your
peppermint matcha schnapps ♪
1248
00:49:37,030 --> 00:49:38,840
♪ I drank the whole shot
1249
00:49:38,880 --> 00:49:41,890
♪ and it gave me the craps
1250
00:49:41,890 --> 00:49:43,660
♪ weird christmas liqueurs
1251
00:49:43,660 --> 00:49:45,820
♪ next year, I'll say...
1252
00:49:45,890 --> 00:49:49,840
♪ no thank you
1253
00:49:49,920 --> 00:49:53,560
(audience cheering, applauding)
1254
00:49:53,590 --> 00:49:56,210
Ladies and gentlemen,
I've got a big problem here.
1255
00:49:56,210 --> 00:49:59,650
(upbeat tune playing)
1256
00:49:59,730 --> 00:50:03,810
It's a problem that has plagued
humanity for a very long time.
1257
00:50:03,890 --> 00:50:06,590
♪ uh, uh, uh
1258
00:50:06,670 --> 00:50:08,920
♪ should I buy a fake tree
or the real thing? ♪
1259
00:50:09,000 --> 00:50:12,210
♪ a pine tree has
a lot of needles to clean ♪
1260
00:50:12,250 --> 00:50:15,500
♪ I'm not saying that a real
tree ain't jing-a-ling ♪
1261
00:50:15,570 --> 00:50:18,510
♪ but do I want to do the extra
work and everything?
1262
00:50:18,510 --> 00:50:21,550
♪ I only have
a six-foot ceiling ♪
1263
00:50:21,590 --> 00:50:23,590
♪ my vacuum will
start squealing ♪
1264
00:50:23,670 --> 00:50:27,130
♪ I'm not saying that a real
tree ain't healing ♪
1265
00:50:27,200 --> 00:50:30,500
♪ but suddenly,
a fake one sounds appealing ♪
1266
00:50:30,530 --> 00:50:32,570
♪ I don't wanna be
a grinch to anyone ♪
1267
00:50:32,670 --> 00:50:35,780
♪ but I bet even santa
has a fake one ♪
1268
00:50:35,860 --> 00:50:38,070
♪ I'm not saying that
a real tree ain't fun ♪
1269
00:50:38,110 --> 00:50:41,440
♪ but this year
I'm going with a fake ♪
1270
00:50:41,520 --> 00:50:43,680
♪ don't judge, son
1271
00:50:43,760 --> 00:50:45,390
All right, I'm getting a fake
tree this year, it's settled.
1272
00:50:45,470 --> 00:50:46,690
(audience cheering)
1273
00:50:46,760 --> 00:50:48,020
Thank you for
helping me with that.
1274
00:50:48,100 --> 00:50:50,300
(audience cheering)
1275
00:50:50,380 --> 00:50:52,100
Well!
1276
00:50:52,140 --> 00:50:56,140
Wasn't that a triumphant
return to our stage?
1277
00:50:56,220 --> 00:50:58,300
Mr. Mike baxter!
1278
00:50:58,380 --> 00:51:01,390
- Mike, what's new?
- Hey, I just got off stage.
1279
00:51:01,460 --> 00:51:04,300
Oh, man!
It felt so good to be back.
1280
00:51:04,370 --> 00:51:05,870
Excellent.
I'm actually on my way
1281
00:51:05,950 --> 00:51:07,480
To a christmas party tonight,
but I wanted to tell you
1282
00:51:07,560 --> 00:51:10,340
The vids you sent me
are catching fire!
1283
00:51:10,410 --> 00:51:13,210
Oh, that's great, but this...
This felt right.
1284
00:51:13,290 --> 00:51:17,730
You know, I think we should
start a tour, maybe a special.
1285
00:51:17,800 --> 00:51:19,890
Sure. After you land rooster,
1286
00:51:19,960 --> 00:51:21,910
Then you have
carte blanche in hollywood.
1287
00:51:21,910 --> 00:51:23,820
Well, right,
but I may not get it.
1288
00:51:23,890 --> 00:51:26,930
Well, my buddy told me
that harlow studio execs
1289
00:51:27,000 --> 00:51:28,450
Love that you're
mingling with the people,
1290
00:51:28,490 --> 00:51:29,990
Doing your christmas thing.
1291
00:51:30,070 --> 00:51:31,970
I think you got it in the bag.
1292
00:51:32,010 --> 00:51:34,380
So, let's land this movie,
then talk about stand-up.
1293
00:51:34,410 --> 00:51:36,760
Do you think this
is the right fit for me?
1294
00:51:36,840 --> 00:51:39,260
What if rooster man
is just another bad move?
1295
00:51:39,300 --> 00:51:42,600
You know, I can't afford another
swing and miss like that.
1296
00:51:42,680 --> 00:51:44,410
Stop, stop.
You're being paranoid, okay?
1297
00:51:44,490 --> 00:51:47,160
You're bigger than stand-up.
This is our way back to the top.
1298
00:51:47,240 --> 00:51:48,270
Don't blow it.
1299
00:51:48,340 --> 00:51:50,140
I just want to
connect to people again
1300
00:51:50,140 --> 00:51:51,790
In a real way.
1301
00:51:51,790 --> 00:51:53,780
And you will... In imax.
1302
00:51:53,860 --> 00:51:55,060
Listen, I gotta go, okay?
1303
00:51:55,100 --> 00:51:57,270
But I'm really happy you
had a good time tonight.
1304
00:51:57,300 --> 00:51:58,580
I will keep you posted
1305
00:51:58,690 --> 00:51:59,940
With everything to
do with the studio.
1306
00:52:00,010 --> 00:52:01,510
You are so close.
1307
00:52:01,590 --> 00:52:03,760
It's so close, mike, okay?
1308
00:52:03,840 --> 00:52:05,590
I gotta go. Talk soon.
1309
00:52:05,630 --> 00:52:07,280
Talk soon.
1310
00:52:15,040 --> 00:52:17,840
You know, one time
I bombed so badly,
1311
00:52:17,870 --> 00:52:22,940
The next guy up passed around a
hat to start my relocation fund.
1312
00:52:22,940 --> 00:52:25,220
I made more money that night
than I did the whole month.
1313
00:52:27,120 --> 00:52:30,900
I got laughs with the same
jokes at a club last night.
1314
00:52:30,980 --> 00:52:34,130
Look, there's
no substitution for stage time.
1315
00:52:34,210 --> 00:52:36,630
And just keep
having fun, you know,
1316
00:52:36,710 --> 00:52:38,410
Regardless of
how they're reacting,
1317
00:52:38,480 --> 00:52:39,730
And they're gonna wanna join in.
1318
00:52:39,800 --> 00:52:44,450
Ah, it's great advice.
Thanks. I appreciate it.
1319
00:52:44,480 --> 00:52:46,670
You're a legend, mike baxter.
1320
00:52:46,700 --> 00:52:47,920
Oh, stop it.
1321
00:52:47,990 --> 00:52:49,240
Hey, chin up,
it only gets harder.
1322
00:52:49,320 --> 00:52:50,790
Ha!
1323
00:52:54,190 --> 00:52:55,820
Look at you.
1324
00:52:55,890 --> 00:52:58,000
You were great tonight.
You killed it.
1325
00:52:58,000 --> 00:52:59,880
Thank you, thank you.
It felt great;
1326
00:52:59,910 --> 00:53:02,750
The happiest
I've felt in a long time.
1327
00:53:02,820 --> 00:53:06,220
You know, some people even like
to smile when they're happy.
1328
00:53:07,680 --> 00:53:08,920
(sighing)
okay,
1329
00:53:08,960 --> 00:53:12,720
My agent thinks I need to focus
on acting, not stand-up.
1330
00:53:12,730 --> 00:53:15,910
Maybe you should just focus
on what makes you happy.
1331
00:53:15,950 --> 00:53:19,420
He said if I get the part,
I'll have carte blanche.
1332
00:53:19,450 --> 00:53:21,150
I was too
embarrassed to tell him
1333
00:53:21,190 --> 00:53:23,190
I don't actually speak french.
1334
00:53:23,220 --> 00:53:24,690
Yeah, I'm sure you will,
1335
00:53:24,770 --> 00:53:26,550
Right after the sequel,
the crossover,
1336
00:53:26,620 --> 00:53:28,420
And the reboot where
you pass the torch on
1337
00:53:28,530 --> 00:53:30,880
To a much younger,
much more bankable rooster.
1338
00:53:30,890 --> 00:53:33,750
Mm. Mm-hmm.
Much younger, better. Mm-hmm.
1339
00:53:33,750 --> 00:53:36,850
You know, this christmas,
I feel...
1340
00:53:36,880 --> 00:53:40,920
More alive than I have
for the last five years.
1341
00:53:40,960 --> 00:53:43,310
Why is that?
1342
00:53:43,380 --> 00:53:45,620
Well, a wise man once told me
1343
00:53:45,700 --> 00:53:49,180
That christmas gives you
exactly what you need.
1344
00:53:49,210 --> 00:53:52,100
So, pay attention.
1345
00:53:52,130 --> 00:53:56,620
What if I fall on my face?
What if I fail?
1346
00:53:56,650 --> 00:53:58,270
Well, the comedy club is
actually hiring a janitor.
1347
00:53:58,310 --> 00:54:02,270
We don't offer benefits, but you
can get any show for free.
1348
00:54:03,240 --> 00:54:05,190
Laughing is so easy with you.
1349
00:54:06,320 --> 00:54:08,560
Well, I'm happy to help.
1350
00:54:08,630 --> 00:54:12,300
Now, chin up because
it only gets harder.
1351
00:54:12,340 --> 00:54:14,240
- Chin up, that was my line.
1352
00:54:14,310 --> 00:54:15,620
- Yeah.
- With jeremy.
1353
00:54:15,660 --> 00:54:17,090
You just stole my line.
1354
00:54:17,170 --> 00:54:19,170
- Yeah, that's the whole point.
- I just said that.
1355
00:54:28,590 --> 00:54:29,740
- Hey.
- Hey.
1356
00:54:29,820 --> 00:54:31,140
- Got you an omelet.
- Awesome.
1357
00:54:31,170 --> 00:54:32,970
I haven't had a chance
to eat breakfast yet.
1358
00:54:33,010 --> 00:54:34,510
- How much?
- It's on me.
1359
00:54:34,580 --> 00:54:37,340
Ian, I signed your paychecks,
I know how much you make.
1360
00:54:37,420 --> 00:54:40,350
It's fine. Tickets are at
a standstill for the show.
1361
00:54:40,420 --> 00:54:42,340
Even after mike's
performance last night.
1362
00:54:42,420 --> 00:54:44,150
I know, but we don't have an act
big enough to entice people
1363
00:54:44,180 --> 00:54:46,000
To leave their homes
on christmas eve.
1364
00:54:46,000 --> 00:54:48,940
Honestly, everyone wants to
know if mike will be there.
1365
00:54:48,970 --> 00:54:50,460
I do too.
1366
00:54:50,460 --> 00:54:53,100
Bella's coming.
Just don't mention anything.
1367
00:54:53,180 --> 00:54:54,680
Hi.
1368
00:54:54,710 --> 00:54:56,620
How about last night?
1369
00:54:56,620 --> 00:54:59,360
We got more hearts
on our post than ever.
1370
00:54:59,520 --> 00:55:01,170
That's amazing.
1371
00:55:01,170 --> 00:55:02,230
I was thinking,
1372
00:55:02,310 --> 00:55:04,110
We should give some
hot chocolate
1373
00:55:04,190 --> 00:55:07,550
To the people in the standby
line-up when we sell out.
1374
00:55:07,630 --> 00:55:10,710
What?
For eight, ten bucks a cup?
1375
00:55:10,790 --> 00:55:13,050
We will have to get them
to line up in the back,
1376
00:55:13,130 --> 00:55:15,670
Out in the alley,
because the front
1377
00:55:15,670 --> 00:55:17,640
Is going to be vip only.
1378
00:55:17,720 --> 00:55:19,160
Vip?
1379
00:55:19,240 --> 00:55:22,120
Casting agents and
network execs and directors.
1380
00:55:22,160 --> 00:55:27,160
Oh, they're starting
to swarm like sharks and I,
1381
00:55:27,190 --> 00:55:30,010
Bella, am finally the chum.
1382
00:55:30,090 --> 00:55:31,950
Ah, that's amazing.
1383
00:55:31,980 --> 00:55:33,920
(bella chuckling)
look,
1384
00:55:34,000 --> 00:55:35,980
This variety show
is so important.
1385
00:55:36,020 --> 00:55:40,670
We've got to impress these
people or else, we're finished.
1386
00:55:40,750 --> 00:55:42,140
We don't want that.
1387
00:55:42,180 --> 00:55:44,430
So, tell me
you have this aubri.
1388
00:55:44,500 --> 00:55:46,260
- (phone ringing)
- yes, I will take care of it.
1389
00:55:46,340 --> 00:55:48,600
(phone ringing)
1390
00:55:48,670 --> 00:55:49,840
It's new york.
1391
00:55:49,840 --> 00:55:51,170
Ah, new york.
1392
00:55:51,180 --> 00:55:53,440
This variety show,
it could really change my--
1393
00:55:53,510 --> 00:55:54,740
Our career.
1394
00:55:54,740 --> 00:55:56,740
Yeah.
1395
00:55:56,770 --> 00:55:58,330
I'll see you both later.
1396
00:55:58,410 --> 00:55:59,850
Not if I see you first.
1397
00:55:59,850 --> 00:56:03,850
(laughing)
he slays me.
1398
00:56:03,860 --> 00:56:05,310
Oh!
1399
00:56:07,780 --> 00:56:10,420
- What am I going to do?
- You know what to do.
1400
00:56:10,450 --> 00:56:11,740
Give the people what they want.
1401
00:56:11,770 --> 00:56:14,680
I can't. No.
Mike has enough on his plate.
1402
00:56:14,760 --> 00:56:17,270
Just ask him.
He's into you.
1403
00:56:17,340 --> 00:56:19,200
You think he's into me?
1404
00:56:19,280 --> 00:56:22,380
No. No, every celebrity
wants to spend their vacation
1405
00:56:22,460 --> 00:56:25,530
Handing out
cookies in a costume.
1406
00:56:25,600 --> 00:56:27,940
Don't tell me
you're not into him.
1407
00:56:27,970 --> 00:56:31,470
'kay, maybe I'm just
a little into him.
1408
00:56:31,550 --> 00:56:32,810
I love you, cuz.
1409
00:56:32,880 --> 00:56:35,640
But waiting for what
you want to find you is...
1410
00:56:35,720 --> 00:56:37,800
A waste.
1411
00:56:37,870 --> 00:56:39,780
You need to stop
hiding behind bella.
1412
00:56:39,820 --> 00:56:40,930
Take charge;
1413
00:56:40,970 --> 00:56:45,350
Could change your life
and sell tickets.
1414
00:56:45,390 --> 00:56:46,520
Okay!
1415
00:56:46,560 --> 00:56:48,410
- I will go for him.
- Yes!
1416
00:56:48,480 --> 00:56:50,580
Professionally.
1417
00:56:50,650 --> 00:56:51,830
Sure.
1418
00:56:51,900 --> 00:56:53,070
Oh, I put the drinks
1419
00:56:53,150 --> 00:56:54,750
And the omelet
on the company card.
1420
00:56:54,780 --> 00:56:57,200
- I hope that's okay.
- Yes.
1421
00:57:07,740 --> 00:57:09,740
Seeing aubri?
1422
00:57:09,810 --> 00:57:10,980
What makes you say that?
1423
00:57:11,010 --> 00:57:12,910
Since when do you wear cologne?
1424
00:57:12,950 --> 00:57:15,430
I always wear cologne.
1425
00:57:15,500 --> 00:57:17,140
Too much?
1426
00:57:17,170 --> 00:57:19,100
I have seen you
take a nap backstage
1427
00:57:19,100 --> 00:57:21,640
20 minutes before
a sketch with obama.
1428
00:57:21,680 --> 00:57:23,640
(sighing)
1429
00:57:23,680 --> 00:57:25,080
How are you nervous now?
1430
00:57:25,160 --> 00:57:26,650
She's great. I mean, she...
1431
00:57:26,760 --> 00:57:29,260
(sighing)
we have so much fun together.
1432
00:57:29,330 --> 00:57:33,490
She sees things in me I didn't
know anyone else could.
1433
00:57:33,520 --> 00:57:35,000
Good.
1434
00:57:35,040 --> 00:57:37,280
Show her who you really are,
1435
00:57:37,280 --> 00:57:39,870
Not some shameless,
non-committal bachelor
1436
00:57:39,950 --> 00:57:42,830
Those gossip blogs
make you out to be.
1437
00:57:42,860 --> 00:57:45,180
It's their words, not mine.
1438
00:57:45,220 --> 00:57:46,720
I appreciate you, steph.
1439
00:57:46,790 --> 00:57:48,610
You know that?
1440
00:57:48,690 --> 00:57:49,880
I know you do.
1441
00:57:49,880 --> 00:57:51,270
Now, don't screw this up.
1442
00:57:51,310 --> 00:57:52,460
Right.
1443
00:57:52,460 --> 00:57:53,920
Bring her something nice.
1444
00:57:55,710 --> 00:57:57,560
(sighing) okay.
1445
00:57:57,640 --> 00:57:59,710
Nice,
1446
00:57:59,790 --> 00:58:01,350
Not expensive.
1447
00:58:01,380 --> 00:58:03,430
Right.
1448
00:58:08,300 --> 00:58:10,150
- Hey.
- Hey.
1449
00:58:10,150 --> 00:58:13,320
Sorry I'm late. I was walking
over and saw this in a window.
1450
00:58:14,390 --> 00:58:17,050
It's beautiful.
1451
00:58:17,080 --> 00:58:19,210
To remind you of how you killed
it at the tree lighting.
1452
00:58:19,250 --> 00:58:20,990
It's a well-made item
and it reminded me of you.
1453
00:58:20,990 --> 00:58:22,080
I love it.
1454
00:58:22,090 --> 00:58:25,200
Shut up.
(chuckling)
1455
00:58:25,240 --> 00:58:26,760
- Shall we?
- Yeah.
1456
00:58:26,830 --> 00:58:30,010
Come on. Oh, it's
a microphone, by the way.
1457
00:58:30,090 --> 00:58:32,240
It's because you're
an amazing singer.
1458
00:58:32,320 --> 00:58:35,610
Wow. Beautiful.
1459
00:58:35,690 --> 00:58:38,050
Nice change of pace
from a comedy club.
1460
00:58:38,090 --> 00:58:40,550
I'm really glad you came
and not just tonight,
1461
00:58:40,590 --> 00:58:43,890
But to the comedy club.
1462
00:58:43,920 --> 00:58:46,590
You've made this
christmas pretty fun.
1463
00:58:46,670 --> 00:58:48,440
- Oh, yeah?
- You know that? Yeah.
1464
00:58:48,520 --> 00:58:49,730
Okay, maybe I should
get you an ornament,
1465
00:58:49,760 --> 00:58:51,190
So you won't forget it.
1466
00:58:51,190 --> 00:58:53,860
Ooh, I wonder
where I can get one
1467
00:58:53,860 --> 00:58:56,280
With a mob of children bringing
a grown man to tears.
1468
00:58:56,360 --> 00:58:58,250
Don't worry, it's gonna
haunt my dreams...
1469
00:58:58,290 --> 00:59:00,350
- Mine, too.
- ...For a very long time.
1470
00:59:00,420 --> 00:59:02,960
And besides,
who says I want to go back?
1471
00:59:03,030 --> 00:59:04,520
What are you going to do here?
1472
00:59:04,600 --> 00:59:06,430
As long bella's around,
I cannot promise you safety.
1473
00:59:06,460 --> 00:59:09,210
Oh, that's a very good point.
I could open up a b&b.
1474
00:59:09,210 --> 00:59:12,930
'b' for the iron bars I will
install on all the windows.
1475
00:59:12,970 --> 00:59:14,590
Of course.
1476
00:59:14,620 --> 00:59:17,310
But yeah, it sounds perfect
for when you retire.
1477
00:59:17,380 --> 00:59:20,590
Let's not forget you
have a movie career.
1478
00:59:20,590 --> 00:59:23,140
(chuckling)
1479
00:59:23,220 --> 00:59:26,770
It's been really awesome
being on stage again.
1480
00:59:26,800 --> 00:59:29,470
You know, near people
that are important to me.
1481
00:59:29,540 --> 00:59:31,770
Well, then,
that's where you belong.
1482
00:59:31,810 --> 00:59:35,990
It'll make a lot
of people really mad.
1483
00:59:36,070 --> 00:59:39,390
I think it would make
a lot more people happy.
1484
00:59:39,460 --> 00:59:42,950
Are you one of those people?
1485
00:59:42,980 --> 00:59:45,670
I just want what's best for you.
1486
00:59:45,740 --> 00:59:49,410
Most people want
something from me,
1487
00:59:49,410 --> 00:59:50,900
Not you.
1488
00:59:50,970 --> 00:59:53,080
Can I be honest?
1489
00:59:53,080 --> 00:59:54,490
Yeah. Yeah, of course.
1490
00:59:54,570 --> 00:59:56,880
Okay, I'm just gonna get it out.
1491
00:59:56,910 --> 01:00:00,520
The social media storm is
attracting a lot of attention,
1492
01:00:00,590 --> 01:00:03,470
A ton of industry people are
coming to the variety show.
1493
01:00:03,500 --> 01:00:05,000
Yeah, yeah. No, it's great.
1494
01:00:05,080 --> 01:00:06,470
I think my agent's
flying in with some.
1495
01:00:06,510 --> 01:00:09,490
Yeah, but we have
a ton of industry people
1496
01:00:09,530 --> 01:00:11,990
And no locals to laugh, clap,
or just enjoy the fun.
1497
01:00:12,030 --> 01:00:14,850
And well,
if I have a half-empty room,
1498
01:00:14,920 --> 01:00:16,510
Then bella's career
is finished,
1499
01:00:16,670 --> 01:00:19,850
And then mine just goes
down the drain with hers.
1500
01:00:19,930 --> 01:00:23,600
The tickets aren't selling,
and we really need a headliner,
1501
01:00:23,670 --> 01:00:25,280
And lot of people
are asking about you.
1502
01:00:25,280 --> 01:00:27,040
And would you just please make
my christmas wish?
1503
01:00:27,120 --> 01:00:28,620
Yes. Yes. Of course.
1504
01:00:28,620 --> 01:00:29,890
- Really?
- Yes.
1505
01:00:29,960 --> 01:00:31,310
It would be my pleasure.
1506
01:00:31,390 --> 01:00:34,870
So, can bella announce it
at the snowball social tonight?
1507
01:00:34,870 --> 01:00:36,440
I have your word?
1508
01:00:36,520 --> 01:00:38,630
Because if the audience
start rioting,
1509
01:00:38,630 --> 01:00:40,860
Then I'm actually
bella's designated human shield.
1510
01:00:40,890 --> 01:00:42,220
- Let's go sell some tickets.
- Yeah. Okay.
1511
01:00:42,290 --> 01:00:43,840
Yeah. I didn't think--
1512
01:00:43,920 --> 01:00:46,470
Come on. Let's do it.
For the snowball social!
1513
01:00:49,880 --> 01:00:53,900
♪ that christmas time feeling
1514
01:00:53,900 --> 01:00:55,850
♪ with family all around
1515
01:00:55,890 --> 01:00:57,310
♪ sleigh bells and the sound
1516
01:00:57,320 --> 01:00:59,080
Hi there, nutcracker.
1517
01:00:59,160 --> 01:01:01,110
You look beautiful.
1518
01:01:01,110 --> 01:01:05,050
Thank you.
And a reward for the compliment.
1519
01:01:05,050 --> 01:01:07,080
She comes at a price.
What is this?
1520
01:01:07,160 --> 01:01:08,720
- A walnut for you.
- What?
1521
01:01:08,750 --> 01:01:11,410
For me? Oh, my--
thank you so much for this.
1522
01:01:11,410 --> 01:01:12,740
Do you want me to eat this
right now?
1523
01:01:12,810 --> 01:01:14,500
You do. I just crack them.
1524
01:01:14,500 --> 01:01:16,000
Well, actually, it turns out
1525
01:01:16,000 --> 01:01:17,380
Walnuts are really tough
to crack.
1526
01:01:17,410 --> 01:01:19,840
Right. That makes sense.
1527
01:01:19,920 --> 01:01:21,250
And who are you supposed to be?
1528
01:01:21,320 --> 01:01:23,060
Jack frost, baby.
1529
01:01:23,100 --> 01:01:26,010
Handsome.
1530
01:01:26,010 --> 01:01:27,340
Not as functional
as a nutcracker.
1531
01:01:27,420 --> 01:01:29,190
A nutcracker. Obviously.
1532
01:01:29,260 --> 01:01:30,860
- But very handsome.
- Thank you.
1533
01:01:30,930 --> 01:01:32,440
- Aubri?
- Oh.
1534
01:01:32,520 --> 01:01:34,560
- Looks like I got to--
- your elf needs some help.
1535
01:01:34,590 --> 01:01:37,400
I got an elf to attend to. Okay.
1536
01:01:39,510 --> 01:01:40,840
Ian:
Well?
1537
01:01:40,920 --> 01:01:44,120
I thought you were supposed to
wear a costume.
1538
01:01:44,200 --> 01:01:45,750
Oh. Ha-ha. What'd he say?
1539
01:01:45,860 --> 01:01:48,030
He said yes.
1540
01:01:48,030 --> 01:01:49,870
He's going to headline.
1541
01:01:51,020 --> 01:01:53,770
Huh?
1542
01:01:53,850 --> 01:01:55,530
What if he said no?
1543
01:01:55,610 --> 01:01:58,620
I put it on the company card.
1544
01:01:58,620 --> 01:02:02,220
Ooh. I should probably
find bella so she can announce.
1545
01:02:02,300 --> 01:02:04,810
Oh. She actually texted me
saying she's running late.
1546
01:02:04,880 --> 01:02:07,370
She also asked me to save her
a slow dance.
1547
01:02:07,440 --> 01:02:08,590
(scoffing)
1548
01:02:08,630 --> 01:02:10,140
Think I learned my lesson about
encouraging older women.
1549
01:02:10,220 --> 01:02:12,110
Robert:
Why is mike baxter in a costume?
1550
01:02:12,150 --> 01:02:15,140
Is it true? Is mike baxter
headlining the variety show?
1551
01:02:15,140 --> 01:02:16,400
- I hope that's okay.
- Okay?
1552
01:02:16,480 --> 01:02:18,040
I was about to give away
free tickets
1553
01:02:18,070 --> 01:02:19,940
To the assisted living facility.
1554
01:02:19,970 --> 01:02:21,490
We'll announce it right before
1555
01:02:21,570 --> 01:02:23,290
The couples' snowball
spotlight dance. Thank you.
1556
01:02:23,330 --> 01:02:26,500
Well, I should
probably help ian.
1557
01:02:26,580 --> 01:02:29,460
Yeah, yeah. 'cause simple
addition does hurt my brain.
1558
01:02:29,500 --> 01:02:31,320
I think I'll be okay.
1559
01:02:31,390 --> 01:02:32,950
Go have fun.
1560
01:02:34,060 --> 01:02:35,910
Want to dance?
1561
01:02:45,740 --> 01:02:48,000
I think we might sell out
tonight, thanks to you.
1562
01:02:48,080 --> 01:02:49,650
What are you talking about?
Thanks to you.
1563
01:02:49,690 --> 01:02:52,190
Give yourself some credit.
You've been working hard.
1564
01:02:52,260 --> 01:02:53,760
The comedy club
belongs to bella.
1565
01:02:53,770 --> 01:02:56,340
I mean, without her, I wouldn't
even have a chance to write.
1566
01:02:56,420 --> 01:02:57,640
Mm-mmm. Not true.
1567
01:02:57,680 --> 01:02:59,600
You write because
that's who you are.
1568
01:03:01,090 --> 01:03:02,660
But to be honest,
from what I've seen,
1569
01:03:02,700 --> 01:03:05,480
You are so much more.
1570
01:03:09,170 --> 01:03:11,170
I think when bella eventually
1571
01:03:11,210 --> 01:03:13,540
Introduces me
to her industry friends,
1572
01:03:13,620 --> 01:03:16,200
Then I can finally make
that leap.
1573
01:03:17,680 --> 01:03:20,050
Okay. I had a mentor once
who told me
1574
01:03:20,120 --> 01:03:22,110
That it's a very dangerous thing
1575
01:03:22,220 --> 01:03:26,860
To put your entire destiny
in someone else's hands.
1576
01:03:26,940 --> 01:03:28,800
You don't need bella's help.
1577
01:03:28,800 --> 01:03:30,470
You didn't have any help?
1578
01:03:30,540 --> 01:03:34,640
You said the variety show
gave you your first big break.
1579
01:03:34,640 --> 01:03:35,900
A talent scout saw you.
1580
01:03:35,970 --> 01:03:37,230
Oh, he did,
but he was only there
1581
01:03:37,310 --> 01:03:38,700
Because I sent him the tickets.
1582
01:03:38,740 --> 01:03:41,130
I e-mailed to make sure that
he got the tickets,
1583
01:03:41,200 --> 01:03:43,310
And called repeatedly to
make sure that he got the e-mail
1584
01:03:43,310 --> 01:03:44,800
To make sure that he got
the tickets,
1585
01:03:44,880 --> 01:03:46,970
And I did the same thing
for about 15 others.
1586
01:03:47,040 --> 01:03:48,360
One showed up.
1587
01:03:48,400 --> 01:03:49,990
- Really?
- Yes.
1588
01:03:49,990 --> 01:03:51,550
- Look at you.
- Mm-hmm?
1589
01:03:51,580 --> 01:03:52,880
- Still obnoxious.
- Mm-hmm?
1590
01:03:52,920 --> 01:03:54,070
About to be a superhero.
1591
01:03:54,140 --> 01:03:56,830
Well, I mean,
the jury is still out on that.
1592
01:03:56,830 --> 01:03:59,000
I won't know
until after christmas.
1593
01:03:59,000 --> 01:04:00,910
And what are you doing
for christmas?
1594
01:04:00,980 --> 01:04:04,170
Well, after the show,
probably a very exciting night.
1595
01:04:04,170 --> 01:04:05,210
Watering my plants.
1596
01:04:05,250 --> 01:04:06,840
- Sorting my mail.
- Very exciting.
1597
01:04:06,840 --> 01:04:11,600
Unless you'd want to spend
christmas together.
1598
01:04:11,680 --> 01:04:14,180
But it'll be your fault
if my plants die.
1599
01:04:14,180 --> 01:04:15,440
Ladies and gentlemen,
1600
01:04:15,470 --> 01:04:17,610
Our couples' spotlight
snowball dance
1601
01:04:17,610 --> 01:04:19,070
Is about to start.
1602
01:04:19,110 --> 01:04:21,060
But before the romance gets
started, our costume friends
1603
01:04:21,090 --> 01:04:22,910
From the comedy club
have a huge announcement
1604
01:04:22,950 --> 01:04:24,410
About the closing
of the christmas fest.
1605
01:04:24,410 --> 01:04:25,560
You can tell me later.
1606
01:04:25,600 --> 01:04:27,190
So, I know a lot of you know
1607
01:04:27,190 --> 01:04:30,010
That we've had a special guest
here over the holidays.
1608
01:04:30,090 --> 01:04:32,070
Let me get the team up
from the comedy club
1609
01:04:32,110 --> 01:04:33,860
To tell us more.
Uh, is bella here?
1610
01:04:33,940 --> 01:04:35,260
No, but aubri is here.
1611
01:04:35,260 --> 01:04:36,350
What?
1612
01:04:36,430 --> 01:04:38,580
Aubri wilson, come on down.
1613
01:04:38,610 --> 01:04:40,750
(cheering and applause)
1614
01:04:43,920 --> 01:04:45,120
Hello.
1615
01:04:45,130 --> 01:04:46,870
As I'm sure some of you
have noticed,
1616
01:04:46,900 --> 01:04:50,120
We've added a new headliner
to our variety show.
1617
01:04:50,200 --> 01:04:51,550
Patrons:
Yeah?
1618
01:04:51,630 --> 01:04:54,980
So, I am pleased to announce
that...
1619
01:04:55,050 --> 01:04:57,290
...Mike baxter
will be performing.
1620
01:04:57,360 --> 01:04:58,850
(cheering and applause)
1621
01:04:58,960 --> 01:05:02,270
Thank you so much, aubri,
darling.
1622
01:05:02,300 --> 01:05:05,300
Aubri, my assistant, everybody.
1623
01:05:05,310 --> 01:05:07,340
Thank you, darling. Thank you.
1624
01:05:07,420 --> 01:05:10,210
Okay. Please help me bring
to the stage
1625
01:05:10,240 --> 01:05:13,990
The comedy club's
superstar comic
1626
01:05:13,990 --> 01:05:15,500
And our christmas headliner,
1627
01:05:15,530 --> 01:05:17,230
Mike baxter!
1628
01:05:17,270 --> 01:05:19,740
Okay. Here we go. Here we go.
Here we go.
1629
01:05:19,740 --> 01:05:21,950
Here we go.
Here we go. Here we go.
1630
01:05:23,620 --> 01:05:25,010
Thank you.
1631
01:05:25,080 --> 01:05:28,230
Mike, we are so thrilled
to have you performing,
1632
01:05:28,310 --> 01:05:30,750
And of course, I'll be hosting.
The dynamic duo.
1633
01:05:30,830 --> 01:05:32,240
Right, folks?
1634
01:05:32,320 --> 01:05:36,470
Okay. Now, don't forget.
Pick your tickets up tonight,
1635
01:05:36,470 --> 01:05:38,640
Because we are selling out
so fast.
1636
01:05:38,670 --> 01:05:39,990
Oh, yeah.
1637
01:05:40,020 --> 01:05:42,010
The hottest show in town
is only three days away.
1638
01:05:42,020 --> 01:05:43,390
Please make sure
you get your tickets
1639
01:05:43,430 --> 01:05:44,920
From the table in the back,
1640
01:05:45,000 --> 01:05:46,440
And why don't we get
mr. And mrs. Jack frost
1641
01:05:46,440 --> 01:05:48,180
To kick off
this snowball spotlight dance?
1642
01:05:48,260 --> 01:05:51,570
That the ice queen to you,
darling.
1643
01:05:51,570 --> 01:05:54,170
But I will accept the spotlight.
1644
01:05:54,200 --> 01:05:55,570
Mike?
1645
01:05:57,520 --> 01:05:59,070
Bella?
1646
01:06:03,710 --> 01:06:05,180
♪ if you say
1647
01:06:05,220 --> 01:06:07,380
Bella:
I'm so glad you're helping me.
1648
01:06:07,460 --> 01:06:09,960
Thanks, bella. Appreciate that.
And you spin...
1649
01:06:09,960 --> 01:06:12,520
♪ your last goodbye
1650
01:06:12,560 --> 01:06:17,540
♪ and I knew you were
going away ♪
1651
01:06:17,620 --> 01:06:19,010
I'm not keeping you, am I?
1652
01:06:20,680 --> 01:06:23,080
- Want some good news?
- Sure.
1653
01:06:23,160 --> 01:06:25,810
Tickets are sold out.
The vip section is full.
1654
01:06:25,810 --> 01:06:28,370
It's going to be a packed house
on christmas eve.
1655
01:06:28,400 --> 01:06:31,770
- You did it.
- We did it.
1656
01:06:31,810 --> 01:06:33,670
They should get
a fantastic show.
1657
01:06:33,740 --> 01:06:35,260
Tomorrow, we celebrate.
1658
01:06:35,340 --> 01:06:38,080
Oh, no. No, no, no.
I have to write.
1659
01:06:38,160 --> 01:06:39,990
Christmas eve
is three days away,
1660
01:06:39,990 --> 01:06:42,230
And bella is going to
need jokes.
1661
01:06:42,310 --> 01:06:44,330
What about mike?
1662
01:06:44,330 --> 01:06:45,550
(laughing)
1663
01:06:45,590 --> 01:06:47,060
You know, I am going to need
an opening act.
1664
01:06:47,090 --> 01:06:48,570
Jack frost and the ice queen
1665
01:06:48,650 --> 01:06:50,920
Are a better fit
than the nutcracker.
1666
01:06:52,490 --> 01:06:54,210
Thank you for everything.
1667
01:07:06,500 --> 01:07:09,460
(phone ringing)
1668
01:07:09,540 --> 01:07:10,900
Hello?
1669
01:07:10,930 --> 01:07:13,920
Mike, you're not still out in,
what was it, dakota, are you?
1670
01:07:13,950 --> 01:07:16,850
Uh, outside chicago.
Our third largest city.
1671
01:07:16,930 --> 01:07:18,090
Right. Well, listen.
1672
01:07:18,170 --> 01:07:19,670
I was watching the sunrise
this morning,
1673
01:07:19,710 --> 01:07:20,850
And I couldn't help but notice
1674
01:07:20,920 --> 01:07:22,780
That you weren't outside
crowing.
1675
01:07:24,980 --> 01:07:26,050
What?
1676
01:07:26,130 --> 01:07:27,160
Crowing.
1677
01:07:27,160 --> 01:07:29,110
Sunrise. It's what roosters do.
1678
01:07:29,190 --> 01:07:32,020
Yes. Thank you, damon. I know.
What's happening?
1679
01:07:32,100 --> 01:07:34,650
- Did I get the part?
- Yes. You got it.
1680
01:07:34,730 --> 01:07:37,790
What I'm trying to say is
you are officially the rooster!
1681
01:07:37,870 --> 01:07:39,800
Well, actually, I'm rooster man.
1682
01:07:39,880 --> 01:07:41,430
Exactly. Listen.
They called this morning.
1683
01:07:41,430 --> 01:07:43,080
I'm working on a deal
right now.
1684
01:07:43,110 --> 01:07:46,950
But you are a man of the people.
You sealed the deal!
1685
01:07:46,980 --> 01:07:48,350
Congrats.
1686
01:07:50,620 --> 01:07:52,230
Congrats.
1687
01:07:53,400 --> 01:07:54,900
Mikey, didn't you hear me?
1688
01:07:54,900 --> 01:07:56,730
Did my assistant drop the call?
'cause if he did, I swear--
1689
01:07:56,730 --> 01:07:59,110
- Brandon!
- No, no. I'm here.
1690
01:07:59,150 --> 01:08:00,670
Hey.
Can I call you back?
1691
01:08:00,750 --> 01:08:03,490
I have to finish writing my act
for the variety show.
1692
01:08:03,570 --> 01:08:05,620
Wait, wait, wait. You're not
still performing, are you?
1693
01:08:05,650 --> 01:08:07,240
We need you back in la, asap.
1694
01:08:07,250 --> 01:08:09,060
They need to scan your feet
for the prosthetics.
1695
01:08:09,140 --> 01:08:11,320
I can't. I'm headlining.
1696
01:08:11,360 --> 01:08:13,080
No, mike. You don't understand.
You have to be back in la.
1697
01:08:13,080 --> 01:08:14,630
They're doing
a whole song and dance
1698
01:08:14,660 --> 01:08:16,140
At one of those conventions.
1699
01:08:16,250 --> 01:08:17,920
You know, the ones
where the geeks get together
1700
01:08:17,920 --> 01:08:19,130
And watch trailers?
1701
01:08:19,170 --> 01:08:21,740
I just, um--
1702
01:08:21,820 --> 01:08:24,600
I need a bit of time
to think about this.
1703
01:08:24,680 --> 01:08:25,850
No. There's no time.
1704
01:08:25,930 --> 01:08:27,250
My assistant booked you a flight
christmas eve.
1705
01:08:27,320 --> 01:08:28,930
Hell send you the details.
1706
01:08:28,930 --> 01:08:31,980
- I'm committed to the club.
- Mike, they will understand.
1707
01:08:32,010 --> 01:08:33,530
This is a franchise, mikey.
1708
01:08:33,600 --> 01:08:36,420
We're talking about
action figures and bedsheets.
1709
01:08:36,500 --> 01:08:38,480
A whole lot of people
are counting on you with this.
1710
01:08:38,520 --> 01:08:41,650
Maybe this isn't the right move
for me.
1711
01:08:41,690 --> 01:08:44,010
Oh, yes, it is. Listen.
1712
01:08:44,040 --> 01:08:46,190
I will personally bring you
the contract myself.
1713
01:08:46,270 --> 01:08:47,780
I'm on my way.
1714
01:08:47,790 --> 01:08:49,050
Brandon! Are you there?
1715
01:08:49,130 --> 01:08:51,940
Listen, brandon.
Book me a flight out to, um--
1716
01:08:51,940 --> 01:08:53,200
Where is this place?
1717
01:08:53,270 --> 01:08:56,020
No, damon. You really don't need
to come here.
1718
01:08:56,050 --> 01:08:58,220
Listen, mikey. Listen to me.
Two words, okay?
1719
01:08:58,300 --> 01:08:59,550
Whole grains.
1720
01:08:59,550 --> 01:09:00,890
- Damon--
- I'll see you soon.
1721
01:09:00,970 --> 01:09:02,760
Damon?
1722
01:09:09,900 --> 01:09:11,320
It's going to be a big night.
1723
01:09:11,350 --> 01:09:12,380
At the very least,
1724
01:09:12,460 --> 01:09:14,460
An expensive one.
Bella asked for
1725
01:09:14,540 --> 01:09:15,980
Last-minute decorations.
1726
01:09:15,980 --> 01:09:19,300
But did give me my
christmas bonus, so it's a wash.
1727
01:09:19,380 --> 01:09:21,900
She gave me one, too.
Now, I remember why I started
1728
01:09:21,980 --> 01:09:23,900
Encouraging older women
in the first place.
1729
01:09:23,970 --> 01:09:26,160
This is good stuff.
1730
01:09:26,240 --> 01:09:27,450
It can't be all for bella.
1731
01:09:27,480 --> 01:09:28,880
It's my idea book.
1732
01:09:28,920 --> 01:09:31,060
I write anything
and everything in it.
1733
01:09:31,140 --> 01:09:32,970
Then you should perform it.
1734
01:09:33,010 --> 01:09:35,210
You have enough material there.
1735
01:09:35,210 --> 01:09:36,540
I'm a writer.
1736
01:09:36,540 --> 01:09:38,910
Besides, anytime I was good,
mike was up there with me.
1737
01:09:38,950 --> 01:09:40,670
- Hi.
- Hi.
1738
01:09:40,670 --> 01:09:43,230
I'm damon cardona.
I represent mike baxter.
1739
01:09:43,270 --> 01:09:44,660
Are you the cleaning staff?
1740
01:09:44,730 --> 01:09:46,830
Among other things.
You're early for the show.
1741
01:09:46,870 --> 01:09:48,540
No, I'm not here for the show.
1742
01:09:48,570 --> 01:09:50,420
I'm only here to pick up mike.
Is he around?
1743
01:09:50,500 --> 01:09:51,560
Uh, picking up?
1744
01:09:51,590 --> 01:09:53,130
Yeah. I'd love to
get to the o'hare
1745
01:09:53,130 --> 01:09:54,530
Before the diamond lounge
fills up.
1746
01:09:54,560 --> 01:09:56,040
I'm sorry.
1747
01:09:56,120 --> 01:10:00,010
I haven't talked to mike
in the last day. He's leaving?
1748
01:10:00,080 --> 01:10:02,100
Oh, you guys must not read up
on the trades.
1749
01:10:02,180 --> 01:10:05,090
Okay. Look, then.
Mike booked rooster man.
1750
01:10:05,120 --> 01:10:07,520
So, he has to go back to la
for press.
1751
01:10:07,600 --> 01:10:10,370
You know, I got to thank you,
because those viral videos
1752
01:10:10,370 --> 01:10:13,040
Helped us cross the finish line.
They were amazing.
1753
01:10:13,040 --> 01:10:14,610
- Hi, damon.
- Ah.
1754
01:10:14,690 --> 01:10:16,460
I told you I would be here.
Listen.
1755
01:10:16,540 --> 01:10:17,920
I could not let you miss
an opportunity.
1756
01:10:17,950 --> 01:10:19,690
So, I have a car in the back.
1757
01:10:19,770 --> 01:10:21,300
If you hurry up, you can get
that champagne service.
1758
01:10:21,380 --> 01:10:22,800
Damon, I'm going
to meet you outside.
1759
01:10:22,880 --> 01:10:24,640
- Okay?
- Right.
1760
01:10:24,720 --> 01:10:27,240
Well, good meeting you.
Merry christmas.
1761
01:10:27,320 --> 01:10:31,050
And, uh, don't take too long.
1762
01:10:32,580 --> 01:10:35,810
I, uh, think I left my oven on.
I'm going to--
1763
01:10:38,910 --> 01:10:40,510
You got the part.
1764
01:10:40,590 --> 01:10:42,610
I wanted to tell you, but
I wasn't sure about taking it.
1765
01:10:42,720 --> 01:10:45,540
Okay?
I needed some time to think.
1766
01:10:45,580 --> 01:10:46,880
And did you?
1767
01:10:46,910 --> 01:10:48,650
You could have told me
before damon did.
1768
01:10:48,720 --> 01:10:50,740
I needed to figure out
what I was going to do first.
1769
01:10:50,740 --> 01:10:52,300
And what you figured out
was leaving me here
1770
01:10:52,410 --> 01:10:54,750
Without a headliner? Just
backing out at the last minute?
1771
01:10:54,830 --> 01:10:56,000
It's complicated.
1772
01:10:56,070 --> 01:10:58,370
And that's why I came over here,
to tell you in person.
1773
01:10:58,410 --> 01:11:01,600
I didn't think damon
was going to find you first.
1774
01:11:01,680 --> 01:11:04,270
This has been in the works
for such a long time.
1775
01:11:04,380 --> 01:11:05,740
I don't have a choice.
1776
01:11:05,820 --> 01:11:07,270
You do, and you made it.
1777
01:11:07,350 --> 01:11:09,020
You don't understand.
People rely on me
1778
01:11:09,090 --> 01:11:10,740
Doing this movie.
1779
01:11:10,820 --> 01:11:13,500
The studio can crush you.
1780
01:11:13,580 --> 01:11:15,560
Somebody told me that
it is a dangerous thing
1781
01:11:15,560 --> 01:11:17,680
To leave your destiny
in other people's hands.
1782
01:11:19,980 --> 01:11:21,350
I'm sorry.
1783
01:11:23,000 --> 01:11:24,820
Trust me.
It wasn't an easy decision.
1784
01:11:26,620 --> 01:11:27,690
Listen to me.
1785
01:11:27,720 --> 01:11:29,900
You don't need me for the show.
1786
01:11:31,370 --> 01:11:32,950
Okay? You've got the talent.
1787
01:11:32,950 --> 01:11:34,950
The tickets are sold.
1788
01:11:35,030 --> 01:11:36,490
It's going to be
a success no matter what.
1789
01:11:36,530 --> 01:11:39,980
Yeah. It will be a success.
Thank you.
1790
01:11:40,060 --> 01:11:42,270
Aubri, this is your time.
1791
01:11:42,350 --> 01:11:46,070
And it's your time to be a hero
on the big screen.
1792
01:11:46,150 --> 01:11:47,810
Congratulations.
1793
01:11:47,890 --> 01:11:49,800
Aubri, you're a star.
1794
01:11:49,800 --> 01:11:51,470
You shine on your own.
1795
01:11:53,680 --> 01:11:55,140
Merry christmas, mike.
1796
01:12:06,510 --> 01:12:08,130
We don't have a headliner now?
1797
01:12:08,160 --> 01:12:10,390
None of the acts want to
replace mike.
1798
01:12:10,470 --> 01:12:12,010
He set the expectations
too high.
1799
01:12:12,090 --> 01:12:14,240
Yeah. You set your expectations
too high
1800
01:12:14,240 --> 01:12:16,920
When you put your faith in
that... That sellout.
1801
01:12:16,990 --> 01:12:19,840
And how much is he making
for that movie?
1802
01:12:19,870 --> 01:12:21,760
Four or five mil?
1803
01:12:21,760 --> 01:12:24,430
Okay. I have a great set.
Maybe you can close.
1804
01:12:24,500 --> 01:12:27,560
Yeah, or maybe you can get
that magician you hired
1805
01:12:27,600 --> 01:12:29,590
To saw me in half.
1806
01:12:31,410 --> 01:12:33,340
The crowd wants to see
the headliner.
1807
01:12:33,420 --> 01:12:35,750
They're not going to happy
until they do.
1808
01:12:35,790 --> 01:12:37,060
And an unhappy crowd,
1809
01:12:37,090 --> 01:12:38,260
They don't laugh.
1810
01:12:38,330 --> 01:12:39,920
What are the vips
going to think?
1811
01:12:40,000 --> 01:12:44,250
Oh, I cannot believe
this is happening to me again!
1812
01:12:44,330 --> 01:12:45,400
Bella, they're your friends.
1813
01:12:45,430 --> 01:12:46,950
Friends don't forget about you.
1814
01:12:46,980 --> 01:12:48,110
Friends don't ignore your calls.
1815
01:12:48,180 --> 01:12:50,370
Friends broker
your million-dollar deals,
1816
01:12:50,440 --> 01:12:52,970
Not advertisements
for battery acid
1817
01:12:53,050 --> 01:12:55,280
Thinly disguised as soda pop.
1818
01:12:55,360 --> 01:12:57,430
(sighing)
1819
01:12:57,460 --> 01:13:00,960
Looks like we're going to
crash and burn together.
1820
01:13:01,040 --> 01:13:02,960
And you don't deserve that,
aubri.
1821
01:13:04,620 --> 01:13:06,080
I'll do it.
1822
01:13:06,120 --> 01:13:07,970
What, crash and burn?
1823
01:13:08,050 --> 01:13:09,440
I just said we'll do it
together.
1824
01:13:09,470 --> 01:13:10,690
Headline.
1825
01:13:10,720 --> 01:13:12,590
The people in town,
they've seen me perform.
1826
01:13:12,670 --> 01:13:13,840
I have a ton of followers.
1827
01:13:13,880 --> 01:13:15,560
And I got us in this situation,
1828
01:13:15,640 --> 01:13:17,150
And I'm going to get us
out of it.
1829
01:13:17,230 --> 01:13:20,210
Honey, they're not going to be a
very forgiving crowd.
1830
01:13:20,290 --> 01:13:24,350
I am not going to let them
break me, okay? I will do it.
1831
01:13:24,390 --> 01:13:26,900
Okay. I'm just going
to tell you,
1832
01:13:26,900 --> 01:13:30,220
As much as I want to see you
succeed out there,
1833
01:13:30,260 --> 01:13:31,560
Just as much
I don't want you to,
1834
01:13:31,670 --> 01:13:33,660
Because I don't want to
lose you.
1835
01:13:33,740 --> 01:13:35,150
Impossible.
1836
01:13:35,220 --> 01:13:36,910
As if you could ever lose me.
1837
01:13:36,910 --> 01:13:38,870
I'm only here because of you,
and...
1838
01:13:40,410 --> 01:13:42,660
...You'll always be home to me,
bella.
1839
01:13:42,660 --> 01:13:44,240
You're brave.
1840
01:13:44,390 --> 01:13:48,410
Aubri, you belong
on center stage.
1841
01:13:48,490 --> 01:13:51,600
I want you to go out there
and claim it.
1842
01:13:51,670 --> 01:13:54,080
- (chuckling)
- (knocking on door)
1843
01:13:54,230 --> 01:13:56,190
Five minutes till show time.
1844
01:13:56,270 --> 01:14:00,390
Oh. There she is.
The star that saved christmas.
1845
01:14:02,250 --> 01:14:04,390
And you?
You're the little dipper.
1846
01:14:06,530 --> 01:14:07,940
Does that mean--
1847
01:14:07,940 --> 01:14:09,270
I--
1848
01:14:09,270 --> 01:14:13,100
I, uh, think
I may have just blacked out.
1849
01:14:13,180 --> 01:14:14,490
Ooh. Okay. Uh--
1850
01:14:20,110 --> 01:14:21,860
Can you stop celebrating
so loudly?
1851
01:14:21,860 --> 01:14:24,410
The girls are trying to
take a nap.
1852
01:14:26,700 --> 01:14:29,530
I thought a comeback
would make me happy.
1853
01:14:29,610 --> 01:14:31,190
But christmas eve,
having to leave you
1854
01:14:31,270 --> 01:14:33,130
And the girls, and--
1855
01:14:36,510 --> 01:14:39,130
Look. You know me.
I wouldn't do this
1856
01:14:39,200 --> 01:14:40,460
If I didn't have a choice.
1857
01:14:40,540 --> 01:14:42,390
But you do.
1858
01:14:44,180 --> 01:14:45,520
Well, you always have a choice.
1859
01:14:45,550 --> 01:14:47,810
I'm proud of you
no matter what you do.
1860
01:14:47,810 --> 01:14:49,720
I just want you to be happy.
1861
01:14:49,800 --> 01:14:51,310
(car horn honking)
1862
01:14:51,390 --> 01:14:53,980
Ah, forgive me for saying this,
but I do not like that man.
1863
01:14:53,980 --> 01:14:56,320
Yeah. That makes two of us.
1864
01:14:56,320 --> 01:14:58,730
(zipper rasping)
1865
01:14:58,810 --> 01:15:01,480
I'm so proud of you.
1866
01:15:01,590 --> 01:15:03,900
- I love you.
- I love you.
1867
01:15:03,940 --> 01:15:06,260
Go follow your heart.
1868
01:15:06,340 --> 01:15:08,320
(horn honking)
1869
01:15:08,360 --> 01:15:11,000
Or whatever you have to do
to make that man leave.
1870
01:15:15,850 --> 01:15:18,080
So, they've already sent
some pr briefs.
1871
01:15:18,160 --> 01:15:20,680
So, if anyone asks, you've read
the comics your whole life
1872
01:15:20,680 --> 01:15:22,550
And you can sleep in
a chicken coop.
1873
01:15:24,510 --> 01:15:25,440
Okay?
1874
01:15:25,440 --> 01:15:27,980
Damon, when do
I get to be myself?
1875
01:15:29,410 --> 01:15:32,260
This is yourself,
only richer and hire-able.
1876
01:15:32,340 --> 01:15:33,580
(chuckling)
1877
01:15:33,620 --> 01:15:35,110
(sighing)
1878
01:15:36,110 --> 01:15:37,240
Damon:
What is that?
1879
01:15:37,240 --> 01:15:41,030
Are those--
1880
01:15:41,030 --> 01:15:43,070
- Hey. It's not a--
- let me see. What is this?
1881
01:15:43,110 --> 01:15:45,610
Mikey, I said whole grains.
1882
01:15:45,690 --> 01:15:47,910
I wasn't going to eat
the whole thing.
1883
01:15:48,930 --> 01:15:51,120
Here. Have some walnuts.
1884
01:15:57,380 --> 01:15:59,840
Okay. You know what?
You don't want the walnuts?
1885
01:15:59,840 --> 01:16:01,030
You don't like them?
1886
01:16:01,110 --> 01:16:02,550
How about this?
1887
01:16:02,550 --> 01:16:04,450
We can get you something else
at the airport, okay?
1888
01:16:04,480 --> 01:16:05,830
I don't need to come back
on top.
1889
01:16:05,910 --> 01:16:07,380
I don't.
1890
01:16:07,420 --> 01:16:11,500
I want to make people happy
again, in my own way.
1891
01:16:11,580 --> 01:16:12,820
Take these and have these.
1892
01:16:12,820 --> 01:16:14,170
We can put the abs on you
in post.
1893
01:16:14,250 --> 01:16:16,040
- No. Damon--
- you can eat whatever you want.
1894
01:16:16,080 --> 01:16:18,440
Damon, I got to follow my heart.
Listen to me.
1895
01:16:18,480 --> 01:16:21,720
We're going to make this living
a very happy and lucrative one.
1896
01:16:21,800 --> 01:16:24,820
Okay? Trust me.
Stop the car, please.
1897
01:16:24,890 --> 01:16:26,130
No, no, no. Don't stop the car.
1898
01:16:26,170 --> 01:16:28,580
Please don't do this.
It's christmas.
1899
01:16:28,650 --> 01:16:30,100
We're talking action figures,
mikey.
1900
01:16:30,170 --> 01:16:31,540
Excuse me. Stop the car.
1901
01:16:32,580 --> 01:16:33,790
(sighing)
1902
01:16:33,830 --> 01:16:35,540
Just drive.
1903
01:16:35,620 --> 01:16:37,180
Action figures, mikey.
Bedsheets.
1904
01:16:37,250 --> 01:16:38,300
Stop the car.
1905
01:16:38,330 --> 01:16:41,760
Damon... Eat a pastry.
1906
01:16:41,760 --> 01:16:43,010
Damon: Mike, don't do this.
1907
01:16:43,090 --> 01:16:45,640
Trust me.
1908
01:16:45,670 --> 01:16:47,470
(sighing)
1909
01:16:49,370 --> 01:16:50,390
(audience applauding)
1910
01:16:50,430 --> 01:16:52,590
I have been naughty all year,
1911
01:16:52,630 --> 01:16:54,860
Just to save poor santa
the trip.
1912
01:16:54,940 --> 01:16:58,760
But really, it's a wonderful
life, isn't it, folks?
1913
01:16:58,840 --> 01:17:01,690
And we've been blessed this year
with a white christmas.
1914
01:17:01,760 --> 01:17:04,270
And we're not home alone.
We're all here together,
1915
01:17:04,350 --> 01:17:07,440
With a great christmas,
warm spirit,
1916
01:17:07,480 --> 01:17:11,450
Ready to enjoy the first
christmas variety concert
1917
01:17:11,460 --> 01:17:13,580
That the comedy club
has put on in years.
1918
01:17:13,620 --> 01:17:17,720
- (cheering and applause)
- yes, yes!
1919
01:17:17,800 --> 01:17:19,640
Okay.
1920
01:17:19,710 --> 01:17:20,700
You got this, cuz.
1921
01:17:20,770 --> 01:17:22,560
Yeah.
They're either going to love me
1922
01:17:22,630 --> 01:17:25,450
Or they're going to hate me.
Oh, they're going to hate me.
1923
01:17:25,530 --> 01:17:27,780
They're going to love you.
1924
01:17:27,810 --> 01:17:29,030
This is your destiny.
1925
01:17:29,060 --> 01:17:30,550
I knew it back then in
the tree house,
1926
01:17:30,580 --> 01:17:32,170
And I know it now.
1927
01:17:32,240 --> 01:17:35,170
So, get out there and make them
laugh on christmas.
1928
01:17:35,250 --> 01:17:37,170
Bella: Get ready for
a big christmas surprise.
1929
01:17:37,170 --> 01:17:40,110
Now, please,
put your hands together
1930
01:17:40,110 --> 01:17:43,540
And help me welcome to the stage
our very own funny lady,
1931
01:17:43,580 --> 01:17:46,240
The real queen of christmas...
1932
01:17:46,240 --> 01:17:48,310
Are you ready to drop
the curtain if I faint? Please.
1933
01:17:48,380 --> 01:17:50,700
...Aubri wilson. Aubri?
1934
01:17:50,740 --> 01:17:52,090
(cheering and applause)
1935
01:17:52,160 --> 01:17:53,390
Get up here.
1936
01:17:53,420 --> 01:17:56,330
(applauding continues)
1937
01:17:58,410 --> 01:18:02,910
We are going to have
"snow" much fun.
1938
01:18:02,990 --> 01:18:04,840
Get up here and slay them.
1939
01:18:07,420 --> 01:18:10,000
This is the nicest
she has ever been to me.
1940
01:18:10,070 --> 01:18:12,140
I don't know what was in
that eggnog.
1941
01:18:12,140 --> 01:18:13,260
(laughing)
1942
01:18:13,330 --> 01:18:15,330
Hello, hello!
1943
01:18:15,410 --> 01:18:17,410
Let's give it up
for bella deldomino. Yes.
1944
01:18:17,450 --> 01:18:19,110
Thank you.
1945
01:18:19,190 --> 01:18:20,560
Full house tonight.
1946
01:18:20,570 --> 01:18:24,010
Wow. Um, yeah. It's here.
December. I know.
1947
01:18:24,090 --> 01:18:28,170
Yeah. I can already sense
the stress levels rising.
1948
01:18:28,210 --> 01:18:32,680
Yeah. The most wonderful time
of the year.
1949
01:18:32,760 --> 01:18:34,120
You know,
when all your loved ones
1950
01:18:34,120 --> 01:18:37,030
Are so close together
under one roof.
1951
01:18:37,070 --> 01:18:38,450
(audience members laughing)
1952
01:18:38,530 --> 01:18:40,130
You know, it's great.
I love christmas.
1953
01:18:40,210 --> 01:18:41,250
It is my favorite holiday.
1954
01:18:41,290 --> 01:18:42,940
And of course,
I love my mother.
1955
01:18:42,940 --> 01:18:44,200
Okay?
1956
01:18:44,280 --> 01:18:47,530
Yes, she makes my life
a little difficult at times.
1957
01:18:47,610 --> 01:18:49,260
There's one thing about her
1958
01:18:49,300 --> 01:18:51,450
That just really grinds
my gears, and that is that
1959
01:18:51,480 --> 01:18:54,900
This angel woman is just
impossible to buy presents for.
1960
01:18:54,980 --> 01:18:57,100
So, this year, I just gave up.
1961
01:18:57,140 --> 01:18:58,910
I said,
"mother, please just tell me
1962
01:18:58,990 --> 01:19:01,560
What you want for christmas,
and I will just buy it for you."
1963
01:19:01,640 --> 01:19:03,170
She finally told me,
but you know,
1964
01:19:03,170 --> 01:19:06,390
I can't for the life me
find it anywhere.
1965
01:19:06,430 --> 01:19:07,740
So, if any of you know
1966
01:19:07,810 --> 01:19:10,730
Where I can find
better health insurance,
1967
01:19:10,810 --> 01:19:13,210
Please see me after the show.
1968
01:19:13,210 --> 01:19:15,470
(laughing, applauding)
1969
01:19:15,500 --> 01:19:16,800
Yeah.
1970
01:19:16,810 --> 01:19:18,640
I mean, have you ever looked at
your insurance policy?
1971
01:19:18,640 --> 01:19:21,250
I mean, those things, they are
longer than a christmas carol.
1972
01:19:21,250 --> 01:19:22,920
You are in trouble.
I mean, it's madness.
1973
01:19:22,920 --> 01:19:27,010
It's like trying to decipher
an ancient scroll.
1974
01:19:27,090 --> 01:19:28,680
Anyways, I didn't give up,
1975
01:19:28,760 --> 01:19:30,990
Because I am
a very good daughter.
1976
01:19:31,020 --> 01:19:32,590
So, I just kept looking
1977
01:19:32,600 --> 01:19:33,800
Here and there.
1978
01:19:33,840 --> 01:19:35,260
I looked so hard
that I actually...
1979
01:19:35,290 --> 01:19:36,530
(clearing throat)
1980
01:19:36,610 --> 01:19:39,060
...Ended up spraining my ankle
looking for it.
1981
01:19:39,090 --> 01:19:40,840
- Audience member: Oh, no.
- Or at least I think I did.
1982
01:19:40,920 --> 01:19:43,840
I was too afraid to go to
the hospital to find out.
1983
01:19:43,920 --> 01:19:48,280
(laughing, applauding)
1984
01:19:58,530 --> 01:20:00,080
Mike baxter.
1985
01:20:03,880 --> 01:20:05,290
(cheering and applause)
1986
01:20:06,690 --> 01:20:09,550
Aubri:
Too hard. Um...
1987
01:20:11,180 --> 01:20:13,010
Mike baxter.
1988
01:20:14,960 --> 01:20:18,470
You came back. Why?
1989
01:20:22,270 --> 01:20:25,240
I realized the only comeback
I care about
1990
01:20:25,320 --> 01:20:27,220
Is to the one person
that matters to me.
1991
01:20:27,300 --> 01:20:29,880
Audience members:
Aw.
1992
01:20:29,910 --> 01:20:34,800
(applauding)
1993
01:20:34,830 --> 01:20:37,810
(cheering)
1994
01:20:37,890 --> 01:20:39,400
I also had
some last-minute shopping to do.
1995
01:20:39,560 --> 01:20:41,740
Ah. There it is. Yes.
1996
01:20:41,770 --> 01:20:43,840
Your typical male to-do list.
1997
01:20:43,920 --> 01:20:46,640
Finish task that
should've been done weeks ago,
1998
01:20:46,680 --> 01:20:49,880
And interrupt woman
getting more attention than you.
1999
01:20:49,960 --> 01:20:51,650
(laughing, cheering)
2000
01:20:51,680 --> 01:20:54,130
(applauding)
2001
01:20:54,140 --> 01:20:56,850
Thank you so much, everybody.
Merry christmas!
2002
01:20:56,850 --> 01:20:59,810
(cheering and applause)
2003
01:20:59,810 --> 01:21:02,020
Encore! Encore!
2004
01:21:02,020 --> 01:21:05,430
Encore! Encore! Encore!
2005
01:21:05,510 --> 01:21:07,520
Encore! Encore!
2006
01:21:07,520 --> 01:21:10,230
Hey. Um, you know what? Come on
up and join me here on stage.
2007
01:21:10,270 --> 01:21:12,010
You want me to come on stage
right now?
2008
01:21:12,090 --> 01:21:13,240
Yeah. Come and join me.
2009
01:21:13,270 --> 01:21:14,930
(cheering and applause)
2010
01:21:15,010 --> 01:21:16,820
Yo.
2011
01:21:20,030 --> 01:21:23,500
Audience member:
Woo-hoo!
2012
01:21:24,580 --> 01:21:26,080
I've got some notes.
2013
01:21:26,120 --> 01:21:29,750
Yeah? Did you learn anything?
2014
01:21:29,790 --> 01:21:31,380
What I want most for christmas?
2015
01:21:31,380 --> 01:21:32,920
An apology.
2016
01:21:34,530 --> 01:21:37,280
I made a huge mistake.
2017
01:21:37,310 --> 01:21:38,760
I'm sorry.
2018
01:21:40,470 --> 01:21:43,060
Yeah. Well, you're
a big action superhero now,
2019
01:21:43,140 --> 01:21:44,370
So I'm sure after
your first check,
2020
01:21:44,400 --> 01:21:45,990
You'll just forget all about me.
2021
01:21:45,990 --> 01:21:47,210
I passed.
2022
01:21:47,290 --> 01:21:51,400
I want to be here,
laughing with you.
2023
01:21:53,160 --> 01:21:55,470
If you'll have me.
2024
01:21:55,550 --> 01:21:57,160
Aw.
2025
01:22:00,890 --> 01:22:02,640
Mike baxter, everyone.
2026
01:22:02,670 --> 01:22:06,620
(cheering and applause)
2027
01:22:08,420 --> 01:22:11,500
So, uh, for some of you
that may not know,
2028
01:22:11,570 --> 01:22:13,480
He was supposed to play
a chicken earlier.
2029
01:22:13,520 --> 01:22:15,220
- Rooster. It's a rooster.
- Sorry.
2030
01:22:15,250 --> 01:22:17,280
Just politically correct
for roosters everywhere.
2031
01:22:17,360 --> 01:22:18,390
Rooster.
2032
01:22:18,390 --> 01:22:20,140
Ladies and gentlemen,
a round of applause
2033
01:22:20,170 --> 01:22:24,000
For the incredible aubri wilson!
Give it up.
2034
01:22:24,080 --> 01:22:26,440
(cheering and applause)
2035
01:22:30,070 --> 01:22:32,190
(chuckling)
2036
01:22:34,340 --> 01:22:36,840
(laughing)
2037
01:22:36,870 --> 01:22:38,660
Congratulations on a spectacular
variety show.
2038
01:22:38,690 --> 01:22:40,100
Oh, thank you, robert.
2039
01:22:40,180 --> 01:22:42,830
Any chance you're free
to join me for christmas dinner?
2040
01:22:42,860 --> 01:22:44,380
Oh, robert.
2041
01:22:44,450 --> 01:22:48,550
Oh, darling, we were never
going to work out anyway.
2042
01:22:48,630 --> 01:22:51,370
You don't have children,
do you, robert?
2043
01:22:51,450 --> 01:22:54,540
Hey. Execs love you, mike.
2044
01:22:54,610 --> 01:22:55,840
They're like the wise men,
2045
01:22:55,870 --> 01:22:57,470
But they're offering
one-hour specials
2046
01:22:57,470 --> 01:22:59,780
Instead of sheep or whatever.
You did so good!
2047
01:22:59,860 --> 01:23:01,180
Come here, man.
2048
01:23:01,210 --> 01:23:03,470
Oh! Okay.
2049
01:23:03,550 --> 01:23:05,050
And you look fantastic.
2050
01:23:05,160 --> 01:23:07,850
Damon, damon. Merry christmas.
2051
01:23:07,890 --> 01:23:10,370
Are you sure about rooster man?
2052
01:23:10,410 --> 01:23:12,800
Because I bet
we could work something out
2053
01:23:12,880 --> 01:23:14,650
Right between tour
dates and everything,
2054
01:23:14,650 --> 01:23:16,090
Because practically,
it's shooting in cgi.
2055
01:23:16,170 --> 01:23:17,910
- So, if you're on stage and--
- aubri, aubri.
2056
01:23:17,990 --> 01:23:20,210
Damon, I'd like to introduce you
to aubri wilson.
2057
01:23:20,250 --> 01:23:22,870
I think she'd make
a great client for the agency.
2058
01:23:22,900 --> 01:23:24,370
Hi.
2059
01:23:24,400 --> 01:23:26,720
Nice to meet you.
2060
01:23:26,760 --> 01:23:29,480
You know,
2061
01:23:29,560 --> 01:23:31,480
I love the talk.
2062
01:23:31,560 --> 01:23:33,560
And you can have the pick
of any agent you want,
2063
01:23:33,600 --> 01:23:35,820
Especially with his endorsement.
2064
01:23:35,900 --> 01:23:37,250
Thank you. I will call you.
2065
01:23:37,400 --> 01:23:38,490
Of course.
2066
01:23:38,570 --> 01:23:40,250
Looking forward to it.
2067
01:23:40,290 --> 01:23:41,440
Ah.
2068
01:23:41,440 --> 01:23:43,760
You were wonderful, darling.
2069
01:23:43,760 --> 01:23:46,770
Oh, it's just going to
break my heart to lose you.
2070
01:23:46,850 --> 01:23:48,430
- Oh.
- Never--
2071
01:23:48,500 --> 01:23:49,930
Unless you decide to stay,
2072
01:23:50,000 --> 01:23:52,690
In which case,
I'll just have to fire you.
2073
01:23:52,690 --> 01:23:53,750
(laughing)
2074
01:23:53,780 --> 01:23:54,900
I think if I'm going on tour,
2075
01:23:54,930 --> 01:23:57,150
I'm going to need
an opening act.
2076
01:23:58,350 --> 01:24:00,950
I don't know about
an opening act, mike baxter.
2077
01:24:01,030 --> 01:24:03,570
I might consider co-headlining
with you, or--
2078
01:24:04,700 --> 01:24:06,110
- Mike: It's her.
- Oh.
2079
01:24:06,190 --> 01:24:07,440
- I'm sorry.
- Mm-hmm.
2080
01:24:07,600 --> 01:24:09,430
Oh, my goodness.
2081
01:24:09,460 --> 01:24:11,970
Well, I'm going to leave you two
to discuss.
2082
01:24:12,040 --> 01:24:14,690
And remember,
you'll always have a home
2083
01:24:14,690 --> 01:24:17,110
Here at the comedy club.
The both of you.
2084
01:24:17,220 --> 01:24:20,270
- Thanks, bella.
- What a darling couple.
2085
01:24:20,310 --> 01:24:23,300
- Oh!
- Oh, bella.
2086
01:24:27,950 --> 01:24:29,170
Are you serious
about going on tour?
2087
01:24:29,240 --> 01:24:31,450
- Definitely.
- (laughing)
2088
01:24:31,490 --> 01:24:32,970
You'll steal the show,
2089
01:24:33,050 --> 01:24:34,820
But it keeps me
from losing you again.
2090
01:24:34,820 --> 01:24:36,310
Worth the trade-off, hmm?
2091
01:24:36,380 --> 01:24:39,210
You know, I'm not like
those hollywood girls.
2092
01:24:39,240 --> 01:24:41,390
I know.
2093
01:24:41,460 --> 01:24:42,860
You're much funnier...
2094
01:24:44,220 --> 01:24:46,300
...And you're also perfect.
2095
01:24:46,340 --> 01:24:48,750
This is the best christmas ever.
2096
01:24:48,830 --> 01:24:53,140
So, does this mean you'll wait
for santa with me tonight?
2097
01:24:53,180 --> 01:24:54,420
Hmm.
2098
01:24:54,420 --> 01:24:55,840
You never answered me
at the social.
2099
01:24:55,920 --> 01:24:57,130
Absolutely.
2100
01:24:57,160 --> 01:24:59,180
Merry christmas, mike baxter.
2101
01:24:59,180 --> 01:25:01,840
Merry christmas,
aubri wilson.
2102
01:25:22,820 --> 01:25:26,540
Mike: All right.
So, I've got one more for you.
2103
01:25:26,620 --> 01:25:27,860
(applauding)
2104
01:25:27,930 --> 01:25:30,450
- Yeah. This is a love song.
- Audience member: Yeah!
2105
01:25:31,900 --> 01:25:33,540
Yee-haw!
2106
01:25:35,670 --> 01:25:38,340
♪ I really, really like you
2107
01:25:38,370 --> 01:25:40,300
♪ I'm desperate for a kiss
2108
01:25:40,300 --> 01:25:41,670
(audience members laughing)
2109
01:25:41,710 --> 01:25:44,970
♪ I asked you out
at a holiday party ♪
2110
01:25:44,970 --> 01:25:46,690
♪ but something was amiss
2111
01:25:46,730 --> 01:25:49,310
♪ you go a-lookin'
over your shoulder ♪
2112
01:25:49,390 --> 01:25:52,460
♪ telling me it's time to go
2113
01:25:52,530 --> 01:25:54,980
♪ but I looked up high
and then I saw ♪
2114
01:25:54,980 --> 01:25:57,290
♪ we're under mistletoe
2115
01:25:57,320 --> 01:25:58,560
Yes!
2116
01:25:58,570 --> 01:26:02,390
♪ kiss me, I didn't make up
the rules ♪
2117
01:26:02,470 --> 01:26:05,490
♪ don't you dare miss me
2118
01:26:05,490 --> 01:26:09,160
♪ and make me feel like
such a fool ♪
2119
01:26:09,160 --> 01:26:11,580
♪ I'm leaning in
toward your face now ♪
2120
01:26:11,660 --> 01:26:15,000
♪ it's something
that I want to achieve ♪
2121
01:26:15,000 --> 01:26:16,710
♪ and if you will allow it
2122
01:26:16,740 --> 01:26:19,390
♪ we can kiss
till new year's eve ♪
2123
01:26:19,430 --> 01:26:22,410
Thank you very much!
You've been a great audience.
2124
01:26:22,490 --> 01:26:24,740
- Thank you.
- (cheering and applause)
2125
01:26:24,820 --> 01:26:34,770
♪
157783
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