Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:30,764 --> 00:00:32,731
DO YOU KNOW
HOW TO LICK IT?
2
00:00:35,702 --> 00:00:43,709
[ALARM CLOCK]
3
00:00:43,711 --> 00:00:53,719
[MUSIC]
4
00:00:53,721 --> 00:01:03,495
[MUSIC]
5
00:01:03,497 --> 00:01:04,830
CRAP.
6
00:01:05,598 --> 00:01:15,607
[MUSIC]
7
00:01:15,609 --> 00:01:27,553
[MUSIC]
8
00:01:29,355 --> 00:01:31,523
YOU LEFT THE
WRONG KEY AGAIN.
9
00:01:31,525 --> 00:01:32,791
I NEED THE BIN TOMORROW.
10
00:01:32,793 --> 00:01:35,594
AND THE DRIVER SIDE
WINDOW'S FUCKED.
11
00:01:35,596 --> 00:01:36,762
NO, STEVE'S
GOT IT TOMORROW.
12
00:01:36,764 --> 00:01:39,398
YOU JUST HAVE TO
SHIMMY THE WINDOW.
13
00:01:42,702 --> 00:01:44,103
HOW'S WEDNESDAY
FOR YOU?
14
00:01:44,105 --> 00:01:45,471
I REALLY NEED
IT TOMORROW.
15
00:01:45,473 --> 00:01:47,739
PLUS, I CAN HOOK YOU
WITH THAT KARA GIRL.
16
00:01:47,741 --> 00:01:51,143
LESS PERSIAN-LOOKING
VERSION OF - WHAT'S HER NAME?
17
00:01:51,145 --> 00:01:55,714
BROWN HAIR,
KINDA "TALKS LIKE THIS"?
18
00:01:55,716 --> 00:01:57,583
I HAVE TOO
MUCH HOMEWORK.
19
00:01:57,585 --> 00:01:59,418
I'LL GET YOU
A TUTOR!
20
00:01:59,420 --> 00:02:00,719
HAVE YOU EVER
HAD SEX?
-YEAH!
21
00:02:00,721 --> 00:02:01,553
IT'S WONDERFUL!
22
00:02:01,555 --> 00:02:03,822
YEAH!
23
00:02:03,824 --> 00:02:05,891
I GOT A LITTLE BIT IN
WITH TRITON PATTY ONE NIGHT.
24
00:02:05,893 --> 00:02:08,327
BUT SHE WAS DRUNK,
I HAD A COUPLE BEERS.
25
00:02:08,329 --> 00:02:09,828
I'VE FELT GUILTY
EVER SINCE.
26
00:02:09,830 --> 00:02:11,897
PLUS, IF MY GPA
GOES BELOW 4.0,
27
00:02:11,899 --> 00:02:15,167
THEN DEAN THEATARD'S GONNA
TAKE AWAY MY SCHOLARSHIP.
28
00:02:15,169 --> 00:02:16,135
GLENN, I CAN'T.
29
00:02:16,137 --> 00:02:18,237
THEN WHO'S
GOT IT TONIGHT?
30
00:02:18,239 --> 00:02:19,905
I WILL GET
BACK TO YOU.
31
00:02:22,442 --> 00:02:23,509
DON'T SELL ME
A SOUP-SANDWICH.
32
00:02:23,511 --> 00:02:25,177
YOU SAID YOU
HATE SUNDAYS.
33
00:02:25,179 --> 00:02:26,912
I SAID I HATE
SCHOOL NIGHTS.
34
00:02:26,914 --> 00:02:28,380
YOU DON'T EVEN
LISTEN TO ME.
35
00:02:28,382 --> 00:02:29,515
YOU CAN HAVE
SUN-DAY.
36
00:02:29,517 --> 00:02:31,617
I WANT SUN-NIGHT.
37
00:02:31,619 --> 00:02:32,751
DON'T RAISE
YOUR VOICE AT ME.
38
00:02:32,753 --> 00:02:33,452
FUCK IT.
39
00:02:33,454 --> 00:02:34,286
WHATEVER.
40
00:02:34,288 --> 00:02:35,721
JUST GET ME
SUN-NIGHT.
41
00:02:37,524 --> 00:02:39,191
LET ME GET
BACK TO YOU.
42
00:02:41,361 --> 00:02:42,594
OH!
43
00:02:42,596 --> 00:02:45,164
WE'RE SURROUNDED BY A BUNCH
OF FUCKIN' THESPIANS.
44
00:02:45,166 --> 00:02:46,532
WHO'S GOING
TO CHURCH SUNDAY?
45
00:02:46,534 --> 00:02:48,901
UH, SANTA CLAUS.
46
00:02:48,903 --> 00:02:50,702
BRING THE SLEIGH
TO THE NORTH POLE.
47
00:02:50,704 --> 00:02:51,937
WHEN?
48
00:02:51,939 --> 00:02:53,338
CHRISTMAS EVE.
49
00:02:53,340 --> 00:02:54,706
LET ME GET
BACK TO YOU.
50
00:02:58,545 --> 00:03:00,312
IF I BRING THE BIN
TO THE PARTY TONIGHT,
51
00:03:00,314 --> 00:03:02,714
SAL WILL GIVE
STEVE HIS SUNDAY.
52
00:03:02,716 --> 00:03:04,550
NOW, COULD YOU DO THURSDAY
INSTEAD OF TONIGHT?
53
00:03:04,552 --> 00:03:06,518
YES, YOU SHOULD COME
TO THE PARTY
54
00:03:06,520 --> 00:03:08,387
AND YOU SHOULD
BRING YOUR VAN.
55
00:03:08,389 --> 00:03:10,322
BRIAN, I'M CONCERNED
ABOUT YOU.
56
00:03:11,524 --> 00:03:14,660
HEY, SO I'M TRYING TO MOVE
SOME STUFF AROUND
57
00:03:14,662 --> 00:03:16,828
SO YOU CAN HAVE
THE BIN TONIGHT.
58
00:03:16,830 --> 00:03:20,199
I WANNA OPEN SOME FUCKIN'
PRESENTS TONIGHT.
59
00:03:20,201 --> 00:03:21,934
SANTA CLAUS
WANTS EASTER,
60
00:03:21,936 --> 00:03:24,403
THE PILGRIM WANTS
THANKSGIVING.
61
00:03:24,405 --> 00:03:25,771
OK. OK. OK.
62
00:03:25,773 --> 00:03:26,805
KEEP ME POSTED.
63
00:03:32,478 --> 00:03:36,215
THE BIN'S AT THE PARTY
TONIGHT FOR SAL.
64
00:03:36,217 --> 00:03:38,550
WILL YOU GIVE YOUR
THURSDAY TO GLENN?
65
00:03:38,552 --> 00:03:40,686
WAS THAT SO HARD?
66
00:03:40,688 --> 00:03:43,789
ARE YOU ACTUALLY GOING TO SET
IN FOOT IN THE PARTY THIS TIME?
67
00:03:43,791 --> 00:03:44,856
LET ME GET
BACK TO YOU.
68
00:03:46,726 --> 00:03:48,894
CONFIRMING SATURDAY
AND THURSDAY.
69
00:03:48,896 --> 00:03:50,762
YOU'RE THE BEST!
70
00:03:52,498 --> 00:03:56,100
STEVE, CONFIRMING SUNDAY,
MONDAY AND FRIDAY.
71
00:04:01,608 --> 00:04:03,709
MERRY CHRISTMAS.
72
00:04:09,150 --> 00:04:10,682
[SCHOOL BELL RINGS]
73
00:04:22,962 --> 00:04:25,300
ONE MORE TARDY
AND YOU GET "REO".
74
00:04:27,500 --> 00:04:41,947
[MUSIC]
75
00:04:41,949 --> 00:04:44,883
[DOG BARKING]
76
00:04:44,885 --> 00:04:50,322
[MUSIC]
77
00:04:50,324 --> 00:04:52,557
WHEN ARE YOU COMING HOME?
78
00:04:52,559 --> 00:04:53,959
(MOM) I DON'T KNOW,
79
00:04:53,961 --> 00:04:56,995
YOUR AUNT NANCY SAID I CANSTAY AS LONG AS I NEED TO.
80
00:04:56,997 --> 00:04:59,364
I JUST WORRYABOUT YOU ALL ALONE.
81
00:04:59,366 --> 00:05:00,932
DID YOU GET THATENVELOPE I LEFT YOU?
82
00:05:00,934 --> 00:05:02,340
YEP.
83
00:05:02,360 --> 00:05:03,935
THANKS FOR THE LUNCH MONEY...
84
00:05:03,937 --> 00:05:05,737
(MOM) I'M SO PROUD OF YOU.
85
00:05:05,739 --> 00:05:07,606
YOU KNOW THAT, RIGHT?
86
00:05:07,608 --> 00:05:09,740
ARE YOU, OK?
87
00:05:09,760 --> 00:05:10,609
(MOM) YEAH I'M FINE.
88
00:05:10,611 --> 00:05:13,450
(MOM) NO, I'VE JUSTBEEN CONCERNED
89
00:05:13,470 --> 00:05:14,713
ABOUT YOU BEING ALONE...
90
00:05:14,715 --> 00:05:15,814
AND I DON'T THINKYOU SHOULD BE DOING THIS
91
00:05:15,816 --> 00:05:18,784
WHAT? I DON'T NEED
A BABYSITTER...
92
00:05:18,786 --> 00:05:20,419
(MOM)NO, BENNY'S COMING HOME.
93
00:05:20,421 --> 00:05:21,987
HE IS?
94
00:05:21,989 --> 00:05:35,934
[MUSIC]
95
00:05:43,609 --> 00:05:53,618
[MUSIC]
96
00:05:53,620 --> 00:05:58,790
[MUSIC]
97
00:06:01,994 --> 00:06:04,696
IT'S JUST A PARTY...
98
00:06:04,698 --> 00:06:08,600
RELAX...WHEW!
99
00:06:08,602 --> 00:06:18,610
[AMBIENT PARTY SOUNDS]
100
00:06:18,612 --> 00:06:28,720
[AMBIENT PARTY SOUNDS]
101
00:06:28,722 --> 00:06:46,405
[AMBIENT PARTY SOUNDS]
102
00:06:46,407 --> 00:06:48,390
THOUGHT SO.
103
00:06:48,410 --> 00:06:50,675
SHOES OFF.
104
00:06:50,677 --> 00:06:54,413
NEW SALVAGED
DRIFTWOOD FLOOR.
105
00:06:54,415 --> 00:06:55,881
COPS OUTSIDE?
106
00:06:55,883 --> 00:06:57,783
I DON'T THINK SO.
107
00:06:57,785 --> 00:06:59,718
MATTER OF TIME.
108
00:06:59,720 --> 00:07:02,654
GOD DAMN ANIMALS INSIDE.
109
00:07:02,656 --> 00:07:04,890
DID YOU SEE
THAT GIRL.
110
00:07:04,892 --> 00:07:06,910
DID I SEE
WHAT GIRL?
111
00:07:06,930 --> 00:07:08,693
DO I EVEN
GIVE A SHIT?
112
00:07:08,695 --> 00:07:10,462
IS SAL HERE?
113
00:07:19,806 --> 00:07:25,100
YOUR HEAD LOOKS
LIKE FRANKENSTEIN.
114
00:07:27,180 --> 00:07:37,189
[MUSIC]
115
00:07:37,191 --> 00:07:47,499
[MUSIC]
116
00:07:47,501 --> 00:07:52,604
[MUSIC]
117
00:07:54,907 --> 00:07:57,142
PIECE OF SHIT
WON'T START!
118
00:07:58,911 --> 00:08:00,679
JUST "JIGGLE" IT.
119
00:08:00,681 --> 00:08:02,800
I DON'T KNOW WHAT
THE FUCK THAT MEANS!
120
00:08:02,820 --> 00:08:05,183
YEAH!
JUST JIGGLE IT SAL!
121
00:08:05,185 --> 00:08:06,485
YOU SMELL LIKE BOOZE!
122
00:08:06,487 --> 00:08:07,886
THERE'S NO WAY
YOU'RE DRIVING.
123
00:08:07,888 --> 00:08:09,554
''CAUSE SHE LICKED ME!
124
00:08:11,557 --> 00:08:12,824
[STARTS ENGINE]
125
00:08:12,826 --> 00:08:14,226
OH!
126
00:08:14,228 --> 00:08:15,930
UGH!
127
00:08:16,229 --> 00:08:17,262
WHOAH!
128
00:08:21,801 --> 00:08:22,534
[TIRES SCREECH]
129
00:08:22,536 --> 00:08:23,168
[CRASH!]
130
00:08:23,170 --> 00:08:24,690
[SCREAM!]
131
00:08:25,771 --> 00:08:26,938
AH, Fee-yuk....
132
00:08:28,774 --> 00:08:29,708
LET'S GET
OUT OF HERE.
133
00:08:30,142 --> 00:08:32,210
[TOW TRUCK BEEP]
134
00:08:34,800 --> 00:08:36,214
(OFFICER TOTSCH) SO WHAT
HAPPENED WITH THE DEER?
135
00:08:36,216 --> 00:08:37,115
IT JUST RAN
OUT IN--
136
00:08:37,117 --> 00:08:38,583
INTO THE MIDDLE
OF THE ROAD.
137
00:08:38,585 --> 00:08:39,551
UH, HUH.
138
00:08:39,553 --> 00:08:41,553
HEY, SAL.
139
00:08:41,555 --> 00:08:44,289
THANKS FOR RUINING THE PARTY,
RIGHT WHEN IT WAS GETTING GOOD.
140
00:08:46,259 --> 00:08:48,960
ALRIGHT, JAGOFFS!
KNOCK IT OFF!
141
00:08:48,962 --> 00:08:51,596
HALLOWINSKI!
142
00:08:51,598 --> 00:08:54,199
BRIAN,
WERE YOU DRINKING?
143
00:08:54,201 --> 00:08:55,867
NO. I SWEAR,
OFFICER TOTSCH.
144
00:08:55,869 --> 00:08:58,203
COUNT BACKWARDS
FROM TEN.
145
00:08:58,205 --> 00:08:59,170
NINE...
146
00:08:59,172 --> 00:08:59,804
EIGHT...
147
00:08:59,806 --> 00:09:00,539
SEVEN--
148
00:09:00,541 --> 00:09:01,573
YOU MISSED TEN.
149
00:09:01,575 --> 00:09:03,909
I GOING TO ADMINISTER
A BREATHALYZER.
150
00:09:03,911 --> 00:09:06,545
NO, I SWEAR I DIDN'T
DRINK ANYTHING!
151
00:09:06,547 --> 00:09:08,146
THEN WHERE ARE
YOUR SHOES?
152
00:09:10,216 --> 00:09:12,117
STOP HYPERVENTILATING.
153
00:09:12,119 --> 00:09:13,752
BRIAN,
SHUT YOUR MOUTH.
154
00:09:24,597 --> 00:09:27,666
0.0? WHAT THE FUCK
ARE YOU A NARC?
155
00:09:29,168 --> 00:09:32,637
[DOG BARKING]
156
00:09:38,244 --> 00:09:42,847
[CAR ENGINE]
157
00:09:44,350 --> 00:09:46,840
[CAR DOOR OPENS]
158
00:09:46,860 --> 00:09:48,186
HEY THERE.
[CAR DOOR CLOSES]
159
00:09:49,922 --> 00:09:52,123
INTERESTING NIGHT.
160
00:09:52,125 --> 00:09:55,193
HAD A DOMESTIC DISTURBANCE
OVER BY ST. JULIANNA.
161
00:09:55,195 --> 00:09:59,197
GOT OUT OF CONTROL
REAL FAST.
162
00:09:59,199 --> 00:10:00,665
YOUR MA CALLED ME
163
00:10:00,667 --> 00:10:03,368
ABOUT HELPING TO FIX
THE BATHROOM DOOR THIS WEEK.
164
00:10:03,370 --> 00:10:05,370
IT'S OKAY,
I'LL FIX IT.
165
00:10:05,372 --> 00:10:08,740
IT AIN'T THE END OF THE WORLD
IF I FIX THE DOOR, BRIAN.
166
00:10:08,742 --> 00:10:12,344
DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT.
BUT, THANKS.
167
00:10:12,346 --> 00:10:14,746
IS YOUR
BROTHER HOME?
168
00:10:14,748 --> 00:10:17,649
I DON'T THINK SO.
169
00:10:17,651 --> 00:10:18,850
WELL, I'LL TELL YOU
THE SAME THING
170
00:10:18,852 --> 00:10:23,288
THAT I TOLD THAT J.O.
WHEN HE WAS YOUR AGE:
171
00:10:23,290 --> 00:10:30,328
IF YOU START FUCKIN' AROUND,
I WILL KNOCK YOUR DICK OFF.
172
00:10:30,330 --> 00:10:33,640
YOU'VE HAD A ROUGH
COUPLE YEARS.
173
00:10:33,660 --> 00:10:34,933
I KNOW YOU MAY NOT
WANT TO TALK TO A MEMBER
174
00:10:34,935 --> 00:10:37,680
OF THE ILLINOIS LAW
ENFORCEMENT COMMUNITY,
175
00:10:37,700 --> 00:10:40,380
BUT THERE'S A FIRST TIME
FOR EVERYTHING.
176
00:10:40,400 --> 00:10:43,775
IF YOU WANT, WE'LL GO
GET A BEEF SANDWICH
177
00:10:43,777 --> 00:10:46,110
AND DO SOME
PROBLEM-SOLVING.
178
00:10:46,130 --> 00:10:48,179
OR IF YOU WANT TO TALK
TO SOMEBODY ELSE,
179
00:10:48,181 --> 00:10:50,849
THERE'S "JESUS AND ME"
OVER AT MARY SEAT.
180
00:10:50,851 --> 00:10:52,217
BUNCH OF KIDS GET TOGETHER
181
00:10:52,219 --> 00:10:55,420
AND TALK ABOUT WHAT
MAKES 'EM FEEL BAD...
182
00:10:55,422 --> 00:10:56,888
AND JESUS.
183
00:10:56,890 --> 00:10:59,858
MAYBE I'LL CHECK IT OUT.
THANK YOU.
184
00:10:59,860 --> 00:11:03,428
TALK ABOUT GOD
AND SHIT.
185
00:11:03,430 --> 00:11:04,929
GOOD NIGHT.
186
00:11:11,237 --> 00:11:13,738
GET SOME SLEEP YOU
LITTLE PIMP.
187
00:11:17,176 --> 00:11:25,884
[ALARM CLOCK TICKING]
188
00:11:25,886 --> 00:11:28,887
[ALARM GOING OFF]
189
00:11:28,889 --> 00:11:38,897
[MUSIC]
190
00:11:38,899 --> 00:11:49,700
[MUSIC]
191
00:11:49,900 --> 00:12:04,189
[MUSIC]
192
00:12:21,974 --> 00:12:23,341
HEY BUD.
193
00:12:29,148 --> 00:12:32,851
I THOUGHT THAT WE TALKED
ABOUT NOT PARKING IN THE LOT?
194
00:12:32,853 --> 00:12:34,520
YEAH, I CAN'T BE
LATE TO CLASS.
195
00:12:34,540 --> 00:12:36,870
YOU GUYS CAN'T USE
THE VAN ANYMORE.
196
00:12:36,890 --> 00:12:37,122
YOU KNOW, I'VE BEEN
MEANING TO TELL YOU
197
00:12:37,124 --> 00:12:38,256
ABOUT THESE MUSHROOMS
198
00:12:38,258 --> 00:12:40,191
THAT KEEP GROWING IN
THE BACK ON THE CARPET.
199
00:12:40,193 --> 00:12:42,227
WAIT, WHAT DID
YOU SAY?
200
00:12:42,229 --> 00:12:44,829
I'M RETIRING THE SIN BIN.
201
00:12:44,831 --> 00:12:46,331
YOU'RE MESSING
WITH ME?
202
00:12:46,333 --> 00:12:47,432
YOU'RE NOT
MESSING WITH ME?
203
00:12:47,434 --> 00:12:49,467
YOU KNOW, I NEED
TO GET OUT THERE.
204
00:12:49,469 --> 00:12:51,970
SO I WENT OUT WITH YOU GUYS,
AND I SEE A CUTE GIRL
205
00:12:51,972 --> 00:12:53,972
AND THEN I HAVE TO TAKE
A SOBRIETY TEST.
206
00:12:53,974 --> 00:12:55,807
WHICH GIRL?
207
00:12:55,809 --> 00:12:56,508
DOESN'T MATTER.
208
00:12:56,510 --> 00:12:59,377
OF COURSE IT MATTERS.
209
00:12:59,379 --> 00:13:01,312
SUZIE KOSOLANSKY.
210
00:13:01,314 --> 00:13:02,881
YOU'RE RIGHT,
SHE DOESN'T MATTER.
211
00:13:02,883 --> 00:13:04,115
WHY DOESN'T
SHE MATTER?
212
00:13:04,117 --> 00:13:06,117
BECAUSE SHE MATTERS
AND EVERYONE KNOWS THAT
213
00:13:06,119 --> 00:13:09,854
AND YOU DON'T MATTER
AND EVERYONE KNOWS THAT TOO.
214
00:13:09,856 --> 00:13:13,458
I'M STILL
RETIRING THE BIN.
215
00:13:13,460 --> 00:13:16,828
YOU KNOW, YOU'RE THE ONLY
ONE OF US THAT HAS A CAR, BRIAN.
216
00:13:16,830 --> 00:13:19,300
I MEAN, I LIVE WITH MY MOM
AND MY FOUR SISTERS.
217
00:13:19,320 --> 00:13:20,365
HOW AM I EVER GOING
TO BRING A GIRL HOME?
218
00:13:23,402 --> 00:13:26,271
LET ME GET
BACK TO YOU.
219
00:13:28,340 --> 00:13:35,790
[MUSIC]
220
00:13:35,810 --> 00:13:36,214
[THROAT CLEARING]
221
00:13:36,216 --> 00:13:40,485
[MUSIC]
222
00:13:40,487 --> 00:13:41,386
PSSST!
223
00:13:41,388 --> 00:13:43,822
[MUSIC]
224
00:13:43,824 --> 00:13:46,324
WHAT'S UP?
225
00:13:46,326 --> 00:13:49,394
AND HOW COME YOU GET TO WEAR
SNEAKERS WITH YOUR UNIFORM?
226
00:13:49,396 --> 00:13:51,290
BECAUSE.
227
00:13:51,310 --> 00:13:52,530
GREEN MILL, NORTH SIDE.
228
00:13:52,532 --> 00:13:55,500
YOU'RE GONNA SEE
A MAN ABOUT A HORSE.
229
00:13:55,502 --> 00:13:58,360
HALL PASS, IN CASE
YOU GET STOPPED.
230
00:13:58,380 --> 00:14:00,505
I WROTE IT OUT
FOR THE DEAN'S OFFICE,
231
00:14:00,507 --> 00:14:02,473
THE HALL MONITOR WILL ALREADY
THINK YOU'RE IN TROUBLE.
232
00:14:02,475 --> 00:14:04,609
ALSO, I WAS HOPING YOU
COULD SWING BY MY LOCKER
233
00:14:04,611 --> 00:14:06,110
AND DROP MY JACKET OFF.
234
00:14:12,551 --> 00:14:14,986
I'M REALLY SORRY.
235
00:14:14,988 --> 00:14:17,388
IT'S COOL.
236
00:14:17,390 --> 00:14:19,190
LOOK LIKE SOMEBODY
HIT THE JACKPOT.
237
00:14:19,192 --> 00:14:20,910
OH!
238
00:14:26,899 --> 00:14:29,200
BRIAN DINES?
239
00:14:29,202 --> 00:14:30,869
IT'S DIE-NESS.
240
00:14:30,871 --> 00:14:32,337
SUZIE, RIGHT?
241
00:14:32,339 --> 00:14:34,720
DEAN THEATARD?
242
00:14:34,740 --> 00:14:36,207
AWW, SHIT!
243
00:14:36,209 --> 00:14:40,245
I'LL COME WITH, I'LL GRAB
A JUICEBOX FROM THE CAFETERIA.
244
00:14:40,247 --> 00:14:42,580
SO ARE YOU IN TROUBLE
WITH THE DEAN?
245
00:14:42,582 --> 00:14:46,317
MISUNDERSTANDING
I THINK.
246
00:14:46,319 --> 00:14:49,320
YOU HAD AN OLDER BROTHER
WHO WENT HERE, RIGHT?
247
00:14:49,322 --> 00:14:51,550
YEAH,
HOW'D YOU KNOW THAT?
248
00:14:51,570 --> 00:14:52,257
I'VE HEARD THE LEGEND.
249
00:14:52,259 --> 00:14:54,392
HE BURNT DOWN THE
BLEACHERS DIDN'T HE?
250
00:14:54,394 --> 00:14:56,294
[CHUCKLES]
251
00:14:56,296 --> 00:14:57,996
WHAT?
252
00:14:57,998 --> 00:15:01,432
I DON'T KNOW.
253
00:15:01,434 --> 00:15:04,903
HE LOST HIS SCHOLARSHIP THOUGH,
THEY KICKED HIM OUT.
254
00:15:04,905 --> 00:15:06,337
I'M A SCHOLARSHIP
KID TOO.
255
00:15:06,339 --> 00:15:08,940
BUT, I GUESS SENIOR YEAR
DOESN'T MATTER.
256
00:15:08,942 --> 00:15:09,641
SO THAT'S GOOD.
257
00:15:09,643 --> 00:15:11,509
YEAH, HE WAS
A SOPHOMORE.
258
00:15:11,511 --> 00:15:13,440
OH!
259
00:15:18,584 --> 00:15:21,519
THIS IS YOUR STOP.
260
00:15:21,521 --> 00:15:22,687
SORRY I CLEANED
YOUR CLOCK.
261
00:15:22,689 --> 00:15:24,555
OH, IT'S TOTALLY
MY FAULT.
262
00:15:24,557 --> 00:15:26,324
I'M SORRY.
263
00:15:32,598 --> 00:15:34,650
THANKS!
264
00:15:34,670 --> 00:15:35,533
THAT SHOULD HELP.
265
00:16:08,434 --> 00:16:10,969
HI THERE.
266
00:16:10,971 --> 00:16:12,503
I'M TONY CAITO.
267
00:16:12,505 --> 00:16:14,372
I KNOW WHO YOU ARE.
268
00:16:21,347 --> 00:16:22,480
SIT.
269
00:16:31,123 --> 00:16:33,291
PEANUT BUTTER PRETZEL?
270
00:16:33,293 --> 00:16:35,426
NO.
271
00:16:40,990 --> 00:16:41,199
[CRUNCH]
272
00:16:42,601 --> 00:16:45,300
DO YOU KNOW WHAT
I DO AS STUDENT LIAISON?
273
00:16:45,500 --> 00:16:46,304
NOT REALLY, NO.
274
00:16:46,306 --> 00:16:48,740
IF YOU'RE BEING GOOD,
I'LL POINT THAT OUT.
275
00:16:48,742 --> 00:16:52,677
IF YOU'RE BEING BAD,
WELL...
276
00:16:52,679 --> 00:16:54,779
LIKE A... NARC?
277
00:16:54,781 --> 00:16:57,810
NO, HATE THE WORD.
278
00:16:57,830 --> 00:16:58,160
[DOOR OPENS]
279
00:17:06,225 --> 00:17:07,291
THANKS.
280
00:17:14,233 --> 00:17:15,633
GLENN SPEAKS
HIGHLY OF YOU.
281
00:17:15,635 --> 00:17:17,301
OH, HE'S A NICE GUY.
282
00:17:17,303 --> 00:17:20,238
WHY'D YOU TELL THE
COPS YOU WERE DRIVING?
283
00:17:20,240 --> 00:17:22,273
I HEARD SAL
WAS DRIVING.
284
00:17:22,275 --> 00:17:23,441
I ALSO HEARD HE
HAD BEEN DRINKING.
285
00:17:23,443 --> 00:17:24,375
WHO TOLD YOU THAT?
286
00:17:24,377 --> 00:17:25,476
SAL.
287
00:17:25,478 --> 00:17:26,778
SHITEHAUS?
288
00:17:26,780 --> 00:17:30,481
CLEAN IT UP.
WE ON THE SAME TRAIN?
289
00:17:30,483 --> 00:17:32,683
SURE... SORRY.
290
00:17:32,685 --> 00:17:34,452
UNDERAGE DRINKING CAN
BE BECOME A BIG PROBLEM,
291
00:17:34,454 --> 00:17:37,121
ESPECIALLY FOR YOU
GUYS ON SCHOLARSHIP.
292
00:17:37,123 --> 00:17:38,523
BETTER BE CAREFUL.
293
00:17:44,229 --> 00:17:47,698
I GOT IT!
294
00:17:47,700 --> 00:17:52,437
UM, IT'S ACTUALLY
SHYTHEHOFF... HOFF.
295
00:17:52,439 --> 00:17:54,720
IT'S GERM-INDIAN.
296
00:17:54,740 --> 00:17:54,772
MY DAD--
297
00:17:54,774 --> 00:17:56,407
NO, NO, NO,
I DON'T CARE.
298
00:17:56,409 --> 00:17:57,842
YEAH
299
00:17:59,478 --> 00:18:00,344
OK.
300
00:18:01,580 --> 00:18:02,847
WAY TO WASH YOUR HANDS,
TINY TIM.
301
00:18:02,849 --> 00:18:04,315
I HAVE CLEANSER.
302
00:18:09,555 --> 00:18:11,756
HOW'S IT WORK?
303
00:18:11,758 --> 00:18:12,757
HOW DOES WHAT WORK?
304
00:18:12,759 --> 00:18:14,826
WE SHOULD MOVE THE BIN.
305
00:18:14,828 --> 00:18:18,129
I'M GONNA GO OUT ON A LIMB
AND SAY THAT AT LEAST 75%
306
00:18:18,131 --> 00:18:19,330
OF THE SENIOR CLASS
IS SEXUALLY ACTIVE.
307
00:18:19,332 --> 00:18:21,299
WOULD YOU AGREE?
308
00:18:21,301 --> 00:18:24,202
I THINK THAT SEEMS EXCEEDINGLY
HIGH, DON'T YOU THINK?
309
00:18:24,204 --> 00:18:27,105
I THINK THAT SEEMS
EXCEEDINGLY LOW, DON'T YOU?
310
00:18:27,107 --> 00:18:28,372
IT'D BE SAFE TO SAY THAT YOU'RE
IN THE MINORITY PERCENTILE.
311
00:18:28,374 --> 00:18:31,109
CORRECT?
312
00:18:31,111 --> 00:18:36,447
IT'S TOTALLY COOL,
I'M NOT... JUDGING YOU.
313
00:18:39,852 --> 00:18:42,120
TWO MONTHS AGO STEVE
AND I WERE PARTNERS
314
00:18:42,122 --> 00:18:43,488
FOR AN ANCIENT CIVS PROJECT
315
00:18:43,490 --> 00:18:45,690
AND WE HAD TO MAKE
THIS REPLICATED-TO-SCALE
316
00:18:45,692 --> 00:18:48,559
TROJAN HORSE OUT
OF PAPER MACHE'.
317
00:18:48,561 --> 00:18:49,827
IT WAS ACTUALLY
KIND OF AWESOME,
318
00:18:49,829 --> 00:18:53,798
EXCEPT, UH, I HAD TO DO
THE ENTIRE THING MYSELF.
319
00:18:53,800 --> 00:18:57,768
AND THEN STEVE BORROWED THE VAN
TO MOVE THE MODEL TO HIS HOUSE.
320
00:18:57,770 --> 00:18:59,504
THEN HE HAD SEX IN IT.
321
00:18:59,506 --> 00:19:01,439
IN THE TROJAN HORSE?
322
00:19:01,441 --> 00:19:03,374
NO, IN THE VAN.
323
00:19:03,376 --> 00:19:05,276
RIGHT,
YOU SAID "TO SCALE".
324
00:19:05,278 --> 00:19:07,578
THEN STEVE TOLD GLENN.
325
00:19:07,580 --> 00:19:08,746
AND SAL.
326
00:19:13,185 --> 00:19:15,186
OH, WHAT DO WE HAVE HERE.
327
00:19:15,188 --> 00:19:18,789
HEY-0H! HEY, KIM,
DO YOU HAVE A PASS?
328
00:19:18,791 --> 00:19:21,192
MY CAR HAD A FLAT,
TONY, I SWEAR!
329
00:19:21,194 --> 00:19:23,194
YEAH, I'M ONLY KIDDING.
YOU'RE STILL ADORABLE.
330
00:19:23,196 --> 00:19:24,195
I'M TEASING YOU.
331
00:19:24,197 --> 00:19:27,498
HE ALMOST DROVE HIS VAN THROUGH
A HOUSE THIS WEEKEND,
332
00:19:27,500 --> 00:19:28,533
DO YOU BELIEVE IT?
333
00:19:28,535 --> 00:19:29,534
ARE YOU SERIOUS?
334
00:19:29,536 --> 00:19:30,668
THAT'S CRAZY!
335
00:19:30,670 --> 00:19:32,403
THAT IS CRAZY.
336
00:19:32,405 --> 00:19:34,338
YEAH, THE COPS WERE GONNA
THROW HIM IN THE SLAMMER.
337
00:19:34,340 --> 00:19:37,608
HE'S A WILD MAN.
338
00:19:37,610 --> 00:19:40,444
WE JUST WANTED
TO SAY "HEY".
339
00:19:40,446 --> 00:19:42,280
CUTE SHOES THOUGH.
340
00:19:42,282 --> 00:19:43,447
THANK YOU.
341
00:19:43,449 --> 00:19:44,749
NICE TO MEET YOU,
BRIAN.
342
00:19:44,751 --> 00:19:46,284
YEAH, YOU TOO.
343
00:19:48,720 --> 00:19:52,723
SHE HAS THE NICEST,
SOFTEST REAR END.
344
00:19:52,725 --> 00:19:54,959
I WANNA TONGUE-FUCK IT.
345
00:19:57,829 --> 00:19:59,797
HOW COME YOU DON'T
DRIVE AN AUTOMATIC?
346
00:19:59,799 --> 00:20:01,365
SAME REASON
I DON'T WEAR SHORTS.
347
00:20:04,503 --> 00:20:16,314
[CLASSICAL MUSIC]
348
00:20:18,884 --> 00:20:22,420
THAT'S FANTASTIC.
349
00:20:22,422 --> 00:20:24,355
I CAN HELP YOU.
350
00:20:24,357 --> 00:20:26,490
WITH WHAT EXACTLY?
351
00:20:26,492 --> 00:20:27,959
I IMAGINE YOU DON'T RUN
INTO SPACIAL CHALLENGES,
352
00:20:27,961 --> 00:20:29,560
PRIVACY ISSUES.
353
00:20:29,562 --> 00:20:30,995
TEENAGERS ARE ALWAYS
LOOKING FOR PLACES
354
00:20:30,997 --> 00:20:32,897
TO BRING THEIR
BOYFRIENDS, GIRLFRIENDS.
355
00:20:32,899 --> 00:20:34,832
SEEING THAT IT'S
UNSEASONABLY NIPPY THIS YEAR,
356
00:20:34,834 --> 00:20:38,903
I'D SAY THAT LIST
IS PRETTY SHORT.
357
00:20:38,905 --> 00:20:41,672
BETWEEN ME, YOU, THE HALL
AND THE WALL,
358
00:20:41,674 --> 00:20:43,708
HER FATHER'S THE DEAN OF
ADMISSIONS AT NORTHWESTERN.
359
00:20:43,710 --> 00:20:45,610
BUT, MORE THAN THAT,
SHE'S A REAL SWEETHEART,
360
00:20:45,612 --> 00:20:47,478
SO I'M SPOKEN FOR.
361
00:20:47,480 --> 00:20:49,280
IF I WERE YOU...
362
00:20:49,282 --> 00:20:53,784
PING. PING. EHH...
363
00:20:53,786 --> 00:20:55,519
I'D ACCEPT MY HELP.
364
00:21:02,894 --> 00:21:04,462
HOW'S NINE O'CLOCK?
365
00:21:05,631 --> 00:21:15,640
[MUSIC]
366
00:21:15,642 --> 00:21:22,880
[MUSIC]
367
00:21:24,816 --> 00:21:26,951
EVERWOOD CONDOM.
368
00:21:26,953 --> 00:21:29,787
HELPS YOUR STUFF STAY
A LITTLE LONGER,
369
00:21:29,789 --> 00:21:32,890
JUST PUT THE
RIGHT SIDE ON.
370
00:21:32,892 --> 00:21:34,625
WHERE YOU TAKING ME?
371
00:21:34,627 --> 00:21:36,727
EXTRA-CURRICULAR
ACTIVITIES DAY.
372
00:21:36,729 --> 00:21:38,562
WE'RE GONNA
WORK THE ROOM.
373
00:21:38,564 --> 00:21:44,502
JUST STAY CLOSE AND TRY
TO LOOK GENTLEMANLY.
374
00:21:44,504 --> 00:21:47,438
[MUSIC]
375
00:21:47,440 --> 00:21:49,373
I'M PULLED OVER
ON SHERIDAN.
376
00:21:49,375 --> 00:21:51,475
COP COMES TO THE WINDOW
AND ASKS,
377
00:21:51,477 --> 00:21:53,711
"HEY HAVE YOU FELLAS
BEEN DRINKING?"
378
00:21:53,713 --> 00:21:55,346
"I HAD A FEW BEERS TONIGHT.
I'M NOT GOING TO LIE.
379
00:21:55,348 --> 00:21:57,882
SPRING BREAK'S COMING UP,
FUCK IT, RIGHT?"
380
00:21:57,884 --> 00:22:05,823
[MUSIC]
381
00:22:05,825 --> 00:22:08,693
OH, WHO SAYS YOU GET
TO SIT IN THE COCKPIT?
382
00:22:13,732 --> 00:22:15,566
THE GUY HATES ME,
I DON'T WHY.
383
00:22:15,568 --> 00:22:17,702
MAYBE IT'S THAT I'M A YOUNG GUY
IN A VINTAGE JAG
384
00:22:17,704 --> 00:22:18,969
WITH A ROSIE THE RIVETER
BUMPER STICKER...
385
00:22:18,971 --> 00:22:20,370
I DON'T KNOW.
386
00:22:20,390 --> 00:22:22,600
POINT IS, I DON'T
KNOW WHAT TO SAY.
387
00:22:22,800 --> 00:22:22,840
I'M SPEECHLESS.
388
00:22:28,613 --> 00:22:32,783
I'M NOT GOING TO CHOP
YOU UP OR ANYTHING.
389
00:22:32,785 --> 00:22:35,653
NOW I DEFINITELY
DON'T WANNA GET IN.
390
00:22:36,880 --> 00:22:41,250
[MUSIC]
391
00:22:41,270 --> 00:22:42,526
DON!!
392
00:22:44,363 --> 00:22:46,430
BRIAN LEANS IN
LIKE HE'S GONNA RUN SHIT.
393
00:22:46,432 --> 00:22:50,000
HE KNOWS HE HAS TO BE
AGGRESSIVE, BE-BE-AGGRESSIVE.
394
00:22:50,200 --> 00:22:51,535
[LAUGHTER]
395
00:22:51,537 --> 00:23:02,847
[MUSIC]
396
00:23:02,849 --> 00:23:03,781
YOU'RE NOT
DOING THAT RIGHT.
397
00:23:05,650 --> 00:23:07,752
[EROTIC MOANS]
398
00:23:07,754 --> 00:23:12,957
[MUSIC]
399
00:23:12,959 --> 00:23:15,526
I'LL NOTIFY YOU
OF MY NEXT WHEREABOUTS.
400
00:23:17,996 --> 00:23:19,897
BRIAN SAYS,
"WHY, ARE YOU BUYING?"
401
00:23:19,899 --> 00:23:22,867
[LAUGHTER]
402
00:23:22,869 --> 00:23:24,502
COP LEANS IN
AND STARES AT HIM,
403
00:23:24,504 --> 00:23:27,400
HE DOESN'T TAKE HIS EYES OFF
HIS EYES, LIKE A FUCKING HAWK.
404
00:23:27,600 --> 00:23:34,645
[MUSIC]
405
00:23:43,789 --> 00:23:45,656
HEY!
406
00:23:45,658 --> 00:23:46,457
BROTHER.
407
00:23:46,459 --> 00:23:47,425
HI.
408
00:23:55,100 --> 00:23:59,203
UM BENNY, I KNOW
YOU JUST GOT HOME
409
00:23:59,205 --> 00:24:00,871
AND THIS MIGHT
SEEM WEIRD,
410
00:24:00,873 --> 00:24:04,975
AND I ONLY ASK THIS BECAUSE MY
POCKETS ARE PISSING QUARTERS,
411
00:24:04,977 --> 00:24:07,978
DO YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENED
TO MY LUNCH MONEY?
412
00:24:07,980 --> 00:24:11,480
NO.
413
00:24:11,500 --> 00:24:13,984
YES. I TOOK THE CASH
AND GAVE YOU SOME CHANGE
414
00:24:13,986 --> 00:24:16,654
FROM MY
VENDING MACHINE.
415
00:24:16,656 --> 00:24:21,892
FROM YOUR - OF COURSE YOU
HAVE A VENDING MACHINE.
416
00:24:21,894 --> 00:24:23,694
IS IT IN
THE HOUSE?
417
00:24:23,696 --> 00:24:25,963
NO, IT'S IN
THE BREAK ROOM
418
00:24:25,965 --> 00:24:28,232
OF AN APPLIANCE
SHOP IN WISCONSIN,
419
00:24:28,234 --> 00:24:31,350
WHICH IS GREAT BECAUSE
THEY'VE VOLUNTEERED TO GIVE US
420
00:24:31,370 --> 00:24:35,706
A DISCOUNT ON ANY ELECTRICAL
NEEDS WE MIGHT HAVE.
421
00:24:35,708 --> 00:24:41,178
THEY HAVE
EXCELLENT TELEVISIONS.
422
00:24:41,180 --> 00:24:42,980
TOTSCH SAID
YOU CRASHED THE BIN.
423
00:24:42,982 --> 00:24:44,648
KNOCK YOUR DICK OFF?
424
00:24:44,650 --> 00:24:48,219
YEAH, OF COURSE--
SO WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?
425
00:24:48,221 --> 00:24:50,654
IN THE BASEMENT.
426
00:24:50,656 --> 00:24:53,591
NO, FOR LIKE
TWO AND A HALF YEARS.
427
00:24:53,593 --> 00:24:55,226
AROUND.
428
00:24:55,228 --> 00:24:57,695
HAVE YOU BEEN WORKING?
429
00:24:57,697 --> 00:25:01,565
YES, I'VE BEEN WORKING.
I'VE WORKED.
430
00:25:01,567 --> 00:25:04,668
PLUS THE VENDING MACHINE.
431
00:25:04,670 --> 00:25:05,769
HAVE YOU TALKED
TO LAUREN?
432
00:25:10,876 --> 00:25:14,440
DID I MAKE IT WEIRD?
433
00:25:14,460 --> 00:25:17,815
NO, I DON'T TALK
TO HER.
434
00:25:17,817 --> 00:25:20,117
HAVE YOU SEEN
MY BEANIE?
435
00:25:20,119 --> 00:25:21,552
BEANIE?
436
00:25:21,554 --> 00:25:22,820
MY BEANIE,
THAT WOOL HAT.
437
00:25:22,822 --> 00:25:24,855
THE ONE WITH
THE SHIT ON IT.
438
00:25:24,857 --> 00:25:28,692
NO, I DON'T THINK SO.
439
00:25:28,694 --> 00:25:30,127
IS ALPHA-BRAN
THE ONLY CEREAL WE HAVE?
440
00:25:30,129 --> 00:25:32,290
I REALLY ...
I HATE ALPHA-BRAN.
441
00:25:32,310 --> 00:25:33,230
WHATEVER'S IN THE CABINET.
442
00:25:33,232 --> 00:25:35,650
OK.
443
00:25:35,670 --> 00:25:36,867
I'M GONNA LOOK
INTO THAT, LATER.
444
00:25:42,574 --> 00:25:44,275
FOR THE HANDICAPPED
BATHROOM,
445
00:25:44,277 --> 00:25:45,175
IF YOU NEED TO
TAKE A MINUTE.
446
00:25:45,177 --> 00:25:47,110
THANKS.
447
00:25:47,130 --> 00:25:50,881
THIS IS FRESHMAN PHIL, HE JUST
TRANSFERRED FROM MOUNT CARMEL.
448
00:25:50,883 --> 00:25:53,284
BUT THERE'S A MUSHROOM
PROBLEM IN THE BACK.
449
00:25:53,286 --> 00:25:54,618
TERRIBLE GAS MILEAGE.
450
00:25:54,620 --> 00:25:59,290
A GIRL LEFT HER
SHOE IN THE BIN.
451
00:25:59,292 --> 00:26:01,580
HOW DO YOU KNOW
IT'S A GIRLS?
452
00:26:01,600 --> 00:26:02,226
WELL...
453
00:26:02,228 --> 00:26:04,328
AND YOU DON'T LOOK
LIKE A SIZE SIX.
454
00:26:04,330 --> 00:26:06,230
THAT'S VERY NICE
OF YOU TO SAY.
455
00:26:06,232 --> 00:26:07,831
HOW DO YOU LEAVE
ONE SHOE?
456
00:26:07,833 --> 00:26:08,332
PASSION.
457
00:26:12,203 --> 00:26:13,571
TONY CAITO?
458
00:26:13,573 --> 00:26:14,271
DEAN THEATARD.
459
00:26:14,273 --> 00:26:15,172
HOW ARE YOU?
460
00:26:15,174 --> 00:26:16,273
LET'S TOUCH SOME
SKY MY FRIEND.
461
00:26:16,275 --> 00:26:18,609
YES!!!
462
00:26:18,611 --> 00:26:19,977
HELLO, BRIAN.
463
00:26:19,979 --> 00:26:21,145
HOW ARE YOU
MY FRIEND?
464
00:26:21,147 --> 00:26:22,112
GOOD, GOOD.
465
00:26:22,114 --> 00:26:24,140
WOULD YOU LIKE TO
TOUCH SOME SKY?
466
00:26:24,160 --> 00:26:25,150
SURE.
467
00:26:25,170 --> 00:26:27,952
LET'S GO DADDY-O.
TOUCHING THE SKY!
468
00:26:27,954 --> 00:26:30,688
SO, KEEPING THE 4.0
GOING THIS SEMESTER?
469
00:26:30,690 --> 00:26:31,889
ABSOLUTELY, SIR.
470
00:26:31,891 --> 00:26:33,157
THAT MAKES ME FEEL GOOD.
471
00:26:33,159 --> 00:26:36,293
YOU ARE COOKING WITH
HIGH-OCTANE GASOLINE,MY FRIEND!
472
00:26:36,295 --> 00:26:38,262
AND, YOU GOT THIS GUY
LOOKING OUT FOR YOU.
473
00:26:38,264 --> 00:26:40,264
YOU'RE SET.
474
00:26:40,266 --> 00:26:41,665
HAVE A NICE DAY.
475
00:26:41,667 --> 00:26:42,600
HAVE A NICE DAY?
476
00:26:42,602 --> 00:26:43,367
IS THAT WHAT
YOU SAY?
477
00:26:43,369 --> 00:26:44,868
YOU MAKE IT
A GOOD DAY!
478
00:26:44,870 --> 00:26:48,138
IT'S UP TO YOU
WHAT YOU DO WITH TODAY.
479
00:26:48,140 --> 00:26:51,800
TODAY'S A WONDERFUL DAY
TO BE ALIVE.
480
00:26:55,146 --> 00:26:56,914
JUST CHECKING
YOU KIDS OUT,
481
00:26:56,916 --> 00:26:58,349
SEEING WHAT
YOU'RE MAD OF.
482
00:26:58,351 --> 00:27:00,217
GOOD WORK
TODAY GENTLEMEN.
483
00:27:01,520 --> 00:27:03,120
MR. PHILABUSTERY....
484
00:27:03,122 --> 00:27:05,856
YOUR HAIR LOOKS...
485
00:27:05,858 --> 00:27:07,791
WRONG.
486
00:27:07,793 --> 00:27:10,160
IT'S BEEN BOTHERING ME ALL DAY,
I LOOK LIKE A SALAMANDER.
487
00:27:10,162 --> 00:27:12,896
I SAW YOU TALKING WITH KIM,
DID YOU USE THE STORY?
488
00:27:12,898 --> 00:27:16,700
SMART WHORE THOUGH,
SHE'S GOING TO YALE.
489
00:27:16,702 --> 00:27:17,401
HOW DO YOU
KNOW THAT?
490
00:27:17,403 --> 00:27:19,903
I READ HER TRANSCRIPTS.
491
00:27:19,905 --> 00:27:24,174
BECAUSE EVERYONE SAYS,
"LOOK AT THAT WHORE, KIM".
492
00:27:24,176 --> 00:27:25,676
WHY YOU GOING
TO TELL ME THAT?
493
00:27:25,678 --> 00:27:26,910
NOW I'M GONNA
FEEL BAD FOR HER.
494
00:27:26,912 --> 00:27:28,178
BABY!
495
00:27:28,180 --> 00:27:29,980
FUCK!.
496
00:27:29,982 --> 00:27:32,216
HEEEEEY!!
497
00:27:32,218 --> 00:27:35,753
I MADE LACTOSE-TOLERANT
CARROT CAKE CUPCAKES FOR YOU!
498
00:27:35,755 --> 00:27:37,210
O-M-GOD.
499
00:27:37,230 --> 00:27:38,322
YOU'RE THE BEST!
500
00:27:49,701 --> 00:27:51,335
SEE YOU IN
THE JOCK-LOT LATER.
501
00:27:51,337 --> 00:27:56,240
I LOVE THE FUCKIN'
SHIT OUT OF YOU.
502
00:27:56,242 --> 00:27:57,675
LOVE YOU TOO.
503
00:28:03,782 --> 00:28:07,351
I FUCKIN' HATE
CARROT CAKE.
504
00:28:07,353 --> 00:28:09,190
WHAT?!!
505
00:28:19,198 --> 00:28:23,330
[CHANGE FALLING]
506
00:28:26,905 --> 00:28:29,707
I DON'T KNOW WHY
I HAVE POCKETS.
507
00:28:29,709 --> 00:28:31,875
ARE YOU IN
THIS CLASS NOW?
508
00:28:31,877 --> 00:28:33,944
WE'RE GOING ON A FIELD TRIP
IN A COUPLE DAYS,
509
00:28:33,946 --> 00:28:36,460
CHICAGO BOTANICAL GARDENS.
510
00:28:36,480 --> 00:28:38,315
I USUALLY WALK
AROUND AND GET HIGH.
511
00:28:38,317 --> 00:28:39,349
I'M REBELLIOUS.
512
00:28:39,351 --> 00:28:40,884
OH, FUN!
513
00:28:40,886 --> 00:28:43,721
TONY GOT ME IN.
PRETTY COOL, RIGHT?
514
00:28:43,723 --> 00:28:44,855
OK, YEAH.
515
00:28:48,159 --> 00:28:49,827
I'M GOING
TO CHEM LAB, YOU?
516
00:28:49,829 --> 00:28:51,829
STUDY.
517
00:28:51,831 --> 00:28:52,896
I'M GONNA
GRAB A POP.
518
00:28:58,470 --> 00:29:00,700
THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
519
00:29:00,720 --> 00:29:01,710
YOU'RE WELCOME.
520
00:29:01,730 --> 00:29:03,400
WHOA, THAT GIRL
IS CHECKING YOU OUT.
521
00:29:03,420 --> 00:29:05,509
DON'T TURN AROUND
TOO FAST.
522
00:29:05,511 --> 00:29:07,411
YOU'RE MAKING IT WORSE,
JUST LOOK.
523
00:29:11,850 --> 00:29:13,884
THAT'S NEVER HAPPENED
TO ME BEFORE.
524
00:29:13,886 --> 00:29:15,452
YEAH RIGHT.
525
00:29:15,454 --> 00:29:17,788
I ALWAYS SEE YOU TALKING
TO GIRLS ALL THE TIME
526
00:29:17,790 --> 00:29:21,910
AND I'VE HEARD LIKE THREE COP
STORIES INVOLVING YOU AND TONY.
527
00:29:21,930 --> 00:29:24,610
I'M ACTUALLY KIND OF
AWESOME OUTSIDE SCHOOL.
528
00:29:24,630 --> 00:29:27,798
I HAVE THIS PLAN THAT I ACT
KIND OF NERDY AND AWKWARD,
529
00:29:27,800 --> 00:29:29,166
SO, THEN I CAN....
530
00:29:29,168 --> 00:29:30,534
...POUNCE LIKE
A SEXUAL PUMA.
531
00:29:30,536 --> 00:29:34,138
EXACTLY, POUNCE
LIKE A SEXUAL PUMA.
532
00:29:34,140 --> 00:29:36,473
LIKE A REALLY
NICE RAPIST.
533
00:29:36,475 --> 00:29:38,976
YEAH, I TRY TO MAKE
THINGS COMFORTABLE.
534
00:29:38,978 --> 00:29:41,440
I WENT ON A DATE WITH THIS
GUY THAT LOOKED LIKE YOU,
535
00:29:41,460 --> 00:29:48,218
LIKE A WELL-MUSCLED,
COMBED HAIR VERSION OF YOU-ISH.
536
00:29:48,220 --> 00:29:49,520
HE WAS IN COLLEGE
537
00:29:49,522 --> 00:29:53,857
AND HE COULD DO ALL THESE
STUPID TRICK-DRIVING THINGS.
538
00:29:53,859 --> 00:29:54,925
WHEN HE COMES
TO PICK ME UP,
539
00:29:54,927 --> 00:29:58,128
I'M STANDING OUTSIDE,
HE DRIVES PAST ME,
540
00:29:58,130 --> 00:30:00,164
HE ROLLS HIS
WINDOW DOWN--
541
00:30:00,166 --> 00:30:04,368
HE ROLLS IT DOWN AND STICKS
HIS FINGER OUT, LIKE THIS,
542
00:30:04,370 --> 00:30:10,274
THEN HE DOES THIS FUCKIN'
CRAZY SPINNING, FISH-TAIL THING
543
00:30:10,276 --> 00:30:13,430
AND FLOORS IT TO
THE END OF MY BLOCK
544
00:30:13,450 --> 00:30:15,813
AND THENS STOPS DIRECTLY
IN FRONT OF ME
545
00:30:15,815 --> 00:30:17,800
LIKE THERE WAS
A FUCKIN' MARK THERE.
546
00:30:17,820 --> 00:30:21,351
IT WAS AMAZING
AND HE WAS FUCKIN' SERIOUS.
547
00:30:21,353 --> 00:30:22,519
I LIKE THAT
HE WAS LIKE
548
00:30:22,521 --> 00:30:24,421
"YOU'RE REALLY GONNA
WANT TO SEE THIS."
549
00:30:24,423 --> 00:30:26,957
EXACTLY, I CAN'T EVEN--
550
00:30:26,959 --> 00:30:28,910
BE CAREFUL WITH
THAT WHORE KIM,
551
00:30:28,930 --> 00:30:29,260
I'VE HEARD STORIES.
552
00:30:29,280 --> 00:30:30,160
LIKE PISSING STORIES.
553
00:30:30,162 --> 00:30:31,862
SHE'S GOING TO YALE.
554
00:30:31,864 --> 00:30:34,131
I'M SORRY,
DID YOU SAY PISSING?
555
00:30:34,133 --> 00:30:36,900
SHE IS STILL
CHECKING YOU OUT.
556
00:30:36,902 --> 00:30:38,235
I'LL SET
A JEALOUSY TRAP.
557
00:30:43,975 --> 00:30:47,411
[WHISPERING]
558
00:30:48,346 --> 00:30:50,414
YOU HAVE GOOSEBUMPS,
PUMA.
559
00:30:53,918 --> 00:30:56,587
SO, I'LL SEE YOU
ON THE TRIP?
560
00:30:56,589 --> 00:30:58,856
YEAH, FOR SURE.
561
00:30:58,858 --> 00:31:00,257
COOL.
562
00:31:00,259 --> 00:31:02,593
DON'T RAPE ANYONE
WITHOUT ME.
563
00:31:02,595 --> 00:31:05,195
[CHUCKLES]
I WON'T.
564
00:31:10,435 --> 00:31:12,202
UGH!!!
[CHANGE FALLS]
565
00:31:15,607 --> 00:31:19,643
I WANNA BE GOOD AT SEX
SO THEY HAVE A NICE TIME TOO.
566
00:31:19,645 --> 00:31:22,312
WHO GIVES A NOODLE
WHAT SHE THINKS?
567
00:31:22,314 --> 00:31:23,647
HOW YOU FIXED
FOR CONDOMS?
568
00:31:23,649 --> 00:31:25,115
I HAVE THE
ONE YOU GAVE ME.
569
00:31:25,117 --> 00:31:28,850
GET A NEW BOX,
PUT ONE ON AND JERK-OFF.
570
00:31:28,870 --> 00:31:31,521
ANY PARTICULAR REASON?
571
00:31:31,523 --> 00:31:33,523
EVER PUT ONE ON BEFORE?
572
00:31:33,525 --> 00:31:35,359
HALF ONE TIME.
573
00:31:35,361 --> 00:31:37,227
PRECISELY.
574
00:31:37,229 --> 00:31:40,664
[TOILET FLUSHING]
575
00:31:40,666 --> 00:31:41,965
SHHH!
576
00:31:45,970 --> 00:31:47,571
DON'T MAKE ANY
SUDDEN MOVEMENTS.
577
00:31:51,676 --> 00:31:53,677
[BLOWING NOSE]
578
00:32:04,422 --> 00:32:05,656
ALLOW ME.
579
00:32:15,967 --> 00:32:17,167
SO, WHAT IF I CAN'T...
580
00:32:21,572 --> 00:32:22,973
I DON'T KNOW
WHAT THAT MEANS.
581
00:32:28,947 --> 00:32:30,800
USE YOUR WORDS.
582
00:32:32,500 --> 00:32:33,283
START THE CAR.
583
00:32:33,285 --> 00:32:35,520
EAT OYSTERS.
584
00:32:35,540 --> 00:32:37,287
YOU'LL BE ABLE TO
HANG TOWELS ON IT.
585
00:32:37,289 --> 00:32:40,230
WET ONES.
586
00:32:42,360 --> 00:32:43,393
I'M GOING TO THE STORE.
587
00:32:43,395 --> 00:32:44,361
NEED ANYTHING?
588
00:32:44,363 --> 00:32:48,198
YES... BUT I
DON'T KNOW WHAT.
589
00:32:51,135 --> 00:32:52,350
I'M GONNA GO TOO.
590
00:32:52,370 --> 00:32:54,271
NO, NO.
I'LL GET IT FOR YOU.
591
00:32:54,273 --> 00:32:56,139
BUT I DON'T
KNOW WHAT I WANT.
592
00:32:56,141 --> 00:32:59,343
THEN I'LL JUST
GO BY MYSELF.
593
00:32:59,345 --> 00:33:01,378
YOU'RE ACTING WEIRD,
I'M DEFINITELY COMING.
594
00:33:04,215 --> 00:33:06,830
HEY!!
595
00:33:06,850 --> 00:33:07,617
BE GINGER WITH
THE DOOR, SON.
596
00:33:07,619 --> 00:33:08,485
SORRY.
597
00:33:10,722 --> 00:33:17,527
[ENGINE NOT TURNING OVER]
598
00:33:17,529 --> 00:33:19,496
SON OF A BITCH!
599
00:33:26,604 --> 00:33:29,339
SHIT.
600
00:33:29,341 --> 00:33:32,776
DISTRIBUTOR COIL
WIRE'S LOOSE,
601
00:33:32,778 --> 00:33:34,478
THIS THING CAN'T
START WITHOUT IT.
602
00:33:34,480 --> 00:33:35,579
HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT?
603
00:33:35,581 --> 00:33:39,316
DAD TAUGHT ME.
604
00:33:39,318 --> 00:33:43,320
WHEN HE GOT THE VAN FROM
GUNZO'S, IT WAS A PIECE OF SHIT.
605
00:33:43,322 --> 00:33:45,722
IT STILL IS,
BUT IT'S A CHARMING ONE.
606
00:33:45,724 --> 00:33:47,190
WHY'D YOU CALL IT
"THE SIN BIN"
607
00:33:47,192 --> 00:33:50,600
WHEN YOU CHEAT IN HOCKEY,
FUCK UP OR WHATEVER,
608
00:33:50,620 --> 00:33:53,263
THEY PUT YOU IN THE "SIN BIN",
THE PENALTY BOX.
609
00:33:53,265 --> 00:33:56,733
GUNZO'S USED TO USE THIS THING
TO PUT BROKEN SHIT IN HERE,
610
00:33:56,735 --> 00:33:59,336
OLD MERCHANDISE.
611
00:33:59,338 --> 00:34:02,105
A LOT OF PEOPLE
FUCKED IN THIS THING.
612
00:34:02,107 --> 00:34:06,309
LAUREN AND I WOULD FOOL AROUND
BACK HERE DURING PARTIES.
613
00:34:06,311 --> 00:34:08,745
SHE'D DRIVE WHEN
I WAS WASTED.
614
00:34:08,747 --> 00:34:10,547
SHE WAS GREAT, SHE'D DRIVE
ME AND MY BUDDIES HOME-
615
00:34:10,549 --> 00:34:12,416
WE WERE PISSING AND
SHITTING AND VOMITTING
616
00:34:12,418 --> 00:34:15,850
LIKE LITERALLY PUKING
ALL OVER EACH OTHER--
617
00:34:15,870 --> 00:34:16,520
THAT'S ENOUGH.
618
00:34:16,522 --> 00:34:19,489
SORRY, I FORGOT ABOUT YOUR
CRIPPLING FEAR OF VOMIT.
619
00:34:27,598 --> 00:34:28,598
WHAT THE FUCK?!
620
00:34:28,600 --> 00:34:32,669
I'M NOT GONNA
LIGHT IT!
621
00:34:32,671 --> 00:34:34,704
I HAD A BLAST
IN THIS THING.
622
00:34:34,706 --> 00:34:36,740
YOU STILL
HAVE A BLAST?
623
00:34:36,742 --> 00:34:38,208
YEAH...
624
00:34:38,210 --> 00:34:41,578
YEAH, TOTALLY MAN...
625
00:34:41,580 --> 00:34:47,150
ME AND THESE DUDES
WERE JUST UP IN CANADA.
626
00:34:47,152 --> 00:34:50,153
WHAT WERE YOU
DOING IN CANADA?
627
00:34:50,155 --> 00:34:52,456
NOTHING.
628
00:34:52,458 --> 00:34:56,259
BUT WE GOT INTO A BIG BAR FIGHT,
ONE OF THE GUYS HAD A MACHETE.
629
00:34:56,261 --> 00:34:57,561
PRETTY FUNNY.
630
00:34:57,563 --> 00:34:59,262
[CHUCKLES]
631
00:35:01,399 --> 00:35:03,633
GO AHEAD, START IT.
632
00:35:03,635 --> 00:35:06,203
IF IT TURNS,
I'M STILL DRIVING.
633
00:35:12,443 --> 00:35:13,844
HEY IT STARTED,
BENNY!
634
00:35:13,846 --> 00:35:15,378
EXACTLY.
635
00:35:20,451 --> 00:35:30,460
[MUSIC]
636
00:35:30,462 --> 00:35:40,570
[MUSIC]
637
00:35:40,572 --> 00:35:53,850
[MUSIC]
638
00:35:56,154 --> 00:35:57,187
BENJAMIN.
639
00:36:03,861 --> 00:36:10,567
I DON'T--
WHERE DO WE EVEN--
640
00:36:10,569 --> 00:36:13,370
MY BROTHER WAS JUST
ASKING ABOUT YOU.
641
00:36:13,372 --> 00:36:15,372
HOW IS HE?
642
00:36:15,374 --> 00:36:17,574
HE'S LITTLE
AND WEIRD.
643
00:36:17,576 --> 00:36:19,509
AND YOUR MOM?
644
00:36:19,511 --> 00:36:23,346
SHE'S...
GONE FOR A BIT.
645
00:36:23,348 --> 00:36:27,450
I'M BABYSITTING BRIAN.
646
00:36:27,452 --> 00:36:30,487
I MISSED YOU.
647
00:36:30,489 --> 00:36:34,357
SO PEOPLE THAT YOU MISS
YOU DON'T CALL FOR SIX YEARS?
648
00:36:34,359 --> 00:36:38,361
I DON'T REALLY TALK
TO PEOPLE ANYMORE.
649
00:36:38,363 --> 00:36:40,730
I HAVEN'T TALKED
TO THAT MANY PEOPLE.
650
00:36:40,732 --> 00:36:43,433
I'M NOT REALLY
PREPARED FOR "THIS."
651
00:36:43,435 --> 00:36:46,770
I AM REALLY SORRY
ABOUT YOUR DAD...
652
00:36:46,772 --> 00:36:49,873
BUT I KINDA WANNA PUNCH
YOU IN THE FACE, BENNY.
653
00:36:49,875 --> 00:36:50,907
DO IT.
654
00:36:50,909 --> 00:37:00,917
[MUSIC]
655
00:37:00,919 --> 00:37:11,228
[MUSIC]
656
00:37:11,230 --> 00:37:16,499
[MUSIC]
657
00:37:16,501 --> 00:37:17,634
OH CRAP.
658
00:37:22,640 --> 00:37:24,641
ARE YOU
STILL A PYRO?
659
00:37:24,643 --> 00:37:26,243
NO.
660
00:37:26,245 --> 00:37:27,444
WHEN DID I TAKE
YOU TO THE HOSPITAL?
661
00:37:27,446 --> 00:37:28,945
JUNIOR YEAR?
662
00:37:28,947 --> 00:37:31,548
YOUR JUNIOR YEAR?
663
00:37:31,550 --> 00:37:33,650
EYEBROWS.
664
00:37:33,652 --> 00:37:34,851
YEAH.
665
00:37:34,853 --> 00:37:36,486
WELL THAT'S WHEN PEOPLE
WERE SHAVING OFF
666
00:37:36,488 --> 00:37:38,455
LARGE PORTIONS
OF THEIR EYEBROWS,
667
00:37:38,457 --> 00:37:39,489
SO I JUST FIGURED
WHY NOT DO IT,
668
00:37:39,491 --> 00:37:41,458
BECAUSE IT'S
JUST DEAD WEIGHT,
669
00:37:41,460 --> 00:37:42,692
DEAD WEIGHT STICKING
ON TOP OF MY HEAD.
670
00:37:42,694 --> 00:37:43,627
YOU KNOW,
IT'S LIKE A--
671
00:37:43,629 --> 00:37:44,961
SO YOU JUST DISAPPEAR
672
00:37:44,963 --> 00:37:47,731
AND YOU DON'T TELL ANYONE
WHERE YOU ARE GOING??
673
00:37:47,733 --> 00:37:49,799
AND YOU THINK YOU'RE
SO COOL DOING IT.
674
00:37:49,801 --> 00:37:55,272
BUT I CHOSE TO BELIEVE THAT
YOU'RE DOING SOMETHING AMAZING.
675
00:37:55,274 --> 00:37:57,407
MAYBE YOU'RE TRAVELING
AND SEEING THE WORLD
676
00:37:57,409 --> 00:37:59,909
OR GETTING YOURSELF
STRAIGHTENED OUT.
677
00:37:59,911 --> 00:38:02,779
BUT I DID NOT THINK
I'D BUMP INTO YOU
678
00:38:02,781 --> 00:38:06,950
IN LIKE I DON'T KNOW,
HAPPY FOOD.
679
00:38:06,952 --> 00:38:08,418
"S"...
680
00:38:08,420 --> 00:38:09,919
HAPPY FOODS, YES.
681
00:38:12,657 --> 00:38:14,591
DID YOU MISS ME?
682
00:38:14,593 --> 00:38:16,359
SWEETIE...
683
00:38:16,361 --> 00:38:18,795
NO ORGANIC.
I KNOW.
684
00:38:18,797 --> 00:38:21,831
THIS IS MY OLD
FRIEND... GARY.
685
00:38:21,833 --> 00:38:23,767
HI.
MICHAEL BELLMAN.
686
00:38:23,769 --> 00:38:26,369
HI.
GARY FLATTERED.
687
00:38:26,371 --> 00:38:28,505
YOU'RE LAST NAME
IS "FLATTERED"?
688
00:38:28,507 --> 00:38:30,730
YES.
689
00:38:30,750 --> 00:38:33,643
FLATTERED TO MEET
YOU, GARY.
690
00:38:33,645 --> 00:38:36,746
BENNY DIE-NESS?
691
00:38:36,748 --> 00:38:39,382
I'M GARY FLATTERED.
692
00:38:39,384 --> 00:38:41,840
WE HAVE
A PROBLEM HERE.
693
00:38:41,860 --> 00:38:45,755
I'VE JUST DETAINED A PERP
ON A SUBJECT 487B.
694
00:38:45,757 --> 00:38:47,857
SHOPLIFTING.
695
00:38:47,859 --> 00:38:50,994
SO WHY DON'T YOU GO GRAB
BENNY WHATEVER.
696
00:38:50,996 --> 00:38:53,630
PERP'S NAME
IS BRIAN DIE-NESS.
697
00:38:53,650 --> 00:38:54,597
HE GAVE US
A DESCRIPTION.
698
00:38:54,599 --> 00:38:56,566
THERE ARE ONLY TWO GENTLEMEN
LEFT IN THE STORE PRESENTLY.
699
00:38:56,568 --> 00:39:00,603
YOU FIT THE DESCRIPTION.
700
00:39:00,605 --> 00:39:02,972
YOU DO NOT.
701
00:39:02,974 --> 00:39:04,541
AND WHAT WAS
THE DESCRIPTION?
702
00:39:04,543 --> 00:39:05,642
THE DESCRIPTION WAS,
703
00:39:05,644 --> 00:39:07,110
A RED AND BLACK
FLANNEL JACKET,
704
00:39:07,112 --> 00:39:11,114
AN OLIVE PAJAMA SHIRT,
AND SOME HIGH PANTS.
705
00:39:11,116 --> 00:39:12,582
BENNY DEINES?
706
00:39:12,584 --> 00:39:15,352
GARY...
FLATTERED.
707
00:39:15,354 --> 00:39:16,986
GARY, BEN.
708
00:39:16,988 --> 00:39:20,557
THAT'S HIM?
OH, SWEETIE.
709
00:39:20,559 --> 00:39:21,725
I WANT YOU TO
COME WITH ME
710
00:39:21,727 --> 00:39:24,761
INTO THE BACK AREA
WHERE WE LOAD THINGS.
711
00:39:24,763 --> 00:39:28,640
WHAT'S SO EMBARRASSING
ABOUT CONDOMS?
712
00:39:28,660 --> 00:39:31,401
I'VE HAD A CASHIER LOOK
AT ME AND BE LIKE, "NICE."
713
00:39:31,403 --> 00:39:32,669
YOU COULD'VE PICKED A
BETTER TIME TO SHOPLIFT.
714
00:39:32,671 --> 00:39:33,570
LAUREN WAS THERE.
715
00:39:33,572 --> 00:39:35,505
NO SHE WAS NOT.
716
00:39:35,507 --> 00:39:37,807
AND HER BOYFRIEND.
717
00:39:37,809 --> 00:39:39,109
HE WAS GOOD LOOKING.
718
00:39:39,111 --> 00:39:41,578
LIKE A VILLAIN.
LIKE A LAWYER.
719
00:39:41,580 --> 00:39:42,746
A LAWYER?
720
00:39:42,748 --> 00:39:44,748
IS THAT A BAD THING?
721
00:39:49,553 --> 00:39:50,787
ARE YOU GONNA TELL MOM?
722
00:39:50,789 --> 00:39:53,623
FUCK NO, LIKE THAT'S A
CONVERSATION I WANT TO HAVE.
723
00:39:53,625 --> 00:39:56,893
SHE'D JUST BLAME ME.
724
00:39:56,895 --> 00:39:59,562
THANKS, BENNY.
725
00:39:59,564 --> 00:40:01,398
GUESS WHAT?
726
00:40:01,400 --> 00:40:04,434
WHAT?
727
00:40:04,436 --> 00:40:05,869
STILL FUCKIN' TOOK 'EM.
728
00:40:05,871 --> 00:40:09,439
OHHH, CRIMINAL!!
729
00:40:37,134 --> 00:40:43,973
[WATER RUNNING]
730
00:40:55,853 --> 00:40:57,554
YOU'RE NOT
DOING THAT RIGHT.
731
00:40:57,556 --> 00:40:59,220
HERE DO THIS.
732
00:40:59,240 --> 00:41:01,658
[SLURPING DRINK]
733
00:41:03,961 --> 00:41:09,650
[KNOCKING ON WINDOW]
734
00:41:14,238 --> 00:41:15,380
WHAT?
735
00:41:15,400 --> 00:41:16,473
I NEED THE BIN.
736
00:41:16,475 --> 00:41:17,740
EMERGENCY.
737
00:41:17,742 --> 00:41:19,142
WHY DIDN'T
YOU JUST CALL ME?
738
00:41:19,144 --> 00:41:21,678
BECAUSE I DIDN'T.
739
00:41:21,680 --> 00:41:23,513
HURRY UP, HONEY, I HAVE
A WHOOPEE APPOINTMENT.
740
00:41:31,121 --> 00:41:32,188
GOOD THROW.
741
00:41:39,730 --> 00:41:41,598
JESUS! WHAT THE--
742
00:41:57,214 --> 00:42:00,517
I'VE DONE SOME
REALLY WEIRD SHIT,
743
00:42:00,519 --> 00:42:02,886
SO IF YOU WANT
TO TALK ABOUT--
744
00:42:02,888 --> 00:42:05,154
I'M FINE.
745
00:42:12,796 --> 00:42:14,630
COULD YOU SIGN THIS?
746
00:42:18,200 --> 00:42:20,870
WHAT DID I JUST
SIGN AND WHY?
747
00:42:20,872 --> 00:42:23,540
TECHNICALLY YOU'RE
MY GUARDIAN,
748
00:42:23,542 --> 00:42:27,143
AND IT'S A PERMISSION SLIP
FOR A FIELD TRIP TOMORROW.
749
00:42:34,510 --> 00:42:36,586
HOW DO YOU FINGER A GIRL?
750
00:42:38,122 --> 00:42:39,155
I KNOW YOU
DIDN'T ASK ME TO,
751
00:42:39,157 --> 00:42:40,290
BUT I WANNA TELL
HER ABOUT US.
752
00:42:43,727 --> 00:42:44,794
DON'T DO THAT.
753
00:42:44,796 --> 00:42:45,929
YOU NEVER LET
ME DO THAT.
754
00:42:45,931 --> 00:42:47,630
NOT THE HAIR THING-
755
00:42:47,650 --> 00:42:48,898
YES, DON'T DO
THE HAIR THING,
756
00:42:48,900 --> 00:42:52,168
BUT DON'T BREAK UP
WITH HER FOR ME.
757
00:42:52,170 --> 00:42:55,838
I DID THIS,
I WANT TO.
758
00:42:55,840 --> 00:42:58,975
WELL...
759
00:42:58,977 --> 00:43:02,946
I GOT YOU SOMETHING.
760
00:43:02,948 --> 00:43:04,847
CLOSE YOUR EYES.
761
00:43:04,849 --> 00:43:07,951
CLOSE THEM.
762
00:43:07,953 --> 00:43:09,180
OKAY.
763
00:43:19,363 --> 00:43:21,364
WOW.
764
00:43:21,366 --> 00:43:23,900
YOU DON'T LIKE IT?
765
00:43:23,902 --> 00:43:27,637
NO, I REALLY LIKE IT.
766
00:43:27,639 --> 00:43:33,309
I FEEL LIKE I SHOULD
TALK DIFFERENT WITH IT ON.
767
00:43:33,311 --> 00:43:35,110
THANK YOU.
768
00:43:42,820 --> 00:43:45,154
DO YOU MISS BEING HOME?
769
00:43:45,156 --> 00:43:50,260
KIDS I WENT TO HIGH SCHOOL
WITH ARE MARRIED.
770
00:43:50,280 --> 00:43:55,732
NOW, THEY HAVE KIDS,
AND DOGS.
771
00:43:55,734 --> 00:43:58,267
I HAVE A WEIRD
THING WITH ANIMALS.
772
00:43:58,269 --> 00:44:04,774
A BUNCH OF FRIENDS OF MINE
FOUND THIS CAT IN AN ALLEY.
773
00:44:04,776 --> 00:44:08,878
I DROPPED IT OFF A ROOF
TO SEE WHAT WOULD HAPPEN.
774
00:44:08,880 --> 00:44:13,383
TO SEE IF IT
LANDED ON ITS FEET?
775
00:44:13,385 --> 00:44:17,220
I KNEW IT WOULD DIE.
776
00:44:17,222 --> 00:44:22,250
I JUST WANTED TO WATCH,
YOU KNOW,
777
00:44:22,270 --> 00:44:24,427
ITS LAST MOMENT
ON EARTH.
778
00:44:30,401 --> 00:44:32,100
JUST KIDDING.
779
00:44:32,300 --> 00:44:34,370
[CHUCKLES]
780
00:44:36,674 --> 00:44:46,683
[MUSIC]
781
00:44:46,685 --> 00:44:56,793
[MUSIC]
782
00:44:56,795 --> 00:45:05,201
[MUSIC]
783
00:45:05,203 --> 00:45:06,836
[SCHOOL BELL RINGS]
784
00:45:06,838 --> 00:45:09,172
THIS IS REASSIGNMENT.
785
00:45:09,174 --> 00:45:11,307
YOU ARE TO QUIET STUDY.
786
00:45:11,309 --> 00:45:13,209
YOU GET A HALF PERIOD
FOR LUNCH.
787
00:45:16,914 --> 00:45:18,470
HERE YOU GO.
788
00:45:31,261 --> 00:45:33,296
SON, WHAT ARE
YOU DOING HERE?
789
00:45:33,298 --> 00:45:35,798
I'M SORRY SIR,
I WAS TARDY.
790
00:45:35,800 --> 00:45:37,166
TARDY?
791
00:45:37,168 --> 00:45:38,501
HOW MANY TIMES?
792
00:45:38,503 --> 00:45:39,335
TEN TIMES.
793
00:45:39,337 --> 00:45:40,870
TEN!?
794
00:45:40,872 --> 00:45:42,905
JEEZ LOUISE.
795
00:45:42,907 --> 00:45:48,111
YOU'RE WALKING A TIGHTLY-ROPED,
HIGH-OCTANE DANGER ZONE.
796
00:45:48,113 --> 00:45:49,846
WHEN WE GAVE YOU
THIS SCHOLARSHIP
797
00:45:49,848 --> 00:45:52,782
IT WAS BECAUSE OF YOUR
ACADEMIC PROMISE.
798
00:45:52,784 --> 00:45:54,884
YOU DON'T WANT
TO SCREW THIS UP.
799
00:45:54,886 --> 00:45:57,220
YOU DON'T SEE
TONY IN HERE.
800
00:45:57,222 --> 00:45:59,155
OKAY,
NEVER AGAIN.
801
00:45:59,157 --> 00:46:01,324
ABSOLUTELY NOT, SIR.
802
00:46:01,326 --> 00:46:03,526
OKAY GOOD, HIGH OCTANE.
803
00:46:03,528 --> 00:46:06,262
TOUCH THE SKY.
804
00:46:06,264 --> 00:46:07,897
YES!
805
00:46:09,767 --> 00:46:13,870
IT'S A GREAT DAY TO
BE ALIVE EVERYBODY.
806
00:46:13,872 --> 00:46:16,873
GREAT DAY.
807
00:46:16,875 --> 00:46:18,107
SORRY.
808
00:46:20,544 --> 00:46:23,179
WHAT THE HELL,
PUMA?
809
00:46:23,181 --> 00:46:24,800
I'M SORRY, I GOT "REO".
810
00:46:24,820 --> 00:46:26,482
YOU'RE A BAD KID.
811
00:46:26,484 --> 00:46:28,284
HOW WERE THE
BOTANICAL GARDENS?
812
00:46:28,286 --> 00:46:29,352
BORING AS FUCK,
813
00:46:29,354 --> 00:46:33,389
BUT SOMEHOW REALLY
PRETTY AND INSPIRING..
814
00:46:33,391 --> 00:46:35,570
PUMA?
815
00:46:35,590 --> 00:46:37,794
SORRY... WHAT?
816
00:46:37,796 --> 00:46:39,328
EH, IT WAS
SOMETHING ABOUT FLOWERS.
817
00:46:39,330 --> 00:46:40,563
I GOTTA GO.
WILL I SEE YOU MONDAY
818
00:46:40,565 --> 00:46:43,132
OR YOU GONNA GET BUSTED
FOR SOMETHING ELSE?
819
00:46:43,134 --> 00:46:45,134
WE'LL SEE...
820
00:46:45,136 --> 00:46:46,335
OK.
821
00:46:46,337 --> 00:46:48,504
LATER, PUMA!
822
00:47:01,351 --> 00:47:02,885
HI!
823
00:47:02,887 --> 00:47:04,287
HEY!
824
00:47:04,289 --> 00:47:07,890
SO, I WANTED TO
ASK YOU SOMETHING.
825
00:47:07,910 --> 00:47:08,424
YOU HAVE
AMERICAN STUDIES, RIGHT?
826
00:47:08,426 --> 00:47:09,458
YEAH.
827
00:47:09,460 --> 00:47:11,460
I KINDA NEED
HELP WITH THE REVIEW,
828
00:47:11,462 --> 00:47:14,960
DO YOU THINK NEXT WEEK WE
COULD HANG AND YOU COULD...
829
00:47:14,980 --> 00:47:17,600
HELP ME?
830
00:47:17,602 --> 00:47:19,368
I'D LOVE TO.
831
00:47:23,842 --> 00:47:27,844
WHERE IS THIS
COMING FROM, HANDSOME?
832
00:47:27,846 --> 00:47:29,111
I'M BEING SERIOUS.
HAVE YOU?
833
00:47:29,113 --> 00:47:30,346
LOWER THE
BIG-BOY VOICE PLEASE.
834
00:47:30,348 --> 00:47:32,248
YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND.
835
00:47:32,250 --> 00:47:35,170
I'M NOT GONNA LET THAT SULLIED
WHAT I HAVE WITH SUZIE.
836
00:47:39,623 --> 00:47:41,570
I'M GONNA TELL
YOU THIS ONCE:
837
00:47:41,590 --> 00:47:43,392
ERICA'S A VERY SHARP GIRL,
VERY PRETTY, VERY SWEET,
838
00:47:43,394 --> 00:47:44,594
SHE SMELLS LIKE FALL.
839
00:47:44,596 --> 00:47:45,561
NOVEMBER-ISH.
840
00:47:45,563 --> 00:47:50,633
BUT SHE FUCKS
LIKE A BLOW UP DOLL.
841
00:47:50,635 --> 00:47:51,934
I SPENT THE DAY
IN REO.
842
00:47:51,936 --> 00:47:52,902
THANKS FOR LEAVING
THE KEY.
843
00:47:52,904 --> 00:47:55,104
I'M SORRY, BUDDY-BOY.
844
00:47:55,106 --> 00:47:56,439
ESPECIALLY ABOUT
THE FIELD TRIP,
845
00:47:56,441 --> 00:48:00,576
I KNOW YOU WERE LOOKING
FORWARD TO THAT.
846
00:48:00,578 --> 00:48:01,577
HAVE A SEAT.
847
00:48:03,881 --> 00:48:05,982
SIT.
848
00:48:09,253 --> 00:48:17,627
DON'T LET MY INFIDELITIES
SALT OUR ARRANGEMENT.
849
00:48:17,629 --> 00:48:22,640
BECAUSE IF YOU
TOLD SOMEBODY...
850
00:48:22,660 --> 00:48:25,902
I'LL GET INSIDE YOUR MIND
AND I'LL FUCK MY WAY OUT.
851
00:48:27,304 --> 00:48:32,475
[TOILET FLUSHING]
852
00:48:49,293 --> 00:48:50,993
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
853
00:48:50,995 --> 00:48:53,129
TRAIN FARE.
854
00:48:53,131 --> 00:48:55,231
MY TREAT.
855
00:48:55,233 --> 00:48:56,299
IF I TAKE THAT MONEY
FROM YOU,
856
00:48:56,301 --> 00:48:58,501
THEN WHAT WE'RE DOING
FEELS PRETTY BAD.
857
00:48:58,503 --> 00:49:01,270
WE HAVEN'T
DONE ANYTHING.
858
00:49:01,272 --> 00:49:04,240
TAKE IT.
859
00:49:04,242 --> 00:49:06,375
I'M GOING TO SPEND IT
ON SOMETHING ELSE.
860
00:49:10,681 --> 00:49:12,548
AT LEAST
YOU'LL HESITATE.
861
00:49:23,126 --> 00:49:24,293
I DON'T WANNA
GO HOME.
862
00:49:24,295 --> 00:49:25,227
I GOTTA GO.
863
00:49:25,229 --> 00:49:27,163
IT'S HER MOTHER'S
BIRTHDAY.
864
00:49:27,165 --> 00:49:30,990
YOU CAN GO.
865
00:49:30,101 --> 00:49:31,400
I DON'T WANT
TO GO HOME.
866
00:49:31,402 --> 00:49:33,235
I'LL SIT RIGHT HERE.
867
00:49:33,237 --> 00:49:35,370
IT'S NOT MY VAN.
868
00:49:35,390 --> 00:49:40,176
WHO'S VAN IS THIS?
869
00:49:40,178 --> 00:49:42,511
A FRIEND'S.
870
00:49:42,513 --> 00:49:43,446
JUST PUT THE KEY BACK?
871
00:49:43,448 --> 00:49:45,381
WHY DON'T WE
USE YOUR CAR?
872
00:49:45,383 --> 00:49:47,350
NO, BECAUSE MY
TRANSMISSION'S SLOW
873
00:49:47,352 --> 00:49:50,720
AND OTHER SILLINESS
I CAN'T AFFORD RIGHT NOW.
874
00:49:50,722 --> 00:49:52,221
THEN WHY ARE
YOU GIVING ME MONEY?
875
00:49:52,223 --> 00:49:53,656
STOP.
876
00:49:53,658 --> 00:49:56,292
OK, JUST PUT
THE KEY BACK.
877
00:49:56,294 --> 00:49:57,393
I'LL PUT THE KEY BACK,
I'LL PUT THE KEY BACK,
878
00:49:57,395 --> 00:49:59,261
I'LL PUT THE KEY BACK!
879
00:50:17,381 --> 00:50:27,390
[MUSIC]
880
00:50:27,392 --> 00:50:37,500
[MUSIC]
881
00:50:37,502 --> 00:51:08,497
[MUSIC]
882
00:51:08,499 --> 00:51:10,433
[CAR HORN SOUNDS]
883
00:51:10,435 --> 00:51:17,206
[MUSIC]
884
00:51:17,208 --> 00:51:18,707
COME ON.
885
00:51:18,709 --> 00:51:28,717
[MUSIC]
886
00:51:28,719 --> 00:51:34,790
[MUSIC]
887
00:51:38,328 --> 00:51:41,831
HEY PUMA, DON'T YOU
EVEN THINK ABOUT POUNCING-
888
00:51:41,833 --> 00:51:44,567
YOU FUCKING PUSSY.
889
00:51:44,569 --> 00:51:46,669
JESUS.
890
00:52:02,652 --> 00:52:04,553
WHAT ARE YOU
DOING HERE?
891
00:52:04,555 --> 00:52:05,821
BIN'S MINE TONIGHT.
892
00:52:05,823 --> 00:52:08,691
SEE.
I WROTE IT DOWN.
893
00:52:08,693 --> 00:52:11,193
SOMEONE'S IN THERE.
894
00:52:11,195 --> 00:52:12,294
THAT WHORE KIM?
895
00:52:12,296 --> 00:52:13,429
DID SHE HUM?
896
00:52:13,431 --> 00:52:16,465
NO IT'S NOT
THAT WHORE KIM.
897
00:52:16,467 --> 00:52:19,301
IS A HUMAN
ACTUALLY IN THERE?
898
00:52:24,241 --> 00:52:25,407
SHIT!
899
00:52:28,912 --> 00:52:30,713
TH-THAT'S NOT
WHAT YOU THINK.
900
00:52:30,715 --> 00:52:32,314
OH, NO, IT'S BETTER!
901
00:52:32,316 --> 00:52:35,184
YOU MIGHT ACTUALLY
MATTER NOW.
902
00:52:35,186 --> 00:52:36,619
I'M DEFINITELY GOING TO HAVE TO
REARRANGE SOME STUFF TONIGHT,
903
00:52:36,621 --> 00:52:39,722
BUT GOD DAMMIT
I'M PROUD OF YOU.
904
00:52:39,724 --> 00:52:42,892
THAT MEANS THE
WORLD TO ME MAN.
905
00:52:42,894 --> 00:52:44,593
GOOD LUCK WITH THAT.
906
00:52:50,834 --> 00:52:52,501
GIMME THE KEYS.
I NEED THE BIN.
907
00:52:52,503 --> 00:52:54,203
WHAT? NO. I CAN'T.
908
00:52:54,205 --> 00:52:56,272
GIVE ME THE KEYS,
IT'S MY CAR.
909
00:52:56,274 --> 00:52:57,306
WAS YOUR CAR.
910
00:52:57,308 --> 00:52:58,941
THERE'S A GIRL
IN THERE.
911
00:52:58,943 --> 00:53:00,910
GIMME THE FUCKIN'
KEYS BRIAN.
912
00:53:00,912 --> 00:53:03,779
NO.
913
00:53:03,781 --> 00:53:04,813
YES.
914
00:53:10,720 --> 00:53:12,521
[BANG!]
915
00:53:12,523 --> 00:53:13,822
WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?
916
00:53:13,824 --> 00:53:16,525
SEE, I WASN'T
LYING!
917
00:53:16,527 --> 00:53:17,793
IT'S A REAL
LIFE GIRL.
918
00:53:26,336 --> 00:53:29,305
I NEED YOUR HELP,
I GOTTA MOVE HER.
919
00:53:29,307 --> 00:53:33,342
NOT MY PROBLEM.
920
00:53:33,344 --> 00:53:36,579
I DIDN'T GIVE YOU A HARD TIME
WHEN YOU MOVED AWAY
921
00:53:36,581 --> 00:53:39,415
OR ASK YOU FOR
ANYTHING WHEN DAD DIED.
922
00:53:39,417 --> 00:53:44,720
SO HELP ME MOVE
THE DRUNK GIRL UPSTAIRS.
923
00:53:44,722 --> 00:53:46,622
WELL, WHEN YOU
PUT IT LIKE THAT...
924
00:53:46,624 --> 00:53:48,757
I THOUGHT SO.
925
00:53:48,759 --> 00:53:51,260
GOT TO LIFT HER UP.
926
00:53:51,262 --> 00:53:54,430
[CRYING]
927
00:53:57,367 --> 00:54:00,336
I'VE NEVER WITNESSED AN
ACTUAL PASSING OUT BEFORE.
928
00:54:00,338 --> 00:54:02,238
I DOUBT THAT.
929
00:54:02,240 --> 00:54:04,807
HOW DO WE DO THIS?
930
00:54:04,809 --> 00:54:06,508
GRAB HER BY THE ASS,
IT'S EASIER.
931
00:54:06,510 --> 00:54:09,245
I'M NOT GRABBING HER ASS
WHILE SHE'S PASSED OUT.
932
00:54:09,247 --> 00:54:11,130
I'M NOT SAYING DO IT
LIKE A PERVERT.
933
00:54:11,150 --> 00:54:15,718
I'M SAYING, DO IT LIKE
YOU WERE TOUCHING GRANDMA.
934
00:54:15,720 --> 00:54:18,254
THAT IS AWFUL.
935
00:54:18,256 --> 00:54:19,822
SHE'S HEAVIER THAN SHIT.
936
00:54:19,824 --> 00:54:21,657
SHUT-UP, YOU'LL
GIVE HER A COMPLEX.
937
00:54:21,659 --> 00:54:23,592
SHE'S A DRUNK GIRL
IN A VAN.
938
00:54:23,594 --> 00:54:25,794
WHAT ARE YOU
TWO J.O'S DOIN'?
939
00:54:25,796 --> 00:54:27,563
FUCK, LOOK NOW WHAT YOU DID.
940
00:54:27,565 --> 00:54:29,265
IS SHE DEAD?
941
00:54:29,267 --> 00:54:29,999
YES, OFFICER.
942
00:54:30,100 --> 00:54:34,370
YOU CAUGHT US.
WE KILLED HER.
943
00:54:34,372 --> 00:54:36,538
THAT'S WHY YOU
GRAB HER BY THE ASS.
944
00:54:36,540 --> 00:54:39,942
OKAY. CRACKER, NO!
945
00:54:41,745 --> 00:54:43,612
THAT'S A GOOD JOJO.
946
00:54:43,614 --> 00:54:47,549
BIP-BIP-BIP.
947
00:54:47,551 --> 00:54:49,385
SHE DRANK
A LITTLE TOO MUCH.
948
00:54:49,387 --> 00:54:50,419
WE'RE PUTTING
HER UPSTAIRS
949
00:54:50,421 --> 00:54:51,587
AND SHE IS NOT DEAD
950
00:54:51,589 --> 00:54:53,889
WE GOTTA COME UP
WITH A STRATEGY,
951
00:54:53,891 --> 00:54:55,691
COME UP WITH SOME
KIND OF ROUTE HERE.
952
00:54:55,693 --> 00:54:56,325
WE GOT IT MAN.
953
00:54:56,327 --> 00:54:57,559
JUST GO HOME.
954
00:54:57,561 --> 00:54:59,728
I'M NOT GONNA EXCHANGE
IDEAS WITH YOU.
955
00:54:59,730 --> 00:55:02,331
I'VE OPTED TO
EXPEDITE THIS SITUATION.
956
00:55:02,333 --> 00:55:03,999
YOU'RE NOT THE
BOSS OF US, MAN!
957
00:55:04,100 --> 00:55:06,680
GET HER MID-SECTION.
958
00:55:06,700 --> 00:55:07,360
FINE.
959
00:55:07,380 --> 00:55:08,337
SHE'S REALLY
A VERY NICE GIRL.
960
00:55:08,339 --> 00:55:10,706
CAN YOU SMELL
MY PERIOD?
961
00:55:12,842 --> 00:55:14,900
WHAT'S HER NAME?
962
00:55:14,110 --> 00:55:15,511
JANE.
963
00:55:15,513 --> 00:55:17,479
JANE?!
964
00:55:17,481 --> 00:55:18,614
DO YOU HAVE TO FLASH THE LIGHT
IN HER FACE LIKE THAT?
965
00:55:18,616 --> 00:55:21,550
I DO, ACTUALLY.
966
00:55:21,552 --> 00:55:22,718
JANE?
967
00:55:22,720 --> 00:55:25,421
DO YOU KNOW
WHERE YOU ARE?
968
00:55:25,423 --> 00:55:27,220
THE WORLD.
969
00:55:27,240 --> 00:55:28,991
YOU AND YOUR
GOD DAMN VAN.
970
00:55:28,993 --> 00:55:30,859
THIS IS YOUR VAN?
971
00:55:30,861 --> 00:55:32,895
ALRIGHT.
972
00:55:32,897 --> 00:55:35,364
ONE...
973
00:55:35,366 --> 00:55:36,799
TWO...
974
00:55:36,801 --> 00:55:38,434
THREE.
975
00:55:38,436 --> 00:55:40,536
SHE IS HEAVIER
THAN SHIT.
976
00:55:40,538 --> 00:55:41,804
THAT'S WHAT
I SAID...
977
00:55:58,555 --> 00:55:59,688
WHY IS THE
DOOR LOCKED?
978
00:55:59,690 --> 01:42:03,349
BENNY, WHY'D YOU
LOCK THE DOOR!?
71117
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
