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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:04,162 WWW.MY-SUBS.COM 1 00:00:00,031 --> 00:00:02,414 Dude, why does your mom make us shop 2 00:00:02,460 --> 00:00:04,554 at my rival grocery store? 3 00:00:04,633 --> 00:00:06,437 They steal my best workers... 4 00:00:09,771 --> 00:00:13,800 "And they stack stuff where even very" C-O... 5 00:00:13,875 --> 00:00:16,242 "coordinated people knock into them." 6 00:00:16,344 --> 00:00:20,213 Dude, JJ, I love when you let me save face. 7 00:00:20,315 --> 00:00:21,948 Oh, JJ, exciting news. 8 00:00:22,050 --> 00:00:24,284 "Open bag of cookies 9 00:00:24,386 --> 00:00:27,854 or a stranger you can mold in your image?" 10 00:00:27,956 --> 00:00:29,389 Ah, both. 11 00:00:29,457 --> 00:00:32,191 Yeah, your special-needs Mother Teresa has a new cause. 12 00:00:32,294 --> 00:00:33,426 You're gonna help me. 13 00:00:33,495 --> 00:00:35,228 It's a father and his son, who's disabled... 14 00:00:35,330 --> 00:00:36,262 they're new to town. 15 00:00:36,364 --> 00:00:37,430 They're going through a hard time. 16 00:00:37,499 --> 00:00:38,665 The kid's having trouble making friends at school. 17 00:00:38,733 --> 00:00:41,668 At my store, people mind their own business and shop. 18 00:00:41,770 --> 00:00:43,236 The kid wants to be a stand-up comedian, 19 00:00:43,305 --> 00:00:45,872 except because he's in a wheelchair, he said... 20 00:00:45,974 --> 00:00:47,507 "He said sit-down comedian." 21 00:00:47,576 --> 00:00:48,741 Oh, it was new to me. 22 00:00:48,810 --> 00:00:50,443 Anyway, make his day. 23 00:00:50,512 --> 00:00:51,778 Tell him his dreams will come true. 24 00:00:51,846 --> 00:00:53,913 Be his role model, except spelled... 25 00:00:54,015 --> 00:00:55,882 "R-O-L-L." 26 00:00:55,984 --> 00:00:57,517 Well, I'm sorry if you've heard every great joke ever. 27 00:00:57,586 --> 00:01:00,386 "Getting in other people's business is your thing. 28 00:01:00,455 --> 00:01:01,721 - I don't..." - Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh! 29 00:01:01,823 --> 00:01:03,289 Owen, this is JJ. 30 00:01:03,391 --> 00:01:04,557 Hi, JJ. 31 00:01:04,626 --> 00:01:06,893 It's a "wheel" pleasure. 32 00:01:08,430 --> 00:01:11,195 "A wheel pleasure." Good one, Owen. 33 00:01:11,265 --> 00:01:12,265 You know what? 34 00:01:12,334 --> 00:01:13,333 JJ will be the first to tell you 35 00:01:13,401 --> 00:01:14,534 that you can go anywhere. 36 00:01:14,603 --> 00:01:16,636 You could go anywhere in the world. 37 00:01:16,705 --> 00:01:17,837 I... 38 00:01:20,976 --> 00:01:23,776 For example, to produce. 39 00:01:24,713 --> 00:01:25,612 Colin. 40 00:01:25,714 --> 00:01:27,380 You look well. 41 00:01:32,721 --> 00:01:35,622 Synced & corrected by kinglouisxx www.MY-SUBS.com 42 00:01:36,925 --> 00:01:39,092 Welcome, everybody, to the Annual 43 00:01:39,194 --> 00:01:42,495 It's Been Here A Year So Now It's Ours Luggage Giveaway. 44 00:01:42,597 --> 00:01:43,696 You guys will go first. 45 00:01:43,798 --> 00:01:45,131 Like lions in the jungle, 46 00:01:45,233 --> 00:01:47,533 I wait until my pride has had its fill. 47 00:01:47,636 --> 00:01:48,768 Let's go over the rules. 48 00:01:48,870 --> 00:01:49,802 Don't die! 49 00:01:49,904 --> 00:01:50,803 Go! 50 00:02:03,051 --> 00:02:04,017 Suckers! 51 00:02:04,119 --> 00:02:06,686 I wanted this year-old banana. 52 00:02:10,792 --> 00:02:12,625 Roar. 53 00:02:12,727 --> 00:02:15,495 Behold, my prize! 54 00:02:15,597 --> 00:02:16,663 Cool box, Dad. 55 00:02:16,765 --> 00:02:17,864 "Great corners." 56 00:02:17,966 --> 00:02:20,299 Perhaps I can turn it into my study. 57 00:02:20,402 --> 00:02:23,069 So sad. Not the box, what's inside it. 58 00:02:23,171 --> 00:02:25,171 Again, behold... 59 00:02:25,273 --> 00:02:27,540 It's just kind of more awkward than it is heavy. 60 00:02:27,642 --> 00:02:28,908 Yeah. 61 00:02:29,010 --> 00:02:30,543 Yeah, stunned silence. 62 00:02:30,645 --> 00:02:35,615 60 inches of HDR 4K UHD... 63 00:02:35,717 --> 00:02:37,784 stuff for me. 64 00:02:37,886 --> 00:02:38,885 A Jimmy. 65 00:02:38,987 --> 00:02:40,753 I always knew I was special. 66 00:02:40,855 --> 00:02:42,822 I just... I just wasn't sure how, 67 00:02:42,924 --> 00:02:44,857 but I'm a guy with a big TV. 68 00:02:44,926 --> 00:02:47,527 "World's Best Garbage Fights" is gonna look incredible, Dad. 69 00:02:47,629 --> 00:02:49,696 Hmm. 70 00:02:49,764 --> 00:02:51,664 Seeing the big TV in here kind of makes everything else 71 00:02:51,766 --> 00:02:53,299 look, well, worse. 72 00:02:53,401 --> 00:02:55,401 Okay. 73 00:02:55,470 --> 00:02:57,236 Why don't we clean the place up a little bit, you know? 74 00:02:57,338 --> 00:02:58,905 Make it worthy of the TV. 75 00:03:00,175 --> 00:03:01,274 Biggest helper gets the box. 76 00:03:01,376 --> 00:03:03,976 - Wait, wait! - Hands off my study! 77 00:03:04,079 --> 00:03:05,044 Get off! 78 00:03:05,146 --> 00:03:06,679 Forget that you lost it... 79 00:03:06,781 --> 00:03:08,948 why even take my graphing calculator? 80 00:03:09,017 --> 00:03:10,717 You've got a machine that, upside-down, 81 00:03:10,785 --> 00:03:12,518 spells "hell" and "boob-less," Ray. 82 00:03:12,587 --> 00:03:14,954 - I'm not supposed to show that off? - Whoa! 83 00:03:15,023 --> 00:03:17,323 - Guys, wait up. - Where did those girls come from? 84 00:03:17,425 --> 00:03:19,459 Is this school hot at night? 85 00:03:19,561 --> 00:03:21,828 No, Ray. No. 86 00:03:21,930 --> 00:03:23,763 Let's go home. I'm starving. 87 00:03:23,832 --> 00:03:25,807 Dylan, when you see a group of girls that hot 88 00:03:25,901 --> 00:03:26,999 walk through a door, 89 00:03:27,068 --> 00:03:29,001 you also walk through that door. 90 00:03:30,271 --> 00:03:32,171 I was thinking balloon drop. 91 00:03:32,240 --> 00:03:35,308 Oh, it's your new mentor, JJ. 92 00:03:35,410 --> 00:03:36,642 Oh, JJ, you remember them. 93 00:03:36,745 --> 00:03:38,344 Owen's got a birthday party coming up, 94 00:03:38,413 --> 00:03:41,013 and he's a bit worried that no one's gonna show up. 95 00:03:41,116 --> 00:03:42,782 So we're just brainstorming ideas. 96 00:03:42,884 --> 00:03:46,252 I'm gonna pop out of a big box and perform a comedy act. 97 00:03:46,321 --> 00:03:49,322 He's got this killer bit about if classic movie quotes 98 00:03:49,424 --> 00:03:50,857 were said by people with disabilities. 99 00:03:50,925 --> 00:03:51,791 Go on. Take it away, Owen. 100 00:03:51,893 --> 00:03:53,760 I'm not walkin' here! 101 00:03:55,096 --> 00:03:57,230 'Cause he's not. 102 00:03:57,298 --> 00:03:58,531 Anyway, in addition to CP, 103 00:03:58,600 --> 00:03:59,632 JJ also has a condition 104 00:03:59,701 --> 00:04:01,901 whereby he scowls at delightful things. 105 00:04:03,371 --> 00:04:04,604 Just a moment. 106 00:04:04,672 --> 00:04:05,772 JJ. 107 00:04:05,874 --> 00:04:08,007 He's nervous about his birthday party. 108 00:04:08,076 --> 00:04:10,143 Tell him you love the popping out of the box idea. 109 00:04:10,211 --> 00:04:14,411 "I told you I'm not mentor material." 110 00:04:14,497 --> 00:04:16,616 All right, well, can you just tell him that he's hilarious? 111 00:04:16,684 --> 00:04:18,050 That you had to leave the room 112 00:04:18,119 --> 00:04:20,286 because you peed your pants laughing? 113 00:04:20,355 --> 00:04:22,688 JJ, you had people who helped you. 114 00:04:22,791 --> 00:04:23,923 What would they think 115 00:04:23,992 --> 00:04:25,591 if they knew you couldn't be bothered to help others? 116 00:04:27,162 --> 00:04:30,029 "They never lied to me. 117 00:04:30,131 --> 00:04:33,566 You didn't. You were honest. 118 00:04:33,668 --> 00:04:36,736 You made me believe in myself. 119 00:04:36,805 --> 00:04:37,937 Do that for him." 120 00:04:42,377 --> 00:04:44,277 Right. Let's hear some more great comedy. 121 00:04:44,345 --> 00:04:47,180 Houston, we have a mobility problem. 122 00:04:49,584 --> 00:04:51,017 Nah, I'm right. 123 00:04:59,727 --> 00:05:01,294 Ray, be cool. 124 00:05:01,362 --> 00:05:04,030 Yeah, this is when that happens. 125 00:05:04,098 --> 00:05:06,098 Excuse me, what are all of these attractive people 126 00:05:06,201 --> 00:05:07,266 gathered here for? 127 00:05:07,368 --> 00:05:09,068 It's a support group for teens. 128 00:05:09,170 --> 00:05:11,737 Whatever you're struggling with, we're here for you. 129 00:05:11,840 --> 00:05:14,507 So, I can join and none of them can leave? 130 00:05:14,609 --> 00:05:17,276 No, they're free to leave any time. 131 00:05:17,345 --> 00:05:19,378 - But they might not leave. - I guess. 132 00:05:19,480 --> 00:05:21,013 Awesome. 133 00:05:21,115 --> 00:05:23,282 Yes, I could use some support. 134 00:05:23,351 --> 00:05:25,551 What? Ray, no. We don't n... 135 00:05:25,620 --> 00:05:28,254 - Are those pizzas for the group? - Sure are. 136 00:05:28,323 --> 00:05:29,989 My parents just died. 137 00:05:30,091 --> 00:05:31,657 Meat lover's, please. 138 00:05:34,095 --> 00:05:36,095 Wow! I feel like I walked into a catalogue 139 00:05:36,197 --> 00:05:38,497 for slightly fancy homes. 140 00:05:38,566 --> 00:05:40,366 Nah, it's just a couple little things 141 00:05:40,468 --> 00:05:42,468 to bring the room up to par with the TV. 142 00:05:42,537 --> 00:05:44,303 I wall-mounted it over the mantle 143 00:05:44,405 --> 00:05:45,671 for optimal viewing angles, 144 00:05:45,773 --> 00:05:47,707 installed drapes to reduce glare, 145 00:05:47,809 --> 00:05:48,841 cool sound bar. 146 00:05:48,943 --> 00:05:50,509 Feels like a lot of work for a TV. 147 00:05:50,578 --> 00:05:53,279 Kenneth, it's a lot of work because of a TV. 148 00:05:53,348 --> 00:05:54,647 Thanks to Big TV, 149 00:05:54,749 --> 00:05:56,115 this room has never looked better. 150 00:05:56,217 --> 00:05:58,417 I mean, now the dumpiest thing in here is... 151 00:05:59,520 --> 00:06:00,586 is me. 152 00:06:00,655 --> 00:06:02,855 Thank you, Big TV. 153 00:06:02,957 --> 00:06:04,357 I know what I must do. 154 00:06:08,663 --> 00:06:10,229 Hey, bud. 155 00:06:10,298 --> 00:06:14,100 Aww, little JJ. 156 00:06:16,170 --> 00:06:19,872 "I was thinking about" H... "helping that kid. 157 00:06:19,941 --> 00:06:23,342 I think my mom's wrong how she's handling it. 158 00:06:23,411 --> 00:06:25,144 And people did help me." 159 00:06:25,213 --> 00:06:26,345 Hey, buddy. 160 00:06:26,414 --> 00:06:28,281 You had me at "Mom's wrong." 161 00:06:30,169 --> 00:06:31,185 Well, who's that? 162 00:06:31,252 --> 00:06:33,819 "Me and the right kind of role model. 163 00:06:33,922 --> 00:06:36,722 The first wheelchair-user in space." 164 00:06:36,824 --> 00:06:39,125 The first what now? 165 00:06:39,227 --> 00:06:40,359 "Willy O'Groat. 166 00:06:40,461 --> 00:06:41,694 You've heard of him." 167 00:06:41,763 --> 00:06:44,096 You think I would have. 168 00:06:46,000 --> 00:06:48,267 I-I just thought those guys 169 00:06:48,336 --> 00:06:51,771 had some pretty specific physical requirements. 170 00:06:51,873 --> 00:06:53,906 So he brought the chair up there or...? 171 00:06:54,008 --> 00:06:55,041 "Didn't need to. 172 00:06:55,143 --> 00:06:57,009 Zero gravity." Ah. 173 00:06:57,111 --> 00:06:59,912 "We ran into him in a diner." 174 00:07:00,014 --> 00:07:01,047 Uh-huh. 175 00:07:01,115 --> 00:07:02,448 He had the helmet there with him. 176 00:07:02,517 --> 00:07:04,250 That's convenient. 177 00:07:04,352 --> 00:07:06,719 "Uh, he told me everything. 178 00:07:06,821 --> 00:07:07,987 Well, his aide did." 179 00:07:08,089 --> 00:07:10,323 Huh, he's non-verbal, too. 180 00:07:10,391 --> 00:07:15,528 What a perfect person for you to run into, JJ. 181 00:07:19,701 --> 00:07:21,334 Mm-hmm. 182 00:07:22,403 --> 00:07:23,636 "Willy O'Groat." 183 00:07:23,738 --> 00:07:25,471 What about The Commander? 184 00:07:25,573 --> 00:07:26,672 "I miss him. 185 00:07:26,774 --> 00:07:29,175 I'd like to visit him." 186 00:07:30,144 --> 00:07:31,444 Oh, well, he has died. 187 00:07:31,546 --> 00:07:33,312 He has taken his place among the stars. 188 00:07:33,381 --> 00:07:37,750 "I'd like to pay my respects to his super-model wife." 189 00:07:37,852 --> 00:07:40,886 Well, she, too, has passed. Soon after he. 190 00:07:40,989 --> 00:07:42,088 Broken heart. Such was their love. 191 00:07:42,190 --> 00:07:43,923 "I'd like to visit his grave." 192 00:07:44,025 --> 00:07:45,858 Inaccessible cemetery. 193 00:07:45,960 --> 00:07:47,693 Ironically. 194 00:07:47,795 --> 00:07:48,894 "You're sure?" 195 00:07:52,433 --> 00:07:54,400 "I'd hate to think that something 196 00:07:54,502 --> 00:07:57,837 that made me believe in myself was fake." 197 00:07:59,841 --> 00:08:03,912 "That the person I trust most played me for a fool." 198 00:08:04,612 --> 00:08:07,896 Houston, we do have a mobility problem after all. 199 00:08:09,036 --> 00:08:11,840 A-And that's why I switched lunch tables. 200 00:08:11,919 --> 00:08:13,451 It's made all the difference. 201 00:08:13,520 --> 00:08:16,066 Good for you, Tara. That was a real breakthrough. 202 00:08:16,152 --> 00:08:17,933 So, so brave. 203 00:08:18,012 --> 00:08:19,278 The same thing happened to me. 204 00:08:19,380 --> 00:08:21,898 - That was so brave, too. - Yeah. 205 00:08:21,976 --> 00:08:24,817 Um, I've noticed the redhead hasn't been brave yet. 206 00:08:24,867 --> 00:08:25,910 I don't get it. 207 00:08:25,935 --> 00:08:27,968 Why not just get a cheese pizza 208 00:08:28,037 --> 00:08:29,637 if you're gonna pick off all the 'ronis? 209 00:08:29,706 --> 00:08:31,772 Wait. Is that, like, your problem? 210 00:08:31,841 --> 00:08:34,175 Eh? 211 00:08:34,277 --> 00:08:35,843 Nice, right? 212 00:08:47,056 --> 00:08:48,756 What? 213 00:08:50,426 --> 00:08:51,625 No, I-I... You're right. 214 00:08:51,661 --> 00:08:53,394 I guess it is a shame to watch something so trashy 215 00:08:53,496 --> 00:08:54,895 on a... on a TV this nice. 216 00:08:56,099 --> 00:08:57,498 Passes to Johnson. 217 00:08:57,567 --> 00:08:59,752 He shoots, BB and he sticks the 3. 218 00:09:00,703 --> 00:09:02,072 Forget. And then... 219 00:09:02,105 --> 00:09:03,070 Nice. 220 00:09:08,311 --> 00:09:10,010 Okay, that's enough TV for now. 221 00:09:10,079 --> 00:09:11,746 Jimmy! Tell my son I love him. 222 00:09:11,848 --> 00:09:12,980 Tell the TV I don't need him. 223 00:09:13,082 --> 00:09:15,382 "If the astronaut was fake, 224 00:09:15,451 --> 00:09:18,089 how many other lies did you tell me? 225 00:09:18,168 --> 00:09:20,054 - List them." - List my lies? 226 00:09:20,156 --> 00:09:21,222 Do you ask Kobayashi 227 00:09:21,324 --> 00:09:22,890 to list every hot dog he ever ate? 228 00:09:22,992 --> 00:09:24,339 I don't catalogue my lies. 229 00:09:24,420 --> 00:09:25,986 "My 9th birthday party... 230 00:09:26,055 --> 00:09:29,390 I was new at school, but tons of kids came. 231 00:09:29,492 --> 00:09:30,758 Was that you? 232 00:09:30,827 --> 00:09:35,062 Was I even pen pals with FDR?" 233 00:09:35,164 --> 00:09:37,598 "Dear JJ, if I can be president in a wheelchair, so can you. 234 00:09:37,667 --> 00:09:39,667 Also, please stop telling your mom 235 00:09:39,769 --> 00:09:41,235 her food tastes like farts." 236 00:09:41,304 --> 00:09:43,919 "I trusted you. You betrayed me." 237 00:09:43,989 --> 00:09:45,906 You know what? I worked very hard on those lies, 238 00:09:45,975 --> 00:09:47,708 so I think I deserve a little bit of recognition just... 239 00:09:47,777 --> 00:09:49,810 - Mm, weird angle. - You know, I'm just trying stuff. 240 00:09:49,879 --> 00:09:51,445 JJ, look, I'm sorry. 241 00:09:51,514 --> 00:09:53,948 Just tell me how I can make it up to you. 242 00:09:54,016 --> 00:09:55,783 "There's nothing you can do for me, 243 00:09:55,852 --> 00:09:58,686 but you can stop Owen's dad from doing it to him." 244 00:09:58,788 --> 00:10:00,588 Oh, thank you, darling. I'll call him right now. 245 00:10:01,657 --> 00:10:04,058 Please, can I keep lying to your brother and sister? 246 00:10:04,126 --> 00:10:06,594 Oh, God. Thank you. 247 00:10:06,696 --> 00:10:07,561 Oh, thank you, darling. 248 00:10:07,630 --> 00:10:09,330 Dylan, success. 249 00:10:09,432 --> 00:10:10,564 I got a girl's name. 250 00:10:10,666 --> 00:10:11,498 Don't you mean number? 251 00:10:11,601 --> 00:10:13,334 I'm not Michael Fassbender. 252 00:10:13,436 --> 00:10:15,502 Her name is Tara, and it's not fake. 253 00:10:15,605 --> 00:10:17,671 I shouted it, and she flinched. 254 00:10:17,773 --> 00:10:19,707 Everyone, let's gather back up. 255 00:10:19,809 --> 00:10:23,177 So, we have some new faces. 256 00:10:23,246 --> 00:10:25,746 Would anyone care to share why they're here? 257 00:10:25,815 --> 00:10:28,315 Oh, us? 258 00:10:28,384 --> 00:10:29,650 Nah. We're good. 259 00:10:29,719 --> 00:10:33,787 Not so good that it's weird that we're here. 260 00:10:33,856 --> 00:10:36,757 She's really the one with all the problems. 261 00:10:36,859 --> 00:10:39,426 I mean, I can think of some problems. 262 00:10:39,495 --> 00:10:42,796 I lost my calculator, and I cannot deal, 263 00:10:42,899 --> 00:10:44,899 and, you know, my younger sister 264 00:10:44,967 --> 00:10:47,534 is just so much cooler than me. 265 00:10:47,637 --> 00:10:49,503 I cry in my sleep and don't know it. 266 00:10:49,605 --> 00:10:50,838 Seriously? 267 00:10:50,907 --> 00:10:52,907 Just a ginormous mess. 268 00:10:53,009 --> 00:10:54,341 Wow. Thank you for sharing. 269 00:10:54,443 --> 00:10:55,676 I validate your feelings, 270 00:10:55,745 --> 00:10:57,845 but you are great just the way you are, 271 00:10:57,947 --> 00:11:00,848 and we are thrilled that you're here. 272 00:11:00,917 --> 00:11:02,883 Really? 273 00:11:02,952 --> 00:11:03,984 That's so nice. 274 00:11:07,690 --> 00:11:10,524 I'll take my touch before I share, if that's okay. 275 00:11:10,626 --> 00:11:13,060 Jimmy. 276 00:11:13,162 --> 00:11:14,995 Jimmy. 277 00:11:15,097 --> 00:11:16,363 Jimmy! 278 00:11:16,432 --> 00:11:18,799 I said, did you see last night's "World's Best Garbage Fights"? 279 00:11:18,901 --> 00:11:20,834 Bet it looks pretty sweet on that new screen. 280 00:11:20,937 --> 00:11:22,903 Yeah, yeah. I saw it. 281 00:11:23,005 --> 00:11:24,905 Yeah, it's like the trash is in the room with you. 282 00:11:25,007 --> 00:11:27,541 I missed it. Which episode was it? 283 00:11:27,643 --> 00:11:30,077 I said I saw it, Rod! 284 00:11:30,146 --> 00:11:31,712 Break's over! 285 00:11:34,450 --> 00:11:37,418 Oh, hey, Dylan, about the whole teen group thing... 286 00:11:37,520 --> 00:11:40,621 I was thinking if I wore softer, more inviting clothes 287 00:11:40,723 --> 00:11:42,122 I'd get more touches. 288 00:11:42,224 --> 00:11:43,624 Can you tell this is Mom's? 289 00:11:43,693 --> 00:11:44,625 No. 290 00:11:44,694 --> 00:11:46,026 Ray, about the group, 291 00:11:46,128 --> 00:11:47,328 they seemed to get a lot from it. 292 00:11:47,430 --> 00:11:49,296 I don't feel right taking advantage of them. 293 00:11:49,365 --> 00:11:50,698 That's very noble of you, Dylan. 294 00:11:50,800 --> 00:11:53,400 Ooh, that puts your wardrobe on the table. 295 00:11:53,502 --> 00:11:55,302 Whatcha got soft-pants-wise? 296 00:11:55,404 --> 00:11:56,904 You're not listening. It's over. 297 00:11:57,006 --> 00:11:58,105 You're not going back, either. 298 00:11:58,207 --> 00:11:59,239 The heck I'm not. 299 00:11:59,308 --> 00:12:01,758 I don't know where you suddenly got a conscience, 300 00:12:01,837 --> 00:12:03,644 but this is working. I'm going back. 301 00:12:03,722 --> 00:12:05,063 I don't expect you to get it, Ray, 302 00:12:05,141 --> 00:12:06,280 but I'm strong, 303 00:12:06,349 --> 00:12:08,148 and it's my job to look out for the weak. 304 00:12:08,250 --> 00:12:10,335 - It's over. - Look out for me. 305 00:12:10,413 --> 00:12:11,525 I'm wearing Mom's sweater 306 00:12:11,587 --> 00:12:13,253 so some girl will touch my arm. 307 00:12:13,356 --> 00:12:15,222 What could be more weak? 308 00:12:15,324 --> 00:12:17,658 Oh, thanks for coming over, Corey. 309 00:12:17,760 --> 00:12:18,859 No, thank you. 310 00:12:18,961 --> 00:12:20,294 I'm grateful to have as much time 311 00:12:20,363 --> 00:12:21,628 with my mentor as possible. 312 00:12:21,697 --> 00:12:23,797 I already did everything you told me to last time. 313 00:12:23,899 --> 00:12:25,933 I know. Very cool, very cool. Yeah. 314 00:12:26,035 --> 00:12:28,869 Uh, but, now if you could just undo it all. 315 00:12:28,971 --> 00:12:30,504 Wait, what? 316 00:12:30,573 --> 00:12:32,973 Tell Owen that JJ's not a comedian 317 00:12:33,075 --> 00:12:34,875 and don't manufacture victories for him. 318 00:12:34,944 --> 00:12:38,145 So don't bribe kids to come to his party? 319 00:12:38,214 --> 00:12:39,880 No. They'll come on their own. 320 00:12:39,949 --> 00:12:41,582 And the ones that don't, you don't want them anyway. 321 00:12:41,632 --> 00:12:42,693 - We'll be there. - I guess you're right. 322 00:12:42,718 --> 00:12:44,385 I mean, the whole "write a letter 323 00:12:44,487 --> 00:12:46,754 and pretend to be FDR" thing was obviously dumb. 324 00:12:46,856 --> 00:12:48,188 Owen saw through it right away. 325 00:12:48,290 --> 00:12:50,190 "Bra-freaking-vo." 326 00:12:52,628 --> 00:12:53,961 But everything else? 327 00:12:54,063 --> 00:12:55,396 No, just no lies. 328 00:12:55,498 --> 00:12:56,697 And I shouldn't tell him 329 00:12:56,766 --> 00:12:58,232 that the Lakers want to come to his party 330 00:12:58,300 --> 00:12:59,500 but they all got sick? 331 00:12:59,568 --> 00:13:03,070 It was real when it happened to you, actually. 332 00:13:05,007 --> 00:13:06,036 Let's take a seat. 333 00:13:08,602 --> 00:13:12,160 I told you not to come back here, Ray. 334 00:13:12,246 --> 00:13:13,580 You came here to stop me? 335 00:13:13,699 --> 00:13:14,715 Let's go. 336 00:13:14,817 --> 00:13:15,983 I'm staying. 337 00:13:16,052 --> 00:13:18,085 I am this close to finding out Tara's last name. 338 00:13:18,187 --> 00:13:20,254 Whoa, I forgot to think of something to share. 339 00:13:20,356 --> 00:13:23,057 Uh, uh, disease, parents' divorce, 340 00:13:23,159 --> 00:13:25,125 motorcycle accident... I'm on fire. 341 00:13:25,227 --> 00:13:26,756 Maybe I was on fire... 342 00:13:26,842 --> 00:13:28,495 Okay, who'd like to kick us off? 343 00:13:30,332 --> 00:13:31,432 You found it. 344 00:13:31,500 --> 00:13:33,701 Which piece should I rip off first? 345 00:13:35,738 --> 00:13:38,272 I'll see you in upside-down 7-7-3-4. 346 00:13:38,374 --> 00:13:40,240 My parents got a divorce because of my disease, 347 00:13:40,342 --> 00:13:42,042 - and I have a motorcycle... - Liar! 348 00:13:42,144 --> 00:13:44,711 His parents are not divorced, he can barely ride a bicycle, 349 00:13:44,780 --> 00:13:46,980 and the only reason he came here was to meet you girls... 350 00:13:47,083 --> 00:13:50,617 who, please explain to me why... are truly all hot... 351 00:13:50,719 --> 00:13:51,919 Her parents aren't dead. 352 00:13:51,987 --> 00:13:54,054 I've seen them, and they are beautiful. 353 00:13:54,156 --> 00:13:56,423 Please go, and don't come back. 354 00:13:58,461 --> 00:14:01,028 And a lot of them came from the same modelling school. 355 00:14:02,364 --> 00:14:04,098 What school? 356 00:14:04,200 --> 00:14:06,166 What schooooool?! 357 00:14:07,503 --> 00:14:08,802 Sounds like a rocking party. 358 00:14:08,904 --> 00:14:10,370 Omar, get over here. 359 00:14:10,473 --> 00:14:11,872 Bring the crew. 360 00:14:13,943 --> 00:14:15,309 Thanks for coming! 361 00:14:15,411 --> 00:14:17,644 Are we early? Where is everyone? 362 00:14:17,746 --> 00:14:19,213 It started an hour ago. Nobody came. 363 00:14:19,315 --> 00:14:20,848 This is a huge disaster. 364 00:14:20,950 --> 00:14:22,816 Why are you blasting music? 365 00:14:22,918 --> 00:14:25,085 So Owen won't notice there's nobody here. 366 00:14:25,187 --> 00:14:27,788 What do I do? Owen's gonna see this at some point. 367 00:14:27,890 --> 00:14:28,956 Do you mean he's not here yet? 368 00:14:29,058 --> 00:14:30,691 Well, great. That means we've got time. 369 00:14:30,793 --> 00:14:32,593 Not really. 370 00:14:32,695 --> 00:14:35,662 Oh... no. 371 00:14:35,764 --> 00:14:38,999 Okay, who's ready for some comedy? 372 00:14:39,101 --> 00:14:41,435 Drum roll please! 373 00:14:46,642 --> 00:14:48,942 Sure is a good thing we were honest. 374 00:14:51,080 --> 00:14:54,124 Omar, dude, turn around. 375 00:14:54,658 --> 00:14:56,400 Unbelievable. I was surrounded 376 00:14:56,463 --> 00:14:59,306 by a group of beautiful girls giving me a shot, 377 00:14:59,377 --> 00:15:00,543 and you had to ruin it. 378 00:15:00,645 --> 00:15:01,911 I ruin it. 379 00:15:01,979 --> 00:15:03,746 I told you not to go back there. 380 00:15:03,814 --> 00:15:05,948 Look, you've done a lot to me over the years, Dylan. 381 00:15:06,050 --> 00:15:07,349 I've had a lot of ice cream cones 382 00:15:07,418 --> 00:15:08,517 slapped out of my hands, 383 00:15:08,586 --> 00:15:10,452 been lured into a lot of pits, 384 00:15:10,521 --> 00:15:13,422 but to follow me there just to sabotage me... 385 00:15:13,524 --> 00:15:15,624 I didn't go there for you! I went for me! 386 00:15:15,726 --> 00:15:17,760 I wanted to talk about my feelings. 387 00:15:17,862 --> 00:15:19,562 You have feelings? 388 00:15:19,630 --> 00:15:21,430 Yeah, they started coming in about a year ago. 389 00:15:21,499 --> 00:15:23,732 I hate it. Everything is changing. 390 00:15:23,801 --> 00:15:26,302 I'm fresh out of baby teeth, and I feel stuff. 391 00:15:26,404 --> 00:15:28,604 I could've really used that group, Ray. 392 00:15:28,673 --> 00:15:30,472 I wanted to have one of those breakthrough things, 393 00:15:30,541 --> 00:15:31,974 but you took that from me. 394 00:15:33,077 --> 00:15:36,345 And you couldn't even wait until the pizza came! 395 00:15:36,447 --> 00:15:38,214 I'm starving! 396 00:15:38,282 --> 00:15:42,851 And now the act you've been waiting for! 397 00:15:42,954 --> 00:15:46,655 Owen, with musical guest, Sia! 398 00:15:46,757 --> 00:15:47,656 I never promised a musical guest. 399 00:15:47,758 --> 00:15:49,191 I have no idea where he got that. 400 00:15:51,529 --> 00:15:54,463 - Hurray! - Yay! 401 00:15:54,565 --> 00:15:56,799 Where is everyone? 402 00:15:56,867 --> 00:15:59,301 "It's just us. I'm sorry. 403 00:15:59,370 --> 00:16:02,871 But it's not all bad. I came." 404 00:16:02,974 --> 00:16:04,873 But you don't go to my school. 405 00:16:06,377 --> 00:16:09,478 "But I am a famous comedian." 406 00:16:11,749 --> 00:16:13,515 You're a famous comedian? 407 00:16:13,618 --> 00:16:15,251 But I've never heard of you. 408 00:16:15,319 --> 00:16:16,752 How is that possible? 409 00:16:16,821 --> 00:16:19,054 "That's what I'm saying. It's all possible." 410 00:16:19,156 --> 00:16:21,190 But, like, this specifically. 411 00:16:21,259 --> 00:16:22,491 Say one of your jokes. 412 00:16:23,861 --> 00:16:25,527 "No." 413 00:16:25,596 --> 00:16:28,030 H-His... His jokes are a bit dirty for kids. 414 00:16:28,099 --> 00:16:29,565 Nah, go ahead. He's heard everything. 415 00:16:31,969 --> 00:16:33,135 This makes no sense. 416 00:16:36,173 --> 00:16:38,374 What should I do? Should I turn off the Cajun music? 417 00:16:38,476 --> 00:16:41,377 I mean, I don't... I mean, yes, but I don't know. 418 00:16:41,445 --> 00:16:44,680 Huh? Think you're better than me, Big TV? 419 00:16:44,782 --> 00:16:46,415 I think I really messed up with Dylan. 420 00:16:46,484 --> 00:16:48,250 Is there a one-sentence explanation 421 00:16:48,352 --> 00:16:49,385 for what's happening here? 422 00:16:50,621 --> 00:16:52,254 Big TV thinks it's better than me, 423 00:16:52,356 --> 00:16:54,256 so I'm proving I'm better by doing push-ups, 424 00:16:54,325 --> 00:16:55,924 which Big TV can't do 425 00:16:55,993 --> 00:16:58,127 because it doesn't have arms! 426 00:16:59,230 --> 00:17:01,297 Dad, do you ever seek out the help of others 427 00:17:01,399 --> 00:17:02,665 to work through your issues? 428 00:17:02,767 --> 00:17:04,033 Nah, I'm good. 429 00:17:04,135 --> 00:17:05,701 Dylan, I'm taking you back. 430 00:17:05,803 --> 00:17:07,770 You know, Dr. Phil says 431 00:17:07,838 --> 00:17:10,606 no one can make you feel inferior 432 00:17:10,708 --> 00:17:11,807 without your permission. 433 00:17:11,909 --> 00:17:13,542 Dr. Phil. 434 00:17:15,112 --> 00:17:16,912 Ah. 435 00:17:17,014 --> 00:17:18,480 I remember him from Old TV. 436 00:17:18,582 --> 00:17:19,682 You're right. 437 00:17:19,784 --> 00:17:20,983 I lost the second 438 00:17:21,052 --> 00:17:24,086 I tried to compete with Big TV. 439 00:17:24,188 --> 00:17:26,555 Now it's time to take back control. 440 00:17:26,657 --> 00:17:29,325 Sounds like a good idea. 441 00:17:29,393 --> 00:17:31,393 Uh, maybe just bring it back. 442 00:17:31,495 --> 00:17:32,861 Yeah, that seems more reasonable. 443 00:17:32,963 --> 00:17:35,931 Okay. 444 00:17:37,201 --> 00:17:38,834 You're back? 445 00:17:38,903 --> 00:17:41,103 She is. Please let her stay. 446 00:17:41,172 --> 00:17:44,206 I was the one pushing the lies, and I'm leaving. 447 00:17:44,275 --> 00:17:46,175 I'm not even gonna ask out Tara before I go. 448 00:17:46,243 --> 00:17:48,077 I mean, I wouldn't have said yes. 449 00:17:48,179 --> 00:17:49,078 Doesn't matter. 450 00:17:49,146 --> 00:17:50,579 The point is, I respect the group. 451 00:17:50,681 --> 00:17:52,081 Okay, but I wouldn't have. 452 00:17:52,183 --> 00:17:53,782 Guess we'll never know. 453 00:17:53,884 --> 00:17:56,452 Dylan could really use this. What do you say? 454 00:17:56,520 --> 00:17:58,520 I appreciate your honesty, 455 00:17:58,589 --> 00:17:59,822 but given what's happened, 456 00:17:59,890 --> 00:18:00,789 I think it would be best 457 00:18:00,891 --> 00:18:02,324 if you found support elsewhere. 458 00:18:02,426 --> 00:18:04,693 I hope I can. 459 00:18:04,795 --> 00:18:06,061 It was just nice to see 460 00:18:06,163 --> 00:18:08,297 that someone cared enough to listen. 461 00:18:08,366 --> 00:18:10,599 I guess being a sibling of someone with a disability 462 00:18:10,668 --> 00:18:12,701 makes me feel like my problems don't matter. 463 00:18:12,803 --> 00:18:15,337 Whoa! Breakthrough! 464 00:18:15,406 --> 00:18:17,239 Well, you two take care. 465 00:18:17,308 --> 00:18:18,607 Also, I'm the youngest, 466 00:18:18,709 --> 00:18:20,175 so two people have already gone through 467 00:18:20,277 --> 00:18:21,877 whatever I'm dealing with. 468 00:18:21,979 --> 00:18:23,846 It's not important, but it is. 469 00:18:23,914 --> 00:18:26,115 It's mine. 470 00:18:26,217 --> 00:18:28,283 All right! Two! 471 00:18:28,386 --> 00:18:30,052 Okay, then. 472 00:18:30,121 --> 00:18:31,854 Of course you matter. You're the baby. 473 00:18:31,922 --> 00:18:33,188 Imagine being the middle. 474 00:18:33,290 --> 00:18:34,423 I'm never the priority. 475 00:18:34,525 --> 00:18:36,258 So I cook up romantic schemes 476 00:18:36,327 --> 00:18:38,694 because I don't think I deserve love just being me. 477 00:18:38,796 --> 00:18:41,263 Whoa. I didn't even want one. Cool! 478 00:18:41,365 --> 00:18:43,031 I really need to ask you to leave. 479 00:18:43,134 --> 00:18:46,468 Yeah. I think I'm good. 480 00:18:46,537 --> 00:18:48,070 You, Ray? 481 00:18:48,172 --> 00:18:49,338 Totally. 482 00:18:50,641 --> 00:18:53,041 Yeah, I'm comfortable changing emotional gears abruptly 483 00:18:53,144 --> 00:18:54,743 due to my chaotic upbringing. 484 00:18:54,845 --> 00:18:56,044 Bam! Breakthrough! 485 00:18:56,113 --> 00:18:58,313 Thank you. We're also kind of obsessed with 486 00:18:58,382 --> 00:18:59,915 - having the last word. - Having the last word. 487 00:19:00,017 --> 00:19:01,784 - Breakthrough jinx! - Breakthrough jinx! 488 00:19:03,187 --> 00:19:05,354 Well, we just wanted to say goodbye. 489 00:19:05,456 --> 00:19:06,522 We've done enough. 490 00:19:06,590 --> 00:19:08,657 This party really seems like it's about to pop off. 491 00:19:08,759 --> 00:19:10,192 Sure. 492 00:19:10,294 --> 00:19:12,127 "I'm not a mentor, 493 00:19:12,196 --> 00:19:15,330 and I have nothing wise to say, 494 00:19:15,433 --> 00:19:17,733 but you seem like a good kid. 495 00:19:17,835 --> 00:19:20,335 I think things will get better." 496 00:19:20,438 --> 00:19:22,104 So, now you're not a comedian, 497 00:19:22,206 --> 00:19:23,338 you're a fortune teller. 498 00:19:23,441 --> 00:19:25,541 Listen, bub, he didn't even want to be a mentor... 499 00:19:25,609 --> 00:19:27,509 I'm cool. I'm cool. 500 00:19:27,611 --> 00:19:31,079 Will things get better? 501 00:19:31,182 --> 00:19:32,948 "They did for me. 502 00:19:33,050 --> 00:19:34,783 I made real friends. 503 00:19:34,885 --> 00:19:38,020 I'm graduating, going to college, 504 00:19:38,122 --> 00:19:42,424 and I'm making films, which is my passion." 505 00:19:43,861 --> 00:19:46,662 Why lie? The real stuff is so good. 506 00:19:46,764 --> 00:19:50,532 - We raised him right. - You just got here. 507 00:19:50,634 --> 00:19:52,968 Can I call you sometime? 508 00:19:53,070 --> 00:19:55,437 "I'm not great on the phone, 509 00:19:55,539 --> 00:19:58,273 but yeah, let's get together." 510 00:20:01,812 --> 00:20:04,346 Can I not call you, ever? 511 00:20:04,448 --> 00:20:05,547 Yeah, I'd like that. 512 00:20:12,262 --> 00:20:15,863 I guess this is it, Big TV. 513 00:20:15,965 --> 00:20:16,998 You might be right for someone, 514 00:20:17,100 --> 00:20:19,467 but... you're not right for me. 515 00:20:19,569 --> 00:20:21,417 No. 516 00:20:21,487 --> 00:20:24,417 Old TV does not have 9 HDMI ports. 517 00:20:24,510 --> 00:20:25,561 Dad. 518 00:20:25,632 --> 00:20:28,400 Yeah. Sorry. Sorry. 519 00:20:28,502 --> 00:20:30,441 Thank you. 520 00:20:31,978 --> 00:20:33,014 _ 521 00:20:33,039 --> 00:20:36,341 You know, it was... it was such a nice box. 522 00:20:36,410 --> 00:20:39,911 There will be other boxes. 523 00:20:40,013 --> 00:20:41,479 Come on. 524 00:20:44,284 --> 00:20:46,184 Free TV? Wow! 525 00:20:47,220 --> 00:20:48,520 I'm gonna have to rearrange 526 00:20:48,622 --> 00:20:50,121 my whole living room for this baby. 527 00:20:55,964 --> 00:20:59,764 Synced & corrected by kinglouisxx www.MY-SUBS.com 36928

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