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1
00:00:00,599 --> 00:00:02,717
Dudley,
one for the Bleachers.
2
00:00:03,867 --> 00:00:05,904
No, no, no.
3
00:00:06,417 --> 00:00:08,853
Ginger one... come on.
Right down third base.
4
00:00:08,889 --> 00:00:10,089
You can do it.
5
00:00:13,069 --> 00:00:15,480
Angel, bunt. Do something.
I don't care.
6
00:00:18,088 --> 00:00:19,325
Excellent.
7
00:00:19,360 --> 00:00:21,898
Finally, I'm done.
We can go home now.
8
00:00:21,932 --> 00:00:24,570
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
No. Hold up.
9
00:00:24,604 --> 00:00:25,939
We are going around again.
10
00:00:25,973 --> 00:00:27,201
We're batting around again.
11
00:00:27,208 --> 00:00:30,242
Cannon, we've been doing
batting practice for two hours.
12
00:00:30,276 --> 00:00:32,176
Right.
I have a blister,
13
00:00:32,210 --> 00:00:34,676
and it's affecting
my "around the world" snap.
14
00:00:34,684 --> 00:00:36,442
Well, here's to your
"around the world" snap.
15
00:00:36,449 --> 00:00:40,304
We're all gonna bat again until
one of you hit it out of the infield.
16
00:00:40,305 --> 00:00:42,786
Hit the outfield grass,
just one of you.
17
00:00:42,820 --> 00:00:46,535
Every other team in the league
is playing nine guys in the infield.
18
00:00:46,574 --> 00:00:48,921
They're taking advantage
of your weakness.
19
00:00:48,922 --> 00:00:50,222
Well, it's not gonna be long
20
00:00:50,223 --> 00:00:52,246
before they just go to your
dugout and steal your women.
21
00:00:52,247 --> 00:00:56,297
- What women?
- My point exactly. Now let's go!
22
00:00:56,331 --> 00:00:59,196
Batter up. Top of the order,
whoever that is.
23
00:01:00,662 --> 00:01:02,297
Hey, Junior!
24
00:01:02,298 --> 00:01:04,592
You want to join us over here
or what?
25
00:01:04,849 --> 00:01:06,711
I'm busy!
26
00:01:08,448 --> 00:01:12,018
Standing over there,
wagging your hair
27
00:01:12,052 --> 00:01:15,829
There's something
that you do
28
00:01:15,874 --> 00:01:19,638
Long and lean,
a rock-'n'-roll machine
29
00:01:19,657 --> 00:01:22,390
I just want to get with you
30
00:01:22,725 --> 00:01:25,752
That ass is so hard, you could crack
other hard asses off it.
31
00:01:26,362 --> 00:01:28,029
Crack, crack.
32
00:01:28,064 --> 00:01:30,975
Yeah, but he's really more my speed.
33
00:01:30,976 --> 00:01:32,576
Oh, really?
34
00:01:32,577 --> 00:01:34,176
You make me hot
35
00:01:34,368 --> 00:01:36,802
- Okay.
- Hmm.
36
00:01:36,803 --> 00:01:40,057
His name is Jack. He's our
liquor rep at the pizza place.
37
00:01:40,072 --> 00:01:43,006
Well, everyone needs
a slump Buster now and then.
38
00:01:43,007 --> 00:01:44,576
Who am I to judge?
39
00:01:44,610 --> 00:01:47,879
Yeah, he's really channeling a whole
Beastie Boys "sabotage" thing.
40
00:01:47,913 --> 00:01:49,280
And I like it.
41
00:01:49,314 --> 00:01:51,481
I'm feeling something
about this guy.
42
00:01:51,516 --> 00:01:52,649
Hmm.
43
00:01:52,683 --> 00:01:55,083
- I think you should ask him out.
- Oh, wow.
44
00:01:55,084 --> 00:01:57,337
I haven't asked out a guy
since I got pregnant and said,
45
00:01:57,350 --> 00:01:58,917
"Hey, maybe we should go out
and talk."
46
00:01:59,055 --> 00:02:00,822
Come on, darling.
Ask him out.
47
00:02:00,856 --> 00:02:01,823
With a mustache
like that,
48
00:02:01,857 --> 00:02:03,090
he's bound to be
bringing the thunder.
49
00:02:03,125 --> 00:02:04,725
Oh, I want to, Lulu.
50
00:02:04,760 --> 00:02:07,094
But I don't know.
Just not ready.
51
00:02:08,601 --> 00:02:12,610
Well, if not you,
me and the ladies are going in.
52
00:02:12,611 --> 00:02:14,011
Hmm? Mm-hmm.
53
00:02:14,163 --> 00:02:16,203
You make me hot
54
00:02:16,335 --> 00:02:18,268
You make me hot
55
00:02:18,303 --> 00:02:20,937
You make me hot
56
00:02:20,971 --> 00:02:24,407
Oh, hey, Terry. Jack, you know Terry.
Terry's poor.
57
00:02:24,418 --> 00:02:26,185
- Dick gets his hair highlighted.
- Terry's poor.
58
00:02:26,220 --> 00:02:27,623
- Dick's afraid of bees.
- Well, you know what?
59
00:02:27,639 --> 00:02:29,926
Nothing that small should be
imbued with that much power.
60
00:02:29,927 --> 00:02:31,736
Jack, can I...
Talk to you?
61
00:02:31,748 --> 00:02:34,527
- Sure.
- Not... Here.
62
00:02:34,938 --> 00:02:38,174
I have a...
Um... Bathroom question.
63
00:02:38,209 --> 00:02:40,715
Front to back, Terry.
Always front to back.
64
00:02:40,730 --> 00:02:43,426
Dick wears spanx and tries
to pass them off as bicycle shorts.
65
00:02:43,452 --> 00:02:46,863
No, he doesn't, actually. That's a lie.
Where you guys going?
66
00:02:46,864 --> 00:02:49,781
So, uh, Jack,
I've been watchingng you
67
00:02:49,796 --> 00:02:52,857
at the pizza place,
and I think you're nice.
68
00:02:52,892 --> 00:02:55,883
And I think I'm nice.
And I think we'd be nice together.
69
00:02:55,907 --> 00:02:57,475
Do you like food?
I like food.
70
00:02:57,509 --> 00:02:59,878
Of course you like food.
You'd die without food.
71
00:02:59,912 --> 00:03:01,479
I'm... Dying right now.
72
00:03:01,514 --> 00:03:04,983
- Do you want to have dinner sometime?
- How about tonight?
73
00:03:05,018 --> 00:03:06,785
- Okay.
- Okay.
74
00:03:06,819 --> 00:03:09,769
- I will call you later.
- Sounds good.
75
00:03:10,523 --> 00:03:12,424
Call who later?
Ugh.
76
00:03:12,459 --> 00:03:13,726
Who the hell was that?
77
00:03:13,760 --> 00:03:15,439
None of
your damn business.
78
00:03:15,455 --> 00:03:17,794
- Why aren't you with the kids?
- Oh, yeah, about that.
79
00:03:17,798 --> 00:03:20,533
- How many did we start off with today?
- 12.
80
00:03:20,568 --> 00:03:21,936
So, not 8?
81
00:03:23,314 --> 00:03:25,933
- We switched uniforms!
- We switched uniforms!
82
00:03:26,008 --> 00:03:27,375
Hmm.
83
00:03:27,409 --> 00:03:29,377
I'm back
84
00:03:30,438 --> 00:03:33,496
Season 1, Episode 5
"She. Could. Go. All. The. Way!"
85
00:03:34,114 --> 00:03:37,114
Sync & corrections: Reef
www.addic7ed.com
86
00:03:38,575 --> 00:03:39,876
I'm back
87
00:03:40,924 --> 00:03:44,150
Great, Jack. So, I will see you
at sidecar at 9:00.
88
00:03:44,166 --> 00:03:46,460
- Sounds good.
- I...
89
00:03:46,495 --> 00:03:48,796
Oh, uh, wait a second.
90
00:03:48,830 --> 00:03:50,331
Hey, I'm on the phone!
91
00:03:50,365 --> 00:03:52,733
- Who is this?
- Who do you think it is?
92
00:03:52,767 --> 00:03:54,401
- Hello?
- Dad, I'm on the phone.
93
00:03:54,435 --> 00:03:57,343
- Hang up the phone.
- Terry? Terry, how did you get on here?
94
00:03:57,359 --> 00:03:59,337
- You have two phones.
- I do?
95
00:03:59,372 --> 00:04:01,572
Okay. Jack, I am...
96
00:04:01,606 --> 00:04:04,007
Dad, hang up the phone.
97
00:04:05,309 --> 00:04:08,082
Why don't you just come
in the other room and talk to me?
98
00:04:08,108 --> 00:04:09,464
Hang up the phone.
99
00:04:09,465 --> 00:04:11,823
Jack, I am
so sorry about that.
100
00:04:11,846 --> 00:04:13,751
- It's okay. You...
- Hello?
101
00:04:13,777 --> 00:04:15,322
- Jack?
- Okay, I'm just gonna...
102
00:04:15,323 --> 00:04:16,405
- Terry?
- It's...
103
00:04:16,428 --> 00:04:17,601
- Dad!
- Hello?
104
00:04:17,609 --> 00:04:19,650
- Ugh, Jack.
- No, it's still me.
105
00:04:19,685 --> 00:04:21,085
Hang up the phone!
106
00:04:23,923 --> 00:04:27,927
Hey, hey, hey. What's the matter?
You got a face on your face.
107
00:04:27,961 --> 00:04:31,330
There's this kid, and he cheated
off my test today at school.
108
00:04:31,365 --> 00:04:32,732
- Did he pay you?
- No.
109
00:04:32,766 --> 00:04:34,734
- Did you smack him in the mouth?
- No.
110
00:04:34,745 --> 00:04:37,670
- What did you do to this kid?
- I didn't really do anything.
111
00:04:37,704 --> 00:04:39,338
I didn't want to cause
any problems.
112
00:04:39,373 --> 00:04:41,181
- Uh-huh.
- Hey, buddy.
113
00:04:41,204 --> 00:04:43,375
- Hey, Terry.
- I didn't know you were home.
114
00:04:43,409 --> 00:04:46,432
Anyway, I have to stop by work
and pick up my check.
115
00:04:46,433 --> 00:04:49,080
Danny needs some new shoes.
I need you to take him to the store.
116
00:04:49,081 --> 00:04:50,989
Doesn't sound like
something I'm doing.
117
00:04:50,995 --> 00:04:55,612
I got a couple episodes of "Hart to Hart"
on tape, and Stefanie Powers...
118
00:04:55,613 --> 00:04:57,932
Dad, help me out.
Help out your grandson.
119
00:04:57,948 --> 00:05:00,392
- What's that?
- Your grandson.
120
00:05:01,594 --> 00:05:04,896
I will, uh...
I will straighten Danny boy out.
121
00:05:04,897 --> 00:05:08,104
You, though... You will bring me home
pizza from the place you work at.
122
00:05:08,105 --> 00:05:09,329
I'm gonna be home late.
123
00:05:09,330 --> 00:05:11,736
Why? What would be delaying
my food?
124
00:05:11,770 --> 00:05:13,879
- I have a date.
- What?
125
00:05:13,897 --> 00:05:16,608
Danny, it is just one date.
It doesn't mean anything.
126
00:05:16,642 --> 00:05:18,938
- That's fine. Have fun.
- Nice.
127
00:05:18,939 --> 00:05:21,562
- I happen to hate this guy.
- You don't even know him.
128
00:05:21,563 --> 00:05:23,298
And you've never liked
anyone I've dated.
129
00:05:23,316 --> 00:05:25,516
No, no, no, no, no.
T-the kid with the limp.
130
00:05:25,517 --> 00:05:27,940
You gave him that limp.
You hit him with the car.
131
00:05:27,941 --> 00:05:30,956
- Bumped him.
- I am a grown woman. Butt out.
132
00:05:30,990 --> 00:05:32,224
I don't like this guy.
133
00:05:32,258 --> 00:05:33,692
Sneakers.
134
00:05:33,727 --> 00:05:35,128
I love you, Danny.
135
00:05:36,100 --> 00:05:37,905
Father...
136
00:05:38,984 --> 00:05:40,214
"Father!"
137
00:05:43,666 --> 00:05:45,937
So?
What do you think?
138
00:05:45,971 --> 00:05:48,573
Darling, you look gorgeous.
Very sexy.
139
00:05:48,607 --> 00:05:51,877
Does it say, "I want to sleep with you on
the first date but I don't do this often"?
140
00:05:51,878 --> 00:05:53,312
Oh, wow, darling.
How long has it been?
141
00:05:53,325 --> 00:05:55,882
- Was Bush still around?
- No. Obama.
142
00:05:55,917 --> 00:05:57,651
You thought
I meant the president.
143
00:05:57,686 --> 00:05:59,320
You are so cute.
144
00:05:59,354 --> 00:06:01,088
You know...
145
00:06:01,122 --> 00:06:03,157
I think I might like
this guy.
146
00:06:03,191 --> 00:06:05,759
Well, then sleep with him,
darling. Men love that.
147
00:06:05,760 --> 00:06:08,502
So, the rules about waiting
and all that, they're gone?
148
00:06:08,510 --> 00:06:10,497
Look, darling, the main thing
here is to be honest.
149
00:06:10,531 --> 00:06:12,188
Honest.
I can do that.
150
00:06:12,212 --> 00:06:15,568
Yeah, well, unless he asks about your age
or the number of men you've slept with.
151
00:06:15,569 --> 00:06:18,204
- Then you round down.
- Well, I've only been with two.
152
00:06:18,239 --> 00:06:20,573
- Round up.
- Okay.
153
00:06:20,608 --> 00:06:23,409
So, I guess you can say
that's why the Cannon
154
00:06:23,410 --> 00:06:25,737
has been
banned from Canada.
155
00:06:25,744 --> 00:06:29,649
Typically, a very tolerant country.
But whatever. He sounds like fun.
156
00:06:29,650 --> 00:06:31,818
- Kind of need to meet him.
- Uh, let me stop you right there.
157
00:06:31,819 --> 00:06:34,740
You will not be meeting my dad.
Nothing against you.
158
00:06:34,741 --> 00:06:36,922
He's been a little
overprotective since my divorce.
159
00:06:36,923 --> 00:06:38,658
- Divorce?
- Let me stop you right there.
160
00:06:38,659 --> 00:06:41,282
I am divorced,
which is why I live with my dad.
161
00:06:41,283 --> 00:06:44,398
It's not something I hoped for, but
at least my son has a man in his life.
162
00:06:44,399 --> 00:06:46,032
- Your son?
- Let me stop you right there.
163
00:06:46,033 --> 00:06:48,924
Yes, I have a son.
I got pregnant when I was 20,
164
00:06:48,925 --> 00:06:52,367
and I am telling you
way too much for a first date.
165
00:06:52,373 --> 00:06:55,745
Look, I just want to be
totally honest with you.
166
00:06:55,746 --> 00:06:57,061
Let me stop you
right there.
167
00:06:57,077 --> 00:06:59,732
Despite your apparent inability
to edit yourself
168
00:06:59,733 --> 00:07:03,635
and some really sizeable baggage,
I really appreciate the honesty.
169
00:07:03,658 --> 00:07:05,572
- Hmm.
- I also think you're really beautiful.
170
00:07:05,573 --> 00:07:08,288
- Point for you.
- And if we're being honest,
171
00:07:08,322 --> 00:07:10,715
I might have just a little bit
of baggage myself.
172
00:07:10,716 --> 00:07:15,437
I may have quit my job one summer
and gone on the road following...
173
00:07:15,438 --> 00:07:16,615
Coldplay.
174
00:07:16,616 --> 00:07:17,965
- Check.
- Point for you.
175
00:07:17,999 --> 00:07:23,169
Coldplay confessions aside,
I'm just a regular guy who really...
176
00:07:23,278 --> 00:07:26,000
- Really likes you.
- Yeah?
177
00:07:26,063 --> 00:07:27,730
And Jamiroquai.
178
00:07:28,000 --> 00:07:31,074
Subtitles downloaded from www.OpenSubtitles.org
179
00:07:33,848 --> 00:07:37,718
- How those feel?
- Great. They're expensive.
180
00:07:37,752 --> 00:07:40,721
- Not a problem.
- Look, here's what I want you to do.
181
00:07:40,755 --> 00:07:43,190
Keep your head up,
be real confident,
182
00:07:43,224 --> 00:07:44,591
and when I say go...
183
00:07:44,626 --> 00:07:48,161
You walk out that door
with them on your feet.
184
00:07:48,195 --> 00:07:51,330
What?
You mean steal them?
185
00:07:51,365 --> 00:07:53,766
I mean go. I don't want you
to get arrested.
186
00:07:53,801 --> 00:07:55,348
Now let's go.
187
00:07:56,303 --> 00:07:59,105
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Wait, wait.
188
00:08:01,409 --> 00:08:02,943
Now.
189
00:08:06,314 --> 00:08:08,448
Excuse me. Sir?
190
00:08:08,482 --> 00:08:10,617
Hey. Hey, stop!
191
00:08:13,812 --> 00:08:15,412
Just watch this.
192
00:08:16,701 --> 00:08:20,493
See? You can beat any security
with a fork and a magnet.
193
00:08:20,494 --> 00:08:22,283
Cannon, we shouldn't have
stolen those shoes.
194
00:08:22,284 --> 00:08:24,585
What's the "we" crap?
"We"? No, you.
195
00:08:24,619 --> 00:08:26,006
Yeah. Anyway, look...
196
00:08:26,020 --> 00:08:28,590
The Chinamen people,
they make these for 3 cents.
197
00:08:28,591 --> 00:08:30,714
The store sells them for what?
$100?
198
00:08:30,725 --> 00:08:32,332
That's stealing,
you know.
199
00:08:32,355 --> 00:08:35,034
I mean, we're basically paying
3 cents under wholesale.
200
00:08:35,035 --> 00:08:37,310
Magnet, fork... done.
Right?
201
00:08:37,341 --> 00:08:39,499
"Thanks,
grandpa Cannon."
202
00:08:39,534 --> 00:08:43,127
You're welcome, son.
Oh, you're welcome.
203
00:08:43,155 --> 00:08:44,988
You're welcome.
204
00:08:48,009 --> 00:08:52,479
- I guess this is good night.
- I wish it didn't have to end.
205
00:08:52,482 --> 00:08:54,983
- Me neither.
- So, why did you bring me home?
206
00:08:55,012 --> 00:08:56,848
I was being a gentleman.
Why did you let me?
207
00:08:56,885 --> 00:08:58,619
Ugh. I'm new at this.
208
00:08:58,653 --> 00:09:03,184
I would love to invite you in, but
my 73-year-old suitcase is inside.
209
00:09:03,212 --> 00:09:04,466
Hmm.
210
00:09:04,489 --> 00:09:07,059
- We could go someplace else.
- Yes, please.
211
00:09:07,094 --> 00:09:10,263
No one's going nowhere!
I'm getting the hose! A pipe!
212
00:09:10,297 --> 00:09:12,385
And now
the night has ended.
213
00:09:12,386 --> 00:09:14,263
- And a bag of nickels!
- I'm sorry, Jack.
214
00:09:14,286 --> 00:09:16,867
- Terry, it is okay.
- I'm getting a bat!
215
00:09:16,868 --> 00:09:18,738
- I'm not going anywhere.
- And a sword!
216
00:09:18,739 --> 00:09:22,531
- And I'm not seeing anyone else.
- An AK-47!
217
00:09:22,543 --> 00:09:25,612
- Things will happen.
- A bomb! I'm gonna blow your ass up!
218
00:09:25,646 --> 00:09:28,514
- You look gorgeous.
- Thank you.
219
00:09:28,549 --> 00:09:30,482
Get off my damn lawn!
220
00:09:32,836 --> 00:09:34,352
What was that?
221
00:09:34,387 --> 00:09:36,856
Were you sitting by the door,
spying on me?
222
00:09:36,890 --> 00:09:38,436
Geez, Terry.
When did you get home?
223
00:09:38,458 --> 00:09:39,892
Why don't you
just drink your vitamin milk
224
00:09:39,927 --> 00:09:41,728
and go to bed at 8:00
like all the other seniors?
225
00:09:41,762 --> 00:09:45,139
Keep it off my perimeter.
You were un-holying my doorstep.
226
00:09:45,140 --> 00:09:47,288
A mistake
I won't make again.
227
00:09:47,335 --> 00:09:49,952
- Hey, mom. How was your date?
- It was nice.
228
00:09:49,953 --> 00:09:52,778
Hey, those sneaks look great.
How much were they?
229
00:09:52,786 --> 00:09:55,560
Uh, not much.
They... oh.
230
00:09:55,587 --> 00:09:58,230
We got it... Th-three cents
under wholesale.
231
00:09:58,245 --> 00:09:59,926
Uh, the...
a big sale?
232
00:09:59,927 --> 00:10:01,748
They were on a sale,
so...
233
00:10:01,771 --> 00:10:03,805
You know, I've got to go
do my homework.
234
00:10:06,254 --> 00:10:09,590
- Is he okay?
- No. Obviously not.
235
00:10:09,624 --> 00:10:11,525
Because you went on a date
with a loser.
236
00:10:11,559 --> 00:10:14,216
- Oh.
- Whatever that guy is... little geek.
237
00:10:16,098 --> 00:10:17,398
Obviously.
238
00:10:21,022 --> 00:10:24,039
You know, you were so good
with those sneakers yesterday,
239
00:10:24,073 --> 00:10:26,641
I think the team needs
a couple new bats.
240
00:10:26,676 --> 00:10:29,110
- How am I gonna steal...
- No, no, no. Shh, shh, shh.
241
00:10:31,347 --> 00:10:33,482
Piece of cake.
242
00:10:33,516 --> 00:10:35,270
Cannon, I don't know
why we're doing this.
243
00:10:35,271 --> 00:10:36,537
Shh, kid.
244
00:10:36,561 --> 00:10:39,421
Hey, hey. What are you
looking at, wise guy?
245
00:10:39,455 --> 00:10:42,208
You ought to be ashamed of yourself.
The kid was born with Jimmy legs.
246
00:10:42,211 --> 00:10:43,912
He ain't got
no telethon.
247
00:10:48,342 --> 00:10:49,924
So, you didn't sleep
with Jack?
248
00:10:49,925 --> 00:10:52,508
- No. I was Cannon-blocked.
- Oh.
249
00:10:52,531 --> 00:10:56,037
But it could be a good thing.
I like him, so maybe I should wait.
250
00:10:56,071 --> 00:10:58,707
Oh, no. No, darling.
You've waited long enough.
251
00:10:58,708 --> 00:11:00,348
You need to get
your leg over.
252
00:11:00,376 --> 00:11:01,576
- Tonight?
- Tonight.
253
00:11:01,577 --> 00:11:02,783
- Tonight.
- Tonight.
254
00:11:02,807 --> 00:11:04,491
- Oh, yeah.
- Whoa. You're gonna sleep with Jack?
255
00:11:04,492 --> 00:11:06,487
- How did you hear that?
- I'm standing right over there.
256
00:11:06,488 --> 00:11:09,158
And besides, when you two talk,
you yell like a couple of magpies.
257
00:11:09,261 --> 00:11:11,195
Why are you wearing
a fake mustache?
258
00:11:11,230 --> 00:11:12,954
This is not
a fake mustache.
259
00:11:13,000 --> 00:11:14,933
I got so much teste
coursing through my man veins,
260
00:11:14,967 --> 00:11:16,701
I grow these things
overnight.
261
00:11:16,736 --> 00:11:18,691
But listen to me...
you can't sleep with him.
262
00:11:18,699 --> 00:11:21,191
- He's a bad guy.
- Oh, my God.
263
00:11:21,192 --> 00:11:23,282
Coming from you,
that means less than nothing.
264
00:11:23,309 --> 00:11:25,710
Okay. You can't go out tonight
'cause, uh... You're working.
265
00:11:25,711 --> 00:11:28,446
- My shift just ended.
- Well, you got to cover for Billy.
266
00:11:28,480 --> 00:11:30,215
- I had to fire him.
- What?
267
00:11:30,249 --> 00:11:32,150
It's just not working out.
We all knew this day would come.
268
00:11:32,184 --> 00:11:34,041
- You're not fired, Billy.
- Pack it up, Billy.
269
00:11:34,042 --> 00:11:36,417
Look, I am going out
with Jack tonight, end of story.
270
00:11:36,433 --> 00:11:38,190
It is not your business
or anyone else's.
271
00:11:38,206 --> 00:11:40,031
Okay, then.
You're fired.
272
00:11:40,065 --> 00:11:42,433
No, she's not,
Freddie Mercury.
273
00:11:43,629 --> 00:11:45,029
Dang it.
274
00:11:45,064 --> 00:11:48,650
Billy, what the hell are you doing?
Get to work.
275
00:11:49,268 --> 00:11:50,667
I'm back!
276
00:11:52,905 --> 00:11:55,139
Hey, hey, hey!
Hang on!
277
00:11:55,173 --> 00:11:58,508
I almost beaned you.
What's with that stupid mustache?
278
00:11:58,543 --> 00:11:59,893
Oh, yeah.
You like it?
279
00:11:59,908 --> 00:12:01,650
No, it makes you look like
a bigger idiot.
280
00:12:01,679 --> 00:12:03,534
- That's not true. It's pretty boss, right?
- Come here.
281
00:12:03,550 --> 00:12:05,256
For like the Tom Selleck look,
it's pretty... not bad.
282
00:12:05,279 --> 00:12:06,482
Ow! Ow!
283
00:12:06,505 --> 00:12:09,485
Okay, that is what a non-manly
person would say right there.
284
00:12:09,520 --> 00:12:11,560
Is Terry home? I got...
I got to talk to her.
285
00:12:11,568 --> 00:12:12,932
No, she's not.
Neither are you.
286
00:12:12,957 --> 00:12:14,768
Hang on, hang on,
hang on, hang on!
287
00:12:14,769 --> 00:12:18,423
She's dating a bad guy, okay?
She's about to make a huge mistake.
288
00:12:18,424 --> 00:12:20,498
- Why are you telling me this?
- Because I should.
289
00:12:20,532 --> 00:12:23,567
She's gonna get hurt,
and she deserves better, so...
290
00:12:23,601 --> 00:12:26,536
If you're lying to me for any
stupid reason, I will end you.
291
00:12:26,571 --> 00:12:29,639
Okay, that's a bit extreme,
but I'm not lying.
292
00:12:29,674 --> 00:12:32,275
- I swear.
- I mean, I just can't go tell her,
293
00:12:32,310 --> 00:12:34,344
- ... "This guy's bad news."
- Right.
294
00:12:34,379 --> 00:12:37,365
And in her head, you know,
she thinks I'm an over-reactionary.
295
00:12:37,391 --> 00:12:39,468
- Imagine that.
- I guess I got to get some proof.
296
00:12:39,469 --> 00:12:44,088
Well, do it quick because tonight's
"The Night," if you know what I mean.
297
00:12:44,122 --> 00:12:45,985
You did good telling me.
298
00:12:46,016 --> 00:12:50,256
And the next time I feel like bashing
in your face, I'm not gonna do it.
299
00:12:50,279 --> 00:12:51,514
Deal.
300
00:12:51,529 --> 00:12:54,631
- You want to walk through this way?
- I don't. This is fine. See ya.
301
00:12:54,665 --> 00:12:57,534
Thanks again for dinner.
302
00:12:57,568 --> 00:13:01,104
Second date in the books.
303
00:13:01,138 --> 00:13:04,337
- Ooh! Comfy room.
- I thought it would be romantic.
304
00:13:04,363 --> 00:13:07,944
Just so you know, the last time I did
this, there were only two positions.
305
00:13:07,979 --> 00:13:11,472
- Has that changed?
- Yeah. Internet's opened up everything.
306
00:13:11,488 --> 00:13:12,748
Not everything.
307
00:13:12,783 --> 00:13:15,242
- Noted.
- Hmm.
308
00:13:15,886 --> 00:13:17,119
Mm.
309
00:13:17,543 --> 00:13:18,756
Hunter?
310
00:13:18,769 --> 00:13:22,723
Coach Terry, my parents never
showed up to get me from the library.
311
00:13:22,746 --> 00:13:25,131
They're not answering
their cellphones, either.
312
00:13:25,155 --> 00:13:28,160
Something's wrong.
You have to come get me.
313
00:13:28,161 --> 00:13:30,117
There are strangers
anywhere.
314
00:13:30,118 --> 00:13:31,400
What?
315
00:13:31,424 --> 00:13:34,089
It says "everywhere." Say it,
or you don't get the money.
316
00:13:34,097 --> 00:13:35,297
I mean...
317
00:13:35,305 --> 00:13:38,106
There are strangers everywhere.
Please come get me.
318
00:13:38,140 --> 00:13:39,908
- I'm scared.
- Okay.
319
00:13:39,942 --> 00:13:43,165
A-all right. Just stay right
there. I'm on my way, okay?
320
00:13:43,812 --> 00:13:46,621
That's what I'm talking about.
Let's hit the library.
321
00:13:46,652 --> 00:13:48,582
That was fun.
322
00:13:54,005 --> 00:13:58,509
So, I just had to pick up Hunter because
someone left him outside the library.
323
00:13:58,544 --> 00:14:01,736
These parents... all busy with
their audiobooks and gay weddings.
324
00:14:01,737 --> 00:14:04,206
So, you wouldn't know
anything about that?
325
00:14:04,339 --> 00:14:05,707
How was your night?
326
00:14:06,862 --> 00:14:08,749
We're going out again.
327
00:14:08,780 --> 00:14:10,592
This ain't over, old man.
328
00:14:14,565 --> 00:14:16,633
No, it ain't, Junior.
329
00:14:27,106 --> 00:14:29,408
Mr. Cannon?
330
00:14:29,442 --> 00:14:32,888
Why you tell us to go to batting
cage and now we in car?
331
00:14:32,889 --> 00:14:35,676
Each of you has
a particular set of skills...
332
00:14:36,067 --> 00:14:37,614
None of which is baseball.
333
00:14:37,649 --> 00:14:41,751
Dong, you handle the video
because your people love cameras.
334
00:14:41,786 --> 00:14:44,829
- Fat kid, you obviously have lunch.
- Check.
335
00:14:44,830 --> 00:14:47,211
Gingers, if things go bad here,
you're the patsies.
336
00:14:47,225 --> 00:14:48,692
- What's a patsy?
- What's a patsy?
337
00:14:48,726 --> 00:14:49,927
Perfect.
338
00:14:58,404 --> 00:15:01,305
Hey! Hey! Dong!
339
00:15:01,340 --> 00:15:03,108
Sorry, Mr. the Cannon.
340
00:15:11,818 --> 00:15:13,719
Go fast! Again! Again!
Again! Again!
341
00:15:21,379 --> 00:15:23,814
All right,
caught him in the act.
342
00:15:23,817 --> 00:15:26,500
That looks like three keys
of prime-grade horse to me.
343
00:15:26,533 --> 00:15:29,457
- Just like "The Wire."
- Yeah...
344
00:15:30,105 --> 00:15:33,240
Didn't I tell you
not to eat in the damn car?
345
00:15:33,274 --> 00:15:36,003
- You said a bad word!
- You want to hear bad words?
346
00:15:36,004 --> 00:15:38,805
Two twins got left by the side
of the road. Focus!
347
00:15:38,823 --> 00:15:40,357
Dong, you getting this?
348
00:15:48,107 --> 00:15:51,557
- Whoa. Cannon, what is that?
- Um... Exhibit "A."
349
00:15:51,591 --> 00:15:53,496
It's really
none of your concern.
350
00:15:53,497 --> 00:15:56,617
Hey, how come you didn't take me
to the batting cages with the other kids?
351
00:15:56,618 --> 00:15:58,789
You're not an idiot.
How did school go?
352
00:15:58,790 --> 00:16:00,424
- We got our tests back.
- And...?
353
00:16:00,425 --> 00:16:02,242
- I got 100.
- All right.
354
00:16:02,243 --> 00:16:04,664
What did that kid that cheated
from you... What did he get?
355
00:16:04,680 --> 00:16:05,899
100.
356
00:16:06,007 --> 00:16:08,529
- Made you feel like crap, huh?
- Kind of.
357
00:16:08,530 --> 00:16:09,803
- "Kind of"?
- Yeah. Kind of.
358
00:16:09,804 --> 00:16:11,176
- "Kind of"?
- Uh...
359
00:16:11,189 --> 00:16:13,298
Not good enough.
Go put your sweatshirt on.
360
00:16:19,472 --> 00:16:21,871
What are you looking at?
Do I know you?
361
00:16:21,890 --> 00:16:24,459
Well, I'd like to
introduce you to, uh,
362
00:16:24,493 --> 00:16:26,193
Helen Hunt
and Paul Reiser.
363
00:16:26,228 --> 00:16:28,709
Now you better get out of here
before we get Mad about You.
364
00:16:28,732 --> 00:16:31,182
Go.
Get out of here.
365
00:16:31,900 --> 00:16:35,539
- Come on, kid. We're leaving.
- No. Cannon, I can't do this.
366
00:16:35,562 --> 00:16:39,774
I'm done with it. I can't sleep.
And I'm having a nervous breakdown.
367
00:16:39,808 --> 00:16:43,177
- I haven't pooped in days.
- I said we're leaving.
368
00:16:43,212 --> 00:16:45,313
- No, we're not.
- You saying no to me?
369
00:16:45,347 --> 00:16:47,214
I'm saying no.
No more stealing.
370
00:16:47,249 --> 00:16:49,784
None. Unh-unh.
371
00:16:49,818 --> 00:16:54,021
That's great. See? That's great.
You're finally standing up for yourself.
372
00:16:54,056 --> 00:16:57,344
That's what you should have did with
that kid that was cheating off of you.
373
00:16:57,373 --> 00:17:00,494
This whole crime spree,
this was just you teaching me a lesson?
374
00:17:00,528 --> 00:17:03,163
Yeah. You can't let anybody
take advantage of you.
375
00:17:03,198 --> 00:17:05,199
We're Gannons, man.
We're leaders.
376
00:17:05,234 --> 00:17:08,302
If anybody's gonna take
advantage of anybody, it is us.
377
00:17:08,337 --> 00:17:10,109
You could have
just told me that.
378
00:17:10,124 --> 00:17:11,773
Yeah, I mean, I could
tell you a lot of things,
379
00:17:11,807 --> 00:17:13,708
but until you look it in the eye
and wash its back...
380
00:17:13,742 --> 00:17:15,946
I don't know
what that means!
381
00:17:15,971 --> 00:17:17,579
So end of the lesson.
382
00:17:18,754 --> 00:17:20,621
Come on. Hurry up.
383
00:17:20,624 --> 00:17:22,311
Cleanup in aisle 12!
384
00:17:22,349 --> 00:17:24,783
Janitorial
services to aisle 10.
385
00:17:24,818 --> 00:17:26,629
- 12!
- A-aisle 12.
386
00:17:27,122 --> 00:17:30,600
- You ready to go, beautiful?
- Just after I change, hot stuff.
387
00:17:30,608 --> 00:17:31,890
Scratch that.
388
00:17:31,925 --> 00:17:33,693
What about "babe"?
Does "babe" sound weird?
389
00:17:33,727 --> 00:17:35,929
- Not coming out of your mouth.
- Oh, yeah.
390
00:17:35,963 --> 00:17:38,206
Very good, Jack.
Very good.
391
00:17:38,229 --> 00:17:40,566
Hey, I want to introduce you
to the Cannon,
392
00:17:40,600 --> 00:17:43,369
A.K.A. The Cannon.
393
00:17:43,403 --> 00:17:46,301
I'm gonna introduce you
to a world of pain.
394
00:17:46,348 --> 00:17:48,109
- Yeah, get him! Get him!
- Dad, stop! Stop!
395
00:17:48,122 --> 00:17:50,244
You think I'm gonna let you
...You disrespect my daughter?
396
00:17:50,257 --> 00:17:52,565
You think I'm gonna let you take
advantage of her, you piece of garbage?
397
00:17:52,566 --> 00:17:54,772
- What are you talking about?
- He's a lowlife. Here.
398
00:17:54,797 --> 00:17:56,154
- Let me show you.
- Yeah.
399
00:17:56,270 --> 00:17:59,126
- I got this.
- I got him good. There he is.
400
00:17:59,149 --> 00:18:00,739
There he is, with a bunch of druggies.
401
00:18:00,764 --> 00:18:02,781
You followed him around
with a video camera?
402
00:18:02,806 --> 00:18:05,091
- What is wrong with you?
- You want to explain this, Flyboy?
403
00:18:05,116 --> 00:18:07,995
I'm hanging out with those guys
'cause I'm going to a meeting with them.
404
00:18:08,020 --> 00:18:10,547
I'm in recovery.
Five years clean this week.
405
00:18:10,829 --> 00:18:12,482
You're a quitter.
406
00:18:12,967 --> 00:18:16,527
Here... I got it on good authority
that this package had drugs in it.
407
00:18:16,552 --> 00:18:19,415
- What authority?
- The fat kid. Just like "The Wire."
408
00:18:19,440 --> 00:18:22,343
You mean the game console
I bought off of Craigslist
409
00:18:22,368 --> 00:18:23,969
because Terry mentioned
Danny wanted one?
410
00:18:23,994 --> 00:18:26,180
You're so sweet.
Sweet, my ass.
411
00:18:26,186 --> 00:18:29,639
Here's the "piece of resistance,"
the "coop de grass." Hmm?
412
00:18:29,664 --> 00:18:30,930
I thought it would be romantic.
413
00:18:30,955 --> 00:18:34,834
Who is the bimbo you're playin' headboard
hockey with in it, tell me, who?
414
00:18:35,812 --> 00:18:37,314
Dad, that'me.
415
00:18:38,766 --> 00:18:40,336
Are you happy now?
416
00:18:41,118 --> 00:18:43,706
No, no. No, I'm not.
417
00:18:43,731 --> 00:18:45,181
Look...
418
00:18:45,838 --> 00:18:48,472
I seen you, you know,
unhappy once.
419
00:18:48,497 --> 00:18:50,497
I just didn't want to see it
happen again, okay?
420
00:18:50,522 --> 00:18:53,522
I know. And I appreciate
you looking out for me, but...
421
00:18:53,523 --> 00:18:55,357
I don't need
your protection.
422
00:18:55,459 --> 00:18:58,873
In case you hadn't noticed,
I am your daughter.
423
00:18:59,288 --> 00:19:01,138
I can handle myself.
424
00:19:01,741 --> 00:19:03,307
- It was his fault.
- Not true.
425
00:19:03,332 --> 00:19:04,625
- It was his fault.
- Not true.
426
00:19:04,650 --> 00:19:06,230
And the face-bashing deal
is off.
427
00:19:06,231 --> 00:19:07,603
- We had a deal.
- There is no deal.
428
00:19:07,604 --> 00:19:08,840
- You can't take that back.
- I'm gonna get you, man.
429
00:19:08,865 --> 00:19:12,173
The face-bashing deal is off.
Just get. I'll show you a deal.
430
00:19:12,198 --> 00:19:17,145
Wow... you are amazingly well-adjusted,
considering you have him for a father.
431
00:19:17,170 --> 00:19:19,852
I never want to see
your sorry ass again, Jack.
432
00:19:19,860 --> 00:19:21,860
I can't believe
I almost slept with you.
433
00:19:21,885 --> 00:19:26,243
That was not me on that video.
I was never in room 625.
434
00:19:26,268 --> 00:19:30,101
- Then why did you tell your dad it was?
- 'Cause I didn't want to let him win.
435
00:19:30,126 --> 00:19:32,749
But he's right.
You're a bad guy and a liar.
436
00:19:32,774 --> 00:19:35,392
This is dating.
And I never lied to you.
437
00:19:35,418 --> 00:19:37,958
Yeah, actually, you did lie. You said
you weren't seeing anyone else.
438
00:19:37,983 --> 00:19:40,818
I'm not seeing her.
We're just having fun, you know?
439
00:19:40,840 --> 00:19:42,240
Like you and me.
440
00:19:42,274 --> 00:19:44,457
- "Having fun"...?
- Well...
441
00:19:44,465 --> 00:19:47,575
Ha. Right.
442
00:19:48,199 --> 00:19:49,787
You know...
443
00:19:50,037 --> 00:19:53,373
The 19-year-old me would have
slept with you anyway.
444
00:19:53,407 --> 00:19:55,341
And the 25-year-old me
would have ignored the signs
445
00:19:55,375 --> 00:19:57,766
that you were sleeping
with other women.
446
00:19:57,846 --> 00:20:00,313
But I've already done
all that.
447
00:20:00,513 --> 00:20:06,221
So now, the 32-year-old me
is just gonna do this.
448
00:20:06,970 --> 00:20:08,186
Ohh!
449
00:20:09,255 --> 00:20:10,889
I'm a Gannon.
450
00:20:10,923 --> 00:20:13,492
No one takes advantage
of me anymore.
451
00:20:13,526 --> 00:20:16,262
And I'm taking this.
452
00:20:27,105 --> 00:20:28,954
I'd like to return these.
453
00:20:28,989 --> 00:20:32,429
I stole them the other day,
and I feel terrible about it.
454
00:20:32,455 --> 00:20:34,224
That stuff isn't stolen.
455
00:20:34,227 --> 00:20:36,028
What are you talking about?
456
00:20:36,047 --> 00:20:37,895
You're the Cannon's
grandson, right?
457
00:20:37,911 --> 00:20:39,865
Before you came in,
he paid for all this.
458
00:20:39,866 --> 00:20:42,001
He told me he was, uh,
teaching you a lesson.
459
00:20:42,072 --> 00:20:43,995
He's a maniac...
460
00:20:44,015 --> 00:20:47,548
But if you still want to return them,
I can give you cash or store credit.
461
00:20:47,765 --> 00:20:49,399
Cash.
462
00:20:56,341 --> 00:20:59,587
And here endeth the lesson.
463
00:20:59,612 --> 00:21:02,612
Sync & corrections: Reef
www.addic7ed.com
464
00:21:03,000 --> 00:21:06,085
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