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1
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[intro music]
2
00:00:07,440 --> 00:00:11,520
[Frank] Tickets this way
for the Chatsworth Express!
3
00:00:11,600 --> 00:00:16,560
Come and watch pikeys
making a mess of the lives they were given
4
00:00:16,640 --> 00:00:19,040
by him upstairs.
5
00:00:19,120 --> 00:00:22,360
And kids they're convinced
aren't actually theirs.
6
00:00:22,440 --> 00:00:28,840
What sounds on earth could ever replace
kids needing money or wives in your face?
7
00:00:28,920 --> 00:00:31,880
Cos this, people reckon, and me included,
8
00:00:31,960 --> 00:00:36,240
is why pubs and drugs
were kindly invented.
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To calm us all down
and stop us going mental.
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These are Chatsworth Estate's
basic essentials.
11
00:00:45,280 --> 00:00:49,360
We are worth every penny
for grinding your axes.
12
00:00:49,440 --> 00:00:53,840
You shit on our heads,
but you pay the taxes.
13
00:00:57,400 --> 00:01:00,720
Imagine a Britain
without Chatsworth buccaneers
14
00:01:00,800 --> 00:01:03,400
who'd come on your face
for the price of a beer.
15
00:01:03,480 --> 00:01:07,600
Make poverty history, cheaper drugs now!
16
00:01:07,680 --> 00:01:11,760
Make poverty history, cheaper drugs now!
17
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[laughing] [cough]
18
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Scatter!
19
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Party!
20
00:01:20,680 --> 00:01:25,440
[Micky] You know what they say,
a change is as good as a rest.
21
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Well, who's "they"?
22
00:01:27,320 --> 00:01:30,760
Never really been into all
that philosophy bollocks, if I'm honest.
23
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Mam says it's cos I'm the type
what calls a spade a spade,
24
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but what the fuck else
are you gonna call it?
25
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Sometimes you just wake up
and want to do something different.
26
00:01:40,880 --> 00:01:42,800
And you've got to go with it,
27
00:01:42,880 --> 00:01:45,680
cos if you ignore it,
you get fucking nowhere.
28
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I've got something to tell ya.
29
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[Paddy] Sounds ominous.
30
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[Micky] I don't want you to judge me
or disown me.
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Somebody's been watching
too much Jeremy Kyle.
32
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I'm serious!
33
00:01:57,320 --> 00:01:59,680
I just need to get it out in the open.
34
00:01:59,760 --> 00:02:02,560
Saves any sneaking about or bullshit.
35
00:02:20,160 --> 00:02:22,920
-College?
-Study? You?
36
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-I knew this would happen.
-And what about the business?
37
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-It's only part-time.
-Studying what, exactly?
38
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Film.
39
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-And who's going to pay for that?
-I will.
40
00:02:32,840 --> 00:02:35,920
-A qualification, like?
-Obviously.
41
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[Paddy] To think we fought all our lives
to bring you up right, son,
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00:02:39,360 --> 00:02:43,480
for you to just go throw it all
back in our faces by turning to education!
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[Jamie] Karen!
44
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Karen?
45
00:02:50,440 --> 00:02:52,480
[Jamie] Where's me shin pads?
46
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Karen?
47
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-I'm busy.
-Well, have you seen them?
48
00:02:55,680 --> 00:02:59,320
-Have you looked?
-Yeah, I can't find them anywhere.
49
00:02:59,400 --> 00:03:00,920
Since when did I become your mam?
50
00:03:01,000 --> 00:03:03,560
-Oh, forget it!
-You've not even looked properly.
51
00:03:03,640 --> 00:03:06,360
Here's me working me tits off
to sort this party
52
00:03:06,440 --> 00:03:09,040
-and all you can think about is footy.
-You're paying people to help you.
53
00:03:11,840 --> 00:03:13,880
-It'll be fine.
-It won't be fine!
54
00:03:13,960 --> 00:03:16,400
You can't just keep
burying your head in the sand.
55
00:03:16,480 --> 00:03:19,160
-What do you want me to do?
-Make more effort.
56
00:03:19,240 --> 00:03:20,640
That'd be a start.
57
00:03:23,200 --> 00:03:24,160
[door slams]
58
00:03:24,240 --> 00:03:26,720
[Frank] Debbie! Debbie!
59
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[suspenseful music]
60
00:03:28,840 --> 00:03:30,320
Please!
61
00:03:30,400 --> 00:03:32,840
Please, come on! Just a fiver!
62
00:03:32,920 --> 00:03:36,160
-Hey, last time, promise.
-It's always, "Last time, promise."
63
00:03:36,240 --> 00:03:38,800
Come on,
I'm doing me bit for the credit crunch.
64
00:03:38,880 --> 00:03:40,840
You still owe me a tenner from Tuesday.
65
00:03:44,400 --> 00:03:48,480
Hey, how does it go? "The only man
who sticks closer to you in adversity
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other than a friend is a creditor."
67
00:03:50,560 --> 00:03:53,440
-Don't talk shit!
-[Frank] Yeah, but you're me daughter.
68
00:03:54,800 --> 00:03:56,720
You are far closer
than any friend of mine.
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00:04:01,080 --> 00:04:02,720
You haven't got any friends, Dad.
70
00:04:04,840 --> 00:04:06,680
[suspenseful music]
71
00:04:06,760 --> 00:04:10,960
-[Frank] Is that clown harassing you?
-[sighs] Nothing I can't handle.
72
00:04:13,600 --> 00:04:15,440
[suspenseful music]
73
00:04:20,680 --> 00:04:22,600
[Micky] It was me mate what made me come.
74
00:04:22,680 --> 00:04:24,120
He's gone away.
75
00:04:27,720 --> 00:04:30,440
It's made me realise
you've got to grab stuff while you can.
76
00:04:31,040 --> 00:04:32,400
You know, go for it.
77
00:04:32,480 --> 00:04:34,520
And when you watch a film...
78
00:04:34,600 --> 00:04:36,200
Well, that takes you away, doesn't it?
79
00:04:36,800 --> 00:04:39,240
So, I thought, "I'll try this."
80
00:04:39,960 --> 00:04:43,000
You know, learn something new.
Which is ace, innit?
81
00:04:44,320 --> 00:04:45,440
[teacher] Thanks, Micky.
82
00:04:46,720 --> 00:04:50,320
Good to know it's not just cos you think
Will Smith's dead fit, eh, Clare?
83
00:04:54,920 --> 00:04:55,760
What do you think?
84
00:04:56,480 --> 00:04:57,360
Stunning.
85
00:04:59,640 --> 00:05:01,200
I missed footy practice for this!
86
00:05:02,720 --> 00:05:05,840
Hey, Karen...
How about a stripper for the party?
87
00:05:05,920 --> 00:05:07,240
We could charge 'em more.
88
00:05:08,120 --> 00:05:09,920
Not bad... for you.
89
00:05:10,960 --> 00:05:12,240
Nice move!
90
00:05:14,520 --> 00:05:15,640
Ah! [in pain]
91
00:05:16,480 --> 00:05:17,760
You all right, lad?
92
00:05:17,840 --> 00:05:19,120
-What have you done?
-[Carl] Ah, me arm!
93
00:05:19,200 --> 00:05:20,320
[Norma] Shit!
94
00:05:21,160 --> 00:05:23,160
Jesus! [panting]
95
00:05:25,000 --> 00:05:25,880
That's a bairn?
96
00:05:27,160 --> 00:05:28,080
Get rid of it.
97
00:05:28,880 --> 00:05:29,760
[both] What?
98
00:05:29,840 --> 00:05:30,920
It's not mine!
99
00:05:31,000 --> 00:05:33,360
-We should call the police.
-No way!
100
00:05:33,440 --> 00:05:34,600
[Karen] They'll shut us down.
101
00:05:34,680 --> 00:05:36,600
Get rid of it. You get that seen to.
102
00:05:36,680 --> 00:05:39,520
And you... take over!
103
00:05:39,600 --> 00:05:41,240
[ominous music]
104
00:05:43,200 --> 00:05:45,440
[front door opens and shuts]
105
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[Mimi] Homework?
106
00:05:55,440 --> 00:05:56,800
It's part of me assignment.
107
00:05:57,320 --> 00:05:59,720
An assignment? Very clever!
108
00:05:59,800 --> 00:06:04,000
I just want something for myself!
Why do you always have to take the piss?
109
00:06:04,520 --> 00:06:06,680
-I'm not, son.
-No, you've got Dad!
110
00:06:06,760 --> 00:06:08,920
Jamie's got The Jockey, Shane's got Kelly,
111
00:06:09,000 --> 00:06:10,840
Mandy's got Katie... What have I got?
112
00:06:11,640 --> 00:06:13,880
A few pairs of shit-flickers,
and a pink car?
113
00:06:15,040 --> 00:06:17,680
Tell you the truth,
I've thought about studying for years.
114
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I'd love to do something like this.
115
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What have you got to do, then?
116
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What they do in Hollywood.
117
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You've got to put the whole film
into one sentence,
118
00:06:32,320 --> 00:06:33,800
and see if it sounds like a goer.
119
00:06:34,960 --> 00:06:38,480
What, like, "Mad-fuck mummy's boy
gets giddy with a knife"?
120
00:06:39,640 --> 00:06:41,280
[laughs loudly]
121
00:06:43,280 --> 00:06:44,440
Carl Gallagher?
122
00:06:45,640 --> 00:06:47,400
[soft sweet melody]
123
00:06:50,480 --> 00:06:52,640
They pay you fuck all for this.
Why do you do it?
124
00:06:53,480 --> 00:06:57,280
Always wanted to help people.
It's my vocation.
125
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Your what?
126
00:06:59,280 --> 00:07:02,200
Like a calling.
Some jobs you just have to do.
127
00:07:03,520 --> 00:07:08,680
It's a very attractive personality trait,
Carl, having a vocation.
128
00:07:08,760 --> 00:07:11,160
I'm just like that. Help anyone, me.
129
00:07:12,360 --> 00:07:14,600
-Really?
-Runs in the family.
130
00:07:15,160 --> 00:07:18,000
My brother's abroad at the moment.
Works for Save The Children.
131
00:07:18,080 --> 00:07:20,240
[techno music playing] [all cheering]
132
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We're always looking
for volunteers here, you know.
133
00:07:33,160 --> 00:07:35,720
"My mouth slipped off her hardened nipple,
134
00:07:35,800 --> 00:07:39,080
and I kissed and licked my way
down her tight body.
135
00:07:40,080 --> 00:07:44,120
Her skin tasted like sweet vanilla,
and I wanted to devour her.
136
00:07:45,320 --> 00:07:46,720
As I went to my knees,
137
00:07:46,800 --> 00:07:50,760
my fingers slipped inside
as she whimpered with pure pleasure."
138
00:07:51,840 --> 00:07:53,240
[Mimi] How are you getting on?
139
00:07:53,920 --> 00:07:56,480
[stammering] I can't do it!
140
00:07:59,160 --> 00:08:01,640
"Classic animation
is not just for children,
141
00:08:01,720 --> 00:08:04,920
and is an equally legitimate
dramatic tool as film.
142
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Discuss."
143
00:08:06,680 --> 00:08:07,520
See?
144
00:08:08,720 --> 00:08:12,400
I'll tell you what this needs...
a sharp, analytical mind.
145
00:08:13,560 --> 00:08:14,760
I'll do it for you, son.
146
00:08:21,280 --> 00:08:23,520
He just needs a bit of encouragement
every now and then.
147
00:08:23,600 --> 00:08:24,880
He can be a bit stubborn.
148
00:08:26,800 --> 00:08:28,600
Go on, mate. Your move.
149
00:08:28,680 --> 00:08:29,640
[nurse] Stubborn?
150
00:08:29,720 --> 00:08:30,600
My Walter?
151
00:08:30,680 --> 00:08:33,360
You wouldn't know
the meaning of the word, would you, love?
152
00:08:37,600 --> 00:08:40,039
Eighteen or eighty...
you are all the same.
153
00:08:42,120 --> 00:08:43,120
[nurse] Carl's move.
154
00:08:44,440 --> 00:08:45,280
Sorry.
155
00:08:45,360 --> 00:08:48,760
What are you apologising to me for?
Fast as a leopard, this old-timer.
156
00:08:48,840 --> 00:08:49,800
I keep telling him,
157
00:08:49,880 --> 00:08:52,600
if I were ten years older,
and he were ten younger,
158
00:08:52,680 --> 00:08:53,840
we'd probably be together.
159
00:08:54,520 --> 00:08:56,480
We just clicked, didn't we, babe?
160
00:08:56,560 --> 00:08:57,440
Bollocks!
161
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Serious.
162
00:09:00,760 --> 00:09:02,000
Fucking wadded.
163
00:09:12,800 --> 00:09:15,320
I could just tell you a lie,
or I could just be honest.
164
00:09:15,400 --> 00:09:16,280
Are you with me?
165
00:09:18,240 --> 00:09:19,600
Not really, Miss.
166
00:09:19,680 --> 00:09:22,160
You shouldn't have got my story
in with your assignment.
167
00:09:23,800 --> 00:09:24,760
That was yours?
168
00:09:24,840 --> 00:09:26,040
Yeah. I wrote it.
169
00:09:27,280 --> 00:09:28,720
I do it on the side, just...
170
00:09:30,680 --> 00:09:32,400
short stories with a twist, really.
171
00:09:32,480 --> 00:09:33,360
Not bad.
172
00:09:35,840 --> 00:09:38,280
It's just a hobby, and they pay me.
[nervous laughter]
173
00:09:38,360 --> 00:09:41,400
Aw, nice one.
You know, getting paid for a hobby.
174
00:09:42,040 --> 00:09:43,520
It's not quite as simple as that.
175
00:09:43,600 --> 00:09:45,560
They're just words. It can't be that hard.
176
00:09:48,160 --> 00:09:50,120
Have a go yourself, then,
if you're so sure.
177
00:09:55,720 --> 00:09:57,760
-What, now?
-I'm waiting.
178
00:10:00,160 --> 00:10:01,040
All right.
179
00:10:03,680 --> 00:10:09,200
How about, "His thrusts pumped harder
as his seed boiled in his balls,
180
00:10:09,280 --> 00:10:11,720
ready to spill out into her velvet chasm"?
181
00:10:13,400 --> 00:10:15,800
Bloody hell, that's great, Micky!
182
00:10:16,680 --> 00:10:18,600
Hey, do you reckon they'd pay me and all?
183
00:10:20,200 --> 00:10:22,200
Maybe we should go back to mine,
184
00:10:22,280 --> 00:10:23,880
-grab a coffee?
-Yeah.
185
00:10:26,680 --> 00:10:29,280
There's not much difference
between his world and ours.
186
00:10:29,360 --> 00:10:33,800
His mother was a single parent,
his father was permanently AWOL.
187
00:10:33,880 --> 00:10:37,000
Poor little bastard
had fuck all stability.
188
00:10:37,080 --> 00:10:40,880
-Makes you think, doesn't it?
-Yes, love.
189
00:10:40,960 --> 00:10:43,920
[sniffling] We've done all right
by our kids, haven't we?
190
00:10:44,000 --> 00:10:46,960
-Of course we have, love.
-[Mimi] Even if I did get shot, I mean,
191
00:10:47,040 --> 00:10:48,360
at least you'd still be here,
192
00:10:48,440 --> 00:10:51,800
not like that fucker,
out gallivanting, flashing his horns.
193
00:10:51,880 --> 00:10:56,240
You know, he had exactly the same shit
on his plate as us,
194
00:10:56,320 --> 00:10:58,040
did that Bambi!
195
00:10:58,120 --> 00:11:02,040
I'm just, er...
popping out for a pint, love.
196
00:11:02,120 --> 00:11:03,400
[sobbing] Okay.
197
00:11:13,720 --> 00:11:16,520
-[front door opens]
-[indistinct chatter on TV]
198
00:11:16,600 --> 00:11:18,280
-[door shuts]
-[Stan] Hiya.
199
00:11:18,360 --> 00:11:19,600
Hiya, love.
200
00:11:21,320 --> 00:11:22,360
[kiss]
201
00:11:24,640 --> 00:11:28,200
-Good day at school, Ches?
-Depends what you class as good.
202
00:11:32,640 --> 00:11:34,000
I said the wrong thing again.
203
00:11:34,080 --> 00:11:37,360
Come on, was it really that long ago
since you were his age?
204
00:11:37,440 --> 00:11:38,400
[Stan] No.
205
00:11:38,480 --> 00:11:41,840
You could make more of an effort,
at least try and bond.
206
00:11:41,920 --> 00:11:44,920
Like I haven't been doing?
207
00:11:45,000 --> 00:11:47,040
I'm sick of this!
208
00:11:47,120 --> 00:11:49,920
All I want is a bit of harmony.
209
00:11:50,000 --> 00:11:54,080
You're both male.
You must have something in common.
210
00:12:11,680 --> 00:12:13,120
Jamie!
211
00:12:19,600 --> 00:12:20,920
[dance music playing]
212
00:12:21,000 --> 00:12:22,960
We've hardly got anything to say any more.
213
00:12:23,040 --> 00:12:24,480
Wait till they start with the baby oil.
214
00:12:24,560 --> 00:12:26,880
He's getting right on me nerves.
215
00:12:26,960 --> 00:12:30,640
I never quite got that.
Rubbing up a complete stranger.
216
00:12:30,720 --> 00:12:33,480
Some of these women
haven't had a shag in ten years.
217
00:12:33,560 --> 00:12:34,480
So?
218
00:12:34,560 --> 00:12:37,440
So, they pay me a fiver
for a ticket to see a bit of cock.
219
00:12:37,520 --> 00:12:40,160
There's no crime
in wanting to break the routine.
220
00:12:40,240 --> 00:12:42,320
Seven-year itch? Already?
221
00:12:42,400 --> 00:12:45,280
It just all seems a bit flat.
222
00:12:45,360 --> 00:12:48,440
Karen? I've found an article.
223
00:12:48,520 --> 00:12:52,560
The previous landlord was shacked up here
with some bird that topped herself.
224
00:12:52,640 --> 00:12:55,680
Er... Gloria someone.
225
00:12:55,760 --> 00:12:59,360
-Guess why?
-Why, Norma?
226
00:12:59,440 --> 00:13:02,240
She never got over the death of her baby.
227
00:13:02,320 --> 00:13:06,600
Everyone has bad patches.
It will pass, you know?
228
00:13:06,680 --> 00:13:10,000
I keep hoping it will,
and things will just perk right back up.
229
00:13:10,080 --> 00:13:13,000
You two are solid. You'll just ride it.
230
00:13:15,080 --> 00:13:17,200
Who says I want to, though?
231
00:13:21,840 --> 00:13:23,200
She'll calm down.
232
00:13:23,280 --> 00:13:26,040
It's best if I just keep out
of her way for a bit, Dad.
233
00:13:26,120 --> 00:13:28,440
You know what women are like.
I do know it, son.
234
00:13:28,520 --> 00:13:31,880
-[Shane] What are you doing here?
-Giving the missus a wide berth.
235
00:13:31,960 --> 00:13:33,560
[Paddy] He's having a breather.
236
00:13:33,640 --> 00:13:36,160
-Trouble?
-Yeah, sort of.
237
00:13:36,240 --> 00:13:39,720
-[Paddy] Morning, Hitchcock.
-She finally kicked you out, then?
238
00:13:39,800 --> 00:13:41,480
You're not getting a divorce, are ya?
239
00:13:41,560 --> 00:13:43,200
Am I fuck! No, it's nothing.
240
00:13:43,760 --> 00:13:47,040
It's just... Well, you know how it is
when everything you do is wrong.
241
00:13:47,120 --> 00:13:49,640
Where's your spine?
You sound like a right poof.
242
00:13:49,720 --> 00:13:51,400
[Paddy] He's right, for once.
243
00:13:51,960 --> 00:13:53,600
Pussyfooting won't get you anywhere.
244
00:13:53,680 --> 00:13:55,480
Take the upper hand.
Act like a man for a change.
245
00:13:55,560 --> 00:13:57,440
Show them who's boss. They love that.
246
00:13:58,560 --> 00:13:59,480
You're a Maguire!
247
00:13:59,560 --> 00:14:01,720
Balls of steel. Like your father.
248
00:14:01,800 --> 00:14:02,960
Coco Pops, sweetheart?
249
00:14:07,000 --> 00:14:08,800
Lose the sock, Pablo.
250
00:14:09,800 --> 00:14:14,240
-[Mandy] It's not Pablo, really, is it?
-No. Alan.
251
00:14:14,320 --> 00:14:16,440
And you're not from Rio de Janeiro?
252
00:14:17,000 --> 00:14:18,200
Wigan, actually.
253
00:14:19,680 --> 00:14:20,600
[stripper] Sorry.
254
00:14:23,120 --> 00:14:24,080
See ya.
255
00:14:25,720 --> 00:14:27,560
[derisive laughter]
256
00:14:27,640 --> 00:14:29,320
No-one wants to see that.
257
00:14:29,400 --> 00:14:31,880
-It was your idea in the first place.
-I meant a bird.
258
00:14:31,960 --> 00:14:32,880
Typical.
259
00:14:32,960 --> 00:14:35,960
The women round here
are gonna love that, aren't they, girls?
260
00:14:36,040 --> 00:14:38,280
We're supposed to be bringing people in,
not driving them away!
261
00:14:38,360 --> 00:14:40,960
Like I don't know that,
after all the work I've done!
262
00:14:41,040 --> 00:14:45,200
-You're not the only one grafting.
-You have painted a wall, Jamie!
263
00:14:46,040 --> 00:14:47,120
Nothing's enough, is it?
264
00:14:50,840 --> 00:14:51,760
[gags]
265
00:14:52,800 --> 00:14:55,480
-[nurse] Come on.
-[Carl sighs] Thanks.
266
00:14:56,080 --> 00:14:58,440
-Shit's not one of my strong points.
-[nurse laughs]
267
00:15:00,560 --> 00:15:03,760
-You're supposed to be on the ward.
-The poor lad just needs easing in.
268
00:15:03,840 --> 00:15:05,760
I think he can look after himself,
can't you, Carl?
269
00:15:05,840 --> 00:15:06,680
Yeah.
270
00:15:06,760 --> 00:15:09,720
-Shift it, you.
-All those wasted years at charm school!
271
00:15:09,800 --> 00:15:13,400
Listen, lady,
if those beds aren't done by one,
272
00:15:13,480 --> 00:15:15,000
it's me who gets it in the neck,
273
00:15:15,080 --> 00:15:18,160
and I won't be taking the rap
for some two-bit auxiliary, alright?
274
00:15:18,240 --> 00:15:19,840
Don't talk to her like that!
275
00:15:19,920 --> 00:15:21,800
-Excuse me?
-Leave it, Carl.
276
00:15:21,880 --> 00:15:23,360
No! What right has she got?
277
00:15:23,440 --> 00:15:27,600
I must admit, Carl, I thought
you were a man of more seasoned taste.
278
00:15:27,680 --> 00:15:30,680
You know what? Fuck off!
You can stick your shit job.
279
00:15:30,760 --> 00:15:33,240
You'd have to be mental
to do this for nowt.
280
00:15:36,920 --> 00:15:37,880
[nurse] Carl!
281
00:15:39,000 --> 00:15:40,400
Thanks for sticking up for me.
282
00:15:40,480 --> 00:15:46,120
I should have just got on with the job.
I was well in there.
283
00:15:48,400 --> 00:15:49,880
[dramatic music]
284
00:15:49,960 --> 00:15:51,000
Have you talked to her?
285
00:15:52,560 --> 00:15:54,600
So she can tell me again how shit I am?
286
00:15:56,360 --> 00:15:59,320
I can't do right for doing wrong, Dad.
It's relentless.
287
00:15:59,400 --> 00:16:01,800
I just want to scream at him all the time.
288
00:16:01,880 --> 00:16:05,680
You're good mates, you two, underneath.
That's got to count for summat.
289
00:16:06,320 --> 00:16:07,200
Nah!
290
00:16:07,760 --> 00:16:10,160
Wrong time of the month,
that's all it'll be.
291
00:16:10,240 --> 00:16:14,160
-You do love him, don't you?
-[Karen] Not as much as I can hate him.
292
00:16:14,840 --> 00:16:16,360
I feel like I could kill him,
293
00:16:17,400 --> 00:16:20,760
like actually pick up a knife
and slash his throat.
294
00:16:21,320 --> 00:16:22,520
[Kelly] That bad?
295
00:16:22,600 --> 00:16:26,000
-[Paddy] Have you checked the tides?
-You're talking shit, Dad.
296
00:16:26,080 --> 00:16:27,640
On my life, son.
297
00:16:27,720 --> 00:16:30,000
Leave the bog seat up
in our house of a full moon,
298
00:16:30,080 --> 00:16:32,240
and your mother
turns into a screaming banshee.
299
00:16:32,320 --> 00:16:34,400
But it's romantic, what you did.
300
00:16:34,480 --> 00:16:36,440
The novelty soon wears off.
301
00:16:37,560 --> 00:16:42,480
He couldn't give a shit any more
about me or this place.
302
00:16:43,480 --> 00:16:44,480
I don't get it.
303
00:16:44,560 --> 00:16:48,000
[chuckling] It's marriage, son,
you're not supposed to.
304
00:16:50,080 --> 00:16:51,960
I think I'm losing him, Kelly.
305
00:17:07,359 --> 00:17:08,359
What do you think?
306
00:17:12,920 --> 00:17:15,599
-Where did you get this?
-Perks of the job, that's all.
307
00:17:15,680 --> 00:17:16,720
It's for you.
308
00:17:18,400 --> 00:17:19,680
Wouldn't be my first choice.
309
00:17:21,880 --> 00:17:23,000
[Stan exhales]
310
00:17:24,240 --> 00:17:26,480
-[tapping]
-[Stan humming]
311
00:17:35,200 --> 00:17:38,560
[Mimi] Years I made Shane wear
that patch to sort out his squint.
312
00:17:38,640 --> 00:17:40,800
That's all she was doing for Dumbo.
313
00:17:41,800 --> 00:17:44,800
How's it her fault
he's got big fuck-off ears?
314
00:17:44,880 --> 00:17:46,240
Mole, sweetheart.
315
00:17:46,320 --> 00:17:49,600
And when she sticks up for him,
he gets even more shit,
316
00:17:50,480 --> 00:17:52,640
cos they've branded his mam a nutter!
317
00:17:54,200 --> 00:17:56,240
How do you ever get over
that sort of thing?
318
00:17:56,920 --> 00:17:57,880
Imagine it!
319
00:17:59,800 --> 00:18:01,680
-All rise, it's Spielberg.
-All right?
320
00:18:04,680 --> 00:18:05,560
B.
321
00:18:06,200 --> 00:18:09,360
B? [yelling] I got a B!
322
00:18:09,440 --> 00:18:11,520
[laughing with joy]
Did you hear that, Paddy?
323
00:18:17,280 --> 00:18:18,280
[knock at door]
324
00:18:23,720 --> 00:18:25,280
Fuck me, you look nice.
325
00:18:25,360 --> 00:18:27,720
Good job I do, cos you're taking me out.
326
00:18:29,400 --> 00:18:30,560
-Hiya.
-Hi.
327
00:18:31,640 --> 00:18:32,840
It's the least you can do,
328
00:18:32,920 --> 00:18:35,440
since I saved you
from the clutches of that silly boot.
329
00:18:35,520 --> 00:18:36,760
This is Maxine.
330
00:18:37,520 --> 00:18:38,880
-Hi.
-Oh, hiya.
331
00:18:39,520 --> 00:18:40,480
Is she yours?
332
00:18:41,520 --> 00:18:42,960
-[Monica] Yeah.
-Won't be a sec.
333
00:18:43,040 --> 00:18:44,160
Can I have this one, Mon?
334
00:18:44,240 --> 00:18:45,360
Uh-huh.
335
00:18:45,440 --> 00:18:48,040
You look amazing
for a bird that's just sprogged.
336
00:18:48,120 --> 00:18:49,640
-Oh, thanks!
-[Stella crying]
337
00:18:51,000 --> 00:18:52,800
Norma, what are you doing?
338
00:18:52,880 --> 00:18:53,800
Nowt.
339
00:18:55,400 --> 00:18:58,240
[fast-paced upbeat music]
340
00:19:11,040 --> 00:19:13,560
-Get your coat, you've pulled.
-[Carl panting]
341
00:19:14,160 --> 00:19:16,040
[Maxine] My Auntie Julie's into all this.
342
00:19:16,120 --> 00:19:17,320
She sells door-to-door.
343
00:19:17,400 --> 00:19:19,600
You should see the boot of the car,
boxes full of creams.
344
00:19:19,680 --> 00:19:20,600
What creams?
345
00:19:20,680 --> 00:19:23,920
Anti-wrinkle, anti-blackhead,
anti-cellulite.
346
00:19:24,000 --> 00:19:25,760
Auntie Julie's got a cream for it.
347
00:19:25,840 --> 00:19:29,120
-Anti-cellulite?
-Amazing. Honest.
348
00:19:30,040 --> 00:19:31,000
[Maxine] See?
349
00:19:32,240 --> 00:19:33,600
[Maxine] So, where you off?
350
00:19:33,680 --> 00:19:35,440
Just to The Jockey. Got a bit of a do on.
351
00:19:35,520 --> 00:19:38,480
-Dressed like that?
-They've done it up. About bloody time.
352
00:19:38,560 --> 00:19:41,040
Love a good do, me.
We'll all go, shall we?
353
00:19:41,560 --> 00:19:44,160
-[Maxine] What's that smell?
-[Debbie] It's not me, it's Carl!
354
00:19:44,240 --> 00:19:45,240
[Carl] What smell?
355
00:19:45,320 --> 00:19:46,440
[door slams]
356
00:19:48,200 --> 00:19:50,880
-[dance music playing]
-[people cheering]
357
00:19:54,560 --> 00:19:55,440
All right?
358
00:19:55,520 --> 00:19:57,560
-Hiya, mate.
-Hiya.
359
00:19:57,640 --> 00:20:00,000
-That's Joe, the new footy captain.
-Hi!
360
00:20:01,280 --> 00:20:03,800
-Hi. Mandy.
-All right?
361
00:20:05,960 --> 00:20:08,040
[women cheering]
362
00:20:10,560 --> 00:20:14,520
If I wanted meat and two veg with me pint,
I'd drink at the Berni Inn.
363
00:20:15,160 --> 00:20:17,680
-He's got a point.
-He's just doing his job.
364
00:20:17,760 --> 00:20:20,600
What's wrong with a lap dancer?
That's entertainment!
365
00:20:20,680 --> 00:20:21,840
[men cheering]
366
00:20:21,920 --> 00:20:23,520
-[men] Off! Off! Off!
-[Carl] Off! Off!
367
00:20:23,600 --> 00:20:25,000
[man shouts] Get off!
368
00:20:25,080 --> 00:20:26,400
Time's up!
369
00:20:27,680 --> 00:20:28,600
[men] Off, off!
370
00:20:28,680 --> 00:20:31,960
-Bloody hell! Is it always this lively?
-You call this lively?
371
00:20:35,400 --> 00:20:37,040
We're losing customers, Karen.
372
00:20:37,120 --> 00:20:38,520
Sling it, you muppet.
373
00:20:38,600 --> 00:20:40,400
Fuck it. Fuck it. Turn it off.
374
00:20:41,800 --> 00:20:43,280
-[music stops]
-[man] Get off!
375
00:20:43,360 --> 00:20:45,480
-See?
-So, it's gone a bit wrong.
376
00:20:45,560 --> 00:20:49,120
-[Jamie] It's a total disaster, Karen.
-[Karen] We're busy, aren't we?
377
00:20:49,200 --> 00:20:53,040
-You should've listened.
-[Karen] One piddly suggestion, Jamie!
378
00:20:53,120 --> 00:20:55,480
It's took a lot more than that
to pull this lot off.
379
00:20:55,560 --> 00:20:57,440
It's not my fault nobody wants to see it.
380
00:20:58,200 --> 00:20:59,760
Well, some of them do. Look.
381
00:20:59,840 --> 00:21:01,560
[women singing]
♪ How do you like it? ♪
382
00:21:01,640 --> 00:21:02,480
♪ Oh, oh, oh! ♪
383
00:21:02,560 --> 00:21:04,200
[woman] Them lot are gagging for it.
384
00:21:04,280 --> 00:21:06,560
I just wanted
everyone to have a good night.
385
00:21:06,640 --> 00:21:08,280
Well, I'm having a good night.
386
00:21:12,000 --> 00:21:15,360
Look, most of them are that desperate,
they'd pay to watch anything strip.
387
00:21:19,480 --> 00:21:22,520
I'm sorry about that, everyone.
If you can just be patient with me,
388
00:21:22,600 --> 00:21:25,280
I'll have some more entertainment
sorted in a minute, so...
389
00:21:27,080 --> 00:21:28,880
[dance music playing]
390
00:21:31,200 --> 00:21:33,720
That's more like it! Yeah!
391
00:21:33,800 --> 00:21:36,440
[people cheering]
392
00:21:46,280 --> 00:21:48,040
[crowd] Off, off, off!
393
00:21:52,440 --> 00:21:55,200
-Moral support!
-She's smart, that one.
394
00:21:56,640 --> 00:21:58,600
-[men cheering]
-[whistles]
395
00:21:59,760 --> 00:22:00,760
[groaning]
396
00:22:05,400 --> 00:22:07,360
Go on, girls!
397
00:22:07,440 --> 00:22:08,800
Can't let the side down.
398
00:22:08,880 --> 00:22:11,720
-Whoa, neddy.
-Dad, I'm not ten!
399
00:22:11,800 --> 00:22:13,200
I'm not your little girl any more!
400
00:22:17,240 --> 00:22:19,480
Surplus to requirements, Lillian.
401
00:22:19,560 --> 00:22:20,960
Yeah!
402
00:22:26,320 --> 00:22:28,680
What good am I for her these days?
403
00:22:28,760 --> 00:22:30,240
She'll come round.
404
00:22:30,320 --> 00:22:34,360
I was the same at her age,
like an uncontrollable tiger.
405
00:22:34,440 --> 00:22:36,280
I'm no different now, if I'm honest.
406
00:22:45,400 --> 00:22:47,920
-[all quiet]
-[Lillian] Hello, boys!
407
00:22:49,880 --> 00:22:52,200
[crow croaking]
408
00:22:52,280 --> 00:22:53,280
[laughing]
409
00:22:53,360 --> 00:22:55,240
[Carl whispers]
410
00:22:55,320 --> 00:22:57,920
[laughing]
411
00:22:58,000 --> 00:22:59,680
Debbie?
412
00:22:59,760 --> 00:23:01,040
Oh, sorry, I've got a date.
413
00:23:01,120 --> 00:23:03,720
-Who?
-So have you.
414
00:23:03,800 --> 00:23:05,520
Subtle.
415
00:23:05,600 --> 00:23:07,040
[giggling]
416
00:23:07,120 --> 00:23:09,200
My kind of bird.
417
00:23:09,280 --> 00:23:12,320
-Back to mine?
-What for?
418
00:23:13,720 --> 00:23:15,400
-Coffee?
-Coffee?
419
00:23:16,760 --> 00:23:19,840
-[groaning]
-[moaning]
420
00:23:24,320 --> 00:23:27,120
[both moaning intensely]
421
00:23:29,160 --> 00:23:30,120
[Carl grunts]
422
00:23:30,200 --> 00:23:33,200
-Oh! Sorry. Are you all right?
-Shh! Keep going.
423
00:23:35,760 --> 00:23:37,960
[Maxine moaning]
424
00:23:38,040 --> 00:23:41,680
[all laughing hysterically]
425
00:23:41,760 --> 00:23:43,600
She's built like a brick shithouse,
426
00:23:43,680 --> 00:23:46,240
and she's grabbing hold of them like this,
and she's got big hands,
427
00:23:46,320 --> 00:23:50,240
like fella's hands, all big and veiny,
and she's shouting at me.
428
00:23:50,320 --> 00:23:54,040
-I'd have told her to sling it.
-[Debbie] Did you get 'em back?
429
00:23:54,120 --> 00:23:55,920
Hiya, babes! Toast?
430
00:24:01,640 --> 00:24:03,080
[indistinct radio chatter]
431
00:24:12,000 --> 00:24:12,920
Jamie!
432
00:24:16,600 --> 00:24:17,560
Stop following me.
433
00:24:17,640 --> 00:24:19,920
[sighing]
We're bound to bump into each other.
434
00:24:20,000 --> 00:24:23,080
Sitting in your car watching me
isn't us bumping into each other.
435
00:24:23,160 --> 00:24:25,960
But this is!
436
00:24:26,040 --> 00:24:27,520
Just stay away.
437
00:24:27,600 --> 00:24:30,600
You should be with me enjoying yourself,
not bringing her up.
438
00:24:30,680 --> 00:24:33,000
I'm not bringing her up.
439
00:24:33,080 --> 00:24:34,800
You're old before your time, Debs.
440
00:24:34,880 --> 00:24:37,760
At least when you were with me
we had fun, didn't we?
441
00:24:37,840 --> 00:24:39,680
Don't kid yourself, grandad!
442
00:24:46,000 --> 00:24:47,840
[girls shouting]
443
00:24:49,720 --> 00:24:52,400
[Carrie] Hey, break it up, now!
444
00:24:52,480 --> 00:24:53,560
Now!
445
00:24:54,520 --> 00:24:55,400
[Carrie] Away!
446
00:24:55,480 --> 00:24:56,960
What are you with fighting girls for, huh?
447
00:24:57,040 --> 00:24:58,080
He was helping me!
448
00:24:58,160 --> 00:24:59,920
-They jumped me!
-She jumped us!
449
00:25:00,000 --> 00:25:01,080
Hey!
450
00:25:01,160 --> 00:25:02,200
They've got my mp3 player.
451
00:25:02,280 --> 00:25:04,640
Look at my face!
She nearly scratched me eyes out!
452
00:25:04,720 --> 00:25:07,360
-What's going on, Meena?
-[Chesney] That's right, take their side.
453
00:25:07,440 --> 00:25:09,120
-You're all the same.
-It's not about sides,
454
00:25:09,200 --> 00:25:12,120
you're committing a public order offence,
not to mention assault.
455
00:25:12,200 --> 00:25:13,640
Now clear off, you two.
456
00:25:14,360 --> 00:25:16,840
[Chesney]
See? That's it. Let the white girls go!
457
00:25:16,920 --> 00:25:18,640
-Well, that's enough.
-Schoolies, too.
458
00:25:18,720 --> 00:25:20,960
-Just your type.
-Why are you so angry, eh?
459
00:25:21,040 --> 00:25:22,320
I've seen what it's like for you.
460
00:25:22,400 --> 00:25:24,480
You don't go short,
you spoilt little bastard.
461
00:25:24,560 --> 00:25:26,480
It's got nothing to do with colour!
462
00:25:27,240 --> 00:25:29,440
[shouting]
We just expect this bollocks from you!
463
00:25:29,520 --> 00:25:30,520
Come on.
464
00:25:30,600 --> 00:25:32,760
We'll sort it out down the station, yeah?
465
00:25:37,680 --> 00:25:40,160
[Micky] She was desperate
to get hold of it once more.
466
00:25:40,240 --> 00:25:41,960
It wasn't the longest she'd seen,
467
00:25:42,040 --> 00:25:45,160
but the fact that she couldn't get
her hand round it told a story.
468
00:25:45,240 --> 00:25:46,600
[laughs]
469
00:25:48,560 --> 00:25:50,200
They couldn't wait a minute longer.
470
00:25:50,280 --> 00:25:53,840
She reached for his belt
as he tore off her shirt.
471
00:25:53,920 --> 00:25:55,400
I bet she isn't wearing a bra, is she?
472
00:25:55,480 --> 00:25:57,400
-No.
-Dirty bitch!
473
00:25:57,480 --> 00:26:01,920
She looked up at his chest,
all glistening with sweat. [panting]
474
00:26:02,800 --> 00:26:04,720
His hard abs, and full pecs,
475
00:26:04,800 --> 00:26:08,000
rolling up and down with his deep,
manly breathing.
476
00:26:08,080 --> 00:26:09,920
You're making us wait, aren't you?
477
00:26:10,680 --> 00:26:12,080
-Yeah.
-Criminal.
478
00:26:14,440 --> 00:26:17,720
As she ground him down, [slapping]
faster and harder,
479
00:26:18,400 --> 00:26:20,240
he bit on her erect nipple as the blood
480
00:26:20,320 --> 00:26:22,600
rushed excitedly into his dick--
-Cock!
481
00:26:22,680 --> 00:26:24,400
-Cock!
-Does he fuck her then?
482
00:26:25,080 --> 00:26:26,280
-Yeah.
-How?
483
00:26:26,360 --> 00:26:27,640
Up the arse?
484
00:26:28,760 --> 00:26:30,080
I meant "from behind".
485
00:26:30,960 --> 00:26:33,160
I absolutely love it doggy!
486
00:26:33,880 --> 00:26:37,200
I think I'd prefer
it if these two were face to face.
487
00:26:37,960 --> 00:26:38,800
[door opens]
488
00:26:42,480 --> 00:26:43,760
Hi, darl'.
489
00:26:47,840 --> 00:26:51,560
[Karen] Grow up! It's just me tits.
I kept them drinking, didn't I?
490
00:26:51,640 --> 00:26:53,720
-It's not just that.
-What is it?
491
00:26:55,160 --> 00:26:58,680
Everything. All this!
492
00:26:58,760 --> 00:27:01,920
It's a constant battle. [sighs]
493
00:27:02,000 --> 00:27:04,440
-It doesn't last long, does it?
-What?
494
00:27:04,520 --> 00:27:06,040
The honeymoon.
495
00:27:06,120 --> 00:27:08,920
-Karen...
-What, Norma?
496
00:27:09,000 --> 00:27:12,320
I googled that Harris bloke.
He did 15 years for murder!
497
00:27:12,400 --> 00:27:15,120
-So?
-He probably did away with both of them.
498
00:27:15,200 --> 00:27:18,760
If I can find out where he is, he might
be able to tell us about Gloria's baby.
499
00:27:18,840 --> 00:27:21,400
-Gloria's fucking baby?
-Calm down.
500
00:27:22,120 --> 00:27:23,400
I just want closure, Karen.
501
00:27:23,480 --> 00:27:26,000
Have you heard yourself?
Who the fuck is Gloria?
502
00:27:26,080 --> 00:27:27,880
I told you to dump the fucking baby,
503
00:27:27,960 --> 00:27:30,280
so, why haven't you dumped
the fucking baby?
504
00:27:31,480 --> 00:27:33,560
I just... want... closure.
505
00:27:36,840 --> 00:27:37,680
Look...
506
00:27:38,400 --> 00:27:40,680
You two should have a night out.
507
00:27:41,480 --> 00:27:43,200
Out of this place? Doubt it.
508
00:27:43,840 --> 00:27:46,840
Well, I can cover for you.
One night wouldn't hurt.
509
00:27:49,000 --> 00:27:50,080
Told you.
510
00:27:50,160 --> 00:27:53,080
[stammering]
Look... I could stay over, if you like.
511
00:27:53,160 --> 00:27:55,800
You could have a late one.
512
00:27:56,720 --> 00:27:58,480
-Would ya?
-Course.
513
00:28:00,920 --> 00:28:02,160
We should do something.
514
00:28:04,640 --> 00:28:06,840
You can put one of them in the loos,
if you want.
515
00:28:08,680 --> 00:28:09,720
You all right, Karen?
516
00:28:10,840 --> 00:28:12,000
Pay day.
517
00:28:12,960 --> 00:28:14,800
Hey... top night.
518
00:28:21,000 --> 00:28:23,960
-Eyes up, pal!
-[Karen] Jamie!
519
00:28:33,680 --> 00:28:35,920
Oh, here he comes, PC Patronising.
520
00:28:38,320 --> 00:28:39,640
Listen, kids.
521
00:28:39,720 --> 00:28:41,800
It's his fault we're here,
in the first place.
522
00:28:42,480 --> 00:28:43,360
That's not fair.
523
00:28:43,440 --> 00:28:46,280
Where did you get the mp3 player?
Lost property box?
524
00:28:46,360 --> 00:28:47,200
You're all snides.
525
00:28:47,280 --> 00:28:49,280
Give it a rest for a minute, Chesney!
526
00:28:50,120 --> 00:28:51,600
I've had a word with the Sarge.
527
00:28:51,680 --> 00:28:53,440
-So?
-I'm taking you home.
528
00:28:53,520 --> 00:28:55,400
Oh! So you can grass to Mum?
529
00:28:55,480 --> 00:28:57,880
-Why would I do that?
-Cos you're a copper?
530
00:29:00,720 --> 00:29:02,680
And make things even tougher for meself?
531
00:29:09,840 --> 00:29:11,000
This is brilliant.
532
00:29:12,560 --> 00:29:13,480
Cheers, mate.
533
00:29:14,160 --> 00:29:16,520
-Good enough to submit, isn't it?
-Definitely.
534
00:29:17,720 --> 00:29:18,760
Where to?
535
00:29:18,840 --> 00:29:22,080
Online. There's a few different sites,
depending on what you're good at.
536
00:29:22,720 --> 00:29:23,560
What like?
537
00:29:24,680 --> 00:29:27,520
Couples, swingers, animals...
538
00:29:28,760 --> 00:29:29,640
Gay.
539
00:29:32,240 --> 00:29:33,760
Want to stick around for a beer?
540
00:29:34,320 --> 00:29:37,800
I am genuinely sorry
you think I've been ignoring you.
541
00:29:40,440 --> 00:29:44,360
But don't think of me badly, please.
We need each other,
542
00:29:44,440 --> 00:29:48,400
cos things are gonna be better
from now on, for both of us.
543
00:29:49,920 --> 00:29:53,040
I mean, we can join forces, kid.
544
00:29:53,720 --> 00:29:55,600
You know, you and me versus the world.
545
00:29:58,880 --> 00:30:01,320
Hey... our special pact!
546
00:30:01,880 --> 00:30:03,400
-[Carl] Debbie?
-[Debbie] Yeah?
547
00:30:04,120 --> 00:30:06,320
-What do you think you're playing at?
-What?
548
00:30:06,400 --> 00:30:09,080
-Arranging to go out with my bird.
-It's just a drink.
549
00:30:09,160 --> 00:30:10,720
I were gonna take her out tonight.
550
00:30:10,800 --> 00:30:14,320
-[Debbie] Oh, you're not jealous, are you?
-Am I fuck.
551
00:30:14,400 --> 00:30:15,280
[giggling]
552
00:30:16,880 --> 00:30:17,840
[door shuts]
553
00:30:18,560 --> 00:30:21,640
Promise me you'll always be there for me.
554
00:30:21,720 --> 00:30:24,040
-[opens can of beer]
-[Stella giggles]
555
00:30:29,520 --> 00:30:31,440
-[burp]
-[Stella giggles]
556
00:30:31,520 --> 00:30:33,080
One thing it has done, Paddy,
557
00:30:33,160 --> 00:30:36,080
is make me look at life
from an animal's perspective.
558
00:30:36,160 --> 00:30:38,360
Fuck Badger Watch! That's just boring.
559
00:30:39,040 --> 00:30:41,160
[Mimi's voice muffled]
It's weird how it sucks you in.
560
00:30:41,240 --> 00:30:44,120
They make you really feel
for the character, don't they?
561
00:30:44,200 --> 00:30:46,320
Just a splash of colour
and a squeaky voice,
562
00:30:46,400 --> 00:30:48,640
[snapping fingers]
and that's it, you're there.
563
00:30:48,720 --> 00:30:50,920
I could go on forever about this, Patrick.
564
00:30:51,000 --> 00:30:52,120
For infinity.
565
00:30:52,200 --> 00:30:56,440
You see, now I know
how it must have felt for Buzz Lightyear!
566
00:30:56,520 --> 00:30:58,800
-Mimi, would you do me a favour?
-Yeah.
567
00:30:58,880 --> 00:31:00,320
Shut the fuck up.
568
00:31:03,960 --> 00:31:05,000
He likes us.
569
00:31:06,600 --> 00:31:07,560
He's bright.
570
00:31:07,640 --> 00:31:08,520
[toilet flushes]
571
00:31:08,600 --> 00:31:09,440
He's cute.
572
00:31:11,880 --> 00:31:13,240
Your very own prodigy.
573
00:31:14,600 --> 00:31:15,720
Imagine. [chuckling]
574
00:31:16,640 --> 00:31:19,160
-Reckon he's game?
-Know he is.
575
00:31:24,400 --> 00:31:25,840
Micky, mate...
576
00:31:27,680 --> 00:31:29,280
Ever heard of a fuck buddy?
577
00:31:36,720 --> 00:31:37,880
Is anyone home?
578
00:31:37,960 --> 00:31:40,000
[indistinct TV chatter]
579
00:31:41,880 --> 00:31:43,560
[Meena laughing]
580
00:31:43,640 --> 00:31:45,800
-[video game playing]
-[Stan] Yeah, got it!
581
00:31:47,160 --> 00:31:48,640
What's going on in there, then?
582
00:31:48,720 --> 00:31:50,960
It's just a stew, you know. [giggling]
583
00:31:52,400 --> 00:31:53,680
[Meena] Come on, Chesney.
584
00:31:53,760 --> 00:31:54,920
Good day at school, Ches?
585
00:31:56,160 --> 00:31:57,080
Yes, good.
586
00:31:58,720 --> 00:31:59,640
Brilliant.
587
00:31:59,720 --> 00:32:01,120
-[bell rings]
-[Chesney] Yes!
588
00:32:01,720 --> 00:32:02,560
[exhales]
589
00:32:03,360 --> 00:32:05,520
-Didn't think you had it in you.
-Piece of piss.
590
00:32:10,760 --> 00:32:13,600
[dance music playing]
591
00:32:27,120 --> 00:32:28,120
[snorts]
592
00:32:54,400 --> 00:32:56,520
[Debbie] Right. One...
593
00:32:56,600 --> 00:32:58,800
-[Maxine] Two... [laughter]
-[Debbie] Three, go!
594
00:33:14,800 --> 00:33:17,680
Prowling grease monkeys at three o'clock.
595
00:33:17,760 --> 00:33:20,000
Eugh! He's old enough to be my dad.
596
00:33:22,440 --> 00:33:25,440
He just took his wedding ring off!
597
00:33:25,520 --> 00:33:27,480
[Debbie] Oh, the slimeball.
598
00:33:27,560 --> 00:33:29,960
-No harm in getting a drink out of it.
-Aw!
599
00:33:34,480 --> 00:33:35,760
[Kelly laughing]
600
00:33:39,480 --> 00:33:40,680
[indistinct conversation]
601
00:33:55,640 --> 00:33:57,520
[indistinct conversation]
602
00:34:02,760 --> 00:34:05,520
[groans] Read him the riot act, didn't I?
603
00:34:05,600 --> 00:34:09,280
He'll forgive a flash of tit
if it means that we're back on track.
604
00:34:09,360 --> 00:34:11,159
And are you?
605
00:34:11,239 --> 00:34:14,400
-What?
-Back on track.
606
00:34:14,480 --> 00:34:16,199
Sort of.
607
00:34:16,280 --> 00:34:17,960
[sniffs]
608
00:34:18,040 --> 00:34:20,080
Do you always do that?
609
00:34:20,159 --> 00:34:24,159
-What?
-Pout.
610
00:34:24,239 --> 00:34:26,560
-No.
-[chuckling]
611
00:34:26,639 --> 00:34:29,040
-Do you know what?
-What?
612
00:34:30,920 --> 00:34:34,320
I think you're dead fit.
613
00:34:44,520 --> 00:34:46,920
-[laughter]
-Fuck off!
614
00:34:47,000 --> 00:34:48,520
[indistinct conversation]
615
00:34:55,920 --> 00:34:57,920
[indistinct tv chatter]
616
00:34:58,000 --> 00:35:01,880
-She's been following me round.
-That's not good.
617
00:35:01,960 --> 00:35:03,800
Nightmare.
618
00:35:03,880 --> 00:35:05,720
She's round every corner.
619
00:35:07,080 --> 00:35:10,640
I think I was clingy
with my first big split.
620
00:35:10,720 --> 00:35:13,640
Something a bit pathetic
about all that, though.
621
00:35:13,720 --> 00:35:15,600
Don't you think?
622
00:35:18,160 --> 00:35:20,920
I thought you were really good today.
623
00:35:25,200 --> 00:35:26,800
[dance music playing]
624
00:36:03,040 --> 00:36:04,320
[Maxine shouts]
625
00:36:04,400 --> 00:36:07,040
[Debbie] Leg it! Drive! Quick! Go, go, go!
626
00:36:07,120 --> 00:36:08,560
She's got me fucking wallet!
627
00:36:10,600 --> 00:36:12,680
-Slags!
-Oh, fuck it!
628
00:36:22,080 --> 00:36:24,000
[laughter]
629
00:36:29,680 --> 00:36:30,520
Freak!
630
00:36:38,200 --> 00:36:40,680
All right! It should've been a woman.
631
00:36:40,760 --> 00:36:42,800
Ha! Can someone tape this?
632
00:36:42,880 --> 00:36:45,960
-Here, say it again.
-It doesn't matter now.
633
00:36:46,040 --> 00:36:49,480
-It's history.
-Yeah. It were a top night in the end.
634
00:36:49,560 --> 00:36:50,800
Does that mean I get an apology?
635
00:36:50,880 --> 00:36:52,960
-Oh! This I will have to film!
-[chuckling]
636
00:36:53,040 --> 00:36:56,400
I am the first to apologise
when I've done something wrong.
637
00:36:56,480 --> 00:36:59,200
[laughing out loud] Did you get that?
638
00:36:59,280 --> 00:37:02,360
-Leave it, Shane.
-"Leave it, Jamie," don't you mean?
639
00:37:06,320 --> 00:37:07,560
Mandy?
640
00:37:09,320 --> 00:37:10,800
Listen, I'm gonna take her home.
641
00:37:11,400 --> 00:37:14,160
-[all] Oh!
-No! Just take her home.
642
00:37:14,240 --> 00:37:16,240
[laughter]
643
00:37:22,960 --> 00:37:24,400
I'm off to bed.
644
00:37:25,320 --> 00:37:26,200
What, so early?
645
00:37:27,040 --> 00:37:30,360
-I'm knackered. You coming?
-In a bit.
646
00:37:34,920 --> 00:37:35,960
[sniffing]
647
00:37:40,800 --> 00:37:42,120
[laughing]
648
00:37:44,280 --> 00:37:45,320
Tequila?
649
00:37:46,160 --> 00:37:47,400
-Yeah!
-[both laughing]
650
00:37:48,520 --> 00:37:50,520
[Kelly laughing]
651
00:37:54,880 --> 00:37:56,760
[Kelly] Shh! In here!
652
00:38:02,400 --> 00:38:04,240
[Norma] What the...? Oh!
653
00:38:08,080 --> 00:38:09,000
Norma?
654
00:38:10,960 --> 00:38:14,080
Poor little mite will be in limbo forever
if I don't do something.
655
00:38:14,160 --> 00:38:15,120
What?
656
00:38:15,680 --> 00:38:16,560
Dead.
657
00:38:17,520 --> 00:38:18,480
All alone.
658
00:38:18,560 --> 00:38:21,920
My God! Stop being so fucking morbid!
What's the matter?
659
00:38:23,400 --> 00:38:24,240
A little baby.
660
00:38:24,960 --> 00:38:26,120
Someone's baby.
661
00:38:26,680 --> 00:38:28,600
It's not a baby. It's a fucking cat!
662
00:38:29,560 --> 00:38:30,400
[Norma] No.
663
00:38:30,480 --> 00:38:33,520
[Shane] Straight up, Norma.
Look, the ribcage is flat on both sides.
664
00:38:33,600 --> 00:38:36,360
The limbs are the wrong proportion.
It's a fuckin' moggy is that.
665
00:38:36,440 --> 00:38:39,400
[Kelly grunts] He's amazing, isn't he?
666
00:38:42,520 --> 00:38:44,360
[both laughing]
667
00:38:55,920 --> 00:38:57,640
-[Kelly] Shane!
-[Karen] Shh!
668
00:39:02,680 --> 00:39:05,640
[both chuckling]
669
00:39:10,960 --> 00:39:13,360
-Sorry, I can't.
-Yeah, you can.
670
00:39:13,440 --> 00:39:17,000
-I'm married.
-Yeah. To a moron.
671
00:39:18,000 --> 00:39:20,320
-What?
-Sorry, but--
672
00:39:20,400 --> 00:39:22,440
Get the fuck out of me pub!
673
00:39:23,880 --> 00:39:25,160
-What?
-Now!
674
00:39:33,120 --> 00:39:34,880
[Micky] I don't think I'll be coming
to class anymore.
675
00:39:36,920 --> 00:39:39,840
-[woman] Oh, no. Why not?
-It's not really my thing.
676
00:39:42,120 --> 00:39:45,360
I think you found your "thing" tonight,
though, don't you?
677
00:39:45,440 --> 00:39:46,720
Well, we're all good at something.
678
00:39:46,800 --> 00:39:50,440
It just takes some of us a little longer
to suss out what it is.
679
00:39:53,640 --> 00:39:54,840
Exactly.
680
00:39:54,920 --> 00:39:59,600
You could give my place
to someone what really needs it.
681
00:39:59,680 --> 00:40:00,920
Yeah, I could, really.
682
00:40:02,880 --> 00:40:04,720
Beer?
683
00:40:04,800 --> 00:40:08,360
[inhales] Yeah, go on, then.
684
00:40:08,440 --> 00:40:10,400
One for the road.
685
00:40:10,480 --> 00:40:12,120
You twisted me arm.
686
00:40:43,000 --> 00:40:44,360
Sorry for being a cow.
687
00:40:49,560 --> 00:40:50,680
I'm sorry, too.
688
00:41:05,240 --> 00:41:06,160
[Jamie moans]
689
00:41:27,840 --> 00:41:28,760
Nothing happened.
690
00:41:30,360 --> 00:41:32,520
-Good job.
-I'm a gent, you know.
691
00:41:34,040 --> 00:41:36,600
Be a right shame if we had,
and I couldn't even remember.
692
00:41:45,280 --> 00:41:46,200
Brew?
693
00:42:16,640 --> 00:42:17,520
What?
694
00:42:18,680 --> 00:42:19,520
Good night?
695
00:42:20,560 --> 00:42:21,440
Yeah.
696
00:42:23,800 --> 00:42:25,160
What are you playing at, Carl?
697
00:42:31,040 --> 00:42:31,960
Did you cop?
698
00:42:33,960 --> 00:42:36,280
Listen, Carl, we're mates, aren't we?
699
00:42:36,360 --> 00:42:39,080
"Mates"? With a bird? What about--?
700
00:42:39,160 --> 00:42:43,120
So we shagged! You were great.
But you're not me fella!
701
00:42:43,200 --> 00:42:46,120
So, don't go all moody-bollocks
just cos I got off me tits,
702
00:42:46,200 --> 00:42:48,320
and had a laugh without you,
because you can't.
703
00:42:50,680 --> 00:42:53,280
We might as well be mates, though,
if we like each other, don't you think?
704
00:42:55,000 --> 00:42:55,920
Suppose so.
705
00:42:58,680 --> 00:43:01,040
There might be the odd night...
706
00:43:01,120 --> 00:43:04,720
if you're lonely... and I'm lonely.
707
00:43:05,680 --> 00:43:08,000
You made me squeal.
708
00:43:08,080 --> 00:43:10,680
I'd be a fool not to.
709
00:43:10,760 --> 00:43:12,320
When you put it like that...
710
00:43:14,920 --> 00:43:18,560
Right. Any chance of a shag, then?
711
00:43:25,240 --> 00:43:26,480
[slurps]
712
00:43:39,200 --> 00:43:41,160
[Karen screams and laughs]
713
00:43:43,680 --> 00:43:45,120
-[Jamie] Whoa!
-[Karen screams]
714
00:43:45,840 --> 00:43:49,280
[Micky] Maybe, after all,
I am into all that bullshit.
715
00:43:49,360 --> 00:43:51,840
Just another way of looking at things.
716
00:43:51,920 --> 00:43:57,360
Things happen for a reason.
The best things come to those who wait.
717
00:43:57,440 --> 00:44:00,800
Sounds so fake, though, dunnit?
718
00:44:00,880 --> 00:44:03,640
-"'Check out the girth on that', she said,
-[slapping]
719
00:44:03,720 --> 00:44:06,480
as he put the big black stallion
back in its stable.
720
00:44:06,560 --> 00:44:07,360
[whinnies]
721
00:44:07,440 --> 00:44:11,800
She tossed back her glorious mane of hair,
and opened the top two buttons.
722
00:44:11,880 --> 00:44:15,040
'I'm hot, baby,' she said.
723
00:44:15,120 --> 00:44:18,080
As he caught a glimpse
of the top of her huge tits...
724
00:44:18,160 --> 00:44:20,120
[Micky]
I'll tell you what my philosophy is.
725
00:44:20,200 --> 00:44:22,760
You're born. Then you die.
726
00:44:22,840 --> 00:44:25,680
In between,
you might as well do whatever it takes
727
00:44:25,760 --> 00:44:28,440
to get as much of a buzz as you can.
Dead simple.
728
00:44:28,520 --> 00:44:30,520
[teacher] So, if you look at all three...
729
00:44:35,680 --> 00:44:37,080
[all] Whoo!
730
00:44:37,160 --> 00:44:38,160
[snoring]
731
00:44:39,520 --> 00:44:41,040
Fuck!
732
00:44:45,040 --> 00:44:48,880
[Stan] You are a very lucky man.
And eligible for the jury service.
733
00:44:48,960 --> 00:44:50,560
-All right, Frank?
-All right, Dessie.
734
00:44:50,640 --> 00:44:52,920
And all those who think
the defendant's not guilty?
735
00:44:53,000 --> 00:44:54,320
-What you up to?
-It's a free country.
736
00:44:54,400 --> 00:44:55,480
[screaming]
737
00:44:56,240 --> 00:44:57,640
There's no way out!
738
00:44:57,720 --> 00:44:59,080
[screams]
739
00:44:59,160 --> 00:45:00,320
[slam]
740
00:45:00,400 --> 00:45:01,520
I'm concentrating on my writing.
741
00:45:01,600 --> 00:45:03,400
-What kind of stories?
-Erotica.
742
00:45:03,480 --> 00:45:04,400
[spews]
743
00:45:04,480 --> 00:45:09,520
"And plunged his throbbing member
deep and hard, into the grateful copper."
744
00:45:09,600 --> 00:45:10,840
[screams and moans]
745
00:45:52,040 --> 00:45:53,880
That's fucking brilliant, bud.
746
00:45:55,320 --> 00:45:57,240
Get on, Micky! Your turn.
747
00:45:57,320 --> 00:45:58,800
-[whinnies]
-[slapping]
748
00:46:02,320 --> 00:46:03,840
[slapping]
749
00:46:03,920 --> 00:46:05,680
Yeah!
750
00:46:06,320 --> 00:46:07,720
Whoo!
54976
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