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www.tvsubtitles.net
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♪ I don't want a lot for Christmas
There is just one thing I need... ♪
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00:00:06,884 --> 00:00:10,363
TANNOY: Stacey Shipman,
telephone call.
4
00:00:10,366 --> 00:00:13,006
Telephone call for Stacey Shipman.
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00:00:14,409 --> 00:00:16,168
Hello? Gav? Hiya!
6
00:00:16,170 --> 00:00:18,849
Oh, my God, what did they say?
Were they nice? D'you think you got it?
7
00:00:18,851 --> 00:00:21,370
Which of those do you want me
to answer first?
8
00:00:21,373 --> 00:00:24,212
The last one.
D'you think you got it? Yeah, I do.
9
00:00:24,215 --> 00:00:28,014
Why? Well, 'cos at the end of the
interview, they offered me the job!
10
00:00:28,017 --> 00:00:29,696
Ahhhhhhhh!
11
00:00:29,698 --> 00:00:31,577
They want me to start January 5th.
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00:00:31,579 --> 00:00:36,098
Oh, my God! Right. Well, you're
gonna have to go and talk to Ness. Get it over with.
13
00:00:36,102 --> 00:00:39,182
I'm going straight there. She's on
the island? You can't miss her.
14
00:00:56,084 --> 00:00:58,723
All right, calm it down, all right?
15
00:00:58,726 --> 00:01:00,285
Gav!
16
00:01:00,287 --> 00:01:07,006
All right, Dave? Oh, I'm not being
funny but don't call me Dave in front of the punters, all right?
17
00:01:07,011 --> 00:01:09,650
It's Rudolph. Sorry. None taken.
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00:01:09,653 --> 00:01:13,172
So what's going on?
I thought we were coming to you.
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00:01:13,175 --> 00:01:16,174
Yeah. You are, it's just...
Bear with me, Gav. Oh. Emlyn.
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00:01:16,177 --> 00:01:17,697
In you go.
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00:01:19,939 --> 00:01:24,018
Sorry, you were saying? I'm in a bit
of a rush. I need a word with Nessa.
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00:01:24,021 --> 00:01:26,660
She's working - it's a busy
time of year, you know.
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00:01:26,663 --> 00:01:28,822
I literally need two minutes
with her.
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00:01:28,824 --> 00:01:31,623
OK but you're gonna have to queue.
And it's two quid.
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00:01:31,626 --> 00:01:35,105
Dave, I just... But you will get
a gift. I don't really want a gift.
26
00:01:35,108 --> 00:01:37,027
I don't think anyone does, Gav.
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They're not much cop if
truth be told and we've had a lot of complaints. I tell you what,
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I'll let you in for a pound
if you're leaving the gift.
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Right. Cheers.
30
00:01:56,161 --> 00:01:59,680
Oh, my Christ.
Hiya! Get out! Get out!
31
00:01:59,683 --> 00:02:03,002
What?
Turn around, do not come in, Mick.
32
00:02:03,005 --> 00:02:05,244
Look, I just want to get
to the kitchen!
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00:02:05,247 --> 00:02:08,806
Well, do not look anywhere
in my direction.
34
00:02:08,809 --> 00:02:10,728
Michael, I mean it!
35
00:02:10,730 --> 00:02:14,529
I won't look at what you're wrapping.
How do you know I'm wrapping?!
36
00:02:14,532 --> 00:02:17,451
Turn around. You'll ruin it.
I don't want to ruin it.
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00:02:17,454 --> 00:02:20,133
I want the surprise.
I'm looking forward to it.
38
00:02:20,136 --> 00:02:22,535
Well, stop trying to ruin it then!
39
00:02:22,537 --> 00:02:24,137
Right, you can look now.
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00:02:26,380 --> 00:02:29,619
I thought we were only having
little presents this year anyway?
41
00:02:29,622 --> 00:02:31,301
I know and I've done you a stocking.
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00:02:31,303 --> 00:02:34,702
But when I saw this I just had to
get it 'cos I fell in love with it.
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00:02:34,705 --> 00:02:36,464
Just like you fell in love with me.
44
00:02:36,466 --> 00:02:41,105
Oh no, I fell in love with it
much more than you.
45
00:02:41,109 --> 00:02:43,468
Come here!
46
00:02:43,470 --> 00:02:45,469
Now, have a look at this little lady.
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00:02:45,471 --> 00:02:49,910
Bootiful, that is. Bootiful.
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00:02:49,914 --> 00:02:52,553
This is a Norfolk Kerry Bronze, Pam.
49
00:02:52,556 --> 00:02:55,315
Hand-reared, free range.
It's better than organic.
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00:02:55,318 --> 00:02:57,957
Every year, this love affair
with the bloody bird.
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00:02:57,959 --> 00:03:00,878
What I'm saying is, it died
happy and it's gonna taste
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00:03:00,881 --> 00:03:03,400
all the better for it.
Shame you can't have any.
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00:03:03,403 --> 00:03:06,522
Well, no, because I've thought
this through. What do you mean?
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00:03:06,524 --> 00:03:08,283
I'm having the turkey.
55
00:03:08,286 --> 00:03:10,445
But they all think
you're a vegetarian.
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00:03:10,447 --> 00:03:17,486
I know but I've decided there's no
way I'm doing Christmas without my Michael's turkey. No way, blase.
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00:03:17,491 --> 00:03:20,610
So, I'm just gonna plate myself up,
sit down and tuck in.
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00:03:20,613 --> 00:03:23,532
And I'm having stuffing,
pigs in blankets, the lot.
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00:03:23,535 --> 00:03:29,094
And when the inevitable questions
come, which they will, Michael, I shall simply say, I'm sorry,
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00:03:29,098 --> 00:03:32,097
it's Christmas,
please let me eat my dinner in peace
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00:03:32,100 --> 00:03:36,260
the way Jesus would have
wanted me to, on his birthday.
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00:03:37,984 --> 00:03:41,024
Oi, Gav, get in the grotto. Oh.
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00:03:43,507 --> 00:03:46,186
Cheers, Dave... Rudolph. Rudolph.
64
00:03:46,189 --> 00:03:50,028
Bear with me Gav, I'm working.
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00:03:50,031 --> 00:03:53,990
O. O. O. Merry Christmas.
66
00:03:53,994 --> 00:03:55,993
Did you send me a letter? Yes.
67
00:03:55,995 --> 00:03:59,714
That's right, I remember.
What was it you asked me for again?
68
00:03:59,717 --> 00:04:04,636
An Xbox. That's right, I remember.
Now you're Sue's boy, is that right?
69
00:04:04,640 --> 00:04:07,399
And Tony's your step? Yes.
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00:04:07,402 --> 00:04:09,561
Nasty business, all that.
71
00:04:09,563 --> 00:04:12,682
Your dad's due for parole?
Will he be out for Christmas? No.
72
00:04:12,685 --> 00:04:14,164
No. Probably for the best.
73
00:04:14,166 --> 00:04:17,445
Given the amount of people
that eventually came forward.
74
00:04:17,448 --> 00:04:22,247
Now, I don't want to disappoint
you but I reckon the Xbox is a bit pie in the sky, like.
75
00:04:22,251 --> 00:04:25,090
You'd be better off lowering
your expectations.
76
00:04:25,093 --> 00:04:28,852
I'm thinking Sega Mega Drive,
maybe a PlayStation 1.
77
00:04:28,855 --> 00:04:31,454
But when you opens it,
try and looked surprised.
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00:04:31,457 --> 00:04:36,576
Cos your mother's been through
enough this year without you sulking all over the shop.
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00:04:36,580 --> 00:04:40,620
Now, here's a gift
from me and Rudolph. Be on your way.
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00:04:42,223 --> 00:04:44,382
All right, Gav, what's appertaining?
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00:04:44,385 --> 00:04:47,584
Oh, Rudolph. How's the boy?
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00:04:47,587 --> 00:04:50,546
Neil? Yeah. He's fine, Father.
83
00:04:50,548 --> 00:04:52,068
Crackin'.
84
00:04:55,071 --> 00:04:56,990
No, thanks. Look, what it is...
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00:04:56,992 --> 00:05:00,071
Oh, Gav. I'm not being funny,
you've gotta sit on the knee.
86
00:05:00,074 --> 00:05:01,873
It's the rules. What?
87
00:05:01,875 --> 00:05:04,635
Don't worry, I've been checked.
I'm not on the register.
88
00:05:11,922 --> 00:05:13,521
Look, it's a bit delicate.
89
00:05:13,523 --> 00:05:15,522
Go for it.
90
00:05:15,524 --> 00:05:18,843
I've been offered a job. In Cardiff.
Tidy.
91
00:05:18,846 --> 00:05:23,285
It's with the same company
and it's only for six months... Well, I say same company...
92
00:05:23,289 --> 00:05:26,528
Oh, Gav, spare me the details,
where to you going with this? Well,
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00:05:26,531 --> 00:05:29,610
I hope you won't take this
the wrong way but we were wondering
94
00:05:29,612 --> 00:05:32,411
how you'd feel about letting
Stace have her room back?
95
00:05:32,414 --> 00:05:36,853
It's just we don't know how it's
gonna work out and there's no point us getting a place...
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00:05:36,857 --> 00:05:39,777
Leave it with me.
WHISTLES PATHETICALLY
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00:05:45,062 --> 00:05:46,702
FAILED WHISTLE
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00:05:50,825 --> 00:05:54,024
AND ANOTHER
Oh, Rudolph!
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00:05:54,027 --> 00:05:55,706
Father?
100
00:05:55,708 --> 00:05:59,547
Can me and Neil move in the caravan
with you? Gav's got a job.
101
00:05:59,551 --> 00:06:02,950
He needs the room at Gwen's.
Sure thing, sugar tits.
102
00:06:02,953 --> 00:06:06,512
Done and dusted, kippers
and custard. Now, I gotta get on.
103
00:06:06,515 --> 00:06:12,114
Here's your gift. Actually, Ness,
he's not eligible for the gift. He only paid a pound. Right.
104
00:06:12,119 --> 00:06:16,518
We'll see you tonight down Essex.
You coming with us on the bus?
105
00:06:16,521 --> 00:06:19,800
Nah, I've got the car. I gotta get
back cos there's wrapping to do...
106
00:06:19,803 --> 00:06:23,042
Oh, Gav. It's not all about you
and I got other kids to see.
107
00:06:23,045 --> 00:06:26,404
Now be on your way. Yeah.
108
00:06:26,407 --> 00:06:27,927
Sorry.
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00:06:34,092 --> 00:06:35,732
♪ It's Christmas time
110
00:06:38,255 --> 00:06:40,535
♪ There's no need to be afraid
111
00:06:42,457 --> 00:06:45,216
♪ At Christmas time
112
00:06:45,219 --> 00:06:49,579
♪ We let in light
And we banish shade
113
00:06:51,103 --> 00:06:55,342
♪ But in our world of plenty... ♪
114
00:06:55,345 --> 00:06:56,864
Oh, come on, dickhead!
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00:06:56,866 --> 00:06:58,985
♪ ..smile of joy
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00:06:58,987 --> 00:07:02,946
♪ Throw your arms... ♪
Oh, just go, mate!
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00:07:02,950 --> 00:07:04,909
♪ ..at Christmas time... ♪
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00:07:04,911 --> 00:07:07,830
HONKS HORN
119
00:07:07,833 --> 00:07:14,832
♪ But say a prayer
Pray for the other ones... ♪
120
00:07:14,837 --> 00:07:16,476
MOBILE RINGS
121
00:07:16,478 --> 00:07:18,757
♪ At Christmas time
122
00:07:18,760 --> 00:07:22,519
♪ It's hard but when
you're having fun... ♪
123
00:07:22,522 --> 00:07:24,401
Gavelar!
124
00:07:24,403 --> 00:07:29,642
♪ There's a world
outside your window... ♪
125
00:07:29,646 --> 00:07:32,445
Come on, sing it!
# A world of dread and fear...
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00:07:32,448 --> 00:07:33,807
Yes!
127
00:07:33,809 --> 00:07:37,648
♪ Where the only water... flowing...
128
00:07:37,651 --> 00:07:39,170
♪ Is the bitter sting...
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00:07:39,172 --> 00:07:41,131
♪ ..of tears
130
00:07:41,133 --> 00:07:45,572
♪ And the Christmas bells
that ring there
131
00:07:45,576 --> 00:07:47,855
♪ Are the clanging chimes of...
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00:07:47,857 --> 00:07:52,816
♪ Doom, it's doom
Well tonight, thank God it's them...
133
00:07:52,821 --> 00:07:55,580
♪ Instead of you... ♪
134
00:07:55,582 --> 00:07:59,381
Oh, my God! That is a great song.
A modern Christmas classic.
135
00:07:59,385 --> 00:08:03,104
Geldof at his best. Don't forget
Majure. Always gets overlooked.
136
00:08:03,107 --> 00:08:07,426
Do you mean Midge Ure? That's what
I said, Majure. It's not one word. It's two. Midge Ure.
137
00:08:07,430 --> 00:08:10,709
Is it? I thought it was Majure.
Like majure cheddar.
138
00:08:10,712 --> 00:08:13,791
Look, anyway,
why have you left me six messages?
139
00:08:13,793 --> 00:08:17,472
SHOUTS: Because it's Christmas!
140
00:08:17,476 --> 00:08:19,555
How's the shopping going?
141
00:08:19,557 --> 00:08:21,756
I ain't started. I overslept.
142
00:08:21,758 --> 00:08:24,557
Who've you got to get for.
Everyone I know. Where are you?
143
00:08:24,560 --> 00:08:27,559
Erm, I'm just leaving work.
144
00:08:27,562 --> 00:08:30,361
Are you? I'm just around the corner.
I'll come and meet you.
145
00:08:30,364 --> 00:08:33,163
No, no, no, it's OK.
You've got your shopping to do.
146
00:08:33,165 --> 00:08:35,284
You can help me. I've got time -
two hours.
147
00:08:35,287 --> 00:08:39,646
Well, you can't come here anyway.
Why? What's going on? Nothing.
148
00:08:39,649 --> 00:08:43,888
Er, I've got your present in the car.
What you got me? I'm not saying.
149
00:08:43,892 --> 00:08:46,931
Oh, go on, I'll still act surprised
in front of Stacey. No!
150
00:08:46,934 --> 00:08:49,013
Is it clothes? No. Can I eat it?
151
00:08:49,015 --> 00:08:51,054
No. I know what it is. What?
152
00:08:51,056 --> 00:08:54,015
I'm not saying. Go on, say.
No, you have to guess. What?
153
00:08:54,018 --> 00:08:56,777
Well, you wouldn't tell me.
OK, I can live with that.
154
00:08:56,780 --> 00:08:59,459
Oh, just tell me!
No. Look, I gotta go.
155
00:08:59,462 --> 00:09:03,861
I'll see you tonight. All right.
What time do you want me there? Er, any time, really.
156
00:09:03,864 --> 00:09:05,584
Coolio Iglesias.
157
00:09:07,106 --> 00:09:08,665
Smithy... Yeah?
158
00:09:08,667 --> 00:09:12,746
You're a really good mate. You know
that, don't you. You're so gay!
159
00:09:12,750 --> 00:09:14,389
See ya.
160
00:09:14,391 --> 00:09:19,430
Laters. # ..Feed the world
161
00:09:19,434 --> 00:09:23,673
♪ Let them know it's Christmas time
162
00:09:23,676 --> 00:09:27,275
♪ Feed the world
163
00:09:27,279 --> 00:09:31,358
♪ Let them know it's Christmas time
164
00:09:31,361 --> 00:09:33,280
♪ Feed the... ♪
165
00:09:33,282 --> 00:09:37,321
Hiya, luv, come in! I won't stop,
I've got a million things to do.
166
00:09:37,325 --> 00:09:38,964
I just wanted to give you this.
167
00:09:38,966 --> 00:09:42,005
Oh, thanks, Gwen.
Did you like the talc?
168
00:09:42,008 --> 00:09:45,687
Well, I've not opened it yet.
I was keeping it for Christmas Day.
169
00:09:45,690 --> 00:09:48,889
Well, it's talc, it is.
170
00:09:48,892 --> 00:09:51,691
Right, I'll be off then.
171
00:09:51,694 --> 00:09:53,613
Bye, luv. See you tomorrow.
172
00:09:53,615 --> 00:09:56,254
See you, Gwen. Bye, Scott.
173
00:09:56,256 --> 00:09:59,015
How's it all going?
He's good as gold he is, Gwen.
174
00:09:59,018 --> 00:10:02,537
I'm meeting his mother tomorrow,
spending the day with them.
175
00:10:02,540 --> 00:10:06,099
Oh, I know Alison, we were
in Guides together. Were you?
176
00:10:06,103 --> 00:10:07,982
Happy Christmas Eve, one and all!
177
00:10:07,984 --> 00:10:09,943
Happy Christmas!
178
00:10:09,945 --> 00:10:12,224
That's a big one, Bryn. I know!
179
00:10:12,226 --> 00:10:17,945
Phew! We're only there for two days
but I've got all the presents, haven't I?
180
00:10:17,950 --> 00:10:21,669
Well, there'll be plenty of room
on the bus. Now. Nessa and Dave.
181
00:10:21,672 --> 00:10:26,071
What's their ETA?
Estimated time of arrival? Half two.
182
00:10:26,075 --> 00:10:30,074
Well, in that case, there's plenty
of time for a glass of this.
183
00:10:30,077 --> 00:10:34,396
Doris, will you join us
in a mint Baileys for Christmas?
184
00:10:34,400 --> 00:10:36,239
I won't, Bryn.
185
00:10:36,241 --> 00:10:38,040
I've been drinking all day.
186
00:10:38,042 --> 00:10:40,121
I'm drunk now if the truth be told.
187
00:10:40,123 --> 00:10:43,882
The thing with Scott is,
he's a bit of a pot-head, he is.
188
00:10:43,886 --> 00:10:48,525
He loves his skunk and he's been
trying to get me to have a go.
189
00:10:48,529 --> 00:10:51,608
Well, the thing is,
I did all that back in the '60s.
190
00:10:51,611 --> 00:10:53,530
Bongs and... Happy memories, eh?
191
00:10:53,532 --> 00:10:59,651
I know, and I said to him,
you knock yourself out, luv, but I'm sticking to the wine.
192
00:10:59,655 --> 00:11:05,454
Well, that was 10 o'clock this
morning and to tell you the truth, Gwen, I'm absolutely twatted.
193
00:11:05,459 --> 00:11:08,859
Well, that's what Christmas
is all about, isn't it?
194
00:11:12,944 --> 00:11:14,623
Stacey!
195
00:11:14,625 --> 00:11:16,745
Stacey!
196
00:11:27,473 --> 00:11:29,752
Ow! Oh...
197
00:11:29,754 --> 00:11:33,593
Are you all right?
No, that really hurt... What you doing here?
198
00:11:33,596 --> 00:11:38,275
Right, I've got an hour to do all my
presents and I need your discount. What is it? 60, 70%? 20.
199
00:11:38,279 --> 00:11:41,678
That'll have to do. It's a sackable
offence to share our discount.
200
00:11:41,681 --> 00:11:44,400
What's the point of working here
then?! What do you need?
201
00:11:44,403 --> 00:11:46,962
Talc for Nana Joyce,
talc for Jackie Collins.
202
00:11:46,965 --> 00:11:50,484
Jackie Collins? My other nan.
She's called Jackie Collins.
203
00:11:50,487 --> 00:11:52,966
Talc. Really? Talc?
Well, y'know, bath shit.
204
00:11:52,968 --> 00:11:55,167
We've got some lovely bath shit
quite cheap.
205
00:11:55,170 --> 00:11:58,409
Dream. Jumper for Mum or a blouse or
a skirt or a pair of shoes or a hat.
206
00:11:58,412 --> 00:12:02,531
Already got a CD for Rudi, I just
need some underwear for Lucy. OK. Cool.
207
00:12:02,534 --> 00:12:04,773
So are you two definitely
back together then?
208
00:12:04,776 --> 00:12:09,295
I'm hoping the present will
swing it. I've got a Tiffany bracelet and My Little Pony.
209
00:12:09,298 --> 00:12:12,937
My Little...? She collects them.
Them and Sylvanian Families.
210
00:12:12,941 --> 00:12:17,500
OK. Well, are you thinking thong or
full pants or what? I dunno really.
211
00:12:17,503 --> 00:12:20,022
Not full pants.
Well, the thong is like this,
212
00:12:20,025 --> 00:12:24,584
goes right up. Or you've got
something like this, which shows a bit of bum cheek.
213
00:12:24,588 --> 00:12:27,427
Or see these ones I'm wearing,
these are from here.
214
00:12:27,429 --> 00:12:30,789
You'd never know. They're lush!
See the bit of detailing?
215
00:12:32,913 --> 00:12:35,992
Yeah, I mean that's...
Something like that's fine.
216
00:12:35,995 --> 00:12:39,394
Now what about a bra? Do you want
something comfy or sluttish?
217
00:12:39,397 --> 00:12:43,076
I honestly don't know. Well, do
you want to uplift them like this...
218
00:12:43,079 --> 00:12:44,959
or push 'em in like this?
219
00:12:48,322 --> 00:12:50,201
That, the...
220
00:12:50,203 --> 00:12:54,682
That one. The second one.
I got you! Come with me.
221
00:12:54,686 --> 00:12:56,925
I'm worried about this bird, y'know.
222
00:12:56,928 --> 00:12:58,807
Why, darling? I dunno. The water,
223
00:12:58,809 --> 00:13:01,688
the bucket, the soaking,
all this other nonsense.
224
00:13:01,691 --> 00:13:03,690
But if it's what Nigella says.
225
00:13:03,692 --> 00:13:07,171
Yeah, and Pete says it's fabulous,
but I'm just not confident.
226
00:13:07,174 --> 00:13:08,933
Not with so many eating with us.
227
00:13:08,935 --> 00:13:14,174
I should've stuck with Jamie Oliver.
I know where I am with him. Oh, look at that, "From John".
228
00:13:14,178 --> 00:13:16,337
What a waste of a tree.
229
00:13:16,340 --> 00:13:18,219
John who? John Rotary?
230
00:13:18,221 --> 00:13:20,700
I don't know, Mick. It could be
mechanic John,
231
00:13:20,702 --> 00:13:22,181
John with the glasses...
232
00:13:22,183 --> 00:13:24,022
it won't be John
from Ann and John.
233
00:13:24,024 --> 00:13:27,023
What about John Snape?
It could be John Snape.
234
00:13:27,026 --> 00:13:29,065
Could be. Yeah, it'll be John Snape.
235
00:13:29,067 --> 00:13:33,386
Yeah, peppercorns, peppercorns,
Pam. How many's a handful? Ten?
236
00:13:33,390 --> 00:13:35,749
No, more than that.
237
00:13:35,751 --> 00:13:38,190
That's John Snape!
238
00:13:38,193 --> 00:13:41,712
What is the point of sending cards
that arrive on Christmas Eve?
239
00:13:41,715 --> 00:13:43,794
They'll get taken down
in a few days.
240
00:13:43,796 --> 00:13:46,875
That's why I send all mine
on the first of November.
241
00:13:46,878 --> 00:13:49,037
Gives people seven weeks
to enjoy them.
242
00:13:49,040 --> 00:13:52,759
Oh, here they are! Oh, lovely!
243
00:13:52,762 --> 00:13:55,802
THEY GOBBLE LIKE TURKEYS
244
00:13:59,926 --> 00:14:03,765
Pam, that's a chicken,
you silly mare! Oh, yeah!
245
00:14:03,769 --> 00:14:07,848
So come on, where is she?
She's in the garage, come on, let's go and get her.
246
00:14:07,851 --> 00:14:09,810
What do I owe you, Mick? 56.
247
00:14:09,812 --> 00:14:12,291
£56! Bloody hell, Pam.
248
00:14:12,294 --> 00:14:14,493
It is a nice one though, Dawn.
249
00:14:14,495 --> 00:14:16,574
It's a Norfolk Kerry Bronze.
250
00:14:16,577 --> 00:14:19,936
I know, but there's only the four
of us. What about Pete's mum?
251
00:14:19,939 --> 00:14:21,578
She barely eats, poor love.
252
00:14:21,580 --> 00:14:25,059
She might have a bit of mashed up
banana but that's about it.
253
00:14:25,062 --> 00:14:27,821
Ah, where is she now?
We put her to bed.
254
00:14:27,824 --> 00:14:31,223
Couple of Nitol, she'll be out
of it till the morning. Oh, right.
255
00:14:31,226 --> 00:14:34,265
Pete's got one of them alarm things,
you know, so she wakes up,
256
00:14:34,267 --> 00:14:37,026
she just pulls a cord,
he'll be round there like a shot.
257
00:14:37,029 --> 00:14:38,668
Did you get a card from John?
258
00:14:38,670 --> 00:14:43,829
John? Oh, it was your John,
step-brother John!
259
00:14:43,833 --> 00:14:46,312
Does he just write, "From John"?
That's him!
260
00:14:46,315 --> 00:14:49,474
Do you know,
he's been to Nepal three times!
261
00:14:49,477 --> 00:14:53,596
Dawn, she is a beauty!
262
00:14:53,599 --> 00:14:56,998
It was Dawn's John! Step-brother,
John. Step-brother John.
263
00:14:57,001 --> 00:14:59,960
Were you confused 'cos he just
writes, "From John,"?
264
00:14:59,963 --> 00:15:03,522
Yeah! You know, he's been
to Nepal three times.
265
00:15:03,525 --> 00:15:07,084
MISTLETOE AND WINE PLAYS ON TV
266
00:15:07,088 --> 00:15:09,487
Gosh. That is nice.
267
00:15:09,489 --> 00:15:13,248
You think you've tried it all,
you think there can't possibly
268
00:15:13,251 --> 00:15:16,610
be anywhere else to go with it,
and then they come up with this.
269
00:15:16,614 --> 00:15:18,213
Mint Baileys!
270
00:15:18,215 --> 00:15:20,134
I mean, what will they think of next?
271
00:15:20,136 --> 00:15:23,735
I know.
It's like the white Toblerone Can you get white Toblerones?
272
00:15:23,738 --> 00:15:27,537
Yes. I've got some for tomorrow.
Well, I for one can't wait!
273
00:15:27,540 --> 00:15:31,499
Not just for the Toblerone,
but for the whole thing.
274
00:15:31,503 --> 00:15:36,062
Do you know this will be my first
Christmas outside of South Wales?
275
00:15:36,065 --> 00:15:37,585
Me too.
276
00:15:38,787 --> 00:15:40,386
HORN TOOTS
277
00:15:40,388 --> 00:15:42,668
That's them. Here they are.
278
00:15:47,753 --> 00:15:49,752
Merry Christmas to you all.
279
00:15:49,754 --> 00:15:52,953
David. Hiya, Dave.
280
00:15:52,956 --> 00:15:56,155
How did you get on today?
I reckon we cleared about 70 quid.
281
00:15:56,158 --> 00:15:58,157
Not bad.
282
00:15:58,159 --> 00:16:00,398
Any more complaints about the gifts?
283
00:16:00,400 --> 00:16:04,159
One or two but that's par
for the course. Where is he?
284
00:16:04,163 --> 00:16:09,002
Oh, look! Hello, my lovely.
You gonna come to your Aunty Gwen?
285
00:16:09,006 --> 00:16:12,325
Cheers, Gwen.
I'm going down the back for a smoke.
286
00:16:12,328 --> 00:16:14,447
All right, love. Right.
287
00:16:14,449 --> 00:16:16,249
Christmas in Essex here we come!
288
00:16:25,616 --> 00:16:28,775
Hiya! They've started early.
289
00:16:28,778 --> 00:16:30,377
They work in Dixons, they do.
290
00:16:30,379 --> 00:16:34,098
Did you get Nessa's present? Yes.
I got her some goalkeeping gloves.
291
00:16:34,101 --> 00:16:35,940
Goalkeeping gloves?
292
00:16:35,942 --> 00:16:39,501
Yeah. Sondicos they are, Gav.
Would she want a pair of them?
293
00:16:39,505 --> 00:16:41,504
She's thinking about getting
back to it.
294
00:16:41,506 --> 00:16:45,865
She used to coach at Coventry City.
Still good friends with Steve Ogrizovic. OK.
295
00:16:45,868 --> 00:16:47,467
Come on, then. Let's get a move on.
296
00:16:47,469 --> 00:16:50,708
Don't I get a kiss?
No, you haven't got any mistletoe.
297
00:16:50,711 --> 00:16:52,991
I have, but it's in my pants. Gav!
298
00:16:55,314 --> 00:16:58,633
Well done on the job, babes.
Thanks. Have you told your dad yet?
299
00:16:58,636 --> 00:17:02,715
No. Do you think your mum will be OK?
No. What about Smithy?
300
00:17:02,719 --> 00:17:04,799
He'll never speak to me again.
301
00:17:16,727 --> 00:17:19,566
Now you've got to be careful
on this next level.
302
00:17:19,569 --> 00:17:24,728
You think they're gonna come at you
from the back of the truck and suddenly they come round the wall.
303
00:17:24,732 --> 00:17:28,291
I got you. Oh, Gwen. How's the baby?
304
00:17:28,295 --> 00:17:30,614
Oh, he's fine, love.
305
00:17:30,616 --> 00:17:32,895
He's enjoying the massage, he is.
306
00:17:32,897 --> 00:17:37,136
Dave, you just let us know when
you want to get going. Cheers, Gwen.
307
00:17:37,140 --> 00:17:40,140
I just needed a break from
the driving, you know.
308
00:17:44,184 --> 00:17:45,863
I'm not sure about this, Pete.
309
00:17:45,865 --> 00:17:47,544
Have I put it in too early?
310
00:17:47,546 --> 00:17:50,905
What harm's it gonna do?
It's only a bucket of water, Mick.
311
00:17:50,908 --> 00:17:53,427
There's cinnamon
and all sorts in there.
312
00:17:53,430 --> 00:17:55,989
I won't be putting mine in
till I go to bed.
313
00:17:55,992 --> 00:17:59,311
What? Oh, don't say that.
Right, I'm gonna take it out.
314
00:17:59,314 --> 00:18:02,673
I would! Yeah, take it out.
Put it back in later.
315
00:18:02,676 --> 00:18:04,835
BEEPER GOES
316
00:18:04,837 --> 00:18:08,076
Right, Dawn, we have got to go.
This has gone off four times now.
317
00:18:08,079 --> 00:18:10,718
She'll be OK.
What's the worst that could happen?
318
00:18:10,721 --> 00:18:13,520
She's locked in. I just think
I should check, that's all.
319
00:18:13,522 --> 00:18:17,721
Well, you go then, and come back
later when the Barry lot've arrived.
320
00:18:17,725 --> 00:18:20,244
All right.
Well, I'll just finish this.
321
00:18:20,246 --> 00:18:21,405
BEEPER
322
00:18:21,407 --> 00:18:24,686
No, I've really got to go.
All right, my love.
323
00:18:24,689 --> 00:18:27,008
Mick?
I'm just gonna check on my mum.
324
00:18:27,011 --> 00:18:29,691
I'll be back in a bit.
She does my head in.
325
00:18:32,094 --> 00:18:34,533
Hello, you two.
Hiya. Happy Christmas. You off?
326
00:18:34,535 --> 00:18:36,254
I just gotta check on my mum.
327
00:18:36,256 --> 00:18:39,695
See you. Hi, Gav, hi, Stace. Hiya!
328
00:18:39,698 --> 00:18:42,698
Hiya! You fancy some bubbly?
Yes, please.
329
00:18:45,022 --> 00:18:48,461
How'd you get on? I got it!
Oh, come here.
330
00:18:48,464 --> 00:18:51,543
Well done, mate. How do you feel?
331
00:18:51,546 --> 00:18:53,225
Well, good, I think.
332
00:18:53,227 --> 00:18:55,346
But what about Mum? And Smithy?
333
00:18:55,348 --> 00:18:57,787
Listen, it's all gonna be all right.
334
00:18:57,790 --> 00:19:00,109
Should I wait till
after Christmas to say?
335
00:19:00,111 --> 00:19:04,310
What's the point? Tell 'em tonight.
They've got all of Christmas then to get used to it.
336
00:19:04,314 --> 00:19:06,433
What are you two whispering about?
337
00:19:06,435 --> 00:19:10,154
Turkey! Oh, it's like
he's got another woman, Gav.
338
00:19:10,157 --> 00:19:12,637
I'm gonna open some more wine.
339
00:19:14,920 --> 00:19:17,599
DOORBELL CHIMES
340
00:19:17,602 --> 00:19:22,281
Smithy! Pamela! Noel! Noel!
341
00:19:22,285 --> 00:19:25,204
God rest ye merry gentlemen.
342
00:19:25,206 --> 00:19:28,845
Gavalarenus! Stacerini!
343
00:19:28,849 --> 00:19:32,968
Get in here now! Dawn Cheadle,
star of Ocean's 11 and 12!
344
00:19:32,971 --> 00:19:35,810
Somewhat overlooked in 13.
When the hell are we getting it on?
345
00:19:35,813 --> 00:19:39,052
Hello, darling.
Ooh, someone's been on the booze.
346
00:19:39,055 --> 00:19:42,494
Where's Pete? Where's P Diddly?
He's gone to check on his mum.
347
00:19:42,497 --> 00:19:45,096
Not locking her in this Christmas?
Smithy!
348
00:19:45,099 --> 00:19:47,498
You're chipper. It's Christmas, Gav.
349
00:19:47,500 --> 00:19:50,859
My son's on his way down. Spending
my first Christmas with my boy.
350
00:19:50,862 --> 00:19:54,141
Unfortunately his mother and
boyfriend are coming too. Plus,
351
00:19:54,144 --> 00:19:59,623
Mick's doing some Nigella shit
with that turkey that I cannot WAIT to get inside me!
352
00:19:59,628 --> 00:20:02,347
Come on, Eileen!
353
00:20:02,349 --> 00:20:05,588
Chinese Alan's got two tickets
for the West Ham game. 3rd Feb.
354
00:20:05,591 --> 00:20:08,550
I said we'd be up for it.
Yeah, great, definitely.
355
00:20:08,553 --> 00:20:10,672
Mid-week game, under the lights.
356
00:20:10,674 --> 00:20:12,633
Is it?
Let's see nearer the time.
357
00:20:12,636 --> 00:20:14,875
Shall I stick my presents
under the tree?
358
00:20:14,877 --> 00:20:18,996
What've you got?! Didn't have no
wrapping paper. So I used tin foil.
359
00:20:19,000 --> 00:20:21,719
But it's actually a dream,
cos you need no sellotape.
360
00:20:21,721 --> 00:20:23,440
You just scrunch and done.
361
00:20:23,442 --> 00:20:27,561
Right, let's get this party started.
Who's for a beveragey?
362
00:20:27,565 --> 00:20:29,164
PHONE RINGS
363
00:20:29,166 --> 00:20:30,806
Ooh. I've got it.
364
00:20:32,768 --> 00:20:34,847
Le Gavlar Residence.
365
00:20:34,849 --> 00:20:36,728
All right. What's occurring?
366
00:20:36,730 --> 00:20:38,249
Oh, hey. You all right?
367
00:20:38,251 --> 00:20:40,410
How you doing? How's Neil?
368
00:20:40,413 --> 00:20:44,092
He's all right.
He's been a bit sick, he has.
369
00:20:44,095 --> 00:20:46,014
Oh, my God, is he OK?
370
00:20:46,016 --> 00:20:48,135
He's fine. It's completely normal.
371
00:20:48,137 --> 00:20:51,616
We'll be there in an hour.
All right? Yeah, great.
372
00:20:51,620 --> 00:20:54,339
Just want to make sure
Pam keeps us some food, like.
373
00:20:54,341 --> 00:20:57,740
Yeah. I'm sure it will be fine.
374
00:20:57,743 --> 00:21:02,622
Right, I'll see you then. Yeah.
All right.
375
00:21:02,626 --> 00:21:04,985
Who was that? Them lot.
They'll be here in an hour.
376
00:21:04,988 --> 00:21:07,307
Ooh! Better get me quiches in!
377
00:21:07,309 --> 00:21:10,188
Was that Smithy? Yeah.
378
00:21:10,191 --> 00:21:13,110
How is he? All right? Yeah.
379
00:21:13,113 --> 00:21:16,712
Turn it up, Dave. I love Chris Rea.
380
00:21:16,715 --> 00:21:20,754
♪ And it's been so long
381
00:21:20,758 --> 00:21:26,597
♪ But I will be there
I sing this song
382
00:21:26,601 --> 00:21:30,120
♪ To pass the time away
383
00:21:30,123 --> 00:21:32,682
♪ Driving in my car
384
00:21:32,685 --> 00:21:35,565
♪ Driving home from Christmas
385
00:21:39,009 --> 00:21:40,968
♪ It's gonna take some time
386
00:21:40,970 --> 00:21:43,090
♪ But I'll get there
387
00:21:44,692 --> 00:21:48,451
♪ Top to toe in tailbacks
388
00:21:48,455 --> 00:21:52,175
♪ Oh, I got red lights all around
389
00:21:54,498 --> 00:21:59,577
♪ But soon there'll be a freeway
Yeah
390
00:21:59,581 --> 00:22:05,060
♪ He's driving home, driving home
391
00:22:05,065 --> 00:22:07,304
♪ Driving home for Christmas... ♪
392
00:22:07,306 --> 00:22:09,225
..Absolutely covered in the stuff.
393
00:22:09,227 --> 00:22:11,586
Oh, my God. It's them. They're here!
They're here.
394
00:22:11,589 --> 00:22:13,829
It's them. Oh, my god.
395
00:22:16,632 --> 00:22:19,391
Hiya! Bryn's got mistletoe!
396
00:22:19,394 --> 00:22:21,633
Who's first?
397
00:22:21,635 --> 00:22:24,074
Merry Christmas.
Where is he? Where's my boy?
398
00:22:24,076 --> 00:22:28,516
Hang on. Not till
you've done the mistletoe. Brynlar!
399
00:22:30,560 --> 00:22:33,959
Who's next? Mick!
Happy Christmas, Bryn.
400
00:22:33,963 --> 00:22:37,482
Here you go. Happy Christmas.
401
00:22:37,485 --> 00:22:41,525
Continental! Gavin.
You're the only one left.
402
00:22:48,652 --> 00:22:51,411
You OK? How was the journey?
Yeah, it was all right.
403
00:22:51,413 --> 00:22:55,052
I kept him awake most of the time
so he should sleep through tonight.
404
00:22:55,056 --> 00:22:58,415
Yeah? Are you gonna sleep all
the way till Christmas morning, eh?
405
00:22:58,418 --> 00:23:01,817
And see what Santa brings you? Yeah?
BABY CRIES
406
00:23:01,820 --> 00:23:03,859
What's all this?
407
00:23:03,861 --> 00:23:06,540
Come on. Ssh.
408
00:23:06,543 --> 00:23:10,062
He probably needs changing.
What's brought this on, little man?
409
00:23:10,065 --> 00:23:13,225
Give him here a minute. It's all
right. I got a special trick.
410
00:23:14,227 --> 00:23:16,786
CRYING STOPS
411
00:23:16,789 --> 00:23:19,948
Where to shall I put him down, Mick?
412
00:23:19,951 --> 00:23:22,591
In the back room.
I'll bring your stuff through.
413
00:23:25,274 --> 00:23:28,034
Right, everyone. Come on! Food!
414
00:23:40,203 --> 00:23:47,082
♪ Rockin' around the Christmas tree
Have a Christmas party hop
415
00:23:47,088 --> 00:23:51,407
♪ Mistletoe hung where you can
see... ♪
416
00:23:51,410 --> 00:23:54,529
I do find that Dave attractive,
you know, Pam.
417
00:23:54,532 --> 00:23:57,371
You do know he lives
in a caravan like a gyppo?
418
00:23:57,374 --> 00:24:02,253
Ah! Really? See, that's even
more of a turn on. Free spirit.
419
00:24:02,257 --> 00:24:05,656
You like the gingers, don't you?
420
00:24:05,659 --> 00:24:07,618
I do. I always have, Pam.
421
00:24:07,620 --> 00:24:10,059
Not too ginger, like Chris Evans.
422
00:24:10,062 --> 00:24:13,942
I like them more Charles Dance
or Anthony Worral Thompson.
423
00:24:15,505 --> 00:24:19,824
Gav was in Cardiff today?
And he never came to see us? He couldn't. He had to get back.
424
00:24:19,828 --> 00:24:23,067
No-one else knew he was there,
only Mick. When will he find out?
425
00:24:23,070 --> 00:24:25,749
He already has.
He starts in two weeks.
426
00:24:25,751 --> 00:24:28,950
I'm coming back home, Mam!
Oh, Stace, that's fantastic!
427
00:24:28,953 --> 00:24:32,232
Don't tell anyone. We haven't told
Pam yet. Oh, my god!
428
00:24:32,235 --> 00:24:33,555
DOORBELL
I'll get it.
429
00:24:37,238 --> 00:24:41,837
Hiya, Pete. Come in. This is my mum.
Hiya! Dawn, it's Pete.
430
00:24:41,841 --> 00:24:44,281
He's brought Edna. What?
431
00:24:45,644 --> 00:24:52,363
Everyone, this is Edna, Pete's mum.
Hello, Edna. How's it going?
432
00:24:52,368 --> 00:24:56,127
All right? Can I get you something,
darling? She just needs to sit down.
433
00:24:56,130 --> 00:25:00,289
Pete, what the hell are you doing
bringing her here? Don't. It's been a nightmare.
434
00:25:00,293 --> 00:25:02,612
By the time I put her to bed,
she needed the loo.
435
00:25:02,614 --> 00:25:05,493
Every time I tried to leave,
she'd press the alarm again.
436
00:25:05,496 --> 00:25:07,095
In the end I just gave up.
437
00:25:07,097 --> 00:25:08,737
Here y'are. Get this down you.
438
00:25:09,818 --> 00:25:14,217
Hello. My name is Bryn.
It means hill in Welsh.
439
00:25:14,221 --> 00:25:18,940
I wouldn't bother. She doesn't
speak. Hasn't said a word in years.
440
00:25:18,944 --> 00:25:20,304
Ahem!
441
00:25:22,426 --> 00:25:25,105
DOORBELL
Merry Christmas. I'll get it.
442
00:25:25,108 --> 00:25:27,627
You sure? I've got my mistletoe.
443
00:25:27,629 --> 00:25:29,548
Merry Christmas!
444
00:25:29,551 --> 00:25:31,151
Merry Christmas, Uncle Bryn.
445
00:25:32,873 --> 00:25:34,473
Jason...
446
00:25:36,035 --> 00:25:38,234
Can I come in? Course, course.
447
00:25:38,236 --> 00:25:39,995
Jason's here, everyone!
448
00:25:39,997 --> 00:25:45,596
Oh, lovely. Yes, Jaynana.
Making you a Snowball.
449
00:25:45,600 --> 00:25:47,879
Hello. Happy Christmas.
450
00:25:47,882 --> 00:25:50,081
Hello, Dawn.
451
00:25:50,083 --> 00:25:52,842
Mick! Jason's here!
452
00:25:52,845 --> 00:25:54,365
Come on!
453
00:25:55,967 --> 00:26:00,607
I've been online. There's a lot
of people have had problems with this turkey recipe.
454
00:26:05,132 --> 00:26:07,411
Guys, guys. Can I just...?
455
00:26:07,414 --> 00:26:08,934
Stace, do you wanna?
456
00:26:10,896 --> 00:26:14,895
OK, well, now that Jason's here,
we've got something we want to tell you all.
457
00:26:14,898 --> 00:26:17,097
Oh, my god. You're pregnant!
458
00:26:17,100 --> 00:26:19,859
Didn't I say, Mick? Didn't I say?
459
00:26:19,861 --> 00:26:21,900
Mum, Mum. Stacey's not pregnant.
460
00:26:21,903 --> 00:26:23,142
Oh. What are you like?
461
00:26:23,144 --> 00:26:26,103
Every time he opens his mouth,
you think she's pregnant.
462
00:26:26,105 --> 00:26:30,064
OK, well,
I'm just gonna come out with it.
463
00:26:30,068 --> 00:26:34,547
The company I work for
about a year and a half ago, bought into another company.
464
00:26:34,551 --> 00:26:37,350
Oh!
465
00:26:37,352 --> 00:26:41,191
They expanded and as a result,
I've been offered a promotion.
466
00:26:41,195 --> 00:26:43,834
CHEERING
That's the spirit Gavlar!
467
00:26:43,836 --> 00:26:49,435
Chin chin! Right. Thanks, yeah.
I'm really chuffed. And the other good news...
468
00:26:49,440 --> 00:26:54,479
Well, WE see it as good news, is that
the new job is with the new branch.
469
00:26:54,483 --> 00:26:57,162
There's swish! In Cardiff.
470
00:26:57,164 --> 00:26:59,563
Cardiff?
You're gonna be knackered, mate.
471
00:26:59,566 --> 00:27:03,845
That's a seven-hour round trip,
every day. They paying your expenses?
472
00:27:03,849 --> 00:27:06,128
No, the thing is..
473
00:27:06,130 --> 00:27:08,209
We're moving back to Barry.
474
00:27:08,211 --> 00:27:12,330
What?! Just for the first
six months to see how it goes.
475
00:27:12,334 --> 00:27:16,373
Six months? Oh, I get it. You!
You couldn't wait, could you?
476
00:27:16,376 --> 00:27:19,895
Six months! From day one, you got
your claws in and now you're
477
00:27:19,898 --> 00:27:23,257
trying to take him away from me.
Look, let me just explain.
478
00:27:23,260 --> 00:27:25,779
Calm down. Why are you shouting?
479
00:27:25,782 --> 00:27:28,821
I'm not shouting. Listen to the tone
of your voice...
480
00:27:28,824 --> 00:27:30,263
It's a really good deal.
481
00:27:30,265 --> 00:27:32,504
How do you know?
482
00:27:32,506 --> 00:27:34,865
Gavin told me a few weeks back.
483
00:27:34,868 --> 00:27:37,507
What, so he knew about this? Yeah.
484
00:27:37,509 --> 00:27:39,748
And I did. Stacey wanted me to know.
485
00:27:39,751 --> 00:27:43,190
Oh, I can just hear you.
You and her and her in cahoots...
486
00:27:43,193 --> 00:27:45,392
I thought we agreed
only to talk to Dad?
487
00:27:45,394 --> 00:27:47,633
I was excited, Gav.
488
00:27:47,635 --> 00:27:49,434
..The bitches of Eastwick!
489
00:27:49,437 --> 00:27:51,276
Don't bring me into this, Pam.
490
00:27:51,278 --> 00:27:53,637
You ARE in this, Vanessa.
491
00:27:53,639 --> 00:27:55,558
How? What's Ness got to do with it?
492
00:27:55,560 --> 00:28:01,759
If you wanna make something of it,
I'll see you outside. No problem. Right, come on then.
493
00:28:01,764 --> 00:28:05,123
You don't want to do that, Pam. She
was South Wales wrestling champion.
494
00:28:05,126 --> 00:28:08,245
I don't care. I'll take
the lot of you on, you bloody...
495
00:28:08,248 --> 00:28:10,607
You Taffs!
You want some, do you, Pam?
496
00:28:10,610 --> 00:28:12,369
This is ridiculous!
497
00:28:12,371 --> 00:28:15,450
Let's not make turn this into
a race issue. Leave it out, Bryn.
498
00:28:15,453 --> 00:28:19,772
This is getting out of control.
Why doesn't everyone just calm down?
499
00:28:19,775 --> 00:28:21,294
This is nothing to do with you.
500
00:28:21,296 --> 00:28:24,775
- I'll back you all the way.
Hit her in the face. - What you saying, Dawn?
501
00:28:24,778 --> 00:28:29,137
I'm telling her to punch you
in the face, you truck-driving dyke.
502
00:28:29,141 --> 00:28:30,740
Oh, Pete. Control your wife.
503
00:28:30,742 --> 00:28:34,581
I'll control you in a minute,
sunshine. Come on, then. Come on, then!
504
00:28:34,584 --> 00:28:35,943
Whoa, whoa. I got your back.
505
00:28:35,945 --> 00:28:38,784
Stay out of it, fat man.
This is between me and Scrappy Doo.
506
00:28:38,787 --> 00:28:43,746
What'd you call me? Please don't
make this harder than it already is. Make it harder than it already is?!
507
00:28:43,750 --> 00:28:44,950
SHRIEKS
508
00:28:47,632 --> 00:28:49,672
You all right, Dave? Yeah.
509
00:28:51,635 --> 00:28:53,994
Sorry, everyone.
510
00:28:53,996 --> 00:28:56,395
No-one talks about
my wife like that.
511
00:28:56,398 --> 00:28:57,917
Oh, my Pete.
512
00:28:57,919 --> 00:29:00,438
Come on, Dawn.
513
00:29:00,440 --> 00:29:03,319
I think we'd better leave.
514
00:29:03,322 --> 00:29:05,321
Night, everyone.
515
00:29:05,323 --> 00:29:06,843
Night, Dawny.
516
00:29:09,446 --> 00:29:11,806
I should go too.
Smithy! Not now, Gav.
517
00:29:14,129 --> 00:29:16,528
I think we should go too,
back to Barry.
518
00:29:16,530 --> 00:29:19,809
This has been a terrible mistake.
No, Bryn, just stop a minute.
519
00:29:19,812 --> 00:29:27,251
It's very late, we've all had
a drink, some more than others, and it's Christmas Eve.
520
00:29:27,257 --> 00:29:32,056
Why don't we just all go to bed,
have a good night's rest, and in the morning we can start again?
521
00:29:32,060 --> 00:29:33,740
What do you think?
522
00:29:45,188 --> 00:29:47,708
I forgot my turkey.
523
00:29:57,195 --> 00:29:59,874
All right? I think so.
524
00:29:59,877 --> 00:30:01,756
Mum's not speaking to me.
525
00:30:01,758 --> 00:30:04,197
She's just hurt I never told
her about it.
526
00:30:04,199 --> 00:30:06,518
She said a Shipman
never keeps secrets.
527
00:30:06,521 --> 00:30:10,400
She'll be all right tomorrow.
She's not gonna not speak to you on Christmas.
528
00:30:10,403 --> 00:30:14,642
Well, it's up to her. If she can't
see this is the right thing to do... Are you sure it is?
529
00:30:14,646 --> 00:30:16,845
Yes! I'm really excited about it.
530
00:30:16,847 --> 00:30:18,726
I love you.
531
00:30:18,728 --> 00:30:20,288
I love you.
532
00:30:58,993 --> 00:31:00,032
Uncle Bryn?
533
00:31:00,034 --> 00:31:02,713
Sorry, I thought you were asleep.
534
00:31:02,715 --> 00:31:04,554
No. I can't get off, to be honest.
535
00:31:04,557 --> 00:31:06,556
Neither can I.
That's why I'm having a milk.
536
00:31:06,558 --> 00:31:10,397
Oh, I might join you. If I
were at home, I'd have a Nesquik,
537
00:31:10,400 --> 00:31:14,839
but I don't think they've got any
and I daren't look through the cupboards.
538
00:31:14,843 --> 00:31:17,282
What flavour do you have? Banana.
539
00:31:17,284 --> 00:31:19,043
Or strawberry.
540
00:31:19,046 --> 00:31:20,566
Or chocolate.
541
00:31:28,651 --> 00:31:31,810
Funny old night...
It doesn't feel like Christmas...
542
00:31:31,813 --> 00:31:34,652
Sorry. All that arguing.
Reminds me of when Dad was alive.
543
00:31:34,655 --> 00:31:38,054
Oh, god! Christmas with your father.
544
00:31:38,057 --> 00:31:42,056
Do you know, it's the one time
of the year I don't miss him.
545
00:31:42,060 --> 00:31:45,899
I know. No turkey. Pork chops!
Pork chops on Christmas Day!
546
00:31:45,902 --> 00:31:48,821
And no presents.
I had to smuggle mine in.
547
00:31:48,824 --> 00:31:55,144
I remember us getting caught
when you gave me that Han Solo. There's me pretending it was mine.
548
00:32:01,191 --> 00:32:03,550
I'm glad we're friends
again, Uncle Bryn.
549
00:32:03,553 --> 00:32:05,473
Me too.
550
00:32:11,478 --> 00:32:14,798
Probably did us a favour,
in the end, you telling Dave.
551
00:32:16,321 --> 00:32:17,841
Yes.
552
00:32:20,443 --> 00:32:23,803
Does he ever,
y'know, does he mention it? No.
553
00:32:25,927 --> 00:32:29,446
There's the occasional comment,
the odd look.
554
00:32:29,449 --> 00:32:33,008
Times when I know he's wondering
how a man and his nephew could...
555
00:32:33,011 --> 00:32:34,931
Yeah, yeah, I know.
556
00:32:38,935 --> 00:32:40,934
Right.
557
00:32:40,936 --> 00:32:42,456
I'm gonna get off. Me too.
558
00:32:44,778 --> 00:32:47,338
Good night, Uncle Bryn.
Good night, Jason.
559
00:32:54,504 --> 00:32:57,504
We were just having a milk.
I need to get some milk for Neil...
560
00:33:00,468 --> 00:33:04,907
David, it is not what you think.
Listen, it's none of my...
561
00:33:04,911 --> 00:33:08,350
You can do whatever you like. Oh,
for God's sake. I'm going to bed.
562
00:33:08,353 --> 00:33:10,672
No, Jason.
563
00:33:10,674 --> 00:33:13,873
We're gonna have this out,
once and for all, man to man.
564
00:33:13,876 --> 00:33:16,595
You don't need to do this, Bryn.
565
00:33:16,598 --> 00:33:19,237
You don't need to put
yourself through this again.
566
00:33:19,239 --> 00:33:21,278
Yes, I do. Please, Uncle Bryn.
567
00:33:21,281 --> 00:33:22,920
No, Jason.
568
00:33:22,922 --> 00:33:26,001
It is time for the truth.
569
00:33:26,004 --> 00:33:29,523
We are going to talk about what
happened on that fishing trip.
570
00:33:29,526 --> 00:33:34,085
Right here, right now. But Bryn,
I already know what happened.
571
00:33:34,089 --> 00:33:37,888
You may know what happened, David.
572
00:33:37,891 --> 00:33:40,051
But you don't know why it happened.
573
00:33:45,896 --> 00:33:51,375
It was freezing cold. It was!
And when you are that cold...
574
00:33:51,379 --> 00:33:53,938
All right?
I was just getting some milk.
575
00:33:53,941 --> 00:33:55,781
Done now. Bed.
576
00:33:58,584 --> 00:34:00,023
Oh, right.
577
00:34:00,025 --> 00:34:03,344
BANGING AND SHUFFLING
578
00:34:03,347 --> 00:34:06,186
Blimey, it's like Piccadilly Circus
in here tonight.
579
00:34:06,188 --> 00:34:08,067
BANGING CONTINUES
580
00:34:08,070 --> 00:34:09,590
Innit, Pam?
581
00:34:12,552 --> 00:34:15,591
Pam? I can't hear you, Michael.
I'm not speaking to you.
582
00:34:15,594 --> 00:34:18,394
Come on, Pam, it's Christmas.
583
00:34:19,917 --> 00:34:22,396
I'm sorry I didn't tell you,
all right?
584
00:34:22,398 --> 00:34:25,838
It just seemed best to wait
and see if he got the job.
585
00:34:31,684 --> 00:34:33,524
Camilla...
586
00:34:35,807 --> 00:34:38,446
I need you, Camilla.
587
00:34:38,448 --> 00:34:41,607
I want you.
588
00:34:41,610 --> 00:34:45,049
Oh, Charles.
Will I ever be your queen?
589
00:34:45,052 --> 00:34:48,491
Yes, you will, right?
So long as you stop this sulking, OK?
590
00:34:48,494 --> 00:34:53,413
We've got guests, and you know and I
know that he's doing the right thing.
591
00:34:53,417 --> 00:34:55,336
He's not going to Mars, Pam.
592
00:34:55,339 --> 00:34:59,458
It's only down the road and
we're all gonna miss him. I know.
593
00:34:59,461 --> 00:35:03,020
So let's try and make this
the best Christmas yet, eh?
594
00:35:03,023 --> 00:35:04,822
OK?
595
00:35:04,824 --> 00:35:08,344
OK. Right.
596
00:35:16,311 --> 00:35:19,510
Prepare to be knighted
with my special sword.
597
00:35:19,513 --> 00:35:21,633
Oh, yes, Your Highness.
598
00:35:30,000 --> 00:35:32,559
Merry Christmas, everyone!
599
00:35:32,561 --> 00:35:35,560
Or as we say in Wales, nadolig
llawen pawb.
600
00:35:35,563 --> 00:35:38,442
What does that mean?
Merry Christmas, everyone.
601
00:35:38,445 --> 00:35:40,124
Oh, lovely. What is it again?
602
00:35:40,126 --> 00:35:42,245
Nadolig llawen. Nadorig claren.
603
00:35:42,247 --> 00:35:43,846
Funny that, cos I use Clarins.
604
00:35:43,848 --> 00:35:45,567
Happy Christmas, everyone.
605
00:35:45,569 --> 00:35:49,368
There he is.
Happy Christmas, my little prince.
606
00:35:49,372 --> 00:35:51,732
Do you want a Bucks Fizz?
Yeah, go on.
607
00:35:55,456 --> 00:35:57,735
I'm sorry about last night.
It's all right.
608
00:35:57,737 --> 00:36:00,096
No, I shouldn't have reacted
like that.
609
00:36:00,098 --> 00:36:03,257
You're doing what's best
for you and Stacey. Thanks, Mum.
610
00:36:03,260 --> 00:36:05,259
I will miss you though.
611
00:36:05,262 --> 00:36:07,381
Come here.
612
00:36:07,383 --> 00:36:09,702
Happy Christmas.
613
00:36:09,704 --> 00:36:11,583
Where is Stacey. She not up yet?
614
00:36:11,585 --> 00:36:15,384
No, she's having a shower.
I thought Nessa was having a shower.
615
00:36:15,388 --> 00:36:19,587
I tell you, that's one thing I'll
miss is this shower. It's so lush.
616
00:36:19,590 --> 00:36:21,949
Yeah, you said.
617
00:36:21,952 --> 00:36:26,431
You never shower, do you, Ness?
I know. I physically can't do it.
618
00:36:26,435 --> 00:36:30,874
And I won't lie to you, it's gonna
be a problem for me, moving in that caravan with Dave.
619
00:36:30,877 --> 00:36:33,316
He's not got a tub.
How will you manage?
620
00:36:33,319 --> 00:36:37,278
I'll have a personal wash
twice a day. With a flannel.
621
00:36:37,281 --> 00:36:41,640
Oh, thanks, Ness. Are you OK about
moving in with him?
622
00:36:41,644 --> 00:36:43,803
Yeah. He's good as gold, he is.
623
00:36:43,805 --> 00:36:45,924
He can't do enough for me, or Neil.
624
00:36:45,927 --> 00:36:49,166
NEIL CRIES
625
00:36:49,169 --> 00:36:53,408
Oh, Neil. I'm in the bath.
626
00:36:53,411 --> 00:36:56,130
I'll get Dave. You remember Dave?
627
00:36:56,133 --> 00:36:58,292
Dave Coaches.
628
00:36:58,294 --> 00:37:00,733
With the moustache?
629
00:37:00,736 --> 00:37:03,095
Yeah, that's him, babes.
630
00:37:03,097 --> 00:37:05,017
Oh, Dave!
631
00:37:06,539 --> 00:37:10,018
Dave! Help me out, Stace.
632
00:37:10,021 --> 00:37:13,100
BOTH: Dave! What?
633
00:37:13,103 --> 00:37:16,462
Neil's crying.
Give him a hand, will you?
634
00:37:16,465 --> 00:37:20,185
Be there now. He's on his way.
635
00:37:23,190 --> 00:37:29,470
Oh, Stace. Will you do my back?
Yeah. The razor's by the sink.
636
00:37:30,634 --> 00:37:32,353
Mick! Michael!
637
00:37:32,355 --> 00:37:34,874
Noel's given the little boy a bike.
638
00:37:34,877 --> 00:37:39,396
Cos his sister was being bullied
cos she's in a wheelchair and he stuck up for her.
639
00:37:39,399 --> 00:37:41,238
I've gone. I've actually gone.
640
00:37:41,241 --> 00:37:44,040
Every year he gets me.
641
00:37:44,042 --> 00:37:47,361
Oh, my Christ! What on earth?!
642
00:37:47,364 --> 00:37:49,683
Edna...
643
00:37:49,686 --> 00:37:51,805
Are you all right?
Don't touch her, Gwen.
644
00:37:51,807 --> 00:37:53,886
Stay well back.
But she's only a... No.
645
00:37:53,888 --> 00:37:55,807
You don't know what state she's in.
646
00:37:55,810 --> 00:37:58,410
She's bitten Dawn before now.
647
00:38:00,012 --> 00:38:02,731
Mick! Michael!
648
00:38:02,734 --> 00:38:04,373
Can you come in here, please?
649
00:38:04,375 --> 00:38:07,934
What's going on? Edna!
650
00:38:07,937 --> 00:38:11,936
How did she get there? She just
popped up from behind the bar.
651
00:38:11,940 --> 00:38:13,739
She's been here all night,
bless her.
652
00:38:13,741 --> 00:38:15,500
Blimey. We'll have to get her home.
653
00:38:15,502 --> 00:38:21,301
Right, everyone, could
we please stop talking about her as though she's not in the room?
654
00:38:21,305 --> 00:38:25,104
Mick, what's Dawn and Pete's surname?
Sutcliffe.
655
00:38:25,108 --> 00:38:27,028
Right.
656
00:38:28,830 --> 00:38:30,149
Mrs Sutcliffe.
657
00:38:30,151 --> 00:38:32,230
Hello. I'm Bryn.
658
00:38:32,232 --> 00:38:37,031
It's Christmas 2008.
Gordon Brown is the Prime Minister.
659
00:38:37,035 --> 00:38:40,794
Bryn, she's just woken up. She's not
been in a coma. What we gonna do?
660
00:38:40,797 --> 00:38:43,956
Well, someone's gonna have
to take her back. I can't do it.
661
00:38:43,959 --> 00:38:46,078
I can't leave the turkey.
662
00:38:46,081 --> 00:38:49,120
All right. Well, I'll take her then.
663
00:38:49,122 --> 00:38:52,362
Should I come with you?
No, it's all right. It's not far.
664
00:38:53,965 --> 00:38:55,524
That's it. Watch yourself.
665
00:38:55,526 --> 00:38:57,326
Come on. That's it.
666
00:38:59,529 --> 00:39:03,568
Your Pete'll be worried sick. All
right, Edna. Where'd you spring from?
667
00:39:03,571 --> 00:39:08,770
She's been behind the bloody bar
all night, hasn't she? There you go.
668
00:39:08,774 --> 00:39:13,853
♪ ..But the fire is so delightful
Since we've no place to go... ♪ Oh.
669
00:39:13,858 --> 00:39:15,657
Where to you going?
670
00:39:15,659 --> 00:39:19,018
Gonna take him round the block. See
if I can get him off before lunch.
671
00:39:19,021 --> 00:39:20,700
Cracking. You coming? No.
672
00:39:20,702 --> 00:39:23,861
Dave's taking you a walk.
673
00:39:23,864 --> 00:39:27,263
I explained to you what a walk
was, didn't I? That's right.
674
00:39:27,266 --> 00:39:29,785
Hiya! Happy Christmas, Dave.
675
00:39:29,787 --> 00:39:32,266
Happy Christmas, Stace.
676
00:39:32,269 --> 00:39:35,548
Oh. Oh. Merry Christmas.
677
00:39:35,551 --> 00:39:37,591
Merry Christmas, Dave.
678
00:39:43,516 --> 00:39:46,515
Mick,
do you need a hand with anything?
679
00:39:46,518 --> 00:39:48,277
No, no, all under control.
680
00:39:48,279 --> 00:39:50,798
OK, well, I'm gonna put
all the presents out now -
681
00:39:50,800 --> 00:39:52,719
into piles. So where are all yours?
682
00:39:52,722 --> 00:39:55,161
I don't know, darlin'.
Happy Christmas, Ness.
683
00:39:55,163 --> 00:39:57,362
Ask Pam when she comes back.
684
00:39:57,364 --> 00:40:00,083
She's taken Edna home.
She fell asleep behind the bar.
685
00:40:00,086 --> 00:40:02,445
Oh, my God.
You look beautiful in that, babe.
686
00:40:02,447 --> 00:40:05,046
Aww, thanks.
It's my Christmas dress.
687
00:40:05,049 --> 00:40:06,848
Sure I can't do anything to help?
688
00:40:06,850 --> 00:40:08,889
No, no, all under control.
689
00:40:08,891 --> 00:40:12,490
Well, that was a turn up
for the books. Poor old Edna!
690
00:40:12,494 --> 00:40:14,973
I thought you handled
her really well, Bryn.
691
00:40:14,975 --> 00:40:16,574
I know!
692
00:40:16,576 --> 00:40:21,735
I don't know what came over me.
I think I was inspired by Noel.
693
00:40:21,739 --> 00:40:25,778
I looked at her and I thought,
what would Noel do?
694
00:40:25,782 --> 00:40:30,981
And that is why, for me,
Noel Edmonds is one of the country's finest talents. Yeah, he is.
695
00:40:30,985 --> 00:40:33,824
Deal Or No Deal. Have
you seen it, Mick? Yeah, a couple.
696
00:40:33,827 --> 00:40:39,026
It's just a load of people trying
to guess what's in a box, in't it? Hand us those tongs, will you, mate.
697
00:40:39,030 --> 00:40:43,389
No, it's not. There's a lot more to
it that that. Have you seen it, Jase?
698
00:40:43,393 --> 00:40:46,352
I've not seen this one but
there's a version in Spain.
699
00:40:46,354 --> 00:40:49,233
It's called Un Trato O No Trato.
What does that mean?
700
00:40:49,236 --> 00:40:50,835
Deal Or No Deal.
701
00:40:50,837 --> 00:40:53,596
Deal Or No Deal, that's what
we call it. You're right, Mick.
702
00:40:53,599 --> 00:40:57,398
the show without Noel,
would be utter horse shit!
703
00:40:57,401 --> 00:41:00,240
But with him in the equation,
it's a whole different thing.
704
00:41:00,243 --> 00:41:05,642
I think they should call it
Deal Or Noel's Deal!
705
00:41:05,646 --> 00:41:10,125
Gwen! Deal Or Noel's Deal!
706
00:41:10,129 --> 00:41:12,208
Mick. Is there anything
I can do to help?
707
00:41:12,210 --> 00:41:14,649
No, no. All under control.
708
00:41:14,652 --> 00:41:17,411
It's all right, Gwen.
I'll put them in the dishwasher.
709
00:41:17,414 --> 00:41:20,133
No, no, I've got it.
You've been a while, Ness.
710
00:41:20,135 --> 00:41:23,014
I know. I was havin' my cigar.
711
00:41:23,017 --> 00:41:25,696
Cigar? Yes.
She always has one on Christmas.
712
00:41:25,699 --> 00:41:29,538
Cuban. I smokes a Cuban at Christmas
and a pipe at Easter.
713
00:41:29,541 --> 00:41:31,780
Always has, always will.
DOORBELL RINGS
714
00:41:31,782 --> 00:41:33,542
I'll get it.
715
00:41:37,106 --> 00:41:40,465
All right? Merry Christmas.
716
00:41:40,468 --> 00:41:42,908
Yeah. Happy Christmas.
717
00:41:43,950 --> 00:41:47,309
Where's Neil?
Dave's taken him a walk. What?
718
00:41:47,312 --> 00:41:52,711
But I was hoping... Look, we've
been through this before, I can't be running stuff by you all the time.
719
00:41:52,715 --> 00:41:57,154
I can't be ringing you every
time he needs his nappy changed or Dave takes him down the pub.
720
00:41:57,158 --> 00:41:59,517
Down the pub?
721
00:41:59,520 --> 00:42:01,479
Dave takes him down the pub?!
722
00:42:01,481 --> 00:42:05,920
Yeah. I wanted to be the first
person to take him down the pub!
723
00:42:05,923 --> 00:42:08,642
Happy Christmas, Smithy, darlin.
724
00:42:08,645 --> 00:42:12,964
Happy Christmas, Pamela,
glad tidings to you and your kin, obviously.
725
00:42:12,968 --> 00:42:15,047
How's everything with Edna?
726
00:42:15,049 --> 00:42:17,048
Yeah, what's occurrin'? She's fine.
727
00:42:17,050 --> 00:42:19,929
They didn't know she was gone,
thought she was still asleep!
728
00:42:19,932 --> 00:42:23,372
They were half way
through their dinner.
729
00:42:35,101 --> 00:42:37,261
You all right? Don't touch me. OK?
730
00:42:40,545 --> 00:42:42,264
I've thought it through
731
00:42:42,266 --> 00:42:45,386
and I am willing to accept it
but there are some conditions.
732
00:42:46,949 --> 00:42:50,668
Go on. Firstly, you come back every
other weekend, without fail. Right.
733
00:42:50,671 --> 00:42:56,030
Secondly, you guarantee at least
one night out every month with all the boys. We don't even do that now!
734
00:42:56,034 --> 00:43:00,633
Thirdly, if you promise it'll
be no more than six months, you've got a deal.
735
00:43:00,637 --> 00:43:04,116
Any longer than that, I am gonna
start looking for a new best friend.
736
00:43:04,119 --> 00:43:07,638
Who?! I don't know. Likely candidates
are Deano or Budgie.
737
00:43:07,641 --> 00:43:10,360
What about Fingers?
738
00:43:10,363 --> 00:43:12,762
Hmm, that's a thought.
739
00:43:12,765 --> 00:43:15,524
I'll stick him
on the bench with Chinese Alan.
740
00:43:15,526 --> 00:43:17,086
Merry Christmas, mate.
741
00:43:17,527 --> 00:43:18,966
Yeah, whatever.
742
00:43:18,968 --> 00:43:20,527
Mick, where's this turkey?
743
00:43:20,529 --> 00:43:22,889
I'm absolutely fam-ISHed!
744
00:43:25,132 --> 00:43:28,251
HUM OF CONVERSATION
745
00:43:28,254 --> 00:43:30,293
I'm sorry we're not
in the dining room.
746
00:43:30,295 --> 00:43:32,214
There wasn't enough room
with all of us.
747
00:43:32,217 --> 00:43:33,896
We'd never get you
all in our house.
748
00:43:33,898 --> 00:43:36,537
To tell you the truth,
we're thinking about an extension.
749
00:43:36,539 --> 00:43:38,138
Is he all right? Everything OK?
750
00:43:38,140 --> 00:43:40,979
Yeah. I had to read
to him to get him off.
751
00:43:40,982 --> 00:43:43,101
Oh, a little fairy story?
752
00:43:43,103 --> 00:43:46,702
No. Russell Brand's My Booky Wook.
He's loving every word.
753
00:43:46,705 --> 00:43:49,584
Did we get a mention in the end? No.
754
00:43:49,587 --> 00:43:52,106
Aw, that's a shame, I'm quite
disappointed, are you?
755
00:43:52,109 --> 00:43:53,668
Don't be, Stace.
756
00:43:53,670 --> 00:43:55,750
We had a cracking night,
Pam, all three of us.
757
00:43:57,752 --> 00:44:00,671
Mick, this turkey is immense. I know.
758
00:44:00,674 --> 00:44:03,553
It's got what I call the wow factor.
759
00:44:03,556 --> 00:44:05,555
Dad, it's definitely the
best one yet.
760
00:44:05,557 --> 00:44:08,276
My God, it doesn't even taste
like turkey. It's like salmon.
761
00:44:08,279 --> 00:44:09,878
Out of this world!
762
00:44:09,880 --> 00:44:12,119
Fair play, Mick!
It's not just the turkey.
763
00:44:12,121 --> 00:44:14,400
These carrots, Michael,
are an Arc de Triumph.
764
00:44:14,402 --> 00:44:16,241
Sure? Everybody happy?
765
00:44:16,244 --> 00:44:17,604
CHEERS OF APPROVAL
766
00:44:18,405 --> 00:44:21,604
So Smithy, how come you're not
eating with your family today?
767
00:44:21,607 --> 00:44:25,126
I already did. We sit down
about eleven, half eleven.
768
00:44:25,129 --> 00:44:27,888
What, a full turkey dinner?
Yeah, the whole shebang.
769
00:44:27,891 --> 00:44:30,130
It's just I got to get around
here, ain't I?
770
00:44:30,132 --> 00:44:32,011
I used to have three
when I was with Lucy.
771
00:44:32,013 --> 00:44:35,372
I'd eat at home, then come here,
get to Lucy's for about four, then
772
00:44:35,375 --> 00:44:38,134
down the Crown, get on it, then
back here for about ten.
773
00:44:38,137 --> 00:44:40,216
And then just stay here
till New Year's Day.
774
00:44:40,218 --> 00:44:42,057
Oh, that's nice!
775
00:44:42,059 --> 00:44:48,098
Right. Has nobody actually noticed
that I am eating meat?
776
00:44:48,103 --> 00:44:50,302
I'm a vegetarian, remember?
777
00:44:50,305 --> 00:44:52,744
Give it a rest, Pam! What?
778
00:44:52,746 --> 00:44:56,185
Oh, Mum, come on. Everyone knows
you weren't really a vegetarian.
779
00:44:56,188 --> 00:44:57,747
Really?
780
00:44:57,749 --> 00:45:00,628
Well, you did a good job
of hiding it!
781
00:45:00,631 --> 00:45:02,190
Yeah, better job than you did.
782
00:45:02,192 --> 00:45:03,751
LAUGHTER
783
00:45:03,753 --> 00:45:08,592
Well, I didn't know. I've bought you
a vegetarian cook book for Christmas.
784
00:45:08,596 --> 00:45:11,475
You got mugged off, Gwen.
785
00:45:11,478 --> 00:45:14,197
Right, right. Here's a good one.
786
00:45:14,199 --> 00:45:18,438
What is yellow and dangerous?
787
00:45:18,442 --> 00:45:22,602
Shark infested custard.
Infested custard! Yes, yes!
788
00:45:25,646 --> 00:45:29,165
Right, I've put all your presents
out, you've got your own places.
789
00:45:29,168 --> 00:45:31,087
Right, Mick, you're there.
790
00:45:31,090 --> 00:45:36,209
Pam, come on Pam, you're next to
him. Mum, Gav, you're next to Mum.
791
00:45:36,213 --> 00:45:38,252
Then Smithy, you're on the corner.
792
00:45:38,254 --> 00:45:40,733
Uncle Bryn, Dave, then Jason.
793
00:45:40,736 --> 00:45:42,855
Mine are over there so
I'll just be floating. OK.
794
00:45:42,857 --> 00:45:46,936
I'm gonna open one first
because, well, cos I just want to.
795
00:45:46,939 --> 00:45:49,058
Unless you think this
makes me look spoilt.
796
00:45:49,061 --> 00:45:51,741
No... Go on.
797
00:45:52,823 --> 00:45:57,382
Smith, I'm not being funny but
probably best if you leave him for now.
798
00:45:57,386 --> 00:46:01,145
It's just I've not had much
time with him today, that's all.
799
00:46:01,148 --> 00:46:03,427
He's got a routine,
and if you get him excited,
800
00:46:03,430 --> 00:46:06,709
it's us that'll get it in the
neck when he won't go down tonight.
801
00:46:06,712 --> 00:46:08,911
OK.
802
00:46:08,913 --> 00:46:10,833
Ah, thanks babe.
803
00:46:14,596 --> 00:46:18,755
It's from Gav,
but it's not my main present.
804
00:46:18,759 --> 00:46:23,918
There isn't any main present,
cos we decided, it's just lots of little ones.
805
00:46:23,922 --> 00:46:27,761
Yeah, but it's not my main little
one. Right, Mum, you're next.
806
00:46:27,765 --> 00:46:31,325
OK. Well, this is from Doris.
807
00:46:33,608 --> 00:46:35,567
And it's talc.
808
00:46:35,569 --> 00:46:39,448
What is this thing with
talc and old people? I mean, do you actually use it?
809
00:46:39,452 --> 00:46:42,171
I don't, Pam, but it's nice
to have some in the cupboard.
810
00:46:42,173 --> 00:46:43,853
Uncle Bryn?
811
00:46:45,535 --> 00:46:52,894
This is from Nessa, David
and Neil!
812
00:46:52,900 --> 00:46:56,820
Actually Bryn, we've got you
all the same, so you may as well open them together.
813
00:47:04,787 --> 00:47:07,746
It's the Snickers from
a box of Celebrations.
814
00:47:07,749 --> 00:47:09,348
Oh, you got the Snickers did you,
Gav?
815
00:47:09,350 --> 00:47:10,869
Crackin. Stace, what you get?
816
00:47:10,871 --> 00:47:12,230
Milky Way.
817
00:47:12,232 --> 00:47:15,031
I've got a Milky Way. Mars.
818
00:47:15,034 --> 00:47:17,234
Gwen? Bounty.
819
00:47:19,116 --> 00:47:22,235
You've drawn the short straw
there, I'm not gonna lie to you.
820
00:47:22,238 --> 00:47:24,237
I'll see if I got some
more on the bus. Jase?
821
00:47:24,239 --> 00:47:26,798
Malteser. Oh, that's the big one.
822
00:47:26,801 --> 00:47:28,360
That's the best one, that is.
823
00:47:28,362 --> 00:47:29,761
That or the Galaxy truffle!
824
00:47:29,763 --> 00:47:31,042
I got the Galaxy truffle!
825
00:47:31,043 --> 00:47:33,562
I got the Galaxy truffle!
826
00:47:33,565 --> 00:47:37,044
Smith?
Just the regular Galaxy one. Cheers.
827
00:47:37,047 --> 00:47:39,966
Thanks, Ness. Thanks, David.
828
00:47:39,969 --> 00:47:42,168
Just a little something
from the three of us.
829
00:47:42,170 --> 00:47:44,849
And this is from me.
830
00:47:44,852 --> 00:47:46,772
Aw, thanks babe.
831
00:47:51,256 --> 00:47:54,215
Babe! That's amazing! What is it?
832
00:47:54,218 --> 00:47:56,377
It's a signed photo
of Michael Dawson.
833
00:47:56,379 --> 00:47:59,019
He's my favourite Tottenham player.
Dawsy.
834
00:48:02,783 --> 00:48:05,902
Right, I don't know
if it's my go next,
835
00:48:05,905 --> 00:48:07,864
I just really want to
give him his present.
836
00:48:07,866 --> 00:48:10,466
So...if you wanna open it. OK.
837
00:48:22,835 --> 00:48:25,035
And look at the back. Wey!
838
00:48:27,678 --> 00:48:31,797
He's a lucky boy. I've already got
him a Cardiff City one, haven't I?
839
00:48:31,801 --> 00:48:36,080
What? Yeah, but he can support
two teams, can't he? No he can't.
840
00:48:36,083 --> 00:48:38,562
Why...why d'you get him that top?
841
00:48:38,565 --> 00:48:41,644
Well, cos he's a Cardiff
boy, isn't he? Well, Barry.
842
00:48:41,647 --> 00:48:43,406
Yeah, well,
843
00:48:43,408 --> 00:48:45,847
they're his closest team
844
00:48:45,849 --> 00:48:49,049
and they're my team, so...
845
00:48:54,775 --> 00:48:57,454
Right, well I wanna give
Mick his present.
846
00:48:57,457 --> 00:48:59,856
Stace, would you help
me bring it in?
847
00:48:59,858 --> 00:49:02,178
OK. Bring it in?
Blimey, what you got me?
848
00:49:15,828 --> 00:49:18,147
What time's the EastEnders special?
849
00:49:18,149 --> 00:49:20,908
I don't know, we stopped
watching it, didn't we, Bryn?
850
00:49:20,911 --> 00:49:22,790
We did. I used to love it!
851
00:49:22,792 --> 00:49:26,951
But when they brought Dirty Den back
that was the final straw for me.
852
00:49:26,955 --> 00:49:29,314
I mean no-one
could've survived that canal.
853
00:49:29,316 --> 00:49:32,755
Specially with a bullet wound. They
were taking the mick, Mick.
854
00:49:32,758 --> 00:49:35,837
I think it went downhill
when Pete died. Pete Beale?
855
00:49:35,840 --> 00:49:38,559
Yeah. And Mark. With the Aids.
856
00:49:38,562 --> 00:49:40,201
What about Cath, is she dead?
857
00:49:40,203 --> 00:49:43,042
She died on Strictly.
858
00:49:43,045 --> 00:49:44,805
Out first, wasn't she?
859
00:49:46,367 --> 00:49:49,206
Actually she's not dead, Smithy.
860
00:49:49,208 --> 00:49:50,967
She's living in South Africa
861
00:49:50,970 --> 00:49:53,929
where she went to get over the rape
by...um...
862
00:49:53,931 --> 00:49:55,131
What was his name?
863
00:49:55,732 --> 00:49:57,211
Wilmott Brown.
864
00:49:57,213 --> 00:49:58,572
That's the fella.
865
00:49:58,574 --> 00:50:00,253
I tell you who I miss.
866
00:50:00,255 --> 00:50:02,374
Mike Reid. Frank Butcher.
867
00:50:02,377 --> 00:50:05,656
Pat, Pat, Pat...
868
00:50:05,659 --> 00:50:07,339
I'M TRYING TO SORT IT OUT, PAT.
869
00:50:10,021 --> 00:50:11,381
That's Ted Rogers!
870
00:50:13,383 --> 00:50:14,902
You're thinking of Dusty Bin.
871
00:50:14,904 --> 00:50:17,783
What you got there, Pat?
872
00:50:17,786 --> 00:50:19,746
Pat, Pat, Pat, Pat, Pat!
873
00:50:21,268 --> 00:50:24,388
Bloody hell. What is it?
874
00:50:26,511 --> 00:50:28,670
A keyboard? Yes!
875
00:50:28,673 --> 00:50:31,272
Pam, that's fantastic!
876
00:50:31,274 --> 00:50:33,273
Do you play, Mick?
You know, not really.
877
00:50:33,276 --> 00:50:35,235
Oh, he does! Don't listen to him!
878
00:50:35,237 --> 00:50:38,517
But not for years, Pam.
Ah, come here!
879
00:50:40,200 --> 00:50:42,239
You like it? I love it.
880
00:50:42,241 --> 00:50:43,800
You never lose it, Mick.
881
00:50:43,802 --> 00:50:45,961
I hadn't picked up a
trumpet in 17 years.
882
00:50:45,963 --> 00:50:49,602
Jools Holland and the Big
Band were in town one night, they fancied a jam.
883
00:50:49,606 --> 00:50:52,765
Before I know it I'm up there playing
Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy.
884
00:50:52,768 --> 00:50:53,847
That was a crackin' night.
885
00:50:53,848 --> 00:50:54,887
Play something now, Dad!
886
00:50:54,889 --> 00:50:58,248
I can't, I've got to set it all up.
887
00:50:58,251 --> 00:51:00,170
Do you know Two Become
One by the Spice Girls.
888
00:51:00,172 --> 00:51:04,411
Look, just give me a minute to
work it all out, all right? Who's the next present?
889
00:51:04,415 --> 00:51:08,614
Right, well I got something I
wanna give to Nessa.
890
00:51:08,617 --> 00:51:10,376
I thought we weren't doing presents.
891
00:51:10,378 --> 00:51:12,658
Yeah, well, I just thought
I'd get you something.
892
00:51:18,383 --> 00:51:19,862
Cracking. Cheers, Dave.
893
00:51:19,864 --> 00:51:21,184
Look inside.
894
00:51:26,828 --> 00:51:30,067
Ness. I'm in love with you, I am.
895
00:51:30,070 --> 00:51:33,430
And I want you to be my wife.
896
00:51:38,516 --> 00:51:41,996
So whaddya say, Sugar Tits?
897
00:51:44,439 --> 00:51:47,278
Yeah. Fair do's. I will.
898
00:51:47,281 --> 00:51:49,001
Cracking.
899
00:51:52,364 --> 00:51:56,764
Oh my God, Ness! Congratulations.
900
00:52:09,054 --> 00:52:10,413
Oh, leave those, Gwen!
901
00:52:10,415 --> 00:52:12,494
That's why we've got a dishwasher.
902
00:52:12,497 --> 00:52:15,377
It's called Mick. It's all right
Pam, once it's done, it's done!
903
00:52:17,259 --> 00:52:18,938
I tell you what, Gwen.
904
00:52:18,941 --> 00:52:22,540
That turkey has taken over my
life the last couple of days.
905
00:52:22,543 --> 00:52:25,422
We've been soaking it,
basting it, and then resting it.
906
00:52:25,425 --> 00:52:27,904
And them leftovers,
we'll be chowdering them.
907
00:52:27,906 --> 00:52:30,705
It's a wonder he hasn't had
the bloody thing in bed with us!
908
00:52:30,708 --> 00:52:32,747
Well, it's the best
turkey we've ever tasted.
909
00:52:32,749 --> 00:52:35,428
Isn't that right, Jase?
I should say so.
910
00:52:35,431 --> 00:52:38,470
But then again, Dad used to make
us have pork chops on Christmas,
911
00:52:38,473 --> 00:52:40,312
so there's not much competition.
912
00:52:40,314 --> 00:52:42,953
I tell you what I'm partial to,
turkey omelette.
913
00:52:42,955 --> 00:52:47,314
Oh, right. Where's Bryn? Is he all
right? Yeah.
914
00:52:47,318 --> 00:52:48,877
He's having a little nap, he is.
915
00:52:48,879 --> 00:52:51,838
It's been a long day for him,
what with all the presents an' that.
916
00:52:51,841 --> 00:52:53,400
Oh, he loved yours, didn't he?
917
00:52:53,402 --> 00:52:57,521
What d'you get him again?
Sex And The City. DVD of the film.
918
00:52:57,524 --> 00:53:01,803
Thing is, I knew he'd like it
cos when it was out in the cinema, he watched it four times.
919
00:53:01,807 --> 00:53:03,406
Twice in one day. Really?
920
00:53:03,408 --> 00:53:06,007
He loves the character Big, he does.
And all the hats.
921
00:53:06,009 --> 00:53:09,808
The DVD extras on this
are out of this world.
922
00:53:09,812 --> 00:53:12,531
Bryn, we thought
you were having a snooze.
923
00:53:12,533 --> 00:53:16,852
I was, but you've got a DVD player
in that room and I couldn't resist.
924
00:53:16,856 --> 00:53:20,735
I tell you what,
they had a ball making this film.
925
00:53:20,739 --> 00:53:22,858
Kim Cattrell is an absolute hoot.
926
00:53:22,860 --> 00:53:24,459
And she's over 50, Pam.
927
00:53:24,461 --> 00:53:27,700
Oh, my god, this is so immense.
You're getting married, Ness!
928
00:53:27,703 --> 00:53:29,822
To Dave Coaches! I know.
929
00:53:29,824 --> 00:53:33,503
Is Coaches his surname?
Will you be Nessa Coaches? No.
930
00:53:33,506 --> 00:53:36,585
Anyone seen Smithy? Yeah,
he's out the back having a fag.
931
00:53:36,588 --> 00:53:39,307
Where are you gonna do it?
Where are you gonna get married?
932
00:53:39,310 --> 00:53:41,430
I should imagine in the mosque.
933
00:53:41,511 --> 00:53:44,630
Right,
who's up for some board games?
934
00:53:44,633 --> 00:53:46,153
Oh, yeah! Yeah!
935
00:53:51,197 --> 00:53:53,356
You all right, mate?
936
00:53:53,359 --> 00:53:55,318
Yeah.
937
00:53:55,320 --> 00:53:57,719
You sure?
938
00:53:57,721 --> 00:54:01,001
Yeah. It's just been a bit of
a shit Christmas, that's all.
939
00:54:02,524 --> 00:54:07,524
You're moving down there, my son's
getting a new dad, they're all happy families.
940
00:54:09,048 --> 00:54:12,127
I just don't know what
I'm doing with myself.
941
00:54:12,130 --> 00:54:14,050
I know.
942
00:54:19,455 --> 00:54:20,495
Do you have to go?
943
00:54:22,777 --> 00:54:24,696
I mean, do you WANT to?
944
00:54:24,698 --> 00:54:26,697
Or are you just doing it for Stacey?
945
00:54:26,699 --> 00:54:29,898
I'm doing it for my marriage,
946
00:54:29,901 --> 00:54:32,180
for my wife.
947
00:54:32,182 --> 00:54:33,822
I have to put that first, Smith.
948
00:54:37,065 --> 00:54:39,504
But it just feels like
it's all changed so quickly.
949
00:54:39,507 --> 00:54:41,027
And it's still changing.
950
00:54:42,749 --> 00:54:44,748
I just feel a bit on my own, really.
951
00:54:44,750 --> 00:54:47,869
Oh, mate... I'll be all right.
952
00:54:47,872 --> 00:54:49,391
I wanna play Battleships.
953
00:54:49,393 --> 00:54:51,553
D'you fancy a game?
Yeah, I'll be in now.
954
00:54:58,279 --> 00:55:03,239
Look, I don't want you thinking I'm
going down there and everything's fine, cos I'm terrified.
955
00:55:04,642 --> 00:55:08,722
Not because I'm leaving Mum and Dad
or even that I'm moving to a new place.
956
00:55:10,966 --> 00:55:13,406
I'm terrified cos I
won't have you around.
957
00:55:15,529 --> 00:55:17,049
I know.
958
00:55:26,296 --> 00:55:27,615
Coming in?
959
00:55:27,617 --> 00:55:28,657
In a bit.
960
00:55:50,751 --> 00:55:53,391
Does he have a moustache?
961
00:55:54,593 --> 00:55:56,073
No.
962
00:56:00,677 --> 00:56:04,116
Does she have glasses?
963
00:56:04,119 --> 00:56:06,759
No.
964
00:56:08,362 --> 00:56:11,681
Is he bald? Yes.
965
00:56:11,684 --> 00:56:13,803
Ha, ha, ha!
966
00:56:13,805 --> 00:56:16,405
I've got a hunch I
know who he is, Jase!
967
00:56:17,487 --> 00:56:20,446
Mum, I can't stop eating.
Are you doing any ham or anything?
968
00:56:20,449 --> 00:56:23,088
Yeah, I'll do something in
a minute if anyone wants it.
969
00:56:23,091 --> 00:56:24,770
Back three.
970
00:56:24,772 --> 00:56:27,291
Yes! Nice one, Mum.
971
00:56:27,293 --> 00:56:30,692
D14. Hit. D15.
972
00:56:30,695 --> 00:56:32,294
Hit.
973
00:56:32,296 --> 00:56:35,135
Y11. Hit! Oh, this is ridiculous.
974
00:56:35,138 --> 00:56:38,257
You're hitting my boats on every go.
Have you looked at my board?
975
00:56:38,260 --> 00:56:39,939
No. I looked in your eyes.
976
00:56:39,941 --> 00:56:42,380
I can read you like a book, Stace.
977
00:56:42,383 --> 00:56:44,182
E12. Aw, Ness.
978
00:56:44,184 --> 00:56:45,823
Here we go!
979
00:56:45,825 --> 00:56:48,464
Oh. Let's sing something.
Let's have a sing-song!
980
00:56:48,466 --> 00:56:52,786
Well, hang on, I'm trying
to think of something I know all the way through.
981
00:56:54,070 --> 00:56:55,869
What about this one?
982
00:56:55,871 --> 00:57:00,190
Oh, I love this one!
983
00:57:00,194 --> 00:57:02,753
I know you do. Oh, Gwen.
984
00:57:02,755 --> 00:57:05,554
You take Neil, the baby,
I'm going for a smoke.
985
00:57:05,557 --> 00:57:11,436
♪ Have yourself a
merry little Christmas
986
00:57:11,440 --> 00:57:16,519
♪ Let your heart be light
987
00:57:16,524 --> 00:57:22,444
♪ From now on our troubles
will be out of sight... ♪
988
00:57:29,932 --> 00:57:31,292
Alright? Yeah.
989
00:57:32,694 --> 00:57:34,173
You?
990
00:57:34,174 --> 00:57:35,534
Yeah.
991
00:57:41,259 --> 00:57:43,818
It's been a good day, hasn't...
Don't marry him.
992
00:57:43,820 --> 00:57:45,099
What?
993
00:57:45,101 --> 00:57:47,580
Don't marry him.
994
00:57:47,583 --> 00:57:51,662
I'm not saying marry me, I don't
think that's what I'm saying,
995
00:57:51,665 --> 00:57:54,025
I'm just saying don't marry him.
996
00:57:55,708 --> 00:58:00,388
I don't think that you should marry
him.
997
00:58:07,315 --> 00:58:08,355
I'm going back in.
998
00:58:19,442 --> 00:58:24,641
♪ Faithful friends
who are dear to us
999
00:58:24,645 --> 00:58:29,685
♪ Gather near to us once more... ♪
1000
00:58:31,410 --> 00:58:33,569
I think you're gonna like
living in Barry.
1001
00:58:33,571 --> 00:58:34,610
I know.
1002
00:58:34,612 --> 00:58:36,691
You sounded like Nessa then.
1003
00:58:36,693 --> 00:58:40,653
IN WELSH ACCENT: I've been practising
the accent, if truth be told.
1004
00:58:44,938 --> 00:58:51,858
♪ Hang a shining star upon
the highest bow
1005
00:58:55,544 --> 00:58:59,503
♪ And have yourself
1006
00:58:59,507 --> 00:59:06,267
♪ A merry little Christmas now. ♪
1007
00:59:10,193 --> 00:59:11,672
CHEERING
1008
00:59:11,674 --> 00:59:12,833
Brilliant.
1009
00:59:12,835 --> 00:59:14,955
Happy Christmas, darling.
1010
00:59:17,518 --> 00:59:21,358
♪ Tell me tomorrow,
I'll wait by the window for you
1011
00:59:27,158 --> 00:59:30,678
♪ I'll wait by the big house for you
1012
00:59:34,758 --> 00:59:39,078
♪ I'll wait by the squeezebox for you
1013
00:59:42,878 --> 00:59:45,878
♪ I'll wait by your dresses for
you... ♪
1014
00:59:46,558 --> 00:59:51,638
Transcript: chocolate
Sync: boomer2
1015
00:59:51,688 --> 00:59:56,238
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
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