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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,797 --> 00:00:03,770 Kids, there are two big days in any love story: 2 00:00:04,041 --> 00:00:06,213 the day you meet the girl of your dreams, 3 00:00:06,338 --> 00:00:07,965 and the day you marry her. 4 00:00:41,397 --> 00:00:43,656 Nice. Where'd you get this? 5 00:00:43,959 --> 00:00:46,132 Stashed a cooler behind the pulpit. 6 00:00:46,402 --> 00:00:48,726 - Beer be with you. - And also with you. 7 00:00:51,704 --> 00:00:53,812 Man, this is what church has been missing. 8 00:00:53,937 --> 00:00:56,634 - Dude, you fixed church. - You're welcome, God. 9 00:00:58,623 --> 00:00:59,623 Nervous? 10 00:00:59,834 --> 00:01:02,071 No. I'm just hoping it doesn't rain. 11 00:01:02,407 --> 00:01:03,844 Why? Do I look nervous? 12 00:01:04,507 --> 00:01:05,773 Look at your beer. 13 00:01:06,228 --> 00:01:07,775 You do that when you're nervous. 14 00:01:12,142 --> 00:01:14,367 It's a sad day in New York, Ted. 15 00:01:14,700 --> 00:01:15,991 A sad day, indeed. 16 00:01:16,116 --> 00:01:18,510 Do you know what I saw on my way in here? 17 00:01:18,729 --> 00:01:19,767 A girl... 18 00:01:20,470 --> 00:01:21,918 in a sweater. 19 00:01:22,499 --> 00:01:24,070 And you know what that means. 20 00:01:24,195 --> 00:01:27,575 The season of exposed skin is over. 21 00:01:27,700 --> 00:01:28,721 Exactly. 22 00:01:29,381 --> 00:01:30,881 Gone are the tank tops. 23 00:01:31,049 --> 00:01:32,675 Gone are the cute little skirts. 24 00:01:33,075 --> 00:01:34,385 Gone are the sun dresses. 25 00:01:34,653 --> 00:01:35,678 The sun dresses! 26 00:01:36,343 --> 00:01:37,346 I don't think 27 00:01:37,514 --> 00:01:39,682 I can make it another eight months with no sun dresses. 28 00:01:40,321 --> 00:01:43,018 - I have to grade these papers. - I'm sorry. I'll let you work. 29 00:01:43,566 --> 00:01:44,729 But first, a riddle: 30 00:01:45,939 --> 00:01:49,642 What piece of women's attire most stokes a man's desire? 31 00:01:50,193 --> 00:01:51,193 A sun dress. 32 00:01:51,488 --> 00:01:52,570 Correct. 33 00:01:53,499 --> 00:01:56,266 What lightweight outfit, pink or white, 34 00:01:56,485 --> 00:01:59,285 makes the front of my slacks abnormally tight? 35 00:01:59,995 --> 00:02:02,371 - I really have to get this done. - Of course. 36 00:02:03,746 --> 00:02:05,040 "Sun dress," by the way. 37 00:02:08,871 --> 00:02:11,380 What are you nervous about? Tell me... 38 00:02:12,382 --> 00:02:14,884 - What flowing cotton frock... - I'll tell you. Just... 39 00:02:18,221 --> 00:02:20,014 There's a girl sitting at the bar. 40 00:02:21,350 --> 00:02:24,101 - Don't look! - I want to see a pretty girl. 41 00:02:24,269 --> 00:02:27,271 Okay, you can look. Just be cool for once. 42 00:02:28,618 --> 00:02:29,710 I'll be cool. 43 00:02:37,307 --> 00:02:39,700 You got your beer label in a bunch over nothing. 44 00:02:40,140 --> 00:02:41,686 Listen to your Uncle Barney. 45 00:02:42,010 --> 00:02:44,605 You have no reason to be nervous. 46 00:02:44,824 --> 00:02:46,164 None whatsoever. 47 00:02:46,289 --> 00:02:49,461 And I'm going to tell you why in one word. 48 00:02:49,836 --> 00:02:51,670 - And what's that word? - Dibs! 49 00:02:52,631 --> 00:02:54,631 Who's this fucking mother Team 50 00:02:54,756 --> 00:02:57,259 Synchronisation : JoJo, Karim, Kyros, MiniBen314 51 00:02:58,053 --> 00:03:00,387 Adaptation : Dark_Chii, H3AV3N, Kenji, TTT 52 00:03:00,555 --> 00:03:02,556 Relecture : MiniBen314, Titou 53 00:03:02,808 --> 00:03:05,267 6x01 - Big Days (1.00) .:: www.sous-titres.eu ::. 54 00:03:05,435 --> 00:03:07,577 You can't call dibs on a girl I've been sitting here 55 00:03:07,702 --> 00:03:10,105 thinking about maybe talking to eventually at some point. 56 00:03:10,442 --> 00:03:11,982 You never called dibs. 57 00:03:12,150 --> 00:03:13,442 Dibs were implied. 58 00:03:13,610 --> 00:03:15,069 Implied dibs? 59 00:03:16,112 --> 00:03:19,398 You are spitting on the grave of Sir Walter Dibs, 60 00:03:19,523 --> 00:03:22,411 inventor of the dib. It was 1652... 61 00:03:23,036 --> 00:03:24,453 The SS Dibs was lost... 62 00:03:24,621 --> 00:03:26,587 I don't have time for a fake history lesson, 63 00:03:26,712 --> 00:03:28,079 so I'll keep this simple. 64 00:03:28,204 --> 00:03:31,126 You go over there and talk to that girl, I will see you in court. 65 00:03:31,294 --> 00:03:33,504 And who's gonna represent you? Dibs on Marshall! 66 00:03:33,672 --> 00:03:35,840 - Damn it. - Where is Marshall anyway? 67 00:03:36,008 --> 00:03:38,151 Uncle Marshall and Aunt Lily had recently decided 68 00:03:38,276 --> 00:03:40,135 to take a swing at starting a family. 69 00:03:40,570 --> 00:03:42,232 Tonight was their first at-bat. 70 00:03:42,357 --> 00:03:43,973 I'm almost ready to leave. 71 00:03:44,141 --> 00:03:45,724 Let's see the checklist. Candles? 72 00:03:45,892 --> 00:03:47,935 - Check. - Music to set the mood? 73 00:03:49,720 --> 00:03:50,720 Check. 74 00:03:51,106 --> 00:03:53,028 Music for when we're actually doing it? 75 00:03:57,821 --> 00:03:58,737 You know what? 76 00:03:59,035 --> 00:04:01,824 To hell with your dibs. I'm going over there and talking to her. 77 00:04:02,559 --> 00:04:05,327 Be my guest. Fall in love with her. Get married. 78 00:04:05,495 --> 00:04:06,579 Just know this: 79 00:04:06,747 --> 00:04:09,707 When I step up to make my toast as your best man... 80 00:04:09,875 --> 00:04:12,626 - Marshall would probably be... - As your best man... 81 00:04:13,045 --> 00:04:14,613 Ladies and Gentlemen... 82 00:04:15,283 --> 00:04:16,088 I... 83 00:04:16,451 --> 00:04:17,802 had dibs. 84 00:04:20,677 --> 00:04:22,011 Tell me this isn't true. 85 00:04:22,179 --> 00:04:23,977 I had implied dibs. 86 00:04:26,808 --> 00:04:28,204 You've humiliated me! 87 00:04:29,186 --> 00:04:31,020 I had no idea. You have to know that. 88 00:04:32,811 --> 00:04:34,523 You're the victim here. We both are. 89 00:04:35,692 --> 00:04:36,817 Let's get out. 90 00:04:37,560 --> 00:04:39,361 Or, we could just do it right here. 91 00:04:43,784 --> 00:04:45,499 Fine. Have at it. 92 00:04:46,029 --> 00:04:47,499 Exercise your dibs. 93 00:04:47,748 --> 00:04:50,122 She's got her shields up. She's reading a book. 94 00:04:51,333 --> 00:04:53,777 At a bar. That book might as well be called: 95 00:04:53,902 --> 00:04:55,920 Are You There, Barney? It's Me, Horny. 96 00:04:56,306 --> 00:04:58,644 That is not what "shields up" looks like. 97 00:04:59,465 --> 00:05:01,383 That is what "shields up" looks like. 98 00:05:02,484 --> 00:05:03,484 Move. 99 00:05:08,668 --> 00:05:09,836 'Sup, dudes? 100 00:05:10,560 --> 00:05:11,560 Fries? 101 00:05:12,562 --> 00:05:14,563 Good God, woman. You're a disgrace. 102 00:05:14,731 --> 00:05:16,232 No fries for this guy. 103 00:05:17,526 --> 00:05:19,717 Seriously, I love you, but it's like 104 00:05:19,955 --> 00:05:23,026 you have squiggly cartoon odor lines coming off of you right now. 105 00:05:24,952 --> 00:05:27,828 Just cut her some slack, okay? She just went through a breakup. 106 00:05:28,217 --> 00:05:29,655 With hygiene? 107 00:05:30,247 --> 00:05:31,691 No, with Don. 108 00:05:31,816 --> 00:05:33,290 A few months earlier... 109 00:05:34,333 --> 00:05:36,202 - Here, have some tea. - Thanks. 110 00:05:36,327 --> 00:05:39,004 Robin, I am here for you. Whatever you need. 111 00:05:39,889 --> 00:05:41,381 Okay, about that. 112 00:05:41,506 --> 00:05:42,842 Ted, listen. 113 00:05:44,202 --> 00:05:45,677 I know myself pretty well. 114 00:05:46,724 --> 00:05:50,432 Some time over the next few months, I'm going to want to sleep with you. 115 00:05:50,811 --> 00:05:53,477 And when that happens, you have to try to say no. 116 00:05:53,785 --> 00:05:54,785 Try? 117 00:05:54,910 --> 00:05:57,648 I will absolutely say no. Our friendship is too important. 118 00:05:59,810 --> 00:06:01,458 Maybe I wasn't clear enough. 119 00:06:03,118 --> 00:06:05,739 I will come at you with everything I've got. 120 00:06:06,239 --> 00:06:09,548 I will stalk you like the lioness stalks the gazelle, 121 00:06:09,673 --> 00:06:11,023 careful, patient, 122 00:06:11,781 --> 00:06:12,788 deadly. 123 00:06:13,464 --> 00:06:16,356 And if you let your guard down for so much as a second, 124 00:06:16,481 --> 00:06:17,972 as sure as you were born, 125 00:06:18,097 --> 00:06:20,913 I will hump your brains out. 126 00:06:26,716 --> 00:06:28,817 I'm ready to have sex now. 127 00:06:32,178 --> 00:06:35,178 It was a tough summer, but I think our girl's been a real trooper. 128 00:06:35,303 --> 00:06:36,303 She's... 129 00:06:38,565 --> 00:06:39,705 Is this a Cheeto? 130 00:06:39,830 --> 00:06:41,608 No, we ran out of Cheetos last week. 131 00:06:41,776 --> 00:06:43,459 Yeah, it's a Cheeto. Dibs. 132 00:06:45,499 --> 00:06:46,748 You're exquisite. 133 00:06:46,873 --> 00:06:48,379 You must let me paint you. 134 00:06:49,519 --> 00:06:52,411 What do you think? The girl sitting at the bar, shields up? 135 00:06:53,248 --> 00:06:55,164 Totes, toots. She's here on a date. 136 00:06:55,289 --> 00:06:57,608 She brought the book because she got here early, 137 00:06:57,733 --> 00:07:00,236 and she also wants to impress the guy she's meeting. 138 00:07:00,361 --> 00:07:03,484 Girls like to come across all classy and smart, you know? 139 00:07:05,240 --> 00:07:07,099 This? What you're doing right now? 140 00:07:07,719 --> 00:07:09,470 I'm getting a "de-rection." 141 00:07:11,753 --> 00:07:13,440 How'd it go? You pregnant yet? 142 00:07:13,565 --> 00:07:14,565 Nope! 143 00:07:14,690 --> 00:07:16,143 So, here's what happened. 144 00:07:16,311 --> 00:07:18,103 I was at home, waiting for Marshall. 145 00:07:18,964 --> 00:07:20,230 How was your day? 146 00:07:20,398 --> 00:07:21,951 Don't answer. No time. 147 00:07:22,076 --> 00:07:23,358 Bedroom. No time. 148 00:07:23,649 --> 00:07:24,737 Floor. No time. 149 00:07:24,862 --> 00:07:26,987 - Against this wall! - Marshall. Wait. 150 00:07:27,291 --> 00:07:29,198 A big package just arrived. 151 00:07:29,637 --> 00:07:31,325 - Yeah, it did. - No. 152 00:07:31,493 --> 00:07:33,452 It's a real package from your dad. 153 00:07:33,620 --> 00:07:35,794 That's a little weird, but yeah, it is. 154 00:07:36,565 --> 00:07:37,565 Look! 155 00:07:40,032 --> 00:07:41,871 A bassinet? Oh, my... 156 00:07:41,996 --> 00:07:44,546 He must've made it in his wood shop. 157 00:07:44,714 --> 00:07:46,464 Wasn't that sweet of him? 158 00:07:49,108 --> 00:07:50,333 Isn't that sweet? 159 00:07:53,515 --> 00:07:56,391 You told your dad we're trying to have a baby? 160 00:07:56,559 --> 00:07:58,496 Of course I did. I tell my dad everything. 161 00:07:58,621 --> 00:08:00,062 My dad is my best friend. 162 00:08:03,018 --> 00:08:05,021 We have been looking forward 163 00:08:05,146 --> 00:08:08,250 to this magical, special night for two weeks now. 164 00:08:08,375 --> 00:08:11,137 And, sweetie, during that time, I have been... 165 00:08:12,449 --> 00:08:14,118 How do I put this delicately? 166 00:08:15,305 --> 00:08:17,541 Saving all my love for you. 167 00:08:20,021 --> 00:08:23,377 I have read 11 books on conception. 168 00:08:23,545 --> 00:08:24,711 I have cut out 169 00:08:24,879 --> 00:08:26,706 alcohol, caffeine and sugar. 170 00:08:26,831 --> 00:08:28,847 I take my temperature every hour. 171 00:08:28,972 --> 00:08:31,636 But good for you for not playing with yourself. 172 00:08:34,264 --> 00:08:36,634 - I feel you, buddy. - Don't even touch me, dude. 173 00:08:36,759 --> 00:08:38,433 It's been two weeks. 174 00:08:38,601 --> 00:08:41,784 I'm, like, a light breeze away from having a big problem. 175 00:08:41,909 --> 00:08:42,909 Seriously. 176 00:08:45,358 --> 00:08:46,724 Okay, I'm better now. 177 00:08:50,280 --> 00:08:52,263 - What's this going to cost me? - Excuse me? 178 00:08:52,388 --> 00:08:53,782 I want to buy your dibs. 179 00:08:54,587 --> 00:08:56,261 Two... hundred... 180 00:08:56,386 --> 00:08:57,973 and fifty thousand dollars. 181 00:08:58,288 --> 00:08:59,288 20 bucks. 182 00:09:00,685 --> 00:09:01,685 But I... 183 00:09:02,381 --> 00:09:04,212 - Can I go smell her first? - No. 184 00:09:05,170 --> 00:09:06,170 All right. 185 00:09:07,342 --> 00:09:08,297 Wish me luck. 186 00:09:10,665 --> 00:09:13,677 Now kids, remember how I told you about a girl named Cindy? 187 00:09:14,254 --> 00:09:16,054 How I went on one date and it ended... 188 00:09:16,222 --> 00:09:17,491 - Get out. - badly? 189 00:09:18,558 --> 00:09:19,808 - How are you? - Good. 190 00:09:24,600 --> 00:09:27,357 - What the hell are you doing? - That girl she's talking to? 191 00:09:27,765 --> 00:09:28,865 I dated her. 192 00:09:30,455 --> 00:09:32,006 That sucks! 193 00:09:32,338 --> 00:09:33,338 And dibs. 194 00:09:37,156 --> 00:09:40,004 So you went on one date with one of her friends. 195 00:09:40,129 --> 00:09:42,056 It's not necessarily a big deal. 196 00:09:42,181 --> 00:09:43,624 Did it end on bad terms? 197 00:09:47,117 --> 00:09:48,086 Hi Cindy! 198 00:09:53,816 --> 00:09:55,790 Well, I guess you just got to move on. 199 00:09:55,915 --> 00:09:59,056 It's not like you have a shot with Ready McGee over there, right? 200 00:10:01,956 --> 00:10:03,150 Then I remembered. 201 00:10:03,483 --> 00:10:05,020 Cindy had a roommate. 202 00:10:05,885 --> 00:10:08,143 A roommate I only caught a glimpse of... 203 00:10:09,936 --> 00:10:12,218 But a roommate who, by every indication, 204 00:10:12,343 --> 00:10:14,071 was something very special. 205 00:10:15,417 --> 00:10:16,544 Was it possible? 206 00:10:17,224 --> 00:10:19,929 Could this be the girl attached to that ankle? 207 00:10:23,474 --> 00:10:25,207 I got to see her ankles. 208 00:10:25,375 --> 00:10:26,875 You're one of those? 209 00:10:27,081 --> 00:10:29,544 God, I swear, one in five guys... 210 00:10:31,464 --> 00:10:33,298 We kind of had a plan tonight, remember? 211 00:10:33,601 --> 00:10:34,780 Candles? Banjo? 212 00:10:34,905 --> 00:10:37,427 Who else did you tell? Did you tell anyone at the office? 213 00:10:45,156 --> 00:10:46,305 Start the music. 214 00:10:50,837 --> 00:10:53,664 Can you dig it? 215 00:10:55,947 --> 00:10:57,590 Take it to the hole, Eriksen! 216 00:10:57,715 --> 00:10:59,825 Sink that putt, big fuzz! 217 00:10:59,993 --> 00:11:03,266 Put a pillow under her lower back. It helps facilitate conception, bro! 218 00:11:10,684 --> 00:11:14,893 I may have mentioned it in passing to a couple of colleagues at work. 219 00:11:15,018 --> 00:11:16,999 I'm sorry about that, but you know what? 220 00:11:17,124 --> 00:11:18,927 I gottaa be able to tell my dad. 221 00:11:19,095 --> 00:11:21,543 Your dad is the last person you should tell! 222 00:11:21,668 --> 00:11:24,068 The man is too involved in our lives! 223 00:11:24,193 --> 00:11:26,445 It's like, every time the phone rings... 224 00:11:28,646 --> 00:11:30,188 Lily, Marvin Eriksen. 225 00:11:30,356 --> 00:11:32,316 I noticed you hadn't changed your last name yet. 226 00:11:32,484 --> 00:11:35,348 - No, I'm gonna... - So, don't worry. I called the DMV, 227 00:11:35,473 --> 00:11:38,322 I called your Amex, I got that process started for you. 228 00:11:41,451 --> 00:11:42,909 Lily, Marvin Eriksen. 229 00:11:43,077 --> 00:11:45,280 I understand you and Marshall have been fighting. 230 00:11:45,405 --> 00:11:47,744 Well, let me tell you what works for me and the missus. 231 00:11:47,869 --> 00:11:50,368 Frilly French undies and a box of wine. 232 00:11:53,379 --> 00:11:55,255 You might wanna try pickles on that sandwich. 233 00:11:57,463 --> 00:11:59,551 Pickles would have helped that sandwich! 234 00:11:59,719 --> 00:12:01,793 The man has no boundaries. 235 00:12:01,918 --> 00:12:04,973 And I just can't procreate under these conditions! 236 00:12:05,141 --> 00:12:08,685 Well, you know what? I've already told him, so the damage is done. 237 00:12:08,853 --> 00:12:11,646 So, call him and tell him we decided not to have a baby. 238 00:12:12,645 --> 00:12:15,484 Okay, so you just... You want me to give my dad a stroke? 239 00:12:16,306 --> 00:12:18,366 Only if you wanna give this a stroke. 240 00:12:19,113 --> 00:12:22,157 That's ridiculous. Lily, there is no way that I would ever... 241 00:12:25,213 --> 00:12:27,893 Okay, everyone needs to shut up so that I can think! 242 00:12:30,168 --> 00:12:32,178 - They're talking to a guy now. - What kinda guy? 243 00:12:32,303 --> 00:12:34,669 - A cheesy guy or a cool guy? - A cheesy guy. Don't worry. 244 00:12:36,714 --> 00:12:38,361 That guy is cool. 245 00:12:38,486 --> 00:12:40,384 His hair's all cool, he's got a cool belt. 246 00:12:41,140 --> 00:12:44,490 That guy is cheesy, and if you think he's not cheesy, 247 00:12:44,615 --> 00:12:47,844 then you're cheesy, too, and now I want something cheesy. 248 00:12:47,969 --> 00:12:49,518 Who's feeling nachos? 249 00:12:50,226 --> 00:12:51,937 Look at you, Robin. You're jealous. 250 00:12:52,665 --> 00:12:54,269 - Jealous? - Yeah, jealous, 251 00:12:54,394 --> 00:12:56,555 because she's got it, and you've lost it. 252 00:12:58,028 --> 00:12:59,319 I have not lost it. 253 00:12:59,487 --> 00:13:00,404 You lost it. 254 00:13:00,572 --> 00:13:01,872 I still have it. 255 00:13:02,584 --> 00:13:04,125 I know exactly where it is, 256 00:13:04,250 --> 00:13:05,518 and I can go get it 257 00:13:05,643 --> 00:13:06,816 whenever I want. 258 00:13:07,245 --> 00:13:10,032 Robin, girls are like cartons of milk. 259 00:13:10,157 --> 00:13:12,213 Each one has a hotness expiration date, 260 00:13:12,338 --> 00:13:13,888 and you've hit yours. 261 00:13:14,130 --> 00:13:16,760 I'm not saying the occasional guy won't still open the fridge, 262 00:13:16,885 --> 00:13:19,221 pick you up, give a sniff, shrug and take a sip anyway. 263 00:13:19,346 --> 00:13:20,996 But it's all downhill from here. 264 00:13:21,785 --> 00:13:23,135 I don't have to take this. 265 00:13:25,096 --> 00:13:26,489 But I do have to take this. 266 00:13:29,100 --> 00:13:31,139 So you just want me to call my dad 267 00:13:31,264 --> 00:13:34,312 - and tell him we're not having a baby? - That's about the size of it. 268 00:13:35,811 --> 00:13:37,038 Out of curiosity, 269 00:13:37,163 --> 00:13:38,900 when do we tell him about the baby? 270 00:13:39,068 --> 00:13:41,945 We'll tell him about the baby when there's a baby to tell him about. 271 00:13:42,113 --> 00:13:43,963 So, he just gets no notice? 272 00:13:44,235 --> 00:13:46,964 He just walks into his boss's office, and says, 273 00:13:47,089 --> 00:13:49,536 "I just had a grandson. I'm gonna be out for three months." 274 00:13:49,918 --> 00:13:51,204 Out for three months? 275 00:13:52,749 --> 00:13:55,823 He and my mom are coming to live with us when the baby's born. 276 00:13:56,461 --> 00:13:58,920 - We talked about this. - No, we didn't. 277 00:13:59,592 --> 00:14:01,089 I meant, me and my dad. 278 00:14:01,688 --> 00:14:04,468 You know what, Marshall? Why don't you have a baby with your dad? 279 00:14:06,472 --> 00:14:08,722 Why don't you have a baby with your butt? 280 00:14:09,125 --> 00:14:10,125 What? 281 00:14:10,735 --> 00:14:12,017 I can't think straight! 282 00:14:12,694 --> 00:14:14,432 Why do you have to wear that shirt? 283 00:14:15,655 --> 00:14:17,922 This is not how I thought this night was gonna go! 284 00:14:30,515 --> 00:14:33,205 God, this sucks! Do you think she saw me? 285 00:14:33,373 --> 00:14:34,331 Hi, Ted! 286 00:14:34,499 --> 00:14:36,416 Yeah, she definitely saw you. 287 00:14:36,737 --> 00:14:38,919 Can I see you for a minute... in private? 288 00:14:39,984 --> 00:14:41,434 Yeah, sure. I mean, 289 00:14:42,187 --> 00:14:44,049 how could that not be fun? 290 00:14:46,921 --> 00:14:49,304 If I don't come back, tell my mom I love her. 291 00:14:49,472 --> 00:14:50,872 Will do. And dibs. 292 00:14:54,151 --> 00:14:55,612 Barney, am I crazy? 293 00:14:55,737 --> 00:14:58,063 Marshall talks to his dad way too much, right? 294 00:14:58,621 --> 00:15:00,357 You don't want my opinion on that. 295 00:15:00,525 --> 00:15:01,358 Why not? 296 00:15:01,860 --> 00:15:03,881 If I had my dad's number, 297 00:15:04,006 --> 00:15:06,079 I would never not be on the phone with him. 298 00:15:07,180 --> 00:15:08,281 That was really... 299 00:15:08,718 --> 00:15:10,310 A hottie with a body! 300 00:15:12,453 --> 00:15:14,303 - Brief. - No. Lily, look. 301 00:15:18,140 --> 00:15:19,740 You saucy little minx. 302 00:15:20,729 --> 00:15:22,129 You sundressed up. 303 00:15:27,335 --> 00:15:28,468 14 seconds! 304 00:15:28,774 --> 00:15:30,554 14 seconds, and already 305 00:15:30,722 --> 00:15:32,253 some dingdong is stepping up, 306 00:15:32,378 --> 00:15:34,394 thinking he can get some of this broke off. 307 00:15:35,496 --> 00:15:38,099 I... still... got... it. 308 00:15:40,690 --> 00:15:43,120 All right, buddy, you proved my point. Now scram. 309 00:15:44,178 --> 00:15:45,778 Nice belt, by the way. 310 00:15:50,491 --> 00:15:52,441 Robin, you do look super hot. 311 00:15:52,667 --> 00:15:54,388 - Do I? - Yeah, you do. 312 00:15:55,289 --> 00:15:56,162 Thanks. 313 00:15:59,584 --> 00:16:01,543 I braced myself for what was next: 314 00:16:01,851 --> 00:16:04,129 rage, fury, a savage bitting. 315 00:16:06,758 --> 00:16:07,758 Thank you. 316 00:16:08,062 --> 00:16:09,801 After things didn't work out with us, 317 00:16:09,926 --> 00:16:11,428 I got really sad for a while. 318 00:16:12,083 --> 00:16:13,346 Then I realized, 319 00:16:13,514 --> 00:16:15,795 you're not what I wanted, and I'm not what you wanted. 320 00:16:16,206 --> 00:16:17,732 I'm sorry I was such a jerk. 321 00:16:17,857 --> 00:16:19,949 I feel like I should make it up to you somehow. 322 00:16:20,074 --> 00:16:22,355 Buy you a beer or Yankees tickets, or... 323 00:16:22,523 --> 00:16:24,283 Or set me up with one of your friends. 324 00:16:24,408 --> 00:16:26,318 No, I'm kidding. That would be weird. 325 00:16:26,609 --> 00:16:28,194 No, it wouldn't. would it? 326 00:16:28,765 --> 00:16:31,823 Any one of those three. Whichever's easiest and right nearby. 327 00:16:32,867 --> 00:16:33,908 And not the beer. 328 00:16:34,076 --> 00:16:36,036 - I should get back. - Totally. 329 00:16:36,204 --> 00:16:38,205 Come say good-bye before you leave. 330 00:16:39,415 --> 00:16:42,208 - Say good-bye before you leave? - Her words exactly. 331 00:16:42,376 --> 00:16:44,232 Dude, you are so in. 332 00:16:44,357 --> 00:16:45,893 That is so awesome. 333 00:16:46,018 --> 00:16:48,127 A high five doesn't cut. High six! 334 00:16:50,555 --> 00:16:51,843 She didn't see this. 335 00:16:52,138 --> 00:16:54,322 - Good. That was lame. - Let's never do that again. 336 00:16:58,162 --> 00:16:59,370 What? Lily what? 337 00:16:59,495 --> 00:17:02,270 Are there more members of my family that you want to crap all over? 338 00:17:02,438 --> 00:17:04,564 - Here's the thing. - Sorry. Hold on. 339 00:17:05,004 --> 00:17:06,004 Just... 340 00:17:06,610 --> 00:17:07,525 It's my dad. 341 00:17:08,885 --> 00:17:11,044 Lily, it's my dad, okay? 342 00:17:11,169 --> 00:17:14,491 I love him, and if he calls me, I'm gonna answer the phone! 343 00:17:18,394 --> 00:17:20,664 I know it's late, but I just had to call. 344 00:17:20,832 --> 00:17:22,332 - How'd it go? - This is... 345 00:17:22,500 --> 00:17:25,251 Did you do everything the books say? Put the pillow under her back? 346 00:17:25,419 --> 00:17:28,190 - I'm in the middle of something. - Did it feel like a boy? 347 00:17:28,315 --> 00:17:29,547 Huh? You can tell. 348 00:17:30,089 --> 00:17:31,091 He's insane. 349 00:17:32,301 --> 00:17:33,635 My dad is insane. 350 00:17:36,143 --> 00:17:37,263 I'm so sorry. 351 00:17:38,900 --> 00:17:40,000 He's just... 352 00:17:41,778 --> 00:17:42,838 He's so... 353 00:17:44,836 --> 00:17:45,986 enthusiastic. 354 00:17:46,912 --> 00:17:48,712 It's ridiculous, you know? 355 00:17:48,890 --> 00:17:50,190 Who's like that? 356 00:17:52,280 --> 00:17:53,280 You. 357 00:17:54,039 --> 00:17:55,389 You're like that. 358 00:17:56,574 --> 00:17:59,842 You and your dad both care so much. 359 00:18:01,676 --> 00:18:04,958 It's why women fall in love with the Eriksen men to begin with. 360 00:18:06,409 --> 00:18:08,878 But right now, it's a lot of pressure. 361 00:18:10,225 --> 00:18:13,758 - I'm not trying to pressure you... - What if I can't have a baby? 362 00:18:15,686 --> 00:18:17,086 That could happen. 363 00:18:17,492 --> 00:18:19,874 I could totally let you down. 364 00:18:21,565 --> 00:18:23,601 Has that thought not occurred to you? 365 00:18:25,054 --> 00:18:26,754 Not even for one second. 366 00:18:32,143 --> 00:18:34,093 Not having a baby would suck, 367 00:18:36,018 --> 00:18:38,092 but the idea of you letting me down, 368 00:18:39,345 --> 00:18:40,745 that's impossible. 369 00:18:43,279 --> 00:18:45,248 That would be like aliens landing. 370 00:18:47,255 --> 00:18:49,907 That's a bad example, because that could happen. 371 00:18:50,032 --> 00:18:52,604 It probably already has. I saw this episode... 372 00:18:57,843 --> 00:18:58,843 All right. 373 00:18:59,442 --> 00:19:00,513 I'm doing this. 374 00:19:00,774 --> 00:19:02,374 I am going over there. 375 00:19:10,944 --> 00:19:12,094 Wish me luck. 376 00:19:17,073 --> 00:19:19,365 Nothing in this life quite compares to the sweet, 377 00:19:19,533 --> 00:19:22,002 terrifying exhilaration of making your move. 378 00:19:22,830 --> 00:19:25,174 When you just put it all on the line and go for it. 379 00:19:26,304 --> 00:19:28,268 And that night, by golly, 380 00:19:29,085 --> 00:19:30,485 Cindy went for it. 381 00:19:47,606 --> 00:19:49,962 So no, kids, that girl wasn't your mother. 382 00:19:50,274 --> 00:19:52,273 She ended up being someone else's mother. 383 00:19:52,676 --> 00:19:54,514 In fact, they both did. 384 00:20:04,788 --> 00:20:06,692 Like I said, she's here on a date. 385 00:20:07,331 --> 00:20:09,415 So that was not the day I met your mother. 386 00:20:09,765 --> 00:20:13,086 The day I met your mother was the day of a wedding. 387 00:20:14,124 --> 00:20:15,638 Maybe I'm a little nervous. 388 00:20:15,876 --> 00:20:18,881 - Dude, it's just a wedding toast. - I know. I want it to be great. 389 00:20:19,006 --> 00:20:21,486 - I want this whole day to be great. - It will be. 390 00:20:22,081 --> 00:20:24,597 Best man? You're being summoned. 391 00:20:25,046 --> 00:20:26,307 Geez, what now? 392 00:20:27,038 --> 00:20:29,602 Ted, seriously, relax. Everything's... 393 00:20:29,770 --> 00:20:32,367 - Okay, and it's raining. - Yeah. You were saying? 394 00:20:32,492 --> 00:20:34,680 You didn't happen to bring an umbrella, did you? 395 00:20:35,374 --> 00:20:37,224 I didn't bring an umbrella. 396 00:20:42,975 --> 00:20:45,428 Everyone told us that it might take a while, but... 397 00:20:45,946 --> 00:20:48,203 we thought we might be the exception to the rule. 398 00:20:49,524 --> 00:20:51,769 Anyways, we're getting back on that horse. I mean, 399 00:20:52,884 --> 00:20:54,627 feeling good about the future. 400 00:20:57,155 --> 00:21:00,592 Obviously, this goes without saying but, you won't tell Lily about any of this? 29414

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