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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,861 --> 00:00:06,562 Who are you trying to get crazy with, ese? 2 00:00:06,598 --> 00:00:08,297 Don't you know I'm loco? 3 00:00:08,366 --> 00:00:09,565 [CYPRESS HILL'S "INSANE IN THE BRAIN" PLAYS] 4 00:00:09,668 --> 00:00:11,768 ? Insane in the membrane ? 5 00:00:11,836 --> 00:00:14,070 ? Insane in the brain ? 6 00:00:14,139 --> 00:00:15,591 ? Insane in... ? 7 00:00:15,710 --> 00:00:16,792 EDDIE: Ladies and gentlemen, 8 00:00:16,871 --> 00:00:19,826 guess whose insane brain is East Orlando High's 9 00:00:19,861 --> 00:00:23,062 newest inductee to the National Honor Society. 10 00:00:23,131 --> 00:00:24,839 Your ex-girlfriend, Alison. 11 00:00:25,169 --> 00:00:27,333 It's me. I made Honor Roll. 12 00:00:29,520 --> 00:00:31,274 I'm sorry. Am I sleeping? 13 00:00:31,353 --> 00:00:33,082 Did the beef stew put me to sleep? 14 00:00:33,173 --> 00:00:34,506 Am I at risk of drowning 15 00:00:34,575 --> 00:00:37,476 because I'm sleeping facedown in a bowl of beef stew? 16 00:00:37,578 --> 00:00:38,677 Not a dream, Ma. 17 00:00:38,712 --> 00:00:40,575 Y'all have been on me to get it together. 18 00:00:40,641 --> 00:00:42,214 Well, I've been here, waking up two minutes 19 00:00:42,316 --> 00:00:43,882 before I have to leave for school, 20 00:00:44,001 --> 00:00:46,785 crushing that A-minus/B-plus lifestyle. 21 00:00:46,853 --> 00:00:49,487 That's great, Eddie. I am so proud of you. 22 00:00:49,556 --> 00:00:50,989 Well done, Eddie. 23 00:00:51,058 --> 00:00:52,857 - [GASPS] - [GASPS] 24 00:00:54,728 --> 00:00:55,960 Whoa. 25 00:00:55,996 --> 00:00:58,496 It just goes to show how if you somewhat apply yourself 26 00:00:58,565 --> 00:01:00,365 at the last minute, anything is... 27 00:01:00,467 --> 00:01:01,587 Raaaaugh! 28 00:01:03,737 --> 00:01:04,736 Excuse me. 29 00:01:08,942 --> 00:01:10,074 It's okay. 30 00:01:10,143 --> 00:01:12,176 Luckily, I have the number to Pizza Town memorized. 31 00:01:13,079 --> 00:01:14,111 Wait. No, I don't. 32 00:01:14,180 --> 00:01:16,480 I gotta go find that magnet. 33 00:01:16,583 --> 00:01:18,883 S04E17 Let Me Go, Bro 34 00:01:18,952 --> 00:01:20,017 ? Fresh off the boat ? 35 00:01:20,119 --> 00:01:21,652 ? I'm gettin' mine everywhere I go ? 36 00:01:21,754 --> 00:01:23,888 ? If you don't know, homey, now you know ? 37 00:01:23,990 --> 00:01:25,222 ? Fresh off the boat ? 38 00:01:25,325 --> 00:01:27,391 ? Homey, you don't know where I come from ? 39 00:01:27,493 --> 00:01:28,926 ? But I know where I'm goin' ? 40 00:01:29,028 --> 00:01:30,414 ? I'm fresh off the boat ? 41 00:01:30,519 --> 00:01:32,749 sync and corrected by ninh www.addic7ed.com 42 00:01:34,067 --> 00:01:35,099 [DOOR OPENS] 43 00:01:35,201 --> 00:01:36,534 Hey, kiddo. 44 00:01:36,636 --> 00:01:38,936 Got a sec for a big-bro/little-bro tête-à-tête? 45 00:01:39,005 --> 00:01:40,905 Oh, God. Now you speak French? 46 00:01:41,007 --> 00:01:43,107 Listen, I know it must be hard for you. 47 00:01:43,209 --> 00:01:45,242 You're used to being the biggest brains in the family. 48 00:01:45,345 --> 00:01:46,377 You've got it all wrong. 49 00:01:46,479 --> 00:01:48,012 I'm happy for you. 50 00:01:48,114 --> 00:01:50,967 Buddy, I know anger-folding when I see it. 51 00:01:51,618 --> 00:01:53,884 Eddie, I am proud of you. 52 00:01:53,987 --> 00:01:55,953 But a thank-you would've been nice. 53 00:01:56,055 --> 00:01:57,288 For what? 54 00:01:57,357 --> 00:01:59,256 I'm the reason you're getting into Honor Society. 55 00:01:59,325 --> 00:02:00,625 I'm the reason you've been able 56 00:02:00,727 --> 00:02:03,555 to wake up two minutes before school every day! 57 00:02:04,162 --> 00:02:05,896 Every morning, I get up early 58 00:02:05,999 --> 00:02:09,567 to set your toothbrush and toilet seat. 59 00:02:10,547 --> 00:02:12,303 Then I sneak greens into your lunch 60 00:02:12,405 --> 00:02:14,043 for brain development. 61 00:02:14,294 --> 00:02:17,117 And I get your homework, the bus schedule, 62 00:02:17,249 --> 00:02:19,944 and exact change in quarters... In case of emergency... 63 00:02:20,046 --> 00:02:21,746 Into your backpack. 64 00:02:21,848 --> 00:02:23,481 I dreamt I was a mer-man. 65 00:02:25,574 --> 00:02:27,084 Huh. I've been using that change 66 00:02:27,153 --> 00:02:28,552 to buy sausage at 7-Eleven. 67 00:02:28,655 --> 00:02:30,655 And you never wondered how it got there? 68 00:02:30,757 --> 00:02:32,017 I thought Mom did it. 69 00:02:32,096 --> 00:02:32,990 Please. 70 00:02:33,092 --> 00:02:35,192 Mom's just trying to keep your head above water. 71 00:02:35,294 --> 00:02:37,762 I'm trying to get you to the other side of the pool. 72 00:02:37,864 --> 00:02:39,664 Since when do you care whether or not I do well? 73 00:02:39,766 --> 00:02:41,232 Since you started high school, 74 00:02:41,334 --> 00:02:43,167 which is the first year of precollege. 75 00:02:43,269 --> 00:02:45,670 I want to visit you at Stanford, not jail. 76 00:02:45,772 --> 00:02:47,905 Well, I didn't ask you to do any of this. 77 00:02:48,007 --> 00:02:49,140 I'm a grown human, 78 00:02:49,242 --> 00:02:51,509 taller than Mom and Dad. 79 00:02:51,611 --> 00:02:52,943 I can take care of myself. 80 00:02:53,012 --> 00:02:55,746 I would love to see you get by without all my help. 81 00:02:55,782 --> 00:02:57,481 Good, 'cause that's what I'll do. 82 00:02:57,717 --> 00:02:58,883 G'luck! 83 00:02:58,985 --> 00:03:00,284 Don't you mean bonne chance? 84 00:03:00,353 --> 00:03:01,619 Stop speaking French! 85 00:03:04,023 --> 00:03:05,389 Put your hands where I can see them. 86 00:03:05,491 --> 00:03:07,525 I'm taking you downtown. 87 00:03:07,627 --> 00:03:09,704 Ooh, are we doing this? 88 00:03:10,096 --> 00:03:12,646 Officer, I've been baaaaad. 89 00:03:13,132 --> 00:03:14,799 No. It's from my book. 90 00:03:14,901 --> 00:03:16,767 I just got another round of publisher notes, 91 00:03:16,869 --> 00:03:18,102 this time from Vera. 92 00:03:18,204 --> 00:03:21,038 She says my police sections lack authenticity. 93 00:03:21,840 --> 00:03:23,974 "Officer Moretti turns to Jennifer Hong. 94 00:03:24,077 --> 00:03:25,109 'Take a look, Hong. 95 00:03:25,211 --> 00:03:26,610 Those three gunshot holes 96 00:03:26,713 --> 00:03:28,946 make the head look like a bowling ball. 97 00:03:29,015 --> 00:03:32,516 But this poor son of a bitch wasn't spared." 98 00:03:32,618 --> 00:03:33,884 That's perfect, right? 99 00:03:34,746 --> 00:03:35,564 It's not great. 100 00:03:35,644 --> 00:03:36,887 I know. 101 00:03:36,956 --> 00:03:38,723 That Vera has a good eye. 102 00:03:38,825 --> 00:03:40,691 Luckily, Corporal Bryson has agreed 103 00:03:40,760 --> 00:03:42,460 to let me do a ride-along with him tomorrow 104 00:03:42,562 --> 00:03:45,629 so I can see what a real police officer does all day. 105 00:03:45,698 --> 00:03:47,031 Tomorrow is St. Patrick's Day. 106 00:03:47,100 --> 00:03:47,998 Perfect. 107 00:03:48,067 --> 00:03:49,233 The Irish love any excuse 108 00:03:49,302 --> 00:03:50,791 to break the rules. 109 00:03:51,042 --> 00:03:52,493 Look at the band U2. 110 00:03:52,546 --> 00:03:53,905 Not even spelling is safe. 111 00:03:54,063 --> 00:03:55,439 Tomorrow we're doing a special St. Patrick's Day menu 112 00:03:55,541 --> 00:03:56,540 at Cattleman's. 113 00:03:56,609 --> 00:03:59,478 Matthew Chestnut says it's a huge moneymaker. 114 00:03:59,755 --> 00:04:01,246 [CHUCKLES] I love that guy. 115 00:04:01,365 --> 00:04:03,436 He's like whiskey... Burns your throat going down, 116 00:04:03,476 --> 00:04:04,637 but then it gives you some good ideas, 117 00:04:04,689 --> 00:04:06,550 and eventually you come to depend on it. 118 00:04:06,734 --> 00:04:07,988 Okay, tell me what you think. 119 00:04:08,080 --> 00:04:09,135 Okay. 120 00:04:11,256 --> 00:04:12,288 Too much? 121 00:04:12,357 --> 00:04:13,656 If I were a cop, 122 00:04:13,725 --> 00:04:16,659 I'd arrest you for aggravated assault of the eyes. 123 00:04:16,761 --> 00:04:19,028 Okaaaaay. 124 00:04:23,268 --> 00:04:26,836 [UP-TEMPO FOLK MUSIC PLAYING] 125 00:04:26,871 --> 00:04:30,440 Kenny O'Rogers' Michael O'Bolton's Cattleman's O'Ranch. 126 00:04:30,508 --> 00:04:31,874 [BOTH LAUGH] It's perfect. 127 00:04:31,977 --> 00:04:33,042 Thanks for your help, Marvin. 128 00:04:33,144 --> 00:04:34,944 I love a drinkin' man's holiday. 129 00:04:35,046 --> 00:04:37,613 This, Father's Day, Saturday. 130 00:04:37,716 --> 00:04:39,749 Hey, hey, hey! 131 00:04:39,851 --> 00:04:41,384 [CHUCKLES] Happy St. Pat's Day, friends. 132 00:04:41,486 --> 00:04:42,285 Whoa. 133 00:04:42,354 --> 00:04:44,287 I love a bold suit. 134 00:04:44,707 --> 00:04:46,303 The green kind of washes you out, 135 00:04:46,357 --> 00:04:47,556 but who cares, huh? 136 00:04:47,592 --> 00:04:50,159 St. Pat's is a day you can do whatever you want. 137 00:04:50,228 --> 00:04:51,327 I took a taxi here. 138 00:04:51,396 --> 00:04:53,996 [LAUGHTER] 139 00:04:54,065 --> 00:04:55,831 [TELEPHONE RINGS] Top o' the morning, all! 140 00:04:55,900 --> 00:04:57,867 Let's get this sham a-rocking, shall we? 141 00:04:57,969 --> 00:04:59,735 Cattleman's O'Ranch. 142 00:05:00,158 --> 00:05:02,216 Oh, Kenny Rogers. Hello, sir. 143 00:05:02,374 --> 00:05:05,122 Louis, I have some sad news. 144 00:05:05,227 --> 00:05:06,665 What happened? Is it Dolly? 145 00:05:06,797 --> 00:05:09,620 It's Roasters. We're filing for bankruptcy. 146 00:05:09,699 --> 00:05:11,814 You'll get a chance to buy back my half 147 00:05:11,916 --> 00:05:14,554 of your restaurant for pennies on the dollar. 148 00:05:14,673 --> 00:05:16,351 Yes! [LAUGHS] 149 00:05:16,453 --> 00:05:17,963 Oh, no. 150 00:05:18,122 --> 00:05:19,321 Koo Koo Roo got ya, huh? 151 00:05:19,423 --> 00:05:20,555 Afraid so. 152 00:05:20,657 --> 00:05:22,924 Tell Matthew Chestnut he's fired for me. 153 00:05:23,411 --> 00:05:25,377 Wait. Me? Why do I have to do it? 154 00:05:25,456 --> 00:05:27,062 Because I don't want to. 155 00:05:27,131 --> 00:05:28,563 Call me when it's done. 156 00:05:28,665 --> 00:05:29,831 [LINE DISCONNECTS] 157 00:05:29,867 --> 00:05:32,767 [UP-TEMPO FOLK MUSIC PLAYING] 158 00:05:38,274 --> 00:05:40,108 Most cops wear standard-issue slacks, 159 00:05:40,176 --> 00:05:42,076 but I go with the tighter motorcycle pants 160 00:05:42,112 --> 00:05:43,478 'cause I like the range of motion. 161 00:05:43,546 --> 00:05:45,860 But in the summertime, I switch to shorts... 162 00:05:45,949 --> 00:05:47,949 Horse-cop shorts, not bike-cop shorts. 163 00:05:48,604 --> 00:05:49,917 Shouldn't you be writing this down? 164 00:05:50,019 --> 00:05:51,853 No. This is all unusable. 165 00:05:51,921 --> 00:05:54,355 I'm waiting for something exciting to happen. 166 00:05:54,424 --> 00:05:57,425 DISPATCH: All units, we've got a J-2-9-9er in progress. 167 00:05:58,685 --> 00:06:00,962 Someone at the precinct offered to go on a coffee run. 168 00:06:01,064 --> 00:06:02,230 "J" is Java. 169 00:06:02,332 --> 00:06:03,764 299 is funny 'cause a cup usually costs... 170 00:06:03,867 --> 00:06:04,799 Yes. 171 00:06:07,370 --> 00:06:08,302 Good morning. 172 00:06:08,404 --> 00:06:09,837 Emery, you look bored. 173 00:06:09,939 --> 00:06:11,672 - I'm not bored. - Yeah, you seem bored. 174 00:06:11,707 --> 00:06:12,906 Come have a seat. 175 00:06:12,975 --> 00:06:15,409 Eddie's gonna try and get himself out the door for school 176 00:06:15,511 --> 00:06:16,643 without my help. 177 00:06:16,746 --> 00:06:18,379 Look. His homework... 178 00:06:18,481 --> 00:06:19,980 - Nowhere near his backpack. - Hmm. 179 00:06:20,049 --> 00:06:22,787 The morning promises to be quite the poop show. 180 00:06:24,720 --> 00:06:27,763 He's brushing his teeth in the kitchen? 181 00:06:30,526 --> 00:06:31,625 Is he gonna spit it in the... 182 00:06:31,727 --> 00:06:32,760 [GULPS] 183 00:06:32,862 --> 00:06:35,195 Oh, my God. He swallowed it! 184 00:06:35,297 --> 00:06:36,730 Guess that counts as breakfast. 185 00:06:36,832 --> 00:06:38,932 Look! Unmatched shoes! 186 00:06:39,034 --> 00:06:40,701 He's doing everything wrong. 187 00:06:40,803 --> 00:06:42,069 But he's getting it done. 188 00:06:42,171 --> 00:06:43,270 Surprised? 189 00:06:43,372 --> 00:06:45,606 I got up a whole five minutes earlier today. 190 00:06:45,708 --> 00:06:46,974 The sun looked different. 191 00:06:47,076 --> 00:06:48,575 [HORN HONKS] There's my ride. 192 00:06:48,677 --> 00:06:50,244 What about your lunch? 193 00:06:50,346 --> 00:06:51,812 We're swinging by Jack in the Box. 194 00:06:51,914 --> 00:06:53,447 I'm treating Nicole to a Breakfast Jack 195 00:06:53,516 --> 00:06:55,649 for giving me a ride to the Honor Society pinning tonight. 196 00:06:55,751 --> 00:06:56,850 Later, nerds. 197 00:06:59,155 --> 00:06:59,953 [DOOR OPENS] 198 00:07:00,055 --> 00:07:01,321 Aha! I knew it. 199 00:07:01,424 --> 00:07:02,790 He left his homework. 200 00:07:02,892 --> 00:07:04,625 Later, 10-second-older nerds. 201 00:07:05,694 --> 00:07:07,094 [DOOR CLOSES] [SIGHS] 202 00:07:07,196 --> 00:07:08,962 He really doesn't need me. 203 00:07:09,064 --> 00:07:11,398 Hey, I still need you. 204 00:07:11,500 --> 00:07:13,267 Do you want to make me some pancakes or something? 205 00:07:14,201 --> 00:07:16,336 I've hit my limit with you early today. 206 00:07:19,804 --> 00:07:21,737 Okay, yeah, got it, Nicole. 207 00:07:22,106 --> 00:07:24,773 Y'know, I thought of you the other day... 208 00:07:24,875 --> 00:07:26,408 Oh, no, no, no. 209 00:07:26,477 --> 00:07:27,643 It's okay. 210 00:07:27,711 --> 00:07:28,810 Next time, next time. 211 00:07:28,913 --> 00:07:30,512 We're all busy. 212 00:07:31,502 --> 00:07:34,316 [CLOCK TICKING] 213 00:07:34,385 --> 00:07:35,317 [SIGHS] 214 00:07:35,386 --> 00:07:37,586 [FINGERS TAPPING] 215 00:07:37,992 --> 00:07:39,254 [SIGHS] 216 00:07:50,967 --> 00:07:51,966 Hi, Evan. 217 00:07:52,035 --> 00:07:54,302 Are you puttering around your yard? 218 00:07:54,371 --> 00:07:57,271 I'm just giving things a once-over, like you do. 219 00:07:59,542 --> 00:08:01,075 Sometimes she gets sticky. 220 00:08:01,636 --> 00:08:02,810 What's going on? 221 00:08:03,232 --> 00:08:04,961 I used to spend a lot of time helping Eddie, 222 00:08:05,013 --> 00:08:06,201 and now I'm not. 223 00:08:08,517 --> 00:08:10,885 Do you think our curb numbers need re-stenciling? 224 00:08:10,920 --> 00:08:13,120 Can you read those? 225 00:08:13,189 --> 00:08:14,989 I know how you feel. 226 00:08:15,057 --> 00:08:16,624 I used to do a lot for Marvin, 227 00:08:16,692 --> 00:08:19,460 and then I stopped so I could focus on my pregnancy. 228 00:08:19,562 --> 00:08:21,028 It was tough at first. 229 00:08:21,097 --> 00:08:23,230 Marvin rips open cereal bags like an animal. 230 00:08:23,266 --> 00:08:25,666 I mean literally from the side, with his teeth. 231 00:08:25,735 --> 00:08:28,203 Eddie does everything the wrong way, too. 232 00:08:28,337 --> 00:08:30,737 This morning, he left the house in unmatched shoes. 233 00:08:30,773 --> 00:08:33,674 Marvin drives 12 miles out of his way to go to a dry-cleaner 234 00:08:33,742 --> 00:08:36,710 because he likes to read the phrase of the day on their sign. 235 00:08:36,779 --> 00:08:38,383 Oh, I know that place. 236 00:08:38,488 --> 00:08:40,019 When the Monica Lewinsky news broke, 237 00:08:40,111 --> 00:08:41,602 they put up the word... 238 00:08:44,386 --> 00:08:45,652 Do you know what might help you? 239 00:08:45,720 --> 00:08:46,886 A hobby. 240 00:08:47,275 --> 00:08:49,389 It's a great distraction. 241 00:08:49,660 --> 00:08:50,990 It's calming to have something mindless 242 00:08:51,059 --> 00:08:52,325 to focus your energy on. 243 00:08:52,427 --> 00:08:53,493 That's what Eddie was. 244 00:08:53,562 --> 00:08:54,994 Hohh, up top! 245 00:08:55,997 --> 00:08:57,530 [CLICKS TONGUE, SIGHS] 246 00:08:59,092 --> 00:09:00,667 I have always liked yarn work. 247 00:09:01,053 --> 00:09:03,559 Oh, I got that on my trip to Chichen Itza. 248 00:09:03,625 --> 00:09:04,535 [CHUCKLES] 249 00:09:04,639 --> 00:09:05,771 M�s barato! 250 00:09:05,840 --> 00:09:08,207 M�s barato! 251 00:09:08,276 --> 00:09:10,543 I bargained for it hard. 252 00:09:11,132 --> 00:09:12,464 Then, in chapter eight, 253 00:09:12,546 --> 00:09:14,613 Sergeant Moretti says to Corporal Turetti... 254 00:09:14,682 --> 00:09:16,481 Why are all the cops Italian? 255 00:09:16,584 --> 00:09:17,916 Because they're cops. 256 00:09:17,985 --> 00:09:21,019 Cops have all different kinds of names and ethnicities. 257 00:09:21,055 --> 00:09:23,755 In my unit, we have an Officer Pemberton-Giles. 258 00:09:23,824 --> 00:09:25,557 [SIGHS] That name is so long. 259 00:09:25,659 --> 00:09:28,230 It would add like nine pages to my book. 260 00:09:28,395 --> 00:09:29,694 Uh-oh. 261 00:09:29,763 --> 00:09:30,628 Oh, no. 262 00:09:30,664 --> 00:09:33,131 [SIREN WAILING] 263 00:09:33,199 --> 00:09:34,899 Hey! Real police action. 264 00:09:35,001 --> 00:09:35,933 Hey, you! 265 00:09:36,036 --> 00:09:37,602 You need to curb your dog. 266 00:09:37,704 --> 00:09:39,370 Did you not see the sign? 267 00:09:39,439 --> 00:09:41,172 No. Sorry. I didn't. 268 00:09:41,274 --> 00:09:42,306 Oh. 269 00:09:42,375 --> 00:09:43,841 All right, then. Need a bag? 270 00:09:43,943 --> 00:09:45,255 Thank you, Officer. 271 00:09:47,580 --> 00:09:49,480 [SIGHS] 272 00:09:49,549 --> 00:09:51,916 I'll throw this away for you. 273 00:09:52,018 --> 00:09:52,850 Have a great day. 274 00:09:52,952 --> 00:09:54,118 Thanks. 275 00:09:55,789 --> 00:09:58,923 You took... the poop. 276 00:09:58,992 --> 00:10:00,825 Our job is to serve and protect. 277 00:10:00,894 --> 00:10:02,226 This is the serve part. 278 00:10:02,295 --> 00:10:04,595 There's a sealed receptacle in front of the Wells Fargo. 279 00:10:05,603 --> 00:10:08,199 I told you, I'm not sitting next to the poop. 280 00:10:09,114 --> 00:10:11,884 Either the poop is in the front and I am in the back 281 00:10:11,937 --> 00:10:14,971 or the poop is in the back and I am in the front. 282 00:10:16,508 --> 00:10:17,507 Look at him. 283 00:10:17,576 --> 00:10:18,942 So happy. [CUSTOMERS CHEERING] 284 00:10:19,011 --> 00:10:20,844 The only thing he loves more than St. Patrick's Day 285 00:10:20,946 --> 00:10:22,279 is Kenny Rogers. 286 00:10:22,347 --> 00:10:24,347 How can I tell him he's been fired by the man he loves 287 00:10:24,449 --> 00:10:25,782 on the day he loves? 288 00:10:25,884 --> 00:10:27,851 Easy. Don't tell him. 289 00:10:27,920 --> 00:10:29,152 We had a saying in the Navy... 290 00:10:29,188 --> 00:10:30,787 "Don't ruin shore leave." 291 00:10:30,856 --> 00:10:32,189 Save it for the sea. 292 00:10:32,257 --> 00:10:33,890 Right. Yeah. [CHUCKLES] 293 00:10:33,992 --> 00:10:35,091 Why ruin his St. Pat's? 294 00:10:35,160 --> 00:10:36,359 - I'll tell him tomorrow. - All right. 295 00:10:36,428 --> 00:10:38,477 I mean, the man took a taxi here. 296 00:10:38,596 --> 00:10:40,931 [MID-TEMPO BAGPIPE MUSIC PLAYING] 297 00:10:43,401 --> 00:10:46,002 Oh, pretty. What is it? 298 00:10:46,071 --> 00:10:48,504 It's a Mayan hook rug depicting an ancient game, 299 00:10:48,573 --> 00:10:50,707 similar to soccer, but instead of balls, 300 00:10:50,742 --> 00:10:53,109 people kick around the heads of men. 301 00:10:53,178 --> 00:10:55,178 Oh. Is there a women's league? 302 00:10:55,247 --> 00:10:56,846 [DOOR OPENS] EDDIE: Evan! 303 00:10:56,915 --> 00:10:59,315 I need that bus schedule and exact change you're always pushing. 304 00:10:59,384 --> 00:11:01,351 Nicole was supposed to drive me to the Honor Society ceremony 305 00:11:01,453 --> 00:11:02,995 and she never showed. 306 00:11:03,087 --> 00:11:04,553 Mom and Dad are off on their work things, 307 00:11:04,655 --> 00:11:06,388 and you know I'm not walking. 308 00:11:06,491 --> 00:11:08,124 Well, well, well. 309 00:11:08,192 --> 00:11:10,559 - Look who needs his little brother... - Evan, there's no time. 310 00:11:10,661 --> 00:11:12,027 The schedules! 311 00:11:13,865 --> 00:11:14,964 Well, well, well. 312 00:11:15,032 --> 00:11:16,999 Look who needs his little brother after all. 313 00:11:17,101 --> 00:11:19,468 Really? You bought a bus ticket just to gloat? 314 00:11:19,504 --> 00:11:21,570 Of course not. I have a pass. 315 00:11:22,047 --> 00:11:23,894 You want me to say I needed your help? 316 00:11:24,065 --> 00:11:25,755 Fine. I needed your help. 317 00:11:25,976 --> 00:11:28,010 Thank you! Finally! 318 00:11:30,447 --> 00:11:32,648 Orlando Ear, Nose, and Throat Clinic. 319 00:11:32,750 --> 00:11:34,483 Oh, sorry. I'm not requesting a stop. 320 00:11:34,552 --> 00:11:35,684 I'm just celebrating. 321 00:11:35,719 --> 00:11:37,119 Well, me too, kid. 322 00:11:37,154 --> 00:11:40,055 Every day here is a celebration for me. 323 00:11:40,090 --> 00:11:42,057 I'm celebrating paying my rent. 324 00:11:42,159 --> 00:11:43,559 Whoo-hoo! 325 00:11:43,661 --> 00:11:45,327 It's a damn party in here. 326 00:11:45,396 --> 00:11:48,085 [HORN HONKING] 327 00:11:48,678 --> 00:11:51,705 DISPATCH: All units, we've got a signal 7 on Harbor Gate Circle. 328 00:11:51,868 --> 00:11:53,167 What's that? 329 00:11:53,203 --> 00:11:54,836 Someone buy a skirt at The Limited 330 00:11:54,904 --> 00:11:56,471 and accidentally walk out of the store 331 00:11:56,539 --> 00:11:58,306 with the security tag on? 332 00:11:58,408 --> 00:11:59,941 It's a dead body. 333 00:12:00,755 --> 00:12:01,542 Really? 334 00:12:01,611 --> 00:12:02,777 You can come along, 335 00:12:02,812 --> 00:12:05,013 but we have to follow procedure to the letter. 336 00:12:05,115 --> 00:12:06,080 Once we're on the scene, 337 00:12:06,149 --> 00:12:07,582 it is imperative that you hang back, 338 00:12:07,650 --> 00:12:09,550 observe, and do not touch anything. 339 00:12:09,845 --> 00:12:11,719 I am ready. 340 00:12:11,755 --> 00:12:13,454 It seems like a heart attack. 341 00:12:13,556 --> 00:12:15,556 I've been his caretaker for a few years now, 342 00:12:15,658 --> 00:12:17,592 and it's been a long time coming. 343 00:12:17,627 --> 00:12:19,433 He was watching "Suddenly Susan" 344 00:12:19,529 --> 00:12:22,162 and just clutched his arm and went down. 345 00:12:22,265 --> 00:12:24,932 Suddenly. Like Susan. 346 00:12:25,001 --> 00:12:26,967 Oh, his robe opened when he fell. 347 00:12:27,003 --> 00:12:28,035 Do you want me to close it? 348 00:12:28,137 --> 00:12:29,136 No, we should leave him as is 349 00:12:29,171 --> 00:12:31,105 until the coroner bags him. [GAGS] 350 00:12:31,207 --> 00:12:32,907 He was laughing at a Susan joke 351 00:12:33,009 --> 00:12:34,428 when he passed. 352 00:12:34,521 --> 00:12:37,450 See the frozen smile on his face? 353 00:12:37,613 --> 00:12:40,280 Oh [CHUCKLES] the corpse is giving a thumbs-up. 354 00:12:40,349 --> 00:12:42,082 [CHUCKLES] Looks like rigor mortis set in. 355 00:12:42,184 --> 00:12:43,050 [VOMITING] 356 00:12:43,152 --> 00:12:44,151 Yep. 357 00:12:44,186 --> 00:12:46,353 Yep, the flesh is starting to purple. 358 00:12:50,992 --> 00:12:52,659 This our body? 359 00:12:52,761 --> 00:12:54,761 [MID-TEMPO BAGPIPE MUSIC PLAYING] 360 00:12:54,863 --> 00:12:56,563 [INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS] 361 00:12:56,631 --> 00:12:59,065 Whiskeys for all, on the Chestnut! 362 00:12:59,134 --> 00:13:00,099 [ALL CHEERING] 363 00:13:00,202 --> 00:13:01,801 Whoo! 364 00:13:01,837 --> 00:13:03,403 Whoa, Matthew, is that a good idea? 365 00:13:03,505 --> 00:13:04,370 It's a great idea. 366 00:13:04,439 --> 00:13:05,705 I just got off the phone with my wife. 367 00:13:05,774 --> 00:13:07,373 We're putting a down payment on a house. 368 00:13:07,476 --> 00:13:08,374 What? 369 00:13:08,443 --> 00:13:10,076 It's time I grow roots in Orlando, 370 00:13:10,145 --> 00:13:13,256 and I have never made a bad decision on St. Pat's Day. 371 00:13:13,362 --> 00:13:15,050 Marvin, something's happening here. 372 00:13:15,116 --> 00:13:16,317 [CHUCKLES] You want to weigh in? 373 00:13:16,422 --> 00:13:17,742 Shore leave? 374 00:13:18,388 --> 00:13:19,879 [STRAINED VOICE] I can't! 375 00:13:21,963 --> 00:13:24,857 Um... Matthew, we need to talk. 376 00:13:24,925 --> 00:13:26,191 Kenny Rogers called. 377 00:13:26,260 --> 00:13:27,793 Did he call to wish me St. Pat's? 378 00:13:27,895 --> 00:13:29,194 No. He did not. 379 00:13:29,297 --> 00:13:31,297 Roasters is ling for bankruptcy. 380 00:13:31,399 --> 00:13:33,165 Kenny has to let you go. 381 00:13:34,669 --> 00:13:36,035 I see. 382 00:13:38,873 --> 00:13:40,372 I need a moment. 383 00:13:40,441 --> 00:13:41,507 Yeah. 384 00:13:49,116 --> 00:13:52,084 [COIN CLINKS] 385 00:13:52,153 --> 00:13:54,253 [JUKEBOX WHIRS] 386 00:13:54,288 --> 00:13:59,525 ? On a warm summer's evenin' on a train bound for nowhere ? 387 00:14:00,200 --> 00:14:02,522 ? I met up with a gambler ? 388 00:14:02,654 --> 00:14:04,961 ? We were both too tired to sleep ? 389 00:14:05,080 --> 00:14:07,705 ? So we took turns a-starin' ? 390 00:14:07,863 --> 00:14:10,409 ? Out the window at the darkness ? 391 00:14:10,686 --> 00:14:12,217 You think he'll see that, 392 00:14:12,283 --> 00:14:13,800 or should I have tapped him on the shoulder? 393 00:14:13,905 --> 00:14:15,713 ? And he began to speak ? 394 00:14:17,444 --> 00:14:19,293 Dude, what the hell? 395 00:14:19,425 --> 00:14:20,745 "What the hell," you! 396 00:14:20,814 --> 00:14:22,113 You were supposed to pick me up at my house. 397 00:14:22,215 --> 00:14:24,115 No, you were supposed to meet me at the mall. 398 00:14:24,217 --> 00:14:26,451 I-I called and told Evan to tell you. 399 00:14:27,908 --> 00:14:29,587 Nicole, what are you even doing here? 400 00:14:29,689 --> 00:14:31,698 I'm getting my Honor Society pin. 401 00:14:31,843 --> 00:14:33,981 You're in the Honor Society? 402 00:14:34,113 --> 00:14:35,559 I thought you were just his ride. 403 00:14:35,661 --> 00:14:37,761 My grades skyrocketed since I came out. 404 00:14:37,864 --> 00:14:40,197 Turns out I was hella distracted. 405 00:14:40,577 --> 00:14:42,358 You didn't tell me on purpose 406 00:14:42,437 --> 00:14:43,868 so I'd have to come crawling back to you 407 00:14:43,970 --> 00:14:44,969 for the bus schedule. 408 00:14:45,071 --> 00:14:46,103 In my defense, 409 00:14:46,205 --> 00:14:47,438 I thought she was just dropping you off 410 00:14:47,540 --> 00:14:49,373 and you would never find out. 411 00:14:49,442 --> 00:14:51,642 Jerk move, little bro. 412 00:14:55,676 --> 00:14:57,476 I can't believe Eddie wanted to walk home. 413 00:14:57,582 --> 00:14:58,795 He hates walking. 414 00:14:58,845 --> 00:15:00,273 I guess he hates you more right now. 415 00:15:00,365 --> 00:15:02,885 Clever. Somebody earned that pin. 416 00:15:03,814 --> 00:15:04,877 Thank you for the ride. 417 00:15:04,969 --> 00:15:07,184 It's very smooth for a car made of plastic. 418 00:15:07,252 --> 00:15:08,752 What's your car made out of? 419 00:15:08,821 --> 00:15:09,986 Mm-mnh. 420 00:15:10,055 --> 00:15:11,321 It's smooth because Eddie reminded me 421 00:15:11,423 --> 00:15:12,889 to get my oil changed. 422 00:15:12,991 --> 00:15:14,891 What? No way. 423 00:15:14,927 --> 00:15:17,093 The Saturn is where we talk when things get real, 424 00:15:17,196 --> 00:15:18,662 and he said he wanted to make sure 425 00:15:18,730 --> 00:15:20,979 our safe space stayed safe. 426 00:15:21,566 --> 00:15:23,332 I think you've been underestimating him. 427 00:15:28,907 --> 00:15:30,139 [DOOR OPENS] 428 00:15:30,241 --> 00:15:31,474 The carnation, 429 00:15:31,509 --> 00:15:33,998 known throughout history as the "I'm sorry" flower. 430 00:15:34,278 --> 00:15:36,145 Don't wanna hear it. 431 00:15:36,213 --> 00:15:37,346 [DOOR CLOSES] 432 00:15:38,382 --> 00:15:40,249 Oh. "I'm sorry" flowers. 433 00:15:40,351 --> 00:15:42,651 What did you do? 434 00:15:43,066 --> 00:15:44,987 JESSICA: I'm so embarrassed. 435 00:15:45,056 --> 00:15:47,690 I've seen bodies before, at funerals, 436 00:15:47,792 --> 00:15:50,859 but... never in the wild. 437 00:15:51,406 --> 00:15:52,961 There was no makeup. 438 00:15:53,029 --> 00:15:54,718 He wasn't in his best suit. 439 00:15:54,955 --> 00:15:58,385 He was just lying there in an open robe... 440 00:15:58,715 --> 00:16:01,136 lying where he fell. 441 00:16:01,238 --> 00:16:03,071 "Lying where he fell." 442 00:16:03,140 --> 00:16:05,573 That's good. I can use that. 443 00:16:05,609 --> 00:16:08,409 At least one good thing came out of today. 444 00:16:08,478 --> 00:16:10,011 Don't be so hard on yourself. 445 00:16:10,080 --> 00:16:11,679 Look, you wanted to learn about cops. 446 00:16:11,782 --> 00:16:13,014 This is it... 447 00:16:13,083 --> 00:16:14,816 Talking it out after a hard shift, 448 00:16:14,885 --> 00:16:17,952 being there for each other, being human. 449 00:16:18,359 --> 00:16:19,995 - Authentic. - Mm-hmm. 450 00:16:21,357 --> 00:16:22,723 You're all right, Moretti. 451 00:16:24,227 --> 00:16:26,961 You're not so bad yourself, Turetti. 452 00:16:27,029 --> 00:16:28,462 A call just came in for you two. 453 00:16:28,531 --> 00:16:29,830 Thanks, Pemberton-Giles. 454 00:16:29,932 --> 00:16:31,265 I call shotgun. 455 00:16:31,300 --> 00:16:33,501 Not the seat in the car... The weapon. 456 00:16:33,767 --> 00:16:34,835 I want to be ready. 457 00:16:34,904 --> 00:16:36,737 [INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS] 458 00:16:39,269 --> 00:16:40,708 How's that cabbage taste? 459 00:16:41,643 --> 00:16:43,310 "The Gambler" said it right... 460 00:16:43,946 --> 00:16:46,246 "The best that you can hope for is to die in your sleep." 461 00:16:46,315 --> 00:16:49,082 I had no idea that song got so dark. 462 00:16:49,184 --> 00:16:50,951 I always thought it was a happy poker song. 463 00:16:51,020 --> 00:16:53,387 No happy songs take place on trains, Louis. 464 00:16:53,455 --> 00:16:55,422 What about "Chattanooga Choo Choo"? 465 00:16:55,524 --> 00:16:56,590 That's true. 466 00:16:56,658 --> 00:16:58,759 I can't even talk about trains right. 467 00:16:58,827 --> 00:17:01,061 Listen, you don't have to pray for death 468 00:17:01,163 --> 00:17:02,362 to find you in the night. 469 00:17:02,431 --> 00:17:03,897 You've turned out to be a loyal friend 470 00:17:03,966 --> 00:17:05,998 and a hell of a good guy. 471 00:17:06,267 --> 00:17:08,734 If you want it, there will always be a job for you 472 00:17:08,803 --> 00:17:10,636 here at Cattleman's Ranch. 473 00:17:12,303 --> 00:17:15,007 Buddy/new boss... 474 00:17:15,192 --> 00:17:16,409 thank you. 475 00:17:16,477 --> 00:17:18,010 [BOTH LAUGH] 476 00:17:18,112 --> 00:17:19,212 [DOOR OPENS] 477 00:17:19,280 --> 00:17:21,013 [GROANS] 478 00:17:21,049 --> 00:17:23,516 [DOOR CLOSES] Noise complaint came into the precinct, 479 00:17:23,585 --> 00:17:26,319 and it looks like this establishment is way over capacity. 480 00:17:26,387 --> 00:17:27,453 [CUSTOMERS MURMURING] 481 00:17:27,522 --> 00:17:29,755 [STILTED] Officer, what's happening? 482 00:17:30,580 --> 00:17:31,290 [NORMAL VOICE] Thanks for coming. 483 00:17:31,359 --> 00:17:33,059 Like I said on the phone, we're almost out of stout, 484 00:17:33,127 --> 00:17:35,198 and I'm afraid these people will riot. 485 00:17:35,362 --> 00:17:36,928 Everybody out, 486 00:17:37,031 --> 00:17:39,731 or I'll cite you all for drunk and disorderly. 487 00:17:39,800 --> 00:17:41,847 You first, Conan O'Brien. 488 00:17:42,322 --> 00:17:45,003 Well, you heard the man. Sorry, folks. 489 00:17:45,105 --> 00:17:46,405 Uh, take a shamrock and bring it back 490 00:17:46,473 --> 00:17:48,573 for 10% off ribs on your next visit. 491 00:17:48,676 --> 00:17:50,742 D-Don't listen to him. He's drunk. 492 00:17:50,844 --> 00:17:52,411 No discounts on the ribs. 493 00:17:52,479 --> 00:17:54,479 [CUSTOMERS GROANING] 494 00:17:55,774 --> 00:17:56,782 [GASPS] The fuzz. 495 00:17:57,250 --> 00:17:59,451 Hide, Louis! Hide! 496 00:17:59,519 --> 00:18:00,819 Ah! Ooh, ooh, ooh. 497 00:18:00,921 --> 00:18:02,187 Ah, ah! 498 00:18:03,723 --> 00:18:05,056 Okay, pass your homework forward, 499 00:18:05,158 --> 00:18:07,559 and then we'll dig in to Dickens. 500 00:18:11,551 --> 00:18:14,399 My homework. I... I forgot it. 501 00:18:14,468 --> 00:18:16,668 [DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING] 502 00:18:20,173 --> 00:18:21,539 I can't believe it. 503 00:18:21,641 --> 00:18:24,075 I've been so focused on Eddie, I forgot about myself. 504 00:18:24,143 --> 00:18:25,843 [KNOCK ON DOOR] 505 00:18:25,912 --> 00:18:27,178 What up, Ms. D.? 506 00:18:27,246 --> 00:18:29,146 Huang in the house! 507 00:18:29,215 --> 00:18:30,648 Did you get your March Madness bracket 508 00:18:30,717 --> 00:18:32,183 turned in to Mr. Carlson yet? 509 00:18:32,251 --> 00:18:34,785 I saw you took UNLV to go all the way. 510 00:18:35,074 --> 00:18:36,520 Bold. [SCOFFS] 511 00:18:36,556 --> 00:18:38,389 Can I borrow my little bro for five? 512 00:18:38,458 --> 00:18:39,890 Five? No one talks for five. 513 00:18:39,993 --> 00:18:42,666 He's your blood. Take 10. 514 00:18:45,793 --> 00:18:47,297 You forgot something this morning. 515 00:18:47,363 --> 00:18:48,788 My essay! 516 00:18:48,840 --> 00:18:51,368 I had to go back home because I forgot my wallet. 517 00:18:51,436 --> 00:18:53,293 Actually, I forgot my whole book bag. 518 00:18:53,333 --> 00:18:55,138 Full disclosure... I was wearing my swimsuit. 519 00:18:55,207 --> 00:18:56,235 I thought it was Saturday. 520 00:18:56,301 --> 00:18:58,041 And I saw it on the coffee table. 521 00:18:58,143 --> 00:18:59,442 You did this for me? 522 00:18:59,544 --> 00:19:00,977 But I've been such a jerk to you. 523 00:19:01,079 --> 00:19:02,312 I'm still mad, 524 00:19:02,381 --> 00:19:04,981 but I know how important homework is to you. 525 00:19:05,050 --> 00:19:07,751 I want to visit you at Stanford, not Georgia Tech. 526 00:19:07,853 --> 00:19:08,918 Whoa. 527 00:19:09,721 --> 00:19:11,254 But what about your school? 528 00:19:11,323 --> 00:19:14,057 Turns out Honor Society students can roll in late to homeroom 529 00:19:14,126 --> 00:19:15,592 because the monitor trusts them. 530 00:19:15,661 --> 00:19:16,793 If I'd known, 531 00:19:16,862 --> 00:19:19,596 I would have gotten one of these years ago. 532 00:19:20,198 --> 00:19:22,398 I'm sorry I underestimated you. 533 00:19:22,467 --> 00:19:24,901 I guess I liked knowing you depended on me. 534 00:19:25,493 --> 00:19:27,670 I've grown up. 535 00:19:28,290 --> 00:19:29,705 I know it's hard, little brother, 536 00:19:29,807 --> 00:19:31,340 but it's time. 537 00:19:31,442 --> 00:19:33,809 You need to let me go. 538 00:19:33,912 --> 00:19:35,144 Guess I do. 539 00:19:35,213 --> 00:19:37,079 But you were right about one thing... 540 00:19:37,182 --> 00:19:39,815 I owe you a thank-you for the Honor Society. 541 00:19:40,192 --> 00:19:41,722 Every good habit I have, 542 00:19:41,762 --> 00:19:43,352 I learned from watching you. 543 00:19:43,938 --> 00:19:44,559 Pffft. 544 00:19:44,677 --> 00:19:46,148 As Marcus Aurelius said, 545 00:19:46,306 --> 00:19:49,921 "Waste no more time arguing what a good man should be. 546 00:19:50,482 --> 00:19:51,794 Be one." 547 00:19:52,217 --> 00:19:53,349 Wow. 548 00:19:53,451 --> 00:19:54,951 You get that from the dry-cleaner's sign? 549 00:19:54,986 --> 00:19:56,820 From Marvin, who got it from the dry-cleaner's sign. 550 00:19:59,624 --> 00:20:03,226 [MUSIC PLAYING ON TELEVISION] 551 00:20:03,295 --> 00:20:04,727 Good. You're all here. 552 00:20:06,364 --> 00:20:07,297 [REMOTE CONTROL CLATTERS] 553 00:20:07,399 --> 00:20:08,531 I've revised my book, 554 00:20:08,600 --> 00:20:10,733 and I'm sending the new pages to Vera. 555 00:20:10,836 --> 00:20:13,369 "Jennifer Hong spots the cold, dead corpse 556 00:20:13,471 --> 00:20:16,039 spilling out of its open bathrobe. 557 00:20:16,174 --> 00:20:20,176 Unafraid to show her humanity, she vomits. 558 00:20:20,278 --> 00:20:22,412 Captain Pemberton-Giles smiles. 559 00:20:22,514 --> 00:20:24,247 'That's why she's the best. 560 00:20:24,349 --> 00:20:27,217 She hasn't forgotten how to feel.'" 561 00:20:27,319 --> 00:20:28,384 - Hmm. - Mm. 562 00:20:28,420 --> 00:20:29,319 It's good. 563 00:20:29,421 --> 00:20:32,055 Oh, I also revised my author bio. 564 00:20:32,157 --> 00:20:33,356 "Jessica Huang... 565 00:20:33,458 --> 00:20:35,035 Wife, mother, 566 00:20:35,154 --> 00:20:37,093 has seen a dead body." 567 00:20:40,511 --> 00:20:41,543 Morning, all! 568 00:20:41,612 --> 00:20:43,180 Slept through literally all of yesterday, 569 00:20:43,220 --> 00:20:46,505 but today I am feeling F-I-N-E fine. 570 00:20:46,582 --> 00:20:48,916 It's so odd... I haven't heard from Kenny in a while. 571 00:20:49,018 --> 00:20:51,685 He usually calls me to wish me a happy St. Pat's. 572 00:20:51,787 --> 00:20:53,020 Uh, Matthew, 573 00:20:53,089 --> 00:20:55,589 how much do you remember from St. Patrick's Day? 574 00:20:55,691 --> 00:20:57,391 I remember coming to work in a taxi 575 00:20:57,493 --> 00:20:59,026 and dancing a jig 576 00:20:59,095 --> 00:21:00,661 and trading hats with Mark the Bear, 577 00:21:00,763 --> 00:21:02,763 and after that, 578 00:21:02,865 --> 00:21:04,556 um... 579 00:21:05,234 --> 00:21:07,534 it's blur city, man. 580 00:21:07,603 --> 00:21:08,569 Oh. 581 00:21:08,671 --> 00:21:10,070 Um, sit down. 582 00:21:10,172 --> 00:21:11,405 Okay. 583 00:21:13,142 --> 00:21:16,076 I have to tell you something... again. 584 00:21:16,178 --> 00:21:17,344 Uh, but before I start, 585 00:21:17,446 --> 00:21:18,979 just know there is a happy ending. 586 00:21:19,081 --> 00:21:20,614 Oh, I already know I got a tattoo there, 587 00:21:20,716 --> 00:21:21,815 and I'm okay with it. 588 00:21:21,917 --> 00:21:23,083 [SIGHS] 589 00:21:23,768 --> 00:21:26,697 sync and corrected by ninh www.addic7ed.com 590 00:21:26,747 --> 00:21:31,297 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 40842

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