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1
00:00:04,453 --> 00:00:05,920
Ugh. What the hell is that?
2
00:00:05,922 --> 00:00:07,162
Did you lose a bet?
3
00:00:07,164 --> 00:00:08,630
Not everyone has a gambling problem
4
00:00:08,632 --> 00:00:10,332
- like you, Phil.
- Want to bet?
5
00:00:10,334 --> 00:00:11,633
Okay, if you must know,
6
00:00:11,635 --> 00:00:14,202
this is my once-a-month
Saengseon Hoe from Han Goya's.
7
00:00:14,204 --> 00:00:16,538
It's a Korean fish delicacy,
8
00:00:16,540 --> 00:00:17,873
and it costs an arm and a leg.
9
00:00:17,875 --> 00:00:19,375
So long as you didn't pay
actual money for it.
10
00:00:19,377 --> 00:00:20,843
Why is that a smell?
11
00:00:20,845 --> 00:00:22,144
Did you find that in the morgue?
12
00:00:22,146 --> 00:00:23,512
Okay.
13
00:00:23,514 --> 00:00:24,914
Hey, we're still on to watch hoops
14
00:00:24,916 --> 00:00:26,816
- later this afternoon, right?
- You know it.
15
00:00:26,818 --> 00:00:28,651
Carlos wins our bracket every year.
16
00:00:28,653 --> 00:00:30,119
Don't ask me how.
17
00:00:30,121 --> 00:00:32,355
It'd be like you winning
an empathy contest.
18
00:00:32,357 --> 00:00:34,957
Or you dating someone that
wasn't a magician's assistant.
19
00:00:34,959 --> 00:00:36,659
Ha. You know, you could be funny.
20
00:00:36,661 --> 00:00:38,728
- Okay.
- People V. Danfield.
21
00:00:38,730 --> 00:00:41,843
Ooh, Diamond Danfield, huh?
22
00:00:41,845 --> 00:00:44,109
Good luck with that.
Word of advice, take the deal.
23
00:00:44,136 --> 00:00:45,369
The guy's in and out of here all day.
24
00:00:45,371 --> 00:00:46,870
Oh, I can see you repped him once.
25
00:00:46,872 --> 00:00:48,672
That's... that's probably why he's back.
26
00:00:48,674 --> 00:00:50,140
There's only so much we can do.
27
00:00:50,142 --> 00:00:51,475
Yeah, so much you could do.
28
00:00:51,477 --> 00:00:53,477
- I can get him a better deal.
- Ooh, okay.
29
00:00:53,479 --> 00:00:55,078
Fancy girl getting a little cocky.
30
00:00:55,080 --> 00:00:58,515
- Care to make it interesting?
- Sure, why not?
31
00:00:58,517 --> 00:01:00,183
- I thought you didn't gamble.
- It's not gambling
32
00:01:00,185 --> 00:01:01,968
- if you know you're gonna win.
- Ooh, okay.
33
00:01:01,988 --> 00:01:03,320
- $10?
- Fine.
34
00:01:03,322 --> 00:01:04,588
All right.
35
00:01:04,590 --> 00:01:05,956
I can't work in these conditions.
36
00:01:05,958 --> 00:01:08,425
Wait. Why? What?
[Applause]
37
00:01:08,427 --> 00:01:09,894
I think I love her.
38
00:01:09,896 --> 00:01:12,496
sync and correction by solfieri
www.addic7ed.com
39
00:01:12,498 --> 00:01:14,115
Benched - 01x08
Diamond Is a Girl's Worst Friend
40
00:01:14,117 --> 00:01:15,818
Hey now
41
00:01:16,789 --> 00:01:18,970
Thanks again for everything, all right?
42
00:01:18,972 --> 00:01:20,305
See you again soon.
43
00:01:20,307 --> 00:01:21,806
No, I hope not, Diamond.
44
00:01:21,808 --> 00:01:22,974
Oh, right!
45
00:01:22,976 --> 00:01:24,643
[Laughter]
46
00:01:24,645 --> 00:01:27,646
- Take care.
- Okay.
47
00:01:27,648 --> 00:01:30,982
Oh, hey. I totally Whitleyed
that D.A. in there.
48
00:01:30,984 --> 00:01:32,117
- "Whitleyed"?
- Yeah.
49
00:01:32,119 --> 00:01:33,585
Think I'm putting that on a t-shirt.
50
00:01:33,587 --> 00:01:35,254
- Put you down for a small?
- All right.
51
00:01:35,256 --> 00:01:36,588
That's a bet.
52
00:01:36,590 --> 00:01:37,789
I got that guy a great deal.
53
00:01:37,792 --> 00:01:39,592
I mean, short parole,
as long as he proves that
54
00:01:39,594 --> 00:01:41,594
he's looking for a job
and takes anger management.
55
00:01:41,596 --> 00:01:43,329
- And boom...
- "Boom," what?
56
00:01:43,331 --> 00:01:44,797
Boom, we won't be seeing him again.
57
00:01:44,799 --> 00:01:45,798
I did what you couldn't.
58
00:01:45,800 --> 00:01:47,833
[Laughs] So you saved this poor wretch
59
00:01:47,835 --> 00:01:49,869
with your superior lawyering, is that it?
60
00:01:49,871 --> 00:01:51,704
Yeah.
61
00:01:51,706 --> 00:01:54,851
- He'll be back by the end of the week.
- That sounds very much like a bet.
62
00:01:55,076 --> 00:01:57,176
- Double or nothing?
- Yeah.
63
00:01:57,178 --> 00:01:59,178
Boom.
64
00:01:59,180 --> 00:02:00,847
- Another hard-fought day.
- Yeah.
65
00:02:00,849 --> 00:02:03,049
And our well-deserved reward:
Some college basketball
66
00:02:03,051 --> 00:02:04,476
and your mysterious gambling insight.
67
00:02:04,478 --> 00:02:05,786
Well, it's not that mysterious.
68
00:02:05,788 --> 00:02:07,054
Hey, uh, listen up, folks.
69
00:02:07,056 --> 00:02:09,089
Internet is spotty at best,
so just please stay away
70
00:02:09,091 --> 00:02:10,757
from wires, and don't go online
71
00:02:10,759 --> 00:02:12,593
for the next hour, hour and 20.
72
00:02:12,595 --> 00:02:14,962
Great. Larry, that goes
for the phone too, huh?
73
00:02:14,964 --> 00:02:17,965
- Okay, well, keep it elevated, mom.
- [Yelling] Larry, I told you...
74
00:02:17,967 --> 00:02:19,099
It's a public park.
75
00:02:19,101 --> 00:02:20,701
I'm sure someone will come by soon.
76
00:02:20,703 --> 00:02:22,537
- Larry!
- How far off the trail did you roll?
77
00:02:22,539 --> 00:02:23,905
[Yelling indistinctly]
78
00:02:23,907 --> 00:02:25,440
Stay strong.
79
00:02:25,442 --> 00:02:27,241
Perfect.
80
00:02:27,243 --> 00:02:28,776
[Keys clacking]
81
00:02:28,778 --> 00:02:30,778
Who's typing? Who's typ...
What is that? Oh, come on.
82
00:02:30,780 --> 00:02:31,945
- Hey, the signal!
- What are you doing?
83
00:02:32,020 --> 00:02:33,681
I'm downloading your case files.
84
00:02:33,683 --> 00:02:35,016
Well, do it in another building.
85
00:02:35,018 --> 00:02:36,451
Work time's over. It's casual time.
86
00:02:36,453 --> 00:02:37,619
- Casual time.
- Right.
87
00:02:37,621 --> 00:02:39,587
Because you were so great in court today.
88
00:02:39,589 --> 00:02:41,723
I beg your pardon.
89
00:02:41,725 --> 00:02:43,725
What would you have done differently?
90
00:02:43,727 --> 00:02:45,859
Argued for continuance
based on changes in testimony,
91
00:02:45,896 --> 00:02:48,129
cited People vs. Hawthorne
in the Saxon case,
92
00:02:48,131 --> 00:02:51,967
got Mason O.R. due to his
extensive community involvement.
93
00:02:51,969 --> 00:02:53,868
- Do you want me to continue?
- You... you know what?
94
00:02:53,870 --> 00:02:55,537
When you're in court
and those lights are...
95
00:02:55,539 --> 00:02:57,734
And everyone's looking,
and it's... it's different, okay?
96
00:02:57,736 --> 00:02:58,936
If you say so.
97
00:03:01,412 --> 00:03:02,845
Hey, come on. Ignore her.
98
00:03:02,847 --> 00:03:04,313
She's an intern. What does she know?
99
00:03:04,315 --> 00:03:07,350
Someone should teach her
a lesson, because...
100
00:03:08,386 --> 00:03:09,886
You know, we could.
101
00:03:09,888 --> 00:03:12,021
We could have her prepare that DUI case.
102
00:03:12,023 --> 00:03:13,423
Oh, DUIs are impossible.
103
00:03:13,425 --> 00:03:14,557
She'll fail for sure.
104
00:03:14,559 --> 00:03:16,426
- Exactly, yeah.
- All right.
105
00:03:16,428 --> 00:03:18,027
Maybe this reckless endangerment case
106
00:03:18,029 --> 00:03:19,729
will have a happy ending after all.
107
00:03:19,731 --> 00:03:21,965
Well, except for those that
were recklessly endangered.
108
00:03:32,244 --> 00:03:34,244
Oh, hey, Diamond... [yells]
109
00:03:34,246 --> 00:03:35,820
Just don't... don't... don't get my face.
110
00:03:35,848 --> 00:03:38,682
Just, not in the face. Face is off-limits.
111
00:03:38,684 --> 00:03:41,685
I'm robbing you,
not killing you. Get up.
112
00:03:41,687 --> 00:03:44,021
[Stammering] You thank...
You thanked me earlier.
113
00:03:44,023 --> 00:03:46,157
- What... why?
- Yeah, I was being courteous.
114
00:03:46,159 --> 00:03:47,591
Now I'm mugging you.
115
00:03:47,593 --> 00:03:48,993
I don't understand. I got you a great deal.
116
00:03:48,995 --> 00:03:50,561
All you have to do is prove
you're looking for a job
117
00:03:50,563 --> 00:03:51,554
and take anger management classes.
118
00:03:51,598 --> 00:03:53,765
Yeah, and those classes
cost money. Thank you.
119
00:03:53,767 --> 00:03:56,100
So you commit another crime?
120
00:03:56,102 --> 00:03:58,236
And you wonder why
you're stuck in the system?
121
00:03:58,238 --> 00:04:00,265
I'm stuck in the system
because I don't have no money.
122
00:04:00,273 --> 00:04:02,941
Now... now hand over the purse.
123
00:04:02,943 --> 00:04:04,609
Is that a fake... it's a fake gun.
124
00:04:04,611 --> 00:04:05,777
That's a fake gun.
125
00:04:05,779 --> 00:04:07,312
Guns cost money.
126
00:04:07,314 --> 00:04:09,647
I... I took this from,
like, a local theater.
127
00:04:09,649 --> 00:04:10,703
Oh, my God. How do you sleep at night?
128
00:04:10,751 --> 00:04:12,684
Poorly. You know, a good bed...
129
00:04:12,686 --> 00:04:14,019
Both: Costs money.
130
00:04:14,021 --> 00:04:15,954
Look, please, just give me
the purse, all right?
131
00:04:15,956 --> 00:04:18,590
- So I can take the stupid class.
- I can't legally give a client money.
132
00:04:18,592 --> 00:04:20,693
So you're gonna have to rob me.
133
00:04:20,695 --> 00:04:22,601
Just do it gently, okay?
134
00:04:23,564 --> 00:04:25,218
- Okay, um...
- Go ahead.
135
00:04:25,233 --> 00:04:27,233
I'm the robber. This is a robbery.
136
00:04:27,235 --> 00:04:28,476
You're the victim.
137
00:04:29,404 --> 00:04:32,038
I'm so glad I know my character.
138
00:04:32,040 --> 00:04:33,005
Yeah. Okay. Oh, look.
139
00:04:33,007 --> 00:04:35,074
20, 40... okay, cool.
140
00:04:35,076 --> 00:04:36,867
What is this? What's this?
141
00:04:36,878 --> 00:04:37,977
You do not take that.
142
00:04:37,979 --> 00:04:39,512
They... they discontinued that color.
143
00:04:39,514 --> 00:04:42,182
- "Cheesecake vacation"?
- It's...
144
00:04:42,184 --> 00:04:44,184
Hello! Ow!
145
00:04:44,186 --> 00:04:45,524
You know what? Just take the money.
146
00:04:45,526 --> 00:04:47,094
I'm gonna call you tomorrow
and make sure that
147
00:04:47,096 --> 00:04:49,210
you're looking for a job and that
you registered for classes, okay?
148
00:04:49,212 --> 00:04:52,126
You know these expired a year ago.
149
00:04:52,128 --> 00:04:53,195
Oh...
150
00:04:56,165 --> 00:04:57,199
Micah?
151
00:04:58,634 --> 00:05:00,502
Micah?
152
00:05:03,272 --> 00:05:05,639
Micah, you are in the closet.
153
00:05:05,641 --> 00:05:08,368
- What's that supposed to mean?
- Nothing.
154
00:05:08,444 --> 00:05:10,144
Um, I need you to call
Diamond Danfield
155
00:05:10,146 --> 00:05:12,313
to make sure that he registered
for anger management.
156
00:05:12,315 --> 00:05:14,148
Yeah, no.
157
00:05:14,150 --> 00:05:17,385
Actually, Phil and Carlos have me
doing some actual casework,
158
00:05:17,387 --> 00:05:19,754
so you're gonna have to make
your own phone calls.
159
00:05:19,756 --> 00:05:23,225
Well, pssh, you ever
coming out of the closet, or...
160
00:05:25,129 --> 00:05:27,663
You're literally in a closet.
161
00:05:30,000 --> 00:05:31,466
Great.
162
00:05:31,468 --> 00:05:32,667
How do you a find a guy
163
00:05:32,669 --> 00:05:34,102
whose phone has been disconnected?
164
00:05:34,104 --> 00:05:36,104
Oh, that's simple. Get a map of Los Angeles.
165
00:05:36,106 --> 00:05:37,739
- Go everywhere.
- Not helpful.
166
00:05:37,741 --> 00:05:40,063
I was calling Diamond to make sure
he registered for his class.
167
00:05:40,111 --> 00:05:41,310
I told you he was gonna end up
168
00:05:41,312 --> 00:05:43,145
back in the system one way or another.
169
00:05:43,147 --> 00:05:45,681
Just admit I'm right, huh?
170
00:05:45,683 --> 00:05:47,250
I'm gonna go find him.
171
00:05:49,187 --> 00:05:50,586
[Police siren wailing]
172
00:05:50,588 --> 00:05:53,457
[Muffled shouting]
173
00:05:55,093 --> 00:05:57,326
- Diamond, open up.
- Who is it?
174
00:05:57,328 --> 00:06:00,596
- It's Nina.
- Nina who?
175
00:06:00,598 --> 00:06:02,063
- Are you serious?
- You mugged me yesterday.
176
00:06:02,067 --> 00:06:03,967
You got to be more specific than that.
177
00:06:03,969 --> 00:06:06,636
Okay, that's not something
you want to say to your lawyer,
178
00:06:06,638 --> 00:06:09,040
and I'm your lawyer, Nina Whitley.
179
00:06:09,074 --> 00:06:11,908
Nina! What's up, baby?
180
00:06:11,910 --> 00:06:13,410
Come on. [Chuckles]
181
00:06:13,412 --> 00:06:14,868
So your phone's disconnected.
182
00:06:14,914 --> 00:06:16,880
Oh, that's not my phone. That's Ed's.
183
00:06:16,882 --> 00:06:18,415
Uh, I'm just here crashing. That's it.
184
00:06:18,417 --> 00:06:19,817
- Oh, sure, sure, crashing.
- Yeah.
185
00:06:19,819 --> 00:06:22,519
Well, you were, uh, supposed
to look for a job today.
186
00:06:22,521 --> 00:06:24,188
Remember that plan? What happened there?
187
00:06:24,190 --> 00:06:25,856
Oh, you know I ain't got no car
188
00:06:25,858 --> 00:06:26,957
to go to no job interviews.
189
00:06:26,959 --> 00:06:29,193
I mean, I don't even know
where to even look for a job.
190
00:06:29,195 --> 00:06:30,861
And I ain't got no shirt to wear.
191
00:06:30,863 --> 00:06:33,531
Nope. No, no, no.
192
00:06:33,533 --> 00:06:34,602
We... we are gonna get you a shirt.
193
00:06:34,667 --> 00:06:35,700
[Exhales]
194
00:06:35,702 --> 00:06:38,236
We're gonna get you a shirt,
and we're gonna get you a job.
195
00:06:38,238 --> 00:06:40,705
Pants... pants first.
Pants fir... uh, pants first.
196
00:06:40,707 --> 00:06:42,240
- Come on.
- Now, now, I...
197
00:06:42,242 --> 00:06:44,008
I wasn't trying to guilt-trip
you or nothing like that.
198
00:06:44,010 --> 00:06:45,243
No, no. I didn't take it that way.
199
00:06:45,245 --> 00:06:47,352
Shirt, pants, job.
200
00:06:57,266 --> 00:06:59,767
Hey, Larry, our office lends
out shirts for court, right?
201
00:06:59,769 --> 00:07:02,803
Like, decent, conservative,
for court appearances and stuff?
202
00:07:02,805 --> 00:07:05,407
Actually, we do, and you'll never
guess who's in charge of...
203
00:07:05,409 --> 00:07:06,675
Great. We'll take one for him.
204
00:07:06,810 --> 00:07:08,910
I only wear Varvatos
from Head to Tizzoe.
205
00:07:08,912 --> 00:07:11,379
- All right, player?
- I'm the exact same way.
206
00:07:11,381 --> 00:07:14,549
- You barely have pants.
- We'll take whatever fits.
207
00:07:14,551 --> 00:07:16,217
Like, something in, like, a Polo
208
00:07:16,219 --> 00:07:18,186
but, like, with a nice pointy collar.
209
00:07:18,188 --> 00:07:19,654
Something sexy, cool.
210
00:07:19,656 --> 00:07:21,223
We do have one. It's green.
211
00:07:21,225 --> 00:07:22,424
Uh, that ain't my palette, player.
212
00:07:22,426 --> 00:07:23,759
Literally any shirt.
213
00:07:23,761 --> 00:07:24,760
Now, you would look good
214
00:07:24,762 --> 00:07:26,728
in, like, an off-white Oxford.
215
00:07:26,730 --> 00:07:28,730
It's kind of like a cream, sand color.
216
00:07:28,732 --> 00:07:29,965
Ladies ain't feeling that.
217
00:07:29,967 --> 00:07:31,099
Great. We'll take it.
218
00:07:31,101 --> 00:07:32,601
And what court will you be appearing at?
219
00:07:32,603 --> 00:07:33,969
Uh, no. It's for a job interview.
220
00:07:33,971 --> 00:07:38,006
Uh, we only lend out shirts
for court appearances.
221
00:07:38,008 --> 00:07:40,376
Give me the shirt
before I bury you in the desert.
222
00:07:41,738 --> 00:07:43,304
I'll put court four.
223
00:07:43,314 --> 00:07:44,981
Favorite court. Thank you. That's great.
224
00:07:47,085 --> 00:07:48,751
Yeah. No, I mailed that check.
225
00:07:48,753 --> 00:07:51,454
I know. Well, I owe you... yeah, okay.
226
00:07:51,456 --> 00:07:53,329
I got to go. Carlos?
227
00:07:53,331 --> 00:07:54,457
[Clears throat]
228
00:07:54,459 --> 00:07:56,225
Micah, how's the Newcomb case coming?
229
00:07:56,227 --> 00:07:57,660
DUIs are tough, huh?
230
00:07:57,662 --> 00:07:59,141
Yeah, but I found a defense.
231
00:07:59,264 --> 00:08:01,731
See, the client was not tested
until he got to the station.
232
00:08:01,733 --> 00:08:03,934
We could argue he was below 0.08
when pulled over
233
00:08:03,936 --> 00:08:05,969
and not over the limit until later.
234
00:08:05,971 --> 00:08:08,138
There's precedent.
It's called a rising defense.
235
00:08:08,140 --> 00:08:09,806
I'm surprised you haven't heard of it.
236
00:08:09,808 --> 00:08:12,809
Actually, I'm not surprised
you haven't heard of it.
237
00:08:12,811 --> 00:08:15,312
- Kay, that's really good.
- Yeah, I thought so.
238
00:08:15,314 --> 00:08:17,001
Do you ever smile? Laugh?
239
00:08:17,149 --> 00:08:19,783
Only when I'm nervous,
and I never get nervous.
240
00:08:19,785 --> 00:08:21,415
Really? Not even when, like... boo!
241
00:08:21,454 --> 00:08:23,008
That's just sad.
242
00:08:24,424 --> 00:08:26,090
Kay, so much for teaching her a lesson.
243
00:08:26,092 --> 00:08:27,291
She's a genius.
244
00:08:27,293 --> 00:08:29,126
Yeah, we should give her all our cases.
245
00:08:29,128 --> 00:08:31,095
We should give her all our cases.
246
00:08:31,097 --> 00:08:32,188
That'll only boost her ego.
247
00:08:32,198 --> 00:08:34,298
No, that'll give us more time to...
248
00:08:34,300 --> 00:08:36,501
Watch more basketball.
249
00:08:36,503 --> 00:08:39,338
We're the geniuses. Yes.
250
00:08:42,342 --> 00:08:44,175
What kind of name is Han Goya?
251
00:08:44,177 --> 00:08:45,501
Your name's Diamond.
252
00:08:45,646 --> 00:08:48,079
Because no one cuts Diamond but Diamond.
253
00:08:48,081 --> 00:08:49,548
Okay, that makes sense.
254
00:08:49,550 --> 00:08:51,483
Nina, the usual?
255
00:08:51,485 --> 00:08:52,751
Oh, no, not today, Han.
256
00:08:52,753 --> 00:08:54,653
I was actually wondering,
are you still hiring?
257
00:08:54,655 --> 00:08:55,977
Because my friend here
is looking for a job.
258
00:08:56,056 --> 00:08:59,024
Actually, we do need
another helper in the back.
259
00:08:59,026 --> 00:09:01,026
- Come with me.
- Okay.
260
00:09:01,028 --> 00:09:05,649
So what we need is some help
in our fish prep area.
261
00:09:05,867 --> 00:09:08,200
Heads go here. Guts go there.
262
00:09:08,202 --> 00:09:10,202
- Spines go...
- Hell, no.
263
00:09:10,204 --> 00:09:11,637
I'm not doing this.
264
00:09:11,639 --> 00:09:13,339
Look, we just need a signature saying that
265
00:09:13,341 --> 00:09:14,227
I looked for the job.
266
00:09:14,243 --> 00:09:16,643
Let's get that
and get the hell out of here.
267
00:09:16,645 --> 00:09:19,312
Okay, could you excuse us
for just one second?
268
00:09:19,314 --> 00:09:21,848
Quick second? Okay, look.
269
00:09:21,850 --> 00:09:23,617
You were right this morning
when you said that I could do more.
270
00:09:23,619 --> 00:09:24,885
Again, I wasn't guilting you.
271
00:09:24,887 --> 00:09:26,086
All right, but I did do more.
272
00:09:26,088 --> 00:09:27,154
I got you that shirt,
273
00:09:27,156 --> 00:09:28,235
and now I got you this job offer.
274
00:09:28,290 --> 00:09:29,623
You need to start taking responsibility
275
00:09:29,625 --> 00:09:30,477
for yourself too.
276
00:09:30,555 --> 00:09:31,755
It's not enough if I believe in you
277
00:09:31,761 --> 00:09:32,726
if you don't also.
278
00:09:32,728 --> 00:09:34,328
You got to start holding yourself to a...
279
00:09:34,330 --> 00:09:35,529
To a higher standard.
280
00:09:35,531 --> 00:09:37,631
Were you just quoting Bill Cosby to me?
281
00:09:37,633 --> 00:09:39,433
A little Cosby might have
slipped in there, yeah.
282
00:09:39,435 --> 00:09:41,635
Never quote Bill Cosby
to another black man.
283
00:09:41,637 --> 00:09:43,797
- Do you understand me?
- I got it.
284
00:09:43,873 --> 00:09:45,373
Mr. Han?
285
00:09:45,375 --> 00:09:47,751
I apologize for the way I acted earlier,
286
00:09:47,836 --> 00:09:49,302
and I'd love to work for you.
287
00:09:49,312 --> 00:09:51,212
Sure. Can you start tomorrow?
288
00:09:51,214 --> 00:09:52,213
Tomorrow?
289
00:09:52,215 --> 00:09:53,493
Yes. Tomorrow would be great.
290
00:09:53,516 --> 00:09:55,850
And, Han, thank you so much.
291
00:09:55,852 --> 00:09:57,518
Employment is such an important
292
00:09:57,520 --> 00:10:00,255
but difficult step for ex-convicts.
293
00:10:00,257 --> 00:10:02,790
Convict?
294
00:10:02,792 --> 00:10:03,791
Well, you know what?
295
00:10:03,793 --> 00:10:05,226
At least we got the signature,
296
00:10:05,228 --> 00:10:07,061
and now all you have to do is show up
297
00:10:07,063 --> 00:10:08,758
for the anger management class
you had registered for,
298
00:10:08,899 --> 00:10:10,532
and you're out of the system.
299
00:10:10,534 --> 00:10:14,402
- Registered?
- Seriously?
300
00:10:14,404 --> 00:10:17,038
[Sports announcer speaking]
301
00:10:17,040 --> 00:10:19,251
Okay, all the experts
have picked Syracuse,
302
00:10:19,377 --> 00:10:20,543
but you like UNC. Why?
303
00:10:20,545 --> 00:10:22,211
Well, for starters, I love Chapel Hill.
304
00:10:22,213 --> 00:10:23,812
It's an idyllic college town.
305
00:10:23,814 --> 00:10:25,548
Wonderful little teashops. In the spring...
306
00:10:25,550 --> 00:10:27,477
Okay, but on-the-court reasons.
307
00:10:27,552 --> 00:10:29,719
Now, I get that they have
five great freshmen.
308
00:10:29,721 --> 00:10:32,547
Okay, typically, I would pick Syracuse,
309
00:10:32,549 --> 00:10:35,391
because their costume is orange,
like a basketball.
310
00:10:35,393 --> 00:10:37,560
But I've got cousins in North Carolina.
311
00:10:37,562 --> 00:10:39,162
So, Phil?
312
00:10:39,164 --> 00:10:42,665
Family trumps costumes, every time.
313
00:10:42,667 --> 00:10:44,618
- Yes.
- Okay, I get it.
314
00:10:44,620 --> 00:10:47,274
If you don't like caprese,
you should've bought your own lunch.
315
00:10:47,339 --> 00:10:49,773
- Lunch costs money.
- Oh, my God, I know. Okay?
316
00:10:49,775 --> 00:10:51,308
Let's just get you signed up for class.
317
00:10:51,310 --> 00:10:53,711
Yeah, you know what?
Your... your gambling strategy,
318
00:10:53,713 --> 00:10:55,879
it's the same one that
my grandmother uses for bingo.
319
00:10:55,881 --> 00:10:57,548
No. No. No. This is proven.
320
00:10:57,550 --> 00:10:59,550
See this kid with the ball?
His name is Milan.
321
00:10:59,552 --> 00:11:00,961
He's going to travel.
322
00:11:01,053 --> 00:11:02,420
Get it? Travel to Milan.
323
00:11:02,422 --> 00:11:04,821
And there's Milan with the travel!
324
00:11:05,725 --> 00:11:06,724
Are you a witch?
325
00:11:07,711 --> 00:11:10,161
Maybe you should've been
giving them the Bill Cosby speech.
326
00:11:10,163 --> 00:11:12,196
Hey, Phil, I looked over
the Stoller case,
327
00:11:12,198 --> 00:11:14,065
and, um, quick question, were you planning
328
00:11:14,067 --> 00:11:15,800
on leaving it this half-assed?
329
00:11:15,802 --> 00:11:18,743
- Excuse me?
- You cited criminal code 3480.
330
00:11:18,819 --> 00:11:20,238
Yeah, self-defense.
331
00:11:20,240 --> 00:11:22,204
No. Self-defense is 3470.
332
00:11:22,242 --> 00:11:24,576
Oh. Whoops.
333
00:11:24,578 --> 00:11:26,411
Whatever. I would've
figured it out in court.
334
00:11:26,413 --> 00:11:27,704
- Thank you.
- Whatever?
335
00:11:27,781 --> 00:11:30,916
You're right. You're right.
It's just someone's life.
336
00:11:30,918 --> 00:11:32,451
Oh, I'm sorry.
337
00:11:32,453 --> 00:11:34,532
I didn't realize that law students...
338
00:11:34,589 --> 00:11:36,589
You know what? I think it might be best
339
00:11:36,591 --> 00:11:38,424
if you tried a case this afternoon.
340
00:11:38,426 --> 00:11:40,326
I know it's your first trial,
but if I supervise,
341
00:11:40,328 --> 00:11:43,162
- I think it's okay under PTLS.
- Of course I'll do it, Phil.
342
00:11:43,164 --> 00:11:45,297
It's the least the client deserves.
343
00:11:45,299 --> 00:11:47,001
That's true.
344
00:11:47,069 --> 00:11:48,635
Ah, you are all registered for class.
345
00:11:48,637 --> 00:11:50,570
But it starts in a half hour,
so you're gonna have to hustle.
346
00:11:50,572 --> 00:11:51,905
- A half hour?
- Yeah.
347
00:11:51,907 --> 00:11:54,207
That ain't much time to go get a job,
348
00:11:54,209 --> 00:11:57,477
make some money, take that money
to a car dealership,
349
00:11:57,479 --> 00:12:00,480
negotiate a deal, buy a car,
350
00:12:00,482 --> 00:12:02,982
- drive the car to the class...
- I'll drive you.
351
00:12:02,984 --> 00:12:04,785
Maybe we could stop at Burger King?
352
00:12:07,189 --> 00:12:09,302
- Hi, hi.
- Hey.
353
00:12:09,358 --> 00:12:13,360
- Diamond Danfield.
- Danfield.
354
00:12:13,362 --> 00:12:16,563
Danf... I don't see a Diamond Danfield.
355
00:12:16,565 --> 00:12:19,066
Okay, okay, all right,
well, we registered online
356
00:12:19,068 --> 00:12:21,635
- a half an hour ago, so...
- Oh, I'm sorry.
357
00:12:21,637 --> 00:12:24,805
You have to register online
at least 12 hours in advance...
358
00:12:24,807 --> 00:12:25,977
No. What is your name?
359
00:12:26,009 --> 00:12:27,908
- Ruth Coleman.
- Ruth, no, uh-uh.
360
00:12:27,910 --> 00:12:30,244
I'm LAPD, Los Angeles public defenders?
361
00:12:30,246 --> 00:12:31,688
We give you half of your clientele.
362
00:12:31,714 --> 00:12:33,381
Without us, you'd be nothing.
363
00:12:33,383 --> 00:12:35,917
You'd be working nights at
TGI Fridays, making croutons.
364
00:12:35,919 --> 00:12:36,945
Okay, Ruth?
365
00:12:36,987 --> 00:12:38,520
So why don't you just drop
366
00:12:38,522 --> 00:12:40,855
the bureaucratic bullsh...
And let my client here,
367
00:12:40,857 --> 00:12:43,159
Diamond Danfield, take the class?
368
00:12:45,496 --> 00:12:48,296
I was going to say,
you have to register online
369
00:12:48,298 --> 00:12:50,999
12 hours in advance
so your name appears on my list,
370
00:12:51,001 --> 00:12:53,168
but, you know,
walk-ins are always welcome.
371
00:12:53,170 --> 00:12:55,837
So go right on ahead
and fill out some paperwork.
372
00:12:55,839 --> 00:12:57,673
Ruth is my favorite name.
373
00:12:57,675 --> 00:12:58,808
- Hey.
- Hey.
374
00:12:58,810 --> 00:13:01,944
Uh... thank you.
375
00:13:01,946 --> 00:13:04,613
You're welcome. Have a great class.
376
00:13:04,615 --> 00:13:06,282
And I'll... I'll see you in an hour, okay?
377
00:13:06,284 --> 00:13:07,583
- Kay.
- Buddy?
378
00:13:07,585 --> 00:13:09,986
- Don't get mad. [Laughs]
- I won't.
379
00:13:14,590 --> 00:13:17,459
[Door clicks open and shut]
380
00:13:22,434 --> 00:13:25,401
Hey! Are you... are you serious?
381
00:13:25,403 --> 00:13:27,000
I was just about to go
get lunch for everybody.
382
00:13:27,072 --> 00:13:28,773
Get back inside right now.
383
00:13:36,585 --> 00:13:38,017
Just remember, you know the case.
384
00:13:38,019 --> 00:13:39,419
- Don't be nervous.
- I'm not nervous.
385
00:13:39,421 --> 00:13:40,954
Oh, I thought I saw you laughing.
386
00:13:40,956 --> 00:13:42,737
It's a little joke. You can laugh at it.
387
00:13:42,739 --> 00:13:46,359
Very little. Don't worry. I got it.
388
00:13:46,361 --> 00:13:49,496
Mr. Stoller, I'm Micah.
I'll be representing you today.
389
00:13:49,498 --> 00:13:51,331
You look just like my daughter.
390
00:13:51,333 --> 00:13:52,406
Thank you. Now, there are...
391
00:13:52,408 --> 00:13:54,574
You'll make sure I get
to see her again soon, right?
392
00:13:54,770 --> 00:13:57,238
I'm not sure if the foster home
comes with a ramp.
393
00:13:57,240 --> 00:13:59,695
I'm... sorry?
394
00:14:00,889 --> 00:14:03,757
- Um...
- Counselor?
395
00:14:07,250 --> 00:14:08,883
So are we ready here?
396
00:14:08,985 --> 00:14:11,469
- Could I have a copy of that bench brief?
- Miss?
397
00:14:11,570 --> 00:14:14,022
You do not address
opposing council directly.
398
00:14:14,024 --> 00:14:15,557
You ask through the court.
399
00:14:15,559 --> 00:14:17,258
Right, right. Sorry.
400
00:14:17,260 --> 00:14:19,761
Stand.
401
00:14:19,763 --> 00:14:22,631
- If the court pleases itself...
- If the court what?
402
00:14:22,633 --> 00:14:27,402
If the court pleases itself... oh, oh.
403
00:14:27,404 --> 00:14:31,016
[Laughs] Excuse me. Ooh, sorry.
404
00:14:31,275 --> 00:14:32,407
[Coughs] Ooh.
405
00:14:32,409 --> 00:14:34,442
Would the court
please ask opposing counsel
406
00:14:34,444 --> 00:14:37,102
for a copy of the bench brief?
407
00:14:37,181 --> 00:14:41,750
"If the court pleases itself."
Can you imagine?
408
00:14:41,752 --> 00:14:43,620
Nervous?
409
00:14:47,458 --> 00:14:51,294
Let's start by going around
and checking in.
410
00:14:51,296 --> 00:14:53,796
I see some new faces here today.
411
00:14:53,798 --> 00:14:55,500
How about you, Nina?
412
00:14:56,167 --> 00:14:57,667
Wha... oh, no. I'm sorry.
413
00:14:57,669 --> 00:14:59,569
I'm just here to make sure
that Diamond completes
414
00:14:59,571 --> 00:15:01,771
- the class, so...
- Nina, everyone talks here.
415
00:15:01,773 --> 00:15:05,308
Okay, I just... I... I don't have
any anger issues, so...
416
00:15:05,310 --> 00:15:08,745
You seemed angry
when we were talking earlier.
417
00:15:08,747 --> 00:15:11,883
No, no, that... that...
I don't think that was anger.
418
00:15:11,884 --> 00:15:13,250
What was that?
419
00:15:13,252 --> 00:15:16,887
That was just, like,
a brief feeling of annoyance,
420
00:15:16,889 --> 00:15:19,523
hostility, a little bit of rage,
421
00:15:19,525 --> 00:15:21,680
just a tinge of hatred, but, no.
422
00:15:21,795 --> 00:15:24,662
Has your anger
ever hurt your relationships
423
00:15:24,664 --> 00:15:27,565
or affected your work, cost you a job?
424
00:15:27,567 --> 00:15:29,992
- Nope, nope, nope.
- No? Mm-mm?
425
00:15:30,270 --> 00:15:31,669
- Mm.
- Mm.
426
00:15:31,671 --> 00:15:33,705
Well, I mean, once I... I did... I had,
427
00:15:33,707 --> 00:15:35,373
like, a tiny meltdown.
428
00:15:35,375 --> 00:15:38,843
I broke some things, and I got fired.
429
00:15:38,845 --> 00:15:40,912
But, uh, I mean, that happens, right?
430
00:15:40,914 --> 00:15:42,614
Thanks, Nina. That was a...
431
00:15:42,616 --> 00:15:44,864
I mean, but do any of you guys
ever think that that's a little unfair?
432
00:15:44,866 --> 00:15:47,319
Like, I mean, 'cause I worked
so hard to get to where I was.
433
00:15:47,321 --> 00:15:51,123
And then with one little
freak-out, it's all gone.
434
00:15:51,125 --> 00:15:54,593
My loft, my job, my daily Saengseon Hoe.
435
00:15:54,595 --> 00:15:56,762
I just... I don't need to... just forget it.
436
00:15:56,764 --> 00:15:59,198
- It doesn't matter.
- Great share, Nina.
437
00:15:59,200 --> 00:16:01,200
- Thanks.
- So does any...
438
00:16:01,202 --> 00:16:04,871
It is so hard to forget it,
though. It's like...
439
00:16:08,009 --> 00:16:10,542
We will then highlight the accuser's
440
00:16:10,544 --> 00:16:13,006
own history of abuse... [laughing]
441
00:16:13,114 --> 00:16:16,082
And the lasting ramifications it may...
442
00:16:16,084 --> 00:16:17,951
Excuse me, Counselor.
443
00:16:17,953 --> 00:16:19,912
[Exhales]
444
00:16:20,622 --> 00:16:23,756
And analysis
of the multiple stab wounds...
445
00:16:23,758 --> 00:16:25,897
[Laughing] The defendant received.
446
00:16:25,961 --> 00:16:27,327
What is going on?
447
00:16:27,329 --> 00:16:29,563
His face heavily bludgeoned. [Laughing]
448
00:16:29,565 --> 00:16:31,898
Okay, Your Honor, members of the jury...
449
00:16:31,900 --> 00:16:33,200
Thank you, Counselor...
450
00:16:33,202 --> 00:16:35,491
The defense finds
these accusations laughable.
451
00:16:35,538 --> 00:16:38,072
What we intend to prove is that
the accuser's own history
452
00:16:38,074 --> 00:16:40,574
of violence, coupled with
the injuries sustained
453
00:16:40,576 --> 00:16:42,910
in the fight, would suggest
that our client, Mr. Stoller,
454
00:16:42,912 --> 00:16:44,256
was not an aggressor.
455
00:16:45,748 --> 00:16:48,186
On the contrary, he acted in self-defense,
456
00:16:48,256 --> 00:16:51,619
- per criminal code, uh...
- 3470.
457
00:16:51,621 --> 00:16:54,428
3470. Thank you.
458
00:16:55,725 --> 00:16:58,059
Now, take you back to that day...
459
00:16:58,061 --> 00:17:00,195
So that's where my fear
460
00:17:00,197 --> 00:17:03,280
of full-body Halloween costumes
comes from.
461
00:17:05,202 --> 00:17:08,503
[Light applause]
462
00:17:08,505 --> 00:17:11,295
Thanks for all of that. Next, Diamond.
463
00:17:11,375 --> 00:17:14,543
Oh, hi, um, name's Diamond,
464
00:17:14,545 --> 00:17:16,211
because I have a hardness of ten.
465
00:17:16,213 --> 00:17:17,546
[Laughter]
466
00:17:17,548 --> 00:17:20,295
I mean, I'm kind of a softie
inside, you know?
467
00:17:20,987 --> 00:17:22,251
- Sure.
- I mean, I do get angry.
468
00:17:22,253 --> 00:17:23,419
- Sure.
- I mean, I do.
469
00:17:23,421 --> 00:17:24,887
And that's just because I'm alone.
470
00:17:24,889 --> 00:17:28,475
And, you know, no one really
looks out for me, you know?
471
00:17:28,493 --> 00:17:32,061
Like, never.
I... no one ever looks out for me.
472
00:17:32,063 --> 00:17:34,030
I'm just kind of like
Tom Hanks on that island
473
00:17:34,032 --> 00:17:35,832
but with no volleyball.
474
00:17:35,834 --> 00:17:37,467
- Aw, man.
- Hold it together, brother.
475
00:17:37,469 --> 00:17:39,022
It's gonna be all right,
man, keep your head up.
476
00:17:39,138 --> 00:17:40,504
Are you kidding me right now?
477
00:17:40,506 --> 00:17:43,140
No one ever looks out for you? No one?
478
00:17:43,142 --> 00:17:46,576
Uh, who got you the great plea deal?
479
00:17:46,578 --> 00:17:48,111
Who got you a job offer?
480
00:17:48,113 --> 00:17:51,678
Who got you into this class? All me.
481
00:17:51,709 --> 00:17:53,943
I let you mug me. I gave you a lunch.
482
00:17:53,953 --> 00:17:55,085
I gave you a shirt.
483
00:17:55,087 --> 00:17:57,754
I mean, it was a real boring shirt.
484
00:17:57,756 --> 00:18:00,224
- It wasn't sexy.
- Was it green?
485
00:18:00,226 --> 00:18:00,951
It was nothing spectacular.
486
00:18:01,027 --> 00:18:02,893
I have spent the past 24 hours
babysitting you
487
00:18:02,895 --> 00:18:05,062
for less than what a babysitter gets paid.
488
00:18:05,064 --> 00:18:06,397
Sh... what do you think this is?
489
00:18:06,399 --> 00:18:08,933
- The Blind Side?
- Please, Sandra Bullock.
490
00:18:08,935 --> 00:18:11,802
- Teach me how to use a fork.
- And how to sleep in a bed.
491
00:18:11,804 --> 00:18:12,973
I was helping you.
492
00:18:12,975 --> 00:18:15,940
We're not here to make you
feel better about yourself.
493
00:18:15,942 --> 00:18:17,809
Wait a minute, wait a minute.
Did you even know
494
00:18:17,811 --> 00:18:20,378
that she even gave me the Cosby speech?
495
00:18:20,380 --> 00:18:22,436
[All shouting]
496
00:18:22,449 --> 00:18:24,082
Okay, you know what?
That's it. That's it.
497
00:18:24,084 --> 00:18:26,585
I'm so sorry that I tried to help you,
498
00:18:26,587 --> 00:18:28,420
that I tried to fix things for you, okay?
499
00:18:28,422 --> 00:18:30,467
I'm so sorry. And you know what, Ruth?
500
00:18:30,557 --> 00:18:33,558
I don't have an anger problem, all right?
501
00:18:33,560 --> 00:18:35,959
Ugh! Son of a bitch!
502
00:18:36,531 --> 00:18:38,265
All: Oh!
503
00:18:41,269 --> 00:18:44,871
I'm actually having a bit
of a flashback right now.
504
00:18:44,873 --> 00:18:48,941
So this class is every Thursday.
Is that right?
505
00:18:48,943 --> 00:18:49,810
Okay.
506
00:18:51,680 --> 00:18:53,513
No, don't... don't... don't throw it away.
507
00:18:53,515 --> 00:18:54,681
That's it. It's over.
508
00:18:54,683 --> 00:18:56,249
Hank is gonna steal the ball right now.
509
00:18:56,251 --> 00:18:57,617
No, what?
510
00:18:57,619 --> 00:19:01,121
He wears 44, which numerology
tells us means "balance."
511
00:19:01,123 --> 00:19:03,256
So in the first period,
he had the ball stolen from him,
512
00:19:03,258 --> 00:19:04,758
remember, so...
513
00:19:04,760 --> 00:19:06,760
- Hank steals the ball.
- Holy crap!
514
00:19:06,762 --> 00:19:08,670
- Who are you?
- It's easy.
515
00:19:08,731 --> 00:19:11,765
Hey, I should've given you more credit.
516
00:19:11,767 --> 00:19:13,975
And I'm sorry I acted
like a giant butthole.
517
00:19:13,977 --> 00:19:15,042
Mm.
518
00:19:15,070 --> 00:19:16,470
Hey, you're gonna make a great lawyer.
519
00:19:16,472 --> 00:19:18,205
And don't worry about the courtroom stuff.
520
00:19:18,207 --> 00:19:20,483
That was hard for everybody.
Well, except me.
521
00:19:20,543 --> 00:19:22,509
I used to sweat. Larry used to puke.
522
00:19:22,511 --> 00:19:23,510
And he still does.
523
00:19:23,512 --> 00:19:25,145
Micah, you're gonna be fine.
524
00:19:25,147 --> 00:19:26,873
Thanks, Phil.
525
00:19:28,684 --> 00:19:31,709
- Hey.
- What... what happened?
526
00:19:31,821 --> 00:19:33,655
Proof of job application, start papers
527
00:19:33,657 --> 00:19:35,156
for anger management... I did it.
528
00:19:35,158 --> 00:19:36,858
Diamond's out. No sweat.
529
00:19:36,860 --> 00:19:39,360
- Well, maybe a little sweat.
- All right.
530
00:19:39,362 --> 00:19:41,272
Got to say, though, Whitley,
I'm impressed.
531
00:19:41,565 --> 00:19:42,731
I'm impressed.
532
00:19:42,733 --> 00:19:45,700
And a bet is a bet. You win 10 bucks.
533
00:19:45,702 --> 00:19:48,503
But you were right. The system's broken.
534
00:19:48,505 --> 00:19:50,397
So you know what?
535
00:19:50,441 --> 00:19:51,640
We both win.
536
00:19:51,642 --> 00:19:53,308
No, we both lose.
537
00:19:53,310 --> 00:19:55,334
Do you understand how money works?
538
00:19:55,917 --> 00:19:59,170
Okay, we'll get two whiskeys
and some tape.
539
00:20:01,090 --> 00:20:02,990
Here we go. Last of theSaengseon Hoe.
540
00:20:02,992 --> 00:20:04,425
- Mmm.
- [Laughs]
541
00:20:04,427 --> 00:20:06,560
Hey, thanks for hooking me up
with this gig, all right?
542
00:20:06,562 --> 00:20:08,128
- I mean, you know...
- Yeah.
543
00:20:08,130 --> 00:20:10,164
Oh, oh, oh!
544
00:20:10,166 --> 00:20:11,498
Sorry about that. [Laughs]
545
00:20:11,500 --> 00:20:12,866
Five-second rule.
546
00:20:12,868 --> 00:20:14,802
- Oh.
- Oh, you ain't paid for that.
547
00:20:14,804 --> 00:20:17,104
What's... what's that
doing in there? [Laughs]
548
00:20:17,106 --> 00:20:19,139
I don't think I want the fish anymore.
549
00:20:19,141 --> 00:20:22,209
Uh, okay, well, I'ma still
have to charge you for this.
550
00:20:22,211 --> 00:20:25,069
Okay. [Inhales] Oh.
551
00:20:25,148 --> 00:20:26,981
Anger management techniques.
552
00:20:26,983 --> 00:20:28,482
You're on a beach.
553
00:20:28,484 --> 00:20:30,384
- It's warm...
- Hmm.
554
00:20:30,386 --> 00:20:31,986
And this big-titty chick is kissing you
555
00:20:31,988 --> 00:20:33,955
- all on your...
- Give me the fish.
556
00:20:33,957 --> 00:21:01,850
I am gonna go make a cat very happy.
557
00:21:01,900 --> 00:21:06,450
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